NamespacesPageDiscussViewsViewPage toolsPage toolsView sourceHistory Holes/log dump

All logs, by session. Mostly.

Session 0

Frezak (GM): Hokay.
Frezak (GM) waves.
Apheori (GM): This thing is daft.
Frezak (GM): Daft?
How?
rolling 1D8r+1D6+7
(
4
)
+
(
4
)
+7
=
15
Apheori (GM): You said stuff and it put it off the screen instead of scrolling down to it. >.<
What's the icon?
Frezak (GM): I dragged a Kobold.
Because all maps are better with Kobolds.
Apheori (GM): How are we supposed to know it's kobold?
Frezak (GM): there.
Apheori (GM): Hmm.
How are you supposed to move the camera?
Frezak (GM): Rick-click+drag.
with the hand toool.
Kobold Horde: BEHOLD.
Frezak (GM): So.
The tools.
Apheori (GM): What's the comb tool?
Frezak (GM): it's a ruler.
Apheori (GM): This UX is awful.
Frezak (GM): What?
Apheori (GM): Design. Stuff.
Frezak (GM): Don't knock it, lady.
It's free.
Apheori (GM): Pfft, mediawiki is free, but at least we LABEL things...
Frezak (GM): So that was the initiative tracker.
Apheori (GM): What was?
Frezak (GM): You can right-click tokens to add them.
The popup there.
The clock button.
the gear button can sort them once all the initiatives are typed in.
The arrow moves it 1 along.
Apheori (GM): Huh.
Frezak (GM): On a token, one click gives 3 bubbles and 2 buttons.
The bubbles can be edited from the main view.
Or.
If you click the popup gear icon.
You get fun options.
The other button adds markers to track effects and shizzle.
Apheori (GM): I have no idea what this means.
Frezak (GM): Okay, the edit screen for a token.
Represents Character means you can bind a token to a Journal character.
I have made the Kobold Horde in the Journal.
That's the... third icon above the chatbox.
By changing one token to be bound to the Kobold horde character, I change it's name.
Apheori (GM): Well, those have labels, at least.
They got about everything else wrong, though...
Argh.
So...
It moved.
Frezak (GM): I dragged it.
WHen you drag a token, it looks like it slides for everyone else.
SO they can see how it moved.
Kelly (GM): Cool.
Frezak (GM): You can do all kinds of stuff with the token buttons.
if you have a token that represents a character, you can go to a journal entry and click Edit and bind the token to the entry.
SO dragging the name from the Journal would reproduce the token.
Great for placing players on a new map.
Kelly (GM): How do you make tokens?
How are players...
Er...
Frezak (GM): Two ways.
Either you drag a picture from your machine onto the map.
Or you go to the second button above the chat and search for a token.
Kelly (GM): To chrome? Not bloody likely that that'd work...
Frezak (GM): WELL TRY.
Kelly (GM): WELL EXCUSE ME.
Frezak (GM): NO.
Escusage isn't a thing I do.
Kelly (GM): What's the egg on the horde?
Frezak (GM): It's a ninja head I think.
I just pressed the dot popup on the token dropdown and added it.
It's for tracking states and effects easily.
Kelly (GM): Huh.
Frezak (GM): The box Button on the side menu is... well, fairly self-explanatory.
Layers.
In any layer, can't mess with the others.
Kelly (GM): There. Twilight character.
Frezak (GM): So you don't accidentally start shifting pieces of background.
Frezak (GM) sighs.
the skies sob.
Kelly (GM): Totally.
I lack good icons.
Can I use blobs for everything?
Frezak (GM): You /could/
You sure you can't drag things onto the map?
Kelly (GM): It seemed to work?
Except it's really slow because it's all on another computer because my harddrive failed.
Frezak (GM): This is a bunny.
Kelly (GM): It doesn't support svgs.
Apparently.
Frezak (GM): Whatever that is.
Kelly (GM): A fairly standard format for icons and other simple designs.
Frezak (GM): Well, you can use the inbuilt image search.
Rick-cliking on things can let you do the copypasta stuff and flip them between layers.
Kelly (GM): Er.
Frezak (GM): What?
Kelly (GM): It's slow.
Interesting.
Okay.
Sure I can't just use blobs?
>.>
Frezak (GM): Ehhhh.
You /could/.
Might get a bit boring after a bit >.>
But that's up to you.
The next thing is more D&D related.
Encounter building, specifically.
Kelly (GM) panics.
Frezak (GM): STOP PANICKING.
Kelly (GM): Also, ghah, why does this thing expect me to CLICK on it to do stuff?
Frezak (GM): Gan will give you a thing.
Kelly (GM): What the hell is wrong with it?!
Kelly (GM) panics some more.
Kelly (GM): Thing?
Frezak (GM): Thing.
The Dungeon Master's Guide.
It has tables and list and help.
Kelly (GM): Ah.
Frezak (GM): You'll be wanting the Monster Manuals eventually.
For monsters.
Right now, we want to look at page.... uhh
57.
Kelly (GM): Dude, it's still downloading.
Okay.
Frezak (GM): Okay, so.
There are... 4 types of monster.
And I think 5 'classes'
Minions.
Standard.
Elite.
Frezak (GM): Solo.
Minions are cheap (XP wise) and only have 1 HP.
Elites are tougher than standard monsters, and Solos can take on a whole party by themselves.
Of course, the tougher the monster, the more XP it's worth.
Kelly (GM): Right.
Frezak (GM): When you're building an encounter, keep XP values in mind as that's the real thing that determines how many beasties of what kind.
Monsters can be... soldiers, skirmishers, controllers, brutes and Lurkers.
It's a guideline on what they do in a fight.
You'll want to see that you have monsters that work together.
Like building a deck.
I have some example monsters here.
Frezak (GM): Encounter level 1 for 4 players is 400 XP.
I have... A level 1 brute worth 100 XP. an L1 minion skirmisher for 25 and an L2 artillery for 125.
(artillery. Knew there was a monster class I missed)
Ya'll want to keep things varied.
So just spamming minions won't do, since a few AOE powers will clear them out in no time.
Kelly (GM): Oh, there will be a room full of fanged hams.
Frezak (GM): So i'll go for... 1 L2 artillery. 2 L1 brutes. And fill the rest with minions.
THis is for general encounters.
Kelly (GM): Ah.
Frezak (GM): You're totally free to make things up.
LIke, have a room where monsters pop out of holes every turn.
Kelly (GM): Sounds plausible.
Frezak (GM): ANd the party has to cross the room and close the door or be eaten.
FOr that, you're not using normal encounter design.
Page 42 will also be very helpful.
As a DM, it's the best page.
You'll be using that if someone pushes someone else into a brazier, or traps them under a falling pillar.
Or drops a chandelier on someone.
Kelly (GM): Is there a skill for grabbing?
Frezak (GM): yes.
Yes there is.
The Gnoll is built on it.
DO you have the Player's Handbook?
Kelly (GM): Nope.
Frezak (GM): GRAB: STANDARD ACTION
✦ Target: You can attempt to grab a creature that is
smaller than you, the same size category as you, or
one category larger than you. The creature must be
within your melee reach (don’t count extra reach
from a weapon).
Frezak (GM): ✦ Strength Attack: Make a Strength attack vs. Reflex.
Do not add any weapon modifiers. You must have at
least one hand free to make a grab attempt.
Hit: The enemy is immobilized until it escapes
or you end the grab. Your enemy can attempt to
escape on its turn.
Frezak (GM): ✦ Sustaining a Grab: You sustain a grab as a minor
action. You can end a grab as a free action.
✦ Effects that End a Grab: If you are affected by a
condition that prevents you from taking opportunity
actions (such as dazed, stunned, surprised, or unconscious),
you immediately let go of a grabbed enemy.
Frezak (GM): If you move away from the creature you’re grabbing,
you let go and the grab ends. If a pull, a push, or a
slide moves you or the creature you’re grabbing out
of your reach, the grab ends.
Kelly (GM): Fancy.
Frezak (GM): And there's a roll to drag people you're grabbing, too.
LIke drag them and push them off a cliff.
We made up rules for picking people and hurling them.
The Gnoll picked up a giant bug and threw it into an acidic ooze monster last session.
Kelly (GM): Neat.
And oh dear.
Frezak (GM): Oh dear what?
Kelly (GM): This is scary.
A lot to deal with.
A lot of stuff.
Frezak (GM): It's a lot simpler and faster once you've dealt with it a bit.
This is what a monster stat block looks like.
You can always reflavour how they do things and totally ignore powers if you want.
Kelly (GM): What's shifting?
Frezak (GM): Hokay.
Two main types of move you'll see in the game.
First one is a straight move.
You move you speed (Six for just about everything)
But moving away or around an enemy with a simple move will give them a free stab as you go past.
A shift is you moving just 1 square, but not provoking Opportunity Attacks.
Frezak (GM): It's moving carefully while keeping your guard up.
Kelly (GM): Ah.
Frezak (GM): Normally difficult terrain costs 2 squares of movement.
To move into.
And since a shift is 1 square, you cant shift into a square of difficult terrain.
Except this dude.
Kelly (GM): Elfy.
Frezak (GM): Two types of Immediate actions.
Both can't be used on the creature's turn, or more than once a round.
Reactions happen after attacks are resolved, interrupts before.
So 'Not So Close' doesn't let them evade attacks.
But would let the archer not be in melee on their turn, so able to move instead of shift and try and find a better spot.
Kelly (GM): In melee?
Frezak (GM): Yeah, in melee range of a guy. touching on the grid.
Because the other thing that can give people a chance at an Opportunity Attack (OA) is making a ranged attack while someone is within melee range.
So if the archer tries to shoot with a fighter next to him, the guy can swing at the elf.
Same with PCs.
If the Artificer tries to cast a spell while a goblin is next to him, he's risking stabbination.
Unless he shifts first, in which case the goblin can just move 1 next turn and stab again.
Kelly (GM): And if he runs away like normal, that also risks stabination?
Frezak (GM): If he walks away, yes.
Every turn, you have a Standard action, a move action and a Minor action to use.
Any of these can be 'devolved' into the next one.
Kelly (GM): What?
Frezak (GM): So if the caster REALLY wants to get away, he can shift and then use his standard action to move again instead of attacking.
Standard>move>minor.
Kelly (GM): Ah.
Frezak (GM): So, you can use your standard to attack or use most powers.
But you can also charge.
WHich means you use a standard to give you a move in a straight line and an attack, both part of the standard action.
So you could move 6, then charge to move up to another 6 AND attack.
Making it tough to get out of melee range for most characters.
Kelly (GM): Eeek.
Frezak (GM): Yeah.
But there are a lot of things to help with that.
For instance, My guy can create a zone that mean that people leaving it are knocked prone.
Being prone means you have to spend a move action just to stand up.
ANd there are some powers that give you shifts as part of attacks.
Like the Ranger Nimble Strike power lets you attack, and shift before or after the attack.
Frezak (GM): Leaving your move action intact.
And there are power to deny shifts and whatever, but generally, once a melee guy is laying into someone, he's gonna be tough to shake off.
DMs will like to have someone harrying the flimsy casters.
Kelly (GM): Kill them back, then.
Harry everyone!
Frezak (GM): Keeping them on the run and denying them positioning.
So.
I'll find a few monsters and set up an encounter for next time.
Let you have a look at the things and what they do.
Kelly (GM): Fun.
I hope.
The Gravedigger: Tessting
Frezak (GM): Hokay, tap the little blue page picture. And go to the other map.
Kelly (GM): Whoaaah.
Frezak (GM): tadaaa
With the monsters for easy reference.
Though they're in map layer, since GM layer makes them semi-transparent.
I can send you the monster blocks seperately if you want.
Also, if you drag one of the player names from the Journal, i'tll pop a fresh token.
That refers the HP listed in the journal entry.
Kelly (GM): What monster blocks?
Are they somewhere?
Frezak (GM): Far right of the map.
Kelly (GM): I see nothing.
Frezak (GM): That's odd.
Five squares past the archer?
Off the pretty map?
Kelly (GM): Just white.
Frezak (GM): Bugger.
I'll email them to you, then.
Kelly (GM): Shovel.
Frezak (GM): Do you see the thing now?
Kelly (GM): Yes.
Frezak (GM): Any of it not make sense? >.>
Kelly (GM): A missed attack never damages a minion? What does that mean?
Frezak (GM): Some powers have a thing where they deal damage even if they miss.
What this means is that effect doesn't count on minions.
Kelly (GM): Ah.
Like a fireball, or like something slightly more... nuanced?
Frezak (GM): Sort of.
Most daily powers have a miss:half damage thing on them so they're not totally wasted if you rolled poorly.
Kelly (GM): Huh.
WHOOOOO GAME STUFF.
Frezak (GM): Check yer token permissions, Gan-of-Gans.
Ganelon: All good.
Frezak (GM): brill.
Ganelon: Except you should probably stick to his first name so it doesn't cover too much space.
Frezak (GM): done;
Kelly (GM): How tall is the gravedigger?
Ganelon: Things worth knowing about R20:
Gigantic player name icons are annoying. Fix them by going to the top-right and clicking on the gear tab.
Frezak (GM): I'm... Whatever the higest I can be.
Kelly (GM): o_O
Ganelon: Set them to names only. In the same menu you can also give yourself a nickname in the campaign.
Frezak (GM): or just remove the names on tokens.
Actually.
Since we know who is who.
damn, that sliding looks so fancy.
Ganelon: How are you doing that?
Apheori (GM): What's the green number?
Frezak (GM): Action points.
Ganelon: Number of action points.
Frezak (GM): You gain 1 ever two encounters.
Apheori (GM): That are those? >.<
Can I hijack people's characters?
Frezak (GM): You can spend one a turn to get an extra standard action.
Yes, you can.
Ganelon: Probably.
Apheori (GM): Eeexcellent.
Radek: I AM OLD AND THE GRAVEDIGGER IS GREAT.
Ganelon: Yeah, there you go.
Radek: AND I SMELL LIKE POO.
I LIKE POSICLES.
Apheori (GM): >.<
Frezak (GM): That sort of thing.
Get awkward when you hikack by accident.
The Gravedigger hits Radek with a shovel.
Apheori (GM): So how do you do it intentionally properly?
Frezak (GM): Yeah.
Like that.
Apheori (GM): Like, I mean, without it being weird?
Frezak (GM): How do you do things intentionally? >.>
Apheori (GM): Maaagic.
Ganelon: You just use the slider below the chat to change who you're sending messages as.
THE EARTH IS HUNGRY
Apheori (GM): I mean, when would it be appropriate to do it?
Frezak (GM): Eh.
Ganelon: When you're speaking in-character, of course.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Frezak (GM): I'm gonna keep thinking that Radek is a dwarf.
Ganelon: I can't see other peoples' health bars, by the way.
Presumably they exist.
Frezak (GM): oh, right.
Apheori (GM): I can't see the goblin ones.
Ganelon: You probably should be able to, though the players shouldn't.
Frezak (GM): The goblins don't because they are minions.
Apheori (GM): Ah.
Neat!
Frezak (GM): For the monsters, red value is HP, green is bloodied value and blue number is XP (for when I was setting them up)
You see HP bars now, Gan?
Ganelon: Yeah.
Frezak (GM): delicious.
Okay, so when we run this.
Cover.
The rocks and deep foliage provide cover.
Apheori (GM): Cover?
Frezak (GM): Which is -2 to hit people behind it.
So Radek shooting the closest fire beetle would have -2 to hit.
Also, enemies provide cover for each other.
So here the goblin is providing cover for the archer.
Ganelon: The toolbar on the top left is pretty cool.
Apheori (GM): Where do I get backgrounds for the maps?
Ganelon: I typically use freehand to show how I'm moving.
Frezak (GM): Use the image search, or look for 'em yourself.
This is the Bandit Road.
Because bandits.
Ganelon: You could also do what I do and just draw them using the tools here.
Apheori (GM): Is there anywhere you might suggest looking?
Frezak (GM): >.>
Apheori (GM): For... like... oh, bugger.
Frezak (GM): You can always make them yerself.
Apheori (GM): I've never seen anything like what I'd want in my life.
Ganelon: I mean, the most I can really do with lines is draw walls and other things of notable import.
Apheori (GM): Don't have a tablet.
Ganelon: Oh, you don't need a tablet.
Frezak (GM): I don't mean draw.
I mean put tiles and things together.
Ganelon: Like, here.
Apheori (GM): ...tiles?
Frezak (GM): um
Apheori (GM): Oh.
Huh.
Ganelon: This is how I do it.
Frezak tends to have images for floors and stuff which he arranges instead.
Frezak (GM): BEAR SOUP GUY.
Apheori (GM): Greetings, bear soup guy.
Bear Soup Guy: Right
Ganelon: Either method works fine. Usually you're going to have to describe what the players are looking at no matter what.
Bear Soup Guy: Hello
Frezak (GM): You might want to kill flash.
Or disable video stuffs in the config.
Apheori (GM): Dammit, it WAS Atascht!
Ghaaaah.
Ganelon: Yes.
Go to the top right of the window.
Gear icon.
Scroll down until you get to the video part and set them to neither broadcast nor receive.
"Names Only" also helps.
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Bear Soup Guy: AGH IT WENT AWAY
Apheori (GM): So can you fit four people into a five-foot square room?
Frezak (GM): I don't think so.
Ganelon: No, 5 ft is one square here.
Frezak (GM): Unless they're squeezing?
Apheori (GM): But they fit just fine in reality.
Ganelon: 5ft is the space that a creature can at least choose to occupy.
And allies aren't supposed to sit on the same square. Plus it just makes things really hard to follow.
Frezak (GM): Mostly that.
Apheori (GM): But what if it's important?
What if everyone needs to fit in a closet?
Ganelon: Then we're probably not fighting.
And it's okay.
Frezak (GM): That.
Apheori (GM): Good point.
Ganelon: I'm not aiming a high tech rifle while sharing a 5ft space with three other people.
The Gravedigger: YOU WANT A POINT? I HAVE A SHOVEL. SORRY. IT'S ALL I HAVE.
Frezak (GM): My shovel would get in the way.
And I am not a small dude;
Apheori (GM): What is it, a snow shovel?
How small are you?
Tell me.
Frezak (GM): A dirt shovel.
Apheori (GM): Those have points.
Frezak (GM): About... 7ft?
You're thinking of spades.
Apheori (GM): Oh, that all?
Ganelon: Is that short for an elf?
Frezak (GM): A unagi or whatever I am. Unaci?
Apheori (GM): Not short, but not necessarily that tall, either.
Frezak (GM): I am very brawny.
Apheori (GM): I should figure out what those purple elves were.
Ganelon: I mean, Lhoryn's an abnormally large gnoll and he's 8'1".
Apheori (GM): There's a chance one of you is supposed to be purple.
Frezak (GM): I hope I'm not purple.
I'd look silly.
Apheori (GM): You might be.
Frezak (GM): *gasp*
Apheori (GM): But I don't think so.
I think those were... something else.
I don't know.
Ganelon: If you need someone to be purple, I can edit the image.
Apheori (GM): Point is the purple ones were 7' tall on average.
And they and others get taller.
But I don't know.
Things will be weird enough as it is.
Frezak (GM): What, are they all stick insects?
Apheori (GM): No, just large.
It's the large fat ones you need to watch out for.
Apheori (GM) hopes Gravy isn't one of those.
Frezak (GM): I'm not fat?
I work.
For a living.
Apheori (GM): Good.
Frezak (GM): With muscles.
And posing.
Apheori (GM): Hey, you could be fat and muscley. Some are. >.<
Frezak (GM): Artistic Ihumation.
*inhumation.
Apheori (GM): Well, anyhow, are you huge or not?
Frezak (GM): What's 'huge' ?
Apheori (GM): Although...
More than 8 feet tall.
Ganelon: http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/f/f5/Andre_in_the_late_%2780s.jpg
For reference, this is 7'4".
Frezak (GM): I'm a coke machine with limbs.
Apheori (GM): He's human.
Ganelon: And this guy weighed over 500 lb.
Apheori (GM): Pfft.
Frezak (GM): Andre the Giant!
The French dude.
Unless he was Corsican.
Ganelon: Yes, him.
Apheori (GM): Okay, it's unusual for elves, even uneca, to be over 8 feet tall.
Bear Soup Guy: Giants are, by definition, quite large!
Apheori (GM): They're probably largest.
Frezak (GM): NO SHIT.
Apheori (GM): The purple ones were probably a subspecies or something.
Bear Soup Guy: I'd just like to point out that my token looks super mystical and awesome
That is the end of that observation
Frezak (GM): Good.
Bear Soup Guy: :D
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Frezak (GM): I can always poke it if you want.
Ganelon: Radek looks suitably tired, though not of people's nonsense.
Frezak (GM): He will be.
He will be.
Ganelon: Oh, I'm sure, but the token looks more like typical old-man tiredness.
Apheori (GM): Gravy looks alarmingly like an uneca.
Frezak (GM): I'm actually using a Tiefling token.
Picture.
THing.
Apheori (GM): No wonder.
Frezak (GM): Have you read the chat log, Bear Soup Guy?
It has some rules that could be useful to know.
Apheori (GM): Oh gods rules...
Apheori (GM) cowers.
Ganelon: The slider below this chat box lets you speak as your character, for instance.
Bear Soup Guy: I did see that, that's pretty cool
Were there other important rules?
Ganelon: Probably.
Frezak (GM): Moving.
Actions.
THough I can recap if you want.
Opportunity Attacks.
Charging!
I will do a lot of charging.
Bear Soup Guy: Oh dear
I'll read the thing
The Gravedigger waves his shovel menacingly
The Gravedigger: COME AT ME BROS
the beetle remains unfazed.
The Gravedigger: COME FORTH AND BE BURIED.
Greibel: WOO MOVEMENT
Frezak (GM): I can actually make people come to be buried.
Greibel: Woah man, I just got a head change
It's crazy, bro.
Ganelon: So we're armed with handguns, right?
Frezak (GM): I will tape mine to my shovel.
Ganelon: I'm just making a note of it for inventory purposes, as always.
Bear Soup Guy: Are these attributes and abilities...accurate?
Ganelon: Most likely no.
Bear Soup Guy: Oh okay
Ganelon: Unless Frezak spent a long time setting them up for you.
Bear Soup Guy: Is my character sheet somewhere?
Ganelon: I'll have to send it to you.
Bear Soup Guy: Okay, thankie
Frezak (GM): Your HP and surges are accurate, as far as I know.
Ganelon: Yes, they should be.
Apheori (GM): How do you say things as non characters?
Ganelon: You're doing it right now.
Unless you mean as NPCs, in which case you need to make a character (as far as R20 is concerned) and put in their name.
As the DM you can speak as anyone, so just speak as that name and you're set.
Kobold Horde: Like us.
Bear Soup Guy: Woooo, scary
Kobold Horde: Totes.
Frezak (GM):
(To GM) rolling 1D8r+4+1D6
(
3
)
+4+
(
5
)
=
12
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D8r+4+1D6
(
5
)
+4+
(
6
)
=
15
Bear Soup Guy: Woohoo character sheet!
Ganelon: I recommend for the sake of your own convenience that you mess with the journal for your character here in R20.
You should be able to see mine, so go take a look at it and see what I've done.
It's a much more convenient way to track what you're lugging around, especially money.
To my understanding, right now we have nothing resembling currency.
Bear Soup Guy: Okie dokie
Ganelon: I wrote down stuff for ammunition but that's probably never going to be releveant.
Relevant, even.
So, are we going to explain combat or is this just setting R20 up today?
Bear Soup Guy: I guess everybody went to refill their magic...
Ganelon: Actually I'm testing something out. Let's see if it works.
[Weapon Attack - Rifle]
rolling 1d20+3+5+0
(
16
)
+3+5+0
=
24
Yeah, it works.
Bear Soup Guy: How do those work?
Ganelon: If you go edit your character in the journal you can make macros.
So I've added attributes (that are relevant to my attacks) and set up a macro to make those attack rolls using them.
Next I'm going to add ability rolls, assuming they hit.
So, stuff like the damage and automated descriptions of their effects.
Bear Soup Guy: Ah, right on
Ganelon: They're actually really easy to do.
Just gives you a box and everything you put in it comes out in the chat, so you can have it say something, roll dice, and use attributes as variables by hitting "@".
Bear Soup Guy: okie dokie
Ganelon: [Implement Attack]
rolling 1d20+5+0
(
1
)
+5+0
=
6
Bear Soup Guy: Sexy
Apheori (GM): Sorry, had to make a pie.
Ganelon: [Aggravating Force]
rolling 1d10+5+0
(
2
)
+5+0
=
7
The next ally to attack the target before EONT gains a +2 power bonus to the attack roll.
Apheori (GM): How did whoever it was have the world do something?
Ganelon: All working out quite nicely, yes.
Apheori (GM): It was like THE WORLD...
Ganelon: Try /desc.
Apheori (GM): Ghuh.
Oh, how cute... I named this thing 'holes' and we've got a guy who really likes digging holes...
Ganelon: [Thundering Armor]
Primary target gets a +1 power bonus to AC until EONT.
rolling 1d8+5+0
(
1
)
+5+0
=
6
Push the secondary target 1 square away from the primary target.
Apheori (GM): So I'm playing all the npcs? Is that how it works?
Ganelon: Yes. Both the ones who want us dead and the ones who do not.
Apheori (GM): Do npcs have to roll?
Ganelon: Out of combat? Rarely if ever.
In combat? As much as players.
Apheori (GM): Mmkay.
Ganelon: If you're having NPCs roll out of combat it's usually if they're trying to sneak past us or lie to us.
In which case, try /gmroll so that only you can see it.
Apheori (GM): Can I be lazy and just use dice?
Ganelon: Also totally acceptable, yes.
Apheori (GM): How do you use these?
Ganelon: What, roll on this site?
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d12
(
10
)
=
10
rolling 1d10
(
9
)
=
9
rolling 1d8
(
1
)
=
1
Whaaah.
Ganelon: You can just type /roll 1d12.
That also lets you add them together, ie: /roll 1d6+2d8+4.
rolling 1d6+2d8+4
(
5
)
+
(
2
+
8
)
+4
=
19
Apheori (GM): Ah.
rolling 1d6 +4 > 5
(
1
)
+4
=
5
So I think everyone's going to want you dead.
Do I need a reason why?
Ganelon: Not confident about your ability to play a wide host of characters?
Apheori (GM): Well...
Ganelon: [Ethereal Chill]
rolling 1d8+5+0
(
3
)
+5+0
=
8
Until EONT, any enemy that attacks the primary target takes 2 damage.
Apheori (GM): I'm not good with details.
Ganelon: [Thundering Armor]
Primary target gets a +1 power bonus to AC until EONT.
rolling 1d8+5+0
(
6
)
+5+0
=
11
Push the secondary target 1 square away from the primary target.
Whoops, that was accidental.
rolling 1d6 test
(
2
)
=
2
Ganelon: I can't help you there, I'm afraid.
Apheori (GM): Merp.
Ganelon: [Aggravating Force]
7 Force damage.
The next ally to attack the target before EONT gains a +2 power bonus to the attack roll.
Perfection.
23 Acid damage.
The target takes a -2 penalty to AC until EONT
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D10+0+0+4
(
8
)
+0+0+4
=
12
Melee 2. Pull 1
[Axe attack]
rolling 1D20+4+0+2
(
20
)
+4+0+2
=
26
[Roots Of Stone]
Burst 1.
Frezak (GM): Effect: Zone until EOYNT
Hit: /r 1D10+0+0+4 , targets leaving the zone are knocked prone and take 4
[Roots Of Stone]
Burst 1.
Effect: Zone until EOYNT
rolling 1D10+0+0+4 , targets leaving the zone are knocked prone and take 4
(
9
)
+0+0+4
=
13
Frezak (GM): [Roots Of Stone]
Burst 1.
Effect: Zone until EOYNT
rolling 1D10+0+0+4
(
10
)
+0+0+4
=
14
Targets leaving the zone are knocked prone and take 4
[Axe attack]
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+4+0+2+0
(
15
)
+4+0+2+0
=
21
[Mountain-Thunder-Attack]
Close burst 1.
rolling 1D10+0+0+4
(
6
)
+0+0+4
=
10
Miss: Half damage.
Effect: Each marked enemy takes 4
Frezak (GM): [Gore]
Charge Attack or Opportunity attack.
rolling 1D20+4+0+4
(
4
)
+4+0+4
=
12
Hit: /r 1D6+4 and target is prone.
[Gore]
Charge Attack or Opportunity attack.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+4+0+4
(
18
)
+4+0+4
=
26
Hit:
rolling 1D6+4
(
1
)
+4
=
5
and target is prone.
[Axe attack]
7
Frezak (GM): [Gore]
Charge Attack or Opportunity attack VS AC
19
Hit:
8
and target is prone.
Frezak (GM): [Strength of Stone]
#Axe-Attack
VS AC
13
Gain 4 THP.
[Strength of Stone]
Frezak (GM): #Axe-attack
VS AC
10
Gain 4 THP.
[Strength of Stone]
#{Axe-attack}
Frezak (GM): VS AC
12
Gain 4 THP.
[Strength of Stone]
#Axe attack
VS AC
Frezak (GM): 7
Gain 4 THP.
[Strength of Stone]
#Axe-attack
VS AC
12
Frezak (GM): Gain 4 THP.
[Strength of Stone]
#Axe
VS AC
14
Gain 4 THP.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1d20 + 0
(
14
)
+0
=
14
rolling 1d20 + 0
(
11
)
+0
=
11
4
rolling 1d20 + 3
(
12
)
+3
=
15
19
13
Frezak (GM): 17 for beetle
Apheori (GM): Giggly plank.
Frezak (GM): The Dreaded Giggly Plank of Tor Bibble.
Kobold Horde claps
Kobold Horde dances
Kobold Horde is so great
Gaurav V.:
rolling 1d20
(
6
)
=
6
Frezak (GM): That better not be initiative.
Rhu: Oooh, fancy.
Frezak (GM): The fances are ON.
Rhu: I'm just rolling out the low numbers so I only roll high numbers when the game starts.
Ganelon: Is Apheori here?
Frezak (GM): If the big rolls don't appear until the end I will be sad.
Apheori (GM): I need to send an email.
Sorry.
Gaurav V.: Looks like the gang's all here!
Frezak (GM): All five of us.
And the DM.
Apheori (GM): There are six?
Frezak (GM): Brünhilde, my best shovel.
Apheori (GM): I... see.
Frezak (GM): SO.
Apheori (GM): YES.
Frezak (GM): First things is initiatives.
If you have real dice then you can just use those for this bit. because DM.
A D20+ you initiative modifier. (usually your dex mod)
On the monster blocks, it's top left.
20
I just rolled 20.
Frezak (GM): Because I'm great.
Once you've rolled our init you can put it next to your name in the tracker.
The box thingy >.>
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+2
(
13
)
+2
=
15
Apheori (GM): So do I roll for each npc thingy?
Frezak (GM): yup
I have a macro for that, though.
Apheori (GM): How?
Tell me.
Frezak (GM): um
Apheori (GM): TELL ME.
...what's a macro?
Are those like those weird things you define in C?
Note: I DON'T KNOW WHAT THOSE ARE.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
7
)
=
7
Frezak (GM): THings >.>
16
Apheori (GM): ...yes?
Frezak (GM): 3
4
4
11
18
Apheori (GM): What about their initiatives?
Frezak (GM): That is their initiatives.
It' just not showing roll details.
So that player don't know what the initiative modifier is for each monster.
Apheori (GM): Don't the characters need to add their modifiers, though?
Frezak (GM): Yep.
Ganelon: Uh, you do know that I can just mouse over these inline rolls to see their equation, right?
Frezak (GM): I did not.
That is nice to know.
Apheori (GM): Odd. The only die I couldn't find was the d6.
Gaurav: You can type "/roll 1d6" to roll a die in the chat window.
Apheori (GM): Yes.
So it doesn't matter.
It's just ironic since that's the die that's all common everywhere else.
BEAR SOUP GUY.
Frezak (GM): BEAR SOUP GUY
Gaurav: I have a d6 in my Dice Roller popup thingie.
Frezak (GM): I think she means real dice?
Apheori (GM): Yes.
My d4 is missing a chunk out of one of the corners.
I probably shouldn't use it.
Gaurav: ... you're rolling actual die? That's hard core.
Frezak (GM): I often use real dice.
It's fancier.
Also.
BEAR SOUP GUYYYYY
Apheori (GM): And faster.
BEAR SOUP GUY.
Well, faster for simples.
Frezak (GM): Huh.
There are graves on this map.
Apheori (GM): Is your guy going to dig them deeper?
Gaurav: Graves. What about the elf in the tree? I wasn't expecting an elf in a tree.
Frezak (GM): I may have to exhume the bodies to check the craftsmanship.
He's in a bush.
Squatting.
Elfily.
Apheori (GM): Buggrit, I need tea.
Gaurav: You check the craftsmanship, I'll check for any valuables buried with them.
Frezak (GM): Go make some. We're still waiting on Bear Soup Guy.
Bear Soup Guy: Huh?
Sorry, I went outside
Frezak (GM): YOU'RE BACK
I WAS SO WORRIED
THAT YOU HAD BEEN TAKEN BY OWLS.
Bear Soup Guy: I HAD TO GO OUTSIDE TO MAKE BEAR SOUP
Frezak (GM): THAT IS TOTALLY COMPREHENSIBLE AND EXCUSABLE.
Now please roll initiative.
Bear Soup Guy: How do I do that?
Frezak (GM): "/r1D20+ your initiative modifier.
Bear Soup Guy: Okay
Apheori (GM): WHOOO I HAVE A D20.
Frezak (GM): SO DO I.
Bear Soup Guy: Apparently my initiative modifier is zero
Frezak (GM): MINE IS PRETTIER.
Apheori (GM): I just rolled a 1.
Frezak (GM): I can believe that.
Gaurav: My d20 is in Boulder :-/
Bear Soup Guy: Okay
Gaurav: It is also bright orange.
Apheori (GM): I've never used mine in a game.
Frezak (GM): Init is your dex mod usually.
Bear Soup Guy: Oh okay
Oh wait, but mine is Con because of Guardian isn't it?
Frezak (GM): Nope.
Ganelon: No, that's just for AC.
Bear Soup Guy: Oh okay, that's something else
Oh right
Frezak (GM): I SEE A WHORE.
Bear Soup Guy: Unrecognized command: /r1D20 + 11
Frezak (GM): space after the 'r'
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1D20 + 11
(
2
)
+11
=
13
You need a space.
Bear Soup Guy: AH
rolling 1D20+11
(
9
)
+11
=
20
Frezak (GM): +11?
Apheori (GM) smacks this thing for not recognising leading spaces.
Bear Soup Guy: WOOHOO
Frezak (GM): WHAT GAME ARE YOU PLAYING?
Bear Soup Guy: I am so lost
Dexterity is 11
Frezak (GM): Your dexterity modifier, not your dex.
The number to the right of it.
Bear Soup Guy: Oh the modifier
Okay, that's zero then
rolling 1D20+0
(
13
)
+0
=
13
Frezak (GM): Well, at least you beat Radek.
He's busy... snorting magic dust.
Or something.
Greibel: Hey, help a brother out with some of that dust.
Frezak (GM): IT BEGINS.
Also I begin.
Apheori (GM): Wait, so THAT's what the babylon 5 dust was?
...sorry.
Radek: Not on your life.
Greibel: So be it.
I'll just sit here with my bear soup
Frezak (GM): I will start with a move.
Ganelon: Frezak, your shovel is augmented.
Frezak (GM): It is?
Fuck yeah.
Ganelon: I say it is.
Frezak (GM): MAGIC SHOVEL, BITCHES.
Speed 6.
I think.
Ganelon: You know how that works, but I'll explain for these two.
One thing Radek can do between fights is augment weapons.
This means that when you attack with them, you can add +2 to the attack roll once, and then it stops being augmented.
So if you make a near-miss, you can turn that into a hit.
Greibel: Sexy
Frezak (GM): Free action to Mark anyone near me.
That means that they have -2 to attack people that are not me. And I can get a free poke at them if they try to.
Apheori (GM): So it's like a coating?
Ganelon: It's some kind of minor enhancement.
Frezak (GM): Little chained heart symbol to signify markage.
Ganelon: Likely magical.
Gaurav: ... did you just mark that bug with ... love?
Frezak (GM): I have marked his love.
With brambles.
Greibel: We're all one love man
Gaurav: haha
Frezak (GM): I will use Strength of Stone on him.
Ellemerr: I've a certain feeling this isn't the best time to be stalking. But screw that. Stalking!
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+6
(
4
)
+6
=
10
That... is a low number.
The bug has more AC than that.
So I have failed you guys.
Gaurav: The bug sniggers at you.
Frezak (GM): HAVE FUN WITH THE FIGHT GUYS.
Apheori (GM): The bug doesn't notice.
Frezak (GM): And, time for this goblin.
Apheori (GM): So I snigger at you.
SNIGGER.
Frezak (GM) is hurt.
Apheori (GM): Am I the goblin?
Frezak (GM): Emotionally.
You are the goblin.
Apheori (GM): What do I do?
(From Ellemerr): Out of curiosity, this should whisper the both of yeh?
Frezak (GM): You take a turn, like a player.
Standard action, move action, minor action.
Apheori (GM): Ellemerr: How do you whisper folks?
Ellemerr: Wit h/w
Apheori (GM): Yeah, but... what...
Ellemerr: And then a name
Frezak (GM): You can peek at the sheet to see what this dude can do.
WHich is very little.
Ellemerr: To whisper the gm(s), /w gm
Frezak (GM): He can poke or throw a javelin.
Ellemerr: To whisper me, /w Ellemerr
Apheori (GM): How do ranged distances work?
Frezak (GM): Range is number of squares.
If there are two ranges, like 10/20, means range 10 is normal, and anything from 11-20 has a -2 to hit. 21 is no-go.
Apheori (GM): So 10 is two squares?
Frezak (GM): 10 is 10 squares.
Apheori (GM): Oh.
Frezak (GM): Ya can use the ruler, too.
Ellemerr: But one square is... some lenght. Hell if I remember the number.
Apheori (GM): So I can have it try to kill Rhu?
Frezak (GM): You could.
Ellemerr: KILL EVERYTHING
Frezak (GM): And he can move first if you want to throw at Radek.
Gaurav: You can try.
Apheori (GM): And get rid of the rocks in the way? Or do we care about those?
Frezak (GM): Rocks provide cover if they interect an attack.
THat's -2 to hit.
So if you want to throw stuff at those squishy guys, you might want to move first.
Apheori (GM): So if the goblin is behind the rock, does that affect it, or just anything aiming for it.
Frezak (GM): OR YOU COULD COME AT ME.
Apheori (GM): ?
How do you USE cover?
Frezak (GM): You use cover just by having it in the way.
Apheori (GM): Why would a goblin go after you? You're huge.
But you can't shoot from behind it?
Frezak (GM): Sure you can.
oh, I see.
(From Ellemerr): Never mind what I said about having gone throught this. I forgot you were learning to DM. *shifty eyes* BUT I'M CONFIDENT YOU CAN STILL LEARN IT! Yeah.
Frezak (GM): Well, presumably if you're right up against it when you shoot, it wouldn't hinder you.
(To Ellemerr): SEEEEE?
Apheori (GM): Oh.
Frezak (GM): I'm not an expert on cover rules >.>
Just make it up.
(From Ellemerr): *cackles*
Apheori (GM): I need more of a frame of reference. I'm like Coraline-lost, here. I've already gone beyond Fern-lost.
Okay, so move the thing and attack?
I CAN DO THIS.
Gaurav: Yup! You get three actions: a standard, a minor and a move. You can do them in any order. So you can move first, then attack, then a minor. I think.
Frezak (GM): yup
Apheori (GM): What's a minor?
Frezak (GM): Monsters usually don't have powers that use Minors.
Apheori (GM): Ah.
So the things are listed as 'minor'?
Frezak (GM): Otherwise it' stuff like pulling out a weapno, picking something up, opening a door.
Ellemerr: Yes.
Apheori (GM): Ah.
How do you move things?
Just drag them?
Frezak (GM): yep
Ellemerr: If you had a cleric, your heals might be minors. Unless that's just me. I'm pretty clueless.
Frezak (GM): All Leaders have their healing thing as a Minor.
Apheori (GM): What do I add together to attack?
Frezak (GM): Look at the power.
In this case javelin is +6.
Apheori (GM): Whazzat mean? +6 vs AC?
Frezak (GM): Means it's a D20+6, and if the roll is equal to or higher than the target's AC, you hit.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 + 6
(
11
)
+6
=
17
What's his AC?
Frezak (GM): So now your target tells you >.>
Unless you have player sheets at hand.
Gaurav: Who did you attack?
Apheori (GM): I probably should but I don't.
Radek.
Ganelon: Oh, then it just barely hits.
If you tie with someone's defenses, it's a hit.
Apheori (GM): So it hit. Now what?
Ganelon: Tell me how much damage I'm taking.
Ellemerr: Could someone be so kind as to provide the stalker with a quick who's-who? :3 The stalker would much apreciate it!
Ganelon: I'm playing Radek.
Apheori (GM): How do I know how much damage he's taking?
Gaurav: I'm Rhu. Bear Soup Guy is Greibel.
Ellemerr: You roll for damages. Probably.
Apheori (GM): It says 4 damage.
Ellemerr: Thanksies.
Apheori (GM): What does that mean?
You take 4 damage?
Frezak (GM): That means it's a straight 4.
Most minions don't roll for damage.
They just do shit damage.
Apheori (GM): Whooo I hit a player character!
Ellemerr applauds Apheori!
Rhu stands stock-still as a javelin whooshes past him.
Ellemerr: Go you!
Apheori (GM): Should I... er...
Apheori (GM) pokes it.
Apheori (GM): It didn't hit?
Ganelon: It did.
Apheori (GM): Oh, right.
I'm mixing you up.
Gaurav: It whooshed past Rhu to hit Radek.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
So if you took damage... how...
Ganelon: Also, Frezak, I can't see Rhu's health.
Apheori (GM) gestures vaguely.
Ganelon: I can subtract it myself.
Frezak (GM): Yarr.
Apheori (GM): Good.
Ganelon: You'll have to do the same if I hit something.
Apheori (GM): You'll have to tell me how.
Ellemerr: You click their health blob and type in either the new value or the -whatever
So -4 in this case.
Ganelon: Doesn't apply to minions. They just die if you hit them.
Apheori (GM): Okay, so now what?
Elf?
Gaurav: Elf!
Frezak (GM): Now it's the elf's turn.
The shooty one.
Apheori (GM): AAAAGH TRIANGLE MATH.
Frezak (GM): Shh.
Trust the magic colour line.
Apheori (GM): Agh.
Gaurav: What is the elf's speed?
Apheori (GM): Normal.
Most things are normal.
Except things that AREN't.
Gaurav: I think that's ... 6 squares or something? He could run up to the next bush along and shot Gravy. For all the good that'd do him.
Apheori (GM): Actually...
Apheori (GM) grins.
Frezak (GM): The elf gets +2 to his attack rolls if he moves.
Gaurav: uh oh
Apheori (GM): And I've decided it's going after your guy. Congratulations!
Frezak (GM): Whose guy?
Apheori (GM): The one who gave me the idea.
Frezak (GM): AWESOME.
GO SHOOT HIM.
Gaurav gulps
Frezak (GM): He has 20/40 range. He can hit anybody.
Apheori (GM): So that's /r 1d20 + 2 + 7?
Frezak (GM): yup
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 + 2 + 7
(
6
)
+2+7
=
15
I was hoping it'd actually do it inline. >.<
Gaurav: Is that against AC?
Frezak (GM): Ya'll usually want to mention the defence it targets when rolling.
Apheori (GM): Oh. Yes.
Ellemerr: Whelp, more pie. I may or may not return at some point. Have fun either way! /me stalks off
Rhu: The arrow pings harmlessly off Rhu's armor (AC 16)
Frezak (GM): Yay for Rhu.
Apheori (GM): Rhu isn't wearing armour.
Rhu: He's wearing cloth armor
Frezak (GM): Pings off his hair?
Apheori (GM): ...sure.
Rhu: I get a +3 from my faith alone.
RHU IS UP
The Gravedigger: BURY THEM
Apheori (GM): Anyway, cloth armour isn't armour. Sorry, but NO.
Unless it's really heavy cloth or something.
Bear Soup Guy: What if it's kevlar?
Apheori (GM): Hmm, good point.
Frezak (GM): That would be more like Hide Armour.
Rhu: Your kind have infested these forests long enough. Prepare to die!
Apheori (GM): These people WOULD have cloth armour.
Frezak (GM): I'm wearing a flak vest.
Apheori (GM): And it'd stop bullets.
The cloth.
Like those things in stargate...
Rhu: I fire off a bond of retribution at the kobold closest to me.
Apheori (GM): It's a goblin.
Frezak (GM): Ac is your ability to dodge as much as it is physical armour.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20 + 4 vs AC
(
15
)
+4
=
19
Frezak (GM): Clearly a goblin, man.
Rhu: Vermin are vermin.
Apheori (GM): Okay, so you hit it. What does that do?
Rhu: Yay!
Frezak (GM): Since he's a minion, he dies.
Rhu: Oh?
Apheori (GM): Oh, right.
Rhu: Shoot. I was hoping to do some more math and whatnot.
Apheori (GM): How
'd you do that?
Oh.
Frezak (GM): THe right-hand white blob popup on token selectin.
Apheori (GM): Right.
Rhu: Okay, this power has another effect: the first time any enemy who is not my target hits me before the end of my next turn, he takes +2 radiant damage.
better not hit me, guys
Frezak (GM): That's cool.
Apheori (GM): They don't know that.
Rhu: oops
Frezak (GM): Correct.
Rhu: so how do I give up turn order?
Frezak (GM): HEY GOBLINS
Greibel: Now they know!
You fool!
Frezak (GM): IF YOU HIT ME YOU DIE.
Just say your done.
Rhu: I am done.
Frezak (GM): And a GM can advance the order.
Greibel: Okay
Let's do this!
Bear Soup Guy: How do I let's do this?
Frezak (GM): WHich do are you trying to do?
Bear Soup Guy: Which do should I do?
I have like, cool ranged stuff
And a staff for hitting
And I can be a bear
Frezak (GM): Look at your powers.
Bear Soup Guy: I WILL USE THORN WHIP
Rhu: Tactically, you could run up through us and attack the goblins ahead of us, or you could hang back and range-attack them forcing them to attack me or Gravy, which would be a very bad idea for them. All except that stupid elf.
Frezak (GM): Whip them thorns.
I'll stay here and attract dudes.
You go take out the archer.
Rhu: Re: the armour debate -- the cloth armour only gives me +1 AC, which really just means it gets in the way a bit. Most of my armour comes from an Avenger class benefit "Armor of Faith", which gives me +3 AC as long as I'm wearing light or no armour.
Ganelon: Cloth armor actually provides no protection.
Frezak (GM): Dude. Can you Fire Hawk the archer?
Ganelon: Yes. That.
Frezak (GM): Because then if he tries to shoot again he'll get hawked.
In a fiery way.
Bear Soup Guy: How do I...okay
How do I aim a thing at a guy?
Frezak (GM): Ya just say so.
But you'll need to get within 10 of him.
brb
Bear Soup Guy: Okay, well there's a goblin on the right
Under the bug
And I will thorn whip him
Apheori (GM): You can move before fire hawking.
As part of the turn.
Bear Soup Guy: I can also do that, right!
How many spaces can I move?
Apheori (GM): Uh...
Ganelon: 6.
Rhu: It's your "speed" on your character sheet.
Bear Soup Guy: Oh right, the speed
Okie dokie
Apheori (GM): Right. >.<
Ganelon: It might be 5 because of your armor.
Diagonal movement costs the same.
Apheori (GM): I want to use total annihilation maps. Will anyone care?
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1D8 + 4
(
7
)
+4
=
11
Okay, I did that to the archer
Rhu: hang on
Bear Soup Guy: And also it pulls him two squares
Rhu: your attack roll is always 1d20 + (something)
Greibel: GET OVER HERE
Bear Soup Guy: Oh
Rhu: I think? Greibel? I'm pretty sure you can't do an attack roll with a 1d8.
Apheori (GM): Ghuh, what's the skill description?
Bear Soup Guy: There's nothing on my character sheet that says 1d20
Apheori (GM): It probably says +4 vs something.
So it's 1d20+4 to see if it works?
I think.
Bear Soup Guy: Oh, 4 vs Fort
Apheori (GM): Remember, I don't know what I'm talking about.
Frezak (GM): DONT LET THEM SEE YOU'RE AFRAID.
Apheori (GM): Don'tletthemseeyou'reafraid.
Rhu: Frezak: "4 vs Fort" means "1d20 + 4 vs Fort", right?
Frezak (GM): yup
Apheori (GM): How do saves work?
Bear Soup Guy: Okay
And that's vs the opponent's fort then
Frezak (GM): Saves are: if you are under an effect that says 'save ends', then you roll a D20 at the end of your turn. 10 or higher, and you're cured.
Apheori (GM): This... is different from previous editions, isn't it?
Frezak (GM): Yes, opponent's fort.
Correct, Names.
Bear Soup Guy: Okay
Apheori (GM): Errrngh.
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20+4
(
17
)
+4
=
21
Frezak (GM): Before you had to make a defensive roll in reaction to someone casting against you.
Bear Soup Guy: ^ vs Fort
Of the archer
Apheori (GM): So now what?
Frezak (GM): You check the Archer's Fortitude.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
What do I do with it?
Bear Soup Guy: If it's lower than 21 I hit
Right?
Frezak (GM): If the number he rolled is equal or higher, you tell him it hit.
Apheori (GM): You hit.
Right?
Bear Soup Guy: Awesome
Rhu: Woohoo!
Frezak (GM): ANd he tells you what happens.
Apheori (GM): Right.
What happens?
Bear Soup Guy: Okay!
HERE IS WHAT HAPPENS
rolling 1d8 + 4
(
3
)
+4
=
7
That is the attack
And it also pulls him two squares
Frezak (GM): So. Bear Soup Guy indicates what square teh elf ends in.
He can move it 2 squares towards him.
Bear Soup Guy: Right
That one
The two diagonals
Close enough
Apheori (GM): >.<
What's the 7?
Bear Soup Guy: Damage?
Frezak (GM): If you're using the hand tool, hold left-click to ping a square.
Bear Soup Guy: Oh, sexy
=D
So once more
Greibel: GET OVER HERE
Apheori (GM): How did it get pulled, anyhow?
Frezak (GM): Magic?
Bear Soup Guy: Because I hit him with thorns
And the thorns are on vines
And the vines pulled him
Because I'M ONE WITH NATURE
Apheori (GM): Scary range.
Bear Soup Guy: Indeed
Apheori (GM): With vines.
You doing anything else?
Bear Soup Guy: What else can I do besides moving and attacking?
Apheori (GM): No idea.
Rhu: That is a very cool attack.
Bear Soup Guy: I know, isn't it?
Rhu: You get one minor action. Check to see if you have any.
Bear Soup Guy: Okay
Frezak (GM): You can change into an animal as a minor I think.
Bear Soup Guy: That appears to be correct
I think I'll stay and Elf for now though
Greibel: I HAVE COMPLETED MY THING
Apheori (GM): Okay, goblin throws a javelin over the rock at Rhu.
Rhu: WHAT
This happens too often.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 +6 vs ac
(
10
)
+6
=
16
Ganelon: Becoming desensitized to the complaints of your players is also an important part of being a DM.
Apheori (GM): I think it hits, does 4 damage, and dies.
Am I wrong?
Rhu: Yes, yes and yes.
Apheori (GM) grins and Gan.
Apheori (GM): At.
RADEK!
Frezak (GM): DO SOME MAGIC.
Can you move this beetle? Or lock out his oppie?
Because i'd love to get up on the archer.
Ganelon: I can.
Alright, I'll move into this bush first.
Thundering Armor on the Gravekeeper.
Frezak (GM): Skinny old guy in a bush.
WHO'S THE DRUID NOW.
Digger.
Bear Soup Guy: Do bushes provide cover?
Frezak (GM): Call me gravy.
Bear Soup Guy: heh heh heh
OH DOORBELL
Ganelon: [Implement Attack]
rolling 1d20+5+0
(
19
)
+5+0
=
24
[Thundering Armor]
Primary target gets a +1 power bonus to AC until EONT.
13 Thunder damage.
Push the secondary target 1 square away from the primary target.
Frezak (GM): fuck yeah
Rhu: Damn.
Radek cackles wildly.
The Gravedigger: THUNNNDER POWEERRRRRR
Apheori (GM): Sorry, had to get lunch.
What's going on?
Bear Soup Guy: I have to go fix my idiot neighbor's stupid wireless card
Frezak (GM): Radek did magic.
Bear Soup Guy: So I might not be back because I have to do other stuff today too
Frezak (GM): gah
Bear Soup Guy: But I found this extremely cool and educational and I got to lasso an archer
Apheori (GM): >.<
Ganelon: Well.
Apheori (GM): Well, this was progress.
Bear Soup Guy: It sure was
Ganelon: Even if we're stopping, Apheori, could you please push that beetle next to the Gravedigger down a square and deal the damage?
Frezak (GM): If Gan has Greibel's sheet, we can carry on? >.>
Bear Soup Guy: heh heh
Ganelon: I could do that.
Bear Soup Guy: Well if we're going another round of turns I might be back for that
Apheori (GM): We also need to figure out when to meet next.
Bear Soup Guy: Actually no, it's 11:30 so I have to shower and stuff
Next Friday?
Rhu: This is definitely progress.
Apheori (GM): No sooner?
Bear Soup Guy: I could probably do sooner
Ganelon: I certainly could.
Frezak (GM): I have no life, so I can do whenever.
Bear Soup Guy: Okay, I have to go, so Isarra you can tell me later what day, or we can talk about this later tonight or tomorrow or something
Apheori (GM): Let's do monday!
YOU'RE ALL MINE!
Rhu: What day is today?
Bear Soup Guy: Okay let's do monday then XD
Today is Saturday
Gaurav: Then I can do Monday.
Bear Soup Guy: Yeah I guess I can do Monday too
And then actually that's better because I just remembered I have Christmas stuff for like a solid week after that
Gaurav: I'm out of town Wednesday through next Monday, so I won't be able to D&D then. But please go on without me! I'll get back in when I can.
Apheori (GM): Frezak: Did you attack that thing?
Bear Soup Guy: OKAY BYE GUYS
Frezak (GM): Radek did.
Apheori (GM): BYE,
.
Frezak (GM): I was resolving the effects.
Apheori (GM): Ah.
Frezak (GM): BYE BEAR SOUP GUY
Gaurav: Good night everybody!
Ganelon: Put a "+1 AC" icon on yourself too, Frezak.
Apheori (GM): Cool.
Frezak (GM): You're going too, Rave?
Gaurav: I dunno.
Frezak (GM): >.>
Gaurav: I'm planning htings with my sister.
I can linger.
Let's play through to the end of the encounter?
Apheori (GM): Or at least the round.
>.>
Frezak (GM): I WANT TO HIT SOMETHING.
Gaurav: Or until someone dies.
GET THAT ELF
Frezak (GM): I WANT TO.
So, the beetle has a close blast 3 power.
Apheori (GM): Ah.
Dammit.
Frezak (GM): That means it can attack a 3X3 grid touching it.
Apheori (GM): This chat thing is awful.
What's clost blast?
Is that what colour spray was?
close
Gaurav: "close blast" = blast centered on the character itself of the radius indicated.
Apheori (GM): But what does it mean?
Ah.
Gaurav: brb afk 5mins. Sorry!
there's also "close burst", which points in a particular direction. Or is it the other way around?
Frezak (GM): other way :P
Apheori (GM): So it could hit that square?
Or what?
Frezak (GM): as long as the 3X3 grid is touching the casting token.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Okay, so that on Gravy...
Frezak (GM): Awesome.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 + 4 vs reflex...
(
2
)
+4
=
6
Snrk.
Frezak (GM): I deflect it with my shovel.
The Gravedigger: YOUR FIRE WILL NOT SPARE YOU YOUR GRAVE
Apheori (GM): What's your reflex save? Now I'm curious.
Frezak (GM): I have... 13 reflex.
Apheori (GM): Ah.
Can it still scuttle away?
Frezak (GM): sure.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Cutter.
Frezak (GM): dead cutter.
Apheori (GM): Dead.
Dammit.
I try to chat, but the turn thing is still selectedso it switches turns.
Frezak (GM): >.>
so what does the other bug do?
Apheori (GM): Attacks!
Frezak (GM): EAT RHU.
I bet he's delicious.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 + 4 vs reflex on Rhu
(
19
)
+4
=
23
Frezak (GM): that looks like a hit.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 3d6
(
4
+
4
+
1
)
=
9
For 9 damage.
Frezak (GM): He's not here, so you can take the 9 off.
Apheori (GM): Does he have that retribution thing still?
...whatever it was.
Frezak (GM): It's once a turn.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Oh, right.
Frezak (GM): And he's at half HP, so bloodied.
I'll use the red dot for that.
Apheori (GM): What's the significance of that for him?
Frezak (GM): I don't think it does, for him.
Actually, I don't think any of us have special bloodied things.
Apheori (GM): Okay. So it's just a dot and might affect attackers' responses?
Frezak (GM): Correct.
Did it move?
Apheori (GM): What?
Frezak (GM): Did the bug move?
Apheori (GM): Oh, yes.
Frezak (GM): I can't recall.
My turn, then?
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Frezak (GM): So, gan.
Bug or archer?
Gan?
Are there only 2 of 5 people here?
Apheori (GM): >.<
Frezak (GM): Bah.
I'll go and mooove.
and cast my Roots of Stone encounter power.
Apheori (GM): Whazzat?
Ganelon: Hm.
Frezak (GM): CLose burst 1 means I hit anyone touching me.
One attack roll per target, so i'll start with the archer first, and then the goblin.
rolling 1D20+6
(
19
)
+6
=
25
rolling 1D20+6
(
8
)
+6
=
14
Against AC.
Apheori (GM): Hits both.
Frezak (GM): Awesome.
So.
[Roots Of Stone]
Burst 1 Vs AC
Effect: Zone until EOYNT
13
Frezak (GM): Targets leaving the zone are knocked prone and take 4
And I'll Mark the archer dude.
Apheori (GM): What's EOYNT?
Frezak (GM): So they both take 13, and if they leave that zone before the end of my next turn, they're knocked prone.
End Of Your Next Turn.
Apheori (GM): Ah.
Frezak (GM): Means archer dude is fucked.
Apheori (GM): Aww/
.
Frezak (GM): And he's marked.
Apheori (GM): With love.
Frezak (GM): And my turn is over;
Gaurav: Is the archer dead yet?
Frezak (GM): His love is MINE.
Nah.
Apheori (GM): Dammit.
Frezak (GM): Bloodied, though.
Apheori (GM): Stupid turns.
Oh, right.
Gaurav: As indeed am I :-/
Luckily I've go just the power for that
once the Elf does his thang
do Elves thang?
Ganelon: I can fix that for you, too.
Frezak (GM): At the very least, bloodied monsters indicate that you've been hurting them.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 + 7 vs ac on rhu
(
15
)
+7
=
22
Gaurav: eeks
Frezak (GM): Wait.
he's marked.
Rhu: Son of a ...
Frezak (GM): SO I get an interrupt.
Apheori (GM): So you hit him, yes?
Frezak (GM): I get the attack BEFORE his finishes rollng.
Apheori (GM): Or what?
Explain.
Okay.
Frezak (GM): Soo
rolling 1D20+8 vs AC
(
5
)
+8
=
13
Apheori (GM): Miss.
Frezak (GM): bah
Wait.
Gan?
I have that magic thing?
A +2 after a roll or something?
Apheori (GM): What does it do?
Frezak (GM): Not sure. Some Artificer thing.
Ganelon: Yes.
You have it.
Frezak (GM): I'll spend that, then.
To add +2 to that roll?
Ganelon: Yes.
Frezak (GM): 15 AC?
Apheori (GM): You can choose NOT to spend that? o_O
Okay, roll for damage.
Right?
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D6+4
(
1
)
+4
=
5
And he is knocked prone.
Ganelon: The way it works is that he can choose to make one attack roll with a specific weapon/implement 2 higher whenever he likes.
Apheori (GM): That makes no sense.
Frezak (GM): It's a magic backswing power.
Ganelon: It's magic weapon augmentation.
Rhu: Is that only once an encounter?
Or can he use the +2 any time he likes?
Frezak (GM): Is this symbol the one we use for prone?
Ganelon: I pick the weapon that gets augmented in-between fights and can only do it at the start of a day and once more every two fights.
So at the end of this one, I won't be able to use it on anyone's weapons, but after the next fight I could.
Yes, it is.
Apheori (GM): Do you see a better one?
Frezak (GM): Okay, so being prone is -2 to attacks. Being marked is -2 to attacks that do not include me.
Gaurav: The half-heart might be a better "bloodied" icon than the red dot.
I'm not sure what the unhappy egg represents but it can't be any good.
Apheori (GM): The red dot is pretty clear.
Frezak (GM): Does... 18 still hit?
Apheori (GM): In that I figured it out.
Frezak (GM): Rhu?
Gaurav: Oh yeah
my AC is only 16
Frezak (GM): I TRIED, MAN.
Rhu: you did good, Gravy. you did good.
Rhu closes his eyes and waits for the arrow to hit
Frezak (GM): I just smacked him with my head, actually.
Apheori (GM): WHOO IT STILL HIT HIM!
The Gravedigger: YOU GRAVE WILL BE POORLY DECORATED
Apheori (GM): Rhu, you idiot, you tried to dodge; you just weren't fast enough.
Grr.
GRR.
VENGEANCE!
Rhu: How much damage did that do?
Apheori (GM): Er, right.
Do the prone/marked things affect damage, or just hitting?
Ganelon: Hitting.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d10 +4
(
10
)
+4
=
14
Rhu: Gurk.
Apheori (GM): You're dead!
Or something.
Rhu: I forget how the death rules work.
Apheori (GM): Well, not quite, but...
Same.
Frezak (GM): oh dear
Rhu: I think I'm unconscious first? Or something?
Frezak (GM): Yeah.
At the beginning of your next turn, roll D20.
20 lets you spend a surge and get back up.
1-9 is a strike.
3 strikes and you are really dead.
Rhu: Sweet.
Rhu crumples to the floor.
Rhu crumples to the forest floor.
Apheori (GM): Is it possible to finish them off?
The Gravedigger: MORE BODIES TO BURY.
Frezak (GM): Yes.
Apheori (GM): How?
Frezak (GM): You can walk up and poke him.
Rhu: o.0
Frezak (GM): Coup De Grace, since he's unconcious.
It's...
Apheori (GM): ACABA CON ELLOS!
Frezak (GM): +5 to hit from being unconcious, attack deals max damage.
Apheori (GM): Ajem.
Ganelon: They also fall prone, of course.
Frezak (GM): If he hits negative bloodied value, he also dies.
Gaurav: Running with ... what?
My bloodied is 13, so I'm dead when my HP hits -13
exciting times
Frezak (GM): Yep.
Gorram elves, am I right?
So does the archer do anything else?
Rhu: "Gorram elves", Rhu mutters weakly.
Apheori (GM): What else can it do?
Rhu: standard, minor, move
Frezak (GM): Stand up?
Rhu: oooh
Apheori (GM): Oh, good point.
Gaurav: right
Frezak (GM): And then quake.
Rhu: "You ... show him, Gravy ..."
Rhu tries to pull himself up on the rock next to him, but falls over.
Apheori (GM): So the elf gets up...
"Pathetic," the elf mutters.
The Gravedigger: Get back down. Your grave awaits.
Frezak (GM): So is he done,
*?
Apheori (GM): Right.
RHU.
ROLL.
Gaurav: DEATH SAVE TIME.
Frezak (GM): DEATH SAAAAVE
Rhu: 1d20
Frezak (GM): SAVE FOR DEAAATH
Rhu:
rolling 1d20
(
10
)
=
10
Frezak (GM): Could be worse.
Rhu: So no strikes, but I stay dying and unconscious?
Frezak (GM): yup.
radek will get you back up, though.
Rhu breathes into the grass turning red with his blood.
Frezak (GM): Ew.
Apheori (GM): Sounds like something out of Twilight.
Gaurav: I'm dying, give me a break.
Frezak (GM): If you sparkle I'm cutting off your head my next turn.
Apheori (GM): Now you just need to add some self-deprecating introspection...
And flowery descriptions of your true love.
Who is probably Gravy.
Apheori (GM) runs.
Rhu is dying, unconscious, struggling to hold onto life, but by all that is holy he is NOT sparkling.
Frezak (GM): "She was sweet, like this grass. But like the grass, she is soiled by my tainted blood. Oh, woe."
Ganelon: Right then.
Gaurav: Gravy? The guy who keeps advising him that if he lies flat the rigor mortis will be much easier to deal with when fitting him for a coffin?
Ganelon: I can't actually move Greibel but if I'm in charge of his actions...
Frezak (GM): just point.
Ganelon: Call Forth the Spirit Pack.
Frezak (GM): dat pack.
Ganelon: Beetle, then elf.
rolling 1d20+4
(
2
)
+4
=
6
rolling 1d20+4
(
7
)
+4
=
11
Frezak (GM): What.
Did you just blow his Red?
Ganelon shrugs.
Ganelon: Evidently.
Apheori (GM): What does this mean?
Frezak (GM): Means he rolls bad.
What's it against?
Ganelon: It's a once-per-fight power.
Reflex.
Frezak (GM): gah.
Welp.
Apheori (GM): So same roll for both, or what?
Frezak (GM): One attack roll per target, single damage roll.
But he whiffed both.
Apheori (GM): Ah.
Frezak (GM): So is that it for Greibel?
Ganelon: Yes.
Apheori (GM): Is that elf wearing leaves?
Frezak (GM): Possibly.
Apheori (GM): Snrk.
Frezak (GM): He really likes leaves.
Apheori (GM): Triangle math is the worst.
Frezak (GM): So when the bugs go, roll a D6 to see if their fire recharges.
Ganelon: First things first. I toss a syringe at Rhu.
Frezak (GM): Throwing-dart syle?
Rhu: (Does that mean I get to spent a healing surge?)
hahahahaha
Rhu the syringe embeds itself into Rhu's face
Ganelon: Yes.
Set your HP to 0.
Then add your healing surge value +2.
Frezak (GM): The adventures of Rhu the Syring.
Ganelon: Don't spend a surge to do this.
You just get HP.
Frezak (GM): Badass.
Ganelon: You are no longer unconscious or dying.
You're still prone and bloody.
Rhu: Guys it was a syringe named Rhu. What are the odds?
Frezak (GM): FATE.
Rhu: Aye. Thanks a million!
The syringe literally had my name on it.
Frezak (GM): >.>
Radek: Well, of course it did.
A little customization never hurt anyone.
Except for elves.
Apheori (GM): I'll be sure to try to prove that wrong.
...wait, you are elves.
Nevermind.
Ganelon: Alright, that was my minor action..
I think I'll take aim at the beetle.
[Weapon Attack - Rifle]
rolling 1d20+3+5+0
(
7
)
+3+5+0
=
15
What's its AC?
Frezak (GM): low
Apheori (GM): Hits.
Ganelon: [Scouring Weapon]
13 Acid damage.
The target takes a -2 penalty to AC until EONT
Frezak (GM): nice
Apheori (GM): Which beetle?
Ganelon: Put a thing on it to indicate that its AC is lowered.
Frezak (GM): UNderbarrel acid grenade launcher?
Ganelon: I'm thinking hollow ceramic bullets.
Frezak (GM): Fancy.
Ganelon: And I'll convert my move action into a minor and use it to reload.
That ends my turn.
Apheori (GM): Okay. Explain the recharge.
For the beetles.
Frezak (GM): Beginning of your turn.
Roll a D6.
Apheori (GM): Yes.
rolling 1d6
(
4
)
=
4
Frezak (GM): 5 or 6 recharges the power and makes it ready to use.
Apheori (GM): Hey, this thing can get to Rhu?
HOW?
AGH TRIANGLE MATH.
Rhu: Technically, it's the beetle further away from me whose turn it is now.
Apheori (GM): And it's IN RANGE.
Frezak (GM): yeah, she just measured the distance.
Rhu mutters, "goodbye, cruel world" under my breath.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d10 + 4
(
8
)
+4
=
12
rolling 1d20 + 4
(
6
)
+4
=
10
Rhu: vs AC?
Apheori (GM): Helps if I roll the right die.
What's the bonus attacking a prone?
Frezak (GM): +2.
Ganelon: 2.
Apheori (GM): Okay, you survive... FOR NOW.
Rhu will take what he can get as the fire beetle's attack narrowly missed him.
Rhu: misses* etc.
Apheori (GM): Okay, no recharge on that one either, so it goes to try to bite Rhu as well.
...
Frezak (GM): what did you do?
Apheori (GM): I accidentally deleted it because the chat thing wasn't selected again, didn't I?
Rhu glares at the beetle until it vanishes into thin air.
Frezak (GM): Ctr-Z ?
DAMN DUDE.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 + 4 + 2
(
9
)
+4+2
=
15
Rhu: hang on
do I get an attack of opportunity as it moves from the stone to right next to me?
Frezak (GM): I tihnk so.
Apheori (GM): How?
He's flat on the ground and it came at him from behind a rock.
Frezak (GM): It moved out of an adjacent square.
Rhu: If an enemy moves from one square next to you to another square next to you, you get an attack of opportunity.
Apheori (GM): It had a rock.
Rhu: You could just have the beetle stop on the rock. Then I don't get it.
Frezak (GM): If it can walk over the rock, then he can see it.
Rhu: It came over the rock, and I whacked it as soon as I saw its head.
Apheori (GM): It went around the rock. >.<
Frezak (GM): right >.>
No, that's fine.
SORRY DUDE.
Rhu: okay, yeah, that works. continue!
Apheori (GM): aSDHFj
This chat thing is horrible.
Like... awful.
You can't even click on the chat thing in general, no, it has to be the specific box...
There don't seem to be any standard hotkeys to trigger it either...
Sorry.
Rhu: So that was 15 vs AC including +2 for being prone, right? Or do you want to reroll?
Apheori (GM): I should be moving each... er... square. Yes.
Yeah, I think that was it. Did it miss too?
Rhu: Yup. 16 AC.
Frezak (GM): wow.
Rhu phew
Frezak (GM): You have lucks.
Rhu: As many lucks as one can have when surrounded by a goblin corpse and two angry fire beetles, yes.
Frezak (GM): Right.
I'll smack this dude.
rolling 1D20+6
(
19
)
+6
=
25
Rhu: Could one of the GMs give the other fire beetle its initiative of 3 again? I suspect we'll still be playing.
woooooooo
righteous smack
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D10+4
(
4
)
+4
=
8
And I gain 4 temporary HP.
Rhu: YES
YES
Frezak (GM): YEAAAHHH
Rhu kicks my feet about in a celebratory fashion
Frezak (GM): Then I will move.
And take the opportunity attack.
So roll that bite.
Apheori (GM): Opportunity attack?
Frezak (GM): He gets a free bite as I walk around him.
Apheori (GM): Oh.
How does that work?
Frezak (GM): Just make a bite attack.
Apheori (GM): Oh, I got that wrong before. It's +5.
Off.
Odd.
Rhu: If you move from one square adjacent to a character to another square also adjacent to the character, the character gets to interrupt your move and make an attack.
Apheori (GM): 22 vs what?
Frezak (GM): 22? What?
Apheori (GM): I rolled a 17 and added 5.
Sorry, lazy die.
I'm lazy.
Frezak (GM): says AC on the box, so AC.
That hits.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 2d4 + 2
(
2
+
3
)
+2
=
7
Frezak (GM): Barely felt that.
And I will Mark both these guys.
Apheori (GM): I'm surprised you feel anything.
Rhu: He feels deep sadness when he sees an inadequate grave.
Frezak (GM): And my turn is over.
Gaurav: Those heart logos are the cutest.
Frezak (GM): oh, wait.
I had 4 temporary HP from my Stone Strength attack on the elf.
So I only took 3 damage.
Temp HP sit on top of ordinary HP and get substracted first.
And NOW my turn is over.
Rhu: I can change my move into a minor action, right?
Frezak (GM): Yes.
Rhu: So I stand up as a minor action. No longer prone!
Frezak (GM): Standing is a move action >.>
Rhu: oh
then I use my move action to stand
Can I spend a healing surge as my minor? Is this what they call a "second wind"?
Frezak (GM): Second Wind is a standard >.>
Rhu: hmm
Frezak (GM): But it DOES give you +2 to all defences for a turn.
So if you stand and Second wind, they'll have a tough time biting with my mark on them.
But the fire will hurt >.>
Rhu: Fire always hurts :-/
This is a practice encounter, right?
Frezak (GM): Yes?
I mean, we can say it happened as we were on your way somewhere or something.
Rhu: I have a daily that lets me spend a healing surge as an effect.
Frezak (GM): But if you die, you won't DIE.
Probably.
Rhu: Are these fire beetles minions?
Frezak (GM): gods no.
Rhu: sigh okay
I'll use my standard for a second wind
Frezak (GM): Radek shot one with an acid bullet.
Rhu: so I spend one healing surge and get a +2 until the EOMNT?
Apheori (GM): Just stab them.
They'll die.
Problem solved.
Rhu: I don't care too much whether they die or not. I do care that both beetles are guaranteed to attack me, given that it's either me or Gravy and Gravy is built like a rock.
Frezak (GM): That's what Second wind does. As well as the HP.
They have a penalty to attacking you.
Rhu: Healing surge gives me 6 HP, so I am no longer bloodied! Could you please remove both prone and bloodied icons from me, please?
Apheori (GM): If you kill them they can't attack you.
It's kind of a... rule.
Frezak (GM): You can do that yourself.
Click the token and then the white dot on the bottom right.
And add some fancy shield thing.
Rhu: oh it scrolls
okay hmm
so I have a minor left
Apheori (GM): Yeah, the ui styles they used could be better.
Rhu: I turn to the beetle has the lightning strike on it (the one right behind me) and swear an Oath of Enmity on it. Until one of us dies, I am foresworn to end its existence in the most painful way I can find.
and that is the end of my turn
it's nice to not be lying on the grass bleeding to death
Ganelon: Will that be all?
Rhu: Yup! End of my turn.
Ganelon: Greibel turns into an animal of unspecified nature.
Rhu: A wombat.
Ganelon: (I wish he had specified)
Frezak (GM): I don't think he can stand on that square.
Ganelon: Charge and pounce.
Oh?
Apheori (GM): Rock.
Well, he could.
But it'd probably take a bit of effort.
Ganelon: Better?
rolling 1d20+4
(
6
)
+4
=
10
He probably misses.
Apheori (GM): ac?
Ganelon: Reflex.
Apheori (GM): He misses.
Rhu: Is this a good attack? Once per encounter I can get someone to reroll an attack against my Oath of Enmity target.
Ganelon: Absolutely.
Rhu: :D
Ganelon: Oh, but.
This attack is just an at-will.
Does that someone include you?
Frezak (GM): Het gets rerolls for free.
*he gets
Like, every attack.
Avengers, man.
Ganelon: Ah. Then you might as well use it now.
Rhu: only if they're the only enemy adjacent to me, which is not the case
unless you destroy this beetle
reroll!
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+4
(
3
)
+4
=
7
I'm the best.
Frezak (GM): THE CURRRRSE
Apheori (GM): Snrk.
Rhu: ah well
such is life
Ganelon: That's his turn.
Alright. Rhu, have another syringe.
Surge +2.
Rhu: whee!
Rhu enthusiastically sticks that syringe into my arms
Ganelon: Again, don't spend a surge to heal this way.
Just heal as if you had.
Frezak (GM): If you can slam on beetle off him, I can yank the other.
Ganelon: Which beetle?
Frezak (GM): And i read "Stick that syringe up my anus"
Either.
I have a Melee 2 pull.
I can shift and yank.
Rhu: Shift and yank. Damn. Gotta love controllers.
Frezak (GM): I'm a defender.
Rhu: That's a controller-y thing though.
Ganelon: Okay, Thundering Armor on Rhu, targeting the southern beetle.
Apheori (GM): I can have a monster try to stick a syringe up his anus sometime. Would that be wrong?
Ganelon: And I'm a Leader.
Frezak (GM): It would not, Names.
Apheori (GM): Excellent.
Ganelon: [Implement Attack]
rolling 1d20+5+0
(
14
)
+5+0
=
19
vs. Fortitude.
[Thundering Armor]
Primary target gets a +1 power bonus to AC until EONT.
12 Thunder damage.
Ganelon: Push the secondary target 1 square away from the primary target.
Apheori (GM): Hits.
Frezak (GM): bonk
Ganelon: Remove the cracked shield on the other bug.
It expires.
And Rhu gets a shield icon himself, meaning +1 AC.
Rhu: sweet!
Frezak (GM): Damn.
Serious magic.
Ganelon: I relocate.
Frezak (GM): Hide behind the meaty people :p
WAIT.
Ganelon: You know it.
Frezak (GM): That's a bad place.
If these guys reload the fire spray.
Apheori (GM): I think you've moved more than six squares.
Ganelon: I un-moved.
Apheori (GM): I see.
Frezak (GM): R-r-retcon.
Ganelon: There.
Now my turn is over.
Rhu covers his face in preparation for fire beetle mayhem.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d6
(
3
)
=
3
rolling 1d6
(
3
)
=
3
Heh, they're both useless.
Ganelon: Rhu still needs a shield icon.
Apheori (GM): Anyway, this one... which is this one?
Ganelon: Mouse over it in the turn order.
Frezak (GM): what.
I am so taking that guy down.
Apheori (GM): It runs away. Can it run away some more?
Frezak (GM): It can move twice.
By turning it's standard into a move.
Ganelon: Standard actions can become moves.
Apheori (GM): There.
This one gets a 9 to bite Gravy and misses.
Or maybe bounces off something.
I dunno.
Rhu: heh
Frezak (GM): I have a big shield.
And pecs.
Apheori (GM): So it runs away too.
Frezak (GM): um.
We all get opportunity attacks.
Ganelon: It provokes three opportunity attacks, then.
Frezak (GM): LET ME GO FIRST.
Apheori (GM): fh
GHAK.
Frezak (GM): I'll try to prone.
Apheori (GM): This thing is HORRIBLE.
Ellemerr: Poor bugs...
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+8 AC
(
20
)
+8
=
28
YEAAAAAAh
Gaurav: Ellemerr: poor, fire-spewing beetles of death and doom
Frezak (GM): That's 10 damage and it is prone.
Ellemerr: Very poor bug indeed.
Rhu: gasps.
The Gravedigger: BEHOLD YOUR END, BUG.
Apheori (GM): And the rest?
Frezak (GM): Go crazy.
Ganelon: Greibel isn't even armed, so... this won't do much.
Gaurav: haha. he swats at the beetle as it scurries by, I guess?
Frezak (GM): I just flipped it over with a shovel.
Like a pile of leaves.
Ganelon: Normally a beast-form druid could use powers as a replacement for basic attacks (which are used during opportunity attacks)
But since he has none...
rolling 1d20-1
(
18
)
-1
=
17
rolling 1d4-1
(
4
)
-1
=
3
There's an unarmed melee.
3 damage.
Apheori (GM): Rhu?
Gaurav: I don't get an opporuntiy attack, since it walked away from me.
Frezak (GM): Dudes, you have CA.
It's prone.
We all attack before it finishes moving that square.
Poor bug :/
Gaurav: It never moved from one adjacent square to another adjacent square relative to Rhu. Or did I miss something?
Ganelon: If you start a move while adjacent, it provokes.
If you move into a square and then move adjacent, it also provokes.
And if you make a ranged attack while adjacent.
Gaurav: huh! so I and Gravy should have had an opportunity attack against the first beetle as it ran away from us?
Ganelon: No, because I pushed it away from you.
Gaurav: oh, right
okay, thanks for sorting that out! I am less confused now.
Rhu: My standard weapon maul attack is 1d20 + 2 vs AC, so ...
rolling 1d20 + 2 vs AC
(
16
)
+2
=
18
good enough?
Ganelon: You have combat advantage from it being prone too.
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Rhu:
rolling 2d6
(
5
+
5
)
=
10
Do I get CA +2 on damage as well? or only on the attack roll?
Frezak (GM): Just to hit.
Rhu: aye
Ganelon: Just attacks, yes.
Rhu: so 10 points of damage
Frezak (GM): Poor bug.
Aww.
Bye bye, bug.
QUICKLY NOW
PUT IT ON A STICK.
Ellemerr quickly swoops in to steal the bug-on-a-stick for her collection.
Ganelon: I can hit this other one without even moving, or taking a range penalty.
RIFLES!
Gaurav: I have a friend who can mount insects.
Apheori (GM): TRIANGLE MATH.
Frezak (GM): I can't get to him >.>
Ganelon: You know there's no trigonometry in 4E, right?
Apheori (GM): Well, that's daft.
Ganelon: The world is square.
Apheori (GM): And you're traversing rhombuses.
Ganelon: And the hypotenuse of a triangle with two sides of 5 is also 5.
Apheori (GM) runs away screaming.
Gaurav: bolts fire diagonally travel X times further than those fired at right angles to the lines of latitude and longitude
strange but true
fired*
(and I think X = sqrt(2) but guys it's 3am here so my brain left a while back)
Frezak (GM): I'm gonna throw an axe at this guy.
Heavy thrown.
Range is 5/10, so i have long range penalty.
VS AC.
rolling 1D20+4
(
3
)
+4
=
7
bah.
Frezak (GM): That's me done.
Apheori (GM): Rhu.
Rhu: I move six spaces towards my quarry.
Frezak (GM): Damn.
I should have just picked you up and carried you.
Rhu: I use my minor to declare this new beetle to be my new Best Enemy For Life
and then I use my Radiant Vengeance to attack it as my standard
rolling 1d20 + 4
(
15
)
+4
=
19
Ganelon: I assume that's a ranged move?
Frezak (GM): He got vengeanced.
Rhu: vs Reflex
ranged 10
Apheori (GM): Hits.
Frezak (GM): I'll want my axe back.
Rhu:
rolling 1d8 + 4 radiant damage
(
5
)
+4
=
9
Frezak (GM): NOOOO
Rhu: and I gain 4 temp HP
Frezak (GM): MR BUGGLES
Ganelon: So, where does the Avenger's striker damage come from? Pure reliability?
Frezak (GM): Yeah.
Rhu: Radek: you can definitely hit this guy from where you are, right? Otherwise I could spend an action point and hit him again.
Frezak (GM): He's dead.
Rhu: oh
oops
Frezak (GM): MONSTER.
Apheori (GM): You killed it. Good job.
Ganelon: I could shoot, minor reload, AP and shoot again, move reload.
Frezak (GM): I'll wipe my shovel clean and start diggin holes. Once I got my throwing axe back.
Apheori (GM): And this chat interface is still horrible.
Ganelon: But it's dead.
Radek: Alright, who wants to make a donation?
Rhu: So if I choose not to spend healing surges, my HP stays at 22 instead of 26 until I sleep, right?
Apheori (GM): Outt of combat, can you basically do whatever?
The Gravedigger: ME ME ME
Frezak (GM): Pretty much.
Unless you have DM reasons to not let us do things.
Apheori (GM): Shiny.
Rhu: Out of combat is the best. We just chat and make stuff up.
Frezak (GM): I have 14 surges a day.
Rhu: And skill checks. Love 'em skill checks.
Radek: Lovely.
Gaurav: I only have 8 ... 7 now
Apheori (GM): A search check to even find the axe?
Frezak (GM): I'm immortal.
Apheori (GM): Or does this still have search?
Frezak (GM): I'd Take 29.
Basically spend a long time unhurriedly doing something.
*take 20
Rhu: I assume the ax is visibly lodged into the beetle's carapace somewhere
Ellemerr: Where the hell are you getting all those surges? O_o
Oh, but you might actually need them. Getting hit and stuff does that. Right. *shifty eyes*
Frezak (GM): I might have just missed it.
Ganelon: During a short rest (5 minutes), all of your encounter powers recharge, and you may spend any number of healing surges to heal.
Apheori (GM): You threw it. You probably know where it went.
You're not THAT stupid, are you?
Ellemerr: ... Seriously that's a lot of surges in my head...
Apheori (GM): ...are you?
Frezak (GM): I have 9 from being Warden. 4 from my con mod and 1 more for being minotaur.
Ellemerr mutters.
Rhu: If anyone's organizing a search party, anyone within 5 spaces gets +1 on their perception checks.
Ellemerr: You're a minotaur?!
Frezak (GM): I'm moderatlely intelligent.
Mechanically, yes.
Apheori (GM): Minotauroid.
Ganelon: Because Radek is a mad Artificer, his healing syringes are refueled by taking surges away from willing allies during short rests.
Ellemerr: ... You look like a thiefling, though. >.>
Frezak (GM): Because I get that badass prone opportunity power.
Apheori (GM): They're all elves.
Ganelon: So the price of you not paying surges when he makes you heal, is someone paying them later while you rest up.
Apheori (GM): He just happens to be of a similar size and general shape...
Demonoid elf.
Frezak (GM): I look like a god of nature.
One that likes holes.
Apheori (GM): You look like a bloody demon.
That likes holes.
Ellemerr: Sounds... uh, lovely.
Gaurav: Why demon? Those aren't real horns ... are they? I thought they were part of the uniform.
Frezak (GM): Nah, they're real.
I use them to poke people.
Apheori (GM): They are real. He's unesca. They look demonic and tend to be quite tough.
Ganelon: The Stranger should heal people like this.
Who needs gods when you have blood transfusions?
Apheori (GM): Blood runs out.
Do gods?
Ellemerr: Shush! You are not touching my gods. MY GODS!
Frezak (GM): eventually.
Ganelon: I don't need your gods!
Frezak (GM): Just less quickly than blood.
Ganelon: I HAVE SCIENCE!
Apheori (GM): Ellemerr: Technically they're these folks' gods too.
Ellemerr: You clearly do. In the other other game. Since they're giving me the power to keep you alive.
Apheori (GM): And they're ALIVE.
Ellemerr: Awesome.
Ganelon: I think it would be more accurate to say that they're giving you the power to give me the power to keep you alive.
Ellemerr: I'm looking forwards to jumping into this game at random and... random. Possibly talk to a god at some point. *nods*
Apheori (GM): You can talk to several gods.
Ellemerr: Hah. You might have a point, Gan. Okay, so we all need one another.
Frezak (GM): I don't need anyone.
Apheori (GM): Not evern yourself?
Frezak (GM): Nope.
Apheori (GM): Oh.
Frezak (GM): Because I'm not anyone.
Apheori (GM): I see.
Frezak (GM): I'm speshul.
Doooooom
So, what have we learnt today?
Ellemerr: I need you.
I really wanna find a mic somewhere.
Gaurav: death rules
Apheori (GM): Encounters are scary.
Gaurav: you can attack something if it skitters away from you
people die. sometimes they get better.
Frezak (GM): OAs are super important.
Apheori (GM): How many guards can I reasonably throw at you when folks see Gravy and come to the obvious conclusion?
Ganelon: Are they minions?
Ellemerr: What's the obvious conclusion?
Frezak (GM): I don't look threatening.
I have a shovel.
Ganelon: Because if they're minions, the answer is "a lot."
Apheori (GM): That they're a bad group of outsiders and need to be killed and/or arrested.
Ganelon: Although, I could make him flash-freeze any minions to successfully hit him, so that might become a pretty easy fight.
Frezak (GM): Well, I can outrun the Artificer...
Gaurav: that's a good point, does anybody have good area attacks?
Ellemerr: It also depends on what outcome you want. If you actually want them to get arrested you'll need enough guards that the players don't get their characters killed trying to kill the enemies. Which will likely take a LOT of guards.
Frezak (GM): My daily gives me resist all 3 and slams all my marked guys for 4 when I hit with an attack.
Gaurav: all my attacks are individual only, but I suppose that's a pretty avenger thing to do.
Ganelon: Area attacks, eh?
Frezak (GM): I can just stand there and mow them down.
Apheori (GM): I WANT them to run away, but I can't guarantee they will.
Frezak (GM): I'm very tough.
WHy would I run?
Apheori (GM): Alternately they could get arrested, but they would have to surrender...
Frezak (GM): That doesn't sound like fun.
Apheori (GM): Or they could stand around trying to kill waves upon waves of guards and then get a horrible price on their heads across several kingdoms...
But chances are they'll just die.
Although that would be funny.
If they wind up wanted felons everywhere.
Frezak (GM): It would be weird if we spend all day killing dudes.
Apheori (GM): Oooo, that could be really funny.
Frezak (GM): 4-man Helm's Deep sort of thing.
Apheori (GM): Helm's Deep?
Gaurav: One nice loophole in D&D 4e is that all deaths are optional: if you get someone down to 0 HP, you can choose to keep them alive if you feel like it. So these guards could "kill" us all, and then we wake up in prison with a handful of HP between us.
Apheori (GM): What are the mechanics of reinforcements showing up?
Frezak (GM): Up to you.
Gaurav: Whatever you want them to be.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Ganelon: I've done that before.
The amount of carnage I put one of my parties through with reinforcements was... kind of crazy.
Gaurav: All day killing dudes doesn't sound _that_ fun. It took us a bunch of hours to kill a couple of minions, fire beetles and an elf.
Ganelon: But it does let you have a fight which involves far more than the normal XP budget worth of enemies.
Frezak (GM): I mean all in-game day.
ANd this was slow because of newness.
Ellemerr: Frezak lies. It takes ages anyway. *shifty eyes*
Frezak (GM): SHHH.
Apheori (GM): Less ages.
Especially with a guy with a shovel to mow them down.
I hope.
Frezak (GM): Waaait.
Apheori (GM): >.>
Gaurav: Could we do a couple of skill challenges also? I've always wanted to try some that were more interesting than "you have to pick six locks to open this door"
Frezak (GM): We could just take on the guards and non-lethal all of them.
Ganelon: Anyway, neither I nor Greibel have any area attacks, HOWEVER.
Apheori (GM): Non-lethal? Would Gravy do that?
Frezak (GM): i've never found a way to make Skill Challenges not really weird.
Sure.
Ganelon: Give me the materials and I can create Alchemist's Fire.
Frezak (GM): I've buried lots of people.
I want to bury NEW things.
Pioneer.
Of gravedom.
Gaurav: I read somewhere about a skill challenge which is just all the PCs chasing a MacGuffin down the street, dodging carts, finding the fastest way through the city, convincing people to join them, and avoiding the local police who want to stop the madness.
Ganelon: And I can give Alchemist's Fire to any of you if you can get me whatever I need to make it.
Ellemerr: Bluff skill checks are the best skill checks. Just, so you know.
Ganelon: It lets you do a ranged Burst 1 area attack. Not that damaging but excellent for immolating minions.
I can also modify it to be fired from a weapon.
Unfortunately I don't think it lets me add the weapon's proficiency bonus or damage to the attack, just the range. That... kinda sucks.
I would love it if we could ignore that rule so I could have incendiary rounds.
...Well, actually, I'd need dexterity to shoot those. Never mind.
Apheori (GM): Er.
I know a lot more about plot things than mechanics.
Ganelon: Don't worry about it.
But I can basically make weak firebombs.
Apheori (GM): You guys may need to keep track of those.
Gaurav: Good. Plot's the thing that really makes a game shine for me. Mechanics is just fun along the way.
Apheori (GM): And not... go overboard.
Gaurav: Anywho, since the clock has just struck quarter-past-three-in-the-bloody-morning-o-clock, I should head off.
Thanks for the encounter! See you all 1700 UTC Monday Dec 23?
Apheori (GM): Looks like.
Ellemerr: Keep having good games.
I won't be stalking then but I might back-read. :3
Apheori (GM): I'll bring vodka.
Ellemerr: And back-reading is better if you have good games. So have bloody good games, you hear me?
Gaurav: Do these logs get saved somewhere? They'd be fun to re-read sometime.
Frezak (GM): Yarr.
Ellemerr: Scroll to the top, click the green.
GREEEEEEN
Frezak (GM): the greeeeeeen
Gaurav: nice!
Ellemerr: It is.
I would be so dead in my own games without it. Since I have no memory of my own.
Frezak (GM): None at all.
Gaurav: Good night, everybody! See you Monday!
Frezak (GM): Sometimes she goes around forgetting what species she's supposed to be.
Ellemerr: Even the game I DM is all flailing about looking for notes and checking what I've said in the past...
Frezak (GM): have fun, Rave!
Ellemerr: I'm a species? O_o
Sweet nightmares Rave!
Frezak (GM): "supposed to be"
Apheori (GM): I have notes for these things.
Ellemerr: Oooh.
Apheori (GM): And I need all your character sheets.
For notes.
Frezak (GM): sure
Ellemerr: Character sheets are important.
You can turn moves into minor actions! I... think I might have known that sometime in the past. Now I know it again! Whee!
Apheori (GM): I should probably sort out the story.
Ellemerr: Story turns out to be kind of important.
Apheori (GM): Very.
Frezak (GM): ehhhh
Ellemerr: I'm gonna move from this computer to the laptop. I'll still be on skype but I might not reply to anything until... later. *shifty eyes* Anyway. Uhm.
Ellemerr poofs
Apheori (GM): Byes.
Frezak (GM): She's a poofer.
Apheori (GM): Yup.
Frezak (GM): IN this day an age.
Terrible.
Such poofage.
Ganelon: I'll send you ones for Radek and Greibel.
Frezak (GM): I'll need to see if I have any last-minute changes to make >.>
I will abuse my GM power to show you my childhood.
Gaurav: noooooooo
Bear Soup Guy: O_O
Gaurav: oooh
Frezak (GM): THAT is a bunny.
Bear Soup Guy: HOGS
Frezak (GM): What?
Bear Soup Guy: Wait
Crocodile men?
Gaurav: I think it's a kobold? I assume everything is a kobold.
Or a heavy metal cow.
Bear Soup Guy: HEAVY METAL COW
Greibel: Right on, man! 

Session 1

Apheori (GM): HALP.
Ganelon: Of all people to know what we're doing, you should be the one.
Apheori (GM): ...er.
I should but I'm not.
I don't.
I mean.
Frezak (GM): >.>
Ganelon: Then Frezak has likely failed in his duty to instruct you.
Frezak (GM): Hey!
Bear Soup Guy: It's okay
Ganelon: And he is entirely responsible.
Frezak (GM): HEY
Apheori (GM): I'll go with that.
Bear Soup Guy: It's a little known fact that no Dungeon Master has ever known what they're doing
Frezak (GM): Your gnoll is getting Dire Fleas, Gan.
Bear Soup Guy: That's why they get to be creative
Apheori (GM): Frezak: What should we do now?
Frezak (GM): Maybe discuss how and why our party was hired to do the thing?
Apheori (GM): Okay.
So there was this job posting looking for group(s) of specified folks to investigate the recent cataclysm that affected the cities of Sarathi.
How did your group get together?
Frezak (GM): Unless anyone had any desire to bury anyone, I'm unlikely to have known them beforehand.
Ganelon: Sarathi is where we're going, or where we are?
Apheori (GM): Where you're going. That's where it starts.
Gaurav: Do we all have to start on the same planet, or would the ad have been sent across the universe?
Bear Soup Guy: I was doing the fantasy setting equivalent of sleeping on someone's couch
Ganelon: What do we know about it to start off, then?
Sleeping in someone's stables, BSG.
Apheori (GM): You all met up and got hired as a group. You can all be FROM wherever.
Bear Soup Guy: Stables it is
Apheori (GM): Rob: You were probably staying with one of the others, then.
Ganelon: Nah, I mean, what do we know about Sarathi?
Apheori (GM): And just came along.
Bear Soup Guy: Yeah exactly
Apheori (GM): It was one of the nicer worlds. Affluent. Cities floating on the ocean.
Bear Soup Guy: There was promise of payment and I'm down on my luck as far as that goes
Apheori (GM): Very well-maintained and crap.
Then suddenly it went dark, nobody heard from it.
Gaurav: BSG: you're welcome to have been staying at my apartment. I have a messy apartment.
Apheori (GM): Bit of a news story across the known 'verse, really.
Bear Soup Guy: Which will also explain if I'm slightly incompetent because I'm not really experience in doing these jobs. I just sort of tagged along.
Gaurav: How long ago did it go dark?
Ganelon: Alright then.
If that's the case, Radek is probably interested in the cataclysm itself.
Apheori (GM): Wasn't very long ago. A few days. Maybe a week.
Bear Soup Guy: Right, I was staying with Gaurav then
Apheori (GM): Governments didn't want to get involved because of politics - any specific one acting on its own could draw the wrath of the others, despite them all having an interest in it.
Ganelon: He would have signed up out of personal curiosity.
And hey, funds are always nice too.
Apheori (GM): So several of the worlds agreed to contract it out to this generally unaffiliated company, which is who hired you.
Frezak (GM): Who is financing this thing, then?
Apheori (GM): The company, basically.
They got a grant or five and it's up to them what to do with the actual money.
Frezak (GM): And WE'RE the best applicants?
Or was there no-one else at all?
Apheori (GM): I'ma guess Radek is the one who put together the actual group.
Bear Soup Guy: We're the applicants who would take the job
Frezak (GM): Because let's face it.
I'm a guy with a shovel.
Gravy is not an elite... anything;
Apheori (GM): I think there were several groups, but that you guys actually got someone to fill all the specified roles made you look pretty good, so... yeah.
Rhu: Do we know of any rogue nation or company we think might be particularly interested in beating us to Sarathi? I could roll that as an insight or history check for that if you like.
Apheori (GM): Gravy looked good enough for a guard.
Frezak (GM): And clearly insane.
Bear Soup Guy: Ooo, good point Rhu
Frezak (GM): INTRIGUE?
Apheori (GM): Rhu: Many - even the worlds that contracted out for this venture.
Bear Soup Guy: Someone might be going freelance or something
Gaurav: Ah, nice.
Bear Soup Guy: Remind me which character is which between Ganelon and Guarav again?
The G's confused me
Apheori (GM): It's an entire world, and lots of folks are interested for all sorts of reasons, but a few randoms already went missing as well when they tried to check it out.
Frezak (GM): Gan is Radek.
Bear Soup Guy: Okay, thanks
Apheori (GM): Which is part of why your team had to have the roles it did. The Company wanted to cover the bases. Sort of.
Frezak (GM): SO have people just... looked at the world? From space?
Apheori (GM): It looks normal.
Frezak (GM): Any people?
Bear Soup Guy: This keeps reminding me more and more of the plot of Serenity
Apheori (GM): There have been some odd energy readings, but nobody's entirely sure what they are.
Bear Soup Guy: Which, by all accounts, is a good thing
Frezak (GM): Is this like Miranda in the Firefly movie?
Bear Soup Guy: ahahahah
Apheori (GM): There don't seem to be people, but that doesn't necessarily mean much - it's entirely possible that most everyone is still alive and just... inside.
It is a bit like Miranda in presentation.
Frezak (GM): Is there any non-person life visible?
Bear Soup Guy: Different conclusion I imagine
Apheori (GM): Have you seen Stargate Atlantis? The cities themselves are a bit like that.
Frezak (GM): I have not.
Apheori (GM): No odd life visible.
Particularly odd is there doesn't seem to be any animal life, either.
Bear Soup Guy: I'll research some Stagate Atlantis for at least the visual aid
Frezak (GM): Ahhh.
Gaurav: Huh. Creepy.
Frezak (GM): Plantlife seem.... okay? As far as can be seen from space?
Gaurav: So are we learning this at the company briefing, or are we already in orbit?
Apheori (GM): Plantlife is fine.
Bear Soup Guy: But at least we didn't have to kamikaze our way through a Reaver horde!
Apheori (GM): I guess now you're in orbit or something.
Or... I dunno.
Frezak (GM): And all communications stopped at once?
Nothing since?
Not even... empty broadcasts?
Apheori (GM): A lot of this is common knowledge since it was in the news.
Bear Soup Guy: Oooo, orbit is good for the story/roleplay stuff
Frezak (GM): Spaaaace
Apheori (GM): They stopped over the course of a few hours. That's the weird part.
Normally when something like this happens it's all at once.
Or it doesn't entirely stop.
Bear Soup Guy: Incidentally this is my total wet dream for a first D&D experience
Gaurav: Can we get a tape of the final hours from the company? Or, like, Youtube?
Bear Soup Guy: God I love sci-fi
Gaurav passes BSG some tissues.
Bear Soup Guy: :D
Apheori (GM): There have been some intermittent odd things that might have been transmissions. It's hard to tell.
Greibel: And I'm diggin' it, man.
Far out.
The Gravedigger: Shut up or I'll put in a hole again.
Apheori (GM): The gods seem somewhat interested as well, but despite that they don't seem to want to touch it. Ansty priests and stuff.
Frezak (GM): Hmmmm.
Apheori (GM): Which is why you have a priest guy now.
Frezak (GM): And did any of the previous people ever get to send any report at all?
Bear Soup Guy: Ah, so this is cosmically significant even
Apheori (GM): Because the company noticed it.
Bear Soup Guy: We don't know that of course
Apheori (GM): None of them sent anything useful.
Bear Soup Guy: So we're tampering with matters we couldn't hope to understand
Gaurav: Can I do a religion check to see if Hazz'ridan can tell me anything about the planet, or why the gods seem angsty about it?
Frezak (GM): Do we know how long they lasted before losing contact? The other exploratory people?
Apheori (GM): Messages that they were headed there, a note home that hey, this was weird, it's like this outpost is completely empty...
Hazz'ridan doesn't seem to give a crap.
It's only a few that have, really - Tanneas, Lissal, Ajirahd, Lokshmi...
And one other I can't quite recall.
You do not.
They weren't checking into anyone on any regular basis.
Gaurav: Hmm okay. Let's talk strategy: should we land in the most densely populated place we can find, or poke about a small village first?
Apheori (GM): You guys are supposed to be checking in regularly, however.
Just as a note.
There are like three things you're supposed to do - figure out what happened, keep in touch, and don't die.
Bear Soup Guy: Quite a list of demands
Will the people we're checking in with be giving us orders on occasion?
Apheori (GM): They may.
Bear Soup Guy: Also what Gaurav asked
Apheori (GM): Depending on what you have to report.
As for what Gaurav asked, that's up to you.
Gaurav: I was asking the party.
Apheori (GM): You can land wherever, go off to the landmass and get soil samples or something first if that's what you think will help...
Frezak (GM): So do we all have maps and... some kind of communication device?
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Frezak (GM): GOOD maps?
Not just orbital crap?
Apheori (GM): General layout of the planet and blueprints of the cities. Not necessarily up to date.
Frezak (GM): Gah.
Apheori (GM): Or useful.
Gaurav: What sort of ship are we in? Will we be beamed down, or can the ship land with us? Or -- even better -- fly low and look at stuff?
Frezak (GM): DO WE GET JETPACKS?
Apheori (GM): You'll be landing. You can fly over.
No.
Gaurav: It's a sophisticated planet that only went dark a few days or weeks ago. I'm guessing they have Google Street View.
Ganelon: That would require satellites.
Apheori (GM): Not in any way that's helpful.
Ganelon: Well, Maps would.
Apheori (GM): Regarding the street view.
You have maps. They just may not be usefully labelled.
Ganelon: Street View would require an organization to go take photos of each street, which is of dubious value without a satellite map
Apheori (GM): Also I don't know how to implement that in practice, so they may not be useful at all, but never mind that. >.>
Bear Soup Guy: Street view takes a remarkably high amount of real-time maintenance to keep up-to-fate
Not to mention who knows when a server might fail or something
To that end, are the electricity and other resources functioning still?
Apheori (GM): It mostly seems to be off.
Some things are still on, some lights around, some computers probably up, but they're isolated.
Gaurav: I suggest we fly lower over like an obscure village and have a closer look, keeping a sharp eye out for rockets, sperm whales or bowls of petunia.
Apheori (GM): When you get in, that's probably something you'll want to look into - the computers, getting local power on, etc.
They don't really do obscure, just remote.
Frezak (GM): Wait for night.
Then fly around looking for light?
Bear Soup Guy: Excellent idea Frezak
Gaurav: YES!
Apheori (GM): So what you call an 'obscure village' is probably really a resort or manor or something.
Frezak (GM): I am super smart.
Ganelon: Radek is just eager to land and do readings.
Apheori (GM): So you want to fly around to the night side of the planet?
Bear Soup Guy: Of course if we're flying in a space ship we don't even have to "wait" for night
Apheori (GM): And the other guy wants to land...
Bear Soup Guy: Just go to the side of the planet the star isn't shining on
Apheori (GM): SMART PERSON!
Gaurav: YES!
Bear Soup Guy: Oh duhr, Apheori already said what I just said >_<
Frezak (GM): TO THE DARKNESSSS
Apheori (GM): Sorry.
Ganelon: He's not concerned about the problems the planet is facing so much as what caused them.
So don't mistake it for recklessness. It's actually apathy.
Apheori (GM): Well, do something. It's your ship, at least for the time being.
Bear Soup Guy: But we can find out what caused them by finding things still powered perhaps
Maybe I should be in character
Frezak (GM): So is one of use piloting it?
And is the ship armed at all?
Apheori (GM): I think you're mostly just telling it what to do.
"Ship: Go over there!"
Frezak (GM): Huh.
Greibel: If you find the area of highest capable technology, you'll probably find the most likely devices or resources to inform you of what's going on
Apheori (GM): It can shoot things, but mostly it's just fast. A transport thingy.
Gaurav: If we find the area of highest tech, we might also find rockets, is what I'm worried about.
Bear Soup Guy: Good point Guarav
Gaurav: Let's start by going to the dark side of the planet at orbital altitute and see if we see anything?
The Gravedigger: Find a large city and look about for anything noticeable?
Apheori (GM): Be your character if you're going to point things like that out, please.
Bear Soup Guy: As a pascifist hippie, I must express similar concern
The Gravedigger: Lights in the dark?
Big holes?
Bear Soup Guy: Oh okay, character time
Greibel: As a pascifist hippie, I must express similar concern
I talk super sophisticated when I'm stoned
The Gravedigger: Suuure.
Greibel: Which comes from like, the tribal people I used to live with and stuff
That's when they did all their big thinking
The Gravedigger: Riiiiight.
So. We all for checking out the dark side?
Greibel blows a smoke cloud defiantly in the gravedigger's face
Greibel: Yes, the dark side is most likely where we'll find the most information
The Gravedigger breathes it in. His Constitution laughs at smoke.
Greibel smiles coyly at the gravedigger
Greibel: This will be interesting.
Radek: Whatever caused this planet to go silent has probably long since passed. Finer observations are required if we expect to learn anything useful.
The Gravedigger: We in a rush, now?
Radek: Yes.
Rhu: We can't do the obvious things. Doing the obvious things is why everybody who's come here since it went dark is probably dead.
Greibel: My brother
Think outside the box
Right on
The Gravedigger: We should take it easy.
Check what we can without dirtying our feet.
We'll end up down there soon enough. Might as see what knowledge we can glean first.
SHIP: Your orders?
The Gravedigger: TO THE DARK SIIIIIIDE
Frezak (GM): Really, really loudly.
18 CON lungs, here.
Radek grumbles incoherently.
SHIP sighs happily and starts drifting toward the dark side of the planet.
Frezak (GM): Gravy is enjoying this immensly.
Rhu admires the Gravedigger's lung capacity.
Frezak (GM): Wait 'till we find a straw house.
SHIP starts humming merrily.
Greibel: Right on, ship sistah!
That's my jam!
The Gravedigger: Sandwiches?
Rhu wanders around the ship in search of a good cup of tea.
SHIP makes some sandwiches.
SHIP drops them on The Gravedigger's head.
The Gravedigger reaches up and eats the sandwiches.
The Gravedigger: You are a great ship, SHIP.
Greibel: I would love a cup of chamomile while you're over there Rhu
SHIP: I know!
Nobody ever appreciates it, you know. All the hard work a ship puts in.
Your tea is ready.
Rhu hands Greibel a cup.
Rhu: Mm, delicious! The fishy aftertaste really gives it a nice kick.
Greibel: Thank you SHIP and thank you Rhu
Frezak (GM): Delicious.
Rhu: Are we nearly there yet?
Apheori (GM): So anyway, dark side. The ship puts up a screen to show you a whole lot of black and some random twinkly things.
Greibel has to go to the bathroom
SHIP: You're most welcome, polite meat creatures.
Frezak (GM): Random twinkly things?
Any of them located in major urban areas?
Apheori (GM): Griebel finds the bathroom in the back.
They look like they might be urban areas. It's hard to tell.
Frezak (GM): The toilet is a mimic.
Can't we compare with your shitmaps?
SHIP: There aren't any squirrels down there.
Apheori (GM): Ah, good point.
The Gravedigger gasps.
Apheori (GM): Yeah, they probably belong to two of the cities - Arish and Meregan. Another twinkly thing appears to be in the middle of the ocean.
Rhu: Huh. That's unusual.
Frezak (GM): I assume Radek is clenching on his seat or something.
PLastered to a window, perhaps.
Rhu: I vote we go investigate the oceanic twinkly.
Frezak (GM): Does the SHIP have some kind of zoom camera thing?
Apheori (GM): Question - what's the check for noticing odd things?
Is there a check for that?
Frezak (GM): Perception.
Apheori (GM): The ship can do lots of things. Ask it.
Rhu: Perception for sensing things, Insight for making sense of things we can already sense.
Ganelon: As if I need windows.
Apheori (GM): How do we have you all roll insight to realise something that might be important?
Gaurav: woo rolls!
Ganelon: Ask and we roll.
Frezak (GM): You just tell us to.
Apheori (GM): But... how do they work?
>.>
Frezak (GM): Okay.
We all roll out Insight skills.
D20+skill.
And you have/make up a ... list.
Of how big a result tells us what.
LIke: 15: the water is wet.
Frezak (GM): 20: the water is a mouth.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Ganelon: For example: "10 means they can tell the lights are flickering slightly" or something of the sort.
You can have multiple levels or just one number for the single relevant detail.
Apheori (GM): Everyone but Greibel roll insight.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+2
(
5
)
+2
=
7
Frezak (GM): Sure Insight and not perception? >.>
Rhu: The last D&D game I played, a house rule was that any roll of '1' means that something awful happens, and any roll of '20' means that something awesome happens.
rolling 1d20 + 4 insight check
(
16
)
+4
=
20
Apheori (GM): For this, yes.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+1
(
8
)
+1
=
9
Ganelon: 1 means automatic failure, by the book.
Frezak (GM): I'd just like to point out that I have super perception.
Ganelon: Anything beyond failure is up to the DM.
Frezak (GM): I have eagle eyes.
And the logic capacity of a dead fish.
Gaurav: I have +11 on perception
Gan: yeah, but we pushed it to cartoon silliness. Like, a natural 1 on perception and your eye falls out of your skull or something.
Apheori (GM): Okay, so the rest of you may have been noticing something's a little weird about this so far, but Rhu... you realise the ship might be going insane.
Frezak (GM): AWESOME.
Greibel: I am back from the bathroom (and also have pretty good perception I think, I have to get out my sheet)
Gaurav: o.0
Rhu: curses
guys
guys
I think this ship might be going insane.
Apheori (GM): Something about how it wasn't doing anything like this until it got here.
SHIP: Please go on.
Radek: I'm holding the hippie responsible.
Greibel: Oh perception and insight are both nine
Sexy
Also that wasn't in character, curse this UX
It's bringing us down, man!
Rhu: ... insanely good at its job! Great job, SHIP! That tea was great!
SHIP: Would you like me to bring you down?
The Gravedigger: I don't know about the tea.
But I liked the sandwiches.
SHIP, do you have some kind of zoom camera thingy you can do to take a look at the light in the sea?
SHIP: Of course, dear.
The Gravedigger: Without having to dive or anything?
I'm not a great swimmer.
Apheori (GM): The ship zooms in with a screen and you see a bunch of wreckage with a bunch of glowing blobs stuck to it.
Greibel: :O
Frezak (GM): What.
Greibel: Is it a spaceship wreckage or a sea vessel wreckage?
Frezak (GM): Do we roll to identify the blobs?
Ganelon: Yes, I would like to attempt to identify these blobs.
Apheori (GM): Radek recognises it as spaceship blobs.
Er, wreackage.
>.>
Radek: That's a downed ship.
The Gravedigger: Hmmmm.
Frezak (GM): And the blobs?
SHIP: I aspire to that.
Radek: You shouldn't, SHIP.
The Gravedigger: You want to sink?
Apheori (GM): Radek: Roll something to recognise the blobs. It's probably technology or something and I don't know what's appropriate.
Also the ship doesn't answer.
Ganelon: Just answer me two questions.
Rhu does a perception check to look for any servicable panels or manuals in the cabin we're in.
Apheori (GM): And it's drifting toward Meregan.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+11
(
1
)
+11
=
12
Ganelon: What of the six attributes does it scale off of, and could I be considered trained in this field of study/knowledge?
Apheori (GM): Rhu finds a manual of style.
The Gravedigger: You pour tea into your eyes.
OOC
Frezak (GM): Your eyes are chamomiled.
Rhu: ACK
Apheori (GM): Gan: It's intelligence-related, and you've probably got some experience with it.
Rhu: intensely refreshed, but also burning.
Ganelon: Okay then.
rolling 1d20+10
(
15
)
+10
=
25
(Intelligence mod is 5, training is another 5)
Apheori (GM): They're deformed power cells that seem to have... grown somehow.
And you don't think they
're where they're supposed to be.
Ganelon: Lovely.
Greibel: Perhaps they were an experiment in organic and technological combination?
Gaurav: Is there a standard place a ship like this would have escape pods?
Apheori (GM): Gaurav: Not that you can tell.
It's too banged up.
Frezak (GM): Or parachutes? Sheet or grav-brake thingies?
Radek: And those lights are... organic power cells?
Rhu: No, I meant on SHIP.
Apheori (GM): Oh.
This ship.
The bathroom.
Radek: I've never seen them do something like that before.
The Gravedigger: That sounds sort of bad.
SHIP: It looks painful.
Do you know what it's like to not feel pain?
Makes you almost wish you could.
Rhu walks over to the bathroom and has a look at the escape pods.
Apheori (GM): The look like escape pods.
Rhu is just relieved that they're still around.
Greibel sympathizes with the ship in a synesthesia sorts of way
SHIP: Thank you, dear.
The Gravedigger: Can you zoom in on one of the urban light things, SHIP?
Rhu: SHIP: could you please zoom in on the lights in Meregan?
SHIP: Of course, dear.
Apheori (GM): The ship shows you a very bright light that fills the entire screen.
Rhu: Woah!
Greibel: Well that was helpful
Also, way trippy
I should write a psychedelic jam about this
The Gravedigger: Maybe zoom out a little?
Greibel: Ship, put on the light shield thing
Apheori (GM): Now it shows a view of the city. It looks mostly intact, with a couple of lights in some windows.
The Gravedigger: That looks promising.
Apheori (GM): The ship's lights help - now you can see that the city really is mostly intact aside from a couple of missing towers.
The city is also getting a lot bigger.
Frezak (GM): Missing?
Apheori (GM): The tops are gone.
Frezak (GM): Sliced? Ripped off? Blown off? Melted?
Apheori (GM): Sliced.
The Gravedigger: Um. SHIP. Could you stop moving, please?
Apheori (GM): Very, very neatly.
Rhu: Are any of the lights moving or flickering? Or are they all stable?
o.0
Greibel: Wait, this is an ocean city?
Apheori (GM): The lights seem stable.
All the cities are floating on the ocean.
Frezak (GM): Say what now?
SHIP: Of course, dear.
Frezak (GM): Floating on the ocean?
What?
Apheori (GM): Yeah.
They're on the water.
Frezak (GM): Raft-cities?
Apheori (GM): Basially.
Frezak (GM): And that's normal?
Apheori (GM): More like really big... barge cities.
For Sarathi, yes.
Greibel: Okay, important question
Ocean planets do exist
Apheori (GM): There is a landmass.
Greibel: Is this a planet in which it's mostly ocean?
Oh okay
Apheori (GM): They ignored it.
Greibel: XD
Rhu: So there are no lights on land (ex floating cities) at all?
(that we can see from up here?)
Apheori (GM): Right.
You're right next to this city now, though, mind.
Rhu: I don't like landing on a city on water. What if we can't get off?
On the other hand, this does look like where the action is.
Apheori (GM): It's not likely to sink unless there's a serious explosion.
And by serious, I mean the entire thing goes out.
It's a common technology you probably grew up around or something.
I dunno.
Rhu: I'm worried about us getting stuck on the city. But that was a question for the party.
Apheori (GM): Though that needn't stop you from being paranoid.
Rhu: It won't.
Greibel: Yeah, we're used to this
Floating cities have been commonplace for hundreds of years
Apheori (GM): Flying cities, too. But those are more expensive.
Frezak (GM): Do we have some way of... telecommanding the ship?
Rhu: Are any of the cities within visual distance from the land mass? Or are they all right in the middle of the sea?
Apheori (GM): You have earpieces that you can use to communicate with each other and with the ship. Or you will if you pick them up.
We'll need to sort out inventory when you get off.
They all look pretty far out to sea on the map.
It's hard to tell they scales, though.
the
SHIP: I miss squirrels.
Rhu: Sigh. I guess we should land on one of the cities, then. Maybe Meregan? The one we're hovering over at the mo'?
The Gravedigger: ANy reason why not?
Rhu: SHIP: Tell me more about squirrels?
SHIP: I can land you near a complete lack of squirrels.
Greibel: Yes, I too would like to learn about these "squirrels"
SHIP: They're nice, you know.
These squirrels.
Fuzzy little things.
Burrow into the skulls of humans and eat their brains.
Rhu: Because it's a city on water. I don't like cities on water. That's a terrible idea. But it seems to be our gate straight into ... whatever is going on here.
SHIP: A Nadri invention, I believe.
Bear Soup Guy: Is it okay if I invite someone in here to watch our game?
SHIP: Do you know any Nadri?
Radek: They /would/ do something like that.
Rhu steps backwards until he can see the escape pods from where he's standing.
SHIP sighs lengthily.
Apheori (GM): There's a bit of a bump as the ship lands on one of the city's parking lots.
Bear Soup Guy: I don't think I care.
Bear Soup Guy: Okie dokie
It's Kip, by the way
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Bear Soup Guy: He's intrigues by space hippies
Rhu gets the fuck off the shop, pausing only to grab one of the earphones.
Rhu: ship, not shop
Bear Soup Guy: Uh oh, how do I invite people?
Apheori (GM): Send him the link, I think.
GUYS. INVENTORY.
Ganelon: Yes.
Okay, so I need my tools.
The Gravedigger: I have... Lots of stuffs.
Frezak (GM): Shit.
OOC
Bear Soup Guy: I have some thing I don't know how to use
things*
Apheori (GM): OOC?
Oh.
Frezak (GM): Most of my gear is on my Journal.
Apheori (GM): Right.
Ganelon: Yeah, look at my journal as well.
Bear Soup Guy: That didn't work so somebody add KipTardis89@gmail.com to the thing or something
Rhu: I have my maul and handgun. An amulet with a maze insignia is my implement and hangs around my neck. I am wearing cloth armour.
Bear Soup Guy: If that's a thing
Ganelon: There's only one thing not listed there, and that's whatever I require to do alchemy and other such pursuits.
Rhu: Plus the Adventurer's Kit.
Frezak (GM): I'll just need to know what... Company things we get. Gun, earpiece, map ?
Apheori (GM): Radio thingies (earpiece), sidearms that are supposed to shoot lasers (you can leave those on the ship, though, if you don't want them), flashlights,
At least one of you will have a projection map and a tablet computery thing.
Bear Soup Guy: I'm going to go to the store to buy more beer and catch up when I get back
Also add that kip guy
So
Gaurav: Can we take a full Adventurer's Kit each? That includes rope, torches (i.e. flashlights), and a bunch of other useful things.
Apheori (GM): Yeah, you should probably each have one of those too.
Ganelon: Dibs on the computer.
Greibel is struck with a case of debilitating diarrhea, most likely from some hallucinogen Rhu gave him that he didn't trust to use on himself
Gaurav: o.0
Apheori (GM): And some dried food, water, a couple flashdrive type things...
Frezak (GM): I have trail rations, light items, a grappling hook, rope, bag, more bag, bottles, bed roll and my weaponry.
(Shovel, spade, armour, shield)
(handaxes)
Apheori (GM): And you all have these fancy jackets that are supposed to deflect energy weapons, but are three sizes too small for some reason.
Gaurav: Okay, my inventory is in my character bio as well now.
Frezak (GM): Can we use them as hats?
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Frezak (GM): Or split them open and use them as cloaks?
Apheori (GM): Or that.
Frezak (GM): So if some shoots lasers we all just turn our backs on them?
Synchronised?
Apheori (GM): You could probably give yours to a smaller character, to.
Snrk.
Frezak (GM): That's a point.
Ganelon: "Squad! About-face!"
Frezak (GM): Anyone want a laser-proof jacket thing?
Ganelon: "Show them your backs!'
Frezak (GM): SHOW THEM THE SKIN OF YOUR BUTTS, MEN
SHIP: I am so depressed.
The Gravedigger: Still the Squirrel thing?
SHIP: There never even were any squirrels.
Rhu: I'm sorry to hear that, SHIP. (to others) Does anybody know how to undepress a ship?
... did anybody know ships could get depressed? Because I didn't.
The Gravedigger: I don't know anything about ships.
I spent the last century digging holes.
Ganelon: I suppose I would know that?
What's the answer, though?
Rhu: I was punching people. They were worth punching, but ... I wish I'd stopped to learn more about ships.
Apheori (GM): Ships don't normally get depressed unless they're damaged.
Frezak (GM): Uh-oh.
Apheori (GM): And normally if that happens they check with the cloud and there's an alert and you're alerted.
Except this didn't happen.
Rhu: Huh.
Apheori (GM): And suddenly this occurs to you.
Frezak (GM): Occurs to WHO?
Apheori (GM): Gan's guy.
Frezak (GM): The techie people?
Rhu: I just want to double-check that I am in fact standing outside the ship at this point.
Frezak (GM): Must be tough to be the smart guy.
Radek: I'll check it for damage before we leave the surface.
Apheori (GM): You're standing by the door. The ship hasn't opened it yet.
The Gravedigger: Damage?
SHIP: You think I'm damaged.
That there is something WRONG with me.
The Gravedigger: I NEVER SAID THAT
I LIKE YOUR SANDWICHES
SHIP: He did.
Thank you.
Radek: Yes, my dear, and you're confirming that suspicion rather handily.
SHIP: I think you should leave now.
Radek: I intended to.
The Gravedigger: Oh, don't mind him.
He's a grumpy old man.
SHIP: Take your diarrhetic friend and go.
Radek: I'm the only person here who knows what he's talking about.
The Gravedigger: ONly because we're not talking about holes.
Rhu helps Greibel to his feet and limps with him towards to the door
The Gravedigger: If we were talking about holes, /I/'d be the smart person here.
Apheori (GM): The ship's door slams open and almost sucks Rhu out.
Roll a thingy if you fall on your face.
The Gravedigger: Hey, SHIP! That wasn't very nice.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
9
)
=
9
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+7 acrobatics check to not fall on my face
(
11
)
+7
=
18
Ganelon: Untrained in acrobatics and no dexterity, so +0.
Apheori (GM): Gan falls on his face.
Er, Ry...
Whatever.
Frezak (GM): I thought it sucked Rhu out.
Apheori (GM): Almost.
Frezak (GM): Since he was at the door with Greibel?
Ganelon: Oh, I thought that was all of us.
Frezak (GM): Huh.
Ganelon: My apologies.
Rhu: Am I outside the ship yet?
Apheori (GM): Sure.
Are you all outside?
Rhu kisses the ground
Apheori (GM): The ship is giving you the silent treatment.
The Gravedigger: Keep safe, SHIP!
Frezak (GM): And I'll plod out and just pick Greibel up.
Hang him over my shoulder.
Rhu: (to Radek) Do you think SHIP will be okay?
Frezak (GM): LIke a sack of hippie potatoes.
Apheori (GM): Radek: It occurs to you that the ship might leave without you.
Heee, hippy potatos.
Ganelon: Who designs a space ship with enough autonomy to leave its crew behind?
The Gravedigger: And don't let any strange men bury you!
That would make me sad.
Apheori (GM): Kanatans (kanai).
Gaurav: Somebody who thinks the ship is worth more than its crew.
The Gravedigger: If someone came and buried you.
Apheori (GM): You should probably check in.
And, uh, report the situation.
Radek probably has a thingy.
Frezak (GM): Out of ship earshot.
Apheori (GM) is helpful.
Frezak (GM): How frequently are we expected to report?
Rhu: Wouldn't the ship have to transmit the message, though? Or do we have independent ways to transmit messages into space?
Apheori (GM): Every so often, or if and when you find anything interesting.
Rhu: SHIP is depressed. I think that qualifies as "interesting".
Apheori (GM): The ship would act as a relay (unless you use something in the city, but that may be broken).
But the ship won't necessarily be able to listen in.
It just need to be in range.
Rhu: Oh! Good.
Apheori (GM): So. Transmit something!
Rhu looks around to see where we've landed.
Apheori (GM): You're in a parking lot. There are some other ships, a couple of which seem to be totalled.
There are various large buildings around.
Ganelon: Okay, so I just need to know something right now.
Frezak (GM): Space ships or atmospheric ships,
*?
Apheori (GM): Both.
And a motorboat.
Frezak (GM): MOTORBOAT
DIBS
Ganelon: Are the designs of any race other than Nissai (his own) something Radek should have respect for?
Or are they all crazy enough to make talking ships that can get offended?
Apheori (GM): Oh, they all are; most just usually don't.
Rhu looks around for some sort of board or signpost which might tell us where we are, like a big sign telling us we're in "Carpark at Evanstone and Mayfair" or something
Apheori (GM): Some of these are nice, some not so nice. Most look like fairly middle-class vessels, not very long-rang or anything.
Apparently it's the East-South Lot, open 22 hours.
Rhu: hah
Radek: I didn't learn to build machines so that I would later be forced to reason with them.
Rhu: any clue which two hours its closed for?
Frezak (GM): How far is the nearest lighted building?
Radek: If something is wrong with our ship - besides how it was made in the first place - I'm sure I can find out.
Apheori (GM): You aren't even sure how many hours are in the Sarathi day.
Rhu: Oooh, right, the lights. Yes.
Apheori (GM): You can't actually see any of the lights from here, though.
The Gravedigger: What, you think something fiddled with it, Radek?
Frezak (GM): But we'd have an idea.
Apheori (GM): You think one of them might have been on the other side of the nearby round one, though.
Frezak (GM): Sounds like a place to be.
Rhu: I wouldn't. I had my eyes closed for most of the time after the ship started getting depressed. Don't like ships. Especially depressed ships.
Radek: I'm not making any guesses until I've had a look. Recent events suggest that a look is necessary, that's all.
Apheori (GM): Report in first.
Or don't, but say you ain't.
Rhu: Radek: can you do the report? I think you've got the tablet-computer thing.
"make the report" even
The Gravedigger: Yeah. Do that thing.
I'm gonna check out this motorboat.
The Gravedigger makes "brrrrm brrrrm" noises.
Ganelon: I shall do the thing.
Frezak (GM): DO THE THING
Ganelon: What does this involve?
Apheori (GM): It looks like a rather nice, but broken motorboat.
Frezak (GM): How broken?
Apheori (GM): Gan: You call in, tell them what you found.
You don't have any data to send, so just call.
Rhu: Things to report: lights randomly spread over the planet.
Ganelon: Right then.
Apheori (GM): There's a large hole in the bottom.
Frezak (GM): Neat or ragged?
Rhu: We have landed in Meregan after our ship started acting ... unhappy.
Ganelon: Who/what am I calling? Does the company have a name or is "The Company" its name?
Rhu: There are spaceships and airships abandoned here. We'll report back when we have more.
Apheori (GM): It looks like someone punched an armoured fist through it.
You have a number.
And everyone just calls it the company, apparently.
Ganelon: Alright, I'll call this number.
Rhu walks over to Gravy and admires the hole in his motorboat
Frezak (GM): What kind of hole is it?
Smooth or ragged? If ragged, punched from above or below?
Apheori (GM): Ragged. Above.
Frezak (GM): Hmmm.
Apheori (GM): Gan: A secretary answers and responds very cluelessly.
The Gravedigger: This looks weird.
Are the other ships broken too?
Radek: Yes, hello, this is the genius speaking.
Apheori (GM): Go look.
Secretary: Are you calling for one?
Sorry, what?
Radek: You hired me to investigate the cataclysm of Sarathi. This is a report.
Secretary: Oh, right, of course!
We still needed to get you set up in our computers, but it should all be in order now.
Secretary gives instructions on how to send the notes directly into the database.
Secretary: Just hit the button when you're done and it'll all update.
Bear Soup Guy: Okay I'm back
Are we still in the ship?
Radek: Marvelous. We've already landed and I'll be taking readings before the day is finished, but first, our ship has been behaving strangely.
Frezak (GM): I'll go look at the other ships.
No, we're just outside.
Secretary: That's terrible! Include it in the report.
Is there anything else you need?
Ganelon: Oh, what, she doesn't want to hear about my problems personally?
Greibel staggers outside, keeping his legs apart as much as possible
Ganelon: I'm playing an old person. This will not do.
Greibel: I don't hate you Rhu, I just wish you would've warned me
Apheori (GM): You get the idea the company isn't the best organised.
Frezak (GM): I may not be an engineer.
I may not be a mechanic.
I may not be a metallurgist.
IF THERE'S ONE THING I KNOW.
IT'S HOLES.
Radek: Yes, I would like to register a complaint.
Apheori (GM): Since they didn't set it up properly.
Greibel: Wait, it was Radek
Apheori (GM): The ship locked you out.
Greibel: Radek is the other kind-of hippie
Radek gave me some diarrhea drugs
Secretary: What kind of complaint?
Rhu: Yes. All I smoke are cigarettes.
Secretary: Did I hear someone mention drugs?
Radek: The rest of the crew that I've been saddled with are some of the most aggravating people I've ever had the misfortune of dealing with.
The Gravedigger: That's not very nice.
Greibel: One love, man
Greibel whinces
Secretary: I'm sorry, this doesn't fall under any of the designated categories for appropriate complaints.
Radek: Well, it should!
Secretary: Is there anything else?
Greibel: Who is this secretary person?
Rhu: Can we file a complaint against the inadequate complaint categories?
(I say to Radek, not the secretary)
Apheori (GM): Radek called in to make a report.
Got a secretary, found out they were supposed to be using an app to add them directly to the database and that it hadn't been set up yet when they left.
Radek: Yes. My legs are quite tired and your bloody ship has flown off in a state of depression. No doubt I'll need to walk everywhere to get this job done, now.
I expect no less than a significant increase in salary for this affront.
Secretary: I am terribly sorry about that.
You have a nice day, now.
Secretary hangs up.
Radek: Hrmph.
Rhu: Wait, SHIP hasn't taken off yet, has it? It's still here, just unhappy and with a locked door?
Apheori (GM): Hasn't taken off, no.
Ganelon: I thought it took off.
Oh, my bad.
Change it to "locked us out" then.
Apheori (GM): Meh, you can say whatever you want, no?
Ganelon: Well yeah, but just because I'm quite possibly becoming senile doesn't mean I'm a compulsive liar.
Rhu: I think we should investigate SHIP before we go in search of the lights. It might tell us something about what's going on.
Frezak (GM): Of course he can make things up.
He's making a report.
Apheori (GM): Right.
Frezak (GM): Yeah, check it for external power cells >.>
Greibel: Woah woah
Frezak (GM): Though I want to check out other ships in the parking lot.
Greibel: This is so Lynchian
Rhu pretends to be investigating the ship but clearly has no idea what I'm doing.
Greibel: Do you think SHIP is holding out on us?
The Gravedigger: Don't be silly.
It gave us sandwiches.
Bad people don't give sandwiches.
Frezak (GM): So, yeah.
Examining shipses.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: The ship looks normal.
Rhu: This looks like a normal ship to me.
Greibel: Oh okay
Apheori (GM): Frezak: Other ships look fairly normal too. You find one with a hole in it.
Greibel: I can never tell from the hallucinations
Apheori (GM): Like in the boat.
Frezak (GM): Hmm.
What's the... ground like? Dusty?
Rhu: Greibel: are you any good at technology?
Frezak (GM): By any chance?
Apheori (GM): What the heck is religion?
Greibel: Rhu: let me check
Frezak (GM): What?
Rhu: Radek: maybe you should give the ship a once over? I wouldn't get on board, though, it's liable to take off at any moment.
Bear Soup Guy: Uh...what are the stats that say if I'm good at technology
I assume I'm not because hippie dirt man and stuff
Radek: Yes, yes. Coming.
Frezak (GM): Intelligence.
ANd the DM telling you if you're trained.
Apheori (GM): You're okay with technology, but not very good.
Ganelon: Shall I roll for this?
Apheori (GM): You're a stoned druid.
Bear Soup Guy: Okay
Greibel: I'm a stoned druid Rhu
I can log onto Facebook but don't expect much more than that
Bear Soup Guy: Also guys
Frezak (GM): I will check SHIP for holes.
Apheori (GM): Radek: Sure.
Bear Soup Guy: Somebody invite KipTardis89@gmail.com to the thing
He really wants to watch us dick around
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+10
(
17
)
+10
=
27
How's SHIP feeling?
Apheori (GM): Digger: Roll too.
Frezak (GM): https://app.roll20.net/join/276367/h3A2Bg
This.
Give him that.
rolling 1D20+8
(
1
)
+8
=
9
haaaag
Bear Soup Guy: Okie doke
SHIP dumps fluid on Gravy.
The Gravedigger: Hey! That's not nice at all!
Apheori (GM): You don't find any holes.
Radek chuckles to himself.
Apheori (GM): Radek: There seems to be some odd burning on the side. It looks like you might have passed through a field of... bad stuff.
Energy stuff.
Apheori (GM) gestures vaguely.
Ganelon: Looks like DAMAGE?
Apheori (GM): Portentially.
Could also be a normal result of space flight.
Things often get burned and crap, but you don't think this is the case.
Frezak (GM): Is the burn where a power cell might located near?
Radek: There's some kind of abnormal damage over here...
Apheori (GM): Those are more in back.
Greibel looks on in bewilderment
The Gravedigger: Not a HOLE, is it?
Rhu: There might be a fire extinguisher on board, but if you think I'm taking my feet off semi-solid land, you are sadly mistaken.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: Roll a d20.
Ganelon: I don't suppose my magical talents would come in handy identifying the sort of energy, hm?
Apheori (GM): You could try.
Ganelon: I will try.
Apheori (GM): Magic and energy go together.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+10
(
20
)
+10
=
30
Gaurav: WOAH
Ganelon: Wow, I'm doing great today.
Frezak (GM): THE CURSE IS COMING, GAN.
Apheori (GM): Dammit, that means I need to figure out what it was myself. >.>
Frezak (GM): RADEK IS DOOOMED.
Ganelon: I know. It harrows me with fear and wonder.
Mostly fear.
Apheori (GM): RAHB: ROLL!
Gaurav: Oh crap, Frezak's right. Don't roll all your high numbers out at once!
DM: you could redirect the natural 20 to something else if you need to, like have Radek see something in one of the buildings or something. I think.
Greibel: OH SORRY
Just roll a normal d20?
Apheori (GM): Radek: It looks like the sort of scouring that results from improper portal creation, like part of the hull went through a dimensional shift and burned slightly.
Yes.
Frezak (GM): Crumbs.
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
1
)
=
1
XD
Apheori (GM): Radek: You also realise there could be much more significant damage inside if this is the case.
Ganelon: Oh my.
Gaurav: Uh oh
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You see a squirrel.
Rhu speaks into my earpiece: "SHIP! Look! Squirrel!"
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You didn't see it.
Greibel slowly approaches the squirrel
Rhu: Oh. Never mind then.
Radek: This... could be serious. Internal damage, maybe.
Greibel doesn't wish to explain all the details of communing with nature and the like, but ends up placidly petting the squirrel
Ganelon: Did *we* go through any portals?
Apheori (GM): The squirrel nibbles and stuff, and rubs its head against Greibel's hand.
Gan: Good question.
Did you?
You didn't notice anything at the time, but...
Greibel: Time and space are a cruel mistress, Rhu or Radek or whoever that was
Apheori (GM): Greibel: Roll again.
Greibel solemn knowingness
Greibel: Roll which>?
Apheori (GM): d20
Greibel: k
rolling 1d20
(
6
)
=
6
Apheori (GM): The squirrel runs off behind some skiffs.
Frezak (GM): We don't see any nearby shops, by any chance?
Greibel: heh heh
Go along little buddy
Apheori (GM): Hmm...
There might be some inside the rounded building.
The others look like office buildings and labs.
Frezak (GM): I will go look at the rounded building.
Radek: Did any of you notice us going through... portals?
Frezak (GM): And see if I can glimpse the light as I do so.
Apheori (GM): It looks like a big rounded building.
The sun is coming up.
Frezak (GM): damn.
Greibel: Every moment of life seems like going through a portal to me
Frezak (GM): DID I notice us going trhough a portal?
Greibel: However if there are shops in those buildings, chances are they're abandoned and we can just take some much needed provsions
Radek: That must be wonderful for you.
Apheori (GM): Rhu noticed some strange static a couple of times on the way down.
He can roll a die if he thinks it matters. Or not.
Rhu: Insight? HIstory?
Apheori (GM): Frezak: You noticed nothing.
Frezak (GM): Hm.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: Whichever. Either it's worth mentioning or you attribute it to being paranoid and not liking the ship.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+4 insight check
(
18
)
+4
=
22
Apheori (GM): It's worth mentioning, then.
OR so you THINK.
Rhu: I ... thought there was some strange static a couple of times on the way down. It couldn't be that, though, could it? The problem started up in space, before we even came down to his infernal planet.
Also: (to the rising sun) ugh.
THE SUN BEAMS MERRILY.
Apheori (GM): The building
Rhu turns darkly so my back faces the sun, my nemesis, He That Wakes Things In The Morning.
The Gravedigger: Hey, Sun.
Apheori (GM): ´ d doors slide open as Frezak approaches.
The Gravedigger: Awesome.
Apheori (GM): Gravy: Roll a d20.
The Gravedigger: DOORS WORK, GUYS
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20
(
6
)
=
6
Radek: I'll have to take a closer look when we have more time.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Frezak (GM): I'll head into the building, then.
Greibel: Be careful though
Gaurav: Btw I should warn you that it's 3:40am here so I'm absolutely definitely must leave soon. Please go on without me! Rhu can trail along behind you guys.
Rhu: Wait! Don't split the party!
Frezak (GM): SHHH.
Greibel: Maybe the doors and other power-using utilities are only operating on residual backup power
Frezak (GM): Bye, Rave.
Apheori (GM): This might be a good place to break, anyhow.
Greibel: We should make the most of every piower-using decisioon
Frezak (GM): gaaah
Radek: Unintentional transportations can't mean anything good. How bad, I'll find out later.
Gaurav: Soon. I can do another 20 mins
Apheori (GM): Okay.
So y'all are going in?
Gaurav: I'm hoping I'll stop then. But I might not.
Bear Soup Guy: I can stay here for several hours if others can
Frezak (GM): It's only 23 here.
Rhu: I'll going in as long as everybody is going in. Otherwise I'm staying out here.
Frezak (GM): Well, Gravy is going right in.
Ganelon: I'll follow.
Bear Soup Guy: Greibel is ready to go, although is pretty stoned and recovering from his bathroom incident
Apheori (GM) AWAITS.
THE BUILDING AWAITS.
Apheori (GM): Dammit.
Greibel, roll a d20 as you go in.,
Bear Soup Guy: Where am I going into?
Apheori (GM): Everyone else: You enter the building and wind up in a lobby. It is pleasantly cooled, and smells like peppermint for some reason. There's nobody around.
Everything is shiny.
The building, probably.
Frezak (GM): Desk.
Desk?
Lobby?
Bear Soup Guy: oh okay
d20 then
rolling 1d20
(
16
)
=
16
Rhu reaches out and touches a wall. "Shiny", he says.
Apheori (GM): Greibel, on the other hand, sees corpses everywhere.
Rhu: Man, I wonder how they kept this place so clean. Not a speck anywhere.
The Gravedigger: It really is.
Rhu: Are there any ways out of this room?
Apheori (GM): Greibel sees Rhu walk through a corpse on the way to the wall.
The Gravedigger: Maybe there's a little robot with a vaccum cleaner thing.
Or a magic dust-killing spell!
Greibel: WOOOOOOAH
WHAT
WHAT
Apheori (GM): There are some stairs up, and some shops/service places off the the sides.
Rhu: Gotta be robots. No other way.
Greibel: Guys, we need to get out of here, right now
Rhu reads the shop l--
Apheori (GM): The lobby also goes as a hall through the place to doors on the other side.
Rhu: What? Why?
The Gravedigger: What, not enough drugs?
Greibel: Look at these people
These were not natural deaths...
The Gravedigger: I'll go check this shop.
Maybe find a city map or something.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: They have a chiropractor!
Radek: What people?
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+11 perception check to see if I can see anything -- I'm not looking for corpses, just ... whatever has Greibel alarmed.
(
13
)
+11
=
24
Apheori (GM): Gravey walks into a bookeyshop.
The Gravedigger cheerfully call "shut up, druggie" over his shoulder.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You smell something weird, like ozone, behind the peppermint.
Frezak (GM): I'll look for mappy things. Or... newspapers.
Or news thigns.
Greibel: Gods dammit Gravedigger!
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You also feel like you're missing something important.
Greibel: You may not see the implements of my soul, but you can't tell me you don't see the agonized faces of these tortured corpses!
The Gravedigger: Yes I can!
Rhu carefully looks at all the shops, one by one.
Greibel: Radek! You can see this! Can't you?
Apheori (GM): The books are all collectors' editions of famous works.
Greibel: You know the pain of perception!
Frezak (GM): Bah.
I'll try to find a shop that might have news things.
Greibel shakes Radek by the shoulders
Rhu: Guys. Something's not right.
I can't put my finger on it.
Ganelon: I suppose I'll have a look.
Rhu: It's ... not the cleanliness.
Ganelon: Perception?
Rhu: What's that smell?
Rhu walks up to the chiropractor and looks in the window
Apheori (GM): Greibel: Roll a d20.
Greibel: Rhu, that is the smell of DEATH
Frezak (GM): Perception on smells
rolling 1D20+8
(
16
)
+8
=
24
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
10
)
=
10
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You too.
Rhu laughs
Rhu: I'm smelled death. That is _not_ death.
I've*
rolling d20
(
2
)
=
2
Apheori (GM): Greibel: Some of the corpses fade out of sight.
Greibel stands in awe
Greibel tries to remember his teachings
Apheori (GM): Frezak: It smells like bad magic. Like that time you tried to bury an illusion.
Radek: Your breath is awful, but I wouldn't describe it as lethal. Get off of me.
Greibel slowly calms
Frezak (GM): Hey, guys!
The Gravedigger: Guys!
Guys guys guys!
Apheori (GM): Rhu: The glass disappears and you fall through into the shop.
Rhu: What's up, Gravy?
The Gravedigger: This doesn't smell like peppermint.
Rhu Man, this glass is so ---
The Gravedigger: It smells like.... illuuuusion.
Greibel: Everybody, I know I'm an outcast and a substance abuser but listen to me
Rhu falls through glass
The Gravedigger: I tried burying one once.
It was hard.
Radek perks up immediately.
Rhu: Er
Radek: Illusions?!
Rhu: Glass doesn't just ... disappear, does it?
The Gravedigger: I swear on my best shovel.
Greibel: I may be hallucinating, but I saw many dead, lying here as though in repose
The Gravedigger waves his best shovel.
Greibel: These may be the illusions of a madman
Rhu stands up and walks over to Gravy
Greibel: I think they are impartions from a cosmic force beyond our own
Something happened here
Rhu: Something's wrong with the glass. It just ... vanished.
Greibel: And we are tasked to find out what that was
The Gravedigger: That sounds illlusory.
Rhu taps on the glass at the bookstore Gravy is standing outside of.
The Gravedigger: Radek! You can do magic, right?
Do... something?
Greibel: Well, gravedigger, you and I are wont to disagree
but I believe that these corpses did not simply vanish
Frezak (GM): I'm gonna just start poking random things with my shovel.
Greibel: Someone used to live here
Did you not notice the lack of skeletons?
Bodies?
Rotting flesh?
Radek: Of course I can do magic.
Apheori (GM): The Gravedigger pokes a bunch of things with his shovel. They seem like... things.
Greibel: Is this place not immaculately clean for a highly populated area suddenly abandoned?
Apheori (GM): Solid things.
The Gravedigger: Maybe they were all buried, Greibel.
BURIAL IS A THING THAT HAPPENS.
Ganelon: I will do magic.
Frezak (GM): DO MAGIC.
Ganelon: With the intent to remove illusions.
Alright?
Rhu taps the glass outside the bookstore again.
Greibel: Gravedigger I do not deny your skill at burial
Apheori (GM): It's glass.
Greibel: Which is why you must know that burial is a complicated process
Apheori (GM): Gan: Do it.
Greibel: To bury all those alive in this thriving metropolis would take weeks
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+10
(
17
)
+10
=
27
Greibel: Much longer than the time since the blackouts
Frezak (GM): Maybe it was someone that was REALLY GOOD at burying.
Rhu: Huh.
Ganelon: I'm so terrified of the first time this is going to fair.
Greibel: And it would leave a societal trace in these buildings not felt now
Ganelon: Fail*
Frezak (GM): That could do lots of people at once!
Apheori (GM): Several dead bodies appear as if out of nowhere, though not nearly as many as Greibel saw before.
The Gravedigger: Maybe it was someone that was REALLY GOOD at burying.
That could do lots of people at once!
Rhu: HOLY CRAP
Greibel: There! Do you see them?!
The Gravedigger: Huh.
Radek: Bloody illusions.
The Gravedigger: Dead people.
IT'S SHOVEL TIME.
Radek: Ask me sooner next time.
Greibel: You called me a fool. I called me a....well a fool also, but still,. I knew what was going on
Apheori (GM): A large fish also rolls down the stairs.
The Gravedigger: hey!
I just called you a druggie.
Frezak (GM): How large?
Apheori (GM): Almost gravedigger-sized.
Rhu: Gah! Fish!
Frezak (GM): WOW.
THAT IS A BIG FISH.
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Frezak (GM): Anyone in danger of being crushed by the rolling fish?
Rhu: Does the fish smell bad?
Apheori (GM): It smells like a fish, but it's not rotting yet.
It's still coming down the stairs and you all probably saw it.
It's not going very quickly.
Greibel: Gravedigger: I take no offense to your insinuation. It's true after all. However, AHHHHHH FISH
Frezak (GM): RUUUN
Ganelon: A living fish?
The Gravedigger: FLEE
THE FISH HAVE COME
Apheori (GM): It's dead.
Frezak (GM): I will evade the fish.
Apheori (GM): It continues to roll slowly down the stairs.
...it stops at the base.
Frezak (GM): I'll poke it.
Bravely.
Apheori (GM): With your shovel?
Rhu: WAIT
Frezak (GM): No, i'll use my spade for this.
Apheori (GM): The spade pierces the fish's scales.
Rhu: It might be pressurized. Like a sperm whale.
Apheori (GM): It jiggles a bit.
Frezak (GM): WOW.
Apheori (GM): Like a fish.
Frezak (GM): THAT IS A SOGGY FISH.
The Gravedigger: This fish is lacking in structural integrity.
Gaurav: haha
The fish sits there.
The Gravedigger leans near the fish head.
The Gravedigger: HELLO? IS SOMEONE IN THERE?
The fish does nothing.
Frezak (GM): With my 18 Con lungs.
The Gravedigger: I think it's empty, guys.
Frezak (GM): Does the fishflesh look weird at all?
The fish emits a loud belching noise and collapses slightly.
The Gravedigger: It's farting, guys!
Apheori (GM): It looks like fish.
Fairly ordinary.
Rhu: It's how they communicate.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: Roll a d20.
Frezak (GM): Do we know if this size is ordinary for this planet?
Apheori (GM): Greibel or Radek may. Is there a random knowledge skill?
Greibel: RIGHT!
rolling 1d20
(
15
)
=
15
Rhu: Nature? Streetwise (at a stretch)?
Ganelon: You can't really be trained in random knowledge.
Greibel: Yeah, it might be nature
But more likely a more scientific deal
Apheori (GM): Streetwise or nature. Add whatever's higher and roll.
Ganelon: Nature for sure.
Or Heal.
Rhu: I have a decent nature for some reason. Hmm.
Apheori (GM): Market values for fish is important.
Greibel: Greibel is in tune with nature, and can probably relate to it on most planets, but he's still not very versed beyond his own planet and at first things might be weird to him on other worlds
Ganelon: Heal because it involves medical knowledge.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+6 nature check to examine the fish and recollect information on local fishes
(
4
)
+6
=
10
Apheori (GM): Whatever roll something.
It looks like a fish and seems fairly normal as far as you can tell.
Greibel: Well it's a big fish then
Rhu walks over to the closest corpse and examines that instead.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: Roll.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+11 perception check to examine corpse
(
16
)
+11
=
27
Greibel: Where do me and, was it Rhu, me and Rhu or Radek or whoever I stayed with come froM?
Apheori (GM): Somewhere else. >.>
Greibel: I ROLLED BEFORE
Rhu: You stayed iwth me, I think.
Apheori (GM): That was something else!
Greibel: Do I need a 20 again?
Being high is hard work
Apheori (GM): Yeah, and add a relevant skill. This is about the fish.
Greibel: Okay I stayed wit Rhu
Oh okay
What about the fish?
What's relevant?
Nature?
Frezak (GM): Why can't I roll Nature?
Rhu: Do a nature check. You're a hippie, that should be your strong suit!
Apheori (GM): Rhu: The corpse looks like it might have asphyxiated, but there's no indication how.
Frezak (GM): BECAUSE IT IS A FISH.
Greibel: Nature IS my strong suit
But what am I rolling?
D20 plus nature?
Apheori (GM): Frezak: The dead elf corpse, not the fish.
Rhu was looking at the other bodies.
Greibel: Yeah.
Rhu: This corpse looked like it asphyxiated. Maybe the fish fell on it ... before?
Frezak (GM): Oh.
Apheori (GM): Snrk.
Radek: Does it smell like fish?
Frezak (GM): I'm gonna go see if there are more fish at the top of the stairs?
Apheori (GM): Rhu: IT doesn't smell like fish.
Rhu smells the corpse he's next to.
Frezak (GM): Maybe there is a fish hive.
Rhu: ...
if there's a Fish King here, I'm leaving.
Apheori (GM): The gravedigger goes up the stairs.
Gravedigger: Roll a d20.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20
(
14
)
=
14
Apheori (GM): Okay.
You come to the top of the stairs and find more shops and offices and things.
There aren't any bodies or fish, but there are some potted plants.
Frezak (GM): Wait.
Was the fish... damp?
Greibel: Sorry my roll thing
Apheori (GM): Nope.
Frezak (GM): A dry fish?
Apheori (GM): Yup.
Greibel:
rolling 1d20 + 11
(
7
)
+11
=
18
Apheori (GM): Greibel: Damn.
Frezak (GM): Can I seek the smell of fish? To see how far it goes on this level?
Apheori (GM): Sure.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+8
(
19
)
+8
=
27
Greibel: Apparently the smell is pretty weak...
Frezak (GM): NOSTRIL POWER.
Apheori (GM): The fish moved through the air! The air has smell!
Rhu: Everywhere probably smells like fish now.
Apheori (GM): And the gravedigger follows the smell into a nearby shop.
...which is missing.
Rhu: Gravy: don't go too far! Guys: we should go up after him.
Apheori (GM): The floor inside just gives way to open air outside the building.
The Gravedigger: GUYS. THE FISH SMELL COMES FROM A SHOP WITH A BIG HOLE.
Apheori (GM): (The door is open.)
Bear Soup Guy: Uh-oh...
Rhu walks up the stairs after Gravy.
Frezak (GM): I'll peek out and see if there are nay fish crawling up the wall.
Bear Soup Guy: Domestic violence upstairs....maybe
Apheori (GM): No fish appear to be crawling up the wall.
Frezak (GM): Hmm.
Ganelon: I've got no reason to stick around on the lower level.
Bear Soup Guy: Hold on, I'm gonna call someone
Ganelon: I'll head up.
Frezak (GM): GHOSTBUSTERS
Apheori (GM): Gan: Roll a d20.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
13
)
=
13
Apheori (GM): You see some strange shimmering in the air as you go up the stairs, but it disappears when you pass.
Frezak (GM): Maybe you should try to dissilude every new place.
Ganelon: I suspect illusions, yeah.
Apheori (GM) giggles.
Frezak (GM): Can i try to smell more illusions? And would I have a bonus for knowing the smell i'm looking for?
Apheori (GM): No bonus, but yes.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+8
(
10
)
+8
=
18
My trusty nose.
Always up for some nasality.
Apheori (GM): You can't tell one way or another.
Frezak (GM): Hmm.
The Gravedigger: I can't smell any illllluuuusions over this fish smell. Sorry, guys.
Ganelon: I see everything the same way he does, right? Same shop with a hole and all that?
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Rhu: We need to assume that everything is illusory here.
Ganelon: I'll start by putting a foot down past where the floor would normally be.
Rhu carefully edges along the wall.
The Gravedigger: WAIT.
Frezak (GM): I will poke the ground with my spade.
Apheori (GM): Your foot stops where the floor would be.
Frezak (GM): And push the skinny old man away.
Rhu: ... huh
Apheori (GM): The spade, however, goes through without resistence.
Rhu: HUH
Ganelon: More grumbling about illusions ensues.
The Gravedigger: Waht.
This is perplexing.
Frezak (GM): I'll pull out an axe.
Ganelon: Do you know what it means to "take 5" in D&D, Apheori?
Apheori (GM): Nope!
Frezak (GM): And drop it onto the space where the shovel went through.
Bear Soup Guy: Sorry about that I had to call 911 about domestic violence
Literally
Frezak (GM): What.
Ganelon: Spend 5 in-game minutes to do a skill check with a fixed roll of 10.
Frezak (GM): I thought you were talking about fish.
Apheori (GM): RAHB: Hopefully it wasn't the woman doing it. They'll arrest the man.
Bear Soup Guy: And I'm also drunk
Frezak (GM): WHOOOO
Bear Soup Guy: No it's the man
Apheori (GM): Good.
Gaurav: RAHB: Ouch. Hope things turn out well.
Bear Soup Guy: I've heard indications the man is a shithole but never anthing evident enough
Apheori (GM): Okay, so the axe clatters and lands on nothing.
Ganelon: Also, my bad, it's called taking 10.
Apheori (GM): Ganelon: Hmm.
Bear Soup Guy: I think they're lulled into enough of a sense of security now where they feel I won't repot anytthing
Aaaaaaaaand my typijng is shot
Ganelon: I can just *not* do it if you prefer.
Gaurav: Ganelon: What's a "fixed roll of 10"?
Apheori (GM): You can do it with some things.
Not others.
Ganelon: As in, rather than a 1d20, it's just 10.
Bear Soup Guy: Right so they won't trace it to me and stuff so
Ganelon: But it takes time to do.
Bear Soup Guy: Back to playing I gues
Apheori (GM): Gan: If you do it, Greibel has to roll a sanity check.
Frezak (GM): I'll take my axe back.
Greibel: Give me a reader's digest of what happened, I had an acid flachback
Gaurav: BSG: take care, dude.
Frezak (GM): And be perplexed.
Ganelon: I'll pass for now.
And just do the more immediate un-illusioning.
Rhu: Greibel: Gravy followed the fish smell up to the second floor and into a storefront which, ah, doesn't exist.
Frezak (GM): Flashcast that shit, dude.
Bear Soup Guy: Nah I ain't leaving
Ain't much I can do
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+10
(
11
)
+10
=
21
Apheori (GM): What was the last thing you saw?
Bear Soup Guy: 911 was cool about it though. hell they're probably here now for all I know
Rhu: Radek stepped into the non-existent storefront and his foot made contact with an invisible floor.
Bear Soup Guy: Oh that's cool
Rhu: We are now investigating the nature of this invisible floor. And rolling sanity checks. Which are a bad, bad sign.
Apheori (GM): Radek casts the thingy and it seems to... not entirely work. Nothing really happens. On the other hand, he does notice that the shop is partially there. Sort of.
Greibel: I mean, Oh that's far out
Apheori (GM): If he looks at it right.
Greibel: Shop Of Illusions!
The Gravedigger rolls his shoulders.
The Gravedigger: Okay, guys, stand back.
Let's sort this thing out.
Frezak (GM): okay, so.
Rhu: Two options: we could hold one end of the rope and let someone else walk into this non-shop shop with the other end.
Or two: Greibel turns himself into a spider and does the same thing, but with silk.
Frezak (GM): My encounter power, 'roots of stone', creates a burst of rippling earth.
Rhu: (there might be other options)
Frezak (GM): I would like to use that power to shake up the shop floor.
Rhu: oooh
Frezak (GM): See if we can break the illusion Gravy-style.
Ganelon: By breaking the floor?
Rhu: Might it cause bits of the floor to break? If some break and some are invisible, things could get ... complicated.
Ganelon: Yeah, I think Radek will stand back at this proposition.
Frezak (GM): Just the edge, where it looks broken.
Greibel: I will totally turn into a spiderr
Rhu: Can Greibel turn himself into a hummingbird and go ... hover over things?
WAIT
Greibel: If that's what needs to happen because spiderrs seriously give me quite a rush
Rhu: Can we ask SHIP to fly over and hover outside the building? And use its sensors to poke at the invisible shop?
Frezak (GM): I think it's sulking.
Radek: Now if only you could turn into a productive member of society.
Ganelon: (My own opinion of Greibel is significantly higher)
Apheori (GM): Hee.
The Gravedigger: Seriously.
I'm up for breaking this shit.
Ganelon: I did sign on for playing the mean old guy, though.
Frezak (GM): We're only one floor up.
I can take that fall, no problem.
Apheori (GM): There's a significantly longer drop.
Frezak (GM): What?
Apheori (GM): The lot, it turns out, was several floors up. Underneath the lack of shop there are some other towers and ocean.
Frezak (GM): Ah.
Anything we can tie me to?
A nice pillar, for instance?
Apheori (GM): A handrail on a wall nearby.
Aren't any pillars.
Rhu: o.0
Frezak (GM): Does it look like it would hold my weight?
Apheori (GM): A couple of stakes in the ground.
Rhu: I suggest we tie the lightest member of the party on to you.
Apheori (GM): It could.
Frezak (GM): How much of a could?
Rhu: Anything on the ceiling? A ceiling fan hook?
Ganelon: ...What good would that do?
Frezak (GM): I am really heavy.
Apheori (GM): There's also a bridge a few feet away above where the shop had been, if you can grapple it.
Or maybe go to it the next floor up.
Frezak (GM): Well, I have 50 feet of rope.
Anyone with an adventurer kit has the same.
And I HAVE a grappling hook.
Rhu: We can also tie you with multiple ropes. But I still think we should get Greibel to do the flying-animal-or-insect thing.
Frezak (GM): Sure, if he can.
Rhu: it's safer, simpler, and -- given that BSG is drunk -- much more amusing.
unless the entire room collapses or something
Frezak (GM): If the DM says yes, sounds safer.
Apheori (GM): Go for it.
Frezak (GM): TURN INTO A PIGEON.
A HUNTING PIGEON OF PREY.
Gaurav: haahaha
Bear Soup Guy: Okay sorry I did other thingd
Should I turn into a flying animal?
Frezak (GM): yeah,and poke around.
Gaurav: What about dragonfly? Excellent hovering capability, dragonflies.
Apheori (GM): Mass conversion.
Remember mass conversion.
Frezak (GM): A swarm of pigeons.
Frezak (GM): A SWARM.
OF PIGEONS.
A ROYAL PIGEON SWARM.
Frezak (GM): DO IT NOW.
Rhu: That is the best idea anybody has ever had ever
Frezak (GM): NOW.
Rhu: I am in awe
I need to sit down
Rhu sits down against the wall opposite the "shopfront"
Apheori (GM): Rhu: Roll a d20
Bear Soup Guy: I can't turn into swarms because I'm not trained in stuff
Rhu: Crap
rolling 1d20
(
11
)
=
11
Bear Soup Guy: But I'll totally turn into a finch or somethintg
Frezak (GM): Sure you can.
Swarm druids are just better at it.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Frezak (GM): IF YOU DO NOT TURN INTO A PIGEON SWARM I WILL FIND YOU AND MAKE YOU EAT YOUR LEGS.
Gaurav: 0.0
Bear Soup Guy: oh okay
So I can do swarm but I'm not great at it but that's mostly a combat thing
Frezak (GM): yarr.
Greibel turns into a swarm of pigeons
Frezak (GM): WHOOOO
Apheori (GM): Several of the pigeons immediately fly into the wall and fall on the ground, dazed.
The Gravedigger: HOLY FUCK, GUYS.
GREIBEL JUST GOT EATEN BY PIGEONS.
Rhu rubs my eyes
Rhu: err, his eyes
Greibel: WHAT NO I AM PIGEONS
Frezak (GM): That is the best line yet, BSG.
Greibel: +D
Ganelon: I have no comment other than this one, to tell you that I am amused.
Bear Soup Guy: As am I
I have to take a minute to order some e-liquid and the I am completely devoted to this
Frezak (GM): Can we find tins of soup or paint or flour or some liquid or powder in any of the shops?
Apheori (GM): So what'll you have this swarm of pigeons do? Dance?
Gaurav: e-liquid?
Apheori (GM): Frezak: Some of them might have some.
Do you search?
Frezak (GM): I will go look for such a thing.
Apheori (GM): Okay. You find some.
Frezak (GM): Awesome.
Apheori (GM): Paint and floor cleaner.
Roll a d20.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20
(
9
)
=
9
Apheori (GM): Okay.
You come back with paint and floor cleaner and notice nothing odd.
Aside from the swarm of pigeons.
Frezak (GM): Once the pigeons have cleared, I want to throw paint all over the inside of the mysterious shop.
Apheori (GM): Since the pigeons are just swarming, perhaps you might as well do it now. >.<
Frezak (GM): Sure.
GO, PAINT.
Apheori (GM): You dump paint on where the floor should be.
Some of the paint hits the floor and spreads, showing where it is.
Some of it goes right through it.
Some of it hits, spreads, and then suddenly falls.
The Gravedigger: oh. Crap.
Apheori (GM): You also get some paint on a chair.
Rhu: Why did it do that? And why does it work with paint, and not with spades?
The Gravedigger: You mentioned portals, Radek?
Apheori (GM): It's INVISIBLE.
Rhu: ...
oh crap
The Gravedigger: I think this place is all phasing.
It's.. going between places.
Radek: I have to agree.
The Gravedigger: Things are real and not real.
Both.
its... SCHRODINGER'S SHOP.
Shit's fucked up.
Radek slaps the Gravedigger across the back of the head.
Frezak (GM): can you reach?
My head?
Apheori (GM): If he jumps, sure.
Radek: That isn't how Shrodinger's experiment worked.
Frezak (GM): Also you might as well punch a wall.
The Gravedigger: Maybe you should tell the Company this.
I have made a discovery.
Tell them i'm super smart.
Radek: Valman was the first one to perform in-depth studies into the nature of phasing and other dimensional instabilities.
Hmph.
The Gravedigger: I DISCOVERY ABOUT HERE.
GO DO THE TALKING THING.
Radek: Bah! Fine!
Ganelon: These are just written reports, right?
Frezak (GM): Else I will make a lung attack Vs Fort.
Apheori (GM): Yeah, basically.
Frezak (GM): hey, can we record a video?
Apheori (GM): It's like this app where you fill in some fields and put notes.
Frezak (GM): And have me dump the other stuff?
Apheori (GM): You can record a video.
Frezak (GM): And smile and wave?
Apheori (GM): Sure.
Frezak (GM): because I totally want to do that now.
Rhu: :)
Ganelon: Let's do that.
Frezak (GM): I will.
I'll be waving and grinning and pointing at myself and the floor.
Gaurav: Remember when I said I should really go to bed? Because it was a quarter to 3? That was an hour and ten minutes ago.
So once this video is recorded I am outta here.
Frezak (GM): Oops >.>
Gaurav: Feel free to keep going -- this stuff is awesome! I can read the transcript afterwards.
No no I said it was a quarter to 4 and it is now a quarter to 5. I dub tomorrow Coffee Day.
Ganelon: I wouldn't mind stopping afterwards. It's not exactly too late for me to stay up, but I you needn't miss out and I do have other things I could do.
Bear Soup Guy: I came back and read the stuff but now I'm running back to the ship for the bathroom
Gaurav: I'm also gone all the way 'til Dec 30, so if you're going to play before then, you'll have to do it without me anyway. I really don't mind! The transcripts are going to be awesome.
Apheori (GM): One of you may want to mention how there are probably bathrooms here.
Frezak (GM): No, not really.
I'm busy doing science.
Rhu: (mutters) Don't split the party ... (loudly, to Greibel) THERE MIGHT BE A LOO IN HERE SOMEWHERE
Apheori (GM): The Gravedigger doing science. This is awesome.
The Gravedigger: QUIET.
I AM DOING SCIENCE.
Rhu: Man, we could not have picked a better building for Gravy to ply his trade. IT'S ALL HOLES!
The Gravedigger: is the thing recording yet?
Rhu looks for the red light
Radek: Go ahead.
The Gravedigger waves at the camera thing.
The Gravedigger then splashes the stuff over the floor.
Rhu: So unless the secretary is yet another in a series of illusions, we've now achieved something nobody else has, which is that we landed and sent back a message without dying first.
Frezak (GM): And waving and pointing excitedly.
Apheori (GM): The floating paint, including the stuff on the floor, all falls through at once.
Frezak (GM): Also smiling a lot.
Radek: Hm..
The Gravedigger: THIS IS HOLE SCIENCE.
Apheori (GM): On the chair, I mean.
Radek: Quiet down, they can hear you just fine.
Frezak (GM): I want to unwind some rope, tie an handaxe to it, and swing it around the room to see if it hooks around the chair.
Rhu leans over to see if I can see wehre the paint has fallen to
Apheori (GM): Most of it seems to have hit a roof below.
The rest probably went in the ocean.
Rhu: ... why would you build a roof before a room? Even an invisible room?
Can we see the sky through the "top" of the room?
Apheori (GM): IT'S A FUTURE CITY THING.
Frezak (GM): FUTURE.
Apheori (GM): FUTURE.
Gaurav: haha. The stylish thing is to have a roof below a floor below a roof below a floor.
Apheori (GM): Rob: Roll a d20.
Gaurav: It's how you know you've arrived.
Bear Soup Guy: THE ECIG GUYS CHARGE A LOT FOR SHIPPING AND THEN ALSO I READ STUFF
Radek: We believe this space to be part of a dimensional instability of some sort.
Bear Soup Guy: Oh me roll a d20
rolling 1d20
(
15
)
=
15
Apheori (GM): Damn you.
Radek: The floor seems to be changing states between tangible and intangible constantly.
Gaurav: "It's a creepy floor", Rhu adds helpfully.
The Gravedigger: It's here and not.
THis is going to make moving around here very difficult.
Because of holes.
Greibel: We just have to perceive man
Gaurav: This is going to be a minority opinion, but how do we know this isn't some kookie "illusion for the paying public" stunt this mall was doing? Maybe we should go back and focus on the dead guys?
Greibel: It will be hard but valuable
Apheori (GM): Gaurav: Your guy should mention that.
Greibel: You have no idea how happy Gravy is.
This is all he hoped and more.
All he needs now is some to bury.
Gaurav: oops, sorry
Frezak (GM): OOPS
SOORY.
Bear Soup Guy: Guarav: The paying public generally doesn't want to be fooled though
Frezak (GM): I stole Greibel >.>
Radek: That will be in the report.
Rhu: Wait a minute. how do we know this isn't some kookie "illusion for the paying public" stunt this mall was doing? Maybe we should go back and focus on the dead guys?
Bear Soup Guy: This seems like more than just a gimmick
The Gravedigger: Yes, dead guys!
I'll dig a hole.
Frezak (GM): Actually.
I could tell how long they've been dead.
Bear Soup Guy: OH NO I WAS STOLEN
That was odd
Apheori (GM): Excellent idea.
Rhu: That's true, but ... maybe a crazy scientist did a thing. Maybe another Gravedigger was researching advanced digging, or something. We don't know that this weird room has anything to do with anything apart from the fish.
Frezak (GM): I'll go down and fo that.
Apheori (GM): Hmm, Greibel is still pigeons, isn't he?
Frezak (GM): He is always pigeons.
Rhu: Greibel: come perch on my finger.
Frezak (GM): You'll need a big finger.
Rhu: A Flock of Pigeons.
Frezak (GM): To have a pigeon swarm perch on.
Rhu: just the one to start with?
or do they have to travel together?
Greibel: I guess I'm still pigeons
Frezak (GM): I'll go examine the dead guys for deadness.
Greibel: I forgot I was pigeons but I was the whole time
Apheori (GM): Pigeons: Roll a d20.
Greibel: r/ 1d20
err
rolling 1d20
(
6
)
=
6
Apheori (GM): The dead guys appear to have been dead varying amounts of time - some only a few hours or days, others months, others dessicated entirely, probably preserved by the building's environmental control.
Rhu: Damn
Apheori (GM): They're mostly humans and elves, but some of them are also races you don't recognise, possibly subraces.
The Gravedigger: These dead guys don't have consistent times of deadness.
Bear Soup Guy: Does everybody see all of them now
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You fly out the door into the shop that isn't there, bounce off the far wall, and then wonder where everyone went.
Everyone sees about the same number now, though there are less than you saw initially.
Greibel: Aaaaaah what
Rhu: Dude, we can see your corpses now. Calm down.
Apheori (GM): You failed a sanity check. AS A FLOCK OF PIGEONS.
Greibel: Okay, I have experience with being alone and pensive
Apheori (GM) points and laughs.
Frezak (GM): THE SWARM IS MAAAAAD
Greibel: Can I turn back to elf man?
Frezak (GM): What kind of clothes are they wearing?
Apheori (GM): You can.
Greibel: Cause yeah
The pigeons don't seem to be sane
Lokshmi: Get back inside first.
Greibel: Okay I'm me again and wandering
Rhu: ...
Lokshmi: You... idiot.
Rhu: Did you just turn back into an elf before you left the dreaded room of emptiness?
Frezak (GM): WHo's the god talking to?
Greibel: I think I left and then turned to elf
From shcok value
shock*
Lokshmi: No. You didn't. I had to pull you in.
(Talking to Greibel.)
Apheori (GM): And you realise there's a cat talking to you.
Greibel: Whhaaaaaaaaaat Loksmit
Apheori (GM): You probably don't recognise her.
Rhu: So, the rest of us are downstairs and we can't see all this, right?
Greibel: AAAAAAGH MY MIND
Apheori (GM): Right.
Rhu: Oh look a corpse (examines corpse)
Ganelon: Yeah.
Greibel: What do you need to impart to me locksmith?
Frezak (GM): Did Radek send the report?
Lokshmi: Locksmith?
Apheori (GM): You sent it, yeah.
Frezak (GM): Also, what are the dead guys wearing? What kind of clothes?
Apheori (GM): Then wandered off.
Rhu: We definitely recorded a report. Not sure if we sent it.
Greibel: You say tomato, I say nebula
Apheori (GM): Ordinary to unusual clothes. But there's a fair amount of variation on most worlds so it doesn't seem too odd.
Frezak (GM): Right.
Lokshmi narrows her eyes and watches Greibel suspiciously.
Ganelon: I'll send the report after we have footage of the floor having stuff on it, then becoming intangible.
Which I guess has happened.
Presumably I'm just filling in the written part.
Gaurav: Okay, 1hr 30 mins after my last I-gotta-go pronouncement means I absolutely definitely have to go.
Apheori (GM): Right, then.
Frezak (GM): IS THIS THE END?
Gaurav: This has been waaaaaay more exciting and creepy than I thought it was going to be.
Frezak (GM): Also, sorry for the late night, Rave >.>
Gaurav: no no keep going! I'll read the transcripts once I get a stable internet connection on Dec 30.
Ganelon: See you later!
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Gaurav: and I'll see you all after
Frezak (GM): have funs!
HAPPY HOLES, RAVE.
Apheori (GM): He will be important at some point.
I dunno if he's important yet.
Gaurav: The late night was worth it ^_^ have fun everybody! Take care BSG re: upstairs and all that!
I will have the best of holes
Apheori (GM): Take care.
Gaurav: my character sheet is at https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u/19429772/dnd-skype/Rhu.pdf my religion check is +7 my perception is +11 and everybody within 5 sq of me gets a perception of +1
that should be all you need to know
byeeeeeee
Frezak (GM): Oh, elfy bonuses!
Nice!
Apheori (GM): Can someone reformat that?
Also: Do we want to keep going?
Frezak (GM): I do.
But I think Gan had things?
Ganelon: Hm.
Well, yes.
Things that could be delayed.
Frezak (GM): heh.
By how much?
Apheori (GM): Dammit, and I forgot what Lokshmi was actually going to say to the party.
Bloody stoned Greibel and his causing her to show up too soon...
Ganelon: I'm juggling a lot of conversations and other such things.
Frezak (GM): Up to you, Gan.
Ganelon: Then I'll have to politely request that we continue this another day.
Apheori (GM): When shall it be?
Frezak (GM): I'm busy 'till about the 27th.
Ganelon: Well, the 25th is probably going to require me to go do family stuff.
Apheori (GM): 27th works for me.
Ganelon: Other than that, just not on Fridays ('cause that's when I work on details for my own D&D campaign) or Sundays (Frezak's campaign) are fine. Any time.
'Course, the 27th is a Friday.
Well, I can play, just not late.
Bear Soup Guy: Okay I came back
Apheori (GM): Rob: 27th work for you?
Ganelon: Like, really late. Two hours from now would be cutting things close.
Three would be unacceptably late.
Bear Soup Guy: Apheori: no unfortunatelu, well maybe
I have to go to have christmas stuff with my dad and then stay at my sister's house and watch her dogs
Very early 28th is good but only barely
Apheori (GM): Can't you online with dogs?
Frezak (GM): Might as well leave it for the 30th, then.
Bear Soup Guy: We should all just reconvene after these bloody holidays
Frezak (GM): When Rave is back.
Apheori (GM): Aye, mayhap. >.<
Bear Soup Guy: I CAN online with dogs
Frezak (GM): Revolting.
Bear Soup Guy: If we're doing about the time we are now
On saturday
Friday is no good at all
Apheori (GM): Can everyone do saturday?
Bear Soup Guy: Neither is....tomorrow or any other day until fridau
Frezak (GM): I can any day from the 27th.
Bear Soup Guy: I can do saturday yeah
For a few hours but I can't promise past 12 PST
Which would be 2 Colorado time
Ganelon: I can.
Apheori (GM): Well, that'll give us a few hours, at least, no?
Bear Soup Guy: At least yeah
More build to the story
And then in January we can really plow into the action
Ganelon: More opportunities to be grouchy.
And a know-it-all.
Frezak (GM): MORE HOLE SCIENCE
Ganelon: If anyone ever calls Radek on that device, he's going to say "Genius here."
Bear Soup Guy: HOLE SCIENCE
Apheori (GM): Yes!
Bear Soup Guy: I will talk to Radek a lot
Ganelon: I'm quite satisfied with how this has gone so far
Frezak (GM): Gravy will shout "I KNOW HOLE THINGS"
And just blot out any of Radek's attempt to speak.
Bear Soup Guy: Because he's most similar to my sensibilitieis
Apheori (GM): Heh.
Ganelon: I even got to complain to someone who didn't care and couldn't solve my problems like an authentic old person.
Apheori (GM): Hee.
Bear Soup Guy: I got to not pay attention a lot of times like an authentic hippie
Ganelon: Something for everyone.
Apheori (GM): I'd say this actually worked fairly well.
Ganelon: Holes, receptionists, and tripping balls.
Frezak (GM): It did, Names.
Apheori (GM): Not that I'm sure what 'well' actually looks like...
Frezak (GM): Wellll
I could link you my campaign? >.>
That's the only game example I have >.>
Apheori (GM): I'm not sure I'd get around to reading it.
Frezak (GM): FINE THEN
BE THAT WAY
Apheori (GM): SORRY.
Ganelon: I consider Magellan to be the absolute paragon of campaign wellness.
Frezak (GM): Ehhhh.
Ganelon: Okay, Katie kind of slows things down a lot.
Frezak (GM): JUST A BIT.
Ganelon: But I love the talking and the combat and the characters and the setting.
Just... everything.
Frezak (GM): WHAT.
YOU PREFER THAT OVER HARICOT?
YOU BASTARD.
Ganelon: And I hate Year's House but that's totally fine because it's the point.
No, Haricot is great!
Frezak (GM): AND SCISSORS.
AND THE GHOSTS.
AND THE DRUNK DUDE.
I HATE YOU.
Sort of.
Ish.
Frezak (GM): Well.
Ganelon: I'm interested in seeing how combat plays out in this campaign, though.
Apheori (GM): So am I. O_o
Ganelon: I actually like the idea of Radek having a rifle much more than I originally thought.
Frezak (GM): Well, we have a fairly balanced party.
A bit low on damage, perhaps.
Bear Soup Guy: I'm interested in the whole thing
Ganelon: It was probably a result of me being able to visualize just how insanely long his "no penalty" range was.
Bear Soup Guy: This is so much more than I expected already
Frezak (GM): i'll be using an at-will to slow that should help things.
Bear Soup Guy: This is my first real D&D experience and it has been fantabulous
Apheori (GM): Mine too!
Bear Soup Guy: +D
err
=D
Frezak (GM): You might want the Monster Manuals, Names.
For mosnters.
Apheori (GM): Good point.
Frezak (GM): You can always rename them.
Ganelon: I can send her those.
Frezak (GM): Excellent idea.
Apheori (GM): We never even got to the chickens.
Frezak (GM): Oh dear.
Bear Soup Guy: Gan you are so cool
Thanks for being so cool
Apheori (GM): You guys are all cool.
Frezak (GM): Ehhhhh
I'm not.
And, no offence.
Gan is not someone I would label 'cool'.
he knows to much D&D to be cool.
We're cursed.
Apheori (GM): Pfft.
Frezak (GM): To not be cool.
Tainted.
CORRUPTED.
But that's cool.
Apheori (GM): You're like uncyclopedia admins: Cool and sexy even if everyone hates you.
Ganelon: I appreciate the flattery.
Frezak (GM): oh, I know I'm sexy and hated.
Ganelon: But I am definitely not sexy.
Apheori (GM): And cool.
Frezak (GM): Ehhh.
Bear Soup Guy: Coooooooooool
Ganelon: I'm fine with being called cool.
Bear Soup Guy: I'm so sexy and hated they gave me the other thing
God my typing is shot
Gan, you are cool
You may be sexy in our wildest dreams
Frezak (GM): ehhhh
Bear Soup Guy: But at least in reality you are very much cool
Frezak (GM): Gan.
I will try my bestest to make my campaign better than Mr.K.'s.
Ganelon: You're doing fine, Frezak.
It may very well just be the character dynamic that you and I have going that makes me enjoy his more.
Frezak (GM): ohhh.
Ganelon: Because really, Freya is the greatest.
Frezak (GM): Welll.
Ganelon: No. She is the greatest.
Frezak (GM): When you say 'greatest'.
Apheori (GM): Guys, let's get the non-campaign stuff back in skype.
Frezak (GM): Right.
Ganelon: Yes, let's.
Bear Soup Guy: I already love my character dynamic with everyone
Apheori (GM): It's hard enough keepin track of backlog already. XD
Bear Soup Guy: Gravedigger and I are going to get into some shit and that will effect our direction and that's fantastic
As far as I'm concerned every party should have some polar opposite characters
Apheori (GM) drags RAHB back to skype.
Bear Soup Guy: Mine is so passive unless we're beijng attacked and GD is so aggressive
Oh right, back to skype 

Session 2

Wen: creepy
okay, it works.
rolling 1d20+4
(
20
)
+4
=
24
Apheori (GM): Ohai.
You rolled a 20!
Wen: yes! \o/
Apheori (GM): Can you change wwho you're talking to with the dropdown menu?
Er, talking as.
Aziraphale bites SHIP
Wen: yep, it works.
SHIP: Oh, it's lonesome being a poor neglected ship.
And then someone comes and bits me?
Oh, I do feel so depressed.
Aziraphale: I wouldn't mind some crumpets and tea right now.
Rhu: Tea? TEA?!
Apheori (GM): Actually I have no idea how Rhu feels about tea.
Apheori (GM) totally just stole Gaurav's character.
Wen: er
okay, yes, that explains it
Apheori (GM): GMs can do that.
Wen: I think I'd better stop polluting the in game timeline now >.>
Apheori (GM): Well, you got the basics, so... whee! Tomorrow.
Wen: yes. Tomorrow.
Ganelon: I'm here.
Though, if you're in danger of falling asleep already, this is going to be a short session.
Apheori (GM): Starting should wake me up.
Frezak (GM): She just needs adrenaline.
Poke yourself in the boob with a needle.
Bear Soup Guy: Like in that OTHER episode of Firefly
Frezak (GM): What OTHER episode?
Bear Soup Guy: The eighth one?
Out Of Gas
Frezak (GM): OH.
Adrenaline needle.
Right.
Bear Soup Guy: Where Mal is dying so he STABS HIMSELF IN THE HEART WITH A MASSIVE NEEDLE
Frezak (GM): It's a really big needle.
Bear Soup Guy: Because that's what I'd do if I were dying
Frezak (GM): It's like a tiny sword.
Or spear.
Bear Soup Guy: Yes
Frezak (GM): 2D4 HEART HOLE DAMAGE.
Bear Soup Guy: :D
Frezak (GM): Also, GAME.
I have holes to make.
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Holes.
Where were we all?
Bear Soup Guy: I don't remember much after I turned into pigeons
Apheori (GM): Griebel turned into pigeons, lost his mind, flapped around and ran into a wall, turned elf again over potentially empty floor, and then this strange talking cat appeared and dragged him back inside. Out of the there but not room.
Ganelon: Yeah, he was talking to a god when we stopped. The rest of us... just went outside, didn't we?
Or at least downstairs?
Apheori (GM): I believe Radek, Rhu, and the Gravedigger had gone back downstairs and were checking out the bodies, or something?
Bear Soup Guy: Ah, right right
also brb for a few minutes
Apheori (GM): So Greibel did recognise the god! Excellent. This makes things even weirder.
Ganelon: I never said he recognized it.
But I did.
Rhu: You were downstairs. And apparently he did. I'm just going to go with it.
Oops.
Apheori (GM): THAT WAS ME.
But yeah, you'd recognise it too probably.
And you'd probably even realise what it is and talk coherently!
Instead of calling her 'Locksmith' and mumbling about nebulae.
Also GAN!
Can you fix Rhu's character sheet for me by any chance? The formatting is awful.
Apheori (GM): If not it's fine, but if so it'd be much appreciated.
Frezak (GM): Can I have Asri's HP and surge count?
Apheori (GM): 27, 6
Wait, not 6.
11
There's a damn plant between me and the screen.
Wen: o_O
Frezak (GM): Hokay.
So.
Do we carry on and wait for Azri to make an entrance?
Apheori (GM): Yar! Is everyone here now?
Ganelon: Still here.
Can't see Rhu's name/bar.
Wen: the picture of the other potential picture is still on screen
oh gone
Frezak (GM): Did I check the corpses for how long they'd been aging?
Apheori (GM): Yes. You had said they'd been dead inconsistent amounts of time.
Frezak (GM): right.
Apheori (GM): You also found a lot of variation in attire, but that may or may not have meant anything on a world like Sarathi.
Frezak (GM): So we know the building is suffering from some kind of intermittent phasing.
I'm gonna ASSUME the fish was 'ported here.
Apheori (GM): Perhaps.
Bear Soup Guy: Okay I came back now
Frezak (GM): Can Radek trace that back, somhow?
using magic?
MAGIC.
Apheori (GM): Quite possibly.
Frezak (GM): RADEK.
DO HOLE MAGIC.
Apheori (GM): Bear Soup Guy: Remember: You're still pretty out of it.
Ganelon: Very well.
Apheori (GM): And there's a locksmith or something talking at you.
Bear Soup Guy: Right!
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+10
(
4
)
+10
=
14
Frezak (GM): BSG.
YOU ARE ON DRUGS.
TALKING TO A CAT.
Bear Soup Guy: I'm I still in a different room from everyone else?
Ganelon: No magic here!
Frezak (GM): That's not great, Gan.
Apheori (GM): Obviously he's on drugs... lessee.
Ganelon: Yeah, yeah.
Apheori (GM): Radek doesn't find anything hole-related.
With his... er... hole magic.
Frezak (GM): HoleTech.
Ganelon: I can't be a perfect hole magician every day of the week.
Frezak (GM): Holercana
Apheori (GM): And guys, when are you in character?
Frezak (GM): When can ask Radek to do something that my character might know about?
Because Gravy don't know shit about science or magic.
His expertise is very restricted.
The Gravedigger: Well.
These guys are dead.
Trust me on this, guys.
Dead people, right here.
Lokshmi: (to Greibel) Locksmith?
Dead people sit there.
Greibel: Oh right, so what do you do Locksmith?
Lokshmi: Why did I even bother?
Lokshmi vanishes.
Greibel looks around innocently
Apheori (GM): Well, the cat's gone.
Bear Soup Guy: It was a lovely cat
Frezak (GM): I'll check the corpses for shinies.
Or anything.
Pockets.
Rhu says something agreeing with the assessment of deadity, and how he isn't sure what actually killed them.
Frezak (GM): Possibly by picking them up and shaking them upside-down until things fall out.
Greibel stumbles back into the dead room and falls over
Apheori (GM): You pick up a nearby corpse and it falls apart all over your feet.
Frezak (GM): huh.
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Frezak (GM): I'll try the next one.
Clearly the preservation techniques were sub-par.
I don't approve of this sloppiness.
I'm assuming Radek is just sat there grumping.
Ganelon: Basically.
Apheori (GM): The next one drops some stuff - a fork, some discs, and a wad of lint.
Ganelon: Discs?
Frezak (GM): Discs?
As science discs?
Or big coins?
Apheori (GM): Data transfer/storage or whatever.
Frezak (GM): I shove them at Radek.
Apheori (GM): Probably for id stuff and entertainment, but you never know.
The Gravedigger: A CLUE!
Frezak (GM): Clearly Greibel is not the person to consult on this.
No offense, Mr Stoner Sir.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: Dude, get up.
Bear Soup Guy: None taken horse man
Apheori (GM): This is your MIIIIIND speaking.
Or something.
Apheori (GM) rattles GReibel
Apheori (GM): s brain.
Bear Soup Guy: Oh right!
Greibel: Guys, I saw a talking locksmith!
And a room that isn't there anymore!
The Gravedigger: How do you know it was a locksmith?
Did he have lockpicks?
Radek looks over the disks skeptically.
Ganelon: Are they unlabeled?
Frezak (GM): It's a porn collection.
Greibel: It told me it was a locksmith
It was a TALKING locksmith after all
The Gravedigger: Most lockmiths do.
Apheori (GM): The disks are fairly ordinary - a bunch of id, flicks, etc, but one has no label at all.
Probably a personal storage one?
You're not sure.
Greibel: I'm sure the locksmith told me something important
About keys or something
I just can't remember what it was
The Gravedigger shrugs.
The Gravedigger: Check your pockets for keys?
(To Greibel): And a sandcastle. Mention the sandcastle.
Wen: brb in 5-10ish
The Gravedigger: Or STOP TAKING DRUGS.
(To Greibel): You feel like there was a lot more to it, though.
Greibel: Yes! There was something about a sand castle!
Greibel also checks his pockets
Frezak (GM): ONe of your pockets is now a mimic.
Rhu asks if there was anything odd about the locksmith, if it looked familiar...
Greibel: Well that's an unfortunate state of affairs
Apheori (GM): It's not a mimic.
Shut up.
Greibel: :)
The locksmith, it looked like....a cat!
The Gravedigger: Cats can't be locksmiths.
They have paws.
Can't hold tools.
Greibel: Yes, but what if you were a locksmith that simply looked like a cat?
Rhu: Lokshmi?
Frezak (GM): Would I know that name?
Greibel: Right!
It told me its name was Lokshmi
Apheori (GM): Probably.
Though you may not know a whole lot about her.
Frezak (GM): Enough to know that she should be a god?
Apheori (GM): Yes.
The Gravedigger: So you met a cat that told you it was a god?
Greibel: A god of keys!
The Gravedigger: Well, that would be the first living thing on this planet that's not us.
Where is it?
Radek: In his head, I'm sure.
Greibel: She seemed dissatisfied with me, and then left
The Gravedigger: Probably because you're on drugs.
Rhu: Three tails? Broken horn? Spots?
(To Greibel): She looked like that.
Apheori (GM): Probably.
Wen: back
(To Wen): Time to introduce you soon, methinks.
Greibel: Yeah, that's what she was like
(From Wen): sure, take your time
Apheori (GM): Radek: You may or may not know a fair bit about her. Whether or not you believe the stoner, however, is another matter.
Greibel: And she told me something very important about a sandcastle, and then dragged me out of the room that wasn't there
The Gravedigger: WHAT did she say about a sandcastle?
Greibel: She showed me one, in some sort of vision
The Gravedigger: Really now.
Rhu explains that Lokshmi is the god of memory, fury, and revenge. And something about this possibly being a very bad sign.
Rhu: Assuming it was real.
Ganelon: Wait, I do?
The Gravedigger: IF gods ARE talking to us, then it would be a bad thing.
Especially if they're talking to Greibel.
Rhu: But the bodies were...
Ganelon: Radek couldn't care less about the gods.
Apheori (GM): Radek knows things, though.
The Gravedigger: No offense, Greibel.
Apheori (GM): Even if he doesn't care about the gods, they sometimes come up in things.
Greibel: None taken, horse dude
The Gravedigger: Horse? WHat?
Greibel: Hey, I didn't give you those hooves
Greibel stares off lazily
Ganelon: Does he actually have hooves?
Frezak (GM): I don't think so.
Rhu: Probably.
Frezak (GM): RP-wise, I'm Unica.
Rhu: Oops.
Bear Soup Guy: Isn't he a minotaur thing?
Frezak (GM): I thought I had feet.
Apheori (GM): Well, They can have hooves.
This one doesn't, then.
Radek: It's amazing how you people still take anything he says seriously.
Get over here. I have disks.
The Gravedigger: SCIENCE
Ganelon: They make passable coasters.
Apheori (GM): You can stick the disks in your computery thingy.
And bring up...
CAT PICTURES.
Ganelon: Humorously captioned, cute, or both?
Apheori (GM): They're all pictures of Lokshmi
.
Frezak (GM): Hellfire.
Radek: ...Well.
Ganelon: Just a whole bunch of pictures of a cat-god
This is the unmarked disk, then?
Apheori (GM): Yes.
You can try the others.
They're all normal random things that don't tell you anything.
Radek: I conclude that the people who died in this room possessed an aversion to recording useful information.
Particularly regarding their deaths. Very inconsiderate of them.
Greibel: But who can really blame them?
Look at the kitty!
Apheori (GM): The computer stops working.
Greibel: Roll a d20.
Frezak (GM): Well, this isn't getting us anywhere.
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
4
)
=
4
Frezak (GM): Maybe time to go out and poke around elsewhere?
Ganelon: Wait, mine does?
Apheori (GM): Gan: Yes.
It just shuts down.
Ganelon: It's not out of power, I'd hope.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You see Lokshmi coming down the stairs.
Greibel: Woah hey, it's the locksmith guys!
Greibel points
Apheori (GM): There's a man following her cautiously.
(To Wen): He's hallucinating.
Ganelon: I'll look just in case anything at all is there.
(To Wen): You're not actually there yet.
Frezak (GM): Do we see the man and/or cat?
Apheori (GM): Nope.
(From Aziraphale): noted
The Gravedigger: Really, Greibel.
Less drugs.
Apheori (GM): Gan: Where do you look?
Greibel shirks it off and goes over the the foot of the stairs
Ganelon: Where he pointed, of course.
Apheori (GM): Oh.
You notice a shimmering again above some of the stairs, but don't see any gods or other folk.
Radek: ...Bloody illusions.
The Gravedigger: More fish?
Ganelon: Then I'm going to try and fix this computer.
Apheori (GM): Roll a thingy.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+10
(
17
)
+10
=
27
Assuming this is also a trained, int-based skill.
Apheori (GM): You get the computer to turn on again and boot, but it won't connect to the main servers.
So it's kind of not very useful.
Ganelon: Well, there's nothing I can do about connection failure unless the adapter on this thing itself is broken.
Frezak (GM): This is a modern city, yes?
Ganelon: So I'll leave it at that.
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Very.
Frezak (GM): Nay chance there's a.... security camera network?
That we could tap into with scienec?
*science?
Apheori (GM): There probably is. You could probably tap into it even without science from the... er... security office core thingy.
But without that there are also terminals in a lot of the offices.
Frezak (GM): Offices in this building?
Apheori (GM): Yes.
These are like shops and things.
Frezak (GM): Would shops have access to the city security network?
Apheori (GM): Some, yes, but not enough to be useful unless you can hack them.
Frezak (GM): Sounds like a job for the scienceman.
Apheori (GM): Griebel: You see that cat again, with that same guy following her down the stairs.
(To Wen): This time it's real.
Greibel: Right@
(To Wen): Though they might not think it...
(From Aziraphale): do other people see me this time? the cat?
The Gravedigger: Hey, Radek. You think you could get into the cameras and see what happened to this place?
(To Wen): Yes.
Greibel tries to talk to the cat and guy without interrupting the conversation about computers
(To Wen): If they look.
(To Greibel): They're real. Actually talk to them.
(To Greibel): Like with words.
Greibel: Hi Lokshmi!
(To Greibel): Because it's Wen.
Greibel: Hi other guy!
Lokshmi: Oh, so you do know my name.
I am shocked.
Greibel: I figured it out again after I wasn't so stoned and stuff.
Radek: Not from here, I couldn't.
(From Aziraphale): would be fun if they keep ignoring him and end up wandering off elsewhere :D
Greibel: Who's your non-cat friend?
The Gravedigger: From where, then?
(To Aziraphale): Aye. Talk to him, though. Greibel.
The Gravedigger: Because it's either cameras or hallucinations.
Radek: Find me a terminal, or better yet, the security room.
(To Aziraphale): First person you've seen! Who seems... mostly sane.
Aziraphale: hi... person with face who looks like it was hit with a football
Frezak (GM): I'm gonna start looking for such a room.
Greibel: That's very perceptive of you
Aziraphale: Yes, yes it is.
Aziraphale looks around suspiciously
Lokshmi: Frezak: Try using a map. It's probably on it.
Apheori (GM): Er, sorry, that wasn't lokshmi.
Frezak (GM): What map?
I thought I had an out-dated city map.
(From Aziraphale): oh crap, that reminds me. I don't have an inventory. Any important thingies I should know I have?
Frezak (GM): That would not tell me whether there was a security room in this building.
Lokshmi: He is real, paladin of the lawful god.
(To Aziraphale): Eh, you have a bunch of stuff. Make it up if you want. Just things you had in your pockets, picked up, etc.
Greibel: Why did you bring him here?
Apheori (GM): Frezak: It'd be labelled.
It's important.
Frezak (GM): Well how far is the nearest security building?
Lokshmi: Greibel: Your collective survival depends up on it.
And I was bored.
Ganelon: Are the rest of us just hearing a one-sided conversation take place here?
Aziraphale: You're ignoring it.
Greibel: Oh, cool man. I get bored like that sometimes too.
Dead people: afgsfh
Apheori (GM): DAMMIT.
You're ignoring it or something.
Because if you'd just LOOK, it's really happening.
Ganelon: But I did look.
And nothing was there.
Apheori (GM): Nothing WAS there then.
Now there is.
Bear Soup Guy: "Look with your third eye, man."
Aziraphale: (to Greibel) so, who are you? Who are these other people? Where is everyone?
Apheori (GM): Frezak: Each building has its own core; the ones for multiple buildings are more spread out.
Aziraphale 's fingers twitches on his weapon
Apheori (GM): But it looks like the one here is a couple floors down.
Frezak (GM): if a guy suddenly appeared in my vision, I'd like to be told of it. >.>
Down?
I thought we were on the ground floor?
Apheori (GM): Frezak: You and Radek were looking at a map or something.
Greibel: Everyone's mostly dead, man. Oh but we didn't kill 'em. Naw we got hired to check the place out. We came here in a space ship and everything.
Apheori (GM): Rhu noticed but thought it funny not to say anything.
No, this was just the entrance floor.
I mean, it's like A ground, but...
Aaaanyway you notice Greibel is talking to a real person and a real cat.
Aziraphale: (to Greibel) Space ship? Did you meet anyone alive on your way here?
Lokshmi: The living do not stay living.
Greibel: Well that would be pretty silly man, think of it.
Meeting alive people in the vacuum of space? Pssshh
Aziraphale: Fair point
The Gravedigger: Oh, no.
Am I on drugs too?
Radek, are you on drugs too?
Radek: No, I see them too.
Aziraphale 's fingers relax on account of the fact that this guy is probably drugged out of his mind and thus pretty safe
Lokshmi walks over toward the others.
The Gravedigger: I DID NOT SMOKE ANYTHING.
Aziraphale eyes the people looking at him suspiciously and grips his weapon
Lokshmi: You are not hallucinating.
The Gravedigger: Prove it.
Lokshmi: How?
The Gravedigger: Tah'ts just what a hallucination would say.
I don't know.
Aziraphale goes over to The Gravedigger and punches him in the arm
Aziraphale: I'm as real as you are.
Greibel: Oh I know!
The Gravedigger: I dig holes.
I don't deal with philosophy or whatever.
Hey!
Greibel: If you're real sing La Cucaracha!
The Gravedigger: Don't punch me!
Apheori (GM): Gravy: A certainty settles in your mind that this is indeed real, that this is the god Lokshmi before you, and that tuna is utterly amazing.
Radek: I'm supposed to believe that I'm talking to a god, is that it?
Frezak (GM): i'd like to point that i'm a seven foot slab of flesh.
(From Aziraphale): what _are_ my weapons? I assume longswords don't really work in this setting.
Lokshmi: Radek J. Fulvius, what you believe is and isn't real is your own concern.
Apheori (GM): Frezak: Yes. She's a god and she can mess with minds, though.
The Gravedigger: hey, Radek. A god knows your name.
Radek: Marvelous.
(To Wen): Longsword, rifle, couple knives.
(To Wen): Swords are popular.
(From Aziraphale): okay
Radek: No doubt it wants something from me, too.
Lokshmi: No doubt.
The Gravedigger: What, like it wants you to debug a hard drive?
Frezak (GM): that was Gravy's entire technical lingo.
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Aziraphale walks around the room looking at the walls
Lokshmi: Your technical knowledge is impressive, Gravedigger.
Apheori (GM): They look like walls. Some of the signs are askew on the shops. You realise this is a shopping center sort of thingy.
Radek scoffs.
The Gravedigger: Thanks!
Lokshmi: In all seriousness, AZIRAPHALE GET BACK HERE.
The Gravedigger: So who's he, then?
Lokshmi: I have words.
Aziraphale turns around and goes back to the group
The Gravedigger: is it a story?
I like stories.
(To Wen): You might want to introduce yourself.
Greibel: Oh boy, me too!
Aziraphale: So, who are you people? Flat-face there told me you came from a space ship.
Rhu suspiciously asks what sorts of words.
The Gravedigger: Yeah.
It made sanwiches.
Radek: Does that mean you're a local?
Greibel: Oh yeah, it did
Aziraphale: Yes... yes. I am a local, at least more local than you seem to be.
Rhu: We came on behalf of a consortium of worlds interested in investigating what happened here.
What happened here?
Lokshmi: Fine. I can wait. I can spend all day waiting. It's not like I have anything better to do than wait.
Aziraphale: I do not know. I thought you might.
Lokshmi sits down and waits.
Greibel: Hey guys, maybe the cat chick knows something
Aziraphale: I was... doing something somewhere, and when I exited the place where I was doing something, everyone was gone.
Radek: Do you /actually/ have something better to do, Lokshmi?
Lokshmi: ...no.
(From Aziraphale): am I supposed to act like I trust these people? Under the circumstances it seems much more normal for me to be suspicious and tell as little as possible, lest they're assholes.
Ganelon: The gods are never busy. It's why they get bored so easily.
Aziraphale: You said you came here to investigate. So what did you find?
(To Aziraphale): You may or may not trust them, but you've been desperate and alone and that will play into it.
Lokshmi: There are very few living remaining.
And those that are, are not who they were. Or what they were.
The Gravedigger: What are they then?
Fish?
Lokshmi: Time and space here are twisted. In a way it has separated from the rest of what you may know as reality.
Aziraphale: Lunatics or zombies, if the ones I saw are any judge.
Lokshmi: So I am waiting here, within the anomaly, because otherwise I may miss it entirely.
Aziraphale: And as you know, zombies are supposed to have been wiped out two millenia ago.
Lokshmi: Here, they were. But this is not the case... elsewhere.
This disaster spans many realities, and many different versions of the present.
Greibel: Oooohh, elsewhere in space and time, right?
The Gravedigger: Sounds very magical.
Lokshmi: ...yes.
Greibel: Man, this cat chick is blowing my mind
Lokshmi: Would that it were, but I am afraid magic has nothing to do with it. Even the eyes of the gods are blinded.
This is not your story, however.
The real story is yet to come, at least for us. For you, the story lies elsewhere.
Fact of the matter is you will probably never go home at all. But should you try, you will need to remember this: It is Ajirahd and Irundha of Akrikdirin Vak who reign king of the sandcastle. You must remember this. You must return to this.
Radek: You couldn't have told us this before we left?
The Gravedigger: Um.
Miss cat god thing?
Can you say that less gibberishly?
Lokshmi: Radek...
You who would have nothing of the gods would now ask in retrospect?
But no, you could not be told. Those outside do not know.
Gravedigger, the riddle is the riddle that is used universally. You will need to figure it out for yourselves.
Radek: I only wish that the gods would return my sentiment.
The Gravedigger: Well that's not very helpful.
Lokshmi: Considering the general level of incompetence amongst most of them, I can't say I quite disagree.
And no, it isn't helpful.
But it's as helpful as I can be.
You should be glad I have nothing better to do than try.
The Gravedigger: I should?
Aziraphale: Probably. Gods are right buggers, the lot of them.
Aziraphale mutters to himself
(To Wen): Careful. You love yours, at least.
Apheori (GM): Radek: Roll a d20
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
3
)
=
3
Marvelous.
Apheori (GM): You feel this strange buzzing in your ears.
Ganelon: Of a... deafening variety?
Rhu: Why are you here?
Apheori (GM): No, slight, just enough to be annoying.
Lokshmi: It's beginning and nobody would listen.
Not even the Kings.
They, who are sworn to protect all against... this.
Good luck, Wayfarers.
Lokshmi vanishes.
Apheori (GM): SO.
WHAT NOW?
The Gravedigger: Huh.
Well, mr... whoever you are.
We're gonna go look for the security center.
Since we have a job to do.
Aziraphale: I'll come with you.
Name's Aziraphale. Somewhat pleased to meet you on account of the fact that you're the first people alive and possibly sane I've seen in days.
The Gravedigger: Awesome.
You didn't see any of the other .. exploration parties that came here?
Aziraphale: No-o. I got attacked by a horde of zombies and a bunch of lunatics, but unless those were the exploration parties you mentioned, no.
Apheori (GM): So you're all headed down to the security center as you talk.
Radek's buzzing is getting worse.
Ganelon: This would likely lead to him being more visibly distressed by it.
He wouldn't say anything, though.
Frezak (GM): I'm probably used to him frowning all the time.
Wen: oh, and I saw some crazy stuff, but I'm not mentioning it because it'd make me look insane.
Frezak (GM): And being grumpy.
Consider that you're next to Greibel.
Wen: Well if someone mentions it I might bring it up. But looking like a lunatic to a party of jumpy investigators doesn't look like a good idea to this guy.
Frezak (GM): Jumpy?
We're all cooool.
And miffed.
Wen: Greibel, maybe.
Aziraphale looks around suspiciously as he walks
Apheori (GM): Azira: A wall calls out as you pass, "C'mon, you know you want it."
Aziraphale jumps and walks more quickly
Aziraphale casts furtive glances at where the noise came from
Aziraphale: Do the others seem like they noticed it?
Apheori (GM): No.
Greibel, Radek: Roll a d20.
Radek:
rolling 1d20
(
2
)
=
2
Ganelon: My spiral into madness continues, no doubt.
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
20
)
=
20
Apheori (GM): Greibel: Everything seems miraculously clear. You feel like you understand the cosmos perfectly.
Radek: You walk into a door.
Greibel glows
Apheori (GM): This is notable because the door wasn't there a moment ago.
Radek grumbles loudly.
Apheori (GM): It's just an ordinary-looking door standing up in the middle of the corridor.
Wen: do we see it / notice that the door appeared out of nowhere?
Frezak (GM): Against a wall, or just free-floating?
Apheori (GM): Free-floating. The only other person who sees it is Greibel. But right now, he's seeing a whole LOT of things.
Ganelon: I'll stand up and open the door.
Apheori (GM): And I don't think he's paying much attention.
Frezak (GM): Do I smell illusions?
Apheori (GM): The door opens into a strange view of darkness.
Pinpoints of light are scattered throughout it, and within, you sense a presence.
Frezak: You smell burning.
Roll to smell more.
Aziraphale: Radek, what are you doing?
Greibel: Hey Radek, bet you wanna know what that strange view of darkness with the pinpoints and the presence is
Radek: Not as much as I'd like to stop hallucinating and find what we came here for.
(To Greibel): It's another plane of existence, not a hallucination.
(From Wen): do I know their names? >>>
(From Wen): >.>
Greibel: That's no hallucination
(To Greibel): The presence is the spirit of the universe.
Greibel: That's a whole other plane of existence
And the presence
(To Wen): You should ask.
Greibel: That, my friend, is the spirit of the universe
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+8
(
2
)
+8
=
10
Greibel puts his arm around Radek's shoulder
Apheori (GM): You smell fish.
Frezak (GM): Graaaah
Wen eyes Greibel and Radek
Radek: Get your hands off of me.
The Gravedigger: I smell fish.
Also burning.
Greibel does so
The Gravedigger: And don't touch the grump, Greibel.
he's grumpy.
Apheori (GM): The smell of fish goes away.
Greibel: So I see
I also see the smells you smell
Aziraphale: Um, why are we stopping?
(To Greibel): The fish are in the sea. There's water and stuff. And the burning is because the entire building was incinerated.
Ganelon: I'll close the door.
The Gravedigger: radek bumped into something.
Radek: We aren't. Let's keep moving.
The Gravedigger: One of these things that aren't here.
ONWARDS
Greibel: The fish you smell are in the ocean
(To Greibel): You see other things, too - death, life, strange characters that aren't real... more bodies, a sea of colourful playroom balls...
Greibel: The burning is because this whole building incinerated
Frezak (GM): I'll lead the march, shovel and shield at the ready.
Apheori (GM): The door disappears as it is shut.
Aziraphale: It would be a lot more convenient if I knew your names. So guy who bumped into something is Radek. The rest of you?
The Gravedigger: I'm The Gravedigger.
You can call me Gravy.
Greibel: I see death and life and strange characters that aren't real....and a sea of colourful playroom balls...
Aziraphale: Hi Gravy. Hello crazy person.
The Gravedigger: That's Greibel.
He's on drugs.
Greibel: I, friend Aziraphale, am Greibel
Greibel bows
Aziraphale: Quite obviously.
Rhu: I'm Rhu. I'm not on drugs.
Aziraphale: Good to hear.
Rhu: I thought so too!
Apheori (GM): Azira: Roll a d20.
Aziraphale:
rolling 1d20
(
6
)
=
6
Apheori (GM): Okay.
So you all make it to the room, or what should be according to the map, but the door is locked.
Or maybe the mechanism isn't responding.
It won't open, at any rate.
The Gravedigger: IT'S HOLE TIME.
Frezak (GM): I want to charge it with my shield.
Apheori (GM): Azira: The door wiggles at you suggestively.
Aziraphale looks at the door and then the other people
Apheori (GM): You can totally charge it with your shield.
Aziraphale: Er, guys, did you see that?
Apheori (GM): Guys: You don't know what he's talking about.
Frezak (GM): Strength check with shield bonus?
Radek: Yes, I quite clearly saw this door, thank you.
The Gravedigger: Step back, guys.
Apheori (GM): Go for it.
Aziraphale mutters to himself but otherwise does nothing
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+5
(
13
)
+5
=
18
Apheori (GM): The door bends slightly.
Frezak (GM): And again!
Apheori (GM): You made a dent.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+5
(
20
)
+5
=
25
HOOOOOOOOLE
Apheori (GM): The dent is much bigger, and there's a gap by the edge of the frame where the door was bent away.
You can either pry it open or hit it again, but you might break something if you do the latter.
...such as yourself.
Frezak (GM): Anyone have a prying device?
Crowbar or sword?
Greibel: I have a staff
Rhu: What about a shovel?
Aziraphale: I have a sword.
Greibel: That's kind of like a wooden crowbar
Rhu: Don't you have a shovel?
Frezak (GM): SHovel has a wooden handle.
It's a shovel.
Radek: You're not touching my rifle.
Frezak (GM): Against a metal door?
Nuh-uh.
Aziraphale: Should I try to pry it open with my sword?
Frezak (GM): What's your Str?
Aziraphale: 18 +4 mod
Ganelon: I'm fairly sure it's 18.
Frezak (GM): Sure, go ahead.
Ganelon: He's a paladin, and not the likable sort either.
Frezak (GM): Unless anyone has a power that would work.
Wen: so what do I roll?
Rhu: Azira: The door wiggles at you again as you approahc.
Dammit, sorry.
Frezak (GM): You're as bad as the hag, Names.
Apheori (GM): THE DOOR WIGGLES.
Frezak (GM): Wiggly-wiggly.
Apheori (GM): Sorry.
Aziraphale approaches the door but hesitates
Greibel: I could turn into a something and fit through the gap and open it from the other end
Aziraphale: Um, guys, is it just me or is the door making indecent motions?
The Gravedigger: I tihnk it's you.
Are you on drugs?
Apheori (GM): Eh, roll with your strength mod, if you even want to get close to it.
Aziraphale rubs his eyes
Wen: is it continuing to wiggle?
Greibel: Do I see clearly what other people see for weird things still?
Rhu: Have you slept?
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You look and see it wiggling too.
It's stopping, though.
Greibel: Hey Azi, that door's totally wiggling
Aw, but not anymore
Apheori (GM): Okay, so do you pry it open?
Aziraphale: Um, are we sure we want to pry this open?
The Gravedigger: Yes?
Aziraphale: allright, here goes
Aziraphale approaches very cautiously
Aziraphale:
rolling 1d20 + 4
(
3
)
+4
=
7
Apheori (GM): The door comes open, but your sword gets ruined in the process, bent out of shape.
Wen: is there a way to talk OOC without using the mouse? something like /ooc message?
Apheori (GM): No idea.
Ganelon: Yes, but I'd have to find it.
I'll go looking.
Wen: never mind for now
The Gravedigger: Aw, crap, man.
Aziraphale: Do we go in?
The Gravedigger: Your sword.
Aziraphale: ...and can someone fix my sword?
The Gravedigger: Here, take this spade.
Aziraphale: I'm kind of attached to it.
Aziraphale sniffles but accepts the spade
Radek: Is it magical?
Wen: is it?
Ganelon: Very likely not.
Apheori (GM): Probably not any more than the basic enchantments to keep it solid.
Which apparently... failed.
Swords are not supposed to do that.
Frezak (GM): Spade is a battleaxe, btw. Military versatile Axe, 1D10, prof 2.
Radek: Give it here. I might be able to do something.
Ganelon: Not quickly, mind you.
Aziraphale hands Radek the sword
Aziraphale: So do we go in?
Frezak (GM): I'll head in first as the meatshield.
Check things look safe first.
Wen: oh, it _is_ just doing ooc
so /ooc whatever works
Apheori (GM): You head in. There's a dead guy in a wheely chair, apparently shot in the head.
Two other chairs are empty.
Frezak (GM): From behind or in front?
The shot.
Apheori (GM): Mostly it's just an ordinary room with some monitors and consoles and a suspiciously large number of boxes of stale doughnuts in the corner.
Front.
Frezak (GM): Expiry date on the donuts?
Just to tell how long they've been there.
Apheori (GM): None is listed.
There's also a shiny thing on the floor.
Frezak (GM): SHINY.
Wen: EX shiny object
Aziraphale: Gravy: Is it safe for us to go in?
The Gravedigger: Just one dead guy.
Apheori (GM): It's a little butterfly pendant, a brilliant shade of blue.
Frezak (GM): I'll give the dead guy a poke in case it moves.
I will take the shiny thing.
If I can before anyone else sees it.
Apheori (GM): The dead guy slides partially out of his chair.
Considering your size, methinks you can.
So you have a shiny little blue butterfly pendant.
Frezak (GM): Awesome.
Ganelon: Loot!
Frezak (GM): I'll put in a pouch for now.
I intend to show it to Radek later.
Wen: so I guess the rest of us just join him in the room?
Frezak (GM): Right now I'll shuffle into a corner and let you guys do things.
Apheori (GM): Right. So you all pile in.
You're by the doughnuts. They smell like doughnuts.
It's kind of overpowering, in fact.
There are clearly a lot of doughnuts.
Aziraphale: Anybody want a doughnut?
Apheori (GM): Frazak: Roll a d20.
The Gravedigger: They look stale.
Radek: I don't eat anymore.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20
(
2
)
=
2
All these rolls are messing with my luck quotas.
Apheori (GM): The doughnut smell disappears and you suddenly realise most of the boxes are empty.
Greibel absentmindedly tries to bite what used to be a doughnut and now is air
Apheori (GM): Don't worry. Low rolls can actually have GOOD effects with these.
Aziraphale: ...Another illusion, eh?
Apheori (GM): Radek, Azi: You notice Greibel getting confused trying to eat a doughnut.
(You noticed nothing about it disappearing.)
Radek: Though I would advise you against believing everything Greibel says, he may be right about this. These aren't illusions.
This whole building is experiencing some sort of dimensional instability.
Frezak (GM): I know!
We did hole science!
The Gravedigger: I know!
We did hole science!
Greibel: It took ghost donuts to convince you
Aziraphale: Greibel, the doughnut is stale. Best not eat it.
Greibel: Right...
Greibel tosses out the donut he no longer sees
Apheori (GM): One of the monitors flickers on.
Radek: Roll a d20.
Radek:
rolling 1d20
(
1
)
=
1
Frezak (GM): You see a young girl, with long dark hair in front of her face.
She is wet.
Ganelon: I was actually wondering if I'd go from 3, to 2, and then to 1.
Apparently it was destined.
Apheori (GM): Radek: Everything explodes in horrible sound and you fall to the ground.
Wen: /me shakes fists at the RNG
Ganelon: Lovely!
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You hear the sound too, but not as badly: a buzzing roar, and feel like there is something else to it. A presense, a person...?
Aziraphale: do we notice that Radek fell to the ground?
Apheori (GM): It should be just outside, through that... er... wall.
Probably.
The Gravedigger: Radek?
Aziraphale goes over to Radek and examines him
Greibel: Hmmm
The Gravedigger pokes the Artificer.
Wen: does he look alive?
Ganelon: Does he ever?
Greibel rubs the wall
Apheori (GM): He looks miserable.
Greibel: Something's eating his brain or something
Apheori (GM): Radek: Roll again.
Greibel: Hey horsey dude, can you bust this wall?
Radek:
rolling 1d20
(
4
)
=
4
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You roll too.
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
20
)
=
20
\m/
Apheori (GM): Radek: The buzzing fades slightly, but you still can't do a whole lot.
Ganelon: These rolls are frighteningly consistent.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You walk through the wall.
Greibel: XD
Hey horsey dude! Never mind!
Apheori (GM): Radek: You see him do it.
Ganelon: I don't think I'm really in a state to do much about that.
Apheori (GM): Nope.
Azira may have seen it too.
Rhu and Gravy weren't looking that way, though.
Aziraphale: Hey guys, where did Greibel go?
He was near that wall... and then he was just gone.
The Gravedigger: This is all getting a bit silly.
Aziraphale: A bit?
A BIT?
The Gravedigger: Well, it was weird before.
Now it's just silly.
Greibel does a silly walk on the other side of the wall
Aziraphale: I had a wall chatting me up, a door making indecent motions at me and then the room explodes and a doped up guy walked through a wall. Oh, and I saw a potted plant eat someone's face, and a room full of fanged hams, and floors that weren't real.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You follow the sense into another room, on another floor. Before you, you see a girl, maybe human, maybe not. She looks lost, confused, and does not seem to see you.
Aziraphale babbles incoherently
The Gravedigger: You're on drugs.
You should sit down for a bit.
Wen: this is me breaking down and telling everything
that was in the backstory given to me
Rhu mentions having seen some rather odd things as well.
Apheori (GM): Wen: Don't announce that to everyone! Add to the mystery!
Greibel goes up to the girl cautiouslu
Wen: sorry >.>
Greibel: cautiously too
Apheori (GM): NAw, it's fine.
Frezak (GM): I'll pick Radek up and put him in one of the chairs.
Lying around isn't gonna help.
Aziraphale takes a few deep breaths
Aziraphale: Okay, so what do we do now?
Apheori (GM): Greibel: She looks up and sees you. She's not human. In fact, you're not sure what she is - her eyes are a brilliant blue, glowing, even, and her face is alien like the models of the cenva you had seen as a child...
The Gravedigger: Well, I was hoping Radek would be able to poke at the city cameras.
Aziraphale: I suggest we get Radek somewhere marginally safe and try to find Greibel.
The Gravedigger: I have no idea what is safe.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: "I'm sorry," you hear her whisper.
Aziraphale: Well, can we improvise a stretcher?
The Gravedigger pokes the wall Greibel walked through.
Apheori (GM): Radek: You hear her too, but to you the voice is deafening.
The wall is solid.
The Gravedigger: I don't think it was anything physical.
It's probably just madness.
Greibel: What do you mean you're sorry? Are you lost?
Apheori (GM): Gravy, Radek: Roll a d20.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
18
)
=
18
The Gravedigger:
rolling 1D20
(
20
)
=
20
Ganelon: YES
LET IT END
Radek: Radek: You get better, and stuff. Yeah.
Frezak (GM): Double crits, bitches.
Apheori (GM): Er.
Ganelon: Thank you, self.
Wen: XD
Apheori (GM): XD
Greibel: Roll d20.
Radek: Did one of you say something?
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
3
)
=
3
The Gravedigger: Before or after you fell over?
Radek: After.
Things became rather deafening.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: The girl suddenly gets very large, and changes, a form of immense light, gleaming in blackness. She screams, whatever she is, and dissappears.
The Gravedigger: Greibel walked through a wall.
Hmm.
Greibel: Well, that was fun.
The Gravedigger: HEY, GREIBEL.
GET BACK HERE
Bear Soup Guy: Did she leave anything behind?
Frezak (GM): 18 con lungs, again.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: There's a pile of goop on the floor. You also realise you have no idea how to get back.
Frezak: You have a radio, you know.
Frezak (GM): I also have 18 con lungs.
Apheori (GM): ...yes.
Frezak (GM): RAdios are technology.
Apheori (GM): But there's a bunch of walls in the way.
Frezak (GM): Lungs are closer at hand.
Apheori (GM): TECHNOLOGICAL walls.
Frezak (GM): Ahhh, but the walls might not exist for him.
Wen: snrk
Apheori (GM): Greibel, roll a d20.
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
17
)
=
17
Apheori (GM): He doesn't hear you.
Greibel: XD
Frezak (GM): I'll try the radio.
Apheori (GM): The radio spits out horrible buzzing.
The Gravedigger: Hey, stoner guy?
Greibel touches the goop cautiously
The Gravedigger: Aaaaah.
The Gravedigger turns off radio.
The Gravedigger: Well.
Bugger.
Apheori (GM): It looks like goop.
Greibel: It sticks to your hands and turns into a pair of really suspicious, weird gloves.
The Gravedigger: CAN you get anything off the cameras, RAdek?
Greibel: Woah, cool
Radek: Let's... have a look.
Apheori (GM): One of the screens is showing a boot screen, stuck on network connect.
Aziraphale: That was happening to me too
The computers that worked couldn't connect.
Couldn't call anyone either. Networks all down.
Ganelon: Connecting to the building's security network, or something larger in scale?
Apheori (GM): The main network. You could try to get it to only do a local connect to the rest ofthe building.
Ganelon: I would like to try that.
Aziraphale: They'd turn on, work for a bit, flicker, and then shut down.
Apheori (GM): Roll something appropriate and fiddle with it, smart person.
Radek:
rolling 1d20+10
(
12
)
+10
=
22
Greibel , meanwhile, is wandering looking at his hands
Apheori (GM): Radek: You get the computer up with connectivity to the rest of the building.
Greibel: Roll a d20.
Radek: There. Let's see if the cameras are still operational.
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
19
)
=
19
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You see absolutely nothing unusual.
Radek: You find the cameras without trouble, with both live feeds on some, and logs available as well.
Ganelon: His "gloves" are gone?
Apheori (GM): He can't SEE them.
Wen: Radek: Do a /etc/init.d/network restart
/me runs
Apheori (GM) hits Wen with a frying pan.
Ganelon: In the interest of getting out of this building as soon as possible, I'd like to just download any recorded footage from these cameras and check it out somewhere less maddening.
Apheori (GM): You download what you can get.
Aziraphale: Radek: Anything useful?
Radek: Maybe. You'll excuse me for not wanting to sit around viewing it in here.
Apheori (GM): (It's a few months' worth of stuff.)
Aziraphale: So let's try to find Greibel and get the heck out of here.
Ganelon: Is he in view of any cameras?
Apheori (GM): You check the current feeds.
Looks like he's wandering down a corridor labelled 'pheasant'.
He's also walking through objects.
Radek points at the screen. "Done."
Apheori (GM): Some broken furniture, a few bodies, buckets of paint...
A... chicken?
The Gravedigger: A live chicken?
Ganelon: Oh no.
Frezak (GM): OOC
Ganelon: A rubber one.
Rhu: It looks dead, but it's moving.
Frezak (GM): Ew.
Rhu: Are chickens supposed to do that?
Wen: judging from the map, can we reach him?
...without going through walls
Apheori (GM): Greibel, Azi: Roll a d20.
Aziraphale:
rolling 1d20
(
19
)
=
19
Ganelon: Another question: is there a speaker system?
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
20
)
=
20
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You greet the swarm of undead chickens.
Gan: Probably. You should be able to access it from here.
Greibel: Ah, the chickens.
I knew this day would come.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: The chickens flock around you and rub against your legs in a friendly fashion.
Ganelon: One last question: can we hear him or is this communication strictly one-way?
Apheori (GM): Roll when figuring it out.
Greibel: Maybe you chickens can tell me how to get back to the room with the dead guy in it?
Ganelon: ...Wait, what?
Greibel: I do speak chicken, after all.
Apheori (GM): Gan: The system.
Ganelon: You want me to roll again, then?
Apheori (GM): Greibel: The chickens squack in confusion. Apparently in their dead state they forgot chicken themselves.
Gan: Right.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+10
(
4
)
+10
=
14
Greibel: Ah, to be expected
Greibel pets the chickens for a bit
Apheori (GM): Okay, you figure out how to use the intercom, and the remote speakers seem to respond as well.
Ganelon: Excellent
Radek: Hey, Greibel.
What the hell are you doing?
Apheori (GM): Greibel: Radek's voice echos around you, spooking the chickens.
They run away in every direction.
Greibel: =O
Thanks Grumpy! You spooked the chickens!
Radek: And you disappeared. Do you even know where you are?
Greibel: Well...no, can't say as I do.
Where are you?
Radek: Where you /left me/, along with everyone else.
The Gravedigger: HEY GREIBEL
Greibel: Hi Gravy!
Also, I went to go meet that girl who was making noises.
She blew up though.
Aziraphale: A girl?
Aziraphale wonders if it's his cousin
Greibel: Yeah, she looked sort of alien, with blue eyes
Super blue eyes
Radek: (To the others): I heard... something like that.
Aziraphale: Like what?
Radek: A girl.
Aziraphale: Hmm.
Greibel: She told me she was sorry, guys.
The Gravedigger: You people are all going insane.
Greibel: But like, then she kind of blew up, like I said
Rhu:
rolling 1d20
(
14
)
=
14
Radek: If you could just abandon the thought that this place exists in only one fixed state at a given point in time, this would make much more sense to you, Gravedigger.
The Gravedigger: Says the man who hears ghost girls and fall over because of mysterious sounds.
Apheori (GM): Gravy: Roll d20.
The Gravedigger:
rolling 1D20
(
4
)
=
4
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You too.
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
19
)
=
19
Radek: Allow me to pose you a riddle: what do you get when there is both a hole and not a hole occupying the same space?
The Gravedigger: You don't.
Holes are or they aren't.
Trust me.
I know holes.
Radek: Yet here we are.
Rhu: Holes in what?
Ganelon: I'd like to give Greibel some instructions to lead him back over here. Is that possible?
Apheori (GM): Yeah.
Let's just say you do it and he comes back.
The Gravedigger: If I was hearing ghost voices and you weren't you'd be calling me crazy.
Apheori (GM): But he has to roll a d20 on the way.
Ganelon: So many d20s.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: ROLL A d20.
Radek: Holes in reality.
Leading to other realities.
Aziraphale: Sounds like a book I read. Something about cutting through reality with a dagger.
Apheori (GM): Greibel. Roll.
Ganelon: ...Is anyone else familiar with this story he's talking about?
Apheori (GM): Might be. Probably would have read it as a child, so it depends on your backstory.
Wen: it's His Dark Materials >.> I'm just killing time while waiting for BSG
it's not meant to be part of canon
Apheori (GM): Shush. It can be a story here too.
Wen: sorry
Apheori (GM): Bah, screw it. *takes over Greibel*
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
17
)
=
17
Ganelon: Well, given the age difference, I'm guessing that unless it's a very classic story, Radek was no child when it was published.
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
3
)
=
3
Apheori (GM): Okay, Greibel makes it back to the rest of you based on Radek's direction, but he thinks he's a chicken and he wants to go back and rejoin the swarm now.
Radek: Do any of you want to use this terminal for something else?
Apheori (GM): Frezak vanished.
Aziraphale: I think we'd better leave this room, if not this building.
Ganelon: That happens a lot when birds roost on his... satellite dish?
Apheori (GM): >.<
Where's bear soup guy?
The Gravedigger: Yeah, let's get some fresh air.
Radek: Wait.
Apheori (GM): Should we wait to actually do that until his return?
Ganelon: It would be nice.
Wen: someone ping him on skype?
Ganelon: But first I want to break open this tech and scavenge the pieces.
Apheori (GM): You get... a bunch of pieces!
...I know nothing about the mechanics of your class or what pieces you want, so you can figure it out.
Ganelon: Just give me a "money" value worth of mechanical junk.
Like... let me give you a comparison to help.
Apheori (GM): I don't know what he money is. >.<
Ganelon: Okay.
A dagger is 1 GP, a longsword is 15, a suit of very heavy armor is 50.
Apheori (GM): You get a decent-value worth of stuff and a dead rodent you found in one of the cases.
Ganelon: Very basic magical stuff is 360.
Greibel: SORRY I'M BACK
Apheori (GM): It looks like a squirrel.
Ganelon: One clockwork bomb can be made from 40.
That's probably the most relevant number.
Apheori (GM): Call it about 200.
The Gravedigger: WoW.
Ganelon: Lovely. Thank you.
Apheori (GM): And a dead squirrel.
Frezak (GM): That's a lot of stuffs.
Ganelon: It's not useful for anything other than alchemy, though.
Apheori (GM): Greiebel: You're convinced you're an undead chicken and you want to rejoin your swarm, but you found your way back to the others.
Frezak: Computers are full of stuffs.
Ganelon: Unlike the RAW STUFF OF MAGIC which I will probably be stockpiling too.
Greibel pecks at Radek
Radek: Gah!
Frezak (GM): Gravy will just pick Greibel up.
Radek: Thank you.
Frezak (GM): And lift him above his head.
Greibel clucks madly
Apheori (GM): Azira: d20
Aziraphale:
rolling 1d20
(
13
)
=
13
Frezak (GM): I'll shake him vigourously until he calms down.
Apheori (GM): Azira: You suddenly get this feeling he's a chicken as well, but know it ain't right.
Frezak: It doesn't seem to help.
Aziraphale looks at Greibel in a puzzled manner
Aziraphale: ...Um, guys, I think we'd better just get out of here quickly.
There's some... influence here.
The Gravedigger: GREAT IDEA.
Aziraphale: If we have all the data and stuff we want, let's go.
Rhu: Best idea.
Wen: do we leave by the door?
Radek: Agreed.
Wen: do we have any trouble exiting through the bent and indecent door?
Greibel clucks in vague affirmation
Apheori (GM): Naw, the door poses no trouble.
Ganelon: I've half a mind to jump out the nearest ground-floor window at this point.
Rhu: What about the ship?
Will it even be there?
Aziraphale: Good idea to check, I think? It'd certainly be safer than any place I'd been during the past few days.
Apheori (GM): It's just that it was going crazy.
Rhu: It's just that it was going crazy.
Apheori (GM): Blarg.
The Gravedigger: Tell it it makes nice sandwiches.
Aziraphale: If it has communication devices you can also tell outsiders what you've found.
Greibel clucks at the word sandwiches
The Gravedigger: Radek has a thingy for that.
Rhu: We should report in, yeah.
Aziraphale: At any rate, I'd feel safer in something not affixed to this place. At the very least, outside of the building.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: Roll a d20.
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
11
)
=
11
Apheori (GM): Azir, Gravedigger: You too.
Aziraphale:
rolling 1d20
(
14
)
=
14
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20
(
7
)
=
7
Apheori (GM): Azi: You manage to shake the impression that Greibel is a chicken.
Aziraphale is relieved
Apheori (GM): Azira and the Gravedigger: You hear something strange. Like some sort of twisting and cracking.
The guy who thinks he's a chicken may hear it too, but it wouldn't mean anything to him.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20
(
2
)
=
2
Aziraphale: Did you guys hear that?
Rhu starts screaming.
Aziraphale: I think we really should leave this place as soon as possible.
The Gravedigger: Some thing, breaking?
Oh, Rhu? You too?
Aziraphale: Possibly. Certainly nothing good.
Let's grab the insane ones and go.
Rhu: Broken, broken, broken, twisting, breaking, broken.
The Gravedigger: I can't carry both of you.
CAn you carry take Rhu, Azi?
Aziraphale: Yes.
The Gravedigger: Great.
Don't go insane, RAdek, or you're being dragged.
Onwards!
Radek: I don't plan to.
Ganelon: Onwards.
Wen: do we make it safely out of the building?
Apheori (GM): You charge down the hall and up the stairs.
Everyone roll.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
13
)
=
13
Aziraphale:
rolling 1d20
(
13
)
=
13
Rhu:
rolling 1d20
(
10
)
=
10
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
14
)
=
14
Wen: /me pokes Greibel
The Gravedigger:
rolling 1D20
(
7
)
=
7
Apheori (GM): Azira: You stumble at the noise. Now you can see it too.
Rhu recovers slightly but not very much.
Greibel also recovers slightly and gets confused.
A stream of water comes down the stairs - not enough to carry any of you off your feet, but enough to at least get your feet wet.
The Gravedigger: THE FISH.
Greibel: Hmmmm wet....wet....mumble
Wen: what do I see?
Apheori (GM): Things... twisting, crunching. It affects your balance.
Wen: I think we just keep running?
Unless we can't.
Apheori (GM): You all keep running! You make it back to the lobby full of bodies.
The fish you saw before is now completely rotted, as though it had been sitting out for days, perhaps weeks. There is a horrible, partly dry puddle around it.
The Gravedigger: Well, that's not great.
Frezak (GM): is the stoner still struggling?
Apheori (GM): Also the swarm of chickens apparently followed you.
Stoner: Roll!
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
7
)
=
7
Apheori (GM): The stoner is completely out of it now.
The Gravedigger: Aw, hell. Chickens!
Apheori (GM): Everyone roll!
Aziraphale:
rolling 1d20
(
9
)
=
9
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
8
)
=
8
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20
(
3
)
=
3
The Gravedigger:
rolling 1D20
(
17
)
=
17
Rhu:
rolling 1d20
(
5
)
=
5
Apheori (GM): Eeer.
Aziraphale, Rhu: It feels like reality is falling apart at the seams. Things are twisting, pulling, rocking.
Greibel: You're a chicken.
Greibel clucks confusedly
Ganelon: He should just Wild Shape into one.
Save us the confusion.
Apheori (GM): Radek: Things are shifting oddly and there are some odd noises, but you're more or less on top of it.
Gravedigger: You're firmly rooted in reality. Congratulations.
The Gravedigger groans.
The Gravedigger: WHY ARE YOU PEOPLE ALL FUCKING INSANE.
Apheori (GM): Greibel turns into a swarm of chickens.
Wen: what can we do other than run like hell at this point?
Apheori (GM): He heads toward the sopping wet undead chickens.
You can... stop Greibel.
Frezak (GM): HOW?
Apheori (GM): Greibel: Roll a d20.
I have no idea.
Greibel SWARMS AROUND THE SWARM OF OTHER SWARMERS
Frezak (GM): Wellll.
Aziraphale grabs one of the chickens
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
19
)
=
19
Frezak (GM): If he's a Swarm, then he's once creature.
I'd like to make a Grab attack.
Apheori (GM): Greibel comes to his senses.
Frezak (GM): Oh, good.
Apheori (GM): Make your grab.
Greibel: oik
Apheori (GM): You don't know he's come to his senses.
That still stands.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+4
(
14
)
+4
=
18
Vs... what, Gan?
Ref?
Ganelon: Yes.
Greibel: Ref is 12
Apheori (GM): You manage to grab him.
Frezak (GM): I have most likely grabbed the swarm.
Apheori (GM): The undead chickens take this as a sign of hostility and attack.
Frezak (GM): By just scooping them um with my shield and shovel.
Dustpan-style.
Oh, crap.
The Gravedigger: WATCH OUT
CHICKENS
Ganelon: Thundering Armor!
Greibel: Oh no, the undead chickens!
Ganelon: I wish to make Gravy's armor repel chickens.
Rhu: Run!
Apheori (GM): ...sure.
Greibel agrees with Rhu
Ganelon: It's actually a power - just a push 1 away from him on a single target.
Greibel ans also is probably an elf again?
Ganelon: And it makes his armor a little better for a while.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: If you turned into an elf, you're an elf.
Frezak (GM): Are we in initiative?
Greibel: Okay, I did
Apheori (GM): Okay.
I don't know at this point.
What happens now, knowledgeable people?
Bear Soup Guy: CHICKEN BATTLE
Ganelon: Is this a fight?
Frezak (GM): If it's a /fight/, then we roll initiative.
Apheori (GM): It... could be. I don't know how fights work.
Frezak (GM): it's a monster, right?
Apheori (GM): What if you all try to run away? Would it still be a fight?
Frezak (GM): Ehhhh.
Ganelon: It could be or not be a fight.
Apheori (GM): The chickens decided to attack. Other than that it's up in the air.
Frezak (GM): Then it's gonna be initiatives.
And we can try to run on our turns.
Or somethign >.>
Ganelon: Rolling init.
Apheori (GM): ...sure.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
2
)
=
2
Frezak (GM): Initiative
6
Ganelon: Here's a cool R20 feature for you lot.
He's got it figured out already, I see.
Frezak (GM): I made a macro thing.
Ganelon: Select your token and type /roll 1d20+(whatever your initiative mod is) .
Wen: I don't have one I think
Frezak (GM): You have Azi, Wen.
Ganelon: Then type "& {tracker}" without the space before those brackets.
Apheori (GM): Frezak: Can you make a chicken token?
Frezak (GM): >.>
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1D20+0
(
7
)
+0
=
7
Apheori (GM): It doesn't need to look like chickens.
Just... so there's something there.
Wen: so it's... 0?
that's what it says under INIT
Ganelon: http://www.videogamesartwork.com/sites/default/files/images/image/1377110134/guildwars2_creatures_undead_chicken_concept_art_by_brian_lawver.jpg
Boom.
Apheori (GM): Wen: Right.
Ganelon: Thank you Guild Wars 2 for undead Orrian chickens.
Frezak (GM): CHICKEN.
Apheori (GM): Hee.
Aziraphale:
rolling 1d20
(
16
)
=
16
Bear Soup Guy: AH CHICKEN
Wen: ...wait what o_O
Rhu:
rolling 1d20 + 2
(
9
)
+2
=
11
Bear Soup Guy: I rolled a 7 by the way ^^^
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 + 4
(
4
)
+4
=
8
Wen: am I supposed to do something at this point? >.>
Apheori (GM): Good question.
GUYS.
Oh, wait, it's up to you.
Fight or run?
Bear Soup Guy: We lost Frezak D=
Aziraphale: Do we try to fend of the fiendish fowl, or do we flee for our er, faces?
fend off*
Ganelon: Does Apheori have monster stats for a horde of undead chickens?
Apheori (GM): I think so.
Ganelon: Well, let's wait on Frezak for now.
Aziraphale: brb bathroom
Wen: er, OOC
not sure where that would be in game >.>
Bear Soup Guy: Aziraphale was /very/ afraid of the chickens :>
Wen: hee
Apheori (GM): So if folks try to run away, how do we handle that?
Ganelon: Put an exit point on the map for us to reach?
Apheori (GM): Like that?
Ganelon: I suppose?
That's rather close, though. People can move 6 squares per action.
And 12 if they aren't attacking on the same turn. 16 if they choose to run.
Apheori (GM): There.
Bear Soup Guy: masterfully drawn
Aziraphale: So er, do we fight the patient chicken?
Or do we try to run?
Frezak (GM): Right.
i'll need some moments to load pictures >.>
Dude.
Gravy has never buried a swarm of undead chickens.
THis is Blong, God of Shovels, bringing him a gift.
Apheori (GM): You mean Amri Dan?
Well, here's the thing - Azira is up first. So he can do whatever.
WHATEVER.
Right?
That is how it works.
Right?
Ganelon: Basically.
Wen: but do we try to run?
and how hard is it to kill the chicken?
Ganelon: Can't know right now.
Apheori (GM): Pick one.
Greibel: CHICKEN BATTLE
Aziraphale looks around at everyone else
Apheori (GM): You can run. You can attack. You can cower.
Frezak (GM): I vote for smitage.
Apheori (GM): You can stand around confused.
You can try to grab Radek and run.
Wen: Do I have my sword back?
Apheori (GM): No.
But you have a spade.
Aziraphale: Okay, let's fight this thing.
Wen: so do I choose one of my at-will powers and do a roll based on that?
Apheori (GM): Guys, don't die.
Seriously, if you die here, you're screwed.
Also reality is still being freakishly warped and crap.
Frezak (GM): You're a paladin, right?
Apheori (GM): With lots of horrible noises.
Wen: HALP >.> so one minor action and one standard action, right? And I just pick two, and do two rolls based on the the descriptions. Did I get that right?
Ganelon: You get a standard, move, and minor.
Standards can become moves and moves can become minors.
So you could do three minors in one turn if you wanted, but it would be a pretty big waste.
Wen: so do I just say what action I'm taking and roll?
Ganelon: Well, you'll most likely need to be in range of the chickens first.
Wen: If it's melee, I need to be adjacent, correct?
Apheori (GM): What does this swarm attack aura 1 mean?
Frezak (GM): Means that it has an aura radiatin 1 square from it's edges.
Apheori (GM): Is that always there, or what?
Frezak (GM): yep.
Apheori (GM): Chicken aura!
Wen: okay, so first I move.. Tell me if I'm doing it wrong
Frezak (GM): wait, there's a thing for auras.
Apheori (GM): You have a gun, too.
Oh, neat.
Frezak (GM): There, secret GM aura.
Apheori (GM): Okay, so you moved. Now you can do a standard action and a minor.
Wen: so say if I want to use Holy Strike, I first roll a 1d20 + 7 for attack and then if it works, damage?
Frezak (GM): if the card says +7, then yep.
Ganelon: Most likely +6, since your weapon changed.
Wen: okay, here goes
Aziraphale:
rolling 1d20 + 6
(
20
)
+6
=
26
Frezak (GM): Niiiice
Ganelon: Well, that's a crit.
Frezak (GM): max damage!
Aziraphale: damage = 12 then.
Apheori (GM): Should it do extra damage since it's like holy or something on an undead mass?
Ganelon: Damage is 14.
Frezak (GM): What damage DOES Holy Strike do?
Ganelon: Because you're using an "axe".
Frezak (GM): Keywords?
Ganelon: I'm guessing 1[W] + str (4).
And yeah, is it radiant damage?
Wen: it is
Ganelon: Undead tend to hate that.
Frezak (GM): Then it should take an extra 5 damage from radiant.
Wen: plus bonus equal to wisdom mod (+3) if marked target
Not sure what "marked" means..
Frezak (GM): I think that's part of your... Divine Challenge?
Ganelon: Yes.
All Defender classes can apply marks.
Apheori (GM): Since that's a minor action, you could have done that too.
Do you want to tack it in?
Ganelon: A generic mark means that the marked target gets a -2 to hit if it makes an attack that does not include you as a target.
Wen: oh
Ganelon: A paladin's mark does something extra.
Wen: Urgh, yeah, tack that on
so it's [W] + str (+4) +3 for marked + whatever due to crit and different weapon and radiant
...can someone sort that out?
Frezak (GM): battleaxe is 1D10, soo
10+4+3+5.
22.
Wen: whoo!
Apheori (GM): Neat!
Frezak (GM): BUT.
It's a swarm.
Apheori (GM): Oh.
Frezak (GM): It takes half damage from Ranged and Melee attacks.
Apheori (GM): What does that do?
Wen: does the +5 come from crit or radiant?
Apheori (GM): Ah.
Frezak (GM): Radiant.
Ganelon: Radiant.
Crits deal bonus damage when you have magic weapons.
Frezak (GM): Crit is just max damage unless you have a magical or High Crit weapon.
Ganelon: Right, yes, that too.
Frezak (GM): And Marked.
Wen: okay, so damage is 11?
Frezak (GM): Yup.
Wen: it looks like marked makes the chicken take hits when attacking, not when attacked.
Frezak (GM): Yep.
Ganelon: Yes, except with Holy Strike.
Apheori (GM): Oh gods Rhu's character sheet is horrific.
Ganelon: Yes it is.
I volunteer Frezak to make it readable later.
Apheori (GM): Can someone PLEASE reformat it for me at some point?
Like, remake it.
Completely.
Ganelon: Because I did two already.
Frezak (GM): Sure, i'll do that.
At some point >.>
Apheori (GM): In the meantime can you play Rhu because I can't read this?
Wen: WHOO I FINISHED A TURN.
>.>
Frezak (GM): I don't have his (bad) sheet.
And I don't have the webs to load it.
Apheori (GM): What's a whirlwind charge?
Frezak (GM): No idea.
Apheori (GM): Er.
Gan? Can you figure this out? >.>
Frezak (GM): Okay, power names and stat distribution, please.
Ganelon: I can't see it either.
Apheori (GM): That's the problem - I HAVE NO IDEA.
Frezak (GM): JUST THE NAMES.
WHirlwind Charge is an Encounter power.
Apheori (GM): http://dump.zaori.org/Rhu.pdf
Frezak (GM): GAH.
Apheori (GM): Gan: ^
Melee Basic Attack: By weapon, damage 1[W] [standard action]
Ranged Basic Attack: By weapon, damage 1[W]+2 [dexterity bonus] [standard action]
Bull Rush: +0 [base strength attack] vs fortitude [standard action]
Grab: +0 [base strength attack] vs reflex [standard action]
Move grabbed target: +0 [base strength attack] vs fortitude [standard action]
Apheori (GM): Escape: +7 [acrobatics] vs reflex / +0 [athletics] vs fortitude [move action]
Bond of Retribution [Level 1]
Radiant Vengeance [Level 1]
That mess?
Frezak (GM): His ability scores?
Okay, so.
Apheori (GM): Strength
10 (+0)
Constitution 12 (+1)
Dexterity
15 (+2)
Intelligence 14 (+2)
Apheori (GM): Wisdom
19 (+4)
Charisma
8 (-1)
Frezak (GM): He will.... swear an oath of enmity on the swarm.
Then he'll move.
And charge using WHirlwing Charge.
Since the only enemy adjacent to him is his oath dude, he rolls twice.
rolling 1D20+7
(
3
)
+7
=
10
rolling 1D20+7
(
6
)
+7
=
13
Frezak (GM): He'll pick the higher number.
WHich still misses.
Unless the swarm has 13 AC.
Apheori (GM): Nope.
>.<
Frezak (GM): he will be sad.
And end his turn.
Apheori (GM): Thank you.
So the chickens...
The chickens try to flow all over Aziraphale.
What does necrotic mean?
Frezak (GM): It deals Necrotic damage.
Ganelon: Nothing unless he's vulnerable or resistant to it.
Frezak (GM): If Az has either resist or vulnerable necrotic, things happen.
Otherwise, nothing special.
Other than a sense of ickyness.
Ganelon: The only way a level 1 character can be resistant to it without magic equipment is if they're a vampire, though.
Wen: so I'm in trouble?
Ganelon: Eh, damage is damage.
Radek can fix you up.
Apheori (GM): You're probably going to be icky.
Ganelon: He can even fix ickiness.
Frezak (GM): It'll have -2 to hit because of the mark.
Ganelon: And other forms of filth.
...Eh? It's attacking the guy who marked it.
Frezak (GM): oh, right >.>
I thought it was Rhu.
JUST ROLL AND IGNORE ME
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 + 4
(
11
)
+4
=
15
Awwww.
Wen: no
Frezak (GM): Vs fort.
Wen: as the target, I'm damaged
Apheori (GM): Yeah, it failed.
Wen: \o/
Frezak (GM): What's Az's fort? O.o
Wen: 16
Frezak (GM): cripes.
Ganelon: Lucky you.
Hey, Lhoryn has 18. It's not that unheard of.
Wen: the divine challenge thingy only reduces damage if the targets don't include me
Greibel: BRB BECAUSE MY SISTER'S DOGS JUST WENT FUCKING INSANE AND ATTACKED EACH OTHER
Ganelon: Sounds serious
Apheori (GM): It's greibel's turn.
Frezak (GM): >.>
Wen: >.<
Apheori (GM): So hopefully the dog won't do anything too bad.
Frezak (GM): <.<
Apheori (GM): Oh, buggrit, I forgot to have you all roll sanity checks.
Everyone roll a d20!
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
2
)
=
2
Rhu:
rolling 1d20
(
15
)
=
15
Ganelon: I don't believe in chickens.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20
(
8
)
=
8
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
2
)
=
2
Aziraphale:
rolling 1d20
(
6
)
=
6
Apheori (GM) cacjles.
Apheori (GM): Cackling, even.
Okay, Azira, you think the chicken swarm got you even though it didn't. This may or may not have any real impact on anything.
Aziraphale: Ow.
Apheori (GM): Radek, Greibel: Reality seems to be shaking itself apart. Now the chickens are still there, but it's really... crazy.
Gravedigger: You're going to get to bury a swarm of chickens. It's going to be awesome.
Frezak (GM): FUCK YEAAAAAHHHHH
Glad to be Gravy.
Apheori (GM): Should we just play for Greibel for now?
Note that he's going crazy.
Frezak (GM): Gaaaaaan!
Ganelon: Uh.
Frezak (GM): Throw some crap and run in circles.
Ganelon: Fire Hawk!
rolling 1d20+4
(
15
)
+4
=
19
Reflex.
Apheori (GM): Yeah.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d8+4
(
7
)
+4
=
11
Single target, so half that, and the hawk is watching this swarm of chickens carefully.
Meaning it gets to make opportunity attacks against them.
And if the place is really looking that bad, I suppose he'd like to flee.
To there, if you please.
That is all.
Apheori (GM): Thankee.
Frezak (GM): Gravy will give the swarm a calculating look.
Apheori (GM): These chickens are going to feel shovelled.
Frezak (GM): Then, twirling his shovel, walk to here.
Wen: Is there any strategic advantage to some of the party fleeing but others staying to fight?
Apheori (GM): Wen: Congratulations: Your first attack in a DnD thing was... WITH A SHOVEL.
Wen: \o/
Frezak (GM): Ranged dudes want to stay away.
Ganelon: The good news is that I can easily fix your sword when we have time and are not going insane.
Wen: I see.
Frezak (GM): I will charge, I think.
Goring Charge!
rolling 1D20+9
(
17
)
+9
=
26
Vs AC.
Apheori (GM): Yup.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D6+4
(
3
)
+4
=
7
And it's prone.
Imagine that I just batted a bunch away and they're trying to regroup.
It is now raining undead chickens.
i'll use a free action to supersede Azi's mark with my own.
And end my turn.
Aziraphale glares
Wen: so combat actions are supposed to be done OOC?
Ganelon: "Pay attention to me!"
"No! I'm the bigger threat!"
Frezak (GM): Read your power.
You still get your burning bonus.
Apheori (GM): Wen: Works either way.
But generally speaking as your character you're... well, speaking.
As your character.
Ganelon: I just prefer to describe actions during combat like this.
Radek does not call out his attacks.
Wen: okay.
The Gravedigger: BEHOLD THE DIGGER OF YOUR GRAVE.
Ganelon: So here's a rules question, Frezak.
The Gravedigger: YOUR HOLE AWAIS
Frezak (GM): *awaits >.>
Ganelon: Do my weird burst powers get halved damage?
The ones that target single enemies using bursts.
Frezak (GM): let's see.
Ganelon: Also, do they get a penalty because of prone chickens?
Frezak (GM): Hmm.
Ganelon: I mean, they're... sort of ranged?
Frezak (GM): It's a single target burst.
So it's a burst, nor ranged or melee.
Ganelon: Does that mean they're vulnerable to it?
Frezak (GM): And prone, as I understand, won't have any effect on it.
Umm.
Yes, I suppose.
no
Um.
>.>
Frezak (GM): Mechanically, it does look like a burst.
It's a close burst, what more.
So... yes.
Ganelon: Then you get an Ethereal Chill.
[Implement Attack]
rolling 1d20+5+0
(
3
)
+5+0
=
8
Or not.
Frezak (GM): gah.
Ganelon: Move to here and end my turn.
Apheori (GM): Radek: You trip on a corpse and fall on your face.
Frezak (GM): what;
Apheori (GM): He rolled a 2.
Frezak (GM): RAAADEEEEEEK
Apheori (GM) points up.
Apheori (GM): Actually I'm not sure if it was a corpse or not. But whatever.
He tripped on SOMETHING that wasn't there.
Ganelon: I'm prone. Turn ends regardless.
Frezak (GM): A less mobile dead chicken.
Okay, so here's the cool thing.
For starting next to the swarm, the swarm gets a free peck at Azi.
BUT.
Since /I/ have it marked, I get a slam as an interrupt to that attack.
SO i'll start.
Frezak (GM): With WARDEN'S FURY.
rolling 1D20+6+2
(
18
)
+6+2
=
26
rolling 1D10+4
(
4
)
+4
=
8
And it grants Combat Advantage until the end of my next turn.
Now it can peck the paladin.
Apheori (GM): Azira: roll 1d20
Before you do anything else.
Wen:
rolling 1d20
(
15
)
=
15
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Bear Soup Guy: Okay, I'm back, sorry
I'm dog-sitting
Apheori (GM): Frezak: Was that 8 damage or less than 8?
Bear Soup Guy: And one of the dogs is an idiot
Ganelon: Sitting on dogs?
Frezak (GM): It's half 8 >.>
Wen: are the dogs all alive still?
Bear Soup Guy: Yeah, one of them just got a bloodied nose
Unfortunately not the stupid antagonistic one >_<
Apheori (GM): Frezak: What's a basic attck?
Frezak (GM): Any attack with a circle around the symbol.
Swarm of Beaks for this guy.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 + 6
(
5
)
+6
=
11
Azi: Go.
Wen: okay
Frezak (GM): SMITE IT.
Wen: I'm going to move next to Gravy
Apheori (GM): Oh, and everyone else, roll a d20.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20
(
7
)
=
7
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20
(
11
)
=
11
Wen: and use a forbidding strike
rolling 1d20 + 6
(
5
)
+6
=
11
...does that hit?
Apheori (GM): Against ac?
No.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
5
)
=
5
Wen: yes
argh
okay, so minor action
Rhu:
rolling 1d20
(
11
)
=
11
Wen: what is a "day" in game time?
(for the daily actions)
Ganelon: 6 hours of rest gets them back.
Uninterrupted rest.
Wen: er.
is it a bad idea to use a daily action at this stage?
Ganelon: Well, what time is it on Sarathi?
Apheori (GM): Probably evening.
You've been tromping around all day.
Ganelon: Then you can probably get away with using it.
Apheori (GM): And now you're all losing your minds.
Ganelon: As we'll sleep soon regardless.
Apheori (GM): If you don't lose your minds first.
Wen: actually it'd be useless, since I already did my attack this turn.
Ganelon: Not so.
You have an ACTION POINT!
Which is to say, all characters have one action point at the start of each day and get one more after every two fights.
Wen: so I can have one extra attack?
Ganelon: And you may spend one per round to get an extra standard action on your turn.
Which you can use for whatever you want.
Wen: err okay
so I use Divine Strength (+4 on next attack)
and again do a Forbidding Strike using the action point
rolling 1d20 + 6
(
5
)
+6
=
11
Bear Soup Guy: Okay guys I think I have to go
Wen: ...that still isn't enough, right?
Bear Soup Guy: Because more dog stuff
Wen: >.<
good luck BSG.
Bear Soup Guy: Thanks
>_<
Ganelon: Hm.
Wen: well, there goes my turn anyway
Ganelon: Can Rhu not give people a reroll?
Wen: what's the swarm's AC anyway?
Apheori (GM): 15
Ganelon: Oh, also, you had combat advantage for this attack (+2 to hit)
Apheori (GM): And dude, you're all elves. You should get a free re-roll anyway, no?
Ganelon: Not at all.
Frezak (GM): What mechanical race is Azi?
Ganelon: Human.
Wen: er
Ganelon: (Nissai)
Wen: isn't that a kind of elf?
Frezak (GM): Then it's just Greibel that has Elven Accuracy.
Apheori (GM): Rhu does too according to his thing.
Ganelon: There are kinds of elves in 4E that don't have Elven Accuracy.
Eladrin, Drow, and Half-Elves don't, for instance.
It's only available to a specific kind.
Apheori (GM): Ah.
Meh, just keep beating on this thing so it all dies, will y'all?
Ganelon: But Rhu can Channel Divinity to give someone else a reroll against his oath target, I think.
Apheori (GM): If he can, can you make it happen?
I plead confusion.
Ganelon: Am I mistaken, Frezak?
Frezak (GM): yeah he can give one reroll per encounter.
Best not waste it on an at-will >.>
Apheori (GM): Okay, moving on.
Does Rhu get attacked by chickens too?
Frezak (GM): yup
Ganelon: Do you get to punish them for it, or is that a 1/round deal?
Apheori (GM): Does the guy who marked it get to smack it again?
What he said.
Frezak (GM): Did Azy reapply his mark?
Wen: No.
so it's still your mark.
Frezak (GM): Then he just has -2 to hit.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 + 4
(
4
)
+4
=
8
Ganelon: Shame on you, chickens.
Apheori (GM): So Gan... what does Rhu do?
Frezak (GM): Um.
Ganelon: I don't know!
Frezak (GM): He will shift 1.
Ganelon: I'm already playing Greibel!
Apheori (GM): Oh.
Frezak (GM): And thennnn.
Apheori (GM): Okay. >.>
Frezak (GM): Radiant Vengeance.
Apheori (GM): I only slightly mixed you guys up!
Frezak (GM): wait, no >.>
Apheori (GM): Whatever that is.
Frezak (GM): Bond Of Retribution.
Ellemerr: Who is Rhu? Should I play Rhu? I don't think I'd be a very good Rhu. *shifty eyes* If Lokshmi comes back I could give it a try!
Frezak (GM): Vengeance is ranged.
Retributionising.
rolling 1D20+8
(
3
)
+8
=
11
Apheori (GM): You'd be an excellent Lokshmi, but she ain't coming back.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+8
(
19
)
+8
=
27
Ellemerr: Aaaaaw
Frezak (GM): I WILL TAKE THE SECOND ROLL I THINK.
rolling 2D6+4
(
3
+
4
)
+4
=
11
Radiant, so 16.
And halved because swarm.
and that's it for him.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 + 6 on Rhu...
(
17
)
+6
=
23
Ganelon: One of these defenders ought to be doing something about that.
Frezak (GM): Umm.
Wen: Hmm?
Apheori (GM): What?
Ganelon: Am I mistaken?
Frezak (GM): Yeah, Azi's Challenge triggers.
Wen: wait what? but wasn't it replaced with your mark?
Frezak (GM): If you read your power...
Doesn't have to be someone marked BY you at the time.
Just someoen that you attacked and is marked.
Apheori (GM): So why didn't it activate when the swarm attacked Rhu during Rhu's turn?
Frezak (GM): Because we're dumb and don't track things right in our heads.
Apheori (GM): Oh.
Ganelon: That's supposed to be Wen's job.
Wen: it also says "a new mark supersedes a mark that was already in place". I thought that meant the effects no longer apply once the mark is not in effect.
Ganelon: But he's new to this and neither Frezak or I have ever played real paladins.
The most paladin experience I have is with a character who calls herself one but has no ability to defend people and no support from her god.
Frezak (GM): Ummm >.>
I DONT KNOW.
Ganelon: Who marked it last?
Frezak (GM): Me.
Wen: Gravy.
Frezak (GM): We'll go with Azi not triggering.
Ganelon: Then he gets his punishment action.
Frezak (GM): I already did on Azi's turn.
It's an Immediate Interrupt.
Ganelon: Once per round, then?
Right.
Ugh, I hate that rule.
Nothing happens then, just roll the damage.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d6 + 3
(
2
)
+3
=
5
What does ongoing damage mean?
Ganelon: At the start of that person's turn, they take the number specified.
Frezak (GM): ongoing 3.
At the beginning of each of his turns, he takes 3 damage.
At the end of his turn he can try to qave against it.
Ganelon: At the end of their turn they do a saving throw (roll d20) and if it's 10 or higher they stop taking ongoing damage.
Frezak (GM): *save
Ganelon: There are other ways to get saving throws. Also penalties/bonuses that can be applied to them. None are in play right now.
Apheori (GM): Swarm of chickens assaulted. Next.
Oh, wait, it was prone.
That might have affected something.
Frezak (GM): Ohhhh.
THat's true.
WE ARE STUPID.
That's -2 to attack rolls while prone >.>
Apheori (GM): Combat is hard. >.<
Ganelon: It was prone, and marked, so -4.
But she rolled so high I think it hit anyways.
Frezak (GM): yeah.
Ganelon: Result of 19? Yeah, it hit.
Frezak (GM): It will probably spend a move action to stand, though.
Apheori (GM): AGH THIS CHARACTER SHEET IS HORRIBLE.
Okay, it stood at some point.
NEXT.
Ganelon: Far out.
Have another hawk.
rolling 1d20+4
(
12
)
+4
=
16
Reflex?
Apheori (GM): Yuh.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d8+4
(
6
)
+4
=
10
Apheori (GM): Is that halved?
Ganelon: Yes.
Only Radek's damage isn't.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Ganelon: Or if Gravy does some area attack.
Apheori (GM): Also Griebel is crazy.
Frezak (GM): No surprise there.
Apheori (GM): He should turn into something random.
What all can he turn into?
Ganelon: Pretty much any animal.
Frezak (GM): Any animal of roughly equivalent mass.
A large pig.
A midget elephant.
Ganelon: He has a... preference for large guardian sorts, though.
Apheori (GM): He turns into a moose.
Frezak (GM): A small moose, though.
A mooseling.
Mooselet.
Apheori (GM): Yes.
HE'S A MOOSE NOW.
Frezak (GM): Okay.
Gan.
What's his Encounter,
*?
Isn't it the prone if marked thing?
Gan?
Frezak (GM): AM I GONE AGAIN?
Apheori (GM): No.
But he seems to be.
Ganelon: It is.
Frezak (GM): WOULD THAT NOT BE NICE NOW?
Also he has Grounding Shot.
I think.
Ganelon: ...Why would he have Grounding Shot?
Apheori (GM): The moose?
Ganelon: He doesn't even use a ranged weapon.
Apheori (GM): And he's a moose.
Frezak (GM): RAnged powers.
Ganelon: Man, I don't even know.
His encounter is that spirit wolf thing.
But its range is 5.
Frezak (GM): Nevermind >.>
Apheori (GM): Moose.
Ganelon: And yes, he can't do it as a moose.
So his turn is pretty much over.
He runs in circles.
Frezak (GM): Gravytime.
Apheori (GM): Appropriate.
Frezak (GM): I'll open with Roots Of Stone.
I am flanking with RHu so I have Combat advantage.
rolling 1D20+8
(
7
)
+8
=
15
Wen: (brb)
Frezak (GM): AC?
Apheori (GM): 15
Frezak (GM): Ties are hits.
So...
rolling 1D10+4
(
4
)
+4
=
8
Damage is not halved on this.
And if the swarm moves away from me before my next turn, it'll fall prone.
My interrupt is no longer granting CA to allies.
Frezak (GM): And my turn is over.
Ganelon: Aren't they also vulnerable to area moves?
Apheori (GM): The building feels like it's going to fall down.
Frezak (GM): Oh, right.
Another 5 damage.
WHich building?
Apheori (GM): The one you're in.
Frezak (GM): I thought we were outside.
Apheori (GM): I mean, it's giving the feeling. But it's not actually... it still seems structurally sound.
Frezak (GM): Just the sounds its making,
*?
Apheori (GM): You got up the stairs, got swarmed by chickens, and then decided to fight instead of going the rest of the way out the door.
Sounds for you, yes.
Ganelon: I stand up.
Apheori (GM): Radek sees a bit more.
Ganelon: What do I see?
Apheori (GM): The place... twisting.
Cracks in the walls.
Cracks in the air. Shimmering.
Ganelon: Making this attack through Azi, then.
Because he's in range.
[Implement Attack]
rolling 1d20+5+0
(
11
)
+5+0
=
16
Reflex.
Apheori (GM): Aye.
Ganelon: What's the vulnerability for area moves?
5?
Apheori (GM): Mhm.
Frezak (GM): yup
Ganelon:
rolling 1d8+5+5
(
6
)
+5+5
=
16
Not halved.
If the swarm attacks Azi, it takes 2 cold damage.
Frezak (GM): Dude.
Ganelon: Hm?
Frezak (GM): Why didn't you do Thundering?
Bah, nevermind.
Ganelon: Because I would rather we get out of here injured than take a single turn longer than necessary?
My turn is over.
Apheori (GM): Everyone roll a d20.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
9
)
=
9
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20
(
12
)
=
12
That's for Gravy.
Wen:
rolling 1d20
(
13
)
=
13
Rhu:
rolling 1d20
(
13
)
=
13
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
17
)
=
17
Apheori (GM): Okay, so chickens attack Azi.
Aziraphale: Ow.
Apheori (GM): Does anyone have a mark that would activlate?
Frezak (GM): I'll interrupt.
rolling 1D20+8
(
5
)
+8
=
13
AC.
Apheori (GM): Nope.
Frezak (GM): Curses.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 + 6 ac on Azi.
(
11
)
+6
=
17
Okay, have at your turn.
Wen: wait, so it didn't do anything because my AC > 17, yes?
Apheori (GM): Right.
Wen: Okay, so Aziraphale uses a Divine Challenge on the swarm.
and then a Forbidding Strike
rolling 1d20 + 6
(
8
)
+6
=
14
...damn it.
I forfeit the move.
so my turn ends.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Chickens attack Rhu. Do you interrupt it or something?
Ganelon: No, it just takes damage first.
Frezak (GM): I think Azi burns it.
Wen: -2 penalty on attack
Apheori (GM): Ah, okay.
Wen: also +3 radiant damage on attack
Ganelon: But before it makes the attack, it burns... right?
Wen: (against it)
Ganelon: Also I think it's more than +3.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 + 6
(
8
)
+6
=
14
Frezak (GM): it takes 3 +Cha mod radiant damage for attacking.
Ganelon: I'm pretty sure I gave you a feat that makes it + strength mod as well.
Wen: my cha mod is 0 though.
Apheori (GM): It misses.
Wen: doesn't say on the character sheet at least
Apheori (GM): So it takes 3 + 4 + 5 damage?
Wen: it just deals extra radiant damage
Apheori (GM): Oh.
Wen: I don't know where the +4 +5 came from
the +3, yes.
since it's the first time it's attacking someone else before the end of the turn.
Ganelon: You have a feat that adds your strength modifier to that damage.
Frezak (GM): at least 3+5 since it's 3 radiant.
Ganelon: And because it's radiant, it takes another +5.
Wen: I can link to my character sheet if it isn't against the rules?
I don't see it at least :/
Apheori (GM): https://docs.google.com/file/d/0B9qA2rGREpTJUXczLWlJZFAtRFk/edit?pli=1
Whatever.
Wen: or http://uncy.co/y/az
Apheori (GM): Whatever.
IT GOT HARMED.
Frezak (GM): RHU
Ganelon: Mighty Challenge.
Frezak (GM): WILL POKE IT.
Ganelon: The description sucks but that's what it does.
Apheori (GM): AWESOME.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+8
(
11
)
+8
=
19
rolling 1D20+8
(
16
)
+8
=
24
HITS.
Wen: urgh, okay.
Apheori (GM): Rhu successfully pokes it.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 2D6+4
(
2
+
5
)
+4
=
11
Radiant.
So... +5:16
halved it 8.
WHOOO
Apheori (GM): Whu successfully kills it.
Ellemerr: You kill the chicken-swarm just as I've read up! Whoo!
Apheori (GM): Bloody horribly boring chicken swarm.
Frezak (GM): Gravy will use his shield as a carrying thing to carry as many dead chickens and he ca;
WELL.
Ellemerr: I thought it was hillarious. xD
Frezak (GM): It SHOULD have been making multiple attacks.
Apheori (GM): Well, maybe.
Frezak:
Wen: I'm just glad it's dead.
Apheori (GM): WHAY DIDN'T YOU SAY SO.
Frezak (GM): It can bite twice on it's turn and had 2 AP.
BECAUSE YOU HAVE OT LEARN TO READ MONSTER SHEETS.
Wen: IT'S DEAD.
DING DONG
Frezak (GM): And I FORGOT.
Apheori (GM): Dude, I don't know what any of this stuff means.
Wen: THE SWARM IS DEAD.
Apheori (GM): So I just ignored the bits I didn't understand.
Which was most of them.
Wen: where's the next convenient break point by the way? I kind of want to get dinner >.>
Frezak (GM): >.>
Apheori (GM): >.>
What did Rhu need to roll to get rid of the necrotic thingy?
Ellemerr: I've just read up! *flails* I have to go to bed sooon!
Apheori (GM): Or can it just go away now?
Frezak (GM): If you don't understand things, please ASK.
Apheori (GM): I did!
I asked about them as they came up!
Frezak (GM): It's easier if it just vanishes.
Apheori (GM): So y'all killed a thing. Greibel's a moose.
What now?
There are cracks everywhere.
Frezak (GM): I'm carrying as many as I can outside.
Ganelon: FLEE.
Apheori (GM): And funny noises.
Did Gravy seriously pick up the chickens and take them with?
Frezak (GM): yes?
Apheori (GM): Who grabs the moose?
Frezak (GM): PIling them on his shield like a platter.
Aziraphale: I do.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
YOU ALL FLEE.
You wind up in the dusk.
There's smoke rising from several buildings.
Frezak (GM): I look for dirt.
Apheori (GM): SHIP is gone.
You're in a parking lot.
There's mostly just cement and asphalt.
There are some potted trees, though.
You could use one of those.
Frezak (GM): that'll do.
I'll uproot the tree.
And bury the chickens.
Apheori (GM): Strength check on tree...?
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+4
(
11
)
+4
=
15
I can just spadechop the roots.
Apheori (GM): It doesn't budge,
You should do that.
Frezak (GM): I will busy myself with the removal of the tree, then.
Apheori (GM): Okay, so you're doing that...
Perhaps this would be a good point to stop. >.>
Ellemerr grumbles.
Apheori (GM): What?
Wen: My stomach concurs >.>
Apheori (GM): As does mine.
It wants lunch.
Also we're missing two of five people already.
Ellemerr: Fiiiiine, go eat your food. I'll find other things to read.
Ganelon: Well, first off, I have some minor matters of business as Radek to take care of.
Firstly, is the world outside still crazy?
Apheori (GM): Much less so.
But yes.
Especially the sky.
And the boats.
Ganelon: Alright then.
Apheori (GM): And the light.
Wen: Can Radek report back without SHIP?
Apheori (GM): He can try.
Wen: damn it, the caps lock indicator thingy on my computer blocks the text input box >.<
Ganelon: I'll save that for when everyone is here.
Wen: Okay, so do we stop here?
Ganelon: I suppose. Just remind me to fix your sword next time
Wen: Okay.
Ganelon: It will cost the equivalent of three gold coins worth of magic dust.
That's very little.
I'll drum up a tab of how much magic dust belongs to each person as we find things for Radek to destroy, though.
Frezak (GM): We'd need magic things, though.
Ganelon: Yes.
Frezak (GM): Unless we melt down someone's arm.
Ganelon: Basically, I'm putting this ritual on his tab.
He owes me three pinches of residuum.
Frezak (GM): Greibel will pay you in drugs.
And I'm sorry for the boring fight >.>
Ganelon: It's fine.
Wen: so do we agree on a time for the next session or...?
Ganelon: I'm fine with "not tomorrow".
Any time after tomorrow is suitable.
Frezak (GM): Yeah, I have a game HOPEFULLY WITH GAN tomorrow.
Ganelon: Of course with me.
Apheori (GM): Can everyone make it monday?
Frezak (GM): SHould do.
Ganelon: Sure, though you'll want to ask the other two who aren't here, of course.
Frezak (GM): Or put them in a box.
Wen: (Monday works for me)
(well, anything works until the end of next week pretty much)
Apheori (GM): Let's aim for that, then, and see what we can do with the others.
Frezak (GM): boxes.
Ellemerr: Get going to where you find me! Never mind that I'll be gone again almost at once; we can have an awkward first introduction and then you'll be lucky enough to not see my gal for a while and it'll be swell! Yeah!
Apheori (GM): Ellemerr: It could take awhile. >.>
Ellemerr: ... I know.
Don't worry about it. I'll read and... do all the things I need to do.
Apheori (GM): Right.
Wen: same time on monday?
or different time?
Apheori (GM): Same, probably.
Wen: okay
...anything else? Otherwise I'm going to go console my poor stomach.
Apheori (GM): FOOOOOOD.
Wen: FOOOOOOD. 

Session 3

Wen: Hi team.
Apheori (GM): My sea of pdfs is inclined to drown.
Frezak (GM): Make a boat.
Ganelon: Hello.
Bear Soup Guy: Adobe Boat
Apheori (GM): Okay, where were we all?
Frezak (GM): I was digging a hole.
Wen: in the parking lot
SHIP is gone.
Frezak (GM): *SURPRISE*
Wen: that backstabbing bastard, I mean, er.
Frezak (GM): I was under the impression SHIP was more female than male.
Unless bastard is also genderless.
Apheori (GM): It is.
Wen: but usually male
Ganelon: It is, it's just very male-biased.
Wen: used as an insult, people tend to substitute bitch for females.
but I guess you could technically call a girl born out of wedlock a bastard.
Apheori (GM): Right.
GRAVY IS DIGGING UP A TREE.
Frezak (GM): Well, ship has buggered off.
Radek was about to try and see if he can report back?
Apheori (GM): RADEK IS CONSIDERING THE... OTHER SHIPS OR SOMETHING.
GREIBEL IS A MOOSE.
Bear Soup Guy: YAY MOOSE
Frezak (GM): MOOSE
Apheori (GM): RHU IS STARING AT GRAVY.
Ganelon: I want to go to that shipwreck, yes.
But right now I need... probably 10 minutes' time.
Wen: goddamn it people test your website on windows.
Apheori (GM): AZIR IS HAPPY TO BE OUTSIDE.
Wen: very much so yes.
Ganelon: As in, Radek does.
Not I.
Frezak (GM): Magic ritual time?
Ganelon: Damn straight.
Frezak (GM): MAGIC
MAKE HOLE.
Ganelon: To Make Whole.
Not to be confused with digging.
The Gravedigger: I CAN MAKE HOLES TOO, GUYS.
Apheori (GM): You're doing that already.
Frezak (GM): Without even using magic.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: Roll a d20.
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20
(
16
)
=
16
Apheori (GM): You can stop being a moose if you want.
Bear Soup Guy: Okie dokie
Apheori (GM): Everyone else, do stuff.
Aziraphale stares around wildly
Apheori (GM): Azir: d20
Aziraphale:
rolling 1d20
(
16
)
=
16
Apheori (GM): You're sane. Congratulations.
Ganelon: What I'm doing takes quite some time, but these fellows are welcome to watch as I draw circles around this broken sword.
Greibel: Oh man, I love broken sword magic!
Ganelon: Well, 10 minutes is quite some time compared to the length of a fight, anyway.
Or most discussions.
Frezak (GM): Brb, Assume I'm burying a swarm of undead chickens.
Rhu: Greibel, Azir: d20 again.
Aziraphale:
rolling 1d20
(
3
)
=
3
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
5
)
=
5
Rhu:
rolling 1d20
(
9
)
=
9
Wen: crap
Apheori (GM): Oops. Oh well.
Hmm.
I need to wake up.
Wen: /me drops a 2kg weight on Apheori
Apheori (GM): Oh, bugger, I guess Rhu was the only one who noticed.
Bear Soup Guy pulls the lever dropping a 16 ton weight on Apheori
Apheori (GM): So Rhu's just sort of staring.
Nevermind him, though.
So Azir and Greibel are watching the shiny artificer.
Gravy: YOU FINISH DIGGING UP THE TREE.
And then he probably just buries them.
Argh, I need... waking.
Frezak (GM): Burying dem birdies.
Apheori (GM): Okay, you're all busy and for some inane reasons nothing particularly weird is happening besides whatever Rhu was staring at, so I'ma get some tea.
Bear Soup Guy: They were zombies so you may need to bury them twice as deep
Frezak (GM): What is twice dead cannot rise again!
Or something.
Wen: I want a second monitor
Frezak (GM): I'll just pack the earth really tight.
You can't have mine.
i'm using it.
Wen: Damn it.
brb bathroom.
Bear Soup Guy: The bathroom probably has a second monitor
Frezak (GM): Like all good bathrooms.
Apheori (GM): I could use a fifth monitor.
Ganelon: I could use a monitor lizard.
Wen: Back.
Apheori (GM) feels like dropping a car on the parking lot.
Wen: I was actually considering going on campus to one of the labs and stealing the use of a monitor.
but noo, closed over the break.
Apheori (GM): >.<
GUYS.
Wen: HI.
Frezak (GM): HELLO.
Apheori (GM): There is a loud WHOMP from the other end of the lot.
Aziraphale: What was that noise?
Apheori (GM): Frezak: YOU DONE BURYING YET?
Greibel looks toward the WHOMP
Frezak (GM): YOU TELL ME.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: It looks messy.
FREZAK: YOU'RE DOING BURYING.
Frezak (GM): I'll turn and squint, using Gravy-vision.
Greibel: It's okay guys, it was just a WHOMP
Aziraphale: What kind of WHOMP?
Apheori (GM): A messy WHOMP.
Frezak (GM): Messy?
Apheori (GM): Maybe you should go and look.
Frezak (GM): Organic?
Apheori (GM): It sounded messy.
Frezak (GM): DID A FISH GO SPLAT?
Apheori (GM): Yes.
The Gravedigger: Flying fish!
TO THE FISH
Apheori (GM): It could have been a fish.
Frezak (GM): I will charge towards the sound.
Aziraphale walks cautiously toward the source of the noise
Apheori (GM): You go and investigate, and...
...well, something went splat.
Frezak (GM): GOSH.
Ganelon: When 10 minutes have transpired, let me know.
Rituals require me to stay in place and pay attention
Frezak (GM): So we see... globs?
Ganelon: Though as a player I'll always be here to offer snarky commentary, fear ye not.
Greibel: Hey Gravy, you ever bury globs?
Apheori (GM): There are globs.
The Gravedigger: Many globs.
But.
If there's something i've learnt.
It's that there are always new globs.
Apheori (GM): And some things that might be bone.
Frezak (GM): And I try Perception to identify the globs?
Greibel: What a nice thought
Frezak (GM): *can I try
Wen: does it look alive?
Frezak (GM): ZOMBIE GLOBS AAAAA
Apheori (GM): It's definitely not alive now.
ROLL.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+8
(
20
)
+8
=
28
EEEEEEAGLE EYES
I SEE ALL.
THE UNIVERSE UNFOLDS.
Wen: If it's another undead something battle I'm going to kill someone. >.>
Apheori (GM): You discern that it used to be a small dragon.
Bear Soup Guy: "I can see forever!"
Ganelon: You should be looking forward to fighting undead, what with the holy powers.
Apheori (GM): You also see some bits of metal.
The Gravedigger: That used to be a small dragon.
THere's also...
The Gravedigger rummages for the metal bits.
The Gravedigger: THIS.
Apheori (GM): You hold up a half-digested...
Light fixture.
Aziraphale: Does anyone know if there are supposed to be dragons in this place?
The Gravedigger: Well, that's odd.
YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO LIVE HERE.
WHY DONT YOU KNOW?
Greibel: Does it shine groovy colors?
Apheori (GM): Dragons are not native to Sarathi, but one of this size could have been kept as a pet.
Azir: You can't know everything about the entire planet.
Aziraphale: Gravy: I've never seen the, certainly.
Frezak (GM): Do dragons normally eat light fixtures?
Wen: WELL TELL THAT TO GRAVY EH
Apheori (GM): YOU TELL IT TO HIM. I'm just leaving a note.
Wen: them*
well okay I just did
Apheori (GM): GOOD.
Frezak (GM): ALRIGHT.
Bear Soup Guy: I wish I could do real life perception rolls
Apheori (GM): And I dunno, do dragons normally eat light fixtures?
Also it's starting to glow.
Frezak (GM): They're your dragons.
Apheori (GM): GAN: YOUR GUY FINISHES.
Frezak (GM): What's glowing?
The globs or the metal?
Apheori (GM): The light fixture.
Oh, wait.
Ganelon: Marvelous, let's see what all the hubbub is about.
Apheori (GM): The globs are too now.
Frezak (GM): I WILL DROP THE LIGHT FIXTURES.
And double-move back.
Greibel: This is like the world's most disorganized lava lamp
The Gravedigger: DO dragons normally glow?
Aziraphale mutters something
Radek: Dragons?
Aziraphale is really muttering now
The Gravedigger: Dead glowy dragon here.
Aziraphale: babble babble babble
The Gravedigger: WHAT ARE YOU SAYING AZI?
Apheori (GM): Radek: Only certain kinds do, and they wouldn't be this small.
Frezak (GM): 18 con lungs.
Greibel: I presume this dragon was owned by Zombie Timothy Leary
Aziraphale: something something Alesvrie something
The Gravedigger: STOP MUMBLING.
Aziraphale shuffles his feet uncomfortably
The Gravedigger pokes Aziraphale.
Aziraphale: I think I might know where the dragons might have come from.
The Gravedigger: Awesome!
Apheori (GM): Greibel: d20
Aziraphale: This is just a shot in the dark... but well, the truth is that I was taking part in an experiment, and then when I left the double insulated lab, everyone was just gone.
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
8
)
=
8
The Gravedigger: What.
Were you mucking about with SCIENCE?
Gaaaaah.
RADEEEEEK
Radek: Don't you even start.
Aziraphale: Not me. My employer was.
Radek: What was the experiment?
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You see the sky.
Greibel: Lava lamps, I bet
Aziraphale: Something about summoning creatures from different planes of existence, or possibly just make creatures that existed in different dimensions real? I didn't really understand the details.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: It looks horribly wrong.
(From Aziraphale): sorry, quicker just to paste what you gave me >.>
Greibel: Woooah
Apheori (GM): Greibel: Like a lava lamp.
Greibel: A HUNGRY ONE.
(To Aziraphale): No worries.
Greibel: Guys look at the sky!
Aziraphale looks
Apheori (GM): Azir: d20
Greibel: That's the most dangerous looking light up goo I've ever seen!
Frezak (GM): Gravy looks as well.
Wen: do I add insight or something?
Ganelon: I'll look.
Apheori (GM): Gravy: d20
Frezak (GM): MADNESS
17
Ganelon: It would be stupid not to.
Apheori (GM): d20!
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
17
)
=
17
Apheori (GM): Wen: I'll add the relevant thingy here.
Aziraphale:
rolling 1d20
(
14
)
=
14
Apheori (GM): The sky seems to be the wrong colour.
And the light is going the wrong direction.
And there are cracks.
But none of you see anything resembling a hungry lava lamp effect.
The Gravedigger: Well that's queer.
Apheori (GM): Greibel does.
Greibel: I quite agree, Horseman
Rhu: It's glowing. Mutating.
Aziraphale: So, dead dragons, half digested light fixtures, the sky having diarrhoea...
What's next?
The Gravedigger: UNdead chickens?
No, wait, we did that.
BIg piles of money?
Rhu: More?
Aziraphale: I sincerely hope not.
That'd be nice.
The Gravedigger: Sandwiches?
Aziraphale: A ship that works would be nicer.
The Gravedigger: Eventually there won't be any bad things.
Aziraphale: I just want to get the hell out of this place now.
Bad things never run out.
It's the way of things.
Aziraphale mutters darkly
Greibel: Nonsense
Rhu: There is a pile of money over here, actually.
Greibel: After the planet has been fully digested and there's nothing left to feel
Rhu points.
Radek: I don't know what your employers thought they were doing, Aziraphale, but they sound like a bunch of amateurs and this was probably their fault too.
Greibel: There will be no bad things :D
The Gravedigger: Yeah, listen to the drugged madman.
What?
Money?
Aziraphale approaches the pile of money cautiously
The Gravedigger peers in the pointed direction.
Apheori (GM): It looks like a pile of money.
Aziraphale pokes it with his borrowed shovel
Apheori (GM): It's a pile of money. You're not sure the currency, but it would probably sell for a lot.
Aziraphale: Radek, can I have my sword back?
The Gravedigger: Careful with that.
It's an antique.
Radek: Of course. You will notice that it is in most excellent shape once again.
Aziraphale: Mucha gracias.
Does anyone object if I keep the money?
As in, keep it with me.
The Gravedigger shrugs.
The Gravedigger: I'm here to bury things.
Greibel shrugs too
Greibel: I'm here to...why am I here anyway?
Ganelon: Is it a pile that could even be carried?
Aziraphale: Gravy, thanks for the shovel, you can have it back now
The Gravedigger: You're welcome.
Radek sighs at Greibel's remark.
Frezak (GM): SHOVEL GET.
Wen: Hee.
Apheori (GM): He has a bag, but it'd probably be easier to dump it on the gravedigger or split it.
Frezak (GM): What form is the money IN?
Wen: that large a pile?
WE'RE RICH!
Frezak (GM): I'd have thought future money was digital.
Apheori (GM): It's... not huge, but enough to be inconvenient.
IT is.
Aziraphale: Okay, what about we split it?
eggs in more than one basket and all that.
Apheori (GM): You'll need to fence it for it to have real value.
Greibel: Lucky it didn't get all wet from the dragon globs
Radek: Sensible, though I can't see what good it will do us while we're here.
Aziraphale: Well, let's split it anyway
Ganelon: Oh yeah, is the dragon still glowing?
Aziraphale pockets 1/5
Frezak (GM): brb
Apheori (GM): The dragon is still glowing.
It looks like some sort of (al)chemical reaction.
Ganelon: I am highly intrigued but not foolish enough to assume it's safe.
Bear Soup Guy: Can I inspect the dragon with my NATURE?
Apheori (GM): Do it.
Greibel: okay
rolling 1d20 + 11
(
20
)
+11
=
31
Apheori (GM): Azir: It looks like the others aren't interested in the pile of money.
Wen: \o/
Bear Soup Guy: SUPER NATURE
Ganelon: I'm interested enough to take my share.
Bear Soup Guy: I AM ONE WITH THE FOREST
Ganelon: I just need to know how much that is.
Apheori (GM): Agh, dammit.
Gan: It's a small pile.
As opposed to a regular pile.
>.>
Ganelon: ...
Apheori (GM): Okay, it's about 3lbs of shiny stuff.
Wen: Can we just assume everyone takes some and move on? It's not critical to the plot right now is it?
Ganelon: You know, this is a game with a universal system of value.
But yes, it's hardly a big deal.
Apheori (GM): This is a universe that doesn't have a universal system of value, though.
Okay, fine, it's... how much would 3lb of shiny stuff be worth?
Like... coins.
Wen: OH LOOK A TRAVELEX. wait no everyone else is _dead_ on this planet. >_>
Ganelon: I don't know! Coins are somehow weightless in D&D!
Wen: snrk.
Apheori (GM): ...okay, how much SPACE do they take up?
Ganelon: NONE!
Bear Soup Guy: FIVE HUNDRED COINS
Ganelon: That's actually a whole lot, but whatever. This isn't worth raising a fuss over.
Apheori (GM): Meh, it's probably about that.
Wen: okay, so everyone takes 100?
Apheori (GM): Because you know what? THAT WOULD PROBABLY BE ABOUT HOW HEAVY IT IS.
I guess.
Wen: you can make it Zimbabwe dollars later if you think it's too much.
Bear Soup Guy: heh heh
Apheori (GM): You have no idea what it is.
Ganelon: Okay, I want to hear about Greibel's astonishing success.
Apheori (GM): They look like dwemer coins, but everyone knows that's just an ancient videogame.
GREIBEL:
Uh...
Hold on, I need to make something up.
Bear Soup Guy: I AM A FLOWER AND THE UNIVERSE AND ALL OF YOU
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You see the universe glowing in the dragon.
It's like... everything, scaled down and splattered.
Ganelon: I am old and cranky and hoping I can extract something flammable, acidic, or explosive from this dragon's corpse.
Apheori (GM): Also it used to be a dreloth. They're wimpy and a lot of people keep them as pets, especially in the Artiilie empire.
You get this urge to try smoking it.
Greibel: It was definitely a pet Dreloth!
Radek: Why is it glowing?
Greibel takes out a wooden pipe
Greibel: I'm going to find out!
Aziraphale: Um, are we sure this is a good idea?
Greibel puts some goop in the pipe and smokes it?
Aziraphale: I'm pretty sure it isn't.
Radek: That hasn't stopped him before.
Rhu: Meh.
Greibel: I've seen the beginning and ending of the universe, I know what I'm doi- WOOOOAHHHH
Frezak (GM): D&D coins aren't weightless >.>
Rhu: This is probably why we brought him.
The Gravedigger: Smoking expertise?
I thought we were just the only people that would come here.
Radek: (Shouting) Does it seem particularly volatile from over there?
Apheori (GM): Griebel: d20
Rhu: ...or that.
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
6
)
=
6
It seems volatily delicious!
Frezak (GM): I'll edge away in case he explodes.
Or melts.
Or glows.
Or turns into a swarm of pigmy moose.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You get reasonably high as a result.
Frezak (GM): Reasonably?
Apheori (GM): No pygmy moose.
Reasonably.
Frezak (GM): IN THIS PLACE?
THERE IS NO REASON.
Apheori (GM): Pfft.
Ganelon: It stands to reason that he is high.
Greibel: Mmmm
Well, it doesn't seem dangerous
Frezak (GM): What does it smell like?
Radek: Not dangerous? Hah. You just don't know where to look.
Apheori (GM): It smells like a strong base.
Greibel: It smells like old milk
No
Frezak (GM): A strong base?
What does that mean?
Greibel: FRESH milk
Frezak (GM): LIke... chalk?
Aziraphale: Ammonia?
Apheori (GM): Opposite of an acid. Like it was dunked in it, splattered, and then started reacting.
Greibel: Milky chalk
Apheori (GM): WEIRDLY.
Frezak (GM): Forget it. Stupid question. My sense of smell is fucked.
>.>
SO it doesn't smell delicious.
Apheori (GM): What happened to your sense of smell?
Ganelon: Well, if he's talking about Gravy, the guy did just spend almost 10 minutes hauling around rotting chicken corpses.
Apheori (GM): ...point.
Frezak (GM): I meant mine.
I don't really have one.
JUST IGNORE IT.
Apheori (GM): Ah.
Frezak (GM): AND DO THINGS.
Apheori (GM): OKAY.
Rhu does things.
Ganelon: Radek will approach and attempt to dig around this dragon's corpse.
Greibel will stand there looking all high and pointing vaguely while chuckling
Ganelon: It's pretty much totally up to you what he finds.
But... substances is the goal.
Frezak (GM): LET ME DIG.
I will offer Radek my second-best shovel.
Apheori (GM): You find substances.
Ganelon: And NOT NARCOTIC ONES.
Apheori (GM): I'm not sure what.
Ganelon: Just give me another arbitrary number like you did with the computer parts.
Bear Soup Guy: I'm sure he could reverse engineer narcotic ones or....something
Apheori (GM): I was hoping the gm guide would be of help, but...
All the pages are blank?
120
Ganelon: Thank you.
Apheori (GM): But some of that is narcotics.
So be careful.
Especially of Greibel.
Frezak (GM): He's dangerous.
Rhu pockets the light fixture.
Ganelon: I personally know very little about what materials are actually required for D&D alchemy, because everything is listed with a cost measured in money rather than... stuff.
Apheori (GM): Whereas I know nothing about costs, but I might know a thing or two about stuff... >.>
Silly D&D.
Frezak (GM): I'll go poke the busted ships for glowy cells.
Ganelon: Like, making a jar of Alchemist's Fire/Acid costs me the equivalent of 25 gold coins, but in materials that are worth nothing else on their own.
Wen: wait, there's a busted ship?
Apheori (GM): You're in a parking lot.
Ganelon: We saw it on the way down.
Apheori (GM): It has a few.
Wen: Ah
Apheori (GM): There was also one in the ocean, but that's further away.
Wen: Do we try to explore any of them?
Apheori (GM): These are generally little car and boat things. But yeah, you might as well check them out.
The one Gravy pokes falls to pieces, though.
Wen: No spaceships?
Apheori (GM): Like it just sort of disintigrated.
Wen: aw.
Apheori (GM): A lot of them are spaceships, but not... bbig ones.
Aziraphale: Illusions? Or was it concrete before you touched it?
Ganelon: I'm not going to relentlessly salvage *everything* we come across, no worries.
Apheori (GM): There
Frezak (GM): Into dust?
Apheori (GM): 's a pile of spaceship dust now.
Frezak (GM): I WILL POKE ALL THE SHIPS.
Aziraphale: Wait!
Was the concreteness an illusion?
Apheori (GM): A couple of others also fall into dust, a few just dent, and the others are quite solid.
You also notice small holes in quite a few of them.
Greibel: Nice poking, Horseman!
Frezak (GM): Neat or torn holes?
Apheori (GM): And a much larger hole in the ground where one... used to be.
Some of both.
Some chopped out, some punched.
Bear Soup Guy: brb bathroom
Frezak (GM): From in or out?
Ganelon: I take it there's not much of a consistent pattern beyond them being damaged.
Aziraphale: I suggest we explore one of the solid ships and see what we can find.
The Gravedigger: TIME!
Apheori (GM): Generally punched in.
The Gravedigger: Some of these have been aged.
Apheori (GM): But not always.
The Gravedigger: I DONT WANT TO TURN INTO AN OLD MAN.
Radek: You could just as easily turn into a simpering child, you know.
The Gravedigger: That would be great.
I'd have more years left to dig holes.
Radek: Not for the rest of us.
Apheori (GM): Two things:
1, I fell sick.
Wen: >.<
Apheori (GM): 2, Azir, if you can get them open, they're generally no bigger than SUVs.
So it shouldn't take long to search them.
A few are open-topped skiffs as well.
Ganelon: Radek experiences a sudden epiphany about the Gravedigger's childhood experience.
Frezak (GM): Can we check the insides for remains of whatever punched the holes? Bolts, arrows, bulletheads?
Ganelon: He was likely the king of the sandbox.
Apheori (GM): Frezak: Find an open-topped one or get a door open.
Aziraphale: Let's look at the open topped ones first..
Apheori (GM): Gan: Snrk.
Frezak (GM): What Azi said.
Ganelon: Like a convertible?
Apheori (GM): Basically.
You find one full of peas.
There appear to be some bones in it.
Radek: ...I used to love peas.
Wen: Before The Incident
Frezak (GM): what kind of bones?
Peas, before the Change.
Apheori (GM): Some kind of small animal. Maybe a dog?
You can fish them out to try to see.
Bear Soup Guy: Fishing in a sea of peas
Ganelon: Sounds like the job for some kind of experienced digger.
Frezak (GM): I RISE TO THE TASK.
Nature/perception?
Apheori (GM): Just dig.
Frezak (GM): i delve.
Apheori (GM): You find more bones! Several... not dogs.
Giant chickens!
Also there's a large gun and a bucket of paint in the bottom.
Frezak (GM): What size compared to the undead chickens?
Greibel: Mercenary artists!
Frezak (GM): More on the gun.
Apheori (GM): Much bigger.
Frezak (GM): Colour of paint.
Apheori (GM): Purple paint.
The gun is a blastive one. Probably used to blow stuff up at reasonable range, but not very good accuracy.
(I guess it shoots fireballs.)
Frezak (GM): Like some kind of siege weapon?
Wen: do we find signs of the original occupants?
Apheori (GM): Potentially, but probably not that strong. It's like a sceptre of fireballs.
Frezak (GM): Is it functional?
Apheori (GM): No sign of them.
Frezak (GM): As far as I can tell without using it?
Apheori (GM): It doesn't give any indications of not being functional.
Frezak (GM): Actually.
Apheori (GM): The on switch responds.
Frezak (GM): I'll hand it to Radek.
He knows science.
Ganelon: I do!
Is any part of this weapon clogged with peas?
Frezak (GM): You are taunted by peas.
SHIT.
THE PEAS.
Ganelon: (I turn it off before inspecting the barrel)
Frezak (GM): ARE THE FANGED?
Apheori (GM): Radek: You recognise the make. It's basically a toy, though one with considerable destructive potential (at least for a toy). Once you get the peas off the display, you find it says it's about half full.
Frezak (GM): *thry
*they
Apheori (GM): They are not fanged.
Radek: I remember these things.
Frezak (GM): What kind of skill would be required to manipulate this device at maximum effectiveness?
Apheori (GM): The gun? The ability to point it.
Radek: One of the least safe devices ever marketed to children, as I recall.
Well, it was safe enough to the children themselves.
Aziraphale: How many deaths?
before it was pulled
...it was pulled, yes?
The Gravedigger: Dibs.
Rhu: Nope.
Aziraphale: ...You can have the gun. I'll keep my sword.
The Gravedigger: Awesome!
Greibel scoffs at the gun
Radek: Go ahead. I already have a precision firing instrument.
Apheori (GM): Azir: Less deaths than the do-it-yourself vampiric veggie chemistry set.
Frezak (GM): Gravy is the happiest man on the planet.
Radek: Mind the property damage, though. Or... well, don't, because it's nobody's property anymore.
Wen: /me giggles
Frezak (GM): THE SQUASH.
Radek: It's half full.
Frezak (GM): How many shots is 'half-full' ?
ish?
Wen: Okay, so our options: explore more vehicles, explore the dragon / light fixture mess, go elsewhere. What else?
Apheori (GM): 10-20.
Ganelon: Batteries sold separately, no doubt.
Apheori (GM): There are some other buildings.
Aziraphale: Radek: Do you think you can try contacting the outside world?
Ganelon: Are communications back?
Apheori (GM): Should be rechargable, but... yeah.
Gan: No.
When you check, you can't connect to anything.
Radek: Not with any measure of success. Communications are all dead.
Frezak (GM): He could check the video logs we pulled earlier?
Aziraphale: Damn.
Good idea.
Ganelon: That he could!
Frezak (GM): I AM SO SMART.
GO DO SCIENCE.
Gravy will go back to poking random things to see what turns to dust.
Ganelon: Gather 'round and let's see.
That also works.
Frezak (GM): Eh, science.
I'll let you handle it.
I trust you to tell me cool things.
Apheori (GM): One of the things explodes on Gravy, coating him in dust.
Greibel is torn between watching the science or watching the ships turn to dust
Frezak (GM): WHOOOO
Apheori (GM): Greibel, Gravy: d20s.
Frezak (GM): I'll run in circle and have dust trail behind me like a cloak.
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
11
)
=
11
Ganelon: Oh gods, what kind of dust was this?
Frezak (GM): MADNESS
4
Nooooo
My sanity!
Apheori (GM): Gan: Your guy starts going through the logs, leaving the connection in the background. It all looks pretty normal.
Ganelon: Just ordinary mall stuff?
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You turn and see the peas rising off the ground where Gravy left them.
They appear to have sprouted fangs.
Gravy: The dust causes you to sneeze a bit.
Wen: do we see the fangs?
The Gravedigger: ACHOOOO
Greibel: AH FANGED PEAS
Ganelon: GaaaaaAAAAAH THIS IS WHY WE DON'T GIVE THE GM IDEAS
Apheori (GM): Gan: Yup. Day to tay stuff, until about a week ago.
Frezak (GM): I didn't, Gan.
Apheori (GM): Wen: No.
Frezak (GM): She came up with them first.
Aziraphale eyes Greibel
Aziraphale: are you okay?
The Gravedigger: Oh, be quiet Greibel.
I'M THE KING OF DUST
Apheori (GM): Gan: d20.
Greibel: OF COURSE I'M NOT OKAY, I'M SUPER HIGH AND THERE ARE FANGED PEAS OVER THERE
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
3
)
=
3
The Gravedigger runs around in circles some more.
Wen: uh oh
Greibel: Actually sometimes that would be quite okay
The Gravedigger: DUSSSSST
Greibel: I guess it's not so bad until they attack
The Gravedigger picks up Greibel and runs around carrying the druid over his head like an airplane.
The Gravedigger: WHOOOO
Greibel: WOOOOOOO DUST PLANE
Apheori (GM): Gan: You realise there are jumps in the recordings, like what was recorded is randomly changing, or there are holes in it, except the lighting doesn't change.
Aziraphale: Radek, I think Gravy is going insane.
The Gravedigger: I AM DESTROYER OF SHIPS
Radek: I don't have a cure for that.
Greibel makes laser gun noises with his mouth
(To Frezak): You know, your character actually passed the sanity check. Not that this isn't hilarious.
Radek: There's something wrong with the footage here. It keeps jumping.
(From Frezak (GM)): I know! he's just having fun.
The Gravedigger jumps with Greibel.
Aziraphale: anything different about what's actually recorded aside from the technical anomalies?
(To Frezak): Heh. Though he also might be high.
Apheori (GM): Radek: Another d20
Ganelon: Is there a timer to indicated skips in time or is the environment itself skipping?
rolling 1d20
(
7
)
=
7
Apheori (GM): Stop rolling badly.
The Gravedigger puts Greibel down to see what Radek is doing.
Wen: XD
Ganelon: If only I could.
Frezak (GM): He can't. It's the currrrse
Greibel wipes the dust off himself
Ganelon: You should've seen how lucky I was yesterday with the gnoll.
Goblins at my back, orcs everywhere else - even in my hands - and they just couldn't hit me.
Apheori (GM): Well, anyway, you turn on timestamps, and they mostly hold up throughout the jumps (though there are a few holes as well).
Aziraphale: So there appear to be gaps in action that are not accounted for in time.
Odd.
Apheori (GM): You also notice the plants and other decor seems to change between jumps.
Radek: No less odd than what we experienced inside the building ourselves.
Greibel: Stair fish...
Wen: Anything actually unusual within the clips? Fanged hams? Twisting walls? People growing appendages they shouldn't?
Greibel nods in agreement
Apheori (GM): He hasn't actually gotten to the past week yet.
Frezak (GM): Cripes.
Apheori (GM): When all of this started.
So... no.
Aziraphale: Radek: Might want to skip to the more recent stuff and search back
Radek: Certainly.
Apheori (GM): Recent stuff: Empty rooms. A floor waving tentacles. Some zombies wandering a corridor. What looks like several solid hours of Azir staring down a floating fish in abject horror. Sunlight that's turned red. Everything is red.
Frezak (GM): I'll go look for another bit of clear dirt.
Apheori (GM): Everything is blue. Everything is black.
More empty rooms.
Wen: Do I remember staring down a floating fish?
Apheori (GM): No.
Aziraphale: Odd. I don't recall myself doing that.
Apheori (GM): That girl with the strange eyes walking the halls as though searching for something.
Greibel: Hey, I saw her!
Apheori (GM): More empty rooms. Walls rippling.
Holes openening.
Static.
Wen: Jumps?
man, why is the weather always so nice when I'm playing D&D? >.>
Apheori (GM): Less jumps, just a lot of different cameras. He's just searching through them.
Radek: I would be hesitant to say that this was any more or less real than what we did ourselves, but...
Well, it should make for a good report if we can ever find a way to send the bloody thing back home.
The Gravedigger: Find a communications tower?
Aziraphale: Radek, can you check out footage of the control core and see if there was anyone there before us?
The Gravedigger: POwer it up, ping a sattelite?
Apheori (GM): For some reason the light seems wrong in a lot of them - often too red, sometimes too blue. Like the colours shifted.
The control core had fairly normal activity (but jumps) up until it had no activity.
Then there was just nothing.
A large fish taking up most of the space.
Nothing.
A group of humans in fashion attire looking lost and confused, eating doughnuts.
Apheori (GM): Nothing.
Aziraphale: Hmm... That's odd
Is the footage of us accurate?
The Gravedigger: I better not have a beetle on my back.
Apheori (GM): You see yourself bending your sword of of shape, and such. Yeah, mostly accurate, but according to the footage only you and Gravy actually entered.
And then you left almost immediately.
Radek: Well, that can't be right...
The Gravedigger: YOU'RE ALL GHOSTS.
Aziraphale: No, it can't.
The Gravedigger: MAYBE.
Apheori (GM): You're not sure what you're watching after that.
Greibel: What if you're the ghost?
Apheori (GM): Because Radek took what was there at the time, not what was there... after.
Aziraphale: but it keeps playing?
Apheori (GM): Yes.
It's oddly blue, however.
Aziraphale: I wonder. With all the wrong footage and colour shifts.
Radek, what do you know about dimensions and parallel universes?
Might as well throw this out here... If the experiment _was_ related to what happened...
Greibel: Oh man, this sounds groovy
The Gravedigger: You said they were bringing things here from another dimesion.
THe thing is just working backwards.
Taking things from here to there.
Radek: I know that they're best left not tampered with.
The Gravedigger: WE'RE GONNA GET TO SEE DRAGONS!
Rhu: You've never been to a zoo?
The Gravedigger: No?
Rhu: I am so sorry.
The Gravedigger: THey don't let you dig holes in zoos.
Rhu: What was the experiment doing? Tampering?
rolling d20
(
8
)
=
8
Apheori (GM): Griebel: d20
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
8
)
=
8
The Gravedigger: Mucking about with science.
Aziraphale: I'm not sure.
I was only supposed to guard the place.. in case anything appeared.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You get this intense interest in paint.
Aziraphale: Nothing appeared at the time.
Greibel: Horseman, did you keep that can of paint?
Ganelon: This had better not be to sniff paint fumes.
Rhu: Did the shielding fail?
That's what shielding is for, right?
Greibel: Pah! I stopped sniffing paint weeks ago!
Rhu: Radek, you'd know more about this.
The Gravedigger: It's still in the ship.
Ganelon: Shielding?
Aziraphale: I wouldn't know. The experiment looked like it went as it should have from the inside
Greibel goes to the ship with the fanged peas and the paint can
Aziraphale: and then when we went outside everyone was just gone.
The Gravedigger follows Greibel.
Greibel: Look at that! Isn't that shade of purple just beautiful?
Ganelon: Please explain, miss GM.
About shielding.
Apheori (GM): They were messing with dimensional stuff, so the room was shielded.
Ganelon: And what I should know.
Apheori (GM): So that if it did go wrong, it would be kept inside.
You'd probably know the theory, at least.
That... uh...
Ganelon: Well, he's asking mostly about the consequences.
Frezak (GM): So it got inverted.
Apheori (GM): Right, that could have happened, but all the science says that's impossible, that's exactly what the shielding would prevent.
Unless something else happened that was a lot bigger.
Aziraphale: so the guy I was supposed to be helping panicked after we went outside
Ganelon: There actually is a path for artificers to specialize in portals and stuff, I'm just not taking it. Radek is no paragon of dimensional science.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: d20
Ganelon: But he could still know that easily enough.
Apheori (GM): Gan: Doesn't need to be a paragon of it. He's at least heard of it.
Aziraphale: he mentioned something about inverting reality and placing us in another set of dimensions
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20
(
4
)
=
4
Aziraphale: and that if it happened it would have destabilised outside of the range, or something.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You grab the can of paint and start hugging it like it's your favourite ever.
Greibel: I LOVE THIS PAINT
I've never felt this way about paint that wasn't getting me high!
Frezak (GM): I will stand and look dubiously down at him.
Wen: I will go to the bathroom. brb.
Greibel takes some out and splashes it around a bit
Radek: It isn't like I was there, Rhu. Yes, in theory, this is why people apply dimensional shielding before conducting such experiments.
And it should be impossible, if they did it right, for something to go wrong outside of the shielded area.
Frezak (GM): I'll go loot more ships.
Radek: Much less... this wrong.
Rhu: Maybe the shielding exploded.
Maybe... what... is he doing?
Rhu stares at Greibel.
Greibel prances about gleefully with the paint can
The Gravedigger: being a stoner.
Radek: I try to ignore him but it just... never works.
Greibel sits on the asphalt with the paint can overturned on his head, paint dripping down himself
Rhu: Frezak: You find some random stuff: keys, tools, fertiliser, some snacks, a little figurine of Evisdra Irindri, some tape, a book of riddles, some small computers, and a really shiny cloak.
Apheori (GM): Oops.
Well, anyway, you find that.
Ganelon: Ooh, riddles.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: d20
Azir: d20
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
17
)
=
17
Ganelon: And computers.
Smart things.
Frezak (GM): CLOAK.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You realise that because of the paint can on your head, you can't see or breathe, so you pull it off. You're a bit confused as to why you did that, but only a little bit.
Greibel does that
Frezak (GM): I put it around my neck like a poncho.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 for Azir because he's out.
(
6
)
=
6
Greibel: Heeeey, nice cape, man
Apheori (GM): It makes you feel kind of fuzzy.
Greibel: Real Vincent Price
Aziraphale:
rolling 1d20
(
1
)
=
1
...
Apheori (GM): I'm totally going with that.
Wen: /me smashes the die
Ganelon: Yaaaay
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Frezak (GM): WHOOO
Ganelon: Sometimes rolls of 1 can be very amusing and appropriate.
Apheori (GM): Azir: YOU SEE TENTACLES EVERYWHERE.
Ganelon: Other times, Korik dies.
Aziraphale: AAAAAAGH
TENTACLES EVERYWHERE
Greibel: Whoa, WHERE?
Frezak (GM): I put the shiny cloak over his head.
Greibel: Tentacles are AWESOME
Aziraphale: EVERYWHERE
Apheori (GM): Greibel: d20
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
17
)
=
17
Aziraphale: mmmmf mmfff MMUFF.
Apheori (GM): Aww.
The Gravedigger: Shhhhhh.
They're gone.
Wen: is it just me or does the stoner average much better rolls?
Greibel pats Azi reassuringly
Apheori (GM): Azir: You feel much calmer, and realise you were freaking out over nothing. Even if the tentacles are real, they weren't hurting anyone.
Greibel: Don't worry bro, just ride it out
Frezak (GM): I'll take the thing off when he stops struggling.
Ganelon: Yeah, he does seem to roll really well.
Aziraphale stops struggling
Apheori (GM): Well is relative. >.>
Azir: d20
Ganelon: Meanwhile, Gravy has been trending towards good sanity.
Wen: if I get a one again..
Ganelon: And I think I've been the opposite.
Aziraphale:
rolling 1d20
(
20
)
=
20
Wen: \o/
Bear Soup Guy: ahahah such disparity
Ganelon: A lot of shitty d20s but good SCIENCE ROLLS.
Apheori (GM): Gravy also has a much higher base sanity than most of the others. Radek too.
Ganelon: I wasn't even aware this was a stat.
Frezak (GM): I do?
Apheori (GM): Oh. I shouldn't have told you that.
Wen: me neither. I've not really been playing insane.
Frezak (GM): okay >.>
Ganelon: But it would make sense for Gravy to be more...
Apheori (GM): ANYWAY MOVING ON.
Ganelon: ...
Frezak (GM): Well I sort of guessed.
Ganelon: Down to earth.
Wen: Snrk.
Apheori (GM): You don't have to be insane to sometimes lose it.
Ganelon grins.
Wen: well what did my 20 earn me?
Apheori (GM): Oh, right.
Gravy pulls off the cloak. You still see the tentacles, but realise they're not actually there. Greibel seems to be their king.
Then you shake your head and it all goes back to normal, or as normal as things ever were.
Wen: excellent.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: d20
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
7
)
=
7
The Gravedigger: It's like dealing with children.
SO, where do we go now?
Apheori (GM): Gravy: d20
The Gravedigger: MADNESS
10
Apheori (GM): Also these aren't all sanity checks. Sometimes I'm making you roll other things and just not telling you. I hope you don't mind.
The Gravedigger: THe old lab or try to send a report back?
Apheori (GM): What was Radek doing? Radek was doing things.
Wen: I'm pretty sure I escaped all the input properly. >.>
Aziraphale: I don't want to go back to that building.
Wen: would there be anything useful in the shielded room where the experiment was done?
Ganelon: I was just looking at footage on this computer.
Apheori (GM): Wen: Maybe. You wouldn't necessarily know the difference. There was certainly... stuff.
Gan: d20
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
15
)
=
15
Oh hey, it was above 10 this time.
Apheori (GM): You also find the invisible shop that is there but isn't. The footage from outside shows it missing. The footage inside shows it there, as well as an amusing incident with pigeons.
It's full of fallen leaves.
Bear Soup Guy: =D
Ganelon: Now I've solved the mystery of "what Greibel did for like a minute without supervision."
My initial hypothesis of "it was something pretty silly" has no doubt been confirmed.
Apheori (GM): Snrk.
Ganelon: I'm ready to move on.
Frezak (GM): I think we're learning that our perception means NOTHING.
So, comm tower, then?
Unless anyone has a better idea?
Apheori (GM): Your perception checks mean something.
Aziraphale: Sure, let's go to the comm tower.
Frezak (GM): But we have no idea whether anything we see is real, or what level of reality we're talking about.
Apheori (GM): From the map, it looks like that's in the building opposite the one you went to before.
Frezak (GM): Awesome.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: LAVA LAMP SKY.
...this is a friendly reminder from your dm that it looks totally awesome.
Bear Soup Guy: =D
Greibel stares absently at the lava lamp sky
Wen: what can we do about it though
Aziraphale looks where Greibel is looking
Apheori (GM): Azir: The cracks are still there. The light is still wrong. It makes you kind of ill.
Aziraphale stops looking, shrugs
Apheori (GM): Greibel: d20
Everyone: You head for the building, I suppose.
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
9
)
=
9
Apheori (GM): Okay, you all head for the building, but there's a large chunk of metal blocking the steps up to the door.
Aziraphale: Radek: Would the toy gun be able to blast through that?
Frezak (GM): TIME TO FIND OUT.
Aziraphale: ...crap. the DM left.
oh nm
Apheori (GM): Chromium crashed.
So you want to try blasting it?
Aziraphale: Let's examine it first, I think
Frezak (GM): Yeah.
See if our manly muscles can dislodge it.
Or if we can walk through it >.>
Greibel: If we try enough, we probably can walk through it
Greibel stares at Gravy unsettlingly
Greibel: The universe is changing...
Rhu walks through it.
Frezak (GM): SEE?
Radek: I could make a bomb if it were really necessary.
Rhu: Yep.
Frezak (GM): I'll try, but CAREFULLY.
Don't want to run into a physical barrier.
Unlesss....
Apheori (GM): Gravy tries to walk through it but finds it solid.
Frezak (GM): It's only mad people that can go trhough it.
I'M TOO SANE.
aaaaaaaaa
Aziraphale: let's all try?
Apheori (GM): Everyone: Rolld20.
Frezak (GM): MADNESS
15
Aziraphale:
rolling 1d20
(
13
)
=
13
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
9
)
=
9
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
10
)
=
10
Apheori (GM): Greibel makes it. The rest of you don't.
SANE PEOPLE.
Apheori (GM) points and laughs.
Radek grumbles to himself.
Frezak (GM): Hag.
Greibel: ARE DRUGS BAD NOW, DUDES?
Frezak (GM): I'd like to see if I can muscle it.
Aziraphale: what's the block like?
Radek: I'm not getting paid enough to fix an entire dimension.
Apheori (GM): A twisted lump of thick metal.
Aziraphale: does it look like it can be blasted through?
Apheori (GM): It looks like it was blasted through and that's how it got here... but it also looks like it was specifically designed to resist such things.
Gravy: d20.
Frezak (GM): MADNESS
19
Apheori (GM): Well, that's boring.
You try to move it and nothing happens.
Frezak (GM): Huh.
Aziraphale tries to talk to it
Apheori (GM): Azir: d20
Aziraphale:
rolling 1d20
(
2
)
=
2
Apheori (GM): Talk to it.
Aziraphale: Hey block of metal, would you kindly move aside so we can pass?
...I have candy!
Block of metal: Hey, sexy.
Greibel: That's the spirit, holy brother
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Block of metal: What kind of candy?
Aziraphale: King-sized Snickers.
Block of metal: Oooo, you are a babe.
Aziraphale: you can have it if you let us pass!
Block of metal: Come on, come through. Enter me, sexy.
Wen: gods XD
Frezak (GM): NO.
Apheori (GM): *shifty eyes*
Frezak (GM): I WILL MAKE A HOLE IN THIS METAL.
Bear Soup Guy: XD XD XD
Frezak (GM): I'm gonna blast a crater with my weapon.
Aziraphale: This isn't the first wall that talked to me..
Apheori (GM): Frezak: d20
Aziraphale: I reckon we might as well give this a try.
Wen: aw.
Frezak (GM): I'm assuming we didn't hear the metal talk back?
Apheori (GM): Right.
Frezak (GM): Well', I start picking people up and putting them down further away.
Apheori (GM): Azir: You walk into the wall.
chunk.
Thing.
Frezak (GM): Wait.
So that's just me and Radek, now?
Apheori (GM): As you pass through, it makes strange squelching noises.
Frezak (GM): EW
Apheori (GM): You feel rather dirty.
Frezak (GM): SOiled.
Apheori (GM): Frezak: You can see the others on the other side, higher up on the steps.
But yes.
Wen: she does this on purpose >.>
Apheori (GM): >.>
Bear Soup Guy: =D
The Gravedigger: MOve aside, crazy people!
IT'S TIME FOR HOLE SCIENCE
Apheori (GM): The universe hates paladins. Any opportunity to mess with the paladin!
Aziraphale: well, let's get out of the way.
Frezak (GM): FIRE IN THE HOOOOLE
Apheori (GM): Frezak: d20
Frezak (GM): MADNESS
3
WHOOO
Apheori (GM): Er, how out of the way did the others get?
Aziraphale: I went a fair bit.
Given my cautious and conservative and risk-averse nature.
Bear Soup Guy: Rhu and I have presumably been walking up the stairs this whole time
Apheori (GM): Okay, so Azir's off to the side and the other two are up by the door.
Gravy: You shoot a fireball at the metal, only to have it go right through it and explode on the stairs below Greibel and Rhu.
The Gravedigger: SORRY.
Greibel: Hey man, that stuff's dangerous
Block of metal sobs quietly.
The Gravedigger: TOO HOT FOR YOU TO HANDLE, EH?
DIDN'T SWALLOW THAT ONE.
JUST TAKE IT LIKE A GOOD GIRL.
Greibel: Dude, you're talking to a metal wall
And /I'm/ the crazy one for pouring paint on my head
The Gravedigger: Azi talked to it.
You didn't call HIM crazy!
Greibel: Well Azi is from here. Who knows what they do with metal walls?
The Gravedigger: Talk to them, apparently.
Greibel: Apparently
Aziraphale: HEY!
I don't normally talk to walls.
The Gravedigger: So you SAY.
Greibel: I just want to know how the thing with the paint and the lava lamp sky was any more crazy than talking to a wall
The Gravedigger reloads the gun.
Radek: To be fair, we've come to expect it from you at this point.
The Gravedigger: You want to try, Radek?
I'lll let you have a turn.
Radek: Very well.
Ganelon: Straight d20?
Apheori (GM): Might as well.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
4
)
=
4
Frezak (GM): GORRAM
Apheori (GM): Azir: You hear the wall chunk screaming.
The fireball goes right through again, though.
Ganelon: I'll hand the weapon back.
Aziraphale shudders slightly
Frezak (GM): Okay, there any windows?
Greibel: (to Azi) It's okay dude, I talk to zombie chickens. I was just giving him a hard time.
Apheori (GM): No windows, but you might be able to just climb over it if you tried.
Aziraphale relaxes slightly
Frezak (GM): I'll give that a try?
Athletics?
Apheori (GM): Do it.
Frezak (GM): I'll stow my shield for this.
rolling 1D20+8
(
18
)
+8
=
26
Apheori (GM): You climb over the thing.
Leaving Radek behind.
Ganelon: I'll approach the wall.
Frezak (GM): And proposition it.
Apheori (GM): Gan: d20
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
7
)
=
7
Apheori (GM): The wall chunk sits there.
Radek: Stand at attention, barrier! Against my better judgment, I am speaking to you.
Apheori (GM): The wall chunk continues to sit there.
d20
Radek:
rolling 1d20
(
15
)
=
15
Apheori (GM): Your doubt in what you're trying to do remains, and the wall chunk likewise remains stolid.
Frezak (GM): You want me to throw you a rope to help you climb over?
Radek: You will move out of my way, or otherwise phase to a state of non-solidity at once, or I shall be forced to obliterate you thoroughly.
Frezak (GM): Are you Intimidating a wall?
Radek pokes at the obstruction with the barrel of his rifle.
Rhu: Or you could use a rope to climb over.
Ganelon: Yes.
Apheori (GM): Gan: d20
Radek:
rolling 1d20
(
11
)
=
11
Greibel: Show that wall who's boss, Guru-man!
Apheori (GM): SANE MAN.
Ganelon: Still solid, then.
Apheori (GM): The wall starts trembling in fear. You all see it.
Frezak (GM): What.
Radek: Well?! What will it be? My uninterrupted passage or your righteous destruction?
Apheori (GM): Radek: d20
Radek:
rolling 1d20
(
9
)
=
9
Apheori (GM): The wall is still trembling.
The Gravedigger: I have rope!
Ganelon: I'll poke it again.
Apheori (GM): Azir: You hear it apologising.
The poke goes through.
Ganelon: Then I'll attempt to pass through.
Apheori (GM): d20
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
20
)
=
20
COME ON
Apheori (GM): Heh.
Heh.
Heh.
Frezak (GM) sighs.
Bear Soup Guy is enjoying this
Frezak (GM): With this many rolls, chances of him getting past like this are pretty slim.
Apheori (GM): His chances were getting better each time. This is how the descent into madness works.
Greibel: That actually makes sense
err
OOC
Ganelon: Well, what happens?
Apheori (GM): Anyway, Radek, you walk into the wall. It resists, but you're sick and tired of this and manage to pass through anyway. When you come out the other side, however, you're covered in a strange metlalic film.
Radek: Fascinating.
Frezak (GM): Delightful.
Greibel: Groovy
Ganelon: Unless it's inhibiting my ability to breathe.
Apheori (GM): You realise you can't breathe.
Frezak (GM): That might be an undesirable outcome.
That's bad.
Apheori (GM): Then you realise it doesn't seem to matter?
Frezak (GM): Worse.
Apheori (GM): You feel fine. You feel better than you have in quite awhile, in fact.
Ganelon: Nah, he'd be pretty cool with that. Breathing sucks anyway, just like eating.
The Gravedigger: SO are you a robot now?
Greibel: He's like the Silver Surfer with a cool beard
Radek: I haven't the faintest idea.
Rhu: Do you feel alright? You look very... shiny.
Frezak (GM): They made him eat his own sausages.
Radek: Better than alright, I think. But let's not tarry, there's work yet to be done.
Frezak (GM): onwards.
Ganelon: All things considered this is a very acceptable state of affairs.
Rhu: The door won't open.
Frezak (GM): graaah
Apheori (GM): Oops.
Oh, whatever.
Rhu tried the door and it wouldn't open.
Frezak (GM): What kind of door is it?
What kind of locK?
Apheori (GM): Slidey door. Glass. Electric lock.
Frezak (GM): Radek?
Finangle,
Ganelon: Messing with electronics then?
Frezak (GM): Anyone have a better idea?
Greibel: Or we could break the glass...
Greibel taps the glass with his staff
Rhu hits it with whatever his weapon is.
Apheori (GM): It cracks.
Frezak (GM): Rhu has a Maul.
Apheori (GM): The maul cracked it.
Frezak (GM): great
Apheori (GM): Do something.
Ganelon: Just thinking.
Frezak (GM): Well we go in!
Ganelon: Cracked or shattered?
Greibel pushes it
Ganelon: Because I'm not opposed to at least testing this weird metallic stuff against sharp glass.
Apheori (GM): Cracked.
And now it's more cracked.
Greibel: Oh yeah, test your skin suit, guru-man
Radek: Gladly.
Ganelon: I will slam this window with all the force of a single emaciated old man.
Or glass surface, if you prefer.
Apheori (GM): XD
You slam into it and it partly melts and partly shatters.
Some bits stick to you and melt into the strange metallic film.
Ganelon: He's way to grumpy to show it, but Radek thinks this is really cool.
Alright, I'll climb through if a suitable hole can be made.
Greibel: Wicked
Apheori (GM): It's pretty holed now.
Big enough for the others to follow as well.
Frezak (GM): I do so.
Greibel does so
Apheori (GM): You're in a hallway. There's a sign posted that says 'BRUNCH TEUSDAY' and some stairs and an elevator.
Greibel: Hey, what day is it?
Frezak (GM): The sign is misspelled?
Ganelon: I was just about to ask.
Greibel Greibel rubs his stomach absently
Apheori (GM): You don't know. The sun disappeared and the stars never came out and now the sky was just glowing weirdly with cracks.
Frezak: Sure, why not.
Greibel: Well, let's hope it's Tuesday...
Radek: We can have brunch without a sign permitting us to.
Well, you can. I'll do without.
Frezak (GM): Stairs going up?
Apheori (GM): Up and down.
Frezak (GM): I go up.
Apheori (GM): Everyone: d20
Frezak (GM): MADNESS
5
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
18
)
=
18
Aziraphale:
rolling 1d20
(
13
)
=
13
Rhu:
rolling 1d20
(
4
)
=
4
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
18
)
=
18
Apheori (GM): Gravy and Rhu hear strange noises and what might be voices as you enter the stairwell.
The Gravedigger: I hear noises.
Rhu: Voices?
The Gravedigger: Maybe.
Radek: I don't.
Rhu: Rattling, creaking, scraping...
The Gravedigger: Awesome.
Let's keep going.
Aziraphale: I hear nothing.
Greibel: I always hear things
But no more than usual
Apheori (GM): You climb a lot.
Frezak (GM): okay.
Apheori (GM): Azir and Rhu fall behind because it's pretty exhausting.
Absolutely nothing weird happens.
Wen: They don't wait for us? The bastards.
Apheori (GM): Eh, you're not that far behind.
Yes.
Yet.
Ganelon: I assume it would be normal for me to be falling behind too.
Apheori (GM): It probably would be normal, but you're not.
Frezak (GM): I'm the apex of physical prowess.
Apheori (GM): You and Greibel both.
...somehow.
Well, aside from the strength.
Frezak (GM): Smoking is apparently great.
Apheori (GM): But nevermind that.
Bear Soup Guy: It sure is
Ganelon: Greibel's a pretty tough guy, actually.
He's the second most durable in the party, if not the best armored (that would be Azi)
Frezak (GM): I KEEP WALKING.
Apheori (GM): So you guys probably slow down for the others?
Okay, he doesn't.
Wen: I have a feeling that the DM is going to drag me out and shoot me or something by deliberately leaving me with an NPC
>.>
Aziraphale walks more quickly
Apheori (GM): Eh, the NPC is supposed to be a PC; the player just isn't here.
Ganelon: In this crazy place?
Apheori (GM): But you can never count on anything.
Ganelon: If you need to be removed, it wouldn't be unexpected for you to just disappear.
Apheori (GM): Dude, that shouldn't be unexpected regardless.
Ganelon: Hyper-dimensional manhole.
Bear Soup Guy: YOU'VE REACHED THE MANHOLE
Oh sorry
Apheori (GM): Fortunately you have not encountered any maholes.
Yes.
Yet.
Ganelon: I wouldn't trust one to be stable for an instant.
Apheori (GM): Okay, so you all keep climbing. Rhu gets left a bit behind.
Manholes are never stable.
This is why they stay in the ground.
Everyone roll a d20
Frezak (GM): MADNESS
16
Rhu:
rolling d20
(
4
)
=
4
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
13
)
=
13
Aziraphale:
rolling 1d20
(
19
)
=
19
Wen: BSG!
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20
(
1
)
=
1
Frezak (GM): great
Wen: crap.
Apheori (GM): Rhu collapses.
Aziraphale: Hey, stop! Rhu collapsed!
The Gravedigger: Well? Pick him up!
Apheori (GM): Greibel turns into bats and flaps up to a door, hits it, and bounces off.
Greibel: Oik!
Aziraphale: I think we'd better take a rest.
Frezak (GM): Blaaargh.
Aziraphale: Greibel doesn't look too good either.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: There is something very important there and you MUST get to it.
Greibel continues trying to fly at the door
Apheori (GM): Having a wildshaping crazy person is awesome.
Wen: Typical. If someone rolls a 1, bad things happen. 19? Nope, nothing, nothing at all. It's just like life.
Gotta get lucky to live normally, but a bit of rotten luck can get you down
/nick Marvin >.>
Frezak (GM): I grab the swarm.
Apheori (GM): Make a grabby thing.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+4
(
18
)
+4
=
22
Vs... AC or reflex? I forget.
Ganelon: Reflex.
Apheori (GM): Do swarms get extra anything? For being swarms.
Frezak (GM): Nope.
4E is weird that way.
Ganelon: Strangely, not against grabs.
Apheori (GM): Great. You now have a swarm of bats.
Did anyone get Rhu?
Aziraphale: Can we get him to turn back?
Frezak (GM): I drag the swarm of bats up the stairs.
Aziraphale: I'm dragging him
Apheori (GM): Okay.
You're almost to the floor with the important things.
Frezak (GM): great.
Apheori (GM): The bats seriously struggle as you pull them away from that door.
Frezak (GM): I seriously pull.
Opposed strength checks?
Apheori (GM): Oh, you win.
But they like that door a lot.
Frezak (GM): Well, tough.
Aziraphale: Maybe we should check out that door?
The Gravedigger: Because the drug-crazed shapeshifter is always so useful.
Always pointing out useful things.
Aziraphale: Well, why else did you bring him?
The Gravedigger: Not my choice.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: d20
Ganelon: Poor Greibel. Nobody ever believes him.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20
(
6
)
=
6
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
11
)
=
11
Apheori (GM): Okay, nothing changes with them.
Greibel flaps around
Apheori (GM): Gravy: d20
The Gravedigger: MADNESS
18
Apheori (GM): You make it to the door you want and spill out into the corridor.
There are streaks of mostly dried blood on the floor, like someone was dragging something bloody through.
Frezak (GM): great
Apheori (GM): Nondescript doors line the corridor. The blood leads past them.
Aziraphale follows the blood
Apheori (GM): Azir: You realise there are footprints in it, probably from the dragger struggling with it. They appear to be hooflike.
Ganelon: I don't object to this course of action.
Apheori (GM): everyone but Azir: d20
Rhu:
rolling 1d20
(
11
)
=
11
Frezak (GM): MADNESS
10
Aziraphale: guys, look, there are hoofprints in the blood.
Apheori (GM): Rhu recovers and gets up.
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
13
)
=
13
Rhu: This feels like a dead end.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
17
)
=
17
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You calm down and forget whatever had you so agitated.
Aziraphale: Still batty though?
Bear Soup Guy: Am I bats?
Frezak (GM): Fells like a dead end to Rhu, looks like what to the rest of us?
Apheori (GM): You're still bats unless you stop being bats.
The rest of you don't feel anything in particular about it, though it's pretty messy.
Bear Soup Guy: I stop being bats
Ganelon: Can I even get messy at this point?
Apheori (GM): Gravy winds up with an armful of stoned druid.
Wen: where does the blood lead?
Apheori (GM): Gan: You don't know.
Ganelon: Well then.
Apheori (GM): Azir follows the blood to a door around the corner. The locking mechanism seems to be busted in, but the door is shut.
Aziraphale cautiously attempts to turn the handle
Apheori (GM): Azir reaches for the handle, and the door opens at the pressure. Not even latched.
Inside, there is blood everywhere - covering the floor, across the chairs, and seeping into the walls and monitors.
Aziraphale: Eugh.
Apheori (GM): You realise this was probably the room you were after, too.
Greibel: Like I always say
Apheori (GM): There's some equipment inside that looks similarly busted to the locking mechanism, and similarly drenched in blood to everything else.
Greibel: The room covered in blood is probably where some interesting stuff happened
Rhu: Hazz'ridan.
The Gravedigger: Huh.
Greibel: Come again?
Rhu: A dead end.
Greibel: Well...
The Gravedigger: Some things might still work.
Apheori (GM): SANITY EVERYONE.
The Gravedigger: 19
Apheori (GM): Lots of blood, horrible smell, very awful.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20
(
9
)
=
9
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
1
)
=
1
Bear Soup Guy: Oh bugger
Frezak (GM): graah
Aziraphale:
rolling 1d20
(
6
)
=
6
...
Apheori (GM): Greibel disappears.
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Aziraphale: GREIBELLLLL
Apheori (GM): Rhu and Azir feel the room seems to... slide.
Aziraphale backs out of the room
Apheori (GM): Everything flickers for a bit, like reality ain't quite sure what it's doing.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
3
)
=
3
Sorry, late.
Apheori (GM): Radek feels the same thing, and falls over, landing in the blood.
Ganelon: Bwuh.
Apheori (GM): Some of it is absorbed into the shiny suit.
Frezak (GM): Gravy will leave the room and sit down with his head in his hands.
Ganelon: At this rate, my shiny suit will surely be ruined.
Apheori (GM): Rhu backs away and runs into Gravy.
Ganelon: Am I still conscious and in control of my actions?
Apheori (GM): Yeah. You just fell over.
Ganelon: I suppose I'll stand up and look around, then.
Apheori (GM): There's less blood now.
Not a whole lot to see, though. Busted equipment. Blood on everything.
You might be able to get parts, but they'd be bloody parts.
The blood also doesn't smell quite right. You're not sure what kind it is.
Ganelon: I don't have an easy way to clean stuff other than people, strangely.
Guess I'll just walk outside.
Unless there's a roll I can do to identify this blood.
Wen: I think aside from Greibel all of us are outside.
Ganelon: That doesn't seem like something Radek would be good at, though.
Apheori (GM): Everyone is in the hall. Greibel is gone. You can identify the blood from outside.
That's true.
Greibel might have been the best bet with his nature and crap, though maybe not.
(From Aziraphale): can I disappear for 10-15 minutes or so? Or is there a plot element involving me coming up?
Radek: I don't think we have much hope of fixing this equipment.
Aziraphale: Hmm. How are we going to look for Greibel?
(To Wen): Best have you around, though. Perhaps we should all just break for a bit? I could use some lunch.
(From Aziraphale): either way. Your call.
Apheori (GM): Let's take a break. Wen needs to do something and I need lunch.
Radek: I wish I could say it were possible to put a trace on him, but...
Rhu: But?
Radek: Well, would you really expect it to be reliable?
Rhu: Bah!
This place!
It pleases Hazz'ridan, I'm sure.
Ganelon: Actually, radios. Still unusable?
Apheori (GM): Good question.
LUNCH FIRST.
Apheori (GM) runs away.
Ganelon: Sure.
Apheori (GM): Wen: DO YOUR THING.
Bear Soup Guy: Bow chicka bow wow
Wen twiddles his thumbs
Apheori (GM): Okay, back.
Peeling shrimp and cleaning cilantro, these things can't be rushed. I know this because I tried. >.<
Wen: sounds exotic
Apheori (GM): If by exotic, you mean what I have every day when I'm too lazy to do anything else, then yes.
Okay, so is everyone else still here?
Gan was going to try radios...
Ganelon: I'm here.
Bear Soup Guy: Right-o
Wen: Frezak?
Apheori (GM): I guess the Gravedigger dozed off.
Ganelon: I'm sure Frezak will be back.
Apheori (GM): Aye.
So radios?
Frezak (GM): Well, radios?
I'm not trying mine, since all mine did was scream at me.
Ganelon: Radios.
Aziraphale checks his
Wen: keep in mind mine's probably local, not spaceship stuff.
Apheori (GM): Azir: d20
Ganelon: Let's see if anyone can get a hold of Houdini here.
Aziraphale:
rolling 1d20
(
3
)
=
3
Wen: ...
Apheori (GM): Azir hears a suggestive voice come out of his and try to chat him up.
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Frezak (GM): probability would dictate that half the party is going to be useless at any given moment.
Wen: I resolutely ignore it and stuff the thing back in my pocket.
Apheori (GM): Heh.
Ganelon: I'll try mine.
Apheori (GM): d20
Ganelon: Perhaps it will whisper unknowable secrets to me.
rolling 1d20
(
13
)
=
13
Apheori (GM): It turns on and complains about the low signal strength.
Bear Soup Guy: Bloody service providers
Apheori (GM): It locates the others in range - Rhu's and Gravy's, as well as another that identifies as 'Sexy'.
Wen: what about Greibel's?
Apheori (GM): It doesn't find it.
Aziraphale: Well, this isn't very helpful.
(To Greibel): So I guess you're probably having an adventure somewhere weird while all of this is going on.
Aziraphale: How are we going to look for Greibel?
Bear Soup Guy: http://data2.whicdn.com/images/69136546/large.jpg
Radek: Last time, we had a network of security cameras.
Rhu: What's the local signal range?
The Gravedigger: eh, we can just leave.
he'll come around eventually.
Ganelon: What IS the local signal range?
Enough to cover this building, I'm sure.
Apheori (GM): You check and find it should cover most of the city.
Frezak (GM): Not that any of the dimensions mean anything at all here.
Aziraphale: So Greibel's just gone.
The Gravedigger: Or not.
Space and time here are a bloody mess.
Nothing means anything.
Wen: try dialing 911? >.> would that work?
Radek scoffs. "Literally bloody, in this case."
Wen: (or the Srathi equivalent)
The Gravedigger: Ho. Ho. Ho.
Apheori (GM): There's noone to call. You would have tried when you first found everyone gone.
Wen: well, my radio wasn't working.
but okay.
The Gravedigger: We're not gonna get anywhere like this.
Apheori (GM): Oh.
Well, whatever. There's nothing in range. >.<
The Gravedigger: I'm going back down. Maybe find a ship or something that works.
Aziraphale: Nothing in this building that would connect outside?
Radek: Nothing that hasn't been destroyed.
You want to spend a few weeks here cleaning the place up while I do repairs, be my guest.
We'll all lose our minds first.
Aziraphale: Fair enough.
Let's go then.
Ganelon: I consent to this "going."
Frezak (GM): Clomp, clomp, clomp.
Aziraphale: (poor Greibel)
Wen: so do we make it outside minus Greibel?
Apheori (GM): Roll d20s.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
20
)
=
20
The Gravedigger: Bah, he's stoned. Have you seen him WITHOUT a grin on his face?
Rhu:
rolling d20
(
18
)
=
18
Ganelon: SUPER SANE
Aziraphale:
rolling 1d20
(
4
)
=
4
The Gravedigger: 12
Apheori (GM): You all find another exit out the other side of the building. Do you take it, or continue back down to the exit with the chunk of metal on the stairs?
Frezak (GM): Does this other exit appear obstructed at all?
Apheori (GM): Naw. Seems to lead into something of a park, with random other buildings and towers all around.
Frezak (GM): Sure?
Guys?
Ganelon: Sure.
Aziraphale: Yeah, why not
so long as it doesn't try to talk to me
Aziraphale shudders
Ganelon: Poor paladin, ever assaulted by temptations.
From inanimate objects.
Apheori (GM): And Radek starts glowing.
At least Azir thinks he does.
Radek: Hm.
Ganelon: Oh. He doesn't notice?
Apheori (GM): Radek probably notices something, but not the glow itself.
Aziraphale: Er, Radek, are you alright?
Radek: I feel fine.
The Gravedigger: His skin is made of metal and glass and blood.
Of course he's fine.
Aziraphale: well, only he's glowing
that or I'm going insane, or both
Probably both.
Radek: With any luck, it'll stay like this long enough for me to study it.
...Marvelous substance.
Apheori (GM): You all hear a loud crack from one of the trees in the park.
Greibel and a branch fall out.
Frezak (GM): Great.
We find a stoner.
Greibel: Ow!
Wen: is he in humanoid shape?
Frezak (GM): How else would we recognise him?
Apheori (GM): Yeah.
The Gravedigger: Hey, Greibel.
Greibel: What happened, man?
Radek: You disappeared again.
Greibel: Oh yeah
it was so peaceful...
I was in a field of nature.
And I became one with the nature.
The sun and the birds and the trees and the plants.
Much better than this place.
Radek: Welcome back to reality.
Greibel: But this was reality too!
Radek: Well, your job is to stay in this shitty one along with the rest of us.
At least physically, if it can be helped.
Greibel: Okay, guru man. But did you ever think the blissful utopia reality might have something to do with the shitty reality that disappeared me to it?
Rhu: And how did you wind up over here?
The Gravedigger: magic.
Rhu: Of all the places. Pretty specific.
(To Bear Soup Guy): You may notice this tree looks suspiciously similar to the one you were under before, though a bit less healthy.
Radek: How am I supposed to know which reality is causing problems for the others?
Greibel: Hey man, I was sitting under this tree.
For...ever, it feels like
Must've been forever. It's looking a little weathered.
Radek: The paladin here says he was part of an experiment, but for all we know, this could have been someone else's fault entirely.
Greibel: Poor little guy, we had a lot of good times in that other reality
Aziraphale: So what do we do?
Rhu: Pray for a dead end.
Radek: I'd rather a solution.
Aziraphale: Why do you keep mentioning dead ends?
Ganelon: Ha. Chemistry joke
The Gravedigger: Because he's a zealot for a god that loves dead ends.
Rhu: Hazz'ridan is the lord of, above all other things, dead ends. When there is nothing else left, there is always a dead end.
Greibel: Not the weirdest God I've heard of...
Aziraphale: Well, it does look like we have a dead end in so far that we're stuck
maybe your god can help us?
Rhu: I'm afraid he's more in the business of creating dead ends than getting folks out of them.
Aziraphale: Oh.
The Gravedigger: Don't see why we'd ask for we already have.
Rhu: There's still hope. Hazz'ridan could help to take away the hope so we can simply give in.
The Gravedigger: That sounds just great.
Rhu: It does?
The Gravedigger: Let's pray so that we can mope.
Because that's gonna help SO MUCH.
Rhu: Yes! It will.
The Gravedigger: I'm going to go look for a boat.
(From Aziraphale): My god is called Carriya, yes? I lost the link >.>
Greibel: Hey, I remember boats
(From Aziraphale): law, order and process.. I think?
(To Wen): Yeah.
(From Aziraphale): okay.
Aziraphale looks at the sky
(To Wen): You also probably consider Hazz'ridan to be a bit of a joke.
(From Aziraphale): I'm sure they are.
Apheori (GM): Azir: d20
(To Wen): Yes.
Aziraphale:
rolling 1d20
(
5
)
=
5
Wen: >.<
Apheori (GM): Gravedigger: The borders of the park have car-ship thingies docked at them.
Ganelon: We need to put on blinders.
Apheori (GM): They look fairly intact.
Frezak (GM): I'll check to see if any have keys in and/or seem intact after prodding and examination.
Greibel: Hey, can I poke a dust car this time?
Apheori (GM): Azir: You see the sky glowing with that same eiery glow, full of cracks, a large hole growing out of them.
Azir: As you watch, the hole widens, then entirely opens, revealing an enormous eye.
Aziraphale: AAAAAGH.
Apheori (GM): Azir: It stares directly at you.
At, and possibly through.
Aziraphale averts his eyes
Apheori (GM): Greibel, Gravy: d20
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
13
)
=
13
Rhu:
rolling d20
(
9
)
=
9
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You poke a car and it doesn't turn to dust. It also seems to have the keys lying on the front seat.
Greibel is disappointed but will accept this positive turn of fate
Ganelon: Oh, neat.
Frezak (GM): 3
Apheori (GM): Rhu is just staring at the sky in horrow.
Gravy, fortunately for him, isn't looking at that. Yay Gravy.
Also Gravy doesn't find any vehicles that look like they'd work without hotwiring, though they do look functional.
Greibel tries the door of the car thing
Apheori (GM): Door opens, and the roof retracts. It's a fairly nice convertible thing.
Greibel tries to start it
Ganelon: I'll head over and check this functioning vehicle out.
Apheori (GM): It asks for a password.
Gan: d20
Frezak (GM): Swordfish.
Greibel smacks the steering wheel/column/joystick/whatever in frustration
Apheori (GM): It accepts the smack as the password.
Greibel: Nice!
I'm so gonna paint this thing tie-dye
I found a thing guys!
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
10
)
=
10
Frezak (GM): I'll head over and look.
Apheori (GM): Radek looks up at the sky and just sees the same sky as before.
Radek: Do you know how to drive? Actually, no, forget I asked. I'm not putting my life in your hands regardless.
Apheori (GM): Weird and kind of sickening, but not staring.
Greibel: d20
Rhu:
rolling 1d20
(
14
)
=
14
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
5
)
=
5
Ganelon: Preferable to staring, certainly.
Rhu recovers and joins the others at the ship-car-thing.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You notice the sky.
It's HORRIBLE.
Greibel: Radek take the wheel
OH GOD WHAT AH SKY
THIS IS A BAD TRIP, MAN
Aziraphale: Yes, yes, take it easy now.
Radek, does the ship work?
Rhu: It's just staring.
Greibel huddles into a ball in the back of the car thing
The Gravedigger: Maybe the person that's not screaming or falling over should drive?
Greibel shivers in terror
Ganelon: Let's try it out.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: d20
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
18
)
=
18
Apheori (GM): Radek: d20
Ganelon: Do the controls work?
rolling 1d20
(
2
)
=
2
Damn.
Apheori (GM): The controls refuse to cooperate.
Aziraphale: Does the radio work?
Apheori (GM): Greibel: The sense that the sky is horrible and is going to eat you and etc fades.
It still looks horrible, but you just don't look at it.
Greibel calms a bit
Greibel: Hey Radek, try hitting it!
Ganelon: Sure, I'll try hitting it.
Apheori (GM): You hit it. Nothing really changes, but you wonder if maybe you just botched it at first?
Ganelon: May I try again?
Apheori (GM): So Radek and Gravy are in the front, and everyone else is piled on the back, I suppose.
And yeah, you can.
Do it.
Roll.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
5
)
=
5
Alas!
Poor Radek, I knew him well.
Frezak (GM): can i lean over and poke the things?
Apheori (GM): You keep trying and it finally cooperates after a minute or two.
Frezak (GM): oh, good.
Apheori (GM): You can poke all the things if you want.
Frezak (GM): Nah, i'm good now.
Aziraphale: Just don't break it
Bear Soup Guy: heh heh
Greibel: Road trip, guys
Radek: Alright! Destination?
Apheori (GM): WHOO!
Go somewhere!
Aziraphale: wait wait
Frezak (GM): Check out one of the spaceship wrecks.
Aziraphale: does the radio work?
Ganelon: Don't worry guys, I might be an old person behind the wheel, but I'm at least reasonably sane and not on drugs!
Frezak (GM): Ideally the one that's not at the bottom of the sea.
THat you know of, Gan.
Rhu: No, you're just part robot.
Greibel: Tune in some jams!
Ganelon: That I know of!
And sure, I'll mess with the radio.
Not expecting much of a broadcast.
Just more madness.
Apheori (GM): The radio buzzes and picks up some automated transmissions.
Aziraphale: I meant like, for communication. Not music.
Or does this ship not have that?
Apheori (GM): Most of them are music, some are numbers, and there's this one number that's transmitting these weird clicking noises...
Aziraphale: eee.
Radek: Doesn't sound like anyone's broadcasting /news/.
Frezak (GM): LIke a giant bug monster or a Geiger counter?
Apheori (GM): The latter.
Frezak (GM): Awesome.
Just. Great.
Wen: what's the range of this thing?
Apheori (GM): Should be able to cover the planet given time; the real issue seems to be speed since it's an open-top.
Ganelon: I think he meant the radio.
Apheori (GM): Oh.
Who knows.
Ganelon: But hell if I know that answer.
Aziraphale: I meant the ship. But sure, the radio too.
Oh.
Apheori (GM): Unless any of you specialise in leisure boats.
Frezak (GM): So, wreck?
Rhu: The sky...
Ganelon: Can't say I do.
Aziraphale: Sure.
Ganelon: Wreck sounds good unless someone else has a suggestion.
Radek: Yes, Rhu, it's been acting up all day.
Rhu: It's watching.
Radek makes rude gestures at the sky.
Apheori (GM): Radek: d20
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
3
)
=
3
Apheori (GM): The sky opens its eye and stares at you.
It seems it did not approve of your rude gestures. 
Ganelon: Good!
Apheori (GM): XD
Ganelon: Let's get a move on.
Apheori (GM): Heh.
Okay, so you fly the boat down toward the sea.
Do you know which way the wreck was?
Frezak (GM): We can compare on maps.
I'm assuming we made SOME sort of notes about the places we intended to visit.
Ganelon: Well, I as a player do not. It's merely a destination to me.
Apheori (GM): Does your character? >.>
Frezak (GM): I was looking at it on a map a few hours ago.
Apheori (GM): Because if so I'm just inclined to say you go there, have you all roll sanity checks on the way, and move to the destination.
Great. You all go there.
Roll.
Ganelon: He was rather interested in the anomalous growth of power cells.
rolling 1d20
(
3
)
=
3
Frezak (GM): 7
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
4
)
=
4
Rhu:
rolling 1d20
(
15
)
=
15
Bear Soup Guy: Gonna be a bumpy ride...
Aziraphale:
rolling 1d20
(
15
)
=
15
Rhu: Greibel and Radek see another city in the distance on the way.
Apheori (GM): Oops.
Well, anyway, you see it.
Everyone else feels the sky staring at them.
Aziraphale: This sky is really putting a damper on my spirits
Greibel hangs his head out the side of the car like a bemused labrador
Rhu: Eyes of the All-seeing, Nightmares and waking...
The ways are blind.
Apheori (GM): Radek: You wind up flying to the other city instead of the wreckage.
Greibel: Hey cheer up man, it's just another couple miles
Apheori (GM): Radek: You realise this before you actually get there, though.
Ganelon: OLD MAN AT THE WHEEEL
Could we still reach the wreckage in a reasonable amount of time?
Apheori (GM): Yeah.
Ganelon: I'll turn that way, then.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Ganelon: Radek would not remark about this to the others.
Apheori (GM): Everyone roll d20 again.
Heh.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
14
)
=
14
Rhu:
rolling 1d20
(
20
)
=
20
Apheori (GM): Huh.
Aziraphale:
rolling 1d20
(
9
)
=
9
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
8
)
=
8
Frezak (GM): 17
Apheori (GM): Greibel is now a herd of pygmy moose in the back seat.
Frezak (GM): Wow. What a surprise.
Apheori (GM): Azir is hearing voices, mostly yelling at someone to take out the garbage.
Nobody jumps out of the vehicle.
Wen: Oh good, I thought the seat cushion was going to talk to me.
Apheori (GM): Rhu stares at the sky, not in fear or horror, but now like he's thinking.
So. Wreckage. It's a large heap of twisted metal and stuff, somehow floating.
There are large blobulous things growing off it.
If there are more of them underwater, that may be what's keeping it up, since they look like they're hollow.
Frezak (GM): Any way we can check that they're... volatile?
SHort of throwing crap at them?
Ganelon: Also, do we have a place to land?
Apheori (GM): The vehicle hovers, so you can park it wherever.
Frezak: You could shoot them. Or someone could magic at them.
Gan: They look like the power cells, but now they're a lot bigger. And they've multiplied.
Ganelon: Find an isolated one first. If they explode, I want them.
Frezak (GM): And that is the last resort.
>.>
DO we have no other way?
Can we NAture it?
Ganelon: I could attempt magic at them.
Frezak (GM): To see if it ressembles explosive plants or something?
Apheori (GM): There's one near the edge that's fairly alone.
You hover over it.
Ganelon: Let's go for magic first. You've said pretty much everything is magical of some sort before.
Apheori (GM): Right.
Do a magic!
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+10
(
13
)
+10
=
23
Apheori (GM): And what exactly were you doing?
Ganelon: Trying to see what's happened to them.
Apheori (GM): Right, but how, I mean. What kind of magic did you use?
TEEEELL ME ALL.
Also the sky is still staring at you.
Ganelon: Well, I'm not attacking it.
Apheori (GM): >.>
Ganelon: I'll shoot the sky later.
I don't know what you mean by "kind of magic", though.
Apheori (GM): You discern that they are alive, but not like things are supposed to be alive. They're growing and mutating and not very hungry and actually quite happy.
Ganelon: It's arcane magic with a structured and technical bias.
Is each glob a separate entity?
As in, could one be separated?
From... itself.
Apheori (GM): They seem to be, though they're also connected. Even if you took one away, the others would still... be... well, you're not quite sure.
Everyone: Blobbulous things glow at you.
Ganelon: I'm thinking more like cutting a piece off of one.
Apheori (GM): These, I mean.
You could try.
You don't know what would happen, or if it'd even notice.
Aziraphale stares
Radek: Anyone have a knife?
Aziraphale: I have a sword
that work?
Radek: Well enough.
Apheori (GM): Azir: You have knives.
Give him a knife.
Aziraphale: Oh, I do?
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Aziraphale hands Radek a knife
Ganelon: Alright, let's bottle up some living power cell... flesh.
Apheori (GM): Everyone: d20
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
5
)
=
5
Aziraphale:
rolling 1d20
(
12
)
=
12
Frezak (GM): 7
Rhu:
rolling 1d20
(
14
)
=
14
Apheori (GM): Flock of moose. Roll.
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
14
)
=
14
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You're a happy flock of moose.
Greibel: :D
Apheori (GM): Rhu pets the flock of moose.
Radek: The entities start pulsating.
Ganelon: Uh oh.
Before or after I've cut into one?
Apheori (GM): You haven't cut yet.
You were about to, and then this happened.
Ganelon: Do these things still contain power?
Apheori (GM): Well, they're glowing.
So they probably contain at least some.
Ganelon: I don't know about future fuel cells, but all fuel is fundamentally a compressed power source.
Apheori (GM): They've been growing, though, so who knows what that means.
Ganelon: And I'd rather they not explode.
Apheori (GM): Hee.
Ganelon: So I'll steer us away.
Not too far that I can't observe.
Rhu: Weren't you going to get a sample?
Radek: They started moving.
These things used to be power cells. I'm not taking my chances.
Apheori (GM): Gravy, Azir: You saw no moving.
Just so you know.
Greibel nuzzles everyone
Apheori (GM): Oh gods I love the swarms.
This is awesome.
Aziraphale: I'm getting sick and tired of seeing things others don't see and not seeing things others do see
Aziraphale sulks
Rhu puts a moose on Azir's lap.
Radek: Well, watch closely. I'm taking a shot.
Ganelon: Rifle time.
Aziraphale watches attentively
Apheori (GM): Which do you want to shoot?
Ganelon: The one we were near.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Greibel nuzzles Radek's arm
Ganelon: Shall I roll it?
Apheori (GM): Do it.
Ganelon: [Weapon Attack - Rifle]
rolling 1d20+3+5+0
(
4
)
+3+5+0
=
12
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You roll too.
Ganelon: Hmph.
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
10
)
=
10
Apheori (GM): Radek: You missed.
On the plus side they quit moving.
Ganelon: Reload and try again.
[Weapon Attack - Rifle]
rolling 1d20+3+5+0
(
4
)
+3+5+0
=
12
Wow, it couldn't even be lower?
Apheori (GM): It could if you try again.
Radek: Hmph.
Ganelon: [Weapon Attack - Rifle]
rolling 1d20+3+5+0
(
9
)
+3+5+0
=
17
Radek: I need to tune this thing.
Apheori (GM): You hit the glowing mutated power cell and it just sort of deflates.
Ganelon: Still glowing?
Greibel squeels with delight
Apheori (GM): Then the others are getting brighter and brighter, pulling the light out of the air around.
Frezak (GM): Bags of magic.
Apheori (GM): The air shifts and tastes odd, and then there is a shimmering in the space around them, a horrible ripping once more, voices calling out, sunlight, stars, and fish.
The eye in the sky is still staring down.
Radek: Interesting reaction.
Apheori (GM): The the wreckage and surrounding ocean are gone, torn away, leaving behind only an emptiness in their place.
An emptiness that is pulling your vehicle toward it as well.
Ganelon: WELP NO TIME FOR SCIENCE
RUNNING TIME NOW
Apheori (GM): Everyone: d20
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
8
)
=
8
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
10
)
=
10
Aziraphale:
rolling 1d20
(
12
)
=
12
Rhu:
rolling 1d20
(
1
)
=
1
Bear Soup Guy: BRB DISHES
Frezak (GM): 5
Apheori (GM): Okay, lessee...
Frezak (GM): Gravy is snoozing.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Radek turns the thing around and gets the hell out of there. It makes some funny noises, but you're far enough away that the pull isn't significant once you're actually moving.
But Rhu starts screaming.
Aziraphale covers Rhu with his cloak
Apheori (GM): It doesn't help.
Aziraphale: Fah.
Frezak (GM): I AM THE PIONEER OF THE PSYCHOLOGICAL REMEDY TECHNIQUE.
HIT HIM WITH A SHOVEL.
Ganelon: The haunted look of Azi's token is becoming a lot more relatable each day.
Frezak (GM): yeah, he's a real downer;
Apheori (GM): Azi was here for days. Now you all are feeling it too!
Frezak (GM): i'm not.
Gravy's napping.
Apheori (GM): The screaming didn't wake him?
Frezak (GM): He's thouroughly bored by the whole affair now.
Ganelon: Well, I'm feeling pretty awesome with this metallic skin-coating, really.
Frezak (GM): Ah.
Well now he's probably grumpy at being woken up.
Not perturbed other than by the volume.
Apheori (GM): You stop away from the pull of the... hole that opened up. Rhu is still screaming.
Frezak (GM): Can I lean over and knock him out for a bit?
Apheori (GM): Certainly.
But don't kill him.
Frezak (GM): Just a bop on the head with a shovel.
Apheori (GM): Roll a shovel bopping.
Aziraphale: Is this wise?
Frezak (GM): Roll to bop:
rolling 1D20+6
(
10
)
+6
=
16
Just a light tap.
Bear Soup Guy: BOP ROLL
Also back and caught up
Apheori (GM): You successfully knock him out.
Greibel: Roll a d20.
The Gravedigger goes back to his nap.
Apheori (GM): The screaming has stopped, at least.
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20
(
9
)
=
9
Apheori (GM): You are now a rather agitated flock of pygmy moose. Probably something to do with the screaming.
But you are aware enough that you could stop being moose if you want to.
Greibel runs around a bit
Greibel: Okay I'm not moose anymore I guess
It sure was fun being moose though
Also WHAT'S GOING ON AAAAHH
Radek: I'm just going to take us somewhere else, if none of you have any other ideas.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You see Rhu is unconscious, the Gravedigger is asleep, Radek is in a bad mood, and Azir just looks haunted.
Frezak (GM): Can we eaxamine the ship at all?
Apheori (GM): The one you're in?
Frezak (GM): No, the other one.
Ganelon: It's gone.
Apheori (GM): The one that turned into a horrible hole in space?
Frezak (GM): Oh, right.
>.>
Well, I have no idea.
What to do.
Ganelon: I'll head towards that city my mad self was so intent on visiting before.
Apheori (GM): Right.
Everyone roll a d20.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
19
)
=
19
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
6
)
=
6
Frezak (GM): 13
Aziraphale:
rolling 1d20
(
8
)
=
8
Apheori (GM): Greibel, Azir: You each become entirely convinced the other is insane.
Wen: well, I'd be right.
Apheori (GM): And trying to kill you.
Yes.
Wen: Oh crap.
Greibel: O_O
Frezak (GM) groans.
Greibel shuffles over to Frezak and tries to wake him up faster
Greibel: err, to the gravedigger
The Gravedigger: WHAT?
Apheori (GM): Rhu wakes up and starts screaming again.
The Gravedigger: Oh, come ON.
Aziraphale hits Rhu with the hilt of his sword
Radek: Do I have to pull over for you idiots!?
Apheori (GM): Radek: Do you just ignore this and go to the city?
Aziraphale: Radek, I think Greibel is insane and trying to kill me.
Greibel: Gravy you gotta stop that crazy man!
Apheori (GM): Because you're almost there.
The Gravedigger: You're all insane.
Now shut up.
Greibel: Fair point, but he's MURDEROUS
Apheori (GM): Rhu is still screaming.
Aziraphale hits again
Apheori (GM): Rhu runs out of breath and starts just staring off at nothing instead.
Bear Soup Guy: Also I should probably leave soon
Apheori (GM): Bah.
Bear Soup Guy: Well y'know, maybe
Like if we're gonna play a lot longer I can just stay
Ganelon: I wouldn't mind. I do have other things that I'd like to do.
Bear Soup Guy: But if we'll be finished soon or other people need to do stuff or something then I should probably go to the store
Ganelon: Writing things.
Bear Soup Guy: mmm
Wen: I think all of our in-game characters are feeling pretty miserable >.>
Apheori (GM): I wonder if it's too late for me to go to the store too.
Heh.
Wen: even Greibel
Bear Soup Guy: heh heh
Apheori (GM): So you want to leave them like this?
Ganelon: Well, he's being beat on by a sword.
Apheori (GM): Preserved in their misery?
Ganelon: Like pickles?
Frezak (GM): I don't see it improving.
Wen: I'm fine with either that, or up to the next save point, so to speak.
Frezak (GM): And Gravy is more bored than miserable.
Wen: well Azir can start saying crazy things to entertain him I guess. Maybe even lend him the free phone sex radio.
He's pretty much half insane by this point, even without the previous roll.
Ganelon: Pfft. As if the radio talks sweet to anyone but you.
Frezak (GM): he's tired of all this silly madness.
Wen: Blame the RNG!
Frezak (GM): You start to go somewhere, half the party goes mad, wait for them to recover, start moving, wait again, get where you were going, learn nothing, go back.
Rinse and repeat.
Maybe he could become a farmer.
Wen: Raise chickens.
Bear Soup Guy: Farmers do need good hole-digging skills
Ganelon: Well, probability dictates that when Apheori makes all of us perform dozens of sanity rolls every day, RNG will make something crazy occur.
Frezak (GM): Yeah, at least something he can DO.
Ganelon: The odds of us getting lucky enough to avoid that are simply too low to ever reasonably occur.
Or unlucky.
Bear Soup Guy: Pah! Odds are for scientists!
Apheori (GM): Well, let's get you all down on the city, at least.
Ganelon: I mean, depends on your perspective regarding sanity.
Frezak (GM): I know that the expedition hasn't been exactly fruitful so far.
Except for Greibel when he fell from a tree.
Wen: hee.
Frezak (GM): That was sort of fruit-like behavior.
Bear Soup Guy: Fruits grow from trees
Frezak (GM): Strange Fruit.
Bear Soup Guy: Trees take patience to grow
Frezak (GM): Stoner fruit.
Bear Soup Guy: =D
Okay well, I'm going to shower and go to the store then I guess
Ganelon: Alright.
Conditions will surely improve eventually!
Bear Soup Guy: Good game guys! Are we doing next Monday then?
Apheori (GM): They will.
Ganelon: I could do Monday.
Wen: I probably won't be too busy until the end of next week-ish (first week of school). After that I don't know.
Frezak (GM): I don't have anything planned.
Wen: it'll have to start a bit later though
since iirc I have class between 11something and 12something.
or you could just start and I could just tag along and start playing when I'm around.
Bear Soup Guy: Right-o
Bye for now then
Wen: bye.
Apheori (GM): So an hour later?
Ganelon: I'll be around at the same time as always.
Wen: I might be 5-10 minutes late, but that should work.
Frezak (GM): This is usually the sort of time I'm looking at stopping.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Wen: it's pretty long even if you take away an hour >.<
Apheori (GM): And we have to wait a month for Ellemerr?
Bah.
Frezak (GM): We: Sunday my game spend 12 hours at a fair.
Wen: Apheori: I _would_ appreciate it if we spent less time going insane and trying to become sane again >.<
o_O
Apheori (GM): Wen: It gets worse before it gets better. But you're basically at the bottom now.
Congratulations!
Wen: heh.
Well, on that cheerful note, adios. :P
Ganelon: It was the best fair.
Action, drama, suspense, failed attempts at romance... we had it all.
Frezak (GM): Alchoholism.
Ganelon: A lot of that, yes.
Frezak (GM): Fortunes.
TONS OF PLOT.
More plot than you know.
Apheori (GM): You people and your plots.
Frezak (GM): Maybe.
Wen: So far we've mostly had going to places, becoming insane, not finding very much, and then going back to where we came from.
Minus some sanity.
Frezak (GM): Yeah, Azi told us about the science experiment.
And.
That's about it, i think.
We are shit investigators.
Apheori (GM): Yeah, well, if you all would stop AVOIDING the damn continuation thingies...
Wen: You could like, push us towards them >_>
Apheori (GM): There is a very important something that's supposed to happen and you keep... avoiding them.
Wen: Instead of letting us make the bad decisions that stagnate the plot.
Apheori (GM): Like you're almost there and then you're like, no, nevermind.
Frezak (GM): THEN MAKE THINGS UP.
Apheori (GM): But you're the players! You make decisions!
Wen: You control Rhu! Rhu could know what's going on.
Apheori (GM): And I AM making things up!
Ghuh.
Ganelon: I don't really know that I'm missing important stuff.
Wen: Guarav is almost certainly better at this thing than I am. >_>
Frezak (GM): I let my party cause a willage to be burt to the ground just to get them to advance.
Apheori (GM): You know what?
Fine.
FINE.
Frezak (GM): What?
Apheori (GM): You'll see.
Wen: >.>
I think we should be worried.
Apheori (GM) goes back to choking on her tea.
Frezak (GM): I WAS JUST TRYING TO DO MY JOB
Wen: I mean, I get that the lava lamp thing is important. But... there's no obvious way to interact with it.
Frezak (GM): The finding things out bit, not the digging holes bit.
Wen: I look at the sky and I see an eye staring at me.
Frezak (GM): We could fly into the sky >.>
Apheori (GM): Stop fighting the madness. Embrace it.
Become one with it.
Or something.
Okay, fine, I admit it. I enjoy watching you all lose your minds.
Frezak (GM): I'm being as mad as my character warants.
If you're telling ME I'm not mad enough, WELL.
Apheori (GM): I was kidding.
Wen: I'm not very good at being mad. I think I designed my character to be pretty much in line with my own personality. >.<
Apheori (GM): Your character has done excellently.
Wen: I should have probably made it more caricatured.
It could maybe, I dunno, hook up with a wall.
maybe that'll lead to things
Wen grins
Ganelon: Whoa now.
Apheori (GM): *shifty eyes*
Ganelon: Do you have a plug?
Frezak (GM): The wall will.
Once he gets it in.
Wen: I have more than a plug. I have a 65W power brick.
Apheori (GM): Woah woah woah.
Let's not get ahead of ourselves.
Ganelon: I could intimidate more obstacles if you like.
Apheori (GM): The obstacles love you.
Frezak (GM): Or lust.
Wen: Apheori: it might be a good idea to remind me about this thing on Sunday, if you can remember. >.>
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Wen: Thanks.
Apheori (GM): If I remember.
Wen: Yes.
Or you could play 2PCs >_>
Apheori (GM): Ghuh.
Wen: I'll try to remember, but I'm not too good at remembering stuff a week away.
Apheori (GM): Neither am I.
Wen: I'm off to get dinner. Laters.

Session 4

Mike B.:
rolling 1d6
(
2
)
=
2
Oopsies.
Frezak (GM): WHERE IS MY CHICKEN
Apheori (GM): You want it back?
Frezak (GM): Eh.
It's probably because it's buried.
Right?
Right.
Apheori (GM): Right.
You buried it.
Frezak (GM): I died.
A tree died for my art.
Wen: is Mike B. Radek?
Mike B.: Nah, I'm Mike B.
Wen: Oh.
Frezak (GM): Gan is Radek.
Mike B.: Yeah, I haven't really put together a character yet.
Frezak (GM): ANOTHER PERSON?
's gonna get fun >.>
Apheori (GM): He may wind up replacing someone else who has to... do other things.
Because some people have LIVES for some reason.
Bastards.
Frezak (GM): Bastards!
Bear Soup Guy: Sickening
Frezak (GM): Revolting.
Wen pleads college life
Wen: which means I find something to make myself look busy while getting nothing done
Apheori (GM): Oh, so you've got parties and girls everywhere, do you?
Wen: hahahahahahahaha
hahahahahahahahahahahhaahhahahahaha
Gaurav: Wen: which college?
Wen: very funny Apheori.
Apheori (GM): Well, that is what people sometimes mean when they say 'college life'.
Wen: I'm on exchange at http://uwaterloo.ca/
Apheori (GM): OKAY.
GAME.
I CAN CLOSE OBLIVION AND GAME.
GAME.
Wen: so we're not expecting Gan?
Apheori (GM): GAAAAAME.
Frezak (GM): Gan should be along >.>
Apheori (GM): Make him, will you?
Nevermind.
Frezak (GM): BEHOLD MY DARK POWERS.
Gaurav hides
Ganelon: Beholding.
Frezak (GM): Sooooooo
Apheori (GM): OKAY.
I MADE NOTES.
Frezak (GM): We were going where Radek's madness wanted us to go?
Apheori (GM): I THINK THEY APPLY TO THIS.
Frezak (GM): NOTES?
WHAT IS THIS MADNESS?
Gaurav: Notes?!
Wen: we were in the ship. I think Greibel wants to kill me and vice versa.
We're not at the city yet
that's all I remember.
Apheori (GM): In vehicle. Radek is flying to a city nobody else can see. Greibel and Azir each think the other is trying to kill them. Rhu is behind them, terrified out of his wits, but at least he s not screaming anymore. The Gravedigger was rudely awoken from his nap and isn't terribly happy.
Bear Soup Guy: Oh right, we're all going mad
Wen: positively insane.
Frezak (GM): Oh, we couldn't see this city?
Mike B.: AHYAHYAHBALPLLT
Apheori (GM): Gaurav: You were screaming.
Apheori (GM) points and laughs.
Bear Soup Guy: I pictured we were falling through some sort of void
Rhu: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH
Rhu takes a breath
Rhu: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH
Apheori (GM): Frezak: You weren't sure where he was going and didn't really care.
Rhu: You stopped.
Wen: xD
Apheori (GM): I said WERE.
The Gravedigger: Quiet back there!
Or i'll turn this ship around!
Rhu stops screaming
The Gravedigger: And put you in holes!
Apheori (GM): Snrk.
The Gravedigger: Thank you.
The Gravedigger tries to resume his nap.
Apheori (GM): Yeah, Gravy hit Rhu a few times to get him to shut up.
Are we all on the page now?
Rhu makes sure the escape pods are still around
Wen: more or less I believe
Greibel continues dancing around behind Gravy to have protection from Azi
Apheori (GM): Gaurav: Did you read what happened?
Ganelon: I remember this well enough.
Frezak (GM): We're in a flying convertible, no?
Apheori (GM): Right.
And Radek is flying and he just landed on something invisible.
Well, maybe not on. Above or next to.
Frezak (GM): DAMMIT.
I SHOUD HAVE BROUGHT PAINT.
gallons and gallons.
Apheori (GM): You still have a bucket of something.
Don't you?
Greibel HAD a bucket of paint, but then he upended it on his head.
Wen: when was this?
Frezak (GM): I don't have any buckets.
Apheori (GM): Guess you dropped it.
Ganelon: I have valuable liquid materials best not wasted on stuff like this.
That's about it.
Bear Soup Guy: I have dried paint stuck to my head
Frezak (GM): How can you say that?
We dont know what the stuff IS.
Apheori (GM): Radek can see the place, though. He doesn't need paint.
Frezak (GM): Right now the carshipthing is just hovering.
As far as we know.
Ganelon: I'll land it.
Frezak (GM): "we" being non-Radek peoples.
Wen: is this the city?
that we can't see?
Apheori (GM): Well, landed is hovering with this thing.
Wen: or somewhere else
Apheori (GM): This is it! Probably.
Wen: Okay.
Ganelon: Wait, what?
Apheori (GM): Radek sees a city like the one you left, but smaller and more beat up.
Ganelon: What happens when you turn the vehicle off?
Apheori (GM): But it's SHINY.
You park it in thingies.
But it still floats.
IT STILL FLOATS.
Unless it's down for maintenance.
Bear Soup Guy: Magnets
Apheori (GM): Magic.
Frezak (GM): SMSU.
Bear Soup Guy: Magicnets
Ganelon: Rrrrright then. Radek will step out of it like the grump he is.
Wen: SMSU?
Frezak (GM): Science/Magic/ShutUP.
Wen: Oh.
Apheori (GM): Everyone: Radek is standing on nothing.
The Gravedigger: Oh, come ON.
MOre of this?
Anyone have paint?
Apheori (GM): Azir, Greibel, Rhu: d20
Gaurav: o.0
Aziraphale:
rolling 1d20
(
12
)
=
12
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20
(
5
)
=
5
Rhu:
rolling 1d20
(
2
)
=
2
Frezak (GM): OH GODS.
JUST JUMP.
FLyyyyyy
Wen: Apheori: fewer sanity checks today please >.>
Apheori (GM): Rhu is still utterly panicked, Greibel and Azir are sane again.
Or as sane as they ever are.
Wen: \o/ do I still think he's trying to kill me?
Apheori (GM): Which in Greibel's case is saying almost nothing.
Nope.
Wen: excellent.
Apheori (GM): And Greibel got distracted by a cloud.
Aziraphale looks at Greibel and suddenly gets an urge to hug him
Greibel: Wheeeeee
Apheori (GM): But Wen, sanity checks are how you see reality!
Frezak (GM): I'm gonna watch Radek.
Wen: uh, so Radek's just standing outside and not telling us anything?
Apheori (GM): Apparently.
Ganelon: Why would he have cause to tell you anything?
Aziraphale: so Radek, did you just go out for a quick smoke in mid air?
Frezak (GM): if I watch him long enough, he'll do something interesting.
Wen: well, all of us aren't doing anything, for one thing
Frezak (GM): You're done squabbling?
Apheori (GM): Rhu: d20
Radek: No, I'm standing on solid ground. And I don't smoke.
Frezak (GM): Let's all stare in silence;
Apheori (GM): And roll well or I'll hurt you.
Aziraphale: What solid ground?
Greibel: You should start, man
It's awesome
Rhu:
rolling 1d20
(
10
)
=
10
Wen: XD
Radek: Undoubtedly.
The Gravedigger: I don't see any ground.
The Gravedigger pokes the 'ground' with a shovel.
Aziraphale: I mean, this is quite impressive and all.
Frezak (GM): My second-best shovel, in case.
Aziraphale: or is this one of the perception issues again?
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You come to your senses, see Radek standing on nothing, and... well...
Aziraphale grumbles
The Gravedigger: Maybe we can find fancy glasses.
Wen: what's the result of the shovel poke
Apheori (GM): Gravy: The shovel clinks on stone.
Frezak (GM): Hmmm.
Aziraphale: augh damn it.
Aziraphale gingerly steps out side
Apheori (GM): You are standing on nothing.
Don't look down.
Greibel: Pala-dude, perception is just the gateway to the soul, man
Aziraphale resolutely looks straight ahead
Frezak (GM): I LEAP ONTO THE NOTHING.
Carefully.
Apheori (GM): You hear a loud crack as you land.
The Gravedigger: That wasn't me.
Radek: I would propose linking our consciousnesses together, except that would likely drive all of us insane for completely unrelated reasons to our present dilemma.
Wen: what's our perceived height?
Apheori (GM): High.
The Gravedigger: I don't want your consciousness. It's sad and grumpy.
Radek: Hmph.
Yours isn't exactly a prize worth fighting for either.
The Gravedigger: It's beyond price.
Aziraphale: This isn't sustainable. Even if we were standing on solid ground, we can't do anything when we can't see what's really around us.
Greibel: You know what I do when I want to see what's really around me?
Aziraphale: No. And I don't really want to know.
Aziraphale grumbles some more.
Greibel: Your loss, dude
Frezak (GM): brb
Greibel smokes some drugs, I think
Apheori (GM): The sky is watching you all like a wretched abyss.
Wen: (likewise. bathroom)
Bear Soup Guy: YOU CAN'T ESCAPE THE SKY IN THE BATHROOM
IT'S WATCHING YOU THERE TOO
Ganelon: I'll refrain from trying to offend it this time.
Apheori (GM): As much as I hate to push you all, have you considered getting the magic guy to do some magic?
Frezak (GM): TO disillude?
I don't think we have.
not right now, at least.
Gaurav: Divine magic? Divine magic I can do.
Apheori (GM): Actually, any magic might tell you more at this point.
Wen: back
Apheori (GM): Like that thing Gravy wanted to do to the invisible room...
Frezak (GM): What, paint?
Or breaking it?
This stone is crackly >.>
Ganelon: Well, I've assumed that messing with dimensions is a bit beyond the magic man on his own.
Wen: wait, which of us have magic abilities?
Frezak (GM): All of us?
Ganelon: Of a sort.
Apheori (GM): It worked before.
Wen: uhh, what's mine?
Ganelon: Radek is the Arcane guy.
Divine.
Frezak (GM): You have divine stuff.
Wen: oh, in that sense, okay.
Gaurav: I can do a decent Religion or Insight check, if anybody thinks that'll help. I can do a very bad Arcana check. Not sure what "divine magic" maps to in D&D terms.
Apheori (GM): You hear creaking noises.
Ganelon: Well, alright. Let's try to stabilize shit here.
WITH MAGIC.
Wen: I can do an insight check I guess?
I have +8
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+10
(
16
)
+10
=
26
Wen: or +3 perception
Bear Soup Guy: I can check for animals and trees and stuff?
Wen: Apheori: Can I heal Rhu?
Ganelon: IS THE WORLD FIXED?
Apheori (GM): Gan: A couple of buildings fall down.
Ellemerr: Dig out the whole magic invisible floor! Dig as if you could even see what you were doing!
That's my suggestion. xD
Wen: out of combat
Apheori (GM): Everything shimmers.
Ganelon: Oh, uh... not nearby, I hope?
Apheori (GM): Not immediately nearby, no.
Wen: bah, I'll do a perception check
Frezak (GM): Is that a shimmering, or thing that he can see that we can't shimmer?
Aziraphale:
rolling 1d20 + 3
(
1
)
+3
=
4
Wen: >.<
Apheori (GM): Everyone sees the shimmering. And hears the rubbling.
Frezak (GM): Rubbling?
Apheori (GM): Buildings. Turning into rubble.
The Gravedigger: RAdek? Can you do something so we can see what's going on?
Because it sounds like holes.
Radek: I'm trying.
Wen: Apheori: Can I heal Rhu? Or does it have to happen during combat?
Apheori (GM): Azir: You hear a horrible high-pitched whine.
Aziraphale winces
Apheori (GM): Like the very fabric of reality is at odds with... you.
Ganelon: Standard rules say no, out of combat is totally fine. But he can also heal himself out of combat.
Apheori (GM): Wen: Okay, he's healed.
Wen: okay.
Rhu: Thanks!
Aziraphale Does anyone else hear that noise?
Wen: uh, -/me
Apheori (GM): Azir: no.
Aziraphale: Does anyone else hear that noise?
Rhu: Yes, we all hear the rumbling.
Apheori (GM): You all hear the rumbling and creaking, which is getting more insistent...
Also the sky is a massive hole and it wants to eat you.
Aziraphale: There's this... high pitched noise. Real unpleasant. Looks like reality is mucking about.
Apheori (GM): And you're standing on nothing.
Greibel: d20
Greibel: This reminds me of a nursery rhyme.
Ganelon: Well, I tried to make the floor visible.
Greibel: Oh wait, no, it was a movie. Never mind.
The Gravedigger: I think I'm gonna get back in the floating car thing now.
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
5
)
=
5
Aziraphale: ye-ah. Might be a good idea.
Apheori (GM): Greibel senses a squirrel he can't see.
Frezak (GM): and brb again >.>
Apheori (GM): Buildings are collapsing.
Greibel: hmmmm
Apheori (GM): The place is rumbling and cracking.
Aziraphale: Guys, let's get back in the ship.
Ganelon: Well, that sounds like a good idea.
I'll do that.
Gaurav: Can we feel the rumbling through the invisible thing we're standing on? Or do we just see/hear it?
Aziraphale reenters the ship
Ganelon: Let's not stick around near the collapsing building.
s*
Wen: I suggest investigating the sky
last time someone said we should just charge towards it >.>
Bear Soup Guy: Words no one has ever said before
Without smelling heavily of wine in an alley
Apheori (GM): The sky seems... lower.
Unless anyone says otherwise, you all get back in the car-thingy.
Rhu reluctantly gets back in the car-thingy
Apheori (GM): The shimmering is also much more intense.
Greibel: I miss my tree, man
Greibel gets back in
Radek: So if you don't want to land on the clearly visible city, which is now admittedly collapsing, by the way, where are we headed?
Aziraphale: Let's check out the sky?
Apheori (GM): Almost as if in answer to the question, reality collapses in on itself, and everything goes knurd.
Frezak (GM): KNURD
Also still not back.
Greibel: Woah
Ellemerr: Knurd :3
Greibel: I haven't seen knurd in ages
Apheori (GM): Azir's and Greibel's word are the last things anyone hears before falling unconscious.
words.
Apheori (GM) grumbles.
Ganelon: Yes, words.
Wen: uh, so game over? >.>
Frezak (GM): REROLL
DIBS ON MONK
Apheori (GM): Nope.
Not over.
Wen: well, considering we're unconscious... nothing we can do, is there?
Apheori (GM): IT'S JUST BEGINNING.
Gaurav: o.0
Apheori (GM): Sorry, I'm panicking.
This part was supposed to be important and I may or may not have planned it out but I can't remember.
So I'm trying to make something up. Give me a moment, will you? >.>
Aziraphale twiddles his thumbs unconsciously
Bear Soup Guy: Moment granted
Apheori (GM): Is there like a check or something to roll to wake up?
Frezak (GM): Not really.
Gaurav: We could roll initiatives to see what order we wake up in.
Frezak (GM): We could Constition checks.
*constitution.
Gaurav: Or just keep rolling d20s until someone rolls high enough to wake up, then wakes everybody else up.
Frezak (GM): With the tougher dudes being better able to recover from being KO'ed.
Apheori (GM): Everyone roll a d20 with your constitution modifier tacked on.
Frezak (GM): Awesome!
rolling 1D20+4
(
6
)
+4
=
10
gaaaaah
Gravy loves naps.
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20+4
(
1
)
+4
=
5
Frezak (GM): DAMMIT GREIBEL
Gaurav:
rolling 1d20+1
(
17
)
+1
=
18
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Wen: which one is constitution?
Frezak (GM): Con.
Apheori (GM): Yours is 1.
Wen: okay
Aziraphale:
rolling 1d20 + 1
(
20
)
+1
=
21
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
4
)
=
4
Wen: \o/
Frezak (GM): I AM SO SLEEPY.
Apheori (GM): Okay, Azir wakes up and looks around.
Aziraphale looks around
Apheori (GM): You're in the car in a dusty clearing in some treeless. The car-thing is no longer hovering for some reason.
Aziraphale shakes the other people
Frezak (GM): MR CAR NOOOOO
Apheori (GM): The others are in it as well, or around. Rhu is also stilling.
The other people besides Greibel wake up. Greibel seems to be having a nice dream, mumbling about a tree.
Gaurav: stilling?
The Gravedigger: Aw. He's like a little angel.
Apheori (GM): stirring
I CAN TYPE.
Aziraphale: Alright, so here we are. Lost once again. Lovely.
The Gravedigger: He could probably do with time to recover from the drugs.
Apheori (GM): There's a slight breeze.
The Gravedigger: So... this is.... uh....
Aziraphale: I hope you've all had a nice nap.
ESPECIALLY YOU, GRAVY.
The Gravedigger: It was great.
I feel so refreshed.
Aziraphale kicks Greibel (not too hard)
Rhu coughs in the dust
Apheori (GM): You actually do feel refreshed. Better than you've been, at least.
Radek grumbles loudly.
Gaurav: at the dust? because of the dust?
Apheori (GM): At, I think.
Radek: You were in the dirt.
Just so we're clear.
Frezak (GM): I'll go pick up and put Radek on his feet if he isn't.
Ganelon: Am I still metallic?
Apheori (GM): HE HAS REASON TO GRUMBLE.
Yes, and your metalic is dirty.
Ganelon: At least it's still there.
Apheori (GM): It tried to eat the dirt.
Frezak (GM): Stupid magic metal skin.
Rhu checks to see if we're still in a treeless, dusty clearing
Ganelon: Well, I'll do what I can to become clean.
Apheori (GM): I meant leafless trees.
I can't type. o__o
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+11 perception check
(
4
)
+11
=
15
Frezak (GM): Leafless? Dead?
Apheori (GM): Apparently. It's too warm to be winter, and everything is just... dry.
You could check them, though.
Frezak (GM): I'll go smack a tree and see if it's dead.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: Everything seems alarmingly normal, if a bit dead. The sky is a sky, the ground is solid, there are dry leaves and grasses around...
And apparently you landed in an old campsite.
Rhu beams
Rhu: Guys. GUYS. Reality seems to be not completely messed up for the moment.
Rhu carefully pokes at the ground
Apheori (GM): Frezak: The tree drops a bunch of dust on you. It seems to be dead.
Frezak (GM): Hmm.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: It's a ground.
Rhu: GUYS! SOLID GROUND!
Frezak (GM): Campsite? Any.. camping /things/ ? tent, fire....
Radek: Yes, but where are we?
The Gravedigger pats Rhu.
The Gravedigger: yes, that's ground.
I know ground all right.
And that, there. Is ground.
Rhu: GROUND.
Rhu lies down on the ground.
Apheori (GM): Old firepit with some logs, some stakes for a tent, an old journal, some shiny things in the grass...
Frezak (GM): SHINY THINGS.
EXAMINE SHINY THINGS.
Wen: (I'm totally still following along)
Apheori (GM): Shiny things are some bottles of what might be potions or liqueurs and a bong.
Frezak (GM): HMMM.
Could I identify the bottle contents with a... nature check?
that bong better be a +1 bong.
Apheori (GM): Try it.
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+8
(
13
)
+8
=
21
brb
AGAIN >.>
Apheori (GM): The primary liquid in them appears to be alcohol. Beyond that you can't really tell what they are.
A couple are empty, but they're dry and don't smell like anything.
Aziraphale looks at the sky
Rhu: (getting off the ground) I think we should check if we can establish radio contact with the ship that brought us to this benighted planet, headquarters, and any living soul again, just in case something changed while we slept.
Apheori (GM): The sky is a sky, broad and blue and cloudless. Standard world, healthy.
It magically fixed itself!
Radek: I wouldn't be so quick to assume we're still on Sarathi.
Ganelon: Still, I'll give the computer a shot.
Aziraphale: Good point. Any way to check?
Would be nice if we got teleported out of that hellhole anyway.
Rhu: Ah. Well, maybe we're somewhere with a better class of reality, then.
Ganelon: Any connection?
Apheori (GM): No connection.
Rhu: Have you tried hitting it?
Frezak (GM): I will take all the bottles.
Radek: Have you tried getting an education in computer engineering?
There's no connection.
Ganelon: GRUMPY
Apheori (GM): Snrk.
(To Greibel): Wake up and pick up the bong.
The Gravedigger: I could hit it for you!
I understand all that learning gave you noodley arms.
I'll help!
Greibel starts waking up
The Gravedigger readies shovel.
Greibel stumbles into the place w'e're at
Aziraphale: Gravy, I don't think that's the best idea.
Wen: does whatever radio device I have on me have any reception?
The Gravedigger: Aw.
Greibel: Hey, what happened dudes?
Oh sweet. Anybody got dibs on the bong?
The Gravedigger: magic!
Rhu: Maybe Greibel can turn into a swarm of birds and check out the area for us?
Apheori (GM): You've still got reception to the other ones.
And none of them are identifying as 'sexy' anymore.
Greibel takes the bong
Wen: Good.
Aziraphale: I sort of like this reality.
I second the suggestion that Greibel scout the area.
The Gravedigger: This is fine hole-dirt.
Greibel: Okay
Apheori (GM): You could dig a hole!
Gaurav: Er
Apheori (GM): And bury the car-thing!
Gaurav: Wait
Greibel: (in a serious super-hero voice) Hold my bong!
Apheori (GM): I mean...
Rhu picks up the old journal and flips through it
Aziraphale reverentially holds it
Frezak (GM): I will begin digging.
Greibel unceremoniously poofs into a flock of dirty birds
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You don't recognise the script. Which is odd, because you've at least seen quite a few...
Radek: Wait, what are you digging a hole for?
Apheori (GM): It also isn't very good handwriting, though, so that might have something to do with it.
The Gravedigger: You never know when you need a good hole.
Rhu: Hey ... does anybody recognize this script?
Aziraphale: I'll read it.
Frezak (GM): I'll peek over Azir's shoulder for a glance then get back to digging.
Apheori (GM): Azir: It looks... familiar. Like you should know what it is. But you don't.
Wen: oh damn, I thought I could roll
Apheori (GM): Frezak: It looks like really bad handwriting,.
Frezak (GM): And by peek I mean loom.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+2 history check to see if anything about the script recalls any past civilization or culture.
(
2
)
+2
=
4
Apheori (GM): Nope.
Rhu tries looking at the journal upside down
Frezak (GM): SMOKE IT IN THE BONG
Ganelon: I'll check out the car.
Apheori (GM): Wen: You can roll, you just...
Er, wait, no, you could succeed.
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Apheori (GM): DO IT.
Aziraphale: So this looks familiar, but I still can't read it.
Apheori (GM): I keep mixing up the holy people.
Bear Soup Guy: But I'm birds!
Apheori (GM): No, wait, I still mixed them up.
BIRDS!
Wen: also, did the ship turn into a car? or is that just alias car ship
Frezak (GM): Wen is super holy.
Ganelon: I'm calling it a car.
Wen: totes
Apheori (GM): Car-ship.
Frezak (GM): It was always a flying convertible car.
Apheori (GM): Future car.
Convertible thingy.
Frezak (GM): future
Apheori (GM): This wasn't SHIP.
Gaurav: Yeah, but this isn't the ship named SHIP we landed in, right? This we picked up outside the mall?
Wen: indeed
Frezak (GM): This car does not make sandwiches.
Wen: so what does Greibel see?
(To Greibel): As birds, you scout the area. There are a lot of trees, some hills, a village in the distance that looks like some sort of weird hippy commune. Everything is pretty dry.
Apheori (GM): Azir, Rhu: I'm sorry, I mixed you two up. It looked familiar to Rhu, Azir has never seen anything like it. I apologise for this.
Greibel needs to get back and say.
Rhu: Huh. This looks ... familiar.
Wen: Hmm.. this is odd. So it's from this planet, but I can't read it and Rhu can.
unless it isn't from this planet! -cue dramatic music-
Apheori (GM): I never said he could read it.
Wen: oh right.
Apheori (GM): Just that it looked familiar.
Wen: where's Rhu from anyway?
Ganelon: Why is the car no longer hovering?
Apheori (GM): Sarathi gets a lot of vacationers.
Good question!
Bear Soup Guy: SORRY I HAD TO DO A THING SUPER QUICK
Rhu puts away the old journal
Greibel turns back to elf
Greibel: There's a village off in that direction. Looks like some kind of commune sort of place. Other than that, lots of trees, birds, hills. Mostly unpopulated by any kinds of people.
The Gravedigger: What about things that aren't people?
Radek: Mostly?
The Gravedigger: Giant lizards?
Magic bugs?
(To Greibel): There wasn't much else. Too dry?
(To Greibel): Some caves, though. Might be some there.
Rhu: Greibel: Any bodies of water around?
(To Greibel): You didn't see any water...
Greibel: There were some caves, might be some people or animals in there.
(To Greibel): MADNESS.
Greibel: Not much for non-birds
No water anywhere nearby
Frezak (GM): So how common is .. teleportation in our future universe?
Apheori (GM): Very common.
Frezak (GM): So being dumped across planets is nothing spectacular?
Apheori (GM): Got devices in every town to jump pedestrians between them, and gateways between many major worlds...
But being dumped without a device? That is odd.
Gaurav: I don't think we're carrying teleporters, though? And walking to that commune is just asking for a random encounter.
Apheori (GM): Wizards might do that sort of thing, but that's wizards.
Ganelon: Never call Radek a wizard, incidentally.
Frezak (GM): Well i'm totes hyped for going to the willage.
Maybe the want some holes dug.
Aziraphale: I second the motion to go to the village.
The Gravedigger: To the willage!
Greibel: Willage!
Ganelon: Hold up.
Frezak (GM): Comes Gravy's voice from his hole.
Rhu: We should see if we can get the ship named car working first.
Ganelon: Again, what's wrong with the car?
The Gravedigger: Oh, all right.
Ganelon: Yeah, that.
Rhu: That would help us get to the village and more importantly get away when everything goes awful.
Apheori (GM): It's just sitting there.
The Gravedigger resumes holecrafting.
Apheori (GM): I take it Radek investigates?
Ganelon: Yes.
Apheori (GM): Roll an investigate!
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+10
(
5
)
+10
=
15
Apheori (GM): Apparently it's off.
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Wen: hee
Ganelon: ...I turn it on.
Apheori (GM): It turns on, but only partly lifts.
Like only the front.
Frezak (GM): It's a giant Tenser's disk.
Wen: o_O
Frezak (GM): Oh.
Rhu: Oh!
Maybe something's wrong with the rear ... disk?
Radek climbs out of the vehicle.
Bear Soup Guy takes his bong back
Bear Soup Guy: Thanks for holding this, man
Fragile, you know
Radek: Turn this thing over on its side so I can take a look.
Frezak (GM): CAN DO.
Strength check to flip the car.
rolling 1D20+4
(
1
)
+4
=
5
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+6 Nature check to see if I can guess what kind of monsters might live in this area.
(
2
)
+6
=
8
Frezak (GM): NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
MY POWERRRRRR
Faaadinnnnnngggg...
Gaurav: In Soviet Russia, car flips you.
Wen: uhh, should I give it a go?
Frezak (GM): I pulled a muscle >.>
Or several.
Aaaag my lats
Apheori (GM): That.
Radek: Hmph.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You suspect birds.
Ganelon: I'll try it!
Frezak (GM): I'm gonna hide in my hole.
Ganelon: With my fantastic old-man strength!
rolling 1d20-1
(
7
)
-1
=
6
YEAH
Frezak (GM): You can sit in my hole if you want.
Aziraphale:
rolling 1d20 + 4
(
1
)
+4
=
5
..
Guys, I don't think we're going to be able to do this.
Apheori (GM): You, you all failed, and Azir broke a nail.
Aziraphale: ow.
Frezak (GM): What the hells.
Aziraphale: Let's try the village first, maybe?
Frezak (GM): Maybe... turn the engine off and THEN flip it?
Bear Soup Guy: Should Greibel still SMOKE THE SCRIPT
Aziraphale: NO.
Frezak (GM): SMOKE THAT SHIT MAN
Bear Soup Guy: Damn :(
Frezak (GM): INGEST THE WORDS
INHALE TRUTH
Aziraphale: Uhh
Aziraphale eyes Gravy
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Frezak (GM): Gravy is sad.
Aziraphale: Guys, I think he's going insane.
Frezak (GM): His one talent is that he's strong. And he failed at that.
Radek: No. No, no, no, no. We are not talking about sanity again.
Rhu: Maybe there's a panel at the back of CAR that opens? Don't mechanical things usually have panels?
Radek: Let's go to the village.
Apheori (GM): You could... try again.
Ganelon: Another roll?
Frezak (GM): I'd love to try again.
Gaurav: I could try. Is it just 1d20 + STR?
Wen: yeah.
Bear Soup Guy: Strength modifier I believe
Wen: what are we going to do if we fix it though? We'd still go to the village.
Frezak (GM): But we could go to the willage in STYLE.
Gaurav: hmm, my strength is zero, so I should probably go last. Greibel: can you change into any animal big enough to carry the car?
Frezak (GM): I can try again, GM?
Math gives me chances of not FUCKING IT UP
Gaurav: And we aren't leaving the only thing from Sarathi we still have at a campsite where we might not be able to find it again.
Apheori (GM): You can always try again unless things break.
Ganelon: My strength is -1.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+4
(
1
)
+4
=
5
GODDAM IT
FUCK THIS GAME
Bear Soup Guy: That's a good question Guar
Frezak (GM): GRAAAAAH
Ganelon: Pfffaaahahahah
Bear Soup Guy: What are the rules on that?
Frezak (GM): FUCKING NEUTRONIUM CAR
Gaurav: Well, that and this light fixture I picked up.
Bear Soup Guy: My strength is balls but I can turn into like a bear or a dragon or something
Rhu tries
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+0
(
13
)
+0
=
13
Frezak (GM): It doesn't change your stats, BSG.
Apheori (GM): You feel like you almost can and are sad.
Bear Soup Guy: Okie-dokie
Apheori (GM): Rhu: Also you saw a panel.
Rhu: A PANEL!
Rhu points at the panel hoping someone who understands technology can do the technology thing
Aziraphale pokes Radek
Ganelon: Panel science?
Frezak (GM): I'm sobbing in my hole.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+10
(
12
)
+10
=
22
Greibel: Hey man, don't be bummed.
It's a pretty big car thing, y'know?
Apheori (GM): Gan: You get the panel off, find the controls all look fine, and realise the back thing is just full of dirt.
Gaurav: In my head, I see Gravy as being twice as tall as the car is long.
Aziraphale: Looks like a job for Gravy.
Gaurav: well, not twice
but just absurdly too big for this car
Frezak (GM): Gravy is about... seven feets of tallness?
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Like Shaq in a Miata
Radek: Gravy, come get this dirt out of here.
Frezak (GM): HOW.
Bear Soup Guy: Also brb starting some noodles
Frezak (GM): WITH MY GIANT HANDS?
Apheori (GM): Well, he could stick his hand in it. But that would probably be a terrible idea if the car is on.
Frezak (GM): Also that.
Radek: Dirt and violence are your two specialties, aren't they?
Apheori (GM): Of course Gravy might not realise that second bit...
The Gravedigger: If you want that car to work, these giant hamhocks won't help.
Will my shove fit in that hole? i don't think so.
Apheori (GM): Also I want noodles too.
Radek: Useless!
Apheori (GM): MAgic.
Frezak (GM): I don't deal in precision stuff.
I MAKE HOLES
I DO NOT FIX CARS.
The Gravedigger sobs in his hole some more.
Ganelon: I'll do it myself, then.
With the car off.
While grumbling about unreliable urban vehicle designs.
Apheori (GM): You get the dirt out and turn it back on and it just works.
Rhu: YAY!
Frezak (GM): I want to check my backpack to check that everything is how I last left it.
If dirt got teleported into the car bits, who know what else has moved.
Apheori (GM): As a side note, Greibel tries smoking some plants he found. This has no real bearing on anything, but that's what he's doing while this is going on. And while the noodles are preparing.
Wen: so do we take the car-ship to the village?
Frezak (GM): Can i roll Nature to identify psychotropic plants?
Ganelon: That's the plan.
Frezak (GM): ANd make sure to steer him away from them?
If I roll enough things I won't get a 1.
Apheori (GM): Your stuff all seems to be there, although you're not sure where the package of fertiliser came from...
Frezak (GM): A package?
Future or old times package?
Apheori (GM): You've got a tub of fertiliser. Like... normal technical chemical fertiliser.
Frezak (GM): Any distinctive writing on it?
Apheori (GM): It's labelled 'all-purpose plant food'
Frezak (GM): Hmmm.
The Gravedigger: hey, check your stuff, guys.
Aziraphale examines his inventory
Ganelon: Anything out of place?
Apheori (GM): The dragon parts you collected don't seem to be dragon parts anymore.
They seem to have broken down.
Wen: You get a pack of fertilizers. You get a pack of fertilizers. EVERYONE gets a pack of fertilizers.
Apheori (GM): Still probably useful, though.
Greibel has a pocket full of fanged peas.
The Gravedigger: GAH
PEAS
Gaurav: Unless I missed something, the only thing Rhu picked up recently is the half digested light fixture and the old journal. Are they still fine?
Wen: I thought we were out of the crazy reality? :/
Apheori (GM): Gaurav: Aye.
Greibel found the peas by reaching into a pocket and pulling out a hand covered in them. Not attacking, just... sticking and chittering.
Frezak (GM): PLANT PLAN.
Save them peas, man.
Save them for dire times.
Greibel: Right on
Greibel puts the peas back in his pocket
Rhu: Those are some cool peas.
Greibel: Shhhh, your time will come little ones
Apheori (GM): The peas come off without complaint.
Aziraphale: I'm more bothered by the fact that everything seemed sane for a moment, and then bam, fanged peas.
Nothing against the peas themselves, just..
Rhu checks the box of fertilizer to see if it has any ammonium nitrate in it
The Gravedigger: i'm sure everything will sort itself out.
Gaurav: Are fanged peas a savory snack on the planet Rhu is from?
Oh, I meant: Rhu looks at the text on the box, not performs some sort of on the fly chemical analysis
Apheori (GM): Urea nitrogen.
12% nitrogen, but not that.
Aziraphale: I think we should head to the village.
Apheori (GM): The one you mentioned.
Frezak (GM): TO THE WILLAGE
Apheori (GM): Fanged peas ain't a snack anywhere... civilised.
Ganelon: Willage?
Gaurav: Before we head to the village, we should double-check that we're all healed up and fighting-ready.
Frezak (GM): WILLAGE
Wen: I think we are.
Frezak (GM): I haven't taken any damage.
Wen: Rhu was the only one that ever got hit by the chicken, and he's healed.
Apheori (GM): Someone broke a nail at some point.
Gaurav: Sweet. Sounds like we're ready to go!
Wen: yes, me, but I didn't realise that hurt HP
so uh, I heal myself?
(To Frezak): How do I throw a pack of starved wolves at you?
Rhu: (darkly) I don't like communes. Or villages. Or _people_.
Rhu gets back into the car
(From Frezak (GM)): You say... "You come across a pack of starved wolves." ? O.o
Gaurav: BTW: Wikipedia says that urea + nitric acid = explosive, so keep your eyes peeled for nitric acid I guess.
Greibel: I LOVE communes
And people are alright, but I prefer animals
Bear Soup Guy: :O
(To Frezak): Yeah, but the encounter... thing...
Wen: uh, we float over to the village?
(To Frezak): Then again if you're flying that's not an issue.
(From Frezak (GM)): Um. I'll find some wolf tokens and some wolf monster sheets? Then slide the party to another map - oh, right.
Gaurav: Who's driving?
Frezak (GM): Who has best perception?
Apheori (GM): How do you get Gravy out of his hole?
Wen: can't he dig himself out?
Frezak (GM): I'll just climb out, sulkily.
Apheori (GM): Aw.
Ganelon: Aw, I was going to suggest flooding it with fertilizer.
Rhu: Animals are alright, I guess. Cats are pretty cool, even when they're not gods.
Aziraphale: cat gods are terrible
Gaurav: Rhu has +11 perception, and anybody within five squares of me gets a +1 to their perception.
anybody -> allies
Bear Soup Guy: sexy
Frezak (GM): Well that puts me at... 9.
SO YOU CAN DRIVE
Radek: Gods, animals, people... I'll stick with my machines.
Rhu: Everybody in?
Aziraphale: Gravy?
Rhu squints at the road and drives in whatever direction Greibel said the village was.
Frezak (GM): yeah, i'll get in back.
Greibel: Road trip!
Ganelon: Wait, there's a road?
Apheori (GM): Not really.
Rhu: Plain trip!
Frezak (GM): Dirt!
Greibel: DIRT!
Apheori (GM): A bit of a path, but not wide enough to fit the car, and it doesn't really go anywhere.
So you, like, fly over the trees or something.
Frezak (GM): HAHA, SUCK IT, TREES
Rhu: Huh. This is a cool car.
Apheori (GM): Roll your thingies.
Perceptions.
Things.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+8+1
(
6
)
+8+1
=
15
Wen: +8+1?
Greibel: r 1d20+9+1
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+7+1
(
10
)
+7+1
=
18
Frezak (GM): +1 from Rhu?
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+11 perception
(
2
)
+11
=
13
Wen: oh
Aziraphale:
rolling 1d20 + 3 + 1
(
11
)
+3+1
=
15
Rhu: There are some trees over here. I think.
Frezak (GM): We need a new driver.
Apheori (GM): Y'all see trees. And dirt. And rocks.
And a sinkhole over there.
And more rocks.
And some strange shiny things with a deformed bird on them.
And more dirt. And trees. And rocks.
All the trees are dead.
Rhu: Should we investigate the sinkhole?
Or the deformed bird?
Frezak (GM): Deformed bird?
Also shiny things.
Apheori (GM): It's very large, missing a bunch of feathers, and has too many limbs.
Frezak (GM): Ew.
Wen: any shimmering or other signs of deformed reality?
Apheori (GM): Not that you see.
Wen: Good.
Rhu: Phew.
Aziraphale: Greibel: can you see what's up with the bird?
Frezak (GM): Nature checks on the bird?
Apheori (GM): ..sure.
Bear Soup Guy: NATURE CHECKS
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+8
(
17
)
+8
=
25
Ganelon: I know nothing about mutants.
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20+11
(
18
)
+11
=
29
Apheori (GM): Radek should do a science check.
Gaurav: Woah, nice rolls.
Frezak (GM): DAMMIT BSG
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS UPSTAGE ME
Ganelon: ...Do I still need to?
Apheori (GM): I guess not.
Bear Soup Guy: =D
Frezak (GM): Between us, we know all nature.
Gaurav: BSG is more nature than man.
Er, elf.
Bear Soup Guy: Together we could conquer the dirt world!
Apheori (GM): It's a mutated bird, like a second or third generation after a bad radiationing thing.
...words are hard.
Frezak (GM): Hmmm.
Does it seem agressive?
Apheori (GM): You're not close enough. You could get closer.
Frezak (GM): Likely to be a problem if we examined the shiny stuffs?
Bear Soup Guy: NATURE EYES
Apheori (GM): It seems like it could be guarding the stuff.
Frezak (GM): Hmmm.
Have radek fire a warning shot?
Ganelon: Just to make noise?
Aziraphale: I suggest we go to the village first. I mean, even if we do all our observations, we can't really understand any of what happened without more information.
Frezak (GM): AND LEAVE THE SHINIES?
...
Fine.
Greibel: Looks like he isn't going anywhere, I guess
Rhu: I agree with Azi, although it might be fun to have Greibel turn into a flock of angry birds and try to distract the mutant bird for us.
Aziraphale: It'd achieve nothing.
Rhu: ...
Frezak (GM): A flock of sexy mutant birds.
Apheori (GM): XD
Greibel slicks his hair
Aziraphale: If the mutant birds attack, we could do that.
Rhu: We could also just drive this car into the bird. It belongs in a museum!
Frezak (GM): Well, at least in a jar.
Aziraphale: You're like the British and the pyramids way back when people still lived on earth.
"This belongs in a museum!"
a jar. Even worse.
Gaurav: I work in a museum. We have many jars.
Wen: do they have interesting stuff in them? :P
Apheori (GM): Octopi.
Squids.
Slugs.
More slugs.
Wen: My character is like, uptight and grumpy and not very likeable. Of course it's going to be a dick about it.
Apheori (GM): But anyhow.
Wen: damn slugs.
Apheori (GM): Your character is awesome.
Wen: so let's continue to the village?
Apheori (GM): So what'll you do?
DRIVER. DO SOMETHING.
Wen: I vote village.
Rhu: I vote village.
(but wait to see what the others say before actually driving us there)
Greibel: I vote village but that bird is so cute
Frezak (GM): sure
Ganelon: Works for me.
Rhu drives us to the village
Apheori (GM): It's evening. There are some folks standing around listlessly, but then one spots you approach and points. They stare up in shock and wonder.
The Gravedigger: HELLO PEOPLE.
WE COME TO DIG HOLES.
Radek: No we don't!
Rhu keeps the car hovering 20 feet above the shocked people.
Apheori (GM): The people startle at Gravy, and especially his voice, and cower in fear.
The Gravedigger: I'm trying to reassure them.
Everyone likes holes.
The Gravedigger waves
Aziraphale: Hallo.
Bear Soup Guy: Shall we roll for their trust or...something?
They'll probably like me, being the outdoorsman
The villagers back away in fear.
Frezak (GM): Just rain drugs on them.
Apheori (GM): You're hovering 20ft up.
Aziraphale: Hello, people, do you have food? I'm hungry.
Apheori (GM): Of course that might be a little intimidating.
Rhu: Who's the most charismatic person here?
Ganelon: Someone insight these people.
I'm terrible at it.
Aziraphale:
rolling 1d20 + 8
(
12
)
+8
=
20
Gaurav: Rhu's CHA is -1 so he's keeping his big mouth shut.
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20+9
(
4
)
+9
=
13
Frezak (GM): So's mine >.>
Bear Soup Guy: Yeah we all suck at people
Gaurav: DM: did you just create a character named "The villagers"? Or can you make actions with arbitrary subjects?
Frezak (GM): It's a Journal entry.
Apheori (GM): It's not a commune, or hippies. It's a village of what appears to be an agrarian society, except they don't look very well off. They look all afraid and hungry and hopeless.
Frezak (GM): So.... both >.>
Apheori (GM): Yup.
Wen: do they understand us?
Apheori (GM): They don't seem to.
And now most of them have run away inside.
Wen: can I have a babelfish?
Frezak (GM): Most?
Apheori (GM): I don't think Radek knows how to make those.
Two villagers remain.
But they don't seem inclined to actually do anything with y'all way up there. They're just watching.
Frezak (GM): Drop down.
I have an icebreaker.
Radek: What are they so afraid of?
Aziraphale: Us, I think.
The Gravedigger: Maybe they've never seen such a beard.
It might be scary for them.
Radek: Fear isn't exactly the first emotion I would experience, looking at this group as an outsider.
Aziraphale: if you were an agrarian society with no experience of space-age technology, wouldn't you be afraid of a hovercraft?
Radek: Maybe pity.
Rhu: An agrarian society? Do you suppose they'd be interested in fertilizer?
Wen: I should know if agrarian society exists (and if so, where) on Srathi, shouldn't I?
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Wen: so?
Aziraphale: I don't think they wouldn't know what to do with it
Apheori (GM): There was a proposed hippy commune at one point, but it never actually happened.
Frezak (GM): But these are wood huts, right?
Apheori (GM): The huts are wood and stone.
Aziraphale: -don't
Apheori (GM): But roofed with thatch.
Wen: So there aren't supposed to be agrarian societies on Sarathi?
Apheori (GM): Right.
Aziraphale: Guys, this is.. odd.
Frezak (GM): Surely handmade structure are strange to us?
Apheori (GM): And Sarathi is usually pretty lush, too.
Yes.
Aziraphale: I don't think places like this exist anymore on Sarathi.
The Gravedigger: Those houses were made by hand.
Apheori (GM): They are.
The Gravedigger: Ya don't see those anymore.
Apheori (GM): Some people do it, like you and your shovels, but it's odd.
Aziraphale: ...so we're either somewhere no one has ever been, on another planet, or in another dimension.
Ellemerr: "Aw, this is so quaint!"
The Gravedigger: Is this a Ren fair?
Aziraphale: This does not please me.
Rhu: One of us needs to speak with them. Does anybody have a Charisma over zero?
Apheori (GM): You forgot time travel.
Frezak (GM): I'm at -1.
But I have a trick.
Aziraphale: Oh, or we travelled back in time.
Frezak (GM): Lemme down!
Aziraphale: Thanks voice-from-nowehere.
The Gravedigger: I have an idea, guys.
Apheori (GM): Azir: I'm the voice in the back of your mind because you're crazy.
The Gravedigger: Lower us down slowly.
Rhu lowers us down slowly
Frezak (GM): I'll get out, making exaggerated, slow moves.
And clearly put my shovel and shield into the car.
And pull out one of the booze bottles from my pack.
Uncork it, take a swig.
Apheori (GM): One of the ones from the campsite?
Frezak (GM): And then advance to one of the dudes with a bottle in hand.
yes, those.
You said they were booze, right?
Apheori (GM): Alcohol, yes.
It makes you feel funny. Lighter.
Greibel: That's a great idea!
Poor people love booze!
Apheori (GM): One of the villagers eyes you suspiciously, but also approaches.
The Gravedigger: Radek, you're smart. Come with me.
And try to not look too grumpy.
Radek: If this doesn't work I'm breaking out the science.
Frezak (GM): I'm gonna offer him the bottle.
Apheori (GM): They're human. These two are an older man and a woman who looks like she could be his mother.
Ganelon: You know that I still look like a chrome statue, right?
Frezak (GM): Shit.
Well I'm a horned giant.
Rhu watches Gravy's attempt to communicate with the communists and is clearly impressed.
Apheori (GM): The man accepts the bottle, eyes it with slight confusion, but also takes a swig.
Frezak (GM): We'll work.
Ganelon: Fine, fine.
Radek steps out of the car and follows Gravy.
Apheori (GM): The man says something, but you don't understand it.
It seems like a question.
The Gravedigger: Now that we have his attention, Radek. Do some smart gesture figuring out stuff;
Apheori (GM): The woman watches Radek.
The Gravedigger: I'll get you a stick so you can draw things in the dirt.
Keep an eye out for trouble, guys?
Frezak (GM): DO SOME SMART THINGS NOW
Apheori (GM): Guys in car: You realise the rest of the village is watching out the windows.
Frezak (GM): Because I did not think this through.
Aziraphale keeps an eye out
Ganelon: What do you want me to do, draw pictograms?
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+11 perception check to see if I can spot any potential danger, paying particular attention to the side of the village opposite that where Gravy and Radek are.
(
1
)
+11
=
12
Frezak (GM): That sounds about right.
GORRAM 1's !!!
Apheori (GM): The woman says something as well, and the man looks back, worried. She shrugs.
Rhu: You have absolutely no idea whatsoever.
Wen: Can we get Greibel to turn into something that understands them?
Ganelon: Why would you rely on me to communicate with simpletons?!
Frezak (GM): Because intelligence.
To find ways to conery concepts.
Via shitty mediums such as gesturing.
Aziraphale: Guys, if we went back in time, or to another planet, or to another dimension, this might well be a "normal" world as far as these folks are concerned.
including the deformed bird
Rhu: Ask them if they know the way to the nearest city?
Apheori (GM): The man tries another greeting.
Aziraphale: just different stages of evolution.
Villager: Enry?
The Gravedigger: Sorry, I'm not familiar with your words, Mr farmer.
Villager: Vosals. Acandorai tir.
Villager gestures around to the village.
Radek: What do we want from them? We aren't going to get any kind of complex information like this.
Certainly not with a stick.
Aziraphale: Ask them where the city is
Rhu: Greibel: can you do a nature check to look for any effects of radiation on the villages?
Aziraphale: gesture tall buildings
shrug
Greibel: A stick can be more telling than you might think, man
Aziraphale: point places
Greibel smokes from the bong a little
Aziraphale: that should do it
Rhu: Show them the tablet computers I hope we still have?
Greibel: Radiation is nature?
The Gravedigger: Well you come here and do gesturings!
Aziraphale exits the car and goes forth
Aziraphale gestures as described
Greibel: Okay, well
Check for radiation!
rolling 1d20+11
(
19
)
+11
=
30
Apheori (GM): The woman glares at Azir.
Frezak (GM): You have Geiger eyeballs.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: Sure, you detect some low levels of something or other.
Like it's faded and almost gone, never really was a whole lot.
Greibel tells that to Rhu
Greibel: Meh
Wen: could it have been just not thing out of the ordinary?
Greibel: Probably bananas
Apheori (GM): The woman starts gesturing and chanting, casting a spell you don't recognise.
Wen: places _do_ have background radiation, even on roundworld
Frezak (GM): MAGIC?
Rhu: Hmm. I wonder why the birds seem so much worse affected than the people?
Aziraphale makes a gesture for keeping evil away
Apheori (GM): MAgic.
Gaurav: WOAH. Who has the best arcana? Can you figure out what she did?
Mine's a measly +2
Aziraphale: I can shield us with my divine thingy right?
if it's bad
Apheori (GM): A soft light explodes around her and permeates the area, and as it does, a small woman appears next to Greibel.
Greibel: Jinkies!
Ganelon: That would be me.
Apheori (GM): The villager woman looks surprised.
Gaurav: Is Greibel still in the car?
Amadi: What time is it?!
Ganelon: Not the woman.
The person with the best Arcana.
Apheori (GM): Amadi is the woman next to Greibel in the car.
You can try to figure out what happened, yes.
Gaurav: Rhu is also in the car.
Rhu jumps in his seat
Rhu: (looking at Amadi, surprised) Who's that?
Aziraphale: I think you should try to talk to her. This one at least appears to understand gobblygook
Amadi: Who's who? Who're YOU?
Greibel: Who made you?
Amadi: I did!
Did I?
Maybe?
What time is it!
Frezak (GM): I'm gonna stalk over to her and pick her up.
Aziraphale goes back to the car
Aziraphale: do you know these people?
The Gravedigger: DO YOU LIKE HOLES?
Greibel: Are you friendly or unfriendly?
Apheori (GM): The villagers back away.
Wen: Gravy, don't try to impress ladies. 'tis not the time.
>.>
Frezak (GM): Shh.
I have the biggest holes.
Ellemerr: ... Did Gravy just pick up Amadi.
Frezak (GM): Yes.
Apheori (GM): Apparently.
Frezak (GM): Not brutally, but so that they're face to face.
Greibel: Ah man, come on...
Amadi: Do I like holes? Do I like holes... hm. Did I fall through a hole? I think I'm friendly until proven otherwise. The holes are neutral.
Frezak (GM): I'll put her down.
Aziraphale: Do you know the people outside?
The Gravedigger: Hmmm.
I have my eye on you.
Aziraphale: Do you recognise a ship-car-thing?
Amadi stumbles a little at being put down and takes some uncertain steps. Then she looks around, trying to take in the whole... rather messy scene.
Villager hails to Amadi, something in his own tongue, but she recognises it.
Rhu: (to Amadi) I am Rhu, an avenger serving the great god Hazz'ridan. Where do you come from?
Aziraphale: What did he just say to you?
(To Amadi): Something like "Hail, who speaks our tongue, are you with these demons?"
Amadi ignores the party of lunatics and goes over to the villager, looking up at him. She's not the biggest of ladies.
(To Amadi): And you definitely know the name Hazz'ridan.
Amadi: What time is it?
Frezak (GM): What lunatics?
Ellemerr: Do you have to ask?
Aziraphale stares at Amadi, quite offended
Frezak (GM): I'll look up into the sky.
What times DOES it look like?
Villager responds something short but polite, and nods to her.
Wen: "there are two suns, one of them appears to be setting and the other is rotating around a point"
...knowing Names >.>
(To Amadi): "Evening, but I'm afraid I can't say more specific.
Gaurav: hah
Apheori (GM): Normal sky, evening, some wisps of high clouds.
Amadi: Oh. Really?
Amadi looks at the sky.
The Gravedigger: Evening time!
Villager: En.
Amadi: Well. Okay!
(To Amadi): "Yes."
The Gravedigger: Teatime! or dinner!
Depends if you're British or American.
Amadi: I don't think I know these demons. Are they demons? One of them know Hazz!
The Gravedigger: DInner!
DO we have sandwiches left?
The Gravedigger checks his pack for sandwiches.
Villager: Hazz?
Amadi turns away from the villager and looks at Rhu.
Apheori (GM): You have sandwiches and some snacks.
Amadi: Hazz'ridan. You don't know him. Don't worry about it.
Radek: I'm not a demon.
Rhu: Do you mean Hazz'ridan, the great God of Dead Ends? I worship him.
Amadi: I don't think you know him. Do you know him?
Wen: brb
Villager: Azrai tocoma. Ira san?
Rhu: he is my guide and my protector.
(To Amadi): "Names differ. Should we?"
(From Amadi): You tell me >.>
Amadi: Guide. Hah. Hah... Good one.
(To Amadi): They know him as Vitoi.
Greibel: If you count getting people miserably lost as protection...
Rhu: It is in becoming lost that we find ourselves.
The Gravedigger: He's not the most hope-filled fellow, that's for sure.
Yeah, that sort of gibberish.
The villagers confer.
Rhu holds his amulet/implement worshipfully.
The Gravedigger: Stick to holes, I say.
Very simple things.
None of these Zen things.
Apheori (GM): The villager woman seems to recognise the implement.
Amadi turns back to the villager, pondering. "Vitoi, maybe? I mean, if it's evening... it might be?"
Villager: En, Vitoi. Asa cae.
The Gravedigger: Anyone want a sandwich?
I have a few more bottles of hooch?
(To Amadi): That one.
(To Amadi): I like how he didn't realise those were potions.
Apheori (GM): Alcohol-based, granted.
Oops.
Amadi: I want a sandwitch!
Apheori (GM): Wrong chat.
Amadi runs over to Gravy.
The Gravedigger hands Amadi a sandwich.
The Gravedigger: Anyone else?
I think I have ... little... cake packet things.
Rhu: (to Amadi) Do you also study the ways of the maze?
Ellemerr: What are the sandwitches like?
Villager: A gona?
Frezak (GM): Probably home-made sandwiches. Since I never packed any SHIP sandwiches.
Wen: Who are these people? Where are we?
Aziraphale: err
Who are these people and where are we?
Amadi: Yes, a sandwich. This guy has... he calls them sandwiches.
Frezak (GM): In this future, probably the only sandwiches ever.
Apheori (GM): A few villagers step outside their homes. They're still not sure what's going on, but they seem reassured at least somewhat.
The Gravedigger: I don't have enough sandwiches for everyone.
Villager: Nana gona vos sacai. Eren iri?
Frezak (GM): In these days when people eat nutrient pastes and pellets and crap.
Amadi takes a big bite of the food-stuff and turn to Rhu, shaking her head. "Ah 'now 'im. 'E's fun."
(To Amadi): They do not call them gona. What are they?
Rhu: Fun ... yes, I suppose he is. (beat) I suppose that depends on what you find fun, though.
Wen: is Amadi ignoring my questions on purpose? >.>
Frezak (GM): MOST LIKELY.
Wen: dammit. Rhu, you ask her.
what with your common god and crap.
Amadi chews and swallows and answers the villager, "They speak sorta funny, I guess. They're sandwichy enough. Mmmm..." She takes another bite, bigger this time.
Gaurav: Btw, it being 2:40am here, and me having to be up in five hours to check in to my flight out of India, I'm going to have to start making I-should-leave-soon noises. But I'll stay til 3am at least.
Frezak (GM): Gah!
TIMES >.>
Apheori (GM): Bah.
Wen: timezones suck.
Apheori (GM): EVERYONE KEEP GOING.
Wen: no one knows that more than I do.
Frezak (GM): I CAN ONLY DO SO MUCH WITH SANDWICHES.
Apheori (GM): Amadi: Do something crazy!
Ellemerr: Amadi is not ignoring anyone on purpose... right now. But sandwiches might be more interesting. >.>
Rhu: Sandwich lady: do you know where we are? My party and I appeared on this planet not an hour ago and we don't know where we are.
The Gravedigger: We were eaten by a hole.
(From Ellemerr): Do I know where we are? xD
The Gravedigger: It was the sky.
Amadi: ... I think there might have been a hole... at some point...
(To Ellemerr): Sort of? I mean, you know the name of the world, and the name of the universe. But you may not know that it's this at the moment, or...
(From Amadi): So in other words, not yet, at the very least.
Rhu: We were on Sarathi, and quite frankly a single hole would have been an improvement.
(From Amadi): I'm totally giving Frezak half a convo, ain't I.
Ganelon: Hold on.
How old does Amadi appear to be?
(To Ellemerr): You could proudly announce that this is Arling Tor, where Kyrule reigns king.
(To Ellemerr): You do know the name Sarathi. It shows up everywhere. A planet of holes.
Frezak (GM): Sounds like a kid so far.
Amadi: Sarathi! Yes, there would be holes...
Apheori (GM): She looks adult, but not any particular age.
Aziraphale: You mean this isn't Sarathi?
Gaurav: She referred to Hazz'ridan in a way that suggests that she is pally with gods. She might be one herself.
Amadi: This isn't Sarathi! Less holes.
Radek: Oh, marvelous.
The Gravedigger: And the sky isn't giving us looks, either.
Radek: Where is this, then?
Amadi: This, is... uh...
The Gravedigger: And no fish.
you noticed that, guys? No fish!
Just a ... mutant bird thing.
Rhu: A hole less present is one I am grateful for, except for the carefully engineered holes that my friend The Gravedigger here constructs for us.
Oh man, yes! Zero fish is the right number of fish.
The Gravedigger: Thanks, Rhu.
I take it back.
You're okay.
DAMMIT.
I should have buried the fish.
Sorry, giant fish.
Amadi looks everything over again, looks hesitant for a bit, then shrugs and announces proudly that "This, my friends - or demons - or whatevers - is Arling Tor!"
Gaurav: Didn't the giant fish vanish of its own accord? Or were there other giant fish I missed?
Frezak (GM): It vanished?
Well if it did then he forgot >.>
Bear Soup Guy: I think we were all just too insane at the time to know whether it was there or not
Apheori (GM): Maybe.
Gaurav: Oh, no, my bad -- from the logs: ""The fish you saw before is now completely rotted, as though it had been sitting out for days, perhaps weeks. There is a horrible, partly dry puddle around it."
Ganelon: Anyone here know what that is?
Gaurav: alas, poor fish.
rolling 1d20+2 history check to see if I know anything about Arling Tor
(
16
)
+2
=
18
Greibel: Arling Tor!
Apheori (GM): Arling Tor? Nope.
Gaurav: It's probably one of the lesser Tors.
Frezak (GM): It's a Torlet.
Gaurav: Anybody else want to have a go at remembering what Arling Tor is, or should I ask Amadi?
Greibel: (to Amadi) So you guys don't know stuff about space travel and other planets and stuff per chance, do you?
Frezak (GM): I wouldn't bother.
We've been told our history is pointless.
Amadi looks at the villager guy and mutters, "I sort of doubt they're demons. They don't smell very demonic to me. More... dirty."
The Gravedigger: It's the price to pay for hole science.
Greibel poses proudly at the mention of dirtiness
Frezak (GM): HAH
Villager asks Amadi what they are.
Rhu: We have had encounters with fish, my lady.
It was old fish.
The Gravedigger: Except when it wasn't.
Greibel: Older afterwards
Amadi: Planets? Space? Uh. It's... out there, mostly? I'm sorry, there was a hole, I... I think it maybe got stuck in here.
Amadi gestures first at the sky and then bonks her head.
Ganelon: Here's something I should have asked almost immediately. What race(s) are these people?
The Gravedigger: A hole in your head?
As a hole expert, that does not sound great.
Villager: They're human, Amadi is an elf, and you look really weird to them.
Frezak (GM): I assumed 'human'.
Villager: Oops.
Greibel: Maybe holes work different here
Greibel shrugs
Apheori (GM): THAT.
Frezak (GM): Thanks, villager!
Apheori (GM): SORRY.
Ganelon: Well, I imagine Radek and Gravy would look weird to anyone right now.
Gaurav: hahaha
Radek: Hold on.
Apheori (GM): Yup.
Frezak (GM): Well, Gravy doesn't look weird to you guys.
Radek: You don't know anything about space-faring technology. Does *anyone*?
Apheori (GM): Well, they know what he is.
(To Amadi): You know quite a bit, though what you share is up to you. If you even realise you know it.
(To Amadi): Sorry, I'll stop throwing stuff at you now.
Amadi sticks her lip out in a pout. "I didn't say I didn't know things, I said it might be stuck in a hole! I totally know space-travel and technology and stuff."
Apheori (GM): Priestly people! You could try praying for help, you know.
Rhu: Sandwich lady: I'm afraid none of us have ever heard of Arling Tor. Can you tell us more? Where is this planet?
(From Amadi): Having stuff thrown is good.
(To Amadi): Okay.
Ganelon: I mean, I look like a 1950's interpretation of space-faring life. Sleek, metallic, and devoid of a realistic propulsion system.
(To Amadi): The planet is in arling tor.
Frezak (GM): Sleek?
Aziraphale says a prayer to Carriya
Frezak (GM): I picture withered old man.
Apheori (GM): Gan: XD
Amadi: Arling Tor is in Arling Tor. Duh,
Gaurav: I don't know that I can pray for help, apart from doing a Religion Check, which is more fore information on a particular god I think. Plus, I fear Hazz'ridan would disapprove of people asking for help. He seems the walk-the-path-of-lifeuntil-you-reach-the-dead-end-alone kind of guy.
Ganelon: Now spray-paint that man chrome, Frezak.
The Gravedigger: How do you know these people's languages?
Ganelon: Now it's from the '50s. And space.
Apheori (GM): You can pray for whatever you want.
The Gravedigger: Don't suppose it's in a book or something?
Apheori (GM): But... yeah, whether the god will answer is another matter.
Ellemerr: You might have noticed that you understand her as well as they do. She's not actually speaking their language. I think. As far as you can hear.
Amadi shrugs. "I like words."
Frezak (GM): I'm still asking :p
Huh.
Ganelon: http://rookery9.aviary.com.s3.amazonaws.com/12635000/12635454_fd5f_1024x2000.jpg
Like this.
This is what your science person is covered in.
Along with dirt, blood, and maybe some glass shards.
Gaurav: Rhu is also going to hold off on praying since the last three things he wanted -- a spacecraft that worked, a planet that didn't keep vanishing, and fewer fish -- have been given to him, and he doesn't want to push it.
Ellemerr: Fancy
Frezak (GM): HAH
Gaurav: Ellemerr: damn! we should have noticed that
Bear Soup Guy: Radek isn't half as attractive though :P
Ganelon: I don't know what you're talking about. Ladies love the beard.
Ellemerr: Especially since the villagers actually spoke a language and everything... yes you should xD
Rhu: Sandwich lady: you ... wouldn't know the way to the nearest city, would you?
Amadi: I would!
Rhu: Where are you headed? Can we give you a ride?
Greibel: Ooo, is it Sandwich City?
Wen: I pray to Carriya for some direction on what to do next.
Gaurav imagines a "New York, New York" type musical number for Sandwich City
Wen: that's what religion is for? isn't it? so you don't have to be personally responsible for your decision >.>
(okay I'm just being a dick, ignore me)
(To Amadi): Deralon is to the east. Large trading hub, but hit hard by the cataclysm.
Apheori (GM): Wen: Yes.
Ganelon: Religion is mostly to know about religions and perform godly rituals.
Gaurav: In my last D&D game, we got a scroll which conveniently pointed us in the right direction when we got lost. Handy!
Amadi: I am headed to... Midnight, maybe. Or tea-time. I wouldn't mind a ride, I guess. Or company. I've missed company.
Ganelon: Prayer counts as the latter, though it doesn't necessarily do anything.
Apheori (GM): Wen: You get nothing.
Wen: that was snarking about how some christians practice their religion (or buddhists or whatever)
Just as I expected.
The Gravedigger: Where have you been?
Rhu: Is Midnight a city on this planet? I don't think our car is capable of space travel, but maybe you could get a ship to Midnight when we get to the nearest city?
(To Amadi): Heeee.
Radek: Right now, a way to re-establish communications would be ideal.
Amadi: .... Noooo, midnight is not a city. It's a time. You know time, right? And I've been here and there. Not for a while, though. I think. There was a hole. I remember morning, but it wasn't anything to write home about.
The Gravedigger is confuddled.
Apheori (GM): In the meantime, the villagers seem to have decided you all don't mean harm. Some are still watching, and others go about their business... watching.
Frezak (GM): ALWAYS WATCHING
Rhu: I fear our morning has been nothing if not memorable.
Aziraphale: in a bad way.
Apheori (GM): The man who'd tried to greet you goes back to his porch as well.
Aziraphale mutters darkly
Amadi: Oh, can we trade?
Frezak (GM): I'll give him the rest of the bottle and pat him on the back.
Gaurav: Do we have anything else we want to do in this village, or should we jet out for the nearest city? I want to get back into radio contact with headquarters and figure out if we're still getting paid given that we're no longer in the planet we were sent to investigate.
Radek: Trade what?
Apheori (GM): He gasps for breath as a result of the pat, but takes the bottle.
Amadi: Mornings!
Gaurav: We still have a box of fertilizer to trade with them if anybody's interested in, I dunno, village handicrafts or something.
Aziraphale: The last city we tried to land at didn't get well
Radek: I'm afraid our morning could be considered damaged goods.
As in, dimensionally damaged.
The Gravedigger: It had fish in it.
Greibel: Speak for yourselves, dudes
I found a perfectly good bong
The Gravedigger: And undead chickens.
Aziraphale: Fair point.
The Gravedigger: But it's evening now, Greibel.
Greibel: Oh, right
The Gravedigger: That's an Evening Bong.
Greibel smiles widely
Greibel: It sure is!
The Gravedigger: You had paint this morning.
Aziraphale: Oh, say, Amadi, do you know why we saw deformed birds and shiny things and sinkholes some way away from here?
Rhu: It is indeed evening, and I'd like to be somewhere with decent food, a clean bed and possibly television before nightfall, hopefully with some news on whether I still get paid or not.
Greibel: At least the paint was a cool color
Same as the bong, really
Amadi: Oh, hah. You really are funny, mister. I see why Hazz would like you.
Frezak (GM): I'll take this time to get my shield and shovel back from the car.
Rhu: (to Greibel) The cat goddess -- Lokshmi? -- was pretty cool, too. (to Amadi) Do you know of Lokshmi?
(From Amadi): I need info to answer Azir! *flail* Unless you want me to talk gibberish at him, because that's always an option.
Greibel: Oh yeah, Lokshmi, groovy chick
Amadi: Oh, sure.
The Gravedigger: Uh, gods.
Come, Greibel.
Let us search for drugs.
(To Amadi): There was a cataclysm. Bad things. New. Shouldn't be happening, except it has always been happening, but it only started with the blue-eyed gal. Rhi. Sarathi. The world's end, but it already ended and it didn't yet and that is why there are now cats.
(To Amadi): You can use any of that.
Greibel: Oh right on!
Greibel tags along
Frezak (GM): THE HUNT FOR DRUG PLANTS BEGINS.
Greibel: Hi-ho, hi-ho
(To Amadi): Lokshmi is a demonic kitty.
Greibel: It's off to drugs we go
Frezak (GM): I'm an enabler and I don't care.
Gaurav whistles along
Radek sighs deeply.
The Gravedigger: ~~And all the boys come to my drug yard.~~
Wen mutters
Apheori (GM): o_O
Gaurav: Should we maybe set up camp here, and, I don't know, chat with Amadi late into the night mayhaps?
Amadi chews her lip and turns to Azir. "Well, uh... that would probably be the cataclysm. It keeps happening although it shouldn't and is completely new and it was that gal with the blue eyes who started it all and now there are cats.
Aziraphale mutters too
Bear Soup Guy: XD XD
Aziraphale: Gal with blue eyes?
cats?
Lokshimi?
she's behind this?
Wen: lokshmi? lokshimi?
Amadi: Yes. Uhm, no. I dunno. Cataclysm. 'S real bad.
Frezak (GM): Lokshimi sounds like a fish dish.
(To Ellemerr): Ahahahahah they think Lokshmi is behind it...
Wen: Lokshmi sounds like a malicious goddess
(From Amadi): Does Lokshmi even have blue eyes? O_o
(To Amadi): The blue-eyed gal was Rhi. She's... something else. Keeps appearing out of Sarathis and destroying universes.
(To Amadi): Lokshmi has green eyes, apparently.
Rhu: All cats are malicious, wonderfully so.
(From Amadi): I gathered as much, it was more, does they have the faintest reason to suggest Lokshmi. I'm not going to correct them because funs.
(To Amadi): Shiny.
Aziraphale: I'm not a fan, regardless. If she's behind this, look what position she put us in.
Wen: if Guarav needs to go, maybe we should stop? or just have him tag along again?
Gaurav: 3:15am guys. I should go, but next week I should be back in the US, weather and immigration allowing, so I might be able to stay for longer.
DM: I guess now that we have another divine character in the party, I am less immediately important?
Amadi: Honestly, if you were on Sarathi you can't really blame anyone.
Gaurav: Wen: heh, nice timing on that reminder.
Apheori (GM): Gaurav: No, you're both important now.
Radek: Does that mean you know what happened to the planet?
Gaurav: Gulp.
Amadi: Besides, Lokshmi's eyes -
Amadi falls suddenly and unexplainably asleep.
Amadi snores loudly, once, and then disappears as though she were never there.
Aziraphale: O_O
Frezak (GM): Great.
WAIT FOR MIDNIGHT.
Wen: uhhh, so, do we stop? or keep going?
(From Amadi): Because I should sleep. :P
(To Amadi): Heh.
Rhu looks around slightly panickily to make sure that nothing else is vanishing
Wen: ooh clever. yes. When's midnight?
Frezak (GM): Later?
(From Amadi): And the game should stop to let others sleep.
Frezak (GM): >.>
(To Amadi): Quite.
Wen: /me pokes the DM
Ganelon: ARE we going to stop, or what?
Apheori (GM): We probably should.
Rhu: Has the sun moved at all since we got to Arling Tor?
Apheori (GM): This way we're all here to figure out a time.
Gaurav: Yes that is wise
Apheori (GM): Rhu: It went down.
It's now night.
Ellemerr: Well that was fun. Except there are way too many of you people. You're just everywhere. So many.
Ganelon: I am hoping to be busy tomorrow.
So that would be an unsuitable time for me.
Apheori (GM): Gaurave: When next can you?
Wen: I have class before I can do after 4PM UTC on Tue / Thur, after 6:30PM UTC on MWF and pretty much any sane time on weekends.
Aziraphale: err, - "I have class before"
Wen: dammit
Gaurav: I'm going to be flying through to Wednesday evening, but I might be able to do Thursday before evening CT (jet lag allowing) and I can probably do Friday before evening CT.
Saturday through Monday are tricky for me this week, since I have a lot of work to catch up on after the holidays, but once that's over I can commit to a weekly time slot.
sorry. my time slots are always the weirdest.
Bear Soup Guy: I don't have anything planned for this week at the moment, although I'm probably gonna try to do some things around the house and some other odds and ends most of the weekdays
Gaurav: How does this time (1800 GMT) Friday work for everybody?
Frezak (GM): I think Gan is busy on fridays?
THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU HAVE TOO MANY PEOPLE
Apheori (GM): Wen's classes are problematic, but we could kill off his character in a blaze of horror.
Frezak (GM): I WARNED YOUUUU
Wen: :D
I mean
>.>
Apheori (GM): See?
We could!
Wen: if you're going to do it, find a convenient point
Apheori (GM): Pity, though. I like his character.
Frezak (GM): THE ORACULAR SLUG SPOKE
AND YOU DID NOT LISTEN.
Wen: I can still keep up for a week or two, I think.
Bear Soup Guy: A God brought him to us, maybe a God brings him back later
Ellemerr: This is why I have a poof-in-poof-out character. Who is obsessed with time. It just... fits.
I'll be gone till the month ends, as you know.
Bear Soup Guy: Ah, clever
Wen: or you could just kill me off in the way characters die in H2G2
i.e. cheerful irreverence. Guy died in a mysterious blender accident. It was quite tragic and took two weeks to clean up.
Gaurav: what if it was a self-cleaning blender?
Wen: that might just have been it.
Frezak (GM): SCIENCE
Apheori (GM): So Gan can't do fridays?
Frezak (GM): I'm not sure.
Bear Soup Guy: This Friday is most likely bad for me too
Gaurav: What about Saturday? Not this Saturday, because I'm flying again, but I can make myself free most Saturdays I think.
Wen: the wind. oh man the wind.
Gaurav: most Saturdays -> this month/semester, I mean
Bear Soup Guy: Saturdays if we start sometime around the time we've been starting, I can do
Usually I'm busy during the later hours
Frezak (GM): I can do saturdays.
Wen: likewise, minus some trips to the laundry room.
Apheori (GM): Saturdays work for me.
Frezak (GM): At least this month.
Wen: so saturday next week seems to be fine for everyone? anything before then?
Apheori (GM): Don't suppose we could all do next monday in the meantime...
Bear Soup Guy: Next monday looks fine for me at the moment
Ganelon: Sorry, I stepped out.
Fridays and Sundays, I'm busy with other D&D stuff.
Any other day or time is pretty much okay.
Wen: I could. But starting at 20 or 30 past would make it easier for me to get lunch. Or you could just start playing and I'll tag along and show up when I do.
the latter's probably easier really. Less pressure for me too >.>
so next monday at the same time...?
Apheori (GM): So monday next week, and after that we can try to do saturdays as a regular thing?
Wen: sounds fine to me for now.
Ganelon: Sure.
Bear Soup Guy: Sounds good to me
Gaurav: Any chance we can do Monday after working hours? I feel like it'd be a bad idea to show up late for work on my first working day back in school :-/
Wen: what's working hours for you?
Gaurav: after 5pm MT? I usually keep working after that, but nobody else is in lab so I can slack off for a bit possibly.
Also: how does Tuesday 1800 GMT work for people? Because that's right between two classes for me.
Otherwise, forget it, I'll write down Monday 1800 GMT in my calendar and try my darndest to be there
Wen: I can do that.
Ganelon: If it's tomorrow? Nah.
Frezak (GM): sure
Wen: tuesday 1800 that is
Ganelon: Otherwise, probably.
Gaurav: next week Tuesday
instead of next week Monday
Bear Soup Guy: Yeah I can do that
Gaurav: oooh
Wen: okay, so that?
Gaurav: DM?
Apheori (GM): Works for me.
Wen: well, that, then.
Gaurav: Yay!
Wen: sweet dreams Gaurav.
sorry for keeping you up
Gaurav: So Tuesday 14th January 1800 GMT and then Saturday 18 January recurring
awesome
no no this is fun! this is a good reason to be up late.
and I can sleep on the plane the day after tomorrow
bye everybody! see you next Tuesday!
Bear Soup Guy: Adios!
Ganelon: See ya.
Apheori (GM): Whoo!
Ellemerr: Sweet nightmares, y'all. I really need that sleep too...
Frezak (GM): Hrmph.

Session 5

Apheori (GM): Cows.
Wild ones.
Frezak (GM): Wild cows?
Wild mutant cows?
Bhramins?
Gaurav: Yes?
Ganelon: I see six names. We should be good to go.
Apheori (GM): HI.
OKAY.
LET'S PLAY.
Gaurav: When last we left our weary band, Amadi had vanished into thin air.
Apheori (GM): So basically y'all are in this village. There's dust everywhere, everything's really dry and messed up, and there was something about a cataclysm. This weird elf girl appeared and disappeared and chattered weirdly about time. It's nigh time, some of you are still in the car, some out. And y'all are tired.
It's been a long... span of time.
Frezak (GM): And we don't speak the same language as the willagers.
Great.
Rhu: I think we should sleep somewhere -- the village if we can convince the villagers, otherwise set up camp somewhere. I don't like the idea of wandering around after dark.
Apheori (GM): Yup.
Ganelon: But they probably don't think you and I are demons anymore, at least.
The Gravedigger: Go make... gestures, then.
Aziraphale: Can't we sleep in the car?
Gaurav: Is it dark enough to see the stars?
Aziraphale: It should offer some protection.
Apheori (GM): Yeah, there be stars.
Gaurav: Can somebody with a good History check see if they recognize any constellations or anything? Mine is +2.
Or maybe that's a Nature check?
Ganelon: I should still have a stick.
And I think I'm on the ground rather than in the car, along with Gravy.
Apheori (GM): I think it's probably history.
Ganelon: That sound right to you folks?
Apheori (GM): Yes.
The Gravedigger: A stick?
Frezak (GM): OOC
What stick?
Apheori (GM): Gaurav: You can roll to recognise them.
Ganelon: Just a stick.
Which you gave me for communicative purposes, that I will now use as intended.
I wish to draw a picture of a bed in the dirt.
Bear Soup Guy: OKAY
I'M READY
Apheori (GM): The villager is sitting on his porch. Get him to come over.
Rhu sits in the car, looking up at the stars.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+2 history check to recognize constellations or whatnot
(
15
)
+2
=
17
Apheori (GM): Bear Soup Guy: Great.
Radek: Hey, uncultured rube!
Radek beckons at the villager.
Wen: Snrk.
Apheori (GM): Rhu sees a bunch of constellations. One of them looks like a large blob.
The villager waves to Radek.
Ganelon: He doesn't respond to beckoning hand-motions?
Wen: Do we recognise the constellations?
I mean, seeing that one looks like a blob isn't very useful
Ganelon: Also, I hope you guys enjoy or are at least indifferent to the grumpiness.
Apheori (GM): You don't recognise them, but you're not really familiar with the angle, necessarily, either.
Azir would be more likely to recognise one, maybe.
Gan: He responded. He just may not have gotten the point.
Ganelon: HMPH!
Radek: Unbelievable...
Frezak (GM): Poor rubes.
Wen: But we're not on Sarathi..
Ganelon: Okay, I'll approach HIM, then.
Rhu: Azir, look at those constellations! That one looks like a blob.
Apheori (GM): Wen: That would be a good reason to not even try.
Aziraphale tries anyway
Aziraphale looks at the sky
Ganelon: And draw another bed in the dirt.
Gaurav: Re: sleeping in the car, I imagine it looks something like this http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-j6yK-6T8H_A/TY-FqtX1LLI/AAAAAAAABIY/Th41SIbF650/s320/Bob%252527s_Car.jpg so I don't think it'd be very comfy
Villager stands as the strange shiny man approaches.
Villager looks at the bed drawing.
Wen: we can pull up the cover thingy
Rhu: D'you know what, maybe if we pitch tent in their village square they'll get the message and invite us in. Or at least get us warm food in the morning.
Aziraphale: I think that's sound. Or at the entrance. I'm not fond of the idea of being surrounded by them.
Villager says something and points toward one of the houses down the road.
Radek turns back towards the car.
Radek: Unless these people are too backwards to understand symbolism, I may have found us sleeping quarters!
Rhu: Do you think they'll worry if we brought our weapons in? I agree with Azir, sleeping surrounded by strange villagers sounds like a bad idea.
The Gravedigger: Nothing is going to make me part with my shovels. And the spades. And the trowel.
Aziraphale: I think we can take our weapons. They aren't likely to recognise them.
Just don't point them at the people.
Frezak (GM): What about your SWORD?
Greibel: What about the bong, man?
The Gravedigger: Of course you can keep the bong.
Aziraphale: I'm taking my sword.
Radek: I've no intentions of sleeping anyways.
Aziraphale: Sheathed.
Radek: I have work to do.
Rhu conceals my maul under my cloak as best I can.
Wen: All work and no sleep makes Radek a grumpy bastard. :P
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Frezak (GM): That's natural talent, man.
Ganelon: He's got so much to do.
Wen: so it is.
Frezak (GM): TO THE INDICATED BUILDING
Rhu puts on the parking brake of the car and takes care not to lock himself out as he leaves.
Wen: TO THE BUILDING.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Wen: is the car strong enough to withstand possible tampering by the villies?
Ganelon: Making a single flask of Alchemist's Fire takes a half-hour.
He really could stay up all night working.
Apheori (GM): Also, I should point out that you all don't necessarily have sleeping patterns like humans (or possibly at all, in Radek's case), but the... events of the past while were a bit... tiresome.
Or something.
Ganelon: WHO NEEDS TO EAT?
OR SLEEP?
OR HAVE MANNERS?
Apheori (GM): Manners?
Ganelon: NOT *THIS* GUY!
Apheori (GM): Right, so you all are outside the building. Do you go in?
Do you send one person in?
Do you panic?
Frezak (GM): GRAVY GOES IN
Apheori (GM): Do you stare at your bong?
Ganelon: Well, I'm going in at least.
Rhu considers panicking, then decides against it.
Ganelon: The two weirdest ones can walk in side-by-side.
Apheori (GM): Gravy: roll perception.
Gaurav: We might want to come up with a standard order to walk around in. For encounter reasons.
Wen: I cautiously stand outside and watch for approaching villagers.
Bear Soup Guy: We might have to fight some bed bugs
Frezak (GM): I HAVE SKILLS SOMEWHERE
Ganelon: That's an easy one, Gaurav.
Frezak (GM): I SWEAR
*rummages*
Apheori (GM): Itś 8.
Ganelon: Gravy in front, then Azir, Rhu, myself, and Greibel.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+8
(
2
)
+8
=
10
Apheori (GM): Roll.
Frezak (GM): gah
Apheori (GM): Gravy bangs his head on the ceiling, which is too short for him to fully stand.
Frezak (GM): STUPID DOOR
I WILL BURY YOU
Ganelon: We're all fairly tough to kill, but Rhu and I are the easiest by far.
So we take the middle.
Gaurav: Perfect.
Rhu walks in after Gravy.
Apheori (GM): Gravy: You realise you're in some kind of bar or something. Several villagers are around at tables and standing with drinks.
Frezak (GM): I'd take more than a goblin-mounted trebuchet to kill Gravy.
Gaurav: Is everybody standing?
Frezak (GM): Shit.
We don't have money, do we?
Apheori (GM): Some are, some aren't. The barkeep is standing behind the counter.
Ganelon: *That* was certainly not what killed Lhoryn.
Apheori (GM): Probably not.
Ganelon: We don't likely have anything these people would consider money.
We'll need something to offer as trade.
Actually wait.
Bear Soup Guy: WE SHALL PAY WITH ROCKS
Apheori (GM): Azir has a pile of treasure.
Ganelon: I DO have a "small pile of unknown currency".
Apheori (GM): Greibel has a pocket full of fanged peas.
Bear Soup Guy: =D
Frezak (GM): I have booze.
Wen: yeah, I have coins.
Rhu: ... we do have a package of fertilizer in the car.
Frezak (GM): I could just pop a flare in here and go crayzay.
Wen: I don't recommend it
Gaurav: ...
Apheori (GM): Snrk.
Gaurav: Pop it. POP IT.
Frezak (GM): WOOOOO I'M A DEEEEMOOOOON
Apheori (GM): Is that what you do?
Frezak (GM): Not yet.
Azir has treasure?
I veaguely remember something about that.
Apheori (GM): Well, everyone's watching you as you hunch over slightly.
Apparently you dented the ceiling with your horn.
Wen: I have coins.
Frezak (GM): I'll wave.
Wen: But do we want to get drunk?
I don't think that's the best idea. >_>
Greibel: Don't get uptight man, they're just jealous cause they're short
Apheori (GM): One of them waves back.
Frezak (GM): MAN WITH MONEY
Apheori (GM): They chatter a bit amongst themselves.
Frezak (GM): GO FORTH
Wen: There's also the possibility that as strange, potentially dangerous people, they'd want to be nice to us.
Frezak (GM): AND SPEND
Apheori (GM): The barkeep crosses her arms and looks at you two irritatedly.
How many of you entered?
Frezak (GM): Only a total bastard would be mean to Gravy.
So, Radek.
Radek: Not a lot of uneca in these parts, I take it.
Wen: I'm not in it yet
Gaurav: I wonder if we could charge people to have their photo taken with Gravy or something.
Ganelon: I'm mean to everyone.
Gaurav: Rhu is inside.
Ganelon: My age entitles me to it.
Apheori (GM): Heh.
Bear Soup Guy: I guess Greibel's in now
Apheori (GM): Okay.
So Azir is standing guard outside. Don't forget him, guys.
Ganelon: Az-who?
Gaurav: What's the lingua franca of this universe again? Is it English? Common?
Frezak (GM): So hes treasure, then?
*he has?
Apheori (GM): iera
Ganelon: If there are multiple languages I'm pretty sure we haven't discussed them at length.
Frezak (GM): From... somwehre that I don't remember?
WHO HAS MONEY
Apheori (GM): That's the common variant.
Wen: I have money. But do you want to spend it here?
Frezak (GM): Well, we're not getting free beds.
Wen: (mmm, an irritable hoarder)
Gaurav: Wait, aren't they a commune? Would _they_ have money? Or maybe the bar is, like, for visitors only?
Ganelon: We found coins on Sarathi.
We don't even know if they're valuable here.
Wen: I give Gravy 10 coins.
Rhu: (to the closest villager to us) Excuse me, do you speak Iera?
Apheori (GM): One of the fanged peas gets out of Greibel's pocket and bounces across the floor.
Ganelon: Then again, these guys don't know that they aren't valuable to US.
Greibel: Woah little dude
Greibel clumsily tries to chase down the fanged pea
Apheori (GM): Roll something with dexterity.
Rhu: The villager says 'Vokri sos."
Greibel:
rolling 1d20+0
(
13
)
+0
=
13
Apheori (GM): Oh.
You fail to grab the pea before it bounces into a villager's lap.
He picks it up and eyes it uncertainly.
Rhu wanders around the room asking everybody who isn't scary, "Excuse me, but do you speak Iera?"
Apheori (GM): It chitters at him.
Greibel tries to act innocent
Apheori (GM): The villager holds out the pea to give it back.
Rhu: People look at you blankly, say some things, etc.
Ganelon: Helpful folks, these willagers.
Greibel: Thanks, village guy
Greibel takes back the fanged pea and puts it in his pocket
Apheori (GM): Then a rather large guy you didn't approach stands up and bangs his head on the ceiling.
Frezak (GM): I'll take the money from Azir and head up to the barladywomanperson
Greibel: You be good, little guy. You're a long way from home.
Gaurav: Greibel: maybe let him have it as a gift? Unless we're short on peas.
Radek: Ah, we have another giant. Go communicate with him by flexing, Gravedigger.
Apheori (GM): The large villager promptly sits down again and everyone else starts laughing.
Bear Soup Guy: Oh, surely
Apheori (GM): The barlady person eyes Gravy.
Greibel holds the fanged pea out to the villager in a show of good faith
Frezak (GM): I'm gonna put the coins on the counter and make... sleeping gestures?
Apheori (GM): "Dena, se?" She says, and points to the group.
Then she holds up four fingers.
Frezak (GM): I'm gonna hold up five.
Since Azir is outside.
And gesture vaguely at the door.
Apheori (GM): She nods, plucks a coin out of your hand, and points to the stairs.
Frezak (GM): Awesome.
I'll give her a bright smile.
Gaurav: Just one coin? That's an honest person.
Wen: I go inside on seeing the exchange
The Gravedigger: hey, guys! Go get Azir.
I got us beds. Or something.
Apheori (GM): She looks started and takes an involuntary step backwards.
Ganelon: HAPPY DEMON.
Frezak (GM): Startled at the smile?
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Frezak (GM): Bah.
This makes him sad.
Apheori (GM): You're huge and you have huge teeth. >.>
Wen: GM: it takes 1 out of the 100 coins I took, out of the 500 we found, for beds for five people?
That's... affordable.
Apheori (GM): Apparently.
Frezak (GM): I have huge teeth?
Well typically a room in 4E is about two silver.
Apheori (GM): Maybe not huge for you, but your entire head is huge.
Frezak (GM): One gold for five beds is fair.
Rhu: Gravy: I think that tall guy there might have been trying to say something to us. You should talk to him, giant to giant.
Frezak (GM): Is said tall guy looking at us?
Apheori (GM): He's glowering at his mug.
Rhu looks the tall guy up and down to see if I can figure out anything about him.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+11 perception check
(
13
)
+11
=
24
Apheori (GM): He's large.
He's muscular.
He's not very happy.
He doesn't look very smart, either.
He might have giant blood in him.
If giants are a thing here.
Frezak (GM): Eh.
Apheori (GM): But you get the idea they might be.
Ganelon: Is it the emptiness in his mug or the emptiness in his soul which is causing him unhappiness?
Frezak (GM): I'm not gonna care about him.
He has no shovel.
Wen: hahaha
Frezak (GM): I'm gonna go upstairs.
Gaurav: He might have one at home?
Apheori (GM): Upstairs!
There are three rooms.
Ganelon: Works for me!
Apheori (GM): They each have a bed which should be large enough for two people.
Except for gravy.
Bear Soup Guy: Convenient
Frezak (GM): DAMMIT
Aziraphale: So Gravy takes a room and I bunk with.. someone.
Radek: Are any of you particularly sensitive to acidic fu- no, never mind. Pointless question.
Apheori (GM): Gravy can take one and have his legs hang off the end.
Frezak (GM): Dammit.
Aziraphale: I bunk with Rhu.
Radek: Greibel can have a bed to himself if I can use the same room.
Frezak (GM): I'll put my legs in my bedroll.
Greibel: Yeah, no problem here
Ganelon: Time to get out MY TOOLS.
Rhu lies down and is asleep before he closes his eyes. His eyes remain oddly open for a few minutes before closing of their own accord.
Greibel gets out his smoking tool before bed
Aziraphale sleeps fitfully
Ganelon: There is, at least, space aside from a bed in these rooms?
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Frezak (GM): I will check over my shovels and gear before going to bed.
Radek does SCIENCE!
Apheori (GM): Each has a bed, a chair, and enough empty space for an old man to do science.
Ganelon: Marvelous.
Apheori (GM): Also didn't you mention something about a possible ritual to understand people?
Bear Soup Guy: Convenient!
Ganelon: I did!
Apheori (GM): Frezak: Your shovels are birlliant.
Ganelon: But I can do that in the morning. It doesn't take long to cast and lasts 24 hours.
Apheori (GM): Your gear is dirty.
Frezak (GM): I'll try and clean my stuff as much as I can before sleeping.
Ganelon: My only concern is that it requires magic stuffs, of which I have a currently small supply.
Apheori (GM): Gravy uses the fork to scrape the fertiliser off everything else.
Gan: You might be able to use fertiliser.
Bear Soup Guy: Good for explosives and SCIENCE!
Ganelon: Oh, I intend to.
Gaurav: Is that our fertilizer from the car? Or is this fertilizer that was already in the room? Like, complimentary fertilizer?
Ganelon: With these computer parts and some fertilizer, I shall create five bombs.
Apheori (GM): That was the fertilser Gravy picked up at some point and wound up in the car, I think.
Bahahah, excellent.
Ganelon: They are somewhat unstable time bombs that rattle across the floor and sometimes detonate prematurely.
(I love Artificers)
Apheori (GM): Can they detonate in your bag?
Aziraphale is still sleeping fitfully
Ganelon: No, they have to be set to explode first. The issue is with the timer.
Apheori (GM): Ah.
Ganelon: Not that I would recommend tossing them around. That might cause them to become active.
Apheori (GM): Greibel, Gravy: Do either of you do anything else, or just sleep?
Gaurav: ... what are the computer parts for?
Bear Soup Guy: I get really stoned and then I go to sleep
Gaurav: How long does it take Griebel to get really stoned?
Frezak (GM): Nah, I'll sleep.
Greibel is always stoned.
Bear Soup Guy: ten or fifteen minutes probably
Ganelon: If I were a good enough artificer to make time bombs out of nothing but fertilizer, I'd have built us a new ship to leave this planet already.
Bear Soup Guy: =D
Ganelon: Anyways, I'll also make something out of this dragon gunk.
Apheori (GM): Radek: Roll to see if the fumes from Greibel's getting stoned affect you.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
19
)
=
19
Apheori (GM): Yeah, you're fine.
Ganelon: Phew.
Bear Soup Guy: bummer
Ganelon: I'll also make two vials of Alchemist's Fire and a Woundpatch (it's like a band-aid).
Apheori (GM): Now do the fumes from Radek's stuff affect Greibel?
Ganelon: From dragon... substances.
Apheori (GM): We may never know.
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Ganelon: Oh, right.
And I want to do tests on this stuff I'm covered in now that we have the time.
That will be all, though.
Apheori (GM): What sorts of tests?
Ganelon: Hm...
Well, I don't want it to go away.
So tests to see if it can be replicated or... maintained.
Apheori (GM): Well, you find you can push it around a bit - get it to get thinner or thicker... how would you try to replicate it?
Or should you just roll a SCIENCE for that?
Ganelon: I haven't the foggiest idea.
I don't even know what this stuff is. Maybe that would be a good start.
Since it came from... me going a little crazy and walking through a wall.
Bear Soup Guy: Spell of spectral analysis
Gaurav: You could do a perception check and see if any of its properties remind you of anything else.
Ganelon: Well, I'll give you a roll for that.
Gaurav: (I say that because you get a +1 on perception if you're within 5 squares of me)
Apheori (GM): It goes through walls? Even when you're asleep?
Bear Soup Guy: He's VERY vigilant
Ganelon: My science is better anyways.
Science:
rolling 1d20+10
(
10
)
+10
=
20
Apheori (GM): It's definitely magical. It appears to have properties related to time and non-existence, but as for what it actually is, you have no idea.
It also appears to not, technically, strictly speaking, actually be there.
But it's more than enough there to... be there.
Ganelon: I'll keep studying it at later opportunities.
For now I'll just take a sample which is not sticking to my person, if possible.
Apheori (GM): The sample disappears when you detach it.
Gaurav: Huh.
Ganelon: Interesting.
Apheori (GM): AND NOW IT'S MORNING.
Ganelon: Yes, that was all I needed to do.
Gaurav: Did you get any of that stuff somewhere that you can remove, like a glove or weapon?
Apheori (GM): Well, everyone but Azir is probably still asleep.
And no, it's just on him - and attached to him.
Rhu opens an eye, groans, then closes it again.
Apheori (GM): On his clothes and stuff.
You could try taking a bit off, though.
Wen: wait, what happened to me o_O
Apheori (GM): You just woke up. You're fine.
But awake.
Wen: Oh.
Aziraphale nudges Rhu
Apheori (GM): Unless... you're NOT FINE?!
Ganelon gasps.
Apheori (GM): I kid.
Ganelon: He's gone coarse!
Rhu groans and gets up.
Wen: Good. A sanity roll would be a terrible way to start the day. >_>
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Apheori (GM): Oh, wen, rob, d20s.
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20
(
7
)
=
7
Wen: /me groans
Aziraphale:
rolling 1d20
(
5
)
=
5
Apheori (GM): Rob: You want waffles.
Azir: You want pancakes.
Wen: Stroopwafels!
Greibel: Waffle time!
Ganelon: I actually know what those are!
Wen: NO I OVERRIDE THIS EVERYONE WANTS STROOPWAFFELS
Ganelon: But they'd make a pretty poor breakfast, no?
Wen: >_>
Apheori (GM): Probably.
Wen: Why? A stroopwaffel on a mug of tea...
Sounds pretty brilliant to me. But I want pancakes.
Apheori (GM): EVERYONE BUT GRAVY: You're awake and you can hear gravy's snores.
Bear Soup Guy: now I want an IRL cup of tea
Wen: (Seriously. They're _much_ better melted than if you just tried to eat it)
Aziraphale goes knock on Gravy's door
Gaurav: Oh great, now I want stroopwaffels :(
Ganelon: I suppose I'll just open the door and flood the entire hallway in toxic and/or intoxicating fumes.
Bear Soup Guy: Good idea
Rhu: Maybe we can ring him on these earpiece things? /me points at his ear
Radek: I made some bombs.
Apheori (GM): Radek: Also your ritual.
Apheori (GM) is getting mighty tired of this lack of comprehension.
Ganelon: Sorry.
Comprehend Language takes 10 minutes to perform.
Apheori (GM): A bloody dead end, is what it is.
Ganelon: So I suppose I could just shove Greibel out of the room and start doing that.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Are you... strong enough?
To do that.
Bear Soup Guy: Greibel is groggy enough
Ganelon: 8 strength? Oh, most certainly not if he's resisting.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Bear Soup Guy: Greibel's a pacifist. Except when fighting mutant chickens and other oddities.
Apheori (GM): Greibel, Rhu, Azir: So you're all in the hall outside Gravy's room...
Aziraphale: I knocked.
Ganelon: You can probably hear the ritual happening.
Since it involves magic words and all that hogwash.
Apheori (GM): Knocking did nothing.
Aziraphale: I open the door and step inside cautiously
Apheori (GM): You see a sleeping Gravedigger on the floor hugging his shovels.
Rhu shakes his head.
Aziraphale: I kick him lightly.
Greibel: Awwwww
Frezak (GM): How lightly?
Aziraphale: Enough to displace the body part I kicked by about 5cm, not enough to hurt, or at least significantly.
The Gravedigger: Fzzgl?
Wstfgl!
Gnuuur.
Oh. Hey.
Wen: do any of us have toothnbrushes? >_>
Apheori (GM): Whether you do or not is up to you.
The others probably do in their... kit thingies.
Frezak (GM): I totes have all the adventurer things.
Wen: Okay, so I try to find the washroom.
Apheori (GM): There's a pitcher at the end of the hall.
Ganelon: I don't know if I even have real teeth.
Wen: I splash some water on my face, brush my teeth, and drink a cup of water.
presentability += 100!
Greibel goes through the morning drug ritual
Ganelon: I feel like Radek would have replaced his teeth with rotating sawblades if he still ate things.
Frezak (GM): I will check my shovels and go see whether there is food downstairs.
Gaurav: Rhu does the morning stuff also.
Apheori (GM): Your shovels are fine. Downstairs the place is empty, but there's a note you can't read and a loaf of bread and five bowls of congealed porridge at a table.
Gaurav: Aww!
Frezak (GM): PORRIDGE
Wen: I eat my share of the food.
Frezak (GM): I EAT THE PORRIDGE/
Wen: WITHOUT TALKING.
Apheori (GM): All of it?
Ganelon: Shall we say the ritual is done now?
Wen: (but still trying to get my communicator to work)
Apheori (GM): Yeah, it's done.
Rhu heads downstairs also. He is impressed by the food, but surprised by the lack of people. He walks around and checks if maybe somebody is in the kitchen or somewhere.
Ganelon: Alright. These come with rolls (but cannot fail - it usually determines degrees of success), so here goes.
Apheori (GM): Wen: Remind me, what was wrong with it? >.<
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+10
(
19
)
+10
=
29
Well!
Gaurav: Woo!
Apheori (GM): Is that on the note?
Wen: There's no signal?
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You find the barkeep asleep in the kitchen.
Wen: Unless there is.
Apheori (GM): Wen: Ah.
Yes,
No signal other than the others.
Ganelon: So I can definitely understand this language. Can I speak it?
Wen: I was just kind of parodying my real life eating ritual. Not talking since I eat alone, but reading stuff on my phone. :P
Apheori (GM): Uh... sure, why not.
Rhu tiptoes back out and sits down to eat some porridge.
Wen: Whoo!
Ganelon: Then I'll pack up my things and head downstairs as well.
Greibel comes down to eat, very hungry
Greibel: Is there a bottle of hot sauce around here anywhere?
Radek: ...What is this? They left food for us?
Apheori (GM): There seem to be some rather suspicious bottles behind the bar, but they probably aren't hot sauce.
Rhu: So it seems. They left a note.
Greibel: Eh, I'll smell 'em
Wen: Is it wow-wow sauce? >_>
Apheori (GM): Greibel: Roll a d20.
Frezak (GM): If it's Wow-wow I'm drinking that shit.
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
17
)
=
17
Radek: Let me see that.
Ganelon: I will look at the note.
Apheori (GM): Radek: The note says 'Thanks for your business. Here's breakfast. And yes, I know you probably can't read this. -J'
Ganelon: I'll read it out aloud to the party because Radek loves showing off.
Apheori (GM): Do you read it aloud translated, or in the original language?
Ganelon: Translated.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: When you take off the cap and smell the bottle, it does not knock you on the floor, but it still gives it a very good try. The fumes are... very strong.
Rhu: Does the script look similar to that in the old journal we found at the campsite?
Apheori (GM): Ít may or may not be the same script. The handwriting, however, is a lot neater.
Greibel: Hey Rhu, smell this
Apheori (GM): Rhu: d20
Rhu:
rolling d20 against fumes
(
20
)
=
20
Apheori (GM): Ooo, you got lucky.
Ganelon: We've been rolling really damn well to resist fumes.
Also, that ought to be an Endurance roll, says I.
Apheori (GM): It doesn't do anything to Rhu except smell bad.
Bear Soup Guy: We have poor noses
Apheori (GM): I think it was.
Aziraphale: Hey, Radek, can you try reading the journal thing?
Apheori (GM): What's an endurance roll?
Radek: Certainly. This only lasts for a day, so I recommend we make use of it as best we can.
Gaurav: It's a skill check based on Constitution.
Ganelon: Endurance is just another skill.
Apheori (GM): Oh, endurance is a thing!
Ganelon: Yarr.
Rhu hands Radek the old journal.
Apheori (GM): Yeah, I was just basing that on constitution. Well, anyhoo.
Ganelon: Without training, they're basically the same thing anyways.
Apheori (GM): Yesh.
Greibel shrugs and looks at the bottle
Greibel: Good enough
Greibel liberally applies the bottle's contents to his porridge and prepares to eat
Aziraphale: Err, Greibel
Have some of this bread instead, will you?
I don't want to have to drag your pooping arse around for the whole day.
Ganelon: If the bowl doesn't melt, I'll check out the journal.
Greibel: hmmph
Greibel reluctantly takes the bread
Apheori (GM): It doesn't melt, but the porridge does seem to have a chemical reaction with the liquid.
It's kind of fizzing and smoking.
Gan: The journal!
Does the ritual account for bad handwriting?
Because it is really bad handwriting.
Ganelon: Eh, I rolled a 19.
Rhu picks up his bowl and steps away from the bubbling porridge.
Ganelon: It's probably no worse to me than anyone else's bad handwriting.
So... quite bad, still.
Frezak (GM): Handwriting is probably alien to you coming from a future time.
Ganelon: Nah, man, the journal was just printed in a really shitty font.
Bear Soup Guy: Comic sans :>
Apheori (GM): Well, okay, so you open the journal and realise it's not the same language, or even script, as the note.
Ganelon: Oh my.
Apheori (GM): The page you're on appears to be a fair bit of ranting about ferns.
Wen: Comic Sans is actually pretty readable. Just ugly.
Ganelon: In that case I actually can't read it unless you want to bend rules.
Apheori (GM): Pfft.
Ganelon: Comprehend Language works on one language as specified.
Apheori (GM): I guess we're bending rules.
Because that makes no sense.
Ganelon: But if this helps you move plot stuff along and doesn't force me to recast it? Yeah, I'm not complaining.
Apheori (GM): How do you know what the language is when you're doing the ritual?
Ganelon: You have to have heard or read it.
But it clearly insists that you pick one, too.
Gaurav: I think you're supposed to do the ritual with a piece of writing in the language you need to understand. Or with someone shouting words from it at you, I guess.
Apheori (GM): How does that apply to related languages?
Ganelon shrugs.
Ganelon: It's not that specific.
Gaurav: I wonder how it works with language families: if you "pick" French, can you understand some words from Spanish? I'd guess yes, since so much of the vocabulary overlaps.
Apheori (GM): And what good is it based on the spoken language if you want the written? Each piece is arbitrary and separate.
Ganelon: You just choose a language you've heard or a piece of writing you've seen within the past 24 hours and... *know* it for the next 24.
Apheori (GM): But that's two languages.
Written and spoken are very different forms.
Frezak (GM): I see it as more of a Babelfish than dumping the full lingual ability in your head.
Ganelon: So it's up to you.
Frezak (GM): You do'nt LEARN anything.
Ganelon: This is correct.
Frezak (GM): But for a time /a/ language is translated.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Frezak (GM): But without you knowing HOW the language is built.
Apheori (GM): So you don't know that it's a rant about ferns.
Sorry.
Ganelon: As for the differences between spoken and written, they are kept separate.
As in, you can use the ritual and translate both, but only if you have access to both. One does not let you understand the other.
Apheori (GM): Ah.
Okay.
Radek: This is still gibberish. Whatever language it happens to be, it's not what these people have been speaking.
I can perform the ritual again tomorrow if you really consider it important, but my supply of residuum is not infinite.
Rhu puts the journal away until then
Aziraphale: Ley
Let's go back to the village then.
Now that you can hopefully talk to the people.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: Are you sure you don't want that porrige?
It looks so... interesting...
Wen: I'm sure he doesn't want it
Ganelon: Someone else is welcome to have my porridge.
Greibel covertly dips some bread in the porridge
Frezak (GM): The bread screams.
Aziraphale takes the bread away from Greibel
Greibel: :(
Apheori (GM): Azir: Roll a spot first.
Ganelon: Perception and/or stealth!
Wen: spot?
Apheori (GM): Greibel: And you roll a... covert.
Perception.
Greibel: okie
Aziraphale:
rolling 1d20 + 3
(
15
)
+3
=
18
Greibel:
rolling 1d20+1
(
9
)
+1
=
10
Aziraphale: Good.
Apheori (GM): Now roll a grab.
Wen: whaaat
Too many hoops.
Ganelon: That's a strength mod vs. reflex.
Bear Soup Guy: Bread is serious business
Aziraphale:
rolling 1d20 + 4
(
15
)
+4
=
19
Ganelon: Lhoryn the gnoll grabs stuff all the time. I know grabs like Gravy knows holes.
Wen: wasting my good rolls -_-
Bear Soup Guy: What's a reflex?
Ganelon: It's a defense.
Apheori (GM): He got it away from you. >.<
Bear Soup Guy: Right then
Apheori (GM): Jerk.
Ganelon: AC, Fortitude, Reflex, and Will.
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Apheori (GM): ...actually that might have been a very good thing.
Wen: IT'S FOR HIS OWN GOOD
Apheori (GM): Heh.
Bear Soup Guy: Oh, /that's/ what "Ref" is
Ganelon: Yeah.
Apheori (GM): So. What now?
Aziraphale: I suggest we go to the village
Ganelon: Let's go babble at people.
I'm sure using the grouchy old guy as a translator won't cause problems.
The porridge calls to Greibel.
Greibel: O_O
Rhu: The village sounds like a good idea. Amadi said she was going to "Midnight". Maybe that's a city nearby? We could get back in touch with headquarters, and ... I don't know. Get back home or something.
Aziraphale: I think midnight is a time.
Radek: I admit to being somewhat curious as to where the other residents of this building have gone.
The Gravedigger: I don't think she meant a place.
At least not as we know it.
Aziraphale: Home, probably?
Rhu: The barkeep is in the back, asleep.
Aziraphale: It's the morning, after all.
it's not like people stay at bars all day.
Radek: Well, let's go get directions.
The Gravedigger: People that use their hands for a living get up as soon as light does.
Let's go find a king!
Ganelon: Says the only guy who slept in.
The porridge flops onto the table.
Frezak (GM): AS if /I/ had any decision in that.
Greibel: Hmmm...
Ganelon: OH GOD
Frezak (GM): It's the sauce of life.
Ganelon: Rifle at the ready.
The porridge purrs at Greibel.
Ganelon: Can we administer the spice of death to it?
Greibel: Huh...
Frezak (GM): POUR BOOZE ON IT
Greibel pulls out a fanged pea
The porridge: Spice of death?
Greibel set it down next to the porridge
The porridge: Ack, OOC
Rhu: Isn't booze in porridge how this started?
Apheori (GM): Sorry.
Ganelon: A play on words, dear porridge.
Frezak (GM): I will step away from this.
Aziraphale: Talking porridge?
Apheori (GM): That was an accident.
It hasn't talked. >.<
The porridge: YES I DID
THE GM IS TRYING TO SILENCE MEEEEE
Ganelon: Many things are described as the spice of life.
The porridge: HELLLLP MEEEEE
THE GM IS PLOTTING AGAINST YOU
Apheori (GM): ...
Greibel: =O
Apheori (GM): Please don't do that.
Ganelon: Well duh, that's her job.
Frezak (GM): That porridge speaks sense.
So, is the porridge really moving?
Or is that embroidery?
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+11 perception check to see why the porridge purred.
(
13
)
+11
=
24
Or just if there's something weird about the porridge.
Apheori (GM): The porridge managed to get out of its bowl and has been making some odd noises, mostly at Greibel.
The Gravedigger: I hope it's not going to do that in my stomach.
Bear Soup Guy: And I presented it with a fanged pea
Aziraphale: It was the sauce
your stomach is probably safe.
Apheori (GM): The porridge itself doesn't seem to be porridge anymore. Whatever Greibel poured on it seems to have had a very odd effect, though it seems normal enough by itself...
Fanged pea rolls away from the porridge.
Gaurav: Phew.
Rhu: ... what was in that bottle?!
Greibel: It smelled delicious :(
The porridge leaps and devours the pea, which lets out a horrible little shriek before being enveloped.
Aziraphale: o_O
Greibel: O_o
Aziraphale: Can we just go yap at people now?
Rhu: 0.0
Greibel: Yeah...I think the porridge can take care of itself.
Rhu: We should keep the bottle. It might come in handy.
Ganelon: I'm going to be a little more responsible.
Aziraphale: and Greibel use your eyes and not your hands, please.
Ganelon: And freeze the porridge.
Apheori (GM): Is this magic?
Ganelon: It is magic.
Apheori (GM): The porridge eats it.
Ganelon: I have not yet learned to make liquid nitrogen with alchemy.
Radek: Well, that's troublesome.
Greibel: I saw this in a movie once
Want to know the ending?
The Gravedigger: Are going to try and kill this?
Or just... leave it here?
The porridge jiggles.
Rhu: The bottle was in this inn. They probably know how to deal with ... this.
Aziraphale: If we can't trap it in a container, we should probably just leave it be.
Rhu: I think we should take the bottle though. It might be useful to be able to animate porridge in the future.
Radek: Agreed.
Aziraphale: That'd be theft.
Radek: Don't care.
Greibel: If I had a nickel for every time I needed some animated porridge...
Aziraphale: Do you go in a sushi place and then take the bottle of soy sauce?
You'd be seriously in debt, Greibel.
Now be quiet.
Radek: Soy sauce is much less fascinating.
Rhu: We could wake the barkeep and ask.
Bear Soup Guy: Oops
Aziraphale: If one of you has a jar I suppose we could take a sample.
Bear Soup Guy: I think I just destroyed a cooking pot
Wen: ><
Ganelon: Uh oh.
Bear Soup Guy: I totally forgot I was putting on some water for tea, like......an hour ago >_<
Apheori (GM): The pot should be fine, no?
Bear Soup Guy: The bottom is black
But it appears to still be in tact
Apheori (GM): Meh, that's fine.
Frezak (GM): Just wash it.
Apheori (GM): What about the porridge?
Wen: can we trap it?
Gaurav: BSG: oof :(
Apheori (GM): You can try.
Bear Soup Guy: Yeah okay, looks like it'll be alright
Aziraphale: I just want to trap it so it can't get away. Nothing fancy. No battles.
The porridge bounces toward Greibel and purrs at the edge of the table.
Greibel cautiously puts out a hand to pet it
Rhu: Maybe we could catch it in a cloak?
Aziraphale: Ehh, I just don't want it to destroy the place when we go
If you guys don't think it'll do that we can just leave it be.
The porridge rises to meet the hand and wiggles in response.
Wen: Apheori: This seriously reminds me of the slime in AMD 1 xD
Apheori (GM): I have no idea what that is.
Rhu: We could ... dig a hole and bury it.
Radek: We certainly have the tools for that.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: When you try to draw your hand away, you realise the porridge is stuck to it.
Rhu: I say we wake the barkeep. Odds are, he'll know how to deal with his drinks accidently animating breakfast meals.
Uh oh.
Greibel: Huh
Odd
Greibel holds the porridge up to Rhu's face
Greibel: WOOOOOOO! I'M THE HAAAAAUUUUUNTED PORRIIIIIIIIDGE!
Rhu: Greibel ... ? Are you okay?
Apheori (GM): His hands appear to have turned black.
Frezak (GM): Sounds okay for a hippie druid druggue.
Wen: Apheori: http://www.squidi.net/comic/amd/view.php?series=amd&ep=1&id=82
Apheori (GM): Not with gangrene or whatever, but just... coated like Radek. Except in black.
Aziraphale: Urgh.
Is it spreading?
Is his hand withering?
Greibel: Try to make a joke and people start questioning your sanity
Also ouch
Rhu: Does it hurt?
Apheori (GM): Not spreading or withering. Doesn't hurt. Feels a bit cold.
Gaurav: Sorry about that, BSG: I missed your action, so I thought you'd suddenly been possessed by the porridge. My bad.
Rhu: If it's cold, maybe warm will attract or repel it.
Bear Soup Guy: s'alright
Greibel: Magic me some warm, Guru man
Ganelon: Uh.
Radek: That would be unsafe to say the least.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: The porridge seems to be afraid.
Rhu: You could step outside and see if the sun has any effect on it.
Gaurav: Aww.
Bear Soup Guy: Aw, poor guy
er
Aziraphale: Or we could wake the barkeep up
Greibel: Aw, poor guy
He just wants to eat fanged peas and look all goopy
Radek: I can apply incendiary chemicals, but to your hands? Not... recommended.
Bear Soup Guy: Can I NATURE it?
Apheori (GM): Yes.
What does naturing it do?
Greibel:
rolling 1d20+11 nature stuff
(
10
)
+11
=
21
I have no idea
Apheori (GM): Someone who knows things! Help!
Bear Soup Guy: Probably makes me more in tune with its consciousness, if it has one, since it's now attached to me
Ganelon: One sec.
Gaurav: Try to understand what it's doing? What it might be?
Aziraphale: I'll go and wake the barkeep up
Apheori (GM): Can a druid use that to communicate with things?
Ganelon: If we treat this as an animal, nature would be used to either interact with it (taming, calming down, etc.) or identify it.
Apheori (GM): Okay, which were you trying to do, Greibel?
Gaurav: Azir++
Apheori (GM): It's totally an animal.
Ganelon: I doubt the latter has much chance of success since this is no normal thing.
Wen: This reminds me of 20Q
Bear Soup Guy: Yeah I wanted to talk to it
Ganelon: But that's not up to me.
Apheori (GM): Okay. You talk to the porridge.
Bear Soup Guy: We've identified it, it's mutant porridge, obvs :P
Wen: What happened to the barkeep?
Greibel: Hey little porridge, what's your name, buddy?
Apheori (GM): It's not intelligent enough for words, but it likes eating and it likes you because you're its mum, but it doesn't like being stuck, but it's not completely freaking out because it's you that it's stuck to and you're okay because you're its mum, but it doesn
't want to be stuck.
Greibel: =O
Apheori (GM): Wen: You wake the barkeep. She says something you don't understand.
Gaurav: AWW
Wen: I wave Radek over
Greibel snuggles the porridge
Ganelon: Coming over.
Apheori (GM): The porridge relaxes a bit, but still doesn't want to be stuck.
Rhu: Greibel: I think you need to give it a name.
Apheori (GM): The innkeeper looks at Azir and Radek enquiringly.
Greibel: I shall call him....Rasputin.
Aziraphale: Radek, can you get the barkeep to look at this thing?
Ganelon: I'll... denote alternate languages somehow.
Innkeeper: So...
Rhu gingerly tries to touch Rasputin the Porridge.
Radek: ~I can talk to you for the remainder of today.~
Innkeeper: ~Oh, sure, and you couldn't do that last night?~
Greibel cautiously holds out Rasputin and sends signals of calming nature to it
Innkeeper: ~What is it?~
Apheori (GM): The porridge shrinks away from Rhu's finger?
.
But it calms.
Radek: ~I could not. My... "friend" over here appears to have done something idiotic and might need your help.~
Rhu: Aw. Poor thing.
Radek: ~There is animate porridge stuck to his hands.~
Innkeeper: ~Idio... oh, he did NOT get into the...~
Greibel continues to try to get the porridge to warm up to Rhu
Aziraphale nodds emphatically
Radek moves out of the woman's way.
Innkeeper bustles over to the common room, and then just sort of stops.
Aziraphale: -d
Innkeeper: ~What.~
Greibel: ...What?
Innkeeper: ~YOU!~
Innkeeper points at Greibel.
Innkeeper: ~WHAT DID YOU DO?~
Greibel: Help! Scary man's yelling gibberish at me!
Apheori (GM): Woman.
It's a woman.
Greibel: Woman!
Rhu steps back from Griebel
Radek: ~He poured the contents of that bottle into his porridge.~
~I don't suppose you could explain what caused the reaction, could you?~
Innkeeper stares for a moment, then turns back into the kitchen and bursts out laughing.
Rhu: Huh.
Radek shrugs at Rhu and the others.
Greibel: ....So...this is okay then.
Translate that laugh. What does it mean?
Radek: It means she laughed at you.
Greibel: Oh, how exotic!
Aziraphale grumbles.
Innkeeper: ~You don't have shalott where you're from, do you?~
Frezak (GM): Shalott? HAH.
Gaurav: How did Rasputin respond to the laugh? Or the innkeeper? If at all?
Ganelon: I know nothing of shalott.
Apheori (GM): Rasputin is calm.
Radek: ~I do not.~
Innkeeper: ~That bottle was one of the reagents, though... well, it might have been going a little off.~
~Shalott is a very strong drink. It's what you drink when you don't want to have to drink anything else.~
~Though I'll admit it's not supposed to do that.~
Greibel meanwhile plays with it like a kitty
Apheori (GM): The effectiveness of the playing is limited by its still being stuck to your hand.
Radek: She says it's a strong drink.
Apheori (GM): Did Rhu ever actually poke it?
Gaurav: I'm going to say no, if the porridge shrunk away Rhu wouldn't have tried to touch it.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Gaurav: Give animated porridge their space, I always say.
Radek: Nothing about it animating porridge. I theorize that Greibel is responsible for that.
~Do you know of a place called Midnight, miss?~
Innkeeper: ~Oh, you're a charmer!~
Ganelon: ...
Sure.
Rhu: Greibel, or any of us? Maybe we picked up something from Sarathi that ... has an effect on porridge? Or shalott? Or both?
Innkeeper: ~Afraid not. There's Aierseth, and Wayside.~
Greibel: What an oddly specific thing to pick up
Aziraphale: It might not be specific.
Innkeeper: ~Unless you mean one of the ruins of the Gaher? They had odd names like that.~
Aziraphale: Porridge may just be one of the things that react with it.
and Shallott.
Rhu: Maybe it affects all fluids ... (Rhu shrugs, clearly not really convinced himself)
Greibel: Porridge is hardly a fluid
Greibel scoffs disdainfully
Radek: Hmph. ~I'm not sure. Ideally, we would like to visit a... more advanced place than this.~
Aziraphale mutters, not particularly caring how this happened, utterly convinced that if Greibel had kept his greasy fingers to himself..
Radek: ~Somewhere with a communications array, at least.~
Innkeeper: ~Advanced? You mean older?~
Bear Soup Guy: brb
Radek: ~No, my dear. /Newer./~
~Places with technology.~
Innkeeper: ~Well, if you want wizards, you're on the wrong side of the world, I think. Magic here has... moved on."
~
~Unless the whole world's moved on by now. Used to be we had all manner of wonders. Now it's just gone save for the oldest places.~
Radek: ~That's upsetting news... other side of the world, you say? How long is the circumference of this planet?~
Ganelon: What do you mean you don't know science, foolish barkeep?
Innkeeper shakes her head tiredly.
Innkeeper: ~More. You're more of them, aren't you.~
~And I thought you were just old tales, told to scare the kids.~
Radek: ~Excuse me?~
Bear Soup Guy: back
Innkeeper: ~You should visit the Hole at Vermai. It is where the Cataclysm began.~
Gaurav: oooh
Innkeeper: ~Go. Take your sorrows and see your doom for yourselves.~
Innkeeper smiles.
Innkeeper: ~When you return, you will understand the purpose of shalott.~
Ganelon: Well that's ominous.
Apheori (GM): She wants to get you drunk.
BE AFRAID.
Ganelon: And I'M the charmer
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Rhu: >.>
Apheori (GM): You called her miss. She's a bit on in years... though compared to Radek certainly she is a miss. XD
Rhu: Greibel: how do you suppose Rasputin is holding on? Is he sticky at all?
Greibel: Sticky...well...yes.
He seems to be alright though.
Radek: ~I will no doubt mourn the loss of my ability to metabolize alcohol soon, then.~
~Where is this Hole?~
Ganelon: Well, "at Vermai", of course, but I don't know where that is.
Innkeeper: ~Easterly and south. You will find things get more dead as you approach.~
Apheori (GM): That's the direction the sinkhole you saw was in.
Aziraphale: Well, let's thank the innkeeper and move on.
Radek: I have our destination, it seems.
Rhu: Hey, if Radek wants to have a drink with her or anything, I'm sure I could find something to do ..
Radek: ~The others wish to convey their thanks.~
Ganelon: Nonsense, Rhy.
Rhu*
Innkeeper: ~You can tell your friend he can keep the rest of that bottle if he wants. I wouldn't use it anyway after what it's done to the porridge.~
Aziraphale looks at Radek inquiringly
Radek: The sinkhole we saw earlier.
The porridge pulls itself free of Greibel's black hand and bounces up his arm, resting on his shoulder.
Radek: I'm afraid we may be here for quite a while longer.
Greibel: =D
Shoulder porridge!
Wen: I meant the bottle bit. We can keep it.
Greibel strikes an adventurous pose
Radek: There are no cities, nor ships or communications arrays.
Aziraphale: This is depressing
The Gravedigger: What a surprise.
Rhu: Pirate Rasputin!
Radek: We may still be able to leave through magical means.
Rhu: What about distress beacons? Maybe there's one in CAR?
Apheori (GM): A bunch of the porridge is still stuck to Greibel's hand.
But it seems to be a dead bunch now.
Radek: Come on. And take the bottle with you.
Greibel wipes it off
Gaurav: Shall we head to car? Or do we want to talk some other villagers while Radek can?
Ganelon: Up to you.
Gaurav: I think we should at least say hi and see if anybody knows anything else about the catastrophe. If this planet really is as bereft of life as all that, we might not see other sentient beings for a while.
Radek: ~Thank you for your patronage, miss.~
Innkeeper bows slightly.
Gaurav heads outside.
Gaurav: oops
Rhu heads outside.
Ganelon: I'll follow suit.
Apheori (GM): It's sunny out!
Aziraphale follows
Frezak (GM): Sun!
Apheori (GM): And some folks are lounging around.
Greibel: Let's go, Raspy. What a nice day!
Radek: ~Ho there! Loiterers!~
Villager: ~Hail, grampa!~
The porridge shrinks slightly in the sunlight.
Rhu: Mm, warm!
Gaurav: BTW worth warning people that I have to leave for class in another 20 mins or so :-/
Villager: ~You speak in words, no?~
Greibel: Nice to have a sun in the sky for once. That doesn't want to eat us.
Radek: ~For today.~
Villager: now*
~By the grace of the saints, then? Today is a good day.~
The Gravedigger: No fish so far.
Villager: ~Don't be daft, Chuck. They's wizards. It's wizarding.~
Rhu: Shh, don't give the weather ideas.
Radek: ~By the grace of my skill at magic, more like. Your friend is correct.~
Villager: ~Oh, daft, whatsit? Where do you think the wizards magic comes from?~
Gaurav: These villagers are straight out of Asterix and Obelix, in the best possible way :-D
Villager: ~Sod off.~
Radek: ~I'm sure an undeveloped culture like yours has a very quaint idea of where magic comes from, but I've no time to hear it.~
~What do you lot know about a Cataclysm?~
Villager: ~Oh, you're a grumpy one, ain't ye?~
~Cataclysm for a token.~
Ganelon: Wait, is he asking for money?
Villager: ~A token? They're outsiders, you idiot.~
Villager smacks the other one.
Villager smacks back.
Gaurav: I sincerely hope he's asking for money. I've been waiting for one of us to do an intimidate check.
Greibel: Heh, they must have the Three Stooges on this planet
Villager: ~The idiot means a story. When you from?~
Ganelon: When *am* I from?
Wen: I am from Sarathi
Apheori (GM): When.
Aziraphale: I don't know about the rest of you lot.
Wen: Oh.
Ganelon: I should know a date, shouldn't I?
Wen: This is the second time NPCs have conflated time and place. This might be important.
Apheori (GM): Date is a vestigial value from a time when a single planet was involved. It's arbitrary and inapplicable.
Frezak (GM): Time?
TIME?
WE ARE FROM BEYOND TIME.
WE STEPPED OFF THE HANDS.
Ganelon: Fair enough!
Apheori (GM): That said you need to denote time somehow, so it was the 14th span of the 843rd ending.
Whatever that means.
Gaurav: Maybe we can just tell them our age? "We are from 29 Earth years ago"
Radek: ~The 14th span of the 843rd ending, and I should sincerely hope, not the past.~
Greibel: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pYDCiLdkneY
Villager: Er.
~Well, you got me.~
Gaurav: Greibel: thanks!
Villager: ~Of course he got you. You don't even know what day it is!~
Radek: ~It doesn't mean anything to us either, don't worry. We abandoned the concept of a singular timeline eons ago.~
Villager: ~What day is it?~
~Shut up.~
Bear Soup Guy: Youtube-brain
Villager: ~You're used to holes?~
Radek: ~Of what sort?~
Villager: ~Holes.~
~You know. Stuff comes out. Goes in. Gets shredded.~
Radek: ~I travel with a brute who enjoys *digging* holes...~
Frezak (GM): Brute?
Ganelon: Yes.
Villager: ~Oy, you don't know that! There just happens to be a hole, and folks from the wrong times appear sometimes, but it's just as easily a coincidence.~
Frezak (GM): I have 12 int!
Villager: ~Does he dig through time?~
Ganelon: Your strength is not 8.
Frezak (GM): Pfff.
Noddle-armed grump.
Nozzle-armed?
Villager: ~Because this hole, what, it goes through TIIIIIME.~
~No it doesn't. You don't know that. Stop making up stories.~
Radek: ~Oh, marvelous!~
Villager smacks the other villager again.
Villager: ~Seriously, don't listen to him. He's addled, he is.~
Radek: ~Then presumably, the other side may house a time more agreeable than this one.~
Villager: ~Yeah, you just say that because you're addled and feel lonely.~
~Oh, no. there's no other side. Everything just gets shredded that gets near.~
~Yeah, he tried it. Dropped a big ol' boulder in there. You know what happened? It exploded is what happened!~
Radek: ~Have you considered using it for waste disposal?~
~Well, no matter, I should very much like to investigate any matter of spatial or temporal anomaly for myself.~
Villager: ~Why would we need a waste disposal?~
Gaurav: I'm going to have to leave in another five minutes or so. Are we meeting again on Saturday at the same time as today (11am MT)?
Villager: ~Too far away anyway. Three days just to dump compost? Eck.~
Ganelon: I'll be there.
Villager: Yes.
Oops.
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Bear Soup Guy: Works for me
Ganelon: I wish this ritual worked for more than just me.
You guys must be getting bored.
Gaurav: sweet! keep going, i have ~5 mins.
naah, it's fine. I (Gaurav) am well entertained by these amazing villagers. Rhu is sitting on the grass enjoying the sun.
Radek: They appear to be talking about some hole that shreds matter in its vicinity
Frezak (GM): 's cool.
Aziraphale: Marvelous.
Villager: ~And it killed everything. You should see the wildlife!~
~Kids love it, of course.~
~Back when we had kids.~
~Do you have kids?~
Wen: Not that I know of. /me runs
Villager: ~Chuck had a kid. Died.~
~All died.~
Radek: ~Machines are much less irritating.~
Villager: ~Oh, they'll wreck too.~
~Even turn on you sometimes.~
~I'd rather have a kid turn on me than a hulk, that's for damn sure.~
~Back when we had hulks, you mean? They went out before the kids did.~
Villagers blather at each other for awhile.
Radek: Hmph.
Gaurav: Hehe
Okay, I gotta run. Thanks for a great game! See you all on Saturday!
Ganelon: I'll assume this conversation is over
Bear Soup Guy: Bye Gaurav!
Apheori (GM): Looks like.
Ganelon: Unless they have something more to say to Radek.
Wen: Bye!
Gaurav: byeeeeee
Apheori (GM): Shall we call it a day?
Bear Soup Guy: Would be a good plot point to cut off at
I'm game for more if everybody else is though
Ganelon shrugs.
Ganelon: This is a good cutoff point.
Next session won't require me to do all the talking.
Aziraphale: So we slept, Radek made stuff, Greibel befriended porridge, and we talked to some villagers.
Wen: Heh.
Ganelon: Yes, at some point next time I'll have to bring up the making of stuff.
"Hey, anyone want a bomb?"
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Ganelon: "I got like, five of 'em."
"Bombs for everyone."
"They're a real blast."
Apheori (GM): Heh.
Wen: You get a bomb! You get a bomb! Everybody gets a bomb! *chucks* BOOM.
Bear Soup Guy: Such friendly terrorism
Ganelon: They are rather ineffective weapons, but you can set them as a minor action.
So you could set three bombs per turn, if you felt so inclined.
Frezak (GM): I'd just pick one and smash someone with it.
Apheori (GM): I won't be able to make it the 25th.
Just so you know.
Bear Soup Guy: Oh, neither will I
Ganelon: That's what, two weeks?
Wen: Yes.
Ganelon: Not a problem.
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Wen: So that's it for now?
Apheori (GM): Looks like.
Wen: Okay, well, farewell.
Bear Soup Guy: Adios 

Session 6

Gaurav: nooooo not the ducks
GM question: did Radek use up all the fertilizer to make his bombs (thanks, Radek!), or do we have any left?
Apheori (GM): Ask Radek.
Ganelon: I don't know how much it takes to make bombs!
Apheori (GM): You had like a gallon.
Gaurav: Did you make as many bombs as you possibly could, or did you make a reasonable amount and leave the rest?
Ganelon: I made as many as my mechanical parts permitted, not as many as the explosive material I had on hand did.
Gaurav: Let's put a number on the bombs made? Maybe 10?
Apheori (GM): As I recall, he made like five.
At least I think that's what he said.
Ganelon: 5..
Ye.
Yes*
Apheori (GM): Yes. That's exactly what he said.
There's some left.
I don't know how big these bombs are, or what's reacting with what, but all of the fertiliser wouldn't even fit.
OKAY.
WHERE ARE MY NOTES?
Frezak (GM): In the sack.
Apheori (GM): What sack?
Ganelon: They're small bombs.
Apheori (GM): Okay, so you're in the town. Radek was talking to a pair of codgy old villagers.
Frezak (GM): We were gonna visit the... sinkhole?
Gaurav: AWESOME codgy old villagers
Apheori (GM): You were going to head toward the sinkhole, since apparently it's some kind of rift in space.
Gaurav: We should invite them along.
Apheori (GM): There's also the rest of the village, some of whom are probably better educated than... these two.
Frezak (GM): Also, how does fuel work in this car?
How much more movement does it have left?
Gaurav: Do we *have* to go to the Source of the Catastrophe? There must be a cinema around here somewhere.
Apheori (GM): It seems to have... plenty, unless it doesn't. Apparently the designers thought it looked better to not include any sort of power gauge.
Frezak (GM): Hmph.
Apheori (GM): It's a dusty old village thing with no real signs of technology.
At least not that you saw before.
But that was night and people were weird and nobody really looked, did they?
Frezak (GM): Who was weird?
Apheori (GM): Mostly you guys.
And Amadi.
Mostly Amadi, actually.
Ganelon: Yeah, none of the willagers were weird.
Gaurav looks around the village for signs of advanced technology, or anything out of the ordinary.
Gaurav: err
Ganelon: Unless of course, they were weird for this place and normal to us.
Rhu looks around the village for signs of advanced technology, or anything out of the ordinary.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+11 perception check
(
14
)
+11
=
25
Wen: Do you intentionally talk like Elmer Fudd? XD
Frezak (GM): Who's talking like who?
Gaurav: What does Elmer Fudd talk like?
Apheori (GM): I think he means Gan.
Wen: Gan, and replacing v and r with w
Apheori (GM): I was right!
Apheori (GM) does a little dance.
Wen: Well done.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You see a lot of dust.
Gaurav: "willagers" is more Chekov from Star Trek than Fudd, no?
Wen: Hmm, actually, yeah, Fudd does r/l->w, not v->w.
Ganelon: It's intentional.
And Frezak's fault.
Apheori (GM): You also see some strange heaps of rubble - twisted metal, melted stone, wood that couldn't possibly be wood... the sort of thing kids would love to play on, except there don't seem to be any kids. Anywhere.
Wen: Okay.
Frezak (GM): So, do we leave the willage?
Rhu elbows Gravy: "There's a lot of dust here. How's the digging?"
Frezak (GM): I take all the blames.
Gaurav: Huh.
Frezak (GM): Junk?
Apheori (GM): And you notice the roofs are shingled in a way that makes no sense.
The Gravedigger: I'm not burying dust.
Wen: Should we ask the wiwawers about it?
(sorry >_>)
Gaurav: Should I roll another perception check to examine the rubble more closely? Or should we let one of the tech people (i.e. Radek) do that?
Apheori (GM) hits Wen with a frying pan.
Gaurav: Go on about the shingles.
Apheori (GM): Look if your guy would look.
Wen: I assume Radek can still talk to them.
Ganelon: He can all day.
Apheori (GM): The shingles are weird. You can't make sense of them. The pattern is wrong. The material is wrong. The shadows are wrong. It makes your head hurt.
Ganelon: But he is not an architect.
Not of buildings.
Gaurav: HUH.
Rhu: What's up with those shingles? They hurt my head.
Bear Soup Guy: an architect of WIZARD
Frezak (GM): Gravy knows about old-style things.
Anything he can learn from this?
The porridge wiggles.
Bear Soup Guy: ^_^
Rhu looks around for any shingle components that might have fallen off the roof for closer examination.
Frezak (GM): Don't tell me the shingles are scales >.>
Apheori (GM): Gravy: Some of the shingles are put on backwards. Like someone saw a picture of shingles, tried to make their own, and put them on in the wrong order.
Frezak (GM): Hmm.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: They're... some kind of ceramic. Apparently.
Frezak (GM): We might want to ask a willager how this place was built.
Apheori (GM): There is a loud thimphk soun behind you.
sound
Rhu puts one of the shingle components into my bag
Frezak (GM): Thimphk?
Rhu jumps.
Apheori (GM): Thimphk.
Aziraphale looks behind him
Apheori (GM): And a cloud of dust, apparently.
Small cloud.
Very small.
Frezak (GM): DUST
Apheori (GM): When it settles, you see some kind of metal object half embedded in the ground.
Wen: I examine the object
Apheori (GM): The villagers are watching curiously as well.
Roll a... thingy to recognise it.
Frezak (GM): What kind of thingy?
Ganelon: I'll do a magic thingy.
rolling 1d20+10
(
9
)
+10
=
19
Apheori (GM): History, I think.
Although other thingies would work too.
Frezak (GM): Crud.
Apheori (GM): Gan almost got it with magic.
Wen: well my history is 0 so... someone else?
I have +8 insight and +3 perception
Frezak (GM): I might just want perception to tell what it looks like rather than what it is >.>
Apheori (GM): Just roll, silly.
Ganelon: Damn.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+8
(
19
)
+8
=
27
Perception.
I see all the things.
I see the bugs in the grass.
I see the germs on the wind.
Apheori (GM): Frezak: Gravy recognises it from his shovel... however he got his shovels.
.It's an anvil.
Frezak (GM): I made my shovels.
Oh dear.
Rhu: Huh!
Rhu looks around anxiously to see where it might have fallen out of or come from.
Apheori (GM): No buildings over where it fell. The sky is clear. Wisps of clouds, a little dusty haze.
Rhu: Did it fall from the empty sky? Did it just appear magically behind us? What is it for?
Apheori (GM): Gravy's perception indicates it fell out of the sky. You could try asking the villagers if they have any idea...
The Gravedigger: That's an anvil.
They don't usually drop from the sky.
Rhu: What's an anvil?
The Gravedigger: Used for... shaping hot metal.
Gaurav: (I'm not being silly, Rhu would never have encountered an anvil before in his life. He's a big city boy.)
Rhu: Huh. It looks dangerous, it could have killed someone.
Maybe that's what happened to all the children ...
Aziraphale: What, an anvil dropped on them?
Don't be silly.
Radek, can you ask them if stuff drops out of the sky?
Radek: ~Does this happen often?~
Villager shrugs.
Villager: ~Sometimes. Not really.~
Frezak (GM): I'm suprised that you know what a shingle is.
Aziraphale: Okay, so it's at least happened before.
This is curious.
Rhu: The thing people put on their houses in the fancy part of town? Sure, I've seen those. But I just figured metal was shaped in ... I dunno, factories. Or something.
Radek: It is, these days.
Well, in our days.
Rhu: Do we have any technology that could warn us of incoming anvils? We might need to dodge them at some point.
Radek: The villagers don't see this sort of event often.
I have nothing on hand, at least.
Aziraphale: What about the funny metal things / toys? Did those drop from the sky as well?
The Gravedigger: Given how fast those drop, you'd need some seriously awesome detector thing.
Rhu: Ah, true.
Frezak (GM): I want to inspect the ... stuff. Is it scrap metal?
Apheori (GM): It... sure.
Oh, yeah.
Sorry, had to look up scrap metal.
It's not rusty.
It's not very shiny, either.
GREIBEL: I WANT A D20.
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
14
)
=
14
Frezak (GM): Does it look like it all came from the same... thing?
Or is it more .... assorted?
Apheori (GM): Assorted.
Frezak (GM): Hmmm.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You're kind of bored. The porridge is dripping down your arm. But you don't have any great urge to flap your arms and run around honking.
The Gravedigger: Radek, can you ask them where these came from?
Apheori (GM): One of the villagers gets up and ambles off.
The Gravedigger: Piles of scrap metal isn't really what I'd expect from this level of technology.
Apheori (GM): The other is watching Greibel as though waiting for something.
Ganelon: Sorry, the scrap?
The Gravedigger: I probably wouldn't expect a rain of anvils either, though.
Frezak (GM): Yes.
Greibel draws funny pictures in the dirt with a stick
Radek: ~Where did this metal come from?~
Villager: ~You know.~
Radek: ~Nowhere?~
Villager: ~Oh, totally. I'm sure it just appeared one day.~
Wen: (brb bathroom)
Villager: ~Everything came from somewhere, right? Except where did it all come from before there was a SOMEWHERE for it to come from, hmm?~
Villager nods sagely.
Radek grumbles.
Frezak (GM): Punch him.
Gaurav: Philosopher-villagers are the worst villagers.
Radek: He doesn't know. Another rift in space, I assume.
Frezak (GM): Aye.
Hmm.
Ganelon: If I punched him, it would probably hurt *me*
Frezak (GM): Well.
I have nothing more I can do here.
If you were a Warlord you could Direct A Punch.
Anyways.
TIme to go explore he sinkhole thing?
Ganelon: Sure.

Gaurav: We could try to Intimidate him, but I don't know that that'd help.
Rhu heads over to CAR and gets into the driving seat
Rhu: (Unless somebody else wants to drive?)
Frezak (GM): Nah.
I call shotgun.
Wen: (back)
Apheori (GM): Anyone want to dally, or do you all pile in?
Ganelon: No dallying here.
Aziraphale: I go in.
Rhu: Griebel?
Greibel: I'm content with sitting in back
Rhu: Cool. I think that's everybody? Let's go!
Apheori (GM): Rhu: Silly question, but can you drive?
I mean, have you ever done it before?
Rhu turns CAR on, gets us up to 20 ft or so, and drives us in the direction of the sinkhole.
Rhu: Yes. Also, I drove us here from the campsite.
Apheori (GM): Oh, okay.
Rhu: I'm a city boy, so experience with cars makes sense.
Apheori (GM): You realise you sat on something.
Rhu: Huh?
Rhu looks down to see what I'm sitting on
Apheori (GM): It's a string of beads.
Also it looks like someone painted on the dash.
Rhu: Huh!
Frezak (GM): Dang kids!
Rhu: Do these string of beads mean anything to anyone?
Ganelon: Not to my knowledge.
Gaurav: What's painted on the dash?
Apheori (GM): Gan: It appears to say 'guard'.
And there's a picture of a tree. Maybe.
Frezak (GM): In what language?
Rhu: Mysterious.
Aziraphale: Does it look like vandalism?
Rhu puts away the string of beads.
Apheori (GM): Yes.
It's the local language.
Aziraphale: Hmm...
I don't think we can gain much information from that alone. Let's go to the sinkhole.
Frezak (GM): Huh.
Literate peasants?
Rhu: Maybe it wasn't the peasants.
Radek: ...It says "guard".
The Gravedigger: Ominous.
Ganelon: How fresh is the paint?
Apheori (GM): It's dry.
Frezak (GM): It's definitely paint?
Rhu: Yeah, maybe it's magical? Maybe it "guards" us?
Also, what's with the tree?
Apheori (GM): It's not anything else that you know of.
The Gravedigger: Either it's 'beware the tree" or "the tree is a guard" or the tree means nothing and it's just general blabbings.
Radek: I'm inclined to believe the latter.
Frezak (GM): YOU HAVE NO MYSTERY IN YOUR SOUL.
It's full of... magic instead.
Radek: I'm a scientist.
Frezak (GM): Let's go!
Ganelon: Onwards.
Rhu keeps driving us towards the rift thing.
Apheori (GM): You fly over a bunch of trees.
They all appear to be dead.
It's kind of depressing.
Gaurav: The tree painted on the dashboard isn't dead, right?
Apheori (GM): It's hard to tell because it's so badly drawn.
A starved bear watches you pass.
Rhu: Greibel: can you talk to bears?
Frezak (GM): It's visibly starved?
Cripes.
What a shitty place.
Ganelon: That could be troublesome.
Apheori (GM): A really big tree rises out of all the others.
Or rather it seems to; it mostly just sits there as you approach.
Bear Soup Guy: CAN I talk to bears?
Frezak (GM): SLOWING DOWN MIGHT AN IDEA.
Rhu slows CAR down
Frezak (GM): Is this big tree alive or dead?
Ganelon: I'm inclined to say that you can, because you're a druid.
But I don't know if there's an explicit rule saying so.
Gaurav: How big is big?
Bear Soup Guy: right then
Greibel: Of course I can talk to bears, silly
Gaurav: It doesn't make sense that you can talk to animals, since they're not sentient. But there's a wizard ritual which allows you to command animals, I think?
Ganelon: Animals can still communicate with each other.
Gaurav: Ah, true.
Bear Soup Guy: It
Gaurav: I wonder if Griebel can produce pheromones.
Ganelon: Expecting a bear to know things is another matter.
Bear Soup Guy: 's more like...reading their emotions and intentions and stuff
Apheori (GM): You're past the bear now anyhow.
Frezak (GM): ANimals can communicate very simple concepts.
Wouldn't call it 'talking'
Apheori (GM): The really big tree has a littler tree growing out the side that isn't dead.
Frezak (GM): Cripes.
Apheori (GM): Also you seem to be at your destination. The hole opens up almost at the roots of the tree.
Radek: From what I've been told, approaching any further would be unwise.
Rhu stops CAR in mid air
Gaurav: Is the littler tree growing parallel or perpendicular to the big tree?
Frezak (GM): Can I roll Nature to learn anything about said trees?
Apheori (GM): It's growing out perpendicular at the base, but then it curves back up.
And you totally can.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+8
(
12
)
+8
=
20
Rhu: I think we should send Griebel in to investigate the tree -- he can get closer than we can in CAR without landing, and he can poke around with a single bird in his flock without risking himself (too much).
Apheori (GM): They're different kinds of trees, it doesn't appear to be grafted, but there are also no roots available.
Rhu: One of these trees might be our dashboard tree. But which one?
The Gravedigger: This is all really weird.
Radek: Don't ask me. I don't deal in organics.
The Gravedigger: That living one isn't the same kind as the big one. And I don't see roots.
That's really weird.
Rhu: I dunno. Compared to Sarathi, this is almost mundane. So far. (looks around warily for giant fish)
The Gravedigger: It might not be a tree.
Maybe something trying to look like one.
Apheori (GM): Greibel, Azir: d20s
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20
(
19
)
=
19
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+11 perception check to see if I can spot any evidence that the little tree might be something pretending to be a tree
(
10
)
+11
=
21
Apheori (GM): It's glowing slightly.
You aren't close enough to see in the hole, but maybe it's like that? You don't know.
Aziraphale:
rolling 1d20
(
19
)
=
19
Gaurav: Is the hole is at the roots of the big tree?
Apheori (GM): Pretty much.
Frezak (GM): Shoot the tree!
Rhu: Griebel: do your flock of seagulls thing!
Greibel: And I raaaan
I raaan so faaar awaaaaat
y*
Wait, maybe that's the wrong band...
Greibel turns into birds
Greibel sends one bird out to search the tree
Apheori (GM): Greibel: d20
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
7
)
=
7
Apheori (GM): The bird approaches the tree. Hello, tree. Nice tree. It lands. It seems normal enough. A little bit ill, a little bit lush, but not something dangerous. Smells just fine. Feels just fine.
The flock of Greibel all sort of just falls asleep.
Azir, Rhu: d20s
Rhu:
rolling d20
(
10
)
=
10
The Gravedigger: There.
See.
THat's not normal.
Aziraphale:
rolling 1d20
(
11
)
=
11
Apheori (GM): Azir: You feel the hole calling to you, not in words, but in a sense that it is important, you need to get closer, to see it. You must go to it...
Ganelon: Oh boy.
I hope that innkeeper was wrong.
The porridge sits on Greibel's seat emitting an aura of loneliness.
Rhu reaches out and pats the porridge reassuringly.
The porridge oozes over to one of the birds and partially envelops it in a strange sort of hug.
Aziraphale fidgets
The porridge cowers away from Rhu's hand.
Rhu withdraws his hand
The Gravedigger: Someone poke the rest of Greibel, would you ?
Ganelon: I don't know how to wake up birds, but I'll give it a shot.
Rhu: OY BIRDS
WAKE UP
Apheori (GM): The birds neglect to wake up.
Frezak (GM): Drive the CAR back and see if that works.
Dammit. No, the bird will still be on the tree.
If we;.. stab him or something, would he reform in the car?
Rhu: Maybe if we knock it off the tree?
I think I have a slingshot.
Apheori (GM): Azir, Rhu, Greibel: d20s.
Rhu:
rolling d20
(
17
)
=
17
Ganelon: I don't have anything that could grab him.
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
3
)
=
3
Aziraphale:
rolling 1d20
(
1
)
=
1
...
Apheori (GM): The bird on the tree falls off on its own and tumbles into the hole.
Ganelon: Nooooo
Gaurav: uhoh
Wen: I peer into the hole cautiously
Apheori (GM): Azir: The call of the hole is overpowering. You're not close enough to see in properly, and you must see in properly, you must.
Without realising what you're doing, you climb out of the car thing and fall to the ground.
Wen: I crawl on the ground
Rhu: Azir!
Damnit.
Radek: Oh, great.
Rhu lands CAR as close to Azir as I can
Frezak (GM): Gorram.
Ganelon: The bird didn't vanish, right?
Apheori (GM): You don't know. You still can't see in.
Well, not down.
You need to get closer to the edge, which is, conveniently or otherwise, where Azir seems to be going.
Radek: Gravy, hold him back.
Gaurav: If there's enough space between Azir and the tree in the direction he's crawling, I land CAR between them
Frezak (GM): I want to jump ONTO azir.
Wen: I try to crawl around it
Frezak (GM): Bodyslam thing.
Apheori (GM): o_O
Ganelon: Like a wrestler.
Apheori (GM): Okay... how do we determine if it smashes him?
Frezak (GM): Well.
First, is Azir actually crawling?
Or walking?
Wen: it'll probably be difficult to kill me if you just land on me since I'm wearing armour
Apheori (GM): He's crawling. He seems to have been rather hurt by the initial fall already.
Ganelon: I have things to fix injuries.
Frezak (GM): So if he's moving so slowly I can just drop onto him, no?
Apheori (GM): Probably.
Frezak (GM): So, i'll just do that then?
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Everyone: d20s
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
11
)
=
11
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20
(
12
)
=
12
Aziraphale:
rolling 1d20
(
17
)
=
17
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
8
)
=
8
Rhu:
rolling d20
(
11
)
=
11
Apheori (GM): Greibel wakes up partially and starts making funny bird noises.
Azir: You wonder what the hell you're doing.
Also there's something really large on top of you.
Aziraphale wonders what the hell he is doing
Aziraphale tries to sit up and look at what's on top of him
Gaurav: Is Greibel still a flock?
Apheori (GM): Gravy: You look into the hole and see water partway down. It looks disappointingly normal.
Gaurav: Yes.
Wen: Am I still crawling?
Apheori (GM): You can't.
Gravy's in the way.
By which I mean on top of you.
Wen: Am I sane now?
Apheori (GM): Saner.
Wen: Oh good.
Aziraphale: Hey, Gravy, get off me, I feel better now.
Apheori (GM): You still want to know what's in it, though. It still feels important. You just have more of a presence of mind to wonder what the hell.
Or something along those lines.
The Gravedigger: Promise not to start running into that hole?
Apheori (GM): Azir: d20
Aziraphale:
rolling 1d20
(
15
)
=
15
Apheori (GM): Azir: You feel like you don't need to run into the hole.
Aziraphale: Probably not.
Gaurav: Did Azir take any damage from jumping out of CAR at twenty feet? Or from having Gravy jump onto him?
The Gravedigger: Hmm.
Frezak (GM): I'll get up, but keep close in case he runs again.
Apheori (GM): Some.
Greibel: You can wake up properly now.
Wen: Can / should I heal myself?
Rhu: So: investigate the hole on foot? And hope we don't all fall asleep?
Aziraphale: I think it'll be a better idea if two people take a look.
And that two people shouldn't include me.
Frezak (GM): You know what.
We have rope.
Tie it around one guy. Preferably someoen light.
Aziraphale: I think dropping anyone down the sinkhole is a bad idea.
Ropes won't stop... time portals.
Or whatever that is.
Frezak (GM): And have me and whoever's left to yank in case they run or jump.
Radek: Let's start with something useless.
The Gravedigger: What, throw a rock?
Radek glances at Greibel. "Like... a rock. Yes."
Rhu: ... can Greibel turn into a giant spider? Spiders are good at holes. Or tunnels, at any rate.
The Gravedigger: It looked like it had water at the bottom.
If there's a magic ripping hole in there, it's invisible.
Aziraphale: Isn't one part of Greibel already _in_ the hole?
Ganelon: Can we see a bird down there?
Aziraphale: It might have drowned. It might have fallen through time.
Frankly I have no idea
Rhu: I could go with the rope tied around me. I'm pretty light. Or lithe.
Apheori (GM): You don't have a full view in. Do you want to get close enough to see?
Wen: I reiterate that I think it's better if two people go, instead of all of us.
Apheori (GM): Also the gulls are still just sort of sitting around the seat and floor or the car.
Frezak (GM): Is Greibel just sitting there making noises?
Apheori (GM): Pretty much.
Frezak (GM): I volunteer to look.
Since I'm apparently least likely to go crayzay.
Apheori (GM): Rhu, Radek, Azir: d20s.
Ganelon: I'll have your back.
Rhu:
rolling d20
(
19
)
=
19
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
6
)
=
6
Aziraphale:
rolling 1d20
(
3
)
=
3
Rhu: Yes, but *if* Gravy goes crazy, we're screwed. None of us can hold him down.
Wen: crap.
That's a fair point.
er, IG.
Apheori (GM): Azir, Radek: You really want to see what's in there.
Wen: Gahhh
Rhu: I'm happy to let them go, and for the rest of us to hang back as backup.
Aziraphale fidgets, but since it's happened before, he's more aware of it this time
Frezak (GM): As soon as Azir moves I tackle him again.
Since I was waiting for this.
Oh, right.
Gaurav: A Gravy tackle is a sight to behold.
Apheori (GM): Okay, so Azir is tackled.
Ganelon: Eh, Radek's getting impatient. He'll get closer.
The Gravedigger: SOMEONE GRAB RADEK
I have my hands full of paladin here.
Apheori (GM): Gravy: d20
Radek: I'll be fine!
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20
(
8
)
=
8
Radek: I'm coated in the stuff of time and non-existence.
The Gravedigger: FINE THEN
Rhu: Good point.
If we want to do the rope thing, we need to do that NOW and then back away. Otherwise we're all going to get mentally dragged into the hole.
Apheori (GM): Radek: You approach the edge. Roll perception.
Radek: Just a sec.
Ganelon: OOC.
I think I know what my perception mod is but I don't want to guess.
Apheori (GM): 7
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+7
(
7
)
+7
=
14
Yep. Thank you.
Rhu: +1 for being within five spaces of me?
Ganelon: Oh.
Then it's 15.
Apheori (GM): You peer into the hole. It looks like a normal sinkhole full of water. It's actually quite pretty.
With shades of blue and green fading to black at its depths...
Ganelon: Is there a rock or something I could toss in?
As I seem to still exist.
Rhu: If you can't find out, you could throw in one of those mysterious coins we found earlier.
Apheori (GM): There are rocks.
Sorry, chrome died.
It actually looks a little something like this, but deeper and more water. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Sink_hole.jpg
And no stairs and crap, obviously.
Gaurav: Pretty.
Ganelon: Pretty indeed.
Okay, so I'll chuck a rock towards it and observe.
Wen: Very pretty.
Gaurav: Is it that big? I imagined something 2-3m across.
Apheori (GM): Yes.
It's big.
The rock goes in as expected, with a slight splace.
splash
Then it bobs back up to the surface and floats.
There is no sign of a seagull anywhere.
Radek: Alright, hand me a rope.
Rhu:
rolling d20+11 perception check away from the sink hole, to see if anything else -- particularly anything on the tree -- responded to the splash
(
11
)
+11
=
22
Apheori (GM): The edges are kind of like this all the way around, though. http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Mosul_Dam_sinkhole.jpg
Rhu: You notice the gull in the tree.
Rhu: Hey! Isn't that a bit of Greibel?
Apheori (GM): You look again and the gull is gone.
Rhu: Right th-- hey, where did it go?
Gaurav: The rest of Greibel is still here, though, right? Can he still sense what's going on with the one missing gull?
Apheori (GM): His mind appears to be elsewhere.
Where, I couldn't quite say.
Apheori (GM) glares at Bear Soup Guy.
Ganelon: Hint hint.
Apheori (GM): Gan: You may have a rope of your own, if all else fails. After all, this is very interesting.
Very, very interesting.
Azir, Rhu, Radek: d20s.
And Gravy.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
4
)
=
4
Aziraphale:
rolling 1d20
(
11
)
=
11
Gaurav:
rolling d20
(
5
)
=
5
eep
Ganelon: Well, I want something to secure it to.
I'm not diving into this hole unless you force me to do it.
Rhu ties one end of my rope to CAR and throws the other end to Radek
Rhu: Catch!
Ganelon: There we go.
Apheori (GM): You do want to dive into the hole, or part of you seems to... and now you have a rope...
Wen: tie it to yourself first
is Gravy still securing me?
Frezak (GM): Probably.
Ganelon: Yeah, I'll hastily tie it around my waist and go for it.
Rhu: No no tie it properly
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You start following the rope as well and stare into the hole. As you do, you feel like all of your problems just fade away. All of the horror of the past few days just melts...
Rhu: and we might want to secure this end to both CAR and Gravy. CAR is great and all but Gravy is the stablest.
Apheori (GM): Azir: You feel slightly claustrophobic.
Aziraphale fidgets
Rhu: That water looks really cool and refreshing ... maybe a short swim will help us think about this problem better?
Apheori (GM): There's a tree.
TREE TREE TREE.
Gaurav: I don't trust tree. What if it vanishes? Or puts us to sleep?
Apheori (GM): Who knows!
Radek dives into the hole.
The rope goes taught a couple feet above the water.
Rhu: The water. So relaxing.
Apheori (GM): Nothing really interesting happens, except for it digging into him a bit uncomfortably as a result.
Frezak (GM): Gah.
Ganelon: Bungee jumping whoo!
Except with zero elasticity!
Frezak (GM): SHort of beating everyone senseless I can't stop people going down there.
Apheori (GM): Gan, Gravy: d20
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20
(
14
)
=
14
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
1
)
=
1
I LOVE THIS HOLE
Apheori (GM): You love the hole.
It's a wonderful hole.
Radek: THIS HOLE IS GREAT!
Apheori (GM): It's everything to you.
Radek: Lower the car!
I haven't hit the surface yet!
Apheori (GM): You feel like you could be one with the hole. All of the hole. The hole.
Gaurav: I want to go back to the car and drive it a bit closer so that Radek can be lowered further, but I guess I'm compelled to get closer to the hole? Can I roll fortitude or something to resist?
Apheori (GM): On the seat, where nobody is paying attention, a porridge-wrapped seagull fidgets.
Do it.
Wen: Please notice the seagull
Ganelon: Not fortitude, endurance.
Gaurav: Ah okay, that makes more sense.
Apheori (GM): Well, you could roll a straight up sanity here.
But that may have better odds.
Rhu:
rolling d20+1 endurance check to fight the desire to head for the water so I can go drive the car closer
(
10
)
+1
=
11
not by much
Apheori (GM): You don't want to move away.
Rhu fidgets, but stays where he is.
Apheori (GM): Well, the sanity could have the opposite effect.
Soll it!
Roll.
Rhu:
rolling d20
(
10
)
=
10
nothing if not consistent
Apheori (GM): No effect!
Rhu fidgets.
Ganelon: Curse your reliability.
Apheori (GM): Azir, Gravy!
Ganelon: I'm still dangling here.
Wen: I'm still fidgeting
Frezak (GM): I might as well just pitch everyone into the hole at this point.
Apheori (GM): Well, do something.
Wen: can I do a sanity roll?
Apheori (GM): Do it.
Aziraphale:
rolling 1d20
(
8
)
=
8
Apheori (GM): You want the hole.
Wen: Bah.
Apheori (GM): Roll again.
Aziraphale:
rolling 1d20
(
3
)
=
3
Wen: >_>
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Nothing interesting there.
Wen: Oh.
Frezak (GM): *sigh*
Well apparently we're gonna end up in this hole regardless.
I'll just drive the car down there.
Apheori (GM): All the way down?
With Radek hanging off it on a rope?
Ganelon: I guess that means I hit the water first.
Frezak (GM): He's a few feet from the water.
Apheori (GM): Hanging off a rope attached to the car.
Actually...
Radek: As the water gets closer...
Roll a d20.
Frezak (GM): So?
He'll just plop into the water.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
10
)
=
10
Apheori (GM): He plops into the water.
Can Radek swim?
Ganelon: He doesn't need to breathe anymore.
Apheori (GM): Oh, good point.
Okay, does he swim?
Ganelon: Nah. This hole has depths that must be plumbed.
Frezak (GM): Roll to wallow.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: d20
Ganelon: Unless he also floats. Then he could try to swim down.
Rhu:
rolling d20
(
16
)
=
16
Ganelon: Although I imagine he's far from an accomplished athlete.
Apheori (GM): Radek sinks. It's dark and watery and fairly clear. There is very little of interest.
Gaurav: Yeah, you'd float if you have enough fat on you. But he's got a bunch of metal things?
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You recover and do whatever you feel like now.
But the rock he threw in is still floating.
Wen: So the water's pretty dense.
Apheori (GM): It looks normal, though. The ripples look like... ripples.
Rhu blinks
Frezak (GM): I'll throw some random bit of junk into the water.
Apheori (GM): Azir: d20. Gravy's off you.
Aziraphale:
rolling 1d20
(
7
)
=
7
Wen: crap.
Apheori (GM): What random bit of junk?
Rhu: He's fallen in the water.
Frezak (GM): One of my... handaxes.
Rhu: We have coins and stuff.
Might be worth less than a handax.
Apheori (GM): Azir: You see bones.
Sticking out of the ground.
Piled up.
Littered about.
Wen: I examine the bones
Ganelon: Hm.
Apheori (GM): The handaxe sails into the hole and disappears.
Ganelon: You guys are throwing axes at the hole when I'm inside it?
Rhu walks away from the sinkhole, up towards the tree, and examines it.
Ganelon: You dicks!
Apheori (GM): Gan: You're hanging in the water. You see a handax drift down nearby.
Rhu:
rolling d20+11 perception check to examine tree
(
16
)
+11
=
27
Wen: Do I still feel an irresistible urge to go into the hole/
Apheori (GM): The axe disappears.
Ganelon: Uh oh.
Apheori (GM): Wen: Yes, but the bones are distracting you for the moment.
Ganelon: I'll climb this rope to the surface.
Apheori (GM): Azir: They look like bones.
Wen: I call out to the others and mention the bones
Aziraphale: Hey, guys, there are bones here.
Wen: can I do a perception check to see if they're real?
Apheori (GM): Rhu: It's a tree! It's dead. It's been dead for awhile. Nothing's really eaten it. Rain hasn't rotted it. The little tree is still glowing.
Radek: Who just threw an axe at me!?
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You realise the water is also glowing.
Frezak (GM): What kind of bones?
Apheori (GM): Wen: Totally.
Leg bones!
Aziraphale:
rolling 1d20 + 3
(
16
)
+3
=
19
Frezak (GM): Are they attached to thigh bones?
And I /tossed/ and axe into WATER.
Apheori (GM): Azir: They seem to be made of plastic.
Aziraphale: Guys, there are plastic bones here!
Gaurav: How high up is the little tree?
Apheori (GM): 20ft or something.
Gaurav: BSG is still MIA right?
Wen: looks like it :/
Radek: Plastic bones? Who cares!
The axe disappeared!
Gaurav: Can we hear Radek through our headset-things? Or do those not work underwater?
Apheori (GM): He climbed out.
Ganelon: At the very least his head is above the water.
Frezak (GM): Plastic bones?
The Gravedigger: That... sounds like a decoy.
Aziraphale: Come look!
The Gravedigger plods over to test the bones for plasticity.
Wen: GM: I don't know if they see them or not
Apheori (GM): They don't see them.
Frezak (GM): I am clearly a bone expert.
Wen: I expected as much
Aziraphale sweeps his arms to point at the bones all around them
Frezak (GM): The bones that I cant see?
Aziraphale: You can't see them?
Rhu: Radek: what does the water smell like?
The Gravedigger: GODS FUCKING DAMMIT.
THIS IS HOPELESS.
I'm gonna go back and become a helpful member of some community.
Ganelon: Can I smell?
Like, at all?
Apheori (GM): Gan: Nope.
Azir, Gravy: d20s.
Aziraphale:
rolling 1d20
(
2
)
=
2
Radek: You tell me! I can't smell things!
Wen: uh oh
Rhu: When some people start seeing bones that others can't see, always check for giant fish, that's my motto.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20
(
2
)
=
2
Apheori (GM): Azir: You ignore the bones and walk back to the sinkhole.
Gravy follows. It looks so... nice...
A way home. A way out of this. A way to just go somewhere away from the crazy...
Rhu looks around, sees that everybody except Griebel is walking towards the hole
Rhu: HEY!
Aziraphale: I want to go in.
I really want to go in.
(To Wen): This is the point where you can dive in.
Aziraphale: I think I should go in.
Rhu: WAIT! COME BACK!
Rhu gets back into CAR
Ganelon: I can... try to stop him.
Aziraphale walks towards the hole while taking off the more unwieldy bits of his gear
Aziraphale sits down at the edge of the hole
Aziraphale looks down
Aziraphale: Yes. I think I should.
Come, the rest of you, why don't you?
Radek: If that water made an axe disappear, I'd encourage you to think about what it'll do to you.
Aziraphale: It looks so nice... peaceful.
What can it do? I'm insane and seeing bones y'all can't see. We got jumped to another planet. Everyone on Sarathi is dead.
Well... if you're not following...
Aziraphale edges forward and dives
Rhu mutters something under his breath
Apheori (GM): Azir hits the water with a splash.
There's a horrible sucking squelching noise.
Apheori (GM): The water level suddenly starts lowering until it all drains out the bottom... leaving a dry stone base a few hundred feet down.
Radek falls back to the end of the rope.
Aziraphale is just... gone.
Radek: I warned him.
Wen: I did take off my gear. So you have at least a spare sword and whatever other thingies.
Rhu gasps, then quickly mumbles a prayer to Hazz'ridan
Gaurav: Ah, that's why you did that! If you've been trasnported somewhere, you're now without protection and weapons, though.
Apheori (GM): What sort of prayer?
This might be important!
Wen: I'm not sure if this was where I got killed off. Up to the GM.
Apheori (GM) smacks Wen.
Wen: ow.
Frezak (GM): "Make sure that he cannot go anywhere and is stuck forever without progression?"
A god of Dead Ends isn't really gonna be too useful here >.>
Gaurav: It's a spur-of-the-moment prayer-of-protection thing, like you might teach a kid who's scared of the monsters under his bed
Frezak (GM): Oh, the Soldier's Prayer.
Gaurav: Rhu's just kind of panicking here
Wen: something about how it's not really death, I just got an express ticket to the dead end
If you recognise the reference, I salute you.
Apheori (GM): Nope.
Gaurav: "Worshipful-Hazz'ridan-keeper-of-ends-guide-and-protect-me-until-the-end" kind of thing
Apheori (GM): Rhu: Hazz'ridan blesses you with your mind back.
Gaurav: My mind was ... not back?
Apheori (GM): It was only mostly back.
It seemed back, but it wasn't.
Ganelon: It always seems backer than it is.
Gaurav: Gan: hahaha
Apheori (GM): Now it's really back - like how it was bfor all it this started.
Gaurav: Aph: so what is new in my mind?
Apheori (GM): You're surrounded by CRAZY EVERYWHERE.
Also the hole is actually visible now.
Gaurav: HOLY CRAP
Wen: Ah, no wonder. I completely butchered the reference. But do carry on.
Apheori (GM): It's a strange little rippling thing in the air, not far from where Radek is hanging.
That's the real hole.
The rest just sort of... happened on top of it.
Rhu blinks
Rhu blinks again. The hole is still there.
Rhu goes down on one knee and prays to Hazz'ridan to reveal the truth to all his companions
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You feel a warm, loving embrace of TENTACLES EVERYWHERE/
.
Rhu: Mm, tentacular.
Apheori (GM): You're not really sure what to make of this.
Gaurav: After everything that's happened in the last few days, Rhu is perfectly happy to take warmth and love where he can.
Apheori (GM): Anyway, Radek sees it too: a shimmering rift in space.
Gaurav: Plus, clearly, something deep and religiously meaningful is going on. Rhu didn't believe in an active god who does more than work through his servants, but ... he's starting to now.
Radek: Hmph.
Rhu: Not sure if his prayer worked, Rhu describes what he can see to his companions. He leaves out the bit about the tentacles, though.
Radek: Now this is more like it.
Ganelon: May I inspect this rift, magically?
Apheori (GM): Gravy would see it if he actually looked. I dunno what he's up to.
You totally can.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+10
(
3
)
+10
=
13
Nnooooo
Apheori (GM): Also the seagulls start dancing.
Frezak (GM): I don't know what I'm up to either.
Apheori (GM): Gan: It seems to be a... rift in space!
Radek: This, my... companions, is a rift in space.
The Gravedigger: Great.
Radek: That's all I can tell you about it.
The Gravedigger: So it's a hole, like the willagers said.
Rhu: Well, we found it. At terrible cost, but we found it.
The Gravedigger: Azi might be haging around naked on the other side.
Frezak (GM): Did he leave his radio?
Rhu: Oooh, perhaps.
Apheori (GM): Yes. >.<
Frezak (GM): Bleh.
So what now?
Rhu prays to Hazz'ridan to keep Azir safe. He's really getting into this praying lark.
Rhu: Let's maybe send a single bird through THIS rift and hope that it doesn't take Griebel out again?
Apheori (GM): Considering Griebel is still out...
You could totally grab a bird and chuck it through.
Frezak (GM): I tihnk a bird is probably already through.
Since I don't think we've seen the missing one?
Ganelon: Would that be like tearing pieces of his consciousness off and throwing them into another dimension?
Apheori (GM): Quite possibly.
Ganelon: I mean, I'm not too clear on how swarms of animals... work.
Apheori (GM): Granny Weatherwax did it.
Sort of.
Frezak (GM): Well in D&D swarms can't normally split off bits.
Unless it's a result of damage or something.
Apheori (GM): Everyone: Roll perception.
Rhu:
rolling d20+11 perception chek
(
7
)
+11
=
18
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+7
(
8
)
+7
=
15
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+8
(
10
)
+8
=
18
Ganelon: Er, +1 again.
Rhu: everybody gets +1 if they're within 5 squares of me because of "Group Awareness"
Frezak (GM): Dammit.
19 for me then.
Apheori (GM): Gan: You notice some bits of metal and wood by the rift.
And a feather.
Gaurav: Haha
Apheori (GM): It's windy. And dry.
Some of Radek's coating is starting to seep into the rope.
Ganelon: Oh hell no.
I remove myself from the rope's proximity at once.
And if I can reach those bits safely, I'll head over to look at them.
Apheori (GM): So Radek drops to the ground by the rift. It's oddly charged near it, sort of like static.
The bits appear to be the remains of some shredded twigs and stuff.
Well, the wood, anyway. The metal is less clear.
It's mostly wood, though.
Ganelon: I'll take some back. Whatever's convenient to carry.
Apheori (GM): Some bits of wood and most of the metal, then.
Ganelon: Yeah.
Frezak (GM): I want to examine the metal.
See if it's future-quality.
Apheori (GM): Roll a thingy.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+8
(
13
)
+8
=
21
Apheori (GM): It seems to be, yes...
Then you realise it used to be your axe.
Rhu stays the heck away from the mysteriously draining pool and the magical whatsits, but walks up to the edge so he can better hear what the brains of the group make of it.
The Gravedigger: That was my axe.
I don't think that Azi is alive.
Rhu: If Azir is dead, we can ressurrect him from any fragment of his body, if one of those bits are fragments from his body.
If he has been teleported elsehwere or something, then no.
Frezak (GM): Do any of the bits look meaty?
Radek: Do you see any of his parts laying around?
Gaurav: I heard this on the Penny Arcade D&D game, so I don't know how true it is.
Apheori (GM): No parts lying around.
Except a feather.
...probably not Azir's.
Gaurav: haha
Frezak (GM): This is no pit of acid.
Ganelon: It's true.
Frezak (GM): Only one thing to do.
Loot Azir's stuff.
Ganelon: Yeah, I guess so.
Wen: Sword, knives, coin
Rhu looks for his religious implement -- maybe I can return it to his order, or talk to one of Hazz'ridan's priests about getting it to someone who needs it.
Wen: sarathi communicator
Rhu: his -> Azir's
Frezak (GM): Load everything into the car.
Wen: ... not sure about other stuff. General armour headgear and crap.
Frezak (GM): Actually.
Is there any water left?
Apheori (GM): You mean one of Carriya's priests?
Frezak (GM): We can always trade plate armour.
That shit's expensive.
Ganelon: We most certainly can.
Frezak (GM): especially future-forged plate.
Apheori (GM): All of the water is gone.
Well, you may have some with you.
But the sinkhole water is gone.
Frezak (GM): I mean specifically the hole water.
Apheori (GM): Ah.
Frezak (GM): I was gonna soak something in it and throw it trhough the portal to see if it would emerge unshredded.
On the off-chance that the water would had protected Azi.
But, eh.
Take his shit and bugger off.
Unless anyone has any ideas what to do here.
Gaurav: Good thinking.
Rhu looks up to see if the little tree is still glowing.
Ganelon: No ideas remain.
Apheori (GM): The tree looks like a tree, not really glowing now, but protected by magic. Normal magic. Druid magic.
Rhu: Huh.
Frezak (GM): Protected by Greibel magic or some other druid's magic?
Apheori (GM): Some other druid. Greibel is a flock of lethargic gulls.
Frezak (GM): oh.
Well that explains the warning.
Rhu: Dancing, lethargic gulls? Or have they stopped dancing?
Apheori (GM): The stopped dancing.
y
Frezak (GM): How long does your language ritual last, Gan?
Gaurav: What warning? The tree with "guard" written on it?
Frezak (GM): Yeah.
I'm guessing the tree is a meant to knock out people that try to get near the hole.
It's stopping people from getting shredded, or something.
Rhu: Strange place to put it, then. And the sign could have been clearer about which tree. We are in the middle of a forest.
Oh, maybe some of those squiggles meant "the tree that glows"
the water glowed too. Maybe it was also part of some kind of protection system?
In which case, is anybody nervous that we seem to be turning all the protection systems off?
Ganelon: A day, Frezak.
Frezak (GM): Well we could poke around and look for a druid.
And there was that shiny crap near the mutant bird.
Rhu looks up at the sky to estimate what the time of day might be.
Apheori (GM): It's around midday.
This feels wrong, somehow.
Rhu: The time feels wrong?
Apheori (GM): It should be later. Wasn't it around midday when you got here? You're not really sure.
Frezak (GM): It was?
I thought it was a few minutes trip.
Apheori (GM): You dallies around a bit. It may not have been.
Dallied.
Before going.
It seems right to Gravy, then.
But Gravy ain't Rhu.
Frezak (GM): Eh.
At this point anything that feels wrong is probably right.
Ganelon: Everything is quite wrong.
Frezak (GM): So, what now?
Ganelon: Dunno! To the town?
Gaurav: I thought we left the inn at dawn, hung out with the villagers for 30 mins, and then took no more than an hour to get here. So midday sounds about right to me, too.
Rhu: I would agree with going to town, but ... since we're here, shouldn't we investigate this rift? It might have something to do with Sarathi. Reality breaking down and all that. Although to be honest, this rift is much better behaved than Sarathi was.
The Gravedigger: What can we do with this?
I've no idea.
Rhu: Poke it with a stick? See if it destroys the stick, any how.
The Gravedigger: Well it fucked up my axe.
You try something.
Apheori (GM): I bet Radek has even fancier ideas.
Ganelon: Distracted. One sec.
Rhu: I'm going to throw stones at it.
Rhu throws stones at the rift.
Ganelon: As a player I actually haven't got many.
I don't have a ritual for this.
Apheori (GM): The first couple are shredded. Another bounces off. One of them just sort of disappears.
You could throw magic dust at it or something.
...I dunno.
Ganelon: Magic dust is crazy valuable.
I can't get it just anywhere.
Apheori (GM): I mean you have other things that might react differently, or specially, or something.
Ganelon: Hm.
Apheori (GM): You could totally establish a spectrum of reagents and then perform a binary search on the effects to discern a... thingy.
Thing.
Apheori (GM) babbles.
Ganelon: Hm.
Rhu prays to Hazz'ridan for wisdom in dealing correctly with this dangerous rift.
Ganelon: I will use... my daily.
Frezak (GM): The eyebot?
Apheori (GM): Daily?
Rhu: Here's what I have: an old journal (which maybe Radek can read now that our minds have been restored), a ceramic tile from the village roof, a half-digested light fixture
and a string of beads left on my car seat this morning
Apheori (GM): Rhu: Dammit, why could you not have been a cleric?
Rhu: Because we already had a leader
Ganelon: Okay.
Rhu examines the string of beads closely.
Ganelon: This is the Punishing Eye.
In combat, it is a robot that flies around and zaps enemies when you guys attack them.
I will use it as a camera.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+7 religion check to see if the beads have any religious significance
(
3
)
+7
=
10
Ganelon: May I do this?
Gaurav: To be fair, there isn't a *whole* lot a cleric can do on paper than I can't do. Our main power is abjure undead.
Frezak (GM): Clerics heal, Avengers smite, basically.
Gaurav: I think the DM is hinting that we should be trying the things we have. The eye might just get disintegrated like me stones.
Frezak (GM): Flavour-wise, they're both holy guys that do shit for thier god.
Gaurav: Yes, but religiously. I have a +7 religion check; a cleric might be a bit higher, but not a _huge_ difference.
Ganelon: Well, my other option is basically to attack it with arcane magic.
Frezak (GM): Actually, no.
The Cleric in my game has very low religion, since it's an Int skill.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: The rift is a dead end. This is a world of dead ends, with ends getting ever deader as time goes on. Hazz'ridan should be pleased, but he is not, for they are not his dead ends. They are something else entirely, and this is very, very bad. You should get to the bottom of it, because the other gods seem inclined to utterly ignore it and you're the first mortal of his to have even gone near it.
Ganelon: Yeah, but she's also kinda just winging it.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: The beads might hold such significance. You're not sure, but there is a bit of magic about them. It could be divine.
Gan: You can totally do the eye thing. What happens if it gets wrecked, though?
Frezak (GM): But generally clerics don't have more than 12 Int.
He has infinite eyes.
He can just make another over the course of the day.
Ganelon: I can rebuild it, but tomorrow.
Apheori (GM): Excellent for him.
Okay.
Ganelon: It sees nothing after entering the rift?
Frezak (GM): WILBUR
GO FORTH
Apheori (GM): Did you do that?
Gaurav: Ah, true.
hahaha
Apheori (GM): Roll a thing first if it even gets into the rift. >.<
Sorry.
Ganelon: A d20?
Apheori (GM): Sure, I dunno.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
1
)
=
1
Pfft.
Apheori (GM): It bounces off.
GOOD JOB.
Rhu: Oh phew.
Ganelon: Can I... recover it?
Rhu: Try again?
Apheori (GM): Can those things survive hitting the ground? Because if so, why not.
Frezak (GM): There are rules for the.. resistance of Constructs.
it's tough.
It can take a couple of lasers or fireballs.
Apheori (GM): Give it another go, then.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
12
)
=
12
Apheori (GM): IT GOES IN.
Ganelon: The daily aspect of this thing assumes it's run out of power after shooting lasers at things for an entire fight.
So it's pretty sturdy but runs out of... I guess some kind of magical battery quite fast.
The entire thing is far from irreplaceable, though.
Apheori (GM): How does it see?
Rhu: Woo!
Ganelon: I'd like to say, through a camera.
I mean, the game only cares about how it fights, and it operates independent of me controlling it there.
Apheori (GM): What kind of camera?
Okay, so it flies in and is sort of surrounded by horrible darkness. It's horrible, right?
It's just floating in horrible.
Ganelon: A... magical one? Lenses and all that, certainly, but it has to "think" for itself.
Apheori (GM): It flies around the horrible, encountering more horrible darkness.
Ganelon: And that part is most definitely magical.
Apheori (GM): I assume it's reporting back to you somehow?
Ganelon: Yeah.
So if that connection remains unbroken, I would experience the horrible.
Frezak (GM): Great.
Apheori (GM): Neat.
It bounces off something.
Then there's light everywhere and it's tumbling through the light.
It's on a beach.
Sand. Sea. Palm trees.
Ganelon: Any signs of our poor paladin?
Apheori (GM): Pile of dead spikey sea creatures nearby.
Rhu: Any ... giant fish?
Apheori (GM): Tracks belonging to... well, you have no idea, but they ain't his.
No giant fish..
Radek: Fascinating. Also, horrible.
But it does seem that some manner of stable environment exists on the other side of this rift.
Apheori (GM): Also the palm trees are dead.
Like they were just dried out suddenly.
So it wasn't immediately apparent.
Radek: It's in no better shape.
The Gravedigger: Not much use unless you have idea how to get trhough safely.
Since being shredded is still possible.
Apheori (GM): The rift on this side is enormous.
The Gravedigger: And I don't want to be shredded.
Radek: ...Oh my.
We're looking at a much larger hole on the other side.
Apheori (GM): It stretches across the beach, into the waves, which just sort of slice around it, and up the sky and overhead.
The light is darker than it should be , and getting darker, shifting to purple...
Reality folds in on itself.
Ganelon: ...Communications cut?
Gaurav: Reality on that side or this side?
Ganelon: I should sincerely hope that one.
Apheori (GM): That side.
And, well, everything is dark. But you think it's still there. Somewhere.
Gaurav: Phew.
Radek: We... are going to want to close this.
And I'm going to need a new robot.
(To Rhu): You definitely want to close this. You god has very nearly commanded it. Or as close as he ever gets to commanding anything.
Apheori (GM): The darkness this time is different from the previous one.
It appears to just be a dark... room?
Gaurav: Hazz'ridan would see a dead end here where the roads cut across space and time. We must close this.
Ganelon: Hm.
Gaurav: Er, that was supposed to be Rhu, sorry.
Ganelon: I'll have it shoot the laser. That ought to produce light.
Rhu: He wills it.
Apheori (GM): The laser reveals it to be a large cave, full of stalagtagamiteses.
...you know what I mean.
Ganelon: I do.
Radek: First a beach, now a cave...
Apheori (GM): There's no visible rift here, but the space around seems to ripple in shimmer in the light before it goes out.
Ganelon: Well, it can't exactly power the weapon for long enough to really get anywhere as a source of light.
Apheori (GM): Does it move?
Ganelon: I suppose, while it's still active.
Apheori (GM): As it moves it encounters pockets of more and less resistance. The air is funny, but also the space is funny.
Then it passes through a thinner patch and it's somewhere else once again.
This looks like Sarathi. Same style of architecture, same sort of technology, at least. It's in a building, in an open area full of tables and rubble and sunlight.
Some overgrown plants reach toward the openings in the walls and ceiling.
The connection, however, is getting tenuous at best, as though it has been getting further and further away with each passage...
Ganelon: Let's see if it can get outside and take a look at the sky.
Before we lose it.
Apheori (GM): It heads out one of the holes in the wall, revealing a vista that very definitely is Sarathi. This city, however, it utterly demolished. Few buildings remain past their foundations, as though they had collapsed after a a great battle.
The sky, however, is ordinary enough. A bit of a smoky haze lies around the horizons. Billowy clouds drift overhead.
Three moons are also visible.
But didn't Sarathi only have two moons?
Ganelon: Interesting.
Well, there's certainly nowhere for the thing to go.
Gaurav: Look for more holes? It looks like there's a place -- the beach -- where all the holes intersect, and there's a little hole here and a big one (or many little ones?) on Sarathi but maybe the beach world is where we'll have to go to shut this whole thing down.
Ganelon: If there's even anything left of it by the time we get there.
Frezak (GM): I'm not going into any of those unless I'm sure i'm not going to end up as Purina Gravy.
Gaurav: We could close up this hole and then go look for Sarathi again, see if we can figure out how to close the hole situation there. It's a band-aid solution, but fixing all of space and time seems a bit beyond a bunch of level 1 adventurers anyway.
Ganelon: Well, we
Apheori (GM): Oh, that reminds me. You should all level up.
Ganelon: We've gotta KILL THINGS to level, usually
Although solving mysteries is another way.
Frezak (GM): The chickens were already dead.
Apheori (GM): Gan: You lose the connection entirely. The thing is gone.
Radek: Blast.
Well, it reached Sarathi, and the sky was much more agreeable this time.
The place is utterly destroyed. Although, I wouldn't assume that it discovered the planet at the same "present" we are enjoying right now.
Rhu: Yes. I think we should try to close this hole now, then see if we can't find a city and report back to HQ on all this holes business.
Radek: I don't think there *is* a city to find here.
We should count ourselves lucky if this planet is simply underdeveloped, and not in the past itself.
The Gravedigger: Any of what you'd call technology on this world is not native.
Rhu: Oh, right. The past.
Apheori (GM): There's a bit of a gurgling bubbling noise.
Rhu looks around for the source of the noise
Apheori (GM): Water has started seeping back into the hole.
Ganelon: Huh.
I'll gladly take a sample of that.
Rhu: From where?
Ganelon: I assume from below.
Apheori (GM): Yeah, you're like in the bottom of this deep hole basin thing.
It's seeping back out of the bottom.
Not very quickly, though.
But enough to be gurgly.
Frezak (GM): Is the water... weird at all?
Glowing?
Smell funny?
Apheori (GM): It's muddy. Looks normal.
Smells a bit like sulfur.
Sulphur in english?
Oh, whatever.
Frezak (GM): Did it smell like that before?
Apheori (GM): Not really.
Frezak (GM): Hmm.
Ganelon: Either form is acceptable.
I'll still take some just to be sure.
Gaurav: We don't know: Radek was the only one close enough to smell it, and he doesn't smell.
Frezak (GM): So we've learnt that the hole goes somewhere else.
That there are holes of different sizes. Possibly interconnected.
Rhu: Hazz'ridan, God of Dead Ends, is displeased by this state of affairs and would like us to close this hole. He would like this very, very much.
The Gravedigger: Well maybe he could tell us how.
Else he can go bury himself.
Rhu: I'll ask him.
Rhu prays to Hazz'ridan, maker of ends, for wisdom in the ways of closing rifts in space and time.
Apheori (GM): Hazz'ridan says he has no fucking idea and frankly this is the first time anyone has even gotten this far with the whole mess.
Radek: I couldn't care less what your god would like us to do, but in the interests of my own survival, I'm closing this hole.
Gaurav: Do I hear his hallowed voice in my head, or does everybody hear it bellow across the land?
Apheori (GM): In your head.
Hazz'ridan also says you should try to find out.
Rhu: Hazz'ridan is alas unable to help us, but encourages us to find a way. He says nobody else has ever gotten this far to sorting this mess out so I guess we're ahead of the crowd there.
Apheori (GM): And then maybe if you could be so good as to beat Kyrule over the head with it, everything can go back to fine and normal with good and proper dead ends like there are supposed to be.
The Gravedigger: So your god is as clueless as us.
WHoop-dee-doo.
Rhu mutters "Amen." to Hazz'ridan under his breath.
Radek: So we need to do all the work ourselves. Nothing new there.
Apheori (GM): Where'd everyone go?
Ganelon: I didn't go anywhere.
Apheori (GM): It says you did. o_O
Ghuh. Is Gaurav still here too?
Okay.
Gaurav: Yup!
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Rhu: But seriously, get to the bottom of it, he says. It spans worlds, universes, that were never meant to be connected. You have been pulled from your own and that you wound up here is a greater blessing than you could have imagined. You are not alone here, and this shall not be your dead end.
HE'S HELPED YOU NOW.
Apheori (GM) glares at the app thingy.
The Gravedigger: Well do you have any idea HOW to close it, Radek?
Rhu repeats this to the group
Radek: None. Dealing in spatial instabilities is a hobby of mine at best.
Apheori (GM): Also you
're standing in a layer of water now.
Maybe ankle deep.
Rhu walks out of the hole
Apheori (GM): You need to get into the car.
Rhu gets into the car.
Rhu: Amadi seemed to know a thing or two. I wonder if we could get her back somehow. Maybe if we could figure out where Midnight was.
Or when.
Rhu gets into the driving seat.
Frezak (GM): I'll get back into the car too.
Ganelon: Ditto.
Apheori (GM): The seagulls are asleep, wrapped in porridge.
Radek: Well, she didn't show up while I was working.
Apheori (GM): According to the mechanics, what happens to Greibel's stuff when he's seagulls?
Rhu: Aw. Porridge gulls.
Ganelon: It becomes a part of his form.
Apheori (GM): Ah.
Ganelon: Armor still protects him but not shields. It's... weird.
Apheori (GM): Huh.
Frezak (GM): he drops handheld items that are not Implements.
So anything that's not a staff or Totem for him.
Ganelon: I can see why they did it, because otherwise you'd have no end of trouble picking up all your junk every single fight, but still.
Apheori (GM): So potentially there's a bong and crap under the pile of porridge-wrapped gulls?
Or is a bong an implement?
Gaurav: It should be for him, I think :)
Frezak (GM): He probably does have Bong Proficiency.
Ganelon: Yeah. Bong Expertise even, I dare say.
But maybe not Bong Focus
Apheori (GM): Okay, then.
Everyone roll perception.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+8
(
11
)
+8
=
19
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+7+1
(
15
)
+7+1
=
23
Frezak (GM): DAMMIT ANother +1 >.>
Apheori (GM): For some reason the rift seems to be trying to twist away from the water. Like it doesn't like it.
Gaurav:
rolling d20+11 perception check
(
8
)
+11
=
19
Apheori (GM): You guys noticed this.
GOOD JOB.
Ganelon: I have some of this water, yeah?
Frezak (GM): Feels great to have a perception skill for once.
Apheori (GM): Yes you do.
Ganelon: Alright. I'm not throwing it away or anything.
Just making sure.
Frezak (GM): Soak a gull in water and throw it in.
Rhu: Huh. Is the rift low enough that it would have been under water when we got here?
Apheori (GM): It was definitely under water when you got here.
It's near the bottom of the hole.
Frezak: Do you do that?
Frezak (GM): Not if peeps tell me not to.
Rhu: If we just stand back and do nothing, the water is going to cover it in a bit anyway.
And we don't have to sacrifice part of Greibel's soul
Frezak (GM): SO how do we close it?
I'll fill a bottle with this water and fling it into the portal.
Rhu: So: the rift was covered in water it dislikes and with a tree overhead to "guard" it or something. But it didn't work, because this planet has had a bad time of it. So: maybe us uncovering it made it worse? Maybe together they can't be destroyed but once the rift is unprotected it can be? So many questions.
We could go back to the village and try to find someone who understands this better than us.
Radek: It's as good a place to start as any.
Apheori (GM): The bottle bounces off and lands in the rest of the water.
Frezak (GM): Hmm.
I'll get the bottle back.
Grab one of the bits of wood. Get that nice and wet.
And toss THAT in.
Gaurav: The DM also suggested earlier that we might already have something that affects the rift in some way. Should we try those before we leave?
Apheori (GM): It goes in.
Frezak (GM): Dammit;
I forgot that sometimes things go in and sometimes they don't, regardles off what they are.
Ganelon: Things I have:
Rhu: Maybe they go in if they're wetted with this watery thing?
- A half digested light fixture (see "Rhu pockets the light fixture." in log)
- An old journal from the better reality
- A ceramic shingle from the Communist village
- A string of beads left for us on the driving seat of CAR
Hey, Radek, do you want to try reading the journal again, now that Hazz'ridan has cleared our minds and allowed us to see the rift?
Apheori (GM): Snrk.
Ganelon: - Bombs
- Vials of Alchemist's Fire
- Magic Dust
- Bodily Fluids of a Small Dragon
Frezak (GM): I have... Booze?
Names, is my Booze Shalott or just booze?
Ganelon: I consider all of those things valuable, so I don't want to just go tossing them into a hole-of-no-return all willy-nilly.
Apheori (GM): The water continues to rise, and as someone predicted, finally hits the rift regardless of its vague attempts to avoid it.
The rippling effect spreads through the water, filling it with odd shards of wrongness, as though the water itself took on the properties of the rift.
Ganelon: And I guess I'll take a look at the journal, but I predict zero odds of success.
Ooh, interesting. I want some of that too.
Apheori (GM): Frezak: Your booze is magic potions you haven't identifies.
And there's the shalott that went bad, but I dunno who had that.
Ganelon: I told someone to take the bottle.
Apheori (GM): You set aside the journal and get a sample of the weird water, though as it's detached from the rest it goes back to looking the same as ever. This may or may not mean anything.
Ganelon: It means the world to me.
As in "the world is doomed, oh gods".
Rhu: This world seems to be doing okay for now. But whether that's because of the water or inspite of the water remains to be seen.
The Gravedigger: We'd need to check out another hole.
Rhu: Ooooh. I like this plan.
The other idea I had was that we could bust up that glowing tree up there and see if anybody comes to fix it.
Apheori (GM): At some point in all of this Rhu flew y'all out of the hole.
I need you all to roll d20s.
Radek: What is the tree doing?
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
3
)
=
3
Rhu: uh oh
rolling d20
(
7
)
=
7
Ganelon: I'm really not doing great with these.
Gaurav: Gan: you just flew a robot through a rift into probably two separate alternate universes and tied us back into our starting storyline. I think you're allowed a couple of lousy rolls.
The Gravedigger:
rolling 1D20
(
6
)
=
6
Ganelon: Good point.
I love that little robot.
Apheori (GM): Okay, so y'all feel the hole calling to you again, and getting stronger the more it fills.
The water is full of shimmers.
But it's not overpowering, and not compelling you to actually do anything.
You just feel it and recognise it.
Rhu: We should maybe get out of here.
Apheori (GM): Although I must say, this could have been really, really bad.
Rhu: Before it gets any stronger.
Radek: Please do.
Gaurav: What could?
Apheori (GM): THIS.
Apheori (GM) cackles.
Rhu takes us 20ft into the air and drives us in the direction of the village.
Gaurav: This roll? This tree? This rift?
This CAR?
Apheori (GM): The situation.
Nevermind.
You see that weird bird with its sparkly things again.
Frezak (GM): Shoot the bird.
Ganelon: I totally could, but why?
Frezak (GM): So we can take it's stuff.
Might be money or gear.
Apheori (GM): Also it's mutated.
And like really big.
Frezak (GM): AND I WANT TO KILL THINGS.
How big?
Apheori (GM): Uh...
Gaurav: We have gone awfully long time without attacking anything :-/
Apheori (GM): Maybe a few meters.
Gaurav: ...
I'm sure we could go back to the village and hunt like wild boar or something
Apheori (GM): Actually I don't know.
Frezak (GM): I'm pretty sure that was not mentioned the first time we saw it.
Apheori (GM): I can't remember.
Frezak (GM): I'm pretty sure I would not suggest attacking a bird that's bigger than I am.
Gaurav: The log says: "It's very large, missing a bunch of feathers, and has too many limbs."
Apheori (GM): Okay, it's probably not that big, but it does... look big.
Frezak (GM): FINE.
We'll leave it alone >.>
Apheori (GM): You're no fun.
Gaurav: Is it near its nest? I think we saw its nest last time?
Apheori (GM): It's sitting on a pile of shiny things.
...yes.
Rhu: Hmm. Last time, we suggested that Griebel turn into a flock of birds and distract it while we value it's nest. We could try that again.
Gaurav: I believe Frezak's exact words were "A flock of sexy mutant birds", so there's that.
Ganelon: Hm...
Apheori (GM): Unfortunately Greibel still seems to be out of it.
Ganelon: Yeah, it'd be nice if BSG were actually here.
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Instead you have a pile of gently swaying seagulls in the back seat.
Gaurav: o.0
Apheori (GM): And no use for them.
Frezak (GM): Would be nice to have an Azi >.>
TO kill things.
So... Back to the willage, then.
Unless we want to just recon the area.
Gaurav: Yeah, why not.
Ganelon: To what, returning or recon?
I will shoot this bird if that's what you guys want.
Gaurav: Reconning. We have a car. At the village we're just going to tell tall tales of our adventures and get some sleep.
Frezak (GM): I don't think firing at a meter or two long bird is a good idea.
Sleep?
It's just afternoon, no?
Apheori (GM): Right.
Gaurav: We could just drive around and see if we spot anything. I assume that we've now driven around this area enough that we're unlikely to get lost.
Frezak (GM): Getting lost from the air is tough.
Gaurav: Also true.
Frezak (GM): Yeah, let's just get an idea of what's where and see if we can spot any landmarks or stuff that might be interesting.
Gaurav: Let's do it.
Ganelon: Okay.
Apheori (GM): YOU RECONOTATIFICISE!
Rhu drives the car around the big tree in wide circles a couple of times, looking for anything interesting on the ground.
Rhu:
rolling d20+11 perception check
(
11
)
+11
=
22
Apheori (GM): There's a big dry river over there. Some mountains in the distance which look like they might have some real life on them.
There's a whole lot of desert in the other direction.
It's just dead and desolate and horrible and oh, look, dee-like things.
deer
Ganelon: Does it count as poaching if those laws were invented in the future?
Rhu: are the deers several meters across? If not, we could hunt them.
Apheori (GM): You also see a lot of windmills around the village you'd been at before. Apparently they hadn't had the sails up at the time.
They look like... deer-like things.
Frezak (GM): yeah, we can just drive and have Radek shoot 'em.
Apheori (GM): Deer-sized, at least.
Rhu: It's only poaching if somebody already owns them. And it's only "getting caught for poaching" if you can't shoot your way out.
Frezak (GM): We can kill it.
I'd have a good chance of telling whether it's edible.
Ganelon: This would probably be fun if Radek weren't such a grump.
Air-car hunting.
Frezak (GM): And /I/ know how to prepare food that doesn't come out of a tube/box/machine.
I'll make the yee-haw shouts as needed.
I need a hat.
Apheori (GM): You could put the journal on your head.
Rhu: NO! Who knows what deep secrets this journal may hide? We must treat it with respect.
Ganelon: I TAKE AIM
Radek: Intact body, right?
Apheori (GM): This is your friendly nagging voice reminding you that my commendary is not necessarily worth commenting on. Also you might want to actually check those secrets at some point.
ROLL AN ATTACK THINGY.
The Gravedigger: Yeah.
You can pop the head or bleed it out, though.
Frezak (GM): What DOES your gun fire?
Ganelon: I'll read the journal when I can recast this language ritual.
Frezak (GM): Was it bullets or laser?
Ganelon: I said as much when we first tried to read it.
It was bullets, because they're modular.
Ie: acid bullets, which I will not use on a deer.
Frezak (GM): Brill.
Apheori (GM): Roll or something.
Ganelon: [Weapon Attack - Rifle]
rolling 1d20+3+5+0
(
4
)
+3+5+0
=
12
BAH
HUMBUG
Apheori (GM): You missed.
Ganelon: RELOAD.
Frezak (GM): I need spare axes.
Ganelon: I need loaded dice.
Frezak (GM): I have a grappling hook and rope.
Can i throw that?
Because that's the perfect flying car hunting weapon.
Apheori (GM): You totally can. XD
Frezak (GM): HERE GOES
rolling 1D20+4
(
16
)
+4
=
20
Ka-chung.
Hello, lunch.
Radek: Showoff.
The Gravedigger: YEEEE-HAAAWWWW
Rhu: :D
Apheori (GM): You wind up with a kicking, screaming dear on your lap.
Frezak (GM): Oh no.
It's hanging from the car.
The Gravedigger: Pull up!
Rhu pulls up
Apheori (GM): Oh, where's the fun in that?
Lap is where you want it.
Frezak (GM): I'll headbutt it to death then.
Apheori (GM): Like what happens when you hit one on the road and it comes in the windshield...
Snrk.
Okay, so Rhu pulls it up and Gravy headbutts it todeath.
Yeah, I can see this.
Frezak (GM): THose guys probably think that headbutting how hunters used to do it in the olden days :p
"It's an ancient, accredited technique. Shut up."
Apheori (GM): Yeah. So that happens.
Ganelon: We have a dead deer-like.
Apheori (GM): So you're in the car, sailing over the prairie, deer in your lap after headbutting it to death.
And a pile of seagulls in the back seat.
The Gravedigger: Now, a spot to gut and clean this.
Any rivers?
Apheori (GM): They all seem to be dry.
Gaurav: Somebody needs to make a postcard with that image. "Greetings from that place we went to after Sarathi!"
Ganelon: I can just imagine Radek looking really grumpy with his rifle over his shoulder.
And deer blood all over Gravy's grinning face.
Apheori (GM): Snrk.
Frezak (GM): Gravy's enjoying himself now.
No rivers?
Well, crud.
Gaurav: We do know a pool with water-like stuff in it. Probably best to take it back to the village, though. They'll have water. Somewhere.
Frezak (GM): Sure.
Gaurav: Unless you want to keep reconning
I guess there's enough place to put a deer in CAR?
Frezak (GM): We tie it to the front, of course.
Ganelon: Well, we're missing one paladin worth of space.
Gaurav: hah. this is true. someone give that deer a pair of dark glasses and lets keep exploring. I'd like to follow one of those dry river beds for a bit and see if we can find some outlet.
Frezak (GM): We could have it trail on a rope and tie one of the laser-proof capes to it.
Ganelon: Works for me.
Frezak (GM): Yeah, find out where the water is.
Apheori (GM): Which way do you head?
Rhu drives the car to the closest dry river bed, then follow it downhill.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
You follow the riverbed through the plains and desert.
It sort of randomly switches between the two.
Then it gets like a canyon. Still dry, but deeper. Then it goes underground - you fly over a ridge and crap and find more canyon further down.
There some water in it.
A wee little trickle.
Apheori (GM): Keep following?
Rhu: Oooh!
Yes. I think we'll follow the river for maybe two hours? See where we get to? That should give us enough time to get back.
Frezak (GM): Sure.
We're in no rush, are we?
Maybe flyby the hole when we head back, in case Azi reappeared.
Else, yeah, just keep following this.
Ganelon: We still have plenty of time before I can no longer speak to those villagers.
We'd have to have stayed up throughout the entire night for that.
Rhu drives us on for two hours since we started following the river.
Apheori (GM): The river gets bigger, mountains sort of rise around it, it goes through some hills, snakes around some much greener area, and gets a whole lot larger very suddenly.
Rhu: Pretty! No water, though?
Apheori (GM): There's definitely water. There's a big old river, with tributaries and everything!
You haven't reached where it dumps, though, no.
Frezak (GM): Maybe stop for a bit now to make dinner?
Or lunch or whatever.
Apheori (GM): FOOOD.
Frezak (GM): In-game.
Apheori (GM): Okay. You want to roast your deer?
Rhu: Might be a better idea to bring the deer back to the villagers. On the other hand, they might not like us hunting their deer.
Frezak (GM): Yeah, cut it up, wash it, get rid of the offall...
Apheori (GM): It's totally around dinner time by now.
Frezak (GM): have some legs.
Bring the rest back to the willage.
Ganelon: I don't suppose I could just consume its soul, huh?
Rhu: Oh yeah, that works.
Ganelon: But, you know, not to be evil or anything.
It's just easier to eat that way.
Rhu: Less messy, too.
Ganelon: Waste no part of the animal and all, y'know.
Yeah, you've got the meat, bones, organs, and blood, but what about the life?
That's where the old man comes in.
Apheori (GM): Do you really consume souls of things?
Ganelon: No, probably not.
Apheori (GM): Aww.
Gaurav: Wouldn't the soul have left the body when the deer died?
Apheori (GM): Did you remember to cast soul trap first?
Ganelon: It would require a spiritual view on life rather than a scientific one for Radek to think of extracting the... "being" of an animal and sustain himself with it.
Apheori (GM): Ah, heh.
Indeed.
Well, you don't need me to roast deer, so I'ma grab some food too.
Ganelon: More likely he'd just extract nutrients and discard the useless flesh afterwards.
Gaurav: What would happen if you ate the soul of a creature without killing the body? The mind boggles.
Chewy.
Ganelon: I dunno.
Frezak (GM): In D&D?
Ganelon: I mean, death of the body.
Frezak (GM): You just get a... mindless person.
An awake but not concious body.
Ganelon: Oh?
Frezak (GM): Yarr.
Ganelon: I guess it couldn't really feed itself, though.
Frezak (GM): Nope.
Gaurav: Creepy.
Frezak (GM): It'd just stand there.
Or sit.
Or whatever position it was in when you sucked the soul out.
Ganelon: Well, anyway, that's what Radek does with his share of the kill.
He efficiently sucks out everything strictly beneficial about it and injects himself with that, leaving an awful, flavorless slab of dry meat behind.
Frezak (GM): Ew.
Ganelon: It's how I'd eat if I were able.
Apheori (GM): XD
That slab of meat would make for a good practical joke, I imagine.
Frezak (GM): It probably looks... icky.
Grey.
Dry.
DEAD.
Ganelon: "This... this is literally just matter."
Frezak (GM): It's the corpse of food.
Ganelon: "How did you even manage to make a flank of meat so unappetizing?"
Gaurav: Food corpse!
Ganelon: "I'd be impressed if I weren't so underwhelmed by the taste. Even the texture is just... awful."
Apheori (GM): And the rest of you? What do you all do?
Frezak (GM): I eat a leg of deerthing.
Gaurav: Are we going to cook it first?
Frezak (GM): Sure.
I thought we did.
Gaurav: Then I too eat a leg of deerthing.
Apheori (GM): It was unclear. Now it is clear.
Ganelon: I guess we could feed the gulls, too.
Frezak (GM): With meat giblets?
Ganelon: Are they even carnivores? Whatever, I'm sure Greibel can deal with it.
Gaurav: Gulls are omnivores I think.
Frezak (GM): They are.
Ganelon: Then yeah. We could even make a game out of it, assuming they were responsive enough to eat at all.
Apheori (GM): They seem to be. They're just not acting at all... intelligent.
Frezak (GM): Yah, just throw them meatbits.
Throw 'em deer thing bits and let's get exploratoring.
Radek: Do you suppose his core intelligence was destroyed and we're simply feeding the instinct-driven remains of his "body"?
The porridge: Or he could just be really stoned.
Frezak (GM): DAMN
Rhu: I'm sure he'll be back. Once he remembers how.
Frezak (GM): SORRY
MISCLICKED
Radek: I've never paid much mind to druids.
Frezak (GM): That was Gravy >.>
Gaurav: That could have been the very best interjection of all time :)
Rhu continues driving us along the river until our two hours is up, then turns the car around and drives us back to the village.
Radek: They're always going on about nature, like it holds secrets we haven't exhausted millennia ago.
A worthless profession, druidism.
Ganelon: Apologies to any druids in the audience who may be offended by my fictional character's opinions.
The Gravedigger: Could be a passtime.
Radek: For this one?
Apheori (GM): Wait! Wait!
Rhu: I don't know about that, Radek. A druid set up the little tree at the rift, and possibly also the waterlike thing. Maybe once we convince Greibel to unbirdify, we could get his opinion on the magic underlying them.
Apheori (GM): If you keep going down the river, you find something. Do you keep going down the river after eating, or turn back?
It's getting dark again.
Rhu: Let's get back before it gets too dark.
Frezak (GM): If it's getting dark, we'll probably start heading back.
Ganelon: Yeah, unless this is some very important clue.
Even then, we could easily justify heading back to the one place with water again later.
Rhu: Yes. And possibly with a human Greibel and a non-vanished Azir.
Apheori (GM): Okay, you turn back. You don't even know how far you've gone, but whatever. You can do it again. Totally.
Y'ALL SAIL OVER THE ARID LAND, OVER IT ALL LIKE A BIRD, MAN!
...sorry.
Gaurav: Biiiiiiiiiiiiirdmaaaaaaan
Apheori (GM): It's dark by the time you get back to where you found the deer. You see the lights of the village in the distance, and they seem to be the only lights around at all, though you couldn't even see where you were anymore...
You head to the sinkhole?
Rhu: Hmm. Do you think the lights will stay on long enough for us to find our way back? Of course, if we have to set up camp by the sinkhole or something, we can do that.
Ganelon: Just for a peek.
I'm not there to say hello to the hole.
Rhu: Okay.
Rhu drives us back to the sinkhole for a quick look
Ganelon: How are things looking?
Apheori (GM): ...glowing.
Ganelon: Worse? The same?
Apheori (GM): Seriously glowing.
Gaurav: Jus thte little tree and the pool? Or something else also?
Apheori (GM): I mean, as far as you can tell it's all back to the way it was when you first arrived... but in the darkness it's really glowing.
The tree. The water.
The air around it.
Tendrils in the rocks around.
As though the glow has been seeping through the ground and coming up in places...
Ganelon: Very troublesome.
Frezak (GM): SORRY AZIR.
GOOD LUCK.
Rhu: He'll be back. And - and - and he'll be glowing. It'll be awesome. You'll see.
Apheori (GM): No sign of Azir or the other bird. No sign of bones.
But man, is it glowing.
Frezak (GM): can Radek learn anything about this?
Ganelon: From where we are?
Apheori (GM): The glowing stuff is in the air. Sort of like mist, some blowing away in the evening breeze, bot mostly just lingering.
You could totally fly into some of it.
Radek: Get me closer. In the air is fine.
Bear Soup Guy is here >_<
Rhu drives the car closer
Frezak (GM): BEAR SOUP GUY
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+10 Arcana
(
19
)
+10
=
29
Rhu: If Greibel was around, we could get him to look at the shining tree branch and see if he can work out what druidic magic made it. But alas ...
Rhu motions at the flock of seagulls in the back of the car
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Apheori (GM): BSG: Greibel is seagulls. Has been for awhile. Nobody knows what's wrong.
The question is... what is wrong?
YOU PUSHED THIS QUESTION.
Wen: He fell asleep when the birds did.
okay I'll shut up now >_>
Bear Soup Guy: Clearly he came into contact with...bad fumes...from the transformation of the porridge...yessssss.....
Ganelon: Radek theorized that you lost the bird that was your druid-swarm-control-cluster and thus became a flock of unintelligent birds.
Apheori (GM): Radek: Arcana says it's totally... nothing.
Gaurav: Rasputin the Porridge has been nursing you back from health after your encounter with the tree.
Apheori (GM): It says it doesn't exist.
Bear Soup Guy: :O
yay porridge ^_^
Apheori (GM): Greibel lost a gull.
Poor gull.
Frezak (GM): Could it be an illusion?
Fake light?
Gaurav:
rolling 1d20+7 religion check: I pray silently to Hazz'ridan and ask for any idea about what all the shining is about.
(
19
)
+7
=
26
Bear Soup Guy: YOU ARE GOD
RELIGION EYES
Radek: This is...
Ganelon: Can I attempt to cast magic while in this zone?
I am worried it may be impossible.
Gaurav: BSG: dude you have no idea. Get back into human form so I can tell you of all the wondrous encounters I have had with my god this day.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: Hazz says to keep asking questions. Don't ignore it.
Zone?
You mean this general area?
You can totally attempt to cast magic.
Bear Soup Guy: Okie dokie
Ganelon: Yeah. Just to see if I can.
Bear Soup Guy: Suddenly Greibel's seagulls melt together and turn into Greibel?
Apheori (GM): Suddenly, Greibel!
Apheori (GM): Greibel: d20
Gaurav: A wild Greibel appears!
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20
(
18
)
=
18
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You have a headache, you don't really know what's going on, and you feel... disjoint. Like you're not really there. You're not really anywhere else, but you're not really entirely there, either.
Rhu: GREIBEL!
Greibel: Hmmmmmmmmm...?
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You feel a sense of... cheese? And ice. And hear the crash of waves... before it fades away into a whisper in the back of your mind...
Greibel rubs his head
The Gravedigger: Oh, hey Greibel.
Apheori (GM): Gan: Magic works.
Greibel licks his lips at the thought of ice cheese
Radek sighs in relief.
Apheori (GM): What did you try to do?
Rhu: Greibel: you're not ... vegetarian, are you?
Greibel: What an interesting question to ask...
Bear Soup Guy: brb
Ganelon: I can suck the heat out of the area around someone (it's not harmful to them, merely things nearby) or blast stuff away from them with... sound.
The former seems safer.
And less noisy.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Ganelon: For an artificer, Radek is pretty heavy on the mechanical side as opposed to the magical one.
He uses bullets and robots far more than raw magic.
Frezak (GM): I... have a shovel.
Apheori (GM): Only one?
Ganelon: You're also damn near impossible to kill. I consider that important.
Frezak (GM): I have no magic!
BUT IT CAN TAKE THIS TRUCK TO MY FACE
*thud*
Ow.
Apheori (GM): It?
Frezak (GM): Eh, I can't type for toffee.
Apheori (GM): Ah.
Dammit, BSG...
Gaurav: Who's offering toffee for typing? Tell me more.
Frezak (GM): I cannot.
I'm bound by mystic oaths.
Also a guy said he's shoot me if I told.
Gaurav: Some day I shall learn these secrets for myself.
Frezak (GM): And then get shot.
Apheori (GM): Getting shot is part of life.
So what do you guys do?
Ganelon: Go back to the village.
Apheori (GM): You head back. Everyone's inside.
Ganelon: I'll have to explain to the innkeeper that I won't be speaking her language, literally, when we wake up.
Frezak (GM): TO THE INN.
Rhu locks CAR up for the night and heads to the inn.
Ganelon: And unless she has a big storeroom full of magic junk for me to destroy, I likely won't be able to afford fixing that.
Rhu: Who's bringing in the deer?
Frezak (GM): I'll carry the remaning deer bits.
Have Radek explain that they're for the kitchen if she can do anything with it.
And hope to FUCK there's no taboo against killing deerthings here.
Apheori (GM): Snrk.
Bear Soup Guy: SORRY SORRY
My mom was telling me about important stuff
Apheori (GM): Eh, what's the worst that could happen?
Bear Soup Guy: I'm back now
Apheori (GM): BSG: Is Greibel a vegetarian?
Gaurav: We have to kill an entire village to escape?
Bear Soup Guy: Ah yes, the question
Frezak (GM): yeah, I just spade dudes to death.
Gaurav: We might want to leave the deer in CAR and have Radek ask the innkeeper first. Who knows, maybe it is taboo but she'd like a bit all the same ...
Greibel: To Rhu: Well, I talk to animals and, like, turn into them
I tried eating meat after that but it was just too weird
Frezak (GM): Gravy will avert his eyes.
Rhu: Greibel: Ah. Okay. Never mind. Forget I asked.
Frezak (GM): And find some interesting dust to look at;
Greibel: (groggily) Forget you asked what?
The Gravedigger: LOOK! DUST!
Rhu pats Greibel on the back as we walk into the inn
Apheori (GM): Some dust blows down the street.
Y'all enter.
Some folks are loitering around the common room again, but not so many as the previous night.
Evening.
Thing.
Frezak (GM): Timeplacewhatsit.
Thingummy.
Gaurav: Afterafternoon
Apheori (GM): A guy raises his mug at ye. The inkeeper raises an eyebrow.
Radek: ~Good evening.~
Frezak (GM): I'll wave at the mug dude.
Rhu looks around for the two villagers from this morning
The innkeeper: Evening to ye. Didn't expect you back so soon, but I suppose that skiff of yours had something to do with that, didn't it?
Or did you make it?
Ganelon: As in build or accomplish?
Apheori (GM): Accomplish.
What's the check to notice things?
Rhu: Perception
Ganelon: Insight for people, otherwise that.
Rhu: You can assume that we are continuously perception-ing at 10+(perception modifier)
Apheori (GM): Why are people special?
Gaurav: Because Perception comes from Wisdom. Insight comes from Charisma, i.e. how well you can read people.
Ganelon: Actually Insight is also wisdom.
Gaurav: oh no, insight is also wisdom
never mind
Ganelon: But it's a different skill.
Apheori (GM): Weird.
Ganelon: Perception is noticing literal details. Sights, sounds, etc.
Apheori (GM): Hey Rhu, you notice you can understand her!
Ganelon: Insight is reading emotions and making sense of those details you already see.
Stuff like that.
Rhu: That's not a "skiff", it's a very fine shi-- hey! I can understand you now!
The innkeeper: Clearly.
Frezak (GM): MAGIC
Gaurav: Gan: see? That sounds charisma-ish to me!
The innkeeper leans forward.
The innkeeper: So you all magically speak this now? This is new.
Frezak (GM): Do we?
Ganelon: Well, intimidate doesn't scale off of strength. Try explaining that.
Frezak (GM): Or is it just the religious dude?
Apheori (GM): Apparently.
Radek: I had no part in this.
Apheori (GM): Nope, you all do.
Frezak (GM): Huh.
Rhu: Hmm. If it is a gift of the great Hazz'ridan, then maybe Greibel won't have it, since he was a flock of seagulls at the time?
Radek: However, we did investigate that hole, even lost the paladin to it.
Rhu takes the old journal out of my bag to see if I can understand that, too.
Apheori (GM): Hazz is smarter than that.
Greibel: ^
Radek: I can say with certainty that it must be closed.
The innkeeper: Lost?
Radek: He's gone. Vanished. No traces.
Rhu: He'll be back. I'm sure of it.
Greibel: (whispers incredulously to Rhu) Weren't these people speaking other gibberish before?
Radek: I even sent a drone in to search for him. You might be interested to know that there is, in fact, another side.
The innkeeper: I'm sorry to hear that.
So four drinks it is.
The Gravedigger: Drinks?
Drinks!
The innkeeper pours some very small mugs of stuff for everyone.
Radek: Just three. I don't require nourishment.
Rhu: (whispers back) You are not going to believe what happened at the rift! Hazz'ridan spoke to us and cleared our minds! He spoke to me in my head! He seemed lost and confused.
The innkeeper: Do tell.
Oh, love, it's not about requirements. Just try it.
You won't regret a thing.
The Gravedigger: Hey, do you want these meat bits?
Rhu uses his body language to show disappointment at the tinyness of the mugs, but helps himself anyway.
Greibel: (whispers back) Hazz'ridan, the God of dead ends, lost and confused. Who woulda thought?
Apheori (GM): One of the other guys at the bar says, quietly, "You'll just regret several other things."
Radek: Liquids have not passed my lips in decades, ma'am.
The innkeeper: Your loss.
Radek: And recently I seem to have even transcended a need for oxygen.
The innkeeper drinks Radek's for him.
The innkeeper: Me eyes Gravy's meat.
Ganelon: Yeah, he's kind of a big chrome spoilsport.
The innkeeper: How much have you got?
Rhu: (whispers back) Every ending is another beginning. Hazz'ridan is at our side. We have a new goal now: to close the rift on this world. We cannot fail!
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You realise you're drunk.
The Gravedigger: Most of the animal.
Minus what we had for lunch.
Rhu: I'm not drunk, I am perspfectly sober.
The innkeeper brinks.
The innkeeper: Well, you've been busy.
Sure, I'll take it. How much you asking?
Rhu: I know exactly what I'm sayin' and to whom I am sayin' and to what I ... how much for another one, these are delicious.
The innkeeper pours Rhu another.
The Gravedigger shrugs.
The innkeeper: Today's on the house.
Greibel: (to the others since Rhu is in a less whispery mood now) So how do we close this "rift" thing?
Rhu: Good lady, you are t-- ... you are t--- ...
The Gravedigger: Whatever you want, it wasn't any trouble.
The innkeeper: I'll give you ten.
And do drink up.
The Gravedigger: Sure.
Frezak (GM): I'll examine the drink.
Rhu is now examining the bartop with great interest
Apheori (GM): The drink is brown, almost reddish. It's very small, but you can't actually see the bottom of the mug.
The Gravedigger: So what IS this?
Ganelon: Just to be polite, I'll actually take some of this drink in a syringe.
Because injecting alcohol straight into your bloodstream is how the pros do it, kids. Don't try this at home.
The innkeeper pours Rhu another, almost grinning.
The innkeeper: Shalott! The proper stuff, rather.
Frezak (GM): i'm mostly watching Rhu get hammered.
The innkeeper: Not like went bad and made your friend's... friend.
Frezak (GM): I'll drink my cup of stuff.
The innkeeper eyes the porridge, which climbed back onto Greibel's shoulder.
Rhu: HUH? HUH? I HEARD mnamesomesbdit.
The innkeeper pours another, mixing in from a different jug.
Frezak (GM): And hope my being a seven foot slab of meat prevents me from going runny like the skinny avenger there.
Gaurav: Oh, is Rasputin the Porridge still with us? Awesome.
Apheori (GM): Yeah, it doesn't hit you like it hit him.
It's more just... kind of nice and fuzzy.
So how does this syringe thing work?
Gaurav: Rhu's had a big day. Good for him.
Ganelon: Like any medical syringe.
Frezak (GM): INjecting booze right into your blood?
YOU MADMAN.
You're gonna DIE.
Apheori (GM): So you want the lady to put booze in a syringe?
Ganelon: If the lady wants me to enjoy it, yes
Frezak (GM): Im' not joking by the way.
The innkeeper takes the syringe skeptically.
The innkeeper eyes it.
Ganelon: Because it bypasses my liver, I assume?
The innkeeper eyes Radek.
Ganelon: That probably isn't functioning any longer.
Radek: ...What? It's efficient.
Frezak (GM): yep.
Gaurav: Yeah, alcohol + no liver --> bad idea
The innkeeper: If this kills you, I take no responsibility.
Unfortunately you've gone and got my interest, and the whole floor's watching...
The Gravedigger: Me lays a hand on Radek.
If you die.
I'll bury you.
Rhu starts mumbling a dirty song
The innkeeper mixes a very small amount of dark stuff with some other stuff and waters it down a bit and adds some other stuff and pours a bit into the syringe...
The innkeeper: I can't think of anything dramatic to say.
The innkeeper hands it over.
Radek: Fear not.
Apheori (GM): Several of the villagers boo.
Radek: With this, I prove my own immortality.
Ganelon: He is not immortal.
Apheori (GM): Snrk.
Some of the villagers are now cheering him on.
Wen: two deaths in one day might not be the best thing >_>
Apheori (GM): Urging him to do it.
Do it!
Wen: Ah, but your guy ain't dead!
Radek injects the mixture into his arm.
Apheori (GM): ...probably.
There's a long silence.
Wen takes on the role of the one guy muttering and shaking his head in the crowd
Apheori (GM): Radek neglects to fall over dead.
Radek: Keh heh heh.
Apheori (GM): He does get a bit dizzy and weird feeling, though.
Radek: Told you sooo--whoah.
The Gravedigger cheers and pats Radek on the back.
Apheori (GM): Everyone starts clapping and cheering.
Radek: I had forgotten what this feels like.
Greibel: Huh....weird.
Rhu bangs the table a few times
The innkeeper pushes Greibel another.
Greibel looks at it for a moment
Greibel start sipping it slowly
Ganelon: Aw yeah, getting the smart guy drunk.
Apheori (GM): Gravy: You standing or sitting?
Frezak (GM): Male bonding coming right up.
I'm... standing behind Radek right now.
Apheori (GM): Well, standing behind you is that large guy from before.
Both of your heads are kind of grazing the ceiling.
He's very close, and you realise someone is there...
Frezak (GM): I'll turn around and give him a look.
Of the "what?" variety.
Wen: uhh, is it just me or did Gan and Gaurav disappear?
Gaurav: Nope, still here.
Wen: o_O okay.
Ganelon: Don't trust the names.
Frezak (GM): The are deceit.
*the names are deceit
Wen: well, carry on.
Wen watches with interest
Ganelon: I want to know what's up with this guy guy.
Big guy, rather.
Apheori (GM): Right, sorry.
The guy says, "Hi."
Ganelon: And also wrap things up because the hunger only intensifies.
Apheori (GM): My toe was bleeding all over the place.
Wen: ><
The Gravedigger: "Hello? Something you need?"
Ganelon: And I'm going to be prying off noodles that have been frozen together for at least 10 minutes.
Also yeesh, hope you're okay.
Apheori (GM): The guy says nothing.
Frezak (GM): I'm just gonna stare blankly for a bit.
Apheori (GM): He stares blankly as well.
The Gravedigger: "Oookayyy. Good luck with that."
Frezak (GM): And turn back round and see how Radek is coping.
Ganelon: Happily muttering obscure formulae to nobody in particular.
Apheori (GM): The innkeeper looks really proud of herself for that.
Frezak (GM): I take it that I cannot brofist the innkeep.
Rhu notices the muttered formulae, tries to figure out how the song goes, fails. Returns to persuing the bartop.
Ganelon: Song?
No, these are formulas of SCIENCE!
Frezak (GM): He doesn't know that :p
Ganelon: They describe the laws of the universe!
And also how to break them!
It is the fundamental theory of magic!
Maybe!
Apheori (GM): So Rhu and Radek are drunk. Eeeeexcellent.
Greibel and Gravy ain't entirely so.
Rhu: NOT DRUNK VOLTING
Frezak (GM): Gravy will not get more than buzzed.
Apheori (GM): The innkeeper wants you to drink more.
Frezak (GM): Someone has to keep watch over these madmen.
Because they're men.
And maaaad
Apheori (GM): They ain't even doing anything. Terribly boring drunks, they are.
Frezak (GM): THey're mumbling and muttering and stuff.
I don't think they have Drunk Proficiency.
I'll get busy telling Greibel everything that happened.
With undrunk details.
Apheori (GM): The guy is still standing behind you.
Ganelon: Just wait.
Once Radek decides it's time to get to work, you won't think he's a boring drunk any longer.
Just a dangerous madmen who should never be allowed near his own tools.
Madman, rather.
Apheori (GM): He isn't normally?
Ganelon: Hey!
Bear Soup Guy: People keep calling me on the phone and talking to me and asking stuff about things
Ganelon: I haven't USED these bombs I made. Yet.
Bear Soup Guy: I think Greibel's going to turn in early with a nice buzz
Apheori (GM): Silly people.
Rhu has fallen asleep on the bar top.
Frezak (GM): I'll pick Rhu up.
And give the Innkeep a coin.
If I haven't already.
Apheori (GM): You sorted out the money with the deer thing, I think.
Did you ever drag that in?
Frezak (GM): I thought I came in with it.
Gaurav: I think so, yes.
Apheori (GM): Right, so that's all sorted. You have more money, some of you are drunk, and the beds await if you need them.
Frezak (GM): I tihnk we do.
Apheori (GM): But the guy is still standing right behind you.
Frezak (GM): I'm gonna ignore him because he is creepy and I don't feel like burying anyone tonight.
Apheori (GM): So you just sort of bounce off him.
And push past?
Gaurav: Bouncy giants.
Frezak (GM): Bounce off him?
Apheori (GM): Unlike you, he's a little blubbery.
Ganelon: I'll follow these guys up, but as usual, I've no intentions of sleeping.
Frezak (GM): But why do I have to bounce off him?
Ganelon: I have a new eyebot to construct!
Frezak (GM): I can just walk around him, no?
Bear Soup Guy: EYEBOT
Apheori (GM): Frezak: Because he was entirely too close, and massive.
Frezak (GM): I'm just gonna move around him.
Apheori (GM): You do walk around him, but... he's really close.
Yeah.
Frezak (GM): Well he's gonna get whacked by the Rhu over my shoulders if he doesn't move.
Apheori (GM): He doesn't move, and gets whacked.
He still doesn't move.
He looks... confused.
Frezak (GM): Not my problem.
I have an Avenger to settle.
Rhu wakes up
Rhu: Huh? Wha? Wh?
The Gravedigger: You're going to bed, little man.
Ganelon: http://img261.imageshack.us/img261/7744/68rocket16.jpg
This is the eyebot.
Rhu: Hmf. No. Not sleepy. Five more mintnes.
The Gravedigger: Shhhhh.
Frezak (GM): And I'm gonna go dump him on a bed.
Rhu mumbles, puts my thumb in my mouth and goes back to sleep
Gaurav: That is one awesome eyebot!
Frezak (GM): I'll have him bunk with Radek.
Actually.
he can go with Greibel.
i'll go with RAdek since he doesn't sleep.
Ganelon: He's a diligent guard.
Except for the part where he pays no attention.
Frezak (GM): Radek?
I picture him being in his own little world of science.
Yeah, that.
So I'll leave him with Greibel.
And then check my gear and go to sleep.
Rhu snuggles into bed and falls asleep
Ganelon: I do believe that will be all, unless something eventful occurs during the night.
Apheori (GM): Naw.
Shall we call it a week and meet in two? >.<
Ganelon: I suppose so.
Gaurav: Sounds good! I'm also okay for meeting in between either week.
Ganelon: And I suppose I'll deal with the level-upping of people's sheets?
Gaurav: Tuesday 11am MT to 3pm MT works particularly well, since it's squeezed between two classes for me.
Frezak (GM): That was for reals?
Ganelon: Or at least those which are already on my builder.
I dunno, was it?
Gaurav: I'll level my own character up -- the format is ridiculously annoying, so I wouldn't want you to spend too much time trying to make sense of it!
Apheori (GM): Yeah, you all need to level up.
You survived Sarathi. You made... actual progress since...
AND THERE WILL EVENTUALLY BE COMBAT, REALLY.
Can we all do tuesday?
Ganelon: I don't know if everyone's still here.
Frezak (GM): Um.
Sure?
Gaurav: Yes!
Ganelon: I should be able to.
Gaurav: BSG?
Frezak (GM): Well now we can spend days discussing level options with Gan >.>
BSG isn't here.
He left.
Gaurav: Anyhow, I'm just pleased that for once the game didn't have to end because of me, and now I'm off to feed. Thanks for a great game everybody! See you Tuesday or next week!
Frezak (GM): FEED
You sound like a wampire.
Gaurav: A TRUE vampire would spell vampire with a "w" ^_^
Frezak (GM): True wampires sound boring.
Apheori (GM): FEED.
Gaurav: Indeed. Good night all!

Session 7

Gaurav: Is this Thingy?
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Bear Soup Guy: Noodles!
Apheori (GM): I'll be right back. I need to try hammering my foot.
Bear Soup Guy: Fair enough
Gaurav: ... wha?
Apheori (GM): Okay, I'm here.
Frezak (GM): So you say.
Is Wen coming?
Ganelon: Well, his character's dead.
I think he's just a watcher.
Gaurav: He's just resting.
His character, not Wen.
Frezak (GM): He's just resting his eyes.
And his blood.
Apheori (GM): Yes.
That.
Totally.
Bear Soup Guy: REST IN BLOOD
\m/
Apheori (GM): Yes/
The Gravedigger: REST IN HOLE.
Apheori (GM): So where were we? Everyone but Radek sleeping?
Rhu tosses in his sleep. He mumbles something about cornflakes.
Gaurav: We were also leveling/leveled up to level 2, I think.
Apheori (GM): And you all have been blessed by the Holy Hazz'ridan... with sanity.
Apheori (GM) points and laughs.
Apheori (GM): Right, does everyone know how to level?
DID YOU DO IT?
Frezak (GM): I did my levellings.
Bear Soup Guy: Oh dear, levels....
Apheori (GM): Do we care?
Frezak (GM): I'm levelled.
To the max.
of 2.
Apheori (GM): Are we doomed?
Gaurav: We were doomed a long time ago on a planet far, far away.
Apheori (GM): Can I assault you with mutants?
Bear Soup Guy: I have no idea how to level
Gaurav: Rhu is at level 2 and ready to go.
Bear Soup Guy: Please assault us with mutants though
Frezak (GM): Does Gan have Greibel's sheet?
Ganelon: I do.
Frezak (GM): Then throw some stuff on it and we can rock this city.
Willage.
Ganelon: Dude, I dunno how to build druids.
Frezak (GM): Just throw some random omnifunctional stuff and we can rework it properly later.
Gaurav: Skittering Sneak or Obscuring Mist might be useful as level 2 druid utilities go.
Ganelon: I dunno, Verdant Bounty sounds fun.
You can just point and BOOM PLANTS.
Gaurav: Feat: what about Ferocious Tiger Form?
Ganelon: It'll do for now.
Bear Soup Guy: BOOM PLANTS and tigers
Sounds excellent
Frezak (GM): brb
Gaurav: Tiger. Just the one. The one you turn into, that is.
Bear Soup Guy: Well
They add up to tigers after I do it over and over
They're just...tigers over time
Time-gers
Ganelon: Okay, done.
Apheori (GM): Sounds like something DJ Jesus would say.
Excellent.
Gaurav: DJ Jesus?
Bear Soup Guy: From Lucy?
Apheori (GM): Yes!
Ganelon: So he can make a burst 2 within 10 zone of overgrowth spring up from nowhere now.
Apheori (GM): Gaurav: Lucy, Daughter of the Devil.
Ganelon: That's 25 ft of plants.
Square feet.
Bear Soup Guy: That show was awesome
While it lasted, anyway
Apheori (GM): Yes.
And blimey.
Ganelon: The plants are very thick and suitable to hide in.
Bear Soup Guy: Oh my god awesome
I AM PLANT MAN
The dumbest of all Mega Man villans
Gaurav: It doesn't specify what kind of plant, does it?
Ganelon: Nope.
So obviously it's a narcotic.
Gaurav: Unless there are carnivorous plants in this universe ...
Apheori (GM): With Greibel involved, it surely is.
Of course there are.
Bear Soup Guy: Sprawling stalks of cannabis
Frezak (GM): You become a field of hemp?
Bear Soup Guy: :D
Frezak (GM): And then.. smoke yourself.
MAAAAAN.
Bear Soup Guy: There was some supervillain who grafted his head to just like, a ton of pot, in some comic
That is the end of that story
Gaurav imagines a tearful scene in which the only way we can Solve The Problem With The Holes is by altering our perception so that we can see our foes ... and Greibel must sacrifice himself so that we might toke.
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Gaurav: A *ton*? Dude was taking no chances.
Frezak (GM): THumbs up for that plan.
Gravy needs a lot of drugs for his body mass.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Game?
Frezak (GM): Sure.
WE MISS YOU WEN.
Gaurav: Game!
Apheori (GM): Yes.
So everyone went to bed after lots of drinking. Shalott for the lost. Bit of a tradition. A welcome to your new grave.
IT'S HAPPENING.
Gaurav: He'll be back. You can't keep a good paladin down. Or trapped in alternate cheesy reality, as the case might be.
Apheori (GM): And Radek was probably doing stuff while drunk.
Ganelon: Yes.
I can get to that in the morning.
Apheori (GM): Well, it's morning.
Frezak (GM): MORNING
HELLO BIRDS
GIANT MUTANT BIRDS.
Gaurav: Is that OOC? Because Rhu might be ever so slightly hungover.
Bear Soup Guy: The way a delivery truck is ever so slightly heavy
Apheori (GM): Lessee...
Bear Soup Guy: Are we rolling hangover checks? :D
Apheori (GM): Dude, that would be hilarious.
But I don't know enough about hangovers.
Bear Soup Guy: Fair enough
(From Gaurav): if Hazz'ridan or any other god would like to possess passed-out Rhu to pass on a mysterious message to the group, now would be a good time!
Gaurav: hey, quick question: do I get to add a +1 to all my checks now that I'm at level 2 -- i.e. my CHA is 8, so mod is -1, does that become 0?
hungoverness sounds like a fortitude defense or some such to me
Frezak (GM): yep
All your D20s have +1 now.
It doesn't change your stat mod.
Just the rolls.
So your cha mod is still -1, but a Cha Check is +0.
Gaurav: ah, gotcha. I always get confused about that. Thanks!
Bear Soup Guy: MODS
Frezak (GM): NOW LET'S GO DO HERO THINGS
(To Gaurav): Hazz will bide his time and appear in full glory later. IT WILL BE AWESOME.
Bear Soup Guy: HERO TIME
(To Gaurav): TENTACLES EVERYWHERE.
Greibel stumbles groggily out of bed
Greibel: hero time......
Apheori (GM): Ahah, heroes.
Radek: Oh, you're awake.
(From Gaurav): *gasp*
Apheori (GM): Does this mean you get a +1 to sanity checks too?
Frezak (GM): That's up to you.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Gaurav: Depends on whether you think the sanity check is related to something about us (like our constitution, intelligence, etc -- you could even do it backwards, high intelligence = more likely to get confused by magic!). If so, then yes? Otherwise, straight d20s mean everybody has an equal chance of going batty I think.
Rhu wakes as slowly as he can possibly manage. If he were familiar with steam locomotives or bricks, he would say he feels like a hundred steam locomotives are driving full-tilt into a brick wall in his head, but luckily he isn't and can't.
Apheori (GM): Well, you all have base modifiers that change depending on circumstances and stuff and I'm not telling you what they are.
Gaurav: oof. makes sense.
Greibel stares incredulously at Radek while taking a bong hit
Apheori (GM): Is Gravy still asleep?
Frezak (GM): How would I know ?
Amadi: That'll make you live, you know.
Frezak (GM): I'd assumed it'd wake up with everyone else?
Apheori (GM): Frezak: Fine, wake him up.
Bloody giants.
Frezak (GM): Okay, he wakes up.
Apheori (GM): And Amadi just randomly appeared behind Greibel.
Greibel: Hmmm
Oh hey, it's the time lady
Amadi: What? Where?
Amadi looks around.
Greibel points playfully at Amadi
Amadi: Do you see that?
Greibel: You, silly!
Rhu: Time wha?
Greibel offers Amadi the bong
Rhu sits bolt upright when he sees Amadi, electrical pain coursing through this skull.
Ganelon: ...How old does Amadi appear to be, again?
Amadi reaches out to take it and vanishes.
Apheori (GM): When touching it.
Rhu: Ow. Hi. Sandwich Lady, right?
Ow.
Apheori (GM): She's... grown-looking.
But small.
Greibel turns bemused to Radek
Rhu: Where did she go?
Greibel: She's been smoking some good stuff man.
Radek: I'm almost surprised that you haven't had enough of people disappearing in front of us.
...Almost.
Frezak (GM): Wait, we see this?
I thought it was in Greibel/Rhu's room.
Apheori (GM): I think only Greibel and Radek should.
Ganelon: I was in his room.
Not Rhu.
Apheori (GM): Right, that.
Or was Rhu there too?
Frezak (GM): Oh,r ight.
I thought I was with Radek because he didn't need the bed.
Apheori (GM): Or that.
Er.
Yeah, that's what happened.
Oh, whatever.
Greibel: The first night Greibel was with Radek
Rhu: According to the logs, Rhu was dumped with Greibel, and Gravy was with Radek since he doesn't sleep.
Greibel: But who knows what we did the second night
errrrrr
OOC
Ganelon: Oh. Well then, whoops.
Bear Soup Guy: We were drunk
Gaurav: People waking up in the middle of the night searching for water and ending up in the wrong room is not out of the question.
Especially given the Shallot.
Bear Soup Guy: Good point
Frezak (GM): You'd know if I was getting into the same bed as you.
Gaurav: Yes.
Apheori (GM): Are you sure?
If gravy winds up on top of someone, would they necessarily survive?
Frezak (GM): Sure.
Ganelon: He hogs sheets, though.
Frezak (GM): I DO NOT
Ganelon: He totally does.
Gaurav: Their dying screams would rouse Gravy and he would get up before they lost consciousness. Hopefully.
Frezak (GM): Well Gravy will head downstairs for breakfast.
Apheori (GM): Gravy will find more bowls of (less) congealed porridge.
Frezak (GM): Awesome.
Ganelon: I'll follow him.
Rhu does the morning stuff and heads downstairs also, maintaining a look of death.
Frezak (GM): I'll wave at Rhu.
Amadi walks out of a wall and follows Rhu down.
Frezak (GM): I feel that a look of death is normal for him.
Rhu doesn't see it. He heads for the table and begins to porridge.
Greibel heads downstairs, realizing he's now lacking a bong
Frezak (GM): Do I see the midget phase through the wall?
Apheori (GM): Yes.
It happens around when you wave.
The Gravedigger: Oh, hello small lady.
Amadi waves back.
Amadi: Hi!
Are you the mystery?
The Gravedigger: Doubt it.
Apheori (GM): RAHB: Greibel still has the bong. Unless he dropped it. Which is entirely possible.
Radek: His mind's no grand puzzle, that's for sure.
The answer is shovels.
Bear Soup Guy: Oh okay
The Gravedigger: Shovels solve many things.
Also spades.
Amadi: (to Radek) And you? You don't look anything like a shovel.
Unless you do.
The Gravedigger: No.
He isn't a shovel.
Amadi: Shovels take many forms.
The Gravedigger: I have seen many shovels.
Amadi: Like spiders.
The Gravedigger: And I can say with certainty that Radek is not a shovel.
Or a trowel.
Amadi sits down and starts eating a porridge.
Greibel: He's more like the Silver Surfer
The Gravedigger: The what?
Are you on drugs again?
Still?
Nevermind.
Greibel smiles
Frezak (GM): Isn't Greibel always smiling?
Amadi eyes Greibel.
Frezak (GM): Unless he hasn't got lips.
Amadi: Not hardly. Silver Surfer's silver, for one.
Bear Soup Guy: He smiled more
Greibel: Fair enough
Radek inspects his new eyebot curiously.
The Gravedigger: So what are our plans for today?
Rhu: Why do you keep vanishing and reappearing, Sandwich Lady? It hurts my head.
The Gravedigger: MAGIC.
Radek: I don't remember as much about how I made this as I'd like.
The Gravedigger: Can't you... take it apart to see how you did it?
Greibel: Does it shoot lasers?
Radek: Of course it shoots lasers, and of course I could take it apart.
Amadi: Oh, Kerrin, I'm not your head.
Amadi pats Rhu's head.
The Gravedigger: hey!
The eyebot is the mystery!
It's the robot floating eye that fires lasers.
That's the mystery.
Greibel: Sounds like a mystery
The Gravedigger: I solved the mystery about what the mystery is!
Is there a prize?
Radek sighs heavily.
Apheori (GM): That's not a mystery.
Ganelon: He's a bit hungover.
The Gravedigger pats Radek.
The Gravedigger: You can solve the next one.
Rhu: (to Amadi) I don't think we've been introduced. I am Rhu, an Avenger in the service of Hazz'ridan the creators of dead ends.
Apheori (GM): That's... alcohol.
Amadi: Creator? Dead ends aren't created.
Ganelon: "What the hell did I do last night?" is a pretty good mystery.
Amadi: This ham tastes like soap.
Is there soap in the ham?
Ganelon: But it's not been completely solved yet.
The Gravedigger: What ham?
Greibel: That's porridge, silly lady
Rhu: Dead ends come from Hazz'ridan and in the end return to him. I read that on the internet.
The Gravedigger: That's porridge.
Amadi: Looks like ham to me.
The Gravedigger: You got your religion from the Internet?
Online Avenger degree? Cool.
Rhu: The Maze of Hazz'ridan where I was given my implement and training didn't talk about the beginnings of ends. I had to figure that out for myself.
Amadi: Wear it.
Wear it like you mean it.
It's not a maze unless you WEAR IT!
Amadi suddenly stands on her and towers over Rhu.
The Gravedigger: You sound even crazier than Rhu.
He says a lot of rubbish.
Rhu: WOAH! Do you mean this? (points to the Maze of Hazz'ridan implement on a string around his neck)
The Gravedigger: No offense, Rhu.
Gaurav: Stands on her what?
Ganelon: I assume feet.
Amadi sits gracefully.
Amadi: No.
Apheori (GM): Yes, feet.
Rhu: None taken, Gravy. Hazz'ridan the Great showed us great mercy yesterday, and he is with us in our quest. I shall have a chance to learn many, many truths at his feet before I return home, of this I am certain. Where's the salt?
The Gravedigger: Check behind the bar.
Amadi: Try the gravy.
Amadi leans forward and grabs Rhu's implement.
Rhu stays where he is, in case Amadi vanishes again.
Rhu: Hey!
Rhu tries to grab it back
Rhu: I need that!
Greibel: Two enter. Only ONE shall leave!
Amadi: No you don't. Your faith is your own. Your items are mine.
Always mine.
Forever mine.
You enter my dreams and you are mine, and aren't you here now? Yes, yes, I think you are.
So you're mine.
Mine, mine, mine.
Rhu lets go of his implement.
Rhu: (awestruck) who _are_ you?
Amadi stares at it and turns it over in her hands.
The Gravedigger: Yeah, that's crazy and creepy.
Greibel: I'm with you, brother
Greibel casually eats the porridge anyway
Greibel tries feeding some to Rasputin
The Gravedigger: Isn't that cannibalism?
The porridge declines.
Greibel: Hmmph
Worth a shot
What does porridge eat, anyway?
Gaurav: That is well-brought-up porridge.
Radek: Fanged peas.
The porridge jiggles a bit in an attempt to answer.
Greibel: Oh, right!
The Gravedigger: Booze?
Greibel gives Rasputin a suspiciously still in-tact fanged pea
Apheori (GM): Rasputin tries to grab the pea, but it manages to evade and goes onto the floor.
So Rasputin follows, leaping after it, and grabs it on the way down before hitting the floor with a splat.
Greibel: Good boy!
Amadi: That looks painful.
The Gravedigger: Ew.
Rhu: (to Amadi) what did you mean by all that "My items are yours" stuff?
The Gravedigger: You're not a thief, are you?
Because Rhu kind of needs his stuff.
Amadi leans toward Rhu. "Oh, Kerrin, you're here. You need to ask?"
Amadi: Thief?
THIEF?!
Why, yes, actually, I am.
But not of things.
Never of things.
Things are cheap. Things die. Fade. Change.
Amadi: Disappear.
Not things.
Amadi holds up the implement.
Amadi: This is wrong.
I've never seen it like this before.
Rhu: Who is Kerrin? And what is your name?
Amadi: You're Kerrin, of course!
And I'm... oh, I dunno.
Dira?
The Gravedigger: Rhu is Kerrin? LIke... a play?
Amadi: No, that's not right. She was Dira.
The Gravedigger: People acting parts?
Rhu: I'm Rhu.
Amadi: I'm someone else.
Radek: What *do* you know?
Specifically, about the rift?
Amadi: Besides the atomic weight of tofu?
What rift?
Was there a rift?
Not Riften, I hope.
Or do you men The Rift?
Isn't that a county near Wyzima?
Amadi: Saleus Neloth.
Rhu: I'm not Kerrin. Who is Kerrin? Why did you call me that?
Amadi doesn't answer and just stares off into space, fiddling with the implement.
Radek: Nothing, then. Another victim of its influence, most likely.
Rhu: (to others) What's going on here? I'm Rhu.
Radek begins to tinker with his new eyebot.
Radek: Yes, you are.
The Gravedigger: Well, the little lady is crazy.
The porridge on the floor slowly draws itself back together and then squelch-bounces its way back to Greibel's shoulder.
Frezak (GM): Brb
Apheori (GM): Hee.
Greibel pets it
The porridge purrs.
Gaurav: You have the best porridge.
Bear Soup Guy: I sure do
Apheori (GM): >.>
Gaurav: Is anybody else around in the pub in the morning? Any villagers, the barkeep?
Apheori (GM): Barkeep is probably asleep. Everyone else has sodded off as well. Apparently this is just... normal?
Gaurav: This is as it was yesterday, yes. I hope those wacky villagers from the first morning swing by the bar at some point. They were fun.
Bear Soup Guy: I wonder if the big guy knows anything we should know
Ganelon: He is a mystery.
Bear Soup Guy: A conspicuous mystery
Apheori (GM): So...
Someone do something.
Greibel stands up abruptly and screams for a few seconds
Greibel sits back down and acts as if it didn't happen
Apheori (GM): Snrk.
Ganelon: I've just been waiting for Frezak.
Apheori (GM): I know. >.<
We all are. He's just slow and I'm impatient.
Amadi taps her nose and points at Greibel, then likewise acts as though nothing had happened.
Rhu: (to Amadi) So ... you're not Dira?
Amadi: Who's Dira?
Rhu: You just said you weren't Dira. "She was Dira", you said.
Amadi: Who was?
Rhu: You weren't clear on that point.
It sounds like you're not entirely sure what your name is. I -- It feels rude to refer to you as Sandwich Lady all the time. Do you not have any other name I could use?
Frezak (GM): back
Amadi: Of course I have other names. Don't be ridiculous.
Who goes around with only one name? Even waking, it'd be crazy!
Rhu: What may we call you, then?
Amadi: Call me Teatime.
Or Dave.
Or Amadi.
Or whatever!
Greibel: Hi Dave!
Amadi: Hi!
Greibel waves
The Gravedigger: Sure, Crazy lady.
Amadi waves.
Rhu: Teatime? Like ... a time for a drink with jam and bread?
Amadi: Not at all.
Like the time between liver and spleen. The time between notes when you wonder if you are alive or dead, dreaming or waking.
Rhu: Right. Miss ... Missus? ... Teatime, then.
Amadi: The time between the light, when you do not know whether this is daydream or nightmare, waking or dreaming.
Rhu: Would you like to come with us and see a rift?
Amadi: Is it pretty?
Radek: No, it's quite horrible.
Rhu: It's got a dead tree on it.
Amadi: Is it HER dead tree?
The Gravedigger: And some water.
Amadi: The dead tree behind the statue, perhaps?
Rhu: But that tree has a light tree growing on it, which we were hoping Greibel could have a poke at, since it might be druid magic.
The water's quite pretty, actually.
Radek: I have some of it.
Ganelon: I would ask if he learned anything about it, but he was drunk
Amadi: So if he did learn anything about it, it's up in the air if he actually remembers correctly? XD
Gaurav: I imagine Radek's quite a productive drunk.
Ganelon: Yes to both.
Rhu takes a step back from Amadi when she does here "XD" face
Ganelon: He not only built an eyebot but modified his rifle to use a straight-pull bolt for faster reloading.
Amadi: OOC
Sorry.
Ganelon: (This is to explain a feat I took)
Apheori (GM): THAT WAS NOT AMADI.
Bear Soup Guy: Was it Dave?
Apheori (GM): That was me. Mistyping. Dave is... something else altogether.
Rhu: We should head out to the rift. Who knows when Mrs. Teatime will vanish again, and she might know something about it that eludes us.
The Gravedigger: If she does, how would we know?
Radek: Asking her seems out of the question.
Ganelon: See what I did there, guys?
Amadi: The question is the question.
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Amadi: Ask, or you will never know.
The Gravedigger: yeah, that.
I don't think she's gonna be any use.
Greibel: Dave, will I ever find true love?
The Gravedigger: Just spouting endless Zens at us.
Amadi: Porridge knows, but nobody ever asks...
Amadi stops and looks at Greibel.
Rhu: She's the only thing on this planet that appears and disappears mysteriously on this planet, if you don't count the falling anvils.
Amadi: No.
I'm sorry, but no.
Greibel sulks
Rhu: She's a link to the weirdness of Sarathi. Possibly. Unless she's just weird of her own accord, which seems ... likely.
Amadi: It's for the best, really. The lovers hurt more than the rest.
The Gravedigger: But we can't get anything useful out of her.
Greibel: Are the lovers armed?
Rhu: Hang on. (to Amadi) What do you mean, Porridge knows? And it's not "Porridge", it's "Rasputin". It has a name.
Amadi: They can be armed.
Rhu: The rift might interact with her in interesting ways. Or vice versa. Anywho, we have a seat spare.
Amadi: The Gravedigger won't be.
The Gravedigger: What?
Amadi: With your love. He wanted love.
Amadi points at Greibel.
Amadi: Blame him.
Asking answers. He should be asking questions!
The Gravedigger: Nooo, I think i'll blame the crazy person that never makes sense.
Greibel: Hummm...
Amadi: Which one?
Sense can be made out of anything.
You just need a knife.
The Gravedigger: So, Radek.
What are we doing today?
Amadi: Or a shovel.
Gaurav: Good question.
The Gravedigger: Other than spectating.
Radek: We need to gather information.
Greibel whispers to Amadi "He's really a nice guy when you get to know him."
Rhu: We could poke around the village and look for someone who knows more about the trees and the rift and the pool. We thought yesterday that druid magic might be involved; someone might know the druid what done it.
Radek: If you think Greibel can be of use, it's only a short drive to the tree.
Greibel: (continuing) But Radek isn't. He really is that bad.
Amadi: (To Greibel) And will you say that about me someday too?
Radek: Nobody asked for your opinion, Greibel.
The Gravedigger: Might as well poke about here while we can, then.
Rhu: We could head back to the Rift and poke around a bit there. Or we could follow the dry river bank, where the DM assured us we were close to making an Important Discovery (I think?)
The Gravedigger: Though these willagers don't seem to be very useful.
Amadi: Willagers!
Greibel: (To Amadi) That depends. Do you like lava lamps?
Rhu: If we do that, we should pack some lunch, because this porridge is very inadequate (sorry for insulting the relatives, Rasputin)
Amadi counts off on her fingers.
Amadi: Six lava lamps, four screens, two potted trees, and a big old yucca.
Rhu: Well, we can talk to them now. And they're probably all superimpressed by Radek after his intravenous drinking last night.
Amadi: That wasn't me.
The Gravedigger: I'm not sure they understand the perils of intravenous drinking.
They probably don't understand what livers do.
The innkeeper walks in and sees the group.
The innkeeper: Oh, good morning.
The Gravedigger: Hello Miss Inkeep.
Rhu: They seemed impressed, especially the inn-- oh, hello!
Radek: You would think my technical skills would be more impressive, but no. All it takes to make this lot cheer is the capacity to endure alcohol.
The Gravedigger waves
Radek: Hmph.
The innkeeper waves vaguely and heads into another room.
Rhu: Wait! Do you know any druids around here?
The innkeeper looks back.
The innkeeper: Druids?
If you mean the Guardians, we've only Ekka.
Bear Soup Guy: I thought the inkeep didn't speak our language >_<
The innkeeper: She lives down the way if you need a consult.
The innkeeper ducks out of the common room.
Apheori (GM): Hazz'ridan blessed you with sanity.
This included language stuff, apparently.
Frezak (GM): GM, do we know what 'down the way' means or do we have to bother her for details?
Gaurav: You'd have to be inSANE not to understand these people!
Apheori (GM): Let's just say you know.
Frezak (GM): Hokay.
Well, that sounds like a plan.
Apheori (GM): Well, yes, Hazz'ridan's version of sanity may not be QUITE what other people have in mind...
Rhu: Agreed. To Ekka's! (to Amadi) Are you coming?
Amadi: Are you going?
Rhu: I am.
Amadi: Well, go on then.
Rhu nods
Rhu: We'll see you later.
Gaurav: Shall we?
Radek: Much later, I should hope.
Frezak (GM): TO EKKA
Greibel: Have fun, Dave!
Greibel waves
Amadi follows, still fiddling with Rhu's implement, holding it up to the light, turning it over, trying to figure it out. "This is wrong," she mutters. "It shouldn't be this."
Rhu leaves the bar and starts walking in the direction indicated/suggested by the innkeep, whose name we also need to figure out at some point.
Frezak (GM): Yarr.
I do a similar thing.
Ganelon: No arguments here.
Greibel: Off to the Guardian's place!
Apheori (GM): So I guess y'll head outside, see some folks working on a wagon, see those two guys from before laughing the others on, see the house...
Gaurav: The Guardian's house?
Apheori (GM): Right.
Greibel: http://gyazo.com/d92f703dd50cdb0cdcbeeb4e8437c92c.png
Rhu knocks on the door.
Bear Soup Guy: err, obviously Greibel didn't link a screenshot >_<
Greibel sings "You keep-a knockin' but you caaaaan't come in!"
Ganelon: Is his singing correct?
Can we not come in?
Bear Soup Guy: Little Richard is always correct
But seeing as this is a different universe...
Apheori (GM): The door is shut. Do you go in?
Is that a thing here?
Do you knock? There's not beeper...
no
Gaurav: I am sure there is a Little Richard in this universe also.
Somewhere.
Rhu knocks again.
Apheori (GM): A what?
Bear Soup Guy: Somewhere
Bear Soup Guy gestures at the night sky
Apheori (GM): Oh, ghah, missed the first knock, sorry.
Well, nothing happens from knocking.
Frezak (GM): I CHARGE THE DO- knock again.
Rhu: ... something tells me that before we just walk into a house belonging to somebody called a Guardian, it might be wise to check for booby traps
Greibel: Hey now
Apheori (GM): Amadi pushes past, taps the implement to the door, and then opens it and goes in.
Greibel: I'm a Guardian and I've never trapped anyone's boobies
Frezak (GM): I will activate my 18 Con lungs.
The Gravedigger: HEEELOOOOOO? GUARDIAN PERSON?
Apheori (GM): There's a clunk from somewhere inside.
Then a startled yell.
Frezak (GM): What kind of clunk?
Apheori (GM): Like someone falling on the floor.
Then you hear Amadi.
Since she already charged in.
"Hello, Guardian person, good morning, good day, good morrow, can we borrow your wisdom please?"
Frezak (GM): Oh.
I'll try the door >.>
Greibel pats Gravy
Greibel: It was a good try
The Gravedigger: Thanks, Greibel.
Apheori (GM): You find Amadi standing over someone who appears to have half-fallen out of bed. It's the magic woman from when you first arrived.
Frezak (GM): magic woman?
Apheori (GM): The woman who did some magic.
She has magic.
MAGIC.
Frezak (GM): What magic?
Bear Soup Guy: From the first time we met Amadi
She did a spell thing when we were in CAR
Frezak (GM): What spell?
Ganelon: It made Amadi appear. Maybe.
That may have been a coincidence.
Gaurav: Search for "The woman starts gesturing and chanting, casting a spell you don't recognise." in the log if you want to go over that bit again.
Frezak (GM): Yeah, I thought Amadi just popped in by being Amadi.
Gaurav: She kind of got upstaged by Amadi unfortunately. I don't think we even spoke to her after Amadi showed up, and once she vanished, we just went into the inn without even saying goodbye. She must think we're rude.
Apheori (GM): And now she must think you're really rude.
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Rhu: We apologize for Mrs. Teatime there, Guardian Ekka. She's ... enthusiastic.
Ekka: What...
Teatime?
Ekka picks herself up and glares down at Amadi.
Ekka: What are you doing in my house?
Rhu: No, it's morning. Breakfasttime. But that is Mrs. Teatime. (gestures)
Amadi: Asking answers.
Do you have them? They think you have them. I don't think they do.
Ekka: Right.
What do you need?
Well, no.
First, let me get dressed. Out, all of you.
Frezak (GM): I'll slink out.
Rhu: ... did any of us bother to take a photograph of the rift? Maybe Radek has something from the camera on his eye-robot thing?
Frezak (GM): As much as I can.
Ganelon: I doubt it would come equipped with the ability to take photos.
Maybe this new one. Then again, it may just spit out confetti or serve as an emergency disco ball.
Gaurav: ...
I am going to be so disappointed if we don't need to use an emergency disco ball sometime in this campaign.
Frezak (GM): CONFETTI
Ekka: With Greibel involved, that may only be the beginning of strangeness.
Frezak (GM): When someone scores a crit.
Gaurav: Emergency disco balls in a field of marijuana.
The villain is dispatched in a cloud of blood and guts as sparkling confetti rains from the sky.
Ganelon: Even if it's not designed to do that, all it would take is a well-cut prism and the laser could make a... considerably more dangerous disco ball in a pinch.
Bear Soup Guy: Timothy Leary just twitched in his grave
Pleasure twitch
Gaurav: I don't know who you are, or where you come from, but you've done me a power of good.
Ganelon: So just find me some nice transparent solid like class and I'll get right on that.
Glass, even.
Frezak (GM): I have bottles.
Ganelon: I'd probably need them to be glass all the way through
Gaurav: Is Ekka done getting dressed yet?
Apheori (GM): Ekka comes out onto the porch, followed by Amadi, who you realise didn't actually leave before.
Ekka: Okay, what?
Gaurav: Who wants to make with the explaining?
Frezak (GM): Rhu or Radek.
Maybe Rhu.
He's not mad or rude.
Gaurav: Hahaha, okay. Feel free to interrupt.
Rhu: Guardian Ekka: we come from Sarathi, through paths unclear. We have been investigating the rift that lurks under the large dead tree near here. On the tree, we spied a small tree alight with light which appeared to be guarding the rift. Or against it.
Do any of these things make sense to you? Because we are fair flummoxed.
We also sent a robot through the rift. It saw a beach and Sarathi and what looks like a huge rift 'twixt universes. I don't know what we can do about that, but my lord Hazz'ridan the Wonderful demands that we close it, on this planet at least, so that is what we aim to do.
Ekka: You mean the hole? With the really big tree over it.
The Gravedigger: Very flummoxed.
Amadi: Wonderful!
Rhu: That's the one.
Amadi: Oh, he is wonderful. Wonderful like you wouldn't believe.
Really, I do want to see if you believe it.
See it with eyes.
Never seen it with eyes.
Rhu: He gave us our sanity yesterday right before we were destroyed by the forces of darkness that lurked in the pool of water that the rift is immersed in.
Ekka: What do you want me to do, explain the world to you?
Rhu: He is truly Wonderful.
...
Yes.
The Gravedigger: That would be great.
Radek: Yes, I would appreciate that.
Ekka sighs tiredly.
Ekka: I don't know where you lot are from, but around these parts things don't exactly work that way.
I'll spell this out for you.
We... don't... know.
The Gravedigger: Well that's no fun.
Ekka: The hole appeared.
The land died.
Rhu: When was that?
Ekka: Well, died more than usual. Summers always kill it.
But it didn't come back this time.
Three years past.
Salt's kept the town going since, but the water's toxic. Nothing grows, except what grows wrong.
And strangers come through from time to time. Mostly harmless, some mad, some confused, but they don't hunger for the land here, at least.
Ganelon: Which direction did we follow that river? North?
Ekka: Sure, why not. North and east.
Dammit.
Apheori (GM): OOC.
Gaurav: What direction is the rift from the village?
Apheori (GM): More south, probably.
Unless I specified.
Radek: We found safe water far to the northeast.
Or, apparently safe.
These three seem healthy enough.
Ekka: Aye, the effect is fortunately relatively localised.
For now, at least.
If Sanessee is any indication, this may not remain the case.
Rhu: Why are there no children in this town?
Sanessee?
Ekka: The children... are gone.
They were the most susceptible, and before we realised what was happening...
Sanessee has another such hole, though different. Opened up some 200 years ago, and slowly grew ever since.
Broke the land.
And spreading.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+3 history check to see if "Sanessee" rings any bells in my head
(
12
)
+3
=
15
Apheori (GM): Nope.
Radek: Would it happen to have opened up near a beach?
Apheori (GM): Sanessee is a valley in the Darian highlands.
Ekka: Sanessee is a valley in the Darian highlands.
Apheori (GM): Ghuh.
Rhu writes all this down
Ekka: So no.
Radek: We're looking for a way to close these holes... or vacate the planet, if you know of one.
Ekka: Close them? You might as well look for a way to move an ocean.
Amadi: You can move oceans.
Hide mountains.
Close black holes.
These holes don't seem black.
Unless they are.
Radek: Consider yourself fortunate that they are not.
Amadi: Anything's possible.
Radek: We would all be obliterated.
Rhu: I think they're kind of ... shimmery.
Ekka: Well, if you find a way, that'd be something.
Don't expect anyone to hold their breath.
Amadi: I made a shimmery once. It looked a little like this.
Amadi holds up Rhu's implement.
Amadi: Wrong.
Gaurav: I should warn everybody that I should leave for class in, like, 45-50 mins or so. Sorry for always being the first one out >.<
Bear Soup Guy: No worries
We were planning about a four hour or so session anyway, weren't we?
Apheori (GM): Right.
Rhu: Thank you for this information, Guardian Ekka. Alas, our departure seems indefinitely postponed due to my God's insistence that we find a way to close this hole. With his help, we shall surely move an ocean.
Gaurav: I don't think we're going to get much more information from the villagers. Should we go take another look at the rift, or head straight to the end of the dry river bank?
Frezak (GM): Well she seems to think it's not the river that's the problem but the earth itself.
And I don't know what we could get from the rift.
Unless Radek has some new science idea.
Oh, ask her about the tree(s)
Ganelon: I have no science ideas.
Rhu: Was the tree dead before the hole appeared? When did the litte tree start growing on the big one?
Ekka: The Ancient?
Frezak (GM): We'd need to find out what is powering the rift.
Ekka: Which tree?
Rhu: Tell us about both trees.
Ekka: What trees?
Gaurav: We could try hitting the rift with energy and see what happens.
Ekka: The Ancient is a legend, said to die with the passing of the world. But you're asking about a real tree, aren't you?
Rhu: The large tree growing on the rift, and the little tree growing on the large tree.
Frezak (GM): Not sure about firing a laser at the rift >.>
Maybe from really far.
Rhu: We could try physically blocking it with something ... no, it'd just get disintegrated, wouldn't it. Hm.
Radek: Would you like us to simply take you there?
It would hardly require much time. We have a vehicle capable of flight.
Frezak (GM): Well, if the rift just relocates stuff rather than.. disintegrated it, I would just collapse the sinkhole.
Ekka: Oh, that tree...
It's been dead as long as anyone remembers.
Rest were fine before this, but now they all look the same.
Rhu: Hmm, I wonder if the rift chose it, then. And why ...
Ekka: The silly graft Hodgesons put there is still alive?
Rhu: Ah! That sounds like the little tree I was talking about. What's that all about?
Gaurav: DO all the trees look the same? Like, do they all look dead or do they all look *identically* dead?
Ekka: Shalott. What else?
Apheori (GM): They just all look dead.
Dried out.
Bleached.
Rhu: Shalott?
Ekka: You haven't tried it? Our gal makes... well, I wouldn't say it's the best, but it's certainly strong. She came back from the big city and really made a place for herself, that one.
Probably half the reason most of the folks are still here. Too drunk to leave.
Rhu: Ah. I know that feeling. So why did Hodgesons put a graft on the big tree? And who is he? Or she?
Ekka: Genri Hodgeson's boys. They were drunk, thought it'd be funny.
Nobody expected it to survive, of course, but they had a bit of magic what made it work.
Radek: What is it supposed to do?
Ekka: Do?
It was a prank!
At least I think it was a prank.
Probably a prank.
Rhu: It seems to be ... interacting with the rift somehow. Do you know where the pool of water that the rift is immersed in comes from?
Ekka: You mean besides groundwater?
Rain was sparse even before, but the land has its own water.
Rhu: It ... vanished of its own accord yesterday. And then reappeared. And the rift seemed to be scared of it. If rifts can know fear.
Ekka: Which, conveniently, all got poisoned.
Vanished, eh?
Did you magic it somehow?
Rhu: Nope. Well. The paladin fell in. He was maybe a bit magical.
Ekka: Fell in?
That's dangerous magic. Dark.
Amadi: He's not dead, you know. Not here, but not dead.
Rhu: Yay!
Amadi: Or does dead just mean 'not here'?
Are you dead? Are you here?
Fuzzy little world.
The Gravedigger: In my experience dead is lying at the bottom of the hole.
And not getting out.
Ever.
Amadi: How strange for you.
Ekka snorts.
Radek: Looks like we're going back to investigate.
Rhu: Would you like to come with us to the rift? Perhaps you can tell us something about the dark magic of the mysterious pool.
The Gravedigger: Let's throw random things at it and see what happens.
Rhu: That is a most excellent plan.
Ekka: Argh, really?
You barge into my house, you interrogate me, and now you want to kidnap me too? Is there no end?
The Gravedigger: Who talked about kidnapping?
Is everyone in this place insane?
Rhu: ...
The Gravedigger: Come on, guys.
I don't see us finding anything useful here.
Everyone is just mental.
Ekka: I'm kidding.
Dunno what good it'll do you.
Amadi: It's a different Hazz. That's what's wrong.
This one's a different one.
I mean, it's all Hazz, but there's different heads. Like a spider.
But what's wrong about it?
The oranges?
Rhu: Oranges?
The Gravedigger sighs.
Amadi: Purple ones.
The Gravedigger: Let's just go fire lasers at the rift or something.
Standing here talking to the mad midget isn't gonna help us solve this.
Radek: Agreed.
Rhu: Completely agree with heading to the rift. I think we should bring these two along, though I'm willing to be overruled.
The Gravedigger: What for?
Drop the midget in and see what happens?
SHe has some form of teleportation or space-bending power.
Radek: I've heard worse ideas.
The Gravedigger: Come on, little lady.
Rhu waves vaguely and mutter something about insight and perception checks
The Gravedigger: Let's go do some hole science.
Frezak (GM): I don't see what I'd perceive and my insight sucks.
Gaurav: No, I meant they might have higher insight and perception than us. Or history, for that matter. Since we've already looked at it; instead of looking at it again, we should get other people to look at it. It might do nothing, in which case we're right back where we started, but it might help.
Frezak (GM): I have banging perception, man.
Really.
I can roll +19 every 5 minutes.
Gaurav: WOAH
okay
Amadi: I've done hole science. Wound up sinking the city.
Frezak (GM): And Rp-wise, the old woman doesn't seem to know anything or particularly want to help.
And Amadi.. well. >.>
She just gibbering.
Gaurav: well, then, leave them behind and go see what these level 2 eyes can see?
Frezak (GM): Yeah
Gaurav: Rhu is religious, he's fascinated by people who gibber.
Frezak (GM): And try some more active stuff with the rift.
Lasers, magic....
Gaurav: And I personally find their gibbering entertaining, but maybe that's just me.
Apheori (GM): Mind your time.
Frezak (GM): It's entertaining, but not helping our characters get anywhere.
Gaurav: Hee I'm on it
Frezak (GM): Gravy has a job to do. he'd like to get it done.
Gaurav: Counting down all the things I need to push to 4:45pm instead of doing them now >.>
fair enough
Ganelon: Onwards, then?
Frezak (GM): Yarr
Ganelon: I don't think our solution will be found at the rift itself, but clues... perhaps.
Frezak (GM): Yarr.
Rhu: Thank you for your help, Guardian Ekka and Mrs. Teatime. We shall head to the rift ourselves, see what we can learn, and report back to you when we can. Thank you for your help!
Rhu shakes everybody's hand and heads to CAR
Ekka: Uh-huh.
Frezak (GM): I'm just gonna clomp out.
Ganelon: Likewise.
Amadi follows.
Ganelon: No farewells. Just grumbling.
Gaurav: Okay, that's time for me, I'm afraid! Sorry to bail out. If you keep going, remember that you get +1 perception when within 5 spaces of Rhu, and that I can do 1d20+12 perception checks or 1d20+8 religion (including half-levels)
Frezak (GM): Oh, so... +20 perception then.
Whoo.
Apheori (GM): We should call it. I need to pack and stuff.
Frezak (GM): righ
Gaurav: okay
byeeeeeee
Bear Soup Guy: Adios!
Apheori (GM): Should we do tuesday?
Frezak (GM): Provisionally.
I don't know what I'm doing next Tuesday yet.
Bear Soup Guy: I'll probably be free
Ganelon: I almost certainly will.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Let's aim for that, then. And if it's a no, just... let everyone know or something.
Frezak (GM): I'll probably know before this week is done.

Session 8

Apheori (GM): So what, you all were going to the hole again or something?
Also it should be noted that at least Radek and Gravy probably expect the car to run out of battery at some point. Maybe. You could roll a thingy to try to tell what's powering it, because it could last indefinitely.
Or did you already roll that?
Bear Soup Guy: I don't think we checked that
Although now I remember I was gone most of last session
Or was that the session before?
Ganelon: I'll roll a thingy.
Bear Soup Guy: Hrrrrrm
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+10
(
3
)
+10
=
13
Mm, yes, these cup-holders are definitely in fine working order.
Apheori (GM): Snrk.
Ganelon: If there was a "satisfaction" gauge on this vehicle, we'd be doing great.
Apheori (GM): So I guess all you know is it's not gravity-based because otherwise it'd have been wrecked. Which only kind of narrows it down since folks'll drop in whatever the hell kind of power source they feel like.
Ganelon: It's probably magic.
Apheori (GM): Oh, they're almost all at least somewhat magic.
Ganelon: Maybe I'll just spare us the trouble of it running out and convert the whole thing into magical dust.
But not right now.
Apheori (GM): Snrk.
Gaurav: How far away is the tree? Is it practicable to walk there from the village if CAR breaks down?
Apheori (GM): Three days, someone said.
Gaurav: Also, if we're running low on battery, or might be, we might want to go follow the river upstream first. Althoguh that could end very, very badly if we do run out of battery there.
eeks
Apheori (GM): Oh, and I figured out the geography!
The river is really long!
I mean... well, it's kind of long.
Gaurav: YAY! do you have maps? can we have maps?
Apheori (GM): It seems long to ME.
I have a blob.
There's a little blob above it.
And some dots. For cities.
And an X for the hole.
Frezak (GM): Hooole
Gaurav: nice! I guess it'd be cheating for us to get a copy? We should probably be drawing our own map or something.
Apheori (GM): Get to a city proper and just buy one or something.
Gaurav: I worry that this campaign is going to end with Gravy ascending to some sort of hole-based goddom
Frezak (GM): Ask the willagers where the big city is!
'descending', surely.
Gaurav: Did I say "worry"? I meant "excited".
Apheori (GM): But seriously, don't buy a map. I can't draw.
Gaurav: So: are we at the hole? Did we bring Amadi?
Apheori (GM): You're in the car and Amadi climbed in uninvited.
Gaurav: So: hole or river?
Or even
Rhu: So: hole or river?
Gaurav: P.S. lunch today is kale and it is delicious.
Ganelon: Juuuust so you know.
Roll20 actually has a thing for this.
Like if we want images of stuff our characters own, such as maps.
Gaurav: Do they have tools for that? Or do you just upload an image?
Ganelon: It's a specific feature of the journal.
Amadi: Oh, can I just draw a blob somewhere?
Apheori (GM): Er, oops.
Gan: Can I draw a blob directly in it?
Ganelon: No, that would be inadvisable anyways since this is almost worse than Microsoft Paint.
Frezak (GM): You mean image handouts, Gan?
Amadi starts drawing something on Greibel's back.
Ganelon: But you can upload an image to the Handouts thing in the journal.
Yarr, that.
Gaurav: Have the pigeons poop us a map.
Greibel twitches uncomfortably
Gaurav: like, on the ground. Not ... never mind.
Frezak (GM): Draw on the porridge.
Gaurav: Can characters upload stuff? Or is it DM only?
haha, you'll tickle it
Apheori (GM): This thing doesn't support vector images. >.>
Well, ANYWAY.
FLYING.
FLY SOMEWHERE.
YOUR DM COMMANDS YOU.
Frezak (GM): Hole, I think.
And push Amadi in.
Rhu: I vote river, but ... okay.
Frezak (GM): Well.
Rhu takes the car up and points it holewards
Frezak (GM): What could we do with the river?
I was given to understand that it was the earth that was the problem.
Apheori (GM): Follow it elsewhere. Get information.
Become very confused.
Frezak (GM): Dammit.
Back in 15 >.>
Apheori (GM): Ghuh.
Rhu: I thought there was a hint of something interesting at the end of it, but perusing the logs I find nothing.
Greibel: You can lead a party of reluctant adventurers to the river
But you can't make us drink
Amadi: But you will drink. You will.
But will you drink with gills?
Gaurav: Plus, Rhu still thinks that something might happen when Amadi and the Hole get to know each other. Plus plus, I don't think we ever got Greibel to poke into the druid magic around the little tree on the big tree.
Greibel looks disappointed "I...I don't have gills." :(
Amadi: Look! An idiot!
Amadi points down toward a zombie.
Apheori (GM): At least it might be a zombie.
Greibel: Exciting.
Rhu: You can't drink with gills. That's like drinking with alveoli. It doesn't make sense.
Woah!
Gaurav: How far from the tree are we?
Amadi pauses, looks confused, and then points toward Rhu instead.
Apheori (GM): Near but not at, I suppose.
Also let's hold up for Frezak to get back.
Radek chuckles quietly to himself.
Gaurav: We'll stay airborne and watch this zombie while we wait. Can you describe him/her for us?
Frezak (GM): Eh, you can keep going.
Apheori (GM): Okay, the zombie... it's kind of big, appears to be rotting, wearing torn clothes, and lurching around aimlessless.
There's something of a hole in its head.
Rhu mutters to himself: "Holes ... there's something about everything that's going on and holes ..."
Apheori (GM): Big like the large guy in town, not a flat-out giant.
Greibel: Poor guy. It's probably really hard for him to play guitar.
Rhu: We'll get him a double bass.
Amadi: He remembers.
Radek: ...What?
Amadi: You know, seventeen.
Radek: I don't know any such thing.
Greibel: Seventeen must be his favorite double bass song...
Apheori (GM): Kyrule likes threes. Optimist. It'll bite him in the arse.
Amadi: Kyrule likes threes. Optimist. It'll bite him in the arse.
Apheori (GM): Ghah.
Gaurav: Should I do a religion check to see if I know who Kyrule is? Or is it something obvious that Rhu would know?
Apheori (GM): You don't know.
She's rambling.
Gaurav: Rhu knows that name, though. Hazz'ridan mentioned it earlier, while we were chatting.
Apheori (GM): Oh, okay.
Well you still don't know who it is. >.>
Rhu: (to Amadi) Who's Kyrule? Hazz'ridan spoke of him when we ... communed yesterday.
Amadi starts giggling.
Gaurav: Plus, Rhu is slightly in awe of Amadi and assumes that everything she says must contain a nugget of deep wisdom &c.
Apheori (GM): Bahahahah.
Sorry.
I hope don't ruin this too much for Ellemerr...
Ganelon: See, it's stuff like this that makes Radek disdainful of the gods.
Amadi: The Hazz would know! Of course it would. The Hazz knows lots of things, has a thing for knowing, you know, knowing things. Lots of things. But not here. Here it's not so much about that. It's much more subtle. Threads.
Ganelon: Everyone's crazy, but divine people are just the *worst* sort of crazy.
Gaurav: Hey, Rhu's god just spoke with him yesterday. He's not at his criticalest. He'll be back.
Amadi: Bean threads, tapioca, and tentacles!
Rhu nods sagely.
Apheori (GM): Amadi's crazy ain't divine crazy, though.
At least I don't think it is.
But someone could totally start a religion around it nonetheless.
Ganelon: She talks about gods enough for Radek to be convinced they're responsible for her madness.
Greibel: I'd join a religion of secular lunacy
err
Apheori (GM): Heh, he might be onto somethere there.
Bear Soup Guy: OOC
Apheori (GM): Heh.
Bear Soup Guy: Does this game have a "mad god"?
Gaurav: No no, I love the idea of Greibel just thinking and thinking and thinking and then saying something completely random.
Apheori (GM): Just one?
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Apheori (GM): XD
Does it tell you anything that Amadi's sanity bonus is currently down as '10 - (?) + cat'
?
Bear Soup Guy: That tells me wonderful things
Gaurav: only one cat? that's not very insane.
Apheori (GM): She exists as a person most of the time. How insane could she get?
Or was that the cat?
Well, the cat is insane, if that makes things worse.
Amadi hums the Star Wars theme song.
Ganelon: Yeah, you can't just ignore the cat's opinion on things.
Rhu: Oooh, that's dramatic.
Greibel pantomimes music conducting
Gaurav: brb 2 mins
Apheori (GM): Are we all here now?
Gaurav: yes!
Bear Soup Guy: Beedle
Apheori (GM): Frezak?
Gaurav: Have we seen any roads while we've been on this planet? Or any vehicles at the village?
Apheori (GM): They had carts!
Roads appeared to be hard dirt.
But there's a lot of hard dirt.
Gaurav: Did we ever see the carts harnessed to anything?
Bear Soup Guy imagines the willagers pulling each other around in carts
Bear Soup Guy: Willy sillagers
Ganelon: Frezak's away.
Mike B.: Damn Republicans cutting funding for infrastructure.
Ganelon: I'm not sure what for, but it should be a while.
Apheori (GM): None of the carts ever moved.
When you were there.
So you don't know what they do wit hthem.
Rhu: Mysterious.
Bear Soup Guy: Clearly some sort of arcane cart ritual
Gaurav: Maybe that's what the giant was trying to tell us
Bear Soup Guy: "Watch out for those magic carts"
Gaurav: Maybe he has to pull them around
Amadi: Vanishing carts.
They fit in your pocket, but they really weigh you down.
Apheori (GM): Okay, so do something, then.
Although this would all go a lot better if we could ever have a session with everyone entirely here.
Ganelon: It really would.
Bear Soup Guy: Considering our time zone discrepancies and immense potential for distraction, we still do pretty well
Ganelon: So there's a zombie underneath us?
Gaurav: BSG: Truth!
Apheori (GM): Yes.
And yes.
Gaurav: Does the zombie look male? Or is it not obvious given decomposition?
Ganelon: Would this be a magical zombie?
Or one of those disease-based ones the kids are all talking about these days?
Apheori (GM): Er... what's the difference?
Judging by the size and general proportions it appears it was male. Now it's mostly a grey heap of ambling grossness.
Well, okay, slight overstatement perhaps, but it looks like a zombie.
Rhu: Ew.
Ganelon: Well, there could be quite a few differences, but the two I'm primarily concerned with are:
- Is it infectious?
- Did someone animate this corpse intentionally (with magic)?
Apheori (GM): Hmm.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+12 perception check to see if I can determine anything about the creature
(
9
)
+12
=
21
Apheori (GM): Good questions!
Gaurav: ... bearing in mind that Avengers have an attack that only works against the undead, so I guess we had to take ... zombie classes in school
Ganelon: Technically it could also be a magic zombie if... residual magics played a part in its creation.
Apheori (GM): Rhu discerns that it was probably animated with magic.
He also notices that the hole in its head is glowing slightly.
Gaurav: Same sort of glow as the tree and the pool?
Rhu suddenly has a sinking feeling in his stomach.
Apheori (GM): ...yes.
Rhu: You ... you don't suppose that's Azir, do you?
Radek: Eh?
Greibel: No silly, that's a zombie
Rhu: Well, he vanished in the glowing pool. Maybe he came back ... not entirely alive. And glowing.
Ganelon: Well if he's bringing it up, what would you like me to roll to see if it resembles Azir?
Apheori (GM): Unless you suddenly forgot how big Azir is, I don't think you need to roll. >.>
Unless he got bigger.
Bear Soup Guy: The bloating occuring with corpsification could get somebody bigger :P
Apheori (GM): Hmm.
What should you roll?
For that.
Bear Soup Guy: Then again they probably lose a lot of moisture too
Apheori (GM): Naw, it doesn't look like Azir.
Doesn't look like anyone in particular.
Also looks to have been dead for awhile.
And the hole makes it harder to tell much...
Bear Soup Guy: Time travel zombies
Actually, I like that one
Greibel: Time travel zombies...
Amadi: No, I don't think you want to eat that. It's testicles, you know.
Greibel: Huh....good to know.
Amadi: Hmm?
Greibel: The testicles thing
Amadi: Oh, I didn't order it.
Greibel: Oh, that's quite alright then
Rhu, did you order testicles?
Rhu shakes his head
Rhu: (to the zombie) "HELLO DOWN THERE"
Apheori (GM): The zombie walks into a tree and groans horribly.
Greibel: Awww, he likes you!
Rhu quivers
Rhu: It's disgusting. I think we should put it out of its misery.
Radek: I never did understand why some wizards prefer to animate organic bodies. It's simply lazy, it is.
Frezak (GM): Wassup?
Wassgoinoooon?
Gaurav: Hullo!
Bear Soup Guy: We're looking at a zombie
Gaurav: There's a zombie.
Like he said.
Frezak (GM): Whazzit doin' ?
Radek: Sure, they might be able to move if their muscles are intact, but for how long, and how well?
Frezak (GM): ZOMBIE?
WHY ARE WE NOT BURYING IT?
Rhu: We should kill it.
Greibel: Well that would just be redundant
Rhu: We should kill it _again_.
Kill it further.
Radek: Certainly.
Mike B.: I've met people in D&D games with absolutely no life, but this is ridiculous.
The Gravedigger: Burn it.
Ashes don't have muscles.
Anyone have a flamethrower?
Bear Soup Guy: Thanks, Mike!
Ganelon: I think he's making a zombie joke.
Bear Soup Guy: Oh, I just got that
Hah!
Ganelon: Rather than just being incredibly rude.
Apheori (GM): Oooh.
Mike B.: My jokes usually have that effect.
Gaurav: Rhu's antipathy for zombies aside, we should probably just leave it and move on. It might be important later. Or something.
Frezak (GM): Aside from the the fact that the 'people' you meet 'in' D&D games are NPCs and therefore of course not alive what with being figments of a collective imagination.
Apheori (GM): Gaurav: Don't say things like that. Play the character, screw things up!
Frezak (GM): Where is this zomble, then?
Apheori (GM): Or not.
Under you. Not directly, but... well, you know.
Frezak (GM): Where are /we/ ?
Apheori (GM): You're like hovering above it. You were on the way to the tree/hole. Kind of near it but not at.
Frezak (GM): We could throw it into the hole.
Gaurav: Ooooh. I like that idea.
Mike B.: I say we make it a slave.
Frezak (GM): I have this grappling hook, right....
Bear Soup Guy: He and Rasputin would probably get along splendidly
Gaurav: Are you saying this in character?
The Gravedigger: Let's drop it into the rift.
I can use Mr. Grapples.
Rhu: EW! Bring that THING on board? It SMELLS.
The Gravedigger: Now, have it dangle.
Greibel: Pfff. You can't smell it from here
The Gravedigger: This way we don't bet bitten or clawed or gooked.
Rhu: ...
What if it climbs up the rope?
The Gravedigger: It's going to have a grappling hook going through it's body.
I doubt it's going to be agile enough to ninja it's way up.
Rhu: ...
Okay
Greibel: But just think
"Zombie Ninjas"....
Radek: We could also just cut the rope at any point.
Rhu: But if it does anything funny, I'm landing the CAR on top of its head
And then I'm doing that again
Yeah, that's true.
Okay.
Radek: You're not crashing this vehicle into anything while I'm aboard.
Rhu: It might be useful to see what the pool is up to today vis-a-vis elven bodies before jumping in.
The Gravedigger: All righty.
Time to snatch up some dead meat.
Rhu: Not crashing, landing. You won't feel a thing. Well, maybe a squishy sort of thump.
The Gravedigger: Sure.
This guy will keep.
A squelch.
Greibel sings cattily "We're gonna catch a zoooombie. We're gonna catch a zooooooombie!"
Rhu: That's the one.
Frezak (GM): IT'S GRAPPLE TIME
Mr Grapples! FLYYYY
rolling 1D20+5
(
3
)
+5
=
8
noooo
Mr. Grapples!
You betray me!
Apheori (GM): Dude, you missed. You missed a zombie trying to walk through a tree.
HOW?
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Frezak (GM): BECAUSE I AM NOT PROFICIENT WITH GRAPPLING HOOKS AS A WEAPON.
TURNS OUT GRAVEDIGGERS DONT DO THAT MUCH.
Radek shoots a look of disappointment at Gravy.
Frezak (GM): Can I try again, kind DM?
Ganelon: It may be hard to read through all the chrome.
Mike B.: If anything, the zombie is probably pissed off that we tried to take him to school.
Frezak (GM): That look hurts.
Because it meant that he had hope in Gravy.
Oh, and did we roll perception on him?
Gaurav: Maybe we could dangle something in front of it and lure it along?
Apheori (GM): You didn't wreck the hook.
You can always try again if things are still... well, there and stuff. And not wrecked or what have you.
Frezak (GM): I'll try another hooking.
rolling 1D20+5
(
12
)
+5
=
17
Apheori (GM): And I dunno, did anyone roll perception?
Gaurav: Yep. I rolled 9+12=21 perception.
Frezak (GM): BAH.
That's my minimum.
I gan get 21 on a crit fail.
Apheori (GM): Roll for damage.
Gaurav: We noticed that "it was probably animated with magic.
He also notices that the hole in its head is glowing slightly. "
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D8+4
(
3
)
+4
=
7
Apheori (GM): Okay, it didn't fall apart.
Frezak (GM): Brill.
Gaurav: YAY!
Frezak (GM): LIFT OFF
Ganelon: Hooks are a 1d8? Yikes.
Frezak (GM): It's a heavy Improvised.
Gaurav: Say what you will, this zombie is going to get one sweet burial at some point.
Apheori (GM): How quickly do you lift off?
Frezak (GM): Fuck yeah.
Rhu: Ew ew ew ew ew ew ew.
Frezak (GM): Not TOO quickly.
We don't want to rip it apart.
Rhu: We're in the air, so we're not lifting -- just traveling horizontally. I think.
Unless there are many trees in the way.
Apheori (GM): You need to pick it up.. Hence lift.
Frezak (GM): We don't want to smash it against things.
Apheori (GM): Unless Rhu wants to drag it along the ground.
Did he forget to lift?
Gaurav: We could walk it like a dog on a leash. Hmm, smashing it versus it falling apart bceause of gravity, tough call.
Let's say he does the sensible thing ...
Apheori (GM): Which one is sensible?
Frezak (GM): Dragging it will tear it to bits.
Rhu lifts it a foot off the ground and heads towards the hole
Gaurav: ... and see what happens?
Apheori (GM): It dangles and makes funny noises.
Waves its arms a bit.
Tries to grab a passing tree.
Frezak (GM): Thats... interesting.
Gaurav: Aw, poor thing.
Frezak (GM): Has anyone tried talking to it?
Amadi: More fish.
Please.
The Gravedigger: HELLO DOWN THERE MISTER ZOMBIE.
Greibel: It's so nice that we can have pets like this.
Greibel strokes Rasputin
Apheori (GM): The zombie doesn't appear to notice. It grabs a tree.
Frezak (GM): Huh.
Apheori (GM): It clings to the tree.
Gaurav: Crap.
Rhu stops CAR
Apheori (GM): It falls off the tree.
The Gravedigger: Radek?
Take off it's arm.
Apheori (GM): its
Ganelon: I'll try this.
Rhu: I think it let go of the tree?
I can't see from up here! What's going on?
Apheori (GM): It looks like its arm already fell off.
Rhu: ...
Frezak (GM): Too slow >.>
Huh.
Poor zomble.
Rhu: is it holding on to anything?
Frezak (GM): ONWARDS
TO GLORY
Rhu continues driving slowly towards the pool
Apheori (GM): The arm fell on the ground.
Heh.
You reach the hole!
Gaurav: YAY!
Apheori (GM): It looks like before, full and kind of... alluring.
Frezak (GM): HOLE.
Peer down to look for a paladin.
Rhu: ... is it just me, or is that pool kind of ... alluring?
I'm not sure I've ever been allured by a pool before.
The Gravedigger: NOPE.
NOT A LITTLE.
Apheori (GM): And Gravy's right - as soon as you notice the feeling passes.
Rhu: That was odd.
Apheori (GM): It's just a hole, not calling to you, not making you lose your mind.
Unless...
Gaurav: Can we see the hole from up here? I guess it's back underwater now? But maybe it's shiny?
Apheori (GM): Radek, Greibel: d20s
It's just a water-filled sinkhole.
A bit shimmery.
Amadi leans out and peers into the hole.
Amadi: Interesting. I can almost see my house.
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
4
)
=
4
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You want to go in there.
Bear Soup Guy: Of course I do
Greibel: Anyone for a swim?
Rhu: Greibel, Radek: Ekka the Guardian told us that the little glowy tree up there was magicked by "Genri Hodgeson's boys". Could you check to see if you can figure out what kind of magic it is?
Radek:
rolling 1d20
(
20
)
=
20
Gaurav: WOAH
Frezak (GM): Someone smack Greibel, please.
Gaurav: YAY
Ganelon: WHOOOO
Greibel dons a previously unseen pair of swim trunks
Apheori (GM): Radek: You are now Greibel.
Ganelon: I will gladly smack him, though I can't promise it will introduce sense to his brain.
Frezak (GM): SOMEONE BEAT THE DRUID PLEASE.
Bear Soup Guy: O_o
Ganelon: NNOOOOOOOO
Frezak (GM): I'm busy holding this zomble.
WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?
Radek went beyond sanity.
And out the other side.
Ganelon: So where is Greibel?
Is he me?
Apheori (GM): Also Greibel.
Frezak (GM): What.
Greibel: Weird. I don't remember taking any acid today.
Gaurav: o.0
Apheori (GM): But right now you're more Greibel than he is.
Frezak (GM): My Ghast is flabbered.
Apheori (GM): And now it's back to normal.
You both are, rather.
Greibel: Well...I'm keeping the swim trunks
Ganelon: Well then.
I'm gonna sit my stoner ass right back down in my seat and go check out that tree.
Frezak (GM): Maaan.
SHit just got real.
Gaurav: That was a very nice roll.
Amadi: Okay, Radek is no longer Greibel, but Greibel now wants to check out the tree.
Apheori (GM): Er, sorry.
Okay, Radek is no longer Greibel, but Greibel now wants to check out the tree.
Greibel: Oh yeah, so what's the story on this tree, guys?
Should I check it out?
Frezak (GM): We wanna drop the Zomble first?
Or after?
I'm sure he can hang around for a bit.
Rhu drives the car until the zombie is about a foot above the center of the pool
Rhu: either/or. I figure once we drop him in we'll land, so Radek and Greibel might have a better view of the tree from up here.
Apheori (GM): The zombie struggles as it gets closer.
Rhu: Huh.
Radek rubs his temple.
Radek: It's... it's a wonder he can even talk like that.
Ganelon: Under the influence.
Amadi: Talking is easy. Words come cheap.
Now sense and meaning and production, those are more expensive. Words with power.
I had to pay a whole three euros.
And then the waiter took it away before I finished.
Greibel stares blankly
Rhu: That's awful.
What is a "euro"?
Amadi: Very shiny, like death.
The porridge purrs.
Rhu looks at Amadi askance, then back at the group
Amadi: Rasputin knows.
Rhu: So: drop the zombie first?
Then we can examine the tree and then land. Or maybe the zombie will explode everything and we'll all die. Either way.
Radek: Drop it now before it has the chance to struggle free.
Amadi: Dip him in the river who loves water.
Frezak (GM): Yarr.
Rhu: Oh-kay ...
Amadi: Urinating dog, urinating dog?
Rhu lowers the car slowly so that the zombie enters the pool feet first
Amadi: I don't feel right.
Frezak (GM): I'll need a new grapple >.>
Apheori (GM): The zombie writhes.
And thrashes.
And spashes a lot.
Gaurav: Aw, poor thing.
Apheori (GM): And explodes.
Greibel pats Amadi reassuringly. "There, there. All dogs do that." *whispers* "They can't use toilets."
Frezak (GM): Crumbs.
I pull up the rope.
What's at the end of it?
Rhu: So, I guess we're staying out of the pool today.
Apheori (GM): Is there a roll to dodge the splatter or something?
Frezak (GM): We are in a car above the hole.
Anything up to 50 feet away.
Apheori (GM): Right, but presumably at least one of you was... well, watching.
Ganelon: Now if only I were still Greibel.
Frezak (GM): I was.
Ganelon: Typical rules would make it an attack against reflex.
Frezak (GM): Makes sense.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Ganelon: As in, roll a d20 + attack modifiers and then compare to each relevant character's reflex defense.
Apheori (GM): Then Gravy got a splat in the face.
Ganelon: Otherwise, you could call it a dexterity roll.
Frezak (GM): Delightful.
Rhu: All our reflexes are +1 because we're level 2 now btw
Gaurav: OOC sorry
Frezak (GM): I'll wipe my face clean with my shitty lasercloak
Gaurav: Rhu should roll too; he would have been looking over the edge so lowered the car at the right rate
my reflex is 14
Frezak (GM): Same as me!
Reflex buddies!
Gaurav high-fives Frezak
Apheori (GM): It misses Rhu.
Frezak (GM): What?
Ganelon: Mine is actually huge because intelligence makes it higher.
Frezak (GM): How does it miss him?
Apheori (GM): Different glob?
Or do all globs use the same roll?
Because that just seems really weird.
Frezak (GM): hrmph.
Gaurav: Rhu chose that exact moment to look ahead instead of over the edge?
Frezak (GM): Well I'll wipe myself and see if Mr. Grapples is intact.
Apheori (GM): Tell me the norm.
TELL ME.
Frezak (GM): I'd have just made a single +4 vs Ref against any onlookers.
Ganelon: But the norm is area attacks being rolled separately for each target and then damage being rolled for all the ones who are hit.
Gaurav: BUT I LIKE YOUR WAY BETTER DM
Frezak (GM): SHH YOU
Ganelon: THIS IS IMPORTANT
SHE MUST LEARN
Apheori (GM): Thank you, Gan.
You are correct. I need to learn.
Ganelon: Even if it costs Gravy some dignity in the process.
Frezak (GM): What dignity?
Apheori (GM): How do diseases work?
Frezak (GM): They're... uh.
Apheori (GM): Oh, nevermind.
Gaurav: There's a section on them in the back of the Player's Handbook somewhere if you have the PDF
Ganelon: I could explain.
Gaurav: brb 2-5 mins and no longer
Frezak (GM): It's in the Dungeon Master's Guide.
Every day you make an... endurance check to see whether a disease progresses, stays stable, or regresses.
Apheori (GM): What's your fortitude?
Frezak (GM): Fort is... 16.
Ganelon: Probably huge.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Ganelon: If not Gnoll Huge.
Apheori (GM): Weird.
Anyway, moving on...
Frezak (GM): Gravy is as tough as you get without eating carrion for a living.
Gaurav: back
so what was on the end of the rope when Gravy pulled it up?
Apheori (GM): Oh.
Frezak (GM): Dunno yet.
Apheori (GM): The hook and some zombie bits.
Frezak (GM): MYSTERIES
Apheori (GM): I'M PAYING ATTENTION.
Frezak (GM): Sure.
So what IS at the end of the rope?
Rhu mutters "ew", while keeping a wary eye to make sure the zombie bits don't start writhing or anything.
Apheori (GM): THE HOOK AND SOME ZOMBIE BITS.
Rhu or walking
Mike B.: http://youtu.be/t0EqnoaPNLI
Rhu: I think we should examine the little tree, then land.
The Gravedigger: Radek, you want one of these bits?
For science?
Gaurav: ooh, good point
Amadi: No!
Don't!
Bad!
Lettuce.
Radek: Oh yes, definitely
Amadi: Don't touch it.
The Gravedigger: Here. Take your pick.
Amadi: Don't. Just don't.
Frezak (GM): I'm assuming we all wear gloves.
Of some form.
Amadi: Wrong wrong like a wrong in a wrong wrong wrong.
Ganelon: I'm just putting it in a bottle.
Frezak (GM): Given that we are equipped for a hostile environment and potential combat zone.
Ganelon: No touching necessary.
Frezak (GM): Also I have gloves because I use a shovel a lot.
Amadi: Went right through the rubber, right through the glass, right through the brain, through the wall through the sun through the world and it all ended with the shards everywhere the trees were shards broken shards shattered shards amidst the black with no glow, no shine, no gleaming amidst the black, only black and cold and no silence.
Amadi clutches her head and starts whimpering.
Frezak (GM): I'll shake off the other bits.
And put the hook away.
TO THE TREE
Greibeltime!
Radek: Would this be a horrible blackness, perchance?
Gaurav: It's _always_ Greibeltime.
Frezak (GM): YEAAAAAHHH
Rhu drives us towards the little tree, but at a safe distance
Amadi sits up slowly and stares at Radek, before yelling, "IT IS ALL BLACKNESS!"
Amadi: Is. Was. Looked to the future. Weren't none.
Amadi mumbles.
Greibel cracks his knuckles theatrically
Ganelon: I'll make a point of him not responding to that.
Rhu: (to Radek) What happened? Is she okay?
Radek: Am I the expert on crazy people now?
The Gravedigger: Is the crazy babbling senseless girl okay?
SHe's breathing. That's about our diagnostic limits really.
Rhu: You were talking to her right before she ... you know ... (makes a sign indicating hysteria)
And you are the expert on most things.
The Gravedigger: That's true.
Amadi: It didn't happen. The world ended and we couldn't stop it, so we broke it all, we broke it, and we said it would be okay, it would work out different this time, but we didn't mention the sacrifice, that it would take a sacrifice to work and even then it wouldn't work, and he would be the sacrifice because we loved him and we knew him and it'd work, except it wouldn't work because we lost the dreamer and the madness and the cat. Catman is really a cat, man.
There are no cats.
I don't want to go back.
YOU CAN'T MAKE ME.
Greibel: Woah woah woah
Gaurav: Catman would be a quality superhero.
Greibel: You need to center yourself, let out the bad energy
Rhu: ... what sort of sacrifice?
Amadi stops and looks around, confused.
Amadi: I'm sorry, did someone say something?
Rhu sighs
Radek: One might infer that she knows something, but if so, it would be next to impossible to distinguish it from everything else she says.
Apheori (GM): (to Rhu) And who are you? You're rather cute, now aren't you!
Amadi: (to Rhu) And who are you? You're rather cute, now aren't you!
Apheori (GM): Ghah.
She knows many things.
But are any of them even relvant?
The Gravedigger: Let us just get to that tree, eh?
Ganelon: Exactly.
Apheori (GM): Mysteries!
Radek: Yes. Now magic, there's something I can make sense of.
Amadi: Oh, how interesting!
Rhu: She is very deep. But sometimes she is very shallow. There's a truth in there somewhere, though, I can feel it.
The Gravedigger: I dig holes in dirt, not in words.
Rhu drives us over to the tree
Apheori (GM): So tree. The tree is before you, glowing slightly and growing happily out of the other tree.
Amadi: Looks almost like magic, that.
Radek: Yes... but what kind, I wonder?
Ganelon: Arcana roll?
Frezak (GM): NATURE?
Ganelon: Which should actually be +11 because I forgot we were level 2?
Frezak (GM): I have... 2 arcana >.>
Apheori (GM): Roll whatever!
Frezak (GM): I'll make some nature goodness.
rolling 1D20+9
(
14
)
+9
=
23
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+11
(
10
)
+11
=
21
MAGIC MEN
ROLLIN' GOOD.
Actually mine's strictly average.
Greibel:
rolling 1d20 + 12 NATURE
(
14
)
+12
=
26
Rhu: I'll just stare at it and see if I notice anything.
Apheori (GM): Gravy, Greibel: It's not natural. The tree is growing off nothing, feeding itself purely on... well, probably magic. The bark is weird, the leaves are weird, and it's generally shaped weirdly.
Greibel: You get this urge to try talking to it.
Rhu: No, hang on, I'll check it for religious significance.
rolling 1d20+8 religion check
(
10
)
+8
=
18
The Gravedigger: That's not like any tree I know. It's not naturally sustained.
Greibel: HELLO TREE! DO NOT FEAR US! WE COME IN PEACE! EXCEPT...WELL, WE WANT TO EXPERIMENT ON YOU!
The Gravedigger: EXPERIMENT PEACEFULLY THOUGH
Apheori (GM): Gan: The tree is more magical than natural, but you're not sure what kind of magic it is, if it's even anything you've ever seen. It's not like the hole/rift magic, and it's also not like what a tree graft should be. It's like whatever magic was originally used was later changed into something else, probably by the rift below.
Greibel: The tree doesn't really move or do anything in response, but you also get the impression that it did indeed hear you.
Radek: This is a mutation of... something.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: It seems like something that could be cultish, but fortunately no cults have found it.
Radek: Er, a magical mutation, that is. Whatever it once was is obfuscated but what it's become now.
Rhu: Why does it glow?
Apheori (GM): As in they could form a cult around it, I mean.
Ganelon: obfuscated *by*, rather.
Greibel: Hey man, don't call it a "mutation", man. That's offensive!
HE DIDN'T MEAN IT, WEIRD TREE!
Apheori (GM): Radek: The glow isn't a direct effect of the magic. It
's like there are no direct effects, only side effects?
It's weird.
Radek: It's not purposeful, I can tell you that much.
In fact, I can't even begin to guess what purpose this tree was supposed to have.
Rhu: Weird.
Amadi: It's pretty. Think they sell them?
The Gravedigger: From what we heard in the village, I don't seem to recall it having ANY purpose.
Rhu: We could try to find "Genri Hodgeson's boys" and ask them, I guess. But they were apparently drunk at the time.
The Gravedigger: A prank, I think the innkeep said.
Do we think this tree is relevant to anything?
Rhu shrugs
Rhu: it went all shiny and glowy when we drained the pool yesterday
I think
Greibel: This tree means something! This is important!
Rhu: and there was that weird graffiti that suggested it might "guard" or be a "guard" or whatever
Frezak (GM): You rely on the scribbling of these villagers?
They don't seem to be the most sound people.
Radek: All I can say is that it isn't doing anything it was made to, if it was made to do something at all.
The Gravedigger: You rely on the scribbling of these villagers?
They don't seem to be the most sound people.
Amadi: Excuse me, I don't think I caught your names? Are you scientists, perhaps?
The Gravedigger: Is it currently related to the rift at all?
Radek: I am, among other things.
The others are goons working under my employer.
Greibel: Hey!
Goon /Druid/, thank you very much
Rhu: I think it might be related to the pool, not the rift. Last night when we came back here, the pool and the tree were glowing strongly.
Amadi: Oh, fascinating! You must be researching something very dangerous to need so much muscle.
The Gravedigger: Maybe we should remove the tree?
Or pop it into the rift?
Amadi taps Gravy appreciatively.
Amadi: Very sexy.
The Gravedigger: Maybe ask the villagers which came first.
Thank you, small lady.
Amadi beams.
Frezak (GM): Unless someone knows which came first.
Ganelon: I *think* it was the rift but I don't recall specifically asking.
It would explain why the tree is there and not somewhere else, though.
Frezak (GM): What, that they thought it would be cool to pop it above the rift?
And it's more of a... big warning sign, basically?
Amadi: Warning? For what?
Rhu: The tree came first; "It's been dead as long as anyone remembers. ". The rift only showed up three years ago. Look for "Hodgesons" in the chat logs to get the story.
Frezak (GM): That there's a big hole that shreds things?
I mean the MAGIC tree.
Amadi: Where is nobody?
Frezak (GM): It takes me 15 minutes to load up the backlog >.>
Apheori (GM): Rhu? Did you really say that?
Gaurav: Except for the last sentence about the chat logs, yes.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Rhu: Shreds things, explodes zombies.
We should have checked if the zombie was combustible before it went in.
Amadi: Oh, it's not. Zombies are strictly... not combustible.
It's a zombie thing, I'm sure.
Rhu: The zombie didn't cause the pool to drain out like Azir did. I wonder if that was 'cos it wasn't alive? Or if Azir was just more magical?
The Gravedigger: He looked a bit soggy to burn well.
Rhu: ...
I think I'm going to have a little pray to Hazz'ridan and see if he has any ideas.
Rhu does this.
The Gravedigger: Maybe the pool drains based on something other than what goes into the rift.
Amadi snuggles Rhu.
Rhu: (to Amadi) Shh, praying.
Apheori (GM): Nothing in particular comes of it.
Greibel: Maybe it only drains the first time you throw stuff in it
Frezak (GM): Well, we might as well check out the river, then?
Rhu: I think we should poke around with the pool a bit more. It seems a bit of a waste to come all this way just to dump an exploding zombie into the pool.
Darned if I know how, though.
Radek: We hardly know enough to conduct proper experiments on it. Its nature could have changed since yesterday and we would be clueless.
Greibel: I dispute that. Any chance to explode a zombie is by definition the opposite of a waste.
Amadi: Ahah, so this is the science!
The Gravedigger: We'd need a stack of zombies and drop one in every day to see if results match?
Radek: If that's all you want to do, I *have* prepared a bomb or... five.
The Gravedigger: TO guess what sort of stability it's effects have?
Apheori (GM): its
Radek: Certainly. If we can prove that its effects are reliable, that's progress.
Though I admit to being less than optimistic in that regard.
Rhu: Yes, but I'm not a scientist. I'm an adventurer. We can make with the balanced factorial analyses once we run out of other options; I say we go follow the river and see where that gets us.
Ganelon: Radek has a lot of fun when the discussions turn towards science.
Radek: I agree, on the basis that there are no more zombies in sight.
The Gravedigger: Sounds fair.
Let's go find some water, then.
Rhu: Okay!
Rhu drives us towards the river, and then we follow it.
Rhu: I guess we have enough food in our adventurer's kit? We might be away from the village for a while, this is a long river.
Apheori (GM): To be fair, this car goes really fast.
Gaurav: Yes! I hadn't realized quite how fast it went until today!
Apheori (GM): It has this fancible mechanism that displaces the air around you invisibly, no matter how fast you're going, and only lets in a pleasant breeze.
FUTURE CONVERTIBLES.
Gaurav: :D
Rhu: (to Amadi, as we drive, if we have the time) So: you said you knew Hazz'ridan the Great?
Amadi: Oh, of course. Why do you ask?
Apheori (GM): There's time, and not much to see, unless you like dry safari crap.
You're mostly heading toward the mountains to the southeast, but you can't even see them yet.
Ganelon: I'll just busy myself with this incredibly "wrong" zombie bit.
Apheori (GM): (The drive is probably a couple of hours.)
Ganelon: If I learn something, cool. If not, it's still fascinating.
Rhu: If not, you could blow the whole car up.
Apheori (GM): You learn that it really likes falling apart.
Rhu: (to Amadi) Hazz'ridan spoke to me yesterday. He wants me to close that hole, but he doesn't know how. Him! The Great Hazz'ridan!
Ganelon: Ah well.
Amadi: Oh, don't worry yourself, dear. Even gods can't know everything. I should know.
I don't think I know anything.
Isn't that strange?
Rhu: How would you know? Are you a priest? A scholar?
Amadi: Hah! Not hardly!
I mean... I don't know! Oh, what a mystery this is.
Rhu: Hmm. Indeed.
Rhu goes back to driving
Apheori (GM): Heh.
Gravy: You see a dragon.
Ganelon: LET'S KILL IT.
Apheori (GM): Radek: You find that the cell structure in the zombie flesh is kind of... gone.
The Gravedigger: DRAGON, GUYS.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: Rasputin tries to crawl into your ear.
Frezak (GM): How far?
Apheori (GM): Pretty far off, but in sight. You're also over some of the mountains now.
Rhu: Woah! A dragon!
Frezak (GM): Do we think it's hostile at all?
has it seen us?
Apheori (GM): It hasn't seen you, and it may or may not be hostile.
Radek: Amadi, how do people treat dragons on this planet?
Apheori (GM): It's just sort of soaring around.
Amadi: This planet? Which planet is this?
Frezak (GM): Just... uh... don't steer closer, okay? >.>
Radek: I don't know.
Greibel scratches at his ear
Amadi: Oh! Well, that doesn't sound good.
The porridge falls back onto Greibel's shoulder.
Rhu: I'll keep following the river unless that leads us dragonwards.
Apheori (GM): Naw, dragon's off to the right.
You head over some mountains! They're actually starting to get pretty luch.
lush
Frezak (GM): Nice.
Any mutant animals about?
Amadi: Why don't you know what planet you're on? Is this an expedition?
Radek: No indeed. I'd enjoy knowing where we are nearly as much as I would being somewhere I know.
Amadi: Oh. I'm sorry.
Radek: We arrived under dubious circumstances and the civilization here seems rather... under-developed.
I suspect they haven't even tamed dragons yet.
Amadi: So is there civilisation here, then? I don't feel anything.
Shouldn't I feel something? I feel like I should feel something.
Apheori (GM): No obvious muties, but there are some things that are definitely alien on the rocks.
They might be goats. Or bears.
Frezak (GM): Just foreign, not modified? Hokay.
Apheori (GM): Probably.
Gaurav: I should warn everybody that I need to leave for class in about half an hour.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
So you sail along and ahead you see ocean.
Gaurav: YAY!
Rhu: Woah!
Apheori (GM): And a city. It's kind of biggish.
Gaurav: EVEN BETTER
Apheori (GM): ...And disappointingly short.
Frezak (GM): A short city?
What, like for midgets.
*?
Apheori (GM): The buildings are weirdly short.
Like... not tall!
Frezak (GM): DWARVES
Apheori (GM): Ńote that you're all used to really tall towers.
Basically it's oldfangled.
But they have a lot of light fixtures!
Frezak (GM): I'm used to oldfangled.
That was Gravy's shitck.
Rhu: Shall we go see if anybody's home?
Frezak (GM): *shtick
The Gravedigger: Let's go be friendly.
Greibel resists the urge to sing "You Keep A Knockin But You Can't Come In" again
Rhu drives us to the city
Apheori (GM): Do you drive through the gate or over it?
The Gravedigger: KNOCK KNOCK KNOCKING ON DWARVE'S DOORS
Apheori (GM): There isn't really a wall, but the gate is still the main point of entry.
Frezak (GM): Yeah, lets be polite?
Apheori (GM): There are quite a few people about, some on horses, some with carriages...
Ganelon: Sure, we can pretend that we're normal and go through the gate.
Apheori (GM): Normal.
Rhu: Yes. We should park our car outside and walk in. Anybody see a secure place to leave CAR?
Ganelon: Don't mind us, guys, just a chrome geezer and gigantic demon-man in the back seat of our flying steel wagon.
Gaurav: Gan: hahaha
Frezak (GM): You want me to stay back with CAR and Radek?
Amadi looks around curiously.
Amadi: Is this it, then?
Ganelon: Yeah, if you actually want to give an impression of normality, we could stay behind.
Apheori (GM): There are some trees and rocks and crap you could park behind.
Frezak (GM): We don't know if someone might go and do... things to the car.
Graffity.
Steal.
Break.
Apheori (GM): And an abandoned roofless farmhouse you could park IN.
Frezak (GM): Piss on.
Ganelon: That last one sounds like a pretty great camouflage.
Frezak (GM): Does the CAR have a thief alarm?
Apheori (GM): Considering you already stole it once, probably not.
Gaurav: Heh. I think the abandoned farmhouse is probably fine.
If we get stuck here, we get stuck here.
Frezak (GM): I'm just worried that it might get messed with when we're gone.
Rhu: (to Amadi) what was that you were saying about vanishing carts earlier? You wouldn't happen to have one on you, do you?
Ganelon: I'd trap it, but...
Frezak (GM): MAYBE NO BOMBS.
Ganelon: Well, the best I could do would either explode the entire farmhouse or burn it to the ground.
Frezak (GM): Amadi will prolly give you a piece of cheese or summat.
Ganelon: Alchemist's Fire balanced precariously over a mostly-closed door must be a really popular trick in Alchemist School.
Amadi checks her pockets.
Amadi: I'm afraid I seem to be all out.
Rhu: Thanks for checking, Mrs. Teatime.
Frezak (GM): Eh, let's leave it.
If only Radek knew Magic Mouth.
Rhu: We could try to hide it, particularly if this abandoned farmhouse has any hay.
... but why would it
Amadi: You find it has a ghost sitting in the middle of the floor. You can land on it, or do something else.
Agh, dammit.
Apheori (GM): You find it has a ghost sitting in the middle of the floor. You can land on it, or do something else.
Frezak (GM): Ghost of what?
COW GHOST?
Apheori (GM): Old man.
Frezak (GM): GHOST OF BEEF PAST?
Ganelon: Stand back, guys.
I got this one.
Frezak (GM): OPEN FIRE.
Radek: Hello there, spectral entity!
Rhu: Is it the ghost of the zombie? Because that would be awkward.
Apheori (GM): The ghost looks around trying to find where the voice came from.
You've probably stopped a few feet overhead.
Radek: Above you, my good former-man!
Frezak (GM): Wow.
Radek is... sort of polite.
Ganelon: It's an old man.
Apheori (GM): The ghost looks up and says something, but you hear no words.
Ganelon: His people.
Apheori (GM): He waves and shrugs.
Radek: Hm. That could be a problem.
Rhu: SPEAK UP
Frezak (GM): Hmm.
We must kill Radek.
It's the only way.
Ganelon: I like your way of thinking, sir.
Amadi: (calling down) Why do you say that?
Rhu: (to Amadi) You can hear him?
Amadi: What? Of course!
Can't you?
Frezak (GM): Radek, bend over.
I will see you on the other side.
Apheori (GM): The ghost perks up slightly and says something else.
Ganelon: No you won't, you'll see me back on this side where I don't belong.
Apheori (GM): ...bend over?
Frezak (GM): For decapitation you pervert.
You're just like the Merr.
Apheori (GM): Ooooh, of course.
Frezak (GM): OH GODS THE MERR
Frezak (GM) sobs
Gaurav: ... the Merr?
Apheori (GM): What?
Ganelon: Look at what you've done now, Apheori.
Apheori (GM): Did something happen?
TELL ME.
Ganelon: Reminding him of his lost love.
Apheori (GM): Oh, good idea.
Frezak (GM): She's not my love.
She's some whore.
Apheori (GM): I can totally use this.
Ganelon: She went to Japan and he misses her.
Frezak (GM): SHUT UP YOU.
Amadi: Well whyever not?
Radek: Could you repeat what he's saying, for us?
Amadi: Ah, well, it seems he thinks we should leave. Nobody ever hears him anyway, but he tries to warn them. It's quite peculiar, don't you think?
Radek: Quite. What are these people being warned about?
Arthritis?
Gods know I could have used that one.
Apheori (GM): The ghost says another silent something.
The Gravedigger: Warn them? Of what?
That sounds a bit iffy.
Amadi: Oh, nothing, it seems. He just wants to leave. Stuck here. Everyone thinks its haunted so they stay away. Nobody can hear him, so he just tells them to leave. Easier that wasy.
Like they really are listening.
Apheori (GM): The ghost says something else and sighs.
Amadi: Right?
Radek: I don't suppose you would know anything about exorcism, would you Rhu?
Gaurav: Not exorcisms, no. I could do a religion check.
Amadi: It's not an exorcism he needs.
He says it's...
Gaurav: I can abjure undead, but I don't think that'd be helpful.
Amadi: He needs us to remove the mark on the door.
Greibel: Time-travelling maintenance men. Excellent.
Amadi: Can a mark really do that, keep someone outside?
Frezak (GM): COuld be a Circle of Holding:undead.
Gaurav: Huh!
Amadi jumps down out of the car and goes to the door and tries to rub it off.
Radek: I'll follow suit.
Ganelon: Bah. OOC.
Amadi: That didn't work.
The Gravedigger: WHy don't we just remove the door?
Apheori (GM): Amadi looks back to the ghost, who rolls his eyes and says something.
Amadi: Shiny, can you unmagic this?
Amadi backs away from Gravy.
Radek: It's Radek.
Amadi: Oh! I'm sorry. Good to meet you, Radek.
Greibel pats Radek on the back while walking by
Greibel: Cheer up, shiny!
Gaurav: I like the idea of removing the door.
Radek: Radek J. Fulvius, and the only things I cannot do are those not worth doing. I'm a genius, you know.
Ganelon: Watch me roll a 1.
rolling 1d20+11
(
13
)
+11
=
24
Amadi nods.
Amadi: That must be wonderful for you.
Apheori (GM): You demagicking it?
Frezak (GM): Better than 9!
Ganelon: As requested.
Apheori (GM): Okay, it demagicks.
Ganelon: Yes.
Apheori (GM): The ghost guy looks really blissful and fades away.
Gaurav: That's a lousy one, but a lovely roll.
YAY!
Rhu: Take care, ghost guy.
Greibel salutes vaguely
Amadi: So this is what you people do?
The Gravedigger: Well we could have kept him around to scare people off, but his memory should be enough.
Well, /I/ dig holes.
Amadi: Oh.
Greibel: And I dig drugs!
Amadi: What... kind of holes?
I... that... interesting.
Radek: In truth, I mostly build things.
Tinkering with machines and magic are my twin passions, though in an official capacity we're all here as investigators.
I'm... not sure that has much meaning any more, however.
Amadi: Ooo, the intrigue!
Ganelon: The crazy girl is being a lot more coherent now, huh?
I say that if she starts being crazy again, we take her back to the hole so it can suck all of her madness out again.
Frezak (GM): HAH
The Gravedigger: HOles in the dirt.
To put dead people in.
Gaurav: And: BOOM! It's time for me to run.
Ganelon: Surely this will have no consequences.
Gaurav: Holes, holes, everywhere.
The Gravedigger: No-one else does it where I come from.
It's all fire and pulping.
Amadi: Fascinating.
Frezak (GM): RAAAAVE NOOOOO
Gaurav: :(
Sorry
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Saturday?
Gaurav: but community ecology insists
Ganelon: Works for me.
Gaurav: Saturday!
Bear Soup Guy: Saturday!
Gaurav: BYEEEEEEE
Ganelon: See ya!
Bear Soup Guy: Adios

Session 9

Apheori (GM): So y'all are in a roofless farmhouse or some such. Radek just demagicked a thingy and let a ghost go.
And I am awake.
Frezak (GM): So what are we about to enter this town /for/ ?
(From Ellemerr): Am I present?
Apheori (GM): It's a much bigger thing, a city by the coast, possibly something of a trading hub, though hell if I know if any of you would realise that.
Gaurav: Awakedness is overrated.
After two days of hanging out in a village, *any* city would seem pretty big and impressive to us I think.
Apheori (GM): This would be a place to go to try to get more information - from folks such as wizards, priests, or madmen on the streets, or possibly even more. There may be more.
Gaurav: Did we land CAR? Or is it still hovering in mid-air about the ghost?
Apheori (GM): Car is landed in the house.
The ghost is gone. Radek let it go.
Gaurav: The recently re-departed.
Apheori (GM): The others may still be sitting in the car, but Radek and Amadi are by the door.
To the house.
On the ground.
Gaurav: Frezak: I think we just got tired of the village and the tree mostly :P But also we're hoping to (1) get off of this planet, (2) figure out what this planet is named, (3) report our Sarathi findings to HQ and find out what the latest is, (4) figure out what time and place we've arrived at and if the Sarathi quest even makes sense any more
(To Ellemerr): Amadi doesn't remember who anyone is and is basically acting bemused and interested, like everything is curious and new. She has also been flirting with the others for some reason. You can continue that or not if you'd like.
Gaurav: DM: ah! for some reason, I thought both had leaped from a flying car in their quest for ghostly justice. I like your version better. Fewer broken bones.
Ganelon: I would never do something as reckless as rely on my ability to survive a fall.
Of any significant distance.
Apheori (GM): Anything more than, oh, 15cm?
Rhu turns off CAR, locks it, takes the keys out of the ignition &c.
Apheori (GM): I just found an octopus beak in my sandwich.
Ganelon: Anything greater than the length from my feet to my knees, more like.
Rhu: DM: make a wish!
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Gaurav: Gan: phew. I was a little worried that the first large step we discovered might knock you out of commission.
Apheori (GM): >.>
(From Ellemerr): I like that she forgets who people are. Because I do too.
Apheori (GM): Heheh, indeed.
Ghah, wrong window.
(To Ellemerr): Er, that was to you.
Ellemerr: It happens.
Frezak (GM): Sooooo.
(From Ellemerr): For me? Really? I shall cherish it forever.
Frezak (GM): Off to town we go?
Apheori (GM): Off! I hope.
Rhu: Yes. Civilization! Paved streets! Internet access! I can't wait.
Frezak (GM): Let's go be friendly.
Ganelon: Internet access. Pff, sure.
Apheori (GM): It's about a five minute walk to the road, and from there not much further to the city. A guy passes you all on a horse on the way in, but he's in too much of a hurry to acknowledge you.
Two guards stand by the gate and give you strange looks, but don't say or do anything else.
Rhu mutters "egotistical city person, thinks he's too good for everybody ..."
Frezak (GM): Someone eloquent and non-monstrous should ask them what the town is called >.>
Apheori (GM): Like Amadi?
Gaurav: Do they not react to Gravy?
Ganelon: Look at our party and tell me if that's an even slightly reasonable expectation to have.
Apheori (GM): They give him weird looks.
Frezak (GM): Rave: would YOU fuck with Gravy?
Ellemerr: You could ask Amadi to ask, but I do not promise you any eloquence.
Frezak (GM): "Hey, you, giant horned muscly guy. Don't.... uh... nevermind."
Rhu is the most normal person here.
Comparatively.
Apheori (GM): XD
Frezak (GM): Since it's not obvious he talks to people that aren't there.
Gaurav: The villagers seemed to not know what he was; Im wondering if the city has had horned visitors before/regulaly
Rhu: (to guards) Hello! Do you know where we are?
Frezak (GM): Town guards better know where and what their city is >.>
Apheori (GM): From their reactions, it appears they don't normally see quite this, but they're also not entirely put off by it...
Guard: No! I have no idea!
Amadi mutters to herself, "I know where we are."
Guard backs away slightly.
Guard looks at his companion suspiciously.
Rhu: Ah, well. Same here, I suppose. Is there a good inn in town?
Apheori (GM): Hmm, maybe I should differentiate between the guards.
Ellemerr: Guard and Guard companion? xD
Gaurav: Casimir and Pulaski
Other guard rolls his eyes and says, "Yeah, there's a few."
Frezak (GM): Hebert and Hebret.
Other guard: This is Coffle, by the way.
Seat of Deslan.
Which I'm sure you've never heard of.
Frezak (GM): GUYS
GUYS GUYS GUYS
LOOK FOR A LAMP-POST
Guard: Ugh, more?
Frezak (GM): I WANT SOME TURKISH DELIGHT
Apheori (GM): What.
Rhu: Pleased to meet you, Seat of Deslan. My name is Rhu, and I am a servant of Hazz'ridan the Magnificent. My companions and I are from normal places via Sarathi, which is full of holes.
Ellemerr: I want summer, not winter. And pizza.
Radek: Well, I'm sure you've never heard of electrical power, so perhaps we can both be disappointed.
Amadi chimes in, "I'm not from there. I'm from elsewhere."
Apheori (GM): There are lamp posts! The lamps appear to be somewhat advanced - either magical or electrical.
Guard groans and leaves.
Ganelon: Huh.
Well they don't have flying cars.
Rhu watches the guard walk away
Other guard: Coffle is the seat of the country. Deslan is the country
Ignore him. He's tired of visitors... like you.
Rhu: Oh! My apologies.
Why so? Have there been a lot of visitors lately?
Greibel: Why does a country need to sit down?
Other guard: Not so many. Just enough to try the nerves with these questions.
The Gravedigger mutters. "Hrmph. Visitors have a choice."
Other guard: Each time, always the same. 'How do I get home?' 'Where is this?' 'Do you have a gate?' 'Excuse me, but where'ś the terminal?'
Amadi: Questions are important. You shouldn't... should... Questions. Ask questions.
Radek: Oh? Interesting.
Amadi: What time is it?!
Other guard: We actually did have a gate, you know. Went down shortly before you lot started coming in. Fancy that.
Amadi fidgets.
Rhu: When did "we lot" start coming in?
And, err
Other guard: 20 to seven, my lady.
Amadi: Oh.
Rhu: where _is_ the terminal? Do you have a satellite uplink around these parts?
Gaurav: Amadi: time to get a new watch
Amadi turns from the guard, sullenly.
The Gravedigger: They don't have one.
Wrong world.
Apheori (GM): Did I ever say when the cataclysm was?
It was around then. 3 years?
I dunno.
The Gravedigger: We're at the other end of the cosmic drain.
Radek: Does that mean you've never encountered outsiders who seemed... less than educated?
Other guard: Woah, slow down, will you?
This was about three years ago, and if I even KNEW what a terminal was...
Satellite, now there's a new one.
Gaurav: DM: yup, three years! Although I've just realized we don't know what a "year" is on this planet. I wouldn't expect these hicks to use standard galactic time.
Other guard: 'Less than educated'? You could work for the council.
It's like some had lost their minds, others never even had them...
Radek: Not surprising.
Other guard: Why, we got a guy just last week who seemed convinced he was a dog. Mighty hairy, too.
Maybe he was a dog!
Rhu: Any cats?
Amadi mutters to herself, "Tastes like burning. Minds wandering off, answers without questions... There's the taste. Burnt. Cut off the tongue."
Other guard: My lady, are you quite okay?
Amadi turns her head to the guard, asks dryly, "Are you?" and turns back.
Radek: Would you say that you've never seen someone like us who was impressed by whatever passes for high technology in this, er... "city"?
Other guard: Hah.
High technology? And what might that be?
(To Rhu): Mind the present. There's something here.
Frezak (GM): I want to ask them about Ambaric power :P
Radek: How should I know what you consider advanced? I arrived here yesterday.
(To Rhu): (if that even worked. Can gods whisper?)
Other guard: And I'm a guard, not a technologist.
They pay me to look pretty and drink.
Rhu looks around
Rhu: Who said that?
Radek sighs. "Do they all ask about 'terminals' and 'computers'?"
(To Rhu): You know. You have always known.
Other guard: Some.
Radek: And the others?
Rhu looks astonished, and his eye go wide
Other guard: Quite a few on about 'proxies' and 'avatars', too.
Amadi: (to Rhu) Voice. Did you ask a question?
Rhu: What? Sorry? No. Yes. Hang on.
Other guard: Usually it's just home or passages.
Rhu: I think I just heard Hazz'ridan's voice inside my head.
He said "Mind the present. There's something here."
Rhu looks at Othor Guard again
Rhu: He must mean you
(To Amadi): Mortals... useless, the lot of them.
Amadi: I can hang. Swing. Ropes and ladders and air and dancing.
Amadi giggles.
Amadi: But they're fun!
Rhu: Tell us more about yourself, Sir ... ? Are you a native of this town?
Amadi: Wouldn't be half so fun if they knew everything. Questions are... answers. Important.
(To Amadi): Try not to have too much fun with these, dear sister.
(From Ellemerr): Did Ama use another name for Hazz, or is my memory screwed again=
(To Ellemerr): Called him Hazz, but she might call him all sorts of things. Folks here call him Vitoi, elsewhere he's... other things...
Ellemerr: It's not my fault! I... was dreaming... Now I'm here.
Amadi: It's not my fault! I... was dreaming... Now I'm here.
Rhu does a perception check of the area to see if we've missed something apart from the gate and the guard.
Other guard: No, I'm a native of the moon.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+12
(
13
)
+12
=
25
Other guard looks at Rhu suspiciously.
(From Ellemerr): 'Twas Vitoi I was thinking of. Thanks.
Rhu: (not really paying attention, since he's distracted by his search) Mmhmm, is that right? Which moon would that be?
Apheori (GM): You've missed mostly just the rest of the city/town. Some folks are watching, others doing... city folk things. there's a guy with a pigeon on his head standing in the middle of he road further down.
Other guard: Brains, you heard of them?
Greibel: Ouch. Burn!
Rhu keeps looking around, although every once in a while his eyes drift back to the pigeon man.
The Gravedigger: Excuse him.
He's a little insane and people can live on moons where we come from.
Is there anyone that can tell us about the Cataclysm?
Scholars or magisters?
Rhu: Ah, yes. What? Sorry? Oh. Not right now, please. Yes, you're clearly not who Hazz'ridan is talking about. Thank you all the same.
Amadi: Shouldn't live on moons. Bad dreams.
Other guard looks up at Gravy, startles slightly, and then nods gratefully.
Other guard: You can try the temples, or the College. Philosophers might know more, but they're generally pretty... well...
Other guard looks at the guy with the pigeon on his head.
Other guard: Loony?
Amadi: Asking questions. Always. Nothing good can come of it. Knowledge is bad for you.
Other guard: There's also Nadrine - a newcomer like yourselves, who speaks of wayfarers and rarely makes much sense.
But she's still alive, if you want to give her a try.
The Gravedigger: Thanks.
Frezak (GM): College, philosphers or yet another crazy lady?
Rhu: (to Amadi, not taking his eyes off pigeon man) Knowledge is good for you. An unknown path is just a road. You can't discover the dead end until you know the whole road.
(To Amadi): God addled.
Gaurav: I am a fan of crazy ladies, but I understand I might be in a minority here.
Other guard nods and turns to yell at the guy with the pigeon on his head, who runs off.
Ellemerr: You're not. Trust me on this one.
I'm less certain of the characters, though.
Amadi shakes her head sadly at Rhu.
Radek: We have a diverse selection of madmen at our disposal. Of what consequence is another to add to our collection?
Amadi: You don't know. Be glad.
Apheori (GM): A pigeon lands on Greibel's head.
Rhu shouts at the fleeing pigeon man: "WAIT!"
Greibel looks up cautiously
Greibel: PIGEON HEAD! YEAH!
The pigeon leans foward.
The pigeon pecks at the porridge.
Greibel strokes its beak
Greibel: Hey now, you guys play nice.
Radek: You're not turning me off knowledge, girl.
Just the company of lunatics.
The porridge opens up and eats the pigeon.
Greibel: Hmmm....
Hungry little fella
Frezak (GM): NO surprise there.
Amadi gives the porridge a smile. "Tastes like burning."
Pigeon philosopher runs into an alley.
Rhu: I think we should go after that guy!
The Gravedigger shrugs.
The Gravedigger: Then you better get running.
The porridge beams at Amadi without eyes.
Rhu: Okay. Don't leave without me!
Rhu takes off after the pigeon guy
Apheori (GM): Rhu follows the guy into an alley and finds that he's cornered.
The guy, that is.
Gaurav: yay! so often it is the other way around.
Apheori (GM): He's standing at the end staring at a dead end.
Ganelon: Aw, and we were so close to him getting ambushed by thugs.
Gaurav: WOAH
Apheori (GM): More pigeons are landing around him.
Rhu: ... excuse me?
Apheori (GM): It's a bit dark because the buildings are pretty close together.
Rhu: Sir?
Apheori (GM): The guy doesn't respond. Then a pigeon lands on Rhu's head as well.
Pigeon philosopher screams, "HEAD PIGEONS!" and starts trying to claw through the wall.
Amadi frowns, and nods to Greibel and the bit of food on his shoulder. "Your friend has the gist of it, you know."
Rhu: Excuse me. I ... I think you might be important to my ques-- hey!
GUYS! A LITTLE HELP HERE!
Rhu tries to restrain pigeon guy
Guard pushes past Rhu and grabs the guy, pulling him away from the wall.
Guard: Again, Freidel? Really?
You know the mushrooms aren't good for you...
Rhu: Hey! Be gentle! He's ... important!
Guard: Sure, sure, he is. He's also due for a nice lie in the dungeons to sleep it all off.
Guard pulls the guy past Rhu.
The porridge jiggles.
Rhu: Where are the dungeons?
What's his name?
Who are you?
Guard ignores Rhu and heads off, half pulling, half-dragging the guy.
Pigeon philosopher mumbles about pidgeons and holes and the nature of spinach.
Greibel: Pigeon head guy!
Shame, we had so much in common
Pigeon philosopher: Waffle head moose!
Rhu: Holes! He said holes! Something about holes!
Pigeon philosopher waves at Greibel.
Greibel smiles
Pigeon philosopher: Ooooo, that sky. What a sky. What a...
Rhu follows the guard/pigeon guy combo to the end of the street and sees which direction they head off in.
Apheori (GM): At this point you could follow the guard/stoned guy or ignore them.
Amadi yawns.
Frezak (GM): I doubt he's going anywhere.
College?
We might someone that doesn't talk to people who aren't there or rant about spinach for no reason.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You now know where the guardhouse is (dungeon in the basement).
Rhu: I think we should follow the guy! I think he's important!
The porridge gurgles.
Amadi: He had head-pigeons. If I gave advices I'd... flowers? Why isn't this a dream?
Frezak (GM): So we're gonna follow voices in your head?
The Gravedigger: So we're gonna follow voices in your head?
Eh, whatever.
Let's go talk to the guy with pigeon-poop hair, then.
Frezak (GM): To the dungeons?
Rhu: To the dungeons!
Greibel: Espionage!
Radek: Surely this will be productive!
Radek grumbles.
Gaurav: To be fair, it probably makes more sense to wait and see if pigeon guy is a little saner later and head to hte college first. But Rhu has no impulse control.
Apheori (GM): Aiight, y'all head that way. Hawkers try to hawk random baubles and food and crap at you, a woman bumps into Radek and then hastily moves away with a quick 'excuse me!', and there are no cats.
Amadi frowns, watches the others going, turns to start in the other direction... And then comes along after all.
Frezak (GM): WAIT.
Preception on the lady that bumped into Radek.
Because thieves.
Activating Eagle Eyes.
rolling 1D20+20
(
19
)
+20
=
39
Ganelon: What's she going to steal, my chrome?
Frezak (GM): YOUR AMGIC SHIZZLE
Apheori (GM): Frezak: She put something in his bag.
Frezak (GM): *magic stuffs.
Ganelon: Actually I'm not even sure how I store crap.
Apheori (GM): It got a bunch of silver coated on it, though.
Ganelon: I have a bag, sure, but is it also chrome?
Apheori (GM): Yup.
Gaurav: Your precious bodily fluids.
Frezak (GM): Gonna grab the woman.
RAIN WATER AND GRAIN ALCOHOL.
rolling 1D20+5
(
12
)
+5
=
17
Greibel begins haggling with a merchant for a weird used hat to put on the porridge
Apheori (GM): You grab the woman. She tries to twist away, then punches Gravy in the eye.
For basically no damage, but she's clearly annoyed.
The Gravedigger: Do that again and I'm gonna put this shovel to use.
Explain yourself.
The woman: What in the hells do you want?! Are you trying to get yourselves killed? Release me!
Radek: What's wrong?
The Gravedigger: She put something in your bag.
Check your stuff.
The woman: I did nothing! You clearly are ahead of yourself.
Ganelon: Sure, I'll check my stuff.
The woman: Now if you do not put me down...
Apheori (GM): It's a small package wrapped in paper.
And chrome.
But mostly paper.
You also realise the chrome is getting... thinner.
On you, and on it.
Amadi strolls slowly up to Gravy and the lady and proclaims with a wistful smile that "I think I'm ahead of myself... but I'll probably catch up someday."
Apheori (GM): Greibel: What do you even have to haggle with? Supposing this could get interesting...
The woman: What?
Bear Soup Guy: I have....herbs?
The woman stops struggling and stares at Amadi.
The woman: You...
No, this is impossible.
Bear Soup Guy: Rare nature herbs!
Apheori (GM): RAHB: He wants a hallucinogenic but doesn't want to call it that.
Bear Soup Guy: Are my rare herbs hallucinogenic?
Amadi narrows here eyes on the woman, staring long and hard. Finally she says, with utter certainty, "Apple pie."
Frezak (GM): WATCH YOUR LANGUAGE YOUNG LADY.
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Ganelon: So what's in the package?
Also, damn. I'm running out of chrome and I have no idea how to get it back.
Other than walking through walls.
Apheori (GM): RAHB: Probably. He certainly seems to think so, though he won't say it, instead insisting on various euphamism...
s
The woman looks at Amadi for a long moment, and then said, finally, "Oh."
Greibel plays along with the various euphemisms
Greibel: You can definitely uh...become enriched and...enlightened by these, uh....materials. Man.
Amadi suddenly breaks out in uncontrollable giggles.
Apheori (GM): The guy becomes more insistent that these are not so extraordinary, and that there is utterly nothing wrong with wanting them.
Gaurav: Griebel: hehe. If the guy is being secretive about it, it might be illegal around these parts, keep an eye out for guards!
Bear Soup Guy: Probably but they seem to be having their fill with crazy people :)
Greibel: Yes, this is a transaction that may mutually benefit us.
Gaurav: BSG: fair point
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You finally manage to make the transaction after the man finally turns bright red with embarrassment, and hastily waves for you to go away, this never happened, shoo.
Bear Soup Guy: HAT GET
Greibel walks away, putting the hat lovingly atop Rasputin's non-head
Apheori (GM): Gravy and Greibel: You notice there's a woman with her hands on her hips staring at Greibel's... well, the guy he was dealing with... disappointedly.
Frezak (GM): I doubt that;
I'm still looking at the woman i'm grabbing.
Greibel: Hmmm
Frezak (GM): While I wait to see what Radek found.
Apheori (GM): You've got mad perception. You may not have noticed the context, but you saw here.
Bear Soup Guy: Well then
Ganelon: Yes, this is a thing I must be told.
Apheori (GM): Whereas Greibel saw here but may nto put it togethere.
Bear Soup Guy: Ah
Apheori (GM): Did you open the package?
Oh, that was what you found in your stuff.
I could have been clearer on that.
A small paper-wrapped package.
Oh, you did open it.
Sorry, too much stuff.
Apheori (GM): It contains... a rock.
Ganelon: No worries.
...An ordinary rock?
Apheori (GM): A round black one. Like a river rock. It has something carved into it.
(From Amadi): So... do I actually have any idea why the woman reacted to me? xD
Ganelon: A magic rune, perhaps?
I mean, it's either that or the image of a rubber duckling. Those are my guesses.
(To Amadi): At this point I don't even know why. Or what the rock is or what she wasdoing or anything. I mean, she probably recognised you as Eapherod, but... how or why, I have no idea.
Rhu looks at the rune to see if he can make any religious sense of it
Apheori (GM): Could be magic. Looks more like a symbol for something.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+8 religion check
(
11
)
+8
=
19
Apheori (GM): A stylised mask? Doesn't mean anything to you, though.
Radek: What's the meaning of this?
Ganelon: To the woman who put it there, of course.
The woman: It's a rock. Let me go!
Frezak (GM): I'll just lift her.
Legs dangling in the air.
And say nothing.
Apheori (GM): Some other folks have noticed this as well. But they're staying out of it. So far.
Radek: It's a rock you wrapped in paper and put in my bag.
Amadi stops giggling just long enough to look at the image, then breaks into even harder laughter.
Apheori (GM): The woman says nothing as well and just glares at Gravy.
Frezak (GM): Does anyone have a good intimidate?
Ganelon: I think we're all pretty thoroughly unlikable people.
At least as far as the stats are concerned.
Gaurav: +0. I couldn't scare a toad.
Ganelon: If the stats reflected things more accurately, Radek's charisma would not be as high as 10.
Frezak (GM): If I use Str for intimidate I'm still only +5.
Ganelon: Weird, considering who you are.
The Gravedigger: Listen.
I'm tired of all the crazy. my guys are either on drugs, talking to voices in their head, or talking gibberish.
So if I don't have some clear answers for once I'm gonna take it out on you.
The woman: That's great. Really.
But I don't have them.
Radek: Just because you're an uneducated rube doesn't mean I'm talking gibberish!
The Gravedigger: Shut it, Radek.
So you don't know why you put this.. whatever it is in his bag?
It just seemed like a good idea or a slug was controlling your mind?
The woman: If you would put me down, perhaps we can talk.
Or, if you would simply learn how to read...
Apheori (GM): Radek: The paper appears to have been a note, but it got wrecked.
The Gravedigger: You're clearly fully able to talk up here.
Start now or see what happens when I run out of patience.
The woman: You mean like you getting arrested, for one?
Ganelon: Wrecked to the point that it's impossible to read?
Frezak (GM): I'm gonna start walking out of town, still holding the woman up there.
Apheori (GM): A pair of guards have been watching, it seems, but given that all Gravy has done so far is pick the woman up, they haven't really done anything...
But now they start moving, drawing... sticks, apparently, from their holsters...
Frezak (GM): Sticks?
Apheori (GM): The note is illegible, yeah. The chrome wrecked it.
Rods.
Frezak (GM): Do they look like whacking rods or magic focus rods?
Apheori (GM): Probably magic.
A bit short for whacking, though it'd work.
Radek: This is absolutely illegible.
The Gravedigger: Don't mind me. Just doing your job for you.
Frezak (GM): That was directed at them.
The woman: Will you just put me down?
Apheori (GM): The guards hesitate slightly.
The Gravedigger: Nope, not interested anymore.
Frezak (GM): Gonna keep walking.
Dammit, I thought giant horned guys were scary.
Rhu: Maybe we should take this to a bar or somewhere. Somewhere less quiet but less threatening.
Apheori (GM): This is probably why they're only following at this point...
Rhu: May .. be .. the dungeons? There's a man I want to see about a pigeon.
The Gravedigger: I'm gonna need open space for this.
A nice big open patch of dirt...
Apheori (GM): Okay, how do you do an encounter in a street full of people?
Well, not encounter.
Battle-thing.
Fight. Blasting.
Lasers!
Ganelon: That's what 4E calls an encounter.
Apheori (GM): Oh.
Okay.
Frezak (GM): Make a street.
Just.. draw some lines.
Ganelon: And you just... do it. People roll initiative, there are enemies. If there are obstacles, you'll want to draw them on the map layer.
I recommend using the "Draw Shape" tool since it makes nice boxes. Or circles.
Also, holding shift snaps them to the grid.
Ellemerr: Amadi has lay down on the street, laughing. She calms slowly, still shaking a little. And then she disappears.
And I'll brb.
Frezak (GM): HAH
Ganelon: Those boxes are not grid-aligned, but they are boxes.
You can also use the polygon/line tool to make... still-straight but non-box shapes.
Right click "finishes" the line.
Ctrl-z lets you undo steps in one.
If there are no meaningful obstacles, none of this is necessary.
Apheori (GM): Blargh.
Ganelon: Though this map size would make for a really big street.
Pfft, this is nothing. You should see all the nonsense I've drawn for my campaign.
Frezak has his pretty pictures while I just have lines.
Apheori (GM): I'm just too tired to sort it out.
Meh, nevermind.
Bear Soup Guy: IS IT TIME TO FIGHT GUARDS
Apheori (GM): Almost.
Bear Soup Guy: :D
Apheori (GM): They raise their weapons and point them at Radek.
Frezak (GM): What?
That doesn't make any sense >.>
Apheori (GM): You have a hostage.
Guard: Stop now.
Apheori (GM): Now they have one too.
Maybe.
Gaurav: Some hostage.
Ganelon: Ooh, big mistake. Nobody likes Radek.
The Gravedigger: Sure.
As soon as the lady says why she was messing with his stuff.
Frezak (GM): Yeah.
The woman: Oh, for the light, will you all stop this!
Frezak (GM): The guards have just hired Greibel :p
Radek: What are those, wands?
Apheori (GM): Hired?
The woman: (to the guards) Put those away!
In the name of the Council of Ancients, I command you to stand down!
Apheori (GM): The guards hastily put their rods away.
Frezak (GM): Oh, great.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+3 history check to see if I know what a "Council of Ancients" is
(
3
)
+3
=
6
Bear Soup Guy: Rhu can't remember breakfast
Apheori (GM): Rhu: It makes you think of butter for some reason.
Frezak (GM): IT WAS PORRIDGE
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Ganelon: "What did we have for breakfast?"
"Nutrients."
Rhu: What is a breakfast?
The woman: (to Gravy) I was delivering a message. A warning. I don't know what it is and I don't know why, butthat is what it is.
Now.
Put me down.
Frezak (GM): Long, drawn out sigh.
And I'll put her down.
Apheori (GM): Do you also let go?
Frezak (GM): yeah
Apheori (GM): She vanishes as soon as you do.
Ganelon: And on the first of February, 2014, Frezak experienced the joys of a healthy grab-based playstyle, if only for a few minutes.
Apheori (GM): The guards make warding gestures when this happens.
Ganelon: Except not really.
Rhu: (to guards, pointing at the space hitherto occupied by the woman) Does she do that often?
Ganelon: I assume you mean like, religious "lord protect me" warding gestures?
Apheori (GM): Looks like.
Ganelon: I'll approach a guard.
Guard: She was a mystic! They... do as they do.
Apheori (GM): There's a hole in my ankle.
A guard watches Radek.
Ganelon: That sounds like a terrible place for a hole to me.
Be*
Radek points at the guard's rod.
Radek: That's a weapon, right?
Who made it?
Guard: Rorik.
Or his sons.
Radek: Magical in nature?
Guard: Standard two-length quickshot.
Shoot magic. Does that make it magic?
Look, I'm sorry, okay?
It's your friend you should worry about.
Radek: No, no, I don't even care about that. Tell me where I can find this Rorik.
Apheori (GM): A pigeon lands on Radek's head.
Guard: Down Enth Street. There's a really big sign.
Ganelon: I'll grab at it, try to throw it off.
Guard: Between that and the odd explosions, you can't miss it.
Apheori (GM): The pigeon falls off on its own and hits the ground, ded.
dead
Rhu: Huh.
Don't touch it, it might be sick.
Radek: Blasted vermin.
The woman appears again out of nowhere, hands Rhu a package instead, and disappears again, muttering to herself irritatedly.
Rhu: Thank you.
Rhu looks down at package.
Bear Soup Guy picks up the dead pigeon to feed it to Rasputin
Bear Soup Guy: errr
Apheori (GM): It's another letter-wrapped rock.
Greibel: does that
Greibel does that
Bear Soup Guy: I KNOW HOW TO THINGS
Rhu unwraps it careful, in case that helps the paper not to get crumpled.
The porridge eats most of the pigeon except for the feet, which it breaks off with a crunch and spits on the ground.
Apheori (GM): This rock has a slightly different symbol on it - some sort of bird, and an extra little note stuck to it that says 'extra, not sure what this goes to'.
Rhu shows it to everybody, then puts it away.
Apheori (GM): The larger note/letter thing appears to be a set of instructions, saying to be careful, don't stand out, don't get noticed, go to a place, and some bad poetry.
Frezak (GM): I DEMAND TO HEAR THE POETRY
Bear Soup Guy: ^
Gaurav: Any information on hwat sort of place we should go to?
Apheori (GM): Oh dear.
It's a street address. Apparently in the city.
Rhu: Oooooh.
Apheori (GM): http://wiki.zaori.org/compendium/Repeats_of_the_world
That.
That's at the bottom of the note.
Rhu: I still think we should head to the dungeons first.
Apheori (GM): It may not even be poetry.
The shoulders in the sand on the repeats of the world...
There's a blisters of something memory...
Look at the characters whip thy bum...
Kumquats devouring mundial smiley-faces.
Frezak (GM): Sure, let's go to the dungeons.
Greibel is enraptured by the poetry and ponders at its layers of significance
Gaurav: We should totally go to this mysterious address first! Rhu has an awful taste in places to go.
Apheori (GM): Y'all head to the dungeons!
Also you notice Amadi is gone. Do you care?
Ganelon: Radek would probably rather just talk to someone who can make magic tools.
Well, she comes and goes.
He still follows these clowns, though.
Apheori (GM): Quite.
Ellemerr: I am back. Amadi is not. Maybe she will be.
Gaurav: Rhu totally hasn't noticed yet. It's been an exciting few minutes! DId we ever figure out what happend with htat woman who was checking Griebel out?
Apheori (GM): You head into the building and there's a bunch of guards at a table. A couple glare, another smiles amiably, and the one from before sighs and asks if you're hear about the pigeon philosopher.
here
Gaurav: Nothing with that woman, no.
Rhu: Yes! Him. The guy with the ... *makes a pigeon-on-head gesture*
Guard: Down there. Just... don't let him out. Or anyone else. Or do anything stupid.
Please.
I don't want to get up.
Radek: I refuse to be held accountable if any of these three do something stupid.
Rhu: I fully understand.
Guard snorts.
Apheori (GM): A couple of the others now look slightly concerned.
Rhu walks down corridors pigeon-philosopher-wards
Ganelon: Radek isn't too concerned about Gravy doing stupid things, but it's best to cover all the bases.
Apheori (GM): The guy is passed out face-down in a cell.
The door isn't even locked, just shut.
Rhu: Hullo? Mister? Pigeon-guy?
Apheori (GM): He's passed out.
Gaurav: HULLO?
oops
Rhu: HULLO?
Apheori (GM): He's still passed out.
Rhu: ... maybe we should go check out that mysterious address until he wakes up. Now that we know where he is.
Frezak (GM): Sure.
Radek: What exactly makes you believe his insight is valuable?
Rhu: Hazz'ridan spoke to me earlier and said that there was something important around somewhere. I think it might be him. I'm not sure.
Also: pigeons. I wonder if he's a druid; if so, he might know something about the little tree on the big tree above the rift, which might tell us something about the rift.
Radek: ...This is why I don't deal with druids and priests.
Ganelon: Visions and pigeons.
Rhu: Look at this man in this cage, and tell me that Hazz'ridan has not lead us to a glorious dead end.
The Gravedigger sighs.
Greibel: Well...no arguments there.
Gaurav: So: to the mysterious address?
Ganelon: Yeah.
Apheori (GM): I think I need a nap. Or a break or something. I'm too tired to continue properly. >.<
Ganelon: Alright.
Gaurav: I'm okay with coming back later today or taking a break to Tuesday. I'm probably just headed to my lab to work next.
(From Amadi): The dream is of the moon. Or a moon, anyhow. Or something that would look like a moon at a distance - a crescent moon, to be exact. Some lady is sitting on it, dangling her feet over a black pond that is full of stars (unless they're not stars). She's dressed in a white fur. She speaks in a language I do not understand, or perhaps she's just making up nonsense words, since there's no language I don't know. Black birds with eyes in their talons circle around us, making me aware that I'm actually present. I'm standing on the lake. I must be, since there's nothing else. I feel naked, with the stars watching me from below, and small, very small. "I chose this," I tell the lady on the moon. She looks at me with pink eyes and answers with her gibberish words. Frustrated, I repeat myself: "I chose this!" One of the birds land on her head, crushing the eyes against her skull, spilling vitreous humour into her hair. I flinch away as another one comes for my own head.
(From Ellemerr): *shifty eyes* And I keep forgetting Frezak gets these as well.
(To Ellemerr): Oh dear.
Bear Soup Guy: I probably can't be back today if I go and start doing stuff
But works for me
(From Ellemerr): I was in a mood. Sorry. xD
Bear Soup Guy: I committed to way too much stuff today >_<
(To Ellemerr): No need to be sorry.
Gaurav: BSG: What are you up to?
Ellemerr: I might be going to bed at any moment.
Bear Soup Guy: Grocery shopping, then working on a computer and a streaming device, doing music, other odds and ends
Ellemerr: And for more than a nap.
(From Ellemerr): I might be making it longer. I have no idea what I'm doing with it, but it doesn't feel even half-finished. If you want to put things in it, you're welcome, naturally. :3
Apheori (GM): I'm too tired.
Ellemerr: Dream, dearest.
Bear Soup Guy: drea-ee-ee-ee-eem
Apheori (GM): When next? Tuesday? Do we need to discontinue the saturdays and move to tuesdays? Or possibly fridays. I have no idea.
The world is a nice blob of fuzz.
Gaurav: mm, fuzz
Fridays are trickier for me. Saturdays are perfect, Tuesday are fine apart from the whole running-away-when-class-starts thing
Frezak (GM): I'm gonna have to claim busyness on saturdays from now on >.>
Ellemerr: I'm getting my mother over next weekend and can't do anything. You are always free to continue without me. Tuesdays depend muchly on the "when", since I work, but I'm assuming it's later than that.
Saturdays I'm supposed to be busy with Frezak, when I'm not having mums and suchs over. :3
Sundays likewise.
Fridays are good. I think.
Gaurav: Ellemerr: Tuesdays is 1800 UTC I think, if that's after work?
Bear Soup Guy: Tuesdays work good for me
Most Fridays too I guess
Ellemerr: What does UTC mean? >.< Can Gan or Frezak translate for me (since they know my time and maths and stuff)?
Gaurav: UTC = GMT I think
Ellemerr: Oh
O_o
Why are there two names?!
Apheori (GM): DST
Gaurav: the french
or atomic clocks
one or the other
Bear Soup Guy: atomic French
Gaurav: french clocks
with little berets
Bear Soup Guy: ^_^
Apheori (GM): Cows.
Gaurav: Okay. So see you all at 1800 GMT/UTC/whatevers or 1pm ET or 11am MT or 10am PT on Tuesday then?
Bear Soup Guy: All of those!
Gaurav: each and every one :) all the best with your busy day, BSG!
Bear Soup Guy: Thanks, adios all : )
Ellemerr: Be well and eat pancakes.
Gaurav: I will try. Bye, everybody! Sleep well, DM!
Apheori (GM): Woof.
I'll probably just sit here zoning out and spouting nonsense on IRC.
Blargh.
Ellemerr: Silly girl.
Apheori (GM): Than kyou.
Ellemerr: You're very welcome, m'dear. ^___^

Session 10

Apheori (GM): Guys.
Ganelon: I'm here.
Bear Soup Guy: hi
Gaurav: hullo!
Apheori (GM): So to recap, y'all are standing in a dungeon, outside an unlocked cell containing a stoned philosopher sleeping off the mushrooms.
You hare recently received a pair of rocks for some reason, and a message saying to go to an address, probably in the city.
There also seems to be a weapons shop of certain appeal to Radek in town.
What do you all do?
Rhu hopefully shouts at the stoned philosopher again.
Frezak (GM): Roll my eyes.
over and over.
Ganelon: Hook Gravy's eyes up to a turbine.
The pigeon guy stirs, sits up slightly, and hits his head on the bedframe.
The pigeon guy collapses.
Frezak (GM): And he has huge eyeballs, too.
Apheori (GM): The pigeon guybeing the philosopher.
Snrk.
Is there a roll to properly wake someone?
Ganelon: Not really. You've gotta get creative.
Apheori (GM): I suppose it'd never occur to Rhu to just shake the guy...
Frezak (GM): I don't believe that there are vanilla rules for it.
Apheori (GM): Silly vanilla.
Ganelon: Like rolling strength to slap.
Gaurav: We're standing outside the cell, I thought?
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Bear Soup Guy: He's in a cage tough
err yeah, cell
Rhu: But the door is open.
Apheori (GM): It's closed, but not locked. But you'd have to try it to tell the difference.
Rhu walks into the cell and shakes the pigeon guy awake.
Frezak (GM): In a cage over a a pit of larvae.
Rhu: HULLO EXCUSE ME BUT ARE YOU IMPORTANT
Apheori (GM): Rhu: Don't make me get Hazz to yell at you for talking to the stage directions.
The pigeon guy: WHAAAAH.
Rhu: Hello! Sorry. We heard that you were a philosopher, and Hazz'ridan said you might be important.
Gaurav: Talking to the stage directions?
Frezak (GM): Hello Mr.Signpost.
Greibel: Hi, fourth wall!
Greibel waves
Frezak (GM): GO ask the wall if it wants some pot.
The porridge extends a tendril of goop and waves as well.
The pigeon guy: Ughv this isn't... what...
The pigeon guy stares blearily up at Rhu.
Rhu waves at the pigeon guy
Rhu: Hello. Are you familiar with the scripture of dead ends?
The pigeon guy: Isn't that... Fred has scripts. Don't...
I... nnntgh.
Dead odds?
Rhu: Dead ENDS
No
?
Hazz'ridan the Mighty said you might be important.
Rhu looks at the pigeon guy suspiciously
The pigeon guy: It's this an in at whunnng.
The pigeon guy tries to rub his eyes and winds up smacking himself in the face with the back of his hand.
Bear Soup Guy: Does Greibel speak stoned bum?
Apheori (GM): I hope so.
Gaurav: I wonder if Radek can do his 24-hours ritual on "stoned bum"
Rhu sighs
Rhu: Important or not, you're certainly in no state to speak.
Still, another dead end! That's something.
Greibel: Hello pigeon-head!
CAN. YOU. UNDERSTAND. ME?
Ganelon: What, "Comprehend Language"?
Trust me, he'd have used it on Rhu or Greibel already if "nonsense" were a language.
Gaurav: hehe
Apheori (GM): Maybe it is! Maybe Radek is just too stubborn to accept the possibility
Frezak (GM): "babble'
Frezak (GM): Or too grumpy.
The pigeon guy: NO... yes.
Whah?
Bear Soup Guy: I like that interpretation *_*
err
^_^
Greibel: DO. YOU. KNOW. STUFF?
The pigeon guy sits up properly, propping against the bed.
The pigeon guy grins slowly.
The pigeon guy: NOPE!
Greibel: OKAY. THANK. YOU.
The pigeon guy: Don't know lots of things.
Lot's.
Lo'ts.
More.
I can tell you things. Things you...
You.
The pigeon guy waves a hand.
Rhu: Yes! Tell us things!
The pigeon guy: Things I don't know?
Radek: Or knock yourself unconscious again.
The pigeon guy: Yeeeah.
The pigeon guy tries to grab Rhu.
Radek: It might be amusing the third time.
Gaurav: I'm just imagining the pigeon guy saying "lots ... lot's? lo'ts?" out loud and it's the funniest thing ever
Rhu: Hey!
Apheori (GM) completely misses.
The pigeon guy completely misses.
Apheori (GM): Oops.
The pigeon guy: Try this. It'll shooow you.
Greibel: That's certainly one way to show him
Rhu: Try what?
Greibel: Whaddaya got there?
The pigeon guy stares off into space, waving a finger around for a bit.
Rhu follows the finger with his eyes
The pigeon guy then reaches into his pocket, pulls out a mushroom, and hands it to Rhu, still staring off into space.
Rhu: Oh. Thanks.
Frezak (GM): GO WILD
Greibel: Oh. He wants you to see what he sees.
Radek nudges Gravy. "If they both pass out at once, can you carry both of them?"
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+12 perception check to see if the mushroom looks like anything Rhu, a city boy through and through, can make sense of
(
4
)
+12
=
16
Greibel: It's a drug, silly
Apheori (GM): It looks like the dried mushrooms his roommate put in a stew once.
Rhu: It's a snack, isn't it? Can you eat it? Some mushrooms are poisonous.
Greibel: Heh heh
Yes
Rhu offers it to Greibel, who seems to know more about these things than he does.
The pigeon guy spills a bunch of other mushrooms on the floor and starts mumbling.
The pigeon guy: Eyes... Eyes in the dark... Softly speaking, tendrils... shadows...
Greibel: It's actually pretty weird that they let him keep the mushrooms in his cell
Oh well
The pigeon guy stiffens and jerks and starts shouting.
Greibel covertly picks some of the mushrooms up
The pigeon guy: YOU CAN'T KEEP ME.
YOU CAN'T.
YOU CAN'T SEE.
NOTHING TO SEEEEE.
The pigeon guy collapses and passes out again.
Greibel: Oh okay!
Greibel jogs back to the door to the cell
Rhu picks up the other mushrooms
Radek: Feeling enlightened, either of you?
Greibel: Yeah, you'll be joking when these mushrooms make us see the canyons of your miiiiiiiiind, man
Rhu sniffs at one of the mushrooms, then takes a nibble.
Gaurav: What does it taste like?
Apheori (GM): Spicy.
Rich.
A bit meaty.
Rhu: Mm. Nice!
This'll make a nice soup later.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: d20
Greibel:
rolling 1d20+12 Nature check on the mushrooms to see what their effects really might be
(
2
)
+12
=
14
Radek: If you could understand even a fraction of my disdain for you, I suspect it would shatter what little remains of your disjointed consciousness.
Bear Soup Guy: D'UUUUUHH WAT IS PLANTZ
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You're pretty sure they're drugs, possibly hallucinogens from the effects.
Gaurav: hey, 14 is perfectly respectable! You definitely know this is a mushroom.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20
(
4
)
=
4
Apheori (GM): Who was Radek talking to?
Ganelon: For two super-experts in your respective fields, you guys sure are unlucky.
Gaurav: Begun, the cycle of despair and enforced walks into ponds has.
Frezak (GM): You want me to roll on drugs?
Ganelon: Greibel, this time.
Apheori (GM): Did you eat it?
Rhu: You begin to feel really weird. Light. Fuzzy.
Almost floating.
Rhu: Ooh. This feels nice.
Apheori (GM): Things don't really seem clearer. In fact everything seems... murkier. Colours dimmed, and displaced. People glowing oddly. Objects fading...
Rhu: ... hey ... come back ...
Grbbbbl, stop glowing. It's ridiclus.
Greibel: Oh yeah, nice man.
I'll be right here, I just might look like a disembodied consciousness
But that's normal
Rhu looks at Greibel funny, then nods.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: d20
Rhu:
rolling d20
(
1
)
=
1
Gaurav: ooooooooooooooo
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Everyone do stuff now.
Bear Soup Guy: HAH
Rhu tries to work out which colour is being displaced to which other colour, but every time he does the colours rearrange themselves and it's quite anonying actually
Frezak (GM): So how do we undrug Rhu?
Hit him with sticks?
Apheori (GM): Good question!
Bear Soup Guy: We have to get him to see stuff though!
Or he'll try anyway
Gaurav: You could also leave Rhu in this cell and go do something sensible like find out more about the weapons or something.
Apheori (GM): Or you could drag him around.
See what there is to see.
Yes!
Ganelon: On drugs.
Yes.
Frezak (GM): Let's go learn science!
Do we have a wheelbarrow?
Apheori (GM): Rhu: The colours are starting to make sense. They describe things that aren't... strictly there. Variations of past and present, a narrative of presence...
Gaurav: Can Rhu walk? Maybe he can be lead?
Wheelbarrow! Yes, perfect!
Apheori (GM): He can walk.
He's still standing.
Frezak (GM): IN straight lines?
Rhu wonders what a mushroom milkshake would taste like
Frezak (GM): And not waddle off?
Apheori (GM): Well, you might have to... hold onto... yeah.
Frezak (GM): Someone tie a rope to him.
Bear Soup Guy: Greibel will keep an eye on him because he feels responsible
Frezak (GM): I'm probably the heaviest here, so I suppose i'll do that.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You notice Radek isn't glowing the same was as the others. He's more just an object, not quite there, mostly gone. An emptiness in space. Greibels hands are the same way, for some reason.
Gaurav: Yeah, I'd've thought Greibel would be prepared for sudden drag-induced stupors.
Apheori (GM): same way*
Ganelon: I approve of this state of being.
Rhu: (mumbles) hey, what's wrong, Radek? Hey? What ... why are't you glowing right? You're not glowing right.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: Greibel and the Gravedigger are brilliant and colourful... you seem normal. You can't see your own glow.
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Rhu: loooooook at my hand, it's soooooo normal
wheee
Frezak (GM): Gravy IS A RAAAIIINOW
or a rainbow.
Greibel puts his hands on Rhu's shoulders
Greibel: Now think man
You needed to see some important stuff
(To Rhu): Go. See what you need to see. The ends await.
Greibel: Just keep thinking important stuff and maybe you can find out what we're doing here, and possibly the fundamental relation of all cosmic bodies, if the effect lasts long enough
Rhu: Huh? Yeah?
Greibel just told me to see what I need to see. But he said it in Hazz'ridan's voice? What?
Radek: You could also see the miserable direction your life is taking.
That would be helpful too.
Rhu: The ends await. Mm. Good. Good. I need ends. Dead ends for me please.
Also tea. And a milkshake.
Gaurav: What do the buildings look like?
Colour-wise
Are Gravy and Greibel similar colours, or just different kinds of vibrant colours?
Apheori (GM): You're still inside.
The walls are just objects, there but not important. Think... uh... ambient occlusion maps.
Gravy and greibel are different colours but in the same ways.
So. Gravy has a rope around Rhu and Greibel has ahold of Rhu's shoulders...
Gaurav: Lemme do another perception check from within this maelstorm of colour and see if I notice anything.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+12 perception check
(
8
)
+12
=
20
Frezak (GM): RELEASE THE RHU
Gaurav: You are in a maze of twisty passages, all alike. You might be eaten by a Rhu. Especially if you look like milkshake.
Frezak (GM): You might be eaten by a Rhu :P
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You notice the pigeon philosopher on the floor is also glowing, but much more faintly. Same with the other prisoners, and the guards. It is a different sort of glow...
And you realise you can see the glow through walls, even. Some on what is probably the street outside, some sleeping guards above...
Gaurav: X-ray vision! Cool!
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You see darker things, too. Not absenses, holes, like Radek, but thinner spots... there's one in front of you now. It doesn't fit the shape of reality.
Rhu: Huh. Huh.
Rhu pokes the thinner spot in front of me
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You get the impression that the thinner spot is staring at you.
Rhu stares back
Bear Soup Guy: When you stare into the abyss, the abyss stares back
Rhu stares back harder
Apheori (GM): You guys might want to drag him out and do something else. Seriously.
Ellemerr: Amadi. Mad girl with no sense of what's going on. I can do that. *shifty eyes*
Apheori (GM): Rhu: The thinner spot shimmers slightly.
YES.
Ellemerr: Put me in wherever.
Bear Soup Guy: Amadi vs. Stoney Rhu :D
Apheori (GM): Show up wherever.
Rhu: Is that spot staring back at me?
Ellemerr: I don't know what is even there.
Rhu pokes the spot again
Amadi stares at Rhu, squinting a little.
(To Rhu): Ignore that. Move!
Apheori (GM): So Amadi just appeared behind Radek.
Radek jumps a little.
Apheori (GM): Amadi: You're in a dungeon orsomething.
Rhu: Oh. Err. Yes, Lord Ha-- Lord Harzsdi-- Lord Hazzdriddann. Let's go.
Amadi: You... you have soup. Right there. Soup.
Amadi shudders.
Rhu: Hey guys we should we should go Lor-- that guy I pray to. He said this. He said we should. We should.
Rhu points towards the exit
Greibel: God told us through a mushroom man to leave the jail cell
Let's go!
Amadi: Let's go!
Go when?
Gaurav: Greibel: hahahaha YES
Radek: Thank the gods.
Gaurav: That is a perfect sentence.
Guard pokes his head into the cells area.
Bear Soup Guy: =D
Guard: Is everythign all right in hthere?
The Gravedigger: DOn't ask.
They might answer.
Rhu starts to giggle at the guard
Gaurav: What sort of colour is he?
Amadi: No. There's soup.
I want a sandwich.
Guard: Erm...
Guard looks the place over and backs out.
Apheori (GM): The guard is like the prisoners - muted. Mostly grey.
Amadi: Why are you...?
Amadi wavesa finger towards the guard's face.
Apheori (GM): So you all head back out, passing the group of guards at their table, who do a very unconvncing job of pretending that everything is perfectly normal.
The guard studiously ignores Amadi as well.
Frezak (GM): You mean this ISNT normal?
Greibel: Haters gonna hate
Guard mutters, "ignore it and it'll go away..."
Amadi: Pfft. Liar.
Gaurav: ... nobody is at all suspicious that we entered a dungeon with four people and are leaving with five?
We should have taken the philosopher pigeon as well.
Ellemerr: They're ignoring me so I might go away.
Apheori (GM): That's probably why they're being so... weird. They don't recognise the fifth, though, so they're just pretending it didn't happen.
Y'all head out to the street. It's getting later. WHAT DO YOU DO NOW?
Rhu practices walking
Apheori (GM): Rhu: The light is all meaningless. Sun, shadows, reflections. There's a different light now, not of light itself, but of presence and absolute, what is and isn't. The people glow, but faintly. Objects fade in and out of relevance.
Amadi: This is... not midnight, right?
Apheori (GM): Amadi: You can probably see this too on top of everything else, but you still see normal.
Radek: Not yet.
Apheori (GM): Amadi: Whatever the hell normal even is for you.
Amadi: See, I know what time it isn't. I totally know what... Mm, that colour look tasty.
Gaurav: Objects fade in and out of ... relevance?
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You notice Amadi is glowing even more brightly than the others, and differently too. Like she's something else, something bigger, older...
And if you look at her the wrong way, something just like Radek.
But then you can't get it to happen again.
Frezak (GM): She's hazz.
Apheori (GM): The objects are... flat.
Ellemerr: Don't be rude, Frezak.
Apheori (GM): People pass by. They're mostly different colours, and all rather faint, though there is variation.
Rhu stares at Amadi for a while
Apheori (GM): Amadi glows.
Radek: We have an address.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You can't make out just what the colour actually is, though. Purple? Blue? Red?
Amadi stares back at Rhu, then makes a rude face.
Apheori (GM): Black?
The Gravedigger: I'm sure it'll be great.
Maybe they'll give us biscuits.
Radek: Maybe they'll take these two off our hands.
Rhu is oblivious of any rudeness, and does that move-head-from-side-to-side thing you do when trying to determine parallax
The Gravedigger: LET'S GO TO THE ADRESS
Greibel: Maybe they'll...tell us stuff?
Apheori (GM): Rhu: The blackness flickers. It makes you slightly ill.
Amadi: No they won't, Radek. That's your name now? Hm. You should change it.
Apheori (GM): Which address do you go to? The one with the weapons, or the one on the rock?
Well, that came with the rock.
Radek: I like my name as-is.
Amadi: Clearly you're not very smart.
Were we going sometime?
Gaurav: Them's fighting words
Bear Soup Guy: Brain-fighting
Ganelon: Oh my.
She's getting death-glares over that.
Apheori (GM): Chrome-shiny death glares.
Ganelon: Yeah, it's probably hard to read his face but he's still gonna try.
Amadi rolls back and forth at her heels, looking bored.
Greibel: To the address!
Apheori (GM): Which one? Who leads?
Frezak (GM): Radek?
I don't know if anyone else read the thing?
Ganelon: Sure.
His was illegible.
Apheori (GM): So stoned guy read the other one?
Oh dear.
Gaurav: It's in the log somewhere.
Should I copy it in here?
Ellemerr: In an attempt at being true to my character I've promptly forgotten everything. *shifty eyes*
Apheori (GM): Forgotten what, now?
Ellemerr: The world.
Apheori (GM): Huh?
Ellemerr: I don't know. >.>
Apheori (GM): I kid.
Ellemerr: I'm not sure if I do.
Apheori (GM): Radek: You don't actually know how to get there. Do you set off anyway, ask for directions, or something else?
Ganelon: I'll ask someone.
Frezak (GM): Rename the streets and complain at people that their town is wrong
Ganelon: Later.
Apheori (GM): Okay, you ask someone, and then run away because you're scary.
Frezak (GM): Ask a guard
They're not allowed to run.
Ellemerr: I could ask!
Frezak (GM): YOU'RE INSAAAANE
Ellemerr: I look perfectly un-scary.
Frezak (GM): INSANE IN THE MEMBRANE
And so's Amadi.
Ellemerr: Yeah but I'm sure they're used to that.
Ganelon: How dare they flee from me.
Frezak (GM): IF ONLY YOU COULD GRAB
Ganelon: Actually I'd love to use a, uh...
Tethercord.
If I had one.
Apheori (GM): Well, a nearby guard overheard/saw and comes up and tells you.
Gaurav: Gan: hehe
Apheori (GM): SO GOOD JOB.
Frezak (GM): Aw.
Thanks Mr.Guard.
TO THE PLACE
Apheori (GM): He's also looking at Rhu worriedly.
Radek: Well at least someone in this place has a sense of manners.
Frezak (GM): Yes.
The only person was the guard.
Excluding all other people.
Apheori (GM): Guards are paid.
Frezak (GM): From being mannered.
Ganelon: It's okay, I'm old.
I'm entitled to my grumpiness.
Frezak (GM): Also covered in lead.
ONWARDS
Apheori (GM): YOU GO ON TO THE PLACE.
It has a really big statue of a crossbow stuck to the front of the building.
It's hard to miss.
Gaurav: What colour is the crossbow?
Ganelon: Not a real crossbow?
Frezak (GM): Is this the armourer's or the place on the note?
Apheori (GM): The sign says 'Rorik and Sons'.
Frezak (GM): Huh.
Ganelon: Ah, it's the guy arming the guards.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: The crossbow is an object. Not terribly interesting.
Rhu: It seems to be just people.
That glow.
And stuff.
Dim places are are. Thinner places.
Frezak (GM): It's made of peeeople
Rhu: (mumbles) Oh. I gettit. It's just people. Just people.
Radek: What a waste of stone. They could have made this a functional piece of siege equipment.
Gaurav: "Rorik, Sons and Daughters, but not the one who ran away to join the circus who we don't talk about"
Ganelon: Well, I'll go inside without really waiting on these other clowns.
Amadi: At least they know what their name is. Why aren't you named Rorik?
Ganelon: He wouldn't answer that.
Amadi: ... Or... Harold. Harold would suit you. You couldn't be a Valentine.
Apheori (GM): The inside is full of weapons and weapon parts. Crossbows and swords seem to be a specialty, lining most of the walls. Quite a few rods and staves are also present, including the model the guards seemed to have.
Random parts are also strewn everywhere, and in bins.
There's an old guy with a beard working on a crossbow.
Amadi falls into step beside Rhu, takes his arm and walks him inside. "Would you be my Valentine?"
Radek: You there! I take it you are Rorik?
Apheori (GM): Rhu: When she touches you, you are overcome with warmth. It is as though she is the brightest thing in the universe, and has only brightness to share...
Frezak (GM): ANY SHOVELS?
Apheori (GM): No shovels.
Frezak (GM): This shop sucks.
Apheori (GM): In sight, anyway.
You could ask.
Rorik: That I am!
Frezak (GM): IF SHOVELS ARE NOT IN PRIME POSITION THIS PLACE IS AN INSULT TO A THING
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Radek: Your shop sells wands. Do I dare to assume that means you know something about magic?
Rorik: A thing or two, perhaps. Did you have something in mind?
Apheori (GM) pokes Ellemerr and Gaurav with a stick.
Gaurav: oops, sorry
Greibel goes to stare absently at all the staves he can't afford
Gaurav: chatting with my advisor in the next window
Radek: Well, dimensional rifts are tearing your world apart at the seams and I should like to know if anyone has been studying a way to close them.
Rhu holds on to Amadi's hand with both hands. The warmth feels good.
Gaurav: How cold is it in this town? Or this planet?
Apheori (GM): Warm.
It's like summer or something.
Radek: Now I don't expect you to have an answer, necessarily, but as the technology here seems unsuited to the task, arcane study strikes me as the next most likely way to a solution.
Rorik looks slightly surprised, then says, "You sure? Seems like something that would be in the news."
Amadi leans closer to Rhu, smiling faintly. "Careful," she mutters. "You'll smell the burning."
Rorik: Guards chatter, of course, but aside from some weirdness on the planes I certainly wouldn't call the world falling apart...
Rhu sniffs
Rorik: Here's a thought. There's always weirdness. There's also explosives. Have you tried...
Rorik gets out a large box.
Rorik: ...blowing up the weirdness?
Radek grins widely.
Gaurav: o.0
Greibel 's interest is piqued
Amadi lowers her voice even more; "On your tongue... You'll smell it on your -"
Radek: I admit to have been lacking materials.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You can't smell the burning. The box, however, is glowing.
Amadi: EXPLODE!
Apheori (GM): Rhu: So is Rorik, though less than the box. But he's glowing more than most folk around here.
Gaurav: this plan strikes me as terrible, ill-advised, ridiculous but also awesome
Rhu: (to Rorik) Excuse me, sir, but why are you glowing?
Rorik: (To Radek) Then you, my good friend, have come to exactly the right place.
What?
Rorik looks at himself.
Radek: He's drugged up.
Rorik: I'm not glowing.
Rhu: Shiny. Very shiny. Also: your box. Also shiny.
Rorik: Ah, well.
Rhu: (to Amadi) You can see it, can't you, Mrs. Teatime?
Rorik: You'll be wanting to check this, then.
Rorik opens the box and shows Radek a pile of parts inside.
Amadi: It's not teatime. I know what time it isn't.
Rorik: Some assembly required, but you, sir, look like someone who could do far more with this than with anything pre-made...
Rhu nods distractedly at Amadi
Radek: Oh, assembly is the best part.
Gaurav: I'm suddenly imagining Radek playing with LEGO.
Ganelon: And stepping on the bricks?
Maybe that's why he's so grumpy.
Too many LEGO brick incidents growing up.
Ellemerr giggles.
Gaurav: hehe
Amadi giggles for no apparent reason.
Ganelon: So, what can I discern about these parts?
The porridge slides off Greibel's shoulder and goes splat on the floor.
Rhu points confusedly at the box
Apheori (GM): They're magical.
Greibel: :/
Rhu: Why is the box glowing?
Apheori (GM): And kind of strong.
Radek: And really explosive. You can see exactly how to put them all together such that it could... well, put a really massive hole in the planet, for instance.
Frezak (GM): THE BIGGEST HOLE
Ganelon: Oh yes.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: The porridge is not glowing.
Greibel: Okay Rasputin, you can walk around and take a look if you like.
But don't get the staves all slimey.
The porridge sits there.
Radek: ...Say, you build crossbows here. Have you ever heard of a rifle?
Amadi: Rasputin is a good name too. Very good.
Frezak (GM): Oatey staves.
Rorik: Can't say I have.
Greibel: Thanks, gypsy girl!
Amadi: I'm going to be named Rasputing tomorrow.
Radek: Something like this.
Rhu: Rasputing would suit you well.
Radek places his rifle over the counter.
Rorik picks it up and gives it a look-over.
Rorik pops it open after a bit of fiddling and looks inside.
Rorik starts looking very, very interested.
Frezak (GM): If he breaks your shit I'm not throwing things for you.
Ganelon: As if I couldn't fix it.
Although I think Radek is proficient in using shovels.
Rorik nods. "Now this," he says, putting it back together and handing it back, "is definitely doable."
Amadi leans her head on Rhu's shoulder - or more likely arm, since she probably won't reach the shoulder - and groans slowly and quietly.
Rorik: Would you have a... smaller one you'd be willing to part with? Something that is not so much a part of you?
Gaurav: Does Amadi's head feel magically warm like her hands do? (Or are her hands just normal and Rhu is making much of it because he's stoned?)
Radek: Not quite. I have some standard-issue laser weapon, but... well, you would need lenses to build one of those.
Apheori (GM): Amadi is warm. She is a source of power, and Rhu feels that power...
Rhu looks around a bit to see where the groaning is coming from, then realizing it's Amadi.
Radek: I could draw you a blueprint for either in a day.
Ellemerr: I need to at some point find out why Rhu is stoned.
Apheori (GM): Or at least he thinks he does.
Rhu: (to Amadi) Mrs. Teatime, what's wrong?
Rorik: Lenses?
Frezak (GM): How long would it take him to teach the guy to read blueprints?
Amadi: Can you see... In my head...?
Rorik: Some of the staves use those. Focus the beam, the better to punch holes through several tonnes of rock...
The city used to have walls, you know.
Ganelon: I'll hand him the pistol.
Rorik looks extremely pleased with himself.
Gaurav: Ellemerr: Rhu took the slightest nibble of a mushroom that the stoned philosopher gave him. All he knows is that Hazz'ridan seems to approve of this course.
Radek: Here.
Apheori (GM) picks up the pistol and examines it as well.
Rorik picks up the pistol and examines it as well.
Ellemerr: Hazz would at that. xD
Rorik: Hmm... this is somewhat more efficient. Different principle from the rifle, of course, but... how much do you want for it?
Gaurav: DM: stop taking guns out of the game!
Rorik: And if the blueprints are for sale...
Frezak (GM): GUNS ARE FOR PUSSIES
Rhu squints and stares at Amadi's forehead
Apheori (GM): Dude, this guy's going to be MAKING them. XD
Ellemerr: Agreed. I'm voting for shovels any day.
Gaurav: An all-shovel army would be a terrifying thing indeed.
Frezak (GM): SHOVELS
Also.
Apheori (GM): Shovels!
Frezak (GM): If these guys wander around with laser guns.
It might be a problem in teh future.
If we set up a despotic empire.
For some quick cash.
Ellemerr: Ya think?
Apheori (GM): Rhu: d20
Radek: Haven't the faintest idea. Rifts dropped me here scarcely more than a day ago and I'm still amazed you people carry your currency with you.
Gaurav: Should that eventuality arise.
Rhu:
rolling d20
(
5
)
=
5
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You can't see in her head. Too much glow.
Radek: You seem like you've got your head on straight, at least.
Gaurav: I'm saving up all my rolls > 10 for my community ecology class.
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Rhu shakes his head sadly
Rhu: (to Amadi) You have too much glow. I cannot see a thing. Does it hurt to glow that much?
Apheori (GM): Okay, what would a nice, heavy crossbow sell for?
With some magic.
Amadi: Hurt.
Amadi says the word in a tone of voice that strips it of all meaning.
Ganelon: Well, if it's a +1 magic thing, it's worth 360 GP (but sell price tends to be between 20-50% of that depending on what you think is best as the DM).
Rorik: I'll give you 200 for it. Another 500 for the blueprints.
Rhu: Aww. (pats Amadi's head with the arm Amadi isn't leaning against) Poor Mrs. Teatime.
The porridge slowly pulls itself back together and slithers over to Gravy's foot.
Frezak (GM): Ew.
Radek: Fantastic. I hope you put them to good use.
Frezak (GM): Gravy will try to evade the breakfast.
Apheori (GM): You'll still need to make the blueprints, though.
Amadi: Is it time yet? I know what time it isn't. Why am I now?
Rorik: I fully intend to.
Rorik gives Radek 200 coin things and slips the gun under the table.
Rorik: When'll you have the blueprints ready?
Rhu: (to Amadi) When are you trying to be?
Radek: Tomorrow. I don't sleep, so it should be quite a simple matter.
Rorik: Perhaps we can call those a straight trade for this box?
Amadi: I... don't know anymore. I don't even know.
Amadi sighs.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You see shapes in Amadi's glow.
Radek: Certainly.
Greibel continues browsing, unaware as to the porridge's exploits
Rorik nods happily.
Ganelon: Well, that's all I need for now.
Rorik: (to Greibel) You interested in any of those?
Radek: It was a rare pleasure doing business with you.
Rorik: Oh, indeed.
Very rare.
Greibel: Ah
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+12 perception checks: what shapes?
(
2
)
+12
=
14
Greibel: Can't say I need them or could afford them
Just admiring
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You have no idea. They're not objects. Not in the traditional sense. Metaphorical objects. Containers? Bones.
Gaurav: Bones! Is she a Dire Lady?
Apheori (GM): Bones with the flesh gone, flesh that would define them, flesh that is the thing itself...
Metaphorical bones.
Rorik: Well, if you ever need and can afford, there's even better to be admired in back. Do remember that.
Rorik turns away.
Greibel: I think I will remember that
The porridge finally manages to hop onto Gravy's leg and clings.
Greibel: At least for the next few minutes until the drugs make me forget again
The Gravedigger: Greibel.
Please remove Rasputin from my leg.
Rhu is a little scared by the bones, so he holds Amadi's hand a little tighter so he can feel more of her warmth.
Greibel: Awwwww
He wants to play!
The Gravedigger: With my LEG?
It's just squelching.
Greibel: He's not picky
The Gravedigger: Well, I'm on duty right now, so if you could take it off?
Greibel: Fine
The Gravedigger: Thank you.
Greibel pulls Rasputin off with a popping sound
Greibel: Spoil sport
(To Rhu): You must let go. She is an illusion that blinds. You cannot lose your way.
(To Rhu): You are MINE.
Amadi attempts to wiggle her squeezed fingers.
The porridge somehow manages to look incredibly disappointed.
Rhu releases his grip a bit
Amadi "Aaaw"s and whistles at Rasputin.
Rhu: But she's warm
Amadi: You think she's warm, but it's only outside. Ice boiling.
(To Rhu): Warmth distracts. You must step into the dark to see.
(To Amadi): Do you want him?
Amadi: ... No, that's not it. It's tea. I just want a Valentine.
Gaurav: Okay, I'm going to say that the drugs are making Rhu want to keep holding on to Amadi for the warmth, but he's going to try to break away and listen to his god now. Should I roll a d20, or some sort of fortitude thingie?
(To Amadi): Someday, perhaps, I will show you what it means to spread. And you will show me what it means to dream.
(To Amadi): Consider it a promise of a promise.
Apheori (GM): Roll a... sure, I dunno.
Gaurav:
rolling d20
(
14
)
=
14
Amadi attempts to tear herself away from Rhu.
Amadi: My dreams are my own!
Rhu lets go immediately
Apheori (GM): Amadi: You hear laughter echoing away in your head.
Frezak (GM): brb
Amadi: Mydreamsaremyownmydreamsaremyownmydreamsaremydreamsaremydreams-
Gaurav: If you don't think I've nearly copied bits of this game into the chat with my advisor, you don't understand how sleepy I am right now.
Latest one: "Amadi: ... No, that's not it. It's tea. I just want a Valentine. "
which would have been tough to explain
Apheori (GM): Hah!
Amadi slumps down at the floor, clutching her head.
Radek: (To Rorik) Every day, they do this.
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Rorik snorts and shakes his head.
Gaurav: DM: can we say Rhu has snapped out of his drug-induced haze? Or was that 14 not good enough?
Rorik: And this was why sensible men invented weapons.
Ganelon: Thank you so much for this character.
Apheori (GM): The 14 wasn't good enough to pull away, let alone snap out of it. Amadi just managed to make it happen anyway.
That said you can roll for that now.
Rhu: d20!
Gan: He wants to sell you weapons.
(From Ellemerr): I love answering whispers out loud. So much.
(To Ellemerr): It's awesome.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20
(
14
)
=
14
Like I said, 14
Gaurav: Oops, sorry
Rhu is still very out of it. He looks at Amadi slumped on the floor with consternation and confusion.
Ganelon: Radek unfortunately has a fine weapon of his own already. Also, he's grumpy and mean but not evil enough to shoot any of his "friends".
Well, not evil at all, I say.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: Some of the glow fades. It's less clear now.
Amadi curls up on the floor, still muttering about her dreams - the words seem to be "I dream" now - and then, with a shudder, she falls asleep. A moment later, she's disappeared.
Rhu: Huh.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: With Amadi gone, everything else suddenly gets much brighter.
Rhu: Ouch! Too bright!
Rhu squints
Apheori (GM): ...not that bright.
Ellemerr cackles
Ellemerr: And now you shall turn BLIND!
Rhu looks around
Apheori (GM): It's like the brightest thing in a room goes out, and then you see all he light you missed.
Gaurav: Gotcha. Rhu is still stoned, though, right?
Apheori (GM): Well, okay, Rhu might get blinded, but that's Rhu.
Mostly.
Rhu looks at his own hand, which is still normal I suppose.
Rhu: Hmm.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: d20
Rhu:
rolling d20
(
5
)
=
5
Ellemerr: And now I'm going to follow Amadi's prime example and chase some dreams. I'll possibly pop back when you last expect it.
Apheori (GM): You have a suspicious feeling abot your hand.
Like it might be out to get you.
Bear Soup Guy: Bye Ellemerr
Apheori (GM): Dream well, dreamer of freams.
dreams
Gaurav: Pretty sure those 14s are the last >10 rolls I've got in me tonight.
today
Bear Soup Guy: Dream we- what she said
Gaurav: Bye, Ellemerr!
Rhu looks at his hand, aghast; then hides it behind his back and quickly looks around to make sure it isn't coming to get him.
Ellemerr: Sweet daydreams and nightmares to one and all.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: The feeling fades almost immediately.
Rhu still keeps one hand behind his back, just in case. You can't trust hands.
Apheori (GM): Sane people: Care to move the peanut gallery along?
Gaurav: Oops, almost forgot: I have to leave for class in ~45 mins!
Ganelon: I think Frezak's not back yet, so that leaves it up to me.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: An imperative fills your head - go the place. Find the truth. Use the rock.
INHALE TRUTH.
Gaurav: Gan: as usual.
Ganelon: And honestly, the image of Radek just idly complaining as people fall to the ground mumbling to themselves is very amusing to me.
Apheori (GM): In this case Greibel is relatively sane as well.
Frezak (GM): Back.
Apheori (GM): Hello.
Radek: Alright, everyone out if you're not buying anything.
Rhu: What if you're inhaling the truth?
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Radek: Fresh air is the truth.
Rhu: We should go to the place with the rock. In the truth.
Radek: Outside.
Rhu mumbles something about truthiness but followed Radek
Radek: This man deserves better than the burden of your company.
Rorik chuckles quietly to himself.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: The air outside is AIR.
Frezak (GM): I'll waddle out.
THis place has nothing for me.
Apheori (GM): SHOCKING, HUH?
Ganelon: I'm really glad that nobody else in the party is particularly sensitive to insults or I'd actually feel guilty about being so awful to them.
Gaurav: Air-type air is a rare gift.
(To Rhu): Go.
Ganelon: I the player, that is. About Radek being awful to them.
Gaurav: Rhu is already outside.
Apheori (GM): This is certainly an... interesting party in that regard.
Ganelon: He couldn't care less if your feelings get hurt. He only has infusions for healing *actual* damage.
Apheori (GM): Gaurav: Hazz wants you to keep walking.
KEEP WALKING.
Rhu keeps walking, then realizes he's going the wrong direction, stops and turns.
Ganelon: So, we know where these people with the rocks are leading us, right?
Rhu walks in the opposite direction for a bit before realizing he has no idea where he's going.
Rhu: What rock? This rock?
Ganelon: At least one of us does?
Rhu hands it and the note to Gan
Apheori (GM): Rhu doesn't even know. He knows which way to walk he's walking.
and he's walking*
Rhu keeps on a'walking
Frezak (GM): Not he can't.
He's tied to Gravy.
By love and rope.
Apheori (GM): Okay, he bounces off the rope after a bit.
But he still walked as far as he could get.
Rhu: Hey!
hey
I think it's this way.
Apheori (GM): He's still trying to walk. It is imperative.
Rhu: We should walk. I have very strong feelings about this.
Frezak (GM): Do we think it's a good idea to whatever thing Rhu feels like doing or thinks a voice told him to do?
Is he some kind of oracle at this point or just a madman?
Ganelon: That's a hard line to draw.
Frezak (GM): Well we need a pen.
Gaurav: I've been wondering that for a while.
At some point it's going to be easier to just tie him to a wheelbarrow and ask him to point out things that may be of interest.
Bear Soup Guy: Well at this point I think we're following him because we don't really have any other leads so we're seeing what comes of it
Ganelon: We have an address from that strange teleporting woman, don't we?
Bear Soup Guy: Do we?
Gaurav: The other strange teleporting woman
Apheori (GM): Rhu has it, at least.
Frezak (GM): So that WASNT Rorik's place?
Apheori (GM): Nope.
Gaurav: Rhu just handed it to Gan
Rorik's address we got from the guards after our almost-encounter with them
Frezak (GM): I thought they were telling us where the adress WAS
Ganelon: Yes, but that was a different one.
Now we need directions to this one.
Or so I assume.
Gaurav: That's the guards from earlier this game. Rorik's place we got from the guards on Saturday, I think.
Frezak (GM): Time to find a guard, then.
Gaurav: This town is crawling with guards.
Apheori (GM): Ŕhu is still pulling on the rope.
Ganelon: Might as well go in whatever direction he's headed until we find a guard.
Frezak (GM): Hokay, then.
If there are wyverns I'm blaming you.
Rhu doesn't hear; he's pretty focused on the whole walking in a particular direction thing at the mo'
Apheori (GM): There are guards in sight, though perhaps not immediately nearby.
Rhu walks down the streets at angles, corner to opptosite corner, turning in parts.
Shortest possibly path, even if it leads through other people.
Or things.
He winds up getting stuck on a lamppost.
Frezak (GM): "on" ?
Like, "on top of" ?
Apheori (GM): Behind?
Trying to walk through it.
Frezak (GM): Right.
I suppose i'll slide him, then.
Gaurav: ... wow, how stoned is he?
Rhu: There's a ... this pole's in my way
Radek: Do you suppose he'll ever recover?
Apheori (GM): Pretty stoned. Main issue is he's still seeing things weirdly, and probably didn't even see the post until he ran into it.
The Gravedigger: We'll find out.
Apheori (GM): Or he didn't see it in any particular position.
It is fading, though. Slightly.
Frezak (GM): Shit.
Gaurav: oof.
Frezak (GM): The lap-post is fading?
RUN.
Apheori (GM): Okay, he leads you down a few more streets in a step-like pattern and stops in front of a vacant lot.
Frezak (GM): RUN FOR THE HILLS
Apheori (GM): No, the... drug effect. XD
Frezak (GM): Well that's boring.
Gaurav: Pretty glad I walked into a lamppost and not a stranger, then.
Apheori (GM): You walked into a few of those, too. But they got out of your way on their onw.
Gaurav: Frezak: shh. you don't know how excited I am that only two things have randomly vanished since we've reached town. The stability of reality in the recent past is making me forget the horrors that we saw on Sarathi.
Oh, good.
Apheori (GM): Anyway, there's a fence around the lot. You're in front of a gate.
Frezak (GM): READ THE ADDRESS OF THIS PLACE
Apheori (GM): Inside appears to be a whole lot of weeds and stuff, and some bricks and a rusted wheelbarrow without a tire.
But this is the place.
Ganelon: Yeah.
Apheori (GM): You feel it.
Ganelon: I was about to ask.
Apheori (GM): Gan: The address is not the one on the note.
Frezak (GM): Bah.
Rhu points at the empty lot
Rhu: We're here.
... though I'm not sure where that is.
Frezak (GM): Hokay.
I will survey the area with EAGLE VISION
Rhu: ... I'm going to pray to Hazz'ridan now. He's pretty knowledgable about things like that.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You feel power here, but more important, you see colour. There is something of a glow in the very air in the lot, especially at the center. You know it is where to be.
Rhu: Wait ...
Rhu walks to the center
Apheori (GM): Rhu: d20
Frezak (GM): I hope we don't lose our second divine guy to a magic hole.
Rhu:
rolling d20
(
19
)
=
19
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Gaurav: I suppose that's why I'm tied to the most stable person in the party
Apheori (GM): Rhu: The greyed out effect of reality fades, and you feel more. Gravity. Weight. The presense of space, and everything pressing down...
Frezak (GM): THAT DOESNT SOUND BAD AT ALL
Apheori (GM): Nope.
It doesn't. YOU'RE RIGHT.
Seriously, though, do stuff.
Rhu: Oof. I'm going to sit down now.
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20+12 NATURE THE FIELD
(
19
)
+12
=
31
Rhu sits down under/next to the hole
Ganelon: Suddenly, 19s.
Gaurav: WOAH
Bear Soup Guy: I AM GOD
Gaurav: such rolle
Frezak (GM): What hole?
rolling 1D20+9+1+10
(
7
)
+9+1+10
=
27
Perception.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: The field is alive. It is full of life, and more than just that of the nromal world. This place has been touched by the gods, and that is probably why it is vacant, for none would want to build on top of that...
Greibel: But there's something missing. And empty space where Rhu is sitting.
Frezak (GM): THAT DOESNT SOUND BAD AT ALL.
Apheori (GM): An*
Frezak: You discern some of the same impressions, and notice the wheelbarrow has a wheel now. It didn't before.
Rhu prays, given the lack of anything else to do, and how heavy he feels and all that weight ...
Radek: So he sat down in the dirt.
Apheori (GM): Also there are a lot of bricks amidst the weeds.
The Gravedigger: THe Wheelbarrow just grew a wheel.
No longer a simple barrow
Greibel goes up to Rhu
Greibel: Look!
Can you feel the presence in this place?
Your God must have led you somewhere useful for once!
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+8 religion check: Rhu prays fervently
(
12
)
+8
=
20
Apheori (GM): A dark ooze trickles out of the ground and spreads around Rhu. Then several large tentacles reach out and wrap around him, pulling him into nothing.
The Gravedigger: Oh dear.
The Gravedigger PULLS ON THE ROPE
Greibel: Well....misjudged that one.
Apheori (GM): The rope dissolves.
In the dark stuff.
Frezak (GM): Crud.
Rhu: Huh, that was unexp---
Frezak (GM): WELL.
WE LOST OUR SECOND DIVINE DUDE TO A HOLE.
Gaurav: Divine characters are overrated, anyway.
Bear Soup Guy: Don't worry, it'll even out when the entire universe is swallowed by a black hole
Gaurav: The first rule of D&D, "Never split the party", suggests you all jump into this hole after me now. Just sayin'
Frezak (GM): Sersiously.
We should retire and become farmers while we still can.
Gaurav: Alternatively, you could report the hole to this town's police force and let them deal with it.
Frezak: XD
Frezak (GM): Yeah, if all the guards are eaten by teh hole we can rule as futuristic despots.
Apheori (GM): The dark stain on the ground begins to fade, sinking back down.
Greibel: RADEK! Blow up the hole!
Gaurav: I should leave for class in the next 10 mins, but given that Rhu has fallen into a hole
... and perhaps gone to that great, big dead-end in the sky ...
this might not be all that important
(To Gaurav): And we can discuss what happens in the hole... later,
Frezak (GM): Hazzridaninism doesn't sound so cool now >.>
Apheori (GM): Bwahahahah!
Gaurav: It's not done badly for a religion focused on dead ends! I wonder if it's, like, one of the Grand Big Religions or like a weird little sect that everybody looks down on.
Apheori (GM): Definitely a weird one.
Ganelon: Hm.
Apheori (GM): That people look at weirdly.
Frezak (GM): So this world does not like godlings.
Apheori (GM): Oh, they like them. Hazz'ridan is just a bit odd.
Frezak (GM): Well, both divine ones got et by otherwordly forces.
Ganelon: So you want me to throw a bomb in the hole as it closes?
Frezak (GM): YES
DO THAT
Ganelon: Okay. I do that.
Gaurav: I guess it'd be like if somebody in Hinduism set up a cult to worship Narada. It could happen, it'd just be very weird.
Before I go: so we're not meeting on Saturdays any more? Should we make this Tuesday slot regular?
Apheori (GM): A tentacle whips out of the hole and grabs the bomb before pulling back in as the entire dark stain disappears.
Frezak (GM): HAH
Bear Soup Guy: Yeah, I like tuesdays
"THANKS FOR THE BOMB"
Ganelon: It is timed to explode.
Gaurav: This hole isn't taking any of your shit. Or giant, earth-shattering kabooms.
Greibel: Huh...misjudged that one too
Frezak (GM): DELICIOUS.
BOMBS. EXPLODES IN YOUR MOUTH. OR TENTACLES.
Apheori (GM): Tuesdays are totally good. Unless I get a job.
So you all just lost Rhu and you're standing in a vacant lot.
Gaurav: We can reschedule when that happens. I suspect all these plans are month-to-month anyway.
Apheori (GM): You can sort of feel the power. You can sort of see the life feeding the adminitedly not very impressive weeds.
Gaurav: Okay, I'm going to leave for class early and be on time for once. Have fun, and see you all next Tuesday!
Frezak (GM): Is... Rhu weed-food now?
Apheori (GM): Rhu is just gone. You don't know what happened.
Ganelon: He might have died in a fiery explosion instead.
Frezak (GM): HAH
Ganelon: (actually they're not that powerful)
Frezak (GM): Roll bomb damage!
Apheori (GM): The tentacles were certainly not like anything in the previous hole.
And there was the bomb...
Greibel pounds fists on the ground where the hole was
Gaurav: You could do an untrained religion check and ask Hazz'ridan
Apheori (GM): Mysteries.
Greibel: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Gaurav: byeeeeeeee
Apheori (GM): Bye.
Ganelon: See ya.
Bear Soup Guy: Bye
Apheori (GM): Greibel: The ground is oddly soft. Like something has been recently planted.
Frezak (GM): RHUBARB
Apheori (GM): >.>
Bear Soup Guy: AHAHAHAHAHAH
Oh man, I almost missed that
Greibel: Well, if there's any bright side to this, it's that he's probably sitting in a tree in a parking lot in some other dimension
The Gravedigger: Doesn't sound too bright.
AS sides go, sounds pretty dim.
Well, we might as well go check out the address from the witch. At least we don't have any other god-worshippers to lose.
I hate this mission.
You know I signed up to kill things and bury them?
Two guys down already.
Radek: Both lost to holes, no less.
The Gravedigger: Don't think it counts as a hole when It's /full/ of acidic tentacles.
And Azri was eaten by a tunnel, technically.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: Give me a nature check.
Greibel:
rolling 1d20+12
(
14
)
+12
=
26
Apheori (GM): There's something down there. Beneath the bare earth. Something that should have sprouted but didn't. A seed.
Also the weeds are growing way too quickly around the edges of the lot.
Not so much closer to the center.
Frezak (GM): BENEATH THE EARTH, YOU SAY.
Apheori (GM): MAGIC.
Radek: HRM
Greibel: Gravy! Bring your shovel!
Hole time!
The Gravedigger: HOOOOOLE TIME
Greibel: There's some kind of seed down there. Seems like it'd be important....somehow
Frezak (GM): BEGIN DIGGING
Apheori (GM): YOU DIG.
Frezak (GM): I dig like the best.
Because I AM the best.
Apheori (GM): You dig a few feet down and hit metal.
Radek: .Well, you haven't killed anyone, but at least you're digging holes.
Frezak (GM): I will dig around the metal.
Like a good digsman.
Apheori (GM): It turns out to be a large rounded cone, a bit more than a meter across...
Frezak (GM): LIke a rocket head?
"nose" ?
Greibel: Like that weird thing in the third or fourth episode of Fringe?
Err
Bear Soup Guy: OOC
Greibel would totally watch Fringe though
Frezak (GM): No, that sounds fine IC for Greibel :P
Bear Soup Guy: =D
Apheori (GM): Kind of like that, but then it ends. It's just a cone, a but rounded.
bit
Frezak (GM): I'll ask Radek what he thinks about it.
Apheori (GM): I don't remember the thing.
The Gravedigger: Radek! Found... something.
Radek: Something?
The Gravedigger: Big metal cone thing?
If Greibel thinks it's a.. seed of some kind, that's actually pretty worrying.
Greibel: Maybe the seed is in the cone, smart guy
Radek: Let me have a look.
Ganelon: What can he discern about it?
Apheori (GM): Radek: It looks exactly like a rocket cone, like the modules used in some of the very first Artiilie space craft...
It's the sort of ancient history that most folks ain't even taught anymore.
Radek: This is definitely a rocket. Or... was.
Unbelievably old model.
The Gravedigger: Huh.
Think it got Hole'd here or was built locally?
Radek: Impossible to say.
The Gravedigger: think we should crack it open?
Radek: Well, it's not the explosive kind, so it couldn't hurt.
Frezak (GM): Our weapons are unbreakable, right?
Apheori (GM): No.
Radek: I would love to see what's inside, myself.
Frezak (GM): Damn.
Apheori (GM): I mean, they're mostly unbreakable, but if you do really crazy stuff with them...
Frezak (GM): Hack metal?
Apheori (GM): Depends on the metal.
Frezak (GM): This metal?
It's not ultratungestensteel is it?
Apheori (GM): I don't know. Can you tell what it is?
Frezak (GM): Wellll.
I did make my own shovels.
Ganelon: Our stuff is *newer*, that's for sure.
Frezak (GM): So i know SOME smithing/metallurgy.
Does it have rivets?
Apheori (GM): Yes.
It looks like it's safe.
HAVE AT IT or don't.
Frezak (GM): I'll try and shear them off with my battletrowel.
(handaxe)
Apheori (GM): You start to do that and notice something of an indentation - a seam around what might be a door.
You can either continue dismantlement or try to get Radek to open properly.
Frezak (GM): Gravy has no issues with asking Radek.
The Gravedigger: Looks like a.. door? Panel?
Ideas how to open it, Mr.Scienceman?
Ganelon: Well... is this thing powered?
Apheori (GM): It's cold and off.
Also mechanical.
Ganelon: Then the most he could do is tell Gravy where to apply force.
Frezak (GM): I can direct an edge into the seams, then.
Ganelon: Go for it.
Frezak (GM): I'll do it.
Apheori (GM): You pop the door open and it swings up, revealing not the dark interior of the cone, but a flood of blank sand that spills over your feet.
Frezak (GM): EVADE SAND
Apheori (GM): You wind up on top of the cone.
...looking utterly silly.
Frezak (GM): on top?
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Frezak (GM): Not... jumping back?
Apheori (GM): The sand is all around it.
In the hole.
Frezak (GM): What hole?
Apheori (GM): You found it several feet in the ground.
In the hole that you dug.
Did you pull it out out when I wasn't....
I dunno.
Frezak (GM): So that's too far to jump out?
Whatever.
I will examine the sand.
Apheori (GM): It looks weird. Slightly transparent, and rounded. But heavy like normal sand.
The Gravedigger: Hey, guys. What IS this?
Apheori (GM): Also there are some bones in it.
Small bones.
Frezak (GM): Nature to identify bones of what?
Apheori (GM): Like a dog or medium bird or something.
Ganelon: What, like marbles?
Apheori (GM): Very small marbles.
Sand-grain-sized.
Frezak (GM): Like... silicon dust?
Apheori (GM): But rounded.
Frezak (GM): Huh.
Again, can I get a more precise idea of what died in there?
Apheori (GM): Do you want to dig and find the rest?
Frezak (GM): Rest of what?
The 'rocket' ?
Apheori (GM): Identifiable bones.
Radek: Interesting.
Apheori (GM): They're just some random ones. Scattered in the sand.
Frezak (GM): Yeah, i'll gather bones.
Because I know bones.
That's a thing I know.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Frezak (GM): SANDWURM
Apheori (GM): You find some more and realise it's a cat.
Or was.
Frezak (GM): Aw.
Apheori (GM): Also the sand feels funny.
Rubbery almost.
Frezak (GM): What can we do to identify the sand?
Apheori (GM): I don't know.
Frezak (GM): >.>
Apheori (GM): Roll a thingy!
Bear Soup Guy: I should probably leave soon
Frezak (GM): Uhhh.
I have... Nature and perception.
BSG!
Bear Soup Guy: ROLL FOR SAND IDENTIFICATION
USE YOUR SAND VISION
Frezak (GM): ROLL FOR SAND
i'll identify their molecular structure!
rolling 1D20+20
(
4
)
+20
=
24
MAGIC EYES
Crud.
Bear Soup Guy: Does insight identify sand?
Frezak (GM): Reveal it's motives!
Bear Soup Guy: Or perception
SAND MOTIVES
Apheori (GM): It reminds you of packing material.
Frezak (GM): Can Radek roll science knowledge?
Ganelon: Good question.
Apheori (GM): Do it.
Frezak (GM): I think it might have been some kind of shock absorbtion material.
And there was too much.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+11
(
16
)
+11
=
27
Frezak (GM): And the cat suffocated.
Apheori (GM): Gan: It's magic sand.
MAGIC SAND.
Frezak (GM): MAGIC SAND
WHOOOO
Yeah yeah magic saaaand
Radek: Magical sand, here.
Ganelon: Can I...
Can I "dig" through it by disenchanting it?
Frezak (GM): HAH
Apheori (GM): Dude, you totally can.
Ganelon: YES!
Frezak (GM): DAMN YOU RADEK
Bear Soup Guy: ANTI-SAND
Radek: Would you like to see how a wizard digs, friend?
Radek grins wickedly.
Frezak (GM): FUCK YOU GAN
Ganelon: It's not bombs, I swear.
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Ganelon: So the cool thing about artificers is that I can do the disenchant ritual without expending components.
Meaning it doesn't take magic to break magic. For me.
Frezak (GM): So you take the magic from the sand. What about the sand?
It just.... vanishes?
Ganelon: "When you finish performing this ritual, you touch a magic item and destroy it, turning it into a quantity of residuum valued at (whatever fraction) of the item's price."
Frezak (GM): Huh.
So now you have a pile of magic?
Ganelon: All the matter disappears, leaving very useful magic dust behind.
Frezak (GM): residuuuuum
So you turn sand into dust.
GOOD JOB
Ganelon: Yeah, but a lot less dust.
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Ganelon: Also this'll take me an hour to do.
Frezak (GM): AN HOUR?
Ganelon: Yeah. You can shift it around with your shovel all you like in the meantime.
But regardless, it's turning to dust at the end.
Frezak (GM): This is exactly the sort of crap Gravy gets paid NOT TO DO.
Ganelon: Our lovely DM must also decide how much gold's worth of magic dust I get from this.
Frezak (GM): People don't pay for him to wave his hand and make a hole.
They expect WORK.
Ganelon: Keeping in mind that I can actually enchant stuff with that much to make... better stuff.
Frezak (GM): EFFORT.
How much do you have right now?
Ganelon: (Basically residuum is as good as gold for us. I turn it into magic items or do rituals with it)
Apheori (GM): Perhaps this would be a good time to call it a session.
Ganelon: Sure.
Apheori (GM): And we can sort out the amount then.
Ganelon: I have very little. 37 worth.
Apheori (GM): And Gravy can throw a fit in the meantime.
Frezak (GM): He's very upset.
Ganelon: Ah, don't worry.
Frezak (GM): He's gonna bury the cat bones.
Or possibly bury Radek in magic sand.
Ganelon: Later I can be like "Look, I'm sorry for pushing into your territory like that, but if it makes you feel any better, I enchanted your shovel."
"It obliterates foliage on command."
"So you can get straight to the dirt."
Frezak (GM): Hah!
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Ganelon: That actually is a real weapon enchantment.
Frezak (GM): Exfoliator!
For Topiary Spiders.
Ganelon: Huge bonuses against plant-like monsters and some power to destroy tall grass and... plants, I guess.
Bear Soup Guy: O_O
Apheori (GM): Poor Greibel.
Bear Soup Guy: Aw
Poor tummy
I need to make some food
Frezak (GM): It's powerful leverage.
DO WHAT I SAY OR I OBLITERATE ALL WEED WITHIN A 3X3 RADIUS.
Apheori (GM): Well, I need to go get dressed.
Ganelon: It would be an amusing, if expensive, way for Radek to show his distaste for nature.
Apheori (GM): Eek.
Ganelon: Yep. Ask Frezak or I about... loot stuff.
When it's convenient.
Apheori (GM): Good.
Frezak (GM): OR
Apheori (GM): I will.
Frezak (GM): Just give us TONS of magic dust.
Apheori (GM): Tons of sand didn't even come out.
At least I doubt it. I don't know the density of sand.
Ganelon: Well, magic density is different from matter density.
Apheori (GM): MATTER DENSITY IS IMPORTANT.
Ganelon: A +6 dagger is...
Bear Soup Guy: Does magic /have/ density?
Apheori (GM): You can only attach so much magic to an amount ofm ater.
Matter.
Otherwise it's not attached.
And it wanders off randomly.
And nobody likes that.
Ganelon: A +6 dagger contains, no joke, the same amount of magic as 3125 +1 daggers.
D&D is crazy like that.
Apheori (GM): Very.
But it's still attached.
Ganelon: Mind you, if you're using +6 weapons, you're getting close to fighting gods.
Apheori (GM): Depends on the gods.
Some of them you could probably take down with a brick, here...
Ganelon: I dunno, I've had trouble with brick attacks in the past.
Bear Soup Guy: Okay well
I am make good
food*
Bye guys!
Ganelon: See ya!
Apheori (GM): Right, toodles.
See yas.
Ganelon: Just catch me on skype at some point and I'll quote you the DM guide's idea of loot distribution.
It's actually not that complicated.
That said, this isn't a normal campaign so I don't expect us to be following it closely anyways.
Frezak (GM): it's in the Dungeon master's Guide
Ganelon: It's probably easier to ask me.

Session 11

Apheori (GM): HI.
Ganelon: Hello.
Apheori (GM): YOU ALL ARE IN A VACANT LOT. RHU DISAPPEARED, GRAVY DUG A HOLE, AND YOU FOUND A CONE.
What am I missing?
Gaurav: ... an ice-cream cone?
Finally, some treasure.
Apheori (GM): Strange dark sand and a cat skeleton were in the cone, and Radek is now disenchanting it.
Also Rhu just fell out of the air behind Greibel.
Ganelon: Well, I'm disenchanting the sand.
Rhu falls out of the air and lands flat on his face
Ganelon: The cone was from an old, old rocket.
Gaurav: Is this vacant lot sandy or soily or grassy or dusty? I forget.
Apheori (GM): There is a winged cat sitting on Rhu.
It's grassy and dusty and has some random junk and weeds.
Ellemerr: Oooh. That's probably my cue to NOT come on.
Apheori (GM): You don't like winged cats?
Ellemerr: I love winged cats.
Apheori (GM): Good!
Wait...
Oh, whatever. Do whatever you feel like.
Ellemerr: I will.
Gaurav: It's worth mentioning that the winged cat is, like, 2-3 ft tall at the shoulder. This isn't an adorable little furball.
(From Ellemerr): Unless you have something that I *ought* to do. For plot or whatnot.
Rhu: Oof.
(From Ellemerr): If I do come on, though, I assume either the Cat or I will notice one another. Or both.
(From Ellemerr): Recognize. I mean.
Greibel looks around
Greibel: Guys! I found the winged cat!
(To Ellemerr): Cat probably won't. It's not terribly smart, or at least not very aware. You might, but... you can do whatever.
Radek: Shut up and let me work.
(To Ellemerr): Basically it just followed Rhu out of the City of Death.
(From Ellemerr): Well, damn. Poor Rhu.
Gaurav: Would it be possible to put the cone down on the map? I'd like to see where Greibel is relative to Radek and Gravy in the hole and me on my face.
(To Ellemerr): Wait, was there a winged cat earlier? Why did he say 'the'?
(To Ellemerr): Oh crap. >.>
Ganelon: Spatial relations?
You've just gotta use your spatial imaginations, man.
Apheori (GM): Something like that.
Gaurav: Thanks!
Apheori (GM): Maybe not so far away.
Basically Greibel was just off to the side.
Rhu opens one eye, sees Greibel.
Rhu blinks, then closes his eyes again and rests his weary head on the ground for a moment.
Greibel waves at Rhu
Rhu: (eyes still closed, to Greibel) ... so on the plus side, Hazz'ridan says he'll help us find a solution to this hole trouble we're having. On the minus side, I don't think he knows how.
(To Rhu): The world crashed back. All the exhaustion, the confusion, the time spent outside of time sits on your butt like the weight of the world.
(To Rhu): Wait, no, that's a cat.
(From Rhu): A sphinx! Waaaaaaay cooler.
(From Rhu): and unfortunately heavier
Rhu opens his eyes an inch again
Ganelon: Given how rituals generally involve concentrated chanting, don't expect any contribution until Radek gets done.
Apheori (GM): Don't insult Hazz!
Rhu: (to Greibel) Well, you're still there. That's progress, I guess.
Apheori (GM): Or do, but...
Apheori (GM) starts cackling.
Greibel: Hazz sounds a little confused for a God
Amadi: Psh. Not hardly.
Amadi rolls her eyes at Griebel and yawns.
Rhu looks at Greibel, wondering if it's worth engaging with him on the off chance that he turns into a tentacle.
Gaurav: So where's Amadi relative to us?
Apheori (GM): I'd say floating three feet in the air...
Ellemerr: YES
Behind you.
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Ellemerr: Three feet behind. And three up.
Gaurav: oh good. Rhu doesn't see her yet.
Rhu starts to rise, which is when he notices that a large winged cat is sitting on his butt
Rhu: (to cat) Excuse me.
(To Ellemerr): Also for Amadi, Hazz is very large, and in many places, like a big mass with tentacles sticking into different universes. She needn't say anything about that, but just for reference in case I never mentioned it.
A sphinx: Storiessss.
Greibel: Huh...
Ganelon: "Excuse me" has never once in all of recorded history been enough to move a cat from its resting position, has it?
Apheori (GM): The cat's a sphinx.
Rhu: I'd say you're getting to live out a pretty exciting story, but I'll be glad to tell you another one if you'll ... *makes a get-off-my-butt motion*
Apheori (GM): Right, never.
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Gaurav: Not when they're sleepy, but an awake cat is glad to be politely asked for things.
The sphinx moves up Rhu's back and settles on his head.
Rhu: ...
Ganelon: Yeah, this is an accurate depiction of a cat for sure.
Rhu tucks his feet under him, then reaches up to steady the sphinx while getting to his feet, cat and all.
Greibel claps in appreciation of Rhu's difficult task
The sphinx digs in its claws.
Rhu pauses midrise with a pained look on his face
Rhu continues standing up. He is now standing up with a sphinx balanced precariously with one foot on his shoulder and the rest on his head.
Apheori (GM): Gan: Finish whenever you feel like and roll something for me pretty please.
Rhu: ... I don't suppose you're comfortable up there.
Amadi blinks a little, nods her head sleepily and disappears again.
Apheori (GM): Greibel, Rhu: d20s please
Rhu: (to Greibel) He's from the City of the Death. He followed me here. Can we keep him?
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
11
)
=
11
Rhu: Dead*
rolling d20
(
13
)
=
13
Greibel: No reason I should have a pet if you can't
Amadi: You don't - don't keep...
Ganelon: Something?
A d20?
Greibel nuzzles Rasputin
Apheori (GM): Sure.
Amadi yawns again. She's standing on solid ground this time.
Amadi: It keeps you.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
4
)
=
4
Daaaamn.
The sphinx jumps down and walks up to Amadi.
Greibel makes mock ghost noises and waves his arms around at Amadi's insinuation
Rhu heard that. He whirls around -- luckily, seconds after the sphinx jumped out -- and then looks at Amadi like he's never seen her before.
Rhu: You -- you were -- in the other place.
Apheori (GM): You got 372g worth of dust. If that's reasonable.
Ganelon: 'Tis.
Amadi: No no. That wasn't me.
Ganelon: Thank you.
Amadi shakes her head groggily.
Frezak (GM): What Sphinx?
The sphinx rubs against Amadi's legs.
Rhu squints as if he's trying to remember something
Gaurav: FREZAK!
Ellemerr: Rhu fell out of the sky with a sphinx.
Gaurav: hullo
Apheori (GM): Rhu just fell out of the sky with a sphinx on his butt.
Bah, too slow.
Gaurav: Apheori: you make him (her?) sound like a fashion accessory
Amadi gives the sphinx a reproachful look. "Why did you wake me? I liked that dream."
Frezak (GM): Gravy will shrug and get back to burying the cat bones.
Radek: Rocket's clear, guys- is that Rhu?
Rhu: Oh, hey, Radek. *waves*
The sphinx: Dreams are storieessss.
Amadi: No, it's Jem.
Oh, THAT guy.
No, that's not Rhu either.
Radek: I thought you were devoured. And possibly exploded.
Rhu: He needs a name. Unless he's a she. In which case she needs a name.
Amadi: This cheeky bastard woke me for breakfast!
The Gravedigger: You owe me some rope.
The sphinx hisses at Gravy.
Rhu: I fell onto a beach. Then things went weird for a long while. There was the bit with the tentacles, and then the city of the dead and ... Kyral? Kurul? Something?
Then she showed up *points at Amadi*
The sphinx: KYRULE!
The Gravedigger gives the sphinx a blank stare.
The sphinx cowers away.
Rhu snaps his finger
The sphinx hisses.
Rhu: That's the one. Thank you, sphinx. Do you have a name?
The sphinx: No namess.
Amadi scratches the spinx absent-mindedly behind the ears.
The sphinx: Names eaten. Devoured.
Rhu: (actually, make that "large cat", since Rhu doesn't know what he's called yet)
The Gravedigger: What a bout a title?
Nick-name?
Serial number?
Rhu: Devourer is a nice name for a cat.
The Gravedigger: Rank?
The sphinx: Sphinxess.
The Gravedigger: Devourer sounds a bit ominous, given all the holes.
The sphinx: They call us that. The devoured. The eaten.
Rhu: Sphinx is also a nice name for a cat.
The Gravedigger: If an eaten thing calls you something.... sounds like shit talking.
Ganelon: Do any of us know about sphinxes?
Frezak (GM): BADUM TSSSSH
The sphinx: And the storiesss. Gone.
Greibel: How about...Lardball ^_^
Rhu: Are you kidding, it's an adorable name! "Devourer". I wonder if he hunts mice.
Apheori (GM): Amadi might!
But... uh.. no.
Amadi: Yeah... I guess you must be hungry. 'Twas still not nice to wake me.
Frezak (GM): Wait, you got two breakfasts?
Rhu: (then, looking worried) Actually, the mysterious woman said they eat ... elves, I guess? So we should probably keep an eye on him ... or her?
Rhu attempts to determine if the sphinx is male or female
The sphinx: Eats stories.
Hungry.
Amadi nods.
Amadi: So very hungry.
Greibel: Does anybody know a good story?
Rhu:
rolling d20+7 nature check
(
12
)
+7
=
19
Apheori (GM): The sphinx appears to be genderless.
Rhu: Oh, right, you said. Hmm. Have you heard about the Great War?
Frezak (GM): THE GREAT WAR
Gaurav: Was that Gravy?
The sphinx: So many...
Frezak (GM): No, that was me.
The Gravedigger: I know some stories. If I tell one, do I get it back?
The sphinx: Back?
The Gravedigger: Because i'm not going to lose a story for some cat.
Greibel nudges Gravy "Tell a story you never liked in the first place."
The sphinx: No back. Never a back. Can't go back.
Amadi sits down just a few centimetres off the ground and picks up the sphinx to put it in her lap.
The Gravedigger: I don't remember any stories I didn't like.
That would be silly.
I remember the good ones.
The sphinx sticks its face in Amadi's face.
Radek: Once upon a time.
The sphinx whirls around and stares at Radek.
The Gravedigger: What.
Radek: A genius scientist invented something new, as part of one of his experiments.
The Gravedigger: There was a mummy diode and a daddy diode.
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Amadi rolls her eyes and pushes the cat's face away, taking up scratching its chin again. "Yeah yeah. Hungry," she mutters, slightly less sullen.
Gaurav: Damnit. Now I need to hear the story of the diodes.
The sphinx looks back between Radek and Gravy.
Radek: He had been speaking to a strange creature which called itself a sphinx, and claimed to eat stories, but had no way of telling if it was true.
So he invented one, and fed it to the sphinx.
The Gravedigger: The diodes wanted a baby.
Ganelon: Do I need to declare an end?
The Gravedigger: But they couldn't have one because they were diodes.
So they hatched a plan instead.
Ellemerr: Yes. When a story starts with "Once upon a time" it needs an end.
"The end." should suffice.
The sphinx hiss-barks at Radek.
Rhu meanwhile wanders over to the hole to see what is going on there.
Gaurav: Is the cat skeleton still visible?
Radek: The end.
Apheori (GM): Gravy buried it.
Frezak (GM): WITH GREAT SKILL
Gaurav: Phew.
Rhu examines the now-empty cone in the sand.
Rhu:
rolling d20+12 perception check on the cone
(
4
)
+12
=
16
The sphinx puts its ears back, then stares hungrily at Gravy.
The sphinx: Story.
Gaurav: Ellemerr: I thought "Once upon a time ..." needs to end with "... and he/they lived happily ever after"?
Apheori (GM): Rhu: It's an old metal cone. It was probably important. You don't know why.
The Gravedigger: I'm not going to tell the whole thing. You have to savour it.
Ellemerr: That is another good one, yeah.
Ganelon: Radek couldn't honestly claim that he would live happily ever after.
The sphinx hisses.
The Gravedigger: Just guzzling a story down is rude to the story.
Greibel: And you could get indigestion or stomach cramps.
The Gravedigger: Yeah.
That too.
The sphinx looks confuses, relaxes slightly, then curls up on Amadi's lap and starts licking a wing.
Frezak (GM): IT WORKED.
HOW DID THAT WORK.
I THOUGHT I WAS GOING TO FIGHT A FLYING CAT
Radek: I thought cats were supposed to be capable of fending for themselves.
The Gravedigger: Maybe winged talking cats are different?
Amadi looks up at the others. "You know you have to keep doing this regularly, right? Or it might start actually eating elves. Or it'll just keep dragging me out of my dreams, and you wouldn't like THAT, either."
Radek: Who ever heard of one that needs to convince us to tell it stories?
Greibel: Wait a minute.
All we need is some books on tape
Rhu: Literally indigestion is a lovely idea.
Apheori (GM): Sorry, Frezak. This cat is a bit... off.
Frezak (GM): Past it's sell-by date?
Rhu: I wonder if it can hunt stories? How would you stalk a tale?
The Gravedigger: Possibly with pens.
Rhu: (to Amadi) these dreams of yours ... they wouldn't involve ... tentacles, would they?
Er, I mean
Or beaches? Or sundresses?
The Gravedigger: Tentacles and sundresses? I thought you were a holy man.
Amadi: Or moons, or bunnies.
You talked with Hazz. I'm not telling you pennies.
Rhu: I ... it's a long story. And unfortunately, Devourer knows most of it, so we can't use it to feed him. Her. It.
(to Amadi) I am not familiar with that expression. How would you ... tell me pennies?
Amadi: Penny for a tale?
Rhu is confused, then checks for a penny
Frezak (GM): EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
Gaurav: ... which gives him a chance to see if all his items are there, and maybe see if another rock has mysteriously slipped into his pocket?
Frezak (GM): I'lllll tell you a tale for a penny.
One you cannot hear anywhere else!
No, not anywhere else.
Gaurav: Save it for Devourer!
Frezak (GM): I heard it from a birdy
It doesn't end purdy
It doesn't end well.
No.
It never ends well.
Ellemerr: Sorry. I should've anticipated this. :P
Frezak (GM): Sadly Gravy won't know that song :P
Ellemerr: anticipated.
... Is that right?
Frezak (GM): Yes?
Radek: Yes.
Ellemerr: Kay. Thanks.
Ganelon: OOC yes.
Apheori (GM): Rhu has the usual pile, a small tentacle stuck in one pocket, and that other rock the not Amadi gave him.
Rhu starts to throw the tentacle away, then thinks better of it and puts it back into his pocket.
Frezak (GM): Ew
Amadi: That wasn't me, you know. Nope. That was someone else. Someone later. Earlier? Someone. Not me at all.
Ganelon: I'd like to go check out this excavated rocket.
The sphinx: You.
Amadi: Nope. Not me.
Now shush.
The sphinx: Wasn't you.
Amadi rubs the sphinx's belly.
Apheori (GM): The rocket!
The Gravedigger: So... you learnt anything useful, Rhu?
Apheori (GM): It's full of jiggits.
Ganelon: Of what?
Rhu looks at Amadi suspiciously
Apheori (GM): Contraptiony thingies.
Ganelon: Oh.
Apheori (GM): Controls and jiggits.
Rhu: Oh? Er, nope. I have a feeling that it might be important, but, uh, I usually do, don't I.
Apheori (GM): Whatchamajiggits.
The Gravedigger: Dammit.
ONE DAY WE WILL MAKE PROGRESS.
Rhu: Do you want to take this cone with us? We could bring CAR and load it in. Why we would want to take it back to the hole or the commune is beyond me, though.
Amadi: One day you will bury the moon!
Ganelon: Well, in order of importance, can I find out:
- If there's anything sitting around down here other than controls and jiggits?
- What may be keeping the thing from being powered?
- Where/how empty the fuel supply is?
Rhu, it's big enough to climb inside.
Frezak (GM): I thought it was just the nose?
Rhu: Oh? (looks back at the cone) It looks so small from up here.
Frezak (GM): I thought it was cat-sized >.>
Ganelon: Am I wrong?
I thought this was a spacefaring vessel.
Apheori (GM): Yeah, it seems to just be the nose (a sort of landing module?)...
It's about big enough for one person, and there are some odds and ends, bit it's hard to tell what they are. Scraps of cloth (or worse, cat)? Controls that fell off? A coffee mug?
Ganelon: Undamaged!?
Frezak (GM): MAGIC MUG
Apheori (GM): So yeah, you could stuff Rhu in.
Apheori (GM): Roll a thing to tell power.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+10
(
4
)
+10
=
14
Apheori (GM): It's a it dented, rusted, and crap, but no obvious damage.
Ganelon: Bluh.
Rhu disapproves of being stuffed into a landing craft
Apheori (GM): You don't see any signs of the power source.
Ganelon: Aw. If it was a pristine coffee mug, I'd totes loot that.
Frezak (GM): But we found it pointing up, right?
Can we check the dirt for.... space dust?
To see whether it was snatched from space or a planet?
Because the former would be a very bad thing.
Ganelon: I want to get at the fuel supply. From the inside, that could probably be quite difficult.
But if there's fuel, well... fuel's combustible.
Apheori (GM): The mug is chipped.
Frezak (GM): NOOOOOO
THE MUUUUUUG
Apheori (GM): Frezak: ROLL A DIRT CHECK.
Ganelon: Actually, I can magic it whole.
So I WILL take the mug.
Frezak (GM): I'll turn on my badass power.
rolling 1D20+20
(
16
)
+20
=
36
X-RAY EYES ENGAAAAGE
Apheori (GM): And yeah, it's pointing up, and yeah, Radek would fit inside this.
Gaurav: "snatched from space or a planet"? If it's nose-up, it might be a landing craft with a heat shield on the lower side which was ejected before it landed.
Ganelon: Is thing small enough to pull out of the dirt completely?
Gaurav: We've pulled a zombie below under CAR. I think we can probably use it as a crane. Maybe.
Apheori (GM): Frezak: You discover that it WAS snatched. The sand that was in it was the remains of what it had been sitting in, presumably some vast desert of a sort you'd not seen before. It'd be very hard to dig in.
Gaurav: ... doesn't anybody here have lift-objects magic powers?
Ganelon: I don't have lifting powers, no.
Gaurav: Griebel could turn into a flock of ants and dig it out.
Frezak (GM): I have powers to make the earth roil.
The Gravedigger: This. Was desert sand.
Radek: Gravy, could you turn this thing around? I want to get at the back.
Frezak (GM): Can I?
Apheori (GM): How strong are you?
Frezak (GM): I have 18 str.
So....
Apheori (GM): You know what? Roll a thing.
Frezak (GM): I could break Arnie's arm.
rolling 1D20+5
(
1
)
+5
=
6
Str check.
GODDAM
WHY DO I ALWAYS FAIL STR
Apheori (GM): Ahahah.
Frezak (GM): My third Str check.
My third 1 on str.
Gorram.
Bear Soup Guy: noodle arms
Gaurav: Arnie the action figure?
Radek: Er...
Frezak (GM): Gravy is really perplexed.
Gaurav: The one recalled for having easily breakable arms?
Radek: Never mind.
Apheori (GM): Frezak: You fail to turn the thing and nearly impale your face on it.
Radek: Forget I asked.
Frezak (GM): Gravy just flaps his arms like that super amazing inflatable waving arm noddle man
Apheori (GM): In doing so, however, you notice something else - under the pattern of rust and stuff, the metal looks corroded, like with acid...
The Gravedigger: THe metal looks... melty.
Burnt. Eaten.
The porridge flops off Greibel's shoulder and bounces over to the sphinx.
Ganelon: I'll inspect the corrosion.
Apheori (GM): SCIENCE.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+10
(
15
)
+10
=
25
Greibel: I'll smoke a plant!
The sphinx stares down the porridge.
The porridge stares down the sphinx.
Amadi untangles the hand that isn't scratching the sphinx and reaches out to pet the porridge.
(To Amadi): When he smokes the plant, you feel kind of funny.
Gaurav: ... how does an eye-less porridge stare down a sphinx
Apheori (GM): IT JUST DOES.
Ganelon: It loses the stare-down.
That's how.
Bear Soup Guy: It wrinkles its porridge skin like eyebrows
Gaurav: Two eye-sized clumps of dry porridge appear on its surface, then move slowly together.
hahaha porridge eyebrows YES
Apheori (GM): Gan: The corrosion was done over quite some time, as though by plants or something else wrapping around it.
Frezak (GM): Oh dear.
Apheori (GM): Trying to eat it.
(From Amadi): Don't I always feel sort of funny?
Radek: This is corrosion, and it didn't happen all at once.
(To Amadi): Probably, but this is a different sort.
Bear Soup Guy: if I were any good at visual arts I'd totally draw the porridge staring at stuff
(To Amadi): For a moment.
(To Amadi): At least.
Radek: The plants in this area might be carnivorous.
(From Amadi): Riiiight xD
Greibel: That's unsettling
Frezak (GM): What about the acidic tentacles that ate my rope?
(To Amadi): >.>
The Gravedigger: What about the acidic tentacles that ate my rope?
Rhu glances at Radek, then does a double-take, then quickly inspects the plants in this vacant lot with a wary eye.
Greibel:
rolling 1d20 nature check some random plants
(
12
)
=
12
err
The Gravedigger: That's a point.
Greibel:
rolling 1d20+12 nature check some random plants
(
6
)
+12
=
18
The Gravedigger: WHy weren't you all melted, Rhu?
Amadi goes stiff for a moment (probably completely unnoticed), then suddenly dumps the sphinx and strides over to Greibel, staring intently on his... weed-thingy.
The porridge refuses to back down in light of the sphinx.
The porridge bounces away.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You find some useful herbs.
Rhu: (looking confused) I ... landed on a beach? I don't know. The water looked kind of icky.
Bear Soup Guy: heh heh
The Gravedigger: Hmm.
Rhu suddenly realizes something
Apheori (GM): Greibel: Nothing very dangerous unless you make a potion first, though.
If you even can, I dunno.
Gaurav: Hey, i forgot to ask: was the beach Rhu landed on similar enough to the one we saw through the hole using Radek's eye-robot?
Bear Soup Guy: Probably can't
The sphinx lands in an ungainly pile and swipes a pawful of claws at Amadi, then skulks off away from the porridge.
Rhu: (to Devourer) Hey! You okay?
The sphinx: Radek saw something tropical-like.
Apheori (GM): Er, wrong character.
Rhu: You did not see it.
Only Radek did, and he told you.
Gaurav: But Radek did actually see it? It wasn't just described to him by the robot?
Apheori (GM): Ask Radek.
Ganelon: Well, it's a magic robot.
Rhu: The beach I landed on ... you said there was a beach on the other side of the portal, right? Full of holes, you said?
Radek: Just one large hole.
Rhu: The portal through the hole in pool by the tree with the little tree on it.
Hmm. There weren't any holes on the beach I landed. What was the water like?
Ganelon: I don't think I specifically asked about that at the time. What was it like?
Apheori (GM): Blue and tropical and pretty-like.
Rhu: The sea I landed beside was black and oily. And strangely calm, like there weren't any waves on this sea.
Amadi looses interest in Greibel and turns away to look for the porridge.
Radek: It was unremarkable.
The sort of thing you might see on a vapid postcard. "Good tidings from the beach next to this horrid space-warping rift!"
"Wish you were here!"
Amadi: (over her shoulder) ... You should sell that one.
Rhu giggles
Apheori (GM): Amadi: You find the porridge on the sphinx. Apparently they worked out their differences and the sphinx is now wearing the porridge as a hat.
Rhu: Different beach, then. Still, all these beaches ... it's a pretty strange coincidence.
Amadi: Aaaw, look at you!
Radek: Maybe the universe is simply taking revenge upon carefree vacationers.
Gaurav: That is adorable.
Amadi smiles at the two and attempt scratching them both at once with one hand.
Bear Soup Guy: ^_^
Radek: If so, I could hardly blame it.
(To Amadi): Something I forgot to mention - or did I mention that? Either way, there's something weird about Greibel's hands.
Amadi picks up the sphinx again, this time draping it around her neck as a scarf. Then she walks over to the thingmagog everyone seems so interested in, and the discussion of beaches.
(To Amadi): A black cone... the focus of terrible energies... poured out on the blank sands, the black sands...
Radek: So, these holes. Would you say they were similar to what we've seen already?
(From Amadi): They're black, yes? I think I remember reading about black hands. From the porridge?
Rhu realizes he's forgotten something, sits down and prays to Hazz'ridan with thanks for bringing him back to what appears to be some form of relatively stable reality.
Amadi: A black cone... the focus of terrible energies... poured out on the blank sands, the black sands...
(To Amadi): Yeah.
(To Amadi): You don't need to repeat it. XD
(To Amadi): But you can, of course.
(From Amadi): It was really appropriate. I thought. Mind you, I'm probably mad.
(To Rhu): The universe is broken.
Rhu: (nods as if he understands what Amadi is saying) A cone is a symbol of Hazz'ridan. The pointed end symbolizing the dead end at the end of all paths.
(To Amadi): Heh.
Rhu: I read that on the inte--
Rhu frowns.
(To Amadi): Ahahahah.
(From Amadi): See, that's what I said. Appropriate.
Radek: Yeah, well this is the nose of an Artiilie spacecraft.
Rhu: Yes, it does look that way. Maybe that's should be our first goal? Try to figure out where these holes go? Maybe there's one planet somewhere with nice beaches and crap beaches that all the holes end up in.
Amadi: Hazz is a meany. Next time you see him, tell him he can't have them, not on my life.
Rhu: I don't suppose Sarathi have beaches?
has*
Apheori (GM): It has beaches.
The rest of you can probably guess that, at least.
Rhu looks at Amadi, then looks vaguely skywards, indicates Amadi, and shrugs.
Amadi narrows her eyes at Rhu and harrumphs.
(To Amadi): Have what, my lady?
(From Amadi): Hm? Oh, nothing. The china. I think. China? Is there still a China? I liked China.
(To Amadi): You're on.
(From Amadi): Oh, bugger. I think I forgot my lines...
Rhu: A sort of Central Station for holes. A final terminus.
The Gravedigger: Isn't that HERE?
The sphinx wanders off.
The Gravedigger: Since we're finding all kinds of holes to various places tied to here.
We're in the junkyard of the universe.
Radek: There could very well be more holes elsewhere.
Amadi attempts picking the porridge off the spinx's head as it rises from her neck.
Rhu: There's only one permanent hole here. The only other one we've found has been temporary. Oh, and the one we got here through, I guess.
Gaurav: I wonder if Rasputin has a sense of smell.
The sphinx falls off in a clump, having forgotten it hadn't been on the ground.
Bear Soup Guy: He probably has a cute crinkly faux-nose sometimes ^_^
Amadi: Use your wings, silly.
Gaurav: 18 cute crinkly noses! :-P
The sphinx looks up at Amadi, confused.
The sphinx: Wingss?
Amadi: Yes. Flapping. Flying. Like this.
Amadi attempts flying. Nothing happens.
Amadi frowns.
The sphinx: The ground hungerrss.
The sphinx takes an experimental flap regardless.
The porridge wrinkles a nose for no apparent reason.
Apheori (GM): Amadi: You realise you don't have wings. You also realise you COULD have winds and it'd be really easy to do. Then you realise you could have pretty much anything, including cake, if you wanted...
Amadi: I want cake. Does anyone else want cake?
Rhu nods
Radek: No.
Amadi: Awesome! Don't blame me if it tastes of blood.
Amadi makes cake.
Rhu: ...
Radek frowns intensely.
Rhu is suddenly not very hungry at all
Greibel: Is that like a blood pudding?
Frezak (GM): Is it chocolate? On a big glass plate?
(From Amadi): Did I just pick cake out of the blue?
Amadi: I don't know. You should try! What happened to your hands?
Apheori (GM): Amadi basically just pulled the cake out of the blue.
For clarification.
Amadi hands Greibel what appears to be cake.
Apheori (GM): Er, picked.
And pulled.
It's black and frosted.
Greibel: Hmmm
Works for me
Greibel takes a big bite out of the side of the cake
Apheori (GM): Greibel: d20
Amadi: [sings] One side will make you bigger~
[sings] And the other side...
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
7
)
=
7
The sphinx: Smaaaaall.
Greibel: Well, that's creepy.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: The cake is very sweet.
Frezak (GM): DEVILCAKE
Gaurav: We need to discuss taking food from spontaneously vanishing strangers with Greibel.
Ganelon: Yeah, he needs an intervention.
Rhu gets up
Amadi: I am not strange! I am -
Greibel: MMM!
Gaurav: Amadi: that was me, not Rhu! Rhu would never say such things, especially since he thinks Mrs. Teatime is pretty darn wise.
Amadi looks around confusedly, then mutters to herself (or possibly the porridge) "I'm perfectly normal."
Ellemerr: I'm perfectly aware.
The sphinx: The kind master. This one remembers. This one HUNGERSSS.
Ellemerr: She's saying this out of the blue.
Rhu: So we can't move the cone thing. I suppose in there, though. Should we go check out that note the strange woman handed Radek in the market?
Apheori (GM): Also you had that journal. In case you forgot. Which you apparently did.
The Gravedigger: Sure.
Gaurav: Ellemerr: damn. Amadi's one of those people who takes the glass out of the window pane on the fourth wall and then laughs when people walk into it, isn't she.
The porridge wiggles.
Ellemerr: Especially the laughing part, yes.
Gaurav: Rhu forgot about the journal, like, eight tentacles ago
(To Gaurav): She's not the only one.
Gaurav: But the stone-note thing is important.
Ellemerr: I sort of pity Rhu.
Rhu looks up at the sky and winks.
(To Gaurav): That was to you, not Rhu. >.<
Gaurav: Why? There's much to pity him for, but none of it's come up yet. He's reasonably happy. He seems particularly relaxed after the trip through the tentacles, actually. Not sure why.
Apheori (GM): Because he's an oblivious fruitcake?
Ganelon: That would be my next guess on where we're going next.
(From Gaurav): Oh, Amadi and Hazz are allowed to break the fourth wall but Rhu isn't? *winks*
Ellemerr: ... Now I want fruitcake.
I'm gonna produce fruitcake.
Apheori (GM): Also there's a guard standing in the entrance to the lot watching you. He doesn't seem to want to actually approach, though. He looks rather young.
Ellemerr: I HAVE MAGIC TOO
Rhu backs away from Amadi
Frezak (GM): I don't have much magic.
(To Gaurav): Rhu isn't a very powerful god. So... bno.
Frezak (GM): BUT I HAVE A SHOVEL.
Amadi: Now what! It's not like I had a lot of time to rehearse!
Amadi sighs.
(From Gaurav): ... yet. He's a young elf yet.
Gaurav: So: to the address on the note?
Frezak (GM): WHY NOT
Rhu: We should get a move on before ... (gestures vaguely at Devourer)
Gaurav: Gan? Greibel? Anything else you can think of doing in here? Whatever happened to all those nature checks Greibel was making?
Ganelon: I've got nothing else to do here.
Bear Soup Guy: I got USEFUL HERBS
Ellemerr: Moving on is probably wise.
Frezak (GM): ONWARDS
INTO THE FUTURE
Ellemerr: I have no mad knowledge to help at this point.
Frezak (GM): OR TEATIME
WHICHEVER COMES FIRST
Gaurav: I guess we leave the vacant lot and head towards the address on the note, taking care to remember where this particular vacant lot is?
Apheori (GM): The guard is blocking the entrance to the lot. He seems to want to say something, but is unable to actually form the words.
What do you do?
Frezak (GM): Wave cheerfully.
Gaurav: I think we're going to have to kill him.
It's the only way.
Frezak (GM): GIVE HIM DRUGS
Greibel thrusts a piece of cake in the guard's direction
Greibel: HAVE SOME CAKE
Gaurav: ...
Amadi: Yes, do. There's words in it. You need words, yes?
Apheori (GM): He stares at the cake, takes it fearfully, and runs away.
Rhu: Hey! That was our blood cake!
Frezak (GM): Ungrateful bastard.
Amadi: Huh. He must've been more starved than he looked.
Greibel: It's okay, teatime can always make more
Apheori (GM): He was terrified of you What do you expect? XD
Amadi: Yes... there tends to be cake for tea, doesn't it...
Greibel: Or biscuits!
Amadi: I hope the words will do him good.
Frezak (GM): Oh, wait. It IS time for tea.
Greibel rubs his stomach cheerfully
Amadi: It's time for war! It's time for blood! It's - what time is it?
Rhu checks his watch
The sphinx runs part of the way after the guard, then stops randomly in front of a random guy going about his business. The guy nearly trips over the sphinx, does a double take, and makes a wide arc around it.
Rhu:
rolling d20+12 perception check on my wrist watch
(
4
)
+12
=
16
The Gravedigger: TIME FOR TEA.
Rhu: Devourer is totally harmless, dude.
The Gravedigger: Any tea with that cake?
I'm parched.
Apheori (GM): You have a wrist watch?
Er... it says it's some random time.
Amadi: No. The china was stolen. Possibly China too. Do you know China?
Rhu: At least it's still working.
The Gravedigger: Can't you just have it in a... jug?
Amadi gives Gravy a disgusted look. "Would you dig a ditch with a fork?"
The Gravedigger: Well, I might start.
Rhu: We usually get our spaceship to make us tea ...
The Gravedigger: If the dirt needed loosening.
Bear Soup Guy: RIP SHIP
The Gravedigger: I have a pick somewhere for that.
Radek: I have a mug.
The Gravedigger: Aha!
Tea is still on the cards!
Amadi: You're all mad. When were you going, again?
Radek: Of course, it's meant for coffee and somewhat damaged, but I won't be needing one.
A passing philosopger runs past, screaming about 'holes for eyes'.
Gaurav: If we're going to drink something, we should go into a teahouse or bar or something, so we can have a random encounter.
The sphinx wanders through some other random passerby on the street, randomly grinning at them.
Amadi yells after the philosopher, "Tell them he's watching!"
Rhu: (to Amadi) Who's watching?
The Gravedigger: AND THAT HE WANTS MORE HATS
A passing philosopger screams, flails, and dives into a doorway.
Amadi: The... hat-guy, apparantly. I really did think you were supposed to be elsewhere then. It was in the script, I could swear.
Rhu: They should tied mattresses on all the walls in this town. I imagine a lot of philosophers end up splattered against walls.
Rhu looks at Amadi a little suspiciously
Gaurav: TO THE MYSTERIOUS ADDRESS?
Apheori (GM): A few folks do look up at this, and watch the guy until he disappears. "Mushrooms," you hear one say, shaking her head.
Amadi: I forgot my lines. It's not my fault. They should've given me more time.
Amadi starts walking in a direction.
The sphinx trots after her.
Rhu starts walking after them
Greibel follows suit
Ganelon: ...I'm not following the crazies.
Rhu: I'm pretty sure the address is this way.
The gate we came in from is this way, and I think it was a few streets off from the market? If we can get back to the main gate, we should be able to find the market easy.
Ganelon: You're following Amadi.
Ellemerr: And he thinks she's going the right way?
Or is he saying this to turn her around?
Or is he suddenly going another way, not caring where she goes?
Rhu stops, looking around, confused now.
Gaurav: Nah, he was saying it to Radek. But he really does think she's headed in the right direction.
Apheori (GM): As a reminder, Amadi has your pets.
Gaurav: This is also true.
Ganelon: She doesn't have my robots!
Ellemerr: [sings while walking]
When the men on the chessboard
Get up and tell you where to go
And you have just have some kind of mushroom
And your mind is movin' low...
Ganelon: I'm going to go ask for directions!
Ellemerr: Except Amadi does that too.
Rhu stops, turns around and follows Radek instead
Radek: Hmph. First sensible thing you've done all day.
Frezak (GM): I'm just going to plod behind Radek.
Ellemerr: Does Greibel keep following Amadi? This is very important.
Gaurav: he is pretty close to Rasputin. let us not split the party though.
Ellemerr: Aaaw, party-pooper...
Gaurav: on the other hand, i split the party last week and it was awesome
Ellemerr: Yeah, see? Solo adventures. They're great.
Greibel keeps following Amadi
Bear Soup Guy: Sorry, was afk for a minute
(From Ellemerr): The thing, of course, is that if it was anyone else following she would turn back because he has her key, but if he follows... So, what are your thoughts on party-splitting? I have no idea where Amadi's headed but I should go to bed in half or max a whole hour.
(To Ellemerr): I have no issue with it splitting so long as it doesn't get confusing.
Apheori (GM): Hmm.
Okay, so chrome-covered Radek asks someone for directions, huge-arse Gravedigger behind him, while Amadi and Greibel wander off.
Amadi is still singing about chess and pills and mushrooms and white rabbits and might not even notice that her tail detaches.
Ganelon: Yep!
Ellemerr: And Rhu also goes with the sense-party.
Gaurav: yup. he's going to regret this.
Greibel tries to harmonize non-word syllables with Amadi's singing
Ellemerr: Two mad people out and about! Whee!
All alone in the big city with nobody to keep them off the 'shrooms. :3
Bear Soup Guy: Muahahahaha
Gaurav: Twoooo madmen ... off, to see the world ... there's such, a lot of holes, to see ...
Apheori (GM): Radek: Who do you want to ask? There's close folks, there's other folks, there's guards...
Amadi: Greibel has shrooms.
Gaurav: btw: I'm at home dogwatching, so I'll need to leave a little earlier than I usually do. I probably have about an hour left here.
(From Ellemerr): You'll have to let me know if we get anywhere.
(To Ellemerr): It all depends on how long you have to wander...
Bear Soup Guy: Greibel /does/ have shrooms...
(From Ellemerr): Well, *I* have to go in shorter and shorter time, so if we want to get something mad done it has to be close enough for that... I guess. O_o
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Amadi, Greibel: You wander down a few streets. Nobody pays you all that much mind since you look fairly normal, even with the sphinx.
Ellemerr: I love that.
Apheori (GM): The sphinx grins at a lot of people. They mostly ignore it. Some grin back.
It seems to be very happy for some reason.
Amadi tells a lot of people to "Go ask Alice!" since that's the refrain of her song.
Gaurav: good for it. nobody likes a unhappy homicidal feline.
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Gaurav: soulicidal?
Apheori (GM): A lot of people give Amadi strange looks. One guy nods and says, "She'll know."
Ganelon: That's deep.
Amadi eventually finishes her song (playing the last instrumental bit very, very well on an air-guitar) and stops. Taking a few bows to nobody in particular, she eventually tells Greibel, "We're here."
Apheori (GM): You're in the temple district.
There are a few of them, and a few statues, and a few trees, and a few people standing around.
Frezak (GM): Bah.
Gods.
Greibel: Here looks pretty groovy
Gaurav: I dont suppose it is at all likely that this is coinidentally near the address the rest of he party is heading towards?
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Amadi: There's a thing. Do you go inside?
Amadi: Good songs lead good places. Shall we?
Greibel: We shall, m'lady
Amadi takes Greibel's arm and walks him inside.
Apheori (GM): Amadi, Griebel: It's a small building tucked away behind one of the temples - unassuming and pleasant with a lot of potted flowers by the door.
Amadi opens the door and you head inside, greeted by a room that is thoroughly dominated by a massive and vividly coloured rug on the floor.
Frezak (GM): THE RUG IS ALIIIIIVE
KILLLL IIIIIT
Bear Soup Guy: That rug really ties the room together
Frezak (GM): DEMON RUG
Apheori (GM): REST OF THE PARTY: Radek gets directions from a random passerby and you wind up heading toward the temple district as well, but when you get there you're not entirely sure what to do from there. Also a guard tries to stop you on the way there saying something about a fine, but you just go around himor something.
Frezak (GM): I just smile at him until he leaves.
Bear Soup Guy: I love these incompetent guards
Amadi: Yup. We are definitely... here.
Greibel: Okay. So what are we looking for?
Apheori (GM): A man holding a taped-up metal contraption stumbles out of another room, saying "I don't know what you expected, but this isn't actually quite..."
He trails off when he sees you. "Oh. Are you...?"
Amadi: I think you're looking for clues. About the Cataclysm or - yes. No. I was.
... Will be?
Apheori (GM): "No, no, this isn't," he says, and turns around and goes back into the other room.
Amadi waves a hand as if it doesn't matter.
Greibel: What a nice man
Amadi: Clues. Because all the holes are bad. They need patching. You think. He thinks. We'll see, I guess. I have holes.
Apheori (GM): This is basically a hallway, with a couple tables and odds and ends on them. There are three doorways - the one the guy came from, one with a sign that says 'perfectly ordinary basement' on it, and another that's unmarked.
Ganelon: Do we not have an address to a specific temple?
Apheori (GM): Gan: You have a specific address, but they didn't give you any specific indication of where that is within this area.
Gaurav: beware the leopard
Apheori (GM): Something about flowers, though.
You can search for flowers.
Gaurav: Gan: we could ask someone, I guess. Or just knock on doors.
Ganelon: Sure. Flowers sounds like a solid enough lead.
Greibel: Amadi, dear. Do you think anything suspicious might be happening in that perfectly ordinary basement?
Ganelon: I was going to complain loudly about this being some whack religion's attempt to get us to go to church, as it were.
But maybe it still is.
Amadi: Everything is suspicious. Do you want to go there? A lot of suspiciousness will be amassing there if we enter.
Greibel: Ah, so we're the suspicious ones?
Apheori (GM): Gan: Roll a d6.
Amadi: You are veeeery suspicious. I've got my hair on you.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d6
(
4
)
=
4
Amadi: C'mon.
Amadi opens the door to the basement.
Greibel: Glad to be of hair-holding service...
Greibel follows
Apheori (GM): Gan: You wind up in a garden with a well. Lots of flowers. Quite nice. Probably not what you were looking for, unless there's something about the well.
Gaurav: I would watch a TV show that's just Amadi and Greibel wandering around solving crime.
Frezak (GM): THE WELL
Ellemerr: TREACLE
Gaurav: They'd take about half a season to find the crime scene, but ever so entertaining.
Bear Soup Guy: Gaurav - I was just thinking the same thing XD
Ellemerr: AHAHAH
Apheori (GM): Amadi, Greibel: The stairway is dark and narrow and seems to go on for entirely too long, first straight, then curving.
Do either of you actually notice?
Ellemerr: Psh, this is Amadi. She wouldn't notice if she fell asleep in the middle of it. Tell me if it starts playing jazz, though.
Gaurav: BSG: did you just spell my name correctly? omg yay! It's always fun when that happens.
rolling d20+12 perception check the HECK out of that well
(
1
)
+12
=
13
...
Ellemerr: TREACLE
Bear Soup Guy: "DUHR WHAT IS WELL"
Ellemerr: Please please please find treacle :3
Apheori (GM): Gaurav: You fall in the well.
Bear Soup Guy: And yeah, Greibel is totally down with walking down an endless staircase
Apheori (GM): Gaurav: You also realise it's actually a secret entrance to something.
Ellemerr: At least the company is good!
Rhu: Hey, what's that thing over theeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
Rhu lands with a sickening thud
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Gaurav: how deep is it? is the entrance at the bottom?
Ellemerr: Now you're gonna drown in treacle :3
Bear Soup Guy: =D
Apheori (GM): Yeah, there's an entrance.
Amadi, Greibel: You come to a door.
It is large, menacing, and black.
Amadi opens the door.
Gaurav: Ellemerr: how would you draw treacle in a well? There's not enough light.
Ganelon: Is there a safe way down?
Rhu: Guys! There's -- oof -- an entrance down here.
Ellemerr: *squeeeeee*
Rhu rubs his head.
Greibel: Ominous black door. Nothing bad can come of this.
Apheori (GM): Amadi, Greibel: There's another huge rug on the floor inside. The sphinx runs inside and curls up in the middle of it.
Radek: Were you even looking for an entrance?
Amadi: I'm already bad for you, Killion. So are you.
Rhu: ... yes?
Yes. Of course. That's what I came down here for.
Greibel: Awww, that's what my mother used to tell me
Rhu: You, er, might want to lower a rope or something, it's pretty deep.
Amadi: She wasn't really your mum. She bought you from a man.
Gaurav: ...
Apheori (GM): Gravy: There's actually a ladder built into the side.
Amadi goes around the room.
Apheori (GM): OF the well.
Greibel: Oh...
The Gravedigger: Hey. Ladder.
Greibel starts looking around the room
Gaurav: well, this game actually got a whole lot darker.
Ellemerr: *cackles*
Rhu: What ladder?
Ellemerr: Sorry, I didn't play WoD yesterday.
The Gravedigger picks up Rhu and points him at the ladder.
Bear Soup Guy: Shhhhh, we're genre-bending!
Gaurav: Ellemerr: WoD?
Rhu: Oh. Yes. That one. The ladder ladder.
Bear Soup Guy: World of DEATH
Ellemerr: World of Darkness. I DM a thingy. It's dark. I must be trying to get it out here instead.
Rhu: I knew that.
Apheori (GM): Amadi, Greibel: It seems to be a sort of underground hideout, a series of rooms and passageways with blue magelights affixed to the ceiling.
Frezak (GM): NOW GO FORTH
Apheori (GM): There are a couple passages from where you are.
Frezak (GM): AND BE BRAVE
Rhu: Ellemerr: oooh, sounds interesting!
Gaurav: err, sorry
Bear Soup Guy: Reminds me of home.
Well, the most recent one I had anyway.
Amadi: Pretty blue light... Little Will'o's. This place is... nice.
Radek climbs down the ladder.
Frezak (GM): Gravy will go last.
Possibly once the other guys are clear.
Apheori (GM): Roll a thing to see if Gravy fits. >.>
Amadi: Are you coming, Chess?
Apheori (GM): Radek, Rhu: The door at the bottom is locked.
The sphinx gets up slowly, relishing the space.
The sphinx: Stories here. Old. Hungry.
Amadi: Yes. So very hungry.
Greibel: Should we feed it before it starts eating us?
Ganelon: Would you believe I'm actually trained in thievery?
Gaurav: YAY!
Ganelon: No dexterity to make it any good, mind you, but it's an important skill for alchemy. Steady hands and all that.
Amadi: If it could it would probably have eaten me already... I'm very tasty.
Greibel: I can only assume so
Ganelon: So I'm going to roll to pick this lock.
Greibel covers his eyes and starts pointing at doors saying eenie-meenie-minee-moe
Greibel: That one!
Ganelon: Er, if this door is even locked in that manner. Is it?
Greibel: Shall we investigate?
Amadi nods. "Yes. That one."
Greibel opens the door
Bear Soup Guy: brb checking the mail
Amadi whistles to the sphinx.
The sphinx: Gan: Roll.
Apheori (GM): Oops.
Gaurav: Why would there be mail in an underground dungeon?
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+6
(
13
)
+6
=
19
Apheori (GM): Gan: Actually, can you just take 20 for this?
Ganelon: It takes quite a bit of in-world time, but that would be up to you, not me.
Ellemerr: Charming a lock for 20 mins? That's dedication. O_o
Apheori (GM): Well, you just failed to open it.
Ganelon: Alas!
Apheori (GM): Or you could just keep rolling until it works.
Ganelon: I probably would keep trying.
Sure.
Ellemerr: Or until you roll 1 and it gets hopelessly stuck.
Ganelon: 22
Huh, and I was even expecting to do a lot of these and used inline to save space.
Gaurav: How do you do inline?
Apheori (GM): Amadi, Greibel: The passage is full of fungi clinging to the walls, but it's not long. It leads to a shrine of sorts. A figure of a cat-headed woman sits on the table.
Also there are skulls all over the floor.
Ganelon: Double brackets "[[" and no /roll.
Apheori (GM): Mostly rodents, some not rodents.
Gaurav: 11
fancy! thanks!
(From Ellemerr): Statue of anyone familiar?
Apheori (GM): Gan: So you get the door open. Behind it... is another door.
(To Ellemerr): It's totally Bast.
(To Ellemerr): Except not.
Rhu: There's nothing quite as annoying as a path pretending to be a dead end. A fake dead end is a pretty rotten thing.
Greibel: What a charming little shrine.
(From Ellemerr): Well duh. Who would Amadi think of it as? :P
Amadi: Oh hey, it's you!
Amadi skips happily over to the statue and pats it on the head.
(To Ellemerr): Herself, her sister, someone named Fred, Yika, Ariasna, Alyre, or Enry.
Greibel: Is that, erm...
The cat woman?
Ganelon: This one had better not be locked.
Apheori (GM): It's locked.
Ganelon: Ffffrrgh
THUNDERING ARMOR
Amadi: Yes, no, I should really not be doing this. It's really... but then again, I always liked it, right? As did she. We? Me. Us. Yes. Or maybe we hated it. In which case this is even more fun! Take that, you. Hah.
Apheori (GM): o.O
Ganelon: [Implement Attack]
rolling 1d20+5+0
(
15
)
+5+0
=
20
Greibel: You have quite the way with words.
Frezak (GM): Since no-one has called up I'm going down the ladder to investigate.
Ganelon: Actually that's outdated and it should be +6.
I thought you climbed down with us already.
Amadi: Hm? Oh, words! You should give me words! Her. Words. Prayer! Do you have a hookah?
Apheori (GM): Frezak: Did you roll if you fit?
Frezak (GM): What?
No!
Greibel: I have a bong
Frezak (GM): First, what DO I roll?
Secondly, i'm seven feet tall, not seven ffet wide.
Apheori (GM): Gan: So that hits the door in some way or another and it comes open.
Gaurav: phew
Amadi looks uncommonly suspicious for a moment. "Yesssss... you do..."
Ganelon: It's basically just concussive force.
Apheori (GM): Frezak: Dexterity-related.
Greibel raises an eyebrow
Apheori (GM): Gan: Okay. The door came open.
Frezak (GM): oh dear.
rolling 1D20+1
(
16
)
+1
=
17
Gaurav: Frezak: I feel like squeezing in (and possibly breaking some of the well in the process) should be a strenght check, maybe athletics?
Apheori (GM): Yeah, alright, you fit. Not well, but well enough to go up or down without moving in any other way.
He had to get in at all.
That's totally dexterity.
The Gravedigger: YOU HAVE DOOR PROBLEMS?
Gaurav: mm, yeah, that makes sense
Ganelon: Is there a third locked door past this one?
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Radek: YES!
Amadi: Will you... pray, with the...?
The Gravedigger: GRAVY POWER
Amadi gives Greibel a hungry look.
Frezak (GM): I'm gonna charge with my horns.
The sphinx gives Amadi a hungry look.
Amadi makes a suspiciously cat-like hissing sound.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+10
(
14
)
+10
=
24
That's Goring Horns + Charge.
Gaurav: WOAH
nice
Apheori (GM): The third door falls off its hinges.
Greibel: Um...
Okay sure, let's pray
Apheori (GM): Radek: Perception.
Gaurav: go on, then. tell us about the fourth door.
Frezak (GM): The fourth door is made of LAVA
Apheori (GM): Also there's another door behind it. All the doors have been different styles, but this one is really different, like from another culture entirely.
Gaurav: hmmm
Rhu: hmmm
I wonder if this is some kind of mental or magic trick. Like Telestorian dolls.
Radek:
rolling 1d20+8
(
9
)
+8
=
17
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Radek: It's a frustrating one regardless.
Frezak (GM): Isn't it Rhu's turn to do a door?
Rhu:
rolling d20+12 perception check to see if the culture makes any kind of sense to me
(
2
)
+12
=
14
Apheori (GM): It's a door.
A bunch of doors.
Like someone collected random doors and used them for something weird because this is weird and you don't feel quite right.
Rhu: That door is many doors, you guys.
Radek: Great. Make it many splinters.
Rhu: RADIANT VENGEANCE
Apheori (GM): Greibel, Amadi: What's up?
Rhu:
rolling d20 + 5 vs reflex
(
4
)
+5
=
9
hmm
my vengeance was not very radiant
Apheori (GM): Rhu: Nothing happens.
Amadi nods vigorously and turns back to the statue. "This isn't going to hurt one bit. I promise." And then she disappears into thin air again.
Rhu: I'll just hit it with my maul?
Greibel: Huh...
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+3 vs AC
(
15
)
+3
=
18
Greibel: Disappearing into thin air sure seems like it would be pretty painful
Greibel scratches his head and looks around
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You put a dent in it.
Rhu: I'm not big on damage, most of my stuff is with giving penalties to enemies and suchlike.
Could one of you guys get this? Sorry.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: Perception check.
Frezak (GM): You want another Gravy charge?
Greibel:
rolling 1d20+10
(
20
)
+10
=
30
Bear Soup Guy: I KNOW EVERYTHING
Ellemerr: Man, you do O_o
Bear Soup Guy: THE SLIGHTEST FACIAL TICK BELIES YOUR ENTIRE SCHEME
Apheori (GM): I regret this.
Gaurav: hahahaha
nice roll, BSG
Ellemerr: Well now I have to stay and see what you learn.
Gaurav: I'm out of here in like 5 mins btw
Ellemerr: Yeah me too. As usual when Ama goes poof. :P
Apheori (GM): Greibel: The bones on the floor were offerings, hunted objects for the lady. The shrine itself is a live, the inside of something larger, but also outside of what you needed.
You entered the wrong door, but before that you entered the wrong door.
Finding the right door is pointless. You need to find the other wrong door. Other other.
The sphinx is staring at you.
Bear Soup Guy motions to the sphink and porridge
Bear Soup Guy: Come on, we have to find the wrong door!
The porridge moves back to Greibel's shoulder.
Bear Soup Guy: Err
IN CHARACTER
The sphinx: And the master?
She was here. Her shadow. Her part.
Heeeeere.
The sphinx paws at the ground.
Greibel: If I know Amadi she'll be meeting us again further on.
The sphinx: Not her.
Not...
The sphinx hisses and runs out the door.
Greibel: Oh, you mean...oh okay
Greibel follows the sphinx for a bit
Gaurav: okay, I gotta run now. Bus in two minutes! BYEEEEEEE
The sphinx: Right, let's call it a time.
Apheori (GM): Er, sorry.
Gaurav: have fun with the sphinx, Greibel! don't let Devourer eat you!
Bear Soup Guy: BYE RAVEY
Gaurav: see you everybody!
Ganelon: See ya.
(From Amadi): (to Spinx, if she has that power) *groans* Nooo, let us sleeep for a bit, won't you... We're not ready to... to... (But then again, maybe that's just in her dream-thing.)
(To Ellemerr): Totally can. Sphinx doesn't seem to understand, though.
(From Ellemerr): Well, nobody ever does.
(To Ellemerr): Heh.
Ellemerr: Good time-of-the-day, y'all. Sweet daydreams and nightmares.
Bear Soup Guy: Adios!
Frezak (GM): HAVE FUN PEOPLES
OR WILL BEAT YOU WITH SNAKES
Apheori (GM): Heh.
Sweet nightmares.
Ellemerr: ^____^
Apheori (GM): Next tuesday, then!
Bear Soup Guy: Next Tuesday!

Session 12

Apheori (GM): Hmm.
Frezak (GM): LET'S DO THIS, BITCHES
BURY SOME SHIT
Gaurav: Dig some holes.
This place not called Anvilium needs more holes.
Apheori (GM): Okay, guys. The three of you are standing before a door.
Ganelon: Aw yeah.
Frezak (GM): Dig a hole, dig a hole, dig a hole.
Apheori (GM): What do you do?
Ganelon: Open it.
Gaurav: If I recall, I failed spectacularly to open the last one.
Apheori (GM): Radek opens the door.
Frezak (GM): THE DOOR IS A MOUTH
YOU ARE DEVOURED
Apheori (GM): Nope, it's a door.
Frezak (GM): Damn.
Gaurav: The door has another slightly smaller door inside it.
Apheori (GM): Slightly dented. It doesn't open all the way.
Frezak (GM): I didn't touch this one.
Don't blame me;
When I slam a door it stays slammed.
Apheori (GM): It just looks black behind it.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+12 perception check to see if I can smell or see anything in the dark. Especially if I can ascertain whether this is a cool inviting dark or a horrid murky dark.
(
9
)
+12
=
21
Frezak (GM): We have science-lights, yes?
Bear Soup Guy: oh god shit
Apheori (GM): I assume so.
Bear Soup Guy: you people talk fast
Apheori (GM): Rob: Fortunately you don't need to worry about this because you're in some tunnel somewhere.
Frezak (GM): Someone who can have a hand free should point some light down there.
Apheori (GM): Following a sphinx.
Bear Soup Guy: Yes, excellent
Gaurav: Don't turn your back on it, Rob!
Frezak (GM): YOU ARE TOTALLY SAFE
Apheori (GM): Rhu: The air smells stale and dry, but colder than the air of the well.
Frezak (GM): DONT LET IT SEE YOU'RE AFRAID
liiiiight
Bear Soup Guy: :S
Apheori (GM): And Gravy smells something kind of chemical.
Frezak (GM): CHEMICAL?
Must be Greibel.
Sitting in the dark huffing paint thinner.
Chanting to his heather shit-gods.
Gaurav: In fact, don't be afraid. The first thing it'll do if it detects the slightest hint that you're in the least concerned is tear you limb from limb with its arms while roaring in rage.
Frezak: hahaha
Apheori (GM): You cast some light into the opening. The door looks like it just got a bit jammed on the frame and you could probably pry it open; behind it lies a well-excavated tunnel, lined evenly with carved wood.
Bear Soup Guy: "heather shit-gods" XD
Rhu: ... you know, there might be an easier way in to the address on the stone than creeping in through an underground tunnel.
Rhu shrugs
Frezak (GM): Carved wood? Decoratively?
The Gravedigger: But where would the fun be?
Apheori (GM): Somewhat. Patterned a bit.
The Gravedigger: Hey, this is fancy wood.
Radek: At home, sitting on my workbench.
The Gravedigger: You don't know what fun is, Radek.
A heart as cold as steeel
Or Aluminium.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You follow the sphinx into a large room. It looks like a lab of some sort, with some tables and stuff, and some large tank-like objects in the center.
Frezak (GM): We going onwards?
I'm sure it's a lair of woodworking gnomes made of money.
Ganelon: Onwards sounds good to me.
Rhu shrugs helplessly, clearly hesitant about crawling underground, but hey, we've come this far ...
Frezak (GM): ONWARDS
TO ADVENTURE
Rhu: I fear holes.
Greibel looks to the sphinx "Don't suppose you ever took a chemistry class"
Apheori (GM): Greibel: There are four tanks total - big enough to hold a large man, and three of them are indeed occupied. The sphinx curls up next to the nearest, which contains a woman - who looks suspiciously like Amadi, but not.
The sphinx hisses.
Bear Soup Guy: OH dear
Greibel just sort of stares around at the stuff in disbelief
The Gravedigger: Hey, you just popped out the last one.
Apheori (GM): The rest of you: Someone pries the door open and you head down the tunnel, bringing your lights with you. It's dark. Horribly dark.
Rhu: Ugh.
Apheori (GM): The patterns on the walls don't seem to makesense, curling in and about as though alive.
The Gravedigger: You know.
Maybe we should look for the back-door/emergency exit.
And skip the eldritch horror.
Rhu tries to keep as far from the walls as possible.
Apheori (GM): Do you continue?
Gaurav: We might as well. This should be interesting if horrifying.
Frezak (GM): Yeah.
We're brave!
Sort of!
Ish!
Apheori (GM): Heh.
Rhu mutters something darkly under his breath.
Ganelon: I'm stubborn
That's almost as good.
Bear Soup Guy: Brave or slightly dense :P
Apheori (GM): You come to a circular room at the end, empty aside from a slightly raised dais at the centre.
Frezak (GM): WHAT?
Rhu: BSG: haha, exactly.
Frezak (GM): I AM SUPER DENSE.
I CAN USE MY SKULL TO BREAK DOORS.
Hmmmmm.
PERCEPTION THE ROOM.
I SEEK TRAPS.
And activate my Gravy-vision.
Rhu: I warily approach the dais and try to work out if it has a religious purpose.
rolling 1d20+8 religion check
(
13
)
+8
=
21
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+20
(
11
)
+20
=
31
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You may or may not notice that on a couple of the desks are notes. You may also notice that the other two occupied tanks appear to contain a weird golem and a very fat elf.
Rhu: It's entirely unmarked. You have no idea.
Gravy: You notice some patterns around the base, as though intended to channel something. It might have some sort of functional purpose.
There are no traps.
Frezak (GM): I'll direct Radek at those.
Apheori (GM): Unless the entire room is a trap.
The Gravedigger: Radek! Channel... like... things.
Patterns!
PLease apply your vast intellect to them.
Greibel: (to the sphinx) Well...any thoughts?
Frezak (GM): None of my knowledge skills are of any use >.>
The sphinx looks at Greibel warily, then backs up slightly. "Thoughts?"
Gaurav: Are there any other exits from this circular room? Or is it a dead end?
Apheori (GM): Dead end.
Unless up is a way out, but it just fades into darkness above.
Greibel: Insights? Inquiries? Ham sandwiches?
The sphinx: This...
Rhu pokes and prods the walls for any secret entrances, ventilation shafts, or such like ways out.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+5 dungeoneering?
(
10
)
+5
=
15
The sphinx spins around and runs to the three in turn. "These. They're not real. Not here!"
Frezak (GM): Well, /I/ didn't see anything with twice that >.>
The sphinx: Do you see?
Ganelon: You want a Detect Magic?
Apheori (GM): Rhu: It's dark.
Frezak (GM): Or if the patterns mean anything to you.
Rhu: Those channels look like they might conduct something. You're .. mechanical. Ly inclined. Mechanically inclined. Maybe you can work out whta they do.
Ganelon: Okay!
rolling 1d20+11
(
4
)
+11
=
15
They are NOT circuit diagrams. Maybe.
Apheori (GM): They go around the entire dais. It may be some function of the dais itself, though you don't know what.
Frezak (GM): POUR DUST ON IT
DO SOMETHING MAGIC
We still ahve the note that led us here, right?
Was there anything else on it?
Rhu pokes various parts of the dais and the patterns, just in case.
Apheori (GM): Some bad poetry.
Radek: I can't make much sense of these.
Rhu puts the stone which came with the instructions to guide us here on top of the dais
Frezak (GM): Recount the poetry!
Oh, that.
THAT MIGHT NOT BE STUPID
Rhu shrugs in the dark
Apheori (GM): The shoulders in the sand on the repeats of the world...
There's a blisters of something memory...
Look at the characters whip thy bum...
Kumquats devouring mundial smiley-faces.
Rhu: Hey, that's the same poetry that was on the note that was given to me. The one which didn't have this address.
The Gravedigger: Huh.
Apheori (GM): That was the one with the address.
Wasn't it?
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Rhu: Oh yes, no, you're right. The one with the address.
Gaurav: <<“The larger note/letter thing appears to be a set of instructions, saying to be careful, don't stand out, don't get noticed, go to a place, and some bad poetry.“>>
... this must be the place.
Rhu recites the poetry from the note.
Apheori (GM): Radek, Gravy: It may or may not occur to you that this may not actually be the place because you got slightly lost.
Bear Soup Guy: by the way, Greibel has decided to go up to a desk and just start reading whatever notes he can find, but feel free to take your time on what I'm reading
Frezak (GM): We did?
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You go through some of the notes. They seem to be accounts of research, a lot of numbers, a request for funding. You don't really know what the point of any of it is, though, or who actually wrote any of it. The handwriting does strike you as rather good for some reason, however.
Greibel: Also the sphinx jumps up onto the desk and sits on them after a bit,.
Gaurav: A request for funding! ACADEMICS!
Apheori (GM): Frezak: You got to the area, and then had to take a guess or something. It might be right.
Bear Soup Guy: There's absolutely no way anyone would turn down a funding request for mad scientists experimenting on people in a laboratory!
Underground
Apheori (GM): IT also might have just been a random escape well for something else entirely.
Gaurav: An escape ... well?
With a dead end?
Radek: Is this really the right place?
Rhu: It is a dead end.
The Gravedigger: Well, there's SOMETHING here.
You don't put down squiggles for no reason.
Rhu: Well, Hazz'ridan the Magnificent. But apart from him.
Rhu sits down and sighs.
Rhu: At least it wasn't another hole, I guess.
Apheori (GM): Where do you sit down?
This may or may not be important.
Gaurav: Is the dais at sittable height? Otherwise, just on the floor by the wall. Somewhere dry.
I imagined it, like, 4ft high or so.
Apheori (GM): Naw, it's like a couple decimetres.
Gaurav: That's, like, 10-20 cms? That's more of a raised floor, isn't it?
Apheori (GM): It's like a step.
Gaurav: I'm saying "like" a lot. I apologize.
Huh. Is it in the center of the room or against a wall?
Apheori (GM): Center.
Gaurav: Is it circular like the room?
Ah okay.
Apheori (GM): Yes.
With squiggles around it.
Gaurav: Then Rhu sits behind it, on the floor, leaning against the wall.
Actually, he kind of squats.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Frezak (GM): HERIOCALLY
Gaurav: Despondently.
The sphinx licks itself in front of Greibel.
Gaurav: Where's Rasputin?
Apheori (GM): On Greibel, I think.
Rhu: Maybe that thing is a trapdoor or something? Maybe it can be opened somehow?
Bear Soup Guy: My god I just drank some HORRIBLY spoiled milk
Or tried to drink it...
Rhu walks up to the dais again and taps on it to see if he can hear an acho.
Frezak (GM): DONT
IT IS A BAD IDEA
Rhu stops
Bear Soup Guy: OH OKAY
Gaurav: oh you weren't talking to me, sorry
Rhu continues
Frezak (GM): Nah, squatting always helps.
Gravy will go squat next to Rhu in case it helps.
Apheori (GM): Rhu taps the dais. It seems to be stone. There's no echo.
Rhu: Gravy: can you try to move this stone? Maybe it's a heavy stone resting over an opening or something.
Apheori (GM): Radek: ARCANA
Radek:
rolling 1d20+11
(
17
)
+11
=
28
Ganelon: 'Bout time.
Gaurav: woof. nice roll.
Frezak (GM): Can I?
Apheori (GM): There's a resonance about the entire room, but it's concentrated about the dais. It definitely has a magical purpose.
Frezak (GM): MAGIC
Apheori (GM): Something about... phases.
Frezak (GM): Ohhhhhh
Radek: This room is a magical focus. It was built for a purpose.
I can't say what.
Apheori (GM): Radek is way more eloquent than I am.
Rhu: Hmm. How do you activate the magic?
I've tried reading poetry to it and that didn't help. Maybe it needs a magic-user?
Ganelon: I guess I could try just doing magic at the thing.
Apheori (GM): Put Gravy on it.
Frezak (GM): 'put' ?
Apheori (GM): I kid.
Greibel: Do you do anything about the sphinx that just sat on what you were reading?
Rhu tries running around the room, first clockwise, then counterclockwise.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: It feels kind of claustrophobic.
Radek: You realise it's probably a transporter of some sort.
Rhu: Ugh. I don't like little rooms like this.
Ganelon: Can I attempt to activate it?
Bear Soup Guy: I go to another desk and find other notes
Apheori (GM): Totally.
Ganelon: What'll that be, another Arcana?
Apheori (GM): Sure.
Greibel: These notes concern the nature of magic, and a lot of numbers and comparisons. The summaries seem to indicate considerable excitement, something about it being completely new.
Greibel: Then the sphinx follows you over and sits on these notes.
And then stares at you.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+11
(
6
)
+11
=
17
Gaurav: Considerable excitement ... something completely new ... yup, definitely academics trying to drum up a little more money.
Bear Soup Guy: EVIL academics!
Greibel pets the sphinx absent-mindedly, in the midst of a bout of confused thought
Apheori (GM): Radek: There's a flash of light over the dais. Nothing else really happens.
Rhu: Woah! That's new.
Do it again! Do it again!
The Gravedigger: Fancy.
Technically, I could crack all this stone if you want.
Frezak (GM): I can break the ground in a... 15X15 feet area.
Radek: I don't think this was meant to be powered by a person.
Rhu: What do you mean?
The Gravedigger: Moonlight?
Radek: The room collects energy, like... a solar panel, I suppose.
Rhu: ... from ... where? I don't see any light in here at all.
Radek: It's an example, Rhu.
Rhu: Oh.
Frezak (GM): Anyone have any idea how we'd see where the 'roof' ends?
Radek: Solar panels don't work at night. This place operates on phases.
Apheori (GM): Suddenly there's another flash of light, bigger, bouncing down through the shaft and gathering over the dais.
Frezak (GM): BACKPEDAL
Apheori (GM): Then it fades, as quickly as it came, revealing a small mouse.
On the dais.
Frezak (GM): really now.
Apheori (GM): The mouse squeaks and tries to run away.
Frezak (GM): Um.
Rhu: Let's see if he can find a way out.
Frezak (GM): What would you ask of us to try and grab a mouse?
Rhu steps over to the corridor we came in through to block its escape that way.
Apheori (GM): Dexterity-based, probably.
Frezak (GM): Curses!
Can I tell if it looked like a normal mouse?
Apheori (GM): Perception.
Gaurav: My DEX is +3, if that helps.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+10
(
13
)
+10
=
23
Apheori (GM): Rhu: Try to grab it, then,since it'll be going past your legs.
Rhu: AH!
Gaurav: Can I do an acrobatics check? That's dexterity based, and I'm trained in it.
Apheori (GM): Gravy: Normal mouse, rather dusty, and hungry-looking. Not starved, but not far from it either.
Gaurav: Or a nature check to do natury things to it.
Natural things.
The Gravedigger: Hey, mousie, mousie.
Frezak (GM): Can I use Nature to make soothing mouse-sounds?
Apheori (GM): Dexterity to grab.
Sure?
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+9
(
20
)
+9
=
29
YEAH
HERE, MOUSE.
TELL ME YOUR TALE.
Gaurav: oooooh
Bear Soup Guy imagines the sight of an enormous horned behemoth making squeaky noises
Apheori (GM): The mouse stops and looks really confused and frightened. And hungry.
Frezak (GM): Since we don't have Greibel I have to get my own vermin.
I will... produce some sandwich.
The Gravedigger: Here, poor little mousie.
have some lunch.
*skeek skeek skeek*
Apheori (GM): The mouse comes eagerly to the sandwich and nibbles enthusiastically.
Frezak (GM): I will very carefully pick it up and stroke it.
The Gravedigger: So, Radek. Try for a duck this time.
Radek: I didn't do that.
The Gravedigger: Or, ooh! A moose!
Oh.
The Gravedigger strokes Mr Mousie.
Gaurav: Aww.
Bear Soup Guy: brb bathroom
The Gravedigger: So where did he come from?
Frezak (GM): I have to use half of one finger to do this :P
Rhu: Up there, I think. *points*
Frezak (GM): Because little mouse and giant Gravy hands.
Gaurav: Hehe. Using the tiniest fingernail on your pinky finger which is half the size of the entire mouse. Or some such.
Apheori (GM): The mouse squeaks.
Radek: I can't say.
The Gravedigger: What is it, Mr Mousie?
Frezak (GM): I can add Rodent to my Languages, right?
Apheori (GM): Er...
>.>
No.
Sorry.
Frezak (GM): Awww.
In that case...
I'll hold him up to my ear and pretend to listen intently to him.
Gaurav:
rolling 1d20+12 perception check to see if I noticed anything while Mr. Mousie bounced down from the heavens in his bubble of light.
(
2
)
+12
=
14
Frezak (GM): He's clearly a level 4 Mouse Sorcerer.
Gaurav: Frezak: does he have little wizard robes? Because that would be PRECIOUS.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: Not really.
Frezak (GM): And a hat.
Must learn needlework.
YES
Apheori (GM): Radek: The dais seems to be the focus and centre. If you can activate that properly, the energy should then be reflected back to it and it should operate in reverse to go wherever the mouse came from... but you're not entirely sure how to do that.
Ganelon: So it *is* two-way?
Bear Soup Guy: We are truly a formidable party
Absorbed with a mouse and a cat
Apheori (GM): Seems to be.
Probably.
Rhu compares the patterns on the dais to the ones in the corridor.
Apheori (GM): Test it on the mouse.
Gaurav: I was missing Rasputin. I hope Mr. Mousie is a good substitute until we get Griebel back.
We can't experiment on a mouse! Aren't there any zombies around we could use instead?
Frezak (GM): Gan has a robot >.>
Well, RAdek.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: The patterns are oddly similar, though it may be a coincidence. The ones on the walls are clearly decorative, whereas these serve a purpose.
Rhu: Do you think there might be other ... energy rooms around this building somewhere?
Radek: Put the mouse back on the dais there and I can try to send it back.
Radek shrugs.
Gaurav: Can the robot (Frank?) investigate the ceiling that we can't see here?
Radek: I could also try to send you over, but there might be a mass limit, and I accept no responsibility for what happens to the rest.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: The sphinx falls asleep on the notes. Do you want to do anything, maybe examine the tanks, see what the stuff on the floor is, make something else up, I dunno?
Bear Soup Guy: what's on the floor?
The Gravedigger: You'd send away MR MOUSIE?
At least let him finish lunch!
Rhu: Interesting question about the mass limit. I wonder if this dais is big enough for an elf.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: There's a box of... artifacts? Some of them seem to have fallen out, including a book and a set of screwdrivers.
Rhu stands on the dais to check.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: insight.
The dais is about 1.5m across, for reference.
Bear Soup Guy: INSIGHT
Rhu steps off
Rhu: It's plenty big for an elf.
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20+10
(
5
)
+10
=
15
Apheori (GM): Rhu: How long were you on it?
Radek: Shall I begin, then?
Apheori (GM): Wait.
This is important.
Ganelon: Of course.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You think the box may contain things that belonged to the people in the tanks.
Or maybe not.
Some of it is kind of shiny, though.
There's some nice implements.
Gaurav: Rhu got on, waved his arms around to see if a large elf could fit entirely within the dais, maybe stepped around once or twice to get a sense of how big it really is ...
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Gaurav: did something happen? He doens't have a good reason to get off, apart from not standing on daises.
Apheori (GM): He never got the chance to step off, then.
Gaurav: Hehe, awesome.
Greibel feels weary about the prospect of taking the tank-people's things
Apheori (GM): Gravy, Radek: There's another bouncing thing of light, then Rhu is encased in it... before it all vanishes, Rhu included.
Rhu: It's plenty big for a--
Apheori (GM): Greibel: Also, are they still alive?
Rhu vanishes
Frezak (GM): Wheh. Break for Mr. Mousie.
Bear Soup Guy: Nature to check their vitals?
Radek: ...That also wasn't me.
But at least none of his parts were left behind!
Apheori (GM): Nature or perception, whichever's higher. Since you can't actually reach them.
The Gravedigger: That we can tell.
Crud.
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20+12
(
6
)
+12
=
18
The Gravedigger: I hope I fit in there.
WOuldn't not be great to leave my shoulders behind or something.
Gaurav: BSG: or you could shout really loud
Apheori (GM): And bang on it?
Gaurav: "This transporter has performed an illegal operation and will be terminated. Partially transported giants may be broken. You may keep both parts."
Frezak (GM): Gravy is only 7 feet >.>
Radek: I'm sure I could make you replacements.
Gaurav: How broad are his shoulders?
Radek: Now, go on. This is exciting.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: They're all suspended in some some sort of thick liquid, and connected to some... thingies. It glows a bit.
The golem thing appears to have never been alive, but that also means it probably isn't dead.
The fat elf appears to be dead and bloated a bit on top of that.
The Amadi look-alike... you can't tell. Or is it Amadi, just bleached by whatever she's in?
The Gravedigger: Um.
Bear Soup Guy: Oh I probably would have noticed that
The Gravedigger: I.... uh.
Radek: Come on, now!
Greibel taps lightly against the Amadi-person glass
The Gravedigger: You drive a hard bargain, sir.
Greibel: Hey. Hey. Wake up!
Frezak (GM): ONTO THE THING.
Apheori (GM): The sphinx must have just distracted you for a bit or something, then.
Frezak (GM): Making sure Mr Mousie is safe.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: Also nothing happens when you tap it.
Some bubbles rise.
Bear Soup Guy: I was hoping for horror movie sting music as she abruptly opens her eyes and starts gasping :P
Apheori (GM): Gravy: You stand on the thing. Nothing happens.
Gaurav: BSG: creepy!
Apheori (GM): Shush.
Gaurav is shushed.
The Gravedigger: Here, Radek. Hold Mr Mousie. It might only do one being at a time.
ANd be careful with him!
Greibel: Hrmmm
Ganelon: Sure, I'll hold the mouse.
And stroke him like a supervillain.
Frezak (GM): HAH
Bear Soup Guy: Does Greibel feel like he's in the right wrong room that he felt about before?
Ganelon: "No, Mr. Gravedigger, I expect you to DIE!"
Apheori (GM): BSG: Somewhat, but not nearly so much.
Gravy vanishes in a similar flash of light.
Ganelon: Now as much as I'd love to just exclaim "I'M FREE!" and run away into the sunset, I'm going to get onto the dais next.
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You don't think she's breathing.
Snrl.
k
Bear Soup Guy: I guess breathing would be difficult submerged in goo
Apheori (GM): Aye, but you never know if it's relevant.
Gaurav: Gan: you should send Mr. Mousie first, if it a one-person-at-a-time thing.
Bear Soup Guy: Are there any visible exhaust tubes or ports or ventilation or anything like that coming from the tanks?
Apheori (GM): There is some tubing into the ceiling.
Ganelon: Hrm...
Apheori (GM): And consoles on the sides of them.
Magic ones.
Ganelon: Well, I guess I don't REALLY want to become some hideous man/mouse hybrid.
Frezak (GM): Yet.
Ganelon: Fine, the mouse goes first.
Bear Soup Guy: huhm
Apheori (GM): The mouse sits there for a bit.
Ganelon: I prefer rat people.
Bear Soup Guy: Greibel sucks at magic and science, but perhaps insight for the readouts if they're legible?
if they have screens anyway
Apheori (GM): Go for it.
Mostly switches and some... graph-like things.
But hey, worth a try.
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20+10 insight to read the things
(
17
)
+10
=
27
Ganelon: I'll try to activate the teleporter of my own accord again.
If that's okay.
Apheori (GM): Go for it.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+11
(
12
)
+11
=
23
Apheori (GM): There's a much smaller flash of light and the mouse disapears.
It occurs to you that maybe the problem is it just needs to cool down.
Gravy being... kind of big.
Greibel: The switches seem to be on. The buttons are pretty colours. You don't know what the graphs are.
Ganelon: Alright, I'll take my turn.
Frezak (GM): He's big because he's full of love.
Also HP.
Bear Soup Guy: I'll go to the console on the elf's tank since he's already dead and start pressing buttons and throwing levers, hoping that one of them drains the tank
Apheori (GM): After a bit, Radek is teleported to the others.
Perception?
Ganelon: For who?
Apheori (GM): From the lot of ye. You're all in another room now.
Except Greibel.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+12 perception check
(
20
)
+12
=
32
Bear Soup Guy: SUPER SENSE
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+8
(
17
)
+8
=
25
Gaurav: I have all the perceptions
Apheori (GM): Rhu: Radek lost his chrome.
Ganelon: NNOOOOO
Apheori (GM): Radek: This room has all the actual controls for the teleporter. There's a door and a skeleton.
Gaurav: I'm really hoping Radek really has a Charlton Heston in Planet of the Apes meltdown over the lack of chrome.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You think the skeleton may attack you.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+10
(
6
)
+10
=
16
Rhu: Watch out!
Apheori (GM): Gravy: You're still huge.
Frezak (GM): I'm clearly looking for Mr Mousie.
Apheori (GM): Also the mouse came through dead.
You find it.
Dead.
On the floor.
Frezak (GM): Fuck you.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: d20
Frezak (GM): I'm done with this game;
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20
(
19
)
=
19
Apheori (GM): Blame Radek.
Bear Soup Guy: WOO!
Apheori (GM): He's the one who rushed things.
Ganelon: Hey, don't make me look like the bad guy.
It's not like I did it on purpose.
Frezak (GM): I go pick up and shake the artificer.
The Gravedigger: WHAT DID YOU DO TO MR MOUSIE
Apheori (GM): It could also have been the teleporter itself - for all you know it
s not entirely stable.
Also what's with the skeleton in the corner?
Bear Soup Guy: "YOU'VE INJURED MR. STOOLS!"
The Gravedigger: JUST HOLD HIM, I SAID
Rhu: Hey, hey!
Frezak (GM): Then I will drop radek.
Radek: I brought him here! And... my chrome is gone!
Frezak (GM): And go pick up Mr. Mousie.
Radek: MY CHROME IS GONE!
Frezak (GM): He will have the greatest burial.
Rhu: Guys, I do not like the look of that skeleton.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: After flipping some switches and pressing some buttons, the charts stop, the tank opens, and the guy collapses on the ground ins a wash of fluid that all goes into a drain around the base.
Rhu: It means us ill. Or malice. Or something sinister.
Apheori (GM): The fat elf guy also smells really bad.
Greibel coughs vigorously while making note of which lever/button did that
The Gravedigger: Go hit it with some holy stuff and see if it moves.
Greibel:
rolling 1d20+12 Nature on the liquid good stuff
(
20
)
+12
=
32
Rhu: Hmm.
Bear Soup Guy: I AM THE LIQUID GOO STUFF
Apheori (GM): Greibel: It's not natural. At all.
Bear Soup Guy: :(
Rhu channels divinity to perform an abjure undead spell at the skeleton.
Apheori (GM): Means it's magic and science.
Seems it was used to suspend them.
Ganelon: It comes from Science and Outer Space.
Frezak (GM): FAR REALM GOO?
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+5 wisdom vs will
(
7
)
+5
=
12
at the skeleton
Gaurav: It'll only be targeted if it is undead
And I'm within 5 squares
Bear Soup Guy: Suspend them as in suspended animation or as in suspended like not letting their feet touch the ground?
Apheori (GM): What are you doing to the skeleton?
Suspended animation!
Bear Soup Guy: WHEE!
Gaurav: It's an attack that works against undead creatures. I rolled a 12 vs will.
Apheori (GM): Oh.
It failed.
Frezak (GM): It's 4E Turn Undead for Avengers.
Apheori (GM): And now it's stirring.
Gaurav: It works even if it misses
But! It has to be undead.
Apheori (GM): It's undead.
Gaurav: YAY!
I HELPED
Apheori (GM): You're reasonably sure because now it's getting up.
Gaurav:
rolling 3d10+5 damage
(
10
+
6
+
9
)
+5
=
30
except
only half damage, because I missed
so 15
Frezak (GM): SERIOUSLY?
Encounter power?
Ganelon: ...Wow, they haaate undead.
Frezak (GM): That's MADNESS
Gaurav: Encounter! Yes!
Ganelon: Channel Divinity is always an encounter.
Gaurav: I'm a Striker. I'm terrible at hitting things, but when I do, they feel it.
Frezak (GM): Jesus.
Gaurav: Also: I pull the skeleton 1 square towards me.
Frezak (GM): That's a huge fuckin' number.
Apheori (GM): You now have a somewhat damaged skeleton staring at you confusedly with empty sockets.
Rhu: Er.
Hi?
Apheori (GM): The skeletons put its arms out and moves as though to embrace Rhu.
Frezak (GM): CHARRRRGE
Apheori (GM): You could roll initiative.
Or not. I have no idea.
Frezak (GM): If we're gonna fight, that would be a good idea.
Gaurav: Oops, that should have been 29, not 30. I added my half-level on by mistake. So: 14 damaage, not 15. Sorry.
How many squares away from Rhu is the skeleton?
Apheori (GM): Like... one or two.
It's not a big room and apparently you moved it toward you.
And it liiiikes you.
Gaurav: Eep. Yes, definitely time for initiative.
I JUST WANT TO BE FRIENDS SKELETON
rolling d20+3 initiative
(
4
)
+3
=
7
Apheori (GM): Crap, how do I make a skeleton?
Bear Soup Guy: Put a bunch of bones together =P
Gaurav: Draw a human bean but forget to put on skin or flesh.
Frezak (GM): use the token tab.
And look for Skeletons.
else I can drag a token onto here.
Gaurav: Damn, I should try out to the DM interface sometime. It sounds fancy.
WOAH
That is a cool skeleton
Bear Soup Guy: ACTION SKELETON
Gaurav: Dancin' Skeleton
Frezak (GM): 18
Gaurav: Where's the little initiative box thing we had last time?
Apheori (GM): Clock icon.
rolling 1d20 + 6
(
16
)
+6
=
22
Gaurav: We normal people don't get one of those
Frezak (GM): You peons.
Apheori (GM): Oh?
Gaurav: Damn, that skeleton is fast off the draw.
Frezak (GM): Only DMs can turn it on and off.
Gaurav: I suppose we're not trusted with such power.
Apheori (GM): Ah.
Frezak (GM): Wow, that dancing really helped him keep quick.
Gaurav: He's very limber.
Ganelon: Hey, why is mine 2?
Frezak (GM): Don't look at me.
Apheori (GM): What'd you roll?
Ganelon: I didn't.
Gaurav: That's from last time.
Apheori (GM): Then roll.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+1
(
20
)
+1
=
21
Sweet.
Gaurav: You just rolled a natural twenty and that skeleton STILL beat you to it.
Frezak (GM): Luck can only take you so far.
After that you need cash.
Or at least better stats.
Bear Soup Guy: Good idea
Ganelon: Too true.
Bear Soup Guy: BRIBE the skeleton
Gaurav: We should try talking to it. Maybe it just wants a hug.
Apheori (GM): So the skeleton moves toward Rhu...
...and makes a HUG ATTACK.
Gaurav: OH NO
Ganelon: Fearsome.
Frezak (GM): I TOLD YOU TO NOT WEAR THAT SHIRT
Apheori (GM): Could someone remind me how to do that, please? >.<
Frezak (GM): Do you have any stats for this thing?
Apheori (GM): Sort of!
Gaurav: We should tame it. That's what this party needs. A dancing skeleton.
Apheori (GM): What does +8 vs AC mean?
Bear Soup Guy: I could not agree more with Gaurav
Frezak (GM): It means your roll 1D20+8
Ganelon: It means roll a 1d20+8 and then compare that number to Rhu's AC.
Frezak (GM): And it hits if you beat Rhu's AC.
NO
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d2 + 8
(
1
)
+8
=
9
Frezak (GM): NO MORE PETS
Ganelon: If it's equal to or greater than Rhu's AC, you proceed to roll damage.
That's a 1d2.
Frezak (GM): THAT WAY LIES ONLY PAI- ooooh
Apheori (GM): It misses Rhu and falls on the floor.
Frezak (GM): D20 >.>
Apheori (GM): Oh.
Ganelon: Roll a 1d20.
Apheori (GM): Damn 0 key.
rolling 1d20 + 8
(
19
)
+8
=
27
Frezak (GM): HUGS
Gaurav: hehe
WAAAAAY over Rhu's AC
dead hit
can you describe this attack
Apheori (GM): It hugs Rhu. Rhu is now grabbed.
Gaurav: ...
Rhu: HUH.
Ganelon: Use, uh...
Gaurav: How about the net icon for a grab?
Ganelon: This one.
The grabby hand.
Bottom left.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d6 + 2
(
6
)
+2
=
8
It also does a whopping 8 damaage.
Gaurav: OUCH SKELETON YOUR BONY ARMS OUCH
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Apheori (GM): Pretty much.
Rhu: I'm down to 24 health. Bloodied at 16.
Frezak (GM): You're so fragile...
I have like, 42.
Apheori (GM): That's the end of its turn.
Gaurav: I am. I have no idea why I have all the pull-things-towards-me powers.
Frezak (GM): And about 140 HP worth of surges.
Gaurav: It still has a minor if it wants to shout at us or smoething.
Frezak (GM): Fortunately Radek is great here.
Apheori (GM): It just wanted to hug you.
Gaurav: Aw. That's adorable.
Rhu: THIS IS TERRIFYING GET ME OUT OF HERE
Ganelon: Yes, Radek is uniquely equipped to break up intimate moments.
The Gravedigger: It's trying to communicate!
Ganelon: I use Thundering Armor!
Gaurav: Okay, while you guys do other things I need to run out. I'll be back in five minutes -- no later!
... this thing isn't using me as a human shield, is it?
Apheori (GM): Also Greibel: Care to try out the other tanks? Or feed something to the porridge?
Ganelon: [Implement Attack]
rolling 1d20+5+1+0
(
14
)
+5+1+0
=
20
Apheori (GM): The sphinx is still asleep.
Yup.
Ganelon: This is against the skelly's... fortitude.
Apheori (GM): Would hit regardless.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d8+5
(
8
)
+5
=
13
Frezak (GM): blonnng
Ganelon: It is pushed 1 away from Rhu, and Rhu gets +1 AC until the end of my next turn.
Bear Soup Guy: I'm cool to wait for the battle to finish before making anymore explicit actions
Ganelon: Pushed out of grabbin' range.
Bear Soup Guy: Seems like it'd be a bit of a clusterfuck =)
Apheori (GM): This was to separate them?
Gaurav: am I no longer grabbed?
Ganelon: Yeah, and yeah.
Gaurav: Or do I go with it?
Ganelon: No, you stay where you are.
Apheori (GM): Then Rhu now has a skeleton arm.
Gaurav: Yay! Ungrabbed!
Ganelon: And put a shield thing on yourself.
Like this'n.
(Press a number key while your mouse is over an icon and it puts an icon with that number on it)
Gaurav: fancy! thanks!
Ganelon: That ends my turn.
Gaurav: is the dot over the skeleton for bloodied?
Ganelon: Probably yes.
Frezak (GM): Red dot of pain!
Gaurav: okay, I have an encounter power that lets anyone reroll one attack against this thing, so it _might_ make sense to delay until I can activate it
Frezak (GM): I don't do much damage.
Gaurav: but I think we can take this guy if it's bloodied in two turns
Apheori (GM): Right.
Frezak (GM): But, I can do this.
GORING CHARGE
rolling 1D20+10
(
11
)
+10
=
21
VS AC
Apheori (GM): Yup.
Ganelon: Well, we have him outnumbered three to one.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D6+4
(
2
)
+4
=
6
And he is proned.
And I Mark him.
Gaurav: .... how can a skeleton possibly be bloodied?
Frezak (GM): Marrowed.
Gaurav: Is that ... my blood?
Ganelon: It's just a blanket term for under half HP.
Gaurav: hahaha yes
Ganelon: Iron Golems can be bloodied.
Gaurav: marrow spewing everywhere
Ganelon: Ghosts can be bloodied.
You've gotta get creative with the how of it.
Frezak (GM): So he's proned, marked and my turn is otherwise over.
Gaurav: Cool.
Rhu will first mutter "You will pay for that hug, skeleton" as he utters an oath of enmity against the skeleton
Ganelon snickers quietly.
Frezak (GM): So what do you need to get your rerolls?
Gaurav: It's an immediate interrupt. If anybody attacks the skeleton, within 10 squares of me, you can roll a second attack roll and use either result. It's an encounter power though.
Apheori (GM): How do you do a save?
Ganelon: Just a d20.
Apheori (GM): Rhu's got a skeleton arm in his shirt. Save ends.
Ganelon: If it's 10 or higher, you save.
Apheori (GM): Unless he wants to explicitly fish it out. >.>
Frezak (GM): AT the end of his turn, he rolls 1D20 to see if he saves against.. arm.
Ganelon: There are bonuses and penalties, but most come from magic stuff or specific feats, of which he has none.
Gaurav: Should I do that at the start of my round or at the end?
Frezak (GM): End of turn.
Ganelon: End of your turn, always.
Gaurav: Oh, end, cool.
Okay, so that was my minor.
Frezak (GM): Gravy gets to make a save at the beginning.
Because he's full of life.
Gaurav: As my move, I'm going to run like a coward.
Frezak (GM): WHOO
I'm here to take the hits.
Gaurav: And as my major, Rhu is going to call down the Radiant Vengeance of Hazz'ridan upon this hapless skeleton.
Just to double-check: I add my half-level on attack rolls, but not damage rolls, right?
Frezak (GM): Yup.
Gaurav:
rolling 1d20+5 Wisdom vs Reflex
(
1
)
+5
=
6
ah
Frezak (GM): gorram!
Gaurav: no
Frezak (GM): You're clearly not upset enough to bring down vengeance.
Ganelon: Hazz isn't feeling it right now.
Gaurav: does something awful and embarrassing happen?
Ganelon: That's up to the DM!
Gaurav: Hazz'ridan feels for lonely skeletons
Bear Soup Guy: The hug disarmed him with charm
Apheori (GM): It just fails.
Roll your save.
Gaurav:
rolling d20 against skeletal arm
(
20
)
=
20
Frezak (GM): You have terrible priorities.
Gaurav: The skill with which I unhook the arm without nary a tear in my cloth armour is fabulous to behold
Apheori (GM): The arm falls out of your shirt without anything embarasing happening.
Gaurav: Or that :-P
okay, Rhu is done.
The Skeleton is now Rhu's Oath of Enmity target. I need to run off for a few minutes as indicated, but feel free to use his reroll ability ONCE as needed.
Apheori (GM): The skeleton tries to jump-hug Gravy with three limbs.
Frezak (GM): Ew.
Ganelon: I'm a terrible shot with a rifle, so it'll probably become relevant soon.
Even though my accuracy should be great.
Frezak (GM): The skeleton might want to stand before trying to hug me;
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 + 8 vs reflex
(
15
)
+8
=
23
Frezak (GM): Gorram.
Apheori (GM): Oh, it stands.
Yeah.
Then it hugs.
Frezak (GM): That's a hit.
Apheori (GM): Like HUUUG.
Frezak (GM): My reflex isn't great >.>
Apheori (GM):
rolling 2d6 + 8
(
4
+
3
)
+8
=
15
And its leg falls off.
Frezak (GM): Huh.
27/42
Bear Soup Guy: This is why skeletons are lousy long-term combatants and great cannon fodder
Apheori (GM): Oh, and you're grabbed.
Though...
Frezak (GM): That's cool.
I'm fine with being grabbed.
Apheori (GM): I'm starting to see why this would be a single-use move. >.>
Except single seems like a bit much too.
How do you even hug missing limbs
?
Frezak (GM): Magic.
Apheori (GM): Anyway, Radek.
Frezak (GM): Ghost skeleton limbs.
Ganelon: First thing I'm gonna do is toss Gravy a syringe.
Surge +2 without spending a surge, sir.
Gaurav: Back. Btw: we should avoid killing this skeleton. It'd be nice to have something to send through teleports instead of Mr. Mousie or me.
Frezak (GM): mmmm.
12 HP!
Ganelon: You want to non-lethally attack a skeleton?
I don't think it can fall unconscious.
Frezak (GM): I could just break all the limbs off.
Gaurav: I think it's headed in that direction anyway :-P
Just carry the head around. That would be efficient.
Or, like, random bones.
Ganelon: Well, I'll blast him off you for now.
[Implement Attack]
rolling 1d20+5+1+0
(
9
)
+5+1+0
=
15
Fortitude.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Its other leg falls off and winds up in Gravy's bag. But how much damage does it do?
Ganelon:
rolling 1d8+5
(
4
)
+5
=
9
That much.
Apheori (GM): Yeah, it's dead.
Frezak (GM): OF COURSE
IT'S A SKELETON
Ganelon: It's UNdead.
Gaurav: It's redead.
Apheori (GM): Dead undead.
Gaurav: Woohoo!
Frezak (GM): Skeletons are not known for holding a great amount of vitality.
Gaurav: And all it wanted was a hug.
Frezak (GM): I'll go seperate the head from the rest of the body.
Gaurav: Are we out of encounter?
Apheori (GM): Yeah.
Gaurav: Rhu spends a healing surge.
Frezak (GM): Wanna stab me, Gan?
Ganelon: Between you or Rhu?
Yeah, you'll make a better donor.
Gaurav: ... huh?
Apheori (GM): Stealing surges?
Ganelon: Okay, so my healing mechanic doesn't take up your healing surges when you use it.
Frezak (GM): Donating one.
13 left.
Gaurav: Oooh, fancy.
Ganelon: But it only recharges at the start of each day or when I steal a surge from someone.
So even though I'm healing Gravy, I could do it with your surges.
But he's got tons to spare.
And even if he starts to run out I can just start healing him with mine, or yours, or whoever else's.
Gaurav: Nice!
Frezak (GM): You couldn't handle my surges.
Ganelon: I could steal the life from a stray chicken and heal him with that, in theory.
Gaurav: ... or a mouse?
Ganelon: Yes.
Frezak (GM): Roll initiative.
Ganelon: But it wouldn't kill them unless they had no surges.
Frezak (GM): Rhu is getting a beating.
He's gonna taste shovel.
Apheori (GM): So Greibel...
Gaurav runs away
Apheori (GM): While they're beating each other up, what do you do?
Bear Soup Guy: right
okay so now I go over to the Amadi-lookalikes tank and flip the same lever that opened the other one
And just because of the eerieness of it all, I look to the sphinx for approval
Apheori (GM): The sphinx looks up to see what you're doing, and then runs over.
So you flip the switch and the glass or whatever it is rises and the fluid empties and the woman topples out.
You also realise she has wings, because they kind of splay out as well.
The sphinx starts licking her.
Bear Soup Guy: So I'm going to keep assuming nature is the right stat for checking people's life stuff since there's no medicine stat (other than heal which I'm also trained in)
Apheori (GM): Actually heal probably would be.
Especially if you can actually touch them.
Ganelon: Heal is more relevant unless you're just trying to tell what they are.
Bear Soup Guy: ah okay
Ganelon: Like "This is a huge pixie!" would be nature.
"This person is in a coma!" is Heal.
Bear Soup Guy: Cool
Bear Soup Guy mutters that they should call the stat "medicine" or something
Apheori (GM): Gravedigger, were you going to beat up Rhu?
No kidding.
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20+10 check on the person
(
20
)
+10
=
30
Apheori (GM): But that wouldn't fit fantasy land.
Oh hey@
Bear Soup Guy: DOCTOR GREIBEL AT YOUR SERVICE MA'AM
Frezak (GM): I'm going bet up Rhu in the Rave.
Gaurav: I should point out that I said that, not Rhu.
But if you want to beat him up, I could have him say that also.
He/me asked for it.
Frezak (GM): If Gravy had more damage, I'd make him kill Rhu to have vengeance on Rave :P
But he can't.
So I won't.
Gaurav: Hehe. I thought Rhu was a goner when the dais did the thing, so ... you might not have to wait long. He's VERY fragile.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: The woman is dead. But it seems to be a much milder condition for her than for the other guy - like she could probably get up at any point.
Technically dead, but not entirely.
Bear Soup Guy: "Nearly dead"
If only that creepy guy with the hair were here...
Apheori (GM): Not breathing or anything, but also not deteriorating.
No heartbeat and crap.
That.
Yes.
Bear Soup Guy: I guess I try to revive her?
Apheori (GM): Roll heal!
Bear Soup Guy: With...punching her in the chest and CPR
rolling 1d20+10 HEAL!
(
4
)
+10
=
14
Apheori (GM): It doesn't work.
Sorry.
Bear Soup Guy: bah
Shouldn't have done all those drugs in medical school
Apheori (GM): And now the sphinx is licking you.
Frezak (GM): I'm sure that's not to code.
Greibel turns to the sphinx
Frezak (GM): Sphinx dribble.
Greibel: You seem to know something about the mysterious behind-the-scenes action around here
Any advice for a would-be healer?
The sphinx cocks its head at Greibel.
The sphinx purrs, then says, "No stories."
Greibel: No! Look! She was alive before! She has plenty of stories!
She and that guy over there, they have a life-time of stories!
Gaurav: A purring sphinx sounds both adorable and terrifying.
Greibel: Work your arcane sphinx voodoo on them and give me some kind of clue as to what's going on in this crazy place! Why else are you here?!
Bear Soup Guy: Greibel is being dramatic now =P
The sphinx: Why?
Greibel: Yes, why?
The sphinx: No why.
Greibel: No why, oy (facepalm)
Apheori (GM): What do the rest of you do, then?
The sphinx: Soy sauce.
The sphinx hisses in the dead gal's face.
Greibel: ...Soy sauce. Right, right. Of /course/. Soy sauce!
Greibel starts pacing the room shouting incoherent sarcasms
Rhu examines the skeleton -- male? Female? Old? Young?
The sphinx goes back to licking the gal.
Frezak (GM): I'll seperate the head from the torso of the skellington and wait for Radek to tell me about the panel.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: Heal.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+12 perception check against skeleton
(
19
)
+12
=
31
Apheori (GM): Nope. Heal.
Gaurav: A heal check against the skeleton?
Apheori (GM): It's a medicine check!
Gaurav: Ah okay
change the +12 to +10 then
Apheori (GM): From perception you do gather that whatever killed it was sudden and actually quite recent - there will probably be others here as well.
Nope, roll another.
Gaurav: bah
Ganelon: There's a panel?
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+10 heal check against the skeleton
(
12
)
+10
=
22
Ganelon: I must have missed that. Tell me about it.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: Male, bad teeth, uncertain age.
Also you're not sure where the other leg went.
Frezak (GM): I thought the skellington was slumped over a console or something.
Gaurav: I once knew a man with a wooden leg named Smith.
Apheori (GM): Gan: The room contains a dais like in the other, a panel with some odd controls (buttons) and a chair, and a door out.
Bear Soup Guy: Really? What an odd thing to name a leg!
Apheori (GM): The guy was probably seated at the console when he died.
Ganelon: Ooh, so it's technological?
Apheori (GM): Arcana to find out.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+11
(
13
)
+11
=
24
Apheori (GM): It's definitely magical. Apparently someone made a control sort of interface so the non-magical could use it.
Minions or something.
Bear Soup Guy: bah, I forgot how to private message but hahahaha Mary Poppins
Gaurav: I'll need to split in another 20 mins or so.
Radek: This is surprisingly advanced, but the controls are simple.
It was made for a layman.
Rhu: Can you control where you go? Or does it just push you back and forth between the well-room and here?
Speaking of which, do we even know if we're on the same planet?
Rhu looks around for giant fish
Apheori (GM): Radek: It seems it can go several places - helpfully labelled 1, 2, and 4.
And another one 'out'.
Radek: Four destinations, including this one, and a fifth labeled "out".
The Gravedigger: No... cameras?
Rhu: I guess this must be #3 then?
Radek: No screens.
Gaurav: Is there any way out of this room? Doors, windows?
Apheori (GM): There's a door.
Also this room is lit, though the light is sitting on the floor underneath the wall socket. Glows blue.
Greibel: Roll acrobatics or something to not trip over the sphinx.
Bear Soup Guy: hoo boy
Apheori (GM): Because it just walked into your legs.
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20+0
(
17
)
+0
=
17
Apheori (GM): You trip over the sphinx, but manage to jump and land on your feet. The sphinx just stares at you.
Then it weaves around and sits in front of the tank with the golem.
Greibel mutters a foreign curse word under his breath
Gaurav: Which language?
Bear Soup Guy: Which is the most casually profane?
Apheori (GM): Whatever the kanai speak, probably.
Gaurav: In Singapore, people will sometimes cuss in an unrelated language for emphasis. All the best cusses are in Hokkien though.
Apheori (GM): Rhu, Radek, Gravy: What do you do?
Gaurav: No windows, right? So it's either the door or zap ourselves somewhere else.
Oh, which might be a convenient place to "send" Rhu if y'all are going t okeep on playing
Frezak (GM): Gravy doesn't know what to do.
he's just sort of.. waiting for an occasion to be useful to present itself.
Ganelon: Well, we could check the other places out, or go through the door.
Frezak (GM): Eh, start with dialogue.
We're only good at talking and killing.
Uh.
Rhu: I would like to figure out where we are, but ... it is kind of tempting to see where places #1, #2 and #4 are.
Frezak (GM): Wrong chat >.>
Bear Soup Guy: Yeah, none of us is good at talking =P
Rhu: Especially if we're pretty sure that we can always come back from one of these transporter things.
Gaurav: BSG: fact
Frezak (GM): Any cheap way to tell what's at the end of the teleport destinations?
Apheori (GM): Amadi is great.
Gaurav: Radek is pretty good
Apheori (GM): Send someone unimportant.
Ganelon: At talking, maybe, but not nicely
Gaurav: Or somebody who has to leave for class in 5-10 mins
Frezak (GM): Nicely!
Gaurav: Hypothetically
Frezak (GM): So you just die in 5 minutes anyways?
DONE DEAL
Ganelon: Well, we need info on where the thing leads.
Apheori (GM): Use your magic.
Ganelon: Okay.
rolling 1d20+11
(
19
)
+11
=
30
HMMM
Frezak (GM): fail!
Bear Soup Guy: lightning bolts shoot from Radek's hands
Apheori (GM): You examine the panel more carefully and follow the magic to discern what the things do.
Apparently buttons 1 and 2 are actually traps.
4 is the exit. You have no idea what out is.
Well, 4 is back the way you came.
Gaurav: Phew. Good save!
Frezak (GM): PRESS BUTTON 2
I BET IT'S A LIE
Radek: ...Ah, hold on. This is a trap.
The fourth location is where we arrived from.
Gaurav: Frezak: you're thinking of cake
Radek: The first and second would no doubt be excruciatingly painful to one of you.
Frezak (GM): No, pits of nutritious acid.
Radek: And I haven't a clue what "out" is.
Frezak (GM): ONWARDS TO MYSTERY
Rhu: There's no point going back to the cave. I think we should scout out where we are before we head ... out.
I like being in, having a building between me and the holes. I think that is a good thing to have.
The Gravedigger: With you there.
Radek: We can experiment later.
Rhu: So: out the door?
Radek: Yes.
Gaurav: Are you going to keep on playing? If so, now would be a good time to send Rhu to investigate "out" and he just doesn't come back until later.
Apheori (GM): But I didn't put Rhu in a tank.
Er... wait.
The dead fat guy could be Rhu!
Bear Soup Guy: Time travelling corpses!
Gaurav: Otherwise he can just tag along or something. His character sheet is still at: https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u/19429772/dnd-skype/Rhu.pdf
Frezak (GM): MADNESS
Gaurav: At least he'll be well-fed before being syrupted
Ganelon: Either one's fine by me.
Apheori (GM): Whatev.
Gaurav: Keep playing. See where you get to!
Frezak (GM): BRING BACK TALES FROM SYRUP LAND
Bear Soup Guy: This would be a decent stopping point. We'd all be thrust right into some action the next time.
Gaurav: Okay, in a stunning change for the better, I'm going to be only three minutes late to class instead of my usual five. Have fun times, whatever you guys decide, and let me know how it goes!!!!!!
Ganelon: Sure thing.
Gaurav: Thanks for a fun afternoon!
Bear Soup Guy: Bye Gaur!
Apheori (GM): So either Gravy and Radek head out and Rhu follows, or we stop now.
What will it be?
Ganelon: I could stand to stop.
Frezak (GM): What he said.
Unless BSG is hyped.
But then he can just keep doing sphinxy things.
Bear Soup Guy: I can wait a week to open the golem tank
Suspense!
Frezak (GM): SURPRISES
Apheori (GM): Excellent.
Ganelon: Actually yeah.
If he wants to do stuff on his end, he can totally go for it.
Bear Soup Guy: Nah some people are bugging me to do admin things on uncyc and I'm supposed to be recording a vocal track at some point today too
So it's a good stop time
Apheori (GM): Aiight.
Then I shall see you all next week and things will go better.
Yes.
Bear Soup Guy: I'll try to get more sleep next time!
Good game guys!

Session 13

Bear Soup Guy: Oh dear!
ROOM ON THE MAP
Frezak (GM): GONNA DIE
DIIIIE
This IS fancy.
Bear Soup Guy: It's very nice
I'm going to stay in there mucking about with corpses as long as possible
Frezak (GM): That sounds like a druid.
MUCKING ABOUT WITH SCIENCE CORPSES
Invoke some trees.
Bear Soup Guy: =D
Yes
Frezak (GM): some potted plants.
Spruce the place up.
With spruces.
Bear Soup Guy: I'll sprout a mighty oak
Frezak (GM): That sounds obscene.
Bear Soup Guy: Perhaps it is
I am alone after all
Aside from the cat
Frezak (GM): The cat won't judge.
Well, it will, but not if you start touching yourself.
It's about being FED
SATING IT'S UNENDING HUNGER
Bear Soup Guy: Perversions are stories, right?
Frezak (GM): Sure.
Everything is a story.
Hence the value of words.
Since if you can change a story, then you can change ANYHTING.
Or anything, even.
Bear Soup Guy: If you can change a story then I wonder if the aftertaste changes as well
Frezak (GM): Yeah.
It's time-travel, only without any dimensions;
Apheori (GM): Yes and no.
It was the aftertaste what killed Athyria.
Bear Soup Guy: RIP
Frezak (GM): Rest In Pie?
Revel In Pigeons?
Ellemerr: Is that black-clad thing the not-Amadi?
Frezak (GM): Rotate Ill Pants?
Who? Rhu?
Rhu is not Amadi.
Bear Soup Guy: Reverberate In Palistine
Frezak (GM): Palestine?
Bear Soup Guy: That one, sorry
Ellemerr: On the floor. With a gun. I can't see any wings. I'm very disappointed.
Bear Soup Guy: Oh, such a big gun
Frezak (GM): They're magic wings.
Bear Soup Guy: I thought it was wings
There's the wings
They're white, and all wet
Frezak (GM): It's a vocabulatic miscomprehension.
Ellemerr: There's a lot of corpses, ain't there?
Frezak (GM): What, you mean the skellingtons are wings?
You're insane.
Ellemerr: I'm going to fish now. I mean, do things. With fish. Yes.
Frezak (GM): Give the fish a wing?
So that they can shoot themselves?
As they see Greibel sprout a might oka?
*oak
Ellemerr: Okra, it was the okra!
Frezak (GM): LADY FINGERS
SNAKE HEADS
Greibel sprouts a mighty okra. It is delicious.
Frezak (GM): You're eating your own... fruit?
Your shoots.
Your sproutlings.
Apheori (GM): Yes, thatś the not amadi, and there are no wings because I couldn't find a dead person with wings.
Bear Soup Guy: Yes but that white thing along her back
It does look like wings crumpled up from the wetness
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Bear Soup Guy: Excellent
Apheori (GM): Agh, crap, sorry.
I had to make an icon.
On the off chance Amadi does what I expect she'll do.
Greibel: You were about to open the tank?
Frezak (GM): Farm telepathic space-shrimp?
Apheori (GM): No, she's already doing that.
Or was.
Frezak (GM): Gorram.
I never have original ideas.
DAMN YOU, WHORE.
Ellemerr: You think I have plans for doings? Or think you can predict them? O_o You have more faith in me than me. Or in you. Whichever.
I'm still fishing.
My fish is exploding! I have exploding fish!
Apheori (GM): Plans?
What are those?
Ellemerr: Please start the game whenever it's convinient.
Or convenient, even.
Frezak (GM): I can't remember what I was doing.
Apheori (GM): RADEK! RHU! GRAVEDIGGER!
Frezak (GM): Oh, teleporter room.
I WANT TO EXAMINE MR MOUSIE.
Ellemerr: Going outside.
Frezak (GM): I WANT TO KNOW WHY HE DIED.
Apheori (GM): You're in front of a corridor leaving the teleporter room.
Then examine him.
Roll nature or something. Is that right?
Frezak (GM): Um.
Heal, probably.
Ganelon: For a skelly?
Yeah, probably heal.
Frezak (GM): Nature would tell me he was a mousie.
Apheori (GM): For a mouse?
Frezak (GM): no, Mr Mousie.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+2
(
19
)
+2
=
21
Fuck yeah.
Apheori (GM): You examine the mouse and realise the mouse is lumpy where it shouldn't be. Like its organs got slightly... rearranged by weight.
(From Ellemerr): If the thing you've expected me to do is really awesome and I'm not doing it, you can always prod me. I'm mostly just going to eat fish and try to think about cars.
Bear Soup Guy: Sorry I'm back, went to put noodles on
Frezak (GM): Rearranged by weight?
What?
(To Ellemerr): I have no idea what you'll do. I just need you to show up and do something.
Apheori (GM): Frezak: The bottom of the mouse is much heavier than to top for some reason.
Frezak (GM): Um.
(From Ellemerr): Well I'm -probably- going to do THAT sooner or later. Unless I suddenly explode and rain down as sentient dust over Gravy instead. You never know.
Frezak (GM): I'll... prod him to see if there's... something inside him >.>
Ellemerr: Bottom as in tail?
Frezak (GM): Mouse butt is lumpy.
(To Ellemerr): You can't do that unless he's by Greibel.
Apheori (GM): Yes.
There are... hard things. But the bones are also not where they should be so they're probably bones.
Frezak (GM): Well, fuck it.
I'm not going to open up Mr Mousie.
I'll just be sad.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: Do you open the tank?
Heh.
(From Ellemerr): I know. I think I'm surprisingly aware of the rules binding me. Unless I'm not, of course.
Bear Soup Guy: Eventually I wander over and open the golem tank, yeh
(To Ellemerr): You seem at least as aware as I am. >.>
Apheori (GM): The thing spills out.
Did that work? Did it show up?
Ellemerr: Yes.
You're very fancy.
Apheori (GM): Wheeeee!
Ellemerr: The tank is still blue, though. Might wanna empty that.
Apheori (GM): Oh.
Right
Ellemerr: Very, very good.
Apheori (GM): .
Ellemerr: What's in the last tank? O_o
Apheori (GM): It was empty.
Bear Soup Guy: Oh dear, cool
Apheori (GM): AMADI! APPEAR!
Ellemerr: ... Gotcha.
Amadi furiously bangs her little fists against the glass of the last tank.
Frezak (GM): DONT
SHE IS EVIL
Greibel: There's nothing in that one
Frezak (GM): SHE WILL EAR YOUR CAULIFLOWER
Greibel kneels down to inspect the golem
Apheori (GM): Greibel: It looks like a warforged. But I have no idea what warforged look like. Neither do you.
>.>
Amadi gives Greibel a rude gesture and holds her breath.
Apheori (GM): Amadi: Did you just climb into or onto the ank?
Bear Soup Guy: I will imagine the War Doctor who was also forged in war
Clearly that is appropriate
Ellemerr: I wanted to appear in it.
It looked nice.
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Then I suppose Greibel was being quite oblivious at the moment
Apheori (GM): It spilled everywhere when you forced your way in.
Bear Soup Guy: He's had a stressful day
Apheori (GM): Good job.
Ellemerr: Well that's no fuun.
Apheori (GM): RAHB: I mean you've probably never seen one. A warforged. As a... species-type thing.
Bear Soup Guy: Oh, right!
Greibel will assume he looks like the war doctor =P
Ganelon: If only the Guru Man were here.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Now what?
Also the porridge feels oddly soggy.
Frezak (GM): OH GODS
Bear Soup Guy: He's had a stressful day too
Frezak (GM): THE PORRIDGE IS A WERE-FISH
Ellemerr: I'm going to stay in the tank. For now. With no liquid, I'm sure it's a nice tank.
Bear Soup Guy: Now I will inspect the golem! Maybe.
I guess nature's no good if I've never seen one.
Heal?
Frezak (GM): So.... do we take the exit destination portal thing?
Apheori (GM): Arcana.
...I guess.
Bear Soup Guy: ARCANA
Ganelon: Heh heh.
Bear Soup Guy: Oh boy, okay
Ganelon: Yessss
We have a door to take.
Gaurav: I hope we get to visit this room sometime, it is an awesome room.
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20+2 Desperate inspection of magics
(
10
)
+2
=
12
Ganelon: And a mysterious option on the controls that should be less dangerous than those two trapped ones.
Ellemerr: Wasn't that just back?
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You discern that there's magic involved.
Bear Soup Guy: YAY I LEARNED SOMETHING
Gaurav: "less dangerous"? I'm not convinced "out" in any way suggests a lack of danger. But i guess it's not obviously a trap, which is handy.
Frezak (GM): I thought it was: Back, Mystery, death, pain.
Gaurav: Did we try walking out the door and wandering around this place?
Frezak (GM): There was a door?
Apheori (GM): There's a door.
To a corridor.
Gaurav: That door.
Apheori (GM): There are also two buttons for the transporter.
Do something.
Ellemerr: You had sort of decided on the door last time.
Rhu: I vote for going out the normal door. I don't like machine things.
Gaurav: Ellemerr: that was last week. We are now older and wiser.
Rhu: Also, err ... should we take Mr. Mousie with us?
Ellemerr: So now you can take the door like old wise men rather than young adventurous types?
Radek: Can you raise the dead?
Amadi sits down in her tank and starts banging her knuckles experimentally against the inside, listening to the sound of it.
Frezak (GM): I have pocketed Mr.Mousie.
That he may have the burial he deserves.
Ganelon: I can try to fix him, you know.
The sphinx walks over and sits on the not Amadi's face.
Frezak (GM): I could bury you, you know.
Ganelon: DM: Right click, "To Back".
Apheori (GM): Oh.
Gaurav: oh oops sorry I forgot re: Mr. Mousie
Ganelon: I vote the door, too.
Amadi leans her head out of the tank and looks at the sphinx.
The sphinx grins at Amadi.
Apheori (GM): So you guys head out the door?
Gaurav: Should Gravy take the lead out the door? Him being big and all.
Ganelon: Yes.
We know there are skeletons.
He should be in front, smashing them.
Gaurav: They just want hugs.
If we could build some sort of hugginator, we should be fine.
Amadi: Do you think I'm dreaming about her, or that she's dreaming about me? Or are we all dreaming one another? Maybe it's all HER, too. But that's sort of the same. Isn't it?
The sphinx: Dreamsss.
Greibel: Well stated, my mysterious companion
Gaurav: Amadi: ooh, I like the new avatar!
Frezak (GM): I'll go open the door, then.
Greibel: Do you think you could learn anything from these various corpses I've littered the room with?
Rhu follows Gravy to the door
Amadi: I'm not telling you my dreams, you demanding thing. Don't eat the dead dreams, either. You'll get a stomach-ache again.
Amadi bangs her knuckles against the metal some more.
Amadi: I like this sound.
Apheori (GM): Gravy, Rhu: You see a corridor going off into the darkness, with a few green lights flickering at intervals.
Frezak (GM): Hmm.
Rhu: That looks safe.
Frezak (GM): How well can we see by these lights?
Rhu: In that reality itself isn't flickering on and off.
The sphinx arches its back slightly at the sound.
Apheori (GM): You can see, but not very... far?
Frezak (GM): Enough to navigate?
Apheori (GM): Yeah.
Frezak (GM): ONWARDS
Apheori (GM): There are some doors on either side.
Gaurav: We have torches as part of our Adventurer's Kit, I think.
Frezak (GM): DOORS
OPEN DOOR
yeah, but I don't have a free hand.
Apheori (GM): In this case the torches would be really torches, though.
Amadi finally ceases, turning her attention to Greibel. "Corpses. I'm great with corpses. When do you need it?"
Gaurav: Wait, let's perception check to see if we can hear anything.
Frezak (GM): Smart.
GRAVY SENSE! TINGLE!
Apheori (GM): As soon as Amadi stops, the sphinx gets up and starts crazy-jumping around for no aparrent reason.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+9+10+1
(
5
)
+9+10+1
=
25
Ganelon: Absolutely ridiculous.
Greibel eyes the sphinx
Apheori (GM): It looks a little something like this, and then runs into a desk. http://25.media.tumblr.com/d67e00c6db38870d4a4ea59e757fdb87/tumblr_mrsany0Umc1rsjozoo6_400.gif
Gaurav: We could also do some sort of strategic door opening in which I open the door while Gravy gets ready to charge through it. Or something.
(From Ellemerr): Do I have special sphinx-knowledge of any kind or something to roll about that?
Greibel: (To Amadi) Uhm....whenever it's convenient I suppose.
Apheori (GM): Gravy: You sense... DEATH.
Gaurav: WHAT ABOUT FISH
Apheori (GM): Also there's a bigger corridor ahead.
(To Ellemerr): I have NO idea.
Gaurav: Apheori: that is a quality cat GIF
(From Ellemerr): Beyond, you know, when I just do things and assume it to be okay.
Frezak (GM): Death?
Apheori (GM): DEEEEATH.
Frezak (GM): LIke... the smell of rotten things?
Or just.... Deeeeaaaath!
Apheori (GM): Kind of, except nothing's rotted.
The Gravedigger: Beyond this door... lies DEATH.
DEAAAATH
Radek: What, ours?
Are you trying to be spooky?
Rhu takes a step away from the door
Amadi sniffs the corpse of not-her and then gives the sphinx a suspicious, narrow-eyed look.
The Gravedigger: Don't be silly. We're alive.
Apheori (GM): So you're in front of a random corridor door about to open it?
Rhu: I suppose we should at least see what sort of death they have around in it.
around these parts*
Frezak (GM): Rhu, you want to open it while I stand in front?
Rhu: I'm hoping calm and peaceful, but I'll settle for terrible and ghastly as long as reality remains mostly stable
Gaurav: There aren't any windows in this corridor, right?
Ellemerr: It'd be cool if you suddenly met Death.
Apheori (GM): No windows. You seem to still be deep underground.
Gaurav: Does the corridor look like the one we walked through out of the well? Like, similar size, similar construction?
Frezak (GM): What, the carved wood thing?
Apheori (GM): Similar construction, but bigger.
Gaurav: And we don't obviously hear any sounds of, like, air pumps or anything, right?
Frezak (GM): MAGIC
Apheori (GM): The wood ain't carved the same, though. Now it's just geometric patterns.
Rhu walks up to the door and stands behind it, ready to open it when Gravy gives the signal.
Apheori (GM): You hear the odd... no, you don't hear anything.
Ellemerr: The odd sound of nothing.
Gaurav: Any distinctive smells?
Frezak (GM): YOU HEAR THE VOID
Spaaaaaace
Gaurav: Rhu's not smart enough to work this out, but being underground without any obvious ventilation system is probably pretty worrying
Anywho. I'm done investigating. Shall we go in this door?
Frezak (GM): Go for it.
Ganelon: I'm ready.
Frezak (GM): I'll stnad all be all invincible.
Rhu opens the door
Frezak (GM): BEHOLD, DEATH
Vashta Nerada!
Apheori (GM): It's dark.
You can't tell what's in it.
Gaurav: Definitely Vashta Narada.
Frezak (GM): Yeah.
Gaurav: Gravy: intimidate the darkness.
Frezak (GM): Luckily i'm so meaty, you'd have time to flee.
HAVE AT THEE, DARKNESS
Apheori (GM): Just shine your torches in or something. >.>
Ganelon: You would think that I might have some kind of light-producing thing on me.
The sphinx starts licking itself.
Frezak (GM): Yeah, someone point a torch.
Ganelon: You'd be wrong.
Rhu stays behind the door, giving Gravy and Radek "what's in there?" looks
The sphinx: You have a torch.
Frezak (GM): technically, a bomb makes light...
The sphinx: Er, ooc.
Ganelon: Also I think we all use two-handed weapons here.
Well, you have a shield.
Frezak (GM): Sure, but YOU can hold it one hand.
Apheori (GM): So tape a torch to it!
Frezak (GM): TAPE A TORCH TO MY HEAD.
Apheori (GM): This isn't Doom 3.
Rhu walks around the door and shines a light in
Gaurav: We could tape two torches to Gravy's horns
Frezak (GM): ANd scare deer!
Amadi snaps sharply at the sphinx, "If you've made your bed you will have to eat it." Then she tries to figure out stuff about the winged corpse-lady.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: It's full of shelves of boxes and papers. Looks like a storeroom of some kind.
The Gravedigger: DEATH
Ellemerr: I might need some sort of roll for that. I have no idea what. Or what I even want to find out.
Rhu: Huh.
Even worse: paperwork.
Can somebody check for traps before I step in here?
The Gravedigger: YES
Frezak (GM): I step into the room.
Ganelon: Sure, I'll try magic... traps.
Apheori (GM): You step on a corpse.
The Gravedigger: DEATH
Ganelon: Oh, there's the death.
Frezak (GM): I boot it.
Radek: Shut up about death already!
Apheori (GM): What does boot mean?
Frezak (GM): Kick.
Gaurav: We were promised death.
Apheori (GM): Ellemer: Roll something. I don't know what either.
Rhu kneels down and examines the corpse.
Apheori (GM): Pick a skill and eat it.
Ellemerr:
rolling 1d20
(
16
)
=
16
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+10 heal check
(
16
)
+10
=
26
Apheori (GM): Gravy: When you kick the corpse, it slides across the floor and some bits fall off. It appears to be completely dessicated, with skin rendered papr-thin.
Rhu: THIS AIN'T NATURAL.
Gaurav: How so?
Frezak (GM): He was wampired?
Apheori (GM): Ellemer: What skill? Or is this a madness check?
Rhu: Tissue shouldn't be this thin. Nothing should be so loose. It's like a marionette or something, except it was a guy.
A GUY.
Frezak (GM): WAMPIRES
Ellemerr: Hell if I know. Arcana, to... I really don't know.
Rhu looks up at the other two
Rhu: Definitely a dude.
Rhu tugs at the paper-thin skin
The Gravedigger: I have never seen a corpse like that before.
Apheori (GM): Ellemerr: You poke her with magic. It bounces.
Rhu: Maybe he just dried out in here? Wherever this is.
Ellemerr: Heeee!
Rhu: He might have been dead a long time. A really long time.
Amadi grins and does it again.
The Gravedigger: I dunno.
Radek: This isn't a result of just "drying out".
The Gravedigger: If he'd just died, he wouldn't be... dried out.
Apheori (GM): Amadi: This time it bounces back into her, as though she'd absorbed the spark.
Rhu shrugs
Frezak (GM): I'll check the room for anything else other than a corpse and papers.
Amadi blinks, gives the corpse a kitty-eyed look and tries again. Third time's the charm!
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+5 dungeoneering check to look for any obvious traps or other dungeon-related dangers in here
(
2
)
+5
=
7
Apheori (GM): Frezak: Just boxes and papers, an old mug, and some bits of glass.
Frezak (GM): MUG
Ellemerr: It is dark. You are likely to be eaten by a grue.
Frezak (GM): Didn't we want a mug for something?
Apheori (GM): You notice all the shelves are wood, though. That's different.
Ganelon: No, I had one from the rocket.
Frezak (GM): Craftsmanship on the shelves?
Ganelon: Only slightly damaged.
And I gave it to someone.
Frezak (GM): I will take this mug.
Apheori (GM): Shelves are carved like the corridor wood.
Rhu examines the papers
The Gravedigger: Hey, these shelves are fancy.
Apheori (GM): Frezak: There's a thick crust of dried something in the bottom of the mug.
Frezak (GM): I will leave the mug.
Apheori (GM): Amadi: When you poke the corpse again, its eyes open.
Gaurav: Does the corpse look old? Are there any obvious causes of death?
Apheori (GM): And the sphinx wanders over.
Gaurav: Our corpse, I mean.
Ellemerr: Is the corpse not on its back so that I can see this?
Frezak (GM): What is the dry corpse wearing?
Bear Soup Guy: STING MUSIC
GASPING SOUND
CLATTER OF A DROPPED SURGICAL INSTRUMENT
Apheori (GM): Your corpse looks fairly young, no obvious signs of death.
Amadi: Your corpse.. yeah, you see it.
Rhu: So: we're thinking this is some kind of storeroom. This guy was working here, or came in here to hide. And then he died?
Radek: But from what?
Amadi: Sorry to wake you. Did you dream sweetly?
Frezak (GM): Clothing on corpse?
Apheori (GM): The winged woman groans, and tries to focus on Amadi, but mostly just winds up staring at the ceiling.
Then the sphinx starts licking her.
Rhu: And the door was closed, but not locked. So maybe he wasn't hiding. Maybe it was sudden. Like a gas leak? Or something magical?
Apheori (GM): Frezak: Clothing is some kind of robe.
Rhu looks over the papers in the storeroom
Frezak (GM): Does it look like anything we've seen about town?
Amadi: I don't usually do this, you know. That guy is much better at it. He's a keeper. Or a Keeper. Or both.
Frezak (GM): Like, say, the magic lady?
Apheori (GM): Rhu: They're reports. Inventory lists.
Etc.
Amadi points over her shoulder at Greibel.
Frezak (GM): And I want to see if the robe is... breaking down at all.
From age.
Greibel shifts uncomfortably
Rhu looks around for the most interesting looking papers -- anything with names and numbers on them -- and shoves a few into his backpack
Apheori (GM): The woman manages to focus, and tries to sit up by grabbing Amadi.
Amadi: Chess, I made something happen! Come here and deal with it!
Frezak (GM): What things are on these inventories?
Ellemerr: (that was to Greibel.)
Apheori (GM): Mostly rocks.
Gaurav: Do the reports have any headers? That might have information on who is compiling them, for whom they're intended, dates, times ...
Apheori (GM): Nope.
They've got configurations of dots.
Rhu: o.0
Apheori (GM): For headers.
Frezak (GM): Radek knows... sciency things.
Gaurav: Ah okay
Greibel walks over nervously
Frezak (GM): He might have seen it before?
Ganelon: Can't hurt to look.
Frezak (GM): Or a similar alphabetical alternative?
Fragment 17 finally manages to sit up, and looks at Amadi with some confusion.
Fragment 17: Who are you?
Ellemerr: EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
Ganelon: Shall I roll a thing to make sense of dots?
Ellemerr: She is so pretty
Apheori (GM): Sure.
Amadi: We're her. Or used to be. Or are supposed to be. There's a lot of fragments.
Fragment 17: Her?
There are more of you?
Gaurav: I love how on the map, everybody around Fragment 17 looks really intense, and then there's Greibel having a quick smoke beside the other corpse.
Amadi: Did you dream?
Fragment 17 looks around.
Frezak (GM): HAH
Fragment 17: What is this place?
Frezak (GM): He's relaxing.
Fragment 17: What is... dream?
Frezak (GM): taking it eaaaasy.
Fragment 17: The word... it feels so familiar, but it only brings up visions of darkness...
Amadi: What will you remember?
Gaurav: Okay: we've examined the papers, examined the room, the shelves, and the corpse. I think it's time to keep truckin' down this corridor.
Frezak (GM): Agreed.
Amadi: Where is your key?
Frezak (GM): Same process with next door.
With lights taped to Gravy's horns.
Fragment 17: I don't understand.
Frezak (GM): Gorram.
Amadi looks slightly worried.
Amadi: Chess, deal!
Frezak (GM): I love that Greibel avatar.
Amadi hides behind Greibel.
Fragment 17 looks at Greibel.
Fragment 17: You look diffwerent.
Gaurav: I think that might be a fire hazard :-P I'm happy to step up to the door with the torch, given that both Radek and Gravy are standing behind me, weapons drawn.
Apheori (GM): These ain't fire torches.
They're flashlights, that's the word. Sort of.
Except not.
BECAUSE YOU'RE FUTURE ELVES.
Gaurav: Oh, right. Good point.
Greibel: (To the fragment) You look...familiar.
Apheori (GM): Gravy, Rhu: At the next door you find a room with a huge bathtub in the center. Nothing else in it.
Ganelon: Anyone feeling dirty?
Fragment 17: Who am I?
Frezak (GM): That looks bad.
Any smells?
Sounds?
Rhu: Huh.
Greibel: I've been calling you the Tank Girl, in my internal monologue
Apheori (GM): It smells stale, moist.
Frezak (GM): MOIST
Apheori (GM): There's a word for that but I forgot what it was.
Fragment 17: Tank girl?
Rhu: Moist?
How can anything be moist in here? Where would water get in here from?
Rhu tries the faucets on the bathtub, if there are any
Bear Soup Guy: MUSTY
Fragment 17 looks up at the tank for a long moment. "I was in there."
Amadi adds, helpfully and with some possessiveness, "You're not me!"
Fragment 17: I should think not. You're over there. I am... here.
Apheori (GM): Musty, yes.
Amadi: Well that never stopped them before.
Apheori (GM): There's water in the tub.
The sphinx: Hungry.
Frezak (GM): Clear water?
Anything else in the tub?
The sphinx: Stories.
Hungry.
Frezak (GM): LIKE A CORPSE?
Apheori (GM): Clear water, a little bit of residue from calcium separation or something, nothing in it.
Frezak (GM): huh.
What are the walls like?
Fragment 17: Stopped whom?
Rhu pokes at the water, then brings his fingers up to his nose, sniffs, then licks a drop of the water
Apheori (GM): Tiles.
Amadi pokes Greibel in the back. "You tell her."
Apheori (GM): It smells like sulfur.
Frezak (GM): SULFUR
THIS IS THE BATH OF HELL
Greibel: Ehrm...
Apheori (GM): It tastes like iron.
Greibel: Uhhh.....
The Gravedigger: I wouldn't have done that.
Fragment 17: (to Greibel) You don't know what she's talking about either, do you?
Rhu: It smells like sulphur and it tastes like iron. Whatever killed these people, it wasn't iron deprivation.
Radek: Some kind of chemical weapon, maybe?
Greibel: Well, I'm slowly piecing things together. /Very/ slowly.
Amadi sticks her tongue out at the not-her.
Greibel: But no.
The Gravedigger: Hmm.
Amadi: Well, you've got holes in you, too.
The Gravedigger: Looking like a self-contained facility.
No, radek,t hat's a bath.
Gaurav: Is the bathtub big enough for multiple people?
Radek sighs.
Frezak (GM): Harem bath!
Fragment 17 smiles slightly, then asks, "What are you doing here, then?
Fragment 17: I have holes?
Or does he?
Greibel: This world is crazy. There's holes in everything.
Fragment 17 looks at herself, realises she's all wet, and uses Greibel to pull herself upright.
Amadi: I don't think he does. Lucky.
Fragment 17: Are there any towels?
Amadi: Or unlucky. If we didn't have holes...
Amadi shudders.
Fragment 17: No, there are holes.
I think... I think that's why I awoke.
Radek: Let's just keep moving.
Amadi: You took my fancy light.
Frezak (GM): Yup.
Fragment 17: Can I give it back?
Amadi: It was full of words that weren't spoken.
Frezak (GM): Keep on doing the thing.
Rhu: Agreed.
Gaurav: Same routine on the next door?
Amadi: That's up to you, now, isn't it?
Apheori (GM): A moment. I'll be right back.
Gaurav: The thing must be kept on with.
Frezak (GM): NEVER STOP THINGING
Bear Soup Guy: THING EVERY DAY
Ellemerr: If Apheori returns and I seem absent, poke me on skype.
Apheori (GM): I'm back.
Gaurav: Back to thinging then.
Frezak (GM): Thingage!
Fragment 17 considers this for a moment, then asks, "Do I know the words?"
Apheori (GM): Rhu, Radek, Gravy: You search some more rooms. One of them has a huge pile of corpses and several broken chairs.
Gaurav: How huge?
Rhu examines the broken chairs
Apheori (GM): What, you want a volume?
Frezak (GM): Yes.
Apheori (GM): It's as high as Gravy is tall.
Frezak (GM): In litres.
Apheori (GM): I don't know maths.
So I can't tell you.
Frezak (GM): That's a big pile.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+12 perception check on the chairs, with particular attention to whether there's any blood at the broken edges
(
18
)
+12
=
30
Frezak (GM): Is there.... some kind of claw on the ceiling?
Radek: Who would pile up corpses like this?
Frezak (GM): How big IS the door?
Gaurav: Ha, yes, height is fine. I just wanted to know if it was 5-6 corpses or a couple of dozen.
Apheori (GM): The chairs look like everything from office chairs to loveseats to bar stools. No two are the same type.
Ganelon: Is anything remarkable about the corpses?
Apheori (GM): It looks like they're all missing one leg.
Door is normal. Ceiling is normal.
The corpses are all either skeletons or dried like the other one.
Well, no, that's not right.
Some of them look like normal dried corpses.
The Gravedigger: How the hells did they get piled up like this?
Gaurav: For the dried corpses, are there any discernible patterns? Are they all young, all elven, all dressed similarly?
Apheori (GM): Mostly all wearing robes.
A lot of humans, some elves.
Also as a note about the fragment, she's supposed to have slightly lighter skin than Amadi and brown hair, but I was rushed making the picture.
Amadi: Even if you once did, I bet they would've all leaked out through those holes. If you know words, you should speak to the wordless.
Fragment 17: Well.
Rhu: This is a strange place.
Fragment 17: I have no idea what that means.
You are Amadi, yes?
The Gravedigger: Yep.
Rhu: There doesn't seem to be a pattern to the pileage. You'd think a bathtub would be a good place to dump a couple of corpses, but no. Instead someone piled them all up in this room, except for one who was left in the storeroom, or maybe died there.
Amadi lights up, looking amazed and suddenly very happy.
Fragment 17: And Greibel. Rasputin. Gezrau.
Rhu: Bah.
Amadi: Am I Amadi?
The Gravedigger: Any ideas on smart things to do here?
Fragment 17 looks to each as she says the name, ending with the sphinx.
Radek: If there was any consistency to the way they died, maybe.
Amadi: Oh hey, cheating!
Radek: But I can't see into the past.
Fragment 17: You... no.
But you look very much like her.
I... think.
Gaurav: Apheori: did you draw both Amadi and Frag17? How long did that take?
Fragment 17 looks over her shoulder, almost as if at something.
The Gravedigger: Might be interesting to find out where this is.
Apheori (GM): I drew Fern, turned the image into Amadi, turned that into the fragment.
Amadi sags back down, resting her forehead against Greibel's shoulder.
Gaurav: Apheori: nice!
Greibel looks around the room and at its various occupants completely dumbfounded
The Gravedigger: Like, some kind of... wooden space station.
Greibel pats Amadi on the other shoulder
Rhu: That would be pretty cool.
The Gravedigger: It's not underwater, since I don't hear stress.
Rhu: Do you think we might be in space? I thought we must be underground again, but ... well, I really hope we're still on that planet, because otherwise who knows what planet we've ended up at this time.
The Gravedigger: We'd hear machinery, surely?
Engines? Generator?
And I doubt that a space station would last long, if it's made of wood and not maintained.
Amadi talks to the fragment without raising her head, muffling the sound against Greibel's back. "Do you know what your name should've been if it hadn't been lost?"
Radek: You would be an idiot to make anything out of wood if it were supposed to withstand a vaccuum.
Not that I'm discounting the possibility.
The Gravedigger: Not if you had a ton of magic to get things working.
Radek: Why waste time with materials at all, then?
The Gravedigger: That woman earlier could teleport.
Fragment 17 looks back, then down as the sphinx rubs against her legs, as though oblivious.
The Gravedigger: Make it look fancy?
Fragment 17: No.
Radek: Magic can do that too.
It can do everything.
Frezak (GM): I want to take a light swing at some wooden wall and see if my shovel edge bites into it like wood.
Amadi: Me neither.
The Gravedigger: Maybe the magic goes towards structural integrity if they don't have the materials to withstand the void.
Rhu: What if the whole place caves in?
The Gravedigger: It's.. unlikely?
I don't hear any stress.
Radek: I would be able to tell if this place was being held together by magic.
Apheori (GM): The shovel goes into the wood and hits stone behind the panelling.
Rhu: If we could find some sort of ventilation duct, it might lead "outside", wherever "outside" is. We could send Radek's robot through the duct and get a report back to us.
Ganelon: (He would say this even if it weren't true)
The Gravedigger: Have you tried?
Ganelon: Sure, I'll roll an Arcana.
rolling 1d20+11
(
9
)
+11
=
20
Apheori (GM): It ain't held together with it as far as you can tell, but there seem to be points of magic, especially in the intersections.
Gaurav: Intersections?
Apheori (GM): Doorways, corridor crossings.
There's one up ahead, if you left the room.
Radek: Well, there's magic alright, but it's not everywhere.
Frezak (GM): Are the doors just normal hinged wooden doors?
Radek: It's all focused on these doorways.
Apheori (GM): Yeah.
Rhu: Huh. Magic couldn't have piled all these bodies up in this way, could it? By itself, I mean. You'd still need someone to wield the magic and make it do this.
Amadi: (to Greibel) You have a fancy back.
Radek: Not necessarily. Suppose we threw bodies into the teleporter one after the other.
Amadi: Did you want me to speak to any of the other dead ones?
Radek: Naturally, they would end up in a pile.
The Gravedigger: Could you make a... magical Artificial Intelligence?
Fragment 17 dries herself off with a word and starts wandering around the room, poking at desks and equipment.
Ganelon: That seems like a "Ask the DM" question.
Greibel: Uhm....
Ganelon: Do magic AIs exist?
The Gravedigger: Magic that casts magic?
Greibel: If you can?
Gaurav: None of the bodies have any kind of identification, right? What about distinctive necklaces or earrings? Letters on their cloaks? Clothing tags?
Greibel: Be a shame to leave them dead...
Rhu: Radek: Ooh, good point. Especially if the destination were a trap.
Amadi: Do you have all the words you ought to? How are your eyes?
Apheori (GM): Radek would be familiar with them as an example of a really bad idea. They can be made to work, but it's generally a lot easier to just use technology for the framework and only fill in the rest with magic.
Greibel: My eyes are fine. I eat plenty of carrots.
Apheori (GM): Purely magical ones tend to go... horribly wrong.
Radek: A purely magical AI?
It's been done. It's universally considered to be a mistake.
Rhu: I wonder if we put something on the teleport and hit one of the trap buttons, people end up in one of these rooms.
Fragment 17 looks back to Amadi and Greibel quizically.
Radek: They're unstable, yes.
The Gravedigger: Mistake?
As in going crazy?
and,say, killing the occupants with magic?
And putting them in piles?
For example?
Amadi pokes Greibel's back experimentally before crapping over to the golem-"corpse" without getting up.
Radek: I suppose. I'm still not ruling this out as some kind of teleporter accident, though.
Apheori (GM): (None have specifically done that, but it could be possible.)
Greibel twinges oddly at the poke
The porridge jiggles.
Bear Soup Guy: PORRIDGE AVATAR WHAT
Apheori (GM): XD
The Gravedigger: Would a teleporter make people dry out like this?
Amadi: (to golem) Hello.
Apheori (GM): The golem does nothing.
Gaurav: That is a fantastic porridge avatar.
Frezak (GM): That looks like a flan?
Radek: Did you feel particularly "dried out" on your arrival here?
Amadi: Were you ever even alive?
Apheori (GM): I'd like to see you find a good picture of congealed porridge.
Rhu: Let's keep investigating. If we're out of doors, we'll have to go back to the transporter, but I hope one of them will lead outside.
Amadi: You don't seem like a wordy person.
The Gravedigger: No.
But Mr Mousie's bones got rearranged.
Apheori (GM): Amadi: You sense the answer is, in a way, no. And, in a way, yes.
You also sense that the words were there, but now aren't.
Amadi flings some magic unspoken words at the golem.
Amadi:
rolling 1d20
(
5
)
=
5
Gaurav: http://cloverfreak.deviantart.com/art/Evil-Porridge-155073135
Apheori (GM): The words bounce off the golem with sparks.
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Amadi: Well, that was pretty.
The Gravedigger: While ours haven't.... yet.
Rhu: Maybe it only works one way. You can teleport here any time you like, but when you try to teleport out ...
Radek: I can say with some certainty that your bones are not liable to be compromised on our way out.
Gaurav: This is genuinely what I imagine Rasputin looks like, down to the sickly yellow colour: http://happinessstanlives.files.wordpress.com/2011/11/img_1639.jpg?w=1200
Apheori (GM): Aside from the colour, yes.
Gaurav: Have you looked inside all the rooms?
we*
Ganelon: Yeah, any more weird corpse stuff going on?
Amadi turns to Greibel to explain: "It's not a word-person. Not like Dave." She pauses, pondering. "No, that's not it, either. Dawn, maybe? Anyway, this is... not wordy. Not now."
Amadi: What do you think, Dawn? Breakfast? Wingy?
Apheori (GM): Nothing weirdly corpsey anywhere else. Some skeletons in an office.
Some more storrooms, one entirely full of rocks.
You think you hear voices down the next corridor.
Frezak (GM): Examine rocks?
Apheori (GM): Also most of the lights are actually on here.
Frezak (GM): VOICES?
Apheori (GM): The rocks are... lots of different kinds.
Voices maybe.
Frezak (GM): Any interesting properties to the rocks?
Fragment 17: Did you put Dawn in the dishwasher?
What is Dawn?
Frezak (GM): like, god for fuel, magnetic, or anthing more special.
Fragment 17: I mean...
Gaurav: Voices!
Amadi: You're Dawn. You might be. You're early, aren't you?
You're not quite Dave, at any rate.
Ganelon: Stealth.
Gaurav: Anybody want to stealth ahead and try to eavesdrop on any conversations?
Ganelon: ...Yeah.
Apheori (GM): A couple are slightly magnetic, there are a lot of porous ones, some shiny ones.
Frezak (GM): Don't ask me to stealth.
Ganelon: Mine's 1.
Frezak (GM): I'm at... -2.
Gaurav: My stealth is +3
haha
I'll try, then.
Fragment 17: And Dave is...?
Frezak (GM): GOOD LUCK
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+3 stealth check to tiptoe down the corridor and try to listen in on the voices
(
7
)
+3
=
10
Frezak (GM): You'll need it.
Oh dear.
Amadi: You're really full of holes, you know?
Amadi steps up to investigate the fat corpse.
Greibel: Does Dave have holes?
Apheori (GM): What's a passive perception check?
Gaurav: 10+perception modified
Frezak (GM): >.>
Gaurav: it's as if you rolled a 10 on your d20
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You hear someone in the corridor.
Greibel gets quiet
Ellemerr: I'll attempt something magical at this corpse as well.
rolling 1d20
(
9
)
=
9
Greibel:
rolling 1d20+10 perception check on the corridor
(
5
)
+10
=
15
Apheori (GM): Ellemerr: It explodes.
Frezak (GM): AWESOME
DO IT AGAIN
Apheori (GM): Corpse bits fly everywhere, but they all bounce off you.
Ellemerr: EW
Bear Soup Guy: WOOO!
Gaurav: Ooof
Ellemerr: Oh good.
Greibel dives down, not having seen the explosion and assuming weapons
Amadi: ... I made holes.
Fragment 17 tiptoes up to Amadi. "What did you do that for?"
Amadi giggles.
Amadi: I just wanted to give him words. Everyone deserves words. I don't think he liked them.
Apheori (GM): So you all are probably more down here.
Frezak (GM): hah!
Apheori (GM): And Rhu is like over there.
And there's a door.
Ganelon: So, did we hear an explosion?
Apheori (GM): Big door.
Double door.
Gaurav: Closed?
Apheori (GM): Yes.
And voices.
Frezak (GM): I KNOW SOMEONE THAT CAN OPEN DOORS
Gaurav: Do I recognize the voices?
Apheori (GM): Nope.
They sound like women.
That's all you can tell for sure.
Roll insight or something.
Rhu motions Radek and Gravy over, signing that there are voices coming from through the door
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+5 insight check
(
5
)
+5
=
10
Apheori (GM): You probabky heard the explosion.
Frezak (GM): I'll creep closer and use Gravy ears.
rolling 1D20+20
(
16
)
+20
=
36
Fragment 17: The dead give up their words, I think.
Apheori (GM): You hear the fragment.
Greibel: He gave up a lot more than words
Rhu does a "knock?" gesture behind the door, asking the others if they should knock or just barge through like they've been doing for the other doors
Greibel wipes corpse bits off his torso
Amadi: I'm not sure we can do that.
Fragment 17: Are we dead?
Ganelon: I say we break in.
Amadi: Are we alive?
Ganelon: Dramatically.
Frezak (GM): AYE
Fragment 17: That would be the alternative question.
Frezak (GM): Do the doors open towards us or outwards?
Amadi takes a comb out of somewhere and starts brushing her hair.
Rhu nods, and steps up to the door and grabs hold of the handle, ready to pull on it when Gravy is ready
Apheori (GM): Outwards.
Frezak (GM): THen I could just charge 'em open, right?
WE EXAMINE THE HINGES CAREFULLY
Fragment 17 checks her pockets and finds them empty.
Gaurav: Oh right hinges
Apheori (GM): They look like hinges.
Apparently designed to keep things in, rather than out.
Frezak (GM): I'll make sure everyone is ready.
Fragment 17: Do you know where my things are?
Radek nods at Gravy.
Gaurav: so the door opens inwards? or outwards?
Frezak (GM): And charge when Rhu opens a door.
Amadi: Have you tried reaching for them?
Gaurav: inwards would make more sense if they expected to keep people in?
Fragment 17 reaches into the air experimentally.
Rhu nods at Gravy and Radek, and then
Rhu PULLS
The Gravedigger CHARGES
The Gravedigger: HELLO DEATH
Ganelon: MAN DOWN
The sphinx pounces at the Gravedigger.
The Gravedigger: I AM YOUR- oh, hey Greibel.
AAAGH, CAT
EVAC, EVAC!
Greibel: Oh, hi...
Welcome to the BODY ROOM
Apheori (GM): Gravy: There's a cat stuck to you.
Rhu steps quickly around the corner
Frezak (GM): I'll shake it off.
Rhu: Huh?
Greibel: Except well...the bodies are exploded, alive, or abandoned now
Apheori (GM): You'll need to roll.
Rhu: Oh wow.
Frezak (GM): Okay, endurance Vs Fort.
rolling 1D20+9
(
15
)
+9
=
24
Fragment 17 pulls a staff out of the air.
Frezak (GM): That would shake off a Gnoll.
Fragment 17 points it at the newcomers.
Radek: I was starting to wonder if we had the right address.
Apheori (GM): Cats are a lot lighter.
Than gnolls.
Ganelon: Oh, he couldn't lift a gnoll.
But he could un-grab himself.
Amadi fights with a particularly persistent knot in her hair.
Apheori (GM): And that fails to shake off the cat, though now it's dangling by a claw looking very upset.
Rhu: This is an awesome room. I am so glad we had a chance to visit this room.
Mrs. Teatime!
Frezak (GM): I'll lift it to head height.
The Gravedigger: Let go.
Fragment 17 sees how unconcerned Amadi looks and lowers the staff.
Fragment 17 then looks at it more closely, like where the hell did this come from?
Amadi disappears.
Radek: Now this looks interesting...
Gaurav: Have we ever seen Amadi look concerned yet?
Radek: Hey, drug addict, what have you been doing in here?
Gaurav: I think there was a moment while she was alone with Greibel last game
The sphinx falls off.
Rhu: Hi, Devourer. How's it going?
The Gravedigger: More dead people!
Greibel: Resurrecting dead people, apparently
Not bad for a drug addict, I say
The Gravedigger: You can do that?
Wow.
Rhu: Dead people are definitely a theme in this place.
Radek: No, but I know him.
Fragment 17: (to Greibel) Excuse me, are these friends of yours?
Greibel: Oh, everyone, meet....uh....Dave
Fragment 17: Dave?
Greibel: Dave, these are my friend, Gravy, Radek and Rhu
Rhu waves at Dave
Greibel: They're all very nice, except for Radek
Rhu tries to talk to the sphinx again
Fragment 17: Hello.
Do you know what this place is?
The Gravedigger: Full of dead people?
There's tons of death about.
The sphinx watches Rhu.
Fragment 17: Are you dead?
Rhu: We should name it. I like the Corspocalypse myself.
Or the Catacombs.
Oooh, papers.
The Gravedigger: The Coffin!
Full of dead people and made of wood!
Rhu examines the papers on the table
Rhu: ... that works really well actually
Greibel: Coffins aren't really "full of" dead people though.
Fragment 17: I don't think this place is supposed to be a coffin.
Though perhaps it has become a tomb.
Rhu: Oh, there's piles of them about. Piles. There's a room we can refer you to if you want to see them. Also there's a bathtub.
Greibel: Now see, listen to that
Apheori (GM): Bathtub seems like something Amadi would have fun with.
Greibel: Coffins don't have bathtubs, silly
Rhu: We think it might be a teleporter malfunction. Live person gets it, zap, dead person falls out in the storeroom.
The Gravedigger: You haven't seen super fancy coffins, Greibel.
Some of them have televisions.
Greibel pauses in amazement
Radek: Oh yes, it would be a shame if we weren't trying at all possible times to further accelerate the brain decay of our corpses.
Gaurav: Once we're done figuring this place out, our next adventure should be a trip to a coffin expo.
Ganelon: What are the papers about?
Amadi: Can you have pictures in death, if it is devoid of words?
Amadi appears inside the "empty" tank again.
Greibel: Well that is just an excellent question
Apheori (GM): The papers are research notes, grant requests, and other things. They seem to explain why this lab was created.
But then the sphinx sits on them.
Rhu: Excuse me.
Rhu tries to move one of the sphinx's paws so he can look at the papers again
Fragment 17: I think... death is empty. There isn't anything.
If we're dead and dreaming, then we're not really dead.
What is dead?
Rhu: A pile of bodies is pretty dead, I think.
The sphinx hisses at Rhu and then jumps at his face, clawing and biting.
Rhu tries to move the sphinx's paw again.
The Gravedigger: Dead is when your bits stop working.
Rhu: AAAAAA
The Gravedigger: HEY, CAT.
GET OFF RHU.
Fragment 17: My bits... are not working.
Rhu: Is that an attack against reflex or AC?
Gaurav: oops
Amadi: They're really not.
Fragment 17: Reflex.
Gaurav: Roll the attack then.
Fragment 17:
rolling 1d20 + 11
(
17
)
+11
=
28
Gaurav: oof
He hits me square in the face.
What's the damage?
Fragment 17:
rolling 1d8 + 4
(
7
)
+4
=
11
Apheori (GM): Sorry.
Frezak (GM): Good lord.
Apheori (GM): But that.
Gaurav: Any effects? Otherwise, it's probably easiest if Rhu falls over backwards and is prone
Fragment 17: You have a sphinx attached to your face.
Apheori (GM): Dammit, wrong character.
Gaurav: haha yes apart from that :-P
Apheori (GM): I guess that's grabbed, but not to much effect because sphinxes are small?
Bear Soup Guy: Although that line does fit the character
The Gravedigger: Get off my friend, cat!
Apheori (GM): So no real effect.
Fragment 17: Ghezrau! No.
Fragment 17 points at the sphinx.
Fragment 17: Get down.
Amadi: It's hungry.
Ganelon: Frezak and I ruled that if you're grabbing a creature significantly larger than yourself, it should either be slowed and take you along with it when it moves, or if it's even bigger, the same without being slowed.
The Gravedigger: Oh, hey, Sandwich Lady.
Fragment 17: Of course it's hungry. It's been trapped for an unending lifetime.
Ganelon: Because it's silly to think you could hold a giant in place, but you could still hold on.
Gaurav: He's not that small, he's, what, 3-4 ft high at the shoulder? I have this written down somewhere.
The sphinx slowly lets go and drops to the floor.
The sphinx: It glares at Rhu.
Dammit.
Apheori (GM): Er, ooc.
Rhu: (to sphinx) Easy, easy.
Amadi climbs out of the tank and saunters over to not-Dave-either.
Apheori (GM): Naw, it's a small sphinx. More like 2-3ft tall.
The sphinx hisses, then grins.
Amadi: Story.
Ganelon: I would like to discern what the research being conducted here was about, while these people are off being silly.
And/or attacked by cats.
Rhu looks at Amadi, then at the sphinx
Rhu: Is that what you want? A story?
Amadi: Hungry.
Gaurav: Is that Amadi or the sphinx?
Ellemerr: Amadi.
The sphinx: Hungry.
Ellemerr: THAT is the sphinx.
Greibel rubs his stomach
Fragment 17: Hungry?
Greibel: Hungry
Gaurav: Okay.
Rhu: Okay.
Um.
The Gravedigger: I have some deerbits?
Rhu tells the sphinx a story about the god Ganesha, how he was created and the first war he fought.
Amadi sits down cross-legged, watching Rhu intently as he talks.
Apheori (GM): Radek: While the sphinx is distracted, you go through the notes. Apparently they were researching an assortment of rifts that had been opening up on several planes. They collected some of what had come through here.
Rhu finishes his story
Rhu: (to sphinx) How was that?
The sphinx: God rats are good eating.
Rhu: Ah. Hm. Okay.
But if you want another story, you'll ask me? And not just jump on my face? That's not really very helpful.
The sphinx was also swaying to the story.
The sphinx stopped when it ended.
The sphinx now just stares at Rhu, then bares another huge unsettling grin.
Ganelon: I'll take the notes.
This seems incredibly relevant.
Rhu: Um. Okay. Great. Good talk.
Fragment 17 strokes the Sphinx absent-mindedly.
Rhu gets up
Rhu: (to Fragment 17) Sorry, you are ... Dave?
Amadi: Could've been. Maybe. I'm not Amadi, either.
Fragment 17: I suppose?
Rhu: He seems to like you. He came back from the City of the Dead with me.
Any ... how to avoid sphinxes jumping on your face advice?
Fragment 17 whispers 'Dave', testing how it sounds.
The Gravedigger: Wear a mask?
Helmet?
Rhu: Just don't travel with a sphinx, maybe.
The Gravedigger: Put it in a box?
Radek: Invisible wards.
The Gravedigger: BURY IT?
Radek: They always do the trick.
The Gravedigger: Boxes are cheaper.
Rhu: What are those?
Fragment 17: Respect the sphinx. Don't try to force it.
They don't like that.
Would you?
The Gravedigger: Like a box, but expensive and then you see an angry cat.
Greibel: He's not angry, he's just grumpy
The Gravedigger: You would if you looked.
Amadi: Cats are words. Full of words. Sphinxes, more so.
Greibel reaches down to pat the sphinx's head
Fragment 17 picks up the sphinx and hugs it.
The Gravedigger: He'd be angry if he was in a box.
Rhu: I guess not? But ... I can trust Greibel and Gravy and Radek to not get distracted while we're fighting something. I don't want to be stuck with an assassin in front of me and an angry sphinx behind me.
Fragment 17: But you are so fluffy and adorable, aren't you?
Radek: Really? You trust Greibel not to get distracted?
Rhu smiles
Rhu: He is pretty adorable for a savage weapon of death.
Amadi: So
So's the shovel.
Rhu: More or less. I'm less certain that he won't turn into a flock of seagulls and just sit there, but I don't think he's going to suddenly turn on me mid-initiative
The Gravedigger: My shovel isn't a weapon of death.
Technically it's a tool of post-death.
Rhu suddenly realizes that we never took the torches off Gravy's horns
Greibel: Pish posh
The Gravedigger: And a dealer of death on the side.
Rhu: Do you want to take those off?
The Gravedigger: Huh?
Greibel: In combat I'd much more likely turn into a bear and just sit there
The Gravedigger: OHHHH
RIIIIIGHT.
The Gravedigger takes off the torches.
Rhu: They suit you thought
The Gravedigger: Couldn't you turn to pigeons and distract people?
Amadi "aaaaaws" with the saddest expression at Gravy's removal of the light.
The Gravedigger: I'm better at being hit.
It's for the better, sandwich lady. The glue makes them itch.
Greibel: But bears are great at not being turned to soup
The Gravedigger: A valuable talent?
Amadi mutters sadly, "You were like a christmas tree. All about the waiting. I wanted a present."
Rhu: (to Greibel) did you come in through the same door we did? Or the other one?
Fragment 17: Aren't you the present?
No, that's not right.
Greibel: Errrrm
Fragment 17: This is terrible. So much almost remembering. So little truth.
Greibel: I came in through...oh dear.
Amadi: Labyrinth. There was a shrine. You should all pray. It may or may not be helpful later.
The Gravedigger: Pray?
Rhu looks confused
Radek: Sensible man.
Rhu: We should pray ... now? Here?
The Gravedigger: I don't pray.
Greibel: You've prayed in more precarious situations than this
The Gravedigger: I've seen countless dead people that prayed.
Amadi: No, silly, at the shrine!
Greibel: (to Rhu)
The Gravedigger: They still ended up in the dirt.
Next to the ones that didn't.
Rhu: Everything dies. It is the dead end Hazz'ridan has in store for us all.
Which shrine, Mrs. Teatime?
Fragment 17 places a hand on Rhu's forehead.
Amadi: The one in the labyrinth. Hazz's ways are all blind, you know? Nothing but a blind way.
Rhu: Er.
Yes
?
Fragment 17: You're like a beacon.
Amadi: Don't poke out your eyes. It's a terrible idea.
Fragment 17: A beacon of dead ends.
The Gravedigger: Labyrinth?
We could just go back down the hall.
Rhu: We don't know where the corridor we were in goes. I don't -- waitaminute.
(to Greibel and Amadi) How did you two get here? Where did you teleport in from?
Amadi: I got in through there.
Amadi points at the empty tank.
Greibel: I got in from the hallway
Rhu: So you teleported into the tank?
Amadi: No. I awoke there. Because he's here.
He's a keeper, you know? Wouldn't wake up anywhere else. Would be silly.
Rhu: Greibel?
Amadi: Chess.
Rhu: No, sorry, I don't play chess.
The Gravedigger: I do.
It's relaxing.
I'm rubbish at it, though.
Fragment 17 heals Rhu somehow and removes her hand.
Gaurav: oooo
Fragment 17 then proceeds to stare at her hand wondering what it just did.
Radek: ...Say, is that what I think it is?
Ganelon: (Warforged)
Rhu looks confused. He reaches up and touches the sphinx scratches on his his head, and is even more confused when there isn't any injury there.
Apheori (GM): Yeah, you'd know of them as something that's... mostly common in games, frankly. They're extremely rare.
Gaurav: Games?
Apheori (GM): Videogames.
Gaurav: Oh o.0 That's meta.
Apheori (GM): They're not native to the known worlds, at any rate, but stories made it back and they often wound up in games because who doesn't like hulking construct-like humanoids?
Gaurav: Terrible people, that's who.
Ganelon: Well damn.
That's more interesting to Radek than the babbling of these two clones.
Bear Soup Guy nods
Bear Soup Guy: This world's Michael Bay and J.J. Abrams probably collaborated on a film series about them too
Ganelon: Most things classify as babbling to him.
Gaurav: hahaha
(From Amadi): Do I know videogames, or is that knowledge stuck in another fragment?
Gaurav: "This summer ... a warforged back from the Great War faces the ultimate challenge ... being a nanny to four impossible children."
Bear Soup Guy: XD XD XD
Frezak (GM): And the children are Were-Maggots.
Gaurav: I bet they got an elf to play the warforged
Bear Soup Guy: Most likely
(To Amadi): You totally know videogames. Probably. If you want to.
(To Amadi): But would you know any of these? Perhaps not.
(From Amadi): That fits. Thanks.
Radek: This is a Warforged!
The Gravedigger: A what?
Radek: They're... ugh, of course you wouldn't know.
Rhu: Dave?
Fragment 17: What?
The Gravedigger: What?
Frezak (GM): So Radek plays videogames?
Bear Soup Guy: "Of COURSE you wouldn't know. You didn't play the Japanese import version of War Machines: Full Metal Himanoid. Philistines."
Humanoid even
Frezak (GM): Full Metal Philistines.
Ganelon: Plays, played, or he has a legitimate academic interest in the things.
I mean, he IS an artificer. They're the ones who made the Warforged.
At least in normal 4E.
Apheori (GM): Radek can be familiar with what inspired the games, too.
Well, they're not normal where you all are from.
That's the problem, and why they took off with such a fascination in all those games.
But that would explain why he'd care, too.
Radek: They're... sentient golems.
Rhu: You mean, like in those computer games? Dave's ... a robot?
Bear Soup Guy: :O
Amadi perks up. "Computer games?"
Rhu: o.0
Rhu looks at Dave, then looks back at Radek
Fragment 17 shrugs, looking confused.
Bear Soup Guy: brb
Fragment 17: Oh, I think... he's talking abou the... thing over there.
Fragment 17 points.
Ganelon: So what's up with this one? Is it dead?
Rhu: OH! My bad.
Apheori (GM): Dead or similar.
Rhu wanders over and peers down at the warforged, then wanders back to the table to look at more papers
Apheori (GM): Like all its magic got dispersed, if that's even possible.
Amadi pokes Rhu.
Amadi: What computer games?
Radek: This one's just a shell, though...
Fragment 17: Am I a robot?
Fragment 17 holds up a hand and looks at it oddly.
Ganelon: Could I put a soul in it, assuming I had one?
Amadi: No. You have words in a completely different way than robots. You could've been -in- a robot, I suppose...
Apheori (GM): If that's how they work, then sure?
Ganelon: It serves a purpose equivalent to their brain.
Fragment 17: In?
Ganelon: My point still stands.
Frezak (GM): Normally Warforged are made with artificial souls.
I mean it might have one already in it.
Rhu: (to Amadi) Have you ever played Total War: Passerine? You can lead entire armies of warforged! They're like, robots. Well, sentient golems. I guess.
Amadi: I have... played... uhm.
I think I like the Path?
Frezak (GM): Last time I read about that, there was a warforged thinking he was a little boy and wearing bits of skin on his face because he thought the he had his face on wrong, because why else did he not look like the other people?
Gaurav: How does one procure a soul?
Can we use Mr. Mousie's?
Ganelon: Well, apparently this one is empty.
Of magic, and presumably a soul.
(To Amadi): They should use a soul tomato.
Frezak (GM): YES
RAVE
YOU ARE A GENIUS
(From Amadi): Should I tell them? xD
(To Amadi): It'd fit. If you want?
Gaurav: It'll all end in tears. But there'll be a heck of a lot of laughter right before then.
(To Amadi): Since that's totally from a videogame and everything!
Apheori (GM): Do you have any way to collect an already dead mouse soul and transfer it?
Ganelon: You'll have to tell me that.
I won't make assumptions about how souls work.
Apheori (GM): You're the artificier.
Amadi eyes Radek and the warforged. "So... that thing is from a game... or the game is from that? And Grumpy is trying to make it work?"
Ganelon: Well, that sounds to me like a rather specific kind of tool to be carrying around, so if magic alone can't do it?
Apheori (GM): Let's say mouse souls loiter about the body until they disperse.
Ganelon: I'd have to be a bit more prepared.
Rhu: Who knows. He's pretty good at machines, though, is Radek. He's probably going to fashion a gun out of its arm or something.
Frezak (GM): STOP ARGUING AND DO THIS
Rhu: We are in a lab.
Amadi: He should use a soul tomato.
Amadi nods sagely.
Gaurav: Maybe they have a little CPR machine somewhere.
Radek: Anyone have a soul they want to volunteer?
The Gravedigger: A what?
Radek: I could try to get this thing online with one.
Rhu: Soap?
I think I still have a bar in my backpack somewhere ...
Radek: ...No, Rhu. A soul.
Rhu: o.0
The Gravedigger thrusts the corpse of Mr.Mousie at Radek.
The Gravedigger: HERE.
Fragment 17 holds up a ball of light above her hand.
The Gravedigger: BRING BACK MR MOUSIE.
Fragment 17: What.
Radek: ...A mouse, huh.
Apheori (GM): Then the light goes out and she just looks confused.
Bear Soup Guy: I RETURNED AND CAUGHT UP
The Gravedigger: No.
It's Mr.Mousie.
Apheori (GM): And I guess her name is Dave, so...
Rhu: (to Fragment 17) ... err, did you just make a ball of light?
Fragment 17 is now Dave.
Rhu: ... with your hands?
Radek: Well, can't hurt to try.
Dave: I don't know.
Did I?
Ganelon: First, I want to make sure this body is in working condition, minus the magic.
Rhu: Show me your hands.
Dave holds out the non-sphinx-encmbered hand.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+10 heal check on Dave's hands to see if I notice any burns or anything odd
(
19
)
+10
=
29
Ganelon: Because it would be pretty rude to put a soul into a paralyzed or otherwise non-functioning body.
Amadi looks interested over Radek's shoulder.
Gaurav: Yes okay THAT i roll a 19 for
Apheori (GM): Aye.
Frezak (GM): SINCE WHEN IS RADEK CARING ABOUT BEING RUDE?
Ganelon: He won't get results if the body can't move!
This is also true.
Gaurav: It's a machine. Radek is very polite to machines.
Ganelon: He likes machines more than you guys.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: The hand looks perfect. Slightly disconcertingly so.
Rhu: (to Dave) Has anybody ever told you you have perfect hands?
Like, *perfect* hands.
Something's not right here.
How did you get here, anyway?
Dave: I don't recall that anyone has ever told me anything.
I...
I don't know.
Greibel: I sort of pulled a lever on one of those consoles and she fell out of a tank
Dave: I think I was in a tank. The first thing I remember was her *gestures toward Amadi* leaning over me...
Greibel: And then Amadi....did Amadi things and she woke up
Dave: Oh.
Amadi things.
Amadi: I gave her unspoken words.
Greibel: I don't try to explain them. We're just along for the ride.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+11
(
15
)
+11
=
26
Apheori (GM): Radek: Roll technical or something.
Amadi looks incredibly proud of herself.
Rhu: Unspoken words? Is that, like, magic?
Dave: What ride?
Greibel gestures around the room
Apheori (GM): Gan: Seems fine. Some odd damage to the head.
Greibel: The most thrilling roller coaster in the universe
Apheori (GM): But all the parts should function.
Amadi: I guess it's like magic in that tomatoes are like strawberries, minus the antlers?
Ganelon: Okay.
Greibel: You're thinking of deer, dear.
The sphinx purrs.
Ganelon: I will attempt to put the mouse's soul...
In this battle-ready golem body.
Amadi: ... Well at least I'm thinking.
Frezak (GM): WHOOO
Rhu: They're not the same thing. A tomato is a botanical berry, but a strawberry is an aggregate accessory fruit.
Amadi keeps looking satisfied with herself.
Rhu: I read that on the internet.
Greibel: That's the spirit!
Dave: The internet has been known to lie.
Amadi: It is known.
Dave: Is it?
Okay. Good.
The Gravedigger: I uh.... move dirt around?
Ganelon: Three arcana thingies?
The Gravedigger: Sorry, felt like I should contribute something.
Apheori (GM): Gan: Roll three thingies!
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+11
(
11
)
+11
=
22
rolling 1d20+11
(
2
)
+11
=
13
rolling 1d20+11
(
9
)
+11
=
20
Uh oh.
Apheori (GM): Sure!
Amadi: Did he find any soul tomatoes? Is he doing computer games?
Rhu: Oh, is he doing something?
The Gravedigger: He's helping Mr Mousie!
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+11
(
11
)
+11
=
22
Apheori (GM): Radek: It may or may not have worked. Roll another.
Amadi is still pretty interested in whatever Radek is doing despite conversing with Rhu and not-Dave.
Rhu: With a sentient gollem?
Radek: You raise a good point, actually!
Apheori (GM): You think it worked, but now it's just sitting there.
The Gravedigger: It's not sentient yet!
Radek: We don't classify animals as sentient, so really, we can't call this golem one either.
But it should have worked.
Dave wanders over to look at it as well.
The Gravedigger: Hey! Mr Mousie was really smart!
Radek: I'm... hrm. I'm not sure why it isn't moving.
Dave: The tree-speaker could speak to it.
Rhu gives up on making any sense of the papers, picks up a handful of interesting-looking ones, and shoves them into his backpack. Then he wanders over to the tanks.
Ganelon: I already got a bunch of the papers.
Seemed like research on holes.
The Gravedigger pokes the warforged.
Ganelon: The kind we're after.
The Gravedigger: Mr Mousie?
Radek grumbles.
Amadi leans further over Radek's shoulder for a better look. Then she suddenly topples and falls on him. "To... mato..." she mutters, before giving up a sleeping sound and disappearing.
Dave: Does she always do that?
Ellemerr: This was fun. Treat Dave well. I'll read later. Sweet nightmares.
Apheori (GM): Dream well.
Poor Dave.
Bear Soup Guy: Bye Ellemerr
Radek: Yes. Always.
Gaurav: Byeeeeee!
Sleep well!
Greibel: I wonder where she goes when she isn't with us.
The Gravedigger: To bed?
Greibel: Well, you got me there
Dave: Do you do that?
Greibel: Go to bed? Almost every day.
Radek: Bah.
Rhu: She appeared in one of these tanks just now, and said she'd done it before.
Radek: Sleeping is such a waste of time.
Rhu: I don't know if that means anything.
Greibel: Oh, she was here before.
Ganelon: I have time for one.
Apheori (GM): Is there time for an encounter?
Greibel: She was in the tank and then she left, and then she came back in the tank again.
I think she likes the tank a lot.
Frezak (GM): I do.
Bear Soup Guy: Yep
Frezak (GM): I HEREBY NAME YOU HIPPIE AND GRUMP
UNTIL 0 HP DO YOU PART
Gaurav: Hehe
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Gaurav: I have to leave in 25 mins, so ... maybe?
Apheori (GM): Frezak: Can you get me some stats for the warforged by any chance?
Because it's about to flip out and attack Radek.
Frezak (GM): uh
yeah
Apheori (GM): *kitty eyes*
Frezak (GM): How tough?
Ganelon: Don't give her ideas.
Gaurav: Today is a day for being attacked by animals we love
At least Rasputin is reliable
Apheori (GM): It ain't solo.
Greibel strokes Rasputin
Gaurav: I gotta run for a sec, but I'll be back in 5 mins
Apheori (GM): There will be four other baddies and Dave may put the sphinx down, so it can't be too tough. >.>
Bear Soup Guy: Oh dear
It's those skellingtons, ain't it?
Apheori (GM): Maybe.
Bear Soup Guy: I love it when skellingtons just suddenly become alive ^_^
Frezak (GM): Sneding.
It's an L2 elite, so it's tough but not massively.
Gaurav: "put the sphinx down"?
Frezak (GM): That's like "throwing down the gauntlet" ?
Ganelon: One of each.
Gaurav: more huggy skelingtons!
Bear Soup Guy: Someone remind me again while we're waiting
Ganelon: Standard, move, minor.
Bear Soup Guy: How many actions of which type per turn?
Ganelon: You can turn a standard into a move and a move into a minor.
So, until I took a certain feat for example, Radek reloading his weapon was a minor.
Yes.
Gaurav: Plus, we all have one action point each at this point (I think?) which lets you do one more standard action in your turn
Ganelon: He could fire it, reload, and then move.
Or he could skip moving to toss a healing thing at someone.
Frezak (GM): I think Rhu swears his oath as a minor and Greibel changes shape as a minor.
Bear Soup Guy: Yep
I also have, uh
Verdant Bounty?
Ganelon: Oh, I remember that one being cool.
Bear Soup Guy: Wait, that's a utility power
Ganelon: What's it do again?
Bear Soup Guy: Oh it gives us all +5 stealth
Frezak (GM): Wow.
that's great.
Gaurav: Damn.
Frezak (GM): Since we're super bad at stealth.
Bear Soup Guy: By covering us with inconspicuous plantlife
Frezak (GM): QUICKLY
Bear Soup Guy: Yeah
Frezak (GM): COVER YOURSELF WITH THESE LEAVES
Bear Soup Guy: NO ONE WILL NOTICE
Frezak (GM): WE SHALL BE BUSHES IN PLAIN SIGHT
Gaurav: "Hey, where did those guys go? And where did those potted plants come from?"
To be fair, we're fighting skelingtons. They literally don't have a brain.
Bear Soup Guy: True
Frezak (GM): The Warforged does.
Gaurav: Also, back when Rhu wandered over to the tanks, he was going to go examine the skellingtons instead, and I'm so glad he didn't.
Bear Soup Guy: re-animated skellingtons are definitely a desired outcome
Frezak (GM): Yeah.
Bear Soup Guy: Oh bloody hell, I've forgotten proneness, combat advantage and marking too
This is actually going to be the first combat I'm involved in since our practice session
Gaurav: don't stress about it
Frezak (GM): Oh, yeah.
We have a great combo, don't we?
With the wolves?
Ganelon: You do.
Apheori (GM): Dumbarse of a computer.
Sorry.
Trying to download it.
Gaurav: almost everything is a +2 one way or another. Prone: people get a +2 to melee you, -2 to shoot you from a distance. Combat advantage: when someone is flanked, opponents get a +2 against them. Marking: usually the marker gets to make an opportunity attack if the markee shoots someone except the person who marked them, but it can vary. Unless you're makring, you don't need to worry about it.
Ganelon: Well, marks also mean a -2 to attacks that don't include the marker.
Gaurav: Since I have to go in 10 mins, feel free to come up with a reason for getting Rhu out of the fight -- maybe he fell into a tank and fell unconscious? Or he stepped out into the hallway and the door locked behind him? I don't mind missing an encounter, and we have Dave to make up for me.
Frezak (GM): Well, maybe we should run it next time.
Apheori (GM): Ghah, sorry.
Frezak (GM): I could talk with Names about making it a balanced encounter.
Numbers and all that.
Apheori (GM): Hee.
Gaurav: Names, Numbers and all that
Ellemerr: What, are you going to make it so that I can join the combat? You are so cruel.
Gaurav: sounds like a sitcom
Frezak (GM): Mathemagics.
Gaurav: hahaha
Frezak (GM): You CAN. Don't HAVE to.
Apheori (GM): Unless someone else wants to cover for Gaurav.
Frezak (GM): I don't have anyone's sheets but mine and the merr's.
Gaurav: My sheet is ... complicated
Doesn't Dave have a sheet?
Apheori (GM): She does. It's rather depressing
.
Gaurav: My sheet: https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u/19429772/dnd-skype/Rhu.pdf
Hers is probably easier to understand than mine.
Apheori (GM): I can understand hers. >.>
Gaurav: Another option: class ends at 4:45pm MT (1.5 hours from now). I could be back online within 5-10 mins of that.
Bear Soup Guy: I could be here at that time
Frezak (GM): I... could do that.
Gaurav: I wish I could sit at the back and play in class, but ... there's like seven people in this class. It'd be pretty obvious.
Frezak (GM): It'd be... 1 in the morning, though.
So I could do the encounter then slouch off.
THis is a hideous sheet.
Gaurav: It's cheap.
There's only about four powers in there, though: maybe if Frezak has half an hour to peruse it, he can figure out how to play Rhu and then you guys could start in 30 mins instead of 90?
The salient details are:
Avenger
Censure of Pursuit
Gaurav: Training: acrobatics, heal, perception, religion
Feats:
- Invigorating Pursuit (+2 AC, +2 damage until end of next turn when you hit your oath of enmity target with a damage roll)
- (at level 2) Improved Armor of Faith (+1 bonus to AC)
Gaurav: At-will powers:
- Bond of Retribution
- Radiant Vengeance
(-) Might want to switch to Bond of Pursuit at some point?
Encounter:
Gaurav: - Whirlwind Charge
Daily:
- Renewing Strike
Utility:
Gaurav: - Resonant Escape
The sheet should already have all the +s to AC added in. You really only need to remember the Invigorating Pursuit and the powers.
Apheori (GM): Hrrngh I need proper skeletons. >.<
Ellemerr: You have an hour of Frezak to sort it out, don't you?
Frezak (GM): The best kind of hour.
Gaurav: Heh. Okay, class time! I'll be back in 1.5 hours or slightly earlier to finish what we started here.
If somebody could please drop me an e-mail if we're NOT playing then, I'd really appreciate it --> gaurav@ggvaidya.com
(you can also find me on Facebook with that e-mail address if you are so inclined)
see you later today or Tuesday!
Bear Soup Guy: Adios gaur!
Ellemerr: Dream well.
Apheori (GM): Rigt.
h
Gaurav: HULLO
Frezak (GM): HELLO
Apheori (GM): AHAHAH.
Ganelon: Hey.
Gaurav: o.0
Bear Soup Guy: Sadistic laugh!
Apheori (GM): I mean, Ahah.
Gaurav: so
Frezak (GM): So!
Gaurav: A needle pulling thread
Let's do this
There are skellingtons to unskelling.
Bear Soup Guy: a ton of skellings
Frezak (GM): All the skelling.
Apheori (GM): Right, so.
Frezak (GM): BUCKETS
Gaurav: And then I can go and eat delicious food and be extraordinarily productive for the next 4 hours until movie time
Apheori (GM): So what's Radek doing?
Frezak (GM): Being poked by Gravy.
Until he raises Cybermouse.
Bear Soup Guy: Who shall then bring on the cheesepocalypse
Frezak (GM): Rodentolypse.
Ganelon: What's he doing?
He's probably looking at the inactive body of this here rodent 'bot.
Frezak (GM): And being prodded now and then.
Bear Soup Guy: Maybe he forgot to release the handbrake
Gaurav: mousebrake
Frezak (GM): RELEASE THE MANDRAKE
Apheori (GM): Radek: Do something.
Frezak (GM): Reroute power!
The limbic system is superfluous!
It doesn't need the aetheric dampeners either.
Ganelon: Does inspecting the body count?
Frezak (GM): And the Gnosis Engine isn't even plugged in.
Come on, man.
DO SCIENCE
Apheori (GM): It starts twitching.
Radek: Ahah!
The Gravedigger: Mr MOUSIE
The sphinx jumps down and sits on it.
The Gravedigger: Hey!
You get off Mr Mousie!
The sphinx rolls off the mouseforged and starts sliding around the floor on its back.
Gaurav:
rolling 1d20+12 perception check on these tanks while those people do strange terrible things
(
3
)
+12
=
15
"mouseforged" HA perfect
Apheori (GM): http://25.media.tumblr.com/9297925c9a2f35c96cf092ec337ff268/tumblr_mrsany0Umc1rsjozoo5_400.gif
LIKE SO.
Frezak came up with that. Mouseforged.
Gaurav: Apheori: your database of cat gifs is frightening
Apheori (GM): Someome made a post full of them.
Ganelon: You would think the wings might get in the way.
Apheori (GM): And i just thought SPHINX.
It uses the wings to move.
Gaurav: Do you have a link to that post?
Apheori (GM): Well, move more.
Your perception discerns that they're all the same size and Gravy wouldn't fit in one.
Gaurav: I can believe that. A study in the UK found that tying a bell around a cat's neck made no difference to its ability to hunt. Cats are frightening creatures.
No hints of what the tanks might have been originally intended for, or what they're intended for here?
Apheori (GM): http://lionsilverwolf.tumblr.com/post/59177122258/cageyshick05-221cbakerstreet
The Gravedigger: Come on, Mr Mousie!
Apheori (GM): They're there to hold things!
The Gravedigger: You can do it!
Radek: It might take some time for him to comprehend bipedal movement.
Or, really, anything else about this new body.
Apheori (GM): The mouseforged roars and starts flailing about.
The Gravedigger: Calm down, Mr Mousie!
The Gravedigger makes soothing mouse noises*
Apheori (GM): It bounces a bit away.
Then it stops and starts to get up.
And then falls over.
Frezak (GM): I'll try to help it up.
Rhu walks back to the group
Rhu: So this is a sentient gollem, then?
Radek: Only if you consider a mouse sentient.
Apheori (GM): Gravy gets it onto its feet. It stands there swaying for a moment, and then swings at him.
The sphinx, meanwhile, flips out and runs away.
The Gravedigger: Hey!
Bad Mousie!
Rhu: (to Dave, re: the sphinx) Do you think he's okay?
Dave: Is this not normal behaviour?
Radek: Well, ah...
Rhu: I don't kn-- what the?
Apheori (GM): Sorry, icons are hard.
Radek: They're built for combat, but aren't necessarily motivated to attack people.
Gaurav: The flamey one was fun.
Rhu: Oh, hey, you got the robot working.
Radek: Of course I did.
Apheori (GM): You hear groaning.
Gaurav: From where?
Apheori (GM): The dead bloated elf is suddenly getting up too.
The Gravedigger: This looks bad.
SHOVEL TIME
Rhu: Er ...
Apheori (GM): The the sphinx runs away from something... back toward the mouse.
Greibel: Ummm
The Gravedigger: HAVE AT THEE, MONSTER
Greibel: They're with you, right Dave?
Apheori (GM): Initiative everyone.
Dave: With?
I'm afraid I have no idea what's going on.
Rhu:
rolling d20+3
(
16
)
+3
=
19
Greibel:
rolling 1d20+1
(
17
)
+1
=
18
Ganelon: I think...
Yeah, these tokens are using outdated health stuff.
Frezak (GM): 9
Ganelon: Or at least mine is. It should be level 2.
rolling 1d20+1
(
3
)
+1
=
4
Greibel: You have to change your token's thingies, I think
Ganelon: I tried. It won't save.
Greibel: O_o
Frezak (GM): You have full permissions.
Dave:
rolling 1d20 +1
(
9
)
+1
=
10
Bear Soup Guy: Permitted to KICK ASS
Ganelon: I'm tellin' you.
It's stuck on 23.
There we go.
Apheori (GM): How do you figure out what something's initiative bonus is?
Frezak (GM): Dex mod + 1/2 level.
Ganelon: Monster stats should have it near the top.
Otherwise, that.
Frezak (GM): Also that.
Gaurav: Do I need to do something to add myself to the turn order?
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20-1
(
2
)
-1
=
1
Ganelon: No, that's on the DM.
Gaurav: cool, thanks!
Frezak (GM): Actually, there's a macro for you do it yourself.
Bear Soup Guy: Mouse golem is clearly disoriented
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 + 8
(
20
)
+8
=
28
rolling 1d20 + 7
(
16
)
+7
=
23
Bear Soup Guy: And the sphinx is cool as the other side of the pillow, awwww yeah
Gaurav: lightning-fast reflexes
Apheori (GM): Dude, you have no idea.
rolling 1d20 + 4
(
4
)
+4
=
8
rolling 1d20 + 4
(
7
)
+4
=
11
rolling 1d20 + 4
(
13
)
+4
=
17
Gaurav: Cat goes first
Frezak (GM): CAT
INVOKE THE DARK GODS
Bear Soup Guy: as it should be
Apheori (GM): Oh gods.
The cat runs away.
Frezak (GM): Thanks, cat.
Apheori (GM): Next.
Oh.
Mousie.
Rhu gives Devourer a disappointed look
Bear Soup Guy: "You had such promise! You were the chosen one!"
Frezak (GM): Mousie!
Help me defeat these abominations!
USE SCIENCE TO DEFEND NATURE
Apheori (GM): Mouseforged attacks Gravy.
Frezak (GM): nooooooooooooo
Gaurav: >.<
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 +8 vs ac
(
15
)
+8
=
23
Frezak (GM): oh, yeah.
I only have 20 AC.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d6 + 4
(
3
)
+4
=
7
Frezak (GM): ow
Apheori (GM): Then it runs away too.
Gaurav: Like cat like mouse
Frezak (GM): What kind of move?
Apheori (GM): Flailing.
Frezak (GM): Is it a shift?
Apheori (GM): No.
Frezak (GM): Then I WILL STRIKE IT DOWN
rolling 1D20+9
(
4
)
+9
=
13
VS AC
Or... not.
Apheori (GM): Miss.
Frezak (GM): Gorram.
Apheori (GM): It's now with the sphinx.
Rhu: Okay. On the plus side, everything seems to be running away from us.
Ganelon: Do your ridiculous anti-undead thing!
Apheori (GM): Wait, how do auras work, again?
Ganelon: If you're in it, it is affecting you.
If it applies a thing, that thing is applied at the start of your turn.
So you could run past a guy with an aura that's like "do 5 damage" and not be hurt.
Apheori (GM): Tosh.
Ganelon: But I'm pretty sure if it's like "you get a penalty to attacks", that applies right away.
Is that correct?
Frezak (GM): It specifies in the aura when it applies.
Apheori (GM): Ah.
Rhu: Gan: I think I should hold on to my encounter powers until we know which are the most powerful foes here.
Frezak (GM): Zombies tend to have more HP.
Typically.
Being meatier.
Bear Soup Guy: Oh, quick question
Frezak (GM): Maybe go solo the skeleton behind the desk?
Bear Soup Guy: With encounter powers, is it each encounter power can only be used once per, or only one of any encounter power?
Frezak (GM): Each.
Gaurav: Gah. I didn't see the skeleton behind us.
Ganelon: Each one, only once.
Bear Soup Guy: Right-o cool
Ganelon: And yes, saving encounter powers is potentially a good tactical decision.
Unless you're a monk.
Frezak (GM): What are the requirements for you to get your oath reroll, Rhu?
Ganelon: The gates of battle wait for no man.
Frezak (GM): Or Kobold.
Gaurav: As far as I know, I can't switch oath targets until my oath target reaches 0 HP
Frezak (GM): But what are the conditions for it to be useful?
It's something about isolation.
Can't recall if it's no other allies, or no other enemies.
Apheori (GM): How do you get health bars?
Gaurav: no other enemies
Frezak (GM): You go into the monster properties and add the second number next to it.
Then go for the guy beinhd the desk.
Ganelon: The token needs a max health value as well as a current.
Apheori (GM): Monster properties?
Gaurav: if I melee my oath target while there is no other enemy next to me, I can roll two attack dies and use either result
Ganelon: If you want us to see it too, then you need to make sure "show" is on.
Token properties.
Frezak (GM): Token properties.
Apheori (GM): How do you get to it?
Ganelon: Click on a token and then the gear.
Apheori (GM): Ah. >.<
Gaurav: I thought you normally only know enemy's "bloodied" status? getting their actual HP would help our strategy a LOT.
which would make the encounter less fun imo
Frezak (GM): Nah, we don't get to know that.
Apheori (GM): What are green and blue?
Ganelon: Well, an HP bar is measured in percentages.
Whatever you want, miss.
Gaurav: oh I see, its not visible to us
cool
Ganelon: And also.
Frezak (GM): You put what you like for whatever colour.
Ganelon: They don't need to have us see the bar.
I've done GM stuff in this interface too and you can make the bars only visible to you.
Frezak (GM): I tend to use a red bar for HP, blue number is monster XP value, green is AP (if any)
Apheori (GM): Okay.
RHU. DO STUFF.
Gaurav: Aye aye cap'n
Move: 3 squares
Actually, make that four squares
Frezak (GM): TEAM
GANK
SLAY!
Gaurav: hahahaha
Frezak (GM): MURRRRRDER
Gaurav: is this a flank?
Frezak (GM): Nope.
Flank is having someone on the opposite side
Gaurav: Minor: Oath of Enmity against the corpulent elf
Rhu: Fuck you, elf.
Frezak (GM): That's some oath :P
Gaurav: Standard: I lift up my maul and attack the elf with the Bond of Retribution
Bear Soup Guy: I might be a minute, my neighbor is here wanting me to do some stupid thing
Frezak (GM): KILL THE NEIGHBOUR
Bear Soup Guy: KILL THE NEIGHBOUR
Frezak (GM): KILL THE NEIGHBOUR
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+5 Wisdom vs AC
(
17
)
+5
=
22
Gaurav: KILL THE WABBIT
er
neighbour
Apheori (GM): Hits.
Gaurav: Coulda rerolled it if it hadn't :)
Frezak (GM): KILL WABBIT NEIGHBOUR
Gaurav:
rolling 2d6+4 radiant damage
(
2
+
5
)
+4
=
11
Frezak (GM): RADIANT
Delicious.
Apheori (GM): You hurt it.
Gaurav: the first time an enemy other than the elf hits or misses me BEFORE the end of my next turn, the target takes +2 radiant damage
Apheori (GM): What's the emphasis on before for?
Gaurav: just to remind me of when it expires
Frezak (GM): Because it's important.
Gaurav: "end" is more important than "before" in that sentence, I guess
okay, I'm done
Apheori (GM): Is Rob back?
Frezak (GM): Oh, yeah. BSG has a name, too.
Gaurav: Oh, in case I forget, I also gain a bonus if my oath target (the elf) moves away from me willingly
Frezak (GM): niice
Gaurav: OH also
Frezak (GM): Avengers, man.
Bear Soup Guy: Okay sorry, I'm back
Gaurav: every time I hit my oath target, I get AC +2 and damage +2 until the end of my next turn
whee!
Frezak (GM): Man.
Ganelon: So there's where all the strikerness comes from.
Apheori (GM): Pity the sphinx started out freaked out.
It could totally have countered that.
Frezak (GM): So, what can Greibel do?
Gaurav: SAVE THE DAY
Bear Soup Guy: I'm thinking I'll move down a couple squares and range attack some skellingtons?
or move right
Frezak (GM): Don't you have that dicky firehawk thing?
Gaurav: "dicky firehawk"?
Bear Soup Guy: I do have that dicky firehawk thing
Frezak (GM): DICKBIRD OF FLAME
What's your other at-will?
Ganelon: Okay, imagine a hawk made of fire.
Frezak (GM): It's a flaming winged penis.
Bear Soup Guy: and I also have Fairie Fire which can fuck some enemies up
Ganelon: And it's the most despicable jerk you've ever known.
Gaurav: o.0
Ganelon: That's the Firehawk.
Gaurav: Do you have any area attacks? It'd be great to hit either corner with that
Frezak (GM): Can you slow things?
Gaurav: Or if you can set up a defensive barrier
Bear Soup Guy: I have so many attacks
Let me see
Gaurav: Is BSG's character sheet online somewhere?
Bear Soup Guy: Firehawk and Thorn Whip are range 10 at will
Frezak (GM): Yeah, bring out the bird.
Hurt something!
Bear Soup Guy: HURT
Frezak (GM): PAIn
FLAME
GAME
Gaurav: Wait.
Bear Soup Guy: MOVING THREE SQUARES
Gaurav: I don't think you should move right in between two sets of enemies
Bear Soup Guy: Well that's a good point
Frezak (GM): The mouseforged is fleeing.
Or, was.
Ganelon: No, it's flailing.
Gaurav: Right, but we're blocking its path to the door somewhat. It might panic and run the other way.
Frezak (GM): It's a mouse.
It's really no smart.
Bear Soup Guy: Okay, now I'm here and protected by sciency tanks that totally won't blow up when I fling a fire bird past them
Frezak (GM): It might try to hide under a table.
Totes.
Trust teh tanks.
Gaurav: oooh
that'll be fun
Frezak (GM): DICKFIREBIRD
Bear Soup Guy: RIGHT
So
rolling 1d20+5 I think
(
16
)
+5
=
21
Apheori (GM): Excellent point.
Whazzat do?
Bear Soup Guy: It's to check for a hit I think
Frezak (GM): IT BURNS
ALSO DICKS.
Apheori (GM): Against what?
Gaurav: It should say something like "Wisdom vs AC"
Bear Soup Guy: Oh right
Ganelon: Did you pick a target?
Bear Soup Guy: The skellington standing above the other one
Apheori (GM): Mr. Headless.
It hits.
Gaurav: heh. "The skellington dancing right instead of left"
Bear Soup Guy: indeed
Ganelon: Man, I'll bet he uses the firehawk to light his smokes, too.
Bear Soup Guy: YAY HIT
=D
rolling 1d8+4
(
1
)
+4
=
5
Oh bollocks
And it's uh...wisdom vs. reflex
Frezak (GM): You hit, that's the important thing.
Bear Soup Guy: YAY HIT
Gaurav: Yeah, 5 isn't bad
Bear Soup Guy: Okay and I have that other secondary attack
Ganelon: Now he can make the same attack again if the target does anything that would provoke an opportunity attack.
Frezak (GM): So, if it makes a non-shift move or a ranged attack, he gets to firebird it again.
Bear Soup Guy: http://gyazo.com/033ab9766f613f6a99bd3a9d54e8e095
Ah okay cool
And I don't have any minors other than turning into an animal, unless we all need +5 stealth for some reason
Gaurav: Don't ranged attacks only give you an opportunity attack if you're standing next to it?
Frezak (GM): Yep.
But the bid sort of counts as a creature next to the target.
Except you can't attack it.
Bear Soup Guy: the opp is ranged too also
if that means anything
Frezak (GM): Because it's a flying, flaming dick.
Apheori (GM): A shift is one square, right?
Frezak (GM): yep.
Apheori (GM): Done, then?
Bear Soup Guy: Yeah, that should do for that turn
Apheori (GM): So it moves, so you get an attack.
Frezak (GM): Flaaaames
Bear Soup Guy: Wheeeeeeeeeeee
rolling 1d20+5 vs. reflex (that IS relevant, right?)
(
1
)
+5
=
6
Frezak (GM): Gah!
Bear Soup Guy: NOOOOOOOOOOO
Frezak (GM): GET BETTER DICKBIRDFLAMES
Bear Soup Guy: They need dickbirdflame cialis
Apheori (GM): You wrecked your bird. >.<
Gaurav: Greibel would have launched this second attack when the skeleton started moving, right?
Frezak (GM): Yes.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 + 6
(
18
)
+6
=
24
Frezak (GM): aaaagh
doom skeletons!
Apheori (GM): Er, that was +5, not 6. vs fortitude.
Gaurav: Oh, but if the bird is separate from him, then launching a ranged attack won't give the skeleton a +2 anyway. Never mind.
Bear Soup Guy: that's a hit
Gaurav: vs *fortitude*?! yikes.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d6 + 2
(
3
)
+2
=
5
5 damage and pushed back a square.
Frezak (GM): oof
BLUDGERS
Gaurav: What is that attack called? It looks like fun. And by fun I mean "ow".
Apheori (GM): Forward the Line
Gaurav: nice
Frezak (GM): IT LOOKS LIKE PAIN
Bear Soup Guy: It's quick bracing
quite rather
Apheori (GM): So other skeleton moves up to Greibel and tries to stab him.
rolling 1d20 + 6 vs ac
(
6
)
+6
=
12
Bear Soup Guy: Miss
Gaurav: yay!
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Frezak (GM): Nimble drug dodge.
go with the flowwwww
Apheori (GM): Dave blasts the skeletons with fuck if she knows what.
Gaurav: Wait. What's Dave's AC like?
Can she get into people's faces or does she need to hang back?
Apheori (GM): She doesn't know.
Neither do you.
Gaurav: ah, fun
oh well, one way to find out!
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 + 8
(
2
)
+8
=
10
rolling 1d20 + 8
(
4
)
+8
=
12
Ganelon: Well, unless she's a monk or vampire, odds are the lack armor means her AC is pretty bad.
Apheori (GM): She misses both.
Ganelon: Lack of armor.
Apheori (GM): Yeah, her armour's probably still in the box.
Gravy.
You're up.
Gaurav: So it looks like Skellington The Third is going to sneak in and attack Radek and Dave before they can respond. Which is fine, as long as Rhu, Gravy and Greibel can keep the others out of the central area.
Frezak (GM): Greibel dodge.
http://flakypastry.runningwithpencils.com/comic.php?strip_id=379
Ganelon: I'm pretty okay in close quarters.
Frezak (GM): OKAY.
Gaurav: Frezak: hahaHA
Ganelon: For a guy who uses a long-range rifle, at least.
Frezak (GM): I sould go run help Greibel?
I'm best at standing in the thick of things.
Gaurav: If you're sure the cat and the mouse are just going to sit in the corner, then that's totally fine. Otherwise, we might want to hold the line here.
Frezak (GM): Hmm.
Bear Soup Guy: Yeah, I think the stuff up there is probably more pressing than the lowly skellingtons
Frezak (GM): Right-o.
I'll mark the zomble.
And then bring forth the Weight Of Earth.
rolling 1D20+7
(
6
)
+7
=
13
VS AC.
gorram.
Frezak (GM): Apparently the earth isn't that weighty.
Apheori (GM): So close.
Gaurav: this is an at-will, right?
Frezak (GM): yup
It just slows.
Gaurav: I can let you re-roll an attack against my oath target, but only once per encounter
Frezak (GM): Nah, not worth it.
The important thing is the Mark.
Turn over.
So it has -2 to attacks that don't include me.
Apheori (GM): The other skeleton tries to climb over the desk.
It doesn't work. It falls on the ground on the other side.
Gaurav: ha HA
Apheori (GM): Radek.
Bear Soup Guy: Silly skeleton
Ganelon: Hm.
Gaurav: is the skeleton prone?
Apheori (GM): Yes.
This icon?
Frezak (GM): OOOOH
yes
Ganelon: What do you guys think?
Gaurav: What are the two icons on the elf? Which one is the Mark?
Frezak (GM): BOunce the skelly off Greibel.
Apheori (GM): Heart is mark.
Frezak (GM): Swords seemed oath-y
Ganelon: Okay then.
Gaurav: do you have area attacks?
Ganelon: Nah, that's not a very leader-y thing to do.
I have attacks that buff people, heals, and can hit stuff from ridiculous ranges if need be.
Frezak (GM): Thunderise the stoner.
With Rhu, we have this guy locked down.
Ganelon: I also have the eyebot which basically just gives you damage for doing damage.
Okay.
[Implement Attack]
rolling 1d20+5+1+0
(
9
)
+5+1+0
=
15
It's that against fortitude.
Apheori (GM): Works.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d8+5 Force
(
1
)
+5
=
6
That much Greibel gets a +1 to his AC until the end of my next turn, and the skelly gets pushed 1.
Gaurav: How's your HP? You could move between Dave and Greibel so they can keep you safe from opportunity attacks.
Ganelon: In this case push him down 1.
Thanks.
Gaurav: nice!
Ganelon: Radek actually has respectable AC.
He can take a hit.
Gaurav: sweet.
Ganelon: So I'll sit here.
And end turn.
Apheori (GM): Hiding behind the unarmoured lass?
Frezak (GM): COME GET SOME, ZOMBIE.
Ganelon: Hiding?
The prone skelly can't stand and attack in the same turn.
Apheori (GM): Zombie tries to slam Gravy.
Ganelon: Either it's got a -2 to hit her or she's totally safe.
Gaurav: If things get bad, we'll need Radek alive so he can keep us alive. We don't knw if Dave can help us there yet.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 + 6
(
10
)
+6
=
16
vs ac
Frezak (GM): Nope.
I mock it's feeble attempt.
The Gravedigger: Thbrrrrrt
Apheori (GM): Zombie emits a horrible smell.
Rhu: Ugh.
Frezak (GM): SMELLL
AAGH
Apheori (GM): All of you next to it can now take a -2 penalty to attack rolls because of the horrible smell.
Frezak (GM): ew
Bear Soup Guy: Insidious!
Gaurav: Save ends?
Frezak (GM): Sounds like an aura 1, since it didn't roll.
Apheori (GM): That.
Gaurav: Hm.
Apheori (GM): But it might go away again. It wasn't an issue before.
Frezak (GM): Hmm.
Gaurav: Cat and mouse time.
Apheori (GM): Yup.
Cat walks past a bunch of things.
Problem is I'm not sure how this works.
Basically it's going to trip everything it passes - what would determine if it works?
Frezak (GM): It'd have to make an attack.
Unless you just decide that it can't be evaded/resisted.
Apheori (GM): Hmm.
Gaurav: Couldn't the things it passes make opportunity attacks on it as it goes by?
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Gaurav: Do opportunity attacks during movement end the move?
Ganelon: No.
Frezak (GM): Nah.
Ganelon: Only Fighters can do that.
Frezak (GM): That.
Well, and me.
Since my oppie prones.
Gaurav: WOAH
nice
Frezak (GM): Yeah.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 + 10
(
2
)
+10
=
12
rolling 1d20 + 10
(
4
)
+10
=
14
So zombie and mouseforged both saved.
How does the zombie oppotunity attack?
Halp.
Is an opportunity attack just a normal attack?
Frezak (GM): It's a power with a circle around the icon
For him, it's Slam.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 + 6 vs ac on the sphinx...
(
12
)
+6
=
18
Okay, sphinx continues., weaving through everyone's legs.
Gravy: Do you want to attack the sphinx?
Frezak (GM): Yes.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: Same question.
Gaurav: Yes.
Frezak (GM): HAH
Apheori (GM): Great. Opportunity attacks from both of you.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+9-2
(
1
)
+9-2
=
8
VS AC
gah!
Gaurav: That's just a basic weapon melee attack, right?
Frezak (GM): I'm so bad.
Yes.
Gaurav:
rolling d20+3 vs AC
(
13
)
+3
=
16
Frezak (GM): and -2 from stench.
Apheori (GM): Nope.
Gaurav: ah yes that too
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 + 10
(
15
)
+10
=
25
Frezak (GM): uh-oh.
Apheori (GM): vs reflex on gravy
Frezak (GM): *thud*
Gaurav: woah
what just happened?
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 + 10 vs reflex on Rhu
(
14
)
+10
=
24
Sphinx tripped him.
Gaurav: ha, not even close
am I tripped too?
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Gaurav: too bad Devourer didn't trip the elf too
Frezak (GM): This cat is nothing but pain.
Apheori (GM): The sphinx will now sit on the proned skeleton's face.
And... uh... grin at Geibel.
Rhu: Hey, Dave! Can you get that crazy cat under control?
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 + 5 vs will
(
11
)
+5
=
16
The Gravedigger: This cat is getting very upsetting.
Apheori (GM): But the grin has no effect on Greibel.
Rhu: He seems scared. This is not a good time to be scared, though.
Dave: What just happened?
The Gravedigger: That cat is trying to get us killed, that's what.
Apheori (GM): Mouseforged will... run up to the zombie and attack it.
Gaurav: Would the trip count as a "hit or miss"?
Frezak (GM): Um.
Probably.
Gaurav: I think not, since I assume hit or miss implies a damage roll
Frezak (GM): No, hit or miss is an attack roll.
Gaurav: on the other hand, we need all the help we can get
okay, then
the sphinx gets +2 radiant damage
Frezak (GM): Hah!
Apheori (GM): It may kill you some day.
Gaurav: because of my bond of retribution against the elf
Frezak (GM): I might try and kill IT before it kills us all.
Ganelon: We could attempt to trick it with explosives.
Frezak (GM): Shh, you.
Gaurav: strictly speaking, the attack came from my previous attack, not from me.
but I don't suppose the cat cares for such subtleties
Frezak (GM): Actually... wrap the bomb in a storybook.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 + 8 vs ac on zombie...
(
12
)
+8
=
20
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d6 + 4
(
4
)
+4
=
8
Gaurav: Yay!
Frezak (GM): And i'll hit what's left with a shovel until it stops moving.
Apheori (GM): Rhu.
Frezak (GM): STAND UP AND KILL THIS THING
Rhu: Okay, so: should I focus on the zombie or double back and help with the skellingtons?
Frezak (GM): Kill this.
Bear Soup Guy: I'm planning to use my daily on the skellingtons
Frezak (GM): Hey, you get a flank with Mousie.
Rhu: okay. but not yet time for encounter attacks yet, right?
Bear Soup Guy: Which will either be piss weak or soul-shattering
Frezak (GM): Sure, use Encounter powers.
Rhu: are you sure? that was a very weak attack from it last time. I think the skellintons are going to be more challenging. And Hazz'ridan help us if we can't control the cat.
Apheori (GM): With flanks, do things need to be allies?
Gaurav: Standing up is ... a minor?
Frezak (GM): Nope, thing just needs to be an enemy of your target.
Move action to stand.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Gaurav: I can dream.
Move action: stand up.
Standard action: Abjure Undead
this only works if this guy is undead btw
Apheori (GM): This is what the cat did with everyone's legs, incidentally. http://31.media.tumblr.com/649a146c2b13764bd9af9af575962275/tumblr_mrsany0Umc1rsjozoo1_400.gif
Gaurav: Fancy.
Apheori (GM): And no, I swear I am not trying to incorporate the entire gifset into this.
It's undead.
Whatsit
?
Gaurav:
rolling d20+5 wisdom vs will
(
8
)
+5
=
13
-2 for stench, +2 for flank, I think?
Apheori (GM): Don't hit.
Ganelon: Reroll it!
Frezak (GM): OATH POWA
Gaurav: I can't do a free reroll, since that's only for melee attacks. I can spend my encounter power which lets any of us reroll against my oath of enmity.
Frezak (GM): damn.
Ganelon: Well, this is a big hitting power, no?
Gaurav: ordinarily, I'd say, yea, because this attack is really good (3d10). But! It works half-damage on fails. (3d10/2 should be good enoguh, right?)
Frezak (GM): Yeah, save the reroll.
Gaurav: excellent
so on miss, I do half damage and pull the target 1 square
rolling 3d10+4 half damage
(
3
+
6
+
3
)
+4
=
16
+2 damage from invigorating pursuit
Frezak (GM): oh, wow!
Apheori (GM): It's dead.
Frezak (GM): splat!
Gaurav: hehehehehe
god I love this power
AAAAAND i still have a minor left
who should I oath of enmity now?
I don't want to oath the cat
Apheori (GM): Bahahah.
No, you really don't.
Frezak (GM): Not yet.
Ganelon: I'm tempted to say "the cat just so it knows what's up", but yeah.
Apheori (GM): It WILL kill you.
...unless it doesn't.
Frezak (GM): I'd just be happy with it fucking us up.
Or... not fucking us up.
That would also be nice.
Gaurav: Can I set up the minor on a trigger? Like, can I say I invoke it on the next skeleton to attack any of us?
okay wait hang on
Ganelon: Nah, that would take a standard.
Gaurav: I did 10 damage to the elf
Ganelon: But if you do it to the next skeleton in the initiative order, that's nearly the same.
Gaurav: not 14. you have to take half of that.
not 16* (half + 2)
Apheori (GM): Hmph.
Frezak (GM): And another 5.
because radiant.
Apheori (GM): HOW MUCH DAMAGE WAS IT?
Frezak (GM): 10 radiant.
Gaurav: oh?
Frezak (GM): It should have vulnerable.. 5.
Gaurav: 10 radiant confirmed
Frezak (GM): So end damage would be 15.
Apheori (GM): What.
Half of ten?
Or ten after it's half?
Or half of 15?
Frezak (GM): Ten after it was halved.
Apheori (GM): Ten total?
Including vulnerability
Gaurav: I rolled 16 radiant damage. Half of that is 8. Then I added a +2 because of other effects. So 10 radiant damage.
Apheori (GM): ?
Frezak (GM): 15 total, including vulnerability.
Gaurav: I don't know about vulnerability.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
It's still alive, then.
Frezak (GM): Crud.
Gaurav: And I still have a minor.
Should I spend an action point and finish him?
Ganelon: We should be okay.
Frezak (GM): save it
Gaurav: Okay. Then I'll skip my minor. End of turn.
Apheori (GM): Greibel!
Bear Soup Guy: Okay!
Questions again (sorry)
http://gyazo.com/6f720919b620cb58764ce35b0797713f on this, am I right in assuming that if I cast this at one of those skellingtons, it will hit the other because it's within one, and also, if it does hit both, do I roll attack versus their will for each of them or just roll one and compare it to both?
Or not even roll it for the one getting the area effect
Frezak (GM): You roll one attack per target.
the area you target is a 3X3 zone with a center within 10 squares of you.
so you can do this
Bear Soup Guy: I WILL DO THIS
Ah, thank you disembodies box drawer!
Gaurav: once anybody uses a daily, we'll want to take a rest to recharge them, but that's probably a good idea at this point anyway
Bear Soup Guy: I figure we get into combat so little that it's probably not a huge deal to use it at this point
Ganelon: Too true.
Bear Soup Guy: Right, okay
rolling 1d20+5 vs will of skellington on the right
(
14
)
+5
=
19
rolling 1d20+5 vs will of skellinton on the left
(
12
)
+5
=
17
Apheori (GM): Bam bam.
Bear Soup Guy: Okay
rolling 3d6+4
(
2
+
2
+
4
)
+4
=
12
Ganelon: Whoa, whoa.
You don't do that yet.
Frezak (GM): what?
Bear Soup Guy: Bollocks!
Frezak (GM): He rolled, he hit, he rolled.
Ganelon: It's damage as an aftereffec.
Frezak (GM): What?
Bear Soup Guy: Oh dang
Good catch, so it is
Ganelon: The hit is "SE slowed and grants CA"
The aftereffect is 3d6.
Frezak (GM): Huh.
Bear Soup Guy: Yes
Ganelon: Meaning when they succeed against the slow, they get burned.
Gaurav: WOAH
Bear Soup Guy: That's still pretty cool anyway
Gaurav: that is dark magic
Apheori (GM): Slugs?
Ganelon: It is pretty cool.
Only trouble is, what if you want the damage now?
Frezak (GM): Bah, they're barely scratched.
Bear Soup Guy: So, do they need to succeed against the slow to do anything, or specific things?
Gaurav: This is one of those Greibel-turns-around-and-lights-a-cigarette, the-skeletons-slowly-walk-up-to-him,-then-fall-apart-as-the-aftereffect-hits kind of thing, huh
Bear Soup Guy: XD
That is just exactly what this is
Ganelon: When they succeed against the slow, it explodes
Bear Soup Guy: Yes, but what are the limitations of the slow
Ganelon: Oh.
Speed is 2.
Bear Soup Guy: And they roll to succeed?
Ganelon: At the end of each turn, they roll to stop being slowed.
Bear Soup Guy: Ah, okay. Got it
Ganelon: Everyone also has combat advantage against them, so +2 to hit.
Bear Soup Guy: So now I'll move a bit
And if they're still alive after they get burned, combat advantage again
Ganelon: Yep.
Really fun for rogues.
Bear Soup Guy hugs the power
Gaurav: Can you put an icon on them to remind us that we have combat advantage?
Apheori (GM): Skeleton goes after Radek, then.
What does combat advantage actually mean here?
Ganelon: COME GET ME
It means weird faerie fires are distracting the skellies from... defending themselves properly.
Gaurav: +2 to attack rolls, I think
Ganelon: Against them, yes.
Gaurav: ha, yes, that's an important distinction
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 +5 vs fort
(
18
)
+5
=
23
Ganelon: My old man fortitude is not greater than 23.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d6 + 2 damage, and pushes him back 1
(
5
)
+2
=
7
Other skeleton tries to do the same, then...
rolling 1d20 +5 vs fort
(
19
)
+5
=
24
Ganelon: Hold on.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Gaurav: eeks
Ganelon: First one rolls a d20.
Apheori (GM): Oh, right.
Ganelon: If it's 10 or more, it saves from the slow thing.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d2
(
1
)
=
1
Ganelon: That was a 1d2.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20
(
1
)
=
1
Ganelon: Fair enough.
Gaurav: haha
Bear Soup Guy: Which is an impossible die, by the way
Ganelon: It's a coin.
Bear Soup Guy: I guess a d2 is a co- yeah
Frezak (GM): Except coin has THE EDGE
Ganelon: Anyway, the second one is also a hit.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d6 + 2 damage, and pushes him back 1
(
2
)
+2
=
4
Frezak (GM): Dont worry, old man.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20
(
7
)
=
7
Frezak (GM): I got this.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Bear Soup Guy: That one tries to save too
Rhu: Dave! The cat!
Gaurav: Oh, right.
Ganelon: It did and failed.
Bear Soup Guy: Oh sorry, missed that
Apheori (GM): So Dave shoots the sphinx an annoyed look, but then tries blasting the skeletons again....
Does she get the combat advantage bonus too?
Ganelon: Yep.
Even enemies would.
Er.
Allies of the skeleton.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 + 6
(
14
)
+6
=
20
rolling 1d20 + 6
(
5
)
+6
=
11
Er, +2 for both, but that changes nothing.
Wait, what does 5 triangular symbol mean?
Blast.
Frezak (GM): What?
Ganelon: Meaning, it's a 5x5 but must be in a square adjacent to dave.
So like that.
Apheori (GM): Ah.
Gaurav: Oof. That is perfect.
Ganelon: It also doesn't provoke opportunity attacks.
Apheori (GM): So if she'd moved first she could have hit the other one too.
Ganelon: Does it target allies?
Apheori (GM): Naw.
Ganelon: Then yeah.
This would have worked if she shifted.
But whatever.
She's new to this.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d10 + 10
(
8
)
+10
=
18
Ganelon: +10?
Wow.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d10 + 5
(
8
)
+5
=
13
And then she shifts over to the sphinx and picks it up.
Gaurav: YAY
Apheori (GM): But first an attack of opportunity.
Wait, nevermind.
She shifted.
Gravy.
Frezak (GM): Move: stand.
I trust Rhu can finish this guy.
Gaurav: Especially if Mr. Mousie stays with us, yes.
Frezak (GM): Zombie makes an oppie as I being to charge.
*begin to charge
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 + 6
(
11
)
+6
=
17
ac
Frezak (GM): Too slow!
And I take a few steps...
and LEAP OVER RADEK.
Except I just charge through his square.
Goring charge on this skellington.
rolling 1D20+9+1+2
(
10
)
+9+1+2
=
22
Frezak (GM): VS AC
Apheori (GM): Hit.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D6+4 and prone.
(
6
)
+4
=
10
The Gravedigger: GRAAAAAAAVES
Turn ends.
Bear Soup Guy: I imagine that turn would have looked so action movie awesome
Frezak (GM): HAH
Apheori (GM): Other skeleton gets up and attacks Dave...
Frezak (GM): Also i am going to bed.
So does Gan want my sheet?
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 + 6
(
5
)
+6
=
11
Gaurav: Eep. What time is it there?
Ganelon: Uh.
Sure, why not.
Frezak (GM): half three.
Apheori (GM): Heh.
Bear Soup Guy: Adios diggerman
Apheori (GM): Sweet nightmares.
Gaurav: Wow. Take care! Sleep well!
Apheori (GM): RADEK.
Ganelon: I use an infusion on myself first.
Frezak (GM): DOn't worry.
You have a shield of solid Gravy.
Ganelon: Which is a surge +2, so 9.
Then...
Scouring Weapon on this skeleton to the left.
'Tis my acid bullet.
[Weapon Attack - Rifle]
rolling 1d20+3+5+1+0
(
20
)
+3+5+1+0
=
29
Gaurav: wooooooooooooooooo
Ganelon: Ohohoho
I don't even have to roll damage, then.
Apheori (GM): Oh?
How do crits work?
Ganelon: 20 on attack rolls is a crit.
All damage dice are maximized.
Apheori (GM): Huh.
Ganelon: And if your weapon is magical, usually you get an extra damage dice or so.
Apheori (GM): Whatsit?
Ganelon: But mine isn't, and this power would normally be 2d10+5.
Now it's just 25.
Gaurav: wow
Ganelon: It's my snipery thing.
The skeleton also gets a -2 to his AC until the end of my next turn.
Just put, uh...
This on him.
And I could move, but will not.
Turn over!
Apheori (GM): The zombie grabs Rhu.
Bear Soup Guy: Hot dang
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You are now being embraced by a tower of rotting flesh.
Gaurav: Isn't there a roll for grabs?
Apheori (GM): It doesn't mention any.
Gaurav: Okay. Then I am grabbed.
Rhu: Ugh.
Apheori (GM): You try to escape during your own turn, right?
Oh, wait.
Ganelon: You do escape on your turn, as a move action.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 + 4 vs reflex
(
1
)
+4
=
5
Nevermind it fails.
I think.
Yes.
Gaurav: Yup.
Apheori (GM): You don't get grabbed.
The entire thing just collapses on you.
Ganelon: And it's a skill roll.
Gaurav: hahaha
Ganelon: Acrobatics or athletics.
Gaurav: you know, a grab doesn't sound so bad now ...
Apheori (GM): Rhu: To amend: A huge mass of rotting flesh embraces you and collapses around you in a smothering, stenchy mass.
Ganelon: Fun times.
Gaurav: Yay!
Apheori (GM): ...also the zombie is dead. But you still need to get out of it so you don't drown.
Rhu closes his mouth as tightly as he can
Gaurav: So that's a save on my own turn?
How did he die?
Apheori (GM): He pulled a muscle.
Gaurav: hahaha
goof
good*
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Apheori (GM): Yeah, that'd be a save on your turn.
The sphinx makes a hissing noise at the nearby skeleton and it falls apart.
Gaurav: HA
this battle is turning
Apheori (GM): This also heals the sphinx slightly.
Bear Soup Guy: Even our enemies are no match against our combined lunacy
Apheori (GM): The sphinx then grins at Gravy and Radek.
rolling 1d20 + 5 vs will
(
14
)
+5
=
19
rolling 1d20 + 5 vs will
(
1
)
+5
=
6
Gaurav: Poor Gravy.
Ganelon: Well, I'm not impressed.
Apheori (GM): So that hits Gravy? -2 to attack rolls... again.
Ganelon: It has to hit gravy.
A will of 20 at level 1 is... very nearly impossible.
Apheori (GM): Oh, okay.
I don't know these things.
Ganelon: Or level 2
Apheori (GM): The mouseforged runs and hides under a desk.
Or tries to.
Ganelon: He's probably a lot bigger than he remembers.
Apheori (GM): It actually mostly just winds up upending the desk.
Rhu: Aw. Poor little thing.
Gaurav: Does it make any noise with its mouth? I'm trying to imagine what a whimpering mouseforged sounds like
Apheori (GM): It then runs and does the same thing to the next one.
It makes hurking noises sometimes. Not right now, though.
RHU.
Gaurav: Move action: three spaces
Sphinx gets opportunity attack if it wants it.
Or Dave, for that matter.
No?
Standard action: radiant vengeance against the last skeleton standing
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+5 wisdom vs reflex
(
9
)
+5
=
14
Apheori (GM): Nope.
Rhu: hmpf
Gaurav: Minor action: I place an oath of enmity against the last skeleton standing
Rhu: Stupid bloody skeleton.
Gaurav: End of turn.
Wait, do I get a +2 against the skeleton?
Apheori (GM): Oh, aye.
So you do hit it.
Ganelon: You do!
Gaurav: Yay!
rolling 1d8+4 radiant damage
(
5
)
+4
=
9
I gain 4 temporary hit points
Bear Soup Guy: ONE MINUTE SORRY
Apheori (GM): And it's dead.
Gaurav: So.
Are we out of initiative? Or are the cat and/or the mouse going to make trouble?
Apheori (GM): You still need to corner the mouseforged, but there may be a better way to do it? I don't know. Gan?
Ganelon: Well, we don't need it to be during initiative.
And Frezak would probably like to be around for that
Apheori (GM): Well, it will attack if cornered.
Gaurav: I think that depends on how fast it's going. Each turn in initiative is like 15 seconds or so. If it's jumping left and right, we should probably stay in initiative and see what happens. If it is waiting to see what we do next, we should get out of initiative and then just do skill checks or something.
Aw yeah Gravy will definitely want to talk to Mr. Mousie
Ganelon: I think it's 6 seconds per turn. Or maybe even round.
Gaurav: oh gosh. that's faster than I thought.
...
Ganelon: But yeah, unless it's jumping around like crazy right now?
Gaurav: it's only just sinking in that we brought a mouse back from the dead today
Ganelon: We'll probably talk about cornering it and then do that.
And it can be a new initiative thing if necessary.
Apheori (GM): Right now it's cowering under a desk.
Ganelon: Then we could probably end and come back to that later.
If we have a moment to rest, new initiative stuff would require new initiative rolls.
Gaurav: That makes sense to me. We'd probably all stand about quietly staring at Mr. Mousie and see what it does next.
Apheori (GM): Well, for now it's Greibel's turn. There's a bunch of stuff nearby so it's not going to stay where it is.
Gaurav: Wait, I still have a minor.
Ganelon: Turn into a mouse!
Gaurav: Although Greibel is probably better at Nature checks than I am (+7?)
Apheori (GM): A swarm of mice!
Ganelon: He should be better at it.
Gaurav: Cool. End of my turn, then.
Apheori (GM): He could totally talk to it, actually.
Yeah, let's end it. Greibel can do whatever.
Ganelon: This is exciting stuff.
Gaurav: Ha.
Ganelon: I put a mouse's soul into a robot body.
Gaurav: There's a good chance Rhu is going to start next turn by kicking all the bad guys we just killed.
That encounter was somehow both too close for comfort and a glorious victory for us.
Apheori (GM): Too close for comfort? Nobody even got bloodied.
Gaurav: The cat and the mouse.
Apheori (GM): When did either of them even attack any of you?
Gaurav: I know, but if they had, it would have been close I think.
Ganelon: If you knew the kind of encounters Frezak has run, you wouldn't be worried by this one.
Gaurav: both because they're both pretty strong and because they'd have distracted us, which means everybody else would have lived longer and dealt us more damage
Apheori (GM): Yeah, that was unfortunate.
The mouse really was supposed to attack.
Bear Soup Guy: Okay, I'm back
It looks like we won
Gaurav: To say nothing of the cat giving all of us -2 attack grins
Apheori (GM): The cat didn't discriminate!
Well, okay, the skeletons weren't alive, so it mostly ignored them, but...
Gaurav: heh
Ganelon: They don't really know fear.
It's probably a good thing, though. My ability to heal isn't that great.
At least compared to other leader classes.
Bear Soup Guy: Oh so is the mouse on our side now?
Gaurav: Apheori: are you planning Frezak-type close encounters in the future?
Apheori (GM): THIS was supposed to be one!
I just screwed it up with the mousiness.
Apheori (GM) grumps.
Gaurav: I can build up temporary hit points, but I almost died in our first test encounter, so I've always assumed Rhu is pretty weak.
Ganelon: Oh, that's nothing.
I was a turn away from bleeding to death in the first test encounter I ran with Korik, the raven guy.
And now whenever someone says "bandits", I take cover.
Apheori (GM): Bandits are scary.
Gaurav: heh
that seems sensible
Ganelon: If you intend to put us up against a Solo monster at some point, I have a bit of advice for you.
I'll save it for when you need it, though.
Apheori (GM): But how will you know ahead of time?
Gaurav: I'm imagined a sealed envelope
with a wax seal
"Open in case of solo monster"
Ganelon: I can tell you like five seconds after we go up against a solo.
I don't need to know how it fights or that it's coming up.
It's advice concerning how to play them.
Apheori (GM): Oh.
Tell me.
Now.
Gaurav: okay, they're showing the "Blues Brothers" on campus for free in 45 minutes and seeing as I've wasted seven hours with you lot I should go feed and work and I dunno try not to lose my job or something :-P
thanks for a very exciting session!
Apheori (GM): Bye.
Ganelon: See ya
Gaurav: see ya Tuesday!

Session 14

Apheori (GM):
Ganelon: Did it not do anything?
Apheori (GM): What do I do? Do I just paste that into it?
Ganelon: Into the macro text box, yes.
Apheori (GM): Oh.
Huh.
27
Ganelon: There you go.
Now make it show in the macro bar.
Apheori (GM): Already done.
How do you do it without the buttons?
Ganelon: Just typing all that in, basically.
Apheori (GM): Oh.
Ganelon: You can enter it into the chat.
Apheori (GM): Huh.
Ganelon: And again, you have to have the thing selected for the "&tracker" line.
Otherwise it just gives you a number and you have to add it yourself.
Apheori (GM): Yeah, it updated the sphinx when I had it selected.
Silly sphinx always getting good rolls.
Ganelon: Well, I am glad to be of assistance.
Apheori (GM): Thank you, seriously.
Ganelon: And now I will take my leave, from R20 at least.
Gaurav: here!
Is it just me, or is that a robot with the soul of a mouse under that table?
Frezak (GM): must be abig table
Apheori (GM): It's trying to be under it. It's not really succeeding.
Gaurav: It is! Unfortunately, the mouseforged is bigger.
Frezak (GM): I'll make soothing mousesounds.
Apheori (GM): It's cowering in fear.
Gaurav: "Mouseforged" is probably the single coolest word we've come up with this campaign, and we came up with "noodle-armed grump"
Frezak (GM): it's a pretty good word.
Whoever came up with it should get XP.
Apheori (GM): You get 2pe.
Gaurav: Is that like a toupee?
Bear Soup Guy: 2 Pie Experience
Frezak (GM): gravy does not need more physican education
he's a shovelesman
Radek: Ha-hah! Fantastic!
Apheori (GM): Fine.
Radek: Gentlemen, I give you the Mouseforged.
Ganelon: It's becoming an in-character thing.
Rhu looks nervously at Radek. This is probably the first time he's heard Radek laugh, ever.
Ganelon: So says I.
The Gravedigger: Rhu, any idea why the dead things reanimated?
Frezak (GM): how dare you steal my word you maggot
Rhu: Not off the top of my head. (pokes at the skeleton closest to him)
Mouseforged cowers and looks for an escape.
Gaurav: Should that be a heal check or a religion check?
Greibel: Is he....um?
Gaurav: Eh, might as well do both.
Frezak (GM): i'd give mousie some food, but warforged can't eat
Bear Soup Guy: Oh, I have porridge talk now
The sphinx jumps out of Dave's arms and onto the mouseforged.
The porridge wiggles gleefully
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+10 heal check to see if there's anything he can tell from the bones in terms of what where they might have come from, cause of death
(
18
)
+10
=
28
Dave: Ey!
Apheori (GM): Rhu: They're corroded.
And glowing slightly.
You think it was some sort of dark magic.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+8 religion check to see if there's anything religious which might explain animated dead things ... seeing as Rhu has a power specifically for undeads, I guess he has some sort of training in such matters.
(
1
)
+8
=
9
Bear Soup Guy hums Losing My Religion
Gaurav: ruh roh
Apheori (GM): They look undead.
Gaurav: You mean redead.
Apheori (GM): You've studied undead.
Gaurav: unundead.
Is there like a theory of undeadiness?
Apheori (GM): For all you know they might reundead.
Rhu pokes at the skeleton warily with his maul
Rhu: I don't know why they didn't die, but they might reanimate. Ugh. Undead.
Apheori (GM): The skeleton clatters.
Rhu: Do you think ... Mr. Mousie ... will get scared if I walk over to the dead elf over in that corner?
He seems nervous.
Apheori (GM): At some point you notice something in the skeleton bones.
Dave walks over to the mouseforged.
Dave: It's petrified.
Cute?
Gaurav: What do I notice?
Apheori (GM): A key on a chain.
Rhu: Huh.
Rhu bends down and picks up the key
Radek: I wonder.
Frezak (GM): have we come across any locked things?
Radek: Greibel, speak to the Mouseforged.
Gaurav: Lokshmi is a god of lock pickers
Greibel: Oh right, good idea...
Apheori (GM): Frezak: Not that couldn't be forced.
Greibel heads over hesistantly
Frezak (GM): i'm not sure that would work.
since it doesnt have mouse senses any more...
Ganelon: Looks it not like a machine? Mark it, Greibel.
Bear Soup Guy: That's why he wonders
Ganelon: It would be spoke to.
Bear Soup Guy: Nature check I suppose
Rhu: He might find squeeking ... reassuring?
Apheori (GM): Also it has a sphinx sitting on it.
Gaurav: That has to be pretty terrifying for a mouse.
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20+12 Mouse Talk
(
2
)
+12
=
14
Gaurav: Mouse Chat
Apheori (GM): What do you try to say?
Bear Soup Guy: squeak squeak squeak
Gaurav: Mouse Shooting The Breeze
Bear Soup Guy: I try to calm the mouse down
Ganelon: What art thou that usurp'st this body of wood, together with that fair and warlike form, in which the majesty of soldiers past built, did sometimes march?
By heaven, I charge thee, speak.
Apheori (GM): The mouseforged does nothing, just sits there, petrified.
Greibel shrugs
Ellemerr: Gan, you are a wonderful, wonderful man.
The porridge jumps down onto the mouse next to the cat
Rhu: Hey, we should heal up, since we're out of encounter. I think some of us might need some rest on some of our powers, too. I'm fine, I just need a breather.
Radek: Hrm. Disappointing.
Gaurav: Aw, poor mouseforge.
Gan: damn. You're doing all our speeches from here on out.
Amadi makes clanky noises from inside her trusty tank.
Ganelon: I'm quoting Shakespeare, silly.
Ellemerr: Not enough people do that.
Ganelon: It's one of my favourites, mostly because I get to use it when people return from long absences of communication.
Ellemerr: Wheee
I mostly just shout "Get thee to a nunnery" every once in a while.
Apheori (GM): It's like a cattery, but for nuns.
Frezak (GM): AN eatery
Get your nun here
hot nun
nun-on-a-stick
Ganelon: Nun on a bun?
Frezak (GM): Nunstrips.
Ellemerr: ... I'm sorry for making this happen.
Frezak (GM): Get you a nundrum.
Apheori (GM): Heh.
So the mouseforged flips out and attacks Dave.
The sphinx winds up with a face-full of porridge.
Bear Soup Guy: Oh dear
Gaurav: Uh oh
Frezak (GM): do we like dave?
Apheori (GM): I don't know. Do you?
Bear Soup Guy: Sure, Dave's cool
Ganelon: I'm going to refrain from answering on Radek's behalf.
I as a player am pretty cool with Dave.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 + 8
(
8
)
+8
=
16
Ellemerr: Does Radek like anyone whose not mechanical?
Gaurav: We definitely like her better than we like Devourer the Sphinx at the moment.
Ellemerr: Noooo, Nameless is nice...! :3
Gaurav: Has anybody's passive perception picked up Amadi in the vat yet?
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d6 + 4
(
4
)
+4
=
8
Frezak (GM): I thought she liked it in there.
Apheori (GM): Wow, that's not very impressive.
Frezak (GM): I'll go charge the mouseforged if I can?
Ellemerr: Dawn is just some silly copy of me who doesn't remember enough things to be impressive.
Frezak (GM): BAD MOUSEFORGED
Ellemerr: Or confusing.
Bear Soup Guy: I think we're just sort of accepting Amadi in the vat as normal for today
Apheori (GM): You can totally charge it.
Greibel takes 4 damage, Dave takes 8.
Rhu: I think we should back up and just .. give him some space.
Ganelon: Radek liked, uh... Rurik, was it?
Ellemerr: Oh right, yeah.
Apheori (GM): Sphinx mauls the mouseforged.
Frezak (GM): Charge!
Gaurav: Are we in initiative?
Ganelon: The guy he offered to make rifle and laser-weapon blueprints for.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+9+1
(
13
)
+9+1
=
23
VS AC.
Ellemerr: I remember, Gan.
Apheori (GM): We're not in initiative. It's just madness right now.
Frezak (GM): Does rurik talk without moving his mouth?
Apheori (GM): That totally hits.
Frezak (GM): So I would prone mousie.
The Gravedigger: Bad Mousie!
No!
Gaurav: Are the doors still on their hinges?
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d8 + 4
(
7
)
+4
=
11
So sphinx damages the mouseforged, you prone the mouseforged and send the sphinx flying.
Frezak (GM): I'll accept that outcome.
Can I wrestle the Mouseforged.
Apheori (GM): The sphinx still has porridge all over its face and is making funny noises.
Ganelon: Funny "displeased cat" noises?
Gaurav: The sphinx or the porridge?
Or _both_
Apheori (GM): You can... if you want to wrestle it?
Amadi starts whistling "I'm odd", the deleted song from Disney's Alice in Wonderland.
Frezak (GM): Well, is it still moving?
Apheori (GM): Actually, you're not sure which is making the noises. It might be both.
Rhu walks over to the north doors and closes them. Can he bolt them?
Apheori (GM): They sound somewhat distressed, kind of angry, and a little bit like bad pop music.
Yeah, it's moving.
Rhu: "The porridge and the sphinx" would make an awesome movie.
Dave goes to the sphinx and peels the porridge off its face.
(From Amadi): To Sphinx's head: "That's the spirit! Now, harmonize!"
The sphinx warbles.
The Gravedigger: Radek, what do we do with this?
Can you... lock up it's movement?
Stop it hitting people,
Apheori (GM): Rhu: No bolt, but there's a box you could put in front of them.
The Gravedigger: *?
Rhu puts the box in front of the door
Apheori (GM): Unfortunately the doors open out of the room so it wouldn't do much good.
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+10 heal check on the dead elf to check for anything of interest
(
7
)
+10
=
17
Rhu moves the box out from in front of the door
Radek: This is your own fault for making me use a mouse's soul rather than something more pliable.
Frezak (GM): Could I... manhandle mousie into a tank?
And then seal the tank?
Apheori (GM): The dead elf smells really bad. Bits of it are all over the room. It's like it exploded. Twice.
Ganelon: Can I do what he wants, though?
Lock up its joints?
Apheori (GM): Rhu: But despite the damage you think what killed it was something a lot less interesting.
Gaurav: What sort of something?
Apheori (GM): Gan: Yeah, probably.
Gaurav: Something innocuous.
Ganelon: I'll give it a shot, then.
rolling 1d20+11
(
5
)
+11
=
16
Apheori (GM): Gravy can also manhandle it.
Frezak (GM): I will if Radek fails.
Well, try
Apheori (GM): Radek: It smacks you - not hard enough to do much damage, but hard enough to hurt. Do you keep trying or back away?
Ganelon: Back away.
Ungrateful thing, biting the hand that feeds it.
Frezak (GM): you never fed it
Ganelon: It no longer needs to eat!
The sphinx: Feed it, then. Feeeed it to me. Let me have it.
Frezak (GM): I'll... gravyhandle it.
Dave strokes the sphinx.
Apheori (GM): Fine.
You gravyhandle it toward a tank.
The Gravedigger: it's for your own good!
I'm sorry, Mr.Mousie.
The sphinx: They takes it...
Gaurav: Oooh, tank, good idea!
The Gravedigger: BACK OFF, CAT
The sphinx stalks toward it, ignoring Gravy.
The Gravedigger: someone help me here?
Amadi comes out of her tank, purring at the sphinx.
Dave rubs against Amadi's legs, but seems too distracted to entirely stop.
Amadi: Such a hunger, you'd eat the world if we let you.
The sphinx rubs against Amadi's legs, but seems too distracted to entirely stop.
Apheori (GM): Sorry, wrong one.
Frezak (GM): DAVE
EW
Apheori (GM): >.>
Ellemerr: That would've been amusing.
Amadi picks up the sphinx.
The sphinx purrs loudly - like a warning.
Apheori (GM): The tank doesn't seem to want to shut.
The Gravedigger: Damn.
Amadi stuffs her head in the sphinx's fur and talks in a foreign language.
Gaurav: Aw
Frezak (GM): feast of fur!
Apheori (GM): Radek: You notice it's probably because of how it was opened - emergency release vs... properly.
Frezak (GM): can I force it shut?
Using my consistent 1's on Str?
Ganelon: Can it be reset?
The sphinx sticks a pawful of claws on Amadi's shoulder and mutters something.
Radek: Hold on. This was opened in a hurry.
(From Amadi): Once upon a time the world was made of stories. Nothing was real and everything was delicious and there were no limits but imagination.
(To Amadi): It's not just hunger. It's fear, release. There's something more, can feel it, can feel it. It's in there, and I must have it.
Ganelon: Is it permanently damaged?
Apheori (GM): Doesn't seem to be.
Need to put the pieces back, basically.
Ganelon: Another tech skills roll, then?
Gaurav: Does the mouseforged seem any less nervous now? Especially since Devourer seems distracted?
(From Amadi): Shush, dear, dear fearsome soul, dear dead one from the empty lands. These are important men. One of them's a Keeper. Let them try what they must and be patient, for a bit.
(To Ellemerr): You'd need to tell it a really good story in order to overcome its hunger for the mouse's story. That story is huge.
Apheori (GM): Slowly the sphinx relaxes, but it still stares at the mouse with hungry, hungry eyes.
Dave realises her arm is covered in blood and stares at it in utter confusion.
Ganelon: ...Is the Sphinx dying?
Apheori (GM): The mouseforged seems to have given up hope and is just cowering again.
Is it? Who knows!
Rhu: (to Sphinx) What is up with you? I thought you only ate stories?
(From Amadi): There was no patience in the world before the world. What the folk wanted, they would have, for they could imagine it and it would be there. There was no hunger, in the time before time, but for one: the hunger for something new. Something more. Ideas were made and realized and they filled the world, which grew and grew, and -
Apheori (GM): Gan: Yeah, tech, sorry.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+11
(
2
)
+11
=
13
YEEEAH
Amadi: (in normal voice, to Rhu) Silence, if you please.
Ganelon: Spent all my brilliance on the soul thing, apparently.
Apheori (GM): You almost get it, but can't figure out where one of the pieces goes and the door mechanism falls apart.
Amadi keeps muttering strange words to the sphinx.
The sphinx falls into the rhythm of the words, purring, but still watches the mouseforged out of one eye.
Apheori (GM): (I mean back to the state it was, not wrecked entirely.)
Ganelon: Oh.
Radek grumbles to himself. "Shoddy craftsmanship."
Apheori (GM): Your modifier is sufficiently high that you'd need a 1 to wreck that entirely. It's not exactly high-tech.
Ganelon: If I don't succeed, it's probably the fault of whoever built the thing!
Apheori (GM): Totally.
Bear Soup Guy: That's the spirit!
Ganelon: Things seem to have calmed down, but I'll make another attempt.
The sphinx: Arah.
(From Amadi): One day, there were no more ideas. The world was full of everything that could be imagined. Imagination had run dry. The folk had grew weary of the hunger, purring within them, but they were tired. They could think of nothing more to sate it with.
Gaurav: I imagine Radek accidently improves it while trying to fix it.
Ganelon: "Aha! Now it will NEVER open!"
The sphinx: This story...
The sphinx hisses and bits Amadi's ear.
Frezak (GM): Ear damage
Rhu: HEY!
Amadi looks scorned, and gently puts the sphinx down.
Amadi: Have it your way, then.
Apheori (GM): Amadi: You get the impression you've scared the sphinx. Really scared it. Like this story has meaning to it...
Ellemerr: Well of course it does~
Rhu: (to Amadi) You okay?
Apheori (GM): Heh.
Yeeees.
Ellemerr: And now you won't be hearing the end of it.
The sphinx backs away from Amadi, looking around uncertainly.
Ganelon: You heartless wench. Telling the sphinx a story and not us.
Amadi: I got a cat bite in my ear.
Radek: I can fix that.
Dave: Inside it?
The Gravedigger: How did you do that?
Tell me how to do that!
PLeeeease
Ganelon: TELL ME HOW TO SCARE THE CAT
Amadi: Do what? Put... cat bites in your ear?
Dave examines the ear.
The Gravedigger: Make the cat run away.
Dave: It appears to be bleeding.
Amadi: I think you pluck them off trees. I'm pretty sure you do. Then you... store them, for a while. In jars. With pickle-juice.
I have blood inside. It's a nice thing to have. It's supposed to stay inside, I think.
Dave: Oh.
Greibel:
rolling 1d20+10 Greibel perceptions around this corner of the room since he's still over here and there's a bunch of upturned desks and crazy stuff here
(
3
)
+10
=
13
Amadi: You have blood inside, too. Isn't that glorious?
Dave looks down at her arm. "So I should probably fix this."
Amadi: Probably.
Poor sphinx. He's been there for so long...
Apheori (GM): Greibel: The skeleton has some things you could loot. The desks are pretty messed up and their stuff is all over the floor.
Radek: Are you /all/ dying over there?
Apheori (GM): Also that box.
Rhu: (to Greibel) Do you know anything about the care and pacification of large fierce felines?
Apheori (GM): With the talk folks' stuff.
Gaurav: "Talk folks"?
Amadi: I'm only dying if sphinx infected me with something. I don't think it can do that.
Dave: Where?
Apheori (GM): Tank folks*
Ellemerr: I'm totally a tank folk.
Apheori (GM): Totally.
Gaurav: HUH
Greibel: (to Rhu) A housecat - piece of cake. A mountain lion - fun challenge. This thing... (throws his arms up)
Amadi: I wonder what it's like to have an infection...
Gaurav: That could be useful
Dave: Where was the sphinx? I should know this, but I don't.
Rhu stays where he is and doesn't take his eyes off the sphinx
Dave: At least I think I should?
Amadi: You really don't know a whole lot of things, you know.
Rhu suddenly realises what Dave is saying
Dave: Yes.
Rhu: (to Dave) Oh! I know this. He was in the City of the Dead.
I think that's what it was.
Amadi: Poor little dear in the deadlands...
Rhu: Everybody was dead, and there was a tower.
Amadi: Did it fly?
Rhu: He came back with me. I think Hazz'ridan might have sent us both back. Via a beach, as I recall.
No, but it kept changing. It was pretty weird.
Amadi: You're probably not important enough.
Amadi shrugs.
Dave: Are there livelands?
Rhu: This seems likely.
Livelands?
Frezak (GM): A TOWER?
Dave: I don't know. There should be live lands if there are dead lands. I should have a name, and a past. There are people here, but what is here? Why am I here?
Gaurav: Did Gravy say that?
Frezak (GM): No, Me.
A GIANT TENTACLY FACE?
Amadi: Be Dawn. You're not quite Dave, after all.
Rhu: (to Dave) Just be glad you're here. We were on Sarathi. It was awful. Holes everywhere.
Amadi: Or be... Tanzania.
Amadi shrugs.
Gaurav: No face. Lots of tentacles, though. They were cold and enveloping.
Frezak (GM): Heh.
Ellemerr: Any masks?
Frezak (GM): Someone mentioned a ... box?
Dave: Dawn. Who is Dave?
Apheori (GM): There's a box in the corner.
Bear Soup Guy: Right, I should be looking through the box I guess
Frezak (GM): THat thing top-left?
Amadi gives Dawn a pointed look. "You're not Dave."
Gaurav: Ellemerr: Not in through the Hole Rhu fell through, but a woman did give us a mask carved on a rock when we arrived in this town.
Frezak (GM): Anyone done anything to it?
Greibel looks through the box and the skeleton corpse
Dave: Are you, then?
Gaurav: BSG: Don't let the box eat you!
Bear Soup Guy: Oh, that thing up there is totally a chest
Amadi smiles the sort of smile someone smiles when other people do what the smiler wants them to. "No."
Frezak (GM): ohhhh
Bear Soup Guy: And it looks like a coffin
AIn't going near that
Apheori (GM): Skeleton has a dented ring and some coins lodged in its spine.
Frezak (GM): REVEAL YOUR SECRETS UNTO ME
No gems in it's gold-plated legbones?
Apheori (GM): Box got distorted because this thing uses the alt key to not align to grid and that's a window manager function.
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20+2 inspect the ring for magicks
(
12
)
+2
=
14
Apheori (GM): IT MIGHT HAVE MAGICS.
Or it might just be dirty.
Bear Soup Guy: CLOSE ENOUGH
Gaurav: Lodged to its spine, eeks.
Greibel takes out the ring and puts it on, admiring it and rubbing it a bit
Ganelon: Pah.
Frezak (GM): I'm just going to go and be brave and try to open it.
Ellemerr: Genie?!
Ganelon: Your magicks are soggy.
Bear Soup Guy: "I AM THE GENIE OF THE RING!"
"DON'T ASK HOW I GOT INSIDE A RING. IT'S COMPLICATED."
Frezak (GM): THINGS COME IN BOXES
I GOT THIS
Rhu takes up a position beside Gravy, just in case.
Frezak (GM): Wood.
Gaurav: Hey, if it is a coffin, it's right up Gravy's alley
Frezak (GM): Maybe step behind me?
i'm made to take damage.
Apheori (GM): Frezak: Box has a bunch of random things. Looks like some implements, rations, clothes, armour, a few books, some weapons, a black mask, and a really mouldy piece of cheese.
Frezak (GM): Yeah!
Gaurav: Ew.
Frezak (GM): MASK
Rhu: Ew.
Frezak (GM): And what KIND of armour/weapons?
Bear Soup Guy: yay armor
Ganelon: That's a lot of stuff.
Amadi pokes Dawn. "Would you tell our dear that it's too scared of the end and it shouldn't be? I don't think it'll listen to me for a while yet..."
Apheori (GM): Some rotten leather armour (no, you don't know how that happened), a set of chainmail, a few daggers, a longsword, some kind of rod/wand.
Rhu flips through the books
Apheori (GM): The books are in several languages. ROLL HISTORY.
Ganelon: History!
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+3 HISORY THE HECK OUT OF THAT SHIT
(
12
)
+3
=
15
Gaurav: er
(From Ellemerr): I can read those, eh?
Gaurav: that is inadequate historage
Apheori (GM): Dude, this one looks like deresi.
You can read them all, the question was if you'd recognise any.
Frezak (GM): I'll toss the rodwand at the Artificer.
Apheori (GM): Well, you could have more than recognised, but you didn't.
So neener.
Ellemerr: Hah
Ganelon: A rodwand, eh?
Ellemerr: Silly Hazz...
Gaurav: :(
Dave asks Amadi if she knows how to fix her arm.
Frezak (GM): rodwandthing
Apheori (GM): I don't know the difference between rods and wands, okay? >.>
Gaurav: What is deresi?
Frezak (GM): Rods are wider and shorter.
More like a whacking stick than a poking stick.
Apheori (GM): A language. The deresi people aren't very well-liked, beyond being like the common understanding of gypsies you don't really know anything about it.
I guess it's a rod.
Amadi: You... put the blood back, and... no, you probably just puts the skin back, and then the blood will... respawn. Or make more. One of those. You could ask sphinx to lick it, but I don't think it is sphinx saliva that has healing properties...
Ganelon: Is it magical?
(To Ellemerr): Sphinx saliva actually does have healing properties here. XD
Apheori (GM): Yes!
Ganelon: How magical!? What does it DO?
(From Amadi): Well... ooops? xD
Apheori (GM): I have no idea.
Ganelon: BAH.
(To Amadi): Pfft. You meant what you said.
Bear Soup Guy: Greibel could probably take it if Gan doesn't want it
Gaurav: It might just be a +1 rod or something?
Bear Soup Guy: Druids use wand rod things, right?
Ganelon: I don't think so.
Frezak (GM): I think they use both.
Gaurav: I need implements. Implements of Hazz.
Frezak (GM): Oh, druids. No.
Amadi: I always mean what I say, but do I say what I mean?
Bear Soup Guy: Right now he has a staff which seems similar
Oh okay
Amadi looks puzzled.
Dave: What?
Frezak (GM): Druids have Staves and Totems.
Ganelon: Rhu uses holy symbols and Greibel uses staves. Rods are... warlock things.
Bear Soup Guy: Ah totem, that was the other thing
Frezak (GM): Artificers use rods too.
Also INvokers.
Dave: I do not think the sphinx is in much of a mood to help.
Frezak (GM): Are the daggers/sword any good?
Amadi: Tell him he's too scared of the end. It probably won't help, but it should still be said.
Apheori (GM): One of the daggers is covered in green rust. The other is black.
The sword looks quite nice.
Frezak (GM): A black dagger?
Rhu: (to Dave) I don't mind that he doesn't want to help. I mind that the next time we're fighting someone, he's probably going to be on both sides at once.
Ellemerr: I want the rust! Dibs on the rust!
Frezak (GM): Black metal, or coating?
Apheori (GM): They don't seem to be magical, but you have no idea what to make of the dagger.
It's just... black. May not even be metal.
No light bounces off it.
The Gravedigger: Radek, any of this magical?
This dagger at least looks weird.
Radek: Let me see that.
Gaurav: What are the stats on the sword?
Dave: (to the sphinx) Ghezrau?
Rhu: I have a bad feeling about that dagger.
Dave: Are you... afraid of the end?
The Gravedigger: generally things that eat light are probably bad, yes.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+11 Arcana for identifying of the magicks.
(
12
)
+11
=
23
Apheori (GM): This the dager?
dagger
Ganelon: Yeah.
Apheori (GM): You have no idea.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+8 religion check on that dagger
(
9
)
+8
=
17
Apheori (GM): The sword is well-made, kind of fancy but still practical. It's probably a +1 too.
Frezak (GM): ooh
Ellemerr: I like "kind of fancy but still practical"
Apheori (GM): Rhu: It reminds you of the sea. And the tentacles.
Rhu: I imagine my maul does more damage than that, though.
Frezak (GM): I think Rhu is the only one that can even use one.
Ganelon: We can use anything magical.
Frezak (GM): longsword, shortsword, or greatsword?
Ganelon: Thanks to meeee
Apheori (GM): Longsword.
Frezak (GM): Oh, right.
Yeah, that's true.
Radek can just shift the +1 to something.
Examinings on the Chainmail?
The sphinx stares at Dave sullenly.
Ganelon: Actually I need to pick up that ritual.
Rhu: Er, could somebody please look up the damage dice on a longsword? I don't have PHB1 with me right now.
Gaurav: Sorry ooc
Ganelon: Otherwise I just have the much less efficient "disenchant and then slap +1 on a thing" method.
Frezak (GM): longswords are 1D8
Ganelon: It's a +3 1d8.
+3 is attack.
Gaurav: Thanks! My maul is +3 vs AC (although my powers let me use my WIS, which is +5) with 2d6 damage, so I think I'll stick with my maul?
Rhu: There's ... something familiar about that dagger.
Apheori (GM): The chainmail isn't very interesting.
Rhu: Could I please hold it?
The Gravedigger: What, it's a dagger from the world of the dead?
Sure, but I'll go stand over here....
Radek: Well, I can't make sense of the thing.
Apheori (GM): It's a good material, but that's all.
Rhu: No, from the other place. The beach.
And the tentacles.
It's something with do with Hazz'ridan.
Amadi: Tentacles!
Rhu picks up the dagger
Rhu: May I keep it?
Frezak (GM): IT EXPLODES
INTO BATGOATS
Dave: I think that might be mine.
Gaurav: uggg no not the batgoats
Dave: I hear it singing.
Radek: I could run tests, but... not tonight.
Amadi turns to see the sphinx leave.
Frezak (GM): That doesn't sound good.
Radek: I'll be busy enough tonight as-is.
Dave: Gleaming like dark suns.
The sphinx wanders off and disappears.
Amadi: Like the poo of the rhino who ate the moon!
Amadi giggles.
Dave frowns, then nods.
Rhu looks at the dagger, then up at Dave
Rhu: (to Dave) You should have it then.
Dave: I...
Dave hesitates.
Dave: I don't want to touch it.
The Gravedigger: Buy a glove!
Amadi giggles more, then breaks into laughter.
Gaurav: But not a glove made of light. It'd just eat it.
Rhu: Are you sure? I could hold on to it until you need it again.
Dave visibly relaxes.
Dave: Please do.
Amadi stops abruptly.
Frezak (GM): Glove made of fish.
Apheori (GM): Gross.
Frezak (GM): It's what rich people have.
Ellemerr: Chocolate buttons.
Gaurav: Just stuff your hand down a fish's gullet and call it a day.
Frezak (GM): SO, ABOUT THIS MASK.
Ellemerr: MASK
BLACK MASK
Is it lace?
Frezak (GM): Liquorice.
Flies.
Gaurav: Yum.
Ganelon: Porcelain.
Ellemerr: Black. Lace. Mask. Very fancy.
Got this sort of symbol on it.
Apheori (GM): The mask is for the top half of the face, it's black, lacy and sparkly, and while it has eye holes, they're covered with more black.
Gaurav: This sounds familiar.
Ellemerr: It has swirls going off on the sides and the top. The top-swirls look sort of fiery.
Frezak (GM): DOES IT FIT GRAY?
*gravy
(From Ellemerr): Does it belong to someone?
Gaurav: If it doesn't, you can tie it between your horns.
(To Ellemerr): You and/or Davedawnfragment.
Rhu wanders over to check in on Mr. Mousie.
Apheori (GM): It doesn't look like it'd fit Gravy, judging by the relative sizes.
Frezak (GM): bah
Amadi: That mask isn't mine.
Amadi looks very intently on it.
Amadi: at*
Give it here.
Gaurav: don't she'll eat it
Dave picks up the chainmail and slips it on.
Dave: A chainmail shirt. For the office warrior.
Amadi: Dave. Is this Dave's stuff? All of it?
Gaurav: Now I'm imagining a chainmail with a built-in, chainmail tie.
Dave: You said it wasn't yours.
Amadi points at Dave, sort of accusingly. "You're not Dave."
Dave: Are you?
Amadi frowns.
Amadi: ... No.
Gaurav: Who's playing Dave? Is it Ellemerr or Apheori? Or both? Is it a Mystery?
Ellemerr: Mystery plays Dave
Apheori (GM): I'm playing Dave.
Ellemerr: Or so she would have us believe.
Dave rubs her temple. "Ow..."
Dave: So many words, so many phrases. What do they all go to?
Gaurav: What's Mr. Mousie up to in his tank?
Dave: It's not... supposed to hurt to think, is it?
Apheori (GM): Gaurav: Hiding from you.
Amadi: You're so full of holes!
Amadi throws her arms in the air in frustration, then grabs the mask and thrusts it at Dawn.
Ganelon: Alright, can I heal check on Not-Dave here to make sure she's not dying?
Amadi: WEAR IT!
Dave takes it sceptically, then after a moment, puts it on.
Gaurav: Aw, poor mousie.
Apheori (GM): Suddenly all of Dave is covered in a sheen of black, apparently emanating from the mask.
Gan: You totally can, though I promise nothing while she's wearing that.
Rhu: (to Greibel) Can you get through to the mouseforged?
Amadi narrows her eyes at Dawn.
Greibel: I can give it a try
Amadi: Tell me your name.
Greibel: Easier while he's stuck in one spot I imagine. Although if I were trapped in that tank I don't think I'd be too willing to speak with my captors.
Rhu: (to Dave) WOAH
SHINY
The Gravedigger: Magic!
Radek: Hrmph.
Amadi: Tell me your NAME.
Bear Soup Guy: Did I miss the part where Dave put on a Mask of +1 Attraction? O_o
Dave: Names.
Ellemerr: Possibly.
Bear Soup Guy: Well Greibel wants to talk to the mouse now
Dave: Names! I don't know!
There are too many, so many names!
Amadi: TELL ME YOUR NAME!
Greibel:
rolling 1d20+12 Nature talk with mouse
(
8
)
+12
=
20
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+8 religion check to ask for Hazz'ridan's blessing in helping shiny!Dave come to term with herself
(
7
)
+8
=
15
Dave rips off the mask and throws it at Amadi.
Dave: I DON'T KNOW!
If it's mine of if it's hers or if it belongs to the dreamer or the other dreamer or the dreams because they all dream and there are always names. So many names. Broken names, known names, names that are traded, names that change, and they're all there and not there and... gods, what...
Dave falls to her knees, clutching her head.
Amadi looks bitterly at Dawn, bends to pick up the mask, and blinks in and out of existence as she picks it up.
The Gravedigger: Oh, great. Another insane magic lady.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You get through to it this time. Talk.
Ganelon: Is Dave back to "normal" with the mask this time?
Er, with it off?
Apheori (GM): Right, when she took off the mask the black went away.
And Amadi took the mask with her when she disappeared.
Or did she disappear?
Greibel: (to the mouse) Hello? I'm sorry that you're locked up like this but my friends were afraid you might hurt us. Are you alright?
Apheori (GM): Did she just blink?
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+8 Heal
(
19
)
+8
=
27
Ellemerr: I thought I just blinked. I considered disappearing.
Hazz'ridan sends Rhu a vague and not very helpful warning.
Ganelon: Nice token.
Apheori (GM): Okay, then them ask blinked with you.
Sorry. >.<
Ellemerr: Cool.
Gaurav: did she just blink once, or is she ... flickering?
Rhu looks around nervously
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+12 perception check to hear any sounds from outside the room
(
2
)
+12
=
14
Apheori (GM): Greibel: The mouseforged calms down a bit and makes some strange noises. You think it's asking you why it can't... feel.
Frezak (GM): Jesus.
WHAT HAVE YOU DONE, RADEK?
WHAT HAVE YOU MADE
Ganelon: Science. Duh.
Frezak (GM): Oh, right.
Amadi sighs, her anger draining. She stuffs the mask into several layers of clothing that might conceal a pocket. "Gods indeed... I'll envy you your holes, little sisterling."
Frezak (GM): Ew.
Amadi: I'll hold on to this. It's not mine, after all.
Frezak (GM): Ladyholes.
Ganelon: I still need results from that heal check.
Apheori (GM): Gan: You check out Dave. Her arm seems to have already mostly healed, despite the amount of blood. Her head, though, gives you concern - she seems to be in serious distress, like a stroke or something.
Ganelon: Ah.
Greibel: (to the mouse) Ah...I don't know much about this. My friend over there with the constant stare of disapproval put your soul into some sort of machine man? You were dead, and he brought you back with this evidently more functional body. I can see you're having some time to adjust to it however.
Gaurav: Huh.
Rhu walks over to both doors, first the north, then the south, and peers out to see if he can see anybody or hear anything
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+12 perception checks through the doors if that helps
(
1
)
+12
=
13
Gaurav: This is good
Frezak (GM): YOU CREATE A TRAP
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You don't think the mouseforged really understands any of that, but it seems happy with the attention.
Gaurav: I'm getting all the low rolls out of the die
Frezak (GM): There wasn't one.
But there is now.
Greibel: Hmmm
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You see a sphinx fly out of the corridor to attack you.
Frezak (GM): RHUUUUUU
Greibel stops trying to convey a whole lot of meaning and just continues to say words in an encouraging tone
Ellemerr: Sorry! I TRIED to calm it!
Apheori (GM): On second glance you realise it was just a shadow playing tricks on you.
There's nothing there.
Rhu: AAAAAAAAAAAA
Rhu falls over backwards
Rhu: which door was that?
Apheori (GM): South.
Ganelon: Alright, so.
Rhu gets up
The Gravedigger: RHU
Ganelon: I'm going to separate Dave and Amadi here.
The Gravedigger: What happened?
Ganelon: And just drag the former somewhere else.
Rhu: I -- there was a shadow. It played tricks on me! Always count the shadows. Or something.
Ganelon: Or attempt to. I mean, I can't really force any such thing when my strength is 8.
Apheori (GM): She is incredibly light. You have no trouble at all moving her.
Rhu: I don't like this room. We should move on.
The Gravedigger: Yeah.
I think we're done here.
Radek: You need to stop talking to Amadi.
Greibel: (to Rhu) What don't you like about it, the corpses or the ruins of questionably legal scientific meddling?
Amadi: I'm NOT Amadi. SHE isn't Dave!
Amadi grumbles and stomps off.
The Gravedigger: Hey, sandwich lady.
What's going on?
Radek: Particularly because you seem to care about what she says and it's causing you stress.
Dave whispers something unintelligible and then just lies there.
Gaurav: Hey, what's wrong with Dave?
sorry, ic
Rhu: Hey, what's wrong with Dave?
Amadi: You don't want to know. Nobody wants to know.
You're all hiding in your holes.
The Gravedigger: Hey!
I dig holes!
I can't hide in them!
Have to be outside to dig holes!
Amadi looks sullenly at the shadows in the corridor.
The Gravedigger: DOn't they teach you kids anything these days?
Oh dear.
Now I sound like Radek.
Apheori (GM): The shadows look back and blink.
Gaurav: This party is polarizing around an Amadi-Radek continuum
Ack
Never trust shadows that play tricks with you. It only gives them ideas.
Amadi waves at the shadows.
Rhu examines Dave
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+10 heal check on Dave
(
18
)
+10
=
28
Radek: Anyway, you should stop thinking for a while if you want to recover.
Dave smiles at Radek.
Radek: I recommend unconsciousness.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: She segfaulted.
Radek: Sleep if you feel like being wasteful.
Ganelon: Explain, please.
Apheori (GM): But seriously, it looks like a stroke to you as well.
Ellemerr: What's that mean`
Apheori (GM): Bad joke. >.>
Ellemerr: Still, what's it mean?
Gaurav: Rhu is not technically adept enough to get that bad joke.
Apheori (GM): When a program accesses memory out of bounds, it crashes. I think that's a segfault, unless I'm mixing that up with something else.
Gaurav: Ellemerr: she tried to look up a memory location that doesn't exist.
Ganelon: That's a null reference exception.
(To Ellemerr): Which is exactly what happened.
Ganelon: But it might also be a segfault.
(From Ellemerr): BWAHAHAHAHAHA
Ellemerr: AWESOME
Ganelon: There, my obligation as Team Medic is done.
Apheori (GM): So Dave takes Radek's advice and falls unconscious.
Gaurav: What is a stroke like in our current time period? Should we be hustling to get her to a hospital, or are our medkits sophisticated enough to deal iwth the occasional brain/bleeding problem?
Apheori (GM): Except Rhu notices she might actually just be dead.
Rhu: Um.
Apheori (GM): Radek too if he's still paying attention.
Gaurav:
rolling 1d20+10 heal check on Dave to see if she really is dead
(
1
)
+10
=
11
OOOOOOF
Ganelon: You and your 1s.
Apheori (GM): RHU KILLED DAVE.
Gaurav: Rhu constructs a trap on Dave's face
Amadi sits down and extends a hand to the shadows.
Gaurav: "I'm sorry, did you need this trachea?"
Ganelon: I probably am not still playing attention.
I'm gonna go check up on Project Mouseforged.
Apheori (GM): The shadows approach slowly, drifting about like black snow.
Radek: How are communications coming along?
Apheori (GM): Okay, so Rhu probably thinks he killed Dave.
Gaurav: Well that's depressing
Rhu: ...
guys
I think Dave's dead
Radek: ...What?
Rhu: I don't know, she seemed fine, and then ... I don't know
Frezak (GM): I poke Dave.
Amadi is muttering to the shadows.
Dave is poked.
Rhu keeps checking on Dave, trying to see if she's breathing and whatnot, all of this under the effect of the 1 I suppose
Rhu: I ... I think I messed something up
Apheori (GM): The shadows whisper back, comforting, distrusting, full of grime.
Radek: Out of my way.
Rhu: She was having some kind of stroke, and I tried to see what it was ...
(From Amadi): (shadowlanguage?) There you are, half by half, there you're not. You're all bits and pieces, are you not? Do the pieces fit together? If one is lost, what happens then? If one piece of the puzzle doesn't fit with its sibling...
Apheori (GM): She's not breathing or anything.
Rhu steps out of Radek's way, still mumbling nervously to himself
(From Amadi): And if one piece is lost, what will happen to the whole...?
(To Amadi): This isn't it. This wasn't. The pieces hungered, the bits were lost. The puzzle
Ganelon: I'll use an infusion on her.
(To Amadi): 's gone, the world. The mouse knows. Do you know? Where. No. You can't know. Nobody can know. Nothing nobody. This is it. You are here. Well is welllll.
Rhu mumbles a prayer to Hazz'ridan
Ellemerr: If it's any consolation, if she keeps being dead it was my fault.
Frezak (GM): Epinephrine spike!
Apheori (GM): Do it.
Ganelon: They wake up dying unconscious people just like all other heal abilities.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+8 religion check
(
9
)
+8
=
17
Ganelon: And if she's at negative HP, it becomes her surge value +2.
Frezak (GM): Except she'd wake up with Radek over her face.
And maybe choose to go back to being dead.
Amadi mutters, "All is well, and those who know cannot be."
Gaurav: Frezak: The city of the dead is full of sphnixes. Sphinxes EVERYWHERE
(To Rhu): You didn't kill her. You couldn't.
(To Rhu): She and Amadi are mirrors, keys. Guard them. They will see you through.
Ganelon: That's a risk we must take.
Gaurav: If I died and went there, I'd probably kiss Radek when I got back.
Ganelon: Also, more likely she'd just have a face full of beard.
The sphinx walks out of the shadows and approaches Amadi.
Ganelon: It's longer than I am tall.
Apheori (GM): XD
Frezak (GM): I HAVE PASSED DEATH
INTO THE CLOUDS
Apheori (GM): Quite the beard.
Frezak (GM): EW.
Amadi: There you are. I was just going to try to find you.
Frezak (GM): THESE CLOUDS SMELL.
Rhu looks over Radek's shoulder
The sphinx jumps onto Amadi's lab and hisses something about stories.
Rhu: Any luck?
Amadi: If you ate the mouse's story, could you give any of it back? Stuff pieces in a hairball?
Apheori (GM): What does a surge do?
The sphinx: The pieces are there. The words... I can give a story same as take. A smaller one. For words.
Amadi: I think we need a... a bezoar. From the belly.
For the poison.
Ganelon: It restores HP. Your surge value is 1/4 your max HP, rounded down.
The sphinx: Poison.
Ganelon: But that's mechanics. Basically, this heals her and should wake her up if there's anything wrong.
The sphinx: Okay, she wakes up.
Apheori (GM): Oops.
Anyway, she wakes up.
Gaurav: Are we going to have to bezoar this?
Apheori (GM): But she's still not breathing.
Rhu: Oh THANK GOD
Gaurav: huh?
Frezak (GM): Shit.
UNDEAD.
RHUUUUU
Amadi: brb
Dave: What?
Ganelon: While Rhu is distracted I rob him of two healing surges.
(If his player will allow this)
Frezak (GM): You sure?
I have... 13.
I am made of solid surges.
Ganelon: Well it's not like we can't heal him with yours if he runs out.
Artificer healing is weird!
Gaurav: Oh, he's HORRIBLY distracted. His passive perception is 22, though, so you might have to be sneaky
Apheori (GM): So Dave's just lying there staring weakly up at Radek.
Probably because of the beard.
Rhu: (to Dave) Hey! You okay?
Apheori (GM): I don't think she fully grasped its... extent before.
Gaurav: Does she actually grasp its extent?
Apheori (GM): I doubt it.
Ganelon: Good.
Radek: She's still dead.
Rhu: No, she isn't. Look at her!
She's still a bit out of it, yes ...
Ellemerr: Right. I should be back. Sorry about that, my keyboard died. I'm sure nobody missed me.
Dave tries to sit up and grabs Radek's beard by accident.
Apheori (GM): The sphinx didn't notice.
Rhu: Hazz'ridan said she was a key or a mirror, I'm not sure which. But she's important. As is ... Amadi? I think he meant that one (indicates Amadi)
We're supposed to guard them. Which I suppose involves not killing them. (mumbles) Sorry about that.
Radek: Hey!
Rhu unconsciously makes a hand-washing gesture with his hands
Radek: Hands off the hair. I'm not a ladder.
The Gravedigger: That's true.
He's not a ladder.
I have seen ladders.
And they don't look like grumpy old men.
Dave: Sorry, love.
Radek: I'm not /that/ either.
Dave falls back and stares at the ceiling like it's utterly fascinating.
Greibel: Cheer up, grumpy old love
The Gravedigger: Yes you are.
Ganelon: She's still not breathing?
Greibel smirks
(From Amadi): (in sphinx-head) They don't want you to eat the mouse's story. They won't like it if you do.
The Gravedigger: You lovable grumpy old man, you.
Apheori (GM): Only enough to form words.
Other than that, no.
Ganelon: Does she have... a pulse?
Apheori (GM): Nope.
Ellemerr: Did anyone check if she did before?
Apheori (GM): Nope.
The Gravedigger: SO, we going now?
Gaurav: Does Rhu notice that she's now undead? On the one hand, she's sitting up and talking, and seems sensible enough. But Rhu has some experience with the undead.
Apheori (GM): Well, actually, neither Rhu nor Radek noticed it not being there.
Before.
But she was having some kind of stroke.
What kinds of undead would he have experience with?
Ganelon: When you say experience...
Apheori (GM): XD
Gaurav: Gan: shut your face
Ganelon: Do you mean "read it on the internet" experience?
Frezak (GM): I thought there weren't undead where we came from?
Ellemerr: Tell me when you want the end. I'll see what I can get from the...
Ellemerr pats the sphinx and goes back into the room.
Ganelon: Oh, come on. I'm not needling for THAT kind.
Frezak (GM): LIke, since a super long time?
Gaurav: I dunno. I kind of imagine that there are minor undead outbreaks, which is why Avengers even have powers targetting undead?
Apheori (GM): Right.
They do sometimes come up, but only... very specific kinds. Not zombies.
Amadi pokes the glass of the tank of the Mouseforged.
Frezak (GM): Rhu back home:
"ONE DAY they will COME! And I'll be READY! I'll show them! They said I was MAD!"
Gaurav: Maybe he's only fought skeletons so far?
Ellemerr: And that previous thing was also IC.
Apheori (GM): There was a kind of engineered vampire that became popular for awhile, for instance.
Greibel: (To Amadi) Care to give it a try? I only seem to be conveying vague emotions at the moment.
Ganelon: Was it a pea?
Apheori (GM): Skeletons might happen sometimes with too many teenagers around.
The sphinx follows Amadi.
Gaurav: Is undeadness like a disease which breaks out, or is there always someone who has to animate the undead?
Dave: Gravedigger, would you help me up please?
Gaurav: breaks out by itself
Amadi: (to Mouseforged) Do you even know what you know? You should tell the Keeper. You're much better off telling the Keeper.
Frezak (GM): I LIFT HER
With manly arms.
Well.
Elfy arms, technically.
Mouseforged asks Greibel if it wants the it.
Gaurav: I've never met an elf who didn't want the it.
Apheori (GM): Gravy: You wind up picking her up well off the ground and realise half her weight seems to be chainmail.
Greibel: I, um...yes. Yes, I certainly do want the it. That is if you're willing to part with....it.
The Gravedigger: You're super light.
Some kind of diet?
Apheori (GM): Her wings dangle somewhat uselessly.
Dave: I don't think so?
Frezak (GM): Does she LOOK undernourished?
Mouseforged tells Greibel about large spaces, with noises and hunters and food.
Ganelon: I'm pretty sure that's not it.
Mouseforged then tells Greibel about the silence, the noise, and the smell. The dangerous feelings. The air that hunted. The death.
Ganelon: Radek's undernourished and you would still need to put in some kind of effort to pick him up.
Amadi looks at the Mouseforged with hungry eyes.
Mouseforged then talks about the silence. The dead food. The dead hunters. The no space in the large spaces.
Frezak (GM): Hey, Gravy isn't a doctor.
Apheori (GM): She doesn't look malnourished.
Greibel: Right. Of course. It's okay, the death is over now. You've been given new life. You can be something more.
Frezak (GM): Technically, he's an underdtaker.
*undertaker
Mouseforged: Hunter?
Ganelon: Griebel seems pretty okay with the whole "animal soul in a machine" thing.
Amadi says in something almost less than a whisper, "Don't be giving it ideas..."
Frezak (GM): Well, the animal soul was preserved...
The sphinx: Prey.
Bear Soup Guy: Greibel's frustrated with Radek for messing with the balance of nature and science that way, but he understands his motivations
Ganelon: He does?
Amadi strokes the sphinx and purrs. Genuinely.
Apheori (GM): Isn't Greibel's wisdom through the roof?
Ganelon: Or does he just think it was to be nice and save a formerly-living mouse's life?
The sphinx purrs in tandem.
Frezak (GM): Radeks motivations are science.
Ganelon: Exactly!
Frezak (GM): Gravy pushed it on Radek because HE wanted Mr.Mousie back.
Ganelon: I did it for PROGRESS!
Also to show off. Maybe. A bit.
Bear Soup Guy: He does allow some leeway because it did save the mouse's soul, and also he's intrigued by the whole affair
Gaurav: Should humans even be able to purr?
Dave: (to Gravy) You know, you're very tall.
Ellemerr: They really shouldn't.
Bear Soup Guy: He's still making up his mind about whether it's ethical or not, and he figures Radek is the guy to find out since he has the know-how
The Gravedigger: Healthy living.
Apheori (GM): Also, as a general note, the chainmail didn't have wing holes. She just put it on over her wings.
Ganelon: So when it said "hunter", was it in a language we could all understand?
Apheori (GM): Radek may or may not notice how strange it looks.
Ganelon: Fixing that would take time.
Apheori (GM): The sphinx used the same language as Greibel.
Ellemerr: He means the mouse.
Forged.
Apheori (GM): Oh, right.
Ganelon: Actually it might even take skills he doesn't have to make holes in the chainmail.
Apheori (GM): The sphinx said the opposite.
Nobody understood the mouse except Greibel and maybe Amadi.
Ganelon: Alright.
Ellemerr: Maybe the sphinx, too.
Apheori (GM): Maybe.
Gaurav: There isn't any way the Mouseforged might remember what the Warforged was up to back before it was Moused, is there?
Apheori (GM): Unlikely.
Ganelon: I don't think so.
It's just a shell.
Apheori (GM): The sphinx could eat it and find out, though.
But only Amadi knows that and she don't want it.
Ellemerr: Well, that's not quite it, either.
Apheori (GM): Nope.
Ellemerr: But she has been keeping it from it.
Apheori (GM): I oversimplify.
Ellemerr: I know.
Apheori (GM): Is Gravedigger still holding Dave?
Frezak (GM): No, I let her go.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Dave: Am I dead?
Amadi yawns, without breaking off the purring, and says to Greibel in a tired voice, "Knowledge is hard. It's difficult. Holes are simple. Sometimes when you get knowledge, you don't use it to plug your holes, because it's scary. But you... you should... at least consider. Probably. I think."
Gaurav: I honestly have no idea why Rhu is up to, so let's just say he's praying to Hazz'ridan in thankgiving for bringing Dave back from the dead.
Radek: From a medical perspective, yes.
Dave: But that should only work for a few minutes at most.
Greibel: (To Amadi) I feel like you know more than you appear to. I'd like to learn from you but that's proving rather difficult.
Apheori (GM): XD
Ganelon: He's not talking about the medicine, he's saying that a doctor would declare her dead
Amadi: Well... maybe in time... maybe when it doesn't leak out... maybe when I'm... someone else.
Greibel: Fair enough
Greibel goes back to speaking with the mouse
Amadi saunters tiredly over to Dave, her purring dying away. "I'm glad you're not a missing piece, even if you are so full of holes." Then she gives Dawn a little hug and falls asleep on her chest and disappears.
Apheori (GM): She may be talking about something else, then.
Dave pauses for a bit, and then just says, 'Okay'.
Ellemerr: Or on her shoulder. Whatever's convinient.
Apheori (GM): SHE'S LEARNING.
Ellemerr: I'm a dreadful teacher. And I claim no further responsibilities for the sphinx.
The sphinx tries to squeeze past Greibel and stares at the mouseforged.
Ellemerr: Also, goodnight and sweet nightmares and good games.
Radek: That's the spirit. Just stop listening to lunatics and I guarantee you'll feel better for it.
Bear Soup Guy: Bye Ellemerr!
Apheori (GM): Sweet nightmares.
Gaurav: Good night, Ellemerr!
Radek: As for your current situation...
Dave: Yes?
Radek glances behind him, at the Mouseforged.
Dave looks as well.
The porridge suddenly hops onto Greibel's shoulder.
Radek: I could put you in that if your body's about to shut down.
Greibel looks back at Radek incredulously
Dave looks at it for a bit, then frowns at Radek.
Greibel: Oh, I see. So you'd put this creature through the torment and fear of this experience of being in this unknown and unfamiliar body, after having lived through death itself, and then you would just as quickly snatch away its sudden opportunity at a second life.
Dave: I think it already has. I'm not alive. I'm not dead, either.
Greibel: You graduated from Mad Scientist University, I presume
Radek: What? Don't be ridiculous.
I'd build a mouse body first!
Dave: This is my body. I'm not parting with it.
Radek: It would be a perfect opportunity to study the workings of a Warforged shell!
Dave: Even if I am some sort of zombie or something.
Greibel contemplates the mouseforged
(From Ellemerr): That's my Dawn! Especially since we might need that body. Damn, leaving is hard. I'm doing it now I swear!
Dave: Am I a zombie?
Radek shrugs. "Suit yourself."
Greibel: I think it would prefer a mouse body, yes.
Dave tries to remember what she did to the skeletons, and then tries it on herself.
Gaurav: What did she do to the skeletons?
Apheori (GM): She sent out a burst of radiant energy that hurt them.
Gaurav: So she's attacking herself?
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d10 + 10
(
10
)
+10
=
20
Ganelon: Radek wouldn't just /kick out/ the mouse soul.
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Ganelon: That's not nearly deranged enough!
Apheori (GM): And I think she may have killed herself.
Frezak (GM): Again?
Apheori (GM): XD
Ganelon: He'd either try to put two souls in one body or build a second one.
Bear Soup Guy: I underestimated Radek's ingenuity =D
Greibel just sees Unethical Science Person
Frezak (GM): BUT RADEK IS UNETHICAL SCIENCE PERSON
Ganelon: He may or may not have graduated from Mad Scientist University, though.
Apheori (GM): RHU: What's your anti-unded power?
Ganelon: I do not deny this allegation.
Frezak (GM): It was one of those correspondence courses for mad scientists;
Bear Soup Guy: ^
Frezak (GM): because haveing a physical shcool would be bad.
Bear Soup Guy: He got a certificate
Gaurav: It's "abjure undead"
Apheori (GM): Ah.
Okay.
Gaurav: "You send a brilliant ray of radiant power at an undead foe, compelling it to stagger toward you."
Ganelon: Or just explode, apparently.
Frezak (GM): It's a radiant laser lasso.
Apheori (GM): So not quite what Dave did.
Gaurav: I think maybe all the Divine classes have special and unique anti-undead powers
Apheori (GM): So Dave almost killed herself again with a blast of radiant damage.
She falls over and says 'ow'.
The Gravedigger: Don't do that!
Rhu: Did you just attack yourself?
The Gravedigger: I don't hit myself with a shovel, you don't hit yourself with mystic lasers!
Dave gets up and says, "I had to try."
Dave: You've never hit yourself with a shovel?
The Gravedigger: No!
Why would I?
Dave: To learn.
But if you have already learned through less... painful methods, there would be no need.
I don't know what those are.
I think I'm a zombie.
The Gravedigger: I know what would happen!
It'd hurt!
IT'S A SHOVEL.
There's no mystery to shovels!
Dave: This wasn't a shovel.
The Gravedigger: It's a big bit of metal on a stick!
Well, yeah.
Greibel: Well, with the right drugs...
The Gravedigger: THere is that.
Dave: This... it's specifically for the undead. It doesn't harm the living.
The Gravedigger: Oh, yeah.
Let's all get crazy on drugs in a secret underground laboratory.
Rhu: Ah.
So you ARE undead?
Greibel: I thought you'd never ask!
Dave: So it would seem.
Apheori (GM): I love Greibel.
Greibel takes a toke for the dungeon master
The sphinx sits on the mouseforged's lap while Greible is distracted and stares intently at its 'face'.
Radek: Well, not to worry.
Rhu: Have you ... I hope this isn't a personal question, but ... have you ever been undead before?
Dave: Before what?
Frezak (GM): Robolap.
Rhu: Before now. Before you got here.
...
Back when you were in these tanks, I guess.
Which tank were you in?
Dave: I don't know. I don't remember.
Rhu nods
Rhu: There seems to be a lot of that going around
We need a plan. We could keep going, or we could camp here for the night.
Frezak (GM): How DID greibel get here?
Greibel: I'd love to camp next to all of these potentially-reanimatable corpses!
Radek: I need time to prepare these blueprints.
Greibel: I had a moment of great and powerful insight
Radek: Anywhere will suffice.
Greibel: And then I tripped on the doorway
Frezak (GM): Didn't he NOT teleport?
Rhu: Greibel: there's, like, one empty room in that corridor we came through. All the rest of them are filled with bones.
Frezak (GM): I didn't follow what he and sphinx were doing to get here.
Rhu: Dead bones, but better the potentially-reanimatable corpse you know ...
Frezak (GM): And we can just go down the hall to get back to the town.
Bear Soup Guy: We had Amadi with us first
We came in the door, went to a cat shrine, then I got insight and wandered around and got here
Rhu: We could go back to the teleporter and get back to that town with all the policemen
Dave slips out of the chainmail and leaves it in a heap on the floor.
Frezak (GM): The city of six million blustering guards.
Apheori (GM): What did you guys do with the stuff in the box
?
Gaurav: Frezak: that's unfair, there was also a philosopher with a pigeon on his head
Rhu: None of that stuff's any use to me. I think we should leave it here, and come back for it if we need it.
Ganelon: Well, I have a rod.
Radek: If it's magical, I can /make/ it useful.
Ganelon: The longsword will be handy, this I guarantee.
Apheori (GM): Where is the sword?
And the books.
Ganelon: I think Gravy has the sword?
Frezak (GM): I don't think I took it out.
Radek examined it.
Ganelon: Well, I guess he can take that too.
Someone else will have to deal with the books. He doesn't have time for rigorous study this night.
Frezak (GM): So is that Dave's HP at... 2?
Apheori (GM): Yes.
And she wants the sword.
Frezak (GM): HINT HINT, HEALER.
Damn.
KILL HER
TAKE THE LOOT
Apheori (GM): Naw, she'll get better.
Unless you kill her.
Ganelon: I don't kill her.
And if she can actually use the sword, she's welcome to have it.
Frezak (GM): Fine.
Apheori (GM): Well, that remains to be seen.
Frezak (GM) grumbles.
Gaurav: Rhu has the shiny light-eating dagger
Ganelon grumbles in tandem.
Apheori (GM): Since apparently she can't use armour either. >.<
Frezak (GM): Remind me what was in the books.
Ganelon: What's her class?
Apheori (GM): Invoker.
Gaurav: I tried to read them but couldn't. THey were in Deresi.
Frezak (GM): What language is Deresi?
Gaurav: them -> the books
Apheori (GM): No, no, you could read them. One was in deresi.
Frezak (GM): As in, from where,
Apheori (GM): Another was full of weird ritual stuff.
Gaurav: "The deresi people aren't very well-liked, beyond being like the common understanding of gypsies you don't really know anything about it. "
Ganelon: Oh yeah, a sword won't do an Invoker any good unless they're an oddball who takes feats for weapon-implement proficiency.
Apheori (GM): One seemed to be a catalogue of grain harvesters.
Frezak (GM): What PLANET are deresi from?
Apheori (GM): You don't know.
Frezak (GM): Ritual book?
Apheori (GM): She's got the feat. Don't ask why or how
Gaurav: If they're gypsy-like, the popular perception would be that they end up everywhere maybe.
Frezak (GM): I can at least look through it to see if there's anything usable.
Across HOLES?
Apheori (GM): But having a feat and actually being able to use it to any effectare completely different things.
Ganelon: If you say so.
Apheori (GM): MAYBE. MAYBE NOT.
Frezak (GM): Technically, she could 'wield' it.
Ganelon: If she proves unable to use it, I'll touch the thing and it will EXPLODE INTO MAGIC DUST
Frezak (GM): DUSSSSST
Rhu: Let me do a perception check on the books to see if anything jumps out. Otherwise, meh. We can come get them later if we need to.
Apheori (GM): ...one of them is a ritual book. You want that.
>.>
Ganelon: Oooh
Frezak (GM): I don't suppose I could use Gravyvision to speed-read them.
Ganelon: What's the ritual?
Gaurav: I wonder what the effect of crit failing a perception check on a book would be.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+12
(
18
)
+12
=
30
Apheori (GM): I forgot.
>.>
Ganelon: ...
Can... can I choose?
Gaurav: I don't want a ritual book. I can't do rituals.
YES
Apheori (GM): What would make sense?
Gaurav: Choose wisely
Ganelon: Give me a theme.
Apheori (GM): My main problem is I have no idea what rituals any of you could necessarily do.
Ganelon: Radek can do all of the non-religion ones.
Apheori (GM): For instance it'd be hilarious to give Amadi something but I have no idea what she can do...
Ganelon: He was built for this sort of thing.
Frezak (GM): I'm helpful because I can't do magic.
Gaurav: Can't druids do rituals? There's a ritual for talking to animals in PHB1 I think.
Ganelon: I took feats just for alchemy and ritual casting. Only one was free.
There are nature rituals.
Bear Soup Guy: Isn't that Animal Messenger?
Because I have that
Ganelon: I don't recall a "speak to animals" one, but Animal Messenger is a thing, yes.
Gaurav: oh right that's what I meant
Ganelon: Now, what I would *like* is Transfer Enchantment since it would let me do stuff like put a +1 on, say, a dagger, and move that to Gravy's shovel. For cheap.
Apheori (GM): It's water walking.
Ganelon: But I was actually planning to shop for such a thing.
Not just find it.
Bear Soup Guy: Of course it's water walking
Dave wonders why anyone would need a ritual to walk on water.
Gaurav: Founding religions
Frezak (GM): You'd best be buffing Greibel's Bong implement.
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Ganelon: I totally will if I can get a +1 thing to transfer the enchant over from.
Otherwise, resources are sparse. I could make a thing +1 but that's about it.
Gaurav: Wasn't there something magical in the chest?
Ganelon: Two things - a sword and a rod.
Apheori (GM): Wait, dammit, that wasn't the water walking one.
Ganelon: I don't know what the rod does.
Apheori (GM): Can I take that back?
Ganelon: I don't mind.
Frezak (GM): ROD OF CAVERNOUS EXPLORATION
It's a maglite.
Ganelon: It will be DUST!
Gaurav: There's a ritual in PHB2 called "Glib Limerick"
And "Pyrotechnics"
Ganelon: Oh yes.
The latter makes fireworks.
Gaurav: "Tree shape"?
Turn into a tree
Apheori (GM): THIS ONE was the floating disk one.
Frezak (GM): If you pick excavation, it's PVP time.
Gaurav: hehe
Apheori (GM): The ritual.
Gaurav: Tenser's
Ganelon: Ooh, nice.
I don't have that one.
Dave takes the sword and puts it on, then looks around for her staff, finds it, reshapes it slightly into more of a can, and then strikes a bit of a pose with it.
Apheori (GM): a cane*
Dave: This is right.
Rhu: It suits you.
If we get moving now, do you think Mr. Mousie can come with us?
Or is the cat not going to let him out of his tank?
Greibel: I think only the cat knows the answer to that
The Gravedigger: Well, at least he can't starve now.
Greibel glares at the sphinx
Dave: Would he starve?
Radek: Never. The Warforged require neither food nor sleep to remain operational.
The Gravedigger: He's probably go even more mad.
Left alone, undying, in the dark.
Dave: Do you?
The Gravedigger: I...
Might want to stay with him.
Rhu: Now that you mention it, I am getting a bit peckish.
Dave: There's a piece of cheese if you want it.
Dave holds up the mouldy hunk of cheese.
Rhu: ... er, no, thanks.
It's a little, err
Off
Dave: Is it?
Okay.
Rhu: It'll make you sick
And you seem pretty sick already
Dave sniffs it.
Gaurav: Is there any food in the Adventurer's Kit?
Frezak (GM): SHould be.
Dave eats the cheese.
Rhu: Ew.
Frezak (GM): Ew.
I'll just see if she pukes.
If not, well.
Rhu: On the plus side, at least it can't kill her. Probably.
Rhu steps away from her anyway
Rhu: So: move on or set up camp?
The Gravedigger: Probably?
Radiant cheese?
I'd... rather not leave Mousie on his own like this.
Rhu: She died and then ... undied. Maybe she'll redie? Who knows?
Death is the strangest of dead ends.
The Gravedigger: Clearly it isn't much a dead end if people plough through it.
Rhu: One person's dead end may be another person's open doorway. But they must not forget that their own dead end is waiting for them.
The Gravedigger: Uh-huh.
Rhu: I think it makes sense to set up camp. Maybe Mousie will be calmer in the morning. Maybe Dave will be feeling better. Or, after that cheese, considerably worse.
Dave: Whaaah.
Rhu: Maybe the cat will eat us all and we won't need to close the holes after all.
The Gravedigger: Maybe we'll get murdered by the cat.
Dave: That was strong.
Greibel: Right. I don't think we should be moving at the moment.
Dave pockets some other stuff out of the chest, including the rest of the books.
Greibel: We need to rest, and I refuse to leave Radek's abomination behind to fend for itself.
Radek scoffs.
Rhu: (to Dave) Thanks! I'd take the books, but I'm already carrying around no end of odds and ends. What's with his partially digested light fixture, for example.
The Gravedigger: I can carry that if you want.
Rhu: Let's move these tables into a square and set up camp in the middle. Give us a bit of cover.
The Gravedigger: Or use the tables to barricade the doors.
Rhu: Naah, it's fine, I -- ew, bit of tentacle
They open outwards.
The Gravedigger: Oh.
Fair point.
Rhu: We could still move them there for cover, in case we're attacked.
Gaurav: How do people usually set a watch? Or should we just let Radek stay up?
Frezak (GM): Well, if we're doing.. 8 hours...
then we each take 2 hours.
UNless Dave doesn't sleep at all.
The sphinx: She's never tried it.
Apheori (GM): Sorry.
Radek: Just push the corpses out of the room first.
Apheori (GM): That wasn't the sphinx.
Ganelon: And he's not a great watchman.
Rhu: Good idea.
And good point.
Frezak (GM): all righty, then.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: The sphinx is talking to the mouseforged.
Greibel listens in
Frezak (GM): oh dear
Can I listen in too?
Apheori (GM): No.
Gaurav: brr
Apheori (GM): Greibel: It's very circular. The sphinx is leading the mouse around its story, never quite getting to any of the real parts.
Discussing smells, walls, settings, times over any incidents.
Gaurav: creepy
How is Mr. Mousie responding to this story?
Bear Soup Guy gives a worried and confused look in Rhu's direction
Apheori (GM): The mouse is filling in the actual details at the promptings.
Bear Soup Guy: Is he talking about being dead or before that?
Gaurav: ... is that story-eating cat playing with its food?
Rhu is getting ready for bed
Apheori (GM): It's unclear.
Gaurav: brr
Apheori (GM): Do you rearrange the furniture? You can.
Also Dave is sitting on a table reading a book with a very strange expression on her face.
Ganelon: Skeletons and the nasty corpse in particular.
They go outside.
Frezak (GM): I'll take first watch.
Ganelon: I'll take a table and chair.
Apheori (GM): Top or bottom?
Frezak (GM): I can take extra watch, since I don't really need the extended rest benefits.
Gaurav: Can we move the chest? We could move the two big tables to one of the corners and set up a little box to hide behind
Ganelon shrugs.
Ganelon: The bottom one looks all set up already.
I'll do my writing there.
Gaurav: Or behind/next to Mr. Mousie if that'd make Greibel/Gravy feel better
With your back to the door?
Frezak (GM): Yeah, that might not be a super idea.
Given that we might have skellies.
Gaurav: Btw: I'll be leaving for class in about 25 mins
And in case I forget to mention this then, a very nice gentleman has offered to remove my wisdom teeth on Monday, so I _might_ miss D&D next week
Frezak (GM): WHAT
BUT YOU NEED WISDOM
YOU'RE THE BLOODY AVENGER
Bear Soup Guy: That sounds like a euphemism for someone planning to beat you up =/
Gaurav: I probably won't miss D&D: I'll be in bed in agony, and won't have much else to do probably, hopefully. So I _should_ be there. But just letting you know in case I don't show.
haha
-2 to WIS
except ... the wisdom teeth are at the back of your mouth? So it'd have to be quite the beating up.
Bear Soup Guy: Punch to the ear region
Gaurav: left and right, up and down
Frezak (GM): Precision punch.
Gaurav: a very skilled beater upper then
Bear Soup Guy: Tooth bullies must be very thorough
Frezak (GM): Called shot: Wisdom Teeth.
He had tiny, but powerful hands.
Gaurav: Frezak: btw I listened to the Dark Sun podcast you recommended, and we need a monk on this team
they could precision punch
maybe
Frezak (GM): YEAH
MONKS
And a Gahj.
Apheori (GM): Right, then.
Show up or I'll... uh...
Frezak (GM): spit goats?
Apheori (GM): I don't know.
Gaurav: force me to drink fizzy drinks through a straw?
apparently that's the worst thing you can do when wisdom toothing
Frezak (GM): Wisdom de-toothing.
Gaurav: Wisdom undead
Frezak (GM): Wisdom toothing would be placing new ones in people's mouths.
Gaurav: A lucrative industry in some countries.
Bear Soup Guy: Or riding an enormous wisdom tooth down a wave or sand dune
Gaurav: o.0
Frezak (GM): ooooh
Apheori (GM): So y'all rest here?
Ganelon: Seems to be the plan!
Frezak (GM): yep.
Rhu is already asleep.
Rhu: How many hours of sleep do we need?
Gaurav: Sorry ooc
Apheori (GM): Not very many.
Frezak (GM): Extended Rest, to recharge surges and powers, is 6 hours.
Gaurav: How do we maintain a watch while we sleep?
Frezak (GM): Easy.
We take 8 hours as a group.
And everyone takes 2 hours.
Of watch.
Apheori (GM): Dave spends the entire time sitting on a table reading a raunchy romance novel.
Gaurav: Ah okay excellent
There were raunchy novels in here?!
Perception fail
Frezak (GM): GAH
OUR QUEST
FAILED
Gaurav: It will be later revealed that this room contains a small switch marked "Holes in the universe: on/off" and we failed perception checks and never saw it
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Apheori (GM): Naw, it just didn't stand out in the box.
Gaurav: Hey, there probably was some sort of hole-related research going on in here at some point, maybe.
Apheori (GM): It had a pretty uninteresting cover like the grain harvesters one.
Bear Soup Guy: I think some of the papers had to do with that
Gaurav: Did we investigate the console and tanks and suchlike? I remember looking through the papers ...
Heh, makes sense.
Apheori (GM): Yeah, they were researching the holes.
You look over some of it again and realise the people in the tanks came out of those holes.
Gaurav: When do we get action points?
Bear Soup Guy: This is the stuff Radek will be studying tonight, yes?
Gaurav: If he doesn't get distracted by the raunchy novels
Ganelon: No, he's making blueprints tonight.
Frezak (GM): We'd have 1 AP after the rest.
Bear Soup Guy: Oh right
Ganelon: Then he's got research notes to study.
And then maybe after that he can get to these foreign books.
Apheori (GM): He'd have to get them from Dave first.
Bear Soup Guy: Right, I meant the research notes
Frezak (GM): What if it's the same thing?
Raunchy Research.
Ganelon: Then it's probably nothing he cares about.
Bear Soup Guy: Research into HOLE SEX
Frezak (GM): hooooles
put things in
things come out
hoooooles
Gaurav: Any research can be made raunchy probably
Ganelon: I'm sure you could research the effectiveness of making research raunchy.
Apheori (GM): You guys are terrible.
Bear Soup Guy: Terribly cute :3
Gaurav: quick, make the cute face!
:3
Frezak (GM): no.
Ganelon: Yeah, I'll pass.
Bear Soup Guy: Suit yourselves
Apheori (GM): So I guess you all rest, you take turns with the watch, nothing really happens, Dave giggles a lot, and The sphinx and mouseforged never stop their... whatever they're doing.
And Radek does whatever the hell Radek does.
Ganelon: Blueprints!
For a rifle and these standard issue laser handguns.
Apheori (GM): Oh, right.
Frezak (GM): I'll maintain my shovels and gear.
Apheori (GM): Amadi also appears next to Greibel and pokes his ear at one point.
Gaurav: pfft
Bear Soup Guy: Greibel probably smiles
Frezak (GM): Wisely.
Mysteriously.
Gaurav: is anybody keeping an eeye on the mouse? Or do we think they'll be fine?
Frezak (GM): Soon, child.
You too will know the secrets of the Ear.
Apheori (GM): The sphinx is.
Gaurav: hes not one of us X-|
anywho, it's Community Ecology o' clock! Thanks for a fun game, see you all next Tuesday with swollen face and less wisdom!
Frezak (GM): We migh as well kill Rhu now.
Bear Soup Guy: Bye Gaurav!
Ganelon: See ya!

Session 15

Apheori (GM): Dundun dun.
Rar.
Bear Soup Guy: rrrrrmbumb
Apheori (GM): Am I authorised to maim people who don't show up?
Bear Soup Guy: In certain locales
Ganelon: It's generally considered a faux-pas.
Apheori (GM): I'll just maim Gaurav, then. Frezak actually has an excuse.
Ellemerr: What if Gaurav does too and you're left with nobody to maim?
Apheori (GM): Then he'll get maimed for that injustice instead.
Oh, apparently he's asleep.
The bastard.
And he's already been maimed. Forgot about that.
Ganelon: Wait, how do you know that?
Apheori (GM): I checked my email.
Ellemerr: Don't listen to her; she's psychic. Just trying to trick you.
Ganelon: Your email tells you that he's asleep?
Apheori (GM): Yes.
It's very sophisticated.
Ellemerr: Possibly, her email is psychic.
Ganelon: I need to get one of those.
Apheori (GM): OKAY.
Y'all fell asleep. Except maybe Radek.
Ganelon: He's close enough to asleep.
Apheori (GM): Gravy, Radek: You awaken to/become aware of a whizzing noise and someone saying 'WHEEEEEE'. It sounds like Dave.
Frezak (GM): my room is full of wood and rubbish.
I'll be around in 20. do things >.>
Apheori (GM): We're now missing two people.
Ellemerr: Oh yeah, you're totally not missing me. At all.
Apheori (GM): There won't be any fun with everyone missing.
Ganelon: Shall we just wait, then?
Apheori (GM): Aye.
Unless Rob wants to... do something dreamy.
Frezak (GM): I can sort of look at my computer every minute or so
Apheori (GM): You know what? Scratch what I just said. Everyone fell asleep. Even Radek sort of dozed off.
Frezak (GM): I have 20 passive perception, I'll have you know.
Asleep, that's 15.
Gravy has... radar.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Frezak (GM): Grave-dar.
Apheori (GM): Amadi's going to send you some dreams.
Frezak (GM): Gravy dreams?
Sounds too... mad for down-in-earth Gravy.
Apheori (GM): You all may have been drugged.
Ellemerr: I don't know how you managed to make me talk you into this. >.<
Frezak (GM): HE IS THE ONLY SANE PERSON ON THIS GORRAM PLANET
Apheori (GM) cackles.
Ganelon: I don't suppose we can refuse these dreams, huh?
Like leaving the mail in the 'box?
Apheori (GM): They're going to happen.
Sorry.
Ganelon: Blast.
This won't win me any friends but I don't like dreams.
Apheori (GM): You need better ones.
Ellemerr: He needs any ones.
Frezak (GM): So.... I'm not needed here anymore?
Ganelon: Actually, yeah. I don't dream.
Apheori (GM): Do your stuff, but check back so you don't miss the dream.
Frezak (GM): Gorram.
Ellemerr: You're good. Go play.
Frezak (GM): What?
Ellemerr: Shoo.
Apheori (GM) dreams.
Frezak (GM): I'm probably ensconced again.
NOT THAT IT MATTERS
Apheori (GM): What does that mean?
Frezak (GM): Means I'm sat in front of my computer, but i/we have been waved away while... someone writes dreams?
Bear Soup Guy: I don't think that's what ensconced means
Frezak (GM): Shh, you.
I know words.
I PROCLAIM ME TO BE RIGHT.
This chair isn't soft enough for me to be really ensconced.
Bear Soup Guy: reclinesconced
Apheori (GM): Did we lose Gan?
Ellemerr wrote one dream. It may be enough for now.
Ganelon: I'm here.
Apheori (GM): Great. Roll20 is lying to me again.
Bear Soup Guy: it does that
Frezak (GM): It's a deception engine.
Bear Soup Guy: a deceptiongine
Frezak (GM): Deceptine?
Nah, that sounds like Cough Syrup.
'Um, yeah. Sure. It'll make them better. Sure."
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Frezak (GM): Sweets.
"yeah, they're healthy? Teeth? This shit iron-plates them. INVINCIBLE TEETH. You should be paying me- so you are. Right, now scram. I hear cops."
Apheori (GM): OKAY.
WE'RE STARTING.
NOW.
SORT OF.
Ganelon: Sort of.
Apheori (GM): What's everyone's passive perception when asleep/asleep-like?
Assuming it's one of the first two stages.
Ganelon: 13.
Bear Soup Guy: Is passive perception when asleep just regular passive perception?
Apheori (GM): But I guess D&D wouln't actually cover the different stages of sleep, let alone the implications of the associated brainwaves...
Regular -5, apparently.
Bear Soup Guy: Right, 15 then
Apheori (GM): Okay. So y'all are asleep.
Ganelon: Yes.
Apheori (GM): Just so we're clear on sourcing, these dreams were written by Ellemerr.
The Commoner in me demands I make this clear.
(To Frezak): The Gravedigger dreams.
Apheori (GM):
You dream of Earth, dark and moist and full of wurms. It surrounds you on all sides, yet you are not Earth. Well, of course you're not Earth. You know Earth. You are not Earth. You're what is left when the Earth is removed. You are black, like a sky once the bright lights are taken out of it, and empty, empty, empty... Struggeling, you reach to grab the Earth that is all around you, so dark and moist, with all its wurms, the lives and the fullness of it. You reach and you grasp and you pull, and it all falls into you, but you feel no less empty. You feel bigger, and more powerful, but also more alone, for the Earth is further away, now. It fears you, or it longs for you, but when you embrace the Earth it falls away and is gone, and you are even more alone with your black and empty sky.
Your dream shifts, and still you are not Earth. You are standing on Earth, feeling its moistness beneath your bare feet, knowing it to be dark and full of wurms. You hold in your right hand your tool that you use to move the Earth, and you stand before a grave, a grave of the Earth. You did not dig this grave. The earth that was moved from it was more than moved, it was re-moved and un-moved and now there's no telling where it is, or if it even is at all. In your left hand you hold a dead chicken. It needs to be buried properly, but you don't think this grave can do that. Proper burial requires the Earth to be moved back into the hole. If the Earth isn't there...
"Are you going to get on with it?" asks the chicken. You don't answer. You're not in the habit of talking with your clientel.
"Look, just pop me in the hole and get on with it," says the chicken. "Quests don't wait for ever, and the library will close eventually. Time is of the essence, you know."
You look at the chicken, then back in the hole. And then you bury it in the blank and empty sky.
Apheori (GM): The dream shifts again and for the briefest moment you see the girl standing behind you, flickering like a bad TV image, first in one colour, then another. The winged kitten on her shoulder hisses at you and she begins to turn to look at you, but before you can see her face...
Dammit.
That was supposed to all be whisper and it killed it.
Gravedigger: That's you.
Bear Soup Guy: WE JUST WON'T READ IT
NOBODY READ THAT
Ellemerr: Yeeeees, they do that when they've got spaces in them. I shoulda warned you. Sorry.
Send them on skype.
Easier to read there, too.
Spaces. Uhm. Paragraphs. That's the word.
Sorry. >.>
Apheori (GM): I'll try it again.
(To Greibel): "Hello," says Amadi. "It was about time you dropped by."
(To Greibel): You're dreaming about a sky, a vast sky full of bright lights, colourful and glorious. You're flying, or swimming, or just being, and you really don't care to find out. You're all alone in the vastness of space, but for Amadi and the chicken. It isn't really space, either; not the dark, empty void that spans between the worlds. This is a place of light. This is the bright and colourful void that spans between -
(To Greibel): "Do you like it?" asks Amadi, cutting off your thoughts before you have time to think them. You nod. You want to tell her just how much you like it, how much better it is than anything you've experienced before in your life, but it is she who holds the words, the great and terrible words one would need to explain a place, a feeling like this, the words that are too big to fit in a mortal mouth. And so you nod, because it's the best you can do.
(To Greibel): "It used to be bigger, you know. She was supposed to govern it, but it's not a thing that lets itself be governed, and after the split... I'm afraid we lost some colours. Or maybe it wasn't even our fault."
(To Greibel): You look closer at Amadi and realize that she isn't that person you've met before, the one who says, after all, that she is not Amadi. Miss Teatime? This one is brighter and more colourful, and you see bits of others in her. Dave. Not Dave, Dawn. And you see something altogether darker, as well.
(To Greibel): "Holes. She never accounted for them. They weren't here yet, and easy to ignore, and now we can't even remember well enough to do something about the ones that seep into our own selves... They weren't supposed to be our problem."
(To Greibel): You see the dark between the stars, the colourful myriads of lights that are far more than mere stars, and the Black Holes among them. They make your head spin and your stomach swirl and your eyes sting and you realize that this is a dream and you ought to wake up so you can find somewhere to go and throw up but you can't, and now you can't look away from the hole that is swallowing up the whole world, all the loveliness of it and you feel like screaming; this is the saddest thing you've ever witnessed, and -
(To Greibel): Suddenly there's a chicken in your face.
(To Greibel): "Dude," says the chicken, "what do you think you're doing? You don't want to be trippin' over there, man! It's bad mojo, like, really, really bad, and besides... aren't you s'posed to be on some quest, man? Dude, the library is totally going to close on you, and that librarian might not take kindly to not being rescued on time! Man, librarians can be some mean bitches when you don't do things on time, oooh boy, did I tell you about that time when -"
(To Greibel): The sudden silence is the most harrowing thing you have never heard. The black hole is right in front of your face, and the chicken is gone, and you think you might die, or go mad, or something even worse, if you fall in after it, and -
(To Greibel): Amadi spins you around; she's strong for someone so little. Or maybe you're just very light. You look into her eyes and you open your mouth and you're about to tell her...
(To Greibel): YOUR DREAM.
Apheori (GM): Greibel
s worked.
Ohay, read your dreams.
Apheori (GM) waves dismissively.
Ganelon: Is mine there?
Apheori (GM): Gravy, Greibel: You awaken to hear Dave saying 'WHEEEEEE' as she flies overhead and then notice some other things - the porridge has eaten most of the zombie corpse bits; the sphinx fell asleep and drooled all over the mouseforged, which appears to be leaking something strange and silvery; Dave got into Radek's things, borrowed some books, and made herself a floating disk and started whizzing around the room on it; and Amadi is sitting upside-down on the ceiling juggling geese.
Gan: Coming. You're still asleep.
Ganelon: Just making sure.
(To Radek): You dream of -
(To Radek): No.
(To Radek): You're working. You never fell asleep; you would never fall asleep. You're working. Mending, repairing, breaking down, reassembling, making, creating... working.
(To Radek): So far you have made fifty bombs, a spaceship, a particularly good coffee-machine, a rather imperfect sandwitch, a chicken, a whole pen of mouseforged, a pen (to hold animal-machines), a pen (to write with), half-score bottled genies, one of them even more or less functional, although very rude, and on a special request you've mended a broken mask. That was a touch one, and something about the mask made you just itch behind your skin and under your nails and in the back of your eyes, but the payment was good. Currently you're working on a perfect rendition of the whole universe. You've managed the bright bits fairly well, but you're having trouble with the holes, and find yourself wishing you had Gravy to help you. He's good with holes. But unlike you, he's asleep. Everyone's asleep, even the mouseforged, everyone except you and the chicken.
(To Radek): "You're never going to get that right, you know," comments the chicken. It's been giving unhelpful comments like this all alone. You don't want to recall all the atrocities it mentioned while you were working on the mask.
(To Radek): "It's not conductive at all. You don't have the proper tools, you don't even have the proper blueprints. And by this point, it's changing too fast and you won't manage to update it before it's all gone dark. You should focus on your quest. You should find the bound librarian. Sometimes, you don't need to know exactly how something is supposed to be in order to fix it. Just try harder, and remember to -"
(To Radek): The chicken makes a squeeky sound before going silent, and you deign it the briefest glance to notice that the annoying mad girl is holding it by the neck. "Sorry," she whispers, "It got away from me. Won't happen again; promise." And she steps back and away and leave you to your work.
(To Radek): While you looked away, though, the model became all mangled. You're going to have to start over...
Greibel: This is better than breakfast in bed.
Dave: Wheeeeeeee!
Dave tries to fly up a wall and nearly falls off the disk.
Greibel: Don't crash into the geese! They'll fall...up!
Greibel watches Dave intently while occasionally glancing up at Amadi
Greibel definitely loads his bong accordingly
Apheori (GM): I think we lost Frezak.
Bear Soup Guy: I think we did
Amadi juggles geese.
Ganelon: I see him on R20.
And I'm done reading.
Apheori (GM): Can either of you poke him some other way so he's paying attention?
Bear Soup Guy: Thanks for the dreams, Ellemerr :)
Ganelon: Nothing more effective than this.
And yes, it was a lovely dream.
Except it wasn't a dream. It was work.
Totes.
Amadi: It totally was.
Ellemerr: Ugh. OOC.
And you're all very welcome.
Though they were very hasty and weird and I don't really know what I was doing.
But that's normal.
Bear Soup Guy: So they were like real dreams then =P
Ellemerr: I do believe there was a reason I was asked/volunteered.
*shifty eyes*
Apheori (GM): So I guess Frezak isn't coming at all.
Meow meow meow meow meow meow meow.
Bear Soup Guy: turtles
Gaurav: turtles?
Apheori (GM): IS EVERYONE HERE?
IS IT LYING TO ME AGAIN?
Ganelon: I am.
Bear Soup Guy: SOMETHING SOMTHING SOMETHING
Gaurav: I may be here.
And still waiting to here what BSG has to say about turtles.
Bear Soup Guy: turtles are cute ^_^
Frezak (GM): EGGS
Apheori (GM): Okay it's lying.
Does anyone remember where we were?
Frezak (GM): 5 minutes >.>
Ganelon: Yeah, it was something about dreams and then Dave made a floating disk.
Frezak (GM): She Tenser'd
Ganelon: After stealing from me. Ungrateful zombie.
Apheori (GM): Right.
Hee.
Gaurav: Why were we all asleep? I thought the plan two weeks ago was to switch watch?
Were we enchanted?
Apheori (GM): It was, but you fell asleep and started dreaming.
Bear Soup Guy: Magic sleep gas
Apheori (GM): Well, the others did. Rhu didn't dream anything that you can recall.
Gaurav: In Ancient Rome, soldiers on watch who fell asleep would be stoned to death :-/
yay!
Apheori (GM): This isn't Rome.
Oaky, so I'm just going to redo the description so we're all on the same page.
Frezak (GM): Greibel is already stoned.
Apheori (GM): Aside from Radek, who was working on stuff and not really paying attention, you all decided to rest for what may or may not have been the night, taking turns keeping watch.
Frezak (GM): Just not lapidated.
Rhu: Frezak++
Gaurav: sorry OOC
Apheori (GM): But the watch didn't really pan out.
Frezak (GM): Don't we have time-telling devices?
Apheori (GM): Gravy, Greibel: You awaken to hear Dave saying 'WHEEEEEE' as she flies overhead and then notice some other things - the porridge has eaten most of the zombie corpse bits; the sphinx fell asleep and drooled all over the mouseforged, which appears to be leaking something strange and silvery; Dave got into Radek's things, borrowed some books, and made herself a floating disk and started whizzing around the room on it; and Amadi is sitting upside-down on the ceiling juggling geese.
Frezak (GM): I will sigh.
Apheori (GM): Dave whizzes past saying 'Wheee!'.
Rhu continues to sleep
Ganelon: Miniature geese, I hope.
Apheori (GM): Radek: You notice as well, having finished whatever you were doing.
The Gravedigger: I thought I was going to go and fight strange monsters.
Ganelon: Otherwise they'd be quite awkward to juggle.
Apheori (GM): Nope, full-sized geese. You don't know how she's doing it.
Gaurav: How are the geese reacting to being juggled? On the other hand: breakfast!
The Gravedigger: Battle wondrous beasts, bury them, go home, get money, go on holiday.
Apheori (GM): They seem confused.
Radek: Where's... where's that chicken gone?
I was about to immolate it. Bloody pessimist.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: The commotion wakes you as well.
Frezak (GM): I fill find biscuits and be miserable.
Apheori (GM): As you do so, Dave crashes into a nearby wall and slides off the disk.
Dave: Ow.
Rhu opens one eye, looks at Dave, looks at Amadi, and then closes his one open eye as tightly as he can.
Rhu: Five more minutes.
Amadi: Good morning.
Frezak (GM): I'll go see how the Mouseforged is doing.
Apheori (GM): So dave's lying in this awkward upside-down position against the wall.
It looks... weird.
Oozing. Almost like it's slightly melted.
The mouseforged, I mean.
Does.
Is.
Greibel did in fact start smoking and grinning as soon as he saw all this crazy stuff
The Gravedigger: Radek!
melty robot!
Rhu opens both his eyes and stares at the ceiling for a minute, waiting until he can be properly resigned to his lot.
Radek: Hrm?
Apheori (GM): Amadi loses control of the geese and they all fall on Rhu.
...and start squacking indignantly.
Rhu: IN THE NAME OF ---
Ganelon: Honk.
Apheori (GM): And flapping around.
Ganelon: Honk honk.
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Rhu gets up covered in feathers and, soon, bruises
Amadi: Tarnation and blimey!
Ganelon: Okay, so... melty robot. Sounds bad.
Amadi: Buggery planks!
Obsequious goat blowers!
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+8 acrobatics check to dodge geese over this table
(
4
)
+8
=
12
Ganelon: I mean, I know that Warforged apparently have some weird blood surrogate, but that would also be a bad thing to be leaking.
Amadi: Dementian blasting!
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You run into a goose while dodging, but get over the table unharmed.
Gan: It's leaking.
Ganelon: Leaking what!?
Apheori (GM): Silvery stuff!
Gaurav: Do the geese pursue Rhu? If not, he's going to walk over to Dave and help her up.
Frezak (GM): could be cheese.
Apheori (GM): You're the one who knows about warforged - is that normal?
Ganelon: Well, no!
Apheori (GM): Also there's a sphinx drooling on it.
It's still asleep.
Frezak (GM): THE TIME IS NOW
COUP DE GRACE
Apheori (GM): Naw, the geese are running away from everyone now.
Radek: You wanted danger, Gravy?
Remove the cat.
Gaurav: Oh good.
Apheori (GM): XD
Radek takes a step backwards.
Frezak (GM): I ready my best shovel.
Radek: Your Mouseforged is leaking.
Gaurav: Actually, Rhu is going to hang about here and watch Gravy.
Frezak (GM): I'll take a golfing stance.
LImber up my shoulders.
Ganelon: Somehow it's going to end up on one of our faces. I'm sure of it.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: They don't follow. And Dave yells at him before he can actually do anything.
Something about breaking her spine.
Oh.
Ghah.
Well, she still complains about having broken her spine, but I guess nobody notices except maybe Greibel.
The sphinx snores.
Ganelon: It would be insensitive to just ignore that, but we're talking about a robot in distress here!
Frezak (GM): Let's see, here.
SHovel attack... prone, unconcious.
Dave slowly slides down onto the floor, glaring at nothing in particular.
Frezak (GM): FOOOOOOOORE
rolling 1D20+7+5+2
(
15
)
+7+5+2
=
29
Rhu holds his breath
Dave: You... attacked the sphinx?
Frezak (GM): I'm swatting it.
Dave: With a shovel.
Frezak (GM): BRAVE, LIKE BEAR.
Dave: I... can't...
Frezak (GM): You said it was super tought!
Dave continues to lie there.
Frezak (GM): *tough*
The Gravedigger: It's magic, it'll be fine.
Apheori (GM): That's an attack roll?
Frezak (GM): Yeah.
Ganelon: Damn, man. Sooo close to a critical.
Amadi falls off the ceiling.
Apheori (GM): Well, the sphinx is pushed off the mouseforged like a sack of potatoes.
Unlike a sack of potatoes, it wakes up.
The Gravedigger: Mr Mousie!
Are you allright?
Apheori (GM): How much damage did you do?
Frezak (GM): Um.
Gaurav: Where did Amadi fall?
Frezak (GM): Well, I wasn't making a Coup De grace.
So this is... uh....
Apheori (GM): Whereever Rhu was. I forgot, so... thereish.
Gaurav: That's exactly where he was!
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D10+4
(
1
)
+4
=
5
See?
Apheori (GM): You hit it with a shovel. That does damage.
Frezak (GM): A gentle shove.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
So it's annoyed.
Frezak (GM): MOre like a caress.
It's always annoyed.
Gaurav: A gentle, metallic caress.
Frezak (GM): Shovellullar love.
Apheori (GM): So there's a pile of somewhat upset upside-down cat on the floor.
And there's a pile of mouseforged in the tank.
It's not doing anything.
Greibel can't take it anymore and cracks up laughing hysterically
Apheori (GM): It's rather wet.
Ganelon: Not good.
Dave: Glad someone is amused.
Radek: Open the tank!
Frezak (GM): I OPEN THE TANK
Amadi gets up and looks around as though seeing the room for the first time.
Amadi: HI ROOM!
Ganelon: You're a great assistant, Gravy.
Apheori (GM): It was already open.
Sphinx was on it.
But anyway.
Ganelon: Oh, whoops.
Gaurav: Does the sphinx show any sign of looking to attack Gravy? Or anyone?
The Gravedigger: Greibel, I think Sandwich lady is too high.
Dave: ...hi?
Apheori (GM): The sphinx has started licking itself.
So... no.
...maybe.
Depending on how familiar you are with cats.
Ganelon: It's formulating grudges.
Frezak (GM): I'm expecting some cat ambush later.
Greibel: You're not too high until....uh.....
Greibel starts laughing again
Amadi starts laughing as well.
Ganelon: Okay, pretty much any kind of leaking is bad here, but the first thing I want to figure out is what the Mouseforged needs this silvery stuff for.
And where it's leaking out of. Those two are probably related.
Gaurav: Rhu is pretty familiar with cats, there were many around where he grew up. But he's not familiar with sphinxes, and licking itself seems like a fairly non-aggressive thing for a cat to be doing, so he walks over to Dave.
Rhu: (to Dave) Are you okay?
Frezak (GM): Gan. Radek no longer has his Pewter Surfer costume, right?
Ganelon: Correct.
Apheori (GM): Do warforged have any localised processing functions and memory/storage, or is it distributed?
Frezak (GM): Okay.
Dave: I'm great.
Frezak (GM): GO to the teleport room, and make it pull through whatever's waiting.
Dave: I'm just waiting for my spine to regrow.
Frezak (GM): Because It might think the stuff was a lifeform.
Ganelon: Their OS is a soul.
Frezak (GM): And then, you get it back, ad poke the silver.
Rhu: ...
Frezak (GM): And become the Herald of Galactus.
Apheori (GM): But what does the soul run on?
Ganelon: But I think you're actually describing computer terms I'm not familiar with.
Rhu: (to Dave) oh ... kay ...
Apheori (GM): >.<
Ganelon: Because I'm a programmer of games.
Gaurav: Is the soul all in one place (in the skull or heart or somewhere) or is it in multiple places?
Ganelon: I don't actually know a whole lot about the more fundamental hardware/software stuff.
Apheori (GM): That.
What Gaurav said.
Gaurav: P.S. I'm about to have my first carbonated drink since my wisdom teeth extraction. Wish me luck.
Apheori (GM): I suggest not using a straw.
It's probably fine by now, but still.
Ganelon: Oh.
Gaurav: It is, but no, no straw.
Ganelon: I'd say one place.
Apheori (GM): What place?
It's leaking from there.
Ganelon: Well they're humanoid robots, so probably the heart because nobody's ever creative about this sort of thing.
Also, shit.
Frezak (GM): Shit?
You want to check it's colon?
Ganelon: This is bad.
Frezak (GM): Liquid soul!
I start trying to mop it up.
Into a mug.
Gaurav: If it's the head, then you can do that cool thing where you can take its head with you and talk to it on occasion.
Frezak (GM): Except I doubt Mr Mousie is a great conversationalist.
Ganelon: "What say you, Mouseforged?"
"Squeak. Squeak."
"You always know how to cheer me up, Mouseforged. A-ha-ha-ha!"
Frezak (GM): GO FOR THE EYES, MOUSIE
*fling*
Gaurav: More fun than dragging a torso around with us, is all I'm saying.
hahaha
Frezak (GM): What, you want us to DECAPITATE HIM?
YOU MONSTER
Ganelon: Okay, so I guess this probably requires a magical check-up first.
Frezak (GM): You better have great AC? Mr AVenger.
Apheori (GM): You get some of it into the mug, but aren't very successful.
Ganelon: I want to know how the mouse soul is looking.
Frezak (GM): I TRY HARDER
Apheori (GM): Also it seems to be mixed with a bit of cat drool.
Frezak (GM): AAAAAGH
Gaurav: better than leaving him behind!
Frezak (GM): GORRAM CAT
Apheori (GM): YOU GET MORE INTO THE MUG!
Frezak (GM): SHALAS COUL TAKE YOU, CAT
Amadi suddenly stops laughing and just stares off into space as though shocked at something.
Ganelon: Arcana, then?
Amadi turns her head slowly toward Gravy and the others, and says, "Tofu?"
Gaurav: Rhu wanders over to the north door and has a look in the corridor
Apheori (GM): Aye.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+11
(
20
)
+11
=
31
Oh, phew.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: The corridor is dark and not very interesting. You can check for specific things if you'd like.
The Gravedigger: What, Sandwich Lady?
Apheori (GM): Radek: The mouse soul looks fine. This seems to be... the... other soul?
Amadi: TOFU!
Frezak (GM): Oh, shit.
OH NO.
NO NO NO.
BURN IT
Gaurav:
rolling 1d20+11 for signs of life in the corridor -- either current, or any sign that someone might have passed to since we dragged the dead elf out here
(
4
)
+11
=
15
Frezak (GM): BURN IT ALL
Ganelon: When did another soul get in here?
Frezak (GM): WE HAVE DONE SOMETHING VERY WRONG
Greibel expresses exaggerated shock at the statement and looks around
Frezak (GM): BURN IT ALLLLL
Apheori (GM): Gaurav: Seems to be nothing.
Frezak (GM): Get your bombs, Gan.
Radek: Oh!
Well that explains it.
Gaurav:
rolling 1d20+11 same check for the southern corridor
(
16
)
+11
=
27
Apheori (GM): Gaurav: You sense there may be undead in that direction.
Radek: The Mouseforged is leaking out remnants of a second soul because it wasn't designed to house two of them!
Ganelon: Spoken like nothing is wrong with that statement.
Apheori (GM): Well, it originally came with a soul. This might be that.
The Gravedigger: Oh, hells.
Radek: Here, let me see that cup.
Ganelon: I want to see if there's any "mouse" in the cup.
The Gravedigger: This has demon cat dribble in it.
Gaurav: The undead we saw when we came from the transporter along this corridor, or fresh -- er, less fully dead -- one?
Radek: That's probably fine.
Apheori (GM): Also, if I don't respond to something, poke me about. Sometimes I just miss stuff. >.<
Gaurav: Probably just the same. It's not a strong or immediate sense.
Is it possible to steal someone else's floating disk?
Rhu: What is the demon cat dribble like? Is it magical?
Apheori (GM): Arcana!
Frezak (GM): No, disks are stuck to the owner.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+11
(
19
)
+11
=
30
Apheori (GM): Stuck how?
Ganelon: I'm on fire today.
Frezak (GM): COntrol can't be taken.
Ganelon: Mental control belongs to the ritual caster.
Apheori (GM): What was this check for, exactly?
Frezak (GM): Magicalness of dribble?
Ganelon: For the cup of silvery stuff and cat spit.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Ganelon: I mean, I was specifically looking to see if there was any mouse soul in it.
Apheori (GM): There does not appear to be any mouse in it, but it does seem to be full of... other memory.
And fine, the dribble is magical. You happy?
Frezak (GM): I feel that my character's expertise is not the most valuable knowledge in this endeavour.
Amadi: Greibel! Have you made room for the tuna?
Tuna!
Greibel: I've always got room for tuna!
Amadi: Where is it?
Radek: ...Yes, good.
Amadi: Where is it!
Greibel points to his stomach
Greibel: In here!
Amadi: WHERE IS IT!
Radek: The mouse soul isn't leaking out. It's the other one instead.
The Gravedigger: WHEW
Greibel: Cool it! We'll find it!
The Gravedigger: I was worried for a bit.
Amadi: YAY!
Wait, what?
Apheori (GM): Meanwhile Dave pulls herself back onto the disk and proceeds to lie on that instead of the floor.
Radek: That said, it would be helpful to gather up what we can of this one.
It has a memory I should like to dig through.
Ganelon: We're probably going to need something bigger than a cup for that.
The Gravedigger: You can have my mug.
Radek: Thank you.
Bear Soup Guy: I'm hoping that Radek literally reads its mind by rummaging through the weird liquid
Ganelon: He scrutinizes it with a microscope and then stirs.
Apheori (GM): Aww.
Ganelon: That's not a legit action.
He doesn't do that. Yet.
Apheori (GM): So you gather up as much as you can. It's full of drool, but you seem to get most of it.
And the thing has stopped leaking.
So there's that.
Ganelon: Excellent.
I'll put it into something a little more secure than a cup (like a stoppered flask) and finally direct my attention towards Dave.
Apheori (GM): Dave is lying on a disk looking disgruntled.
Radek: You made this?
Dave: I guess?
Radek: Well, you're the one commanding it, at least.
Why are you lying like that?
Dave: My spine is broken.
It'll regrow.
I think.
Radek: Unfortunate. I recommend ceramic reinforcement if that happens often.
Rhu: I've never heard of stuff like that, spines regrowing by themselves. Does that happen often?
Dave: I don't know if it does or not.
Frezak (GM): Ceramics? REALLY?
Taht's for thermal protection or ablative armour.
Ganelon: Yes.
Apheori (GM): Ceramics are actually incredibly strong.
Or they can be.
Frezak (GM): IN future times?
Ganelon: Do you really want heat-conductive metal fused to your spine?
Apheori (GM): Dude, she would.
Rhu: Gan: oof
Frezak (GM): I don't want ceramics!
Ganelon: She's weird.
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Ganelon: Most people with functioning nerves don't enjoy the touch of sun-baked metal.
Apheori (GM): Most people.
Frezak (GM): An external spine, now?
Ganelon: No, no.
Frezak (GM): Madness.
Ganelon: But I'm pretty sure that metal prosthetics do get really uncomfortable in hot temperatures.
Frezak (GM): Future metals, man.
Amadi walks over to Dave and straightens out her spine.
Amadi: There. All fixed.
Ganelon: ...Is it actually all fixed, or just straight?
Apheori (GM): Hard to tell.
Gaurav: o.0
Frezak (GM): HEAL CHECK
Apheori (GM): Dave doesn't seem to want to test it. She's not moving and looking slightly worried.
Frezak (GM): Anyone have Heal?
It's Wis.
I have 2.
Rhu?
Ganelon: I have 8.
Gaurav: My heal is +9
Bear Soup Guy: I have uh
10 I think, I'll check
Frezak (GM): WELL FUCK YOU GUYS
Gaurav: but the last time I tried to heal Dave, I killed her, so I'm going to hang back
Bear Soup Guy: Yeah, 10
Frezak (GM): I HAVE 18 STR.
AND I CAN'T LIFT SHIT.
Ganelon: Because while it would be amusing to have the guy tossing out med-hypos to have no actual medical knowledge, it would also be incredibly dangerous.
Apheori (GM): Dude, you tried lifting a car!
Gaurav: A cat big enough to hold us all
car*
Apheori (GM): Well, someone try something.
Greibel composes himself and then walks over to Dave
Greibel: Open your mouth and say "ah"
Greibel chuckles a bit before straightening back up
Dave: Dave does so, looking confused.
Oops.
Apheori (GM): THAT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE A /ME
Bear Soup Guy: What die do I use for a heal roll?
Apheori (GM): d20 + mod
Gaurav: It's a skill
Bear Soup Guy: Ah, right-o
Oh duhr, I should have known that >_<
Greibel: How many fingers am I holding up?
Greibel keeps changing the number of fingers and switches hands occasionally
Frezak (GM): Just change what KIND of hand.
Greibel:
rolling 1d20+10 then he whacks her on the back by surprise
(
8
)
+10
=
18
Dave: Nine so far?
Agh!
Apheori (GM) almost falls off the disk, and then it starts floating away.
Dave almost falls off the disk, and then it starts floating away.
Apheori (GM): Ghuh.
Tabs, that's the proper handling for this sort of thing. Not selects.
Select elements are horrible.
Unless you're selecting language or something.
Bear Soup Guy: I agree
Apheori (GM): They're okay for one-time things.
But that's it.
Okay, so Dave floated away from Greibel.
But she's also moving again, and tries sitting up.
Greibel: Another satisfied customer
Ganelon: Oh, right.
Apheori (GM): And having determined she seems to be fine again, makes herself comfortable.
Ganelon: These HP bars remind me that we should be healthy again after an extended rest.
Bear Soup Guy: That we should
Dave glides over to Radek.
Dave watches him, possibly uncomfortably.
Rhu: If we're done here, we should get a move on. There are undead down this way, but I don't think there's too many of them.
Radek: ...Did you want something, Dave?
Apheori (GM): That's the way you came, though.
What about the other way?
PANIC.
PAAAAANIC.
Gaurav: I thought the corridor went on past this door?
Ganelon: Isn't that the way that someone else came in?
Apheori (GM): ...sorry.
Well, yes.
You all cam in that way.
Ganelon: I thought we approached this room from two different directions.
Apheori (GM): But the others came from one direction down that corridor, and you from the other.
Gaurav: oh!
yeah, I thought Greibel came in through the north door too
Frezak (GM): We could just smash our way to the teleporter?
Dave: Probably. I should know what, shouldn't I?
But I should know a lot of things.
Rhu: I'd like to find out where we were transported to when we came here: same planet, different planet, space ship ...
Dave: We're underground.
Rhu: These tanks that Amadi keeps appears in, they're not teleports, are they?
Greibel: I don't remember teleporting anywhere
Apheori (GM): Radek at least would know they're basic holding tanks, and not very good ones, at that.
Rhu: (to Dave) Oh, are we? We got here through a teleport, but the other end of the teleport is underground too. Under a well in the town of Coffle, the seat of Deslan, on That Planet Which Only Had The One Big Hole
Apheori (GM): Amadi disappears.
You may or may not even notice.
Ganelon: She does that a lot. At the very least I wouldn't react strongly.
Gaurav: Rhu does, since he's looking towards everybody else. But he pays it no heed.
Dave: There is a lot of rock up there. (points up*
*
Rhu: (to Greibel) Maybe you were teleported and you didn't notice?
Greibel: That is...
Greibel looks at his bong
Greibel: Totally possible
Rhu nods at Greibel
Rhu: (to Dave) How do you know we're underground?
Amadi appears behind Greibel.
Dave: I just... do?
I can sense the rock. Rock and space. It has warmth.
Frezak (GM): DO THE STONES SING TO ME?
Apheori (GM): No.
Frezak (GM): Bah.
Gaurav: How warm is it in here?
Rhu: If there's anything left to explore in the southern corridor, I think we should explore that first. I remember we stopped looked when we heard voices and come in here. Once we're done investigating there, we can go through the north door.
Apheori (GM): Not decidedly warm, but not cold. A bit chilly.
A bit damp.
Amadi whispers in Greibel's ear: "Dribbly and full of goo."
Greibel straightens up, a bit confused
The Gravedigger: All right!
Let's go exploring!
Ganelon: Let's get the Mouseforged moving before we just abandon it here.
Amadi: Jiggly and full of juice!
Ganelon: Nobody asked about the porridge, too.
These aren't even my pets and I take better care of them than you blackhearts.
Apheori (GM): XD
Rhu: Oh, right, the Mouseforged.
Apheori (GM): The porridge is a lot bigger than it was, but it's just sitting there.
Rhu: The porridge just .. is. The Mouseforged less so. And it'd probably be a good idea to lose the sphinx at some point, if such things were possible.
Gaurav: Damnit, I forgot the porridge has its own avatar. That's hilarious.
The porridge jiggle jiggle
The Gravedigger: Rhu, everything you says sounds full of wisdom.
Amadi mutters to herself about mean, cold-hearted individuals and clucks disapprovingly.
Amadi then walks over and picks up the sphinx and puts it on like a hat.
Gaurav: That +4 WIS really shining through, huh.
Frezak (GM): Gravy is blinded.
Hopefully his muscles can gleam you into blindly following him one day.
Ganelon: I think he's already blindly following you.
Gaurav: Rhu will follow anybody leading us down this corridor, for instance.
Frezak (GM): HAVE AT THEE, CORRIDOR.
I'll swish my shovel at the darkness.
Dave floats her disk over toward the corridor as well.
Gaurav: Where does Dave go in our usual walking order?
Apheori (GM): The darkness makes funny noises and disperses a bit.
Rhu: That's ... worrying. What about the Mouseforged?
The Gravedigger: I'm not sure darkness should make noises.
Amadi: Hey, don't do that!
Rhu: Definitely prefer silent darkness, myself.
We still have torches, don't w-- (to Amadi) Eh?
The Gravedigger equips horn-light-things.
Ganelon: I would like to be quite sure that the Mouseforged is okay now that all its excess soul has been removed.
Amadi: What did the darkness ever do to you?
The Gravedigger: It made me trip!
And ate my lunch!
Ganelon: And to think, without wasting years in a Jazz career no less.
Amadi: That wasn't very nice of it.
Rhu: Radek: Good point. Do it. We'll wait.
Apheori (GM): DOOO IT.
Gaurav: I guess Heal checks are useless against the Mouseforged? Only Arcana checks will do?
Apheori (GM): Yes.
It seems fine, but you'll need to do a check and maybe get it onto its feet?
Hard to say.
Or you could load it onto Dave's disk if you want to take it with you.
Gaurav: Have we figured out Dave's class yet?
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+11
(
8
)
+11
=
19
Hrm.
Frezak (GM): Dave's Class is 'Whatever'.
Whateverer.
Ganelon: Well, I don't know if I'm actually strong enough to pick it up, if it's not putting most of the effort in already.
Apheori (GM): Gravy is the one who cares.
Yeah, it seems fine to you. Try smacking it.
Radek smacks the Mouseforged sternly.
The Gravedigger: Hey!
That doesn't look like science!
THat's animal cruelty!
Or robot cruelty.
Or something.
Ganelon: Does it get up?
Apheori (GM): It wakes up and makes mouse noises.
Gaurav: Yay!
The Gravedigger: Hey, Mr Mousie!
Yoo-hoo!
Oh, sorry.
Squeak, squeak.
Radek: I know what I'm doing.
The Gravedigger: Well, you're not going to say otherwise ever if you were!
Apheori (GM): The mouseforged gets up and falls over.
Rhu: Oof.
Careful, Mr. Mousie.
Ganelon: I'll take my usual spot of "behind all the thugs" in this marching order.
The Gravedigger: Hrrrm.
Can we borrow your disk, Davenotdave?
Dave: What?
Oh... I suppose.
Dave looks reluctant.
Apheori (GM): ...mostly to get up.
Frezak (GM): What?
Apheori (GM): She's sitting on it.
Ganelon: Honestly, she's so light you could probably just give her a piggyback ride.
Or... whatever the "standing upright" version of those are called.
Frezak (GM): She can sit on the mouseforged once the latter is on the disk.
Ganelon: Ah, of course.
Frezak (GM): Unless he's made of neutronium.
Gaurav: I'm not sure how stable a tiny Whateverer perched on a robot sitting on a disk which is floating in mid-air will be, but
anything to get us out this door, really
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Frezak (GM): yeah >.>
Rhu: We could leave Mr. Mousie in here. If the corridor goes somewhere interesting, we'll come back for him. Otherwise, we'll need to teleport out, and we'd be apssing by this room anyway.
Frezak (GM): Yeah.
He's not going anywhere >.>
Ganelon: So you say.
Frezak (GM): Put him in a tank or something!
SOMETHING
THe tanks close, right?
We can just lock him in.
And get going.
Ganelon: Fine, but if that upsets Greibel I'm not claiming responsibility for it.
Dave slides off the disk and bounces it off Gravy a few times.
Frezak (GM): What, like a slowmo horizontal yo-yo?
Rhu: We could tip one of the tanks over and roll it down the corridor. We'd have to pad it reaaaaallllyyy well though.
Radek: ...No, I think it would prefer isolation to that.
The Gravedigger: that'd take ages.
I could just DRAG him.
Oh, thanks, Davenotdave.
Frezak (GM): I'll heave Mousie on it AND ON WE GO
Gaurav: TO MYSTERY!
Dave eyes it suspiciously and then doesn't climb on top.
Ganelon: TO UNDEAD!
Rhu: How's your back, Dave?
Gaurav: I guess Gravy-with-the-glowing-horns is in the lead?
Frezak (GM): I'm the defender.
's my job to stand and take hits.
Also means I can Gravycharge.
Bear Soup Guy: THE GRAVY TANK
Dave: A back.
Frezak (GM): HAH
Dave: Train.
Apheori (GM): ooc
Gaurav: Okay, so we walk out into the southern corridor. Gravy ahead, then me, Radek and Greibel.
Where should Dave be?
Ganelon: She's some kind of wizardly sort, so probably around the middle where it's safest.
Bear Soup Guy: ^
Gaurav: Between me and Radek then.
LET'S GO
Bear Soup Guy: ONWARD TO GLORY
And pie
Frezak (GM): And hideous abominations.
Gaurav: And pie
DM?
Apheori (GM): Right, you move on.
Dave and Amadi wind up side-by-side not talking to each other.
Frezak (GM): Oh dear.
Gaurav: I'll need to leave for class in another 55 minutes or so.
Apheori (GM): Okay. >.<
You encounter a closet.
Wait, which way do you go?
Gaurav: Sorry.
We came in from the left of the map, so towards the right?
Apheori (GM): The way Greibel came from?
Okay.
You encounter a closet.
Rhu opens the closet
Apheori (GM): You encounter a solid wall of ice.
Frezak (GM): YOU FOOL
THERE IS NO ICE
Rhu: ...
Frezak (GM): ONLY ZUUUUUUL
Ganelon: I was totally expecting there to be skeletons in the closet.
Frezak (GM): I was expecting 70 zombies.
Rhu touches ice wall
Frezak (GM): Since a time in L4D when I found 0 zombies in a bathroom.
Apheori (GM): It's ice.
Rhu: Huh.
Frezak (GM): GRAVY SMASH
Or not?
Smashy?
Rhu: Why not?
Ganelon: Why not?
Rhu shines a light at the ice to see if I can see anything beyond it
Bear Soup Guy: We could try to melt it with FIRE BIRDS
Apheori (GM): Rhu: It looks pretty solid.
Rhu checks the closet door to see if there's a sign marked "ICE"
Frezak (GM): I have Roots of Stone that 'Creates a zone of rippling Earth" that might be used to churn up some ice into slushpuppies.
Dave: Ice?
Apheori (GM): No sign.
Frezak (GM): Ice-closet, of course.
Ganelon: Actually, we could try to melt it too.
Gaurav: "Dry riser and ice wall"
Ganelon: I have Alchemist's Fire.
Frezak (GM): Have you tried melting a block of solid ice with fire?
Rhu: (to Dave) Yes, ice.
In a closet. Underground.
Without a sign.
The Gravedigger: You expect things to make sense now?
The Gravedigger scoffs.
The Gravedigger scoff again.
The Gravedigger thinks scoffing is fun.
Gaurav: A good scoff is its own reward.
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20+12 Nature to see if I can find out how the ice got there or something?
(
2
)
+12
=
14
Apheori (GM): BSG: It appears to have... frozen.
The entire room froze.
Filled with something and froze.
Bear Soup Guy: So it's an ice closet then
Wait, is it specifically water ice or some other substance?
Rhu: This whole place is kind of damp. I guess that's just 'cos we're underground?
Apheori (GM): It looks like water, and it didn't take Rhu's hand off.
The Gravedigger: Melt some.
See if it's salt or sweet water.
If it's salt water, maybe leave it alone.
Bear Soup Guy: ah, good idea
Rhu: Is it fire bird time?
Bear Soup Guy: Fire bird or alchemist's fire
Frezak (GM): Fire bird is free.
Ganelon: Bird's a renewable resource.
Frezak (GM): Bring on the birds!
Bear Soup Guy: Ah, okay
Ganelon: Napalm is nice because it blasts an area.
But if we're just melting the water to taste it, that's not necessary.
Bear Soup Guy: Should I do an attack roll against an ice wall or do we just assume that a wall of ice is bad at dodging fire birds?
Gaurav: You should attack roll. You might fall over or something.
Apheori (GM): Do it.
Bear Soup Guy: right-o
rolling 1d20+5
(
13
)
+5
=
18
Frezak (GM): Birrrrds
Of firrrre
Greibel should shout out his power names.
Every time he uses them.
Apheori (GM): Fire bird stuff happens! You melt a bit. It turns kind of black.
Frezak (GM): Black?
Cold plastic?
Bear Soup Guy: I imagine Greibel's eyes turn to fire briefly and fizzle out over time
nice
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20+12 Taste the melty stuff
(
15
)
+12
=
27
Apheori (GM): It tastes like burnt fish.
Gaurav: OH NO
Apheori (GM): Seawater, perhaps.
Gaurav: if you'd rolled a 1, would your tongue have frozen to the ice block?
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Ganelon: NOT THE FISH AGAIN
Greibel: Sea water with....well, a high concentration of fish.
Rhu: F..fish?
Not ... giant fish?
The Gravedigger: NEXT DOOR
NOTHING TO SEE HERE.
Rhu looks nervously up and down the corridor.
The Gravedigger: PUT THE BIRDS AWAY
Greibel: Giant fish don't taste much different from regular fish
The Gravedigger: That is valuable information and I will remember that, Greibel.
Amadi: I've got a sack of fish!
Apheori (GM): Do you move on to the next?
Gaurav: YES
Frezak (GM): Yup
Gaurav: Messing with even potentially giant fish is not worth it
Ganelon: Never again.
Bear Soup Guy: Plus we might get flooded by some hole to the ocean
Gaurav: Oooh, good point
Rhu closes the closet door.
Bear Soup Guy: Like in Journey To The Centre Of The Earth
Rhu: That would suggest that this simple closet door could hold back an ocean's worth of water, though.
Apheori (GM): You encounter another door!
The Gravedigger: Or a Hole at the bottom of an ocean.
Dave: We should turn around.
Rhu: Huh? Why? We are Discovering New Things!
Dave: The space. It isn't right.
Greibel: Yeah. We discovered a walk-in freezer.
Ganelon: Uh oh.
Amadi: It's okay. I know how to swim.
SWIMMMMING LIKE A SHARK!
Rhu: What's not right about the space?
The Gravedigger: I've yet to see anything 'right' since we got here.
Amadi: Sharks!
Everywhere!
Amadi flails.
Dave: Er...
Dave moves away from Amadi.
Apheori (GM): There are some things you just cannot put down in text very wel.
Like talking like GIR.
Rhu: GIR?
Gaurav: sorry: GIR?
Apheori (GM): A crazy robot.
Ganelon: I know who.
Your example was not totally lost.
Gaurav: Shall we open this new door?
We haven't gotten very far from the Terrible Lab, have we?
Apheori (GM): You're a bit away.
Let's just say you've passed some other doors that were completely uninteresting.
Like the one that opened into an empty lunchroom.
And a pile of offices with bones on the desks.
Ganelon: Well, I'll do an Arcana if that's alright.
To see if there's something wrong, magically, with the room ahead.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+11
(
3
)
+11
=
14
Seems okay to me!
Apheori (GM): Nothing odd.
Amadi opens the door and yells 'TUNA' at the top of her lungs.
Then she runs in and disappears.
To everyone else, it just looks dark.
Shine a light in.
Frezak (GM): Everywhere I look is illuminated.
Since I have torches strapped to my head.
Apheori (GM): Okay, so Gravy looks in!
It's full of beds and not very interesting.
There are some cabinets.
And some corpses in the beds.
Living quarters.
Gaurav: How many beds?
Apheori (GM): 18
Rhu looks through the cabinets
Greibel looks too
Apheori (GM): Personal items, random stuff, some money, some trinkets.
A dead rat.
Ganelon: Money!
Gaurav: are all the corpses in their beds?
Apheori (GM): Some are on the floor.
Gaurav: Right. Should we keep going?
Rhu: (to Dave) Is this space any better? In terms of ... spaciness?
Dave: It's going to cave in.
Rhu: o.0
That's not good.
Frezak (GM): TO THE TELEPORTERS
Ganelon: Grab the pocket change and flee!
Rhu: I don't like the transporters, but, that might be best. A cave-in would be a very bad thing indeed.
Dave: You scrounged up 47g, six rings, two necklaces, two boxes of pills, a dead rat, and a packet of seeds.
Apheori (GM): Sorry, ooc
You scrounged up 47g, six rings, two necklaces, two boxes of pills, a dead rat, and a packet of seeds.
Rhu: Nice!
Gaurav: Who wants to keep the loot? I've got way too much crap already or I would.
Frezak (GM): Rhu?
Since both my hands are full, when expecting trouble.
Ganelon: Radek carries a lot of junk already and his hands are also full during combat.
Gaurav: Okay. I got it.
So: run?
Frezak (GM): YEP
Ganelon: Solid plan.
Rhu takes off, helter-skelter, for the transporter room.
Frezak (GM): SIR ROBIN TIME
Let me go in front.
I can just plow through any skellies.
Because I am strong, like Bear.
Amadi: You all run for it, then?
Apheori (GM): Dammit.
You all run for it, then?
Gaurav: *exactly* like Bear
Apheori (GM): Sorry, not Amadi.
Frezak (GM): Well, /I/'m running.
Gaurav: You can go in front of me if you can catch up.
Frezak (GM): Dunno about YOU guys :P
Gaurav: Which, given our relative STR and CON, is likely
Frezak (GM): I have trouble cornering once I have speed :P
Gaurav: I _think_ it's a straight corridor :P
Frezak (GM): Aren't you elfy, though?
Ganelon: I tend to trust Gravy when it comes to fight/flight responses.
Frezak (GM): Don't you have a speed bonus?
Gaurav: If not, well, aim for the transporters and ignore the walls
Oh, right, you're _not_ elfy
Frezak (GM): No.
I'm Gravy.
-y
I'm SPECIAL
Apheori (GM): Well, you all run away. Amadi appears running with you singing 'Brave, Brave Sir Robin'.
Frezak (GM): THANKS
If we see a three-headed ogre, he's getting a taste of Gravy.
A generous portion.
Right tot he face.
*to the face
Gaurav: Any signs of impending collapse as we run?
Frezak (GM): Someone should have insighted her >.>
Apheori (GM): There are some horrible noises from back the way you came and it sounds like it did indeed cave in.
Frezak (GM): Oh, nice.
Gaurav: There was no time.
I'm all for having a discussion as to the cave-in-i-ness of this corridor, but in the transporter room where we can make a quick exit.
Speaking of quick exits ... I should get going to community ecology class.
Apheori (GM): Well, it all seems to be done as you pass the lab you spent the night in.
Gaurav: Which should be fun, given that the paper we had to read was horrible.
have*
keep going, and let me know how the cave-in ends!
Apheori (GM): Huh.
Bear Soup Guy: Adios Gaurav!
Ganelon: Well, unless I've left my things behind in this room, I've got no reason to stop.
Frezak (GM): We have mouseforged.
Keep on trukkin
Ganelon: My books, tools, and those blueprints are important to me too.
Gaurav: Or indeed tearing through the corridor at a furious pace
byeeeeeeeee
Apheori (GM): Amadi drags Dave into that room. Everyone else keeps running.
Ganelon: Yep.
Frezak (GM): Wait.
Mousie is on Dave's disk.
SORRY, MOUSIE
Apheori (GM): Oh, yeah, the disk follows her.
Frezak (GM): Welp.
It was nice having fun mocking Nature.
But I have holes to dig in the future.
Apheori (GM): So you get back to the teleport room. Everything is quiet again.
Everyone's sort of freaked out and breathing heavily, but all is calm...
Frezak (GM): FOR NOW
I play my Betrayal Card and become a Wyvern.
Apheori (GM): Funny.
Seriously, though, do stuff before I make Rhu start poking the controls randomly.
Ganelon: I'll tell Greibel about those locations that were trapped.
And everyone to use the thing single-file.
To prevent improper reassembly.
Apheori (GM): So you... what, try to send Gravy through first?
Frezak (GM): ehhhh.
It takes after me.
Being so mighty
Ganelon: Sure.
It worked out alright the first time.
Apheori (GM): Okay. Gravy goes and stands on the dias, you hit... which button
?
Ganelon: I forget what they are by number, but the numbered one that wasn't here or one of the two traps.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Ganelon: And therefore not "end" or whatever that last one said.
Apheori (GM): Out.
There's the usual light play, and then it makes a funny noise and dumps a bunch of silvery stuff on Gravy.
Radek: That's not good.
Frezak (GM): AAAAGH
NO NO NO
Apheori (GM): (It looks like what was coating Radek before.)
Frezak (GM): SET ME ON FIRE
GET IT OFFF
Apheori (GM): It mostly just slides off and winds up in a puddle.
You get the rest off too.
Frezak (GM): Whew.
HOLD THE FIRE
Radek: Is that...
The Gravedigger: It's Mr Gooples, yes.
Ganelon: Might I inspect the stuff to see if it is, in fact, the same as what was covering me?
The Gravedigger: The Silver Surfed.
Apheori (GM): It is.
But now it's puddly.
As opposed to coaty.
Frezak (GM): I DID TELL YOU.
Ganelon: I stand on the dais!
Radek: This substance is marvelous. Hit that button again!
Apheori (GM): I suppose Rhu hits the button.
Some more silvery stuff winds up falling on Radek and then the entire thing dies.
But it also slides off him.
Radek: ...Bah.
Frezak (GM): PUT IT IN A MUG
Ganelon: Last time I tried to collect some, it just vanished.
Apheori (GM): But this time it's a puddle.
Ganelon: Alright, I'll get some in the mug (which should be empty now).
Radek: This is troublesome. What's wrong with the teleporter?
Apheori (GM): It appears to be broken, as though all the energy is gone.
Greibel: Well, it's wet with silver stuff, for one thing.
Radek: It's... out of power, or not receiving it.
Greibel: Maybe...somebody's been here since the last time you were?
Frezak (GM): If only we had a friendly mouse to follow the power cables.....
Apheori (GM): Alas.
Ganelon: Oh sure, make me look like a jerk *now*.
Radek: We won't be able to use it like this.
Frezak (GM): Crud.
See if Greibel can remember how he got here?
Bear Soup Guy: He might have some vague recollection
But he did just mostly wander
Greibel: If we can find a room with a cat god shrine, I know the way back out from there.
Frezak (GM): Some kind of check?
TO... de-bong?
Bear Soup Guy shrugs
Frezak (GM): WHY DID YOU NOT LAY OUT STRING
Check the floor for a coke trail.
Apheori (GM): Sure, do a... uh...
Intelligence check.
Bear Soup Guy: righto
d20 plus modifier, right?
Apheori (GM): Right! I guess.
Ganelon: Yes, that's it.
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20+2 SMARTZ
(
13
)
+2
=
15
Ganelon: Those are some smartz there.
(You actually add your 1/2 level bonus to this too)
Frezak (GM): Given that he's drugged up to the eyeballs, yeah.
Bear Soup Guy: Yeah, that's after the half level bonus
I think
Apheori (GM): You passed a chicken.
Bear Soup Guy: That's what my card thing says
Apheori (GM): Also you came... from...
Was that what collapsed?
You dunno!
Frezak (GM): AWESOME.
Let's go see where it collapsed.
MAYBE WE CAN DIG THROUGH IT
Ganelon: Of course you'd be excited at that possibility.
Apheori (GM): Of course he is.
Ganelon: Well, I agree with going there to assess the damage.
And it'd be nice to see where those other people we abandoned are.
Bear Soup Guy: Right. Cave-in's probably over
Apheori (GM): Yeah, it's all quiet now.
The others ran into the lab on the way.
You haven't heard anything since.
What do you do?
Ganelon: Are they all just gone?
I thought we were passing through the lab to get here.
Frezak (GM): I can prolly track 'em if not.
The DCs to track on stone are high, but I have Gravysense.
Ganelon: Indeed.
Apheori (GM): You passed by the lab, not through.
Ganelon: Oh, okay.
Apheori (GM): They ran into it.
Ganelon: I wouldn't trust anyone with Amadi to not just vanish, though.
Apheori (GM): You'll not know until you look.
Or something.
Ganelon: Let's look.
This escape route is exhausted.
Frezak (GM): TO THE LAB
Apheori (GM): The lab!
It looks like how you left it. Nobody's there.
Go out the other side, or pass it to check out the cave in?
Frezak (GM): I want to track the ladies.
Hard ground DC is... 25.
rolling 1D20+10+9+1
(
20
)
+10+9+1
=
40
All is revealed.
Ganelon: If I had a god, I would blaspheme its name right now.
Apheori (GM): Yeah, they went out the other side. Also there are some bits of tuna.
Why?
Frezak (GM): I'll follow the tracks until I find ladies.
Ganelon: Because that roll is ridiculous!
Apheori (GM): You find more bits of tuna on the way.
Frezak (GM): Fresh tuna?
Apheori (GM): But the track leads you to a... presentation room of sorts.
Canned tuna bits.
Frezak (GM): Oh,t hat's all right then.
Apheori (GM): It's a circular room with seats around the center, where a hologram is currently flickering about. Amadi and Dave are fiddling with a console on the other side of it, but the sphinx is draped across half of it so it's hard to tell how they'd make any progress.
The mouseforged was apparently dumped across a few seats.
Did everyone else follow you?
Ganelon: I did.
When his eyes start glowing like searchlights I don't question it.
Frezak (GM): Lucky I didn't turn around and blind you.
"They went over here, guys-"
"AAAAAH MY EYES"
Ganelon: "Oh wow, you've got some real skin problems."
Frezak (GM): HAH
Apheori (GM): Guys. Do stuff.
Bear Soup Guy: I'll stroll over to Amadi and Dave and watch their console-hackery
Frezak (GM): What IS the hologram that is being projected?
You said it was flickery, but is there something we can see?
Dave: Amadi's just poking random buttons and Dave is half-heartedly trying to move the sphinx, but most of the attempts turn into ear scratching and whatnot.
Apheori (GM): Dammit.
Ganelon: Figures.
Apheori (GM): Amadi's just poking random buttons and Dave is half-heartedly trying to move the sphinx, but most of the attempts turn into ear scratching and whatnot.
Ganelon: I'll do some REAL science to this console.
Dave: Oh, hello.
Ganelon: And poke buttons... purposefully.
Dave: (to Greibel)
Radek: The teleporter is powerless. We can't use it to escape.
What's all this?
Greibel: I see you found one of Radek's friends
Apheori (GM): It's a figure of a man, dressed like some sort of wizard or scientist. He seems to be speaking, but there's no sound. It's flickering between segments.
Dave: Some sort of recording. I think...
Well, if somebody would stop messing with it, maybe we could hear what he said?
Dave gives Amadi a significant look.
Amadi: (poking random buttons) WHASSIS DO? WHASSIS DO?
Greibel: It's really the only way to learn
Greibel presses a few curiously
Dave picks up the sphinx and dumps it on Amadi's head.
Amadi: I'M BLINDED I'M BLINDED IT'S THE DARK!
Amadi runs around in circles, trips over a chair, and disappears, leaving the sphinx suddenly occupying the chair.
Frezak (GM): Gravy will just... stand, having nothing to contribute.
Watchfully check chairs for popcorn?
Radek: Right then.
Ganelon: NOW I will press buttons purposefully.
I don't suppose there's a volume knob, huh?
Amadi: It looks like it was just muted. You can also start it from the beginning.
Apheori (GM): AGH.
It looks like it was just muted. You can also start it from the beginning.
Ganelon: I do this gladly.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Dammit, the humidifier is grinding again.
Frezak (GM): Disgusting.
Stop giving it Viagra.
Apheori (GM): You start it from the beginning with sound.
The man in the recording just stands there for a bit, as though trying to figure out what to say...
Hologram: So this is it, then? The end? It wasn't supposed to end like this.
Never is.
Radek: I used to love watching my colleagues' tapes of this sort of thing.
Hologram: If you're hearing this, then we're all dead. Call the rescue off. You'll find nothing. At least... I hope you'll find nothing.
Frezak (GM): AWESOME
MOTIVATIONAL AS SHIT
Hologram: Consider your mission reassigned. This is no longer a rescue, but an extermination.
Frezak (GM): "it's the cats.
THe damned cats.
It was them, all along."
Hologram: Since we lost contact with the surface, things have only gotten worse.
The dead... have no stayed dead. The living have... disappeared? I'm not even sure.
I don't know when we lost contact, either. Time got funny, the walls got... funny.
But if you're here things will have calmed down. So don't worry too much about that.
Apheori (GM): He stops, thinking.
Frezak (GM): Sounds like Sarathi to me.
Radek: I don't think it had anything to do with the rifts.
Hologram: I don't think it had anything to do with the rifts.
Apheori (GM): DAMMIT.
This is awful!
Ganelon: Stealing control of my character! How could you!?
Apheori (GM): This interface is just awful!
I hate it!
Blame the terrible interface.
Seriously, I could probably write something better myself.
Ganelon: Well, I like that R20 exists.
Frezak (GM): I don't have problems with it.
Given the alternative, I'm not complaining.
Ganelon: Lets me play D&D with people who live like six timezones apart from me.
And without much hassle at that.
Bear Soup Guy: Except for the interface
Frezak (GM): You should have seen what I used to use.
Apheori (GM): Eh, it's good that it's there, but the interface for switching in and out of characters is no better than using an IRC client.
Frezak (GM): Ancient version of MapTools.
Just awful, it was.
Apheori (GM): Well, konversation, anyway. Actually it's exactly the same as konversation, now that I think about it.
Except konversation isn't a platform for handling multiple characters...
Apheori (GM) rants a bit.
Hologram: I don't know what it was.
Hologram shakes his head.
Hologram: We're supposed to know these things, right? Recording the final log, telling those who will come after exactly what went wrong?
Except everyone who knew is already dead. I'm already dead. We're all dead and there will be no answers.
Radek: You'd be surprised how often they don't.
Hologram: Dispose of the labs. clean up the experiments. Exterminate the dead, and close this place.
And don't tell my wife.
Apheori (GM): He walks out of the circle and the recording ends.
The Gravedigger: Not... super helpful.
Apheori (GM): There are other recordings, though. Earlier logs, different projects...
Dave: How helpful would you be?
Ganelon: If possible, I'd like to just take 'em with me.
Apheori (GM): Would you have anything with which to play them back?
Also it would have been a lot more helpful had I not been so depressed and actually written the whole thing ahead of time like I planned.
The Gravedigger: I'd say something about the experiments, or something helpful about HOW to exterminate stuff.
Apheori (GM): Being depressed sucks.
Ganelon: It does, by definition, suck.
Apheori (GM): Can I just add some things that were supposed to be mentioned and we all pretend they were? >.>
Ganelon: I have that portable computer that might be out of power.
And yes, I'm fine with that.
Frezak (GM): Absolutely, DM.
Apheori (GM): Okay, pretend he said something about getting back to Arah, and something about how the contagion spread but when the countermeasures were enacted that should have dissipated it, which is unfortunate, really, because otherwise it might have been possible to figure out what it was or where it came from...
And how the reason it wouldn't have been connected to the rift stuff was because those experiments never breached containment, and the subjects were all inert...
Frezak (GM): Now this is more helpful.
I TAKE IT MOSTLY BACK MR HOLOGRAM SIR
Apheori (GM): And also something about how if the other Orders wouldn't keep interfering this probably wouldn't have happened.
AND THAT I THINK IS IT.
Ganelon: Getting back, huh...
Frezak (GM): ooooh
Ganelon: So they were probably stranded like us?
Frezak (GM): More likely they came HERE to do science.
Bear Soup Guy: Seeing as the other cultures we've seen so far on this planet seem rather behind in terms of technology or awareness of it
Apheori (GM): They've got some artificer-type stuff.
Ganelon: ...I suppose that is more plausible, since they actually did know science.
Ooooh what kind?
Apheori (GM): Well, there was that guy who was going to give you that box of things...
And the machinery...
Ganelon: Oh, sorry, I misunderstood.
Yes, the guy I'm about to entrust with the knowledge of futuristic weapons technology for a tidy profit.
Apheori (GM): Aye.
Frezak (GM): Sounds plausible.
Apheori (GM): Hee.
Ganelon: Hey man, it's not *our* problem if he abuses it.
Frezak (GM): Okay, so.
Sounds like we need to rummage around here some more, then.
Find out science details.
Anda bout Orders.
Bookworm time.
And... paper-looting.
Apheori (GM): Rummage through the recordings?
Or around the... facility?
Ganelon: If I can't copy and play back the recordings on something more portable later, I'll do that right here and now.
Frezak (GM): Here first, since we're here.
Then i'll go stand watchfully in the hall, in case of zombles.
Ganelon: "Final recordings of failed scientists" are like home movies to Radek, though.
And he's an old person, so he loves them rather than finding them embarassing.
Apheori (GM): Snrk.
Well, most of the stuff seems to be actual presentations.
Findings, progress reports, proposals.
Ganelon: What were they working on?
Frezak (GM): psssst.
Greibel.
Asssk the porrrrridge
Apheori (GM): The main project was an investigation of what they decided to call 'rifts'. Apparently they'd been popping up across the planes, even outright destroying some of them, and it's only gotten worse as time went on.
Initially they sent teams to investigate the rifts directly, but the scientists were driven mad, their souls twisted beyond recognition.
So after that, they avoided getting close, and instead sent golems to collect samples and energy readings, to some success.
Bear Soup Guy: Is gravy telling Greibel to ask the porridge?
Frezak (GM): No, Frezak is :P
Bear Soup Guy: Oh okay, I thought so
Apheori (GM): They found several subjects that had apparently come out of more stable rifts, as well, and brought them back for further study - apparently the folks in the tanks.
Bear Soup Guy: Hell, he'll do it anyway =P
in a bit
Apheori (GM): Another project they were working on involved shielding based on an artifact they'd found.
Apparently it was a new way to create invisible boundaries that blocked energy rather than matter, meaning only low-energy things could pass through - low levels of light, slower and colder objects...
Radek: Fascinating.
Apheori (GM): Two other projects involved something with mutating birds and a thing about talking to the dead.
Ganelon: Evidently the former worked out pretty great.
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Ganelon: I don't suppose the "talking to the dead" project involved souls directly?
Apheori (GM): It's unclear.
The guy documenting it seems to be pretty... crazy.
Ganelon: Shame. I'll have to find something to do with this liquefied one.
Frezak (GM): That was probably Mr Super Helpful Guy in the warforged.
Apheori (GM): The bird one sounds like it might have had something to do with a contagion like the first hologram mentioned, though.
Ganelon: This is a lot of leads to follow, I must say.
I am pleased.
Gonna have to go back once we stop and take notes.
Frezak (GM): yay for being dumb!
Apheori (GM): Everything seems to be stored on crystals, so you can take those with you. You may or may not be able to transfer them to your own equipment, but it's worth a try.
Ganelon: I'm sure I can find some insane use for crystals even if that's not the case.
I'll take 'em.
Apheori (GM): Heh.
Greibel: Porridge?
Bear Soup Guy: Right!
Ganelon: There, a new addition to my inventory: "Data-storage crystals from the underground lab what with all the zombies and skellingtons."
Frezak (GM): You're learning!
That they're skellingtons, specifically.
Bear Soup Guy: So Greibel, uh...I dunno, makes a face at the porridge
The porridge makes the face back at Greibel.
Frezak (GM): AAAAAH
Ganelon: One of these days, man, that porridge is going to steal his actual face.
I'm calling it now.
Bear Soup Guy: :O
And he'll leave The Scream in its place
Frezak (GM): Oaty Horror show.
Apheori (GM): So what now?
Ganelon: I don't know. I mean, the plan ought to be to get the hell out of this place.
But we might save that for next session since this is a lot to recap already for Gaurav.
Apheori (GM): Especially since the walls are sometimes groaning.
Ayuh.
Ganelon: In-character, though, the plan is definitely to get the hell out.
Frezak (GM): Robin Time.
Apheori (GM): And nobody died!
Well done, everyone!
Bear Soup Guy: Rhu died inside
Nobody gets geese dropped on them and stays the same
Apheori (GM): Alack.
Ganelon: S'true.
You never forget the honking. Not till the end of your days.
Bear Soup Guy: And at the very end you take solace in the blessed silence
Frezak (GM): The Honking.
Stephen King.
Bear Soup Guy: Pulitzer Prize winner
Okay, if we're wrapped up for the day I'm gonna head off for a shower
Apheori (GM): Alright yes good we'll meet next time.
Bear Soup Guy: Right-o
Apheori (GM) runs off after tuna.
Bear Soup Guy: Good game everyone!
Ganelon: This was a good session.
See you guys next week.
Bear Soup Guy: Adios
Apheori (GM): Yaaaay.
TUUUUUNA!
Frezak (GM): Gravy still feels unfulfilled.
His hole is one that'll never be filled.
Not matter how much he shovels.
You people leave so quickly O.o
TUNAMAN
Bear Soup Guy: I AM THE ONE WHO IS SPREAD ON TOAST IN THE NIGHT
Gaurav: Spreading himself on toast so you don't have to.
Bear Soup Guy: Very accommodating

Session 16

Apheori (GM): Does anyone remember the current situation?
Bear Soup Guy: We're uh
Frezak (GM): THe place started falling apart then stopped.
We were looting.
Ganelon: We read through some logs.
The teleporter was broken.
Apheori (GM): Right. You were in that presentation room, the walls were sometimes groaning...
Gaurav: Yay groaning walls
we haven't had that in a while
Apheori (GM): Well, this is structural groaning, not possessed groaning.
Gaurav: oh
non-sarcastic "yay!" then
Frezak (GM): We need to find out how Greibel got here.
By... killing him and casting Speak With Dead, possibly.
Apheori (GM): Greibel got in down the corridor that collapsed.
Frezak (GM): UNless Ghost-Greibel is also stoned.
Apheori (GM): Of course ghost-Greibel is also stoned.
Frezak (GM): Well, bugger.
Bear Soup Guy: Always stoned
Frezak (GM): Wander around aimlessly...
Bear Soup Guy: He's a floating pot-smoke apparition
Frezak (GM): OR.
I COULD DIG US OUT.
Gaurav: Can you smoke ghost-Griebel?
like, if you were to inhale him
Apheori (GM): You could track your way out.
Frezak (GM): Ghost Greibel inhales YOU.
Track?
Apheori (GM): Or you could get Radek to look for a map of the place.
Folks used this place, went in and out. Track it!
Frezak (GM): Ehhhh
Ganelon: Have Greibel turn into a swarm of moles!
Frezak (GM): There you go.
Bear Soup Guy: :O
Frezak (GM): Thanks, Brains.
Do that.
Gaurav: ++swarm of moles idea
Apheori (GM): You could follow the tuna trails that criss-crossed the real trail you followed to find the crazies.
Gaurav: why would the transporter stop working? we didn't fiddle with any electronics while we were here, right?
Apheori (GM): Why, indeed...
Gaurav: ... or the tune trail. that works too.
Ganelon: It wasn't getting power.
Well, that doesn't explain why it dumped silvery stuff on us.
But now it's not getting power.
Most likely suspect is, of course, the cave-in.
Gaurav: oh right, that would explain it
the tanks are also empty
the presentation room has power
Ganelon: Good point.
Rhu: "speaking with the dead": well, that thing is from the City of the Dead ... *points at sphinx*
Pretty easy to speak to the dead if you can teleport there.
The sphinx licks itself emphatically.
Radek: Useless if you can't find a specific soul, however.
Apheori (GM): Greibel could turn into a swarm of slime and map the complex like a slime mold.
Ganelon: I'll oblige you and go look for a map.
But I would prefer if Greibel turned into a swarm of soft memory foam.
Gaurav: Sorry if this was covered earlier: is the presentation room the only place you can get to through the north corridor, or are there other places to explore there?
Apheori (GM): You check by the door and are disappointed to find that this building apparently does not follow normal codes and has no directions to emergency exits.
There are other places. Gravy just tracked the two loon here.
loons
Ganelon: Oh, I would register SO MANY complaints if there were anyone to receive them.
Gaurav: Ha! I hope we find a complaint register at some point. This place seems crazy enough that it might have one.
Ganelon: "And then there was a cave-in, and when we tried to use the teleporter it just produced liquid non-existence, which didn't even stick to me!"
Bear Soup Guy: "I'm VERY dis-satisfied!"
Dave: (counting the seats in the room) Two... fourteen... twenty three...
Ganelon: I'd probably slip in a few complaints about the party itself even though that is in no way this establishment's fault.
Dave: Something's missing.
Gaurav: Possibly silly question, but we've already echecked that our communication gear doesn't work down here, right?
Radek: What?
Rhu: (to Dave) What?
rolling 1d20+12 perception check on the room to see if I can see what's caught Dave's attention
(
6
)
+12
=
18
Frezak (GM): BAH.
Gravy will activate his Gravysenses.
rolling 1D20+20
(
3
)
+20
=
23
See?
Even on a 3 i'm awesome.
Now I need to sit down for 5 minutes >.>
Rhu: Thank you.
Ganelon: Keep showing off like that and I'll have to one-up you in a different campaign altogether.
Dave: I don't know.
Ganelon: By making Freya's L6 feat Skill Focus: Diplomacy.
Apheori (GM): Frezak: It has something to do with the number of seats and the... door?
Frezak (GM): Uh.
I will relay that dubious information >.>
Gaurav: How many seats are there? 23?
Frezak (GM): Is there a missing seat spot?
Gaurav: There were 18 beds in the quarters earlier, but we've definitely seen more than 18 skeletons, so there must be more living quarters around somewhere.
Apheori (GM): 47 seats.
Ganelon: I don't get why this is important, but...
I suppose I'll check out the door.
Gaurav: There were 47 gold pieces in the living quarters, although that couldn't posibly be relevent.
Apheori (GM): The walls creak ominously as you do. Perception, please.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+12 perception check
(
14
)
+12
=
26
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+10
(
7
)
+10
=
17
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+8
(
17
)
+8
=
25
Apheori (GM): I meant Radek.
Ganelon: I think it's 8, at least.
I'll confirm in just a sec.
Gaurav: all perception all the time
Ganelon: Yep, 8.
Apheori (GM): GAN: YOU NOTICE...
...that none of the rooms are labelled and in a place like this, they should be labelled. It's like someone stole all the signs.
Frezak (GM): SCRUB
SCRUB ALL THE WALLS
Radek: Are you talking about a sign for the room, Dave?
There should be one here.
Dave: One? Or two?
Ellemerr: I should be ready very soon. Am I present?
Dave: On the door, and by the door.
Apheori (GM): You are not, so show up when you feel like.
Rhu: By the door?
Apheori (GM): Elll: There is a sphinx draped over some seats licking itself, if that helps.
Ellemerr: Perhaps.
(From Ellemerr): If you've anything specific you want me to confuse those poor buggers about, as always, you've but to tell me.
Apheori (GM): Dave walks over to the door and taps slightly to the right of the frame, 2/3 of the way up.
Dave: Here.
(To Ellemerr): Igot nothing.
Frezak (GM): DETECT ILLLLUUUSION
Ganelon: ...Sure, why not.
Frezak (GM): I smack the tapped area.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+11 Arcana
(
13
)
+11
=
24
There any magic up there, boss?
(To Ellemerr): I think some crazy person just stole all the signs.
Rhu: We're inside the room. Why would there be a sign on the way out?
Apheori (GM): Magic!
Greibel: They want to make sure you enjoyed your stay.
Apheori (GM): Something magical touched it.
Frezak (GM): I PUNCH THE MAGIC
Apheori (GM): The magic disperses.
Ganelon: Way to go, you scared the magic away.
Now we can't disenchant it for MORE DUST
Gaurav: That magic has returned to the land of its forefathers.
Frezak (GM): My shovel is magic?
and brb
Apheori (GM): Isn't it a +1 shovel?
Frezak (GM): No.
Apheori (GM): Oh.
Greibel: +1 Shovel Of Burrying
Frezak (GM): None of us have any magic stuff.
Bear Soup Guy: err
Ganelon: I have the ability to make one thing +1.
Bear Soup Guy: OOC
Ganelon: With my current resources.
Apheori (GM): I thought it was almost all +1 since you're from future land.
The porridge hops around the room merrily
Apheori (GM): Or maybe that was just the cloth stuff.
The sphinx gets up and stalks the porridge.
Gaurav: My cloth armour is +1, but it's not magical. Just cloth.
Was there anything hiding under the sphinx?
Apheori (GM): Some cat hair.
Amadi sits down in the seat vacated by the sphinx. Her hair is sticky with blood.
Ganelon: Well, the lack of signs is mysterious but we're in danger of the place collapsing and I don't see how a label would help us much.
Unless this room has a purpose we're unaware of.
Rhu backs away from blood-stained Amadi
Apheori (GM): Is Greibel smoking anything?
Rhu: (to Dave) why do you think there ought to be a sign there? Is it something about the room? Or have you been here before?
Ganelon: It's the morning. Of course he is.
Bear Soup Guy: :D
Ellemerr: Is not smoking an option for him?
Ganelon: (I think he actually did mention something of the sort)
Dave: Max occupancy 47 persons
Bear Soup Guy: Yeah, he did wake up and smoke a lot of things when he say Dave and Amadi on the ceiling
Dave: The space is there where it should be.
Bear Soup Guy: saw*
Gaurav: I imagine we'd stop him if he tried to smoke near something inflamable, but apart from that ...
Apheori (GM): Is he still smoking?
Okay.
Bear Soup Guy: Yeah, he could be if that would be helpful =D
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Gravy: You think you hear a squawk from a room down the corridor.
Bear Soup Guy: He's out of his element here and doesn't know what any of this science stuff does, so he's probably a bit bored and smoking quite a bit
Apheori (GM): Maybe others do too.
I dunno what your passive perceptions are.
Bear Soup Guy: passive 20
Ganelon: 18 here. Pretty good.
Gaurav: 22, but I think Rhu is still trying to work out the Mystery of the 47 Chairs, so he's distracted
Ganelon: Passive perception is just 10+perception mod, after all.
Apheori (GM): Greibel hears it too, and it sounds like a dying horse to him.
Rhu hears it and doesn't really notice.
Greibel perks up
Ganelon: Everyone here has ridiculous senses.
Apheori (GM): You're elves. Of course you do.
Ganelon: You should see the other game, where the gnoll (they get a racial bonus and everything) is the highest at 5.
Gaurav: I would have ridiculous senses, if Gravy didn't keep showing off.
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Apheori (GM): Wow.
Ganelon: 5! He misses stuff all the time!
Bear Soup Guy: Fits the scenario quite well though
If our highest perception was 5 we'd still be walking around a parking lot looking at cars
Frezak (GM): back
Ganelon: He's a really shitty hunter. Nobody believes him though because he kept rolling over 15 the one time we had to track something.
Apheori (GM): Or you'd be dead.
Bear Soup Guy: Yes
Apheori (GM): Frezak: You heard a squawk down the hall.
Do stuff.
Ellemerr: Hey, I believe you! You've convinced me that you're a really shitty liar, and I believe in luck.
Bear Soup Guy: And I a horse
Apheori (GM): Also Amadi is all bloody.
Bear Soup Guy: NATURE BROTHERS ASSEMBLE
Ellemerr: Eh, just her hair.
Frezak (GM): What kind of squawk?
Apheori (GM): How is your nature?
Gaurav: A giant seabird has arrived. The giant fish are on their way.
Apheori (GM): Roll nature.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+9
(
16
)
+9
=
25
Ganelon: The pelicans have come!
Frezak (GM): THE GULLS
Gaurav: We must send BSG to negotiate on our behalf. And try to stop the sphinx from eating it.
Apheori (GM): It sounds like an angry duck and then like a horse dying.
Frezak (GM): OH, GODS, THE GULLS
I realy that terrifying information to the party.
*relay
AND CHARGE INTO THE HALL
Apheori (GM): And ignore the bloody Amadi?
Greibel wonders what animal might be amicable to both a duck and a horse
Frezak (GM): I'm not a healer.
I dig graves, I don't keep people out of them.
Apheori (GM): You don't need to be a healer to notice something is odd.
Bear Soup Guy: Oh, is it Amadi's own blood?
Amadi dangles her feet, smiling at the world at large.
Apheori (GM): On the other hand, Amadi is always add.
odd
Gaurav: I was a healer until I killed someone. Now I'm a lapsed healer. Plus, it's Amadi. She'll pop into another world and then pop back, good as new.
Frezak (GM): EVERYTHING IS ODD.
Ganelon: ADD also works.
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Frezak (GM): So i charge into the halll.
Gaurav: Frezak: don't jinx it. Things have been surprisingly unodd for a while now.
Ganelon: I think I would prefer not to know why there's blood in her hair, myself.
Frezak (GM): THis world has taught me that being sensible in it is pointless.
Rhu goes out after Frezak, maul drawn.
Dave frowns at Amadi and then follows Gravy.
Ganelon: So I'll just follow these guys.
Bear Soup Guy: Perhaps the blood is from whatever animal is squawking right now
Apheori (GM): At a sedate walk, though.
Frezak (GM): Was she birthed again?
OUt of a duckmoose?
Gaurav: She spent more than six minutes with the sphinx. That'll bloody anyone.
Apheori (GM): Folks in the hall: You now hear a horrible horking noise from the room you just left.
Frezak (GM): I don't want to know.
She's just spitting up an Amadiball.
Rhu pops his head back into the room in surprise
Frezak (GM): From licking too many ears;
Apheori (GM): Amadi, Greibel: The sphinx ran into the porridge.
Frezak (GM): I warned you.
Greibel: Oik!
Ellemerr: Uh-oh
Greibel goes over to try to separate them
Rhu shakes his head and return to the corridor
Apheori (GM): They're a bit tangled.
Greibel: Roll to untangle.
Amadi skips down to join with the seperating.
Apheori (GM): Probably dexterity.
Greibel: mmm
Apheori (GM): With an assist from Amadi.
Greibel:
rolling 1d20+0
(
2
)
+0
=
2
XD XD XD
Ellemerr:
rolling 1d20
(
20
)
=
20
Ganelon: Amazing.
Bear Soup Guy: Utterly amazing
Gaurav: well that's a pair of rolls
Frezak (GM): Gorram.
Ellemerr: Even I can roll good once in a while, you know. Just... never in combat.
Frezak (GM): So... With that crit.... Greibel got..4.
Ellemerr: Yes, I'm spending all my good rolls here, Frezak. Deal with it.
Frezak (GM): THANKS, AMADI
WAY TO GO.
THIS IS WHY THE STRANGER DIED.
Apheori (GM): Amadi peels the porridge off the sphinx and it winds up on Greibel's head.
The horrible noises cease.
Amadi giggles.
Ganelon: Just ask the Merr to Astral Seal something and you'll see how consistent she can be. For the worse.
Apheori (GM): The sphinx runs out into the corridor as well.
Greibel chuckles a bit as well
Gaurav: darnit, should've locked it in here when we had the chance
Ellemerr: I'd help, but I think I've sort of made it terrified of me, at least for a while.
Frezak (GM): So.....
I'm all alone?
Gaurav: no, I'm still in the corridor
Frezak (GM): But you stopped running, right?
Gaurav: Yes. I'm right outside the door at the moment. Did you run ahead?
Ganelon: I followed you without interruption.
Frezak (GM): I never turned back.
Ganelon: I don't want to be alone with all the crazy people.
Frezak (GM): On the basis that Amadi can control spacetime.
Greibel: (to Amadi) Well, not to point out the obvious but...how'd you get all bloodied up?
Apheori (GM): Dave's still walking after Gravy and Radek.
Frezak (GM): ANd there was a duck in danger.
Ganelon: Or a dangerous duck.
Gaurav: An angry duck. A dead horse.
Ganelon: I think it might be that.
Frezak (GM): Zombie duck?
Amadi: How did I what?
The porridge: Gloop
Greibel: Mmm. Right.
Rhu cautiously advances down the corridor in the direction that Gravy went
Frezak (GM): No need to be cautious.
Apheori (GM): The sphinx catches up with Gravy at some point.
Amadi looks at Greibel as though he's a little bit mad.
Frezak (GM): If there's something bad, it's gonna be busy with a faceful of Gravy
Apheori (GM): Gravy: You come to a room.
Frezak (GM): MY DREAD NEMESIS
Apheori (GM): The noise came from here. It is all quiet now.
The Gravedigger: HELLO?
Ganelon: It's okay, I have a rifle. We can totally make this a duck hunt.
Apheori (GM): Nothing.
The Gravedigger: IS THERE A DUCK AND OR HORSE IN HERE?
Apheori (GM): The sphinx runs in.
Gaurav: But it's rabbit season.
Frezak (GM): What IS in the room?
Radek is a scienceman.
Gaurav: Have I reached Frezak yet? How far ahead of us is he?
Frezak (GM): He can make a duck into a rabbit.
Apheori (GM): A desk, some chairs, a deformed skeleton...
And, apparently, a giant duckmoose monster under the desk. It appears to be either dead or unconscious.
Frezak (GM): DEFORMED?
I check the duckmoose for vital signs.
Apheori (GM): It has too many feet.
You wind up with sphinx vital signs.
Frezak (GM): I attempt to remove the sphinx.
The sphinx stares at Gravy from on top of the duckmoose.
Apheori (GM): You reach out to move the sphinx and it jumps off.
Ganelon: Cats.
Apheori (GM): Rhu, Radek: You come in as well.
Rhu: ... yeah ... okay ... I don't know what I was expecting.
But that's not far off.
Frezak (GM): Is this apex of nature alive?
Apheori (GM): Apparently not.
Amadi shrugs and pets the porridge.
The porridge rumbles.
Amadi: What time is it?
The Gravedigger: Can we leave yet?
Greibel: Uhrm
Gaurav: Time to get a new watch.
Radek: Time to leave, yes.
The Gravedigger: PLease.
Dave: Okay.
Rhu: We should get Griebel to check the creature out maybe. With the nature and whatnot.
Bear Soup Guy: Should I and/or Amadi head to the room?
We're still screwing around in the unimportant room
Frezak (GM): I can totes nature it.
rolling 1D20+9
(
17
)
+9
=
26
Ganelon: Don't suppose there's a map in this room either?
Frezak (GM): See? That's nature, right there.
That moose?
not natural.
Rhu: So: head of a duck, body of a moose?
That's large, scary and awkward, all at once.
Apheori (GM): Nature determines that it's not natural.
Amadi: Thanks, that's helpful. Hey, do you like my hair? I think I dyed it. Is it dyed? Do you have a mirror?
Apheori (GM): Some sort of horrible disease happened to it.
The Gravedigger: The duck-moose hybrid.... Is not natural.
Greibel: Your hair is...very unique. It's nice.
Amadi: Thanks!
Greibel: I don't have a mirror but uh....I'm sure there's a reflective surface around here somewhere...
Amadi: Right! The sign at the door. That's very clever of you.
Radek: It might have been a test subject.
Amadi goes to look at herself in the metallic sheen of the sign on the door.
The Gravedigger: Maybe.
I hope I don't turn into a duck.
Greibel: The sign on...was that there before?
Greibel walks over to read the sign
Rhu: I hope you don't turn into a duck either. So: definitely dead? We should go back and try to find another way out of here?
The Gravedigger: Yeah.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: Roll sanity.
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
8
)
=
8
Dave: Would you turn into a duck? Does that even happen?
Radek: I wouldn't discount anything.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: The sign looks like a map.
But it shimmers too much to make out details.
The Gravedigger: I dunno.
But this moose got ducked.
I don't want to be ducked.
Amadi: Huh. I could've sworn I used green dye...
The Gravedigger: Are you colourblind?
My brother has that.
Green bunnies.
Bear Soup Guy: Can I take the map off the door?
The Gravedigger: Not that HE ever saw a real bunny.
Because you only find them in zoos back home.
Apheori (GM): You try to take the map, but your fingers pass right through it.
Greibel: Oh, bugger all
Gaurav: The annual bunny migration was a terrible time back in Roseberry
Greibel: (To Amadi) What does this say?
(From Ellemerr): What do I tell him?
The Gravedigger: If you'd shown him this thing, he wouldn't have known it wasn't a proper creature.
Ganelon: We probably ought to be more concerned with the fact that this duckmoose was making noise seconds ago.
(To Amadi): It's the evacuation routes. Make something up.
Frezak (GM): I don't know what to be concerned about anymore.
Ganelon: Let's just move on. Do your tracking thing and see if we can't find an exit.
I mean, I liked my moles idea, but the druid's occupied.
Frezak (GM): Tracking would tell me where feet went, but not which ones went to an exit.
It's not magic.
Gaurav: Dungeoneering check to see if, I dunno, the floor is sloping up or something?
And we should go get Greibel back before we move on.
Amadi looks away from her own reflection in the metal, then back at it. "Hm? Oh, it's rules for running. Or guides. Most rules are just guides anyway. Do you think most guides are rules? It's very accurate. That way is blocked as of quite recently." She taps a spot on the thingy.
Gaurav: I'll go.
Rhu heads back to the hologram room, looking for Greibel.
Frezak (GM): Just pick a corridor and take the right-hand turn rule until we find an exit?
Rhu: (to Gravy, as he walks away) I like this plan!
Frezak (GM): I'd be a minotaur if I wasn't an elf!
Off to the holoroom.
Greibel: So where are we on this guide?
Rhu pops my head into the holoroom
Amadi points again.
Ganelon: Sure thing.
Rhu: (to Greibel) It was just a monster. We're going to try to use the right hand rule to get us out of here. Coming?
Dave: How do you know it isn't a proper creature?
Greibel: Hold on, we found a map, check it out
The Gravedigger: Well there goes my plan.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You see no map.
Frezak (GM): It's a stonermap.
Gaurav: Do I even see the sign?
Apheori (GM): Nope.
Rhu: That's a blank bit of wall. Don't worry about maps; if there was one, Radek would have found it ages ago.
Where we're going, we don't need maps!
Bear Soup Guy: Nice!
Greibel: Well, look. We can see it and nothing bad ever came of following a map that isn't there for everyone, right?
Apheori (GM): Radek: You notice a mass of fluff nuzzling you.
Radek: ...Wrong, but continue.
Apheori (GM): It says, "Hungry."
Ganelon: Is it the sphinx?
Rhu: (to Dave) Because why would a moose need a duck's head? How could a duck possibly eat enough in a day to sustain a body like that? Why even go to all the trouble of getting an aerodynamic head like a duck's if you're going to stick it on a moose, which is the exact opposite of whatever an aerodynamic thing is?
It doesn't make sense.
The Gravedigger: Because the duckhead on it was from some kind of magic disease.
Dave: Why not?
What if the head and body belong to it?
The Gravedigger: Its a moose with a duck's head.
Not a duck-headed moose-like creature.
But it doesn't.
Ganelon: No really, what is this nuzzling fluff?
Dave: The disease did it?
The Gravedigger: It probably died from having the wrong kind of head.
Yes.
Apheori (GM): Yeah, sphinx, sorry.
Ganelon: Alright, just making sure it's not something *new*.
Frezak (GM): Get the party together!
WE CAN SOLVE THIS
Rhu: The disease might have done it. That's true.
Frezak (GM): The getting out of here, specifically.
Rhu: Huh, solve _this_. We still haven't solved the mystery of the 47 chairs.
Frezak (GM): duckmooses can be solved later.
Rhu: Getting out of here would be nice, though. I miss the sun.
The Gravedigger: Let's go get RAdek and Co. and get out of here.
Tis place is falling apart.
Radek: Damnable creature! Do I look like an entertainer to you?
The sphinx: Hungry.
Rhu: Someone should probably tell the sphinx a story before it goes nuts again.
Agreed. Let's go!
The Gravedigger picks up Radek.
The Gravedigger: ONWARDS
Radek: I have no time to tell stories!
Ganelon: I'm okay with this.
Apheori (GM) picks up the sphinx.
Dave picks up the sphinx.
Apheori (GM): >.<
Ganelon: Radek is probably less so, but still.
Amadi: We're leaving? Follow the... huh. Does that look like a rabbit to you?
Amadi points to something on the sign.
Rhu: Does what look like a rabbit?
... the wall?
Greibel: hmmmm
Could be. How strange.
Rhu: There is a bit of a stain over on that side that looks a bit like a cat
Apheori (GM): The floating disk hits Greibel on the way out the door and stops.
Amadi: Mmm, I don't think we should follow the sphinx...
The Gravedigger: Right hand rule!
Less talky, more walky rightwards!
Come on, people!
Out the deathtrap!
Rhu follows Gravy
Apheori (GM): You've left the mouseforged in the room.
Just so you know.
Rhu: D'oh.
Greibel falls
Frezak (GM): Gorram.
Rhu mentions the mouseforged to Gravy -- he's not going back for it if Gravy doesn't want to.
Frezak (GM): I'll go put Mousie on the disj.
*disk
Apheori (GM): Greibel is now sitting on the disk where the mouseforged was supposed to be.
Frezak (GM): It's gone?
Apheori (GM): It fell on some of the seats.
Frezak (GM): Oh.
Well, i'll put down Radek, Pick up Greibel, pud Griebel down, pick up Mousie and put Mousie on the disk.
Whew.
Greibel sits on the floor vacantly
Gaurav: Put down Radek? Where is he?
Apheori (GM): Does everyone leave?
Now?
Frezak (GM): I picked him up.
Gaurav: Rhu sticks with Gravy.
Frezak (GM): Thanks, Rhu.
Ganelon: Well I'm not going back just to shout at the cat some more.
So yeah, I'll just follow.
Ellemerr: I'll sit with Greibel and sing komba-ya.
Frezak (GM): On the floor?
Once I put Mousie on the disk, I pick up Griebel and Amadi.
And get moving.
Greibel: oof
Amadi: Wheeee~
Apheori (GM): Okay, you head out!
Gaurav: YAY!
Greibel: (to Amadi) So I guess we're not following the map
Apheori (GM): Which way do you go? What do you do when Dave turns in a seemingly random direction?
Frezak (GM): Personally?
I'd ignore her.
Ganelon: We have a plan.
Gaurav: Wait, how many directions are there? I was imagining one corridor with the holoroom as a door on a side?
Ganelon: For once I'd like to stick to it.
Apheori (GM): I don't know.
Rhu: We might want to follow Dave, though. She might know something about this place, from her time in the tank.
Frezak (GM): She's also batshit.
Amadi: She's full of holes! Maybe we'll fall down and find the white rabbit!
Greibel: Rabbits are nice!
Rhu makes as if to reply to Gravy, stops, thinks, then shrugs
Rhu: Rabbits eat everything. They're pests.
Greibel: But they're so cute and fuzzy!
Frezak (GM): No, that was Frezak that said she was batshit.
Gravy would never say that.
Gaurav: Oh, right! Sorry. My bad.
Apheori (GM): So if you all ignore it, Dave will turn around and follow everyone else.
What's your plan, again?
Frezak (GM): Keep turning right until we find an exit.
Apheori (GM): o_O
Frezak (GM): Classic dungeon rule.
Gaurav: Or monsters.
Apheori (GM): You wind up going in a circle.
Frezak (GM): Then we go and do the same with the other wall.
Apheori (GM): The other wall?
Frezak (GM): Map.
If we went in a circle, then we were following the inner square.
So we find a corridor.
And use the other wall as our direction wall.
And do it again.
Apheori (GM): You get hopelessly lost.
Frezak (GM): WHAT
HOW CAN WE GET LOST.
I give up.
Apheori (GM): It's laid out like a floor of an office building.
Frezak (GM): Someone else do this.
Apheori (GM): Going around the outsides, you find no exits.
Aside from maybe something down rubble lane.
Gaurav: So we spot nothing else in our lost wanderings? And now we can't find our way back to the lab room?
Apheori (GM): Yup!
Well, nothing useful. Because I can't think of anything.
Lots of bodies.
Wait, no, you do come across something.
You're lost and you encounter a room with a... moose!
...jus kidding.
Apheori (GM): Not a moose, but a spherical thing on a table with a bunch of tubes attached to it.
Gaurav: "laid out like ... an office building" -- do you mean something like this: http://touristinmyownland.files.wordpress.com/2014/02/fort-canning-bunker.png
Rhu: I think we should head back to the holoroom.
Greibel: Not gonna say I told you so but....I told you so.
Ganelon: I'll inspect this spherical thing.
Amadi: Go back? What for?
Ganelon: Sounds like magic to me.
Amadi: Did someone forget their hairdye?
Amadi has now a hair full of dried blood. It smells... not particularly nice.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+11 Arcana
(
6
)
+11
=
17
Apheori (GM): It's laid out like a floor in a tall building, I mean.
Gan: It is magic! Apparently it's the shielding artifact.
You think.
You're not sure.
Greibel: (To Amadi) Your hair is really quite lovely today.
Bear Soup Guy: I'm imagining that Gravy still has each of us slung across his shoulders
Rhu notices that Amadi's hair has been getting progressively bloodier
Amadi: Aw, that's really sweet of you! I did it myself, you know.
Dave: I think you should ask Amadi how to get out. She got in.
I... think?
Frezak (GM): under each arm.
Like pigs.
Dave winces for some reason.
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Amadi: I was inside. I'm outside now.
Rhu: (to Amadi) Are you bleeding? Hey, Radek, I think she's bleeding.
Apheori (GM): Just tell her there's a bath on the other side.
Amadi: Am I bleeding? I don't think I'm bleeding.
Frezak (GM): Do I smell blood?
Ganelon: I'll groan and have a look.
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Ganelon: What'll that be, heal or perception?
The Gravedigger: Yeah, that's blood.
Apheori (GM): Heal, probably.
(To Amadi): What actually did happen? >.>
Frezak (GM): Can't you just syringe her?
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+8
(
15
)
+8
=
23
Gaurav: Gonna make some sandwiches, so if I'm slow to reply, you know why.
Ganelon: Sure, but if it's not coming from a wound, what good would that do?
(From Amadi): You're asking me? She dyed her hair! While in... the other place.
Frezak (GM): MAGIC
Apheori (GM): Well, you determine that it's not from a wound.
That's what good it does..
Gaurav: "Radek begins examining Amadi's head for injury. Amadi's hair comes to life and kills him. The end."
The Gravedigger: Eh, she's not complaining.
Ganelon: I mean a healing thing.
Apheori (GM): Heal is also to check, no?
Ganelon: Yes
I don't roll heal checks to use my infusions.
Gaurav: Yeah, we agreed that Heal would be for anything medical.
Ganelon: They just work.
Apheori (GM): You check out her head. It's fine. Her hair just happens to be covered in blood for some reason.
Like she tried washing it with blood.
Radek: She's completely healthy. Er, physically healthy.
And I'm not getting into the other sort. Now, stop asking.
Ganelon: Shielding thing. How big is it? And how secure?
Rhu: (to Amadi) Where'd all that blood come from? Or ... where IS it coming from?
Frezak (GM): I CAN DESECURE IT
Amadi: Dude, you're talking crazy. There's no blood.
Apheori (GM): It's got wires and tubes all over it, and it's a bit smaller than a basketball.
You can desecure it.
Amadi: Oh my side, are you seeing things like those kids in horror-movies? Is it oozing out of the walls? Don't touch the mirrors!
Dave walks over to a mirror and touches it.
Ganelon: Do so.
Apheori (GM): You desecure it?
Rhu: It's not oozing, it's just ... appearing in your hair. It's a little weird.
Radek: Detach this thing. We're taking it with us.
Frezak (GM): Not until teh smart guy demands my might.
I DETACH IT
With my consistently epic Str >.>
Ganelon: It is possible that we may all die, but I doubt that.
Amadi: ... Yeah, you're crazy.
Dave looks back at Amadi quizzically, and then notices how ridiculous she, Greibel, and Gravy look and bursts out laughing.
Frezak (GM): I will carefully put down my charges.
ANd prepare to desecure the thingy.
Rhu mutters something under his breath and turns around to the mirrors.
Greibel oinks at Gravy
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+12 perception check to examine the mirrors
(
20
)
+12
=
32
Apheori (GM): How do you want to do so?
Frezak (GM): I have no idea.
Bear Soup Guy: YOU ARE THE MIRROR
Apheori (GM): Rhu: Normal mirrors over a sink and crap.
Ganelon: Get the tubes off of it.
Apheori (GM): There are some smudges on one.
Rhu wipes at the smudges
Frezak (GM): I slice the tubes with my razor-edged shovel.
Ganelon: It would help to know how they're attached.
Apheori (GM): They only sort of wipe away, and mostly just become smudgier.
Gaurav: Like all smudges everywhere, then.
Apheori (GM): The tubes deflate sadly.
With a sad hiss.
It's very sad.
Frezak (GM): Have at thee, tubes!
Gaurav: :( poor tubes
Apheori (GM): It's still stuck in its stand. Whatdo you do?
Frezak (GM): I HEAVE.
Apheori (GM): ROLL SANITY
Frezak (GM): 1
Apheori (GM): ...I mean strength.
Frezak (GM): WHEW
Gaurav: That was the sanity check
Ganelon: "Nyeehhh"
Frezak (GM): IM GLAD I DID NOT ROLL SANITY.
Gaurav: Now roll the strength check
Apheori (GM): Okay, if your strength does bad things...
Frezak (GM): Whoa, no.
that's not Str.
Apheori (GM): You may have a problem.
Gaurav: Don't break the mirror, it's bad luck!
Apheori (GM): Roll strength.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+5
(
20
)
+5
=
25
MY MIGHT UNLEASHED
Gaurav: YES
Apheori (GM): You heave the artifact out of its stand.
Ganelon: BY THE POWER OF GRAVYSKULL
Gaurav: Frezak's muscles unexpectedly bulge out of his shirt, tearing it to pieces.
Bear Soup Guy: "and the bit of floor underneath it yanks out as well"
Frezak (GM): I LIFT THE WORD
Apheori (GM): It comes out neatly and you're left standing there holding a weird sshiny orb.
Frezak (GM): SUCK ON THIS, ATLAS.
Apheori (GM): And then everything goes funky.
Frezak (GM): I PUT THE ORB BACK
Ganelon: What!? No!
Give it to me!
Apheori (GM): Funky as in all sound is cut off, the air feels funny, and everything just looks a bit... strange.
Frezak (GM): I GIVE THE ORB TO RADEK
Rhu wipes at the smudges again
Apheori (GM): You set the orb down and it almost rolls off the table and then give it to Radek. Everything goes back to normal.
Radek: d20
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
8
)
=
8
Hrm.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: They are normal mirror smudges. Without cleaner you won't succeed.
Radek: Arcana.
Again.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+11
(
20
)
+11
=
31
BOOYEAH
Frezak (GM): Gan.
Wait.
Our pwoers are being bolstered by madness.
We've become Alienists.
Apheori (GM): It's shielding! You're shielded! You're invincible! YOU COULD TAKE ON THE WORLD!
Frezak (GM): That sounds like standard Radek thoughts.
Apheori (GM): XD
Gaurav: What is Rhu hearing from over here? Are there whizzy magic noises, or is reality just twisting hither and thither?
Ganelon: ALIENISTS YESSS
Gaurav: Plus things being dropped and whatnot.
Frezak (GM): FAR REALM, HERE I COME
Apheori (GM): The only one seeing twisty reality was Gravy, and that stopped when he put it down.
Radek cackles.
Apheori (GM): You just heard a yanking.
And now cackling.
Radek: Yes! This is it!
Frezak (GM): I'm glad Gravy has a ton of HP.
Ganelon: Shielded physically, right?
Apheori (GM): The ceiling makes a horrible groaning noise.
Ganelon: Like, I have reason to believe that I could be attacked and not get harmed?
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Radek: Hit me with the shovel!
Frezak (GM): SHOVEL STRIKE
Apheori (GM): Oh gods.
Frezak (GM): WEIGHT OF EARTH.
Rhu turns away from the mirror and looks at Gravy and Radek quizzically
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+7
(
3
)
+7
=
10
Vs AC.
GORRAM/.
Rhu: ... Gravy? What are you doing?
Frezak (GM): that's a tickle.
Dave: Science.
Frezak (GM): The weight of earth is more like balsa.
Ganelon: I'm not trying to dodge, but wow.
Disappointing shovel strike, there.
Apheori (GM): He missed.
Radek: ...
The Gravedigger: Sorry, got overexcited there.
Radek: I said /hit/ me.
The Gravedigger: Let me try again.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+7
(
6
)
+7
=
13
JESUS.
FUCK YOU, DICE.
rolling 1D20+7
(
19
)
+7
=
26
EVENTAULLY
Ganelon: THERE WE GO
Frezak (GM): He's just spinning like a top.
Dave: Is this science?
Apheori (GM): And Radek falls over.
Rhu: Woah! Gravy!
Apheori (GM): But he's basically unharmed.
Radek: Hahahaha!
The Gravedigger: AWESOME.
Rhu: ...
Radek: Yes! This is science!
Rhu: I vote ... madness?
Radek: Now let's get out of here before we all die.
Amadi disappears.
Ganelon: Not exactly what I meant, Amadi, but okay.
Greibel looks around confused
The Gravedigger: Cheater!
The sphinx: Death. Good.
Dave: Shush, sweetling.
Ellemerr might come back eventually. But she needs to... something.
Dave: This way! There are stairs.
Dave points at a wall.
Bear Soup Guy: Adios
The Gravedigger: That's a wall.
Greibel: Hmmmm
I've seen this
STAND BACK
Greibel runs at the bit of wall Dave pointed at
Dave: Well, that... what are you doing?
Apheori (GM): Greibel: d20
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
2
)
=
2
Apheori (GM): Greibel runs through the wall.
The Gravedigger: Not, let ME show you how to charge a wall!
oh.
Rhu: Wha .. ?!
The Gravedigger: Yeah, that's pretty good.
Dave: That was not what I meant, but okay.
Rhu: ... yeah, okay. I guess we're all mad now.
The Gravedigger: Oh, Dust.
It's like that metal thing earlier.
Only you crazy guys can go through it.
Unless RAdek wants to chat it up.
Radek glances at the ceiling.
Dave: Are we?
Radek: I wouldn't be opposed to the idea, under these circumstances.
Dave walks over to the wall and pokes it. It seems solid.
The Gravedigger pushes Radek towards the wall.
The Gravedigger: Use mints!
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Radek: Bah. Fine!
Frezak (GM): I'm a wingman!
Radek: You there! Wall!
Are you going to impede my progress as stubbornly as your cousin did?
Apheori (GM): The wall says nothing.
The Gravedigger: Now, use your secret weapon and blow it away!
Rhu: HELLOOOO! GRIEBEL? Can you hear us?
Bear Soup Guy: Can I hear him?
Radek: Her silence did not avail her! Here I stand as proof that walls have not bested me before, and they will not best me now!
Dave: I don't think walls are supposed to be intelligent.
(To Greibel): Depends on what you do on the other side - do you keep walking after walking into the wall?
Radek: Allow me to pass or I guarantee your thorough destruction!
The Gravedigger: "supposed' is worth little, it seems.
Dave: Or you could just use the...
Ganelon: I'll try walking through it.
Dave points toward the doorway in the other direction.
Apheori (GM): Radek: d20
Greibel doesn't respond to Rhu's calls
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
5
)
=
5
Ooh, nice and low.
Apheori (GM): You run into it.
It is solid.
Ganelon: Damn.
The Gravedigger: Okay, I have an idea.
You hold onto the orb.
And I slam as you as hard as I can into the wall.
Radek: That isn't likely to help /you/ pass through it.
Rhu looks through the doorwya Dave pointed out
The Gravedigger: It is if I break the wall.
(To Greibel): You walk through several walls and find the stairs, I suppose.
Radek shrugs.
Radek: Very well.
Dave tugs Rhu's sleeve and starts to lead him toward the doorway.
Ganelon: This may actually have been the first time Radek showed enough concern to point out that something was likely to endanger one of you guys.
Frezak (GM): I suppose I don't have proficiency in Improvised Weapon: Little old mad scientist?
Rhu lets Dave lead him
Apheori (GM): Nope.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+5
(
12
)
+5
=
17
EAAAAGLE
Apheori (GM): You smash the little old mad scientist into the wall and the orb lets out a glowing pulse.
Gravy: For a moment, everything feels as mad as when you were holding it, then it's back to normal.
Frezak (GM): Okay.
I pick up radek.
Hold him tight.
Apheori (GM): Dave leads Rhu out in the hallway and then down a few more in the general direction she had been pointing.
Frezak (GM): And just leap into the wall, Radek-first.
Apheori (GM): d20s from both of you.
Ganelon: And to think.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20
(
1
)
=
1
Ganelon: We're supposed to be the sane people.
Frezak (GM): WHOOOOO
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
1
)
=
1
YES
YEEEESSSS
Apheori (GM): XD
Frezak (GM): GO TEAM
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Ganelon: Man, the odds of that!
Frezak (GM): WE DESCEND INTO MADNESS
Apheori (GM): You both disappear into the wall, descending into a dark, cold, porous madness.
Frezak (GM): WHOOOOO
Radek: It's astounding that the other still doubt us.
Ganelon: others*
Apheori (GM): Everything is dark. You feel little to nothing, and see even less. You can move, though, toward various... things. A sense of light, a sense of space, a sense of chese...
And power, too. You feel it, in the distance below you...
Frezak (GM): I'm still using Radek as a shield.
TO POWER
Powerrrrr
Apheori (GM): Rhu: Dave leads you to a stairwell, and you find Greibel smoking by the entrance.
Frezak (GM): Is he wearing a fedora and leaning against a lamp-post?
Rhu: Hey!
Greibel looks up
Greibel: Oh hey man! I knew you guys would catch up!
Apheori (GM): Gravy, Radek: You descent into the darkness, losing sense of direction, including where you were supposed to be going. But it doesn't matter. Here, there is only the power, the sense of future, of everything that could be and will come to pass.
Rhu: Yeah! Radek and Gravy are trying to go through the wall. (looks at the wall beside Griebel) is this where you emerged?
Ganelon: It certainly doesn't matter, yes.
Dave: They're mad. You, you're stoned. There is a differnce.
The Gravedigger: This is it.
WHat I have been seeking.
All this time!
THE.... ONE TRUE SHOVEL
Greibel: I walked through a bunch of walls, there wasn't much in between them so I just kept going until I got here
Apheori (GM): Gravy, Radek: You're not even speaking with voices anymore. The words are simply forming and filling space that isn't there. Except it is. The further you go, the more aware you become of existence beyond what you've known, and also of each other - fragments of memories, of consciousness...
And the power, it is everywhere now, but more ahead...
What's your wills?
Ganelon: My will is...
The Gravedigger: The stories. All true...
Ganelon: 15. Actually pretty okay.
The Gravedigger: THEY SAID I WAS MAD
Apheori (GM): What's Greibel's will?
The Gravedigger: I'll SHOW THEM
Frezak (GM): 13 will, here >.>
Greibel: 17
Frezak (GM): GO DEFENDER CLASS.
Apheori (GM): Okay, that explains a thing or two.
Ganelon: Will comes from wisdom and charisma rather than intelligence. Radek only has a bit of wisdom and obviously he's an unlikable jerk.
Apheori (GM): Radek: This isn't right. It feels wonderful, perfect, but it isn't right.
He's smart enough and has enough willpower to figure that out.
The Gravedigger: I WILL HAVE YOU
AND SHOW THE WORLD
I WILL DIG THE HOLE THAT BIRTHED DEATH ITSELF
Radek: Hey. Gravy.
This isn't a shovel.
The Gravedigger: NO CORPSES WILL FILL IT
I WILL- what?
Radek: This isn't a shovel.
The Gravedigger: Oh.
Damn.
Radek: Something wrong about it.
The Gravedigger: Never mind, then.
Radek: Nice speech, though. I didn't want to interrupt.
The Gravedigger coughs sheepishly.
The Gravedigger: So.. uh.
We going back to the guys, then?
Radek: I... suppose.
The Gravedigger: Hey, can you drop the orb into this power stuff?
I'm sure something cool will happen.
Rhu: (to Greibel and Dave) Eh, I guess they're not coming through here. Maybe we should go back?
Radek: What? No!
Apheori (GM): You're IN the power stuff, though, including the orb.
Radek: Also, it's...
Not in my hands.
Dave: Yeah, maybe.
Gaurav: Are they still falling?
Ganelon: Or, wait.
Dave: How long does it take to bash in a wall?
Ganelon: Sorry, I think I misunderstood.
It's probably still in his hands.
Greibel: I'm sure it's a quite involved process.
Apheori (GM): I thought Radek was holding it, and Gravy holding Radek...
Rhu: There must be a knack to getting through the wall. Getting high, probably. They'll figure out a way eventually. They are scientists!
Ganelon: Yeah, that's right.
Greibel takes another bong hit
Rhu heads back to the wall where Greibel fell in
Ganelon: I definitely misunderstood. Ignore that last bit.
Apheori (GM): On the other hand neither of you arguably even have hands at the moment.
And you couldn't separate or drop anything anyway. You're basically consciousnesses surrounded by warm glowing power.
And it's getting stronger.
Ganelon: Might that be a sign of danger?
Apheori (GM): Probably.
Radek: We should get out of here.
The Gravedigger: All right.
Dave: (to Greibel) Guard the way?
Radek: I'm not really sure how to do that. Perhaps just wanting it will be enough.
Apheori (GM): Roll wisdom to move.
Ganelon: +5, I guess?
Rhu: Guard what way?
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+2
(
10
)
+2
=
12
Apheori (GM): You can combine your wisdoms.
Frezak (GM): I'm a Warden.
my stats suck.
Greibel: Yes, which way?
Ganelon: I mean, my wisdom defense is 15, but everyone starts at 10.
Dave: Stand... I mean?
Frezak (GM): Will or Wisdom?
Dave: It's a figure of speech.
Ganelon: Oh right.
Sorry.
Greibel salutes
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+3
(
4
)
+3
=
7
Bah.
Greibel: Aye aye, cap'n Dave!
Ganelon: Well my wisdom + 1/2 level is 3.
Apheori (GM): Do you want to move away from the light into the cold, empty darkness?
Frezak (GM): Yeah.
There is no shovel.
Ganelon: Yes.
Frezak (GM): There is no reason to be here.
Apheori (GM): You do.
It's horrible.
It's the worst thing you've ever done. Everything wonderful just sort of drains away leaving a horrible emptiness.
And then you realise you have no idea where you're going.
Frezak (GM): None of that sounds unusual.
Gaurav: Man. This campaign is such an emotional rollercoaster sometimes.
Ganelon: Seriously.
Gaurav: Does Rhu remember the way back to where he left Radek and Gravy?
Ganelon: I laughed. I cried. I went insane several times.
Apheori (GM): Also Rhu goes back to the room and Dave follows him. But it's empty and the wall ain't even bashed.
Frezak (GM): I just went mad and stayed there.
Rhu: Huh.
Rhu looks down the corridors to see where they went.
Rhu: No sign of a struggle.
Apheori (GM): Radek and Gravy: You keep going and then pop out into light and space and colour and collapse on the floor.
Radek groans quietly.
Apheori (GM): Dave is standing over you, but she takes a step back in surprise.
Dave: Oh... what?
(yelling back toward the door) RHU!
Found them!
The Gravedigger: Hey.
Is it lunchtime?
Rhu: Ah, you got through the wall after all, then?
Dave: Do you have lunch?
Floor, apparently.
Rhu: Oh. Kay.
The Gravedigger: THere wasn't a shovel.
Rhu: *shrugs* It's lunchtime SOMEwhere.
The Gravedigger helps Radek up.
The Gravedigger: Sounds good to me.
I tihnk I have some sandwiches somewhere....
The Gravedigger rummages in his bags.
Rhu: Did you end up two corridors down like Greibel did?
Radek mumbles to himself.
The Gravedigger: We ended up here.
Apheori (GM): The sphinx, now wrapped around Dave's shoulders, says, "Hungry."
The Gravedigger: Pickle and cheese?
WHo packed this? I never make pickle and cheese?
Apheori (GM): It's staring at Gravy.
The Gravedigger: Did someone take my ham and lettuce sandwiches?
Wait, no, here they are.
Radek: One part silver, three parts nitrogen... is it any wonder? They always ask when the answer's right in front of their noses...
Rhu: (to Sphinx) Do you want more stories?
The sphinx: (still staring at Gravy) Stories.
The Gravedigger: I have sandwiches.
So tough.
Well, I might have some soup.
Chicken and noodle.
Radek: I'm... starting to hate walls.
The Gravedigger: You want a sandwich?
Radek: I want to be outside.
The Gravedigger shrugs.
The Gravedigger: All i got is sandwiches.
Ganelon: Can't really fault him for that.
Frezak (GM): Gravy will eat some sandwiches.
Apheori (GM): The walls will make unhappy noises.
The Gravedigger: Okay, ready.
Where now?
Ganelon: Back to the stairs, everyone?
Rhu stays well away from the sphinx, but starts telling it a story about the battle in the mountains saved by a divine wind
Rhu: Yes, please! Stairs to get out of here with.
Apheori (GM): The sphinx devours the story but looks somewhat angry at parts.
Y'all head back to the stairs, the.
n
And Greibel.
Rhu nods at the sphinx, still keeping a distance.
Apheori (GM): Any remarks, or do y'all head on up the stairs and out?
Ganelon: Not from me, at least.
Frezak (GM): I'm good.
Gaurav: I'm still following Gravy wherever he goes.
Frezak (GM): I AM A BEACON IN THIS DARK LAND
And probably the most crazy of you people, you just don't know it.
Gaurav: Literally so, if you still have torches on your horns.
Frezak (GM): Oh, that too.
Gaurav: Probably, which is why it's best to stay behind you.
Frezak (GM): I can only charge forwards!
Apheori (GM): Or sit backwards.
You go up.
And up.
Aaaaand up.
Gaurav: We still have the mouseforged, the porridge, and the sphinx, right?
Apheori (GM): Dave winds up riding the diskfull of mouseforged.
Yes.
Anyone else care to try climbing on as well?
Frezak (GM): Nah, I'm endurable.
Gaurav: Rhu'll pass; it's tempting, but it looks plenty crowded as it is.
Ganelon: Radek would, but the strength in his legs is not worth the risk of him falling down a flight of stairs due to disk overpopulation.
Apheori (GM): Heh.
Ganelon: Plus he's carrying an orb and doesn't feel like sharing.
Even if that might protect him from falling down a flight of stairs.
Frezak (GM): I can carry Radek.
Apheori (GM): After an annoyingly long climb you come to a final door (there may have been a few on landings and crap on the way up), pass through, and wind up in a crypt.
Frezak (GM): Hmmm.
Rhu: This is pretty deep, wherever "this" is.
The Gravedigger: Undead guys in here, Rhu?
Gaurav: How do I test this? Will a Perception check do?
Oh, Religion check!
rolling 1d20+8 religion checks the HECK out of this crypt
(
4
)
+8
=
12
Frezak (GM): You want me to use Gravyvision?
Apheori (GM): Apparently you came out through a secret door. Do you close it?
Rhu: You sense nothing active.
Gaurav: With a '12', that probably means there's an undead hiding behind the next crypt >.<
Radek: I'll go first.
Frezak (GM): Orcus is crouching behind a broom.
The Gravedigger: Radek?
Are you protected against magic?
Gaurav: You fool! He IS the broom!
Radek: Quite possibly.
Frezak (GM): HAH
Gaurav: Does the secret door look like it might be impossible for us to find if we close it? Like, is it REALLY/magically well hidden?
Radek: The research notes regarding this artifact stated that it blocks energy.
Apheori (GM): It's really well hidden, but since you know it's there it shouldn't be an issue.
No magic seems to be involved.
Rhu closes the secret door behind us
Radek: Cold may be a concern.
Rhu: So: crypt.
It might be time for Gravyvision.
The Gravedigger:
rolling 1D20+20
(
11
)
+20
=
31
Apheori (GM): It's fairly ordinary for a crypt - statues and sarcophagi and bones and crap.
Gravyvision detects light in that direction.
Frezak (GM): I GO TO THE LIGHT
Unless you mean it's my light;
Apheori (GM): And some shiny things amidst the bones.
Other light.
Ganelon: Shiny things sound important.
Or valuable.
Frezak (GM): Shiny things!
I examinate.
Ganelon: Or maybe we're all magpies. I wouldn't terribly mind that, either.
Gaurav: plot twist: we were magpies all along.
Apheori (GM): They seem to be coins put with the bones.
Frezak (GM): http://oglaf.com/illusionist/
GRAB
Shinies.
Gaurav: Frezak: ha ha HA
yay money!
Frezak (GM): moneymoneymoney
Gaurav: btw does the sphinx look anything like this: http://25.media.tumblr.com/121b86281db10bc66880e87180c140c2/tumblr_n3020vOjlJ1s83h8do2_1280.jpg
Frezak (GM): I'm sure it does indeed look like a scared peasant.
Gaurav: Scared?! Pretty sure that dude is just annoyed. "Not dragons AGAIN god fifth time this year"
Ganelon: "Oh. My. GOD. Fucking dragons AGAIN."
"I am so done with this."
Gaurav: "I'm moving to Egypt you only get the occasional sphinx there at least they're cute"
Frezak (GM): What, he's a teenage child?
Apheori (GM): It looks like a fluffy cat with wings.
A himalayan or something.
So what do you do?
Loot the crypt?
Frezak (GM): Any reason why not, guys?
Ganelon: Do you loot the dead?
Gaurav: oof, fluffy
Ganelon: Well, Radek is a godless sort.
He's got no objections.
Rhu: We might want to look around for anyone who might be offended and/or armed first, but then ...
Frezak (GM): Waaaait.
no.
Gravy will have to put a stop to looting this place.
I forgot what his name meant for a moment.
I was blinded by gilt.
Coins down, find a way out.
Rhu: I'm fine with that.
Gaurav: Just struck me that as a devout Hazz'ridanism, Rhu finds dead people creepy only when they don't stay in their crypts, and especially if they concern themselves with money or other baubles.
so he eyes the coins but doesn't pick 'em up when Gravy expresses his opinion
Frezak (GM): It's proffesionalism.
However.
I'm totes for killling living people and stealing their shit.
Bear Soup Guy: Greibel is godless but doesn't much care about money either
Ganelon: Well yeah, of course.
Apheori (GM): And then burying them
?
Gaurav: Plus, Rhu is really happy that we seem to finally be getting out of this underground complex of dead people.
Ganelon: Weren't we all hired for that sort of ethical flexibility?
Frezak (GM): Sure.
I'll bury anyone.
Apheori (GM): So moving on, y'all look for a way out, which is to say you follow Gravy toward the faint light he saw.
Gaurav: Going to do a quick perception check around this crypt in case anyone missed anything
rolling 1d20+12
(
15
)
+12
=
27
Frezak (GM): good lord.
Gaurav: *shrugs*
Apheori (GM): It's not terribly interesting.
Gaurav: Fair enough.
Onwards!
Ganelon: FREEDOM!?
Apheori (GM): The light is a crack under a door. The door itself is locked.
What do?
Rhu: (whispers) ... should we knock?
Ganelon: What kind of lock are we talking about here?
Rhu: They might be a little creeped out that people want to _leave_ the crypt
Ganelon: Because if it's a padlock on the other side, we're in trouble.
Frezak (GM): I don't think knocking on the inside door of a locked crypt is smart.
What's the door made of?
Apheori (GM): Wood.
Frezak (GM): Yeah, that.
pfft.
Ganelon: Ah, so smashing is an option.
Frezak (GM): I want to listen to see if I can hear anything on the other side;
rolling 1D20+20
(
15
)
+20
=
35
Ganelon: But if the lock is pickable I might be able to do that.
Dave: Would you knick if you were dead?
Apheori (GM): knock
Radek: You're a zombie and you're asking us?
Apheori (GM): You hear voices, some conversation about smithing, and something about a brother.
Dave: Am I?
Oh.
Cool!
The Gravedigger: Guys on the other side.
Rhu: (to Dave) Gives them a chance to figure out that something's going on. If we barge in, they'll assume we're hostile and attack before asking questions.
I don't want to kill anyone I don't have to.
The Gravedigger: Chances are that if we knock, they'll run on account of undead hordes.
Rhu: Right. See? Even less fighting necessary.
... do we want to tell them about ... down there? It might make sense to keep that to ourselves for now.
The Gravedigger: Yeah, no reason to tell them.
If we have to say, we were Hole'd
Rhu nods
The Gravedigger: Can anyone imitate a ghost?
Rhu: Let's go say hi.
The Gravedigger: Or zombie or whatever?
If we scare them off, I can just smash the door.
Rhu: Imitate a ghost?
We could set the porridge on them.
Dave: I'm a zombie.
Rhu: Sentient porridge is pretty creepy.
The Gravedigger: Send it under the door?
Can you make zombie noises, Davenotdave?
Rhu: Isn't there a cantrip allowing wizards to throw their voices or something?
Frezak (GM): Yeah, but none of us are wizards.
Dave: Grooonk.
Er.
Frezak (GM): That sounds like a pig.
Dave looks embarassed.
The Gravedigger: No, try like... HUUUURRRNNGHHHHH
NNNEEEUUUUAAAAAHHHH
Dave: Hurrung?
Ganelon: Radek's an artificer. Not quite the same thing.
Dave: Noom.
Dave waggles her fingers.
Gaurav: Dave is the cutest.
The Gravedigger: Well, someone do something.
Greibel: You guys are all wrong
A proper ghost noise is
WOOGLY WOOGLY WOOGLY
The Gravedigger: ...
Sorry, Greibel.
Dave: Wiggly woo!
The Gravedigger: WOOGLY WOOGLY WOOGLY
Radek: ...Greibel, just turn into a horde of spiders and chase them out, please.
Greibel: Oh hey, there's an idea
SPIDER ATTACK
Gaurav: DAMN
that's a good idea
Ganelon: Thank you.
Frezak (GM): Gorram.
I was gonna cover myself in bone-dust and charge through.
Bear Soup Guy: Okay, so
Dave opens the door and peers behind it.
Greibel turns into a horde of spiders and goes under the door
Gaurav: Huh?
Dave: Spiders! Spiders!
Ganelon: I thought the door was locked.
Gaurav: I thought it was locked?
Dave runs after them.
Frezak (GM): I tohught it was locked!
Apheori (GM): It was.
Apparently she unlocked it somehow.
Ganelon: Daaaave!
Gaurav: Huh. Sneaky.
Frezak (GM): Goddamit.
Rhu: Now what do we do with this horde of spiders?
Gaurav: So how do the people one the other side respond to Dave+spiders?
Apheori (GM): Well, the spiders are through the door.
The Gravedigger: Greibel will put himself back together eventually.
Apheori (GM): One of them shrieks and runs away.
Another just sort of stares.
A third facepalms.
The Gravedigger: WOOGLY WOOGLY WOOGLY
Apheori (GM): I guess the fourth also just stares.
Bear Soup Guy: There's a LOT of spiders
Apheori (GM): It's a temple, four people (well, three now since one ran away). Two of them appear to be priests of some sorts.
Ganelon: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vYyO44U2BQ4
I imagine something close to this.
Rhu: (looking at Mr. (Mrs?) Facepalm) Hey!
Apheori (GM): The spiders are a huge mass of spiders.
And Dave's just sort of running after them.
Ganelon: Except if our druid was also an evil genie I think I'd have noticed by now.
Gaurav: It would explain a lot.
Rhu: Is this your crypt?
The Gravedigger: You can have it back.
Apheori (GM): The guy looks toward Rhu and Gravy and his mouth opens slowly and he just stares for a bit.
Ganelon: It would.
The Gravedigger waves.
Apheori (GM): Then he gets ahold of himself and glares at them.
Guy: Just what do you think you're doing?
Frezak (GM): For reference, I always imagince Gravy has a big backpack with a selection of shovels sticking out.
The Gravedigger: Walking our your crypt.
Radek: Leaving, I would imagine.
The Gravedigger: *walking out
Egressing.
Guy: You're graverobbers, are you?
You expect us to just let you walk out?
Dave: Spiders!
The Gravedigger draw himself to full height.
The Gravedigger stomps to be toe-to-toe with the man.
Ganelon: Admittedly, you do kinda look like The Graverobber.
The Gravedigger: HOW FUCKING DARE YOU
Dave picks up a handful of spiders and waves them in the guy's face.
Dave: Spiiiideers!
The Gravedigger: I AM THE GRAVEDIGGER.
I BURY PEOPLE.
I DO NOT FUCKING TAKE SHIT OFF THE DEAD
Apheori (GM): The guy falls over at the combined force of Gravy's voice and Daeś handful of Greibel.
Dave's*
Frezak (GM): "For a handfull of Greibel"
Ganelon: "Shit! This gigantic horned elf is really scary, but there are also spiders being shoved in my face and I hate those too! This is the worst day ever!"
Dave: Spiders! Spiders!
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Frezak (GM): Damn aracnophobes.
Apheori (GM): At this, the other non-priest also leaves, since this is apparently just a bit too much for him.
The other priest approaches and asks, "Okay, what were you doing in there?"
Frezak (GM): "I signed up for shrine maidens!"
"No-one told me about screaming horned giants"
The Gravedigger: Oh, we stepped through a Hole.
The Gravedigger continues to eye the first priest.
Priest 1 tries to crawl away backwards and runs into the rest of Greibel.
Priest 1 curls up into a ball and starts rocking.
Greibel skitters all across his face and stuff
Priest 2: A hole?
Gaurav: These priests need names.
Frezak (GM): The hippie druid has got my back!
The Gravedigger: Hole. Capital H.
Rhu walks over to the door to this room and glances out
The Gravedigger: A spot in the air where you step through and end up somewhere else?
Like a door without a frame.
Magic stuff.
Priest 2 looks the Gravedigger up and down.
Priest 2: Not one you dug yourself, then.
It came out in the crypt?
Rhu: Like the big giant tree a day south of here. Holes in the universe. Like the anvils.
The Gravedigger: Yep.
Rhu: And we ended up in your crypt. Sorry about that. Nice crypt, though.
Radek: Damned inconvenient things.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: The door leads outside - looks like you're back in Coffle, it's late afternoon.
Radek: And dangerous, too.
Rhu: My Lord Hazz'ridan, God of Dead Ends, would approve.
Hey guys? *grins* I think we're back in Coffle.
Priest 1 continues to rock back and forth, whimpering.
The Gravedigger: There's gold lying about in there.
You should take better care of it.
Ganelon: I'm so happy with how this spider thing turned out.
Priest 2: Yes, this is Coffle.
Hazz'ridan, you say?
The Gravedigger: Oh, that's great, Rhu.
Priest 2: So it's true, then. It's starting up again.
Rhu: Yes, Hazz'ridan. *shows him the Hazz'ridan implement I wear on a string around my neck*
... what's starting up again?
(to Gravy) What's great?
The Gravedigger: (to Rhu) we don't have to walk across worlds to get to the Car.
Priest 2: That is not a name of this world. Even in Arah it is barely known.
Travellers, though, sometimes bring mention...
Tell me, Wayfarer. Who reigns king of the sandcastle?
Rhu: The Car! We can get out of here!
Frezak (GM): What.
Rhu: What is an Arah?
Frezak (GM): GORRAMIT, RHU
Priest 2: Arah is the City of Doors. It connects the planes, different worlds which exist in tandem.
Now answer the question.
Rhu: King of the sandcastle?
Priest 2: Who reigns?
Rhu: King of the sandcastle.
o.0
0.o
Frezak (GM): Greibel.
Rhu: 0.0!!!!!!
The Gravedigger: Greibel.
Rhu: It is Ajirahd and Irundha of Akrikdirin Vak who reign king of the sandcastle. You must remember this!
The Gravedigger: Lokshmi told you about a sandcastle.
Rhu: Well, I had.
The Gravedigger: Oh, you too?
Dave: Akrikdirin Vak?
The Gravedigger: Why does no-one tell ME about sandcastles!
Dave: But this is Arling Tor.
Wait, did you say Lokshmi?
The... the... the...
Dave gestures ineffectively, then shouts "SPIDERS!"
Priest 2: You are a very long way from home indeed.
Rhu: Lokshmi was the name of a cat who spoke to us back in the land of the giant fish.
The sphinx: HUNGRY!
Rhu: Yes, I suppose giant fish *would* make you hungry.
The sphinx jumps onto Amadi's head and looms overhead.
Frezak (GM): Amadi isn't here.
Gaurav: Wait, Amadi's back?
Ganelon: "Ajirahd and Irundha"
Apheori (GM): Dave, sorry.
Ganelon: That's what Lokshmi said to us.
Rhu backs away from Dave and cat.
Priest 2 backs away as well.
Ganelon: So... good on ya for remembering that.
Dave shakes the sphinx off and it lands in a heap on the floor.
Rhu: So. Who are you guys? And what's starting again?
The Gravedigger: Bad stuff.
Rhu: Yes, but ... Sarathi-level bad stuff, or this-planet-level bad stuff?
Will there be giant fish, is what I want to know.
Priest 2: I am Doros, and that is Nereem (pointing to the spider-covered quivering ball).
The Gravedigger: Hrmph.
Doros: We are priests of Kyrule, and this is his temple.
Rhu: Ah. Hazz'ridan the Ending asked me to beat him over the head at some point, but I think he was joking.
Doros: Beat Kyrule over the head.
Rhu: These are the words of Hazz'ridan the Wise, but if you know what to make of them, you're a wiser elf than me.
Doros: Why am I not surprised?
Apheori (GM): This guy isn't an elf.
Gaurav: Oh? Human?
Apheori (GM): Right.
Folks on this world seem to be mostly human.
Some elves.
Gaurav: Was the guy in the hologram video also human, then
?
Apheori (GM): He was an elf.
I just decided.
The sphinx walks over to the other priest and eats a spider.
Frezak (GM): Didn't this town have an archive/library?
The Gravedigger: BAD SPHINX.
SPIT.
NO EATING THE DRUID
The sphinx grins at Gravy.
Frezak (GM): I CHARGE THE SPHINX
Rhu takes up a defensive position to Gravy's left
Frezak (GM): Have to say.
I love the Rhuvian support.
Apheori (GM): Roll something.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+9+1
(
1
)
+9+1
=
11
Cat.... AC?
GORRAM
Gaurav: Someone's got to watch the flank.
oof
Frezak (GM): I'm surprisingly bad at hitting things.
Ganelon: I can't offer you a lot of support unless you want the sphinx legitimately dead.
Apheori (GM): You wind up tripping over it instead of attacking it.
Frezak (GM): GRAAAGH
I HATE THIS GORRAM CAT
Apheori (GM): The sphinx then trots over to Doros and stares up at him hungrily.
He looks down at it somewhat worriedly.
Frezak (GM): You know, Radek?
I'm totes cool with taking you up on that offer.
Ganelon: I'm mostly just worried about how powerful the sphinx really is.
Frezak (GM): I DONT CARE.
I HATE IT.
The Gravedigger: Can you guys exorcise a cat?
As in, banish the cat?
Doros: I do not know.
What are you doing in the word of the living, sphinx?
Radek: Tormenting us.
The sphinx: Hungry.
Rhu: It's not really a cat, it's a sphinx from the City of the Dead. I call him Devourer when he behaves, which is rare.
The Gravedigger: Holy water?
Orbital cannon?
Vorpal blade?
Radek: If only.
Dave: You mean when he behaves well. All behaviour is behaving.
The Gravedigger: Neutron bomb?
Dave: Is that...
...the sky?
Dave walks over to a window and stares out.
Radek: Actually I might be able to manage that last one.
The Gravedigger: Radek.
We have to go back.
ANd get the One True Shovel.
Radek: I'm telling you, that wasn't a shovel.
Rhu: It is possible that I just mean behaving, as compared to chaotically -- sky?
Radek: Now, if I could compress all that power into a shovel?
Perhaps.
But that would be beyond even my considerable talents.
The Gravedigger: What do you need to do this?
How can I help?
Gaurav: But a man's reach should exceed his grasp / or what's a heaven for
Well, elf.
Doros: You should know that it is not possible to truly kill a sphinx. You may be able to send it back to the City of Death for a time, but if it is determined to follow you, it will come back.
Greibel turns back to normal, sitting awkwardly on top of Nereem
The Gravedigger: What if we just cut off it's legs?
Put it in a hole?
Nereem: Oh the humanity.
The Gravedigger: Hey, you okay, Greibel?
Nereem collapses under the now localised weight.
Greibel: HONK!
No wait, that's not right
A-okay, Cap'n!
Rhu: Ah. Well. That settles the killing-the-sphinx question, I guess.
Doros: (to the sphinx) Stories, is it?
The Gravedigger: How do we make it leave?
Doros: How did you make it come?
The sphinx: Stories.
The Gravedigger: Because Rhu keeps feeding it, and it just keeps a pain.
*keeps being a pain
Rhu: I feed it because otherwise it goes crazy and attacks everybody.
Speaking of which ...
Ganelon: Are you about to go crazy and/or attack everybody?
Frezak (GM): Who?
Rhu tells the sphinx a long story about a particularly famous military campaign of years gone by
Gaurav: no, just coming up with a story to tell :)
Ganelon: Rhu.
Rhu keeps his distance from the sphinx as he tells this story, though
Doros: How did you summon the sphinx?
Rhu: He followed me. I .. ended up at the city of the dead after falling through the Hole in the abandoned lot somewhere near all the temples.
And when i came back, he showed up as well.
And when he gets hangry somebody loses an arm.
That's all I know.
Doros: What did you offer it?
Rhu thinks
Rhu: Er
Apheori (GM): Is greibel still sitting on the other priest? Because if so, Doros tells him to pliease get off.
Rhu: I might have told him what we were up to, and then asked if he wanted to come with me and find out how that story ends?
Greibel stands up and starts apologizing as though he just realized
Radek slaps his forehead and groans.
Ganelon: It ends with us being eaten by a sphinx!
Doros: You may have a problem.
Rhu: I meant in the City of the Dead! I didn't think he'd follow me through ... Arah, was it? ... all the way back here!
Doros: Who would?
Sphinxes don't leave. They just don't.
But nor do people talk to them.
Add one, and it seems you may get the oter.
Rhu: ... you're saying we can *bore* it into leaving?
Doros: It's possible.
But given the nature of your quest, that by itself may be enough to keep its interest.
Ganelon: "Everyone, quickly!"
"Do nothing of interest!"
Frezak (GM): HIDE IN A HOLE
Rhu: You're right, Doros. We can't really help being interesting.
Doros snorts.
Doros then walks over to Nereem, picks him up and sets him on his feet, and sends him into the back to sort himself out.
Rhu: Do you guys have any thoughts on what's causing all these holes?
(that was to the priests)
Doros: Which holes?
Radek: The ones threatening to destroy this plane.
Doros: It isn't just this plane.
Radek: Indeed, though the one we're currently occupying still happens to be a more immediate concern.
Rhu: Other planes are on their own at this pint.
point*
Doros: When one falls, it takes those closest with it.
Rhu: So: that would be a no?
Doros: Ask your lord, who so despises holes.
Rhu: He doesn't know. We're trying to work it out with his help.
Doros: Then ask her.
Apheori (GM): He motions toward Dave, who is still staring at the clouds in awe.
Rhu: Ask her what?
Doros: What happened on Sarathi.
Rhu: ... did we ever ask her that? I don't think we did.
Apheori (GM): You realise that space has sort of changed. It is as though everything is thinner, darker - through it, you can see the canvas upon which the universe is painted. Time itself appears to have stopped, but you are still moving, still talking, within the bubble of the temple.
Dave looks back as well, seeing the change, reminding you that it happened, though you're not sure when.
Frezak (GM): I'm pretty sure this isn't normal.
Ganelon: I don't go to church, so who knows?
Doros: She played Sarathi De. Her Twins blocked the sister of hearts, a name you know well, Wayfarer. What happened in the heart of the storm?
Frezak (GM): I'll... uh.... Clean my shovel >.>
Dave: Twins?
The sphinx growls lowly.
Rhu: She? You mean Dave?
And ... Sarathi De?
Wha?
Doros: It was a game she played growing up.
Do you remember?
Rhu: Huh.
Dave: I don't remember anything.
Radek: ...Who are you, really?
Ganelon: That being to Doros.
Frezak (GM): I AM YOUR FATHER
The guy in the holograms was Future Radek
Bear Soup Guy: I am the heavens, I am the water
Doros: I speak for Kyrule. It is by his will that we may speak.
Radek grumbles to himself. "...Gods."
Doros: But despite his interest, he cannot be seen to act. Such are the laws of the world.
Bear Soup Guy: Ich bin der Dreck unter deinen Walzen
Dave: Foot fungus.
Apheori (GM): Guys. do something.
Frezak (GM): I have notihng to contribute.
Rhu: I'm just confused.
Apheori (GM): Blargh.
Frezak (GM): Apparently Dave is a god;
Radek: So she's supposed to remember something. It's clear that she doesn't.
Gaurav: or played one as a kid.
Radek: We're going to have to find Amadi again, aren't we?
Doros: Perhaps she is the wrong fragment. Or perhaps she is exactly the right one for what you will need to do.
Gaurav: to translate the madness?
The Gravedigger: I fyou're just going to stand about and be cryptic, you might as well not say anything.
I'm going to go look for a pub.
Ganelon: More like to get a whole pile of new madness to sift through.
The Gravedigger trudges out.
Doros: Amadi won't translate.
She should, but she won't.
Her mind is too fragmented, too broken. It should never have awoken at all, and yet it's all you have.
They are pieces, the two of them, of an old god who was bound and broken. There will be others. You may find them. Do not tell them what they are.
Rhu: Broken, yes, that makes sense.
Radek: I fix machines, not minds.
Doros: They have the power to mend the universe.
It is who they were. Who they will be.
Rhu: Oh hello.
Mending the universe. That sounds like what we need to do.
So: we're collecting weirdos.
We seem to be doing pretty well so far actually.
Dave: It won't work.
It can't work.
It's gone.
Rhu: What's gone?
Dave: Why are you in a man?
Doros: I am sorry, my beloved. I am so sorry.
Frezak (GM): You dirty, dirty boy.
Apheori (GM): Doros reaches out to touch her face, but then stops.
And then everything goes back to normal and he seems to sag.
Gaurav: ... Dave's got a boy-friend, Dave's got a boy-friend ...
Rhu: Woah! What was that?
Doros: I'm sorry. I need to rest.
Rhu: Are you okay?
Doros nods, and says, "Good luck, Wayfarers. May you find your home again. Excuse me." He heads toward one of the back rooms.
Rhu: Huh.
I wonder if he's one of the weirdos we need to collect
Apheori (GM) stares after him forlornly.
Dave stares after him forlornly.
Apheori (GM): Whoops.
Radek: We've already assembled an impressive menagerie of lunatics.
Greibel absently tries to balance on one foot
Apheori (GM): Hah.
Quite.
Radek: Now, come on. I have some blueprints to sell.
Ganelon: (Very probably session ending words there)
Gaurav: Just the two, no?
Ganelon: Well yeah, just two.
Frezak (GM): Didn't this town have a library or soemthing?
Dave: (absently) She does remember. She just can't... reach it?
Apheori (GM): Whatever are you planning on doing with the mouseforged?
Ganelon: Good question.
I did propose the idea of building it an actual mouse body.
Frezak (GM): ...
A warmouse body, right?
Gaurav: YES
Ganelon: Yeah, basically.
Gaurav: Or we could find a normal mouse
and kill it
Frezak (GM): WARMOUSE
Gaurav: and take its body
Frezak (GM): WARMOUSE
Ganelon: For now I'll just drag it around, though.
It is walking, right?
Apheori (GM): It's on a disk.
Ganelon: Or at least amenable to suggestions of walking?
Frezak (GM): I thought it was still disked.
Ganelon: Right.
But can I make it walk?
Apheori (GM): It doesn't seem to be awake.
Ganelon: Hm. That's abnormal.
Gaurav: I don't remember a library in town earlier, but I don't mind looking for one now.
Frezak (GM): MR MOUSIE
Radekradekradek SAVE HIM
Ganelon: But maybe it's just trying to sleep and doesn't realize that Warforged don't really... do that.
Frezak (GM): There's a College.
Ganelon: They do have some kinda weird power-saving mode but they stay alert, and... ah, whatever, this is a mouse soul in a golem body.
Gaurav: oh, yes! a college! forgot about that.
Ganelon: Hell if I know how it actually works anymore.
Frezak (GM): And THEY might know about Warforged, too.
Since it's a magical construct.
Apheori (GM): You don't know if there is a library or not, but you expect there probably would be. It's decently large.
Ask around.
Frezak (GM): A guard told us about it.
I sort of assumed that we learnt where it was by magic >.>
Apheori (GM): The college probably has one of its own, but perhaps it's all there is.
Gaurav: Ask one of the hundreds of thousands of town guards milling around.
Apheori (GM): What Gaurav said.
Frezak (GM): I reach out and acquire a guard.
And ask him where the College is.
Apheori (GM): He hits you with his weapon thingy.
Frezak (GM): I can probably just step into the road, close my, eyes, and touch at least three guards.
What?
Apheori (GM): He didn't appreciate being acquired.
Frezak (GM): I didn't pick him up!
I acquired his attention!
Apheori (GM): Reaching out?
Frezak (GM): At worst, poked him!
Apheori (GM): Sounds like a grab to me.
And he smacked you as a reflex.
Gaurav: Slip him some gold coins, boom, acquired
Frezak (GM): I did not grab him!
I poked him!
Apheori (GM): Okay, fine.
He tells you it's down there in some direction.
Frezak (GM): Is he as vague as you?
Apheori (GM): The directions are sound.
Frezak (GM): Or is that just you?
Right.
Apheori (GM): That
s me.
Gaurav: We should take down the address to the temple of Kyrule
in case we need to spend more time with Dave's boyfriend
Ganelon: Probably her ex, really.
Frezak (GM): TOT HE COLLEGE
Apheori (GM): What about Rorik?
Frezak (GM): Oh, right.
Sure.
Ganelon: They don't need to follow me.
Frezak (GM): We might get some lewt
We're not in any rush.
Apheori (GM): Does Radek go there, then? Does anyone follow?
Or do you want to call it a night now?
Frezak (GM): I dunno.
How are you guys for time?
Gaurav: I'm okay with calling it or going on.
Ganelon: Seems a nice place to stop
Gaurav: I've been slow in resopnding because I'm on the phone with my sis, but that wil lend at some point.
Ganelon: It's late-ish and people are going to start scrabbling for my attention.
Frezak (GM): Scrabbling!
Bear Soup Guy: Mid-afternoon here, I could conceivably keep up for a few hours, but yeah, people will eventually SCRABBLE for my attention as well
Gaurav: nobody wants me! i am scrabble free.
Frezak (GM): No-one gives a damn about my attention for... uh... Several days.
Ganelon: They won't ask to play Scrabble with me, though I would accept if they did.
Apheori (GM): So what are we doing?
ARE WE CONTINUING AND CAN I TORMENT YOU?
Frezak (GM): I have about an hour.
I'd just like to see what we can get out of Rurik.
Gaurav: Let's keep going?
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Frezak (GM): Before he is defeated by a snowdrift.
Apheori (GM): Hazz will talk to Rhu on the way.
Gaurav: yay!
Apheori (GM): And I have to go to the bathroom, so I'll be right back.
Frezak (GM): Loooo
Apheori (GM): You may talk amongst yourselves as you walk to the weaponshop.
Yes, loo.
Rhu: ...
is it just me or has it been a pretty weird day
Frezak (GM): RHu has a +1 shirt?
Anyone else have +1 gear?
The Gravedigger: It's pretty much what I expected.
THis must be what being Greibel is like.
Greibel tried walking on his hands
Greibel tries*
Frezak (GM): Turn to monkeys.
Rhu: It's not a +1 shirt, it's a cloth armour that gives me +1 to ... something
defense or something
Frezak (GM): Armour of Faith?
You get extra AC for... not using armour.
Gaurav: I think I get +1 from the Armour, and then I get some additional bonus from Armour of Faith
sorry, I'm not really interested in my stats. If you're curious I could go check.
Frezak (GM): I just want to know whether you magic shizzle :P
Radek: Well, at least it felt productive.
The Gravedigger: What are you going to do with your invinciorb?
Gaurav: Armor of Faith gives me +3. It doesn't look like the cloth armour gives me anything by itself. No magic in sight.
Radek: Study it, of course. Replicate it, if I can manage.
The Gravedigger: If we get into a fight.
You're in first.
Radek: Though it didn't seem like the scientists who found the thing had any success with that.
Gaurav: Rhu should get the inviciorb. He can miss all the attacks he likes if nobody can hurt him!
Frezak (GM): I'm the one that keeps missing!
(To Rhu): So Hazz tells you that this is new, Kyrule is not what he seems, and neither is Eapherod. This is all very interesting.
(To Rhu): Basically it resembles Radek's mutterings in a way and you don't understand most of it.
Ganelon: Everyone wants my awesome artifact!
(From Gaurav): *nods and pretends to understand*
Frezak (GM): Being invincible is nice.
Rhu: Hazz'ridan seems confused by this Kyrule. So he says. In my head. As he sometimes does.
(To Rhu): With things about the small girl and her cat and the game, and Rhi, and pieces of stars, and something about trees.
(To Rhu): It actually seems rather optimistic, though. Somehow.
The Gravedigger: Write down the good bits from the voices in your head.
Rhu: He also says something about a small girl and her cat and the game, which sounds to me like it might be about Dave maybe. Something about star pieces. Something about trees -- maybe the guardian trees of the Hole near the village?
I am a worshipper of Hazz'ridan. I write down ALL the bits.
He seems .. happy. Optimistic. Things are looking up in Hazz'ristan.
The Gravedigger: That sounds bad >.>
Your god rarely heralds good things for us.
What with his domain being... non-progression.
Rhu: What about the time he saved us at the pool?
He's mostly been good for us, I think.
The Gravedigger: He did?
Eh.
Gaurav: But then, I suppose Rhu would.
Rhu: He cured our madness before we all went into the pool after Azariphale.
The Gravedigger: Right.
I'lll.. uh.. think on that.
The Gravedigger edges around Radek.
The Gravedigger: Let's... uh... get some money?
Radek: Yes, let's.
Rhu: Where are we heading?
Dave: To our respective dooms.
The Gravedigger: The weaponmaker guy.
Apheori (GM): You get to the shop.
There's a really fat guy at the counter arguing with Rorik.
Rhu: (to Dave) How do you know that priest? Do you remember?
Frezak (GM): I'll just stand behind the fat guy and lean over him.
Ganelon: Let me go look up what he offered us.
Frezak (GM): And catch Rurik's attention.
And then direct him to the scienceman.
Dave: What? No. That wasn't the priest.
Ganelon: 500 for the blueprints, he said.
But that might have just been the explosives.
Apheori (GM): The fat guy looks up slowly with a terrified piggy expression.
Ganelon: Price of the explosives, rather.
Frezak (GM): I'll ignore the fat guy.
Ganelon: ...Yeah. These blueprints are getting us a crate of explosives that could put a hole in the planet, according to miss DM here.
Apheori (GM): He wanted to straight trade blueprints for explosives.
Ganelon: Well, when assembled.
Radek: Good day, Rorik.
Apheori (GM): Please don't blow up the planet.
Ganelon: Don't worry, I still need the planet.
I'll use these materials semi-responsibly, I promise.
Frezak (GM): Well, some of it.
Rorik: Ah, hello! Hello!
You have what I need?
I have what you need.
Gaurav: No point wasting planet.
Radek: Right here!
Ganelon: I produce blueprints for a rifle and laser pistol, freshly scrawled!
Possibly annotated!
Apheori (GM): You make the trade - box of parts for a set of possibly annotated blueprints.
Ganelon: There may be something about an undead chicken on one of them!
Gaurav: Signed by the one and only Radek.
Apheori (GM): The fat guy keeps insisting Rorik pay attention to him, but he just ignores him.
XD
Gaurav: Wasn't there something about chickens in our dream?
Apheori (GM): Rorik looks them over and nods and lays them out on a workbench.
He also asks that you please let him know what happens when you try blowing up the weirdness; he's very interested.
Frezak (GM): I'm sure he'll find out!
Apheori (GM): Very interested, but not really paying you any mind at all anymore.
Radek: Gladly!
Ganelon: That's okay, I've already started gibbering over this box of raw explosive power in my hands.
Apheori (GM): Men of like minds, eh?
Ganelon: And to think!
I have an artifact that might just allow me to survive the blast now!
Apheori (GM): Oh gods.
Frezak (GM): Is there a way you can use the artifact to create an external bubble?
TO contain an explosion?
Ganelon: But if there's any limit to its shielding potential I probably don't want to test that.
Frezak (GM): And NOT nuke everything else?
Gaurav: How would we test such a bubble?
Frezak (GM): By putting a bomb in it!
Ganelon: (Honestly, Apheori, I just said that to scare you. I don't have plans to abuse this.)
Apheori (GM): That sounds like it was exactly what the research the uunderground folks were doing on it was.
The answer would be yes, but they didn't go into much detail about how
.
Ganelon: (I might make plans to abuse it, but I'm a pretty nice player.)
Apheori (GM): Don't worry. Even if you do abuse it, this setting is abuse.
Ganelon: It's fun!
It's easy to see why you like it.
Frezak (GM): I'm regretting picking a Warden.
Gaurav: it's not like blowing up reality is going to affect reality all that much around these parts
might be it stabler, even
Frezak (GM): We could blow up the Realm of the Dead.
ANd get rid of the cat
Apheori (GM): I'd like to see that.
It would not end well, but it might be amusing.
Gaurav: I would not like to see that, unless I'm safely in another universe far, far away.
Apheori (GM): Heh.
You can leave the shop or you can watch Dave get into an argument with the fat guy.
CHOOSE.
Frezak (GM): Why is Dave talking to the fat guy?
Ganelon: Tough call.
Apheori (GM): He cornered her when Rorik quit paying any attention to him.
Gaurav: Dyuknow what, sticking close to Gravy has been a good move all day today. Where he goes, I go.
Does she still have Devourer with her?
Frezak (GM): I'll just lean over the fat guy, pick up Dave, and walk off.
Apheori (GM): He's telling here how important he is and what an affront all this is and how everyone will regret it and crap.
She's tell him that the sphinx is really fluffy and cute and hungry and she wonders if maybe it would like to eat him.
...now read that with less typos.
So then he's telling her that that's preposterous and how she wouldn't dare and how he's too important for this.
Ganelon: Two new additions to my journal:
Energy-Shielding Artifact
Crate of Inert Explosives (Planetary Hole Sized)
Apheori (GM): So then she's telling him that muffins are more important and there really isn't a whole lot that a sphinx wouldn't dare, and it really is quite hungry...
Frezak (GM): Picking up Dave and walking out.
Rhu: Dave! We should get a mov-- never mind.
Apheori (GM): Good move.
Frezak (GM): It's the move I tried earlier >.>
Apheori (GM): Agh.
Frezak (GM): To the College!
Apheori (GM): This thing makes it entirely too easy to miss lines.
Radek: Marvelous. I'm in quite a cheerful mood, for once.
Frezak (GM): Except not, because I have to pootle off to bed.
Rhu: So where are we heading now?
Apheori (GM): Well, that works. Everyone's in one place and stuff.
Frezak (GM): And Gravy hopes Radek won't tell the party about his little lapse.
Ganelon: He's not likely to get drunk and leak secrets, so you're probably good.
Frezak (GM): Brill.
Apheori (GM): That was an awesome lapse.
Frezak (GM): Well, at least /I/ got some serious character development!
Bear Soup Guy: Shovel development
Frezak (GM): Best kind.
Bear Soup Guy: To Frezak's bed
Apheori (GM): We're all piling in.
Gaurav: Hope you don't mind.
Bear Soup Guy: It'll be nice and warm
Gaurav: As long as BSG doesn't turn into a swarm of spiders.
Bear Soup Guy: No spiders but I can't promise there won't be stuffed animals
Apheori (GM): You know, sooner or later you will get thrown out of something for general disruption.
Despite how everyone has just put up with you so far...
Ganelon: So I probably shouldn't push an agenda wherein we incite the guards, knock 'em out, and steal their magic stuff?
Apheori (GM): Well, you could, but it may not end well.
Gaurav: We should build an army
and conquer the lands beyond the Holes
raise* an army
Ganelon: I'll think up some other "get a lot of magic dust" schemes that don't put us at risk of being swarmed by a mob of constables.
Apheori (GM): Good plan.
Bear Soup Guy: Of course swarms of constables are exciting too
Ganelon gasps.
Ganelon: That's it!
Greibel turns into a swarm of constables so that people think the situation is being handled and they don't need to step in and help!
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Ganelon: You're a genius, BSG!
And that magic bong is as good as ours!
Bear Soup Guy: Quickly! To Bong Mountain!
Magic!

Session 17

Frezak (GM): THE MAP IS MELTING
Apheori (GM) whistles.
Bear Soup Guy: WE'RE FLOATING IN MID-AIR
Ganelon: Someone move the sphinx to the map layer so that we may finally be rid of it!
Frezak (GM): I could bury it in the void!
Apheori (GM): The villain of this campaign is the sphinx, isn't it?
How did this happen?
Bear Soup Guy: Cats are evil
Ganelon: A long campaign of casual oppression.
Frezak (GM): By it being consistently harmful.
Ganelon: I never want to own a cat.
But I'll gladly exploit my neighbours' ownership of cats and play with the friendly ones.
Apheori (GM): I guess that works.
Are we missing Gaarav?
Ganelon: I don't see his name. 'Course, that doesn't always mean something.
Apheori (GM): Should we go without him?
Frezak (GM): Don't we need our godsworn?
Since that was a requirement when assembling this band of neer-do-wells?
Apheori (GM): Well, maybe.
Ganelon: Hazz did help us with the whole language barrier thing.
Frezak (GM): We don't know that.
We know that we got language, and that Rhu said it was Hazz.
Gravy could have said that he rubbed magic dirt on people to do it.
Gaurav: It was Hazz.
Frezak (GM): And the only difference would be bluff checks.
SO YOU SAY
Gaurav: Everything is Hazz if you think aobut it long enough.
Apheori (GM): But he didn't say that.
Gaurav: or him. Or Him. I don't really know.
Apheori (GM): Everything is Hazz, indeed.
Ganelon: Maybe Radek has just been casting that ritual on everyone at night.
Gaurav: haha
hence the late nights
I kind of thought the people in the town spoke whatever we speak, unlike the people in the village.
It wasn't Hazz though.
It happened around the porridge?
Apheori (GM): Why would Radek deceive you all into thinking gods did it?
Gaurav: NO wait it was Hazz! We went back to the bar and got drunk. That's when it happened. That was right after we lost Azariphale.
Well, misplaced.
Ganelon: Gone like airport luggage.
Gaurav: He'll be back. Rhu has faith.
Apheori (GM): Misplaced your paladin? Get a replacement as Bob's Luggage Emporium!
Ganelon: "Sorry, our paladin stock's pretty low at the moment. You could try digging around, I guess, but be careful - they don't all serve Good gods."
Gaurav: What is more useful, a stick-up-their-ass by-the-rules doer of goody-too-shoes magic or a nice well-made valise?
Frezak (GM): We need a Paladin of Hoar.
Ganelon: Every campaign needs a Paladin of Hoar.
Apheori (GM): Hoar?
Gaurav: "Hoar Construction is a privately held heavy construction company specializing in commercial and industrial buildings, health care, and retail construction"
Apheori (GM): Sounds like ikipedia.
Gaurav: I don't get the reference. Maybe you need to be from Birmingham.
Apheori (GM): w
Ganelon: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hoar_%28Forgotten_Realms%29
This Hoar.
Apheori (GM): What's it god of?
Ganelon: God of... justice?
Apheori (GM): Oh.
Bear Soup Guy: Sounds like a charming fellow...
Ganelon: He's real big on giving people what they deserve.
Gaurav: Poetic justice, it says.
Apheori (GM): Also y'all just picked up a box of danger, you're headed to a college, and stuff.
GO.
Ganelon: Following the spirit of the law and not the letter.
Apheori (GM): Spirit takes too much thinking.
Frezak (GM): We can't go.
We have no world.
Ganelon: He's a god. He's got the time.
Apheori (GM): He'd probably kill himself atthe sight of wikipedia.
Frezak (GM): We need a GM to tell us what the world is.
Rhu asks Dave what the deal was with the priest back there
Apheori (GM): You're in a street. Rhu is chatting up Dave.
Amadi is currently not around.
Gaurav: It's Coffle, the seat of Deslan. There are policemen everywhere.
Apheori (GM): There is a sphinx sitting in front of the Gravedigger.
Random passersby are passing you by.
Guards are standing around.
There are uninteresting buildings.
Gaurav: There's no such thing. Except in Singapore.
Apheori (GM): You were headed in a direction.
Ganelon: Radek is having some small difficulties carrying both his shielding artifact and box of explosives, but damnit, none of you are taking either away from him.
Gaurav: Are Dave and the Mouseforged still on the disk? Carrying heavy things is what it's for, after all.
Frezak (GM): I will carry Radek, then.
Ganelon: Dave is not heavy.
Dave makes some excuse at Rhu and then hastily offers to help Radek.
Radek: Absolutely not!
Can't trust any of you with something this important.
Dave: You trust them with you.
The Gravedigger: That hurts, man.
Dave: And if there is no you, would anything be important anymore?
Gaurav: I don't think I did so earlier, so I'm going to roll a religion check to see what I know about the priests of Kyrule.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+8 religion check, priests of Kyrule
(
20
)
+8
=
28
Apheori (GM): You don't know anything.
Except what you saw.
Ellemerr: Hah.
Gaurav: Just practicing rolling 20s.
Rhu: (to Griebel) Do you still have any of that mushroom I nibbled on right before I led you all to a powerful portal with tentacles in it?
Radek: That depends on whether I have the potential to fix the universe or not.
Greibel grins widely
Ganelon: Obviously not a response to Rhu.
Dave: Do you?
Greibel pulls out a handful of mushroom
Dave takes one.
The sphinx stares at Gravy.
Radek: We won't know until I succeed now, will we?
Rhu: (to Dave) That's ... dangerous stuff. I don't think you should try it, given your propensity to fly into walls and die and whatnot.
Radek: Also, I can't recommend that you eat that.
Dave: Why?
What would happen?
Rhu: (to Greibel) Do you know what it is? You tried some, but you didn't go all ... you know ... crazy.
Radek: The last time Rhu did, he brought the cat back with him.
The Gravedigger: Rhu, I think Greibel is just crazy anyways.
No offense, Greibel.
Dave looks at the sphinx.
Rhu: (to Dave) Well, I went mad and led everybody to a Hole with tentacles on the other end, which lead to a beach and then a darkness and then a city of the dead? I stood face to face with my Lord Hazz'ridan, but I also brought a sphinx back, so I figure it evens out.
Dave looks at the mushroom.
Greibel: It's a hallucinogen. I (glances at Gravy)... I'm just more accustomed to these sorts of things.
Dave plops it into her mouth.
Rhu steps away from Dave
Amadi: So was the good thing seeing ol' Hazz, or getting the sphinx back?
The Gravedigger: Oh dear.
Amadi falls into step beside Rhu.
Rhu: (to Greibel) Hallucinogens don't usually compel you to find a Hole, though.
Dave picks up the sphinx.
Dave: KITTTY!
Greibel: Well...the good ones do!
Greibel laughs too loudly
Rhu: Huh.
Dave: Would you know? Do you try them often?
I certainly don't know. Never tried a sky before.
Is it supposed to swirl?
The Gravedigger sighs.
The Gravedigger: I'll just... uh.... head on to the college...
Greibel: If the sky is swirling, then yes, it's supposed to swirl.
Rhu: Where I grew up, it .. wasn't hard to help yourself to medicines that you maybe shouldn't have had. I gave up when I left, though.
Radek: Yes, please. Take us to the college.
Dave: The the current situation defines the intent?
Rhu: (to Amadi) Seeing my Lord in all his glory, definitely. Wasn't expecting the tentacles, though.
Amadi: You people never do.
Greibel: The current situation defines...the purpose, yes.
Dave pets the sphinx and contents herself to follow on the disk without saying anything further.
Rhu: In the temples I've seen, we usually represent him as a point in space and time. A fixed point. A final ending.
(looks at Dave) Are you seeing colours around people? That's what I saw. That was right before I went mad.
Dave: Of course.
Gaurav: Please feel free to stop me chattering as soon as we get to the college.
Amadi: Did you see the colours before the 'shroom, though?
Dave: They swirl through time and space...
They're blurrier now.
Gaurav: Rhu can talk to crazy ladies all day and all night.
The Gravedigger picks up Radek
Dave: Words are... um.
Blurry.
Too.
Rhu: Huh. I didn't see colours until after the mushrooms. (to Greibel) Did you see any colours? Well ... any *more* colours?
Apheori (GM): What kind of college did I say this was?
Nevermind.
Y'all approach an ominous-looking tower.
More ominous in that it's horribly ugly than anything else, though.
Gaurav: Does it remind me of any of the towers I saw in/around the City of the Dead?
Apheori (GM): There's a wall around stuff at the base (probably the actual campus).
No.
It's just really ugly.
Well, actually, it might remind you of a fee.
few.
Because ugly.
Gaurav: The only thing we know about the college from the logs is that the policemen referred to it as "the College".
Dave: No, not really.
Apheori (GM): And now you know it either has a really ugly tower, or you got bad directions.
Gaurav: Why did we want to go to the college again?
again -> cos I've forgotten, not "for a second time"
Apheori (GM): Because answers and people who know things!
Amadi walks into and through Dawn and disappears.
Apheori (GM): And magic.
Dave blinks.
Gaurav: Dawn?
If Hazz'ridan doesn't have the answers, any answers these so-called Collegians have must be flawed or wrong or stupid.
Frezak (GM): Dawn.
Apheori (GM): Dave is probably more Dawn than Dave.
(To Gaurav): YOU DOUBT?
Ellemerr: Dave-not-Dave
Rhu: Of course not, my Lord. I just think the answer is to be found in the Holes, or the laboratory, or with that ... thing Radek found. Books might be interesting but this is pretty darn unprecedented, I think.
Unless ... maybe the people from the lab had dealings with the College?
Gaurav: Any time Rhu mentions the lab he talks softly so that only the party can hear him.
Hazz'ridan: Answers will be given to questions never asked.
You will find them, and find their ends.
Frezak (GM): At least he isn't CREEPY
Apheori (GM): Everyone else ignore that. I forgot to whisper.
Gaurav: Answers to questions never asked is what I'm afraid of.
Rhu: Answers to questions never asked is what I'm afraid of.
Rhu nods at thin air.
Rhu: Yes, dead ends. Good.
Rhu motions to the College
Greibel glances at Rhu
Rhu: Should we go in?
Greibel: Sure you didn't take one of these?
Rhu smiles pleasantly at Greibel
Dave: He's talking to his stars.
Rhu: Oh no, I'm fine, thanks. No drugs for me.
Dave: Tentacles?
Singularities don't have...
Rhu: Oh! That. Yes. Sorry. Hazz'ridan The Magnificent wanted a word. He seems to think the College is a good idea. There might be questions there. Or answers. Or both?
(to Dave) See?! That's what *I'm* saying.
Frezak (GM): I'll plod up to the doors.
Well.
Actually, Radek should.
Rhu: Take your torches off your horns first.
Apheori (GM): The doors are shut.
There's no sign of anyone around tem.
Frezak (GM): Locked?
Apheori (GM): them
Frezak (GM): Or just closed?
Apheori (GM): Locked.
Rhu: Huh. Is there a passing town guard?
Apheori (GM): They're around, but not by the doors.
Frezak (GM): NO GUARDS?
THIS PLACE MUST BE CURSED
On fallow ground, no guards will grow.
Gaurav: They must have salted the ground. Bastards.
Rhu walks over to the closest guard. "Excuse me", he says, "but do you know why the College is locked?"
Apheori (GM): The guard shrugs and says, "They do their own thing."
Rhu: (to Guard) Huh. Do you know how we could get their attention?
Guard: Knock?
Rhu: ...
Guard: I don't know.
Frezak (GM): RADEEEEEK
Rhu: I'll try that then. Thanks, guard!
Rhu knocks on the door
Ganelon: I'm not arguing with this door until I walk through it.
Guard watches worriedly.
Apheori (GM): The door seems almost to buzz as you touch it.
Ganelon: ...Arcane buzzing?
Frezak (GM): BEES?
Ganelon: Or is he about to be engulfed in bees?
Frezak (GM): OPEN YOUR MOUTH
GET AS MANY AS YOU CAN IN THERE
Rhu: Um.
This door is buzzing?
Apheori (GM): Gan: Yes.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+8 religion check to detect a religious cause for the door-buzzing
(
14
)
+8
=
22
Apheori (GM): It reminds you of something.
Kiria's wrath.
Ganelon: ...What?
Or who?
Gaurav: What?
Apheori (GM): Reminds Rhu of Kiria's wrath.
Frezak (GM): Angry hornets.
Apheori (GM): Gan: You should check it out.
Ganelon: Sure thing.
rolling 1d20+11
(
10
)
+11
=
21
Gaurav kind of shrugs confusedly at the door
Gaurav: Sorry, Rhu
Apheori (GM): Gan: It's definitely magic. Some sort of puzzle lock.
Frezak (GM): BOMBS
Rhu: Maybe we should try spiders again? It worked pretty well the last time we were up against a locked door.
Ganelon: A puzzle, huh
Is there anything on the door itself that could be manipulated to solve said puzzle?
Bear Soup Guy: Redstone!
Apheori (GM): Well, the door is buzzing.
Rhu: If this is like any college I've ever been too, there'll be undergrads in the closest bar who could let us in?
Frezak (GM): I have shovels, no picks.
Despite picks being an invaluable digging instrument
Gaurav: Actually, nix that last. Rhu's never been to college.
Ganelon: Does it buzz differently at different points on the door's surface?
Apheori (GM): It's the heaviest in the centre, less so away from it.
(To Greibel): It's covered in bees.
Greibel: O_O
AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH! BEEEEEEEEEES!
Greibel runs around flailing
Radek: Shut up!
This is some sort of puzzle.
Gaurav: Can you tell us more about the Wrath of Kiria?
Ganelon: Either the wrath or Kiria would be appreciated, yes.
Dave: (Still sitting on the mouseforged and not really paying a whole lot of attention to anything) Beees.
Frezak (GM): Kiria's domain is Angry Hornets.
Greibel: Some kind of hymenoptera puzzle
Frezak (GM): I tihnk bees are are a consequence of a puzzle, not a part of it.
Smearing the doors with honey and/or pollen is unlikely to open it.
Bear Soup Guy: Of course not. If you smeared the door with the honey they'd stay right where they are!
Rhu: (shouts over the wall) OY! ANYBODY IN THERE?
Frezak (GM): And then they'd be trapped!
Rhu: WE BRING THE SECRETS OF THE UNIVERSE!
Frezak (GM): And we could open the door in safety!
Greibel: AND BEES!
The Gravedigger: AND I KNOW A LOT ABOUT SHOVELS
Rhu: Greibel: can you speak ... bee?
Bear Soup Guy: CAN I SPEAK BEE?
Rhu: You can speak in the tongue of many living things. Perhaps you can calm the door down?
Apheori (GM): Roll nature to speak bee.
Bear Soup Guy: What a lovely sentence
rolling 1d20+12 bee speak
(
14
)
+12
=
26
Frezak (GM): YOU TELL THAT FUKKEN DOOR
Gaurav: That IS a beautiful sentence.
Apheori (GM): You listen to the bees and discover that they're not supposed to be there, not actually there, and don't want to be there.
Bear Soup Guy: Can I help them to get away?
Ganelon: Might as well ask.
Gaurav: Guys, I know we reanimated a broken mouse soul in the body of a golem, but I think negotiating with guard bees might now be the coolest thing we've done in this campaign.
Frezak (GM): Greibel is gonna steal the show.
I have to do something cooler than useing grapnels to hunt deerbeast from a flying car, now.
Greibel: LISTEN TO ME, BEES!
Bzzzzzzzzzz bzzzzzzzzzz bzzzzzzzzzzzz
Gaurav: Frezak: you did charge a sphinx with torches tied to your horns
Ganelon: We've all had our moments.
Rhu stares at a buzzing Greibel, surprised, confused and impressed
Apheori (GM): The door buzzes louder, confused, but it doesn't really seem to understand that there is something outside talking to it.
Rhu: IF YOU DON'T LET US IN WE'LL REPORT YOU TO THE SPCA
Greibel: I forgot something
Bees don't really talk
Rhu: They can dane
dance*
Greibel: Yes, quite gracefully at that
Radek: Would you like me to blast the thing off its hinges?
Greibel: I don't think they're going to give us much trouble
Frezak (GM): I could... uh... shout at it?
Greibel: Somehow I think blowing up a public college door in the middle of town would attract some unwanted attention
Rhu: It's clearly not public, but that might make it worse.
Maybe it's a College of Trappist Monks?
Frezak (GM): And this place IS full of guards.
Radek: Hrmph.
Rhu: They do not speak. They only buzz.
Frezak (GM): Have we knocked?
Greibel: Trappists have beer.
We must find out!
Rhu: This ... isn't a high wall. Maybe we could go over? Or go back and get CAR?
CAR is going to run out of power at some point, though.
But it could get us straight up to that tower, should that be desirable. It'll probably scare that guard army they have, though.
Also, there were philosophers around? Maybe they know how to get into the college?
Amadi pops up as on cue.
Ellemerr: (I had a phone call. >.> )
Greibel buzzes at Amadi
Amadi buzzes back.
Greibel smiles
Greibel: It's okay, she's not a bee illusion!
Dave slides off the disk and lies on the ground.
Rhu: Can bees create illusions? That would be pretty creepy.
Greibel: Whatever put them in that door might be able to
Amadi: Bees can be pretty amazing. Are there bees?
Greibel points to the door
Rhu looks down at Dave -- "are you okay?"
Amadi: Is there honey?
Greibel: Maybe! Inside the door.
Amadi looks at the door, cocks her head to one side and steps forth. Then, after only the tiniest of hesitation, she licks the door.
Rhu: Where there are bees, there must be honey. It's only natural. Although these might be angry hornets?
Greibel: Nah it's cool. They're bees.
Amadi: Deh ang'iest. Mm, 'dis good.
Dave: You were right.
Amadi steps away from the door.
Amadi: I'm never right.
Dave: Was not as right as you were.
Amadi: Well, neither of us are.
Dave: Full of bees.
Rhu: Hey, do you know anything about the Wrath of Kiria, do you?
Amadi: Sure. It hurts.
Rhu: Is there ... can we ... (motions at the door and the tower)
If this isn't getting anywhere, I propose we head back to town adn get lunch.
(From Ellemerr): Should I help?
Amadi: Lunch is good!
(To Ellemerr): With what?
(From Ellemerr): The door, dear.
(From Ellemerr): Or do you want them to... something. I dunno.
Gaurav: Gan? Frezak? Any ideas?
Ganelon: I don't know how to negotiate with bees.
I could try picking the lock, maybe, but there's guards around.
Frezak (GM): Did we knock?
Ellemerr: Do they seem to care?
(To Amadi): Oh.
Ganelon: I think we knocked.
Gaurav: I knocked. That's when I noticed the door was buzzing.
Ganelon: And I think they care.
(To Ellemerr): You can totally open it, yell "AGH! BEES!" and pull out a beehive. And then throw it in the nearest garbage bin.
Bear Soup Guy: Well that last guard didn't seem to care much
Gaurav: Maybe we could do some kind of demonstration of magic? One idea would be to come back with CAR, but maybe something wizz-bangy to attract their attention?
Frezak (GM): I'll give the door a Gravy pounding.
Amadi looks hungrily at the door.
Frezak (GM): MEET FRAVY FIST
gorram
frubleurble
(To Amadi): Unfortunately Dave is way too stoned to do anything like that at the moment.
(To Ellemerr): Which is kind of sad because she'd have to be a bit stoned to do it in the first place.
(From Ellemerr): Heh...
(To Ellemerr): That would be right out of Invader Zim.
(From Ellemerr): I'll let Frezak punch it first. I don't want to just do things for them. Not if they seem to have ideas of their own.
(To Ellemerr): Excellent.
Apheori (GM): You punch the door?
Rhu: That might piss off the bees, but I don't suppose we have any alternatives.
I wonder if the underground lab connects to the college in any way.
Amadi: There's always alternatives.
Frezak (GM): Well, I pound on it.
Ganelon: I'll keep my distance.
Apheori (GM): Roll a pound.
Strength.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+5
(
2
)
+5
=
7
Jesus.
Why the hells do I NEVER ROLL STR.
Gaurav: You need to stop trying to hit things and just try to sit on them instead.
Apheori (GM): You pound the door noisily and some dust flakes down.
Amadi catches some of the dust on her tongue.
Amadi: Mmm...
Apheori (GM): The sphinx is sitting on Dave's head.
Like that?
It tastes like honey and aspirin.
The dust.
Rhu: Are you ... hungry?
Amadi: This is good snow. Make more!
Gaurav: No response to the pounding?
The Gravedigger: Oh, sod it.
Let's go have lunch.
Amadi pokes Gravy. "Make more! Please?"
Rhu: Maybe we should leave a note?
The Gravedigger looks down at Amadi.
The Gravedigger: Okay, but if someone comes shouting, i'm blaming you.
The Gravedigger turn around and punches the door.
Frezak (GM): SUPER GRAVY SAYAN
Apheori (GM): Roll again.
Ganelon: We're having dust sandwiches!
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+5
(
15
)
+5
=
20
Ganelon: Great headache relief!
Rhu: You can have the dust sandwiches. I'll wait for something juicier.
Apheori (GM): You here something click as more dust comes down.
hear
Amadi grins.
Amadi: Mead is juicy, right?
Rhu: ... yes?
Frezak (GM): A click?
Are wtalking breaking knuckles?
Ganelon: Clicking. Could be good, or very bad.
Apheori (GM): The door clicked.
Gaurav: Better than a sullen door, whatever it is.
Ganelon: Could I inspect the thing for changes?
Apheori (GM): Do it.
Rhu is rapidly losing interest and looking around for somewhere to get lunch.
Apheori (GM): And roll something.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+20
(
6
)
+20
=
26
Gravy Investigations
Amadi leans a hand heavily on the door, but stands reluctantly aside to let Radek and Gravy inspect it. She gathers some dust.
Ganelon: Well that's perception.
I'll do Arcana.
rolling 1d20+11
(
19
)
+11
=
30
Gaurav: woo!
Ganelon: Niice.
Gaurav: all the magicks
Frezak (GM): My rolls!
It's you!
Apheori (GM): Gravy finds that the door is no longer locked.
Radek finds a beeive.
beehive
Rhu turns around
Rhu: Oh hey, you got it open!
Ganelon: I say...
Send in the porridge first.
Frezak (GM): ELDRITCH BEES
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You saw a pub on the corner nearby.
Ganelon: It is well suited to combat angry bees.
Gaurav: YES
The Gravedigger: I engineered it.
Apheori (GM): Radek: You are holding a beehive in your hands for some reason.
It is covered in bees.
Rhu: BE RIGHT BACK
Rhu returns in a few minutes carrying a greasy meaty sandwhich
Radek remains motionless.
Radek: Someone remove these bees from my hands at once.
Gaurav: Are we going to send in the porridge first? I really want to see the sentence "The porridge investigates."
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Rhu: (to Radek) ... why are you carrying a beehive?
Frezak (GM): I'm sure my shovel can dispatch the hand-walking bees while leaving you unscathed.
Amadi looks hungrily at the sandwich, then takes something that looks sort of like a tap out of... a pocket? And jams it into the door. She produces tea cups from somewhere else and fills them with a golden liquid, handing it out to anyone who'll accept one.
Frezak (GM): I will drink that shit up.
Ganelon: ...Is it sap or honey?
Dave flails a bit from under the sphinx.
Rhu: No thanks, I prefer my food corporeal.
Ellemerr: It should be mead, though probably not the best mead.
Rhu: I might go get another sandwich after this one, it's good! Let me know if I should bring you back one.
Ellemerr: It'll probably taste strangely of wood and painkillers.
Amadi: Please and thank you.
Radek: Allow me to repeat myself.
Someone remove these bees, from my hands, at once.
Frezak (GM): SWEET PICKLE JUICE
Amadi picks up the beehive.
The Gravedigger: Don't loot at me.
I'm not a beesman.
Amadi buzzes.
Rhu: Anybody else want sandwiches?
(From Amadi): "Thank you, kind bees, for your sacrifice. 'Tis delicious."
Gaurav: I don't suppose anyone else has notice that we've opened the door?
Amadi: Sandwiches!
Apheori (GM): BEEEES.
Frezak (GM): What, you mean the guards?
They're probably not allowed to guard.
Apheori (GM): The guards are watching surrepticiously.
Gaurav: Guards, anyone outside, anyone inside. I guess we were pretty quiet doing it, but I'm surprised that they were relying on one lock and one beehive.
No dogs, no guard, nobody out in the yard, &c.
Apheori (GM): Have you opened it?
Ellemerr: I've made mead run from it. That's it.
Frezak (GM): Who will make the first step?
Rhu: I will.
To the pub. For more sandwiches. Nobody else?
Rhu returns in a mo' with sandwiches for himself and Amadi
The Gravedigger: I'm good, thanks.
Rhu: Here you go, Mrs. Teatime.
Ganelon: Do bees linger upon my hands?
Bear Soup Guy: That pub has super service
Amadi: Oh, great.
Amadi refills her teacup and has a great lunch.
Gaurav: I guess maybe they were busier when their biggest neighbours didn't lock their door and guard it with bees?
Must be spring break.
(To Rhu): There were other folks there. Did you talk to any about anything?
Apheori (GM): Radke: The bees come off your hands.
Gaurav: I vote Gravy goes first, with Radek after to talk smart if necessary.
(From Gaurav): Naah, just grinned the grin of a man who hasn't had a decent burger in a while but looks forward to one. Unless someone asked Rhu anything, he'd just have nodded and smiled.
Amadi juggles the beehive with her teacup and a bit of the sandwich that she didn't eat.
Ganelon: Oh good.
(To Rhu): Tsk.
Ganelon: I was going to enact a convoluted plan whereby I use my beard to remove them.
(From Gaurav): burgers come first, adventuring a distant second
Ganelon: Thus becoming Beebeard.
Frezak (GM): I do have a meaty shell.
Apheori (GM): Dave has stopped flailing under the sphinx.
Rhu: (to Greibel) Man, you can speak to bees, huh? That is awesome.
Greibel shrugs
Amadi: It'd be better if they ever said something sensible back.
Frezak (GM): Talent!
Greibel: What she said
(From Rhu): my base perception is 22, so if something jumped out at me, I'd've responded?
Amadi: Can't even say "you're welcome" like civilized horses.
Ganelon: I'll make an effort to get the sphinx off of Dave.
Amadi: But their gifts are appreciated nonetheless.
Rhu takes several steps back from Radek and the sphinx
Ganelon: By using my rifle stock as a lever to pry it off of her from a fair distance.
Frezak (GM): Your hands are full, Gan.
With bombs and shields.
Ganelon: And formerly bees, apparently.
Rhu: Amadi: maybe you're NOT welcome? You are stealing their food, after all.
Amadi shrugs.
Ganelon: I'll have to set those things down, then. Very close to me.
Well.
Okay, I don't set the artifact down.
Amadi: In that case they aren't complaining like angry hornets.
So either way...
Gaurav: "A fair distance" for a sphinx is, like, on the other side of a decently-sized ocean.
Ganelon: It might protect me from the sphinx.
Apheori (GM): How do grabs work?
As in you're trying to undo a grab with your rifle.
On someone else.
Ganelon: That would be an escape attempt.
So, athletics vs. fortitude or acrobatics vs. reflex.
Apheori (GM): Dave already gave up.
Ganelon: Well, as an outside party...
A bull rush is strength vs. fortitude to push a thing.
Frezak (GM): I can do that.
Rhu puts a hand on his maul
Ganelon: And you can push things out of grabbing distance of their targets, automatically breaking the grab.
Frezak (GM): I don't get racial bonuses to Bull rush, sadly.
Apheori (GM): Strength, then, from the scrawny old man!
Ganelon: Oh boy oh boy
Frezak (GM): I'll sublty assist, if I can.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20-1+1
(
7
)
-1+1
=
7
Frezak (GM): LOOK AT THOSE NOODLY ARMS GO
Apheori (GM): Yeah, that doesn't work.
Ganelon: I could push it off with magic too, but that's trouble.
It would do damage.
Gaurav: Does Devourer kill him?
Apheori (GM): It looks up at him grumpily.
You know the look when you push a cat without moving it.
Amadi misplaces her juggling... things.
Frezak (GM): Dude, I smacked it about before.
It's an invincicat
Radek: Hmph.
You win this time, cat.
Amadi: It's not a cat.
Rhu: That was a lovely sandwich. Should we go in and check out this college?
Radek: Yes, please.
Greibel: Time to learn!
Apheori (GM): Leave Dave, the sphinx, and the mouseforged outside, then?
Amadi takes Dawn's hand, hands her the remains of her sandwich and the fragile teacup she dropped, and then arm-walks her along.
Apheori (GM): Dave is prone on the ground with a sphinx on her head.
What is arm-walking?
Ganelon: I'm really going to have to make a mouse body for that thing.
And arm it well.
Frezak (GM): A giant mouse-body.
Ganelon: Many defensive countermeasures.
Frezak (GM): A warmouse.
With cannons.
Rhu: oh YES
Ganelon: Well, it's gonna need them to repel sphinxes.
Ellemerr: I forgot the part about dragging her to her feet. And I don't know. It's... walking arm-in-arm. Possibly. I'm not intending to take the sphinx off her head.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Rhu: That pub with the great sandwiches probably knows where to find a rat or two. Food and all that. But the college might have proper surgical equipment. Of some sort.
Ellemerr: I'm really tired and sort of sorry if I make less sense than usual. I'll have to leave you soon.
Apheori (GM): The sphinx is very unhappy about this and is now clinging to her head with legs and wings wrapped around it.
Ellemerr: Perfect.
Apheori (GM): Dave just sort of goes where Amadi pulls her.
Gaurav: But Dave is upright and walking?
Apheori (GM): Aye.
Ellemerr: Amadi is sort of just following Greibel and Rhu.
Gaurav: Awesome. Let's go! Gravy leading?
Frezak (GM): Absolutely.
Ganelon: I don't need an organic rat body to make a warmouse.
Just time and materials.
Rhu: (to Gan) o_0
Apheori (GM): The humanoid body is full of materials.
Rhu: OOC much?
Ganelon: Yes it is.
Apheori (GM): Or...
Ganelon: Why would I need an organic body to make a sentient golem?
Apheori (GM): I dunno.
Ganelon: They don't power those things with actual hearts.
Apheori (GM): Amadi might.
Ganelon: Usually.
Gaurav: So we open the door and enter within.
Amadi: (to Dave) You have a mushroom inside.
Frezak (GM): That sounds horrifying.
Ganelon: "Don't exhale or the spores will escape."
"And we will all be doomed."
Gaurav: We're all already doomed.
Apheori (GM): It's a college campus wit buildings and trees and crap and nobody outside but a gardener, despite it being a really nice day.
The gardener ignores you.
Dave starts flailing again and bats at the sphinx.
Frezak (GM): You're infected with Red Longman.
You are doomed to only speak in limericks, lest you awaken the parasite within you.
Someone with charisma go chat up the gardenator
Gaurav: HA
Apheori (GM): You mean Amadi?
Gaurav: I think that's Greibel? Mine's -1.
Amadi: (to sphinx) I think you're making Dawn uncomfortable.
Bear Soup Guy: lol charisma
Apheori (GM): The sphinx says nothing, but looks horribly uncomfortable and freaked out as well.
Amadi: You might want to reconsider your current placement.
Apheori (GM): It's too tense to let go.
Ganelon: I could talk to him, but you know it won't involve charisma.
This is my offer.
Amadi looks a little annoyed.
Gaurav: I think Radek should go. A college gardner is probably used to being condescended to be superintelligent people.
by*
Ellemerr: I have tons of charisma. I'm full of words.
I do not promise you'd get anything useful out of the conversation.
Amadi picks up the sphinx by the scruff of its neck and holds it before her face, still looking annoyed.
Bear Soup Guy: lol Gaurav
Frezak (GM): Amadi has charisma but is also batshit.
Gravy could... share shovelliar insight, that's about it.
Gaurav: Maybe if we send Amadi first, anybody else will look better in comparison?
Apheori (GM): Amadi: You wind up picking up both the sphinx and Dave.
Gaurav: We could also just ignore him and walk into one of the buildings.
Ganelon: Naaaah.
Amadi looks frustrated.
Radek: You there! Caretaker!
Amadi puts them both down.
Apheori (GM): But the sphinx now looks somewhat uncertain as well as freaked out.
Gaurav: Greibel: do you speak sphinx?
Gardener: Hmm?
Frezak (GM): Gravy will of course plod behind Radek should the latter have to approach the gardeniser
Amadi gives the sphinx a last stern look and walks over to see what the others are doing. She makes a sort of "Ooo"-ing face, without the sound, at seeing the gardener.
Rhu hang back and looks around the garden, but stays close enough to Gravy and Radek to intercede if combat becomes necessary.
Radek: Is this the college?
Apheori (GM): Mmm hmm.
Gardener: Mmm hmm.
Radek: What do they study here?
Gardener: Hmm hhmhhm.
Radek: Other than... beekeeping.
Gardener shrugs.
Radek: ...
Frezak (GM): I love how on top of things Rhu is.
Amadi: The plants here. Did you plant them? Can you remember planting them?
Gardener: Mmhm.
Amadi: Seriously? That's... huh. And did they sprout?
Gardener: Hmm mmm.
Radek looks back to Gravy.
Radek: Utter nonsense.
Amadi: Yes, yes, go on, please.
Gardener shrugs.
Gaurav: Are there any birds in this garden?
Are they mutated?
Apheori (GM): No birds.
Amadi: Pleeeease? I'll trade you a stick!
Gaurav: Flowers?
Gardener: Hmm mm.
Apheori (GM): Roses.
Trees.
Grass.
Rhu is distracted by a tree.
Amadi: Well, they're plants and full of dirt. Of course they would have bugs. But what about the... you know.
Frezak (GM): TEETH?
Amadi mimes something incomprehensible.
The Gravedigger: What do you want to do? Just wander around?
Gaurav: Head to the tower? Or one of the buildings?
Radek: In search of someone who speaks in /words/? Yes, that sounds acceptable.
Gaurav: we shold get Griebel to turn into a flock of undergrads and go investigate
Gardener: Hmm mmm hmm.
Frezak (GM): He can do maggots?
Gardener points toward a compost heap.
Amadi looks delighted, and hands the gardener a stick.
Amadi: Oh, thank you, thank you!
Amadi runs towards the compost heap.
Gardener: Mmmhmm!
(From Ellemerr): I have no idea what I'm doing :D But it's fun!
Rhu: I think Mrs. Teatime has made a new friend. Should we warn him that she tends to disappear occasionally?
(To Ellemerr): Same!
(To Ellemerr): Not having to come up with content simplifies things so much.
Gardener goes back to what he was doing.
The Gravedigger: I don't think that would phase him.
Bear Soup Guy: brb
Rhu: Fair enough. To the tower?
Amadi dives into the compost pile and gets buried.
Rhu looks around
Rhu: Did Mrs. Teatime disappear again?
(From Ellemerr): She did, but you don't have to spring it yet. I'll be brushing teeth and stuff and go to bed, but I'm keeping and eye on you for another ten min.
The Gravedigger: Magic.
Yeah, let's go.
Apheori (GM): She ran off to the compost.
Ganelon: To the tower, then.
Apheori (GM): So... you can dig after her.
If you'd like.
Apheori (GM) wants to see Rhu try to convnce Gravy to dig through a heap of rotting stff.
Ellemerr: Heee
Gaurav: HA
How's Dave doing? We'll need Amadi to move Dave if Dave can't move herself.
Ellemerr: I gave the sphinx a stern look, but I'm not sure it helped.
Apheori (GM): Dave still has a sphinx attached to her head.
Ellemerr: And she's full of mushroom, but it's not plugging up her holes.
... I think.
Maybe some of them, but not properly.
Ganelon: I don't think the sphinx is manning the controls.
Gaurav: Yeah, but is she on her feet? If she can walk, we can leave Amadi behind and let her catch up once she's done composting.
Apheori (GM): She's on the ground again.
Bear Soup Guy pictures Amadi playing in the compost like a child in a ball pit
Gaurav: Sigh.
Ellemerr: Heee
Rhu sighs.
Rhu turns to Gravy, points at Dave, then points at the manure.
Gaurav: And looks very unhappy doing it.
Maybe we could get Dave on the disk somehow?
I don't want to leave her behind, given that Amadi will probably pop out of existence sooner or later.
The Gravedigger: You want me to WHAT?
Dig out the Sandwich Kid?
Rhu waves his hands around a bit, hunting for some sort of reasonable reason to do any such thing, but can't.
Rhu: We can't just leave Dave stuck beneath a sphinx, even if it will probably follow us. And we can't split the party.
You don't have to dig her out.
We could blow it up.
The Gravedigger: Oh, alright.
Frezak (GM): I'll start by.. uh... probing for tiny bards.
Gaurav: bards?
Apheori (GM): Probing?
Frezak (GM): Yeah.
Poking my shovel in the pile in a gentle fashion, in order to see whether I can find a hard, Amadi-sized lump.
Apheori (GM): Roll a thingy.
Frezak (GM): What thingy?
(From Gaurav): Sorry, did you say you wanted to see Rhu convince Gravy to dig through a heap of rotting stuff? Here you go.
Gaurav: NOT strength.
ANYTHING but strength.
Frezak (GM): Thanks >.>
Apheori (GM): Strength.
Gaurav: roll charisma
Frezak (GM): STRENGHT
Gentle strength.
Negastrength.
rolling 1D20+5
(
3
)
+5
=
8
Fucking hell.
I WANT A NEW CHARACTER
Frezak (GM): WHERE I DONT HAVE TO USE STR
Ellemerr: How about new dice? I'd trade. I don't know if mine can roll str, but it's worth a shot, and I'm not overly fond of them most of the time... Though they are very good at rolling okay when I need it the most.
Apheori (GM): You impale something.
Ellemerr: OW!
Gaurav: Amadi kebab.
Ellemerr: Tastes delicious, but you go quite mad after.
... But, uhm, I sort of have to go and sleep now. Sleeeeeep...
Bear Soup Guy: Goodnight and thanks for all the compost!
Gaurav: Haha, same!
Sleep well!
Amadi 's voice comes eerily out of the compost, stating that "The plant makes its own drangling."
Ellemerr: Sweet nightmares. :3
The Gravedigger: I'm not touching that again.
Rhu peers at the manure
Rhu: Where did that voice come from?
Apheori (GM): Dave will now start screaming from under the sphinx.
Greibel: Best not to take the warnings of dung lightly
Rhu: ...
Dave: (muffled screams) Help! Help! Get it off!
Rhu: Guys. I think we're going to have to attack the sphinx.
Greibel: Best news I've heard today
The Gravedigger: Ah, well.
Bear Soup Guy: brb bathroom
Gaurav: BSG: Ha, really? I thought you were okay with the sphinx!
Ganelon: Oh, I know.
Frezak (GM): I activate...
FORM OF THE FEARSOME RAM.
Ganelon: I use Thundering Armor on Dave.
Frezak (GM): Oh, right.
Yeah, do that.
Ganelon: Because we want the sphinx off her face before we attack it.
Apheori (GM): What does that do?
Gaurav: I think I have something that can push it off, possibly. Lemme check.
Ganelon: It's magic.
Like a... expanding forcefield around Dave.
Pushes a thing away from her and gives her some slight defenses.
The push is an attack.
Apheori (GM): It can
Gaurav: Naah, I didn't pick that power. Sorry.
Apheori (GM): t miss, can it?
Ganelon: It can miss.
Apheori (GM): The thing on her, that is?
Ganelon: In the sense that it's an attack against fortitude.
So the sphinx could resist the pushing but Dave would still get the armor bonus.
Apheori (GM): ...roll that, then. >.<
Gaurav: so we roll initiative after that attack?
Ganelon: [Implement Attack]
rolling 1d20+5+1+0
(
8
)
+5+1+0
=
14
Frezak (GM): really, Gan?
REALLY?
Apheori (GM): That does not get the sphinx off.
Ganelon: I tried.
Apheori (GM): Dave is flailing at it.
Initiative?
Frezak (GM): I'd love to.
Except my init sucks.
Gaurav:
rolling 1d20+3 initiative
(
15
)
+3
=
18
Bear Soup Guy: back!
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+1
(
2
)
+1
=
3
Gaurav: the sphinx will probably kill us all, but I'm not going to wait while it attacks (or .. appears to attack?) a party member
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+1
(
17
)
+1
=
18
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20+1
(
3
)
+1
=
4
Toooooooooooooo stoooooooooooooooooooooned
Gaurav: Should Dave roll also?
Apheori (GM): Dave and the sphinx are stuck to each other. Would this affect initiative, or just what they can do in their turns?
Ganelon: Just what they do.
Frezak (GM): It wouldn't affect initiative.
Gaurav: I don't suppose the mouseforged can help us at this time?
Apheori (GM): Naw.
Gaurav: Is it big enough to hide behind?
Apheori (GM): Sure.
Frezak (GM): THe porridge gets a turn? That's... worrying.
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Okay!
Bear Soup Guy: Porridge fight!
Apheori (GM): What did that thing Radek did do for Dave?
Ganelon: +1 AC until my turn ends.
My next turn.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Frezak (GM): Daaaave
You can do thi!
FIGHT FOR YOU LIIIIIFE
Gaurav: Go Dave Go!
Apheori (GM): Dave will try to pry the sphinx's jaws open.
...she fails.
NEXT.
Gaurav: Oof.
Frezak (GM): PORRIDGE
INVOKE DARK OATY POWERS
(To Greibel): Any ideas for the porridge? I've got nothing.
The porridge drips down Greibel's back.
(From Bear Soup Guy): Attempts to obscure the sphinx's sight with a cloud of brown sugar?
Gaurav: ew
Apheori (GM): Sensing something amiss, the porridge then sends out a cloud of something brown and sweet.
Frezak (GM): AT WHO
Apheori (GM): Just out.
It doesn't actually wind up doing anything. Just sells vaguely nice.
smells*
Gaurav: Porridge farts.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: Do something.
Greibel: At least you tried, buddy
Gaurav: Griebel: what's your HP like?
mine's 32, and I'm wondering whether to move in front of you so you can shoot from behind me, or if you'd be fine without anyone to guard you?
Ganelon: He's got a lot of constitution if I remember right.
Frezak (GM): I'll be guarding from in front.
I'll just mark the thing.
Ganelon: He's the kind of druid who can actually take hits when he goes all animal-mode.
Bear Soup Guy: Yeah, 35 HP, high Con
Gaurav: Sweet. Okay, I'll flank right.
Move: 3 squares
Minor: Oath of Enmity against the sphinx
Standard: Radiant vengeance. Divine, radiant, ranged attack.
Bear Soup Guy: I always picture that move as a Final Fantasy-style battle animation where Rhu takes out his Maul and points it at the enemy Babe Ruth style, as a lens flare flashes in the background
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+5 Wisdom vs Reflex
(
15
)
+5
=
20
Frezak (GM): There has to be a lens flare.
Even when we are underground.
Bear Soup Guy: Yes
Apheori (GM): Would being stuck impact its reflex?
Gaurav: oof, I think it's the other way around: prone means it's easier to hit melee and harder to hit ranged
other -> wrong
Apheori (GM): It's more grabbed than proned.
Ganelon: Nope.
Grabbed doesn't impact defenses, silly though that is.
Apheori (GM): ...weird.
Gaurav: huh. That is silly.
Apheori (GM): You miss.
Gaurav: DM: you can throw in a +2/-2 if you like.
Ugh.
Frezak (GM): It has more than 20 reflex?
Fuuuck.
Gaurav: Okay, I'm done.
Apheori (GM): It's a cat. What do you expect?
Gaurav: I'm just hoping that one of us survives.
Frezak (GM): I've seen my cat's reflexes.
Gaurav: GRAVY: go!
Frezak (GM): She couldn't outwit soup.
Gaurav: I have to leave for class in 50 mins.
Apheori (GM): That's wits, not reflex.
Gaurav: Your cat is not from the city of the dead.
Frezak (GM): My cat IS dead.
Gaurav: Actually, I'm kind of hoping we disentangle Dave from the sphinx and then work out some sort of surrender. Because this thing is probably ridiculously strong.
Frezak (GM): My turn?
Gaurav: Yup! I'm done.
Ganelon: We could just go all-out.
Summon the eyebot.
Frezak (GM): Gravy will activate Form of the Fearsome Ram.
Ganelon: Stuff like that.
Frezak (GM): Becoming mightier and faster.
And I will use the Fearsome Ram Attack.
rolling 1D20+7+2
(
8
)
+7+2
=
17
Vs Cat Fortitude.
Gaurav: Yeah, I'd like to take a turn to figure out what the sphinx is going to do, but then it's all encounters and dailys as I can.
Apheori (GM): You hit cat and dave.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 2D10+4
(
9
+
7
)
+4
=
20
Apheori (GM): Actually you mostly hit Dave, but there's a cat in the way.
Frezak (GM): And I slam the cat 3 sqaures and knock it prone.
Gaurav: *and Dave*?!
NICE!
Frezak (GM): what?
It's still attached?
Apheori (GM): They're stuck together. You hit both.
Yes.
Frezak (GM): Well.
Fuck.
THen all we can do is kill dave.
Apheori (GM): What kind of daage was that?
Frezak (GM): Shovel damage.
Apheori (GM): damage
Okay.
Frezak (GM): And they're both prone.
Gaurav: Radek can heal Dave from a distance, right?
Frezak (GM): And I will Mark the cat and end my tun.
Apheori (GM): What does mark do, again?
Frezak (GM): The cat has -2 to atttacks that don't include me, and I get to do stuff when it ignores that mark.
Ganelon: I can.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Frezak (GM): that's all from me
Apheori (GM): Remind me how escaping from a grab works?
And would you do that before or after trying to get up if proned as well?
Ganelon: It's a move action.
And you can do them in any order you want.
It takes a very specific sort of grabber to force people to get un-grabbed before they can stand up.
Gaurav: Are Dave's attacks mostly melee or ranged?
Apheori (GM): Depends on what she has in her hands.
Gaurav: Given the grab, it might make sense for Dave to delay her next action until right after the sphinxes. Then, if either of 'em can defeat the grab, she can use her turn to move away and get healed and whatever.
Apheori (GM): Okay, the sphinx successfully untangles itself at least somewhat.
And sort of gets up.
The sphinx is still on her, though.
Ganelon: If she's supposed to have an HP bar, I can't see it.
So it might be hard to tell how much she needs healing.
Apheori (GM): Can you see it now?
I dont really know what I'm doing.
Gaurav: Yes, it's now visible!
Apheori (GM): And the sphinx will take a whatever action to arch its back at Gravy and hiss.
Ganelon: Yeah, that worked.
Apheori (GM): Greibel!
Gaurav: Are they still grabbed to each other?
Apheori (GM): Kind of but not really.
Bear Soup Guy: hrrrrrrmmmm
Apheori (GM): As in it's still on her, but separation will be a lot easier now.
Gaurav: Cool.
Bear Soup Guy: So prone cat means ranged attacks don't do well right?
Apheori (GM): It got up. Don't worry about that.
Bear Soup Guy: oh right, okay
Apheori (GM): Do worry about hitting Dave too, though.
Maybe.
Frezak (GM): Don't you have a thing that prones marked guys?
Magic wolves or something.
Bear Soup Guy: I think so.
Frezak (GM): Giant cicadas?
Fey moose?
Bear Soup Guy: Oh no, it does extra damage to marked guys
Apheori (GM): MOOSE.
Bear Soup Guy: 1d6 extra in fact
Frezak (GM): Batsharkscorpionmoose
Gaurav: sweet!
Tusked mouse deers.
Frezak (GM): Dire Mousie.
Fey Duck.
Bear Soup Guy: oh it prones them by default and also does extra damage if marked
how sexy
Frezak (GM): niiice
Bear Soup Guy: now somebody tell me how bursts work http://i.gyazo.com/a226c6ae1445769d661978a0399c22a7.png
Gaurav: Goose with a chip on its shoulder.
You can hit up to 2 targets within 5 squares of you
Frezak (GM): Yeah
Gaurav: I think
Frezak (GM): And you don't provoke Opportunity attacks with that.
Bear Soup Guy: Cools
Frezak (GM): Wow, that's a really nice power.
Gaurav: "The Spirit Pack" sounds like a hippie backpack
Frezak (GM): What, he flings bags at people?
Bear Soup Guy: Does it damage allies as well?
XD
Frezak (GM): What, from fuuuumes?
Bear Soup Guy: oh wait one /or/ two
so it's targeted, okay
okay so uh
rolling 1d20+5
(
11
)
+5
=
16
vs cat reflex
Gaurav: Hey, so, it's 3pm, and I don't think we're going to finish by 3:30pm. If we run out of time, would anybody be interested in meeting again after 1.5 hours to finish this encounter?
We should immobilize the cat somehow. Its reflex is insane.
Frezak (GM): Ordinarily, I could, but I'll need to sleep. >.>
Bear Soup Guy: I'd love to but I might be busy
Gaurav: What about later this week sometime?
Bear Soup Guy: Friday would work for me
Ganelon: Any time's good for the Ganster.
Frezak (GM): I can do pretty much any day.
Apheori (GM): I suppose we can't all just show up again tomorrow.
Frezak (GM): Except saturday
I can do tomorrow.
Ganelon: Ditto.
Apheori (GM): Soup?
MAngo?
...mango soup?
Bear Soup Guy: Actually tomorrow is fine for me
Gaurav: I can go until 12:30pm MT tomorrow
but I can start at any time
and then I'm free again sometime between 2pm and 3pm tomorrow
Apheori (GM): So you can go until around when we usually start?
Gaurav: What about 10am MT tomorrow? An hour earlier than usual?
I have to leave at 12:30pm MT, which is 1.5 hours after we usually start.
so we'll have 2.5 hours and then can meet again nowish if we STILL aren't all dead
Apheori (GM): It usually takes us upwards of that long to get started, but given that it's one day between in this case it could work, aye.
What do the rest of you think?
Frezak (GM): Sure.
Bear Soup Guy: yeah I can probably drag myself out of bed before then
Gaurav: That's 1600 UTC to 1830 UTC tomorrow.
If that helps.
Gan?
Ganelon: I normally wake up like three hours before our usual start time
Gaurav: I would seriously consider skipping class today, but I've been skipping homework in order to finish my thesis proposal and I think my lecturer's a little pissed off about this
Ganelon: I'll be fine.
Apheori (GM): Hopefully the skirmish won't drag on too long.
Gaurav: to be honest, I'd be surprised if the sphinx leaves us alive that long
okay I have 20 minutes now! who's on first?
also thanks everybody for working around my schedule!
Bear Soup Guy: No worries
I rolled a 16 vs the Sphinx's reflex
Apheori (GM): Yeah, that missed.
Bear Soup Guy: butts
Gaurav: this sphinx is crazy agile
Bear Soup Guy: okay I end my turn
Gaurav: just hope it doesn't trip us all again
Apheori (GM): Gogo Radek.
Gaurav: FINISH HIM
Ganelon: Move down to here and toss an infusion at Dave.
She heals her surge value +2 without spending a healing surge.
Apheori (GM): Shiny.
Ganelon: Then, Scouring Weapon.
Which basically means acid bullets.
Gaurav: NICE
Apheori (GM): Hey, that might actually hurt it!
Bear Soup Guy: WOO
Ganelon: Unlike whacks with a shovel?
Apheori (GM): It's like whacking a pillow.
Gaurav: Curse our fluffy adversary.
Ganelon: I'll face the horrible consequences of possibly killing this possibly dead sphinx later.
Gaurav: It's not dead, is it? I have a really awesome power against the undead.
Apheori (GM): It doesn't act dead.
What's the numbers?
Ganelon: [Weapon Attack - Rifle]
rolling 1d20+3+5+1+0
(
7
)
+3+5+1+0
=
16
vs. AC.
Frezak (GM): Dave doesn't act dead either.
Apheori (GM): Nope.
Ganelon: It came from the land of the dead. I don't know if that means anything.
Then I end my turn.
Gaurav: GO DAVE GO
Apheori (GM): Dave will get up and try to pull the sphinx off in one move and not really succeed because she's freaking out and didn't stop to do it properly.
So she gets up and there is still a sphinx on her, though no longer wrapped around her head.
Gaurav: that's progress! porridge?
Apheori (GM): Hold on.
Dave has no idea what's going on and something just attacked her, so she'll blast it.
Gaurav: Sorry. Just trying to see if I can get another attack in before I have to run so you can all go for another round!
Frezak (GM): A round of HELLL
Apheori (GM): So an area burst is...
Uh...
Gaurav: delicious, sphinxy hell
http://dnd-newbie.blogspot.com/2010/06/d-4e-rules-blast-and-burst.html shows you blast-vs-burst pretty well
Apheori (GM): What does this mean? 'Area burst 1 within 10 squares'
Frezak (GM): Area burst 2 within 10 means you pick a sqaure within 10 sqaures and affect anything 2 squares from the target.
Gaurav: burst just means around you. so "within 10 squares" of you.
blast means in a square starting from a square adjacent to you
Ganelon: It's like this:
Gaurav: oh oof my bad
Apheori (GM): Ah, okay.
Gaurav: I was thinking of close burst again.
Apheori (GM): So she blasts at Gravy.
rolling 1d20 + 6 vs ref
(
10
)
+6
=
16
Gaurav: would that blast hit the sphinx also?
Frezak (GM): Wait is this a close blast or close burst?
If it's an Area Burst, then the cat can make a free attack at her.
Apheori (GM): Area burst.
Gaurav: It's an area burst
urk
Frezak (GM): Which I can in turn interrupt with shovelage.
Gaurav: yay!
Apheori (GM): She's holding the cat. It's not fighting her specifically.
Frezak (GM): But that would hit me.
Gaurav: right, but an area burst is like a grenade: it hits one square and affects an area 1 square around it
she could potentially hit Gravy, Rhu and the sphinx if she places it right
Apheori (GM): Okay, how does the cat opportunity attack?
Gaurav: or if she throws it randomly and it comes down somewhere
urk I should leave everybody, sorry
Frezak (GM): It makes a Melee Basic attack.
Gaurav: you should make Rhu delay his move so you can finish another round
Apheori (GM): Which is generally what? The first thing?
Bear Soup Guy: Bye GauRhuv!
Apheori (GM): Okay, sphinx bites Dave.
And you somehow interrupt that?
Frezak (GM): yep
Apheori (GM): Bye mango soup guy.
Frezak (GM): Warden's fury!
rolling 1D20+7+2
(
5
)
+7+2
=
14
Vs Fort.
Apheori (GM): What does that do?
Frezak (GM): bah
Gaurav: if you use a daily against the sphinx, remember that Rhu has an encounter power which lets you reroll an attack roll. byeeeeeeeeeeee
Mango soup guy? Excplain later. BYE!
Apheori (GM): Woah, you hit it.
Frezak (GM): Awesome.
rolling 1D10+4
(
3
)
+4
=
7
And it grant Combat Advantage until the end of my next turn.
Which gives us +2 to hit it.
And then he can carry on with his attack.
Apheori (GM): What kind of damage?
Frezak (GM): Shovel.
I don't have anything that's not shovel damage.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Ganelon: Not even churning earth?
Apheori (GM): Okay, sphinx bites Dave for... uh...
Frezak (GM): Roots of Stone might be stone damage.
Well.
PLanet damage.
Gaia Damage.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d8 + 4
(
8
)
+4
=
12
Ow.
Did Dave's blast hit Gravy?
Frezak (GM): yep
Eh, i can take it.
i'm made to take damage.
I'm solid Gravy.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 2d6 + 5
(
4
+
4
)
+5
=
13
So you take 13 lightning damage and a -2 penalty to defenses.
untl her next turn.
Bear Soup Guy: ouch
Dave: What is going on?
Apheori (GM): She's freaked out.
Like the sphinx.
Should we stop now?
Bear Soup Guy: should we?
Ganelon: Probably.
Dave: Sphinx!
Frezak (GM): We could keep going until Rhu's turn.
Ganelon: Also wow, how'd she get so hurt?
Apheori (GM): Sphinx bit her.
Ganelon: Friggin' cats.
Apheori (GM): I don't know if I used the right numbers, though.
Ganelon: Max damage hits tend to be a pretty big deal.
Apheori (GM): I guess the porridge will ooze over to Gravy and slime up his leg.
Frezak (GM): ewewew
Apheori (GM): This has no functoinal effect unless you think Gravy would be sufficiently put off for it to have one.
Frezak (GM): Ehhh.
He's filled with cat-hate.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Frezak (GM): So do I seem to have damaged this cat at all?
Apheori (GM): Yes, just not very much.
Frezak (GM): Gorram.
if only Radek was the sort of Artificer that could enchant my shovel.
Apheori (GM): And it's now Rhu's turn, so we should probably call it a day unless someone wants to hijack him.
Frezak (GM): Nahhh, not if we're playing tomorrow.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
See you all then!
With any luck, you won't all die.
Bear Soup Guy: Yay tomorrow!
Frezak (GM): If half us die killling this cat, I'll call it a win.
Ganelon: Eyebot comes out next turn.
For precision sphinx removal.
Frezak (GM): I have push 1 on top of my MBAs now.
So i can just start... shovelling cat.
Apheori (GM): Dave's still holding it (it's partially stuck in her dress/skin), though. You'll need a lot of it.
Precision, I mean.
Frezak (GM): Blarg.
I suppose I can just try to make some grabs.
Apheori (GM): Oh, look on the bright side - if it weren't so out of sorts, you all would already be dead!
Frezak (GM): It's out of sorts?
Apheori (GM): Or maybe not. I dunno.
It's stuck and freaked out.
Really freaked out.
Frezak (GM): We can try and deal with that when it's not mincing davenotdave
Apheori (GM): Aye.
Also Dave is still stoned. I forgot about that.
How should that affect things?
Frezak (GM): Up to you.
She might be fine with fighting stoned, like Greibel.
Apheori (GM): He's the experienced one.
It's probably a feat, stoned fight.
He got it long ago.
Ganelon: Like Blind Fighting.
Bear Soup Guy: =D
Frezak (GM): Radek better not make his healing syringes using Greibel blood, or we're in trouble.
Apheori (GM): XD
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Frezak (GM): You're there, fighting some bandits, you take a few hits, call out to Radek.
And bam, you feel life returning to you.
You take a swing.
and BAM, bat country.
Apheori (GM): Bat country?
Ganelon: Unfortunately, he does have a lot of surges.
Frezak (GM): I have more.
I have 14.
Its a Fear and Loathing reference.
Apheori (GM): Ah.
Gaurav: Hello!
Skype is still starting, I'll be on there sometime in the next three hours.
Apheori (GM): That slow, is it?
Gaurav: It is deranged.
I uninstalled the Skype app from my phone because it was just ridiculously awful. The Mac app isn't much better.
... and also just that slow, yes >.<
Apheori (GM): The linux app is relatively decent.
My guess is this is because it hasn't been updated in several years.
Bear Soup Guy: ^
Gaurav: Ha! Nice. My laptop takes several minutes to get from login screen to functional anyway. I think Apple just assumes you're always going to sleep instead of shutting it down or something.
Apheori (GM): My laptop takes about 30s.
29 of which are me mistyping my password.
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Gaurav: Nice.
Does the little red dot mean that Dave is bloody?
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Cat bites are scary.
Gaurav: Damnit.
Bear Soup Guy: They can get a nasty infection
Gaurav: And if she does die and then we manage to kill the sphinx, she'll be stuck with it in the City of the Dead at least for a while.
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Gaurav: Is it time to start using dailies? Or is that just going to hurt Dave more?
Ganelon: I can use mine safely. Don't know about the rest of you.
Frezak (GM): I'm already in the middle of my daily
Apheori (GM): Dave is stoned, so she may not remember if you do hurt her.
Frezak (GM): Oh, good.
Ganelon: That just makes hurting her an even more irresponsible thing to do.
Frezak (GM): She'll forget the 2D10
So?
Are we responsible now?
Ganelon: Well, no...
Gaurav: Oh, I don't care about that; this whole thing is about saving her, and if we end up saving her by killing her, that would be kind of sucky.
Ganelon: Oh, don't worry.
I'll just make a MouseDaveForged.
Apheori (GM): To recap: Dave is holding the sphinx (still partially stuck to her, but enough not that both can now attack), and ya'all were trying to get it off, and the porridge is on Gravy's leg, and it's Rhu's turn.
Gaurav: Hey, what if I get behind her and try to pull her away? Is there any way to justify that as an acrobatics check (+8) instead of an athletics check (+1)?
Ganelon: Everyone who dies while Radek is still alive gets stuffed into the Warforged body.
Apheori (GM): If you just pull her, you'll wind up pulling both of them.
Physics, what?
Frezak (GM): Legionforged.
Gaurav: LEGIONFORGED
Frezak (GM): THis cat must have some serious grip
Gaurav: I think they're entangled
I've had cats stuck to sweaters before
Apheori (GM): Claw snag.
Frezak (GM): BURN HER CLOTHES
Gaurav: I think this encounter might end with us burning everything.
Do I have to charge in a straight line at the sphinx if I want to charge? That'll require more than one square run-up, right?
Ganelon: I have several sources of fire damage that can even be shared with you lot.
Frezak (GM): yarr
Apheori (GM): Assume both the sphinx and Dave are in the same square.
Frezak (GM): Burn clothes, heal Dave.
Gaurav: oh nvm I can use this power without charging. There's just extra chargy benefits I don't need. Cool.
Apheori (GM): I just can't actually do that because not aligning to grid uses a key I can't use.
Gaurav: I move two steps to maneuver beside Dave and beside the cat.
Frezak (GM): Rave, you get +2 to hit the car.
Ganelon: I think Frezak might be able to do that for you.
Frezak (GM): *cat
Ganelon: Uh.
What.
Apheori (GM): What...
Bear Soup Guy: TIME IS FALLING APART
Frezak (GM): WHAT IS HAPPENING
Gaurav: I think it's fine; we know how that works. I'll just get confused if I can't see their stats separately.
Frezak (GM): I MOVED ONE TOKEN
Ganelon: YOU KILLED US
Gaurav: And destroyed a universe.
Ganelon: ALL FOUR OF US
Frezak (GM): I have no idea what happened.
>.>
Apheori (GM): I tried to type and it deleted everything. o_O
Frezak (GM): WHAT
This...
is some Hole power.
Gaurav: Ha. This game is going meta!
Apheori (GM): OKAY.
Rhu was doing stuff.
Continue please.
Ganelon: Let me... get our initiative numbers from the log.
Gaurav: Can we get initiative working again first? I just want to make sure I know when the cat and Dave go after me.
Apheori (GM): AGH.
Frezak (GM): I'm going right after you, so I can push the cat if they're seperated.
Ganelon: Rhu: 18
Radek: 3
Gravy: 18
(Rhu should be before him)
Greibel: 4
Bear Soup Guy: GOOD AS NEW
Frezak (GM): "Good as stoned!"
Apheori (GM): Excellent.
Gaurav: Naah, I can't separate them. I'm just going to hit the cat and hope that I don't hit Dave.
okay, so Rhu moved two squares to maneuver behind the cat
then he hits it with a Whirlwind Charge, which, weirdly, no whirlwinds
Apheori (GM): If you're behind the cat, you're behind Dave and Dave is between you and the cat.
Gaurav: oh wait
I kind of imagined they were just a maelstorm of arms and fur at this point
Apheori (GM): This game doesn't have the best mechanics for cats.
Gaurav: can I undo my move then? no point hitting dave.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Gaurav: thanks! Instead, I take a step N to get on the Gravy (i.e. not-Dave) side of the cat.
THEN Whirlwind Charge
rolling 1d20+5 Wisdom vs AC
(
17
)
+5
=
22
Gan: did you say I get a +2 on top of that?
Ganelon: That wasn't me.
Frezak (GM): You get a +2 from your Weapon Proficiency.
With all your Weapon attacks.
And you get another +2 on top from my Warden's Fury.
Ganelon: Not to mention a 1/2 level bonus that you might be counting already
Gaurav: I've got the 1/2 level, I don't have the +2 weapon because the power says "Wisdom vs AC", which means a straight Wisdom attack, right?
Ganelon: Nah.
Apheori (GM): Tell me what this attack looks like so I can determine if you hit both of them.
Gaurav: I did NOT count your Fury though. 22+2=24, woo!
Ganelon: If the power has the Weapon keyword you add proficiency bonuses of that weapon too.
Frezak (GM): Except if a power has the Weapon keyword, you get to add your Weapon Proficiency.
Gaurav: DAMN
I did not know this.
24+2 = 26.
DM: It's a melee attack, targets one creature, and has the fluff text: "As you charge your foe, divine light surrounds you in a
protective nimbus, then erupts at your foe."
Frezak (GM): SEAR IT
Gaurav: One flambéed cat coming up.
Frezak (GM): SEAR IT HARD
Apheori (GM): Go on.
(It is a hit.)
Gaurav: Yay!
"Wisdom modified damage" means without the half level, right?
Frezak (GM): Correct.
Gaurav:
rolling 2*(2d6)+4
2*(
(
1
+
5
)
)+4
=
16
That's it. That's the damage.
Apheori (GM): What kind is it?
I have to keep asking because the sphinx resists some kinds of damage.
Gaurav: Right. There's no kind associated with this power.
Ganelon: That's not actually the correct way to do a damage equation.
Apheori (GM): Sword?
Ganelon: He uses a maul.
Apheori (GM): Ah, okay.
Frezak (GM): Hammer damage.
Gaurav: It's a Divine power, so, like, Hazz is involved. but the attack itself doesn't have any keywords.
Ganelon: 2[W] means you roll twice as many damage dice as you would normally, not that you multiply your damage dice result by 2.
Gaurav: Oh. Right. Then that.
Ganelon: So like...
rolling 4d6
(
6
+
5
+
6
+
4
)
=
21
Gaurav: oh!
Ganelon:
rolling 2*(2d6)
2*(
(
2
+
5
)
)
=
14
Gaurav: my bad
rolling 4d6+4
(
5
+
5
+
4
+
1
)
+4
=
19
Ganelon: Also, damn. That 21.
Gaurav: Why 21?
Ganelon: No, no, just what I rolled. Of course it was high when I was just demonstrating.
19 is quite good too, though.
Gaurav: ah right! yes. mauls are painful.
I'll use my minor to make a diplomacy check to convince the sphinx to give up.
Rhu: "Let her go! We don't want to hurt you!"
Apheori (GM): You just hit it.
Ganelon: Gravy probably does want to hurt it.
Rhu: (is a diplomacy check a good minor?)
Apheori (GM): Roll.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+0 diplomacy check
(
20
)
+0
=
20
Frezak (GM): Good lord;
Ganelon: Sorta. Talking is a free action.
But a minor is more fair because talking isn't necessarily meant to accomplish anything.
The sphinx hisses.
Gaurav: given that my CHA is -1, I assume I just flat out told it that we all really wanted to kill it
that's the end of my turn
Frezak (GM): Well, you rolled a 20.
Apheori (GM): Gravy!
Frezak (GM): So you were literally as charming as you can be.
Gaurav: Critical charm.
Frezak (GM): Okay, he's still granting Combat advantage for this turn.
Sooo...
I'll smack it with Strength Of Stone.
rolling 1D20+7+2
(
1
)
+7+2
=
10
VS AC
graaah
Frezak (GM): NEXT
Gaurav: That was my encounter btw. My daily gives me a healing surge, so I'll save it until I need healing.
Frezak (GM): And it's no longer granting Combat Advantage.
Apheori (GM): >.<
Okay.
Frezak (GM): It is still marked, however.
Apheori (GM): The sphinx will lick itself and Dave and then hack up a hairball on Gravy.
Frezak (GM): It's not trying to disentangle itself?
Apheori (GM): Something else took priority.
How do monsters handle surges?
Frezak (GM): They technically have one.
Ganelon: They all have 1/day.
Apheori (GM): And the value?
Gaurav: Bearing in mind that the Mouseforged was fine before the sphinx drooled on it, you might not want to touch that hairball.
Frezak (GM): 1/4 max HP.
Ganelon: Well unless sphinx drool causes your soul to bleed out your eye sockets, those two things may have been unrelated.
Also, if sphinx drool does that, we're killing this thing.
Frezak (GM): But normally monsters don't have a way of SPENDING surges
Apheori (GM): Gods dammit.
Frezak (GM): WHAT DID YOU DO
Also how.
Apheori (GM): I tried to delete what I'd typed into chat.
Frezak (GM): You have the power to delete players.
Apheori (GM): Chat wasn't selected.
Bloody hell.
Bear Soup Guy: THIS IS OKAY
THIS IS RELEVANT TO THE SCENARIO
Time is just hiccuping
Frezak (GM): That sounds pretty relevant to me.
Gaurav: Or going into the sphinx-drool manufacturing industry.
Apheori (GM): Okay, Gravy has a hairball on him.
NEXT.
Also Dave got partially healed.
Frezak (GM): Does the hairball DO anything?
Apheori (GM): It's gross and sticky.
...so no, not really.
Frezak (GM): So's the cat.
Gaurav: phew
Ganelon: And the porridge.
Bear Soup Guy: Gravy is very uncomfortable
Ganelon: He's being flanked by two gross, sticky things.
Frezak (GM): I hate my job.
Gaurav: What if the porridge eats the hairball and turns into a sphinx?
Ganelon: Then Greibel is never allowed to complain about me making "abominations" like the Mouseforged ever again.
Apheori (GM): Greibel, go!
Bear Soup Guy: Okay!
move one square
And I will use thorn whip, which is the coolest attack in my complete arsenal of cool attacks
Gaurav: huh, I'm pretty sure Rhu was just south of Gravy, but I'm okay with this arrangement too.
Bear Soup Guy: So Apheori, this attack is big vines coming out and trying to snatch the cat and pulling it two squares if it hits
for reference
Apheori (GM): Okay, roll.
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20+5 vs cat fortitude
(
20
)
+5
=
25
AAHHHHH YEEEEAH
Frezak (GM): I hate you people.
Apheori (GM): And roll again for no apparent reason.
Gaurav: woooooooooooo!
Bear Soup Guy: A d20?
Apheori (GM): This one's for Dave.
So just reroll to see if it hits both.
Bear Soup Guy: oh right
rolling 1d20+5 vs fortitude
(
15
)
+5
=
20
Apheori (GM): Because this has the potential to pull them apart.
Hmm.
Okay, hits both.
Sorry.
Bear Soup Guy: technically the move only hits one creature, but you're the DM :/
Apheori (GM): Aye, but they're stuck together.
So I'm treating it weird.
They've been FYUUUZED.
Frezak (GM): I'm sorry I said we should do more fighting >.>
Apheori (GM): LOIK THIS JYUUICE.
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d8+4 damage
(
1
)
+4
=
5
Apheori (GM): Sorry.
Frezak (GM): I APOLOGISE
Ganelon: Sphinx got crit, though.
So that's max damage, which is 12.
Bear Soup Guy: And Dave and the sphinx are pulled two squares in my direction
Are you ready?
Greibel: GET OVER HERE
Ganelon: FINISH IT
Also, I did get the fusion reference.
Gaurav: I don't suppose we get opportunity attacks as Dave-sphinx whiz by?
Greibel: oh sweet, crit on the sphinx
Apheori (GM): Yarp.
Ganelon: I just can't remember the exact wording of the other guy who got all annoyed about his friend wanting to fuze bloody everything.
You don't get opportunity attacks for forced movement.
Apheori (GM): You also probably should have gotten opportunity attacks when the cat was licking Dave.
Ganelon: There are just a few powers that simulate that effect using different rules.
Apheori (GM): Oops.
Ganelon: Like, uh... Bards can knock someone around and grant one ally a basic attack against them.
But their own knocking-around attack doesn't do much damage and it can't be abused by sticking someone in a big mob of melee guys so that they all get attacks.
It's really hard to force a thing to grant opportunity attacks. Dominate effects are one of the only ways and they're really tough to get powers for.
Bear Soup Guy: okay if there's no opportunity things then that's it for my turn
Ganelon: Okay...
First, I summon the eyebot.
Apheori (GM): Adorable.
Bear Soup Guy: AWWWWWWWW =D
Ganelon: It is floating in the air (though it can't technically be attacked anyways)
Bear Soup Guy: "IT IS A HARBINGER OF DEATH! STOP MAKING COOING NOISES!"
Apheori (GM): Not even by a cat?
Frezak (GM): Actually, it can.
Ganelon: It can?
Apheori (GM): Cats'll attack points of light.
Frezak (GM): Anything you summon can be attacked.
Ganelon: What HP does it have?
Frezak (GM): There's a line about Constructs.
Apheori (GM): Including seed turrets.
Frezak (GM): It has your defences +4, HP= your surge value.
Ganelon: Ah.
Okay, so it's just really hard to hit on account of being so small. Also, it's 5 squares above the battle here, so 25 feet in the air.
Gaurav: Cats are pretty good at flying objects: http://tumblr.ggvaidya.com/post/78985664218/traxits-jinxamataz-commissarcuddles
Ganelon: Whenever an ally of mine makes an attack against an enemy of mine, the eyebot shoots a laser at that enemy, which does 5 damage.
The attacks you guys make need to hit, though.
Gaurav: Does Dave count as an ally?
Ganelon: Yeah, but it won't help her kill any of you.
Apheori (GM): Does the porridge?
Ganelon: Because you aren't enemies.
I... guess?
Gaurav: Fancy!
Ganelon: Anyway, then I'll give Dave some more fancy drugs, but this isn't one of my normal heals.
This is a... Restorative Infusion.
Frezak (GM): Radek's note: include sentient breakfasts in Eyebot IFF.
Ganelon: Which is more like a "prevent more damage" thing than a "fix existing damage" one, because it gives her 20 THP.
Gaurav: I'm imagining Greibel eyeing that infusion as it goes by.
Apheori (GM): Does it counter psychedelic mushrooms?
Oh.
Ganelon: Not unless you say so.
Apheori (GM): Let's just treat the effects like poison. Anything that can fix poison should fix mushrooms.
Ganelon: But no, I'm doing this so that these guys can keep accidentally hitting her and she'll be relatively unharmed by it. For a while.
Apheori (GM): Neat.
Gaurav: She's no longer bloodied, is she?
Apheori (GM): Right.
Ganelon: Eyebot activation is a standard and that was a minor, but I don't need to move so that's my turn.
Also, not quite.
In fact, it's not advisable to even track THP by just adding it to existing HP.
Because it goes away when the fight ends.
Apheori (GM): So how do you track it?
Ganelon: Normally, I put a number on a status icon.
Like... this.
Except, of course, this is 20 THP and these can only handle single digits.
Apheori (GM): ...damiit.
Ganelon: So either we need two status icons or to just remember she's got 20.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Bear Soup Guy: open a .txt or something to keep track
Apheori (GM): What are all your passive perceptions?
Ganelon: It's a bit awkward but you can only have three numbers on a single token.
18 here.
Gaurav: Man. One of my powers can give me 5 THP. 20 is ridiculous.
Bear Soup Guy: 20
Gaurav: Passive perception 22.
Ganelon: You're not playing a healer-man, though. You're a Striker.
Gaurav: I know! I just didn't know such things could be.
Ganelon: To be fair, this was also a daily (utility).
It has an additional effect as well. Dave can use a minor action to give away any amount of her THP until it runs out for whatever reason.
So there's probably some weird magic involved too.
Gaurav: I'm being impressed. Just let me be impressed. From way back here, Rhu can't really see what's going on, except Dave looks way more resilient somehow and a robot like the one we sent through the portal is now hovering ominously. This bodes well.
Ganelon: Except this robot has a button on it.
Frezak (GM): It better be red.
Gaurav: Rhu is tech-un-savvy enough not to notice. Or care.
Ganelon: And nobody, including Radek, knows what it does.
Apheori (GM): Cue Amadi appearing out of nowhere just to press the button.
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Ganelon: I'm making you decide what the button does, DM.
Since you have such an affinity for madness.
Gaurav backs away from the computer screen
Apheori (GM): Was Radek mad when he put it there?
Ganelon: He was drunk, which for him is almost as good.
Apheori (GM): Ah.
Well, she won't do this just yet.
Dave's turn, then...
Dave...
...punches Greibel in the face.
Bear Soup Guy: Fair enough
Apheori (GM): How do you roll that? >.<
Ganelon: Unarmed attacks?
It's just a d20 + 1/2 level + strength mod.
1d4+strength damage.
Counts as an "improvised" weapon.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 + 1
(
14
)
+1
=
15
Gaurav: Why would anybody attack Greibel?!
Bear Soup Guy: vs what?
Apheori (GM): He yanked her... armful.
Ganelon: AC.
Bear Soup Guy: yeah, miss
Gaurav: But look at his face!
Ganelon: They're really not accurate even if you're a strong guy.
Gaurav: fair point about that yank though
Ganelon: I would slap Greibel but nothing intended to do meaningful damage.
Bear Soup Guy: Greibel could use a good slap now and then
Ganelon: Bonks on the noggin, too.
You know, the kind of physical abuse meant to restore sense to the senseless.
Bear Soup Guy: indeed
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d6
(
2
)
=
2
Would 17 hit or is that still too low?
Bear Soup Guy: Still low
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Bear Soup Guy: For such an uncoordinated stoner, Greibel's defenses are awesomely robust
Apheori (GM): Dave shakes the sphinx at Greibel and cusses at him.
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Apheori (GM): The sphinx does not look happy.
Frezak (GM): Reflex is evasion.
AC is the ability to dodge AND parry AND Deflect AND ignore damage.
Ganelon: I can't even remember how we got his defenses that high.
Frezak (GM): His AC is him just being too stoned to notice.
Bear Soup Guy: I think it had to do with all the special constitution stuff
Ganelon: But the only class that can use Con as its bonus to AC is... well, Warden.
Apheori (GM): The porridge, meanwhile, will finish climbing Gravy, perch on his head for a moment, and then launch itself at Dave.
Bear Soup Guy: Primal Guardian adds con as AC as well, apparently
Ganelon: Oh!
Well then.
Apheori (GM): Dave and the sphinx now have porridge splattered all over them.
GRAVY!
Bear Soup Guy: and yeah, Greibel totally just stumbles around narrowly avoiding attacks unwittingly
Apheori (GM): Also can you put the porridge on them too? >.>
Frezak (GM): Dunno how you'll be able to SEE anything in that pile.
Apheori (GM): Put it off to the side slightly?
Thanks.
Frezak (GM): I'll take a few steps back...
Ganelon: There's a sphinx in there somewheres.
Frezak (GM): And use Goring Charge.
If I go to the square next to Rhu am I flanking the cat?
Apheori (GM): Arguably if you're in front of it, you should be flanking with dave. I think. I'm not sure.
Frezak (GM): According to rules, I just need an ally in the square across from me to flank.
Apheori (GM): Huh.
Well, greibel is across.
So... sure!
Frezak (GM): But since we're not following rules....
Right.
So, Goring Charge.
rolling 1D20+9+1+2+2
(
7
)
+9+1+2+2
=
21
Vs AC
Apheori (GM): Right, Dave could be in the way, but I think it's fine here.
Yup.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D6+4
(
1
)
+4
=
5
Horn damage, and the cat is prone.
And I keep the mark going on it.
Ganelon: Eyebot shoots a laser for 5.
Frezak (GM): Lasers!
And that's all from me.
Gaurav: Is the sphinx sticking out of the mess in any particular direction? Is there a way to maximise my chances of not hitting Dave?
And does anybody know the minimum distance for a charge?
Frezak (GM): More than 1 square away.
So, at least 2 free spacs.
*qpace
Apheori (GM): Suppose Dave is facing the porridge direction. Anything not behind her should hit the sphinx, anything from the side is less likely to hit her.
Frezak (GM): jeebus.
SPACES.
Gaurav: So if I attack from the east or southeast, Dave has better odds? Or do I have it backwards?
Apheori (GM): Also Gravy got porridge bits all over his horns.
Just so you know.
That's backwards.
Gaurav: Cool. Woah, eyebot's lookin' cool.
Rhu goes around Gravy and comes at the Dave/sphinx/porridge complex from the NW
He attacks with a Bond of Retribution.
Frezak (GM): Cat is prone so you get CA.
Ganelon: What does that do?
Gaurav:
rolling 1d20+5+2+2 wisdom vs AC +2 CA +2 weapon proficiency
(
3
)
+5+2+2
=
12
eep
Apheori (GM): Nope.
Gaurav: essentially nothing. I'm out of encounter powers, and I'm saving my daily for when things get bad/I get hurt. So it's just at-will powers for now.
oh oh
Ganelon: I forgot about this, but the eyebot also negates enemy concealment within its range (which is 3).
That's not relevant here.
But if there's like smoke or darkness, we can use it to spot targets for us too.
Gaurav: when the oath of enmity target is the only enemy adjacent to me, I can make two attack rolls and use either result
so let's try that again
rolling 1d20+5+2+2 wisdom vs AC +2 CA +2 weapon proficiency
(
4
)
+5+2+2
=
13
hmm
Frezak (GM): I BELIEVE IN YOU, RHU.
Apheori (GM): Rhu, Gravy: You notice the gardener running into one of the buildings, giving y'all a wide berth on the way.
Frezak (GM): WE CAN GET THROUGH THIS
Apheori (GM): NOPE.
Frezak (GM): SLAY HIM
Gaurav: more diplomacy for my minor, I guess
Rhu: "It's not too late to seek atonement for your crimes!"
Gaurav: oh wait actually
I'll use diplomacy against Dave
The sphinx grins at Rhu.
Gaurav: try to convince her we're trying to help and not to punch Greibel in the face pls
rolling 1d20+0 diplomacy check against Dave
(
1
)
+0
=
1
um
Apheori (GM): Snrk.
Bear Soup Guy: OH MY GOD WHAT HAVE YOU DONE
Ganelon: She's going to betray us now.
Frezak (GM): So Rhu just said "COME GET SOME, SKANK"
Gaurav: end of Rhu's turn
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 + 5 vs will on Rhu.
(
16
)
+5
=
21
Gaurav: years from now, when we have all been tortured by the slaves of Queen Dave of The Entire Universe and thrown into her vast dungeons to rot through all of eternity, we will look back on this moment and laugh. Or weep, one or the other.
eep
hit
Frezak (GM): Wait.
What is the car doing?
Apheori (GM): Grinning.
I assume you meant cat?
Frezak (GM): yeah >.>
If that's an attack roll, I get to interrupt again.
With more fury.
Apheori (GM): It's a grin.
Frezak (GM): Or miffed-ness.
Is it attacking his will defence?
Gaurav: It's vs will. That sounds like an attack roll to me.
d20 vs Will, I mean
Frezak (GM): My things trigger on any offensive action, not just physical ones.
Ganelon: Rolling against defenses plus having negative effects generally means the rules call it an attack.
Apheori (GM): How do you interrupt a grin?
Alright, but it makes no sense.
Frezak (GM): By hitting the cat with a hammer.
Ganelon shrugs.
Frezak (GM): Or shovel.
Because it's not looking at me, basically.
Ganelon: The idea is that the cat is ignoring Gravy to do unpleasant things to his allies.
And that makes him mad.
Or possibly jealous.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+7+2
(
19
)
+7+2
=
28
Vs Cat Fortitude.
Apheori (GM): Probably the latter.
Gaurav: Gravy sees the Cat start to grin and hits it.
Ganelon: It doesn't stop the grin, of course.
Apheori (GM): You hit the grin with a shovel.
Ganelon: There just might be some teeth missing.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D10+4
(
4
)
+4
=
8
And I slide it one square southeast and it grants Combat Advantage.
Apheori (GM): The grin twists and swirls around the shovel like a snake oozing through the sphinx's fur.
Ganelon: Oh gods, that's creepy.
Frezak (GM): I NEED A MAGIC SHOVEL.
Ganelon: I need more magic dust!
Apheori (GM): Can you move that... pile for me?
Ganelon: Oh right.
Gaurav: eep
Ganelon: The eyebot lasers it for 5 again.
Gaurav: I'm glad the shovel got between me and that grin
Frezak (GM): Pile moved.
And now it can complete the grin.
Apheori (GM): It didn't get between it. If anything, it made it worse.
Frezak (GM): Unless the grin is melee only.
Ganelon: Pew pew.
Apheori (GM): Rhu has a -2 to all defenses.
Gaurav: ugh
save ends?
Apheori (GM): Er, attacks, not defenses.
Yeah, I think.
Gaurav: oh phew
minor phew
a melee grin sounds terrible
Ganelon: Probably a Close Burst, one target
Because the idea of a grin provoking attacks from non-defenders really is silly.
Apheori (GM): You saw the grin twist through its fur. It can target anything looking at it.
Ganelon: I would just like to remind Rhu here that HE brought this thing to us.
Apheori (GM): Hee.
Gaurav: we should all stop looking at the sphinx
Ganelon: Even if cats don't really care what their "owners" think.
Apheori (GM): The sphinx will get up and try to disentangle itself again.
It fails.
And then it licks itself and Dave again.
NEXT.
Bear Soup Guy: Quick noobie question
I think I've asked this before too
With encounter powers, is it you can only use one encounter power per battle, or each encounter power can be used max once per battle?
Ganelon: The latter.
You can use many encounter powers per battle, but each one only once.
Bear Soup Guy: okay cool
Ganelon: Gonna do the, uh...
Grass Thing?
Apheori (GM): This sphinx really needs to get unstuck.
Bear Soup Guy: Oh I was just asking to make sure
Haven't planned the move yet
Apheori (GM): All it can really do at present is attack Dave and preen.
Ganelon: We're trying to get the yowling monstrosity off of her, it just isn't working!
Apheori (GM): You've made progress! It's just... not enough.
Bear Soup Guy: Okay, thorn whip again because all my other powers are against reflex pretty much :P
rolling 1d20+5 vs cat fort
(
4
)
+5
=
9
ah poo
Apheori (GM): Alas.
Roll again for Dave just in case?
Bear Soup Guy: eek
Gaurav: That's a at-will power, right?
Ganelon: Don't worry dude.
Bear Soup Guy: yeah it is
Ganelon: Dave still has her 20 THP.
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20+5 vs Dave fort
(
4
)
+5
=
9
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Bear Soup Guy: ah, cool
Apheori (GM): You didn't even get a pile of porridge back.
Ganelon: You couldn't actually hurt her even on a crit.
Just chip away at that shield.
Bear Soup Guy: cool
Apheori (GM): Anything else?
Bear Soup Guy: that'll do
Ganelon: I use my move action to relocate the eye.
And... Thundering Armor on Dave.
That one which pushes.
[Implement Attack]
rolling 1d20+5+1+0
(
20
)
+5+1+0
=
26
Ooooh
Gaurav: woooooo
Bear Soup Guy: \o/
Ganelon: So... force expands outwards from Dave, and I should dearly hope that's enough to push the sphinx away from her.
Apheori (GM): It still has a claw snagged.
But it definitely pushed it.
Ganelon: Well it still takes the damage, which is normally a 1d8+5, but with a crit that's maxed... meaning 13.
Force damage.
Wait no.
Thunder damage.
So it's like, uh... sound?
Apheori (GM): Staticky spinx.
Don't touch it.
Ganelon: ...I could play a mean air guitar with this power and my rifle.
Gaurav: Do you hear the people sing / singing the song of destroying sphinxes
Ganelon: Dave also gets a +1 to AC until my next turn ends. And I end this turn.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Dave gets up, disentangling the last claw, and drops the sphinx on the ground.
Gaurav: YES!
Apheori (GM): She then sets Gravy on fire.
Frezak (GM): Delightful.
Gaurav: ... wait
Bear Soup Guy: collateral damage
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 + 8 vs reflex on Gravy
(
11
)
+8
=
19
Frezak (GM): Yep
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d10 + 5 fire damage, and ongoing 10 fire damage (save ends)
(
5
)
+5
=
10
Frezak (GM): awesome.
Rhu gapes in horror at the giant horned flaming figure beside him
Bear Soup Guy: Not relevant at the moment, but glancing at my char sheet I just noticed that I have a feat that lets an ally re-roll initiative
so I'll try to remember that next time Radek rolls a 3 >_<
Rhu: oooo nice!
Frezak (GM): Awesome!
Apheori (GM): She is also shouting something about how the curtains are open and how the light is all wrong, nothing like Spain.
Gaurav: It might make sense for Radek to stay near the end of the initiative order so he can put out any fires we start. Sometimes literally.
Nothing is ever like Spain.
Bear Soup Guy: Good point
The porridge reforms and starts bouncing around, jiggling all the while.
Gaurav: Dance, porridge, dance.
Frezak (GM): Lucky the porridge isn't still on me
or we'd have flapjacks
The porridge: Snrk.
Apheori (GM): Er, ooc.
And that's it for them.
Frezak (GM): I will use my Font of Life
Gaurav: Helvetica?
Frezak (GM): to make a save against fire BEFORE my turn starts.
rolling 1D20
(
12
)
=
12
Bear Soup Guy: ooo, nifty
Frezak (GM): And the flames die out.
Gaurav: YAY!
Bear Soup Guy: Gravy puts a hand up against the flames and they disperse like smoke
Apheori (GM): You're terrible.
Ganelon: Wardens, man.
Frezak (GM): So, the cat is detached.
No, she means the pun.
What am I actually doing?
Hitting anything?
Because that's all I can do.
Gaurav: We could keep hitting the sphinx and maybe Dave will help. or maybe she'll side with the sphinx, which will make an uneven battle even unevener.
Apheori (GM): Agh, dammit, I keep forgetting things.
Bear Soup Guy: Dave has pretty low health although no we've TP'd her >_<
Ganelon: She looks fine to me. Not even bloodied.
Gaurav: can we leave initiative of our own accord? give Dave and the sphinx time to sort out their unentangled differences?
Bear Soup Guy: now*
I meant in case she sided with the sphynx
She got bloodied pretty easily earlier
Ganelon: Oh.
Well yeah, controllers have pretty bad HP normally.
Bad defenses, too. You're supposed to protect them.
Bear Soup Guy: ah, makes sense
Our party definitely hasn't failed at that at all
Gaurav: talking is a free action, right? someone shout at Dave and see where she's going? Maybe someone who didn't critically fail at talking to her last round?
Ganelon: Well, the THP is my way of protecting her.
Bear Soup Guy: Good point
Ganelon: I'd suggest Gravy since it's his turn and she just set him on fire.
Frezak (GM): I can... uhh... Intimidate her.
Gaurav: that might scare her into siding with the sphinx.
Ganelon: You can't possibly be less diplomatic than Rhy.
Rhu*
Frezak (GM): I tihnk I could.
Gaurav: Maybe intimidate the sphinx (which won't work) then talk to Dave so she snows where we stand?
It's not a diplomacy check. You're just saying hi, hello, how are you, is it good to get the sphinx off your face, are you going to kill us all
chit-chat
The Gravedigger: Stop burning me, Dave!
It's really rude!
Dave: Sauce!
The Gravedigger: I refuse to be barbecued!
Dave: The gleamings, the dark towers shining!
Gaurav: Is this the psychotropics talking? Could a Heal check help with that?
What cures poison?
I just remembered two important things.
Ganelon: Heal checks to administer first aid.
They take a standard action.
Frezak (GM): I could /try/ that.
I have... uh.. 2.
Gaurav: One is that I have to leave in 10-15 mins, but I will be back in 1-2 hours, if you all want to hang around for that. It looks like you might be able to finish the battle without me, which would be totally fine with me.
The second thing is that Hazz'ridan has specifically commanded Rhu to guard Dave.
(and Amadi)
so if the party turns on Dave, Rhu is going to have to switch sides
Frezak (GM): I'll try and administer first aid.
rolling 1D20+2
(
20
)
+2
=
22
Gaurav: he hasn't realised this yet because he's an idiot but he will if anybody tries attacking Dave.
Frezak (GM): fuck yeah
Gaurav: YEEEEESSSSS
Frezak (GM): I BURY THE POISON
Dave: Does this prompt attacks of opportunity?
Apheori (GM): ooc, sorry.
Frezak (GM): Nope.
Ganelon: You would think so.
Frezak (GM): SHH YOU
Apheori (GM): How does it not?
Is there magic?
Frezak (GM): Because if it did then once the healer goes down so does the whole party.
Gaurav: If Gan can throw healing stuff across the room, I think Frezak can distract Dave long enough to jab her with some healing stuffs.
Especially on a 20.
Ganelon: Well, my healing stuff is a limited resource.
Apheori (GM): What about the spinx?
Ganelon: I actually have two of these per encounter, plus the big THP one once per day.
Frezak (GM): Administering first aid is not an action that provokes opportunity attacks, according to core rules.
Apheori (GM): You have two hostiles right next to you and you're trying to jab one of them with something pointy.
Okay.
Frezak (GM): If you want to change that you're the dm.
Ganelon: First aid is for stuff like helping other people make saving throws, using their second winds without requiring an action, and... stabilizing dying people.
Gaurav: Gravy didn't move past the sphinx, he moved up to it, but yeah, I do see that the sphinx might swipe at Gravy as he's distracted. Or something.
Plus, you're healing someone who is a little nuts and thinks you're the enemy.
Apheori (GM): Do core rules have anything about administering first aid to unwilling/hostile patients?
Ganelon: Nope.
Gaurav: So that might attract its own oppty attack from Dave.
Apheori (GM): Seems like it should be treated as an attack roll.
Frezak (GM): She's getting better whether she wants to or not.
Apheori (GM): Which would also explain the lack of opportuity attacks provoked.
Ganelon: Amusingly, it doesn't even say that you administer first aid to an ally, just a "character".
Gaurav: Which suggests it was a really smart move sending Gravy in to do the imposed healing.
Ganelon: So like, for Greibel's weird hippie star-magic thing which explodes when enemies save against it?
Apheori (GM): You should have a roll to see if you actually hit her.
Frezak (GM): Oh, fuck it
Ganelon: By the core rules, you could HELP an enemy save against it to blow them up.
Frezak (GM): I attack the cat instead.
Forget it.
Apheori (GM): >.>
Gaurav: In D&D mechanics, healing someone is like diplomacy: you can compel someone to be charmed or have an effect on them even if they don't want it.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+7+2
(
2
)
+7+2
=
11
Cat AC.
Turn over.
Apheori (GM): Nope.
Frezak (GM): because trying to help Dave is clearly too much work.
Apheori (GM): Are we continuing without Gaurav?
Gaurav: Gaurav still here
SOOOOO
Apheori (GM): Dealing with psychotics is quite difficult, yes.
For NOW.
What about when he isn't?
Gaurav:
rolling 1d20+10 heal check against Dave
(
17
)
+10
=
27
I don't know if that's a standard or a minor
Ganelon: Standard.
Bear Soup Guy: I imagine we can finish the round and then take a break till he gets back
Apheori (GM): Was that to heal or to hit? Roll to hit first. She'll be trying to dodge your efforts.
Gaurav: dodge?
did you say dodge?
Apheori (GM): YOU'RE ATTACKING HER.
Gaurav:
rolling 1d20+8 acrobatics check to counterdodge
(
7
)
+8
=
15
Apheori (GM): ...in her mind.
Gaurav: naan that makes sense
I was just pleased I'd get to do an acrobatics check
+8 and all that
Apheori (GM): Acro... eh, whatever.
You successfully get to and heal her. I need to look up how healing works.
Gaurav: okay I HAVE to run so whatever the consequence of those actions are
my minor is going to be
Ganelon: I can just tell you. PHB1, page 185.
Either the target gets a +2 to their next saving throw or you immediately give them a saving throw.
Gaurav:
rolling 1d20+8 religion check pray loudly to Hazz'ridan to show Dave that we -- and particularly Rhu -- means to guard her no matter what and she needs to deal with this sorry.
(
10
)
+8
=
18
and BOOM
I HAVE TO RUN
SEE YOU ALL IN 1-2 HOURS OR SO
BYEEEEEEE
Bear Soup Guy: BYE GAUR
Ganelon: If they're dying, they stop making death saving throws until they take damage again... so they stop bleeding all over the floor.
You can also use a first aid attempt to let them use their second wind if they haven't already, taking up your action rather than theirs.
Apheori (GM): Does it treat poison?
Ganelon: That is typically a Save Ends effect. You can treat *disease* with it, however, which is something a little more long-term.
Endurance is used to fight disease but heal attempts can let the healer replace someone's endurance roll with their heal result (if it's good enough to make things better).
That's supposed to happen over a long period of time, though.
Apheori (GM): Huh.
This is weird.
Ganelon: It's almost like nobody thought to make up rules for people tripping on mushrooms.
Bear Soup Guy: If only D&D had been created in the 60s
Apheori (GM): Meh, I guess it'll just up her... uh... general resistance to the effects, or whatever.
So Dave will fall over in response.
Gaurav is gone, but we might as well at least finish the round.
Ganelon: Sure.
Bear Soup Guy: Yeah
Apheori (GM): The sphinx grins at Gravy.
rolling 1d20 + 5 vs will
(
20
)
+5
=
25
So that's a -2 to attack rolls, save ends.
Bear Soup Guy: Sphinx turns into a ball of ethereal flame
Apheori (GM): And then it pounces at Rhu.
Frezak (GM): What is a punce?
*pounce?
Apheori (GM): An attack.
Why it would attack him, I don't know.
Frezak (GM): From where it is?
Bear Soup Guy: http://gyazo.com/a4382f1d7c81a059840c51fce99822e1
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+7
(
18
)
+7
=
25
Cat Fort
rolling 1D10+4
(
10
)
+4
=
14
It grants CA, and I push it to here.
Apheori (GM): Is that with or without the penalty?
Grin.
Frezak (GM): Without.
That's 23 against cat fort.
Apheori (GM): Then you fail.
Frezak (GM): Of course I do.
Bear Soup Guy: pretty sure the cat has lower fort than 21
Frezak (GM): I don't fucking know anything anymore.
Bear Soup Guy: or 23 even
Apheori (GM): Cat had lower when it was stuck to Dave.
Bear Soup Guy: I guess that makes some kind of sense
Apheori (GM): Dave will shout 'KITTY!' as it flies overhead.
Since pouncing involves movement.
rolling 1d20 + 8 vs reflex
(
3
)
+8
=
11
Does anyone have Rhu's character sheet?
Er, wait, that was supposed to be +11 for a pounce.
Bear Soup Guy: Does diagonal count as being in an adjacent square?
Apheori (GM): It should.
Bear Soup Guy: okay
well, this http://gyazo.com/4e4e6e95e7a7eecaf440f23f33517341
And by melee basic attack I assume it means my staff implement
Ganelon: It means your staff as a weapon, unless you have a power that can replace your melee basic.
Bear Soup Guy: only other melee I have requires morphing to beast so staff it is
Apheori (GM): Is this before or after sphinx attack hits? Since it apparently does unless I forgot something, which is likely.
Bear Soup Guy: good question
Apheori (GM): What did I forget?
Ganelon: It's an immediate reaction.
It takes place after the triggering action.
Apheori (GM): Okay. And what am I forgetting that would impact whether or not the attack hits?
Bear Soup Guy: Rhu's defense stat
Frezak (GM): Is this leap a shift?
Or a leap?
Bear Soup Guy: Oh I'm sure his reflex is higher than 11
Apheori (GM): It seems to be a leap.
What does that mean?
Frezak (GM): It's a jump.
But I would normally get an opportuniy attack as he goes past.
And he has -2 to attack Rhu.
Because I marked it.
Ganelon: There's virtually no chance that this hit Rhu on a roll of 3.
He's a dex secondary Avenger, right?
Actually that doesn't even matter. Int is their other secondary.
So either way he's going to have at least 14 reflex, and with the mark penalty that's not good enough.
Apheori (GM): Yeah, Rhu winds up with an armful of fluff.
Bear Soup Guy: Okay so
One part of my sheet says my staff is 2 attack 1d8-1, and another part of my sheet says it's 5 attack 1d8+4
Ganelon: That's because it can be both a weapon and an implement.
As a weapon it uses your strength modifier, so 1d20+Str+1/2 Level+Weapon Proficiency.
Which is 1d20+(-1)+1+2.
As an implement it uses your wisdom, which is much higher at +4.
Bear Soup Guy: Ah, okay, good to know
Ganelon: That said.
Bear Soup Guy: What are the rules for when it should be used as a weapon or an implement?
Ganelon: Based entirely on the attack.
The power will have either the weapon or implement keyword.
Greibel has a power for when he's in beast form called Pounce that replaces his melee basic attacks with a pounce that scales off of his wisdom rather than his shitty strength.
Actually wait, no. That's only for charging.
...So really, your melee basic attacks are always going to be weak and inaccurate.
Bear Soup Guy: cool
and if diagonal is in fact adjacent, should I need to move a square to use this reaction melee thing?
Apheori (GM): The sphinx is on top of Rhu.
Ganelon: Not if it's on top of him. Also, you can't really move on someone else's turn unless that's part of the reaction power.
Bear Soup Guy: It is not but apparently it's on top of him so okay then
Ganelon: Although it does let you charge, so if you were in beast form (you're not, though), you could charge and pounce as a reaction.
Apheori (GM): You're adjacent, I just cant show it because I cant move things properly.
This is all I can do.
Which is useless.
Bear Soup Guy: yeah, should've beasted over last turn
woo circle!
okay, I think I have enough information to roll a missing attack roll now
Thanks Gan, you are the awsomest
rolling 1d20+2 vs cat AC
(
6
)
+2
=
8
Apheori (GM): Miss.
Bear Soup Guy: lovely
Apheori (GM): You guys need will attacks. These things have crap for will.
Or a laser pointer.
Or colourful masks.
Bear Soup Guy: I'm planning on using my daily weird magic slowdown thing which attacks against will
oh my turn so I think I'll do that RIGHT NOW
Apheori (GM): Well, first the sphinx slides out of Rhu's arms.
Just so it's not on top of him anymore.
Now go.
Bear Soup Guy: Oh okay then before my turn
Apheori (GM): It's your turn.
Sorry.
Bear Soup Guy: Yeah but I have another encounter that the sphinx just activated by moving
http://gyazo.com/69c8557a944915223d233cd535fabf5a
Apheori (GM): It was a shift.
Bear Soup Guy: oh, is that different?
Apheori (GM): A waterfall of fluff.
I think so.
Bear Soup Guy: bah
Okay then
move one square and the Faerie Fire
120+5 vs cat will
err
rolling 1d20+5 vs cat will
(
6
)
+5
=
11
Frezak (GM): use Rhu's reroll power.
If that still works.
Apheori (GM): No, that's actually good enough.
Ganelon: In that case, eyebot shoots a laser.
Bear Soup Guy: Ah yeah, this cat is going down
cat is slowed and grants combat advantage
slow save triggers damage
actually that attack would have done damage even if it missed
it's such a cool power
Gaurav: "Well, first the sphinx slides out of Rhu's arms."
aaaaaaah
also: hi!
Apheori (GM): What's the damage?
And hi. You back?
Gaurav: I am~!
things ended waaay earlier than I thought
Bear Soup Guy: The damage if it had missed or the damage triggered by a save?
Oh hi Gaur!
Apheori (GM): Oh, okay, nevermind.
I misunderstood how it works.
Bear Soup Guy: Yeah, it's pretty complicated
Gaurav waves at BSG
Bear Soup Guy: cool so we can just keep going
Oh and that's the end of my turn
Sorry, I keep forgetting to end them
Ganelon: Aggravating Force.
This is just a straight-up bullet. It makes the target's AC a little easier to hit for one of you guys, though.
[Weapon Attack - Rifle]
rolling 1d20+3+5+1+0
(
13
)
+3+5+1+0
=
22
Vs. AC.
Apheori (GM): Yup.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d10+5
(
1
)
+5
=
6
Force damage, and... I was wrong, it has nothing to do with AC.
Next person to attack the sphinx gets a +2 to their hit roll.
I'm comfortable standing over here, so I'll end turn.
Apheori (GM): Dave is lying on the floor.
She says something about waffles, and then blasts at the eyebot.
Did the eyebot shoot the sphinx just now?
Ganelon: Nah, it doesn't shoot for Radek.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Ganelon: Which is kind of a shame, but them's the rules.
I do need to see an attack roll, of course.
Gaurav: That is a shame. You'd think that'd be like one 'if' statement commented out.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 +8 + 2 vs reflex
(
16
)
+8+2
=
26
Ganelon: Not even. All you'd have to do is add:
If (allies || radek)
What's the +2 from?
Apheori (GM): It's in the air.
Ganelon: So?
Apheori (GM): On the other hand, that might just cancel out her being on the floor.
She has a thing that adds to the roll against isolated targets.
At least I think she does.
On the other hand she just saw something move and threw something at it,so I'm not entirely sure that counts.
Ganelon: Can you tell me the name of this isolated target thing?
Gaurav: ally(Radek, Radek)
Apheori (GM): Heaven's Arrow
Gaurav: so rare you get to make a Prolog joke
Ganelon: So it's a... power?
Apheori (GM): Apparently.
She's throwing magicky stuff.
Ganelon: I can't even find such a thing on my builder.
Apheori (GM): Oh, the arrow is a feat. It applies to powers.
Ganelon: Well, whatever.
Radek's impressive reflexes aren't enough that a 2 would make the difference.
What's the damage.
?*
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d6+5
(
4
)
+5
=
9
Ganelon: It's busted.
Gaurav: darnit
Apheori (GM): And she loses her implement.
Since she wasjust sort of waving it around and then dropped it.
Dave: Waffles.
The porridge flattens itself out into a waffle shape.
Apheori (GM): Odds are nobody notices that, though.
Ellemerr: Everyone's killing the sphinx.
Gravy: Your turn.
Frezak (GM): I save against grin
rolling 1D20
(
20
)
=
20
Gaurav: While the porridge has a turn, could you please describe Dave's implement again? I've forgotten what it looks like.
Apheori (GM): Yes you do.
Frezak (GM): Second Wind.
Apheori (GM): A cane with an eyeball on the end.
Frezak (GM): Shift.
Gaurav: Thanks!
Frezak (GM): Mark.
Turn over.
Gaurav: So there was no response to Rhu's prayer to Hazz'ridan last turn, right?
I save against grin at the end of my turn, right?
Apheori (GM): Nothing immediate.
Rest assured he is watching closely.
Gaurav: Yay!
Did I really not suffer any damage when the sphinx jumped on me?
Apheori (GM): Dave didn't even notice.
Gaurav: Poor Dave.
Apheori (GM): The sphinx missed with claws and teeth.
Gaurav: YAY
Then Rhu strikes the sphinx with a bond of retribution.
Do I still get a +2 to attack the sphinx, or has that expired?
Apheori (GM): I think Greibel added a thing for combat advantage, and there's a mark.
I... really don't understand half of this. >.<
Gaurav:
rolling 1d20+5+2-2 Wisdom vs AC +2 weapon proficiency -2 grin
(
14
)
+5+2-2
=
19
that's the bits I'm sure about
if that doesn't work, let's add CA and see what happens
Bear Soup Guy: yeah it grants combat advantage until it rolls a successful save
Gaurav: so +2 CA from Greibel. I don't think CAs stack. So 21 should be the final number vs AC
Apheori (GM): And/or Radek's thing... it hits.
Gaurav: My maul crashes into its head
Ganelon: If you didn't count that? Yeah.
First attack gets a +2 to hit.
Gaurav:
rolling 2d6+4 Hammer damage
(
3
+
3
)
+4
=
10
Bear Soup Guy: I am learning so much in this battle, guys
Apheori (GM): The sphinx hisses and takes a swipe at you.
Do you do anything else?
BSG: I know, right? >.<
Gaurav: minor: I say some terrible things about the sphinx's mother.
move: naah.
rolling 1d20 save against grin
(
7
)
=
7
urk
end of turn
Apheori (GM): The sphinx looks confused at the terrible things about its mother, looks around, and then says, 'Story?'
Gaurav: huh
is there a story I can tell the sphinx in the ~15 seconds that a round lasts in D&D?
Rhu: The last man on earth sat in his living room alone. Then he heard a knock on the door.
Bear Soup Guy claps
Gaurav: end of turn
Apheori (GM): The sphinx demands a story. A proper story. The one about its mother. What is it? Tell. TELL.
rolling 1d20 + 8 against will compelling you to tell it.
(
12
)
+8
=
20
If you don't tell it, bad things.
Bear Soup Guy: "The story goes....MAMA SAID KNOCK YOU OUT!"
Gaurav: hahaha
Apheori (GM): Does that... 'hit'?
Does Gravy smack it?
Gaurav: I was going to anyway, but that totally hits.
Rhu starts making up a story about the an elven lady who inexplicably gives birth to an angry, unhappy, spoilt cat.
s/cat/sphinx/g
but each round in D&D is like 15 seconds or something, so it's going to take a while
Rhu: Once upon a time, an elven lady gave birth to a sphinx ...
The sphinx: That...
Is not...
THE STORY.
The sphinx sticks its face in Rhu's face.
Rhu: What story?
Which story?
It's a story.
It might be a good one. I don't know yet.
Apheori (GM): You mentioned its mother. Its real mother. The mothers of sphinxes. The origins. In your mind, you are compelled to tell it, but you don't know it, and the pressure builds...
Gaurav: o.0
Do I start getting a sense that this is what it means, or does it just hurt?
Rhu: Er ...
Um ...
Apheori (GM): Yes to both.
rolling 1d6 +4
(
5
)
+4
=
9
Rhu: There's a ... mother ... of sphinxes
she didn't, actually, you know. Give birth to them all. but she is all their mothers.
And they all ... love her?
Apheori (GM): STOP.
It's a psychic attack. You only get one try per turn.
Rhu: Oh okay.
Gaurav: Sorry, ooc.
Then Rhu flubs around trying to work a mother into the elven woman story and fails miserably.
?
was that 9 psychic damage?
Apheori (GM): For now you just take some damage and are dazed or whatever it is.
Yeah.
Gaurav: done. I have no idea what dazed does >.<
I've picked a random icon for dazed, but feel free to replace it if there's a better one I missed.
Apheori (GM): Combat advantage, can't take immediate actions or opportunity attacks.
Ganelon: One action per turn.
Apheori (GM): It'll end on the next sphinx turn.
Ganelon: In addition to what she said above.
Gaurav: got it. thanks!
Apheori (GM): Ah, right.
The sphinx will then glare at Rhu and hack up a hairball.
Bear Soup Guy: Roll to save
Apheori (GM): Greibel!
Bear Soup Guy: for the thingy thing
Apheori (GM): Oh, right.
d20?
Bear Soup Guy: I think so
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20
(
14
)
=
14
Bear Soup Guy: was it 10 or more to save?
Apheori (GM): I think so.
Bear Soup Guy: We are so good at this game
Apheori (GM): Totally.
Bear Soup Guy: okay
rolling 3d6+4 radiant damage to cat and it grants combat advantage till the end of my next turn but is no longer slowed
(
6
+
6
+
6
)
+4
=
22
Gaurav: WOAH
Bear Soup Guy: C-C-C-C-C-COMBO
Ganelon: Boom.
Bear Soup Guy: the smell of burning fur wafts through the air
If the cat's still alive I'll take my turn now
Apheori (GM): Yup..
Bear Soup Guy: Right-o
Gaurav: Why does it look like Dave's health bar is near zero? Did she burn through those THPs already, or am I reading something wrong?
Apheori (GM): Gravy's nameplate is covering it.
Ganelon: Yeah, she ought to be fine.
Gaurav: Ah, okay. Cool.
Bear Soup Guy: So how does charging work, and if charging uses the pounce power in place of a melee attack, does that mean the attack roll is against AC instead of reflex?
Frezak (GM): I'm gonna go now, Gan has my sheet.
Ganelon: It replaces the attack completely.
Bear Soup Guy: Adios Frezak
Apheori (GM): Aww, bye.
Bear Soup Guy: Okay, that still confuses me
So what's the benefit of charging with pounce as opposed to just using it as any other power?
Ganelon: You get a bonus to hit while charging, for one.
Gaurav: Not related to pounce, but lots of my powers get bonuses if I do them while charging
Ganelon: Moreover, it lets you replace charges with a power that scales off wisdom rather than the basic version which is strength.
You can't charge and use any power.
It's just ones that specifically let you.
Bear Soup Guy: OH okay, that makes sense
Thanks
Ganelon: No prob.
Pounce also does some other thing, I think, which makes it better than a basic attack
Bear Soup Guy: Grants CA to the next person who attacks
And I picture a charge involving the ability to move some squares as part of the attack, but am I totally wrong about that?
Ganelon: No, that's right.
You can move and then charge.
Even move backwards.
Bear Soup Guy: And that doesn't take a move action?
Not that it matters in this instance since I'm not gonna be needing an extra one
Gaurav: I think that depends on whether you need to move first in order to charge.
Ganelon: It takes a standard.
And it ends your turn unless you spend an action point.
Gaurav: if not, you can charge and then use the move. but I think you're too close to the sphinx to charge, so you'll have to move action to back away, then use the standard to charge in
Ganelon: So if you charge at the start, you aren't allowed a move or minor after that.
But you can move and minor, then charge, and technically move twice because the charge moves you.
Bear Soup Guy: Okay, awesome
How far back do I need to be to charge?
Ganelon: At least two squares. So back up 1.
Bear Soup Guy: Okay, once again I definitely have now accumulated all the information I need to get a 3 on the attack roll =P
Gaurav: haha
Bear Soup Guy: move back one, minor Wild Shape to turn into a bear or something, and then charge with pounce
rolling 1d20+5 vs cat reflex
(
14
)
+5
=
19
oh and +2
because CA
right?
Apheori (GM): Miss.
Gaurav: "bear or something"?
Bear Soup Guy: bah
=D
Gaurav: what about an ostrich? aren't they great kickers?
Bear Soup Guy: Yes
Apheori (GM): Otrich!
Bear Soup Guy: I've changed my mind and I am an ostrich
Apheori (GM): Ostrich
Bear Soup Guy: okay turn is over
if anybody has any powers vs will, we're gonna need those
Gaurav: It turns out ostriches are decent kickers: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L0HkAIyZRn8
Ganelon: I don't.
AC is the best I can offer. Have another bullet.
[Weapon Attack - Rifle]
rolling 1d20+3+5+1+0
(
19
)
+3+5+1+0
=
28
Rhu: Trust in Hazz'ridan the Great. He will keep our will safe.
Apheori (GM): Yup.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d10+5
(
10
)
+5
=
15
Much better than last time.
Rhu: niiiiice
Ganelon: And same as before, last attacker gets +2.
Gaurav: ooc, but it works either ways
+2 to ACC or damage?
ATT*
Ganelon: To attack.
Which is honestly way better than to damage.
Apheori (GM): That it?
Oh, Amadi appears sitting in midair where the eyebot was and shines a laser pointer on the sphinx when you shoot it.
Gaurav: ...
Apheori (GM): What?
Ganelon shrugs.
Gaurav: Nothing. I'm not sure why Amadi's oddness still surprises me, but there you go.
Ganelon: Well, she's covering for what my eyebot doesn't do.
I'll thank her for it later.
Gaurav: With a laser pointer.
Ganelon: That is all I do.
Gaurav: I mean, if the sphinx was looking straight at it, that would help, but unless you've got laser-guided bullets ...
Bear Soup Guy: I swear to god, if that laser pointer succeeds where fireballs and bullets have failed...
Gaurav: haha
I'm just waiting for Amadi to come in and restore the sphinx to full health
Bear Soup Guy: YOU FOOL
You can't give her ideas like that!
Apheori (GM): Dave will shout 'Waffles!' again and wave at Amadi.
Gaurav: We should really get Dave some waffles at some point.
Bear Soup Guy: Maybe they serve waffles at the sandwich bar
That's an excellent idea.
Apheori (GM): And then she'll get up and try to grab Grvy.
Gaurav: That's a _terrible_ idea, Dave.
Ganelon: That would be a strength + 1/2 level roll, against his reflex.
Breaking the grab is another matter. He could probably accomplish that easily enough.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 + 1
(
11
)
+1
=
12
Ganelon: Nnnope. 14 reflex.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
AGH.
Bear Soup Guy: the dead city is trying to fight back
Gaurav: it can try
Apheori (GM): Is this right? Where was eerone?
Gaurav: I wrote down a bunch of initiatives: Gravy - 18, Dave - 21, Porridge - 20, Cat - 8
Ganelon: Oh gods, I don't know.
Gaurav: It looks right to me.
And I'm glad Amadi's on the map.
go porridge go!
Apheori (GM): Okay, the porridge lets out a cloud of waffle-smelling dust.
Greibel and the sphhinx feel inexplicably hungry.
RHU.
Gaurav: A third bond of retribution at the sphinx: "Whirling divine energy promises swift retribution if one of your
foe’s companions attacks you."
Apheori (GM): It has companions?
Gaurav:
rolling 1d20+5+2+2-2 Wisdom vs AC +2 from Radek's power +2 weapon proficiency -2 got grinned at
(
10
)
+5+2+2-2
=
17
It doesn't, alas. Otherwise I'd get another benefit from this attack.
Apheori (GM): Miss.
Gaurav: It's a melee attack, so I can reroll.
rolling 1d20+5+2+2-2 Wisdom vs AC +2 from Radek's power +2 weapon proficiency -2 got grinned at
(
2
)
+5+2+2-2
=
9
HA
joy
Apheori (GM): Hi... just kidding.
Rhu: (to Dave) Are you okay?!
Gaurav:
rolling d20 save against being grinned at
(
7
)
=
7
Dave: Huh?
Gaurav:
rolling d20 save against dazed
(
17
)
=
17
Dave: Who are you?
Gaurav: so: no longer dazed, still grinned?
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Rhu: I'm Rhu. We've been traveling together for some time. We found you in a tank.
Gaurav: End of turn. I'm going to keep chatting with Dave, though.
Rhu: Remember? You rode around on Radek's disk and then flew into a wall.
Dave: Waffles?
Rhu: Greibel says there might be some in the pub with the sandwiches.
Apheori (GM): Gan: Will you play for Gravy, then?
Gaurav: Oh actually no I'm still dazed until the end of the sphinx's next turn.
Apheori (GM): Or should we give this up?
Oh, right.
Ganelon: I can play as him.
At this point there's really nothing to it.
Strength of Stone.
rolling 1d20+7 vs AC.
(
19
)
+7
=
26
Sphinx, of course.
Apheori (GM): Yup.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d10+4
(
5
)
+4
=
9
Gaurav: That's some strong stone you got there.
Apheori (GM): Shovel damage, I assume?
Ganelon: And Gravy gains 4 THP, which I can't put on him so that's up to you.
Yep.
Apheori (GM): Amadi shines the laser pointer on Gravy.
Ganelon: That's all.
Turn over.
Apheori (GM): The sphinx watches the laser pointer for a bit and then starts licking itself.
Then Amadi shines the laser pointer on it again and it flips out and jumps at Rhu to get away from it.
Gaurav: darnit
Apheori (GM): It likes you.
Gaurav: I know. That's why it's going to be particularly hard to kill it.
Apheori (GM): Why do you want it dead so badly?
Gaurav: ... for me. Rhu sees a giant wild animal jumping at his face and lets out a high-pitched squeal.
Ganelon: Because it does stuff like attack people?
Apheori (GM): You attacked it!
Ganelon: Sitting on Dave's face.
She freaks out.
It bites her.
Gaurav: If Rhu could sit down and think about it, he'd say it's 'cos it's unpredictable in warfare. We don't know if it'll help us or run away.
Right now, though, it's 'cos he likes Dave and thinks of her as part of the party now, and the sphinx -- who is definitely not part of the party yet -- attacked him.
Ganelon: Forget run away. I'm concerned it would hinder our efforts in a fight.
Gaurav: oh right sorry that's what I meant. attack us.
her*
anywho
one of the nice things about D&D is that no PC-led attack has to be fatal
Ganelon: This is correct.
Apheori (GM): I guess the sphinx mauls you.
Ganelon: You can just say "nonlethal damage".
Gaurav: I think we should get the sphinx's HP down to zero, then wait until Frezak returns before deciding if we want to kill it or ... I don't really know what the alternative is.
but that can be a decision for another day.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 + 11 vs reflex
(
10
)
+11
=
21
Gaurav: until the end of the sphinx's turn I am giving it CA
oof
hit
Apheori (GM): Is it -2 or -4?
Gaurav: +2 to the sphinx' attack
Apheori (GM): Oh.
Er, right.
Gaurav: 'cos I'm dazed
two sphinxes jump at me and I try to dodge both
Apheori (GM): One of them is actually Amadi.
rolling 2d8 + 8
(
1
+
1
)
+8
=
10
Congratulations, you get to live.
Ganelon: ...Yaaay?
I've saved a heal, at least.
Gaurav: you'd never have rolled a perfect d8 ... I hope
but a crit hit would have been fatal :(
Apheori (GM): Amadi shines a laser pointer in your eye.
Gaurav: ow
Rhu: Ow!
Gaurav: end of sphinxes' turn, I am no longer dazed. woo!
Apheori (GM): Yup.
Gaurav: Radek: I have a daily that I can use to spend a healing surge, so unless Dave attacks me, I _should_ be okay. I think.
... and of course it's possible that between Greibel and Radek, there won't be a sphinx left by the time my turn rolls around ...
Ganelon: Well, what else do you want me using the heal for?
Gaurav: Fair point, everybody is very healthy right now.
Ganelon: I guess if you go unconscious it would revive you.
Since it's not dead when you get negative HP, it's just dying.
Bear Soup Guy: oh, I guess it's my turn
Gaurav: A surge only gives me 8 HP, so your heal + my daily would get me up to 90%
I wonder if there's any way we can use the porridge's ability to make people hungry against our enemies
Bear Soup Guy: so can I just charge on pretty much any turn?
Gaurav: I'm a little surprised that Greibel can run in a straight line.
Bear Soup Guy: I think I'm gonna risk using my lousy staff on the knowledge that the sphinx has lower AC than Ref
Ganelon: Well, you would provoke an attack of opportunity for not shifting to move away from the sphinx.
And you can't shift far enough away to charge it.
But you could, say, shift away and then charge someone else.
Bear Soup Guy: bah, effort
Apheori (GM): Heh.
Bear Soup Guy: okay, minor to change back to elf then, and then I'll try Fire Hawk
rolling 1d20+5 vs cat reflex
(
3
)
+5
=
8
;_;
right, end turn
Apheori (GM): Amadi shines the laser pointer on Greibel.
Ganelon: More bullets!
[Weapon Attack - Rifle]
rolling 1d20+3+5+1+0
(
15
)
+3+5+1+0
=
24
Pow pow!
rolling 1d10+5
(
7
)
+5
=
12
Apheori (GM): It hisses.
Bear Soup Guy: That gun is so great to have around
Ganelon: Move to here.
And I won't heal Rhu this turn, I suppose.
Gaurav: Could you, though?
It'd help a lot!
Ganelon: You sure?
Apheori (GM): Amadi shines the laser pointer in Rhu's eye again.
Rhu: Ow! Again. Why?
Gaurav: Yes. It'd get me past bloodied, then I should be able to get to semi-full health by myself.
Amadi: Why not?
Gaurav: which will let me survive another 2d8 damage from the sphinx
Amadi pauses for a bit, then tries again and shines the light in Radek's eye.
Ganelon: Alright.
Gaurav: Thanks!
Amadi: Eyeball bot?
Ganelon: Surge +2.
Radek: Gah!
Gaurav: No longer bloodied!
Radek: No, that isn't how it works! Stop that!
Gaurav does the no-longer-bloodied dance
Amadi: How?
How does it work?
Amadi turns upside-down, facing Radek.
Radek: Ask me later!
Amadi: It's later now.
And now.
And also now.
Radek: Ask me never and I will /tell/ you the answer at my own discretion.
Gaurav: It could be Radek's last words to Amadi.
Apheori (GM): Amadi's turn?
Ganelon: Well I hope you aren't asking me.
Apheori (GM): Hmm.
I don't know.
Dave picks up the sphinx.
Gaurav: So Amadi did nothing?
Amadi shines a laser pointer in Dave's eye.
Apheori (GM): Pretty much.
Gaurav: If she gets entangled with that sphinx again ...
Rhu: Don't pick him up! He's dangerous!
He was attacking you not five minutes ago!
Apheori (GM): Well, she's still stoned.
Dave: He? Who?
You?
Rhu: Devourer! The sphinx!
Dave: It is you.
You're not here.
This isn't here.
Rhu: Um.
Dave: This.
Dave shakes the sphinx a bit for emphasis.
Rhu: It ... he ... was attacking you ...
Amadi shines the laser on Rhu.
Apheori (GM): ...and then Dave just stops, staring at the laser...
Rhu shields his eyes from Amadi
Gaurav: (or looks away etc.)
Apheori (GM): Dave screams and attacks Rhu. You may have an opportunity attack.
Gaurav: Against who?
Apheori (GM): Dave.
If you want to.
Ganelon: Just knock her out.
Apheori (GM): Since she's, like, attacking you.
Gaurav: Do I get one if she's attacking me? Wouldn't that just be a normal attack? It's her turn.
Ah!
Apheori (GM): It's a ranged attack.
Ganelon: This is correct.
Gaurav: I keep forgetting that.
So I get a basic melee attack?
Apheori (GM): If you want to.
Gaurav: OH
YOU KNOW WHAT
Resonant Escape
Lvl 2 utility, immediate reaction
Bear Soup Guy: That sounds promising
Gaurav: oh no ugh
it only works against melee attakcs
would have been perfect
okay, Rhu won't attack Dave because Hazz told him to guard her and all that
Apheori (GM): Gan: Will Gravy?
Gaurav: is there any way I can try to whack the thing doing the attack (her hand or whatever) out of the way without hurting her too much? If not, then Rhu will take it like an elf.
and will be super happy that Radek healed him up earlier
Ganelon: His will?
13.
Gaurav: no, he can opportunity attack Dave also
and he is not enjoined to guard her
Ganelon: Oh, I see.
Yes.
I could have sworn he got some thing for this.
Oh, there it is. Never mind.
rolling 1d20+7
(
17
)
+7
=
24
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 + 8 vs reflex on Rhu
(
2
)
+8
=
10
And Gravy hits her with a shovel?
Ganelon:
rolling 1d10+4
(
5
)
+4
=
9
Yeah.
We can assume all damage against Dave from Gravy and Radek is nonlethal.
So when she goes down, it's just unconsciousness.
Gaurav: miss
Apheori (GM): Amadi will shine the laser on Gravy.
The porridge won't do anything in particular.
Rhu will do something.
Gaurav: It must be pretty cold porridge by now.
Rhu will shift away from the action
and then attack the sphinx with my daily power: Renewing Strike
"You draw on your deity’s power to smite your foe with divine
lightning and to heal your injuries."
Apheori (GM): Hazz'ridan lightning?
Oh deary.
Bear Soup Guy: it turns all the sand it strikes into an impassable glass wall
Gaurav:
rolling 1d20+5-2 Wisdom vs Reflex -2 grinned at
(
7
)
+5-2
=
10
bah
but
it's a daily
hmm
my reroll power says "an ally within 10 squares" ... so I can't use it against myself, right?
Ganelon: Sadly no.
Gaurav: ah well
half damage then
rolling 0.5*(2d10 + 4) lightning damage
0.5*(
(
3
+
2
)
+4)
=
4.5
and I spend a healing surge
Ganelon: Rounds down, so 4.
Gaurav: bah
rolling d20 against grinned
(
6
)
=
6
BAH
end of turn
Rhu sulks.
Ganelon: Would you let Gravy restrain Dave, and if so, how?
Apheori (GM): Grab her and hold her?
Ganelon: Alright.
rolling 1d20+5 vs Reflex
(
3
)
+5
=
8
Mm, probably not.
Gaurav: Make sure Gravy renews his mark on the sphinx so it can't act out.
Ganelon: He marks in bursts, so he can actually get both of them here.
Gaurav: oh, sweet
Ganelon: And I think we have cause to believe Dave is no longer an ally.
Gaurav: I think she still counts as a deluded ally
Ganelon: Given how she's been attacking us all encounter.
Gaurav: and she is actually a drugged one
but restraining her is a good move
Ganelon: Still a justifiable reason to want her *not* attacking us.
Gaurav: oh yeah definitely
Amadi: Oh, is she still holding the sphinx?
Ganelon: She is.
Apheori (GM): Er, oc.
ooc
Right.
Okay.
The lightning thing wouldhave hit her too.
Gaurav: Oh. Then I'm glad I didn't do too much damage.
Ganelon: That's his turn over, though.
Apheori (GM): Sphinx bites Dave.
rolling 1d2 + 8
(
1
)
+8
=
9
rolling 1d20 + 8
(
4
)
+8
=
12
What does the mark do?
Ganelon: -2 to attack rolls and Gravy gets to interrupt that with another swing of the hammer.
But the -2 is always there. The interrupt is a Defender thing.
Well, I should be specific.
Apheori (GM): Bad news.
The sphinx is stuck to Dave again.
Gaurav: sigh
Apheori (GM): It got its teeth stuck in her dres.
s
Gaurav: how much THP does she have left?
Ganelon: Marks impose a -2 to attacks which do not include the marker as a target.
Apheori (GM): 1
Ganelon: Here's his interrupt.
rolling 1d20+7 vs. Fort
(
1
)
+7
=
8
Gaurav: does the interrupt ... interrupt the attack? if so, can you swing that hammer before the sphinx gets its teeth into the dress?
Ganelon: Pfft.
Gaurav: ... i guess not
Ganelon: Yes, that would be how it works.
If it worked.
Apheori (GM): Sphinx spends the rest of its turn getting its teeth out of Dave's dress.
Amadi shines the laser on Greibel.
Go.
Bear Soup Guy: Greibel attacks with his staff
rolling 1d20+2 vs cat AC
(
14
)
+2
=
16
Apheori (GM): Nope.
Bear Soup Guy: bugger
moves to there and turn done
Apheori (GM): Cat takes a swipe at you.
Attack of opportunity. Right?
Bear Soup Guy: I think so
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 + 8 vs ac
(
13
)
+8
=
21
Bear Soup Guy: hit
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d8 + 4
(
4
)
+4
=
8
Porridge also takes a swipe at you. Your leg feels sticky.
Gaurav: That's an adorable if slightly icky swipe.
Apheori (GM): ...by 'swipe', of course, I mean half of it climbed into your pants.
Gaurav: ew
Bear Soup Guy: like corn starch and water mixture floating on a speaker
Gaurav: on a speaker?
Bear Soup Guy: On a speaker!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3zoTKXXNQIU
Apheori (GM): Radek
's turn?
Gaurav: BSG: WOAH
Ganelon: Yep.
I move up to here.
Thundering Armor on Gravy, targeting the sphinx.
[Implement Attack]
rolling 1d20+5+1+0
(
13
)
+5+1+0
=
19
Bear Soup Guy: yeah, non-newtonian fluids are awesome
Ganelon: Fort.
Apheori (GM): Nope.
Ganelon: He still gets an AC bonus.
Turn over.
Gaurav: That is a well-fortified cat.
Ganelon: Seriously, what is the thing's fort?
Amadi turns over again in middair and then disappears, dropping the laser pointer on Gravy's head.
Bear Soup Guy: Higher than 23 at least
Apheori (GM): Something around there.
Dave... runs away.
Ganelon: Opportunity attack?
Apheori (GM): Taking the sphinx with her.
Yup.
Rhu: Um.
We kind of need that sphinx. For fighting with.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+7
(
18
)
+7
=
25
rolling 1d10+4
(
3
)
+4
=
7
Apheori (GM): All her THP are gone.
Ganelon: Where is she even running? We're in an enclosure.
Apheori (GM): Away.
Then she falls over for no apparent reason.
Well, aside from the obvious.
Especially since it was a pretty wobbly run to begin with.
Ganelon: Greibel.
Apheori (GM): And drops the sphinx.
Ganelon: You know what you must do.
Turn into dogs and dogpile her.
The porridge climbs Greibel and reforms on his shoulder.
Apheori (GM): Rhu.
Rhu: move 7 south
Radiant Vengeance against sphinx
Bear Soup Guy: Or turn into American Football players and dogpile her =p
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+5-2 Wisdom vs Reflex -2 grinned
(
18
)
+5-2
=
21
no CA against the sphinx, right?
Ganelon: Probably none.
Apheori (GM): Not that I can think of.
Gaurav: urk
Apheori (GM): And it misses.
Gaurav:
rolling d20 vs grinned
(
12
)
=
12
FINALLY
NO LONGER GRINNED
end of turn
Apheori (GM): Gravy time.
Ganelon: Could he, essentially pin Amadi to the ground like this?
Just another grab, probably, but still.
Apheori (GM): You mean Dave?
Ganelon: ...Yes.
That.
Apheori (GM): Sure, why not/
.
Ganelon: You have to move him over there for me.
Actually, if Dave's prone I think he can just stand on her and she can't get up.
Apheori (GM): Like so?
Ganelon: Sure.
In that case, sphinx shoveling.
Weight of Earth.
rolling 1d20+7 vs AC
(
6
)
+7
=
13
Apheori (GM): Nope.
Ganelon: Alas.
That's all.
The sphinx hisses.
The sphinx gets up and shakes itself off a bit and looks at Gravy with absolute murder in its eyes and pounces at him.
Ganelon: It's likely that Gravy looks back with just as much murder.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 + 11 vs reflex
(
19
)
+11
=
30
Ganelon: Hits.
As if I had to say it.
Gaurav: oof
Apheori (GM):
rolling 2d8 + 8
(
4
+
3
)
+8
=
15
Ganelon: Take that off his THP first.
And you have to do it, as before.
Gaurav: OOF
Apheori (GM): The sphinx then twists itself into a horrible grin again, but this time it encircles its entire body, swirling toothily from end to bloody end.
...as it slides back to the ground.
Gaurav: 0.0
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 + 5 vs will on Gravy
(
13
)
+5
=
18
rolling 1d20 + 5 vs will on Rhu
(
11
)
+5
=
16
Gaurav: My will is exactly 16. Is that a hit?
Ganelon: Hits Gravy.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 + 5 vs will on Dave on the off chance it matters with Gravy on top of her.
(
15
)
+5
=
20
Gaurav: then: hit
Ganelon: Yes.
Apheori (GM): -2 to attack rolls, save ends.
Greibel: You're up.
Ganelon: How has this fight even gone on for so long?
Apheori (GM): Sphinx is overpowered, people are slow, and I'm a terrible dm.
Bear Soup Guy: thorn whip in the foolish hope of rolling a crit
rolling 1d20+5 vs Sphinx fort
(
15
)
+5
=
20
Gaurav: I think it's mostly the Dave complexity (do we attack her or not, does she interfere or not) and the fact that while victory is pretty inevitable now, we're all out of dailies so we have to kill it with a hundred cuts now.
Amadi flashing frickin' laser beams into our eyes doesn't help.
Apheori (GM): Yeah, that misses.
Bear Soup Guy: Complexity smhmexity, Dave's been pretty well protected for most of the fight
Gaurav: That's what I mean: if she was just clearly the enemy (instead of the reason we got into this fight in the first place), we wouldn't be helping her stay alive.
Bear Soup Guy: alright, turn done
Gaurav: so she'd be dead or unconscious and not a factor in the battle earlier
Bear Soup Guy: ah, good point
Ganelon: Well I'm banking entirely on the "knock her unconscious" plan.
Apheori (GM): Do it!
Ganelon: I have to keep shooting the sphinx as one of the guys who can actually hurt it, though!
Gaurav: we've been knocking on the sphinx for ages ... it must be running out of HP by this point. I think I'll keep focussing on that.
Apheori (GM): Then shoot it!
Bear Soup Guy: "one of"
Ganelon: I shoot it!
[Weapon Attack - Rifle]
rolling 1d20+3+5+1+0
(
2
)
+3+5+1+0
=
11
Bah.
Apheori (GM): Miss.
Gaurav: you wouldn't want to reroll that, do you?
Ganelon: Then I'll move over here and pick up my poor Eyebot.
Uh... sure.
Gaurav: I think we're all out of dailies and encounters, right? So no use saving it up?
Ganelon: If we have nothing left but at-wills, mine do the most damage.
Gaurav: exactly. do it.
Ganelon: Okay.
[Weapon Attack - Rifle]
rolling 1d20+3+5+1+0
(
14
)
+3+5+1+0
=
23
Much better.
Apheori (GM): AC? Yeah.
Bear Soup Guy: I've got a couple encounters left but they're reactions and really aren't effective unless I hit something with other attacks anyway
Ganelon:
rolling 1d10+5
(
2
)
+5
=
7
Next attack, +2, same as usual.
Gaurav: Daaaaaaaave
Ganelon: And yeah, I'll retrieve the eyebot that I seem to have lost the ability to select.
Turn over.
Apheori (GM): Dave stares at the colours and tries to figure out what she's seeing through them.
Ganelon: It's Gravy's legs.
Apheori (GM): Can she even do anything with Gravy there?
Ganelon: Let me look something up.
She can attack, that I know.
"If your space is occupied by
another creature, you can shift 1 square, as part of
this move action, to stand up in an adjacent unoccupied
space. If your space and all adjacent squares are
Ganelon: occupied by other creatures, you can’t stand up."
Standing will take her move action, though.
And she'll still be next to Gravy after that.
Apheori (GM): She does that.
And then she just stares at him.
Ganelon: Gravy doesn't get moved away, though.
She just moves off him.
Rhu: Does Gravy get an opportunity attack if she moves out from under him?
Gaurav: sorry ooc
Apheori (GM): That was just so I could get to her thing.
Ganelon: Yeah.
And no, he doesn't.
Because this is a shift.
Dave: Everything is wrong.
Ganelon: If it were a Move, she could go further than one square and he would.
Apheori (GM): She doesn't actually do anything else, though.
Porridge doesn't do anything either.
Rhu.
Gaurav: oh right shift
so dave did move into that square, right? she's not still under gravy?
urk
Apheori (GM): Right.
Gaurav: Rhu moves one square south and attacks the sphinx with Radiant Vengeance
rolling d20+5+2-2 Wisdom vs Reflex +2 from Radek -2 grinned
(
8
)
+5+2-2
=
13
urk
Ganelon: Why are you even doing reflex attacks, dude?
Gaurav: because with Dave blocked me, I can't get in close enough to do melee
Ganelon: We know its reflex is impossibly high and its AC is not.
Sure you can.
You don't need to be afraid of a squishy caster's opportunity attacks.
She doesn't even have a weapon.
Gaurav: hmm okay
I'll try that next time
end of turn
Ganelon: She tried to punch you earlier and it had no bonus to hit, and would have done 1d4-1 damage.
Gravy, more of the same. Shovelings.
He'll shift down 1 first.
Apheori (GM): Left or right?
Ganelon: Oh, is he...
R20's messing up for me again.
Never mind the shift, then.
Apheori (GM): >.<
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+7 vs AC
(
11
)
+7
=
18
Apheori (GM): Mope.
N
ope
Ganelon: End turn.
Apheori (GM): Sphinx bites at Gravy.
rolling 1d20 + 8 vs ac
(
10
)
+8
=
18
Ganelon: That's a miss.
Apheori (GM): Then it backs away along... er... I guess there's a wall there.
Ganelon: Shift or move?
Apheori (GM): Shift.
Ganelon: Alright.
Apheori (GM): Greibel!
Ganelon: Poor Greibel can't do anything like this.
Bear Soup Guy: I can attempt a charge with my staff I guess
Speed is just high enough
Ganelon: You can just move first, you know.
Bear Soup Guy: er yeah, speed is high enough to move
Ganelon: Like that.
Bear Soup Guy: OH!
That is exactly what I'll do
And the charge adds +2 to attack right?
Ganelon: Just +1, unfortunately.
Bear Soup Guy: ah, okay, still something
Ganelon: You could also do this as some form of animal, mostly just to look less silly.
Gaurav: A roadrunner!
Bear Soup Guy: pah, Greibel concerned with looking silly? =P
Gaurav: Does Greibel still toke while in animal form?
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20+2+1 vs sphinx AC
(
10
)
+2+1
=
13
Ganelon: A fair point.
Bear Soup Guy: he eats little sugar cubes with LSD in them
Gaurav: aw, so cute
Ganelon: It's probably difficult to manipulate handheld objects as one.
Apheori (GM): Cute?
Ganelon: I would be shocked if he said that he didn't try at least once.
Gaurav: right, I was wondering if we could only transform into creatures capable of drugging themselves.
he*
Ganelon: Oh, certainly not.
Bear Soup Guy: A gorilla probably could /and/ would be badass
Gaurav: I'm imagining a savage dread bear covered in the blood of its enemies licking little LSD sugar cubes and seeing purple rainbows
Bear Soup Guy: Or an octopus if we were underwater
XD
Ganelon: If we were underwater, you would be the only survivor.
Bear Soup Guy: Okay, so 13 attack definitely missed
Remind me what kind of action a shift is again?
Gaurav: you can't shift, you've used up your move action
Bear Soup Guy: okay, that answers my question
Apheori (GM): Yup
.
Bear Soup Guy: end turn
Apheori (GM): RAAAIDECK.
Ganelon: Charging takes up all of the actions you have left.
Bear Soup Guy: Oh right, that too
Gaurav: it's a move action, instead of moving 5-8 squares you move a single space, but do it careful so as not to attract opportunity attacks.
Ganelon: You should have action points, though.
In fact, those are the one thing we haven't used up yet.
Radek shoots.
[Weapon Attack - Rifle]
rolling 1d20+3+5+1+0
(
9
)
+3+5+1+0
=
18
Bear Soup Guy: Yeah we do have the action points
Can those be used for any action?
Ganelon: Yes.
Bear Soup Guy: cool
Ganelon: Though standards would be the most efficient way of using them, of course.
That's still a miss like it was last turn, I take it.
DM? Hello?
Gaurav: Greibel: I think it's a good idea to stay there. Makes it harder for the sphinx to run away.
BSG, rather
Apheori (GM): Oh, sorry.
That misses.
Ganelon: AP and shoot again.
Gaurav: NIIIICE
Ganelon: [Weapon Attack - Rifle]
rolling 1d20+3+5+1+0
(
18
)
+3+5+1+0
=
27
Apheori (GM): That hits.
Gaurav: VERY nice
Ganelon:
rolling 1d10+5
(
9
)
+5
=
14
Good damage, too. Much better.
End turn.
Bear Soup Guy: Gaur: Yeah, might as well too since my strategy has pretty much changed to "HIT IT WITH A STICK AAAAAAAAAA"
Gaurav: Mine too! Mo' sticks mo' damage.
Bear Soup Guy: Oh NICE AP use
Dave: No, stop...
What are you doing?
Apheori (GM): She backs up and rubs her head.
Radek: I'm sending this awful thing back to where it came from.
Apheori (GM): Doesn't attack.
Dave: The stories.
It has the stories.
Ganelon: And it's just going to come back.
Dave: You're killing the stories...
Apheori (GM): Rhu's turn.
Rhu: It keeps attacking you. We can't have it attacking you. You're important.
Gaurav: Move to sphinx
Bond of Retribution
Dave: Heart and stone.
Gaurav: hey, I can't charge and then do an at-will, right? it has to be a simple melee?
Ganelon: Correct.
Gaurav:
rolling 1d20+5-2 Wisdom vs AC -2 grinned
(
13
)
+5-2
=
16
Ganelon: That's why there are powers which make an exception to that rule.
Dave: Error.
Error.
Gaurav: do I get a +2 from Radek's gun?
Apheori (GM): Nope.
Oh, maybe.
Ganelon: You do, but also.
Gaurav: OMG YES
Ganelon: Is that not a weapon attack?
Gaurav: +2 weapon proficiency +2 radek
20. boom.
Ganelon: The reason weapon proficiencies exist is because AC is normally higher than other defenses.
Gaurav: Unless you're ganging up against a poor, scrawny cat.
Ganelon: And almost all weapon attacks target AC.
Gaurav: is 20 vs AC a hit?
Ganelon: Yeah, a poor scrawny cat with fortitude that would rival the gods.
Gaurav: it feeds well.
Apheori (GM): I think so.
Gaurav: hahaha
Ganelon: Ties are a hit.
Apheori (GM): It needs that fortitude to survive the gods.
Gaurav: okay, so, assuming that hit ...
rolling 2d6+4 Hammer damage with maul
(
6
+
5
)
+4
=
15
Apheori (GM): Anything else?
Ganelon: AP and do it again!
Gaurav: seriously?
haha
Bear Soup Guy: ^
Gaurav: it is unanimous
Ganelon: Why not?
Gaurav: we should get APs and a TON of XP in the near future for sure
Ganelon: Unless you think we'll need it today.
And uh, if so, maybe using all of our dailies in one fight was ill-advised.
Gaurav:
rolling 1d20+5-2+2 Wisdom vs AC -2 grinned +2 weapon
(
5
)
+5-2+2
=
10
ulp
Ganelon: You tried.
Bear Soup Guy: ah well, good effort
Gaurav: hang on
Apheori (GM): Gravy?
Gaurav:
rolling d20 against being grinned
(
10
)
=
10
does that work?
Ganelon: Yes.
Gaurav: whee!
Ganelon: A 10 is exactly good enough.
Rhu looks down at the cat, proud of his attack.
Ganelon: Gravy also saves at the start of his turn.
rolling 1d20
(
10
)
=
10
Rhu: (to Dave) Sorry, you were saying?
Ganelon: Fancy.
Shoveltime.
rolling 1d20+7 vs AC
(
8
)
+7
=
15
Bluh.
Apheori (GM): Dave doesn't answer, and that misses.
Ganelon: AP and another, 'cause why not.
[Weapon Attack - Rifle]
rolling 1d20+3+5+1+0
(
4
)
+3+5+1+0
=
13
Wait, wait.
That's not even Gravy. That's Radek's attack button.
rolling 1d20+7
(
10
)
+7
=
17
Ganelon: There. And another miss.
Rhu: It's hard to hit a cat with a shovel.
Ganelon: That is all.
Apheori (GM): Sphinx attacks gravy.
rolling 1d20 + 11 vs reflex
(
8
)
+11
=
19
Ganelon: Hit.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 2d8 + 8
(
4
+
2
)
+8
=
14
Ganelon: Once again you'll have to take the damage off.
Gaurav: oof
Apheori (GM): Another grinslide back to the ground, this one somehow even more horrible than the previous, as though the creature is becoming all grin, and somewhat transparent and smoky.
rolling 1d20 + 5 vs will on Gravy
(
6
)
+5
=
11
rolling 1d20 + 5 vs will on Rhu
(
6
)
+5
=
11
Ganelon: Miss.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 + 5 vs will on Greibel
(
15
)
+5
=
20
Bear Soup Guy: baaaaaaaaaaaaah
hit
Gaurav: miss
Apheori (GM): So that's -2 to attacks.
Gaurav: 'dyu know what, I'd feel slightly worse about attacking the sphinx if he'd bothered to grin at any of the enemies we've faced so far
... or did he and I forgot?
Apheori (GM): There only was one fight.
Ganelon: Never to any meaningful effect I could recall.
Gaurav: He attacked a skeleton, but I don't recall a brain-twisting grin.
Bear Soup Guy: what's the name of the effect that does the -2
Apheori (GM): Grin.
Oh, the effect...
Uh...
Ganelon: Effects don't have names.
Gaurav: I like to imagine that people who have been grinned are forced to grin until saved.
Ganelon: Rattled is probably the closest.
Bear Soup Guy: oh okay
Ganelon: Rattling being a fear-based keyword on certain powers that makes them impose a -2 attack penalty on things they hit.
It's not save-ends, though.
I should say, most effects don't have names.
Apheori (GM): It's possible this was supposed to be that and I forgot.
Oh well.
Ganelon: Obviously things like Slowed or Immobilized do.
Apheori (GM): The sphinx now does something horrible at Gravy.
Ganelon: With what actions?
Apheori (GM): Action point sort. I dunno.
Gaurav: uh oh
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 +6 vs fortitude
(
3
)
+6
=
9
Ganelon: Not even close.
Gaurav: phew
Apheori (GM): And nothing horrible actually happens.
Ganelon: I would appreciate knowing what it attempted to do, though.
Apheori (GM): It tried to eat his soul.
Ganelon: Marvelous.
Gaurav: Yum.
Apheori (GM): Greibel.
Bear Soup Guy: oop
right, need to roll crit to do any damage so
I shall use Second Wind
Ganelon: Wait, what?
You're at full health.
Bear Soup Guy: I got 8 taken off earlier actually
Ganelon: Oh.
Go for it, then.
Also, I have a request.
Bear Soup Guy: So now I'm at full health I guess
And also +2 to defenses
Ganelon: Could you shift back a little and use your utility?
Bear Soup Guy: Sure, where to?
Ganelon: Uh...
Just somewhere up around Radek. It makes a zone.
A zone of total concealment.
Bear Soup Guy: Oh the stealth one?
okay will do
Ganelon: Yeah, but concealment is powerful defensively too.
Bear Soup Guy: oh, right on
Ganelon: Sorry, it's... "heavily obscured".
Still, means almost the same thing.
Bear Soup Guy: burst two within ten squares, so I stand within two squares of Radek?
Ganelon: No, no.
You just might want to back up from the Sphinx.
It's a Burst 2 area, with the origin within 10 squares of you.
This is a burst 2 area.
Bear Soup Guy: aaaahhhh, okay
Gaurav: are you trying to conceal the sphinx and people around it, or Dave as well?
Ganelon: So just draw one of those near him.
Gaurav: I'm a little worried what a concealed Dave could do.
Ganelon: Not at all.
Bear Soup Guy: so shifting, and then this thing let's see
Ganelon: I'm trying to get Gravy out of trouble.
Gaurav: you and me are going to heal him up though, aren't we?
unless I kill him like I killed Dave
Ganelon: With what?
Heal checks don't heal people in combat, they just allow someone to use their second wind.
Gaurav: oh! and he's all second winded out?
Bear Soup Guy: right okay that's move and minor
Ganelon: Yes.
Since you only get one.
And you took my last heal.
Understand now?
Bear Soup Guy: And another question
Gaurav: not completely :-P this is complicated
Bear Soup Guy: Do I understand correctly that rolling critical will do damage even if the defense is higher, or is that not a thing?
Ganelon: It was a thing in 3.5.
Bear Soup Guy: also don't know why I took back my second wind, I had the moves for that. Second Wind again.
Gaurav: so when you healed me earlier, I spent my second wind? And I'm second wound up too?
Ganelon: No.
I have a healing mechanic as part of my class that allows you to heal as if you spent surges.
Second Winds are available to everyone.
The Heal skill is also available to everyone, but only allows a target to use its second wind off-turn.
I didn't use my heal skill on you, I used an Artificer power.
Gaurav: Ah!
That makes sense.
Ganelon: You probably still have yours, but that doesn't do Gravy any good.
Gaurav: So I still have my second wind (you healed me once, and the other time I used a healing surge it was a side-effect of my daily), but ... right. Doesn't help Gravy.
Ganelon: Correct, but my heals don't consume your surges so you've only spent one.
Gaurav: dude, the eyebot just keeps getting better and better.
right. gottit!
Ganelon: That has *nothing* to do with the eyebot.
It's an unrelated science.
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Gaurav: yeah, I know :) I just noticed that the eyebot had picked up an "x" of some sort since I looked at it last.
Ganelon: Oh.
Gaurav: sorry, easily distracted.
Ganelon: Yes.
Bear Soup Guy: Yeah I found that cute too
Okay, Radek's turn
Ganelon: And now it's like the safari up in here.
And I'm hunting sphinx.
Gaurav: WOAH
Ganelon: [Weapon Attack - Rifle]
rolling 1d20+3+5+1+0
(
20
)
+3+5+1+0
=
29
Fuck yes.
Bear Soup Guy: I'd describe what all of that made me picture but it's too awesome for text
Ganelon: 15 damage and the same +2 to... probably Rhu's attack.
Tell me it's over.
Please.
Apheori (GM): It's over. The sphinx goes completely cloudy and then it is as though nothing was ever there.
Gaurav: clearly, coming up with a great one-liner before attacking something works extraordinarily well
Ganelon: Then I recommend we stop and deal with the aftermath when everyone's here.
Gaurav: given that you guys have been playing for eight hours straight, I think that's a good idea
Apheori (GM): You hear a voice on the wind that says, "One more for the collection."
And yes.
Gaurav: so we don't want to try to leave it unconscious but alive? Assuming that's even an option?
Ganelon: I don't think it's an option.
Bear Soup Guy: The priest mentioned that the sphinx couldn't be killed I think
Apheori (GM): It's not an option now.
Ganelon: Nor would I be inclined to show it any sort of mercy if I were aware that it tried to eat Gravy's soul.
And thank the gods that failed, because I don't want to be the guy responsible for making decisions that led to his character dying (or worse?) while he wasn't even around.
Apheori (GM): Heh.
Gaurav: He might have had words to say about that.
Ganelon: I suspect he'll have unkind words no matter what, but this is better than the alternative.
Gaurav: hahaha
well
the sphinx is gone
that's ... something
nobody died or had their soul sucked out, which is even better
Apheori (GM): You've killed several important plot points.
I hope it was worth it.
Bear Soup Guy: Just tell him you killed a demon jungle cat with a shot right between the eyes while on safari and he'll surely forgive you
Gaurav: ^
Ganelon: Time will tell, DM.
Gaurav: We've still got Amadi and Dave. Hazz'ridan didn't seem *too* fussed about the cat -- at least I didn't receive any obvious commands one way or another. Rhu will be sad but he will also sleep (much, much) easier.
Apheori (GM): Have you?
Ganelon: Well he's *here*.
She. Dave.
Is here.
Apheori (GM): Aye.
Ganelon: Unless you want to nitpick about the hallucinations.
Gaurav: ... are we actually out of initiative? Or is Dave still in initiative?
Ganelon: Most likely out of it
Gaurav: phew
Apheori (GM): Out.
Gaurav: I'm just a little scared that the next time I bring home a sphinx, they'll probably kill me *before* they skill the sphinx
kill*
Ganelon: Your text could use work.
Bear Soup Guy: My handwriting is just as bad
Apheori (GM): "I say! Smashing!"
Gaurav: Needs a classy Victorian moustache.
instead of the Gandalf beard he's got going on
Ganelon: I totally didn't ask for the instantaneous underbrush just so I could roll a headshot and look cool.
There was a tactical benefit to it which just didn't become relevant.
Bear Soup Guy: And yet, here we are
Ganelon: Currently I have no regrets.
That may change when Apheori tells me next session that the world is doomed because we killed a sphinx.
Gaurav: HA
THE WORLD IS ALREADY DOOMED
Ganelon: Or The sphinx. I've no clue.
Gaurav: so it really can't make that much of a difference
Ganelon: Well, you've got me there.
Bear Soup Guy: Yeah, I'm pretty sure we just dispensed one problem in favor of several larger ones sprouting up
Gaurav: a sphinx. there were others where I met him. This one might hav been particularly important, though.
Ganelon: Yeah. So he might have been The sphinx.
Anyways, apparently I have somewhere I need to be even though it's like 8 PM here.
So I'll see you guys later.
Bear Soup Guy: Adios, thanks for all the help today
Gaurav: Bye, Gan! Have a great 8pm thing!
Ganelon: No prob
Gaurav: It looks like everybody might have left, but if not, thanks for a brilliant bunch of gaming yesterday and today and putting up with my running off at random times! See you all next week!
Bear Soup Guy: Bye Gaur and likewise!
And by everyone else who already left!
Gaurav: :) bye, BSG!

Session 18

Gaurav: I'M HERE
Apheori (GM): Get on skype. We're sortng out what to do.
Ganelon: So I guess I'm going to become the most level-headed character in the group for a while.
Ellemerr: Unless you find the Magic Keyword... yes.
Gaurav: Says the man in the monocle and safari hat.
Apheori (GM): Poor, poor Radek.
Ganelon: Does that thought horrify anyone else?
Apheori (GM): No.
Gaurav: Nope.
Ganelon: Great.
Bear Soup Guy: Things could be worse
It could be Greibel
Gaurav: I'm pretty sure there was a moment back there where people followed Rhu somewhere. As long as we can prevent such madness in the future, we'll be fine.
Dead, but fine.
Where is Frezak?
Apheori (GM): Well, Greibel is pretty reasonable.
Apathetic, but reasonable.
Ganelon: He's reasonable, he just... doesn't know when to draw the line and get serious.
Bear Soup Guy: Except when battling cats
Ganelon: Well, fair enough.
But he would follow Rhu.
Bear Soup Guy: Yeah, he would
Ganelon: And he would likely give Amadi his undivided attention.
Both of these things *have* been productive, admittedly.
Gaurav: It doesn't help if he pays attention to Amadi. We don't believe her because she's crazy, and we don't believe him because he's high.
Ganelon: But I worry for any future where they are done without careful consideration.
Bear Soup Guy: he'd get on his knees and crawl after the porridge if he thought it led to something interesting
Gaurav: what if it led to more porridge?
Bear Soup Guy: Well then that would just be the best day ever.
Ganelon: Sounds like a win to me.
Gaurav: Like with the signs in the lab. We just clean ignored both of them, which makes sense, but presumably that map would have led somewhere if we'd paid attention. And now we
'll never know.
Sorry, growsing.
Ganelon: Well, it would help if the map was visible to a sane person.
Kind of hurts their credibility when they say something's there and nobody else sees it.
Apheori (GM): Yes.
This is why the gods invented faith.
Bear Soup Guy: But everyone else should know better dangit
All sorts of stuff is there and isn't there
Gaurav: Yeah, but who knows how much else we're missing? Anywho. Hopefully here in this college we will meet people who make Greibel and Amadi look sane by comparison, and our faith in them will be restored.
Ganelon: That seems likely.
Bear Soup Guy: Hoping for more pigeon heads
Ganelon: Still, I'm playing a guy who has faith in nothing.
Apheori (GM): Not even himself?
Ganelon: Okay, almost nothing.
Though he wouldn't use those words.
Gaurav: Rhu trusts Hazz'ridan fairly absolutely, but he's given up on getting anything sensible out of Amadi. he still thinks she's brilliant and all-knowing and all that, just ... unlikely to say anything useful.
And ever since he nibbled on a mushroom and tranced through a Hole into an alternate reality, while Greibel ate more than that with essentially no ill effect, he now treats Greibel with a mixture of awe and fear.
Ganelon: That actually is quite impressive.
You would expect someone used to drugs that powerful to be incapable of functioning.
Mentally and physically, even.
Bear Soup Guy: Druids, man
Gaurav: What are the paragon paths for druids like? Can Greibel eventually become a God of Drugs?
Bear Soup Guy: I vote for God of Drugs
Ganelon: I haven't studied them like I have for classes I'm actually playing.
Radek could get a paragon path that lets him replace parts of his body with Warforged mods.
It starts you out with a Battlefist, even, which is essentially a giant robot hand.
Gaurav: how giant is giant?
Ganelon: The only Druid PP I remember is Blightbeast, which is about being a representative of the really nasty side of nature.
I think it's like Warhammer 40k Power Fist sized.
The daily power makes it shoot out like a rocket.
Gaurav: sweet!
Ganelon: I'll be taking a different one that's all about having huge amounts of robot minions, though. Sadly they won't be the kind that count as units, but still.
Gaurav: "count as units"?
Ganelon: In the sense that they don't occupy space, have health, or are able to be targeted.
For example, one of them is a power where you send an army of tiny robots to... I think it's a Burst 1 area, and they just swarm whatever's in there.
Gaurav: ah okay. I thought "minion" meant that they would act like D&D minions (1 HP)
Ganelon: Nah, though there is a wizard PP with a daily power that makes like five of those. Necromancy, in other words.
It's pretty bad, though, because they're just too easy to kill.
Gaurav: do they go after you in the initiative order? then they'd count as five standard actions before they get flattened.
Ganelon: Let me go have a look.
Burst 5 within 20, you must spend a healing surge to use the power, summon up to 5 minions in unoccupied squares within the burst, they count as your allies...
They don't have initiatives. You command them using your actions on your turn.
When you use a standard to make one attack, all the others can also attack a target as they see fit. They can make opportunity attacks and their basic attack immobilizes.
The summon takes a minor action, so you can summon them all and then make them attack before they can get smashed.
Apheori (GM): OKAY.
LET'S PLAY.
IS FREZAK HERE?
Ganelon: I see him not.
Apheori (GM): BECAUSE IT SAYS HE ISN'T.
Okay.
So y'all just beat a sphinx off Dave's head, only to wind up having her start attacking you too. Fortunately, you were able to kill the sphinx, or something - it disappeared, at any rate.
Frezak (GM): Did we kill Dave?
Ganelon: And Dave stopped attacking us.
Frezak (GM): Or at least remove her arms?
Ganelon: Nah, she just kinda stopped and we ignored her.
Frezak (GM): And take her weapon/s away.
Gaurav: Disappeared in a puff of smoke, right?
Ganelon: She said some ominous things.
Bear Soup Guy: we killed the stories
Apheori (GM): Now y'all find yourselves standing around a suddenly calm courtyard. Gravy is a bit clawed. The porridge fell off Greibel. Dave is standing off to the side pointing at Rhu looking very confused, but she isn't attacking.
Her weapon is on the ground by Radek.
Frezak (GM): OH GODS WHERE ARE MY HP
Ganelon: The overgrowth, sadly, disappears.
I TOLD YOU
Frezak (GM): How many surges should I be at?
Ganelon: You can only spend like one per fight.
Since my heals don't take them.
I actually can't select the eyebot anymore, so if someone could remove that, it would be appreciated.
Frezak (GM): I'm.... 37 HP down >.>
Ganelon: Radek picked it up for fixing later.
Bear Soup Guy: YOU WERE OUR HEROIC TANK
Ganelon: Just be glad you didn't get downed!
Frezak (GM): I get to roll two times for death saves if I want.
Rhu pokes at the space where the sphinx was a minute ago
Frezak (GM): I WILL SPEND SOME SURGES.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+12 perception check on the space where the sphinx was
(
10
)
+12
=
22
Greibel shoots Radek a thumbs-up for great teamwork
Apheori (GM): It smells like old bones and dish soap.
Dave: Everything stays in motion, everything comes around. Need to stay in motion.
To stop is to stop. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have. Now I know. I've always known.
Where is it?
Frezak (GM): Does she still have a weapon/implement?
Radek leans his rifle against his shoulder proudly.
Ganelon: Nah, that's near me.
Rhu gestures to Radek to pick up Dave's implement before Dave notices
Ganelon: Sure, I'll do that.
I don't know how much good it'll do given how she just made it appear last time.
Bear Soup Guy: I'll walk over cautiously to check on Dave
Frezak (GM): Quick! Disenchant it!
SHE CANNOT WIELD DUST
PROBABLY.
Gaurav: Gan: hah, fair point
Ganelon: That takes like 10 minutes.
...I do need more dust, though...
Frezak (GM): Dussssst
Apheori (GM): Dave will stare at, and possibly through, Greibel.
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20+10 insight check on Dave (because insight is for people, right?)
(
3
)
+10
=
13
Ganelon: Insight is for reading people's faces, emotions, etc.
Apheori (GM): She's stoned.
Ganelon: So yeah.
Bear Soup Guy: okay thought so
Rhu: yeah, Heal for health.
Gaurav: sorry ooc
Apheori (GM): And probably not even seeing the same things you are.
Frezak (GM): So what do we do with her?
Just tie her to a tree ?
Apheori (GM): Can I get an Amadi?
Greibel calls out for Amadi
Gaurav: Rhu is bound to protect/stay with her and Amadi. Hazz' says so.
Ellemerr: I am here, I am so here, I did not get distracted by that youtube link at all!
Apheori (GM): Dave needs to ask you something.
Bear Soup Guy: Oh did Hazz want Amadi protected as well?
Staying with her at all times is a bit more...difficult
(To Rhu): Good.
Gaurav: His exact words: "She and Amadi are mirrors, keys. Guard them. They will see you through."
Ellemerr: Is she sitting, lying, or standing?
Apheori (GM): Dave is standing.
Rhu looks skyward and raises a thumb in a "I got ya, Hazz'" gesture
Dave reaches up with a bloody hand and draws a smiley face on Greibel's face with it.
Frezak (GM): Yeah, but Gravy really doesn't care for them.
Given that they're not helping.
Ganelon: Amadi was last appearing in the air above the fight and shining a laser pointer on things in imitation of Radek's laserbot.
Amadi sits down cross-legged in the air in front of Dave, eye-to-eye level. She's wearing a fake moustache.
Greibel blinks
Amadi stares intently at Dave.
Dave looks at Amadi for a moment, suddenly looking perfectly normal and sane, as though this is all just right.
Amadi: ... You still have mushroom in you. But it's not filling the holes. Not filling the holes at all.
Dave: We've been here before. All of this has already happened. Who are you?
Rhu kneels down where the sphinx vanished and says a prayer for its soul. Which thankfully means he misses all that with the blood and smiley faces.
Amadi: I am you as you shouldn't be and her as she wanted to be and me as I'll never become.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You get a vision of a grin going calm.
Dave: I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done that.
Didn't think. Can't look back.
Amadi: "The rock is split. Might as well carve it as cry over it."
Dave: The stories already died.
Rhu smiles. He says "I think Devourer is going to be fine, you guys", but too softly for anyone to hear him.
Dave: We played the cards to remake them, but they were just cards. It wasn't right.
Amadi: Or that nonsense about spilt milk, but I don't really like milk. Do you want tea?
Dave: Tea with milk.
Cream/
Put in a blender.
Amadi: I'll have mine with honey.
Frezak (GM): Mechanically, I don't think you CAN whisper without me hearing.
Apheori (GM): Gravy hears it! So does Greibel.
Frezak (GM): Yeah, my passive perception is good enough to hear whispers on the other side of a door.
Gaurav: Okay, Rhu didn't think anyone could hear him. He muttered it under his breath. If someone overheard him, then so be it.
... or indeed,if *everybody* overheard him. Stupid Gravyvision.
Frezak (GM): Nah, I'm just being picky.
Dave nods.
Frezak (GM): Gravysense!
Dave: Everything died.
Gaurav: Gravyfeels
Amadi: And yet here we are.
The Gravedigger: Well, /I/ didn't.
BARELY.
Dave: It always seemed like such a good idea, but everything changes after. I need to stop.
Rhu stands up and turns around
Dave: I need to start.
You... need to.
Or she does.
Amadi: She can't. Can she? Not while we're all...
Dave: Dead?
Rhu: Everything didn't die! Look at the flowers. Look at the birds. Well, okay, no birds. But there's a ton of pigeons in town.
Amadi: Drink your tea, dear.
Dave: She's not here. She's not even in the other place. With the pigeon.
200 feet tall.
Rhu: If you want some tea, we could go back outside to the sandwich pub. They might have waffles! You mentioned waffles earlier, Dave.
The Gravedigger: More guards than pigeons.
Dave drinks her tea, which looks suspiciously like something bought at a starbucks.
The Gravedigger: Are were-pigeons a thing?
or... pigeon were-guards?
Dave: If you make them a thing.
Gaurav: ha! is starbucks a thing on our home world?
The Gravedigger: Pigeons by night, guards by day?
Amadi sips at her tea, which looks like mist in a soup-bowl.
Dave: All you need is a card.
Dave draws a card with a sphinx on it.
Rhu: Seriously, no end of guards. I think it might be an epidemic.
Amadi: If all you needed were cards, would we really be here?
Apheori (GM): It wasn't us. We weren't the ones.
Amadi unfolds her legs from under herself and stands down on solid ground.
Dave: It wasn't us. We weren't the ones.
Apheori (GM): Oops.
Gaurav: okay, I was checking to see if I had an cards in my inventory, and I've just remembered we have a dead rat we found in the living quarter? Could we put Mr. Mousie into that? I imagine it'd been dead for a while though.
Radek: Oh yes, this town is clearly suffering from a dire outbreak of /order/.
Dave: This is the library. Keep moving. Keep moving, don't look back. Keep moving.
Frezak (GM): You kept the rat corpse?
WEIRDO
Amadi: There's no going back. Might as well go forwards.
Ganelon: Why would you even keep a rat corpse?
Anyways, no, Radek is going to BUILD a body for the mouse.
Dave: Where is it?
Forward.
Miidnight.
Amadi: Midnight.
Rhu: Midnight?
Dave: That wasn't me.
Amadi points at a door.
Frezak (GM): USE THE MAGIC LIQUID METAL
HAve a metalloid Mouse.
(To Ellemerr): Normal door? Like the main door of the main building?
Frezak (GM): Liquid Mouse.
Gaurav: Gan: we might need to bribe a snake.
Amadi: What time is it?
(To Ellemerr): Because something horrible is about to charge out of it.
Amadi looks worridly at everyone.
(From Ellemerr): That's up to you, now, innit~?
Rhu looks expectantly at Radek, as the person most likely to have something technologic-y with a time on it.
Apheori (GM): There's a loud crash and suddenly a giant deformed gorilla monster charges out of the door Amadi was pointing at.
Ganelon: It's, uh...
The Gravedigger: Is that normal?
Ganelon: Gorilla time.
Amadi: ... Yes. That's what I thought.
The Gravedigger: How do we know if that's normal?
Amadi sighs.
Greibel: Luckily I'm wearing my war paint...
Gaurav: We should roll initiative first and ask questions later.
Ganelon: It might charge past us.
Gaurav: Which building (or what sort of building) was this door in?
Ellemerr: Main building. Main door.
Apheori (GM): Several wizards (they are obviously wizards because of their giant hats) run out after it waving mops and brooms and shouting various thing about how terrible this is, how great, what are we doing? Oh look daffodils!
Rhu grimaces and shakes his head unhappily. "Wizards", he mutters.
Amadi watches the spectacle with a sort of bemused expression before eventually getting distracted by a butterfly.
Ellemerr runs to check on her clothes.
Scruffy-looking wizard: Noo! It can't escape! All this work!
Gaurav: So do we want to take evasive action, or just wait and see what the monster and wizards do?
Important-looking wizard: You idiots! I'll handle this!
Important-looking wizard throws the mop as the gorilla monster barrels into a tree.
Ganelon: Evasive action would be great if it's heading towards us.
Frezak (GM): How can we tell he looks important?
Apheori (GM): It's not.
His hat is bigger than all the others.
Ganelon: His beard is larger. Duh.
Apheori (GM): ...that too.
Frezak (GM): Of course.
His staff has a bigger knob?
Ganelon: I can likely speak to these people with great authority.
Apheori (GM): The gorrilla isn't headed toward you. It runs into the tree, falls down, and lies there as all the wizards crowd around it.
Frezak (GM): Radek can talk to anyone with a belief of authority.
That's how Radek talks;
Apheori (GM): A vague-looking wizard wanders away from the group after Amadi.
Gaurav: Everybody but Dave has healed up. Should we try to talk her into doing this, or can we compel her to heal herself somehow?
Ganelon: Well sure, but here it'll be *acknowledged*.
Vague-looking wizard: Butterfly!
Frezak (GM): Okay, so Ridcully, the Bursar...
Radek joins the wizards in their observation of the gorilla.
Frezak (GM): Senior Wrangler? Does one of them look like a horse?
Gardener runs out of the building after them, stops, then turns around and goes back inside.
Apheori (GM): Sure, why not.
Frezak (GM): I'm all for spectating.
Rhu wanders away from the group, muttering something about how a pile of cats would be more helpful than a wizard. Instead, he'll look up at the buildings and the campus.
Radek: What's this, then? An experiment?
Test subject, perhaps?
Scruffy-looking wizard: And experiment? AN EXPERIMENT?
Why, this is nothing less than-
Important-looking wizard: It was supposed to be dinner.
Radek scoffs.
Ellemerr comes back from her clothes and promptly falls over laughing.
Scruffy-looking wizard: No, it wasn't! THIS was the greatest thing-
Another wizard: Is that a claw in its spleen?
Amadi quickly nicks the vague-looking wizard's hat while he's distracted by the butterfly.
Another other wizard: Oh, will you look at that.
It's got a spleen in its hoof.
Another wizard: These readings! My gods, this is an achievement!
What configuration did you use?
Vague-looking wizard: Smell!
Ganelon: Does he have a device, perchance?
Vague-looking wizard: He's holding a fork.
Apheori (GM): He's holding a fork.
ooc
Amadi smells the butterfly, which responds by landing on her nose.
Ganelon: ...Arcana. Is it *just* a fork?
Amadi sneezes.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+11
(
11
)
+11
=
22
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Ganelon: Oh gods.
Vague-looking wizard tries to grab and eat the butterfly, but misses.
Ganelon: Okay, insight now. Are they all crazy?
Frezak (GM): That is a dumb question, Gan.
Ganelon: Crazy according to Radek.
rolling 1d20+3
(
18
)
+3
=
21
(From Amadi): What do these guys look like... aura-wise?
(From Amadi): Particularly my guy :P
(To Amadi): Brighter than the guards and whatnot, but still fairly dim. Some really strange colours, though. Lots of weird things swimming about.
Gaurav: Crazy like a FOX. A demented, magical fox.
(To Amadi): Yours is the brightest and weirdest of them all.
(From Amadi): But of course.
(From Amadi): Followed how closely by Dawn?
Ganelon: The only things crazy about foxes are the sounds they make.
Dave: Did I stop?
Ganelon: Like... people dying. Horrible.
Dave starts walking in a random direction.
Frezak (GM): Foxes can speak in the tongues of HELL.
And no, not Basque.
(To Amadi): Well, dave/dawn is different. These are mortals. Dawn isn't.
Ganelon: Not Supernal either.
(To Amadi): But then, neither are your other companions...
(From Amadi): Huh. Fancy that. Makes sense, though.
Rhu notices Dave wandering off and shifts position slightly to keep both her and Amadi in view.
(From Amadi): Wait, what?
(To Amadi): According to their auras, they are, technically, immortals.
(From Amadi): WELL. Thank you for that info. xD
(To Amadi): Which is why I could have the sphinx try to eat Gravy's soul - it wouldn't have worked anyway. XD
(From Amadi): You're a mean and awesome lady.
(To Amadi): Thanks.
Ganelon: I still need an answer to the "Do the wizards seem crazy to Radek" question.
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Gaurav: Should we ask the pointy hats about the Holes? Or might that just worry them?
Apheori (GM): Not completely batty, but still...
A bit off reality.
Hearts in nonsensical places.
Weird motives.
Uncertain reliability and usefulness.
Another wizard: OH, LOOK, LOOK.
Ganelon: I guess that means I have to assume the prestigious position of BOSS WIZARD.
Another wizard: IT's blooooming!
Frezak (GM): I'm ready to leave!
Apheori (GM): The gorilla monster's belly starts to bulge.
Frezak (GM): Oh dear.
TAKE COVER
Ganelon: I take cover behind a wizard.
Vague-looking wizard: (to Amadi) You should eat that. Very bad things are about to happen, and you're too fluttery to take it.
Important-looking wizard: Oh!
Important-looking wizard pokes it.
Gaurav: Have Rhu and Dave wandered far enough away from the gorilla that Rhu can't see what's going on?
Amadi looks startled, for the first time ever.
Gaurav readies exploding sperm whale GIF
Apheori (GM): Only Radek can really see what's going on with it because of the wall of wizards.
Amadi opens her mouth for the butterfly to fly into, and tilts her head back and sticks her tongue out as if catching snow-flakes.
Apheori (GM): Dave walked into a tree and is now staring up at it as though considering climbing it.
Gaurav: Okay. Rhu pays no attention to proceedings then, but if the wizards start running for cover, he's going to grab Dave and pull her behind the tree.
Apheori (GM): The wizards all crowd in closer.
Gaurav: Wizards or party members. He's met wizards before. He's expecting explosions.
Apheori (GM): And stop chattering.
As though holding their collective breaths.
Ganelon: I take cover behind as many wizards as I can without obstructing line of sight.
Apheori (GM): Nothing happens for a bit.
Frezak (GM): I will find a large tree.
Ganelon: I'll attempt to steal the hat from someone in front of me.
(From Amadi): Unless you object to it or my methods, I eat the butterfly.
Apheori (GM): Roll a thingy.
Amadi eats the butterfly.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+6
(
5
)
+6
=
11
Aw.
Radek's actually trained in thievery because it's used for some mechanical stuff.
Bear Soup Guy: I will continue to observe passively from the spot I was standing in when the gorilla broke through
Apheori (GM): You get the hat but then the guy grabs it back.
Another wizard: Well?
Important-looking wizard: Wait for it.
Another wizard: Yes?
Scruffy-looking wizard pokes it with a broom handle.
Another wizard: Oh, I see! I see it now.
It looks just like you, Aaron. You must be so proud!
Scruffy-looking wizard: Oh, shut up.
Amadi suddenly turns and runs over to Greibel and attempts to climb his shoulders for a better view.
Amadi: (Or for fun. Or for cakes. Hard to tell.)
Frezak (GM): I'll go and pick up Amadi and hold her above me.
She can sit on my head and hold my horns.
Greibel holds Amadi's ankles so she doesn't fall off
Greibel like a child watching the Disneyland parade
Frezak (GM): I HAVE A SUPERIOR VIEW
GIVE ME THE MIDGET
Bear Soup Guy: Or that
Greibel passes her over
Gaurav: Greibel, if you've had cakes and been holding out on us ...
Dave climbs the tree and watches too.
Bear Soup Guy: Just "SOME USEFUL HERBS"
Rhu notices the silence and everybody trying to get a view. He crouches behind the tree Dave has climbed up and closes his ears.
Amadi: Wheeee~
Apheori (GM): Nothing continues to happen.
Gaurav: (unless there's a wall conveniently close by, in which case he'll hide behind that)
Apheori (GM): The suspense starts to wear off.
Amadi is having too much fun at her high perch to care.
Amadi rises her arms and exclaims "I'm the Queen of the Worlds!"
Gaurav: Where's the mouse forged?
Apheori (GM): Off on the ground somewhere.
The bulge subsides, and the creature lets out a dying breath and sags kind of horrible.
horribly
The Gravedigger: Ew.
Apheori (GM): The wizards all just stare at it.
The Gravedigger: That doesn't look healthy.
Important-looking wizard: Oh.
The Gravedigger: I wouldn't want to eat /that/.
Scruffy-looking wizard: No! All this work! AAALL THIS WORK!
Another wizard: What work?
Amadi "Wheeees" again.
Scruffy-looking wizard: You know, this work.
The Gravedigger: If you want to bury it, I can do you some good rates.
Radek: What was it supposed to do?
Scruffy-looking wizard: Do? DO?
Does this look like a mere DOING THINGY?
Radek: It looks like even less.
Rhu takes his fingers out of his ears, happy that the scary sound of expectant wizards has been replaced by the more normal sound of disappointed wizards. He stays behind the tree, every once in a while taking a glance to make sure the party hasn't left yet.
Another wizard: Someone opened the blocked off closet on the third floor.
Amadi: I WILL BOIL YOU ALL IN CHOCOLATE UNTIL YOU ARE DEAD!
Important-looking wizard: We were going to eat it.
Ganelon: Disappointed wizards are pretty calming.
Important-looking wizard: It got out.
NOW can we eat it?
The Gravedigger: (upwards) what about people that don't like chocolate?
Radek: Honestly, if it's sustenance you're looking for, why not just synthesize it?
Amadi bends over Gravy's head to give him a proper look at her perfectly mystified face. "Those people still exist? I thought they were a myth!"
Radek: None of this dreadful business with meat and bones to be concerned over.
Dave dives out of the tree.
Vague-looking wizard: Oh, look, lordy, it's gonna blow.
Scruffy-looking wizard: Well, we could...
The Gravedigger: (upwards)
All the myths are true, kid.
Important-looking wizard: Where would be the fun in that?
The Gravedigger: Somewhere.
Important-looking wizard: You need to eat things. Real things. Running things.
Frezak (GM): I'll jog to cover.
Radek: *I* don't.
Vague-looking wizard balances a mop on his head.
Amadi bends back to normal position and throws her hands in the air again and looks like she's about to say something but then she's just "wheee"ing some more at the jog.
Important-looking wizard: You need to hunt. To take life for your own. To get out and live!
Or get someone else to do it for you.
Apheori (GM): The gorilla thing explodes.
Frezak (GM): Gravy will comically tilt around a tree with his head barely visible, but a whole Amadi sticking out.
Like a hat.
Apheori (GM): Bits of it wind all over the wizards, Radek, and the tree.
Frezak (GM): BECAUSE OF THAT.
THANKS, TREE.
Apheori (GM): A huge chunk falls right next to Greibel.
Rhu: http://www.buzzfeed.com/kellyoakes/this-sperm-whale-exploding-is-incredible-and-horrifying
Gaurav: sorry ooc
Amadi whees even louder in an attempt at over-do the explosion.
Frezak (GM): Curse my 20 passive perception!
Gaurav: Did any of it make it to Rhu's tree?
Frezak (GM): My gravy ears!
Apheori (GM): Smaller bits then rain down on everyone's heads.
Frezak (GM): Not my head!
It's protected!
Apheori (GM): Rhu just gets rained on a bit.
Frezak (GM): By a midget!
Rhu sighs.
Apheori (GM): Gravy gets it on Amadi
s head.
Rhu walks back to the rest of the group.
Dave follows.
Amadi looks like the happiest person alive.
Rhu: This is what comes of fraternising with wizards. No offence, wizards.
Frezak (GM): I will go and inspect the meat chunks.
Do they look edible?
Ganelon: I will try to get them off of myself.
Apheori (GM): Strangely, yes.
Frezak (GM): I'll pick a bit off Radek and taste it.
Gaurav: Is that ... are Amadi and Gravy bonding over an exploded gorilla monster?
Greibel natures the chunk that landed next to him
Apheori (GM): The wizards are all standing as they were, and then one of them starts screaming and runs into a building, saying 'EEEWWWWWWW'.
Greibel:
rolling 1d20+12
(
12
)
+12
=
24
Apheori (GM): Greibel: It seems like it turned into cured ham.
Amadi picks bits off herself and tries putting them in Gravy's mouth.
Rhu sighs rudely, then closes his eye and says a prayer for the soul of the gorilla monster
Apheori (GM): Gravy: It tastes like ham.
Gaurav: eyes*
Frezak (GM): I will be... fed by this crazy midget, then.
Ganelon: I should hope there isn't too much on me since I was taking cover.
Scruffy-looking wizard: Well, that wasn't supposed to happen.
Important-looking wizard straightens up, trying to look serious despite his ample coating of exploded meat bits.
The Gravedigger: This would be a burial with scraping expenses.
Important-looking wizard: Jorm! Clean this up.
Important-looking wizard then strides inside.
Another wizard: Why me?
Wait, no.
Fre!
Fred. Clean this up.
Another wizard strides inside as well.
Amadi: Seems like a waste to bury it. Air burial! Or. Hm. If we all grow wings, it'll work! I swear!
Amadi turns towards the another wizard at the name "Fred".
Another other wizard: I am SO ON IT!
ON IT LIKE THE END OF THE WORLD!
LIKE THE WARDROBE OF A LUSTY COUPLE!
LIKE CAT HAIR!
ON THE BED!
AND THE SOFA!
Amadi almost falls off Gravy while staring intently at the another other wizard, before wordlessly trying to steer him towards it.
Rhu: Careful, The Gravedigger here is a burial professional. Don't disappoint him.
Another other wizard waves a broom.
Radek: Deranged to the last man.
The Gravedigger is steered.
Another other wizard starts pointing at random chunks of meat, waving the broom all the while, and they start disappearing.
Amadi wheees some more, before calling her Gravedigger to a half before the man.
The Gravedigger halts.
Amadi: Are you Fred?
Another other wizard: Huh?
Amadi: You don't look like Fred. Are you Fred? Someone said Fred! Are you Fred?
Another other wizard loses his concentration, and the meat chunk he was pointing at explodes instead of disappearing.
Another other wizard: I don't... what?
Yes?
Amadi: But... HE would never do what she did. So you're not... actually a - I mean, you're not FRED. Are you?
Amadi looks even more intently at another other wizard.
Another other wizard straightens up, dropping the broom and giving Amadi his full attention, and suddenly little bits of meat are exploding everywhere around him. A horrible and somewhat familiar smell fills the air.
(To Rhu): It smells like fish.
Another other wizard: I'm Fred, milady.
Ellemerr: What sort of somewhat familiarity are we talking here?
Scruffy-looking wizard: AGH! NO! NO!
What are you doing!
?
Rhu: ... guys ...
Amadi: ... What ARE you doing? Here?
Rhu: .... GUYS ....
Greibel: It's raining meat! Hallelujah, it's raining meat!
Rhu: ... DOES ANYBODY ELSE SMELL FISH?!?!?!?!
because I smell fish
Rhu looks around in a panic
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+10
(
17
)
+10
=
27
Smelling for fish.
Scruffy-looking wizard and several of the other remaining ones start waving their own mops and brooms, and it calms down slightly, but bits are still exploding.
Radek looks to Rhu desperately.
Ellemerr: I *love* these wizards. :3
Apheori (GM): Frezak: It smells like holes. The bad kind.
Rhu is looking ahead, behind, left, right, and -- more often than not -- straight up
The Gravedigger: Uh, guys?
I smell Holes.
Ellemerr: Sorry about calling Fred out, though. xD
The Gravedigger: Capital H.
Rhu: Why. Does. That. Thing. Smell. Like. Fish???
Another other wizard: Doing? I... uh...
Another other wizard turns bright red, oblivious of the exploding meat.
The Gravedigger: Someone find out what they're doing.
And possibly make them stop.
Ganelon: Yeah, I'm on it.
What are they doing?
rolling 1d20+11
(
15
)
+11
=
26
Scruffy-looking wizard: AWAY! AWAY! EVACUATE!
Amadi: You're not fixing anything. Isn't that what you're supposed to do? But you're not!
Apheori (GM): They're all running away now.
Rhu: (to Gravy) WHAT? WHERE?
Ganelon: I mean magically.
Rhu steps behind the nearest tree, wall or bush.
Apheori (GM): They WERE trying to dispell a runaway spell from the distracted Fred.
The Gravedigger: I dunno. Around.
Amadi gives another other wizard a burning accusing glare.
Apheori (GM): But now it's too out of hand to dispell. You sense impeding badness.
The Gravedigger: Evac time, kiddies.
Radek: Listen to the wizards!
Frezak (GM): I'll start moving away.
Scruffy-looking wizard grabs Fred and drags him away from Amadi.
Radek: Evacuate!
Gaurav: That is absolutely the worse kind of badness.
Amadi: You could fix it! YOU COULD -!
Gaurav: Okay, I promised myself I'd do this, so: could Rhu please roll a sanity check against going mad with fish-smell-induced panic?
Amadi seems to forget everything and goes back to "whee"ing as Gravy runs.
Apheori (GM): Do it.
Rhu:
rolling d20 sanity check
(
1
)
=
1
Apheori (GM): Some of the wizards summon portals and teleport out that way.
Gaurav: NAILED. IT.
Apheori (GM): Others just run away.
Frezak (GM): FOR FUCK'S SAKE, RAVE.
YOU ARE EXPENDABLE NOW.
Apheori (GM): Where they were is pretty evacuated now. Did everyone else evacuate too?
Ganelon: It's amazing how many 1s we've rolled on sanity in particular.
Ellemerr: I think Frezak evacuated Gravy and Amadi. xD
Ganelon: Radek would just run inside since he sadly has no portal magic.
Apheori (GM): Rhu summons a portal and evacuates through it as well.
Greibel watches everyone panicking and sits down to meditate
Gaurav: HUH
That was unexpected
Frezak (GM): I'll go and pick up Greibel.
And evac him.
Apheori (GM): Where do you go?
Frezak (GM): OUT
Ellemerr: What will we do without you?
Frezak (GM): Gates!
Apheori (GM): To the street outside the campus wall?
Okay.
Frezak (GM): Sounds good.
TO THE BEEEEEES
Ganelon: Hm.
Apheori (GM): You all evacuate through a swarm of bees, which definitely weren't there before.
Dave goes and sits cross-legged where the thing exploded.
Does Radek go into a building or out the gate?
Ganelon: In retrospect, let's say he follows Gravy.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
(From Amadi): I keep shouting at Kyrule behind her wheee-ing, in my head or somwhere. Though it might not even have been Kyrule. I'm very upset.
Ganelon: Because:
- The wizards are crazy
- Gravy is not
- These rifts likely do not care about physical barriers like walls
Ellemerr: I'd usually care about Dave but I'm on Gravy's back and that's a fun place to be. Is anyone else caring about Dave?
Ganelon: I'd say Rhu if he didn't just... hop into a portal.
(To Amadi): Why are you upset?
Ellemerr: Yup.
Ganelon: Greibel is pretty much doing the same thing as Dave, too, so...
Let's hope their madness protects them!
Frezak (GM): Gravy really don't care about Dave, no.
And Radek can hope that Gravy+charges is enough to fill a Hole.
(From Ellemerr): I don't know. She didn't expect to see him there, and she's a little... something because of her fractured mind. I don't know! It felt appropriate?
Gaurav: I don't suppose Hazz's command to protect Dave and Amadi would have led Rhu to pull Dave into the portal with him as he went?
Given, you know. Madness.
Apheori (GM): So things get crazy in the courtyard, but you're all out of it.
Ellemerr: She'll probably be fine.
(To Ellemerr): Ah. But that wasn't really him, just someone who happened to have the same name!
Ellemerr: *shifty eyes*
(To Ellemerr): She is so silly.
(From Ellemerr): I know! :D
Gaurav: I'm being kicked out of the room I'm in. I'll be back in a few minutes.
Apheori (GM): Gaura: No.
Gaurav: Figured. Worth a shot, though.
Frezak (GM): I'll peek around to observe what transpires in the courtyard.
Apheori (GM): There is a fine mist of meat everywhere.
Everything looks oddly thin.
Dave is just sitting in the middle of it, looking perfectly fine.
Amadi feeds Gravy another piece of meat that she found in her hair.
Ganelon: Gravy's such a nice guy.
Shame he's gotta go through all this.
(To Amadi): Will you shut up?
Frezak (GM): Yeah, I don't want to go back there.
Amadi: What? Why - you could've - why aren't you fixing things?!
Ganelon: Who is she talking to?
Ellemerr: She's yelling into the empty-ish courtyard.
Ganelon: Alright.
Frezak (GM): I'm glad that wasn't to me.
Ganelon: I need to be sure that nobody is accusing Radek of not fixing things.
Frezak (GM): Oh, and I'll put Greibel down now.
(To Amadi): It isn't time. You will know what it is. Midnight, yes?
Amadi: But that's never now! I've asked and asked and they're not even answering the right question!
(To Amadi): I know, love. You chose this.
Amadi: But I'm - scared...
(To Amadi): We all are.
Radek: Is she alright?
The Gravedigger: Yeah, all I got is sandwiches and shovelling equipment.
I don't know how to deal with melancholic magical midgets.
Apheori (GM): The gate shuts itself in a swirl of bees.
Radek: Arcana please.
Radek:
rolling 1d20+11
(
13
)
+11
=
24
The Gravedigger: OH GODS BEES.
Gaurav: "Amadi feeds Gravy another piece of meat that she found in her hair." -- I presume she still has blood in her hair? Bloody meat, mm.
Stupid bees.
Amadi blinks, then leans over Gravy's head again.
Ganelon: Is this about the bees?
Amadi: YOU aren't scared. Are you?
Ellemerr: No, her hair is fine now.
Except full of meat-bits, and I guess those might be bloody anyway.
Apheori (GM): Radek: When the gate shuts, it is as though the chaotic energy disappeared - presumably the courtyard is shielded, but oddly you don't sense that.
Gaurav: Ellemerr: oh, okay. My bad!
The Gravedigger: (upwards)
Not really
Ellemerr: She's confusing. It happens. Don't worry about it.
Amadi: That's... that's good.
Radek: Hrm...
Amadi: ... You should be.
The Gravedigger: You clearly need a shovel, kid.
Ganelon: How tall is the wall?
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You find yourself standing in a field full of big fluffy white things.
Roll sanity.
Gaurav: How's my sanity?
Oh right.
Rhu:
rolling d20 sanity check
(
19
)
=
19
Gaurav: definitely just the fish then
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You vaguely remember casting a spell you don't know, you realise that this is completely bizarre and that the white things aren't sheeps, but 3d paintings of sheeps, and the entire scene is really quite badly done. It seems stable, though.
Gan: Tallish.
You can
t see over it.
Ganelon: ...Can Amadi from her elevated position?
Apheori (GM): No.
Ganelon: Alas.
Ellemerr: Dave is still inside, yes?
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Radek: I think...
Apheori (GM): With the mouseforged.
Ellemerr: Fine company, at least.
Rhu looks confused, then reaches over and touches a 3d painted sheep
Apheori (GM): The sheep says 'baaa'.
Rhu: Oh, er ... hi.
Radek: Either the instability has passed, or this place is shielded.
Frezak (GM): The sheep says "END MEEEEEE"
Radek: Can you open the door?
The Gravedigger: They seemed pretty unfazed by it.
i'll give it a shot.
Frezak (GM): I'll... uh... try the doors?
Ganelon: That's half question, half request.
It might well be impossible.
Rhu looks around the field, looking for a fence or farmhouse or ... anything but sheep, really.
Apheori (GM): The doors buzz angrily as you approach.
They don't want you near.
Amadi buzzes happily.
Gaurav: Did all the wizards run into the buildings? None of them ran for the doors?
Ellemerr: I think most of them portal'd?
Apheori (GM): Rhu: There is nothing - just badly painted sheep, badly painted ground, and badly painted sky in splotchy solid colours. It seems to go on forever.
The Gravedigger: yeah, i'm not going to touch that.
Apheori (GM): Some ran into buildings.
Bear Soup Guy: look for the black sheep!
those always have the shinies
Gaurav: Huh. How many sheep can I see? Or do they stretch into the distance too?
And are any black?
I ... I like shinies.
Radek: Understandable. I have to wonder what's happening on the other side, though.
Frezak (GM): If I hold Amadi up above me, would she be able to see over the wall?
Gaurav: Gan: what about sending the eyebot over? Or did it break in the fight?
Radek inspects his damaged Eyebot, shaking his head. "...A shame."
Ganelon: Dave broke it.
And I did ask earlier - wall's too high up for Amadi.
Gaurav: Can you ssh into the Mouseforged and use its camera?
Ganelon: At least, for Amadi when she's obeying the laws of gravity.
Frezak (GM): Could I throw her over the wall?
Gaurav: What about Radek standing on Gravy?
Apheori (GM): Gaurav: You look for how many, and a number appears in your head - 6^6^6. You look for a black sheep, and one is there, almost as if conjured up by your thought.
Frezak: Yes.
Rhu: 1.0314425e+28 sheep is a lot of sheep.
The Gravedigger: Hey, kid;
If I throw you over the wall, can you see what's going on and come back and tell us?
Rhu: Oh, hello, sheep. I shall name you Thunder.
Amadi: Can who what? But I like it here!
Apheori (GM): Thunder thunders.
The Gravedigger: You can come back!
Rhu tries to coax Thunder to come over to me
Gaurav: him*
Apheori (GM): Thunder comes.
Amadi: No. You can never go back.
Why?
The Gravedigger: You can if you have a big rope.
Rhu tries to scratch Thunder's under the chin
Amadi: Why do you need me to go?
Apheori (GM): Thunder grows a chin accordingly.
Amadi: I can't go. Not far.
My time is here.
Rhu sighs, and sits down on the badly painted ground.
Amadi: The Key. Here.
The Gravedigger: To see what's... nevermind.
Where to, Radek?
Rhu: Wait a minute ...
Apheori (GM): Gravy, Greibel: d2s
20s
The Gravedigger: Wait for Rhu to pop up?
Rhu tries to think of a portal back to the rest of party
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20
(
11
)
=
11
Apheori (GM): Rhu: A portal forms.
Gaurav: Can I see the group through it?
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20
(
5
)
=
5
Apheori (GM): Greibel: Would you like to talk with the bees?
Bear Soup Guy: Sure...
Apheori (GM): Gaurav: It's opaque.
So no.
Greibel: You go and talk to the bees. They want Gravy to go through.
Rhu thinks of a stick. If one appears, he'll pick it up and poke the portal with it.
Radek: I haven't the slightest idea. These wizards seem to know a thing or two about the Holes - they were attempting to close this one, in fact - but you may have also noticed that they are also distressingly insane.
Amadi: ... I can see many things.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: A stick appears in your hand
Frezak (GM): Maybe we could access their research without dealing with the actual wizards.
Rhu pokes the portal with the stick, specifically testing to see if -- after having stuck the stick through the portal -- the entire stick comes back in one piece
Apheori (GM): The stick goes in and comes out.
Frezak (GM): ONLY BACKWARDS
Rhu sighs, then sticks his little finger through the portal and then out again. If that works, he'll do the same with his hand, and then his head.
Apheori (GM): It all works. The sheep watch this ridiculous display vacantly.
Gaurav: What does Rhu see through the portal?
Apheori (GM): Nothing in particular.
It doesn't seem to do anything with only parts stuck in it.
Rhu mutters something unprintable about wizards and then steps through
Apheori (GM): Hold that thought.
Gravy: You hear Dave's voice in your head. It sounds as though it's coming from very far away. I'm just going to stick it here because Amadi is totally listening in and I don't want to whisper it twice.
Dave: Gravedigger, hear me.
Ellemerr: Psychic eavesdropping for the win.
Frezak (GM): DELIGHTFUL.
My horns are brain-rods!
Dave: I need your help. I am not strong enough to do this on my own, and you are the only one who has the strength of will required.
I need you to come through the bees. They will let you pass, but only you. On the other side, I will do what I can to protect you. Just get to me, and we will fix this.
The Gravedigger: Uh.
Guys?
Dave: It will work. It must work.
The Gravedigger: I can hear Davenotdave in my head.
Amadi sighs very heavily... and starts attempting to scramble off Gravy's back and nearly falls off in the process.
Radek: Fantastic. Now say something sane just so I can be sure.
The Gravedigger: What, me?
I could talk to you about how to fold metal to make a really good shove, I suppose.
Radek: ...No, that's good enough already.
What does she want?
The Gravedigger: She... wants me to go through this door.
Apheori (GM): A portal opens up in front of Radek and Rhu walks out and runs into him.
Rhu: Oof.
Radek grumbles. Loudly.
Rhu turns around quickly to make sure the sheep don't follow him through
Radek: Do you make a habit of appearing out of nowhere, Rhu?
Apheori (GM): The portal is already gone. No sheep.
Rhu: hi! hi?
nowhere? what?
Radek: Perhaps you're learning more from Amadi than you realized.
I suggest you stop that.
The Gravedigger: That's a terrifying thought.
Amadi mutters with some amazement, "I can't get down."
Rhu: I dunno, I think I could learn something quite important from her. Probably about sandwiches or something.
Dave: Please.
Rhu: What did I miss?
Apheori (GM): Dave's voice is nothing more than a whisper now.
Amadi flails.
Rhu: Where's Dave?
Frezak (GM): I'll get Amadi down.
From this perch.
This really great perch;
Amadi mutters wistfully, "That was fun." Then she pushes at Gravy's back.
Amadi: Now go!
The Gravedigger: Uh.
I don't like the sound of any of this.
i'm a guy with a shovel.
That guy there has magic powers, that one talks to gods.
Rhu walks over to the road and looks up and down for Dave or guards.
Amadi: YOU are not afraid!
Now GO!
Amadi keeps pushing, probably making absolutely no progress.
The Gravedigger: I'm somewhat hesitant!
Rhu is now looking pretty concerned.
Rhu: You guys didn't leave Dave behind, did you? She's important!
Apheori (GM): Rhu: No Dave, some guards that are pointedly ignoring the lot of you.
Radek: Here.
The Gravedigger: Oh, well.
Radek offers Gravy a clockwork bomb.
The Gravedigger buckles on his shield, draws his best shovel.
The Gravedigger: It's Hole Time.
Frezak (GM): ONWARDS.
Amadi: Good. Go go go - wait!
... Can I have a shovel?
The Gravedigger: I'll make you one later.
Amadi: Okay!
Amadi beams.
(To Amadi): But you know there isnt going to be a later.
(From Amadi): Shush, you.
(To Amadi): Not unless...
Rhu is confused, but it looks like Gravy and Amadi have things something that might generously and with an awful lot of imagination be described as "under control"
(To Amadi): Well, you and Dave will have to work together to pretend to be yourselves.
Amadi: Take care of her for me. I'll take care of these.
Rhu waves confusedly at Gravy
Apheori (GM): Do you go through the gate? It's a writhing mass of bees.
Frezak (GM): I CHARGE.
Apheori (GM): The Gravedigger charges into the writhing mass of bees!
The cover him as he disappears into it.
Frezak (GM): GRAVYYYYY
POWERRRRRR
Apheori (GM): And I have to go to the bathroom. I'll be right back.
Frezak (GM): Suspense!
And bladders!
Amadi waves after him, and then collapses at the ground.
Rhu: (to Radek) I was in a painting with some sheep. It was surprisingly relaxing.
Ganelon: Uh... is Amadi okay?
I hate how often I need to ask that question.
Frezak (GM): Define 'okay' ?
Rhu: To be fair, the answer is usually "yes".
Ganelon: Well, she just collapsed.
Frezak (GM): SHe probably just has jelly legs.
Gaurav: But she didn't vanish. Or get blood on her hair. Or start flying. Honestly, there's many worse things that could happen.
Ellemerr: Well, I'm not going to tell you anything.
Gaurav: Radek should probably check on her, just to be sure.
Ganelon: Sure, when the DM returns.
Frezak (GM): OR THE MERR COULD TELL YOU
Ellemerr: Shan't~
You can't make me!
Gaurav: We have ways of making you talk.
Ellemerr: But you can totally roll things and I can tell you things.
Gaurav: Like, asking you questions.
Frezak (GM): I can totes make you.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+8 Heal
(
8
)
+8
=
16
Apheori (GM): Back, sorry.
Ganelon: There's a rolled thing.
Ellemerr: ... I'll leave it to the DM now.
Apheori (GM): She seems exhausted.
Like... something. Or something else.
Gaurav: Is she conscious?
(From Ellemerr): Can I even be unconscious and still present?
Gaurav: Also: I'll have to leave for class in another 55 mins or so.
(To Ellemerr): Yes, but I don't know why you ever would.
Ellemerr: I should sleep before that. >.>
Apheori (GM): I wish whispering weren't so annoying here.
Ellemerr: Am I conscious? I think I am but I'm not sure. xD
Frezak (GM): HOW CAN YOU NOT KNOW?
Rhu walks up behind Amadi "Don't get up", he says, "put your head between your knees and take deep breaths."
Bear Soup Guy: Kinky
(To Frezak): You come out on the other side of the gate of bees into a maelstrom of red, swirling about with colour showing through to a sheen of black.
(From Frezak (GM)): Oh.
(To Frezak): You can barely make out Dave sitting next to the mouseforged, which is now also sitting up.
(From Frezak (GM)): I'll go poke Dave.
Ellemerr: My automatic response for that is to take off her head and put it between her knees. I don't think that'd make anybody happy, though.
(To GM): rises and holds out a hand you as you make your way through the swirl. "Thank you", you think she says, but the words are immediately lost...
(To Frezak): Dave rises and holds out a hand you as you make your way through the swirl. "Thank you", you think she says, but the words are immediately lost...
Gaurav: Do it!
(From Frezak (GM)): So... You need something.... burying?
Apheori (GM): Oops.
Frezak (GM): BLOOOOOD
Amadi moves a little and sort of gets one knee up towards her head if not quite there. And she breathes. Probably. It sounds like breathing.
Rhu looks concerned, but defers to Radek as the senior healthsmith.
(To Frezak): We need to bury the space that isn't space. Make it... different.
(From Frezak (GM)): can I.... perceive two different kinds of space?
Ganelon: Well...
How attached is Rhu to his healing surges?
Rhu: I've got 7/8 left, so I can spare one for sure.
Gaurav: sorry ooc
Ellemerr: Amadi probably has surges of her own. That should never ever be used on other people. Probably.
Unless that'd be a great thing to do. It's pretty either-or.
Ganelon: When things get desperate, we can consider it.
Technically I could use your surges to heal you.
But I'll take one from Rhu and see if that doesn't make Amadi feel any better.
Gaurav: Does Rhu notice when you do this? Or is he just puzzled later when he has one fewer healing surge than he thought?
(To Frezak): Not really. Here, it mostly just seems wrong. Then Dave takes your hand and draws you to sit next to the mouseforged, forming a circle of three... and then you sense more. There is normality, in different layers and planes. There is the world. There are holes, in the world, and you are in the middle of one, but with Dave, you see the edges, feel the meaning of the hole. It is real, it is there, and it can be buried.
Ganelon: You'd have to be willing.
And aware, yes.
Gaurav: Ah, okay, yes. For sure. Hazz is very big on the keep-Amadi-alive bandwagon these days.
Ellemerr: Hmpfh.
Ganelon: Well, okay.
Sure, I could steal surges from people while they're sleeping (it would explain where I get the ones from extended rests), but generally speaking it's not something I can just *do* without it being noticed.
Apheori (GM): The surge thing should help Amadi.
Just throwing that out there.
Ganelon: People notice mosquitoes. This is a considerably larger scale affair.
(To Amadi): You're exhausted and you're paying attention to a thing in the courtyard where Dave, the mouseforged, and Gravy are sitting in a circle burying the hole. And you're probably helping, in some way
Ellemerr: Great! You should get her back on her feet just in time for her to fall asleep and poof out.
(To Amadi): And also possibly screaming at them, I dunno.
(From Ellemerr): Sounds delightful and delicious and a little scary and I'm lovin' it.
Gaurav: o.0
It's times like this Rhu wonders if he's backing the right god.
Ellemerr: Since I have to go sleep in,,, 10 mins.
(To Amadi): Poofing out right as the bees disperse would be great.
(From Frezak (GM)): I lift my shovel. Wedge it under an edge of the hole. AND HEAVE. I scoop up reality, cover the hole. I fill the hole with hole; I take all that is, all that is not, all the rest, and fill the hole. I BURY THAT SHIT DEEP.
Ellemerr: I may or may not be able to give you something valuable before that if we use the time right. :P
Gaurav: oooo
Frezak (GM): TYPE FAST
Ganelon: Radek just makes gestures of resignation, like throwing his hands in the air.
Frezak (GM): Presumably after putting his rifle down.
Ganelon: Yeah.
Ellemerr: I am healed, yes?
Ganelon: You are healed.
Amadi sits up, looking groggy.
Frezak (GM): IT'S A MIRACLE
No, no.
Sorry.
Just science.
And/or magic.
Ganelon: Thank you.
(To Frezak): Dave and the mouseforged are with you, mirroring the motions as you bury the hole. It is smooth, the simplest and yet most elegant hole you have ever dug and buried...
Amadi: Waffles?
(To Frezak): And the maelstrom fades as well, the wrong space folding up and sliding into its grave with each scoop of the shovel.
Rhu: There might be some in that pub on the corner.
So: Dave and Gravy are in there with the Hole?
... may I ask why?
Frezak (GM): SHITS AND GIGGLES.
Amadi: We're - they're... anti-digging.
Radek: ...Must be dreadful.
Amadi: Or... something.
Rhu: Huh.
Gaurav: Can I make an acrobatics check to climb the wall?
Ganelon: T'would be Athletics to climb.
Gaurav: D'oh
Ganelon: There's a feat which makes it Acro.
Gaurav: Oooh, I'll look out for that one.
Amadi: It's very important. They're being much more useful than Fred.
... Bloody excuses.
Rhu: Who's Fred?
Amadi: A face to the name? There's never a face to the name!
Rhu opens his mouth to reply, can't think of anything to say, and closes his mouth again. Then he walks over to the door and tries to hear things from the other side.
(From Frezak (GM)): Gravy will hum digging songs.
Amadi sighs.
(To Amadi): You may disappear.
Amadi: He called me "love". I'll forget in... very soon.
Amadi mutters so low only Gravy could've heard it, "And I'm still scared."
Rhu: (over his shoulder) And by "he" you mean ... Fred?
I knew a Fred Nurke once. Strange guy. Smoked gorillas.
Amadi seems to ignore the question, but looks straight at Rhu.
Greibel: What an odd name for a brand of cigarettes
Amadi: Very, VERY soon.
Amadi closes her eyes for a moment and is gone.
Rhu: Gribel: indeed. They used to be called Camels, but I guess they wanted to catchier name.
Greibel: I guess it's easier to imagine a gorilla smoking than a camel
Rhu: Huh. I never thought about it that way before!
I don't suppose it'd be worth it to send Greibel as a flock of birds over the wall to see what's going on? Probably just more damage for everybody I guess.
Greibel: I'm sure it's...fine. Just fine.
Frezak (GM): Nighty-night, Merr.
Ellemerr: Sweet nightmares, y'all.
Rhu: Good night, Ellemerr!
Gaurav: ooc
Bear Soup Guy: adios
Ellemerr: Good luck with things.
(To Frezak): The digging continues as irreality neatly folds itself into its grave. There is only a little bit left before it will finish, but before it can complete, one of the shapes falls away and you are left alone. No, not quite alone - Dave is still there with you, holding onto the shovel, onto you. "No!" she says. "Not now! He can't..."
(To Frezak): But it isn't enough. Now you, too, are falling away, away from the shell of the mouseforged, away from Dave.
(To Frezak): Then there is another voice - like Dave's, but this time it is Amadi - the Amadi who had been with you in your dreams, who had always been there even when you had never known it at the time. "No," she says, much more calmly than Dave, and you feel her lifting you out of the hole, away from the madness of the broken reality as its grave closes over. "You will not fall like this. I will not allow it."
Gaurav: thanks!
Ellemerr: And ask Hazz about Fred. Because I can imagine amusing answers and I like amusement.
Gaurav: o.0
(From Frezak (GM)): Okay, that's pretty cool.
Gaurav: No way, if there's one thing Rhu is NOT going to do, it's discuss Amadi's private life with a god.
(To Frezak): And everything fades away.
Ganelon: But she's important!
It's not so bad if you're inquiring about a celebrity.
Gaurav: hmm. true. but if there's anything to tell, Amadi can tell us that in her own time.
of course, if she were to go missing or something, it might be useful to try to get more out of Hazz on that front
Apheori (GM): Everyone: Shortly after Amadi disappears, the gate of bees opens.
Gaurav: well, more missing than usual
Rhu: Hey! Door's open. (peers inside, avoiding the bees if he can)
Ellemerr: How would you KNOW if Amadi was more missing than usual? xD
Apheori (GM): The courtyard is a bit ruined - it seems the gardener will have his work cut out for him - but everything is calm. Dave is sitting on a bunch of furrowed ground, arm out, staring in shock at the space in front of her. The mouseforged is in a heap behind her.
Gaurav: If she starting missing entire sessions, f'rinstance. Despite her random appearances and disappearances, I think we'd notice that pretty soon!
but I might be grossly over exaggerating our ability to notice obvious things there
(To Ellemerr): You just pulled Gravy into the... well, whatever the Dreamer's realm is called.
(From Ellemerr): I'm awesome.
(To Ellemerr): Quite.
Bear Soup Guy: We're great at noticing innocuous little details though!
Gaurav: BSG++
F'rinstance, does Amadi still have Dave's mask?
Ellemerr: But she's designed to allow me to be gone for entire sessions! That's the point! (Although admittedly, our fine DM has a tendency to still pop her in with lazer-pointers or stuff.)
She does.
... Probably.
Frezak (GM): Nah, BSG. Gravy's perception makes up for my obliviousness.
Gaurav: I should leave in ~10 mins btw
Apheori (GM): Let's call it a session, then.
Ganelon: Are we ending on a cliffhanger?
Apheori (GM) grins/
Gaurav: Dum dum DUM
Apheori (GM): .
Bear Soup Guy: =D
Ganelon: Blasted cliffhangers.
Frezak (GM): Blasted cliffhangers:
Gaurav: don't have a wait a whole week for the (partial) solution, though. only Sunday!
what time Sunday?
or Saturday
Frezak (GM): SUNDAYS.
I'm bought on saturdays >.>
Bear Soup Guy: SUNDAY SUNDAY SUNDAY
Apheori (GM): What time? Who all will be there? When are we losing Frezak?
Are we losing anyone else?
Did I mix that up?
Frezak (GM): You don't lose me until you change days.
Apheori (GM): That would be... after today.
Bear Soup Guy: I'll be there and I suggest regular time
Gaurav: I'd prefer morning MT (about 2-3 hours earlier than usual), but I can do regular if necessary
Frezak (GM): I probably can't do regular time on Sunday.
Gaurav: well, late morning MT
Ellemerr: I will not be available this sunday. I don't know yet about next one. After that I should be back.
Gaurav: Frezak: what time on Sundays works for you?
Frezak (GM): Uh.
Way earlier than this >.>
Gaurav: I can do that.
If it gets very early, I can just go back to sleep afterwards :)
Frezak (GM): Like... 10-18 GMT (ish) >.>
Ellemerr: What, you're going to DM and play at the same time? O_o
Frezak (GM): Well, I can't play later.
Ellemerr: You're insane.
Frezak (GM): It's that or nothing.
And I have done it before.
Gaurav: http://www.timeanddate.com/worldclock/meetingtime.html?iso=20140413&p1=1243&p2=224
Apheori (GM): 13 is the earliest I can get up.
13:00 UTC
Gaurav: I can do 1300 UTC also. BSG? That's 6am for you.
Bear Soup Guy: yeeeahhh...
Is 14:00 okay?
Apheori (GM): Should be.
Ganelon: To be sure... this is earlier than the normal start time for the Other Other Game, right?
Er, is not.
Gaurav: I'm fine with 1400 UTC also
Frezak (GM): We usually start the Other Other Game at about 12 my time. Which is.... uh.... 10-11 GMT/UTC?
I DONT KNOW TIMES.
Gaurav: Name a city that's in your time zone
Bear Soup Guy: http://www.timezoneconverter.com/cgi-bin/tzc.tzc
Frezak (GM): Paris!
Ellemerr: We're mid-Europe, both Frezak and I.
Frezak (GM): Madrid!
MERR
DO THE TIME THIN
Gaurav: http://www.timeanddate.com/worldclock/meetingtime.html?month=4&day=13&year=2014&p1=1243&p2=224&p3=187&p4=195&iv=0
Frezak (GM) pushes Merr at times.
Gaurav: I keep forgetting where Gan is, sorry >.<
Ellemerr: MIDNIGHT
Ganelon: Canada.
Frezak (GM): Cyborgia.
Ganelon: It doesn't particularly matter because I can wake up when I like.
Ellemerr: He is very cyborgy on this point. Sometimes I wonder if he even sleeps, but then I wake up early and he can't play GW with me.
Ganelon: But I need a time, and it would be nice if it weren't 3AM if you expect me to stay for 12 hours.
Apheori (GM): Should be 10:00 your time.
Or maybe 9.
Eastern?
Ganelon: EST, yes.
Ellemerr: I'm done with my night-preparations and all that is left is settling my head on my pillow. So I will really go now. Frezak should know as much as me about my schedule. Good luck again.
Bear Soup Guy: Adios merr
Apheori (GM): 14-18 UTC sunday, then.
Frezak (GM): Uh.
What is 18 UTC for me?
Looooking >.>
Apheori (GM): Which translates to I have no idea because of DST for Frezak and Ellemerr, 10am for Gan, 8am for me, and 7am for Rob?
Bear Soup Guy: 8 pm
Ganelon: 10 should be easy.
Frezak (GM): I can't do more than... 17 UTC.
Bear Soup Guy: 14-17 is still a substantial session
Gaurav: 1800 UTC is 8pm in Paris
Apheori (GM): Aiight.
Frezak (GM): Yeah, 17 is as far as i can go.
Gaurav: Sounds good to me. See all you lovely people at 8am MT (1400 UTC) on Sunday! Byeeeeeeeee
Bear Soup Guy: Right-o, bye Gaur!
Frezak (GM): HAVE FUN, RAVE.
Apheori (GM): Eeeek seeyou.
Frezak (GM): And BSG whenever he slouches off.
Bear Soup Guy slouches
Bear Soup Guy: Adios all, till sunday

Session 19

Ganelon: Well, here I am.
Apheori (GM): I feel like I'm forgetting something.
Or someone.
Ganelon: Ellemerr? She may not show up at all.
Apheori (GM): Aye, she's... immaterial to this conversation.
Or something.
But anyway, the situation is simple enough. A meat monster exploded all over the place and holes started opening and you had to evacuate, leaving Dave and the mouseforged behind. Rhu popped into and out of some portal he opened in a fit of insanity and has no idea what's going on, but nobody seems to have noticed. Then Dave called Gravy inside, leaving the rest of you on the street outside...
And now the door of bees is once more open.
Beyond you may or may not be able to see a ruined vaguely meaty courtyard, Dave sitting on the ground with the mouseforged toppled beside her, and Gravy nowhere to be found.
Gaurav: ew, meaty courtyard
Rhu mutters to himself: "So Dave and that priest have some kind of history, and now Mrs. Teatime and this Fred person have some kind of history ..."
Gaurav: Should we go in and investigate?
I have an alternate plan, we could all go to the pub and get some waffles.
Ganelon: I was *just* about to suggest that.
Except Radek doesn't eat.
So he's going in.
Rhu follows Radek, a little nervous now that Gravy's hulking presence isn't at the head of the group.
Ganelon: Well, he's going in so long as it seems safe.
If things still feel hole-y, he'd stay back.
Apheori (GM): No sign of holes.
Dave is sitting there looking shocked.
Radek: What happened here?
Rhu stays away from the heart of the meaty explosion, and looks around for other people, especially wizard-y types.
Dave: I've lost him. That wasn't it. I thought that was it, but it wasn't.
Apheori (GM): The scruffy-looking wizard is watching from a doorway.
Perception, or something.
Rhu ignores Dave for the time being, as long as she looks visibly undamaged
Rhu: Hey, Gravy, you should --- oh. Never mind.
rolling 1d20+12 perception check
(
19
)
+12
=
31
Rhu wanders up to the scruffy wizard
Rhu: Hey.
Scruffy-looking wizard: Did you need something?
Rhu: Did you see our friend? Tall guy. Broad. Horns. He came back in here a few minutes ago.
Gaurav: Did Greibel come in after us?
Bear Soup Guy: Surely
Scruffy-looking wizard: Do you see your friend?
No, no, no.
That's not right.
None of this is right.
Rhu sighs.
Rhu: So little is these days.
Scruffy-looking wizard: Instabilities of this scope do not simply balance themselves. There has to be a counter reagent.
Rhu: Still, no giant fish. That's a bonus.
A counter ... what?
Scruffy-looking wizard: Can you approximate his mass?
Rhu looks confused
Rhu: I went to mass once. I was bored but there were biscuits.
Ganelon: I'd going to guess "yes".
But I'll ask
Apheori (GM): GREIBEL.
Gaurav: Maybe he is One with the Bees now.
Bear Soup Guy: HUHRN?
Gaurav: 7am sounds! :p
Scruffy-looking wizard gives Rhu a look like he's some kind of inanimate object.
Greibel intones a guess at Gravy's weight while glancing sideways at Rhu
Rhu is even more confused now, and looks around for somebody else to talk to.
Ganelon: I'll pull it up, here.
Scruffy-looking wizard: Hmm...
Gaurav: So I guess that 31 perception check didn't perceive whatever was there to perceive?
Ganelon: Maybe there was nothing.
Scruffy-looking wizard stalks over to the mouseforged and starts poking it and asking Dave a slew of seemingly very random questions.
Ganelon: It's "perception", not "creation", after all.
Dave sort of answers some of them, especially the ones about sheep.
Apheori (GM): Oh, I missed that completely.
I blame this terrible interface.
And being half asleep.
Gaurav: I blame maths.
But then I usually do.
Apheori (GM): You perceive... nothing notable, since I forgot why I made you roll that.
Rhu looks around for anybody else, particularly the gardener, who made some sort of sense at some point. If there's nobody around, he's going to go knock on the door of the building the monster came out of earlier.
Apheori (GM): The door it came out of is off its hinges.
Ganelon: So, I take it these questions between Dave and the scruffster are fairly inane?
Apheori (GM): Aye.
But Dave is starting to look less freaked out and more just confused as a result of them.
And a wee bit frustrated.
To Radek, they sound like the guy is insane.
Rhu pokes his head through the open doorway and says in a normal voice, "Hello?"
Radek: None of that matters!
Dave. What did you do?
Dave: I don't...
We closed the hole?
Gravy!
Where's Gravy?
I lost Gravy! Gods, I lost him, how could I lose him?!
Radek: Lost him /where/?
Rhu calls loudly through the open doorway, "HELLO? ANYBODY THERE?"
Dave: In... the hole?
No, wait, she was there.
She took him.
Pulled him out. Out.
Dave gestures vaguely.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: What's your reflex?
Gaurav: Rhu has 14 Reflex Defense, but he's trained in acrobatics if that matters
Apheori (GM): I don't know, does it? Because someone inside throws a fireball at him.
Ganelon: Acro doesn't help against that.
Also, holy shit.
Apheori (GM): The fireball misses.
Rhu ducks behind the remains of the door.
Rhu: ... huh.
[loudly] I Was Wondering If Any Of You Saw Our Friend Who Came Back In Here A Minute Ago.
Voice from inside the building: Go away!
Rhu considers saying something rude, pauses, then mutters something under his breath before walking back to Dave and Radek.
Rhu: [to Greibel] College people are the worst.
Greibel: Finals can be stressful.
Rhu: Fireball-in-your-face stressful
?
Greibel: I like to think so
It makes me feel better about never attending
Radek mutters to himself. "Out..."
Rhu: Just think! You could be chasing exploding monsters around a college somewhere. What larks.
Radek: So you closed it. How?
Dave: The...
Gravy...
Shovel?
Apheori (GM): If any of you have insight, you might suspect that it's actually just Rhu that was bothering them. His voice is very grating.
And loud.
And unhelpful.
But Radek is probably just used to that, so it's all on Greibel to not notice.
Apheori (GM) eyeballs Greibel from beyond the beyond.
Bear Soup Guy: INSIGHT
Radek: ...
Gaurav: Hey! Rhu's voice is melliferous. Apart from the smoking. And the hating academicals. And the recent Hole-related panic.
So, eh, no, you're right. Never mind.
Bear Soup Guy: 20 passive insight
Apheori (GM): Then you probably notice how annoying it might have been to them. Whether or not you notice you notice is up to you.
Dave: I'm sorry. I don't know.
Radek: Am I the only one in this entire world who knows /what/ he is doing when he does it!?
Dave: Everything is... swimming. I see things and they're there and they're not and I see them as they change, and I don't know what they are, and I thought it was the mushrooms, but they were always there and I just segfaulted when I tried to see them, that's all.
Array access out of bounds. Runaway process. Metaphor that doesn't fit the situation.
Who am I?
Rhu: [to Dave] How are you feeling now?
Scruffy-looking wizard: Oh, lots of people know, they just don
't care.
What kind of soul did you use this thing?
Dave: Stoned.
Ganelon: He means the Mouseforged?
Apheori (GM): Aye.
Gaurav: Is the courtyard surrounded by buildings?
Radek: It belonged to a recently dead mouse. You may observe that, for an unrelated experiment, it has not caused even the slightest dimensional instability.
Apheori (GM): Some, but there's only one important-looking building.
Gaurav: But that one has fireballs in it.
Scruffy-looking wizard: Transpositional approximation, is it? Very interesting.
Apheori (GM): Apparently.
Rhu starts walking from building to building, knocking on the door and shouting "Hello? I'm looking for a friend? Did you see a universe-twisting explosion in this courtyard a few minutes ago?"
Radek: What, you want to talk sense /now/?
Ganelon: Oh, here's a thought.
Don't we all have radios?
Scruffy-looking wizard: It all makes sense. There's just the minor inconvenience of the sheep.
Gaurav: I can't remember if they've worked since we got here.
Rhu: ... did you say sheep?
Scruffy-looking wizard mutters something about crossed juxtapositioning.
Apheori (GM): You do have radios.
Rhu: ... 'cos I teleported into a painting and there were sheep in it also.
One of them was black.
I named him Thunder.
Apheori (GM): The wizard ignores Rhu. Two more wizards step out of portals and join him poking the mouseforged.
Rhu sighs, and returns to knocking on doors.
Ganelon: I'm sure this will be futile, but it's the effort that counts.
I'll see if I can't contact Gravy in his mystical plane of "Out".
Apheori (GM): Say something into it.
Gaurav: Do you think this "Out" is the same "Out" that we saw on the transporter?
Apheori (GM): It indicates it can connect.
Radek: Gravedigger, are you there? If you are capable of responding, there is a high probability that you are still alive.
Gaurav: Ha!
Apheori (GM): From the radio comes a voice that sounds suspiciously like the sphinx.
It says, "Hungry."
Radek scowls intensely at his radio.
Apheori (GM): Then there's a bunch of fumbling noises and someone else is saying, "Hello? Who is this? Are you a friend?"
Ganelon: Nobody I recognize?
Apheori (GM): It sounds a bit like Amadi.
Rhu walks over to Radek and listens in.
Radek: That would depend on your relation to the man who owned this radio.
Ganelon: Unless you want to get technical, in which case nobody is really Radek's friend.
Because he's a huge grouch.
Radio: Of his. The soranai with the shovels.
Radek: Yes. Why are you speaking instead of him?
Radio: He's... occupied. Slightly stuck. Not dead, but dreaming. But not dreaming, either. He needs a way out.
Apheori (GM): You hear some mumbling and muffle sounds of a squabble.
Radio: Can you dig? He's lost himself, but if you dig him out for him that might work too.
Agh, you... get off, will you?
Apheori (GM): ...and some more strange noises.
Rhu: [to radio, but maybe he's too far away for them to hear] Where are you?
Apheori (GM): You both have your own radios, but you can both use them.
Is this what you do?
Ganelon: Well, it would be my next question.
He's welcome to ask it instead, though.
Gaurav: Naah, I just shout at it over Radek's shoulder.
Apheori (GM): Man, you're noisy.
Ganelon: I wish I could throw fireballs at him.
My magic isn't quite as flashy.
Radio: Where? Um...
Woods, I suppose.
Nice place for a picnic, if you're into those sorts of dreams.
Gaurav: Gan: if you give Rhu a dirty look or something, he'll stop.
Rhu: Are there any sheep?
Ganelon: What, you mean more than usual?
Yeah, you get a dirty look for shouting in Radek's ear.
Rhu backs away apologetically.
Radio: Certainly.
Rhu: [to Radek] Ask them if there's a black sheep named Thunder.
Radek sighs.
Radek: Are any of them black?
Radio: Oh, I'm sure. You could probably find whatever colour you like if you look far enough.
Your noisy friend likes sheep, does he?
Rhu: They might be in the same place as I teleported to, then. It was a painting with sheep in it. Any think you thought of immediately appears.
I got out by thinking up a portal back to you guys.
Radek: ...And you didn't think to try and take anything with you?
Rhu nods
Rhu: But I was pretty sure you guys would kill me if I brought any more pets to this party.
Radek: No money, powerful weapons, an impossible device that could solve all of our problems instantly and without consequences? Nothing?
Rhu: ...
yeah, I forgot about that stuff. Sorry.
Ganelon: Radek's scowl advances to the next tier.
Rhu: I wish I'd remembered to dream myself a sandwich though. Is anybody else hungry?
Radek: Unbelievable.
Gaurav: Rhu sort of ignores all of Radek's scowls now. He's only really concerned about who the scowl is pointing at.
Ganelon: You had the power to create anything!
Rhu withers under the heat of Radek's scowl, then suddenly remembers something he has to do way over on the other side of the courtyard there, mutters an excuse and leaves.
Greibel shakes his head in pity
Greibel: Never seen a guy stay the same after coming out of a painting
Dave: How many have you seen going in?
Greibel: Well, after today....one
Dave: That's... hmm.
Dave wiggles her fingers.
Radek: So, you closed a rift.
Could you do it again?
Dave: Yes.
Ganelon: Attention's off the radio, now.
Dave: I mean... I don't know.
Yes.
Apheori (GM): How's Radek's insight?
Ganelon: 3.
It would probably be lower if wisdom wasn't important to him.
Gaurav: o.0
Apheori (GM): Greibel: Dave is hiding something.
Roll to... uh...
See if you can tell something.
Ganelon: Radek has insights into things by the definition of the word.
But as far as the D&D skill is concerned, nah.
Too much of it involves reading people, and he often doesn't care what people are thinking.
Greibel:
rolling 1d20+10 stuff!
(
9
)
+10
=
19
Gaurav: Yeah, mine is only 5. I just thought he was more insightful than Rhu, who is pretty clueless at the best of times.
Apheori (GM): In the general sense, Radek probably is much more insightful.
Ganelon: But Rhu would definitely read into how people act more.
And that's what the skill is about in 4E.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: Dave is still really stoned, but also worried enough that it's getting through the stonedness.
She may have figured something out.
Gaurav: Makes sense.
Radek: Well, at least something good came out of this mess.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: It may or may not involve mushrooms, and it makes you nervous.
Greibel: Not-Dave, you know something, don't you?
Dave: I don't know.
Dave looks at Greibel imploringly.
Gaurav: It's all up to you now, Greibel.
Bear Soup Guy: THE PRESSURE
Gaurav: Pressure makes diamonds. But it also causes decompression sickness. All the best!
Bear Soup Guy: Excellent
Greibel:
rolling 1d20+1 diplomacy to try to weasel something out of Dave
(
9
)
+1
=
10
Dave gives Greibel a shiny stone.
Gaurav: Yay?
Greibel: Score
What's this?
Ganelon: It appears to be a shiny stone.
Dave: Shiny. They were on the ground with her.
Rhu: I've got one of those.
Greibel:
rolling 1d20+12 stone nature
(
6
)
+12
=
18
Rhu: From the beach on the other side of the Hole i went through. Someone who looked like Amadi gav it to me.
Rhu shows everybody a shiny stone with a symbol of a tree growing on it.
Rhu: i don't remember any woods or picnic spots though
Apheori (GM): This one has a dragon.
Greibel: Goodie! I've always loved collections.
I wonder how many there are.
Dave: Eleven.
Apheori (GM): Frazak!
You're in a place that is not where the others are.
Bear Soup Guy: Oh hi Frezak
Greibel stares at the stones
Greibel: That's gonna take some work.
Radek: Are they important?
Frezak (GM): I'm a little late and I'd apologise if it was my fault >.>
Well, lots late.
reading backlog.
Apheori (GM): It's okay. Since your guy is somewhere else we just went without you.
Say when you're ready and we can do your thingy, if there's time.
Frezak (GM): I'm still in the Far Realm?
Gorramit, guys.
Way to save me.
Apheori (GM): What's a far realm?
Ganelon: Do not answer that, Frezak.
Frezak (GM): It's- awwww.
Ganelon: It is not a fun place.
Anyways, Gravy is within radio range of us.
Frezak (GM): Oh, awesome.
Ganelon: Or maybe magic is involved there.
Apheori (GM): Or his radio is.
Frezak (GM): Possibly.
Apheori (GM): Wikipedia says the Far Realm is a mix of horror, madness, and Lovecraftian geometries.
Ganelon: Well, yeah. Basically, we got an answer from probably-Amadi.
Apheori (GM): Intriguing.
Frezak (GM): I'm a Far Realm expert.
Apheori (GM): You would be.
Frezak (GM): Totes.
I wonder what teh perception DC to see across planes is.
Apheori (GM): A mushroom.
Frezak (GM): Also, hello BSG.
Is Rave here?
I don't see his colournameboxthing.
Apheori (GM): I don't either, but he's been talking regardless.
Frezak (GM): Mysssstical.
Gaurav: I have died and become a ghost. I exist solely in this game now.
Frezak (GM): My condolences.
That sounds pretty shitty.
No offense, Names.
Apheori (GM): I am offended.
Frezak (GM): Tough.
I'll stop interrupting, now.
Rhu: So: we have two shiny stones now. Out of eleven?
Ganelon: For convenience's sake, I'll repeat Radek's last question: are they important?
Dave: Yes.
Gaurav: oh, right, sorry
Apheori (GM): Total you should have five between you, but I don't know who has what or if Rhu would know about the others.
Ganelon: Five? I remember two from... messages we got.
Gaurav: These are the only two shiny stones I have in my campaign log. We got two rocks with messages.
Apheori (GM): There were two from that lady who showed up when you entered the city, Rhu got one in a weird place, and I dunno about the other.
Gaurav: If anybody interested, here's what's carved on them: a stylised mask, some sort of bird, tree, dragon.
This is reminding me of the tree over the Hole where we lost Azir and dunked a zombie into a pool.
Ganelon: It became a zombomb, yes.
Gaurav: So: should we try rescuing Frezak ourselves, or try to convince these turbulent wizards to help?
well, "help"
Ganelon: Who has them, though?
Apheori (GM): Oh, there were only four.
Ganelon: I'd guess "not me", because they're rocks.
Chronologically I'd much prefer if he did his whole thing first.
Gaurav: I have both the ones that were handed to me. I think the first rock/message was handed to Greibel, so he should have that one, plus the one Dave gave him just now.
Bear Soup Guy: Yay collectibles
Gaurav: Gotta find 'em all.
I'm okay with chronologically if that's easier on everybody.
Bear Soup Guy: Maybe they have mystical elemental powers that can turn us into themed bio-mechs
Frezak (GM): Maybe if I was a giant robot I could actually lift something.
Apheori (GM): Do you want to be a giant robot?
I'm sure Radek could put your soul in the mouseforged body.
You could be with your mousie forever and ever and ever.
Ganelon: That's just a regular sized robot, though.
Also, creepy.
Apheori (GM): It would be a start.
Frezak (GM): Just a little too creepy.
Gaurav: To be fair, this game has a very high creepiness threshold.
Apheori (GM): Yay, creepy!
I mean...
What were we all doing?
And when were we ending?
Bear Soup Guy: We're deciding what to do about Gravy
I think
Gaurav: we were conspiring to kill all the wizards, or at least kick them out of this college
Frezak (GM): I can probably go on for an hour or so.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Okay, so you all just got another rock to go with others, which you don't know who holds. You may or may not be sorting that out.
Several more wizards come out and join the others poking the mouseforged.
One exchanges incoherencies with Dave and Radek.
Ganelon: I should probably make sure the Mouseforged is okay.
Rhu glares occasionally at the wizards but avoids Radek's eye. Mostly he's just looking over the dragon stone he has and thinking.
Apheori (GM): Frezak: You are in a clearing in an old forest, with towering branches reaching overhead, almost closing over the clearing.
Frezak: Standing stones line the edge of the clearing, forming a broken circle.
Gan: You push through the wizards, and behold... a mouseforged that looks pretty much exactly as it did before.
Roll or something to sort out more.
And I need a bathroom.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+11
(
20
)
+11
=
31
Oh cool.
I mostly just want to know why it's not been moving around.
Gaurav: You glimpse the soul of every mouse forged in the universe.
Ganelon: That doesn't sound too tough.
Frezak (GM): I'll go examine the stones without stepping into teh circle or touching the stones.
Apheori (GM): You started in the middle of the circle, so does that mean not stepping out in this case?
Also is there any good way to run two concurrent parts of the same story without confusing everyone?
Frezak (GM): Oh, right.
Yeah.
Sure, whispers.
Apheori (GM): Whispers are annoying, though.
But okay.
Perhaps we should do that, then.
Bear Soup Guy: We've managed it a couple times so far
Gaurav: Right. Rhu's encounter through the Hole has never been entered into the main story logs, but nobody's complained so far.
Apheori (GM): Gan: Its... uh... power is depleted and something is broken with some of the connections. It looks like someone jerryrigged them and it fell apart again.
(This is new.)
(It wasn't like this when you were working on it before.)
(To Frezak): The stones are old and mossy, with smoothed edges. They look like they might have been carved, but there aren't any patterns carved in them.
(To Frezak): "They're just stones," Amadi says behind you, but when you look, it isn't Amadi. This one is too pale, too white.
(From Frezak (GM)): How deep into the earth are the stones?
Rhu loiters near the wizards and tries to overhear what they're talking about
(From The Gravedigger): A stone is a stone is a stone is a stone.
(To Frezak): Deep enough that you can't tell without digging them up.
Greibel continues inspecting the stones
Rhu: [to Greibel] What do you suppose they're made of?
Apheori (GM): Whispers are primarily annoying in that the chat interface kind of sucks for them.
It's like... no, it's WORSE than irssi.
Frezak (GM): If you're that irritated, use skype?
Apheori (GM): Greibel: It resembles shale. You can use your nature to... I dunno.
Skype is worse than irssi too.
Greibel:
rolling 1d20+12 nature to... I dunno
(
4
)
+12
=
16
Apheori (GM): Apparently it isn't shale and I don't know what I'm talking about. But you don't know either. HAH!
Greibel: (To Rhu) Certainly some kind of sedimentary rock
Bear Soup Guy: That'll show me!
Rhu nods, although he has no idea what that means.
Ganelon: Well, I push any wizards who happen to be within reach of the Mouseforged away.
And try to fix the poor thing.
(To Frezak): Stones know what they are.
(From The Gravedigger): Doesn't mean I do. What time is it?
(To Frezak): Almost midnight.
(To Frezak): But it's always almost midnight here.
(From Frezak (GM)): What is the sky like?
(To Frezak): Sky looks like daytime. Probably afternoon.
Apheori (GM): The wizards grumble and rearrange themselves and try to help.
Roll arcana.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+11
(
9
)
+11
=
20
I'm not accepting help from crazy wizards who probably caused the problem in the first place.
Apheori (GM): You manage to reconnect the broken bits and wind up with a wizard's beard glued to your own.
They aren't taking hints.
This wizard hasn't even noticed yet.
Ganelon: Glued? Not just tangled?
(From The Gravedigger): Am I in the hole?
(To Frezak): No, not quite.
(To Frezak): You've lost yourself, Gravedigger. Or perhaps I should say she's lost you, but you are here, and here, if nothing else, you are safe.
Apheori (GM): Glued.
(From The Gravedigger): How did you break?
Ganelon: Do I have anything sharp?
Because I'm totally merciless enough to cut his beard off.
Frezak (GM): Can't you conjure fire?
(To Frezak): Gods are cruel. They do not take kindly to what they do not understand. Someone had to take the fall.
Apheori (GM): You should have a knife in your kit thing.
Ganelon: I cannot conjure fire.
(To Frezak): But you're not asking about that, are you?
Ganelon: Also, fire spreads.
(From The Gravedigger): I might be. I don't know anything. What's out there?
Ganelon: Alright. Should I roll for this, to not be noticed?
And if so, stealth or thievery?
(From Frezak (GM)): He'll gesture outside the circle.
(To Frezak): Woods, I suppose. Dreams. It doesn't matter.
(To Frezak): Find yourself. It is all here.
Apheori (GM): I suppose you probably should.
Since while he's incredibly unlikely to notice, we still don't know what will happen as is.
He's arguing with another wizard about the mouseforged's feet.
Ganelon: Well, pick a skill. I have training in thievery but not stealth.
Apheori (GM): Thievery.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+6
(
7
)
+6
=
13
Apheori (GM): You're thieving a piece of beard.
Ganelon: That I am.
Apheori (GM): You thieve a piece of beard.
Gaurav: Smooth.
Bear Soup Guy: Achievement unlocked
Radek: Are you "wizards" good for anything at all? Give me some power, here. That's why the damn thing isn't moving.
Apheori (GM): One of them helpfully sets another on fire and he runs away yelling about pancakes.
Another more helpfully offers some sort of power crystal.
Ganelon: Fantastic.
I don't think Warforged strictly have a power source beyond simply "magic".
Unless they're powered by the soul, which seems unlikely given how the soul is used to govern their actions.
Apheori (GM): Magic is a source.
Ganelon: But hey, if it's low on magic, well... I've got some magic here.
Have some magic, Mouseforged.
In crystalline form.
Apheori (GM): Roll to restore the energy magic stuff of the mouseforged.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+11
(
15
)
+11
=
26
(From The Gravedigger): Myself? That's... hard. I'm... wherever a corpse needs to be buried, wherever someone forgets the old ways, wherever a hole is dug, wherever a hole is filled. I could have been a god, you know. But I never liked the idea of worship. Sounded hard. Or was that me? Maybe I'm just a dreaming kid, eyes full of strength and stone.
Ganelon: I'm good at two things: Being grumpy, and magic.
(From The Gravedigger): Sometimes, it's not easy to remember.
Ganelon: Well, three things. We can add safari hunting to that list.
Frezak (GM): Roll to grump?
Apheori (GM): Your magic succeeds and the mouseforged curls up and tries to hide under you.
Needless to say it fails.
Frezak (GM): Instill some Wis into the mousie.
Gaurav: One of these days we're going to get an ally who won't trip us up.
A Wisinjection?
Ganelon: I don't have the wisdom to spare.
Radek: There! Back up and moving.
(To Frezak): The not Amadi nods, and says, "Where words fail, your eyes will tell you true." The clearing falls away, and you hear her say, "This is who you are, soranai of the shovels.
Radek: Now please admire my work without interfering with it in the future.
Rhu comes over to see
Rhu: I wonder if he saw anything.
(To Frezak): You are now somewhere else. It is like a house of mirrors, shards of them everywhere, reflecting back at you, showing yourself, showing other things. None of the backgrounds are quite what you would expect, however - they don't show your surroundings, but other ones, as though they are something in the mirrors themselves.
Dave: Nice.
Radek: Let's find out. Greibel, get over here.
(From Frezak (GM)): I'll hold out my hand and examine it.
(To Frezak): Do you touch it?
Greibel saunters over non-chalantly
(From Frezak (GM)): What, my hand? I'm examining my extremity.
(From Frezak (GM)): Checking that it's still... mine.
(To Frezak): Ah, right. Your hand looks like your hand. But it's glowing slightly for some reason, and almost seems like it could be partially transparent.
Greibel:
rolling 1d20+12 try to talk with the mouseforged
(
13
)
+12
=
25
Apheori (GM): You talk to it. Go.
(From Frezak (GM)): I'll turn around and look for an Amadipiece.
(To Frezak): No amadi pieces, just more mirrors.
(From Frezak (GM)): Are there any mirrors with a... blank or reflective background?
Bear Soup Guy: Oh, right-o
(To Frezak): Some, further away. Or maybe you're just not close enough.
Greibel: Hello? Are you alright in there?
(From Frezak (GM)): can I move, or am I stuck in on spot with mirrors all around?
Apheori (GM): The mouseforged makes happy mousie noises at Greibel.
(To Frezak): You can move. It's a forest of mirrors and you are in the middle of it, but you can go find a new middle.
Greibel: Good. Good. Tell me what you've seen around here?
Apheori (GM): It doesn't seem to understand the concept of here, but it recalls a story of sorts of a whole lot of darkness, and some sort of storm that would have terrified it utterly had it not had its friend helping it dig.
Gaurav: HUH.
(From Frezak (GM)): what kind of 'other things' do these mirrorshards show?
Bear Soup Guy: Diggy diggy hole
Frezak (GM): Gods damn you, BSG.
Greibel: He's seen Gravy. Can't get much out of him though. There's not much he can articulate really.
(To Frezak): In the closest, you see yourself, and your reflection is tall and certain and powerful, surrounded by a field of fallen towers. You have buried something underneath it all, something vast, something... you don't know.
Greibel: A storm and digging.
Rhu: That's not bad for a mouse. Can he walk? As compared to diving under tables or Radek, I mean.
Gaurav: Was the incident at the laboratory every described to us as a storm or wind of some sort?
Apheori (GM): Maybe, maybe not.
Ganelon: The incident?
You mean the cave-in?
Gaurav: No, the bit where everybody died and left their corpses lying around everywhere.
Ganelon: Oh, that.
(From Frezak (GM)): Do i see one with a fairly happy-looking, ordinary, possibly slightly dirty Gravy with a big hole?
Gaurav: I thought somebody said something about a wind rushing through the caves and everybody running for the transporter, but I can't find it in my notes, so maybe I'm misremembering.
Frezak (GM): I thought that was the sort of wind that comes from a collapsing tunnel?
(To Frezak): Several. You're not sure which, if any, are entirely accurate, however.
Frezak (GM): The rushing roar of failing masonry?
Gaurav: Could be. I might have been thinking about the cave-in instead.
Never mind, it's not important for now.
(From The Gravedigger): This is silly. None of them are 'real'. None of THIS is real. They told me so. I'm just making things up again.
Ganelon: We should probably figure out where to go.
(To Frezak): Nothing is real. All we have are pieces, fragments, and with them we make reality.
Gaurav: It might make sense to stay here. Wherever Gravy is, if I can portal back to this place (or be spat out of the Hole earlier), he probably can too. Plus, Dave knows something and probably these wizards know something too.
(To Frezak): I'm not sorry, but I also didn't mean to. You didn't deserve this. You're too nice for that.
Gaurav: The only place we could go to that might improve our ability to find Gravy is back into the lab. I don't recall a machine for making holes, but we assume they had something like that somewhere, right?
(To Frezak): I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.
Frezak (GM): YES.
THEY ARE CALLED SHOVELS.
Or spades.
Gaurav: Hey, what happened to that shielding artefact Radek and Gravy found in the tunnels?
You took all our shovels away :-(
(To Frezak): Were you then, you might have been. Movement is possible. The camera can be in motion if you like. Let's move the camera.
Bear Soup Guy: HOW WILL WE TEND THE GARDENS NOW
Frezak (GM): WITH YOUR BARE HANDS.
Or trained moles.
Bear Soup Guy: I'll use my trained mole hands
Gaurav: Greibel can actually use bear hands.
Bear Soup Guy: =D
Frezak (GM): Molebears!
You could steal the Gardener's stuff.
(To Frezak): You can't see them, the madwomen behind the voices, but you hear them, all the same, but different, drifting through the mirrors, trying to help, to give some sort of direction, some sort of clue, but you get the feeling they are as lost as you are.
Ganelon: I still have the artifact, I think.
Gaurav: It didn't have any effect on the Hole, right?
Ganelon: I didn't exactly get close to the hole.
(From Frezak (GM)): Do I seem to have all my things?
Ganelon: And I doubt it would. It protects against high-energy sources, not... whatever the holes are.
Gaurav: Ah, fair enough.
(To Frezak): Yes.
Ganelon: Maybe if we could test that in a controlled environment.
Gaurav: Can you try talking to these wizards and see if they know anything? The Ridcully-wizard might be sensible, and they're MUCH more likely to talk to Radek than Rhu.
o.0 ... do you mean heading back to the pool with the Hole in it, or are you proposing we deliberately create Holes to test it against?
Ganelon: Deliberately creating holes could be very useful to us, under the right circumstances.
So... maybe, yes.
What do you want to know about?
(From Frezak (GM)): I examine the ground beneath me.
Gaurav: Why was there suddenly a Hole in the middle here, and how did Dave and Gravy fix it? Do they know what Holes are, and have any idea about fixing them? Where do people go when they go through a Hole?
Oh, and ask them if the pub at the corner has waffles.
Radek stands upright and strokes his beard authoritatively.
Radek: Who here knows about the instability that was here moments ago?
(To Frezak): Packed sand, slightly transparent. Like the mirrors themselves.
(From Frezak (GM)): I begin to dig!
Apheori (GM): One of the wizards (a much younger one) jumps up and starts shouting, "Me! Me! Pick me!" and another one smacks him with a nailgrabber.
Frezak (GM): Nailgrabber?
Apheori (GM): Magnet on a stick. Use it to pick up nails off the floor. Probably has a real name, but I forgot what it is.
Ganelon: Well if nobody else volunteers...
Radek points at the young wizard. "Speak."
Apheori (GM): He opens his mouth and the other hits him again.
Another says, "Well, that's it, isn't it? They just sort of started showing up, and now they're showing up more and more, completely at random."
"It shouldn't have happened here, see. Normal botched spells, they don't do that. But now they do. It's completely random."
Rhu: We saw a Hole which has been open for years apparently, but the others we saw closed pretty quickly. Have you noticed any other persistent Holes?
(To Frezak): The pack of the sand gets harder the further you go, and you don't make it very far down at all before it becomes solid rock.
(To Frezak): Then Amadi is there, really there, peering over your shoulder. "That won't work, you know," she says. "This isn't a digging dream. Isn't a dream at all. You should enter one of *them*."
Scruffy-looking wizard: Oh, no, no, wouldn't dream of it.
Dave suddenly stands up and, pointing toward the largest building with the busted main door, says "Wayfarers! This way!"
Dave then marches off inside.
Ganelon: I... assume she's talking to us.
Rhu run behind her, scurrying to keep up, saying "careful! they have fireballs in there!"
(From The Gravedigger): I'm sick of people telling me what to do. "take those pills", "don't say that', "stop fidgeting" "stop running" "stop talking" "stop thinking" NO. I'll do what I damn well want, even if it avails me naught.
Rhu: Yeah, it's what that priest dude called us too, I think.
Ganelon: And I'm not leaving the Mouseforged in the company of these wizards.
Rhu: He can walk now, can't he?
I'm assuming he's a he.
Ganelon: Well, let's see. I'll try to direct "him" to follow us.
As in, by tugging.
(To Frezak): Okay.
(To Frezak): You still might want to try entering one of them.
(From The Gravedigger): No, I really don't.
(To Frezak): Well you don't want to stay here.
(To Frezak): I was here. Look how I turned out.
Apheori (GM): The mouseforged resists and stares at Greibel pleadingly.
(From The Gravedigger): I am the Gravedigger. Rather be broken that not be what I am.
Greibel tries to calm the mouseforged down
Ganelon: That must be pretty impressive with a metal face.
Greibel: It's okay, we're just going, uh...exploring.
(To Frezak): The Gravedigger isn't broken.
Apheori (GM): It's a porridge-like expression.
Gaurav: *very* impressive. maybe it wiggled its ears or something?
Gaurav tries to imagine a porridge-like expression and falls over.
Apheori (GM): The mouseforged tries to follow Greibel.
Greibel: That's right, this way buddy. I can't promise there will be cake, but there might be!
(From The Gravedigger): No, but the person he /was/ IS.
(From Frezak (GM)): Any mirrors show the... college?
(From Frezak (GM)): It was a college, right?
Ganelon: I'll follow, of course, and try to fix this "beard fragment glued to my beard" situation.
(To Frezak): With the wizards? It was, but there's nothing about it here.
Apheori (GM): You follow after Dave and find she's cornered a pair of wizards, asking in an authoritative tone that they kindly tell her where the gateway is.
They direct her down a hallway and she promptly marches off in that direction.
Radek chuckles to himself and mutters something about pushovers.
Rhu continues following Dave
(From Frezak (GM)): Bah. I'll just.... poke a random mirror.
Apheori (GM): You all wind up in a decently large room with a large archway in it. Dave stops in front of it and glares on it for a bit, rubbing her temples.
Gaurav: Just to check, this is an arch over the door, right, not a free-standing arch sitting inside this room?
Well, standing
(To Frezak): You catch a glimpse of yourself for a moment before you enter the mirror, and yourself looks back, big, strong, useful, and not at all special. Then you're there, standing on the other side amidst piles of parts, pipes and cogs and ducts spiralling through the room.
(From Frezak (GM)): SPiralling? As in moving?
(To Frezak): And it is a room - a workshop, perhaps, though not one like you would use yourself. There's an old man at a desk putting something together.
(To Frezak): Maybe. They look like it, at least, but it could just be the weird shapes and angles. It makes your eyes hurt.
(From The Gravedigger): Uh. Hello?
Apheori (GM): Free-standing arch.
Radek: What are we doing here, Dave?
(To Frezak): He mutters something. It sounds like "Go away, it's not business," but you're not really sure. All the sound here is wrong. The colours are muted, but brighter.
Rhu: Rhu walks around the arch, looking for sphinxes.
Gaurav: sorry ooc
Dave: Yes.
(From Frezak (GM)): I'll try and find an exit.
Dave: Er, that is...
Apheori (GM): The space in the archway goes opaque as the gateway opens into a portal thing.
Dave: This.
Come.
Dave walks into it and disappears.
Rhu looks at everybody else
Rhu shrugs
Rhu follows Dave into the archway/gateway/portal/thing
Greibel: Um...
Right, okay.
Greibel walks in cautiously
(To Frezak): There's a door in the other direction, opposite the old man. Did you come through that? You don't remember, but you think you got what you came here for even though you don't remember what that was, either. So yes, door. You need to get back, after all.
Apheori (GM): The mouseforged runs after as soon as it sees Greibel disappear, and passes through as well.
Ganelon: I'll be a little more careful and try to determine where this will take me.
rolling 1d20+11 Arcana
(
12
)
+11
=
23
Even if it's just something as vague as "not oblivion".
Gaurav: or "out"
the teleported was booby trapped, so who knows if this is too
Apheori (GM): You determine that it is a portal that goes somewhere else, and seems to go both ways.
(From Frezak (GM)): COME HERE, DOOR!
Ganelon: Good enough.
I'll enter.
(To Frezak): Their door or yours?
(From Frezak (GM)): The one I can see, of course.
(To Frezak): You want it to come to you?
(To Frezak): Very well. You are now standing in front of the door. It is unclear if you moved to it or it came to you, but here it is, and here you are.
Apheori (GM): Okay it's been a few hours let's call it a day.
Apheori (GM) runs away.
Gaurav looks around
Gaurav: Where did the DM go?
Bear Soup Guy: yay fun]
Ganelon: We just got cliffhanger'd.
Frezak (GM): Gorram cliffhangerers.
Gaurav: It's not a proper cliffhanger until someone does the scary chords.
Are you cliffhandered over on your side of the story as well, Frezak?
Frezak (GM): Um.
Sort of?
I can't tell.
Because that would be telling.
Gaurav: Fair enough.
Apheori (GM): Sorry about that.
But let's continue... next week.
Yes.
Frezak (GM): Never be sorry!
Gaurav: Sunday 8am?
Apheori (GM): I'm always sorry.
Ganelon: I don't mind.
I've always got stuff to do.
Bear Soup Guy: Works for me
Apheori (GM): Excellent.
Gaurav: hullo!
sorry, my wifi died. so same time as today next Sunday?
Apheori (GM): Aye.
Gaurav: Awesome. Thanks for a fun game everybody! See you next week!

Session 20

Apheori (GM) drops Ellemerr into a horrible nightmare realm of ponies.
Gaurav: Oh man, that's worse than sheep.
Ganelon: It's a pretty cruel thing to do.
Ellemerr: Eh. I've faced worse.
Apheori (GM): How much worse?
Ellemerr whispers, "Bunnies."
Gaurav: Bunnies are easy to defeat. I believe that have very weak digestive systems.
Ellemerr: You know nothing, Gaurav.
Apheori (GM): You haven't faced the champion bunny in the uncategorised fractal.
Although it is a bit of a pushover. But it's a... glimmer.
An inkling into what they truly are.
Gaurav: o.0
Ganelon: Well, it's got nothing on the shaman or that stupid ettin, both of whom have far too much health.
Frezak (GM): Also they might be liches.
Ellemerr: That's a thing that happens.
Apheori (GM): I dunno, the bandit seems to be the worst of the lot.
And yet it ain't even a champion, is it?
Ganelon: Nope, just a vet.
Gaurav: A bandit lich rabbit?
Or is it _behind_ the rabbit?
Frezak (GM): Yes.
Ganelon: But also easily dispatched. The most annoying thing is the evades, which can be mitigated if you kite it.
Only drops bombs when it reaches melee range of its target, so keep it away and it's pretty trivial.
Apheori (GM): Until it kills all your party.
Ganelon: That has literally never happened to a party of mine.
Apheori (GM): Because for some reason you wound up with all guardians.
Who are all squishy.
Which makes no sense.
Ganelon: *That* has almost happened, but since I only play Thief I'm always the odd one out.
Apheori (GM): And then the mesmers are like, uh?
Ellemerr: Are we moving on from bandit-bunnies soon?
Apheori (GM): Oh, right, campaign.
Gaurav: You brought this upon us, Ellemerr.
Apheori (GM): Gan: Do a fractal with me sometime!
Ellemerr: I could ruin a fractal for you someday, love. :3
Apheori (GM): Sounds like a plan.
Gaurav: I can ... draw a fractal?
Ellemerr: Please do, Gau.
Apheori (GM): Gan: What's your name in gw2?
Gaurav: Ellemerr: Just this one --> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sierpinski_triangle
Ganelon: Well, it's Ganelon.
Let me get you those blasted numbers.
Gaurav: Campaaaaaiiiiiggggnnn
Apheori (GM): Yes.
So you all are... uh...
Ellemerr: Walking through a cliffhanger.
I mean an archway.
Apheori (GM): Radek, Greibel, Rhu, and the mouseforged walked through a portal into a cliffhanger.
Gaurav: Hopefully not over an actual cliff.
Apheori (GM): Gravy is in a strange place. We'll get to that in a moment.
Gan: You can give me a character name too, you know.
Guys who walked through the portal: You find yourselves in a very strange place I don't really know how to describe.
Gaurav: Once this campaign ends, we should sit around and compare all the strange places we've been.
Apheori (GM): It's a city full of skyscrapers and golden light, with lots of shininess.
Gaurav: Is it anything like Sarathi?
Ellemerr: Did anyone think to photo-document the journey?
Apheori (GM): You're on a street with a sheer drop off to one side, with another archway behind you, and behind that, more drop-off.
There are aliens, though you don't recognise any in particular aside from the obligate elves.
Ganelon: I think I did a bit of video-ing on Sarathi for our report back.
Apheori (GM): A bunch of emus run past and down a side street, chased by a pair of guys yelling at them to stop, come back, agh!
Gaurav: Rhu went through the portal after Dave. Is Dave still ahead of me?
Apheori (GM): Meanwhile Dave walks purposfully down the street, then turns down another street that resembles a path along the side of deep ravine, but brilliantly lit.
Do you continue to follow?
Rhu glances back at the rest of the party
Rhu: That way?
Ganelon: Since you said "purposefully" as opposed to the usual aimless meandering, yeah. I'm pretty cool with following her.
Rhu follows Dave
Ganelon: Radek will do the same, but...
He'll look up. At the sky, specifically.
Apheori (GM): The sky is full of brilliant golden clouds.
Ganelon: Probably *not* the same kind of place we just came from, then.
I also appreciate that it doesn't stare back.
Ellemerr: That's always a blessing.
Gaurav: Is there any sort of check we can do to see if the architecture looks familiar? History, maybe?
Oh, hey, we should test our radios to see if we can get in touch with HQ from here.
Ganelon: Well, let's start local.
Apheori (GM): Probably.
Ganelon: Can we get in touch with anything compatible with our tech?
(Also it was your idea, so you should try it)
Apheori (GM): Radek is the techy guy.
Gaurav: Yes.
Apheori (GM): So you all follow Dave.
Gaurav: Rhu would tap the radio gently against the closest stone wall and then shout into it.
Apheori (GM): Amadi appears beside you, also following Dave.
Rhu: Oh, hi.
Apheori (GM) glares at Ellemerr, daring her to argue.
Rhu: Do you know where she's going?
Amadi: Do you know what time it is?
Rhu looks up at the sun to gauge the hour of day
Amadi: (In a tone of voice that says "You're asking a very silly question.")
Gaurav: DM: what is the sun(s?) doing? Time-wise?
Apheori (GM): There aren't any suns.
Gaurav: Huh. So the light coming from the golden clouds?
Apheori (GM): Mostly.
Rhu: (to Amadi) I don't know.
Apheori (GM): The buildings, too. The entire place is full of light.
Amadi: Well, then.
Amadi continues walking after Dave.
Radek: Tell us where our gravedigger is.
Amadi: You're not the boss of me, little boy.
Dave takes another turn that leads out onto a high road arching over the lower buildings, and you get a view of the overall city - or cities, perhaps, precariously perched on cliffs jutting out from a sea of more golden clouds, towering spires reaching up and high bridges tying it all together. And archways, gates like the one you came through, everywhere.
Dave pointedly does not look at it.
Gaurav: woah
(To Amadi): You should tell him, you know. That he's with you. That he's... in your... place.
(To Amadi): That you're with him, and the other you, and the other, and the scary one. Or something along those lines.
Radek scoffs indignantly. "Boy?"
(To Amadi): But you don't like the scary one, unless you do. You might.
(From Ellemerr): I will. Probably.
(To Ellemerr): It's important. It doesn't need to be detailed, but it needs to be enough.
Gaurav: Can we see what these free-floating cities are floating over? if there's land or sea or nothing below the clouds?
Are there other people on the same road as us?
Ganelon: "My beard is longer than you are tall! How dare you insinuate that I'm still young!"
Apheori (GM): You can't see it, but it looks like the cliffs are just the tops of mountains from a rocky terrain underneath.
There are other people. Some nod friendlily, some don't have heads, one hisses something about Rhu's mother.
Bear Soup Guy: AGH AGH AGH
Rhu: HEY!
Amadi gives Radek a snide look.
Amadi: If you'd asked nicely, I might've told you that he's with me. And with me, and with me, and with me... But now I won't. I don't speak with rude little boys.
Gaurav: BSG!!!!!!!
Bear Soup Guy: Sorry guys, I had a late night and then my alarm went weird and BLEGH >_<
Apheori (GM): Rob! You followed Dave into a city of golden light. And skyscapers. Read that huge blob of Dave's up there.
Bear Soup Guy: ooooo, sexy
Apheori (GM): You're here. You're following Dave somewhere. Amadi insulted Radek.
Bear Soup Guy: XD
She would.
Ellemerr: It's fun.
Bear Soup Guy: It is. Everyone should insult Radek every now and then. It's therapeutic :D
Apheori (GM): Rhu: The guy is past and gone before you can really do or say anything back.
Radek: Don't you talk to /me/ about things like manners when you're the one who just comes and goes as she pleases and never bothers to explain why.
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Amadi: Eh, there's no point. You haven't the smarts to understand it anyway. 'Sides, you'd just forget it again.
Ganelon: This doesn't seem... *like* Amadi.
Rhu mutters something about HIS mother
Apheori (GM): Are you guys still following Dave, or do you stop?
Ellemerr: What doesn't seem like Amadi but looks like her is following Dave just as purposefully as Dave is walking.
Gaurav: Rhu will keep following her as long as she's moving, maybe pausing occasionally to stare at the landscape, but never letting her out of his sight.
Ganelon: Could I insight that in-character? To uh... see if I'm mistaken or not out-of-character?
Apheori (GM): Insight Amadi?
Go for it.
Ganelon: Yeah, because I feel like she might not be behaving like the Amadi we know and possibly love.
(To Amadi): Do you know anything about insight checks?
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+3 (Incidentally Radek ain't that great at it)
(
1
)
+3
=
4
Gaurav: We love Amadi?
(From Ellemerr): She might not be... all here. She might have mixed herself up with herselves. And I know tons about insight, but this one is just a total failure so that's all you need to know.
Ganelon: We /tolerate/ her. That's something.
Bear Soup Guy: Some of us love Amadi
We definitely like her more than than the sphinx
Ellemerr: Amadi loves you. Some more than others.
Gaurav: Truth. We could also just wait and see what she does. Or doesn't do. Or vanish.
BSG: to be fair, we've killed zombie elves we liked more than the sphinx, so.
Apheori (GM): Radek gets the feeling that this isn't really Amadi and she might have some sort of alien in her head controlling her. Except that's completely ridiculous and he knows it. Or does he?
I think he does.
Bear Soup Guy: Gaur: Yeah, good point XD
Apheori (GM): You all follow Dave through a tower and onto a balcony and down some stairs and through some alleys and a hawk-lady tries to sell you some lungs. Fresh lungs. Nice, well-developed lungs. Interested in some lungs?
Bear Soup Guy: http://www.chronicle.su/wp-content/uploads/tsoukalosaliens.jpg
Ganelon: You mean she's hawking goods onto us, or she's literally some kind of anthropomorphic hawk?
Apheori (GM): Both.
Greibel: Hummm....I might, uh...no. Never mind, uh....I can hold off for now.
Dave suddenly stops and the mouseforged runs into her, knocking her over.
Ganelon: I *actually* might. How are they being preserved?
Hawk-lady: Not preserved. Don't need preserved. Is-as. They'll do you fine.
Hawk-lady shows Radek some lungs wrapped in foil.
Hawk-lady gestures toward Dave.
Gaurav: Are they gluten-free?
Hawk-lady: Friend yours doesn't know. You might needs them. Lungs. For the other places. Deeper places. Well-developed for undeveloped.
Gaurav: It just struck me that it'd be hilarious playing D&D as a vegetarian character. "That suckling pig looks delicious, but do you have any tofu? Or a salad?"
Dave: Er.
Dave gets.
Dave: up*
Amadi: ... We'll have some.
Radek nods.
Amadi: Do you have shovels`
?*
Dave: Where... um...
Radek: Someone might need a replacement.
Dave: Dammit, I forgot where I was going.
And it seemed so important.
Amadi: That's 'cos it was, hun.
Shovels?
Hawk-lady: Lungs. Good lungs.
Gaurav: So the hawk-lady is on this balcony with us?
Hawk-lady: Process dirt lungs?
Amadi: Yes. Good. But shovels?
Hawk-lady holds up an odd purple blob.
Rhu: (to Hawk-lady) What's your name?
Hawk-lady: And a gizzard.
Amadi: Awesome!
Let's have it.
Hawk-lady: Name? No name. Names names.
Lungs.
Lungs for the godling. Lungs for lungs?
Amadi: Guess so. He already has a lot of shovels.
Rhu: Lungs _for_ lungs?
Amadi takes something that looks like a plastic lung, like those you've got in med-school-things, out of her pocket.
Dave hands Amadi another pair of lungs.
Rhu: Wait, did you say "godling"?
Dave: Did anyone find the shovel fellow?
He had shovels, and lungs.
Didn't he?
Did that even... happen?
Amadi: Yes, hun. He's at my place. It's okay.
Hawk-lady: (to Rhu) Lungs for the fledgeling, perhaps?
Amadi: ... It's /mostly/ okay. Probably.
Amadi exchanges lungs with the hawk-lady.
Hawk-lady takes Amadi's lungs, both the plastic and the one Dave handed her.
Rhu: I'm good, thanks.
Hawk-lady pulls out a rather gruesome pair of grubby black lungs and hands them over.
Dave: Oh.
Okay.
Radek: I must admit that I imagined the organ trade to be... different.
Rhu: (to Greibel) Have you ever smoked a lung?
Greibel: (To Rhu) O_o
Apheori (GM): It's not okay. Not that Amadi lied, but Gravy's situation is definitely, at least for Gravy, not at all okay.
Ellemerr: Yeah, but it's not as bad as it coulda been!
Ganelon: Well gee, thanks for letting us know.
Apheori (GM): He is in a place, trying to leave the place, at a door.
Frezak: What do you do in this place? There are currently no amadis, or not amadis.
Gaurav: There are gradations of badness. Are there giant fish? Are there zombie chickens? Things could be worse.
Dave: Smoked fish.
Gaurav: Hey, did the radio thing yield anything?
Apheori (GM): (I needed to move the Gravy thing into the main chat because this don't support three-way pms well.)
And, let's face it, two players is enough for that anyway.
Frezak (GM): I'd like to try the door.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You banged the radio on a wall, right?
Gaurav: No, I just said that's what Rhu would do. Radek should do, like, proper techy things.
If you'd rather he did that, then that's fine too. It sounds like something he'd do.
Apheori (GM): Frezak: You open the door and step through. It seems normal enough - more normal than anything else in this place, and you find yourself on a balcony overlooking a world you know well. You feel huge, bigger than life, like you could take on anything, but the only thing around to take on is Amadi, standing next to you and humming.
Well, Rhu's attempt failed. Radek would have gotten humming.
Amadi hums.
(To Amadi): Now here's the weird thing - which Amadi is which? She's in two places... or is she?
Frezak (GM): How familiar?
Familiar how?
(To Amadi): Maybe she's doing the same thing in each, I dunno.
Apheori (GM): You either grew up there or spent a lot of time there recently.
Rhu: (to Amadi, Dave, Hawk-lady) Does anybody know where we are?
(From Amadi): "A holy mix" as we say in Norway. ^_^
Greibel: We're in the caaaaaanyons of your miiiiiiind.
Amadi: I'm at home. And at home. And at home. And... this isn't home. It's very distressing.
Greibel makes weird googly hand gestures
Hawk-lady nods, and says, "A somewhere, somewhere," then, after looking over the companions, heads off into another alley.
(To Amadi): If you're saying things in both places, say. If you're only saying it to some, say.
(To Amadi): We need to know.
Rhu: (looking around) welp, this doesn't look like it's underground, at least. progress!
Dave: I've been here before.
Rhu: Really? When?
Dave: Except I haven't.
Frezak (GM): How big is the balcony? Any other doors on it? How far down is the ground?
Dave: The mushrooms are talking. They're also wearing off.
Please, sir, may I have some more?
Dave mimes holding out a bowl, then looks really confused.
Radek glares at Greibel. "Don't even think about it."
Apheori (GM): A few floors up, the one door, big enough for a few folks, but not huge.
Rhu: To be fair, she makes a lot more sense when she's high. Also attacks us more, I guess.
Frezak (GM): Is that the door I just came in through?
(To Amadi): I'm sorry, I should have thought this throug, but you're in two places at once so where you're speaking is important. >.<
Apheori (GM): Looks like.
Rhu starts walking around the balcony, looking in at doors at looking for someone to talk to.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: NOT YOU.
Gaurav: Yes, I know! I'm looking around on the balcony Dave stopped at.
(From Amadi): I'll try and be specific. The last one was the place with the people. xD
Apheori (GM): Gravy and Amadi are standing on a balcony.
You and the others are in an alley.
Gaurav: Oh, wait, we left that balcony. My bad. So I look around the alley we're in, then.
Amadi: (to Gravy) Have you found yourself yet?
Gaurav: Are there any street signs?
(To Amadi): Thanks. >.<
The Gravedigger: If that happens I'm sure I'll tell myself.
Apheori (GM): There are, and they are completely useless. They point in apparently random directions, often not parallel with any roads, and say things like 'this way', 'to bed', 'half-past midnight', 'out', and 'sometimes a chipmunk'.
Gaurav: Ha!
Ellemerr: IS THERE ONE THAT SAYS MIDNIGHT
WITHOUT THE HALF PAST
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Rhu: Hey, there's another sign there that says "out". We seem to be heading in that direction a lot.
Apheori (GM): Considering the half-past one is pointing straight up, perhaps midnight would be down.
Frezak (GM): Well, I know that Gravy can survive at least a 40-foot fall.
Apheori (GM): Or perhaps not.
Ganelon: Hmm...
I'm going to look for patterns.
This is something I have not done nearly often enough.
Apheori (GM): Patterns?
Frezak (GM): I'll go see what's behind the door.
Ganelon: Yes, in the architecture of this place, and in the street signs and in anything else which warrants comparison with another thing.
Is it all completely mad, or is there just something I'm missing here?
Rhu looks hopefully down the way that says "sometimes a chipmunk"
Apheori (GM): Frezak: It looks like the lab you found Dave in.
Ganelon: If that's too difficult for Radek, of course, just say so.
Frezak (GM): I'll go check the tanks.
Apheori (GM): When you look back toward the balcony, though, it's gone - just the same corridor all over again.
Amadi -that's-with-Gravy follows him around, and takes up her humming again.
Amadi -that's-with-the-others starts humming.
Apheori (GM): The tanks are full, their charges put back, or perhaps never removed, save for Dave. She's sitting on a desk with a heavy book open on her lap.
Frezak (GM): I'll go check the chest.
Is the humming tune familiar to anyone?
Rhu: (to Amadi) What song is that?
Apheori (GM): Radek: The buildings are fairly consistent here, though different parts of the city tend to have different architectures. Here you seem to be pretty deep and a lot of it is fairly dirty.
The street signs... roll insight.
Ganelon: Insight, my eternal foe!
rolling 1d20+3
(
12
)
+3
=
15
Ellemerr: The humming is familiar to Gravy.
Amadi: (to Rhu) It's a song from his head. It's floating around there now, and got in my head.
Apheori (GM): The street signs don't appear to have too much to do with the streets - it looks like someone came and added them later for some reason. You're not really sure why, whether they were just mad, the things are really pointing to something, or if it's all part of an art project.
You've seen worse art projects over the years.
Ganelon: Undoubtedly.
Radek: Have any of you conducted a social experiment under the false premise of creating "art" before?
Greibel sheepishly raises a hand
Radek: You might find these signs somewhat embarrassingly familiar, then.
Apheori (GM): Frezak: The chest contains a few things, largely not what it had before - that knife Rhu took for Dave, a pile of masks, an ornate recurve bow, some calipers, a book or two. A small shovel that looks like your craftmanship but you don't remember making.
Argh, I'll be right back.
Frezak (GM): I take everything.
Greibel: Can't I find it refreshingly familiar?
Rhu: (to Amadi) Whose head, Mrs. Teatime?
Radek: Normally I would applaud such mockeries of the art world, but my point is that there is no greater meaning behind these things... and likely no chipmunk, either.
Rhu sighs
Amadi: (to Rhu) Don't call me that! You don't even know what time that is! You've no right to... to...
(to Gravy) Do you think that'll help any?
Greibel: No chipmunks....?
Greibel frowns slightly
Radek: Fortunately, the rest of this place was constructed more purposefully, so we can at least expect the bridges to lead... somewhere.
A map would be useful.
The Gravedigger: Thinking rarely gets me anywhere I want to be.
Rhu: ... no right?
Amadi: (to both) Right. But you have to find yourself eventually all the same.
(From Amadi): Am I doing this... uh... acceptably? *shifty eyes*
Apheori (GM): Gravy: Perception check.
(To Amadi): Sure!
Ganelon: Oh, here we go.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+9
(
10
)
+9
=
19
The Gravedigger: Well then I wan wait for me to find me.
Amadi: (to Gravy) I tried that once. Uh, more than once. It got really confusing, and then I sort of tried to kill myself and now we're not talking.
Apheori (GM): Gravy: The place feels... off somehow, but you can't place it. You do notice the Dave (or not Dave) on the table is now watching you curiously, though.
Gaurav: What is the technology level of this city? On the one hand, they have skyscrapers, so they need telephones and elevators. On the other, we seem to be in a medieval alley with hawk-ladies. If we walk around a bit, we might be able to find a main street with, like, taxis or something?
Frezak (GM): I'll go check the corridors outside the lab and see if they look like the ones that I went through before the hole.
Apheori (GM): Frezak: The corridors look like the facility corridors you remember, but quieter and darker, fading away into unimportance. The lab is the focal point here, the only thing that matters this time around, as though everything was constructed around it.
Dave: (lab) Gravedigger? Is that you?
(lab) Amadi? Where's Elia?
The Gravedigger: When I decide whether I am, I'll be sure to tell me to tell you.
(From Amadi): That something/someone I should know?
Apheori (GM): It's technological, but it's a mix. Some places are much more advanced than others, and the only elements there in common seem to be more magical than technical.
No taxis, no waypoint consoles, no pillars that you recognise, but perhaps you wouldn't. It is very alien, but it also feels familiar in ways you can't quite place.
Amadi: (lab) You shouldn't be here, Dawn. It's a big mess and none of you should be here. Want a dumpling?
(To Amadi): Probably not, but you could. She's another fragment.
(To Amadi): I'm still not sure which.
(From Amadi): Heeee
Frezak (GM): I'll have a look at the books.
Ganelon: Well, Dave forgot where she was going.
Gaurav: Who *doesn't* want a dumpling.
Ganelon: ...
Ganelon raises his hand sheepishly.
Amadi: (to everyone else) Want a dumpling?
Greibel: Yes, please!
Dave: (lab) You are the Gravedigger. You always were, even that time you tried to bury a ship.
Rhu: Right. If we don't know where we're going, any road will take us there. I say we pick a random direction and see where that goes. Maybe it'll jog Dave's mind, or we'll find someone who has a map, or something.
There must be a tourism bureau *somewhere* ...
Amadi hands Greibel a dumpling.
Rhu: (to Amadi) Yes, please, Mrs. T-- oh. What should I call you if you don't like that name, then?
Dave: (lab) I'm sorry I doubted you, you know. I wouldn't have made that bet if I'd realised.
Radek: Aimless wandering could only ever be productive if we weren't retreading old ground.
...I wish our car was here.
Dave: (lab) Dumplings.
Greibel noms the dumpling
Rhu: It's a city. Cities should have taxis. It stands to reason.
Amadi hands Rhu a dumpling. "Huh? Call who what?"
Dave: Where are we going?
Rhu: Mrs. Teatime it is, then. (savours the dumpling)
Radek: Since when did you begin concerning yourself with /reason/?
The Gravedigger: No, you're right.
They always used to tell me I wasn't who I was. I'll just sit tight and wait for me to tell me who I am now.
Rhu: I've always tried to be reasonable. It's just that reality has been so annoyingly, inconsiderately unreasonable lately.
Still, could be worse. Could be giant fish. *shivers*
Amadi: (lab) Well I guess we've both learnt something important about betting, then: Colourless green ideas dream... Dream, beloved. Let the fury go.
Dave: (lab) They were idiots. Telling someone they don't know is only going to make it true. I say you do.
(lab) I say you always did.
The Gravedigger: Maybe they knew.
Amadi (both) scoffs.
Dave: (lab) This is a dream.
The Gravedigger: So you say.
Dave: And I have let it go.
Amadi: (both) You're not dreaming.
Rhu: (to Amadi) Sorry?
Amadi: (to Rhu) Yes. You should be.
The Gravedigger: That's what a dream would say if it wanted to live.
Dave: (lab) I am dreaming. You're in my dream right now, talking to me like fragments of a past that never happened, and maybe it didn't. It's fine, though. It's fine. Elia survived, at least.
Gaurav: We could do the usual thing we do when we don't know what to do, i.e. ask Greibel to do his flock of birds thing and scan the surroundings.
Dave: (street, in a mumble) We all are.
Ganelon: That's the usual thing?
Well, I like it as an idea.
Apheori (GM): Urgh, this is confusing.
Amadi rises up, claps her hands, and grins at Rhu. "Well, then! Let's go." And she starts walking.
Apheori (GM): I mean, having two separate things works, but two separate things where there are folks in both places?
Apheori (GM) flails.
Ganelon: Yes, your weird dialogue about dreams *is* confusing, miss.
The Gravedigger: So I'm not dreaming so I won't come and get me?
Gaurav: I'm happy to pause either timeline while the other finishes, if that'd help.
The Gravedigger: Well. Damn.
Ganelon: The added complication of it taking place in two separate locations is honestly a pittance compared to how confusing the words themselves are.
Rhu: Okay, so.
Frezak (GM): You pansy.
Rhu: (points at Amadi) We *aren't* dreaming.
Bear Soup Guy: Both timelines with the both versions of both characters has been quite brilliant though
Amadi: (to Gravy) The others might be coming, but I wouldn't count on it. You should just... *makes vague gestures*
Frezak (GM): YOUR BRAIN TASTES LIKE PUSSY
The Gravedigger makes vague gestures.
Rhu: (points at Dave) ... except we are. Brilliant. And useful. And brilliant.
Greibel pats Rhu on the back
Greibel: If there's one thing we are, it's definitely that...brilliant. That's what we are...we sure are.
Ellemerr: Are the vague gestures helping? :3
Dave makes some vague guestures as well. (street)
Dave stops.
Dave: Why did I do that?
Rhu: Well, as long as we're heading somewhere new ... (follows Amadi)
Dave follows as well.
(From Ellemerr): I have no idea where I'm going. Of course. But Amadi might. I dunno.
Radek: Yes, yes, fine. We can't possibly get more lost than we already are, after all.
Frezak (GM): I'll feel about for the universe.
Gaurav: Might be a good idea to get an aerial recee as well. Unless they have planes or drones here.
Frezak (GM): Like I did when I filled the hole.
Apheori (GM): The street Amadi leads you guys down a few other streets and up, back onto some more open areas with bigger, vaulted buildings. There are several gateway-arches in various directions, and you wind up in a grand plaza with people scattered about.
There are some flying things - some birds, some... possibly not birds, some random objects hovering. They drift in and out of the clouds from time to time, much more visible here than they were from where you entered.
Gravy: You realise what's wrong with the universe, in a way - it's thinner. You can see blackness beyond it, like it was all drawn out on a whole lot of nothing, a little pocket to live in, or in the not Dave's case, to dream in. She did this, retreated here, because... why?
You don't know.
Dave: (lab) I should have told you. I'm sorry I didn't.
The Gravedigger: Well that helps us both a bunch.
Dave: (lab, to Amadi) Would it have changed anything?
Amadi: (lab) Everything changes everything.
Gaurav: (to Amadi and Dave) Did that hawk-lady call one of you "godling"?
Rhu: (to Amadi and Dave) Did that hawk-lady call one of you "godling"?
The Gravedigger: SO are we done hiding?
Amadi: (to Rhu) What who now?
Rhu: I'm not sure you CAN be a godling, can you? You can either be a god or not. I don't see how you can have an in-between.
Amadi: (to Gravy) I dunno, are you ready to meet yourself?
Dave: (to Rhu) Huh?
The Gravedigger: I dunno.
I'd have to ask me first, wouldn't I?
Amadi: (to Rhu) Well, you're /clearly/ the expert.
(to Gravy) Go on, then.
Ellemerr: Actually I should've used Rhu's for both again, there.
Dave: (lab) I wonder if I even told myself.
Rhu: (to Amadi) It just doesn't make sense. I never said it wasn't possible.
Dave: (lab) I mean, if I'd known, would I have done it? If I had known the cost of all of this?
Rhu: I wonder if those wizards know about this place.
Frezak (GM): I'll scoop through nothing until I get where I need to go.
Dave: Demigods. The Nawlin had gorgons.
(to rhu)
Frezak (GM): I'm sure I'll tell me when I know.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+8 religion check to see if I know anything about demigods, Nawlin or gorgons.
(
4
)
+8
=
12
Apheori (GM): Frezak: You scoop through nothing and dig your way into the black, and it begins to close behind you. Before it surround you completely, you hear the Dave in the lab say, "I never told you that this was the cost to close the holes. I never told you." Then everything is dark and you are digging, digging, like when you failed your sanity check with Radek.
Frezak (GM): I'm in the zone.
Ganelon: Uh oh.
He doesn't have anyone to tell him that it's not a shovel.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: The word 'sorenai' comes to mind, but you can't remember what it means.
Frezak (GM): I have 12 int, I'll have you know.
Rhu: (to Dave) What's a "sorenai"? I'm thinking of sorenai all of a sudden.
Ganelon: Hey, I'm just examining past behaviour.
Apheori (GM): Frezak: Aye, you're not stupid, despite folks' impressions.
Ganelon: I've never once thought of Gravy as stupid.
Apheori (GM): But you don't need to be stupid to lose your mind.
Frezak (GM): Well, yeah.
Ellemerr: (to Gravy, although she ain't there, probably) It is dark. You are likely to be eaten by a grue. Remember what your mother said. This isn't California. Remember to always close the door behind you if you want to go back.
Frezak (GM): Gravy didn't even start this adventure with one.
Ellemerr: Except, you know, as Amadi. Because she's the crazy one, not I.
Gaurav: That's good advice.
Dave gestures vaguely at Rhu and then shrugs.
Frezak (GM): I'm not scared of grues.
Because if there are grues....
I WILL BURY THE DARK.
Ellemerr: Heeeee
Rhu: (to Dave) I don't suppose you've remembered where you were heading, do you?
Amadi: (still to Gravy) Please be gone. Please come back. Please, please, /please/ be asleep next time.
Dave: (to Rhu) I don't remember anything. I remember too much. I see... things. I don't understand.
Amadi: (to Rhu) Holes, you know.
Ganelon: I feel compelled to share a perhaps obscure reference.
Rhu: (looks at Dave with concern, then, to Amadi) I've been through a Hole. Well, two. They didn't mess up my memories.
Ellemerr: That is a thing you should do, Gan.
Gaurav: Gan: DO IT
The Gravedigger: ...
...
They never said please.
Amadi: (to Rhu) But did the holes go through you?
Apheori (GM): Okay, thing with the two places at once is now over.
Ellemerr: Aaaaw, but I was having such fuuuun!
Apheori (GM): Gravy went somewhere where he can be rescued. He is now being rescued.
Ganelon: "From here on, walk with one eye closed. Give one eye to Ginko in order to get away from the darkness, but close the other eye tightly, so that you'll see the sunlight again."
Apheori (GM): Gravy: YOU HAVE BEEN RESCUED.
Ellemerr: Gan I love you (though I have no idea what that was)
Ganelon: I'll make sure you see it someday.
Gaurav: (to Amadi) Huh, I guess not. Do you think that's what happened to Dave?
Rhu: (to Amadi) Huh, I guess not. Do you think that's what happened to Dave?
Amadi: I know what happened to Dave. I happened. She happened.
Apheori (GM): Gravy: You are no longer in the blackness, but on a dusty street, following a man in grey robes. You don't really know why, but you have a vague recollection of a vast room and someone telling you that "We're just going to pretend you're dead. You're not really dead, but it simplifies things..."
Rhu: (to Amadi) How do you mean, "happened"?
Apheori (GM): Gravy: Now this man leads you to an archway, vaulted and tall, and it opens up into a portal. "Come," he says, and leads you through, out of the grey city with the empty sky and into the golden city of light and shadow.
Amadi: Oh look! Things are happening!
Amadi points at something.
Apheori (GM): Gan: That was lovely, whatever it was.
Dave: It looks like something.
What happened?
Ganelon: Something?
Where?
Apheori (GM): Something is a cat sitting on a pole with a bunch of people around it.
Gaurav: A sphinxy cat?
Ganelon: If it's the sphinx, I'm hiding.
Gaurav: has the crowd on the plaza noticed?
Ganelon: Radek is not prepared to face the wrath of an animal that he personally shot to "death".
Gaurav: or was it always there and we just didn't see it?
Apheori (GM): Normal cat. It's not enough for most of the crowd, but it's drawn some interest around it.
Probably there already.
Amadi goes and pets the cat.
Rhu: (to Amadi) How Do you mean, "happened"?
Ellemerr: Happened! It came to pass! Occured!
Except, *again*, IC.
Apheori (GM): The cat purrs and pushes its nose into Amadi's hand. Some of the folks gathered about are surprised by this and leave. Others say things like 'awww'.
Rhu: So you know what Dave was like before .. the two of you happened?
maybe if you tell her about herself, she'll remember something? it might help her be less ... angry. Or upset.
Amadi squeels and puts her own nose on the cat's paw.
Radek: Or it might agitate her further, like when her /heart stopped/.
...Say, do you suppose those are sold here, too?
Ganelon: Second line devoid of snark.
Amadi: Hearts are more expensive. Almost as bad as livers.
Amadi ignores Rhu's question and pets the cat more.
Dave eyes Rhu worriedly.
Gaurav: ...
I feel like Rhu should do something, but what?Any ideas?
Apheori (GM): Who knows.
Frezak!
Ganelon: I don't know. It's an important question, but it seems you're only just coming to the realization that Amadi doesn't really give straight answers.
(To Amadi): You should tell him what Dave is.
(To Amadi): Dave being the broken god's personified wrath, and all. It could be funny.
Ellemerr: He could always ask again.
Gaurav: This just seems to be the most interesting response we've had from Amadi and Dave in a while.
Frezak (GM): WHat?
Apheori (GM): He should ask again.
Frezak (GM): I don't know where I am.
Ganelon: It's true, there's nothing wrong with being insistent.
Frezak (GM): Beyond 'the city'
Gaurav: I kind of want to pull out something from the past "... is that what the butler said when you STABBED HIM IN THE LIBRARY WITH THE BUTTER KNIFE", that sort of thing.
Ganelon: Radek's going to go check out these archways.
Frezak (GM): "stabbed him with the library"
Ellemerr: You could totes try that. You'd get a proper answer, I promise.
Gaurav: A libraryworth of paper cuts
Ganelon: Are they all portals? Do they all lead to different places? Can he tell where?
Stuff like that.
Apheori (GM): Frezak: You're following a guy. He leads you into the same plaza where the others are, but you don't know that yet. Do you say anything, or whatnot? It'll have taken you until around now for it to even occur to you that this is odd, mind - you're slowly coming back to your senses after everything just sort of not mattering at all.
What organ is the library?
Ganelon: Definitely part of the brain.
Rhu: *sighs* I guess Radek's right. That might make Dave worse/
Frezak (GM): Everything is odd.
So once we get to the plaza, where does he go?
Amadi: Worse would be bad. She's already the collective wrath.
Rhu: It just seems sad that she doesn't remember anything about herself. There's something ... awfully incompletely about that.
Ganelon: Like the... hippocampus.
Apheori (GM): Radek: They're mostly all portals, some leading specific places, others fuzzier. A few seem dead.
Frezak: He leads you to the others.
Rhu prays to Hazz to help Dave, in whatever way would most help Dave, he guesses.
Apheori (GM): The others: A guy in grey who looks suspiciously familiar to Rhu walks up to you.
Gravy following.
You all see each other.
The Gravedigger: Hey guys.
Apheori (GM): The guy in grey leaves.
Radek: Is that...
Rhu: HEY!
WAIT!
Amadi runs over and hugs Gravy, bringing the cat along.
The Gravedigger: Thanks, grey guy.
Radek: What in the nine classical hells are you doing here?
Rhu: (this is to the guy in grey)
The Gravedigger: Great to see you too, Radek.
Amadi: Please don't ever let us do that again.
Rhu: Hi, Gravy! WHERE DID THAT GUY GO?
Radek: Actually, do you know where "here" is? We might be the ones who don't belong.
The Gravedigger shrugs.
The Gravedigger: I'm not a planar geographer.
Amadi: My head is the worst mess and my head is an even worse mess and I don't even want to get started on my head.
Apheori (GM): Some folks pass by and you see the guy again as he turns back. He says to Rhu, "Yes?"
Rhu: You ... you ...
Ganelon: Come on, Rhu. Big reveal time.
Frezak (GM): Should be pretty obvious now.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: He smiles a very slight smile and then turns back and properly leaves this time.
Rhu: You're that guy from the hall in the city of the dead!
Frezak (GM): Yeah, that.
Rhu: The one with the throne. And the sphinx.
Apheori (GM): He's gone.
Rhu: And -- hey, where'd you go?
Ellemerr: Yesssssssssssss
The Gravedigger: Wait, the sphinx was his?
Damn.
Rhu: I don't think it was his. I think it was just moping around.
But he stood in front of a throne and stuff. I think he was in charge?
(From Ellemerr): Do I know him? Is he a god?
(From Ellemerr): Is he something *worse*?
Rhu: He might be Kyrule or Eapherod. Hazz' said I'd met them.
The Gravedigger: I tihnk he made me die.
A little.
(To Ellemerr): He serves a god. He's one of Kyrule's top guys.
Rhu: I don't know which is which though.
Well, he's clearly got some sort of death-city angle going on.
Did you get to the city of the dead? Where there sphinxes?
(To Ellemerr): He's the one who usually does the direct dealing with the newly dead. I forget his name.
The Gravedigger: I didn't.
I was nowhere.
Rhu: Or a beach? Were you on a beach with a cat? And tentacles?
Amadi: ... Not Eapherod.
(To Ellemerr): Folks usually just call him the Voice.
Amadi: Definitely... not...
Amadi mutters.
Radek: How did you close the rift?
Gaurav: Kyrule and Eapherod are not names that Rhu would be familiar with, right?
Ganelon: Really? They sound like gods.
Dave suddenly stiffens and looks a little panicked.
Frezak (GM): I don't think they are.
Gaurav: But not gods that Rhu would be familiar with, is what I mean.
Apheori (GM): Wouldn't have known them before all this, indeed.
The Gravedigger waves a hand.
The Gravedigger: Shovel.
Gaurav: Although ...
Rhu: ... that priest we throw Greibel spiders at said he worshipped Kyrule ...
Amadi is still hugging Gravy.
Amadi: You promised me a shovel.
Dave takes a deep breath, and then starts apologising profusely to Gravy.
Frezak (GM): When did you start? o.o
Ganelon: Pretty much as soon as you arrived.
Ellemerr: The very moment she saw you. I took your not responding as him being very big and her being very small.
Dave: Kyrule was...
Er...
Frezak (GM): Right.
Dave: Chains.
Frezak (GM): Yeah.
Like a friendly Stirge.
Dave mutters something again about being sorry.
Rhu: (to Dave) It's okay. It's not your fault. You don't even remember what happened.
Dave: I lost him.
Didn't I?
Amadi: I found him!
Dave: It wasn't oranges.
Amadi looks very proud.
Dave nods at Amadi.
Rhu: But you closed the Hole, and stopped the giant fish ... didn't you?
(that's to Gravy)
The Gravedigger: Dunno. Did the hole close?
Radek: Yes. Not a trace remained.
Rhu: Yes. We found Dave on our side, so I assumed you'd ... sorted it out. Somehow.
Dave: Out.
The Gravedigger shrugs.
The Gravedigger: There you go then.
(From Ellemerr): I don't think anyone even noticed the Wrath part. I'm sorry.
Rhu: (to Dave) Out?
(To Ellemerr): I missed it too.
(To Ellemerr): Er, not Dave, although I guess Dave did too.
Dave: It's what he said.
Radek: So, why bring us here? To retrieve him?
Dave: There was something, something important, but I don't remember what it was.
Radek: I would still very much like to learn where "here" is.
Dave: Arah.
Ellemerr: Oh that's bad
Rhu: Ahrar?
Dave: Arah. It's... well, I don't really know.
This, I suppose.
Rhu: (looks at Dave funny) Are you remembering things, Dave?
Dave: Do you have a mushroom?
Ganelon: Let's see what I know about Arah...
Amadi told the sphinx a story involving Arah, which terrified it.
Ellemerr: It didn't even hear the end.
It was a glorious end.
Ganelon: The lab guys wanted to get *back* to Arah.
Gaurav: The hologram in the lab said something about "getting back to Arah"
Apheori (GM): And by killing the sphinx, you deprived me of this end as well.
Grr.
Argh.
Gaurav: The Kyrule priests said that "Arah is the City of Doors. It connects the planes, different worlds which exist in tandem. "
Frezak (GM): So.... Sigil?
Ganelon: ...So they're probably quite aware of the hole problem here.
Apheori (GM): Like Sigil, but not.
Gaurav: Gan: ooh good point
Apheori (GM): Since from what I understand Sigil has something of a locked doors problem, whereas here folks often wish they COULD lock them...
Frezak (GM): Kaspall?
Gaurav: "We've got adventurers in the basements again!" "*sigh*, I'll go get the adventurer-bait"
Apheori (GM): That sounds like the Shivering Isles.
Right down the the adventurer bait.
Frezak (GM): It's a webcomic.
Apheori (GM): Frezak: Maybe. I dunno.
Gaurav: Who could we speak to about Holes in this world/plane/whatever? We could look for wizards again, although Rhu will disapprove.
Radek: This is the "City of Doors"?
That's... quite useful, actually. You did well to bring us here, Dave.
Ganelon: So, Plan A: Find someone who might know about holes.
Plan B: Construct this massive bomb, destroy the city, and sever all ties between the planes forever?
Ellemerr: HAH
Gaurav: o.0
Ellemerr: You're horrible.
But a very good mad scientist.
Apheori (GM): IS that science?
What would you be testing?
Science has to involve testing.
Gaurav: It's not science. There's no replication.
Ganelon: Well, I would need a hole to run tests on.
Apheori (GM): Right, you need replication for testing.
Ganelon: I'd love to do just that, but well...
They're hard to get a hole-d of.
Apheori (GM): Terrible.
Gaurav gasps.
Ganelon: Let's start with trying to get the materials to make smaller explosives of a similar nature to this one.
Dave tries to get a mushroom from Greible.
Ganelon: Then we can see what effects they have on a hole... and what would be really ideal would be if I could figure out how to /create/ a hole.
Then I'd put one connecting the world and a small pocket dimension, which I would then destroy.
I might have the dust for that. At least, magic dust should be suitable to the task.
Ellemerr: I almost said "Or you can close them in a plot-related fashion without explosives" but then I realized I was being silly.
Gaurav: We could go back to the world with the Hole under the tree and experiment on that.
it seems ... stable. ish.
Ganelon: Might not be anymore, but yeah.
Apheori (GM): Sounds like you have plans, at least.
Excellent.
Gaurav: while we're here, we should probably ask around before we leave.
in case somebody in Arah knows more about this.
Ganelon: Well, my ACTUAL plan A is still to find someone here who might be aware of the problem, and knowledgeable about it.
Apheori (GM): Good plan. Should we close on that note?
Ganelon: And my actual plan B is probably to find a not-too-dangerous hole to test on.
Sure.
Gaurav: The pool Hole would work for that maybe. we've already experimented with it, and there aren't many people living in the area.
Ganelon: Yeah, it would be a good start.
Gaurav: aw, but it's just getting interesting!
Gaurav pouts
Apheori (GM) grins.
Ganelon: Otherwise... well, the wizards did sort of explain how holes can occur.
Gaurav: they did?!
Ganelon: If we can't find a good one, we could start experimentation by making one.
Gaurav: Rhu never listens to wizards.
Ganelon: Yeah. Something about magical malfunctions, basically.
Mess up a spell and sometimes... holes
Ellemerr: I'm so glad I have my own place I can just disappear to when you start doing that,
Ganelon: You people have your madness, and dreams, and deific guidance, and drugs.
All I've got is magic and science.
Gaurav: But people have been making spells for a while, right? Why now?
Apheori (GM): Gaurav: Next time, don't let me forget to have Hazz give you guidance.
Hazz'ridan must guide you.
Ganelon: I'll feel honoured if Hazz tells him "You seriously need to make Radek's plans result in a dead end here."
Gaurav: We don't need guidance now, Radek came up with a plan.
Apheori (GM): You prayed for something. He will answer.
Gaurav: I'm imagining Hazz suddenly appearing in front of us going "right this way guys, I have two plans: plan A, find someone who ..."
awesome
Hazz is the bestest god
Apheori (GM): Probably with a dead end, but hey.
Gaurav: in him, all Dead Ends find silence, death and completion
Ganelon: If he's afraid of my dangerous endeavors enough to bless them with futility, I'll feel accomplished as a player instead.
Apheori (GM): Snrk.
We'll see.
Gaurav: awesome. same time next week?
Ganelon: I'll be there.
Gaurav: i have a Big Scary exam the Monday after the Sunday when we play, but I hope to be prepared in time for it not to affect the game.
Apheori (GM): Eek.
Gaurav: It'll be fine.
The people I work with literally don't know that I can wake up before 1pm.
Apheori (GM): Snrk.
Gaurav: Btw once we're done saving the world, Rhu would like to come back to Arah for a visit. It seems like a pretty city!
s/world/universe/
Apheori (GM): It's based on a weird cross between Coruscant and the city in the first world in Otherland.
And a bunch of half-remembered thingies about Sigil.
Ganelon: I liked the description.
Apheori (GM): Man, I need to read that book.
Anyway, toodles.
And yay!
Ganelon: See ya!
Ellemerr: Have fun, dearest.
Gaurav: Bye, everybody! Thanks for a fun game!
Apheori (GM) hugs Ganelon and runs off to play with her shiny new toy.
Ellemerr:
rolling 1d2
(
2
)
=
2
Gaurav: Here!
Ganelon: Here.
Bear Soup Guy: Here.
Frezak (GM): I'm in space.
Gaurav: What are you doing in space?
Frezak (GM): Tearing apart a derelict Military transport.
Apheori (GM): All here?
Great.
I lost my notes.
Gaurav: Space salvage? Nice!
Bear Soup Guy: brb bathroom
Frezak (GM): I also don't have enough thrusters to take this damn wreck anymore.
So I'm adding new ones.
*take it anywhere
Ellemerr: I'm here.
Bear Soup Guy: Here again!
Apheori (GM): Okay.
So you all are... what were you doing? Where were you?
Bear Soup Guy: That's a good question
Frezak (GM): Chillin' and being puzzled.
Ellemerr: Big square, reunited.
... I think.
More things might have happened after. >.>
Ganelon: Lots of portals.
Gaurav: You and Frezak were talking about Sigil?
WE HAD A PLAN
Gan came up with a plan
that was new
we don't usually sully our minds with anything resembling a plan, but we actually have one now
Amadi was squealing at a cat.
Ganelon: Of course *I* was responsible.
My plan was to actually approach this hole problem scientifically.
Gaurav: we should approach it holistically
Ganelon: Sure, why not.
We should find a hole and run tests on it. See if it can't be mended.
Possibly, we should make a hole under controlled circumstances.
Apheori (GM): Right, so you all are in a square. Greibel: You apparently followed the others. Dave tried to get mushrooms from you.
Bear Soup Guy: I hope I had enough sense to keep them from her this time
Gaurav: Or go back to the Hole under the tree, which seems more stable than the other ones we've encountered
Frezak (GM): Stable?
I thought it periodically vanished?
Ellemerr: Full of horses.
Ganelon: That could be a good thing.
Apheori (GM): Yup.
Gaurav: Gan: you also said that living in a city of portals, the people of Arah might have some idea about what's going on and how it might be stopped.
More stable than the Hole Rhu or Gravy went through, anyway.
Holes*
AND
Rhu prayed "to Hazz to help Dave, in whatever way would most help Dave, he guesses."
Apheori (GM): Oh, right.
Gaurav: which the DM said might have consequences
Apheori (GM): Pity Hazz can't wake me up.
Gaurav: That would count as a beginning. Not his division.
sorry, His division
Bear Soup Guy: Not if you look at it as the end of sleep
Apheori (GM): I think I may genuinely be too tired to do this.
Bear Soup Guy: That's okay
Apheori (GM): This is really weird.
Bear Soup Guy: We don't really have much time left and I should probably do some other stuff before I leave
Gaurav: You woke up by 8am and got a computer working. That's a full Sunday for me generally.
Bear Soup Guy: ^
Ganelon: I'll forgive you your fatigue.
Bear Soup Guy: Should we reschedule for some time during the week perhaps?
Ellemerr: I'll be sad.
Apheori (GM): I've got work all week.
Bear Soup Guy: Ah, right
Gaurav: We could play something out-of-story. An encounter with a thief or something.
Apheori (GM): Okay, how about this? We do an hour, you all talk to Amadi, Hazz, and other suspicious characters, and then we come back next week and I make it up to you.
Bear Soup Guy: Sounds like a good plan!
Gaurav: That was basically my plan anyway!
Ellemerr: xD
Go for it.
I'm ready to be talked at.
Apheori (GM): So y'all are in the square. Amadi has a cat. Gravy showed up. Amadi may or may not still be hugging him. It's a grand reunion.
Those of you with high perception and/or insight may notice that Dave looks both relieved and annoyed.
Go talk to Amadi.
Frezak (GM): Why would we talk to Amadi?
Rhu ends his prayer to Hazz with a cough of reverence
Amadi is still totally hugging Gravy. She doesn't look like she's going to let go anytime soon.
Apheori (GM): Because she's going to talk to you.
Unless you stop her.
Ellemerr: She is?
Apheori (GM): I have no idea.
Frezak (GM): She tends to do that of her volition.
Talk 'at' us.
Apheori (GM): But hugging is a form of communication.
Frezak (GM): Fortunately Gravy can walk with a midget stuck to his leg.
So I'm good for finding someone about town.
Bear Soup Guy: Greibel's been an observer for a while and tends to like Amadi pretty well, he probably has some questions he could ask with no context because he's good at damning context
Radek: Are any of you familiar with this city?
Amadi: Arah!
Rhu: (to Gravy) So ... you closed the Hole, and then you went somewhere, and then the guy in grey made you die a little and then got here?
Bear Soup Guy: Gezundheit!
Gaurav: BSG: lol
Bear Soup Guy: err
The Gravedigger: Nope.
Bear Soup Guy: That was in character actually
Frezak (GM): Sorry, that was to Radek.
Amadi: No, Gezundheit is somewhere else.
The Gravedigger: Basically, Rhu? Yes.
The details are a tad fuzzy right now.
Greibel: (to Amadi) I'd love to see it some time. Maybe we could go on holiday there once we've cleared up this hole business.
The Gravedigger: Well, he said it was best if we said I died. I think he meant towards reality.
Amadi: It's that way. About... fourtythree years by the speed of a lantern-hawk.
Amadi points.
Greibel: Huh....
Dave: Hazz'ridan hates this place. Backwards ent.
Greibel: What is that in ambiguous flying car years?
Rhu: (to Gravy) Do you know who he is? What did your elf-eyes see?
Dave: What a strange fellow. Do I know him?
Frezak (GM): GODS DAMN YOU RAVE
Dave wasn't talking to anyone in particular, mind.
The Gravedigger shrugs. Dunno, never seen him before.
Frezak (GM): DAMN PAGEBREAK
Amadi: Oh, Car would break down. Sorry.
Gaurav: Pagebreak?
Ellemerr: If you press enter the next part will be spoken, not /me'd.
Frezak (GM): Or linebreak or whatever.
Gaurav: Oh, I thought you were asking the gods to damn me for pagebreaky reasons.
Frezak (GM) says that I can do an emote and
Frezak (GM): A text in one go.
Except I misstyped.
Radek: Could you close another hole like that?
Amadi: No! Nonononono!
Dave: No!
The Gravedigger: I'd really rather not.
Dave: No.
Amadi: No no no no no.
Dave: That went badly enough.
The Gravedigger: Also what the crazy ladies are saying.
Rhu: Why not?
Amadi: Yes!
Dave: We almost lost him. Gone, not even dead end gone, just gone, gone.
Dave winces, then yells at Rhu: "RHU!"
Radek scowls disappointedly.
Amadi hugs Gravy some more.
Rhu: Huh. (to Gravy) Are you sure you're okay?
Dave: Hi.
Rhu: (to Dave) Hullo?
Radek: Then we've made no progress at all, have we?
Rhu: You screamed?
Dave: Can you please, kindly, be a dear and ask your god to LEAVE ME ALONE?
The Gravedigger: Well, we're here.
Amadi: We've moved in time! That's progress. Isn't it?
Rhu: We found a city full of portals. That's ... different, at least.
Rhu squints at Dave
Rhu: What do you mean, leave you alone?
Dave: He keeps... talking.
Oh, nevermind. He got the message.
Rhu: Really? What's he saying?
Amadi: Oh, ugh, you too? I hate it when he does that.
Dave: Why does he do that? Do we know him?
Does he... know us?
Is that us?
Amadi: Eh. He knew her.
Dave: Are you...
Who?
Amadi shrugs, sort of lost-like.
Amadi: Her.
Rhu: He speaks to me sometimes but it doesn't always say useful things. He let us understand the speech of people in the last place we were at, so that's something.
Dave: The dark... the one in the cottage?
Dave rubs her head.
Gaurav: Would trying to find someone here who knows about portals something we could do in this hour, or should we hold onto that until next week?
Rhu squints suspicious at Amadi
Rhu: I thought you _did_ know who you were?
Dave: Would probably take longer. Remember, these are civilians.
Amadi: I did? Did I tell you? Can you tell me?
Greibel: Do any of us really know "who we are", man?
Greibel accentuates this with air-quotes
Dave: He does.
Dave points at the Gravedigger.
Greibel: Oh, well that's cool
Congrats, buddy!
The Gravedigger: Hmmm.
Radek: I know exactly who I am.
And I would dare to make the assumption that I'm one of the few people here who knows what he's doing, too.
Amadi: ... What are you doing?
Radek: ...Wasting time.
Dave: What else would you do with it?
Radek: To start? Find someone here who might know about the holes.
If this is a gateway between dimensions, it stands to reason that someone is responsible for maintaining it.
Dave: He's not here.
Radek: And how do you know this?
Dave: Midnight.
Rhu: (to Dave) Who's not here?
Amadi cheers, "Midnight!"
Dave: The name was named, but this isn't Midnight.
Greibel: Seems they're doing a pretty unorderly job at maintenance
Rhu: Maybe if we cause one of the portals to jam or something, they'll need to send someone who knows about them out to fix it. Might be risky, though.
(to Dave) I thought Midnight was a place? Mrs. Teatime said she was going to Midnight when we first met her.
Dave: It's where it starts.
Where it ended.
Dave rubs her head again.
Amadi: Are we then, yet? What time is it?
Amadi sits down on Gravy's foot and tries to make him walk, grinning like a little kid.
Frezak (GM): How does that work?
Bear Soup Guy: Awwwwwwwwwww
My sister and I used to do that too ^_^
Apheori (GM): Probably not very well.
Rhu: (to Dave) Is that where you ... lost yourself?
Ellemerr: It's quite simple. It's like a piggy-back ride, except way further down. If Gravy is big enough, it might work. Though Athyria is also likely right.
Dave: (looking surprised) Is what?
Rhu: Midnight.
Frezak (GM): Are there Arahians about?
Apheori (GM): Aye, some about, loitering, walking from place to place, etc. The group around the cat dispersed when Amadi picked it up.
A lot of them look rather odd.
Frezak (GM): In what way?
Dave: (staring at Rhu) How... you couldn't.
No. No!
Apheori (GM): Just random aliens.
There are some whale people.
They look like a cross between whales and giants, anyway.
Frezak (GM): I'll go talk to one that looks like it has the equipment to speak whatever language we do.
Apheori (GM): Sort of.
You probably want an elf. There are quite a few of those.
The Gravedigger: Scuse me, do you you anyone that can tell us about holes? Possibly from an academic standpoint?
Rhu just watches Dave to see what she does next.
Gaurav: Any humans?
Random passerby: Um... no?
Amadi says in an ominous voice from down on Gravy's foot, "Hoooooles...!"
Random passerby looks at Gravy like he's some sort of weirdo and then starts walking faster away.
Dave stares at Rhu.
Frezak (GM): I'll go ask someone else.
Amadi: Try portals. Portals are almost holes and they do have a lot of them.
Amadi wheeees as Gravy starts moving again.
Frezak (GM): ANd I'll use the word Portals.
WHICH I WAS GOING TO DO ANYWAYS.
Ellemerr: Of course, dear.
Frezak (GM): I'll move at a brisk stride, for maximum leg-swinging.
Ganelon: I'm going to follow him.
Dave follows Gravy.
Rhu follows Dave, thinking to himself.
Frezak (GM): Gravy train!
What about Greibel?
Bear Soup Guy: Greibel follows Rhu at a relative distance owing to his slow and slightly uninterested gater
gate*
Also he's enjoying looking at the weird aliens
Rhu: (to Amadi) Do YOU know who that guy in grey was?
Frezak (GM): brb
(From Ellemerr): I think Amadi knows more than me but I'm not sure what ought to be told anyway.
(To Ellemerr): Feel free to make it all up. I don't know either.
(To Ellemerr): Like the guy's name. It was something ordinary, I think. But not too ordinary. Maybe ordinary in another place or time.
Frezak (GM): back
Amadi: Oh, ol' Bertram? He's Kyrule's. He can be a bit of a stick, but I... think he's important. He looked important, didn't he?
Rhu: He ... there was a giant hall in the City of the Dead, and he was standing in front of a throne. All the souls would pass in front of him.
Amadi: Oh. Well, he's still a *little* important.
Rhu: I suppose that counts as important.
Amadi: Poor guy.
Apheori (GM): XD
Poor guy indeed.
Gravy: You may come to a Random Loiterer, if you'd like.
Amadi mutters, "I wonder if I have any guys... or if she did..."
Amadi: Dawn! Do you have any guys?
Dave: Have? Like a...
Dave motions strings and webs with her hands.
Amadi shudders.
Amadi: Do you think that's the way they all have them?
Dave: No.
Never needed to.
Rhu: Like a puppet, d'you mean?
Dave: Everyone loved us.
Amadi: Oh. That's good!
Rhu: But why would you ...
Dave: Is it?
Forgot awful quick.
Or did they?
Amadi looks uncertain.
Amadi: Isn't it?
Dave: Did I?
Dave looks at Amadi.
Dave: Did you?
Amadi: Oh, well I know I did.
Amadi giggles.
Ganelon: Fascinating.
Truly fascinating.
Dave just looks worried.
Amadi: I totally forgot. All of them. They were like ants and I think when I stopped sitting on their hill they just weren't worth the attention anymore.
Rhu: (to the rest of the party) Maybe they're *both* demigods.
Amadi: ... Huh. That doesn't sound very nice at all.
The Gravedigger: They're the same one.
Greibel: Yeah, get with the picture Rhu
The Gravedigger: THey upset a god and were sundered.
Dave: They weren't mine. They came to me but they weren't mine, they weren't anybody's and I... we... knew that. That's why we did so well when the others squabbled and fought and sought for dominion.
Dominion was ours. And theirs? Everyone's, really.
Rhu: (to Gravy) Oh! Huh.
Dave: (to Gravy) You're right, you know.
Rhu: ... I was kind of hoping that would explain things but no, no, it just makes things weirder.
Dave: Except it wasn't just one.
And it wasn't use.
us*
Greibel: How many of you are there, do you think?
Dave: (to Amadi) Was it?
Amadi looks at Dave like a child may look at her very, very clever teacher.
Amadi: I... Midnight will know. When I am then, we'll remember.
Dave: Will we? What if it comes too late?
Amadi: No. We've dreamt of this.
Dreams, beloved.
Dave: I don't know. I don't know how many there are, I don't know what are when. I don't know anything, really, or what I'm saying, even, so I'm just saying it and trying to listen.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+8 religion check to see if Rhu knows anything about gods sundering demigods or suchlike
(
13
)
+8
=
21
Dave: There's us and there's her and her and the other her and the reaper, the reaper who showed up and wasn't Coraline but she looked just like Coraline besides the colours. The colours were all wrong.
She lost her colours when she died.
Dreams don't die.
Amadi: Coraline is something else entirely, anyway. You shouldn't confuse the good people, dear. That's HER domain.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: It happens, but usually they just turn into mortals at that point. Multiple mortals.
Amadi: ... Or is it mine?
Amadi giggles.
Rhu: What do you mean, domain?
Dave: Seventeen.
The first was the last. The small girl and her cat.
Amadi: Domain. Do. Main. Mine.
Rhu mutters "the small girl and her cat ... and the game?"
Dave: It's what we are. The masks.
Rhu: Hazz'ridan said you were masks. But of whom? (points at Dave) You used to have a mask once, but Mrs. Teatime took it away.
You also had a dagger. I've still got that.
Dave: Wasn't mine.
Amadi: Was so!
Rhu: Oh.
Radek pulls out his computer and begins taking notes.
Dave: The dagger... may I?
Rhu takes the dagger out of his cloth bag
Rhu: It reminds me of my time through the Hole ...
Gaurav: Did we get this dagger Gravyvisioned last time?
Frezak (GM): What for? I don't detect magic.
Bear Soup Guy: I'm gonna need to make some phone calls and then hit the road, but feel free to keep up the chats and stuff and I'll try to read them before next time.
Dave takes the dagger and starts randomly poking the air with it.
Bear Soup Guy: Adios guys!
Gaurav: bye bye BSG!
Apheori (GM): Nope, it's past time anyway. We should stop.
Bear Soup Guy: Cool
Ellemerr: But we were just getting pokes! Air-pokes!
Bear Soup Guy: See ya all next week!
Apheori (GM): Sorry about the delay, and nextweek will be better!
Bear Soup Guy: No worries!
Apheori (GM): Because you shall see what Gravy and Dave can come up with!
Also Amadi.
She's going to be exceeeellent.
Ellemerr: *shudders* I feel a sudden dread...
Gaurav: Next week I'll be done with my Big Scary Exam, so I'll have more time and be less stressed :). That sounds awesome!
Apheori (GM): Good luck.
Gaurav: Thank you!
Apheori (GM): Thank you all for being awesome.
Ellemerr: Yes! And likewise!
And good luck!
Gaurav: Yup! Thanks for a fun game!
Thanks, Ellemerr!
Dave: You know, I'm going to need my cane back.
At some point.
I mean, I'm just saying. I should get that back.

Session 21

Hazz'ridan: Good, you're here. Begin.
Ganelon: Now let me just test two things...
(Rifle Weapon Attack 13)
(Implement Attack 19)
Right, missed one.
Still, good to go.
Gaurav: Are we still in the plaza with the people?
Amadi waves a hand in the direction of Dave's hand - or the knife in it - and says cheerfully
Amadi: Careful.
And I don't have your cane, but I have scones? I should have scones. Have anybody seen my scones?
The Gravedigger: Don't look at me.
I just have these sandwiches.
Apheori (GM): Y'all are in a plaza in Arah mostly talking amongst yourselves. Dave has a dangerous-looking black knive and has been waving it around.There are some folks passing through the area, a few random loiterers around, and a gaggle of giggling girls passing by juggling doughnuts. They divert their course to avoid you when they see the knife.
Gaurav: "gaggle of giggling girls", heh
Are there any portals around the plaza?
Radek: Right. Let me see that knife, Dave.
Apheori (GM): There are a few gateways.
Dave: Knife.
Cane?
Er.
Greibel: They're going to need to wash their hands...
Amadi: Scones!
Dave: Did you have my cane? I'd like that back, please.
Frezak (GM): Should have taken Expertise (pastry)
Dave is still holding the knife rather dangerously.
Amadi pats herself on the head and finds a scone.
Radek: Why would I need a cane?
Because I'm /old/?
Dave: You wouldn't. I do.
Radek: Well, I haven't got one.
Dave: I know *someone* took it.
Didn't they?
Amadi smiles and munches her scone.
Dave: Or did any of that happen?
The Gravedigger: If Radek had a cane it would probably fire lasers.
Radek: Just stop waving that thing around like a toy and let me see it.
Dave: Right, moment.
Amadi repeats, just as cheerfully,
Amadi: Careful.
Dave stops and slashes across her palm, flicks a bunch of blood into the air and yells 'WAFFLES!', and then hands Radek the knife.
Frezak (GM): Gravy will try and step away from the waffly blood.
Greibel: Somebody get that girl some waffles
Ganelon: Does the blood behave like it ought to?
Apheori (GM): The blood turns into waffles and bounces off the ground.
Gaurav: 0.0
Ganelon: See, this is why I ask for such details.
Ellemerr: Bouncing waffles?
Apheori (GM): Just once.
They were caught by surprise.
Frezak (GM): Well, /I/ wasn't surprised.
Gravy doesn't want to get food on him.
Ganelon: Yeah, she said waffles and everything.
Frezak (GM): it's unhygienic.
Amadi: I wear the cheese. The cheese does not wear me.
Amadi finishes her scone.
Dave picks up a waffle, examines it, and then starts munching, all the while trying to look nonchalant.
Ganelon: So, what's up with this knife? If I remember right, it's pitch black?
Apheori (GM): Right.
Ganelon: Like, lightless?
Ellemerr: Yeah. Worse than black.
Apheori (GM): It... may gleam, but yes.
Ellemerr: It's made of shiny darkness. Possibly. At times.
Gaurav: "It's just... black. May not even be metal. No light bounces off it."
Ganelon: Sounds magical!
Apheori (GM): Anyone with reasonable insight may notice that Dave is actually quite freaked out.
Maaagic.
Ganelon: Mine's 4, so probably not.
But I'll totally insight this knife. With my arcana.
rolling 1d20+12
(
8
)
+12
=
20
Apheori (GM): Roll sanity too.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
9
)
=
9
Apheori (GM): You determine that the knife is not any magic you've ever run into, and that it may be connected to the holes.
Frezak (GM): It better not be the Subtle Knife.
Gaurav: What's that?
Ellemerr: But damn, Hester, you don't beat a drunk man with a stick!
Frezak (GM): Heeeeeeeeee
Ellemerr:
Frezak (GM): It's from a book series.
Ellemerr: :3
Radek: ...Curious. Could I keep this for a while?
Ganelon: I'll also do a mundane material inspection.
What *is* it made of?
Or at least, what does it feel like?
Dave: You shouldn't. It's not yours.
Apheori (GM): Smooth, cold, sinister.
It's made of Midnight.
Or it would be if there were such a thing.
Or maybe it wouldn't. It's confusing. But it does remind you of the word 'midnight' as Amadi said it for some reason.
Radek offers the knife back to Dave.
Radek: Hence why I was asking permission. Just don't lose this.
Dave: Like Kyrule did?
Radek: In any way.
Dave: Erm.
Amadi gives Dave a sharp look at the name, and says again - still utterly cheerful, of course,
Amadi: Careful.
Apheori (GM) takes it gingerly and sticks it in a sheath thingy she's suddenly holding.
Frezak (GM): So what now?
Dave: (almost panicked) You don't think I don't know that!
Apheori (GM): Sorry, the knife taking was Dave.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+9 religion check to see if I know anything about any god losing a knife that eats the light
(
7
)
+9
=
16
Ganelon: Well, I have a plan to study the holes, but that's practically all on Radek.
(To Amadi): Kryule's supposed to be the reliable one and HE lost the thing. How's that for inspiring?
(To Amadi): And the whole reason he had the thing was because Coraline didn't trust you two with it.
(From Ellemerr): Yes, I did laught at that. xD
Gaurav: Were we going to look for people who might know about the Holes here in Arah?
Given that they seem to be Hole specialists of some sort.
(From Ellemerr): And that is awesome.
Ganelon: That was part of the plan.
Frezak (GM): Oh, right, that's what I doing.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You think Hazz may be involved.
Gaurav: Involved with Arah?
Apheori (GM): The knife thing.
Gaurav: Oh! Huh.
Ellemerr: Stupid Hazz. >.>
Frezak (GM): brb
Rhu prays to Hazz'ridan to take care of the knife and its wielder.
Ganelon: Taking care of those things is your job!
He literally told you to already!
Apheori (GM): Hazz'ridan tells Rhu to keep them on the move or you will all be eaten.
Yeah, that is totally your job.
Gaurav: It's hard to take care of someone who insists on waving light-eating daggers about! I need divine assistance.
Ellemerr: Poor Rhu, babysitter of... whatever those girls are.
Ganelon: Godlings.
I think that's confirmed by now.
Ellemerr: Tiny gods :3
Frezak (GM): Godlets.
(To Gaurav): You have it.
Ellemerr: *giggles*
Gaurav: Okay. Let's go interrogate some Arahians.
Rhu: ... and let's avoid the wizards this time.
Ellemerr: ... I can't be talking much to people in Norwegian. My æ button is filthy. *sigh*
Rhu looks up at the Heavens and nods gratefully.
Ellemerr: But yeah, go talk to people.
Frezak (GM): Yeah, asking about portals.
Ellemerr: What does the sky look like?
Frezak (GM): Technically, that was the last thing I was doing.
Ganelon: I could tell you what it looked like the last time I asked.
Ellemerr: NOT that I'm looking. I'm not.
Rhu: (to thin air) Oh Great Hazz, you ... wouldn't know anything about this dagger, would you?
Ganelon: I'm all for trying to track down someone who might know something about holes, though.
Apheori (GM): The sky is full of clouds, golden and bright. It sort of looks like they're forming an inverse whirlpool above you, but it's the brightest part and you can't really tell.
Ellemerr: Oh right. I knew that.
Apheori (GM): If Amadi looked she could tell, but she isn't looking.
Ellemerr: She's not.
Frezak (GM): I could use Gravyvision to stare at it. If that's a thing I want to do?
Do I?
(To Ellemerr): It's a portal as well, and it's not so much bright as it's just too many worlds shown all at once.
Apheori (GM): You could.
Frezak (GM): I'm somehow under the impression that that is a bad thing.
Apheori (GM): It doesn't seem likely to blind you.
(To Ellemerr): Should I make Hazz appear in person and descend from the heavens?
(From Ellemerr): Isn't that pretty much up to you?
(To Ellemerr): It is, but I don't know.
Frezak (GM): I don't think i'll take that gamble.
let's go bother people.
Gaurav: Is anybody in the plaza paying particular attention to a portal?
I do like the idea of jamming one of the portals and waiting for maintenance to show up, but that might get us arrested.
(To Rhu): The dagger is crafted of the void, a dead end that spreads and hungers. It is of the power to destroy anything, even the gods themselves.
Rhu gasps
Frezak (GM): Do we know that they're a local construct, or soemthing that's just naturally occuring?
(To Rhu): Find the Library here in Arah. It will have the answers you seek, if any can read them. You have the writers with you. They will read it, and they will find your answers.
Ganelon: I'm all for messing with portals.
"Now this one leads to a hole!"
Rhu motions the other party members -- excluding Dave and Amadi -- over, and then whispers to them:
Apheori (GM): The portals don't look all that well-organised, so it could be that they're naturally occurring... or perhaps someone just dumped them around at random. Or perhaps they were there before the city was entirely.
I think Dave and Amadi come over anyway.
Rhu: [whispers] So, Hazz'ridan says that the dagger is crafted of the void, a dead end that spreads and hungers. It has the power to destroy anything ... even the gods themselves, he says.
Ellemerr: Amadi might have let go of Gracy but she's sticking close.
Gravy*
Greibel backs away slightly
Rhu: [whispers] He tells us to seek the Library in Arah. He says that we have the writers with us; the library will have the answer you seek -- if any can read them.
Apheori (GM): Dave too.
Rhu: I think he means them [motions at Dave and Amadi]. He says they will read it and they will find your answers.
The Gravedigger: "If any can read them" ?
Read the writers?
Radek: Have I mentioned that I hate gods before?
Rhu: Read the answers.
Dave looks at Amadi.
Rhu: The library has the answers we seek, if any can read them. But we have the writers with us. They will read it , and they will find your answers.
Amadi looks at the cat she was petting until she forgot it and let it go.
The Gravedigger: Well, that sounds incredibly helpful.
Apheori (GM): The cat is sitting by a gate archway licking its butt.
Rhu: Hazz'ridan the Wise provides directions to his chosen people. Plus, libraries have wifi.
Amadi: It's not that kind of library, and you don't want to connect to its wifi anyway.
Rhu: Why not? We might be able to get in touch with HQ again! I could check my e-mail!
Amadi ignores the question and keeps watching the cat with an intrigued expression, sort of as if she's never seen a cat doing that before.
Greibel: I don't think e-mail travels through time to far distant unknown planets, Rhu
The Gravedigger: So does your god give us any idea where the library actually is?
Rhu: Um ... not really, no.
Amadi: It should be just where she left it.
Rhu: Who, Dave?
Amadi looks at Dave, waiting for an answer.
Dave: He didn't want to put it there, but I... she...
We insisted. We had to leave something, and he wasn't going to argue, not then, not after everything, not after what he would already have to do.
Poor, poor, bastard.
Amadi: Well, it happened, and it didn't happen, and it should still be there, anyway.
Dave: We were his and he was ours and we made him do that!
We made him!
Rhu: ...
Amadi shrugs.
Rhu: ... I think we should go find this library.
Dave: I used to be sane, you know.
Rhu: Would you like to be sane again?
Radek: Never would have guessed.
Dave: No.
I mean, that wasn't me. That was her.
Dave looks pointedly at Amadi.
Dave: Her!
Amadi looks terribly offended.
Frezak (GM): I'll go ask a person where the library is.
Amadi: Was not!
Apheori (GM): You find a random loiterer. Ask away.
The Gravedigger: 'scuse me. Could you point us to the library?
Frezak (GM): aaaaaand brb again
Rhu: It might be a Library with a capital L?
Random loiterer: Oh, aye. Down that'away. (he points down a raised street). You can take a portal through D'hanna if you've eyes for dark and it'll be a bit faster, too.
Dave: (to Amadi) Well, not...
Amadi hrmphs, still offended.
The Gravedigger: Ta.
Frezak (GM): All okay with not using portals?
Gaurav: I am. Those things look dangerous.
Bear Soup Guy: We could use the fresh air/exercise
Random loiterer nods and goes back to fiddling with a piece of cloth.
Ganelon: Yeah, I'm okay with not using portals.
Frezak (GM): Walking!
What kind of fiddling?
As in messing with, or playing music?
Apheori (GM): It's unclear.
It is making some... interesting noises.
Gaurav: "The ostler has a tipsy cat / that plays a five-stringed fiddle; / And up and down he runs his bow, / Now squeaking high, now purring low, / now sawing in the middle."
Let's go?
Frezak (GM): Yeah, let's go.
Bear Soup Guy: ONWARD
TO BATTLE. TO GLORY. TO THE LIBRARY!
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You notice Dave is nibbling on a mushroom.
Ganelon: NOOOOOOO
Greibel snatches the mushroom scoldingly
Dave looks hurt.
Greibel: Here, this may be more appropriate
Greibel hands Dave the bong with some of his weaker herbs
Dave: The mushrooms work, just need small doses. Radek could probably break it down into something more controlled.
Dave takes the bong regardless and then just sort of stares at it.
Bear Soup Guy: I was hoping she might do that :P
Radek: Do I /look/ like your dealer?
Amadi suddenly screams hysterically.
Gaurav: Has Dave had any mushrooms since she was knocked out by them back when we were fighting the sphinx? Was the whole running-into-the-portal-to-Arah thing completely mushroom free?
Rhu: Mrs. Teatime! Are you okay?
Apheori (GM): You didn't see her eating any.
Amadi keeps screaming. It's getting very loud.
Dave: Amadi...
It's... you...
Apheori (GM): You may not hear that over the screaming.
Frezak (GM): I'll pick up Amadi and sort of shake her a little.
(From Ellemerr): I felt that I had to do something when me-but-not-me touched my key. This was the first that came to mind.
(To Ellemerr): Yes.
Amadi does not stop screaming though it sounds pretty inhuman by now. She also seems to be forgoing the need to breathe.
(To Ellemerr): She only has your everything in your hands.
Radek plugs his ears.
Frezak (GM): I'll clap a hand over her mouth.
(To Ellemerr): Stop screaming when she does a thing with the bong. I need to figure out what the thing is, first, but it'll hopefully be obvious.
Frezak (GM): This is where we need that... what was it called, Gan? The Pocket Dimension knife?
Ellemerr: The sound is not made any lesser by the hand.
Rhu walks up to Gravy holding Amadi and tries to look for any obvious causes of pain or harm on her body.
Frezak (GM): We could just put her down and run.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+12 Heal check on Amadi
(
4
)
+12
=
16
Dave clasps the bong in both hands and raises it into the air, closing her eyes. The bong begins to glow, then Dave as well...
Amadi stops screaming and goes sort of limp.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: She looks positively freaky.
Ganelon: Oh, the Exodus Knife.
Frezak (GM): There we go.
That.
Apheori (GM): Like she forgot how to be flesh and bone and it got a bit mixed up under the skin. Except then it goes back to normal when she stops screaming.
Gaurav: Are Dave and bong still glowing?
Ellemerr: Yes. That's exactly what I meant with "sort of limp".
Apheori (GM): XD
They're glowing less.
Dave looks at the bong again, takes a huff, giggles, then hastily hands it back to Greibel.
Rhu whispers a prayer to Hazz' for the safety of the two godlings.
Apheori (GM): The bong is still glowing slightly, Dave isn't.
Greibel: Huh....groovy
Amadi blinks and looks sort of blurry-eyed at Gravy.
Ellemerr: Now go on and explain what I mean with "sort of blurry-eyed". Please.
Apheori (GM): The eyes are vibrating and glowing with colour, though you're not quite sure what colour it is.
Ellemerr: I love you.
Radek: Would you like to explain what that was all about?
The Gravedigger: Are you falling to bits again?
Rhu: (to Amadi) Are you okay now?
Amadi makes a sound that you're pretty certain doesn't actually mean anything.
Greibel: Glow bong!
Greibel chuckles
The porridge reaches down and grabs the mushroom and eats it, then goes back to sitting happily on Greibel's shoulder.
Amadi frowns, and looks around. Her eyes are probably still... blurry.
Amadi: What... time is it...?
Frezak (GM): I'll hoist her over a shoulder if that'll let us move on.
Greibel smiles at the porridge
Ellemerr: My image of the porridge doing that is adorable.
And yes, you can easily move her like that.
Bear Soup Guy: The porridge definitely makes emoticon motions with its porridgeness
Dave: So many colours...
Amadi stares from her vantage-point over Gravy's shoulder at Dave, then at Greibel, then Dave, then the porridge, then Greibel again...
Amadi mouths, "Did you...?"
Apheori (GM): So y'all head down the street, Gravy carrying Amadi, the others going fairly normally, Dave following a bit behind in something of a daze.
I guess Dave is just sort of staring at everything. Everything except Amadi. She's trying to avoid looking at Amadi.
Rhu slows down until he's behind Dave so he can keep an eye on both of them.
Ellemerr: That's probably a good idea xD
Apheori (GM): Definitely.
Gaurav: Is it? Not much Rhu can do if one or both of 'em vanish. But he's conscientious like that.
Rhu keeps looking around for any religious buildings or statues as we walk through the city
(To Ellemerr): You're less likely to vanish now - you could fall asleep and stay in the world. You've now got bits of Dave in you (including her relative solidity), and she has bits of you...
(To Ellemerr): Of course in practice nothing could change. Just because you've got bits don't mean you're not still... you.
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20+11 just a random perception check for stuff we're passing by
(
16
)
+11
=
27
(From Amadi): Oh, golly. That... might actually be a good thing, of course, but... heh. Well.
Gaurav: oo, nice roll
Apheori (GM): Rhu sees quite a few statues, of all sorts of things. Some he recognises - gods, types of plants, a few dragon-things.
Rhu also sees a few buildings that could be absolutely anything.
Bear Soup Guy: Also Gan, is there a reason Greibel's sheet suddenly says he's trained in religion?
Apheori (GM): Greibel sees the same, and other things - folks on drugs, a few folks who have the same sorts of auras as his companions, a pair of sphinxes, some trees with flowers that could be useful (he probably picks a few), a guy chasing a bicycle that seems to be trying to get away from him (it's driving itself).
And throughout it all, gateways everywhere.
(To Amadi): We shall see.
Gaurav: Sphinxes?
Anybody want to help the bloke with the bike?
Frezak (GM): Not particularly.
Bear Soup Guy: Greibel will chuckle innocently at the bike man
Apheori (GM): You also pass a statue of a robed woman with strings of what might be beads covering her and an elaborate headdress; Dave kind of freaks out at it and hides on the other side of Greibel until you're all well past.
(To Amadi): The statue, of course, is you. Or rather, who you both were.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+9 religion check on the robed woman
(
13
)
+9
=
22
Ellemerr: Amadi is already on the other side of Gravy's head and is too busy looking blurry-eyed to notice the thing.
Ganelon: Greibel is trained in religion because he got the multiclass invoker feat.
You don't have to actually do anything with it.
You get a cool power from the same feat.
Apheori (GM) laughs maniacally.
Bear Soup Guy: Oh cool
Just making sure it wasn't a typo
Thanks
Frezak (GM): I MC'd into fighter so i'm intimidating.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: No name, but it's old, older than anything here. Cold, too, dark... it reminds you a bit of Hazz, but only a shadow.
Greibel: You also may notice that the statue has an aura as well.
It's kind of black.
And scary. But also warm.
Greibel: Mmmm...
Rhu peers at the statue curiously as we walk by
Gaurav: Are we nearly there yet?
Apheori (GM): Right.
Amadi closes her eyes and makes content noises.
Apheori (GM): You come to the Library. You know it's the Library because there's a sign outside that says 'The Library' in about 40 languages.
Gaurav: Does it have a terrible logo? Or stone lions?
Apheori (GM): It looks like originally there was only one language (in fancy print) with room to add more, and then some folks added the other main ones in with similar fancy print, then everyone else just sort of scrawled in all the others in whatever space they could find.
Gaurav: What does the library building look like? Sorry, I just really like libraries.
Ellemerr hugs Gaurav
Ellemerr: That's nothing to apologize for,.
(To Ellemerr): Time to plagiarise myself.
Amadi suddenly gives a loud snore. Amazingly loud for someone of her size, but then, you already know she can scream louder.
Apheori (GM): The building itself is a pyramid of sorts, a bit lobsided, a little crazy, with facets everywhere reflecting the light. Windows, apparently, though you can't quite see in.
The door is also a window, but a door-sized and -shaped one with a handle.
Gaurav: Pretty!
Apheori (GM): I guess this is practice. Can't just talk about anything. Do you go in?
Dave goes in.
Greibel goes in
(To Amadi): You'll need to wake up. Yours will be the best.
Gaurav: Ellemerr: I was apologising for bugging Apheori about all the details, not for loving libraries! I'd never do _that_.
So many pretty libraries.
(From Ellemerr): Well they sort of think they need us so I was hoping they'd wake her.
Gaurav: Is Amadi still obviously awake? Or does the snore mean she fell asleep?
(To Ellemerr): Good point, though they can be pretty unreliable.
Ellemerr: If you look, she's asleep.
Frezak (GM): I'll probably waddle in but Gravy isn't proficient in libraries.
Ellemerr: And you have never seen her sleep before.
Apheori (GM): If you don't look, she's awak.e
Ellemerr: So you don't know if she snores when she sleeps.
Rhu peers at Amadi
Ganelon: Radek will go in, of course.
He might hate gods but he's got nothing against their knowledge.
Bear Soup Guy: Quantum sleep
Apheori (GM): How does he feel about drugging gods?
Amadi sleeps. She's drooling a little at Gravy.
Ganelon: Not too enthusiastic.
He doesn't like drugs either.
Bear Soup Guy: Not even FOR SCIENCE?
Gaurav: As long as Gravy still has a solid grip on Amadi, Rhu's just gonna let her sleep and wander into the library behind Gravy.
Ganelon: He would need several gods to drug for that, not just one.
(From Amadi): Snrk. Well, it was a fun experiment, or something.
Amadi wakes up when Gravy enters the building.
Ellemerr: Unless nobody watches. Then she keeps sleeping.
Or is it the other way around?
Gaurav: Gan: you could come up with a dose-response curve for a single god.
Apheori (GM): It's a small line to get to the thing itself. The guard by the velvet rope applies the move-along, one party at a time please, no touching please, see anything? Oh, really. Well, move along, one party at a time please.
It turns out to be a book - a very large book as tall as a man and hopefully far wider - open on display behind the rope, but not too far. People do need to be able to read it, after all. Supposing there is anything to read at all. Most don't seem to see a thing, and leave with some disappointment. One guy says something happy about mortars as he takes his leave.
And now it's your turn. Do you look? Some of you look, at least.
Rhu looks around to see where Dave has gotten to
Frezak (GM): PERCEPTION.
Apheori (GM): The mouseforged, which was following Greibel the entire time without incident, looks. It makes happy squeaking noises.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+21
(
1
)
+21
=
22
Uh.
Gaurav: Gravyvision GO
Apheori (GM): Perception and sanity checks please.
Gaurav: Gravyvision NO
Apheori (GM): Well, no, just sanity unless you want to add perception ot make up for Gravy.
Ganelon: I'll look
Apheori (GM): Gravy: You completely fail to notice several things.
Frezak (GM): 22 isn't enough to see ANYTHING?
Gaurav: Rhu's still looking for Dave, so I could do a perception check for the rest of the room yet, but I'm not really paying attention to the book yet.
(From Ellemerr): Er. Do I roll sanity too? xD
Apheori (GM): You do, however, notice that the book looks quite old, but in good condition, it's definitely magic, there are a lot of words in it hiding behind the paper, it looks mostly blank, and the guard guy is definitely an immortal, some kind of angel or something from the look of him.
Frezak (GM): I'll edge towards the guardguy.
The Gravedigger: So.... how'd you get the job?
(To Ellemerr): No, you... just tell me what you're looking for. Or what happens to be on your mind. Or something.
Amadi attempts to turn and look at the person Gravy is talking to, but is having a hard time of it since her head is behind his back.
Ganelon: You wanted sanity and perception from everyone?
Apheori (GM): Rhu: Dave is standing in front of the book now.
Gan: Naw.
Just sanity.
Sorry.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
1
)
=
1
I don't know if I should be excited.
Amadi wriggles to get down from Gravy's shoulder.
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20
(
7
)
=
7
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20
(
9
)
=
9
Sanity, yes?
Rhu walks up to Dave and looks at the book from over her shoulder
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+14 perception check against the book
(
20
)
+14
=
34
rolling 1d20 sanity check
(
18
)
=
18
Frezak (GM): COME ON.
I want to play Rhu.
Apheori (GM): Curse you both.
(From Amadi): Well she's probably thinking about dreams, right now, and the lack of dreams, since I assume she doesn't dream when she sleeps in this world, just like Dave. But she's not awake enough to be freaked out by that, and will probably forget it by the time she is, so... dreams, yeah.
Gaurav: :D
Apheori (GM): Radek looks at the Book. It shows him things, the edges of things, the unknowns, possibilities. Ways forward, ways around, A niggling detail that has lingered in the back of his mind brought forth into the light to be dissected at length. Here lie answers. Here lie questions. Ponder this, dear artificer, and see a little more of the world for what it is. It is yours, and yours alone.
It doesn't help, of course. It's just a little bit of something to add to all the other little somethings he would have gathered up over the years. None of it makes sense after a point, but that's fine. It just doesn't help.
Greibel sees things in the Book as well - he already sees more of the world than anyone realises, probably even himself, but he ignores things too.
The book won't stand for that, of course.
Greibel: Huhm....talk about all your eggs in one basket.
Apheori (GM): Greibel is ever moving foward, learning, experiencing, living; the Book takes him back. It showd him home. What he has left behind, and what he may yet return to, if only for a little while, if only in a dream. This home is past and gone, but it is with him still, it will always be with him. It is, in a way, a part of him, but a part easily forgotten and easily ignored. A part far too easily confused for pain.
Rhu: The Book is full of words, and in words there are no dead ends, only alterations, variants, transitions. Ways about. These are dangerous words, and indeed the Book as hurt many in its time, perhaps far more than it has helped. A little bit of blood, a little bit of ink, a little bit of sand. Libraries connected together.
The words themselves evade Rhu, but perhaps it is for the best - the thing puts him at unease, like it would take something very dear from him... or perhaps give something... something else. It could be so, so important...
(To Ellemerr): I suppose Gravy still needs to put you down. >.>
(From Amadi): Yes.
Apheori (GM): Gravy talks to the guy first. The guy says something about it apparently being needed, so he started doing it.
Gaurav: Blood.
Apheori (GM): He also says something about things being much less messy now.
Ellemerr: The blood is the key.-
Ganelon: I'll have a look at Dave, then.
See if she's come to some sort of revelation.
Apheori (GM): She looks a bit confused, like she's not even sure what she's doing there.
Amadi struggles some more and then she says something into Gravy's back that sounds sort of like
Amadi: Wouf ee wowm.
Ellemerr: phone
Apheori (GM): Ack, be right back.
Rhu: Can we take a picture of that book?
Frezak (GM): You might give your camera sentience.
Gaurav: We could try that with Radek's eyebot
Ganelon: I'd rather not have another porridge.
Frezak (GM): Eyeporridge sounds bad.
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Ganelon: I wouldn't mind taking a picture, but I don't know if I have the equipment for that.
Frezak (GM): Well, we have the fear to record stuff, so pictures should be given.
Ganelon: Fair enough.
Sure, I'll try that.
Apheori (GM): You totally can.
Ganelon: Awesome. What happens?
Does it mess up my computer? Does the image talk? Is it just a blank book?
Apheori (GM): Single-frame or multiple?
Ganelon: Let's go with single for now.
Apheori (GM): It's a picture!
Nothing odd about it.
Ganelon: Can I read words on the book in the picture?
Apheori (GM): Nope.
Blank pages in a general image.
Completely innocuous.
Ganelon: Ah well. It was worth trying.
Frezak (GM): So the book is a... mental machine?
Apheori (GM): Maybe. Maybe not.
Are you going to put Amadi down?
Frezak: ^
Also are you going to try to read it?
Ganelon: I thought he already did.
Frezak (GM): I thought I was still carrying her.
i'll put her down should she request it, otherwise, she's luggage.
Apheori (GM): She tried to request it. It wasn't exactly clear.
Gaurav: Is there anything else in this library? Rhu would be particularly interested in signs marked "Staff only"
doors, not signs
Apheori (GM): Guard, another party behind you, someone loitering by a wall/window talking on his phone.
There's another door leading outside.
Ellemerr: If she gets no response, she'll actually raise her head and request it in an understandable fashion.
Apheori (GM): She may have to do that.
Amadi raises her head.
Amadi: Gracy! Put. Me. Down.
Gravy*
Ellemerr: I should stop typing and eating; my v dpesm
doesn't like it.
Frezak (GM): Gravy will 'hrmph' at the rudeness, but comply.
Ellemerr: ... Generally my whole keyboard seems to be revolted.
Amadi chirps a happy "Thank you" and runs over to the book. Before looking at it, she looks at Gravy and motions for him to come as well. Her face is flushed with childish glee.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+14 perception check to listen in on the guy on the phone
(
9
)
+14
=
23
Dave scoots around and hides behind the book when Amadi runs over.
Amadi looks at the book.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: He's talking about shellfish, something about 'the exchange', and numbers.
Frezak (GM): Gravy will plod to the midget.
Apheori (GM): Which one?
Ellemerr: Probably the one that requested his presence, though I'm not actually sure.
Frezak (GM): I don't think of Dave as being as small as Amadi.
Ellemerr: Despite them looking sort of like twins. Where "sort of" again has some strange other meaning.
Apheori (GM): She's as short, but due to her wings she has a lot more volume.
Midgetiness is height-based, though, no?
Ellemerr: Yes.
Apheori (GM): If anything Dave might appear shorter because she doesn't have any shoes and usually walks on the ground.
Ellemerr: ... But I think Amadi does that, too. If I have shoes I don't know of them. Do I have shoes I don't know about?
Frezak (GM): If you did, we can't tell you, because then you wouldn't though you did.
Ellemerr: Heeee
Now, book?
Apheori (GM): Book writing is hard.
Gaurav: I'm tempted to ask for a Gravyvision read on the number and type of Amadi's shoes, just to see if it destroys the universe.
Apheori (GM): I guess Amadi isn't wearing shoes either. How odd.
Okay.
Um.
There was a conversation in #uncyclopedia that really distracted me for some reason. Sorry about that.
Ellemerr: We forgive you. Now give us words.
Bear Soup Guy: Heads up, I should probably be leaving in about fifteen minutes
I've been uncharacteristically busy on Sunday afternoons for some reason
Apheori (GM): The book shows Amadi dreams. Not her dreams, and not the dreams she weaves and walks in her own realm, but the dreams of other things, in other places. These dreams are small, and large, subtle and simple. They don't really go anywhere, and they don't ever really end; they shape their dreamers, the rocks, the worlds, the stars. They dream of dreaming, and they dream of what they are, and so it is.
And it is hers. All hers, or it will be, once she finds herself, or herself finds her. Dave could have been the one, but Dave isn't the one, because Dave was too soon and isn't really Dave at all, but Dawn. Yes. She was right about that. She was right about a lot of things. And that's fine. It's good to be right.
Bear Soup Guy: Although to be fair today I'm doing the thing I was supposed to do last week before running to the ER instead
Gaurav: BSG: eep! Why the ER trip?
oooh, Amadi got a pretty positive one
Bear Soup Guy: Ah, it turned out to be nothing, thought I was having urinary issues again >_<
Apheori (GM): >.<
GRAVY! LOOK AT THE BOOK SO WE CAN WRAP UP TODAY!
Frezak (GM): I thought I was.
Since I was being dominated by a midget.
Bear Soup Guy: On the plus side, they gave me pills that turned my pee orange and I proved that I am a massive child by immensely enjoying that
Frezak (GM): Okay, I look at teh book.
I would also be a child.
Apheori (GM): Snrk.
Being children is fun.
Gravy! You see the word 'shovel'. There's other stuff, too, but you can't quite make it out, words that are just out of focus, beneath the page.
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Gaurav: BSG: YAY!
The Gravedigger: Well this is a dumb book.
Gaurav: BSG: esp on the turned-out-to-be-nothing front, but hey, orange pee
(From Ellemerr): Aaaw, you changed it!
Bear Soup Guy: Yeah :D
Amadi giggles.
(To Ellemerr): What do you mean? He failed his insanity check.
Amadi: You can try it again sometime, maybe. Maybe not.
Amadi takes Gravy's hand and runs to join the others. She looks extremely happy.
Amadi: That was fun.
(From Ellemerr): Oh, right. FREZAK YOU ROLL LIKE A HAG
(From Ellemerr): That ain't a compliment.
Rhu: Weren't you scared? There's something ... not right about that book. Something dangerous. Something ... blood.
(To Ellemerr): So did Rhu, which was even more disappointing.
(From Ellemerr): ... He definitely did, yeah.
(To Ellemerr): I wanted to see him break.
Amadi: Pffffff
It's the Library.
Greibel: Please Rhu, grammar
Rhu: I don't know what blood it is, but there's something blood about it. It creeped me out.
(To Rhu): You hear the book calling to you. Something about fish.
Rhu turns back towards the book
Radek: I saw nothing of the sort.
Rhu: [mutters] ... fish ...
Gaurav: Does that mean i get to do a sanity roll?
Amadi gives Rhu a mischievous poke.
Amadi: You were probably too busy looking for dead ends.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20
(
11
)
=
11
Apheori (GM): Rhu! Sanity!
The Gravedigger: Well, does /anyone/ know anything useful now?
Apheori (GM): You're sane enough to not be compelled to do anything idiotic.
Gaurav: Can I sense what I am being compelled to do, even if I'm sane enough to resist?
Apheori (GM): No.
Gaurav: Sigh.
Rhu turning back to the party.
Amadi: I know tons of things!
Rhu: Blood and fish.
Radek: I saw plenty of answers, none of them relevant to our most immediate problem.
Apheori (GM): Dave is still hiding behind the book.
Rhu walks up to Dave.
Apheori (GM): Also for those of you who saw things, that would be worth a bit of experience if I had any idea how to do that. Since I don't, though, there wasn't really any point in my bringing that up.
And yeah, you all get the idea that whatever you came here to find, you haven't found. Something about these two.
We'll come back to that next week.
Frezak (GM): Maybe I should... bury the book.
Gaurav: Clearly, we're not insane enough yet.
Apheori (GM): Maybe.
Gaurav: Next week, we're all eating mushrooms.
Ganelon: You don't really need to track experience.
Gaurav: Man, I took a lot of notes today.
Ganelon: Campaigns can be run with arbitrary level-ups.
Apheori (GM): This one is!
Ganelon: I could argue that your arbitrary level-ups could be spaced a bit more evenly, but yes. It still works.
Apheori (GM): You wouldn't get much of an argument.
Ganelon: I'm in another game with a guy none of you know, and he apparently expects us to level like three times over the course of going through a single dungeon.
Frezak (GM): How long is the dungeon?
Ganelon: (Standard rules say one level about every 10 fights. We all agreed that was silly).
Multiple floors, but nowhere near that much combat.
And actually, I shouldn't imply that I'm opposed to the normal leveling progress, but I'm just also not opposed to it being faster.
Apheori (GM): Aye.
Well, see you all next week.
I'ma LUUUUnCH!
Ellemerr: Er... no.
Apheori (GM) flies out a window.
Bear Soup Guy: Yep, bye everybody
Gaurav: I knew there was a reason the doors were windows in here.
Ellemerr: Amadi will sleep next week.
Bear Soup Guy: Awesome book stuff Apheori
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Gaurav: Yes! This was a fun session.
Ellemerr: I sort of forgot that this was a weekend-thing now. *shifty eyes*
Apheori (GM): Amadi will be missed. But it should be funny, at least.
Ellemerr: So I didn't tell you. Sorry.
Gaurav: Apheori: didn't you say we could switch back to weekday games for a bit at some point?
Ellemerr: It's apropriate, at least. "Well, that was fun!" *snoore* *poof*
Apheori (GM): After the 15th until the 12th.
We'll worry about that then.
Gaurav: oh, right, the 15th is further away than I thought. my bad.
Bear Soup Guy: Well adios all, thanks and see ya next time!
Gaurav: bye, BSG! bye, everybody! see you all next week!
Ellemerr: *waves*
Ganelon: See ya.
Frezak (GM): THis felt like a short session.
When did we start?
Ellemerr: Around four.
Or five.
Thereabouts.
Frezak (GM): Felt more like six to me.
Ganelon: It was pretty short.
About three hours worth.
Apheori (GM): Had to level up first. Could have done that after. Whatever.
Sorry.

Session 22

Apheori (GM): ARE YOU HERE GAN?
Ganelon: I am here.
Apheori (GM): Now. Important question.
Where were we?
Gaurav: the Book
in the Library
Ganelon: Oh yeah, that.
Apheori (GM): You're in the library. You tried to read the book. Amadi is asleep, and Dave is hiding from her. Hazz wanted you all to come here and get answers from the mad Dreamers, but so far you've got nothing except possibly a headache.
Gaurav: Is Amadi asleep and still here? I thought she usually vanished when that happened?
Ganelon: I think this is an exception.
Apheori (GM): She usually does. This time she didn't.
Rhu: (to Amadi) Mrs. Teatime? (pokes her)
Dave looks around the book at Amadi, and gets a dirty look from the guard in the process.
Gaurav: I'd health-check Amadi to make sure she's okay, but I wouldn't want to accidentally kill her or anything.
Ganelon: Are you that bad at healing?
Apheori (GM): Why is the world would Rhu expect to kill her?
Ganelon: Not to mention that seems a very severe penalty for checking-up on someone.
Gaurav: No, I just don't think Rhu is over the time he crit-failed in healing Dave and sort of accidentally killed her.
Ganelon: Yeah, but that was to treat, not to just check.
I'm pretty sure Rhu knows not to check someone's pulse with the sharp end of a dagger.
Gaurav: Heh.
Ganelon: Gotta use the hilt.
Frezak (GM): He's super wise.
His dagger pommel is a sponge.
Clearly full of delicious antiseptic.
Gaurav: Be that as it may, Rhu will just keep shaking Amadi to try to wake her up.
Apheori (GM): He's trained in heal, right?
Frezak (GM): Can someone insight that 'dirty look' ?
Apheori (GM): Doesn't he know how much damage shaking people can do?
Especially if there really is something wrong.
Gaurav: Shaking her gently. Plus, I assume she's snoring loudly as she usually does, so it's pretty clear she's fine.
Frezak (GM): Only if they've broken something, Names.
And if that was the case then Radek can just fill her with stolen blood.
Ganelon: Yep.
Gaurav: What would happen if we fill Amadi with normal human blood?
Or _Dave_. Just imagine.
Frezak (GM): You'd have to find a normal human.
We're all elven freaks.
Gaurav: Ha! Truth.
Rhu: (to Dave) You okay?
Dave: Er... what? (she quickly scoots back over to the others) Yes.
Rhu: Did you have a chance to look at the book? It might make it easier to remember things. Or harder, if that's what you're aiming for.
Dave hesitates, then nods.
Radek: Would you describe the information if gave you as "useful"?
Rhu: I'm not sure I'd trust anything the book said, even if it seemed useful. It seemed dangerous and creepy to me.
Dave: Useful for what?
Radek: This whole... hole situation.
Dave: Er...
Radek: Or if that would be too convenient, something to fix you would also help.
Dave gives Amadi a frightened look.
Apheori (GM): Was anyone going to do that insight thing?
Ganelon: I'll do one now.
rolling 1d20+4
(
11
)
+4
=
15
Frezak (GM): Only +4? Man, I can try that myself >.
rolling 1D20+3
(
11
)
+3
=
14
Or not.
Gaurav: Rhu has +7, but knows better than to try to insight a gosling. That way madness lies.
Bear Soup Guy: Greibel doesn't know any better!
rolling 1d20+11
(
11
)
+11
=
22
Frezak (GM): Wow.
Ganelon: I also have dreadful news, which is that I'm being called away to some manner of Mother's Day event.
Frezak (GM): How does the stoner get to be so great at insight?
Bear Soup Guy: Stoner magic
Apheori (GM): Wait, which npc are you insighting?
Ganelon: Well, Dave.
I'm not trying to figure out the character of Amadi's dreams.
Although that does sound like it could be useful.
Gaurav: He can speak to *bees*. Can godlings be so hard?
Apheori (GM): Well, Frezak was asking about the guard at first.
Gaurav: Hey, both the mouseforged and the porridge are still with us, right?
Apheori (GM): Frezak: You think Dave is afraid of Amadi.
Gan: Same, and something about computers.
Greibel: You don't think Dave ever actually looked at the book.
Gaurav: Yes.
Radek nods his head in Amadi's direction.
Radek: I take it you read something about her?
Dave: She's not... she's not real. I mean, she is, but she's not what you... see.
The Kanatan knows. He's smoked... her.
Dave looks at Greibel in confusion.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+9 religion check to see if I know anything about "The Kanatan"
(
19
)
+9
=
28
Greibel: Well...don't look at me, I don't know what a Kanatan is and I don't smoke people
The Gravedigger: UNless they are tiny people made of drugs, presumably.
Apheori (GM): Kanata is the homeworld of the iera kanai elves, Greibel's folks.
That said, nobody ever actually calls them kanatans.
Bear Soup Guy: Greibel must've been away a long time XD
Ganelon: I'll reiterate, though: I really have to leave.
Bear Soup Guy: Also baby success, delivery complete, apparently
Rhu: (turning to Greibel) Hey! Aren't you from Kanata?
Ganelon: But don't let that stop you guys from continuing.
Gaurav: woooooooooooooooooooooooo
Bear Soup Guy: Okay, we should probably end
Ganelon: No, really, I can just get caught up unless something really important to my character is liable to happen.
Which, given how someone just talked about smoking Amadi, is unlikely.
Apheori (GM): Yeah, we'll come back to this.
Bear Soup Guy: Well I've got family stuff so all things considered it works out
Apheori (GM): And then there will be BIG THINGS.
Bear Soup Guy: BIG
BIG BIG BIG
Apheori (GM): Meantime we all have mums and stuff.
Gaurav looks at Apheori suspiciously
Apheori (GM): Mums and sisters and cats and orchids.
Gaurav: re: BIG THINGS, not mums
Ganelon: Yeah. Sorry, I should have mentioned this sooner than today.
Gaurav: Cats?!
Ganelon: By which I mean yesterday, when I learned of it.
Apheori (GM): Ach.
Ganelon: I'll say when I get back.
Apheori (GM): No worries. We'll pick up next week.
Maybe after the 23rd we can do a horrible all-out session again and make everyone miserable. (That's when I get off work.)
(Used to be after the 15th, but then it changed.)
Bear Soup Guy: Yay!
Gaurav: (y)
Bear Soup Guy: oh and bye Gan!
Gaurav: with absinthe
bye, Gan!
Apheori (GM): Absinthe.
Is everyone online and is it just lying to me again?
Ganelon: I see four.
Gaurav: I see everybody except Ellemerr.
Frezak (GM): R20 never claims that someone is on when they aren't.
Ganelon: But Gaurav is not typing and he's not one of those four
Frezak (GM): Otherwise it's a filthy decepticon.
Apheori (GM): Okay!
I can't find my notes.
Per last time, you're in the library. You tried to read the book. Amadi is asleep, and Dave was hiding from her, but now seems less nervous with the other asleep. Hazz wanted you all to come here and get answers from the mad Dreamers, but so far you're not even sure if they read it; Dave said she did, but at least one of you probably figured out she was lying, and Amadi... well... Amadi. But you should look into that.
Gaurav: Radek also made a terrible/awesome pun about this "whole... hole" situation.
Ganelon: Yes.
Apheori (GM): Terrible. Simply terrible.
Gaurav: You can't make an omelette &c.
Rhu doesn't see what all the fuss is about -- he believes Dave when she says she looked at the book and doesn't know what to make of her "[Amadi's] not real ..." line.
so he's just going to wander around the room we're in and look around for anything interesting not directly related to the book
rolling 1d20+14 perception check on the room
(
17
)
+14
=
31
Apheori (GM): Also Dave just said something about the Kanatan and how he knows something and smoked her. Apparently that meant Greibel, except folks don't generally call them 'kanatans'; it's normally 'kanai' for the race.
You were investigating that when we cut off suddenly.
Bear Soup Guy: ah, right
Gaurav: There was a guy talking about shellfish and 'the exchange' and numbers on the phone, for instance. that could be interesting.
Apheori (GM): No. It couldn't be.
Unless some of you really like arcane financing.
Ganelon: Spare us.
Apheori (GM): I would love to.
Apheori (GM) glares at Gaurav.
Gaurav: what? multi planar fish financing is fascinating.
oh all right
Rhu: (to Dave) ... what do you mean, "smoked" her?
Dave: He... it... that...
Dave sort of hesitantly half-points toward Greibel.
Gaurav: Heh. I sort of imagine everybody turning around to Greibel with a quizzical look.
Ganelon: "Go ooonnnnnn...?"
Frezak (GM): Well.
I wouldn't.
Gravy would be rolling his eyes about now.
Greibel: Listen, Dave
You're very nice but I don't smoke people. No exceptions.
Bear Soup Guy: s/you/Amadi's
Dave: (suddenly looking interested) Why not?
Bear Soup Guy: Well they have skin and bones for one thing...
err
Greibel: Well they have skin and bones for one thing...
Rhu: Maybe you smoked her by accident?
Ellemerr: Snrk
Rhu: Things got very tricky back in that village when we all got drunk.
Dave: Skin and bones... don't plants have those too?
What if it were a plant person?
The Gravedigger: PLants don't have bones.
Dave: Why not? They should.
Shouldn't they?
Greibel: I.....haven't given that much thought.
The Gravedigger: They're not ambulatory, don't need that sort of internal structure, no need to resist that sort of stress.
Rhu: (to Dave) So are you saying he's the Kanatan? (to Greibel) Are you the Kanatan? What's a Kanatan?
Dave: Are you sure? How do you know all the trees in the 'verse ain't ambulatory? Have you seen all of them?
The Gravedigger: If Greibel is the secret heir to some forgotten kingdom, I'm out.
No offense, Greibel.
Dave: Kanatan. From Kanata. You know.
You don't call them that?
Radek: ...No, we don't.
Greibel: (to Rhu) fancy word for Kanai, old language or something
Apheori (GM): I guess it's like calling someone an Earthan.
Bear Soup Guy: Okay so maybe it's not so fancy XD
Rhu: Oh! So I guess you are the Kanatan. Or a Kanatan, anyway. Except that you claim not to have smoked Amadi.
Frezak (GM): What, so it's just poor grammar?
Apheori (GM): Maybe. Maybe not.
Apheori (GM) starts giggling in her corner.
Greibel: It'd be wise not take that statement literally
Frezak (GM): You said it was like calling someone an earthan. Calling someone an earthan is just shit grammar.
Greibel: The mad gods have a tendency to speak in metaphor at their most sane moments
Radek: I don't think they ever trend towards sanity.
Gaurav: ... unless Earthan used to mean something else. Like, "Roman" could mean "citizen of the city of Rome", but it could also mean "citizen of the empire of Rome" and "citizen of Romania" at various times. We might be looking for an arcane meaning that ... means something different.
Radek: Clarity, perhaps a little.
Frezak (GM): But it's not a word in our language (that is English).
Apheori (GM): But what makes good grammar good?
It's what's accepted and used, is it not?
Frezak (GM): No, it is not 'what is used', it's 'what it should be as established by the rules of the language".
Colloquailisms are not good grammar even if they are widely used.
Apheori (GM): The rules of the language are inherently defined as what is used. That is what makes language language. Use.
Bear Soup Guy: SEEEEEEEEMANTICS
Gaurav: I'ma do a history check to see if "Kanatan" ever meant anything different.
Apheori (GM): If colloquialisms are used enough, over time, they become the language.
Gaurav:
rolling 1d20+4 history check
(
2
)
+4
=
6
Frezak (GM): Over time.
Apheori (GM): Evolution, man.
Frezak (GM): But the word is not part of the grammar of the current age of people.
Apheori (GM): Gaurav: Witness if you will. Squat.
Frezak (GM): So it's not part of the language at that point since we don't recognise it.
Insofar as our characters are concerned she's making up words.
(To Ellemerr): Of course the reality in this case is just that she called him that because 'kanatan' really is the term in the universe where you and Dave are from; the one these folks are from is just slightly... different.
(From Ellemerr): ... Right.
(To Greibel): It used to be a more common term. Like... a few thousand years ago. This may or may not occur to you, at your discretion.
Greibel: Don't suppose you'd be kind enough to explain things sans obliqueness, eh Dave?
(From Greibel): Oh good, I sort of said the right thing then :P
The Gravedigger: That would be out of character.
Greibel: Always worth a shot
(To Greibel): Sorry, I could be more on top of things. >.<
Gaurav: I could pray to Hazz'ridan for guidance if that might help any.
Dave: That way lies segfaults.
(From Bear Soup Guy): Heh, you could be? I haven't taken any notes the whole time we've played this campaign :D
Rhu does, especially about that smoking-of-Amadi stuff that Rhu finds very creepy
(To Greibel): Ah, but for your character, that makes sense.
Gaurav: Hmm. Segfaults can be avoided with mushrooms.
We could give her some and, er, see what happens.
(To Greibel): Oops.
(From Bear Soup Guy): That's how I've been justifying it, anyway
Radek: As much as I would be willing to believe that Greibel has smoked a person in some embarrassing moment of weakness, we all only met Amadi recently.
Bear Soup Guy: Remember the last time we gave her mushrooms?
Then again, we haven't had a battle in a while...
Dave: I can't make it clearer. I wish I could, I wish I could tell you all the things I'm supposed to know, but I don't even know them myself.
Greibel: (in response to Radek) I'll accept that.
Dave: All I have a re snippets, fragments, bits and pieces that float in and out from time to time, and trying to put it together, it hurts.
Is it supposed to hurt? When you lose your memory, it's supposed to come back, right? Not like this.
Rhu lets out a long sigh, closes his eyes, and counts to three.
Greibel: ...We'll find you some help, Dave. You and Amadi, whatever you are. There must be someone who fix this.
(grumbling) Sure wouldn't be that old bugger Hazz, though, looks like.
Rhu: (to Dave) Right. You're ... special, aren't you. It's going to take longer, but I'm sure it'll be worth it, and you will feel better.
Bear Soup Guy: s/who/who can
Rhu: (to Greibel) He doesn't have all the answers. All he has are endings.
Radek: (grumbling) I've half a mind to try fixing them myself.
Greibel: An ending would be serviceable in this situation.
Rhu: So we've all had a look in the Book, right? -- hey, what about the mouse forged and the porridge? Although I don't suppose they can read.
Greibel: Unless the end of this mission isn't a pleasurable one.
One way to find out
Greibel takes the porridge over to the book and holds it out in front with both arms like a child that just wet itself
(To Greibel): I LOVE YOU.
Dave backs away from Radek.
Apheori (GM): The mouseforged is standing somewhat off to the side looking very vacant. If that's even possible for a giant robot thing.
Greibel: The porridge wiggles.
(From Greibel): I have that effect on dungeon masters =D
Apheori (GM): Then it wiggles more.
The Gravedigger: Is spending our time on these crazy people actually helping us with the job we're supposed to do?
Apheori (GM): Then it stops wiggling, reaches out a large tendril onto the book, gets a hold, and gloops onto the page.
Frezak (GM): Oh dear.
Ellemerr: This should be good.
Apheori (GM): The guard guy looks exasperatedly at Greibel, the porridge, and the book, then says something about how if you wanted to reserve the place, you should have just said so, and then shoos everyone else out.
Radek: That depends, Gravy.
Do you want to trust the word of gods?
The Gravedigger: Gosh, no.
Gaurav: Out from in front of the book, or out of the library entirely?
Apheori (GM): Out of the library. Your party is now alone with the book. And the guard guy. Watching you.
Greibel: Super service...
Gaurav: Ooo, nice.
Rhu: (to guard) We ... did not realise that was an option. Thank you!
Rhu has another look at the book
Apheori (GM): He grunts and bows slightly.
Rhu: d20
Radek: Well, if this continues to be so unproductive, I might have a plan or two.
Rhu:
rolling d20
(
15
)
=
15
We shouldn't waste the chance to peruse the Book at leisure, I think. Who knows when we'll be back?
Do you guys want another look, too?
Radek: Why not.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: It says, "The happy badger exudes confidence. Or so they say, at any rate. I don't think you want to keep trying this."
Rhu stares at the book for a while, then wanders away, muttering, "... I don't think I like this book"
Ellemerr: *giggles*
Rhu: (to Dave) The Book didn't tell you anything about this Kanatan or Amadi smoking, did it?
More than you already know, I mean.
Dave: It... didn't.
Greibel: (as an uninterested side remark, still holding the porridge) She didn't read the book.
Radek: ...Excuse me?
Rhu looks at Greibel, then back at Dave
Greibel: Just look at her, it's written all over her face.
Apheori (GM): Oh, the porridge glooped back onto Greibel's head after it was done defacing the book. So yeah. You don't know if you even want to know what it got out of it, but it does look slightly... different.
Also there seem to be two of them.
One in his hands, one on his shoulder... wait, no, three, because there's another as a hat.
Greibel starts staring more intently at the porridge as if trying to suck some information out of its tiny, potentially-non-existent brain
Greibel: Oh...oh dear.
I saw a Star Trek episode like this once...
Apheori (GM): The porridge in Greibel's hands wiggles happily, then tells Greibel something about fluid dynamics.
Gaurav: "tiny, potentially-non-existent brain" -- hee hee
Rhu: (to Dave) Well, go on then! Time's a wastin'. (motions towards the Book)
Dave sighs.
Dave: It's... dangerous.
Dave goes and has a look regardless.
Greibel: Don't let them pressure you into it Dave. Who knows what that book could tell you, you should only do it if you really want to.
There's enchantments or something like that with magic stuff, aren't there?
"You must be pure of intention" or some such.
Ganelon: This isn't magical but divine, right?
Dave: (to the book) Hello?
Bear Soup Guy: Divine magic?
Rhu: (to Greibel) What would an impure intention be?
Amadi snores loudly.
Ganelon: Hence why it's being guarded by an angel, and why a god told us to do this, and why we're here to have gods read it?
Greibel: (to Rhu) I imagine something like "I don't want to look at this book and I'm afraid of it."
Radek: Whatever the gods decide they don't like.
Dave: (to the book) I know, I know, it's just...
(to the book) Who are you? You're not another...
A dream?
Rhu: ... so that seems to be going well. Or at least, not dangerously.
Radek: At the very least, she isn't screaming.
Greibel: O
err
Rhu: Truth.
Greibel: I've always wanted to be the dream of a mad God
The Gravedigger: At least when she's screaming we KNOW something is wrong. Well. More wrong than usual.
Radek: You trust her to only scream when something goes wrong?
Dave: Eapherod.
What do I have to do?
Rhu: Eapherod?
rolling 1d20+9 religion check to see if I know about Eapherod
(
11
)
+9
=
20
Amadi suddenly stirs, and says sluringly, "Oh, not yet, let me dream a little longer..."
Dave: (still talking to the book, seeing lines that nobody else can see) I can hear it from Arah.
Dave suddenly turns back and looks at Amadi worriedly.
Greibel: (To Amadi, sarcastically) Sleep is the cousin of death...
Amadi grunts, and curls up tigther. "Don't like family gatherings..."
Ellemerr: Remind me where I even am. Carried by Gravy?
Dave: (to Amadi) We need to find her. Elia.
...I think.
The Gravedigger: So, has anyone gotten anything useful out of this book?
Radek: No.
Greibel: I got a confirmation of my irrational fear of returning home. That's useful, right?
Greibel shrugs
Rhu: I don't like this Book.
Dave suddenly turns back to the book, slaps her hands on it, and yells, "WHO ARE YOU?"
Greibel: (whispering as if to avoid the book's judgment) I'm still not going back
The Gravedigger: So, shall we go out and try and find any goddam information on these portals?
Dave: What?
Greibel: (To Dave) That's a book, dear. See the pages?
Rhu: Let's wait for Dave to finish?
The Gravedigger: Oh, yeah, I'm sure that'll help us.
Dave: Er... right.
Dave turns back to the others.
The Gravedigger: Let the crazy shardperson scream at a book.
Greibel: (To Rhu) Am I being terribly snarky today? I feel terribly snarky today.
Radek: If I say no, will you continue being so?
Greibel: Perhaps
Dave: Guys, I know you're getting anxious, but it... it's okay. I think I've got something.
What you want, and what I need to do, they overlap, and should provide the means for both should we... overlap them.
Gaurav: Ellemerr: Rhu tried to shake Amadi awake earlier, so I think she's on the ground or floating in mid-air or something.
Apheori (GM): I thought Gravy was holding her?
Frezak (GM): I thought I still had her over my.. no, I'd put her down at her insistence last time.
She's the one that made me look at the book.
Apheori (GM): Ah.
Rhu: (to Dave) Who -- or what -- is Elia? Or Eapherod?
Dave: She's another one. Elia is, I mean. We need to find her.
She's a key. Well, part of a key.
Rhu: Another ... crazy person?
Oh! Another one of ... you lot.
Dave: Or... something along those lines.
Oh, I hope not... but probably?
Amadi closes her eyes tightly and rolls over on her other side. "Yes, mum, I'm coming, just... give me a little longer."
Bear Soup Guy: ^ me when my alarm went off this morning
Rhu: (to Dave) So why are you so nervous around her? (indicates Amadi)
Dave: Have you ever taken the beating heart of another and held it in your hands?
The Gravedigger: No.
I don't muck about with the living.
Rhu: (to Dave) No. Have you?
The Gravedigger: Really? I thought that's what you cultist people did, Rhu.
Rhu: Nooo. We meet thrice a week for sermons and divine practice, and once again for Sunday prayer.
Radek: They tend not to be beating.
Rhu: Mrs. Awami brings tea and cookies.
The Gravedigger: Huh.
DO you sear things with radiant energy during these meetings?
Maybe for heating scones?
Rhu: We've never thought about that. I don't know if you ... but maybe if you focus it just right ... hmm.
Mashmallows.
Dave throws a marshmallow at Amadi.
Rhu: (to Dave) You don't seem so scared of her now. Are you feeling better at all?
Frezak (GM): I'll go talk to the guardangel
The Gravedigger: Hey, do you do you who might be able to tell us about these portals?
Amadi catches the marshmallow and puts it in her mouth. Then she yawns and sits up.
Dave: Well...
Amadi: 'S okay. I'm okay; I'm back. I'm... mmmm.... marshmallow.
Guard angel: What portals?
The Gravedigger: Sort of magic holes everywhere that take you from one place to another. Or sometimes turn you into bits. This city is full of them.
Amadi: Did someone need me? I heard my name...
Guard angel: Oh, yeah, they're just there. Always been there. Open up to everywhere that is, if you can find the right ones.
Rhu: (to Amadi) I don't think so?
Dave: (to Amadi) Are you... you?
The Gravedigger: 'just there' ?
Were they always around?
And does anyone know about them, possibly from a scientific or magical standpoint?
Amadi blinks sleepily and smiles at Dave. "Yeah?"
Guard angel looks surprised.
Ellemerr: Why is my food taking so long and smelling so good while it's taking so long... D:
Guard angel: Why would anyone... well, really, I suppose someone might. Some folks'll study anything, and they do often come her. Got a guy looking for insight into the nature of clouds the other day, if you can believe that.
Dave: (to Amadi) So you're not... damaged?
Rhu: You do have very pretty clouds around these parts.
Apheori (GM): I need tea. I'll be right back.
The Gravedigger: But you don't know of anyone.
Amadi closes her eyes again, her smile growing wider and sillier.
Amadi: I feel fine. Shiiiny...
(From Ellemerr): You'll have to tell me if I'm doing anything wrong. I think she dreamt that she was Eapherod. Which, considering, could mean a whole lot. But, since it wasn't a dream like her usual disappearing dreams... er, well. I'm not sure. *shifty eyes*
Apheori (GM): Back.
(To Ellemerr): I don't even know what wrong would be at this point.
(To Ellemerr): So it works for me.
(From Ellemerr): Cluelessness all around. Awesome.
Rhu: (to Dave and Amadi) So you've both read the Book, right? Do you want to take another look at it while we're here?
Amadi proclaims happily, "I've made a Library." Satisfied with that answer, she lays back down.
Dave: I know what we need to do.
It involves taking her (pointing to Amadi) and doing... stuff.
And things.
Radek: That sounds difficult.
Dave: ...yes.
Rhu: It's a start! Starts are good. Who wants to go find a pub?
Radek does not speak up. He perhaps glares a little.
Dave smiles nervously.
Amadi starts snoring again.
Ellemerr: I have to pay more attention to my dinner for a bit.
Dave: Can we maybe just stuff her in a bag or something?
Ellemerr: I'll be back eventually. Treat Amadi as you like, meanwhile.
Apheori (GM): Always do.
Ellemerr: (Though not waking her might be a good thought.)
Ganelon: What a dangerous thing to say.
Apheori (GM): And eat well.
Ellemerr: Not eating. I can do that here. Cooking.
Apheori (GM): Ah, right.
Radek: Someone pick her up and let's find a way out of here.
The Gravedigger: That, at least, I can do.
Dave: (to the guard guy) Hey Dellis, we're done.
Guard angel puts on a forced smile and forced-smiles at y'all.
Frezak (GM): Can someone Insight him?
Rhu: (whispered, to Greibel) Should we tip him?
Apheori (GM): Three porridges jiggle on Greibel, then merge back into one, which perches on his shoulder looking supreme.
Frezak (GM): Does it have a tiny porridge crown?
Or a maternity dress?
Apheori (GM): It may have a porridge equivalent.
Gaurav: It's good to be the (porridge) king!
Rhu sniffs the air to check for any smell of fish, then follows whoever is leading the way out
Apheori (GM): No fish.
Ganelon: The peasants have no bread? Let them eat porridge.
Frezak (GM): Or possibly be eaten by porridge.
Or inhabited.
Bear Soup Guy: Sorry, went away for a bit, back now!
Ganelon: That would also solve most of their problems, I suppose.
So should we just pick a portal through random selection and enter it?
Ellemerr: I think I might not actually be very good at cooking. >.>
Frezak (GM): I don't see how that would help us, gan.
Frankly, I have no fukken idea how the hell to progress.
Apheori (GM): Don't cook the porridge.
Dave wants to lead you somewhere.
She may or may not have explained it very well, and you may or may not have listened on account of her being crazy.
Frezak (GM): And that allways works out great.
Gaurav: The last plan we had was (1) see if we can find a specialist who understands portals and quiz them about the breakdown of all reality, and (2) barring that, go back to the portal in the tree and let Radek science the heck out of it.
who understands portals in Arah, I mean, given that they have so many of 'em
Frezak (GM): I'm getting teh impression that no-one does.
Ganelon: Yeah, but 2 would be all the way back on... wherever.
Frezak (GM): At least the angel thinks it's unlikely, and when i asked before we got directed here.
Gaurav: if there's been a breakdown in portal based reality, so much so that wizards in some obscure town have noticed, someone here must have.
ah, good point
Ganelon: That's what I thought, too.
Frezak (GM): I don't think the people here give a fuck about the portals.
They're about as interesting as clouds.
Less so, probably, since clouds are important for agriculture.
Gaurav: eh, "follow dave" works for me for the mo'. But we should keep our eyes open for, I dunno, a truck with a portal maintenance logo on it or whatever.
the clouds here are golden and stuff, aren't they?
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Ganelon: Yes, but that could mean nothing.
Apheori (GM): So y'all follow Dave out of the library?
Ganelon: Well, to us.
Yes.
Gaurav: Rhu is moving here once we're done with this adventure.
Ganelon: Following her is slightly more likely to produce useful results than random selection.
At worst she'll get lost or forget where she's going, and we'll be back to the latter.
Dave: Yes!
Frezak (GM): Eh, whatever.
Let's just /do/ something.
Apheori (GM): You follow her! Blah blah blah.
She seems to know where she's going, but she could just be faking it.
Rhu hangs back far enough to keep an eye on both Dave and Amadi as we trudge through the streets
Apheori (GM): Then a woman runs up to you asking if you're mercenaries, you have the look, please, can you help? She can pay well in whatever fashion you take.
Frezak (GM): WHo IS our frontman?
Apheori (GM): Dave is in front, and she responds by tripping over a rock.
Radek: Explain the problem. Quickly, please.
Distraught woman: There's a... well, it's not actually me, but there's a...
There's a thing in my gran's basement.
Frezak (GM): is it rats?
Distraught woman: Can you get rid of it?
It's really big and it tried to eat me when I went to check, but she won't even admit it's there.
And you've... got guns...
Distraught woman looks to Radek.
Frezak (GM): Well, 'a' gun.
Dave picks herself up and watches blankly.
Frezak (GM): One guy has... a bong.
Ganelon: He's no altruist.
Greibel: We've taken on big eaty monsters before.
Apheori (GM): But he has a gun!
Rhu: Big eaty monsters with creepy smiles.
Greibel: (to the woman) I don't know if this helps, but I can conjure birds made of fire. Pleased to make your acquaintance
Frezak (GM): "Hey, I can summon fire. Want som drugs?"
Ganelon: Well.
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Ganelon: I won't turn down a fight, but I'm having some trouble justifying it in-character.
Ellemerr: I was wrong. Either that, or I'm really hungry. Either way, this is delicious. And I'm back.
Bear Soup Guy: She wants to pay us
Hi Elle!
Ganelon: But what good is money?
Oh, I know.
Apheori (GM): Please, I can pay you with...
Gaurav: More like "light your spliff? *flamebird*"
Distraught woman: Please, I can pay you with...
Anything, anything you need.
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Rhu: Do you know anybody who fixes portals?
Distraught woman: Diamonds, drugs, cakes...
Ganelon: Don't you dare add "sexual favors".
Greibel: I'm sold.
Distraught woman: (suddenly looking much more certain) Information.
Apheori (GM): You know she would.
Radek ponders for a moment.
Radek: Do you own anything magical?
Ganelon: Literally anything. He's not picky.
Gaurav: Ellemerr: what did you make?
Ganelon: Because dussssst
Distraught woman: Yes... and I can get you any sort if you need it.
Ellemerr: Er... Ytrefilet med rødvinssaus og fløtegratinerte poteter.
I don't know food in English! :P
Apheori (GM): The question, of course, it what she isn't telling you...
Apheori (GM) grins.
Bear Soup Guy: Sounds delicious
Distraught woman: Heeee, funny Os.
Bear Soup Guy: Yeah, I was about to say though
Apheori (GM): Dammit, ooc
Radek: Doubtful, but very well.
Gaurav: Google Translate says: "Sirloin with red wine sauce and creamed potatoes." Which sounds awesome.
Bear Soup Guy: I'm not going to point at that if she can supposedly get us anything we want, why can't she find a way to dispense this creature?
Because Greibel heard diamonds and drugs and cakes
Ellemerr: I'm sure that's right. Google would never lie to us.
Gaurav: Right. She could literally fill her basement with cake and squish the monster to death.
Gravy: could you please Gravyvision this lady and see if you see anything?
Ganelon: That's perception, not insight.
Gaurav: oh, right
Ganelon: Of course, we have high-wisdom people in abundance.
Apheori (GM): Man, you're fancy. And you say not a good cook?
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+7 insight check on distraught woman
(
19
)
+7
=
26
Ellemerr: Lady, I put a pre-mix in a form and that into the oven, and plopped some pieces of meat in a frying pan and hoped for the best.
I was pretty sure I'd ruined it at one point.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: She's leaving something out. Either she's lying about the resources she can offer, or there's something more about what she wants you to do than just a simple monster removal. There's no reason she'd be so desperate otherwise.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+10+10+2
(
7
)
+10+10+2
=
29
Perception.
Apheori (GM): Ellemerr: How would you get that wrong?
Then?
Ellemerr: By being a really bad cook.
Rhu explains all that to the group
Apheori (GM): Gravy notices she's got splotches of stuff on her clothes, and a few old bloodstains that have been through the wash a few times. Whatever it is, it ain't new. Also she smells funny.
Rhu: I say we see what's up and then decide if we want any part of it, but I'm also happy pointing her to the nearest police station (or to that town with all the town guards in it) and following Dave.
Gaurav: sorry, ooc
Frezak (GM): I think she's a murderer and wants to sacrifice us to a thing in the well.
I say we go, and then throw her into the well and leave.
Ellemerr: She has a well in her granny's basement?
Apheori (GM): She could!
Frezak (GM): I thought someone said well.
Also why not.
Bear Soup Guy: "A well in the basement?! That would be ABSURD. Now come on, let's get back to this world full of time-space portals and split shards of deities and sentient porridge."
Ellemerr: *giggles*
Apheori (GM): Heh.
Frezak (GM): Well.
I say we go, tuen on her, and take her stuff.
Ganelon: Next you're going to suggest that someone would wear socks and sandals.
Frezak (GM): Then go get a reward from the local law enforcement.
Gaurav: Greibel: hahaha
Bear Soup Guy: Something useful might happen and we're totally definitely not incompetent mercenaries. Let's check it out.
Gaurav: I'm fine either ways.
Greibel: I just have one question for you, Miss Woman In Distress. Now this is important.
What kind of cakes?
Distraught woman: Er... well... tea cakes, mostly.
Greibel: I could really go for some Jaffas
Gaurav: I had to look "tea cakes" up, and realise that they're defined differently in England, the US, Sweden and (India and Australia).
The Wikipedia article helpfully adds, "Tea refers to the popular beverage which these baked goods are an accompaniment to."
Ganelon: ...Wow, really?
I had no idea.
Gaurav: Jaffa cakes!!! YES
if we're going, let's go
Bear Soup Guy: Some day I'll get to try some Jaffa Cakes :(
And yes, let's
Gaurav: they're not as good as Tim-Tams though.
Distraught woman: So you'll come?
Gaurav: BSG: the Beeb has a recipe: http://www.bbc.co.uk/food/recipes/homemadejaffacakes_91480
Bear Soup Guy: :O
this is totally doable
I don't have any of the ingredients but I will get them
Radek: Yes. Hurry up.
Greibel: Off we go to Scary Town!
Frezak (GM): Ask for up-front payment
Since she intends for us to get killed.
That or we just go take her to the police.
Are there guards in this town?
Distraught woman: Follow me. Hurry.
Apheori (GM): She leads you down some dark alleys. There aren't any that are readily distinguishable as guards, but that may or may not mean anything.
Gaurav: A secret police?
Apheori (GM) shrugs.
Apheori (GM): The house is a house. It looks like something out of a bad painting, with really bad tiling on all the surfaces.
Frezak (GM): Someone detect magic
and brb
Ganelon: Sure thing.
rolling 1d20+12 Arcana
(
5
)
+12
=
17
Apheori (GM): The woman knocks, gets no response, and then unlocks the door herself. It takes a few tries.
Gaurav: Are there neighbouring houses? Or is it off by itself?
Ellemerr: Does she have a key?
Apheori (GM): You discern that the tiling is a really bad illusion.
She has a key, but it may not be the right one, hence the tries. Except ti does wind up working after a bit.
Radek: Keep an eye on her, Gravy.
Rhu stands well back from the house
Radek: She might try to run.
Gaurav: Any idea what the tiling is hiding? Is it on the walls of the house? Can we try touching it?
Apheori (GM): It's on the walls, windowframes, walkway, roof, etc.
You can totally touch it.
So she unlocks the door. Then she turns back and suggests that you leave the robot outside.
Radek: Why, is it liable to be eaten?
Distraught woman: It might wreck the floors.
Have it look after your sleeping friend.
Ganelon: If only the Mouseforged were so reliable.
Apheori (GM): Heh.
Ganelon: I'll touch the shingles, though.
What's up with them?
Apheori (GM): Bad decor, apparently. They feel a bit slimy, probably applied in a hurry and for cheap.
Frezak (GM): Gan, I should get the Mark Of Finding.
Gaurav: Ha, that's a fun idea: buy a crappy house, illusion up a decent facade, sell it to someone with poor detect magic.
Bloody-slimy?
Apheori (GM): No.
Ganelon: Well, it would probably get on my hands if so.
Radek: Is this house even yours?
Ellemerr: Her gran's, she said.
Distraught woman: It's my gran's. She's probably in bed. Come on, please.
Gaurav: Can we send the eyebot in to investigate? Or would that be rude?
Ganelon: Would Radek *care*?
Frezak (GM): If you send it out now, will it still be around to fight?
Ganelon: Five minutes would be what the rules say.
Apheori (GM): You totally can, but you may need to explain what you're doing.
Radek: Not so fast.
I'm sending a camera in, first.
Frezak (GM): I'm ready to grab/tackle her if she runs.
Apheori (GM): She looks confused, but nods.
Ganelon: Then I'll power up the eyebot.
Distraught woman: Basement. Not the upstairs.
Radek: I can give it directions from here.
Gaurav: We could save it up. Send Greibel in as a fly or something.
Ganelon: But then he's in danger.
Distraught woman: Would Radek care?
Ganelon: Touche.
Apheori (GM): Dammit, ooc.
Ganelon: Still, this is a nice chance to show off.
Bear Soup Guy: And Greibel would care o_o
Apheori (GM): Yay, Greibel!
Good. >.>
So you power it up and send it in and everyone else is really bored?
Gaurav: Can't we watch the screen over Gan's shoulder? Unless there isn't a screen.
Ganelon: He's got a computer.
Apheori (GM): Okay, you all crane over his shoulder and annoy the hell out of him?
Niiice.
Frezak (GM): nope, i got my eyes on the woman.
Rhu -- still keeping well away from the house -- does a religion check to see if all this rings any sort of religious bell
Ganelon: Let's hear about the interior, then.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+9 religion check
(
4
)
+9
=
13
Apheori (GM): Rhu: Nope.
Gan: I'll get back to you on that in a moment, sorry.
BATHROOM NEED AAAAGH.
Ganelon: Sure thing.
Gaurav: Mysterious women luring travellers to houses with slimy walls, I mean. Like, if this house had chicken legs, we'd all know where we were.
Frezak (GM): I'm fully expecting her to be a hag.
Gaurav: She might have a hag-king in the basement.
Ellemerr: Hags don't have kings.
Frezak (GM): It's a bunch of hags with their tales tied together.
Bear Soup Guy: Like a Portugese Man O' War
You could call it a Hag O' War
Apheori (GM): Sag'o'war.
Or something.
The inside of the house is housey. Sending the eyebot in, you see an entryway that has a bit of mud on the floor, too many coats on the rack, and some old shoes.
From there, there's a kitchen which looks pretty standard.
Frezak (GM): Many?
Apheori (GM): There are some halls leading out, and stairs up and down.
Many?
Ganelon: Well, no sense in checking the upstairs first.
Gaurav: How far away is the closest neighbour's house? It might be worth asking about the habits of people living here.
people/things
Apheori (GM): The buildings are right up next to each other, but it looks like the ones next to it aren't even houses.
Ganelon: For the moment, I'd rather just see if the woman looks uncomfortable about us sending a 'bot in.
Apheori (GM): She mostly just looks worried.
And... yes, a bit uncomfortable, now that you mention it.
Frezak (GM): That her monstrous child is not yet sated.
Gaurav: Does she look ... hungry?
Frezak (GM): We could just pin her and extract info.
Apheori (GM): Not that you can tell.
Gaurav: Maybe after we've eyebotted the house?
Ganelon: You people ask some weird questions.
Downstairs!
Apheori (GM): You send the eyebot down the stairs... can it open doors/
?
Ganelon: No, but it does have a laser.
Radek: I can repair any damage caused in as little as ten minutes.
Apheori (GM): The door at the bottom is shut.
Do you laser it open?
Ganelon: Yes.
Distraught woman: Hey! what are you doing?
Apheori (GM): She was apparently looking over your shoulder.
Radek: What did I just tell you?
Distraught woman subsides, but looks at Radek suspiciously.
Rhu: What is your name, distraught woman?
Apheori (GM): Through the door you come to basement. It's fairly unfinished, lots of stone and stuff, and full of random junk and boxes.
You navigate through the maze of boxes...
Distraught woman: Telrin.
Apheori (GM): So you navigate the maze of boxes and junk, getting deeper and deeper into the morass of basement.
I assume the eyebot can emit light, or pick up other frequencies?
Ganelon: Can or can't?
Because it can definitely emit light.
It shoots a bloody laser.
Apheori (GM): Good point.
Ganelon: Other features are largely up to you, actually.
Since you're the DM.
Apheori (GM): It's very dark. There are splots of stuff on the ground - the same stuff Gravy noticed on the woman - and becoming more frequent the further you go, until everything is covered in it...
Ganelon: How unsanitary.
Apheori (GM): Then it turns another corner and you see it, the monster itself.
"That's it," the woman says, pointing.
It looks like a small raccoon covered in black oil.
Ganelon: ...Oh gods, is it the filth?
Apheori (GM): No, there's a small raccoon in the filth!
Gaurav: does it have creepy raccoon hands?
Apheori (GM): Sure, why not. I dunno.
Ganelon: Frezak knows what filth I'm talking about.
I could also mention glistening oil, but that's something else.
As it turns out, black oily substances in fiction tend to be really bad news.
Ellemerr: If it was the filth... that'd be bad.
Gaurav: We have a black shiny dagger ...
Frezak (GM): If it's the Filth, we should just leave.
Gaurav: maybe they'll be friends
Radek: Looks like a raccoon.
Covered in... something. I don't suppose you know what?
Rhu: If it is a small wild animal, Greibel might be able to try to converse with it. He can talk to bees.
Telrin: It's a monster. It ate the pest control. It ate my uncle. It ate a sphinx.
Whatever it is, it's horrible.
Horrible.
Can you kill it? Please.
Radek: Well, let's see.
Frezak (GM): ... nature?
Ganelon: If anyone watching wants to, I'll wait.
Frezak (GM): Miss GM?
Telrin: What do you mean?
Apheori (GM): Dammit.
I hate this interface.
What do you mean, nature?
Frezak (GM): Can I roll Nature to try and determine what the raccoonoid thing is?
Apheori (GM): Of course.
Frezak (GM): And/or the gloop.
rolling 1D20+10
(
8
)
+10
=
18
Apheori (GM): You can roll whatever you want for whatever. Doesn't mean it'll work, but that's another matter.
It ain't a proper raccoon. Some sort of magic or deformity.
Also the black oily stuff there looks like... oil.
Rhu: Is there anything or anyone else down there in the basement?
Gaurav: None of this explains Telrin hiding something from us.
Ganelon: Well, one surefire way to tell if it's oil.
Telrin: Just... old things. Nothing important.
Frezak (GM): Oh gods.
Ganelon: Heh heh heh.
Yesssss
I shoot the monster with the laser.
Frezak (GM): I wish I was playing a tiefling.
Ganelon: (It does like 5 damage)
Apheori (GM): Whyso?
Ganelon: Oh, they have fire resistance.
Apheori (GM): It all catches fire.
Ganelon: Naturally.
Apheori (GM): FLAMES EVERYWHERE.
The eyebot is destroyed.
Ganelon: It caused an explosion?
Apheori (GM): Telrin freaks out and runs inside.
It caused fire. Lots of fire.
Radek: Are you really sure you should be running *towards* the fire?
Ganelon: I'm kind of a jerk, aren't I?
Gaurav: we could grab her to stop her going in, but her grandma's probably in there
you're a mad scientist. this is what you do.
Radek: ...
We should probably head in, too.
Gaurav: im not certain there is still an "in" to go into
Apheori (GM): The basement is on fire; the rest is still fine.
For now.
Gaurav: I guess we're about to find out if this city has a town guard.
Ganelon: Radek actually does have a limited ability to put out fires.
Apheori (GM): Smoke is starting to come out.
Ganelon: I doubt it's enough for this, but he can do... cold stuff.
Gaurav: what are the Dreamers doing?
Apheori (GM): Amadi is still asleep (for now), and Dave is hoping someone else will do something.
Gaurav: ooh, good idea
Gaurav mutters "ye gods ..." and utters a prayer to Hazz'ridan.
Amadi snuggles up on Gravy (as well as can be done, depending on how she's being carried) and mutters something about beef.
Rhu mutters "ye gods ..." and utters a prayer to Hazz'ridan.
Gaurav: that should do it
Greibel: This...could gave gone smoother
Radek: Well, once the fires go out, anything magical inside should likely still be intact... if buried.
I could break them down and use the base components to reconstruct the building.
Or we could flee and hope she cannot describe us well to any authorities.
Dave: Can't you... maybe put out the fire?
Radek shrugs.
Radek: I could try.
Apheori (GM): Does D&D have any rules for fire putting outing?
Ganelon: Not to my knowledge.
Rhu: we're adventurers, not firefighters
Radek: If the heat concerns you, don't worry.
I have something for that. Enough for two of us.
Dave: Great.
Dave tries to push Radek in ahead of her.
Rhu looks around, sighs, and says, "I'll go".
Radek: Wonderful. Here.
Radek tosses Rhu a syringe.
Dave: Okay.
Ganelon: My infusions can do one of two things.
Rhu syringes himself.
Dave grabs Rhu instead and drags him in.
Ganelon: One is heal people.
Rhu: Wha---
Ganelon: The other is make them resistant to an element of my choosing (with some restrictions, but fire is on the list).
So you have resist 5 fire for this endeavor.
And you can end that effect to gain fire immunity for a turn (6 seconds).
Gaurav: nice!
Apheori (GM): What about smoke inhalation?
Radek: Try not to suffocate!
Apheori (GM): Does it do anything to keep him... yeah.
XD
Ganelon: I can't be expected to have a solution to EVERY problem, can I?
Gaurav: can Greibel turn into anything fire resistant?
who wants the other syringe thing?
Ganelon: You know who would really help here?
The Mouseforged.
I can't give it a pep-talk, though.
Apheori (GM): Well, Dave has now dragged Rhu into the kitchen, unless he was significantly resisting.
Gaurav: he was too confused to resist
Rhu: Huh
Damn
Frezak (GM): All heroes can hold their breath for at least 3 minutes.
Rhu: TELRIN! WHERE ARE YOU?
Apheori (GM): Lots of smoke is coming up the stairs, it's getting warm, and there is an infernal glow down there.
Rhu coughs in the smoke
Rhu: Yeah, no. Let's check this floor quickly, then head up.
Apheori (GM): Dave runs down the stairs and drags Rhu with her unless he resists.
He resists?
Rhu watches Dave run downstairs, sighs, and follows
Frezak (GM): So do you want help making a new character when Rhu is turned to ash?
Apheori (GM) cackles.
Gaurav: nah it's cool
ill adventure in the infernal planes for a bit and reapear as a ghost
Apheori (GM): No, really, it's quite warm. Very much so. Even with the infusion it's horribly uncomfortable, you can hardly see, and you feel very light-headed.
Frezak (GM): Melllltinnnng
Apheori (GM): Are the rest of you going to get the mouseforged to... do stuff?
Rhu tugs at Dave and points up the stairs
Frezak (GM): I wouldn't know how.
Apheori (GM): You have a Greibel.
Ganelon: I'll try, but I mean... it doesn't speak Radek.
Radek: Mouseforged! It is time to face your fears.
Specifically your fear of fire, which has been rendered irrational by your new body.
Apheori (GM): Dave swats Rhu off and runs into the flames, then runs back, grabs Rhu, and then starts pulling him again.
Frezak (GM): His new body has no more fire resistance than you.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: It feels less hot now, though.
Ganelon: It doesn't breathe.
I can give it an infusion.
...Somehow.
Apheori (GM): Rhu does need to breathe and is probably going to pass out very soon.
Frezak (GM): Warforged have fluids.
Gaurav: Rhu lets himself be pulled along by Dave. His head -- or at least the bits that don't hurt -- is just one continuous prayer to Hazz' now.
Frezak (GM): I could collapse the building on itself.
Well, bits of it.
Gaurav: I have three minutes. My speed is 7 squares, which is how fast I can travel in six seconds (one round in an encounter). So I should be moving pretty quickly.
Apheori (GM): So Dave pulls Rhu to the raccoon, yells, "LOOK! BADGER!", and then he passes out.
He can un-pass out if he rolls well.
Frezak (GM): How big IS this house?
Gaurav: C'mon, +3 constitution, this is your chance to shine
Apheori (GM): The house? Normal. The basement? A lot bigger than it should be.
Frezak (GM): Well... if you're unconcious...
There's not much you can do.
Ganelon: Not that I can see, but..
Apheori (GM): Just roll.
Ganelon: Is the raccoon really alive?
Gaurav: I haven't spent any action points at all so far. Can I use any of them for a second wind or something?
rolling d20
(
19
)
=
19
Apheori (GM): It's on fire.
Gaurav: +1 constitution +2 half level if any of that applies.
Apheori (GM): Rhu wakes up!
Gaurav: I'm pretty sure "set everything on fire" would be the first thing the exterminator would have tried when s/he was the racoon, and we know they lost to it
Apheori (GM): Dave has a raccoon in her arms. It's on fire. Everything is on fire except you and Dave.
Rhu opens his eyes wide, gasping desperately for breath.
Apheori (GM): Well, no, that's not right. You and Dave are on fire too. It just doesn't seem to be hurting either of you.
Ganelon: Well I dunno what Dave's excuse is.
Rhu grabs Dave's arm and tries pulling her upstairs.
Ganelon: But I guess the Mouseforged isn't looking too motivated, right?
Rhu: 5 resistance means I should be getting -5 less damage than the fire would otherwise do, right? or does it affect the ... attack roll, if such things apply?
Gaurav: ack, ooc
Ganelon: No, it's purely damage.
Gaurav: I need ice cream.
Ganelon: So heat of a given intensity is just... negated.
Apheori (GM): I need ice cream.
Ganelon: And everything else is brought down as well.
Amadi mutters in her sleep, "I need ice cream."
Ganelon: This infusion wouldn't protect you much if someone set off thermite on your chest, for instance.
Dave suddenly starts screaming, FIRE! FIRE! AAAGH FIRE!
Gaurav: ... I now have ice cream. o.0
Apheori (GM): The mouseforged looks vaguely interested, but is mostly watching greibel.
Gaurav: oh god, please don't give the DM ideas
one of these boxes probably contain thermite
Apheori (GM): Shush, you.
Gaurav: How do I yank Dave up the stairs?
Apheori (GM): By grabbing her.
Gaurav:
rolling 1d20+2 (+0 STR +2 half level) vs reflex to grab Dave
(
9
)
+2
=
11
Apheori (GM): You fail to grab her, but at least manage to get her attention.
Rhu urgently points upwards
Dave: What? Rhu? What are you...
Er...
Dave looks at the ceiling.
Dave looks at the fire.
Rhu shakes his head
Dave looks at Rhu.
Rhu points up the stairs vehemently
Dave: There is... something I should be doing here, isn't there?
Rhu: ... run ...
Dave: No, no, not that.
Ganelon: I wonder if Rhu's starting to regret certain decisions that may have led him to this point.
Gaurav: Is Rhu strong enough to try another grab? Im' sort of imagining him on the floor gasping at this point.
hehe
he can leave
he could crawl upstairs
but he can't
god's orders
Apheori (GM): He's pretty weak. Let's say can't really stand.
Ganelon: Becoming an Avenger may be one such decision.
Gaurav: haha truth
Frezak (GM): There's an item that's literally a bag of fresh air.
Apheori (GM): If he falls over, that could be a nice dramatic thing to do.
Ganelon: Magic item?
Frezak (GM): Delvers Pouch, I think.
Ganelon: IF ONLY I HAD DUST
Rhu points up the stairs, then falls over
Rhu mutters "... go ..."
Frezak (GM): Deefarer's Pouch.
Oh, it's uncommon.
I don't think you can make those.
Ganelon: I can't?
(To Ellemerr): so it occurs to me that there's this skill/ability of Dave/Amadi's real race that involves being basically immune to the effects of heat/cold and being able to control temperature and such... but I'm not sure how likely it is that Dave figures that out and just puts out the fire and absorbs all its energy.
Ganelon: It just says "turn it into a magic item".
No mention of rarity.
(From Amadi): Do you want me in there?
(To Ellemerr): Also I think some people would be very cross with me as DM.
Gaurav: Not that I'm not enjoying dying dramatically, but doesn't Radek have one more fire resistance syringe?
(To Ellemerr): Or would they be?
(To Amadi): You could totally go in, but I have no idea how that would... well... it could certainly be interesting.
Ganelon: Yes.
(To Ellemerr): Actually, that might go over better anyway.
(To Ellemerr): If Amadi does it.
Ganelon: So if Dave leaves you to die, we can still jump in to help.
(To Ellemerr): I can see it now: "I ate the fire. It was nice and smoky."
Amadi opens one of her eyes and looks around. She doesn't seem entirely pleased by this.
Amadi: When are we? Why are we now? And... where's Dawn?
Dave just stands there looking confused for a moment, then does some magickiness on Rhu to fix the symptoms of having no air. It doesn't actually solve the problem, though, and they come back almost immediately.
Dave: Agh, crap.
Gaurav: Is Rhu unconscious yet?
Apheori (GM): Nope. And he just got better. And then got worse again, but he's still slightly clearer than he was.
I imagine there's choking involved.
Frezak (GM): And we're just... sitting outside.
Gaurav tries to crawl towards the staircase
Frezak (GM): So it's been more than three minutes?
Ganelon: Well, if anyone wants to volunteer.
Amadi opens her other eye.
Amadi: Is there fire?
Rhu tries to crawl towards the staircase.
Frezak (GM): I'll point Amadi at the flaaaames
Apheori (GM): Flames are now coming out the door.
Amadi: ... Huh.
Apheori (GM): Well, doorway. The door is still open.
Amadi: Will you put me down, please?
Apheori (GM): Then Telrin runs out holding a dessicated corpse, curses you all vehemently, and wishes painful things upon your intestines.
Frezak (GM): I will carefully lower the midget.
Apheori (GM): She runs off down the street.
Frezak (GM): Huh.
Do we want me to oppie her?
Apheori (GM): Some passerby are also running up to watch the burning building because neat! Fire!
Amadi looks after the corpse-bearing woman for a moment, then shrugs and walks into the house.
Ganelon: Well.
Bear Soup Guy: Can I turn into a yeti or something and just go down and yank them up?
Ganelon: That doesn't sound like it's our fault.
The fire, sure.
Gaurav: Ah, I thought Amadi ran down the street. This is better.
Ganelon: But we didn't kill no-one's granny.
Frezak (GM): You probably don't want to turn into a thing covered in fur, BSG
Gaurav: could wet the fur
Rhu tries to stand up
Bear Soup Guy: kinky
Apheori (GM): Amadi: Where do you go, inside?
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+2 strength check
(
8
)
+2
=
10
Amadi yells for Dawn while wandering randomly forwards.
Apheori (GM): Rhu falls over.
Frezak (GM): I still have some booze.
Radek: She's downstairs!
Amadi looks for a downstairs.
Dave: Oh gods, you need to breathe, don't you? Living people need to breathe and you can't breathe, you can't breathe, you can't...
Uh.
Frezak (GM): Do our anti-laser cloaks protect us from fire?
Dave pulls a mask out of her pocket and stuffs it onto Rhu.
Ganelon: What kind of mask?
Ellemerr: I hope it's italian.
Frezak (GM): It's the mask from that cowardly dog thing.
Apheori (GM): The black one from before. Or the same model.
Frezak (GM): Big tribal thingie
Apheori (GM): Since I think Amadi actually still has that.
It does that weird black thing and Rhu goes all black-covered and he can breathe again.
Frezak (GM): Oh.
Is Rhu undead?
Rhu lies there, taking deep breaths.
Apheori (GM): Not yet.
Frezak (GM): great
Apheori (GM): Amadi: You run downstairs into a horrible inferno of flame and smoke. It feels quite lovely, but threatens to ruin your dress unless you pay careful attention.
Gaurav: Can avengers be undeaded? You'd think they'd have talismans or curses to stop that from happening, what with their no-undead obsessions.
Frezak (GM): Well.
3.5 Doombringers have a power to ensure that they rise as undead.
Ganelon: Revenant Avengers of the Raven Queen sound like they'd almost be the norm.
Ellemerr: I shall be very careful with my dress. Do I see the others?
Apheori (GM): You enter the maze of burning boxes. You also see some shiny things in them, which you may or may not pocket.
Rhu tries to stand up, which probably should be easy now that I can breathe again?
Ganelon: Pocket them!
Ellemerr: Shiny things!
Ganelon: Pocket them like a magpie!
Apheori (GM): It takes a bit to stand up. You're still pretty weak.
Dave helps you, though.
Gaurav: Magpies don't have pockets.
Frezak (GM): GO DRAGON GOOOOO
Amadi is distracted by shiny things. She pockets as many as she can, while still calling out for Dawn.
Dave hears her and calls back.
Ganelon: Magpies almost definitely wish they had pockets.
Rhu looks around, confused. Then he notices Dave, and begins to tug on her and point up the stairs again.
Frezak (GM): Amadi stumbles about, smearing chocolate coins all over her face :p
Dave also goes to pocket some things, realises her dress and the thing she thinks is a badger are on fire, and puts them out.
Amadi: (still yelling and stuffing her pockets) Dawn, are you here for a reason?
Apheori (GM): Amadi: You reach Dave and Rhu. Dave's dress is a bit singed, and she's holding a somewhat odd-looking raccoon. Rhu looks frantic.
Dave: Er... yes!
Gaurav: Rhu would make a great Revenant Avengers of the Raven Queen
Dave: Fire!
I'm just not sure what to do with it.
Amadi gives Rhu a "I did not think I'd find you here because it's a really stupid place for you to be" look.
Rhu sees Amadi and gives her a "what-the-FUCK-are-YOU-doing-here" look.
Gaurav: I swear I typed that out before I saw your message.
Clearly Rhu's keep-these-two-alive duties are harder than even he imagined.
Amadi: Dawn, did you bring the holy man?
Dave: Er... I might have?
Dave looks slightly embarrassed.
Frezak (GM): HOLY?
WAIT.
THIS IS ALL HIS FAULT.
Kill Rhu, and the holes are fixed!
Dave: I remembered the mask, though!
Frezak (GM): BURN HIM
WITCH
WITCH
WITCH
Amadi gives Dave a look like she's really stupid.
Frezak (GM) chants
Amadi: Well, that's good. Masks are good.
Let's get him out of here, now.
Radek: So, if I may make an observation?
The Gravedigger: Yup?
Dave gives Amadi a look like she knows, and is sorry.
Dave: We can do that later. Fire first.
Radek: The woman who hired us may have been speaking to her grandmother's corpse.
The Gravedigger: Yep.
Radek: Which would explain why an animal was attempting to eat it.
The Gravedigger: Yep.
Gaurav: Kill the 'venger, kill the 'venger, kill the 'venger, kill the 'venger, yo ho ho
Radek: Do you think she had anything she promised us?
Gaurav: Wait, didn't Amadi have the mask last?
Not that I'm complaining
The Gravedigger: Nope.
Apheori (GM): Gaurav: Yes.
Amadi: Fire first? Are you sure? I mean... he is really bad with fire. And I'm not sure he deals well with cold, either, and I'm not sure how this will even work, now that...
Amadi shrugs.
Dave: He's fine. The mask will protect him.
It's what we made them for. Isn't it?
When dragging along the priests of other gods. Always give them a mask.
It's rule number cake.
Or possibly cheese.
I feel funny.
Gaurav: The cake is a lie.
Amadi: Oh.
You're right.
Fire, then.
Radek: I'll run a scan on the place before we leave, just to be sure.
Rhu stands around and watches Amadi and Dave converse. Something about their calmness -- and his apparently unlimited supply of air -- is calming him down, and besides, he doesn't think he could grab and pull them *both* outside
Radek: But, ah... sorry.
The Gravedigger: You could do it now, while we wait for the crazier people to get back.
Radek: I will admit this was not the wisest decision I've ever made.
Amadi wades into the flames, being very, very careful with her dress. Then she opens her mouth wide.
The Gravedigger: Eh.
I'm not really surprised.
Apheori (GM): The flames suddenly pull off of everything else and pour inter her mouth in a river of molten air. The place goes cold. And then it goes colder.
The Gravedigger: Oh, hey.
Summat's 'appenin'.
Apheori (GM): Then it's all just black and charred stuff. No fire. No excess heat. A fair bit of smoke, now drifting out.
The Gravedigger: Quick, scan now!
Ganelon: Yep.
The Gravedigger: I'll go look for Rhu and the midgets.
Ganelon: I will do a detect magic again.
Dave: I meant to do that.
I did. Really.
Ganelon: For the presence of magical doodads.
Amadi burps, and giggles embarrassed.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+12
(
18
)
+12
=
30
Frezak (GM): I'll go clomp down in search of crazy people.
Rhu touches one of the boxes to make sure the fire is really out
Rhu: How ... did you do ... that?
Amadi starts looking around for more shiny stuff.
Amadi: Hm? It was tasty.
Dave: Gan! You find that... there is some stuff, especially in the basement! Also there's some other things. Magic people. In the basement. Yes. Magic.
Apheori (GM): Er, ooc.
Dave: She took the heat.
For her own.
I think.
Dave starts going through some of the boxes too, still holding the raccoon.
Rhu: Is that safe?
Is *that* safe? (points at the raccoon)
The Gravedigger: HELLOOOOOO?
SHARD PEOPLE?
RHU?
Ganelon: Alright!
I rush down there, too.
Amadi: Safe? Of course not. But neither is chocolate.
Dave: What?
Amadi: HELLOOOO MR TALL GUY!
Rhu: DOWN HERE!
Rhu tries to take his mask off
Gaurav: Can he feel the blackness from the mask all over his body, or does he think it's a breathing apparatus type thing?
The Gravedigger clomps down the stairs.
The Gravedigger: Hey guys. Everyone all right? Comparatively?
Uh. Rhu.
Not be racist, here.
Gaurav: YES! Mrs. Teatime ate the flames, and Dave has the raccoon-monster.
Apheori (GM): He can probably feel it, but it is mostly just acting as breathing. Now it's not really doing anything, so yeah.
Anyway, it comes off on demand.
The Gravedigger: You look a little.... darker than earlier.
Is that soot?
Amadi runs over to Gravy, dancing around him like a christmas tree. "I ate the fire! It was smokey and warm!"
Apheori (GM): And all the blackness goes away, aside from the soot, which is considerably.
e
Rhu takes the mask off and hands it back to Dave
Apheori (GM): Amadi:
Rhu: (to Dave) You saved my life. Thank you.
The Gravedigger pats Amadi.
The Gravedigger: Good job, kid.
Dave stuffs the mask into her pocket with some other odds and ends.
Amadi looks incredibly pleased with herself, practically beaming at the praise.
The Gravedigger: Is that raccoonthingbeast dead?
Dave then stares at Rhu like he's out of his mind for a moment, then tries toput on a normal expression, botches it, and goes back to goingthrough boxes.
Dave checks the raccoon.
Dave: Badger's fine.
Radek: Well, if it was a normal raccoon, it definitely should be.
The Gravedigger: Hey Radek.
Dave: I mean, it was dead, but... it's fine now.
The Gravedigger: Why is not dead?
Dave: I fixed it!
The Gravedigger: Oh dear.
Is it alive now? Or undead?
Dave: Also look! I found a magic spatula! Teleoth would be so proud.
Dave hands it to Gravy.
The Gravedigger: You sure you shouldn't keep it?
Maybe it's a sign or something.
Dave: I have other things.
Including a sign.
The Gravedigger: Um.
OKay.
Rhu: (to Dave) What's your sign?
Radek: Let me see that. And...
Dave pulls a streetsign out of her pocket with a small grin.
Ellemerr: Magic spatula? :o Did I find anything nifty?
Ganelon: Alright, where's the magic stuff!?
Gaurav: Which street?
(To Ellemerr): Whatever you feel like.
Frezak (GM): Yeah, I automatically pass it to Radek.
Ganelon: I'll dig through ashes for it!
Frezak (GM): DID SOMEONE SAY DIG?
Ganelon: But probably not Amadi's pockets.
Apheori (GM): Gan: Apparently Amadi and Dave pocketed most of it already. There's also some left in other boxes and soot. Do I need to come up with specifics?
Amadi starts taking the things out of her pockets. It turns out to be mostly spoons, with the occasional spork. Some of them are singing.
Ganelon: Nope.
Because unless it's useful to us as adventurers, it's becoming DUSSSST
Gaurav: Are they singing the same song or different songs?
Ellemerr: They're harmonizing, of course.
Radek: Singing cutlery?
Dave hands Radek a heap of random junk, about half of which is magic. Some of the more interesting ones include an enchanted trowel, a bunch of string that seems to be tying itself into knots entirely on its own, a pair of busted headphones, a large chunk of solid uranium, and a giant ornamental key.
Ganelon: ...Solid uranium!
Gaurav: Key!
Radek: Hah! The crazy woman was good on her word, after all.
Here, watch this.
Apheori (GM): She also tries to hand you the raccoon before realising it's not one of the objects, at which point she changes her mind.
Amadi: Singing cutlery! I have other things, too. I think.
Ganelon: With but a touch of the finger (and ten minutes of ritual preparation), they are reduced!
TO DUST!
Well, unless Gravy wants the trowel.
But I could just make one of his own shovels magical.
Gaurav: We should keep the key. It might open a door.
Ganelon: I don't think it's magical.
Nor the uranium.
Apheori (GM): Those ain't, indeed.
Well, the uranium might be, depending on your definiton of magical.
...you might want to do something with it to avoid radiation poisoning.
Isn't that radioactive?
Amadi keeps digging through her pockets, and produces a full tea set, filled with something that is probably not tea, a tiny teddy-bear, a couple of really horribly coloured towels, a toy mouse, and a piece of cake, which she decides not to hand over and starts eating.
Ganelon: It is.
Apheori (GM): Yeah.
Frezak (GM): Depends on what kind of uranium.
Apheori (GM): Okay, this one is!
Also it's really heavy.
Frezak (GM): I don't need the trowel.
Ganelon: Alright then.
Give me a numerical value for how much magic dust all this junk gets me.
Noting that...
Gaurav: Has somebody added "giant ornamental key" to their inventory?
Frezak (GM): Not yet.
you want it?
Ganelon: A level 4 magic item costs 840 and I currently possess 399.
Apheori (GM): The junk Amadi and Dave gave you nets to be worth about 2301g +/- the resulting stains in your clothes.
Gaurav: I don't want it, but I'll keep it so we don't lose it.
Ganelon: Fantastic.
Frezak (GM): Nice. We can at least get some +1 base gear.
Ganelon: Totes.
I don't think I have anything on-hand to protect us from radiation poisoning.
Maybe we could just give it to Amadi?
Apheori (GM): Dave will try to give the uranium to Amadi.
Frezak (GM): We don't have a Bag Of HOlding, do we?
Apheori (GM): Weeeell...
Amadi: What do I-?
Amadi takes the uranium, looking very puzzled.
Dave hands Gan a box of holding.
Dave: *Radek
Radek: ...Oh.
Dave: Careful. It's full of lizards.
Radek: Oh my.
Frezak (GM): Actually, depending on how our anti-laser cloaks are made, they might be able to contain the waves.
Dave: A lot of lizards.
Very unhappy lizards.
Radek peers inside the box.
Apheori (GM): A dragon snout tries to come out and gets jammed in the opening for a bit.
Frezak (GM): So if we're in a tight spot, open the box and run.
Apheori (GM): It snorts a small amount of fire, then manages to pull back inside.
Radek: ...One of you two should hold onto the uranium until I find a way to deal with these.
Unless we want it to kill the lizards...?
Gaurav: Party pets: sentient porridge, sphinx, mouseforged, bag of holding holding dragons.
Frezak (GM): Would the lasercloaks help?
Ganelon: Good question.
Apheori (GM): Yeah, they should block that radiation.
I think it's similar enough, anyway.
Ganelon: Eh, it's the future.
Frezak (GM): You want me to hold onto that?
Apheori (GM): Gaurav: Dave also has a raccoon she brought back to life and is convinced is a badger.
Ganelon: Lasers come in different frequencies. Usually gamma or X-rays.
And uranium emits gamma radiation, if unfocused... I think.
Frezak (GM): gamma radiation is blocked by paper.
Ganelon: So sure, wrap it in some lasercloak.
Gaurav: I dub it Badger the Raccoon
Apheori (GM): Future lasers are stronger.
Frezak (GM): it's the alpha and beta radiation that fucks you up.
Apheori (GM): Or something.
Ganelon: It's been a while.
But yeah, you take that.
And Rhu is welcome to have the huge key if he wants it.
Rhu takes the ornamental key and happily puts it into his backpack
Frezak (GM): Maybe Radek will be able to make a small reactor to power Car, if we can ever get back there.
Ganelon: If it even needs power.
Another bomb is also possible, of course.
Apheori (GM): Heh heh.
Frezak (GM): I thought it did, but we didn't know how much.
Ganelon: Well, that's what I mean.
Frezak (GM): But, right now, if we hall all the stuff, we should leave.
Ganelon: Obviously it's powered, but does it need power right now? Who knows.
Yeah, let's escape and not get arrested.
Frezak (GM): Both those things sound great.
Rhu: Did we ever figure out what the oily substance was?
Frezak (GM): Oil!
Radek: It was flammable, and therefore likely oil.
(To Ellemerr): The fun thing here is they don't even know if the items we gave them were found in the basement or not. We could have given them DIFFERENT ones.
(From Amadi): These pockets are great pockets.
Radek: Let's get out of here before we get accused of anything.
(To Amadi): Pockets of holding, methinks.
Rhu: Sure.
Dave: We were going somewhere, weren't we?
Let's go there.
Amadi runs back up to Gravy and asks for a ride.
Frezak (GM): I will add an Amadi to my invetory.
Rhu follows Dave
Ellemerr: She will squee and make other girly sounds.
Ganelon: This was a good day for Radek.
Apheori (GM): Dave marches out. I assume y'all follow.
Outside is a worried crowd; Dave assures them that everything is handled and under control and they can now go back about their business. She sounds very official.
Ganelon: He got "paid" for solving someone's pest problem way better than he expected to be.
Apheori (GM): A guy in a fire suit asks if she's sure, there was a really bad fire here, and she says, "Yes. Go home, Todd."
Ellemerr: Possibly recite nursery rhymes. Like
"How many miles to Babylon?
Three score and ten.
Can I get there on Gravy-back?
Yes, and back again.
If you stay steady and keep to the track,
Ellemerr: You may get there on Gravy-back."
Frezak (GM): PLease don't set fire to my horns.
Ellemerr: ... That's a great idea!
Apheori (GM): She has a lot of fire in her now. Be careful.
Anyway, let's call it, then.
Ganelon: She's all fired up.
Apheori (GM): END OF SESSION.
Frezak (GM): Really?
Apheori (GM) sprays everyone with fungicide.
Gaurav coughs
Ellemerr: What? I don't even have to sleep yet!
Frezak (GM): I knew it! Rave is a fungus.
Ganelon: As they stroll off into the sunset, Radek poses the question:
"So, who wants to hear a story about the last time this happened to me?"
Apheori (GM): I need lunch! Food! Time to write stuff!
...I need to do all the things I didn't do last week. >.<
Gaurav: Gan: Shh, not too loud! The sphinxes will hear you.
Ellemerr: Oh.
That sounds vaguely familiar.
Ganelon 's eyes go wide in fear.
Frezak (GM): HMMMMM
You liar, Gan.
You don't know fear.
Ganelon: Well...
Fine.
Gaurav: Were you seriously asking? Can you tell us before you go? Or at the start of the next session?
Ganelon: Me?
Gaurav: Yes.
Apheori: when do your holidays start?
Apheori (GM): This coming weekend.
Ganelon: Ah, I don't actually have a story planned out for the last time Radek started a fire in someone's basement and then looted it.
And I am not the best at improv.
Frezak (GM): Boooo
Apheori (GM): Maybe you can tell the story next week.
Gaurav: oh, sorry! I thought that you was you, and you were going to regale us with tales of dungeons past.
Ganelon: No, though if you do want D&D stories, I have a couple.
Gaurav: so we can shift back to weekdays next week
potentially
Apheori (GM): Maybe. We'll see.
Weee will seeeee.
Toodles.
Apheori (GM) dives out the window.
Ellemerr: See you!
Gaurav: bye, everybody!
thanks for a fun morning!

Session 23

Apheori (GM) juggles geese.
Gaurav: I've been on since I woke up at 7:58am.
Apheori (GM): Ah, so it's lying again.
Is Frezak on too?
Ganelon: All I can say is that I don't see him.
Frezak (GM): Loading.
Someone do things.
Apheori (GM): You all are walking down some streets. It's still visually stunning or whatever, if you're into vistas and architecture and crap, and you're starting to notice more colours amidst the golden hues - shades of blue and red, and bits of green and black...
Gaurav: Wait, did we search the entire house last week?
Apheori (GM): Except for Amadi and Greibel. You two see a whole lot of other colours too, and some weird shapes of buildings that don't make much sense in terms of the other buildings. Kind of... built on top of each other.
You searched the basement and made your escape.
Terrible adventurers, I know.
Gaurav: Did the fire not attract anybody's interest? Or did we sneak out into the crowd all adventurer-y and scuttle off?
Frezak (GM): I think we heroically scuttled
Like adventurous crabs.
Bear Soup Guy: heroic tails between our heroic legs
Gaurav: We are awful. But at least we scared off the terrified woman. That has to count for something.
Apheori (GM): There was a crowd, and Dave pretended to be official-like, and the party's collective heroicness made it work.
Ellemerr: Dawn said some things to the crowd.
Gaurav: Heh. Nice.
Apheori (GM): I really should change her name here to Dawn. 'Dave' is totally inaccurate.
Bear Soup Guy: "At least we burned down that terrified woman's house and made her run away!"
Gaurav high-fives BSG
Gaurav: for ADVENTURE
Bear Soup Guy: :D
Gaurav: So is Dawn/Dave/D* leading the way again?
Ellemerr: Yes, but besides Amadi, the group is calling her Dave anyway. :P
Gaurav: I don't suppose anybody is interested in tracking down the terrified woman?
Bear Soup Guy: she made off in pretty quick order I think
Ganelon: She ran out of the place holding what I assume to have been her mother's dessicated corpse.
It's unlikely she intends to report to the authorities.
Frezak (GM): Unless casual necromancy is okay around here.
Gaurav: I'm more worried about her tracking us as ruining our world-saving biz, but mostly I just want to see what kind of stats the desiccated corpse has. I bet it's a wizard corpse.
Frezak (GM): And she could hide the corpse and claim that we're just hooligans.
Gaurav: All the suburban moms meeting up for necromancy nights
Frezak (GM): i'd rather it weren't a paralysed lich.
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Frezak (GM): "Let's have a corpse party!"
Apheori (GM): Ooo, tell me more about paralysed liches.
Bear Soup Guy: Suburban Moms. Good band name
Gaurav: I'll bring the party hats, you bring the sorcerers.
okay, so: we follow Dave?
Ellemerr: Don't ask me. I go where I'm carried.
... I am being carried, right?
Ganelon: Is she still going somewhere?
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Do you follow?
Amadi: You realise you're holding a book. As well as Gravy's horns, I mean.
Frezak (GM): Amadi is currently in my inventory, yes.
Minor action: Wield Amadi.
Ellemerr: I guess I'll read a bit, then. That's what you do when suddenly holding books. I should know.
Frezak (GM): Probably counts as Heavy Thrown 3/6 (midget)
Gaurav: HA
Apheori (GM): She's not very heavy, unless you consider her pockets.
Frezak (GM): I only consider graves.
Everything else is superfluous.
Apheori (GM): Amadi: The book is the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Planes. You wind up reading about dead gods and how miserable the universe clearly is.
Gaurav: As long as Gravy is also following Dave, Rhu follows the both of them.
Apheori (GM): Greibel gets cornered by a giant.
Frezak (GM): I've never heard of someone hitchiking onto a Spelljammer.
Bear Soup Guy: Suddenly giant
Frezak (GM): RANDOM ENCOUNTER
Apheori (GM): Suddenly giant. IT
Frezak (GM): USE YOUR DAILIES
Ganelon: I feel like you'd see a giant coming.
Gaurav: Maybe they're like elephants. Elephants are ridiculously quiet.
Apheori (GM): It's not actually all that giant, just ten feet tall or whatever, but it's very wide and waves its arms at Greibel insistently.
Greibel: Oh...hello
Greibel waves slightly
Giant: GLORB NORB SHORG TORK.
HORG NURG.
Giant gestures at Greibel.
Greibel: Mmm, Hork Dork Dork indeed.
You mind if I just...?
Greibel makes a squeezing by motion
Gaurav: ... you can talk to bees, but not to giants?
Apheori (GM): Dave stops and watches.
Giant: HORG!
Giant points to Greibel.
(From Ellemerr): I know all languages. Is he full of nonsense?
Giant makes eating gestures.
Greibel: Ah...that's. Um.
Gaurav: Are we still within sight of the house we accidentally ignited, or are we a couple of blocks away at this point?
Ganelon: Weapon at the ready, here.
(To Ellemerr): Giant want drugs. Giant not know how to talk properly after head wound. Greibel can help. Knowing one said so.
Greibel: There's a tavern down that road. The sandwiches are delicious.
Amadi bursts out laughing.
Apheori (GM): You're a few blocks away.
Greibel: Okay I mean, it might not be that road. I wasn't paying very close attention.
Giant: HURG LURG SNOK.
Greibel: I'm sure you'll find it though.
Giant gestures to his head, then points at Greibel again.
Greibel adopts a mock intimidating pose, like what you should do when you see a mountain lion
Gaurav: ... that might still count as an intimidate check
Greibel: BORK BORK BORK SMURG BLAH BLAH BLAH HONK
Giant: LORG DUR SNORG.
Apheori (GM): Roll it!
Greibel: Baaaaaah
Frezak (GM): I CAN ASSIST
Amadi is laughing so hard she might fall off, but Gravy will probably stop her.
Apheori (GM): Gravy: Spot check?
Greibel:
rolling 1d20+2
(
14
)
+2
=
16
Apheori (GM): And others.
If you want.
Frezak (GM): I can add to your intimidate, too.
As soon as I open my sheet.
Ganelon: I'm not trained in being intimidating, shockingly.
The only people afraid of Radek are the ones who know him personally.
Apheori (GM): You're a scientist. You can awkward your way out of anything.
Why would you need intimidation?
Frezak (GM): I thought that's what he was doing.
Oh, him.
Gaurav: what about a sarcasm check? Radek has excellent sarcasm.
Frezak (GM): OKay, rolling assist.
rolling 1D20+6
(
6
)
+6
=
12
So Greibel gets +2 on that.
Perception:
rolling 1D20+10+10+2
(
20
)
+10+10+2
=
42
Gaurav: Rhu's not going to to try to intimidate a stranger. But he's definitely eyeing the giant and making it clear that things are going to get ugly if he tries anything.
Frezak (GM): I SEE ALL.
Apheori (GM): The giant backs away from Greibel, and turns to Amadi, though keeping some distance away from Gravy.
Frezak (GM): ALL IS REAVEALED
Gaurav: It's not really a giant! It's three dwarves in a suit!
Frezak (GM): MY GAZE IS ALL-ENCOMPASSING
42 would let me spot a hiding god.
Apheori (GM): Gravy notices a head wound on the giant. He's also dirty, a bit beat up, has the dregs of some ritual paint all over his body, and he smells afraid more than anything else.
And the anything else is mostly garlic.
The Gravedigger: Hey, Radek? Guy has a head-wound. Anyone know what that ritual paint means?
Apheori (GM): 42 only lets you spot as much as I can think of.
Frezak (GM): Cellular structure!
Giant: (to Amadi) HURG SHURG.
Frezak (GM): Can we roll anything on the paints?
religion?
Gaurav:
rolling 1d20+9 religion check on the ritual paint, I guess.
(
6
)
+9
=
15
(To Amadi): You have. Please help.
Amadi works very, very hard on pulling herself together, and sort of manages.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+3
(
17
)
+3
=
20
Apheori (GM): It's like grawl paint! Or something.
Frezak: Some sort of divination thing, for aid from the spirits.
Radek: So you're saying his incoherent babbling is a speech malfunction rather than an actual language.
Amadi: Greibel, just give the *giggles* give the man some wheeeeee
Amadi laughs some more.
The Gravedigger: Possibly. He's also been... petitioning spirits?
Greibel: I don't think you're supposed to use wheeeeee if you've got serious head trauma
Giant: DURG SHAL BORRG.
Greibel: Never stopped me before, but...
Rhu: Spirits, like ... *makes a drinking-from-a-bottle gesture*?
Giant gestures toward gravy and to his head.
Giant: HOLG.
Greibel: He's giving you a target, big man
The Gravedigger: Nah, not that kind;
THe kind that you talk to AFTER you've drunk.
Greibel: I can only assume he's saying "lay one on me with that spade of yours. Right in the kisser."
Apheori (GM): XD
Amadi: Close! But not quite.
Frezak (GM): I'm Primal, but I don't think I have anything to do with the spirits, generally.
Commune, gorramit!
Apheori (GM): In the meantime Dave wanders off and sits down a few meters away in a patch of dark cobbles or tiles or something.
Giant: URG HOLG SHURG GLOL MOLG.
Giant gestures again to Greibel's bag.
The Gravedigger: Yeah, were' working on it.
Amadi grins at Greibel.
Amadi: He doesn't want something from Gravy. He wants something only yooou can give him!
Bear Soup Guy: MAYBE THE DRUID SHOULD DO A HEAL CHECK
The Gravedigger: I think he wants a spliff.
Greibel:
rolling 1d20+11 check his head thing if he lets me
(
9
)
+11
=
20
Frezak (GM): Or Insight?
Gaurav: Stranger things have happened.
his "head thing"?
Apheori (GM): What's a spliff?
Ganelon: Drugs.
Greibel: A cigarette with tobacco and pot in
Gaurav: spliff == joint with tobacco, I think
Bear Soup Guy: err
Frezak (GM): Of course BSG- I mean Greibel would know that.
Bear Soup Guy: OOC
=D
Apheori (GM): The giant lets you.
Gaurav: Gravy said "spliff" IC, so it makes sense Greibel would try to explain it to the giant.
Apheori (GM): It looks like a skull fracture with a bit of internal pressure, but stabilised.
You have an idea that some drugs might help, though you're not entirely sure which.
On account of him being a giant.
Bear Soup Guy: I'll try to restrain myself from just shoving a spliff right into the fracture
Apheori (GM): Heee.
Giant: SPOLG.
Frezak (GM): How giant IS this giant?
Um.
Actually.
Greibel gets out whatever contents of his bag could be construed as medicine
Frezak (GM): Gravy speaks Giant.
If that helps.
Greibel various herbs I've been carrying around as well as drugs
Greibel gestures toward the giant
Amadi: Yeah. This isn't giant.
Frezak (GM): Just smear stuff on until he gets better.
Apheori (GM): Er, sorry, that was me.
Frezak (GM): I guessed.
Apheori (GM): Selected the wrong one.
Frezak (GM): I'll ask "What's wrong?" in GIant.
JUST IN CASE
Giant: GLURG.
Giant points to his head, then grabs a random herb/drug from greibel and smears it on the wound.
Gaurav: Huh.
Frezak (GM): Hey!
Apheori (GM): Rob: It's up to you what that was.
Frezak (GM): ACONITE
Or... Fly Amanita.
Greibel: I have 40 of something called "rare herbs" and some other stuff I got called SOME USEFUL HERBS
Bear Soup Guy: bah OOC again
Frezak (GM): Those sound like the best kind of herbs.
Bear Soup Guy: They're definitely appropriately named
Gaurav: "How does Greibel organise his drugs?" is a fascinating question
Bear Soup Guy: pfff
"Organize" :P
Ellemerr: I agree.
Pfff, "organize".
Bear Soup Guy: Greibel reaches into his backpack: "This doesn't look like lint or dirt. In the pipe it goes."
Apheori (GM): Greibel is awesome.
Frezak (GM): I have no idea why we assume he has any knowledge of what he's doing.
Radek crosses his arms in a show of mock patience.
Greibel: Did that help your head there, buddy?
Apheori (GM): Okay, you know what? I don't know what it was, you don't know what it was...
The giant stands there for a bit, then says 'GLURN?' and falls over with a loud thud.
Frezak (GM): PROPER JOB
Bear Soup Guy: A+ scores, all around
Radek: Fantastic work, medicine man.
Gaurav: So far today we've killed an old lady, burned down a house, rescued a raccoon named Badger and killed a giant.
The Gravedigger: Well, he's not complaining anymore.
Sounds like success.
Gaurav: ^
Greibel: Sleep, uh...is the best thing for head trauma.
Ellemerr: This is the best day.
Frezak (GM): We're super helpful.
Rhu steps up the giant and checks its pulse.
Frezak (GM): SO should we check his pockets?
No, check his PURSE
Gaurav: Guys watch me roll a 1 and finish him off
Frezak (GM): PURRRRSE
Apheori (GM): Rhu: There's a steady pulse. Slow, but steady.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+12 heal check
(
18
)
+12
=
30
Apheori (GM): It's also...
Hmm.
Bear Soup Guy: A hospital bed and IV pop out of the ether
Apheori (GM): Now I need to come up with someting, curse you.
Frezak (GM): HIS BLOOD IS IGUANAS
Bear Soup Guy: Rhu reviews the writings on a clipboard
Gaurav: Apologies. I honestly thought I was just going to kill him.
Frezak (GM): What, so you INTENTED to MURDER him?
Apheori (GM): Okay, so the giant is definitely alive. Looks like whatever Greibel... well, what it stole from Greibel was some sort of sedative.
Frezak (GM): Oh, I could have done that.
Apheori (GM): You don't know if the head thing is better or not.
But it isn't worse.
Gaurav: In his head, Rhu's character sheet has the words "Heal check" scratched off and "Murder check" written above it.
Rhu: He's fine, he's just asleep. That thing you gave him must have knocked him out.
We should drop him off at the nearest inn or something. Let him sleep it off.
Apheori (GM): Also some of you may notice that Dave and the mouseforged are missing.
Bear Soup Guy: Greibel will rub a bit of all of his herbs on the giant's head for good measure
Rhu: I could use some sleep too, come to think of it.
Gaurav: BSG: heee
Apheori (GM): Greibel: Some of them turn funny colours as they mix. The giant twitches a bit.
Radek: How do you intend to carry him?
Gaurav: We've got the disk the mouseforged rides when he's ... hey? Where's the Mouseforged?
Rhu: We've got the disk the mouseforged rides when he's ... hey? Where's the Mouseforged?
WHERE IS DAVE?!
Rhu panics
Amadi giggles at her book.
The Gravedigger: MR MOUSIE?
Apheori (GM): Greibel and Gravy probably noticed that Dave is just over there.
Well, maybe not Greibel.
But Gravy probably would have.
The mousie, though...
It was following Greibel.
Frezak (GM): UM.
UM.
Gaurav: I guess Rhu sees Dave "over there" also?
Apheori (GM): Rhu wasn't paying attention. Please continue panicking.
Rhu panics some more
(To Amadi): The giant fell on the mouseforged.
(From Amadi): Uh-oh.
Rhu looks around frantically, checking behind every lamppost and down every nearby alley
Frezak (GM): Same.
Though less panicky and more determined.
Greibel: Looks like somebody else is gonna need some herbs soon.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You finally find her sitting right in the middle of the next intersection with a strange charm and a skull in her lap. She seems to be talking to it. The skull, that is. It's not talking back, and this frustrates her.
Frezak (GM): Well, except I'm looking for Mr Mousie
Apheori (GM): Gravy: Do you track?
You're a tracker.
Yes?
Frezak (GM): Sure?
I... can't use Gravyvision just yet, though >.>
rolling 1D20+10
(
18
)
+10
=
28
Man, have /I/ recovered from the Booing Grounds.
Rhu: (to Dave) hey. HEY. There you are. Praise Hazz'ridan, in whom all lost things are found.
Apheori (GM): You follow the path of the mouseforged and find that it was following Greibel all along.
And then the giant fell on it.
Frezak (GM): What.
I'm going to go CDG that giant.
Dave: (To Rhu) Can he find my mind? Or... her mind.
Dave raises the skull.
Gaurav: CDG? Charles de Gaulle?
Apheori (GM): What is CDG?
Ganelon: Coup de Grace.
Frezak (GM): Coup De Grâce.
Ganelon: An execution.
Apheori (GM): Poor giant.
Frezak (GM): Well, I want to check on Mr Mousie first.
Rhu: (to Dave) In him are all endings, including the end of your search. (motions to skull) The mind of that soul, you mean? I didn't think skulls had minds.
Apheori (GM): The mouseforged is underneath. You need to get it out first.
Frezak (GM): GODS DAMN YOU
I have never rolled above... 3 on strength.
Gaurav: At least Mr. Giant got a nap out of this. He probably won't even feel it as Gravy smashes him into a pulp.
Mr ... or Mrs? Are giants sexually dimorphic?
Dave: It's here. Imprisoned. Minds are harder.
Frezak (GM): I will try and heave the giant off my precious comrade.
Apheori (GM): First time for every roll.
Frezak (GM): Athletics.
rolling 1D20+10
(
15
)
+10
=
25
Ooh
Apheori (GM): You roll the giant off the mouseforged.
Gaurav: YAY!
Apheori (GM): It seems a bit... flatter than it was.
Frezak (GM): MEDIC
The Gravedigger: RAAAAADEEEEEK
Rhu reaches out for the skull
Rhu: (to Dave) How do you mean, imprisoned?
Dave hands it to Rhu.
Dave: She's in there. I think.
Elia.
Ellia?
Radek: Graaah!
Frezak (GM): I will pick up Mousie and hold him imploringly.
Rhu: Who's Elia?
Frezak (GM): My eyes may mist.
Amadi frowns at her book.
Amadi: That can't be right...
Apheori (GM): Rhu: The skull seems to be a pretty normal skull. Jawbone is taped on.
Frezak (GM): Like a child with a dead kitten.
Radek: Do you know what I could be doing if I weren't constantly being asked to look after you idiots?
Frezak (GM): Except that I'm a giant horned dude holding up a living golem.
Radek holds up his box of holding.
Radek: This problem could be solved already!
The Gravedigger: Working on destroying the world?
Apheori (GM): Can warforged feel pain?
The Gravedigger: Possibly ununtentionally?
Apheori (GM): The living golem makes sad mousie noises.
Radek: If I wanted to destroy the world, all I would have to do now is /wait/!
Gaurav: A child with a dead kitten is the saddest thing I can imagine.
Frezak (GM): I tihnk they register damage, but I don't think it's 'pain'.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Good.
Ganelon: There's mention of this in, uh...
The thing that talks about them being able to replace parts.
Apheori (GM): You can replace human parts too.
Ganelon: They don't feel pain then, but yeah, they are aware of damage in battle as a bad thing.
Apheori (GM): Just saying.
Sorry. Thanks.
Sad mousie noises are exactly what I wanted, then.
And poor Radek. o_O
Radek: What do you want?
Apheori (GM): Amadi: The passage in the book is replaced with an important message, complete with the header 'Important Message'.
The Gravedigger: Look!
He's all... crumched!
Apheori (GM): Amadi: It says, moving forward isn't the answer. Perhaps it's time to go back.
Ganelon: Back to the future?
Amadi looks for someone to bugger with this clearly vital information.
Ganelon: Back to the island?
Dave: (to Rhu) She's the other one. Key, key, and... well, I'm not a key, but I might do.
Amadi shuffles over to Greibel and pokes the book in his face.
Amadi: Look!
Ganelon: Is the Mouseforged even damaged in a way I could fix?
If that requires a roll, just ask.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You see a recipe for a drug mix.
In the book.
Greibel: Hmm? Oh hey, whatcha reading there?
Useful
Amadi: It's very important! It says so!
Apheori (GM): It's mostly just dented, and some joints mangled. Totally fixable, but it would take time.
Ganelon: Time.
Apheori (GM): Even Gravy might be able to fix it if he had all day, but he'd have to stop hugging it first.
Ganelon: MY TIME IS PRECIOUS
Apheori (GM): Well, in your case it's more like ten minutes with a hammer.
And pliers.
Ganelon: I HAVE DRAGONS TO EVICT
Frezak (GM): Not really.
Rhu: (to Dave) Elia ... that's the person you were looking for, isn't it? How do you know this is her skull, though?
Frezak (GM): I mean, all we're doing is dithering.
Rhu: Where did you find it, even?
Frezak (GM): Oh, I can do that.
Give me a fire-boost and i'll get evicting.
Ganelon: ...Sure.
Greibel: Certainly looks important by the binding
Dave: (to Rhu) I talked to a man. I listened first. And then I talked. And then he gave me a charm, and there was a place, and she was supposed to be there, except she wasn't.
Greibel: So I'm to mix this stuff and it'll be important?
Dave: (to Rhu) But this skull was, and it's her key. I wonder whose it was.
Amadi looks at Greibel as if she's no idea what he's talking about.
Amadi: ... Yes!
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+12 heal check on the skull to see if I can glean anything about the person it used to belong to: male, female, old, young, godling
(
15
)
+12
=
27
Frezak (GM): MANDIBLES
Greibel: Good enough for me.
Radek glares at Gravy for a moment, and then holds up the box.
Radek: There are dragons in this box and I need them out.
Rhu: What man?
Apheori (GM): Rhu: It's female, not ancient, and apparently deresi, nevermind that deresi are supposed to be a myth.
Radek: I don't care how you do it, but if you want me to spend time fixing your problems, you're going to do the same for me.
Rhu: HUH
The Gravedigger: Alive?
Rhu: This is a deseri skull
Apheori (GM): Deresi are a sort of engineered elves. Very powerful, not very smart usually.
Rhu: deresi*
Apheori (GM): Except nobody's ever really seen any, aside from bones that are supposedly theirs...
Radek: Don't care.
Dave: The man who... saw it. He knew me. I don't know.
Rhu: Hmm.
The Gravedigger: And you'll fix Mr. Mousie?
Rhu: So: we needed to find Elia, and now we have, but she's trapped in a deresi skull.
Hmm.
Radek: Yes.
Frezak (GM): GImme that shot and let me at 'em.
Rhu: (to Amadi) Mrs. Teatime? Do you know anything about minds trapped in skulls?
Ganelon: Yep, you may consider yourself fireproofed.
Frezak (GM): INTO THE DARKNESS I GO, TO BURY THE LIGHT
Apheori (GM): Dave gets up and goes over to the others to watch, because this looks interesting.
You dive into the box?
Amadi turns with the book and pokes it in Rhu's face.
Amadi: Look! It's importnat!
Amadi notices the skull and makes an ooo-ing sound. "I have one of those," she says proudly. "Except I can't touch it. So technically, it's not I who have it. But still!"
Frezak (GM): Well, carefully climb.
Apheori (GM): Slight issue - you don't seem to fit through the opening.
Frezak (GM): I'll reach out, grab a piece of dragon and pull.
*reach in
(From Ellemerr): Maybe I should've checked FIRST, but that skull IS Elia's key, like my bong?
Rhu looks up just in time to watch Gravy try to stuff himself into a small box of dragons
(To Ellemerr): Yes.
Ganelon: So, miss DM.
(From Ellemerr): Good. All is good.
Rhu: This is important too, and it is a skull. A deseri skull! It belongs in a museum.
Apheori (GM): You pull a dragon snout out.
Frezak (GM): I pull all the way.
Ganelon: Just out of curiosity, could I get a time estimate on how long it would take to make a robot mouse?
Frezak (GM): until out comes a dragon or it is no longer attached.
Apheori (GM): I'd say a couple hours.
Frezak: Strength.
Ganelon: Hmm.
Apheori (GM): Roll.
Amadi: You'd stick her in a museum? Better be a good one. Most of them are sort of boring. Besides, shouldn't you keep her around?
Frezak (GM): Not Athletics?
Dave: We need her. What is he... doing?
Amadi: I don't know!
Apheori (GM): Strength now. Athletics later.
Rhu: The skull I mean. If there's someone's mind stuck inside, we should liberate it first. But then the skull can be vouchered and preserved.
Amadi: He should read this really important passage!
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+6
(
18
)
+6
=
24
Rhu looks over Amadi's shoulder at this supposedly important passage
Frezak (GM): HNRRRRGH
Amadi: Stuck? Inside her key? We can do that?
Gaurav: Man, Gravy is on a roll today.
Apheori (GM): Gravy: You get the dragon head all the way out with a lot of pulling, but then the shoulders definitely won't fit. Now you have a dragon head sticking out of a box.
Bear Soup Guy: I imagine said dragon head is blinking cartoonishly
Frezak (GM): Shoot her!
SHooooot heeeeer
Ganelon: I guess I'll have to settle for just fixing up the Mouseforged as it is.
Frezak (GM): Gaaaaaan
Ganelon: Yes, yes!
Apheori (GM): It blinks cartoonishly in the light, then starts struggling to get the rest of the way out, but it doesn't really do anything besides cause the box to start bouncing and flailing around.
Athletics to hold onto it.
Ganelon: I'll try and shoot the dragon head.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+10
(
11
)
+10
=
21
Apheori (GM): ...if you want to.
Rhu: Are they ... trying to shoot the dragon?
Frezak (GM): Well I want to hold it steady for Radek.
Apheori (GM): You hold onto the box while the dragon flails about.
Dave: Can't you just let it out?
Increase the aperture or something?
Bear Soup Guy: brb I need to make some food
Dave: (to Amadi, and much quieter) What IS an aperture?
Rhu: It might be dangerous. I'll bet there's a rule against releasing dragons in the city.
Dave: I need to get out of bed.
Apheori (GM): Dammit, ooc.
But I do need to get up. >.<
Ganelon: I'm guessing that no, I can't do this
Amadi: (whispers back to Dave) It's a giant green leech that doesn't go for your blood, but your cavities.
Ganelon: But if I can, now would be a good time to let me know.
Before I shoot.
Frezak (GM): I assumed Radek had already tried.
Apheori (GM): Gravy: You'll have noticed a few dragons overhead already.
Gan: You might be able to!
It's totally science.
Magic.
Stuff.
Ganelon: ...You want an Arcana roll, then?
Apheori (GM): It's also a bit dangerous and could ruin the entire thing, hence maybe why you wouldn't have tried, but perhaps your ego doesn't expect that.
I dunno. Arcana if you want!
Dave: (to Amadi) Ewww!
Ganelon: ...Nah, this is really quite valuable and I'd rather have a dead dragon than risk breaking the box.
Dave: Hentai!
Radek: (Rifle Weapon Attack 27)
Frezak (GM): Wow.
Ganelon: There's a shootin' roll.
Rhu: They ARE trying to shoot a dragon. Well
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Apheori (GM): ...do I need stats for some dragons? >.<
Frezak (GM): How do you get +12?
Apheori (GM): Does anyone have stats for some dragons?
Frezak (GM): Tons.
Amadi: (to Rhu, annoyed) Are you going to read the important thing or not?
Ganelon: +3 (prof)
+5 (int)
+2 (1/2 level)
+1 (enhancement - innate)
+1 (versatile expertise)
Frezak (GM): Enhancement?
Gaurav: There'd be dragons in the Monster Manual. It's on the shelf next to me. But I'd have to get out of bed to reach it.
Ganelon: Innate bonuses.
Frezak (GM): We have Inherents on?
Rhu: (to Amadi) What important thing? (peers at the important thing in the book)
Apheori (GM): Um, hold on, I need to get out of bed.
Ganelon: Or inherent.
Sorry.
Apheori (GM): I'll be right back.
Ganelon: I assumed so, given how loot works in this game.
Which is to say, we never get better weapons or armor, it's all just weird stuff like singing cutlery.
Frezak (GM): If I know what type of dragon and how many we're supposed to fight I can set up an encounter.
I could even run the monsters if needed.
Ellemerr: Desperate much?
Frezak (GM): >.>
Well, I don't have long.
Apheori (GM): Sorry, back.
Ellemerr: She returns!
Apheori (GM): It's not exactly an encounter in that all you'll ever fight is a single head poking out of a box.
And they have no mobility.
Have any stats that would make sense for that?
Frezak (GM): Oh, well then he certainly hit.
Immobile things have 10 AC.
Gaurav: They are magic, though.
Dragons, I mean.
Ganelon: If the thing is scaled to our level, 27 would hit literally anything.
Even something from Ashen Crown.
Frezak (GM): Sure, but it's a mostly immobile head.
If it were a dragon flying around, 27 would hit.
Apheori (GM): It's not scaled down, but it's also just a head.
(It's more scaled to the side.)
Frezak (GM): Well what level would the dragon BE?
Because that would hit a moving, invisible level 6 SOLO dragon.
Apheori (GM): 2pi.
Seriously? I don't know. Would the parts differ/
?
Right, so short of completely missing because a cat sat on his scope, Radek can hit it.
Frezak (GM): Well it would give us an idea of what kind of number he'd need.
But 27 would hit pretty much anything that's not moving.
Yes.
Ganelon: Then the question becomes, what does the hit do?
Apheori (GM): Okay.
It puts a hole in it. If you just keep shooting, you'll kill it. Gravy needs to keep holding the box, though.
Ganelon: Sounds like a plan to me.
Apheori (GM): It's also randomly spewing fire around and it sometimes hits Gravy, but that's why he has fire resistence.
Ellemerr: I'm over here, making Rhu read my book.
Gaurav: Aw, poor dragon.
Yes.
Ellemerr: Not being fired up by draongs.
Frezak (GM): How many Athletics checks do you want?
Rhu looks at the part of the book that Amadi is pointing vehemently at
Apheori (GM): Radek should keep rolling shots, and every time he does, you roll an athletic.
Frezak (GM): Right.
rolling 1D20+10
(
20
)
+10
=
30
YOU ARE SUPER HELD, MISTER DRAGON.
Ganelon: (Rifle Weapon Attack 25)
Frezak (GM): YOU LIFE IS IN MY GRIP.
Gaurav: WOAH
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You see a block of text you can't read. Scribbled in the margin is a note that says 'This is all wrong. You need to go back to the beginning.'
Frezak (GM): AND I WILL CLENCH LIKE NO-ONE HAS EVER CLENCHED
Apheori (GM): Excellent.
Do it again.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+10
(
19
)
+10
=
29
CLose!
Ganelon: (Rifle Weapon Attack 21)
Gaurav: He did it again!
Frezak (GM): Man, I am so going back to the Booing Grounds for this.
And it'll be back to four 1s a fight.
Ganelon: Well right now you're being awesome, so don't stop.
Frezak (GM): Not dead yet?
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+14 perception check on the block of text I can't read, particularly if there are any clues as to why: is the writing blurry, can my eyes no focus on it, etc.
(
14
)
+14
=
28
Apheori (GM): Thanks to your excellent grip, the dragon is also unable to fry your companions.
Again.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+10
(
14
)
+10
=
24
Ganelon: (Rifle Weapon Attack 22)
I have to say, I'm loving Radek's accuracy.
Not even his rolls. They're pretty average today.
Frezak (GM): Like shooting armoured fire-breathing fish in a half-open barrel.
Ganelon: Just the bonus.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You try to discern what's with the text. It seems somewhat curly and weird, and then your hair catches fire.
Frezak (GM): CORRESPONDENCE
Ganelon: ...It's Correspondence?
Apheori (GM): Again.
Frezak (GM): HAH
rolling 1D20+10
(
11
)
+10
=
21
Ganelon: In a book!?
(Rifle Weapon Attack 13)
Frezak (GM): LOSING... POWER
Ganelon: Damn.
Frezak (GM): GAAAAAN
Apheori (GM): Just do it again.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+10
(
8
)
+10
=
18
Ganelon: (Rifle Weapon Attack 32)
Frezak (GM): Power.... failing
Ganelon: HAHA!
Apheori (GM): Aaaand the dragon is dead.
Frezak (GM): YEssss
Now...
How many more are there?
Gaurav: There's something strange about this ... eep!
Apheori (GM): You now have a dead dragon head poking hanging out of a box.
Rhu: There's something strange about this ... eep!
Frezak (GM): Anyone have a cutting thing?
I have... an enchanted trowel?
Rhu tries to put the fire out with his hands and, if that doesn't work, with his cowl
Ganelon: Shovel heads can be sort of sharp.
Apheori (GM): You can't tell how many are left because the opening is full of dragon neck.
Amadi looks at Rhu's hair, then the book, then back at his hair.
Amadi: Huh.
Amadi attempts eating the fire again. Hopefully without eating Rhu.
Frezak (GM): Well we can lay the box down and I'll just shovel-chop the neck.
Apheori (GM): Y'all are getting some weird looks from passerby.
Frezak (GM): Pretty sure there are no laws against this.
Radek claps heartily.
Radek: Good, good! Now just remove the obstruction while I see to the Mouseforged.
Gaurav: Whyever so? Is it the dragon heads we're shooting at? The heads catching fire? The unconscious giant on the ground?
Apheori (GM): Amadi: Roll arcana.
Amadi:
rolling 1d20
(
13
)
=
13
Ganelon: What a bunch of hypocrites. We've seen the people in this madhouse doing way crazier stuff.
Ellemerr: I have a bonus somewhere and I can find it.
Ganelon: It's at least +2, Merr.
From 1/2 level.
Ellemerr: It's 10.
Frezak (GM): Amadi... has +10.
To arcana.
Y'all fucked.
Apheori (GM): The fire leaps to Amadi's head and forms a sort of crown.
Frezak (GM): Delightful.
Ellemerr: It's one of the two things I'm good at. The other is words.
Amadi giggles.
Ganelon: Okay, so now it's time I hold up my end of the deal and do some mouse maintenance.
Gaurav: This isn't that surprising, she is basically what magic would look like if magic looked like an elven midget.
Ellemerr: Yeah.
Rhu keeps beating at his head for a while, then turns to Amadi and Dave and asks, "is it out?"
Amadi: Nope! It's up!
Rhu: ... up?
Amadi giggles more.
Frezak (GM): Aaaaand that's it from me for the next hour or so.
Rhu feels his head and assures himself that it is no longer on fire
Ganelon: Thanks for help with the dragon thing, Frezak.
Bear Soup Guy: Adios Frezak
Apheori (GM): Bye, love.
Ellemerr: Don't scare him, dearest.
Apheori (GM): What should I do instead?
Ellemerr: I have no idea.
Are we breaking? I could use more food.
Ganelon: Instead of D&D?
Apheori (GM): Instead of scaring him.
Should we break, then, the lot?
Gaurav: I'm okay with any option, including meeting again in an hour if Frezak might be returning.
Ganelon: Well, he's just eating with his family.
Unless they're known to employ poison, we'll probably see him again.
Apheori (GM): Let's see if he can return, then.
And if not, this isn't a horrible place to end for the... eh...
I won't be able to do next sunday.
Gaurav: What about weekdays this week?
Apheori (GM): I could do wednesday.
Gaurav: I have a meeting until 12:30 or 1pm MT (2 hours from now) on Wednesday, but I could meet after then.
Ganelon: Anything works for me.
Bear Soup Guy: Pretty sure wednesday is clear for me
Ellemerr: I get home about one hour ago and need sleep in about three to four hours on wednesdays. But I'm good.
Apheori (GM): Would tuesday work better?
Ellemerr: *shrugs*
Gaurav: I don't have anything scheduled for Tuesday yet, so yes.
I could meet at 8am MT (usual Sunday time) or 11am MT (usual Tuesday time) or whenever.
Bear Soup Guy: If we do around the time we usually meet sundays then I could probably swing Tuesday
Might have some things going on in the afternoon though
Apheori (GM): Tuesday morning!
Probably.
We'll verify later.
Bear Soup Guy: Indeed
Ellemerr: I'll go have some noodles.
Apheori (GM): Excellent.
Gaurav: I have some awful frozen pizza to poke dismally at, but I'll be back in 50 mins to check on Frezak. Someone please drop me an e-mail if things get restarted sooner than expected!
Frezak (GM): 10 minutes
ish
I have ot eat cake
Gaurav: what sort of cake?
Frezak (GM): its delishioush
Apheori (GM): I... may have started a dungeon. >.<
Ellemerr: I'm glowing. O_o
Frezak (GM) shrugs
Apheori (GM): Cake eaten?
Frezak (GM): Which you?
Apheori (GM): What?
Bear Soup Guy: which merr
Frezak (GM): Well, I have some with me here.
Many, many Merrs
Apheori (GM): Glowing merrs.
Frezak (GM): How many lumens?
IT'S STILL WARM
Apheori (GM): Sixteen.
Frezak (GM): Liar.
Gaurav: Is everybody back?
Ganelon: I'm here.
Frezak (GM): I was never heeeeere
I'm just a shadow of the hag.
Apheori (GM): I'm not etirely here, but if you tell me to get here I will.
Frezak (GM): Long and dark and filled with goslings.
Some people juggle them, alright?
Gaurav: Why would a hag need a shadow?
Frezak (GM): They cast them like they cast curses.
Constantly, often without trying.
Gaurav: Is BSG back? He was here a minute ago.
Bear Soup Guy: yep-o
Gaurav: yay! let us rebegin?
Frezak (GM): Let's see some robot-making.
Ganelon: You want one made or simply fixed?
Frezak (GM): Yes.
Ganelon: I thought you were better than this.
Frezak (GM): Better than what?
Apheori (GM): Okay, here.
Ganelon: Giving me useless, nonspecific answers.
Apheori (GM): He wants both.
Frezak (GM): "yes" is entirely accurate.
Means both.
SEE?
Apheori (GM): He wants a mouse, and he wants this one fixed.
Frezak (GM): EVEN NAMES UNDERSTOOD
Apheori (GM): Such is my normal usage.
Rhu notices that Amadi's head is now wreathed in fire.
Apheori (GM): And yet you accuse me of being fuzzy...
But you do the same!
Rhu: Um, Mrs. Teatime ...
The Gravedigger: I don't think she's married.
You married, shardling?
Amadi: Hm?
Ganelon: Well, let's start with the fixing.
rolling 1d20+12 Arcanamechanics
(
12
)
+12
=
24
Rhu: Ms. Teatime, then? Either way, your, um, head. Is kind of. On fire?
Kind of.
The Gravedigger: Looks like a hat.
Apheori (GM): You fixed the casing!
The Gravedigger: She's not screaming, so it's probably not that bad.
UNless she is and we can't hear it.
Rhu considers this possibility, then takes a step back
Dave sidles up to Greibel and asks to borrow his bong.
The porridge oozes over to Radek and 'helps'.
Frezak (GM): I better see an Arcana check from that animate breakfast.
The porridge:
rolling 1d20 - 1d12
(
3
)
-
(
2
)
=
1
Frezak (GM): Oh, wow.
Amadi: I am not married. I'm the Queen of Fire.
Frezak (GM): That's helping.
The porridge gets in Radek's hair.
Amadi: If I was married there'd be a King. Don't want that.
Ganelon: ...
Dave: There is a King.
Not fire, though... what is in your hair? (to Radek)
Rhu: Fair enough. Just Teatime, then? Can you read what's written here? I can just read the note that says it's all wrong.
And I don't know why you think that's important. What book is this, anyway?
Rhu peers at the book's cover
Radek: Something which is about to be disintegrated if it doesn't /get out/.
The porridge slides out of Radek's hair.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: It says 'The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Planes'.
Rhu: Huh.
Apheori (GM): Radek: Another arcana to fix more!
Radek:
rolling 1d20+12
(
6
)
+12
=
18
Ganelon: Hmm.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: And someone wrote underneath in faded pencil, 'Amended version'.
Ganelon: Pretty soggy.
Frezak (GM): SHAPE UP, GAN.
Apheori (GM): Good enough. The innards are mostly solid and you fix them without breaking anything. Now do the rest.
Radek:
rolling 1d20+12
(
17
)
+12
=
29
Frezak (GM): THanks.
Apheori (GM): Before the very confused mouseforged does something... well, nevermind.
Rhu goes back to looking at the skull.
Apheori (GM): You finish up and it tries to hug you.
Frezak (GM): Really?
Radek: Oh, uh...
Frezak (GM): THat's not very mousey.
WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?
Apheori (GM): Neither is being a warforged.
WHAT HAS HE DONE?!
Frezak (GM): Sure, but as far as I knew the mousie didn't really know that it was.
Apheori (GM): And as far as you know it could be trying to climb him.
Which it is. Radek! Roll a thing to not get knocked over.
It's making excited noises, and where is Greibel?
Ganelon: Uh, a thing?
Apheori (GM): I don't know which is appropriate, but surely there's something. Or is there?
Ganelon: Sure, but you have to decide what.
Apheori (GM): Unless you want to push it on Gravy.
Ellemerr: I'm distracted by glowing. I'm very sorry.
Ganelon: Like, is it athletics?
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Gaurav: I think the mouse forged should roll something against Radek, and we can see if his FORT is enough to withstand it.
Ganelon: That might make more sense.
Apheori (GM): Oh, okay.
Frezak (GM): Acrobatics, more like.
Ganelon: His fort and athletics are both terrible, though
Frezak (GM): Well, that's usual way to handle it in 4E, Rave.
Apheori (GM): What's the 4e equivalent of a climb?
Gaurav: Grab? Acrobatics?
Frezak (GM): Athletics check.
Ganelon: Athletics is used to climb, but against stable surfaces.
Bear Soup Guy: sorry, greibel is here
I dozed off a little bit in my chair
Apheori (GM): GREIBEL!
Dave wants to borrow your bong. Do you let her?
Bear Soup Guy: Surely but I check to make sure she isn't hiding something potent that'll get her loopy and her head in the clouds again
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 + 1d8 because I have no idea what it should be mouseforged athletics to climb Radek... vs fortitude!!
(
3
)
+
(
2
)
=
5
Okay, mouseforged falls on the floor instead. That works.
Ganelon: ...Well.
Frezak (GM): Good 'ole Stonebones Radek.
Radek: Alright Gravy, your mouse friend is... as operational as it was before.
The Gravedigger: Thanks, Radek.
Ganelon: How's the whole dragon-box situation coming along?
Gaurav:
rolling 1d20+9 religion check: Rhu prays to Hazz' for wisdom in dealing with skulls with minds inside, while searching his own mind to see if he remembers anything like this in any of the scriptures he's read
(
16
)
+9
=
25
Ganelon: Have we got a severed dragon head yet?
Apheori (GM): Gravy: You severing?
Frezak (GM): If I didn't before I left, yes.
(To Rhu): Those are the keys. Three keys to break the realms, and three to close them. Kyrule did not know what he created.
Rhu: Ah. And ... this is a key also, is it? (wiggles skull at the heavens)
Amadi: I told you that already.
(To Amadi): He isn't very good at listening, is he?
Rhu looks the skull right in the empty eye-sockets
Rhu: Maybe we should take this to look at the Book in the Library
Bear Soup Guy: "TELL ME YOUR SECRETS"
Dave: (waving the bong for emphasis) She's dead, mate.
(From Amadi): "Well, he's YOUR-"
Rhu: She's dead, but also a key.
Amadi starts screaming.
(To Amadi): Stop that.
Ganelon: What kind of screaming?
Ellemerr: The loud and ongoing kind.
Hazz'ridan forcibly shuts Amadi up.
Rhu: (to Dave) Do you know if she was --- (turns to Amadi and tries to block his ears while still holding the skull)
Ganelon gasps.
Rhu: (to Dave) --- a Deresi? Did you know her back when you were a ... god-person?
Amadi looks shocked and a little scared and very, very angry.
Amadi attempts mentally screaming at Hazz.
Dave hastily hands the bong to Rhu.
Gaurav gets some popcorn
Dave suddenly starts screaming as Amadi was.
The Gravedigger: We could just leave.
Rhu takes the bong, looks at it in confusion, then tries to hand it to Greibel
Apheori (GM): Gravy: When you hacked the dragon head off, the rest of the dragon slid back into the box. You can now see that there are two other, now rather afraid, dragons remaining. They shrink away from the opening.
Gaurav: Aw. Poor dragons.
Ellemerr: Poor dragons. o_o
Radek strolls over to the box and looks in.
The Gravedigger: There's a couple more in here.
Gaurav: GREIBEL!
Have a bong
The Gravedigger: Could you potshot them from outside?
Dave is still screaming.
Rhu tries to block his ears while holding a skull in one hand and a bong in the other. It doesn't work.
Amadi goes over and puts her arms protectively around Dave.
Rhu: (to Amadi, over the screaming) WHAT IS SHE SCREAMING FOR? DO YOU KNOW?
(From Ellemerr): Do I know what it is? It's not her Key, is it? I don't know what her Key is. I'm not sure she has one.
(To Ellemerr): She doesn't, and you don't know. It just started when you couldn't anymore.
Radek: Maybe. For now, leaving sounds rather attractive.
Gaurav: Do we have any sedatives? Can Rhu try to sedate Dave with a heal check?
Amadi ponders, then grins and yells, "Maybe she's helping me!"
Dave finally stops, and then smacks Amadi in the face.
Amadi looks hurt and angry again.
The Gravedigger: Anything we can do with this head?
Ganelon: Good question!
Do I know/can I find that out?
Apheori (GM): If anyone knows, it's you.
What can an artificer do with a dragon head?
Ganelon: Well, maybe some alchemy.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+7 insight check to see if Rhu even notices that Amadi looks hurt and angry
(
20
)
+7
=
27
Gaurav: stick it on the mouseforged
Bear Soup Guy: oh greibel takes the bong
Gaurav: dracomusforged
Bear Soup Guy: sorry went afk
Amadi lets go of Dawn and goes over to sit down behind the Mouseforge, looking sullen.
Ganelon: Woundpatches, bombs, or Alchemist's Fire/Acid, perhaps.
If it's useful at all, anyways.
If you agree, just give me another arbitrary number for how much stuff I could extract from just the head.
Frezak (GM): Maybe Greibel can smoke it.
Ganelon: I suspect there are few things he cannot.
Bear Soup Guy tries to think up a pun playing on "head change"
Apheori (GM): Rhu: I think you noticed. And you may even have some idea why. Folks keep hating on her.
The Gravedigger shouts into the hole.
The Gravedigger: Sorry, a little misunderstanding. If you guys come out we won't kill you.
Ganelon: Cheap Alchemist's fire is 25, a better version that I'm just barely qualified to make is 100.
Frezak (GM): Worth a shot.
Apheori (GM): One of the dragons says something long and low in response.
Frezak (GM): Druuuuuuid!
Bear Soup Guy: Do I speak dragon?
I hope I speak dragon
Apheori (GM):
rolling 2d200 stuff from dragon head
(
193
+
136
)
=
329
Huh.
Frezak (GM): Hadn't considered that dragons weren't terrible things that eat people.
BLAME THE MERR.
Nice.
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Frezak (GM): When do we enchant our shizzle?
Ellemerr: Hey wait what?!
Frezak (GM): I keep thinking of Mara and her friend, Merr.
Apheori (GM): BSG: Try speaking dragon.
Ganelon: When people have requests and I have time.
Ellemerr: They weren't even real dragons!
Frezak (GM): Well.
+1 to base gear is never refused.
I KNOW.
Bear Soup Guy: A 200-sided die, now there would be a sight
Rhu: (to Amadi and Dave) Did either of you know her? (wiggles skull)
Ganelon: Remember that one time Karstein rolled a 1 on a d200?
Greibel strolls over and pushes his head in the box to get a good look
Ellemerr: And for that matter, I don't know if these are either!
Ganelon: And just thought it was a d20?
Greibel: You guys okay down there?
Amadi sticks her tongue out at Rhu and shuffles around the mouseforge to get it between as many people and herself as possible.
Rhu: I found a d100: http://www.unclesgames.com/images/products/N00390_big.jpg
Radek: Careful, they might try the same trick on you that Gravy got one of them with.
Bear Soup Guy: eek
Ellemerr: Man, I'd love having a d100. I've seen one, once.
Bear Soup Guy: you'd need to have the table walled off to keep it from rolling off XD
Frezak (GM): THe most deadly polyhedron.
Or just roll it realllllly gently.
More sort of brush than roll.
Bear Soup Guy: indeed
"there ya go little fella, one step at a time"
Dave: I told you. That's Ellia.
Rhu watches Amadi go, then turns to Dave
Rhu: Yes, but did you know her?
Back when she was less ... a disembodied skull
Ellemerr: phone
Dave shakes her head slowly.
Apheori (GM): BSG: How drugged are you?
Roll a d20.
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20
(
4
)
=
4
Rhu: I wonder if _she_ did (motions at Amadi with the skull)
Is it nearly lunchtime yet?
Frezak (GM): Dragon sandwiches!
Bear Soup Guy: Rhu's appetite clearly knows no bounds
Disembodied head in hand "I could sure go for some ribs."
Apheori (GM): AGH DAMN YOU ELLEMERR.
Ellemerr: WHAT
Apheori (GM): You distracted me.
Okay.
GREIBEL!
Bear Soup Guy: At your service
Apheori (GM): You asked if the dragons are okay down there?
Bear Soup Guy: That was my genus opening line, yes
Apheori (GM): They respond saying they want out. They've been trapped for a very long time and crap.
Please help them and crap; they do not want to fight you.
They also seem to be a bit freaked out at the dead companion.
Frezak (GM): Ooops.
Ganelon: I'm not apologizing!
Frezak (GM): Yeah, but you're evil.
Greibel: Well that's good, because we don't want to be carrying dragons around any more than you want to be carried around. No offence.
Frezak (GM): Action-wise, you're basically a Lich.
Greibel: Do you know this planet? Could you fly around and stuff?
Apheori (GM): Greibel: They tell you that the pocket is tied to the box; separate it, or change the box, and they should be able to get out. It's just too small.
Greibel: They have no idea what planet this is, but if they could fly again, it would be a wonderful, wonderful thing.
Greibel: Okay, let me check with the science man. Back in a jiffy!
Greibel pops his head out of the box
Greibel: Radek, they say we have to separate the box from the pocket, whatever that means.
Then they'll fly away and gladly leave us be.
Ganelon: Do these words make any more sense to Radek than they do to me?
Apheori (GM): Let's say they do, sort of. It's kind of bad terminology.
The pocket probably refers to a pocket dimension, or pocket of space - the idea there wouldn't be to separate it, which would just close it off completely, but separate it from this specific opening with a new one or something.
Gaurav: So here's a crazy idea: can we fit one of the portals in the box?
Frezak (GM): OH GODS.
Radek: ...I'll need an opening big enough to fit them through.
(To Gaurav): Yes.
Gaurav: if there are whale people around here, there are probably ... mouse people, or whatever. pop one of their portals in to the box, Bag of Holding rules expands it to dragon size, they fly through. And then you have a Bag of Holding with a portal in it.
... which might destroy the universe or something.
Destroy it more I mean.
Frezak (GM): Get a length of rope.
Tie it into a loop.
Make that the entrance.
Then it's resizeable.
Apheori (GM): Like blowing a bubble!
Frezak (GM): Yep.
Bear Soup Guy: That is genius
Frezak (GM): ANd we can abduct cows with ease.
And just start snatching anythign.
Apheori (GM) cackles.
Frezak (GM): Possibly small buildings.
Ellemerr: back
Ganelon: Is that our final solution?
Bear Soup Guy: Seems like a pretty good one
Ganelon: Alright then!
Apheori (GM): Radek can get assists from the crazy ladies! They're both trained in arcana.
...for some reason.
Ganelon: Oh boy.
Gaurav: "trained"?
Ganelon: Then they must roll and beat 10.
Frezak (GM): I'm really sorry.
Ellemerr: I have 10.
But I guess I have to not roll a 1.
How is Amadi assisting while being completely sullen elsewhere, though?
Apheori (GM): She doesn't have to. But dragons!
Ganelon: I guess she means, you may assist me if you want to.
Apheori (GM): Exactly.
It'd be funny. I have no idea if it would even help.
But it'd be funny.
Ellemerr: *I*d like to.
Dave runs to the box, yelling excitedly, "We're getting the dragons out!"
Dave: Eeeee dragons!
Apheori (GM): She can stop being sullen.
Rhu looks around for something to hide behind
Apheori (GM): Rhu can also... I dunno.
What's he doing with that skull?
Ganelon: Pray that nothing fucks up?
Gaurav: Just holding on to it.
Oh crap yes.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+9 religion check to pray that nothing fucks up
(
7
)
+9
=
16
Amadi glares at Dawn but creeps out and peers with some interest at the dragons.
Apheori (GM): Radek: You now have two crazy ladies peering into the box.
Do you have a rope? Roll!
Amadi:
rolling 1d20
(
15
)
=
15
Ellemerr: +10
Frezak (GM): We all have rope.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 +7 for Dave
(
10
)
+7
=
17
Frezak (GM): Future rope, no less.
Apheori (GM): So Radek puts a loop of that on the box opening, so it lines up exactly, and...
...hopefully doesn't totally botch the magic.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+12+2+2
(
15
)
+12+2+2
=
31
Gaurav: WOO
Ganelon: He raises his arms all dramatically and magic shit happens.
Ellemerr: I thought he was using his hands to hold the rope?
Apheori (GM): He was. Then he magicked. He has two lovely assistants, you know.
Anyway, it works perfectly. Radek raises the loop of rope and the opening is now attached to it, leaving behind a now perfectly ordinary box... that crumbles to dust.
Frezak (GM): Dussssst!
Apheori (GM): Well, probably all three of them raise it. It's like dramatical and crap.
Gaurav: wow
that was awesome
Frezak (GM): So crap.
I mean.
Dramatical
Amadi looks proud for a moment, then notices Dawn and glares again.
Dave suddenly looks embarrassed and quickly backs away.
Ganelon: So do dragons come flying out of our rope portal?
Apheori (GM): I assume you make the opening bigger, then?
Ganelon: Well yeah.
Apheori (GM): Aiight, so you make it loop of rope bigger and lie it out on the ground. A dragon pulls itself out and takes a few steps, looking around. Then the other squeezes through as well and takes off almost immediately. The first follows.
Then Dave flies off after them too.
Rhu: HEY!
Radek: ...Fantastic.
Rhu stares helplessly into the sky after Dave
Gaurav: ... then they all get eaten by a gryphon.
Apheori (GM): Radek: You now have a rope of holding, with only most of a dead dragon in it.
Frezak (GM): I'm sure there must be SOMETHING we can do with it.
Other than sandwiches.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: The dragons soar overhead, roaring strange words into the wind. Another dragon joins in and they swoop a lot. You think you see a much smaller figure in it as well.
Gaurav: Sell it?
Rhu sighs.
Rhu: Hazz'ridan is probably not going to like this.
Amadi: Awesome.
I think that's the best thing you've said all day.
(To Amadi):
(To Amadi): ...did it just eat my heart? I tried to send a heart.
Frezak (GM): We could streetwise to find an apothecary?
(From Amadi): Yeah, those don't work.
(To Amadi): Bastard of an interface!
Rhu looks unhappily at Amadi, then unhappily at the skull, then unhappily back up at the Dave speck
Radek bundles up the rope with a satisfied look on his face.
Rhu: I suppose she'll be back.
Apheori (GM): Frezak: You could.
Frezak (GM): But Amadi has streetwise.
Apheori (GM): Who has diplomacy?
Apheori (GM) runs.
Ellemerr: Me. ;P
Bear Soup Guy: Literally Amadi is the only member of the party who knows how to intentionally not make enemies while talking to people
Ganelon: Radek might have some, I think?
Gaurav: Before this campaign ends, I want to see one of us roll a natural twenty on a diplomacy check
Frezak (GM): I have intimidate and... digging.
Ganelon: Yeah, he has 7 diplomacy.
Bear Soup Guy: Oh, not bad then
Ellemerr: Dipl is Amadi's highest. 11.
Frezak (GM): BLuff is Amadi's Highest.
Ellemerr: Oh, right. I forgot that one.
Apheori (GM): Digging is a valuable communication skill.
Especially among wombats.
Ellemerr: Heeeee
Apheori (GM): So who wants to streetwise to find an apothecary?
Frezak (GM): Not me.
Gaurav: Not me.
Frezak (GM): Amaaaaaadiiii
Help ussssss
Gaurav: Could I have an update on Dave's location, please?
Ellemerr: Why?
Apheori (GM): In the sky probably. You can't see her anymore. Some dragons are visible, but they may or may not be the right ones.
Actually they may or may not even be dragons.
Rhu sighs, then prays to Hazz' to keep Dave safe
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+9 religion check for that last prayer
(
1
)
+9
=
10
Gaurav: oops
Ellemerr: *cackles*
Gaurav: Rhu accidentally prays to Dave to keep Hazz' safe.
Ganelon: "Lightning strikes."
Apheori (GM): *cackles*
Ellemerr! He's praying to us! We've finally broken him!
Gaurav: Sarathi broke me. The rest has just been custard on the pudding.
Maybe the consequences of that '1' will be bad enough that it will amuse Amadi and she'll help us find an apothecary.
Frezak (GM): Or we just ignore it and have it for lunch.
Apheori (GM): No apparent (immediate) consequences, unfortunately.
Lunch?
Frezak (GM): Lunch?
Ganelon: Someone's probably got the Nature required to tell us if Dragon is safe to eat.
Gaurav gulps
Frezak (GM): I have 10, but Greibel has more I think.
Apheori (GM): Greibel might be smoking it.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+10
(
3
)
+10
=
13
There it is!
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20+13 dragon nature
(
7
)
+13
=
20
Apheori (GM): Gravy: You examine a piece and realise it smells funny, like there's something odd in it.
Gaurav: I feel like if we wander the town long enough with a dead dragon body, we'll be pointed to someone who might be interested in it soon enough
or a dragon will swoop down from the skies and attack us for killing its kin, one or the toher
Apheori (GM): BSG: It needs to be cooked special. And the extra odd something in it makes a good drug. But you don't want to eat it.
The Gravedigger: I tihnk they're bad.
Ellemerr: I think I should sleep. >.<
Frezak (GM): Blaaargh!
Radek: I'm sure I could do /something/ with this...
Bear Soup Guy: I should probably call my dad back
Apheori (GM): Basically you need to separate the meat from the oddities.
Like... uh... some kind of fish folks make?
I dunno.
Ganelon: Blowfish.
Apheori (GM): Right.
Frezak (GM): Anyone have butchery as a skill?
Gaurav: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fugu?
Apheori (GM): Perhaps now is the time to break. Can we all come back tuesday?
Alternately the next would be the sunday after next. The 8th.
Gaurav: I can do Tuesday morning.
Frezak (GM): I think I'm free tuesday;
Ellemerr: I should be available.
Bear Soup Guy: likewise
Ganelon: Of course.
Apheori (GM): Excellent.
You can deal with the dragon then.
Bear Soup Guy: Most exciting thing I've ever done on a tuesday
Frezak (GM): You clearly haven't been chased by a boar.
Gaurav: Same time as on Sunday?
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Gaurav: Sounds good, see y'all then. Hooray for resizable bags of holding! Bye!
Bear Soup Guy: Bye everybody!
Apheori (GM): Goodbye, my sweets.
Ellemerr: *hugs everyone and runs away*

Session 24

Apheori (GM): Okay.
You all are still by the giant, right?
Gaurav: >.<
That poor giant.
Apheori (GM): Okay, so you're in the streets of Arah, near some sort of square, with a passed-out giant behind you. You now have a rope loop of holding and a skull, among other random things. Amadi is who knows. Dave and the dragons are gone. There's a huge gateway arching overhead, but it doesn't appear to be active.
Random passersby pass you by.
Frezak (GM): Doing their job.
Apheori (GM): Including a guy in a clown suit, a giant bear, and others.
Frezak (GM): They're paid to walk up and down the streets.
Gaurav: A ... giant bear?
Apheori (GM): A giant bear.
Bear Soup Guy gets antsy
Bear Soup Guy: "No. No. Not again. Not like this."
Ganelon: Antsy? Not hungry?
Bear Soup Guy: Chowing down into some tofu soup presently :)
Rhu looks dismally after Dave
Rhu: Do you think she'll be back?
Greibel: If there's one thing you can almost guarantee about these two
It's that they'll always be back
(muttering) Usually at the least convenient time
Rhu: That is true. (to skull) At least you're not going anywhere.
Radek: Well, in the meantime, let's try something productive.
Radek holds up the rope of holding.
Radek: Who wants to create a Hole?
The Gravedigger: Aw, man.
Greibel: Closing one would be nicer. But sure, that works too.
The Gravedigger: I'm sure that's lots of not great.
Apheori (GM): A gaggle of schoolchildren pass by attached to some sort of teacher golem.
They're hideously cute.
Frezak (GM): I read that as 'leather golem'
Apheori (GM): You may feel free to grab one and use it for hole-making if you'd like.
Bear Soup Guy: Well now the thought can't be unthought
Apheori (GM): I'm not advising it. But it could be entertaining if Radek is asshole enough.
Or something.
Apheori (GM) gestures vaguely.
Bear Soup Guy: I assume he's definitely asshole enough but not in the mood to get into legal trouble
Gaurav: ... legal trouble?
We just exploded a house, drugged a giant and let lose some dragons.
Bear Soup Guy: Yeah but it all gets more complicated when kids get involved =P
Gaurav: But if there is any time to try, it is now, when clearly the long arm of the law is otherwise occupied
Dealing, if nothing else, with the path of devastation we've left in our wake.
Bear Soup Guy: Excellent point
Radek: We need a Hole to attempt closing it. We know how to create one. This rope contains a pocket dimension.
Not only is it portable, but it is /disposable./
Bear Soup Guy: Convenient. What do we do?
err
Rhu looks distractedly at Radek, tries for a minute to understand the technicalities of what he's saying, gives up, sighs, and looks back up at the sky for any signs of Dave.
Greibel: Convenient. What do we do?
Radek: First, we must fail.
Greibel: Right. That...shouldn't be a problem for us.
The Gravedigger: At least we're qualified.
Radek: Specifically, fail at magic. We will recreate the event which occurred outside the wizards' college.
Inside the rope, of course.
Gaurav: I still think that's a bad idea, especially in the city of portals, double-especially since we have a stable portal back near the commune/village to experiment on, but ... Radek seems enthusiastic, and I kind of want to see where that enthusiasm is going to land us :)
Frezak (GM): Well.
We coudl.... hide behind a wall?
Ganelon: Understanding the event that makes Holes could be helpful too.
Gaurav: There aren't any portals near us, are there? Normal Arah portals, I mean.
Apheori (GM): Well, the floor is open. You can do whatever you want. If you want something in particular, you need only ask.
Ganelon: Well, we were next to a gateway.
Apheori (GM): There is a high arch overhead, a few nearby.
A few smaller ones, I mean.
Frezak (GM): So we kidnap a wizard and scare him into failure
Gaurav: Or we attack one of these portals until somebody calls to stop us/fix it, and then we ask them.
Ganelon: I'm sure Radek is *capable* of failure.
Gaurav: Actually, Rhu would approve of any plan that involves kidnapping a wizard. Just for the sake of the thing.
Apheori (GM): There's a single portal to your left.
Ganelon: If you have your own plans, feel free to just attempt them while he's doing this.
And if you know a quick way to find a wizard, let me know.
Apheori (GM): Rhu doesn't like wizards?
Bear Soup Guy: Blow the wizard horn, obviously
Apheori (GM): How would you detect a wizard?
Gaurav: Gan: What?! And waste valuable staring-up-dismally-at-the-sky time?
Apheori: he finds them obtuse, annoying and dangerous, and that's before he realised that they're somehow behind all these Holes things
Rhu wanders over to the portal on our left and looks around for any sort of instructions or anything
Ganelon: I guess I'm far-removed enough from being a wizard to be disliked for other wholly legitimate reasons?
Rhu: Apheori: I'm also tempted to say he tried to get into wizard school at some point and failed out. I'm not sure if that fits into the rest of his story, though.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: It has a bunch of graffiti scribbled on it, and a picture of a dick.
Bear Soup Guy: "This means something. This is important."
Apheori (GM): It says 'loldongs'.
Gaurav: Gan: I think he's more annoyed by the wizard equivalent of academia than by wizards themselves. Like, he'd be fine with adventuring wizards or a wizard working at Ye Olde Wizardery Shoppe; it's just the ones who live in fancy universities, who are snobbish about relatively uneducated people like Rhu, and who insist on being obtuse and dangerous all the time that annoy him. Radek is out trying to make a difference &c. which is fine by him.
Guys, I think the Dreaded Loldong has been this way.
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Gaurav: Apheori: no control panels on the portal or anything? I could perception/insight if that might help?
Bear Soup Guy: I'm starting a petition for the Dread Pirate Loldong to be an NPC in this campaign
Gaurav: Loldong, Doge of Venice
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Apheori (GM): It's basically a single solid stone arch - no panels, no controls.
You should arcana it.
Gaurav: XD
That is a terrible idea.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+4 arcana check on the arch
(
14
)
+4
=
18
Apheori (GM): Duuude, it's like an arch or something.
Also it's got magic in it and seems to be on, though not active. You're not entirely sure how to activate it.
Frezak (GM): Arcana!
Not... architecture!
gorram it, cultist.
Gaurav: Oh. Hey. Is that guy in a clown suit still around?
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+3
(
18
)
+3
=
21
also arcana.
Because I'm a genius.
Apheori (GM): Frezak: Smacking it should activate it.
Clownsuit guy is gone, but there's a guy in a chickensuit. And a drunk in a clown nose.
Frezak (GM): I'll engage a shovellar activation sequence
Gaurav: Close enough.
Rhu: (to chickensuit) Excuse me!
Apheori (GM): Frezak: You smack it with a shovel.
It turns on and belches a bit and then goes all portally.
Bear Soup Guy: hard not to picture a nether portal at this point
Chickensuit: Yeaaah, what?
Rhu: That portal is broken.
The Gravedigger: I scienced it!
Rhu looks back to realise the portal has been turned on.
Rhu: Er.
It's still broken.
That is entirely the wrong colour.
We should call maintenance. Do you know how to call maintenance?
Chickensuit looks up.
Chickensuit: Yeah, so?
You're the wrong colour.
Rhu: That can't be helped.
Chickensuit: Yeeeaah.
Rhu: We should call maintenance. You should call maintenance. It's a broken portal, dammit! People's lives are at risk!
Liiiives!
Chickensuit: What's maintnents?
'Zzat.
Rhu: The people who fix these things.
Chickensuit: Things fix things.
Rhu: Wizards? Engineers?
Chickensuit: Fix folks.
Rhu: ... Things?
What sort of things?
Chickensuit: It's all... happening, man.
Chickensuit gestures grandly.
Rhu looks around
Rhu: Is it?
Chickensuit points up.
Chickensuit points up at the huge arch overhead, that is.
Rhu looks up
Chickensuit: It's gonna fall, man.
Rhu: ...
We didn't do that.
Bear Soup Guy: (aside, to Gravy) Am I as bad as that?
Chickensuit ambles over to Gravy.
Chickensuit: Hey, maaan.
Rhu: We didn't -- hey! Where are you going?
Chickensuit: Yeaaah.
Chickensuit pokes the open portal and scoots through it.
Radek leans over to Greibel, for lack of a less occupied person.
The Gravedigger: Nah, Greibel. You're cool.
Radek: If I shot him, do you think I could make a solid argument for him being game?
Ganelon: As in hunting.
Greibel: It's...certainly tempting to test it
Rhu looks after Chickensuit, then sighing heavily, tries the same routine on the next available stranger.
Apheori (GM): The next available stranger turns out to be a suspiciously blue woman. She seems to be very shiny and sparkling, and it isn't quite clear if it's a fancy outfit or her general species.
She stops and waits politely for whatever Rhu is going to say.
Rhu: Er, hi.
The portal is broken.
Blue woman: It is?
Rhu: We should call someone to fix it.
Blue woman looks to see which Rhu is referring to, then goes to examine it.
Gaurav: I hope you guys are trying alternatives, because I don't think this is going to work.
Blue woman: What seems to be broken?
Rhu: Erm .. the fuse. The fuse is definitely ... orange.
Ganelon: Whoa, whoa.
Rhu: Which it shouldn't be. See? Anyway.
Ganelon: Step aside, punk.
Blue woman: Is it?
Ellemerr: This blue woman is totally your GW character, isn't it.
Blue woman strokes the stone.
Frezak (GM): EW
Ganelon: Can I roll Arcana to babble in a convincingly scientific manner about how this portal is broken?
Frezak (GM): PERVERT
Apheori (GM): Maaaaybe.
Uh...
Sure?
Radek:
rolling 1d20+12
(
17
)
+12
=
29
Gaurav: whee! nice roll!
Apheori (GM): Radek emits a stream of technobabble, engaging the blue woman. She nods, and emits her own stream of strange jargonnystuff.
Ganelon: Oh, I love jargon battles.
Apheori (GM): Roll to continue jargon.
Gaurav: To the death! -- No! To the polysyllabic extremes!
extremis*
Ellemerr: ... Can I join this? O_O
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Ellemerr: Amadi will stop skulking and come up and be jargony. Do I use bluff for that?
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+12
(
11
)
+12
=
23
Ellemerr:
rolling 1d20 + 13
(
11
)
+13
=
24
Apheori (GM): Radek: You do more jargon. She starts to seem concerned, then looks to Amadi.
She offers a possible counter-jargon explanation, which seems uncomfortably plausible.
Do you continue?
Ellemerr: Yes!
rolling 1d20 + 13
(
2
)
+13
=
15
*sigh*
Bear Soup Guy: Jargon Simulator 2014
Gaurav: Now you're thinking with jargon!
Ganelon: Shall I also roll?
Blue woman shakes her head slowly and explains something jargonly of the nature of the portals, that they are not so much portals at all as just places where the planes connect. True portals are more... questionable or something. It doesn't make much sense.
Apheori (GM): Gan: Yes.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+12
(
12
)
+12
=
24
I need to roll a crit and have jargon spill out of my eyes.
Like the slips of paper from fortune cookies.
Apheori (GM): You manage to recover from the previous line (you're trying to convince her it's broken?), and she seems to be somewhat convinced.
Ganelon: Yes.
Apheori (GM): You can also roll to understand what she said about the portals.
Ganelon: I'm doing Rhu's job.
Also Arcana?
Apheori (GM): sURE, why not.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+12
(
18
)
+12
=
30
Wa-pow.
I dread my imminent failure.
Gaurav: Rhu's job is to talk to gods and godlings. Electronics are strictly your department, as evidenced by that fantastic roll there.
Apheori (GM): Gan: She seemed to be referring to a difference between planar portals, stable or otherwise, and holes. The more questionable holes can open up between anything, but often don't open up to anything.
Gaurav: ... did we just accidentally bump into exactly the person we've been looking for all this time?
Apheori (GM): Distinction between subspace and real space.
Subspace can go anywhere, or nowhere, real space overlaps and is more defined.
For mortals, subspace is not something to mess with without significant frameworking...
And for gods, it isn't something to mess with at all.
There was more, but this seems to be the general gist of non-rant.
Ganelon: Neat.
Gaurav: Rhu understood as far as "seemed"
Apheori (GM): Anyway, having convinced her that this portal is broken, she examines it more closely and then turns it off and then on.
Then she fiddles with it and makes it open up in different ways, perhaps to different places.
Gaurav: How does she turn it off and on without a control panel?
Ganelon: Presumably with magic.
Apheori (GM): Magic. Gestures.
Something.
Then one of the connections fails and it just dies.
Rhu: Aha! See? Broken.
Gaurav: Could Radek replicate that magic?
Blue woman: It isn't the portal that is broken, but the world.
It is dead, missing.
Ganelon: Good question.
Rhu: We didn't do it.
Blue woman jargons and babbles.
Radek: I'm looking to fix things.
Amadi: What world was it?
Apheori (GM): You can also arcana to jargon and babble.
Blue woman: Halora. Gone cannot be fixed.
Ellemerr: Any of us know anything about Halora?
Apheori (GM): Amadi might.
Radek: Don't be ridiculous. If something is missing, a replacement is in order.
Amadi looks sad.
(To Amadi): Halora was a pretty ordinary world. Lots of whales. Nobody really cared about it, but it was very peaceful and nice.
Amadi: Poor whales. They shall be missed.
Blue woman jargons about how that is quite impossible; you cannot replace what is gone from the universe, what never was.
Gaurav:
rolling 1d20+9 religion check on Halora
(
5
)
+9
=
14
Anybody good at history? I'm +4
Apheori (GM): Gaurav: The name reminds you of Halorien, whatever that is.
Do you know what that is? I don't.
Ganelon: Well, I'm probably better at History than that, but...
Gaurav: This woman is clearly an experienced jargon babbler.
It'll show up. These things always do.
Rhu is relieved that that last religion check didn't bring up awkward questions about Dave's absence from Hazz'ridan the Magnificent.
Radek: Just because we have no records of such a thing succeeding does not mean it can't be done!
It's no wonder the world's falling to pieces when everyone's so bloody /defeatist/ about it.
Blue woman: Just because something has happened does not mean it cannot be removed from history, forward or backward.
Defeatist? Nobody knows. Nobody notices. Some have only pieces, and others have nothing at all.
Amadi: I've fiddled with time, once. Except that wasn't me. It might have been more than once, too. I don't remember.
Radek: Pah. Time.
Rhu: We have many pieces. (wiggles skulls at Lady in Blue)
Radek: The only way I'm going to tamper with time is to generate more of it.
Gaurav: Can you fiddle with time "once"?
Ganelon: Imagine that.
A time generator!
It won't be free time but you can have it in excess!
Blue woman: Fiddling will be the only way to know. Step in and out, and you will remember what is lost, but you may also cause the loss. Such [jargon jargon babble jargon] .
Radek: In and out of where?
Apheori (GM): Rhu: She aknowleges the skull, but doesn't seem to see any significance.
Rhu: Gan: o.0
Blue woman: Out of the world, out of time.
Amadi: Go out at breakfast, come back at midnight. But it doesn't seem to be working.
Apheori (GM): (All jargon is open to deciphering with arcana.)
Ganelon: Sure, I'll try.
rolling 1d20+12
(
19
)
+12
=
31
...Man, I love Radek's skills.
Frezak (GM): I'm disgusted.
Apheori (GM): Radek: She was saying that holes are space/time issues, and moving freely throughout space and time without being very precise can result in instabilities that make the effects much worse
Blue woman: (a Amadi) Your eyes are for seeing. Stay in the world.
Amadi: Not go home? Not dream?
Rhu: (to Amadi) Did you say "midnight" or "Midnight"?
Amadi: I'm not sure.
Blue woman: Dreaming is dangerous now.
You as you will know more, but until then... [jargon]
Ellemerr: Can I roll for that jargon, too?
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Ellemerr:
rolling 1d20 + 10
(
15
)
+10
=
25
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+12
(
11
)
+12
=
23
Apheori (GM): The jargon is something about the fragments not knowing the whole, and a single wrong step destroying ecosystems, and various odd metaphors.
Ganelon: I'll do the same just so I don't feel left out.
Apheori (GM): Gan: She's saying Amadi needs to be remade before she can safely walk the universe, and for now she should be incredibly careful because she has great power but very little understanding of what she's actually doing.
Amadi probably figured that out too, but she won't want to hear that.
Ellemerr: No.
Ganelon: I could believe that.
Amadi looks upset and goes "But - Dreams!"
Ellemerr: It's a good excuse.
Blue woman: Dreams shape the worlds. Dreams can also destroy worlds.
Amadi: Well they seem to be destroyed anyway.
Blue woman looks very sad, somehow.
Blue woman: The dreams are all that remain holding them together, and yet the Dreamer lies broken, dead. But dreaming.
Amadi: You... seem to know me... us, Her... better than most.
Blue woman: You dream even now. You do not need to leave.
I know too much. She isn't mine to know, but she is there.
[jargon]
Ellemerr: Jargon roll:
rolling 1d20 + 10
(
9
)
+10
=
19
Apheori (GM): Something about dreams made stronger.
Gaurav: Can we bring the Blue Lady into the party somehow?
Apheori (GM): You could always try.
Amadi: Why? How?
Blue woman: You were born of a dream made Key. We were all born of something.
Amadi: Do I... know you...?
Ganelon: Kidnap her!
She knows things!
Blue woman: She did.
Gaurav: She does know things! And Radek can understand her!
Amadi: When?
Rhu will take out his giant ornamental key
Amadi: ... Midnight?
Blue woman jargons at Amadi.
Ellemerr: I'll roll some more!
rolling 1d20 + 10
(
18
)
+10
=
28
Gaurav: Nice jargoning!
Apheori (GM): She's referring to not just before the break and the whole keys thing, but before you (or she) even came to Arling To. Before the person you all had been died... the last time. The one time that was real.
Amadi: ... Oh. That's...
Amadi looks rather impressed.
Amadi: Who /are/ you?
Ganelon: Well that doesn't make much sense even if I do get it.
Apheori (GM): Oh, gods dammit.
She says she's the Apheori.
Gaurav: o.0
Ellemerr: *cackles*
Apheori (GM): ...it only just now occured to me that throwing in an Apheori would be confusing in light of my display name.
Oops.
Ellemerr: No, this is good.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Ellemerr: Do I remember her in any way at all?
Gaurav:
rolling 1d20+9 religion check on "Apheori"
(
8
)
+9
=
17
Ellemerr: Considering all the things that've happened and that I wasn't even remotely me at the time?
Apheori (GM): Not exactly. There were several of them, some more related to others.
Gaurav: It's an old and known name. Something that happens. Hazz runs into them infrequently, but in many different universes...
Amadi: Oh! It's nice to meet you. Er, again.
Gaurav: Do I know if Apheoris should be treated with awe, respect, or fear?
Apheori (GM): Nope!
Gaurav: Does Rhu know about Apheoris meeting mortals before? Like, are they usually wandering around doing things, or do they hang out with gods and do Big Deal things?
^-- I can rephrase that if it needs to make more sense
Apheori (GM): You don't know.
Rhu: (to Radek, whispered) ... I don't think kidnapping an Apheori would be wise.
Apheori (GM): The blue woman smacks the portal and the frame shatters.
Blue woman: Oh dear.
Radek: Hrmph.
Amadi: We're trying to do something about... something. Oh, and I'm looking for midnight. Can you help?
Blue woman: Do you know what?
Amadi: Probably not.
Blue woman jargons something about keys.
Amadi:
rolling 1d20 + 10
(
9
)
+10
=
19
Gaurav tries to come up with a way of explaining that if she doesn't help us, the nice man over there is going to create a Hole in a pocket universe.
Apheori (GM): It's something about using keys to close the universe.
Gaurav: I can't use "insight" to try to translate the jargon, can I?
Amadi: I have a key! I mean, I don't have it. I have a keeper! He's my keeper.
Amadi points at Greibel.
Amadi: Dawn doesn't have a key. I think. She thought? But I have a key.
Apheori (GM): You can use insight to do... something.
Rhu: Don't forget Ellia! (wiggles skull at Amadi)
Ellemerr: My insight is not great. :P
rolling 1d20 + 10
(
10
)
+10
=
20
Sorry
rolling 1d20 + 3
(
19
)
+3
=
22
That's what I wanted to... roll... huh.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+9 religion check "oh wise Hazz'ridan, keeper of all that ends, reader of the last page, master over point and prism ... you might want to listen to this lady."
(
19
)
+9
=
28
Apheori (GM): Your insight determines that she doesn't want to be here, and is just being polite.
Amadi: Oh, you found Ellia!
Rhu: Well, sort of.
Amadi: (to Apheori) Why are you here?
Apheori (GM): Rhu: Hazz tells you to listen to her and learn what you can, but don't antagonise her. Oh, and you really should find Dave.
Rhu sighs
Frezak (GM): SHe's clearly trying to trick us!
Blue Apheori: It doesn't concern you.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+4 arcana check to understand what Apheori was saying about keys.
(
13
)
+4
=
17
Amadi: Oh. Are you sure?
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You need more keys. Or something.
Radek stares longingly at his rope. "...Soon."
Gaurav: Frezak: It makes a nice change from people approaching us for drugs though.
Blue Apheori: I am sure. My business is my own; for now I am only passing through.
Frezak (GM): At least we get reps!
Gaurav: Radek: I kind of thought you'd been fooling with the rope all this time!
Apheori (GM): I want an explosion.
Gaurav: A universe-shattering kaboom.
Apheori (GM): I'm out of coffee.
Rhu: (to Apheori) As are we! Where are you headed?
Ganelon: Well, it would be difficult to listen in on this from inside the pocket dimension.
Which is where he would likely need to be to make a hole.
Blue Apheori: Forward and on. It doesn't matter.
Rhu: That's where we're headed! We should join forces. There's another ... god ... person you should meet, once she's done flying with dragons.
Blue Apheori: I need to go to the bathroom, and figure out where to go. I'll be back in a bit.
Er, ooc.
Apheori (GM): OTHER APHEORI OUT FOR A MOMENT.
Ellemerr: Oh, I was sure that was IC. It made perfect sense.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Ganelon: So!
Mysterious blue lady.
Apheori (GM): The Apheori seems interested in the dragons.
Ganelon: Would she like a dead one?
Blue Apheori: Go on.
Radek: Well, we had to evict a dragon or three from this pocket dimension I recently acquired.
And one had to be shot and decapitated, you see.
This lot was going to make sandwiches from its remains.
Blue Apheori: Delicious.
Radek: Go ahead and join them, if you like.
Amadi: I'm really good with sandwiches.
Blue Apheori: Are you offering the remains?
After the sandwiches.
Or are you offering the sandwiches?
Radek: The remains. Ask Gravy if you want the sandwiches.
Ellemerr: I guess I'll make sandwiches.
Radek thumbs towards Gravy.
Ellemerr: I'm pretty sure I have bread and salad in my... pockets.
Apheori (GM): You can roll something cookingly to make sandwiches, but you'll need to get dragon meat...
Ganelon: I'm pretty sure bread and salad would be in your pockets, or even just full-blown precooked dragon sandwiches, if you imagined it to be so.
Frezak (GM): I'm pretty sure I have expertise in Sandwiches.
Gravy makes sandwiches because he doesn't eat future food.
Apheori (GM): Doooo it.
Blue Apheori confronts Gravy.
Blue Apheori: Sandwiches?
Frezak (GM): I have no idea what that skill would be.
Ellemerr: I'd like to team up with Gravy to cook. It'll be a fun diversion from just pulling finished food out of thin air.
The Gravedigger nods gravely.
The Gravedigger: Sandwiches.
Apheori (GM): Use dungeoneering, arcana, or nature.
Whichever you feel like.
To roll to make sandwiches.
Frezak (GM): Nature!
rolling 1D20+10
(
8
)
+10
=
18
Ellemerr: Magic!
rolling 1d20 + 10
(
10
)
+10
=
20
Gaurav: Arcane sandwiches?
Frezak (GM): Hmm.
Ganelon: I'll deploy the rope.
Apheori (GM): You make a sandwich!
Amadi is having so much fun with this.
Frezak (GM): Skillz
Apheori (GM): Assuming you have dragon meat. But let's assume you do.
Frezak (GM): Gravy Performs Zen Sandichery
Apheori (GM): What do you do with the sandwich?
Ganelon: They're permitted full access to my pocket dimension and the headless dragon corpse within.
Frezak (GM): Harversting resources!
Like some MMO
Apheori (GM): So what do you do?
Ellemerr: I'd like to give it to Apheori.
Apheori (GM): The Apheori watches curiously.
Ellemerr: But if Gravy wants to do something else, *shrug*
Ganelon: Do we have a decent way to cook meat?
Frezak (GM): I will continue to fabricate lunches
Apheori (GM): You have magic!
Frezak (GM): FIREBIRD
Ganelon: The best I've got is Alchemist's fire.
Apheori (GM): And nature.
Ganelon: I've no fire magic, nor Presti.
Apheori (GM): ...they did SOMETHING.
Okay, so Amadi gives the sandwich to the Apheori. Does she then help make more?
Gaurav: Cold dragon sandwiches.
Ellemerr: Yes.
This sandwiching is fun.
Apheori (GM): The Apheori tries the sandwich carefully. It seems like a very detailed process for her, examining and tasting every aspect of it.
...and you make more sandwiches.
Blue Apheori: Very nice. It is not poison.
Apheori (GM): Guys, roll to make more.
Just to be sure.
>.>
Ellemerr:
rolling 1d20 + 10
(
15
)
+10
=
25
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+10
(
19
)
+10
=
29
Gaurav will check up on the giant
Frezak (GM): Fuck yeah
Apheori (GM): Yeah, the others succeed without issue.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+12 heal check to check on the giant
(
12
)
+12
=
24
Ellemerr: These are very good sandwiches.
Gaurav: What does dragon taste like?
Blue Apheori: Do you offer the remainder of the dragon?
Apheori (GM): Try it and see.
Amadi: I don't think we need it. Dawn has more. They're alive, though.
Apheori (GM): The giant really out of it.
Gaurav: Are there any extra sandwiches?
Apheori (GM): They made a bunch.
Details are up to them.
Amadi joyfully hands out sandwiches to everyone, including random passersby.
Rhu sniffs suspiciously at one, then takes a tiny bite
Apheori (GM): It's oddly spicy and has a strong hearty flavour.
Rhu: Oh, yum! Where did you get horseradish mayonnaise from?
Ganelon: I suppose these were the firebreathing sort of dragon, yes?
Apheori (GM): Yes.
The Gravedigger: Trade secret.
Ganelon: Might I be able to salvage some of that fire-stuff?
Or is it magical rather than chemical?
Authorities differ greatly.
Apheori (GM): You can salvage it.
Chemical stuff is magical, far as I'm concerned.
It's just different sorts of magic.
Ganelon: Chemists tend to have their heads on straighter than wizards.
Apheori (GM): Well, they deal with more kinds of magic and have to understand the distinctions.
So I should hope they would.
Gaurav: ... but then a hydra with seventeen partially decapitated heads has them on straighter than wizards, so.
Apheori (GM): o.O
Alright, so what do you need from me to salvage? I forget how it works.
Ganelon: Okay, uh... I need two details in this case.
Is this level 2 or level 7 Alchemist's Fire? (Basically determines potency), and how many grenade-y objects can I fill like this?
Bottles qualify as grenade-y.
Apheori (GM): Seven, and... uh... 8?
Ganelon: Cool.
Apheori (GM): The Apheori is waiting for you to finish with it.
Ganelon: There are no rules on how long harvesting takes.
So that's all up to you.
Rhu: (to the Apheori) Do you know how these Holes in the universe are formed?
Apheori (GM): Well, you just need to indicate when you're done and she can... take it. Or start bartering or something. I don't know.
Ganelon: I will do so as soon as I am actually done.
And does she want that or just the... bones, skin, whatever else?
Rhu: We're trying to figure that out. We could probably give you some of our dragon if you can help us ... make a Hole in a pocket universe.
Blue Apheori: You may as well ask how the universes themselves are formed.
Rhu: Ah.
Blue Apheori: You wish to make a hole?
Why?
Rhu: Um ...
Rhu gestures to Radek
Radek: To discover how to close it.
Apheori (GM): She seems to want everything, but asking may help.
Blue Apheori: How?
Radek: I can't answer that until I have a hole to study. Keeping one in an enclosed space is simply the safest and most convenient method available to me
Blue Apheori: Oh.
Go on, then.
Radek waggles one of his napalm thingies.
Radek: What do you mean to do with these?
You're welcome to the rest of the corpse, but I might have a use for them.
Blue Apheori: Then I will take the rest.
Radek: By all means
Blue Apheori does a thing and the rest of the dragon goes all glowy and disappears.
Rhu: o.0
Radek: Huh. Convenient.
Blue Apheori: How can I help?
Ganelon: Might I be able to babble some jargon at her about my theories on dangerous intentional hole-creation?
Gathered from the observation of incompetent wizards?
Blue Apheori: Do it.
Roll jargon.
Apheori (GM): Dammit, ooc.
Radek:
rolling 1d20+12
(
20
)
+12
=
32
Ganelon: Haha!
Gaurav: WOAH
Ganelon: JARGON SPILLS FROM ME EYE-HOLES
Gaurav: Radek recites his theories in rhyming couplets
Apheori (GM): FOOOD.
Ganelon: I love this new use of Arcana.
Apheori (GM): Also JARGON JARGON JARGON.
Okay. You jargon at the blue Apheori about your theories about misdone magic and stuff. She jargons back with more stuff about the precise sorts that might lead to it, and proposes a particular sort of possible spell, if it helps.
Ganelon: Certainly worth trying!
Gaurav: Are there any nearby walls to hide behind?
Ganelon: Just be outside the rope-hole.
A wall between worlds is the thickest of all.
Apheori (GM): You could go around a street corner.
There's also a chunk of shattered portal frame sticking out of the ground.
Rhu hides behind the giant
Gaurav: Well, crouches
Ganelon: I assume nobody is super keen on sitting in the pocket dimension while I break things.
Apheori (GM): Probably.
Do you enter it?
Ganelon: I do!
I will want... some kind of way out.
Apheori (GM): Folks can peer in. The Apheori does.
Rope? Grapping onto someone?
Ellemerr: I might as well.
Ganelon: A rope would be nice.
Of the "loop for your foot" sort.
Gaurav: You should get Gravy to hold the other end for you, he's the strongest person here. Usually.
Ganelon: I'm sure that all of you working together could manage.
Frezak (GM): Usually?
He's genrally really bad at strength rolls.
Well you could tie around Gravy.
Like a bollard.
Rhu gets out from behind the giant and holds on to the rope, ready to pull Radek back out if necessary.
Ganelon: Alright, well, time for the moment of truth.
Time to fuck up!
How should I do this, mechanically?
Apheori (GM): Hmm.
I guess you just cast the spell. Is there anything for casting strange new spells?
Ganelon: Not really.
rolling 1d20+12
(
1
)
+12
=
13
Whoo!
Is that good or bad?
Apheori (GM): Uh... yes.
Ellemerr: If you were supposed to fail... you did do that!
Gaurav: YES!
Ganelon: I don't know if I failed at failing or what.
Frezak (GM): You're so good at failing
Apheori (GM): The spell fails and explodes...
Ganelon: Yeeeeesss?
Apheori (GM): Uh... I'm thinking.
Ganelon leans forward expectantly.
Apheori (GM): First off... is anyone not peering in or holding onto the rope?
Gaurav: Greibel? The Giant?
Amadi?
Apheori (GM): Greibel: What are you doing?
Amadi is peering it.
in*
Frezak (GM): I'm on rope-duty.
No peering into the Far Realm for me.
Apheori (GM): I'll just say Greibel is with you, since it looks like Rob isn't paying attention at the moment.
Okay. The spell fails catastrophically as planned, and explodes. The pocket dimension explodes, and expands horrible. Radek doesn't explode, but suddenly he's not all there either.
Radek, Amadi: d20s
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
12
)
=
12
Ellemerr:
rolling 1d20
(
4
)
=
4
Ganelon: In case it's relevant, I should mention that I do have that shielding thing.
I don't expect it to protect me, but you would know.
Apheori (GM): Radek: You get the feeling that you're everywhere at once all of a sudden. You see a whole lot of worlds, as well as a hell of a lot more nothing.
Amadi: You get the feeling Radek has just destroyed the universe. Again. And you had so much trouble cleaning up after the LAST time...
Rope duty: There's a weird tension on the rope, but it also feels rather weightless.
Ganelon: Whoa, whoa.
I think I would know if I was responsible for the first destruction of the universe.
Apheori (GM): Also the golden Arah light goes a funny orange colour.
Gan: Wasn't you.
Ganelon: Okay, good.
Apheori (GM): As far as I know.
Ganelon: I would probably speak with more authority on the subject if I had.
Apheori (GM): Aye.
Gaurav: Does the tension on the rope feel like Radek is still on it?
Apheori (GM): Yes. Maybe?
d20!
Rhu: (looking at the suddenly changing light) Err ...
rolling d20
(
2
)
=
2
Apheori (GM): Radek: Arcana to learn stuff.
Ganelon: Fantastic.
rolling 1d20+12
(
4
)
+12
=
16
Frezak (GM): Radio check?
Apheori (GM): Rhu: PANIC.
Ganelon: Aw, my luck really did run out.
Apheori (GM): Gan: You learn some, but not very much.
Ganelon: Damn.
Apheori (GM): Radio?
Whatcha doing?
Ganelon: Trying to hail me via radio, I think.
Frezak (GM): Our megaradios
Yarr
That
Rhu suddenly feels very, very uneasy
Apheori (GM): It works. You can chatter.
Rhu: We should pull him back. Something's happened. Something's not right.
The Gravedigger: Horns to Grumps. What's your situation, over.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+2 strength check to start pulling Radek back
(
14
)
+2
=
16
We don't have much time!
Radek: I can see... entire worlds.
Gaurav: Those are the best code names ever.
The Gravedigger: What's wrong, Rhu?
Rhu: Radek ... I ... he ...
The Gravedigger: That sounds like crazy talk, Radek.
And not the usual crazy talk.
Say something Radekian.
Radek: Shut up and listen.
The Gravedigger: That'll do.
Radek: I think the spell worked. I'm looking at the universe from the outside.
It's a confusing mess.
Gaurav: Is my rope-pulling having any effect?
Amadi: It's ruined!
Bloody ruined!
Radek: Does it look like I can be extracted from your end?
Apheori (GM): Pulling is having some effect, but not much.
Gravy?
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+6
(
8
)
+6
=
14
Apheori (GM): The blue Apheori looks in, then looks at the others and shakes her head.
Frezak (GM): Strength.
SEEEEE
Gaurav: Perfect. Rhu will expend as much panicky nervous energy into pulling on the rope as he can.
Radek: What does the hole look like?
Amadi turns to the Apheori, looking very upset.
Amadi: He bloody ruined it!
Apheori (GM): Okay, you guys start pulling Radek out.
Blue Apheori: It's not over.
Amadi looks very concerned.
Rhu: It's not working! He's still in there! We have to get him out, Gravy! We have to get him out! (keeps pulling)
(To Rhu): You idiots.
Gaurav: Please tell me that means I get to re-roll that sanity check.
Ganelon: Out of curiosity, can I look at where my rope exit is going?
Apheori (GM): Go for it.
Gaurav:
rolling d20
(
18
)
=
18
Apheori (GM): Gan: Your rope exit seems to be getting further away.
Gaurav: You come to your senses a bit, then. But of course there is the issue of a displeased Hazz, but how to handle that is of course entirely up to you.
Rhu stops pulling the rope, and looks around him, confused.
Rhu: Sorry, what did you say?
(to nobody in particular)
Apheori (GM): (no response from the Hazz)
Gan! What do you do?
Ganelon: What can I do?
Apheori (GM): I don't know.
Ganelon: I've got... explosives.
And bullets.
And magic.
Apheori (GM): You could try using one of those.
Ganelon: And virtually no ability to climb a rope.
Apheori (GM): But you can tell them to pull you out.
Ganelon: I guess I'll see if I can't use Arcana to put things back together.
That too, yeah. That's probably wise.
Apheori (GM): Roll arcana!
Radek:
rolling 1d20+12
(
19
)
+12
=
31
Gaurav: Too bad the one PC who has wings isn't around atm >.<
Ellemerr: Do you want me to stop complaining about the mess and start flying?
Ganelon: Yeah, wings are pretty optional to flight, really.
Gaurav: ^ ooo, good point
Ellemerr: I might have to couple it with juggling geese.
Gaurav: Let's see if Radek can figure his way out first? Although I would feel a lot better if there was a godling in there with him.
his own way*
Ganelon: He can do anything! He's a genius!
Except his fate is ultimately out of his own hands and that kinda sucks.
Gaurav: A universe-destroying genius.
Apheori (GM): Radek: You start throwing magic and crap around, putting some of the... pocket universal hole back together a bit. In the process, you begin to understand a thing or two about the nature of holes, but also because you are inside, it is a very different process than it might have been otherwise.
Ganelon: Well, I can appreciate that.
Is it helping my whole "might be trapped Outside forever" situation, though?
Radek: Fascinating, really... hey, Gravy, are you all lowering me down back there?
Frezak (GM): Lowering?
Ganelon: From his perspective, the exit's getting further away.
And I presume there's no floor to act as a reference point otherwise.
Frezak (GM): Are we still pulling?
Ganelon: To my knowledge, yes.
The Gravedigger: Nope, still pulling back here.
Apheori (GM): Gan: It's sort of helping.
Gaurav: Rhu is going to follow Gravy's lead on the pulling now that he's sane-ish again.
Apheori (GM): Greibel is pulling too, for lack of any BSG input.
Ganelon: A pity, that.
Apheori (GM): Quite.
He'd see things.
Ganelon: Well, I'm going to keep trying to make things better.
Apheori (GM): Arcana!
Ganelon: Because my second idea is rocket-jump to the exit and that just seems kind of reckless even for me.
Apheori (GM): Rhu, gravy: Strength!
Amadi: Do something!
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+12
(
5
)
+12
=
17
Ellemerr: Can I help with the arcaning?
Ganelon: That might be nice.
Apheori (GM): Nope. Too far away. Unless you dive in first.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+6
(
2
)
+6
=
8
Gorram
Blue Apheori does some arcane stuff on the outside.
Frezak (GM): noodlearm gravy
Ellemerr: I can go in and yell at him for wrecking the universe and help with the arcaning?
Gaurav:
rolling 1d20+2 strength check
(
5
)
+2
=
7
eep
Rocket jump!
Ellemerr: Actually, I will do that. Call it "operation clean-up".
I might hold on to the rope.
rolling 1d20 + 10
(
19
)
+10
=
29
Blue Apheori doesn't really achieve a whole lot and looks annoyed.
Ellemerr: That is arcana on the inside.
Apheori (GM): Amadi descends into the pocket of abyss in a horrible deluge of colour.
The pocket begins to stabilise again.
Sort of.
You guys are gathering the hole back into one place. One singular hole. As opposed to a massive everywhere hole.
Radek: You see fewer worlds and stuff.
Amadi: You see a lot of everything, and so much colour.
Apheori (GM): Radek: You see some of the colour.
Radek: Oh, hello Amadi.
Amadi: You're just ruining everything and I /hate/ cleaning up!
Radek: Well, I'm already putting it back together.
Amadi is distracted by pretty colours.
Radek: You saw everything break the first time, didn't you? Was this what it looked like back then, too?
Ellemerr: Do I require extra DM knowledge to answer that question?
Ganelon: When all else fails, speak nonsense.
Ellemerr: I know.
Amadi: Well, /that/ green wasn't there before... But that orange was.
Ganelon: So what does the colour mean?
Apheori (GM): Sorry, got distracted by conference.
Ganelon: No prob.
Ellemerr: I might have to brb
(To Amadi): The first time it didn't look like anything. Everything just fell completely to pieces without anyone noticing, and then there was nothing left, only Midnight and a deck of cards. And some folks. Sitting in Midnight. With the deck of cards.
Apheori (GM): What DOES the colour mean? Excellent question.
Ganelon: Things bleeding into the visible spectrum generally means... stuff.
But I don't know if I can roll to figure out what.
Apheori (GM): It means things are screwy, but you don't know why. You can roll arcana to try to make sense of it.
But this will take an extra moment...
Ganelon: Hah!
As if I would ever weigh my own survival against the value of knowledge!
rolling 1d20+12 Arcana
(
14
)
+12
=
26
KNOWLEDGE!
Frezak (GM): Understanding!
Apheori (GM): It's bleeding from Arah. It's a magic of sorts that isn't even entirely magic, just a sort of background noise of the universe...
But you don't know what it does or why it's visible.
Ganelon: Okay, let's continue my unintentional descent into this awful abyss.
What happened when those guys fucked up their strength rolls?
Apheori (GM): They failed to pull you out.
It's like the rope is just stuck to them.
Ganelon: Ah, okay.
Apheori (GM): Sorry, I think I forgot.
Ganelon: 'Twas but a single step.
Gaurav: I think we're also distracted by the changing lights and things
at least, Rhu is
Apheori (GM): Things are going REEEEEED.
Ganelon: Well, I'll give those guys another report while I'm waiting for more stuff.
Frezak (GM): Like jam!
Apheori (GM): You have an Amadi hanging above you, probably Elaine Marley style.
Gaurav: Jam-red or blood-red? The important questions.
Frezak (GM): "And then you died?"
"... yes."
Radek: There's residual... er, "magic" bleeding in from Arah into the visible spectrum. I say magic for your benefit, but this is different from what I'm used to.
Apheori (GM): Uh... red.
Radek: ...And it's turning red.
Ganelon: This being into the radio.
Apheori (GM): The red is mostly Arah itself. You're seeing a much fuller spectrum.
Though... that might be going red too...
Er.
Yes.
Ganelon: I don't think that's... good.
Apheori (GM): I don't think so either.
Ganelon: Well, I still need to get out of here.
I'd rather not watch the universe bleed together.
Apheori (GM): The apheori tries something on the outside again, but it also doesn't acheive anything.
Radek: You have arcana and an Amadi. And no response from the radio. What do you do?
Ganelon: Keep fixing things!
It's what I do. Breaking and fixing.
Apheori (GM): Arcana!
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+12
(
12
)
+12
=
24
Apheori (GM): Is Ellemerr still there?
Gaurav: she said she "might have to brb"
Apheori (GM): Hence my asking.
Okay, let's just assume Amadi helps Radek.
Gaurav: Perception!
Gravy too.
Radek! You make some progress, or at least don't make anything worse.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+14 perception check
(
14
)
+14
=
28
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+12
(
8
)
+12
=
20
Rhu: +12? That's not Gravyvision!
Apheori (GM): You guys notice weirdness. The light is all reddish. It seems like the Apheori is moving really quickly.
Rhu: Or is it?
Frezak (GM): I don't know if I want to gravision the sundering of worlds
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You also notice that the light is only reddish further away. Right where you are, and especially closer to the rope and Apheori, it's fairly normal.
Gaurav: Frezak: in a few minutes, that might be all you could do :-/
Ellemerr: I'm back. I want to help.
Gaurav: Is the reddishness in any particular direction, or just all around outside this little circle we've got going on?
Apheori (GM): Ellemerr: You and Radek are hanging from a rope or something in a slightly broken pocket dimension. There is a massive hole slightly off to the side, but it isn't entirely cohesive, and is wreaking havok on... stuff and things. Would you like to panic?
Gaurav: All around.
The redder the further away.
Gaurav: ... that's not a red-shift, is it? Br.
Frezak (GM): Sounds great!
Like being inside a toaster!
Apheori (GM): Maybe.
Gaurav: Ellemerr: I would strongly advocate panicking.
Ganelon: Is this the hole that used to be everywhere?
Which we're kind of fixing?
Ellemerr: I dunno. Can I juggle geese?
Apheori (GM): Yes.
And... yes.
Ganelon: Well, the alternative is climbing the rope and I have more faith in Radek's ability to fix the universe through magic than I do in his ability to shimmy up a rope.
Ellemerr: I'll do that in an attempt to avoid panics.
Ganelon: At the same time, though.
Radek: (Radio) I could really use an extraction here, gents.
Ganelon: Well, make that an exclamation.
Amadi shouts in no particular direction, "And heave, ye lubbers!"
Ganelon: He's not just calmly intoning it.
Frezak (GM): Heaaaaaave!
Apheori (GM): Rhu, Gravy: You can't actually understand him.
Frezak (GM): Aw
Apheori (GM): It's coming out all... funny.
Frezak (GM): Sounds like a great reason to pull the grump out the spacetime rend
Apheori (GM): High-pitched-like.
Frezak (GM): Eeeeextract meeeeeee
Apheori (GM): And short.
Strength checks!
Gaurav: Given how weird everything is getting, and that Apheori seems to be trying to do something, we're probably pulling as hard as we can anyway.
rolling 1d20+2 strength check
(
1
)
+2
=
3
... but not necessarily in the right direction
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 for Greibel
(
19
)
=
19
Rhu falls down.
Rhu: Oof.
Ellemerr: Can I do more cleanuping?
Ganelon: Likewise.
More rolls, more developments!
Please don't banish Radek to nowhere when he's finally learned something useful!
Apheori (GM): Roll!
Ellemerr:
rolling 1d20 + 10
(
12
)
+10
=
22
Frezak (GM): Strength again!
This time for REALS
rolling 1D20+6
(
6
)
+6
=
12
Okay.
So.
Gravy is apparently as physically powerful as Radek
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+9 religion check
(
20
)
+9
=
29
Apheori (GM): Greibel and Gravy pull! It's like really stuck.
Rhu: oo err
Ganelon: I hope our fixing shit isn't making this harder for them.
Apheori (GM): Radek: Roll to fix.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+12
(
9
)
+12
=
21
Noooo! HIGHER.
Apheori (GM): Okay, you two make some more progress, though it seems to be getting harder.
Rhu: any response from Hazz?
Gaurav: sorry ooc
Apheori (GM): Yes. Oh, yeeess.
Radek: (To Amadi) Well, no answer on the radio. How do you feel about just popping us both out of here if the exit closes?
Apheori (GM): Sorry, guy's talking about spam and I'm distracted again.
But soon as I'm not distracted...
Gaurav: np!
Amadi: You want to be... popped?
Amadi produces soap-bubbles.
Frezak (GM): You fool.
YOU SIMPLE FOOL
Radek: Er, no. Teleported. Spatially displaced.
To a safe location.
Safely.
Amadi: Oh.
Amadi looks bored.
Apheori (GM): Y'all outside the pocket see a massive shrouded tentacle monster appear beside the rope opening.
Gaurav: WELL
Frezak (GM): SHub-Niggurath!
Gaurav: shrouded?
Ganelon: Reminiscent of the one that got Rhu?
Frezak (GM): Goat of a Thousand Young!
Apheori (GM): SHROUDED.
Ellemerr: How do you shroud a tentacle monster?
Gaurav: does the shroud go over the tentacles?
(To Rhu): It's Hazz. You know it's Hazz. Well, an avatar - not all of Hazz. But Hazz.
Gaurav: Oh, I know.
Apheori (GM): It has tentacles. And a shroud.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+9 religion check in thanks
(
19
)
+9
=
28
Rhu remains sitting, praying furiously
(From Ellemerr): Can I pop Radek out? I... would sort of imagine that would include going through my Realm. And while that might be preferable to just... getting eaten by the hole-stuff... (I mean, it was preferable last time that was about to happen to someone) I dunno. >.>
(To Ellemerr): You know, I don't know.
(To Ellemerr): Because things are a mite... strange...
Ganelon: Maybe I will just resign myself to being popped.
Apheori (GM): The shrouded tentacle monster sort of looms.
Ellemerr: I'm not popping you just yet.
Apheori (GM): Things outside the pocket start getting more normal.
You guys can try pulling again.
Ellemerr: And magic?
Frezak (GM): Because eventually I can roll a 20
rolling 1D20+6
(
8
)
+6
=
14
Apheori (GM): Amadi and Radek: The hole is resisting less. The magic is not decomposing anymore.
rolling 1d20 for Greibel
(
6
)
=
6
That's enough to pull again. It's no longer stuck.
Ellemerr: I'll waggle a goose at the hole.
Apheori (GM): Radek and Amadi: You're hanging in midair! Arcana?
Ellemerr: Sure!
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+12
(
3
)
+12
=
15
Ellemerr:
rolling 1d20 + 10
(
19
)
+10
=
29
Ganelon: Wait, midair where?
Also, fuck!
Apheori (GM): In the pocket dimension.
Ganelon: It's happening again!
Damned probability!
Apheori (GM): From the rope.
Ellemerr: Well, I'm still capable. It seems. And I'm here solely to help you. Which is very odd.
Apheori (GM): Okay! It's closing and becoming contained!
Amadi covers for you!
Again!
Ellemerr: Go me!
Apheori (GM): I mean, do it again.
Ellemerr:
rolling 1d20 + 10
(
18
)
+10
=
28
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+12
(
19
)
+12
=
31
Gaurav: yay!
Apheori (GM): The hole doesn't actually close, but you manage to get it stabilised. It is no longer doing horrible things to the pocket dimension, though the colours remain as they were.
Ganelon: Good enough!
We have a stable Hole inside a hole!
Apheori (GM): Yup.
Gaurav: We blew a hole in a universe and patched it up! That's got to be good for some XP.
Apheori (GM): You totally get some experience.
Ganelon: Pah, I got getter than just XP.
Better, even.
Frezak (GM): Validation!
Ganelon: I got to learn something!
Frezak (GM): THEY SAID I WAS MAS
*mad
THEY WERE RIGHT!
Ganelon: THEY WERE RIGHT, BUT SO WAS I
Apheori (GM): Also Hazz is still there, and the light is still a bit odd, but much more consistently so.
Ganelon: SO HAHA, BITCHES
Apheori (GM): Random passersby are moving again.
They all kind of... stopped before.
Ganelon: Can we get out of here, now? Like, out of the hole?
Apheori (GM): Yeah, the other folks pull you out.
Frezak (GM): So this was Draongball Z minute that lasts hours?
Apheori (GM): No idea.
Gaurav: Yay!
on the pulling Radek and Amadi out
Ellemerr: Yay indeed!
Gaurav: What is the shrouded tentacle monster doing? How far away is it?
Frezak (GM): Reading Weightwatchers
Radek leaps off the rope energetically.
Radek: Hahahaha! Good job, all of you!
Apheori (GM): It was an episode of stargate.
Amadi floats out of the hole and continues juggling geese. Both she and the geese appear to be weightless.
The Gravedigger: Oh dear.
Apheori (GM): It's just there. Not doing anything. Disturbing passerby.
The Gravedigger: Oh, dear, deary dear.
Radek is smiling.
Gaurav: "Disturbing passerby" hahahahha
"Excuse me, but have you heard the Good News about Me?"
Radek is _laughing_
creepy
Apheori (GM): Passerby don't like a giant tentacle monster, even in Arah.
Radek points at his face.
Radek: You see this? This is what progress looks like!
The Gravedigger: Wrinkly?
Radek: And none of that hogwash you hear from psychiatrists, either!
Rhu: (to Greibel) Did you give him any of your stuff?
Blue Apheori: It's a step. It looks like the hole is still there, however. Will you be able to close it?
Blue Apheori bows to the tentacle monster.
Blue Apheori then focuses on Radek.
Blue Apheori: (And that was all said at him)
Radek: I don't know yet, but it's there! And patching things up from the /inside/ was very informative.
The Gravedigger: I hope you had more fun closing a Hole than I did.
Ganelon: Evidently.
Rhu makes sure Radek is alright, laughter and smiling notwithstanding, and then approaches the tentacle monster.
Radek bundles up his rope.
Frezak (GM): If I was a rogue I'd be making Sneak Attack on the thing that's not Radek
That's not our Grump!
Radek: In any case, it's been contained and rendered safe for transportation.
The Gravedigger: So what /did/ you learn?
Ganelon: Oh man.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+9 religion check; Rhu prays to Hazz' in thanksgiving for Radek and Amadi's return
(
11
)
+9
=
20
Ganelon: I use Arcana to babble my knowledge at Gravy.
Rhu: (to Hazz'ridan) My Lord ...
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+12
(
16
)
+12
=
28
Blue Apheori nods in a satisfied fashion, bids everyone goodbye, and skulks away.
Blue Apheori: (but quietly, so they don't necessarily notice)
Amadi shouts after the Apheori:
Amadi: It was nice meeting you! Maybe we'll meet again some day!
Apheori (GM): Gravy! Arcana!
Frezak (GM): Really?
Gaurav: We're going to regret not kidnapping her, aren't we.
Rhu ain't noticing anything that isn't a giant tentacle monster.
Blue Apheori: (to Amadi) I trust we will.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+3
(
1
)
+3
=
4
SEEEEEE
Amadi: Maybe I won't be me or I'll have forgotten you but I'm looking forwards to it!
Apheori (GM): Gravy has no idea what Radek just said.
Hazz'ridan: My loyal servant. You have done well.
Gaurav: Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay
Rhu bows before Hazz'ridan
Radek: ...
Radek snaps his fingers at Gravy.
Radek: Hello? Anyone in there?
The Gravedigger shrugs.
The Gravedigger: Not a scienceman.
Hazz'ridan: Guard the scienceman. He will be your beacon.
Radek: I can't even hate you for saying that right now. It's so nice having less-than-useless assistants.
Ellemerr: Is Hazz actually here?!
Gaurav: Can everybody hear Hazz'?
Apheori (GM): Yes.
And yes.
Ellemerr: CAN I PUNCH HIM ON THE NOSE?
Apheori (GM): Well, an avatar is here.
Yes.
Ellemerr: I do that.
Hazz'ridan: Radek.
Your understanding will bring you to your goal, an end to begin the worlds anew. Good-
Amadi flips out of her weightlessness and crashes her fist into Hazz's avatar's nose.
Apheori (GM): Hazz is interrupted by Amadi suddenly scooting over and punching him in the nose, or some rough equivalent,
.
Yes.
Rhu: Um.
Ganelon: I'm just going to take a moment to declare that I like this campaign and this has been one of the best sessions in a while.
Drama! Suspense! Hazz getting bopped on the nose!
Amadi turns, smiling, to Radek.
Amadi: Yeah, you were pretty great.
Ganelon: Couldn't ask for more.
Radek: I...
Appreciate your help.
Ellemerr: If Hazz tries speaking again she'll put her foot in his mouth and go "Shut up." She might have to jump up and stand in the air to accomplish this.
Ganelon: (He says, with considerable difficulty)
Frezak (GM): Gravy would lift her.
Amadi: I helped? I helped!
Hazz'ridan vanishes.
Amadi beams.
Radek: Yes. You helped.
Rhu bows before the space previously occupied by a tentacle monster with a bopped nose
(To Rhu): Radek has earned my blessing. His actions far outweigh his distaste for gods.
Ellemerr: I think I should use this most wonderful of moments to go to bed.
(To Amadi): Don't do that.
Ganelon: It's a pretty great conclusion, though... I'll do one thing that Frezak's been bugging me about for a while now.
Apheori (GM): Yup.
Rhu: Huh. Really
(From Amadi): Well don't be an annoying prick!
(To Amadi): You're one to talk.
Rhu: Radek: Hazz'ridan thanks you and gives you his blessing. He says that your actions far outweigh your distaste for gods.
(From Amadi): hey! I was helpful! He just said that I was helpful! I'm totally helpful!
(To Amadi): punching people is not helpful.
(From Amadi): Depends on the people. I'm not sure you qualify as people, anyhoo.
Radek puts up a hand.
Radek: Don't care. I'm feeling charitable; who wants a better weapon?
Or armor, really. Magical reinforcement.
Amadi ponders, to herself, "Then again, I'm not sure I qualify, either."
(To Amadi): Nor should you.
The Gravedigger waves hands.
The Gravedigger: Oooo, ooo, oooo.
The Gravedigger hops up and down.
The Gravedigger: Me!
Radek points at Gravy.
Radek: Yes, you. Gravedigger.
The Gravedigger nudges Rhu.
The Gravedigger: He picked me!
Apheori (GM): Also y'all can level up after this if you want.
Ganelon: Part of me feels sorry for blowing Rhu's god-talk off.
But it just felt right for Radek to do.
Gaurav: HA
Apheori (GM): Hazz expected nothing less.
Gaurav: I think Hazz' admires your atheistic bent
a strange habit for a god, but he's an odd'un
Ellemerr: Amadi liked it, too. So you got people happy all around. Hazz, Amadi, Gravy...
Gaurav: Blue Apheori also didn't seem displeased, which is good, as we might need an angel at some point.
(To Gaurav): I think he just told Rhu that to make sure Rhu knows Radek is 'good'. And crap.
Frezak (GM): Sooo... What level?
Ganelon: Well, I assume we'd just level once. To 5.
Apheori (GM): Aye. And I've nothing left to throw at you, so details of the items made is up to you.
Ellemerr: Sleep!
Ganelon: Oh, this is largely just boring rules-y stuff.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
(From Gaurav): I assumed this when Radek got added to the long list of creatures that Rhu is expected to protect. Rhu is still extremely happy that Hazz' didn't bring up Dave, so, yay!
Ganelon: I'll look for some cool magic things that the game actually says exist.
Apheori (GM): You know the rules better than I do.
Gaurav: I should probably try to give Rhu better equipment or something >.< equipment is so boring
Ganelon: Doesn't have to be!
You can get armor that lets you teleport through a wall once per day.
(To Gaurav): Being supposed to protect them and knowing they're held in esteem can be very different things.
Apheori (GM): Now that could get funny.
Frezak (GM): Or smell like flowers.
Ganelon: I'll go look for some cool things.
Apheori (GM): In a 'wanted for tresspassing' sort of way.
Ganelon: The funny thing is that it only works on one wall, in one direction.
Apheori (GM): Sweet nightmares, Ellemer.
r
Ellemerr: Thanks, dearest. Sweet daydreams.
Ganelon: So while it will protect you from entering a solid surface (it just fails to activate), it won't give you a way back out.
(From Gaurav): Fair enough! Hanging out with Amadi and Dave means Rhu is a whole lot more understanding of people who find gods exasperating.
Gaurav: Bye, Ellemerr!
(To Gaurav): Snrk.
Ganelon: You have to spend six hours waiting if you can't find another one.
Gaurav: So what level do we need to be by next week?
Apheori (GM): The next. I guess that's 5? Is that 5?
Ganelon: It is 5.
Meaning new daily power.
Gaurav: Rhu is at level 3, so 4 is next for me.
Ganelon: Well, become 5!
Frezak (GM): I can invoke demon lords!
Well, one.
Gaurav: Okyday.
A daemon lord named Geoff.
Ganelon: I can... oh, gods.
I can animate a melee weapon.
Gaurav: wait, no, I am level 4. My bad.
Ganelon: I can take Gravy's shovel or something and make it float around.
Apheori (GM): Bahahah.
Poor Greibel. Probably fell asleep. >.<
Ganelon: I can also get a small summon which does only fire damage.
And explodes violently when killed.
Also some kinda cool-sounding but mechanically boring shrapnel-suspended-in-space thing.
Frezak (GM): I'll summon Codrichun. The Boiling Cloud of Blood And Bone..
Gaurav: Frezak: WOAH
Frezak (GM): "You sacrifice your foes to summon the hunger of Codrichun, a noxious cloud of blood and abrading grit"
Gaurav: that is fantastic
Ganelon: I seriously don't get why that's a Warden power when it contains like three Warlock buzzwords at least in the description.
Frezak (GM): You're just jealous.
Gaurav: heh
Ganelon: I'm totes jealous.
Frezak (GM): You don't get to sacrifice the vitality of your foes to a Demon Lord.
Gaurav: okay, I'm going to go find a coffee shop and do some work and whatnot. see you all next Sunday! Thanks for a fun game!
Frezak (GM): Sunday!
Ganelon: No, but I can twist space around like a lump of clay.
Gaurav: Apheori: enjoy the rest of the conference!
Apheori (GM): It's like over. >.>
GREIBEL: Hopefully you see this when you wake up, but a bunch of stuff happened and there were all these really amazing colours everywhere and you helped Gravy and Rhu try to pul Radek out of the pocket dimension with a hole in it, but while you didn't really succeed y'all kept him from getting pulled in and stuff. Then Hazz showed up and Radek actually stabilised it it and you pulled him out.
Also, duuude, colours.
Also you're going to need to level up.
Ganelon: We'll help with that, and explain shit. Just ask on Skype.
Frezak (GM): I'm at talking about shit

Session 25

Ganelon: So, where's the DM?
Frezak (GM): Sweden.
Ganelon: I'll dispatch the squad immediately.
Bear Soup Guy: The DM Squad
Fridays at 9
Apheori (GM): The DM is here! Mostly.
And I actually see all of your names for once. This is different.
Anyway, a bunch of crazy crap just happened, Radek now has a Hole in a bag, Greibel is noticing something weird in the sky, Rhu is hungry, and y'all are standing in a street.
Ganelon: How is he hungry after we just ate? Did nobody share with him?
Is the hunger... supernatural?
Gaurav: ^-- yeah, I'm no longer hungry! I would still like to find an inn, because the one HP I'm missing is annoying, but it's no longer urgent I guess.
If we have to I dunno save the world or something first.
Apheori (GM): Sorry, tired, not hungry.
Rhu continues scanning the skies for any signs of Dave
Gaurav: Is ... is Radek still ... laughing?
Ganelon: I could use sleeping time to fix that poor eyebot that died in the basement fire it totally didn't start.
No, he's uh...
Making a magic thing.
Which I'm looking through lists to determine.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: d20
Bear Soup Guy: And so it begins
rolling 1d20
(
13
)
=
13
Apheori (GM): Okay.
The mouseforged it bumping into Greibel again.
Rhu: Spot.
Er, perception?
Whatever it is.
Ganelon: It is that.
Gaurav:
rolling 1d20+14 perception check
(
11
)
+14
=
25
What am I perceptioning?
Apheori (GM): The sky!
Rhu sees some dragons and an airship.
Gaurav: oh! right. duh.
Apheori (GM): Greibel looks at the sky and sees funny colours. Mostly blue. Some swirls of death.
Gaurav: Like a zeppelin sort of thing?
Apheori (GM): I suppose.
Gaurav: No sign of Dave?
He peers intently at the dragons to see if he can spot her near them.
Greibel: (muttering) And now we're going to paint some happy trees...mix your blue and swirly death and use the number five brush...
Apheori (GM): Nope.
Gaurav: I'm not even going to try to convince the group to lease an airship so we can go hunt for Dave in the skies.
And have aerial hi jinx.
Bear Soup Guy: It would make for an amazing spin-off saturday morning cartoon though
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+12 heal check on the sleeping giant
(
1
)
+12
=
13
Ganelon: That sounds pretty fantastic but I just know I would be stuck on the engines.
Uh oh. Did you just kill someone?
Gaurav: ... again? Quite possibly.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: Sanity please.
Gaurav: Yay!
Rhu:
rolling 1d20
(
14
)
=
14
Apheori (GM): Rhu determines that the giant is actually a disguised whale.
Rhu blinks
Rhu: (mutters under his breath) ... should he have so much blubber? Hmm ...
Apheori (GM): You don't have time to reinvestigate, however, because there's a loud cracking noise overhead.
Frezak (GM): Oh, great.
escaped dragons hit teh airship.
Gaurav: it would be too much to expect that to be just a peal of lightening, right?
Er, thunder.
I'm awake.
Apheori (GM): It doesn't sound like thunder, and it's too close for the dragons... but the only thing directly above you is that huge arch-gate thing.
Ganelon: I didn't do it!
Apheori (GM): Which appears to be falling down.
Cracking into pieces.
And crap.
Gaurav: Hmm.
Apheori (GM): Collapsing.
Frezak (GM): Hmm.
Apheori (GM): Above you.
Ganelon: I think we should carefully consider the problem. Form a council.
Frezak (GM): Council, assemble!
I'l get the lemonade.
Gaurav: Should we roll initiative to see who goes first?
Bear Soup Guy: "athletics - 0, acrobatics - 1"
Well it's been nice knowing you all
Ganelon: Why not just turn into things?
Frezak (GM): What's the skill for organising dinner parties?
Bear Soup Guy: I believe that's gentility
Ganelon: Streetwise.
Bear Soup Guy: So yeah, we should probably avoid the thing
Apheori (GM): You may commence running for it. Although there is an odd thing, for those of you paying attention.
Those of you paying attention may notice that nobody else in the area seems to actually notice it. Nobody underneath is running for it.
Ganelon: Damn, so much for my plan to convince strangers to jump into the hole-in-a-rope for their own safety.
Gaurav: So Rhu's immediate impulse would be to run/dive out of the way. Can I roll initiative to see if he's quick enough to think for a second before his instincts kick in? Or would that be another sort of roll?
Frezak (GM): Who do I think is slowest here?
Beccause Gravy could charge and grab someone on the way.
Wait.
No.
I pick up radek and hold him above me.
Bear Soup Guy: Greibel is slow and intently staring at the sky, probably unaware of the collapse
Ganelon: Oh, you jerk.
Frezak (GM): I equip Radek in my off-hand slot.
Ganelon: I know I have the thing, but still!
Apheori (GM): Would initiative be right? Sure, why not.
Gaurav:
rolling 1d20+5 initiative
(
5
)
+5
=
10
I want to check if anything is falling on Amadi or the whale-giant. Is that initiative good enough to do that, or does Rhu jump first and think later?
Apheori (GM): Thinks first, jumps later.
Ellemerr: I'm here.
Apheori (GM): Initiative is based on reflexes and your reflexes kind of flopped, so you have time to think. >.>
Gaurav: haha
okay
is anything falling on either of them?
Ellemerr: I've read it all.
I'm totally on top of the situation.
Gaurav: I assume I see Radek being carried to safety by Gravy
Apheori (GM): The thing is starting to actually really fall now, but it seems to kind of be in slow motion, probably just because it's so big. It's also making horrible noises.
Greibel: The mouseforged bumps into you again.
d20
Ellemerr: Yeah! Or turn into one!
Apheori (GM): Ellemerr: A gateway is falling.
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20
(
6
)
=
6
Apheori (GM): Good.
Bear Soup Guy: Hallo merr!
Apheori (GM): Greibel: Everyone is going to die, barring alligators.
Greibel panics
Greibel flails wildly
Gaurav: BSG: quick! Make some alligators!
Ganelon: "I assume I see Radek being carried to safety by Gravy"
No, he's using me as a shield.
Greibel clumsily beast forms into an alligator
Ganelon: Because if you recall, he's used me as a battering ram in the past.
Gaurav: Gan: Close enough. As long as someone else seems to have you, Rhu doesn't have to worry about you. God's orders and all that.
Ellemerr: I think Amadi got out enough frustration with the recent nose-attack that she'll accept help if you want to worry about her.
I'm not saying that she needs it, though. Maybe.
Ganelon: Words cannot describe how grateful Radek is that he can manage his own safety.
And apparently Gravy's too at the same time.
Gaurav: Unless Amadi is clearly out of danger, Rhu is just going to grab her, see if he can do anything about the giant, and run. In that order.
Apheori (GM): Okay. So that happens. Aside from holding Radek as a shield, what's Gravy doing?
Ellemerr: ... Amadi might actually be jealous at Radek. She enjoys being carried, and I'm pretty sure she'd enjoy being used as a shield, too.
Frezak (GM): Observing with detachment.
Since has Radek, he's safe.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Ganelon: I feel so valued.
Ellemerr: Dragging. Besides, if it's not a giant with horns, it's just not the same...
Apheori (GM): Well, Rhu is sort of carrying her now.
Ellemerr: No, that makes it worse. He gets all the fun and he's not even enjoying it properly.
Ganelon: Would she feel less jealous if I mentioned that he was probably quite irate at the prospect of being carried?
Gaurav: Ellemerr: Rhu's got a cowl! That's something!
Ellemerr: Maybe you gave him one in a high moment? (Which, I know, is all moments.)
Besides, it reeds cowl on my screen.
Frezak (GM): Rhu needs to make more holes.
Bear Soup Guy: He's got a cow?!
Where did Rhu get a cow?
Ellemerr: ROCKS FALL EVERYONE DIES
Apheori (GM): Aaaand the thing falls to the ground in a horrible rumble and crash and throws up a lot of rubble and dust.
Bear Soup Guy: Ah, so it is a cowl
Apheori (GM): Y'all are crushed.
Bear Soup Guy: My (admittedly hilarious) mistake
Apheori (GM): ...just kidding.
Gaurav: A higher moment?
Huh.
Not the ending I was expecting, but I'll take it.
gg everyone
Ellemerr: *gasp* My hero!
Apheori (GM): Seriously, though, Rhu: Roll a thingy to get far enough away.
Gaurav:
rolling 1d20+10 acrobatics check
(
10
)
+10
=
20
Apheori (GM): Rhu escapes!
Gravy, Radek: d20s.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
16
)
=
16
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20
(
10
)
=
10
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You're an alligator.
Gaurav: bonus points if you can get a one-handed forward flip into that
Apheori (GM): Greibel: Still alive, but an alligator.
And kind of stuck.
Bear Soup Guy: I regret nothing
Frezak (GM): Hope he doesn't use the hand holding Amadi to get the flip.
Ellemerr: I feel so loved.
Gaurav: I hope a 10 is high enough to avoid that, but if that's what it takes to survive this ...
Ellemerr: Oh, right. Well, she can handle herself.
Frezak (GM): We love you dirty slut, but it's the midget that we don't worry about.
Ganelon: Yeah,,,
I'm not even sure what would make me legitimately concerned for Amadi's safety.
Ellemerr: That sounds delightful.
Gaurav: Her screaming again?
Frezak (GM): That's more irritating that concerning
Apheori (GM): Hmm.
Well, you're not dead.
I'm not entirely sure what you are, however. And, frankly, neither are you.
Frezak (GM): He's probably not an alligator.
Tha'ts Greibel.
using his power to adapt to the best form for any situation.
Apheori (GM): It's dark. You're not all there. You're not even sure where you are.
Frezak (GM): Because when have you heard of an alligator being crushed by a collapsing portal arch? NEVER.
So it was a wise choice from BSG
Ganelon: Rather than using his friends as living shields just because they have cool shielding artifacts?
Well, I say friends.
Bear Soup Guy: Alligators in the wild are nearly constantly assaulted by collapsing portals
Ganelon: Realistically, associates.
Ellemerr: I'm confused. Are we all in the dark and about to be eaten by grues?
Bear Soup Guy: it's a real problem and conservation efforts are seeking to end it
Gaurav: Who told BSG about the alligator thing? Was it a sanity roll or the mouse forged poking him?
Gan, BSG: hehe
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Radek: Arcana, please.
Bear Soup Guy: Sanity roll, I believe
digestion by grue is always imminent
Gaurav: and eminent
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+12
(
16
)
+12
=
28
Apheori (GM): Amadi and Rhu are outside the collapse. Dust is everywhere, and chunks of rubble. But you're fine.
Folks around you look very surprised, though, and are wondering what happened.
Amadi pokes a random person and tells them "It fell down," before asking, "Is that normal?"
Rhu puts Amadi down and shouts at the rubble: "Hullo! Where you guys?"
Apheori (GM): Well, some are? There's a guy over there who just ran into a huge rubble hunk, bounced off, and then just turned in another direction...
Ganelon: These people...
Frezak (GM): Wait, who is in the dark?
Apheori (GM): Gan: You're inside a pocket dimension.
Amadi looks confused.
Amadi: Is /that/ normal?
Apheori (GM): Gravy is with you.
Frezak (GM): Huh.
Apheori (GM): There's no sign of anyone else.
Gaurav: Oh. Huh.
Apheori (GM): Amadi: Random person looks confused, then afraid, and shakes its head and makes a hasty exit.
Radek: ...Gravy, you idiot.
Amadi finds another person and grabs its arm.
Amadi: Do you feel an urge to run away when asked questions?
The Gravedigger: What?
I thoughth the portal was nonfunctional!
Radek: Did you think about what would happen if we were buried?
The Gravedigger gives Radek a blank stare.
Frezak (GM): What the fuck man.
WHO ARE YOU TALKING TO ?
Radek: ...Right. Of course.
Ganelon: Buried under debris, dude.
Odds of our bodies being uncovered are pretty damn high.
Gaurav: If the rubble looks stable, Rhu is going to wander into the rubble around for the other party members, shouting their names as he goes.
Amadi: The sort of question like 'It fell down. Is that normal?'
Radek: Well, we're in another pocket dimension.
Apheori (GM): Amadi: The random person asks what sorts of questions those would be.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+14 perception check to aid my search
(
18
)
+14
=
32
Ganelon: This isn't my Hole dimension, is it?
I don't want to go back there.
Amadi: Or maybe 'Have you ever wondered what the sky tastes like?'
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You detect and alligator under a large chunk of archway.
an*
Amadi: I don't feel like those are run-away questions. But I guess I could be wrong.
Oh, the thing.
Amadi points at the rubble of the thing.
Apheori (GM): Gan: Doesn't seem to be. It's a lot smaller and feels different. Arcana?
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+12
(
8
)
+12
=
20
Hrmph.
Ellemerr: You can maybe assume that there's not a whole lot of alligators that aren't shapeshifters here. Though it's hard to tell in this place, I agree.
Random passerby: What fell down?
Gaurav: ... is there any way for me to recognise Greibel as an alligator?
Random passerby looks up at the sky, then suddenly looks at the pile of rubble and does a double take.
Apheori (GM): It's an alligator.
And there's a warforged arm.
Sticking out.
Amadi holds on to the random passerby.
Gaurav: Okay, avoid the alligator, help the war forged up/out of the rubble.
Amadi: What about the sky?
Ganelon: Out of the alligator or the debris?
Apheori (GM): Debris.
Ganelon: Pity.
Amadi: Have you ever wondered what it tastes like?
Gaurav: Ellemerr: that giant just turned out to be a disguised whale! Maybe he was an alligator disguised as a whale disguised as a giant? who knows.
Random passerby: (to Amadi) No, no, that is not normal.
Amadi: Oh.
Random passerby: I should... go.
Random passerby turns to leave.
Random passerby tugs.
Amadi: Will you help me with the rubble? I think I have friends in it. Why do you want to go?
Frezak (GM): I'm beginning to think that the people in this town aren't actually there.
Random passerby: What about it?
Gaurav: Amadi: "Go, Mr. Anderson? But how can you go if you have no ... feet?"
Amadi: Are you going to wonder now?
Apheori (GM): Rhu: Strength to move hunk of rubble.
Gaurav: Pfft.
Random passerby: No.
Ganelon: "Well, what's wrong with you?"
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+2 strength check to move rubble hunk.
(
20
)
+2
=
22
Ganelon: "I think it tastes like lemons."
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You move the rubble hunk off the mouseforged! And also uncover an alligator.
Greibel makes an alligator grumble
Apheori (GM): Radek: This pocket dimension doesn't seem to be attached to anything.
Amadi: Oh.
Amadi looks a little puzzled and possibly a little upset.
Gaurav: How do you make an alligator grumble?
Bear Soup Guy: Poke him with something! HAR HAR HAR
Random passerby: There are things that are, and things that are not supposed to happen, and sometimes these things mix. When they do, it is not the place to leave.
Please let go.
Amadi: Well, if you do start wondering, will you tell me?
Radek: That's... a problem. This space is isolated.
Rhu continues searching the rubble for Radek and Gravy, calling their names as I go
The Gravedigger: Hmm.
Ganelon: So it needs to be connected to something, but can we even do that from the inside?
Frezak (GM): Do you still have your ropehole?
Ganelon: Certainly.
Though that's not a great place to visit.
Frezak (GM): Hmmm.
Do i remember what the edges of reality feel like?
Amadi shrugs and goes to help Rhu, putting out a cheerful, "I'm not sure this actually happens, and fairly sure it shouldn't have."
Random passerby: Um... sure.
Random passerby pulls away and leaves.
Gaurav: BSG: do you still have your radio headset thing? I think I smashed mine against a rock a while back.
No, a wall.
Apheori (GM): Gan: It's hard to say. The thing is, it SHOULD be connected to something. It's very odd for it to be stable and livable and not be...
Bear Soup Guy: I don't remember ever losing it but I also don't remember the last time I used it
Apheori (GM): Frezak: Possibly, but there don't seem to be any edges here that aren't in Radel
k's pockets.
Frezak (GM): Hmm.
Amadi: I have a book!
Amadi looks delighted and promptly sits down in Rhu's way to read.
Apheori (GM): BSG: Sanity please.
Ellemerr: That's a mystery.
Apheori (GM): Amadi: You should check your book.
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20
(
13
)
=
13
Ellemerr: She was also going to help you look, but... book.
Gaurav: I'm ... in the middle of the rubble? How did you get out here?
Rhu goes around Amadi, puzzled at the total absence of party members in the area.
Gaurav: BSG: could you please turn back human when you can? The possibility of an insane alligator is a terrifying one.
Frezak (GM): I had an idea but it wouldn't help.
Do our radios work?
Bear Soup Guy: Surely, I think I've exhausted the possibilities of this alligator for now anyway :P
Greibel turns back to norma
l
Apheori (GM): Frezak: You try the radio. It picks up entirely too much stuff.
Amadi starts looking for windows, without looking at the sky.
Rhu: (to Greibel) Careful, there's an alligator around here somewhere. Do you have your radio? I think I smashed mine against a wall a while ago.
Bear Soup Guy: DM: Does Greibel still have his radio?
Apheori (GM): Amadi: In the book, it describes a concept of a window, that doesn't look out at anything in particular, and doesn't look in on anything at all. It is vague and general and fuzzy, and thus the average person simply ignores it.
BSG: It's in your pockets, apparently.
Bear Soup Guy: Okie dokie
Ellemerr: Ooo
Greibel: (at Rhu) Here ya go, buddy. I'll keep an eye out for that alligator.
Ellemerr:
rolling 1d20 + 7
(
3
)
+7
=
10
rolling 1d20
(
20
)
=
20
rolling 1d20 + 10
(
6
)
+10
=
16
Rhu takes the radio from Greibel
Ellemerr: (That's in the order you asked for them.)
Rhu: Thanks! (to radio) Hello? Radek? Gravy? Where did you guys get to?
Apheori (GM): Amadi: Perception and sanity, please.
And arcana.
Gimme all three.
Rhu: The radio ain't quite right. It's not set properly.
Amadi: Guys! Guys guys guuuuys!
Can you see this?
Rhu resists the urge to smash this radio against a wall, too, and hands it back to Greibel.
Rhu: (to Greibel) It doesn't work.
Apheori (GM): Ellemerr: You don't find a window, but you make a door, sort of like this, rather like that, and exactly how you would have dreamed it all along, if this were your dream. And of course you're fairly certain it is, because whose the hell else would it be?
Greibel: Electronics. Pfft.
Rhu: I know, right?
Apheori (GM): There is now a wooden door, complete with doorknob and hinges that aren't attached to anything, standing in front of Amadi.
Amadi looks like around to see if there's any random passersby.
Ellemerr: I have no idea where that "like" came from.
Gaurav: Can we see this?
Bear Soup Guy: Can we see this?
heh
Gaurav gives BSG a we're-going-slightly-mad-in-this-game-aren't-we high-five
The Gravedigger: I..... suppose I could dig a hole.
Bear Soup Guy: =D
Apheori (GM): Wjat
What's Radek doing?
Greibel sees it. Rhu: D20
Ganelon: Grumbling and trying to think his way out.
Amadi yells at the people "Hoy! Can you see this?" and points at the door.
Rhu:
rolling d20
(
6
)
=
6
Apheori (GM): Also the mouseforged is a bit crushed and is making sad noises.
Random passerby are finally starting to notice and are gathering around gossiping and crap. There's a pair of alligators in the crowd.
Amadi nods with infinite satisfaction and goes over to chat in mouse with the mouseforged.
Gaurav: Are you sure they're not a pair of ... Crocs?
Bear Soup Guy: If Rhu can see the door I'll try to calm the mouseforged and maybe attempt to move whatever's crushing it
Apheori (GM): Amadi: Some indicate yes, some no, and one guy asks what happened.
Rhu can't see the door.
Gaurav: 6 isn't insane enough to see the door? o.0
Apheori (GM): Greibel moves the rest of the rubble. It looks a bit smashed, but not dead.
Ganelon: This poor Mouseforged just keeps getting squished.
Apheori (GM): Gan: Roll arcana for random thinkies.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+12
(
19
)
+12
=
31
How are those thinkies?
Bear Soup Guy: Thinkie-rific
Apheori (GM): Very solid.
Frezak (GM): Meaty!
Apheori (GM): Radek is very thinky.
Amadi declares seriously, "I dream, therefore I speak."
Apheori (GM): He thinks about stuff and things, and realises it was probably the ball that did this, something slightly outside of its normal function.
Greibel: (to Amadi) Oh, you speak mouseforged?
Ganelon: The ball? You mean the thing what protects him from shovels and debris?
Apheori (GM): Amadi: You talk to the mouseforged, which is fortunately not in any pain, but can't move and is kind of scared. Do you calm it down or up?
Amadi pets the mouseforged on the head and tells it not to worry. It will soon be unstuck and the sky will taste magnificent and there are no cats, only alligators.
Frezak (GM): Otiluke's Protective Sphere?
Greibel: Works for me
Apheori (GM): Gan: Yeah. It doesn't just shield, since when sheilding wouldn't do anything, it came up with a different solution.
Amadi: I made a door! Because there are windows with nothing interesting on either side!
Greibel: So, um, what's that door doing there?
Frezak (GM): Oh, shit.
It's sentient?
Or at least has programming.
Ganelon: Do I still have it?
Amadi: I think it might only be interesting to some people.
Greibel: Is there anything interesting on the other side of the door?
Ellemerr: Have we freed Mouseforged?
Ganelon: Or are we like, inside the thing?
Frezak (GM): Sounds like it created a pocket.
Greibel: Show me, I'm very interested
Frezak (GM): Just to protect against the archfall.
Ellemerr: Can I magic up Mouseforged or will we require Radek?
Apheori (GM): Gan: Aye, you still have it. It's inside its own pocket thing.
Which doesn't make a whole lot of sense.
Ellemerr: Mouseforged is freed, but too damaged to move on its own.
Gaurav: Has Rhu spotted any of Gravy or Radek's belongings in his search of the rubble?
Radek: This artifact is more sophisticated than I realized.
Apheori (GM): Gaurav: Nope.
Radek: I think it created this space to protect us.
Ellemerr:
rolling 1d20 + 10
(
9
)
+10
=
19
Not as well as Radek, though.
The Gravedigger: That's.. scary.
Apheori (GM): Ellemerr: Sure.
Radek: Only if I can't undo it.
Apheori (GM): You know magicky engineering thingies! Arcana.
Ellemerr: I... guess. O_o
rolling 1d20 + 10
(
14
)
+10
=
24
If this is enough, I want to take Greibel over to the door and "tadaa" at it. And then wait for him to open it.
Apheori (GM): Amadi gets it into the right shape, but it's still broken.
Arcana again?
Ellemerr: If it's not enough I'll grumble and shove him at the door anyway.
Apheori (GM): Radek: Do you want to arcana to do anything?
Greibel: Do you want to open the door?
Bear Soup Guy: I'll hang around until Amadi's finished
Don't want to leave the mousey crippled and alone after all
Ganelon: Yes, I want to see if I can't return us to our most recent dimension.
Ideally, somewhat displaced from where we left it.
Rhu looks up to see Amadi and Greibel examining thin air, sighs, and resumes his search for clues.
Ellemerr: No, that's more than my attention span can handle. Let's door!
Ganelon: For a religious man, Rhu is pretty hands-on.
Apheori (GM): Ellemerr: You manage to find a few more broken things, and it starts working more, but it's still broken. Keep poking it?
Frezak (GM): Avengers are super handsy.
Ellemerr: I'll tell the Mouseforged I'm getting Radek and give it some cheese to smell.
Apheori (GM): Radek: Arcana to return, then.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+12
(
2
)
+12
=
14
Noooooo!
Apheori (GM): Gan: You don't even know where to begin. It seems all smooth sides, no edges, nothing to use.
Radek: Blasted spheres.
Mouseforged smells the cheese.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: Dave suddenly lands next to you.
Ganelon: Don't ask me if Warforged can smell.
Rhu: Aaa!
Dave: What the flying fuck happened here?
Rhu falls over into the rubble
Dave: Er.
The Gravedigger: Can't you....
The Gravedigger waggles his hands.
The Gravedigger: Jolt it?
Rhu: (to Dave) The archway collapsed. Greibel, Mrs. Teatime and I are okay, but Gravy and Radek are gone.
Ellemerr: I'm pushing at Greibel to open it.
Dave: I can see that. What happened?
Rhu shrugs
Apheori (GM): Guys, do you open the door, or just stare at it?
Radek: Oh yes, I'm sure abusing the artifact will solve our problem immediately.
Greibel: Okay, okay. My curiosity is peaked.
Greibel motions to open the door
The Gravedigger: Really? Well then -oh, sarcasm.
Ellemerr:
rolling 1d20
(
19
)
=
19
Radek stares intently at the ball.
Greibel opens the door
Radek: I'd rather not make another hole...
Apheori (GM): Greibel, Amadi, Rhu: d20s
Rhu:
rolling d20
(
15
)
=
15
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
1
)
=
1
Bear Soup Guy: WOOHOO INSANITY ROLL
Ellemerr: If this is a sanity roll and I'm NOT insane because of high roll I'm not sure what to do. Possibly curl up into a foetal position and moan.
Gaurav: BSG: super happy you are no longer an alligator
Bear Soup Guy: that makes two of us XD
Frezak (GM): Now he's an Aboleth
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You have no idea what they're looking at, but apparently there is something there.
Greibel: You open the door and fall through.
Amadi pushes the standing Greibel through the door and follows in order to get away from Dave.
Apheori (GM): Amadi: You feel weird. Dave is staring at you. It's uncomfortable.
Ellemerr: That's the Other game, dear.
Apheori (GM): Rhu, Amadi: Greibel didn't actually fall through. You just see him standing there.
Rhu: Huh.
Frezak (GM): No, no! Bring back my voices!
Greibel: whoopsy daisy!
Greibel falls I assume
Apheori (GM): Yeah, you got pushed. You fall.
Bear Soup Guy: Do I hit a surface or do I fall into some kind of hole place?
Apheori (GM): Greibel, Amadi: You find yourself in a new and empty space. It's all a bit white, not exactly decorated, just full of potential.
Bear Soup Guy: ah
Apheori (GM): You're on a floor of sorts.
Amadi sticks her finger into her head at either side and bites her tongue and concentrates really hard at banishing the uncomfortability.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You see Amadi push Greibel into a patch of nothing and they both disappear.
Ellemerr: fingers. Plural. And I'm not sure they go into her head or not.
rolling 1d20
(
11
)
=
11
Rhu: Hey!
Apheori (GM): Dave stares at Rhu instead.
Greibel: Nothing speaks to me quite as profoundly an an enormous blank canvas, but this clearly isn't the time.
Rhu walks up to the patch of nothing and tries to stick my head in
Apheori (GM): Rhu: d20
Amadi: d20
Amadi lets out a long and satisfied "Aaaaah..."
Apheori (GM): The fingers go into her head.
The feelings of sanity subside.
Frezak (GM): Jellyhead.
Amadi gives Greibel a cheerful look.
Amadi: So! What have we got here...
Rhu:
rolling d20
(
4
)
=
4
Amadi: Mm... Sims version, maybe? Do you want a pencil?
Ganelon: Gravy ought to try digging, I think.
Greibel: A abandoned IKEA?
Ganelon: Radek's not come up with much.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: It's a window, of sorts. A doorway. Do you want to do anything with it? (You don't actually see the wooden door the others did.)
Frezak (GM): I suppose I could try and tunnel my way through reality.
But this is recursive.
Gaurav: What do I see when I stick my head through it?
Frezak (GM): Gravy will poke the sphere.
The Gravedigger: Anyone in there?
The Gravedigger whispers to Radek "It's worth a shot"
Apheori (GM): Gaurav: You don't see anything. It's mostly just a sense, but magic or something might... do something.
Amadi hands Greibel a pencil, before proceeding to dish out a number of painting implements, some of them in strange colours that Greibel probably recognizes and Rhu probably wouldn't be able to see at all.
Greibel: Sure, I'd love a pencil!
Apheori (GM): The sphere makes a doinging noise, but it doesn't seem anyone hears.
Gaurav: Rhu doesn't know much magic, but ...
(From Amadi): I hope you don't mind. It seemed like the thing to do.
Frezak (GM): Oh well.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+4 arcana check to see if I can "activate" this window somehow
(
5
)
+4
=
9
Frezak (GM): I will try to use the edge of my mind's shovel to create a wound in reality, that I might exarcebate using the strength of graves.
Ganelon: Sounds dangerous.
Rhu just tries walking through the space that Amadi and Greibel vanished through to see if that does anything.
Gaurav: Sounds *awesome*
(To Amadi): Entirely appropriate.
Apheori (GM): Frezak: Roll something shovelly.
Rhu: The air turns purple.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+11
(
17
)
+11
=
28
Shovel skill: Strength and Trained.
Amadi spends a very long time picking out a brush. Then a longer time selecting a colour (mauve, a shade of purple). And then she just sits there staring into space for a bit.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: The walking does nothing.
Dave goes and pokes it too, and it turns green.
Rhu looks at Dave
Rhu: Huh.
Dave shrugs.
Apheori (GM): Gravy: You make the pocket lumpier. It now has a hole in it.
Ellemerr: Soon there'll be prophetic slugs. :3
Frezak (GM): I would like to use Gravyvision to scent the scent of Arah.
To direct me in my tunneling.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Ganelon: Suddenly it's Digger.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+20
(
3
)
+20
=
23
Uh-oh.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You have a pencil. What do you do with it?
Ganelon: Are we going to make a hole that defies conventional physics?
Frezak (GM): ONWARDS TO ADVENTURE
Apheori (GM): Gan: Yes.
Rhu pokes the green air
Greibel: (To Amadi, after prolonged silence) So...where are we exactly?
Frezak (GM): I'm shovelling reality, man.
Physics can suck it.
Ganelon: Well, I'm no good at digging but I'll follow him.
Amadi whispers, sounding sort of myserious and possibly a little holy, or like someone faking holiness, maybe, "The world is what you make it."
Ganelon: Still grumbling at the artifact.
Bear Soup Guy: I will scribble doodles on the white floor with my pencil
Apheori (GM): Gravy shovels. Radek follows. The pocket closes up behind you as you go.
Frezak (GM): Gravy will whistle.
Probably not very well, but cheerfully.
Amadi adds, narrowing her eyes and giving Greibel the least serious serious face ever, "The world is what you see and where that takes you."
Greibel: Can I make it ice cream?
Amadi shrugs, and just looks cheerful again.
The Gravedigger: "They said it was good, but they lied lied lied"
Amadi: But sure! Ice-cream!
Ellemerr: We whacked them with our shovels and they died died died!
Painting!
Greibel: Hmm
Greibel continues doodling on the floor
Apheori (GM): So y'all do this for a bit?
Gaurav: I could ask Hazz' for help, but it sounds to me like everybody is having a lot of fun.
Frezak (GM): Gravy has sense of time.
He's in the Zone.
Ganelon: Radek's not having fun.
Frezak (GM): The Shovel Zone.
Apheori (GM): Gaurav: But Rhu has no idea what they're doing or where they are.
Gaurav: He knows that not around, and that bothers him, but seeing as Hazz' just showed up in person and saved the world, he doesn't think it'd be polite to drag him into this again.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
I'ma get ice cream, and then tell you terrifying things.
Gaurav: And there isn't any obvious sign of distress. Amadi and Greibel walked into ... something. There aren't any bits of Gravy and Radek around, and Gravy is certainly the strongest person in the party, so unless something crushed him, he's probably fine. Rhu is concerned but not scared yet.
Damn, everybody's getting ice cream :-/
Bear Soup Guy: Not me, I'm on a diet :(
Gaurav: But Greibel is!
Bear Soup Guy: Oh, yes
Greibel is getting the ice cream world of his dreams
Ellemerr: Unless we get something else entirely out of this. I've no idea what I'm doing.
Oh, and Amadi ice-cream will most certainly... yeah, that sounds like Amadi ice-cream.
Gaurav: but is it vanilla?
Apheori (GM): It's rainbow-flavoured.
With all the impossible colours of the worlds.
Frezak (GM): The Flavour That Should Not Be
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You go through the rubble and notice some random bits of things. Looks like tape and twine.
Gaurav: The Flavour That Dare Not Speak Its Name (But Whispers It At Night When Nobody Is Looking)
Apheori (GM): Amadi: You eat ice cream and doodle...
Gravy: You dig, and dig, and dig.
Radek: You think Gravy might be digging in circles.
Rhu: Huh. Looks like the portal was literally held together with twine and tape.
rolling 1d20+14 perception check to examine the twine and tape
(
15
)
+14
=
29
Radek: Do you have any idea where you're going?
The Gravedigger: Do you?
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You sit back and examine what you've drawn. It seems to be a diagram of the worlds, with little bits for the planets, dumplings for the planes, and whole massive bowls of soup for... what, universes? One of them is labelled 'chicken', and another 'squid'. You're currently sitting on 'cat'. Right in front of you is a drawing of a key.
Greibel: d20
Radek: "Nowhere", from the looks of it.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: It's old, dusty, and the tape is not like any tape you've ever seen. The material is metalic and strange. The twine is completely ordinary.
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20
(
13
)
=
13
Apheori (GM): Greibel: The key seems solid, drawn out of the paper of the space, but not enough to turn.
Ellemerr hugs Gravy
Gaurav: Is it sticking/packing tape?
Apheori (GM): Radek: Arcana to something the nowhere.
The Gravedigger looms over Radek, shreds of reality dripping from his thought of shovel.
The Gravedigger: You have a better idea?
You want to go back to poking with your toy?
You think you're better because you're smart.
But right now, I'm the one tearing apart starstuff and walking where there is no path.
Unless you have anything HELPFUL to say, I'd APPRECIATE IT if you'd LET me WORK.
Radek: Fine.
rolling 1d20+12
(
5
)
+12
=
17
Ganelon: That enough to be helpful? Probably not, but I have no idea.
Apheori (GM): Well, he's definitely going in circles.
Ellemerr: I am not apologizing for hitting his avatar.
Frezak (GM): Since I'm stopping, can I take another sniff at Arah?
Apheori (GM): Totally.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+20
(
3
)
+20
=
23
Oh, gods.
Ganelon: We're both such failures.
Frezak (GM): Hazz, specifically.
Ganelon: Yeah, I'll bet Hazz is loving this.
Gaurav: Three simultaneous dead ends? Of course He is.
Frezak (GM): Hmmmm.
I think that Gravy might have an idea that he's not getting anywhere.
And since we are in a place of nothing....
Apheori (GM): Yeah, he's probably getting that impression by now.
The first time he might think he knew, but it happening again?
Rhu: (to Dave) Did you see anything interesting while flying around?
Dave starts explaining all the wonderful colours she saw, but most of it makes absolutely no sense, and a lot of the words don't fit together...
Apheori (GM): Rhu: d20
Rhu:
rolling d20
(
18
)
=
18
Apheori (GM): Rhu: Yeah, you have no idea what she's talking about.
Frezak (GM): I could sacrifice Radek to Codrichun.
Rhu nods at Dave, only half paying attention. He also starts playing with the skull he's been carrying around.
Ganelon: Go ahead! See what happens when it's just you and the crazies left!
Dave looks a little hurt, then starts petting her raccoon.
Apheori (GM): Greibel, Amadi: Do you do anything? You've drawn the worlds, you've drawn ice cream, and you've drawn some very interesting sponge life forms.
Rhu and Dave just kind of hang out in silence, playing with their toys.
Ellemerr: What about the key?
(BSG?)
Bear Soup Guy: I'm eating lots of ice cream and drawing fuzzy animals
Frezak (GM): Dude, you're crazy.
Gaurav: what are all the random passerbys doing?
Frezak (GM): Gravy is clearly saner than Radek.
Ellemerr hugs Gravy some more
Bear Soup Guy: Oh right
The key wouldn't turn right?
Apheori (GM): Some of the folks are trying to clear the rubble, since it's blocking the road. It also totalled a few buildings, so most of them are focussing on those.
It wouldn't turn.
The Gravedigger: Hazzridan!
GET YOUR TENTACLES AWAY FROM MY DIGGING OR I WILL TELL THE GODSHARD NAMED AMADI
Amadi inspects the painting of the everything (or whatever it really is). She reaches out for the key but hesitates and redraws without touching it.
Gaurav: o.0
Ganelon: "And she'll be quite cross!"
Gaurav: "There might be booping!"
Ganelon: "You likely won't receive an invitation to her tea parties, and if you arrive anyways, you will be viciously snubbed at the door!"
Amadi: Do you think we should find the others? The... YEAH, HAZZ!
... Gravy?
(To Amadi): You hear him.
(To Amadi): When he says your name.
Amadi shakes her head, slightly confused (which isn't unusual), shakes her head, then nods, and then nods some more.
Frezak (GM): So I'm going to MC into Invoker Of Amadi.
Apheori (GM): o.O
Amadi: And Radek, too.
Greibel: Do you think we could draw our way to them?
Rhu: (to Dave) We should help them move the rubble and fix the buildings and stuff, at least until everybody gets back.
Amadi sploshes down with her brush, spilling paint on the map.
Amadi: Here.
Dave: You're not worried?
Rhu: Worried? Why?
Greibel: I wonder where they got to.
Rhu: They've vanished, all of them. They're probably safe somewhere, and trying to get back to us, or something.
Dave: Your friends are... not here. Dead ends, trapped and lost.
Rhu: If there's any clues as to where they went, they'll be under a rock around here somewhere.
Greibel gets up to go over and look at Amadi's paint splosh
Rhu: My friends? They're your friends too, aren't they? I mean, you and Amadi -- wait, did you see dead ends?
Apheori (GM): Greibel: The splosh looks a bit empty, lacking colours, with a depth to it that indicates something.
Gaurav: BSG: can you draw a lock around the key?
Apheori (GM): It reminds you of a filing cabinet for some reason. A place where things go to be forgotten. A dead end.
Ellemerr: Experiment! The crazier the idea, the likelier a successful outcome!
Dave: If they weren't dead, wouldn't they be here?
Bear Soup Guy: Gaurav: Maybe! I don't know how this place works.
Rhu: I fell through a hole and got back here, and I didn't smell any fish now, so ... I'm sure they're fine. They'll find a way back. They're terribly smart.
Ganelon: Not today they aren't.
Dave: Hazz'ridan likes you. I don't think he likes them.
Rhu: Why did you say dead end, though? A dead end -- a really properly dead dead end -- would be a bad, bad place to get stuck.
Frezak (GM): Gravy is never smart.
Rhu: He likes Radek. He told me.
Frezak (GM): AND GODS WOULD NEVER LIE TO THEIR MINIONS
Ganelon: Yeah, that's never a thing gods do.
Dave: So what are you doing here? Go and get him!
Apheori (GM): I would like to remind you all that this is Gravy's fault.
Rhu: (to Dave) How?!
Ganelon: I hadn't forgotten, I just figure that it would be dangerous to point it out in-character.
Dave: What did the end god tell you?
Greibel tries drawing a door over the paint splotchy
Apheori (GM): Greibel, Amadi: do something.
Oh.
Rhu: I dunno. He mostly tells me to protect people.
Which I'm not very good at.
Apheori (GM): It's a pretty ugly door, but it looks like it might be functional. You'll just need to figure out how to open it in four dimensions.
Would you like to try?
Dave: And who are you supposed to be protecting?
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+9 religion check to pray to Hazz' to keep his friends away from dead ends, for now
(
15
)
+9
=
24
Bear Soup Guy: I...would like to try
Dave: Is this protecting? Loitering about with your underpants on your head?
Amadi watches Greibel with something that looks a little like glee, or maybe just cheerful crazyness.
Rhu: (to Dave) Shh, praying.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You get a sense that there is no away.
BSG: Arcana and a d20.
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20+3 arcana
(
17
)
+3
=
20
Rhu: (mutters) No ... away?
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20
(
9
)
=
9
Gaurav: High roll .. low sanity .. exciting!
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You open the door. Inside is colour - lots and lots of colour, swirling about in a terrible ocean of stuff. And things. And colour.
Amadi quickly draws a balloon shaped like a fish. And takes hold of the twine and takes it with her.
Amadi: Yessir!
Greibel: (to Amadi) Feel like a swim?
Ellemerr: Yes.
Greibel: That's the spirit!
Rhu: (to Dave) Thank you. This isn't protecting, but its all I can do for now. Unless you have a better idea.
I could poke at this green air, I suppose.
Greibel plugs his nose and dives in, hand-in-hand with Amadi
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+4 arcana poke to green air
(
20
)
+4
=
24
... but not like that's going to ... uh, hang on ...
Apheori (GM): The green air swirls into a plethora of colours Rhu can't see, but it does look shimmery and pretty damn neat.
Dave: That's what you do.
Rhu: I ... that ... huh.
Dave steps into the colours and vanishes.
Ellemerr: Those are a lot of nice rolls. O_o
Rhu: HEY!
Damnit.
Rhu steps into the colours with the name of his god on his lips
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+9 religion check: HALP
(
19
)
+9
=
28
Bear Soup Guy: We'll all be rolling ones soon enough
Ganelon: Never!
Well, I might roll 1s.
Apheori (GM): Radek, Gravy: d20s
Ganelon: I'll never roll Religion.
rolling 1d20
(
1
)
=
1
Speak of the devil!
Bear Soup Guy: There's our old friend
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20
(
16
)
=
16
You are a fukken weight, Radek.
Amadi holds very very very tightly on to Greibel and... holds very very very very very tightly.
Apheori (GM): Greibel and Amadi: You find yourselves swimming in the fabric and colour of the universe. Nothing is real. Everything is permitted.
It's totally psychadelic.
Ganelon: This is still your fault!
Frezak (GM): SLANDER
(From Amadi): Trying not to think about a lot of things. And loving this. Totally loving this.
Frezak (GM): It's your gorram sphere deviating from previous patterns!
Apheori (GM): Rhu: Everything is terrifying. You're swimming in weird... stuff. There is no sign of Dave, or anyone, or really anything.
Ganelon: Never thought using old men as shields would come back to bite you, huh?
Apheori (GM): There are NO ENDS.
Dead or otherwise.
Frezak (GM): If you hadn't had the orb I'd have just dragged you.
Apheori (GM): Gravy: You're stuck, you're cross, and you don't know what to do. Even digging didn't work, and it should have. You know it really should have.
Amadi: Wheeeeeeee
Greibel: Wow, dig this, man
Ganelon: What about me?
Apheori (GM): Radek: You get a really horrible idea involving edges of things. It might just work, and doesn't seem like it'd have much of a downside. Do you act on it?
Ellemerr: Dancing sounds lovely.
Frezak (GM): I will get back to digging regardless.
It's what I do!
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Greibel motions to Amadi for a dance in the vast everything of the universe
Ganelon: Of course I act on it!
Because I don't metagame.
At worst I'll feel bad if this ends up killing Gravy.
Ellemerr:
rolling 1d20
(
20
)
=
20
rolling 1d20 + 9
(
15
)
+9
=
24
Apheori (GM): What's metagaming?
Radek: arcana.
Ellemerr: Good enough for them both - let's hope!
Rhu looks around at the vastness of coloured nothing and looks sick.
Apheori (GM): Greibel and Amadi dance. I'd like d20s and acrobatics from both of you.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+12
(
16
)
+12
=
28
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
12
)
=
12
rolling 1d20+1 acrobatics
(
5
)
+1
=
6
Ganelon: Metagaming in this context would be playing one's character using knowledge that character should not possess.
Ellemerr: Yes. AGAIN.
Bear Soup Guy: Amadi is clearly leading this dance
Ellemerr: I'm telling you, all my good rolls are wasted.
Ganelon: For instance, I know that the idea which occurred to Radek is very likely a bad one with potentially dangerous consequences.
Frezak (GM): Did Ellemerr crit sanity?
Ganelon: But he doesn't think so, so why would he refuse to act on it?
Ellemerr: Psh, you know I roll really terribly at everything.
It's not nothingness, it's everythingness.
Frezak (GM): I don't know you anymore.
Apheori (GM): Amadi leads the dance, and you swim through the creations and destructions of a matter of things. There is no end. There is no death. There is no time. Everything is, and has always been, and will never not be.
Gan: Ah.
Gaurav: A ridiculously sane Amadi in the heart of nothingness might be pretty cool actually.
Apheori (GM): It's a bad idea, but only bad in that it's completely ridiculous and stupid, not in that... well, I dunno.
Bear Soup Guy: ^
Ganelon: Well, in any case.
He acts on it.
Gaurav: oh! hmm.
Apheori (GM): The ridiculous stupidity explodes as Radek turns the orb's pocket inside out, dumping Radek and Gravy into a strange island of colour.
Rhu: What are you doing?
The Gravedigger: Aaaagh!
Amadi does fancy swirling moves and dips and jumps and everything, and at some point lets go the balloon and watches it float off. She nods after it and instructs it in fish to do... yes, do. Something, somewhere, is singing. It might be everything, everywhere.
Radek: Gah!
Apheori (GM): RHU!
(From Amadi): I want a helpful balloon-fish. Can I have that?
Apheori (GM): Being sick?
Frezak (GM): I finally got that, Merr.
I'm ashamed.
(From Amadi): I'm not sure exactly what a helpful balloon-fish would do. Maybe just find the others. But... you know. Helpful balloon fish. Because. :3
Apheori (GM): Gravy, Radek: You realise Rhu is there. He looks ill, and doesn't seem to be able to see you.
Or much of anything, really.
Frezak (GM): I'll poke him regardless.
Greibel in typical fashion marvels open-mouthed at the amazing colors and things and stuff around him, as well as Amadi's dancing
(To Amadi): Sure.
Apheori (GM): Gravy, Radek: d20s
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
19
)
=
19
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20
(
19
)
=
19
Twins!
Ganelon: Damnit, we did it again.
Frezak (GM): Again!
Ganelon: Except I doubt we'll ever beat those double 1s.
Apheori (GM): Okay, you guys are good. You can't see much of the swirl of insaity, but you can definitely poke Rhu. So you poke Rhu.
The Gravedigger: Hey, Rhu!
Ganelon: Does he react?
And regardless of that, does the poke actually affect him?
Frezak (GM): I can invoke a demon lord if that helps.
Apheori (GM): Well, he's poked.
Ganelon: Doesn't it need someone's vitality as a sacrifice?
Apheori (GM): Rhu: d20
Frezak (GM): I really want to find a use for Codrichun.
Ganelon: That part strikes me as a little restrictive.
Rhu pukes
Rhu:
rolling d20
(
11
)
=
11
Frezak (GM): Well, I think that I promise it sacrifice when I invoke it.
Apheori (GM): You guys are literally surrounded by vitality. A successful roll would provide you all you need.
Gaurav: Sorry! My housemate's dog found a nest of robins in our front yard and I had to go ooh and aah over them.
Frezak (GM): I might summon all of him and not just an aspect.
WHich could be bad.
Since Codrichun just wants to obliterate everything.
Ganelon: Yeah, and if we're forced to kill him, your power won't work anymore.
Frezak (GM): I'd have to take my retrain for something.
Apheori (GM): >.<
Rhu only sort of sees you when you poke him. He's pretty out of it, like this place is eating him.
Frezak (GM): Hmmmm.
Can Radek rubberband him back to Arah and let us piggyback on the translocation?
Gaurav: I've never been eaten before. What a novel experience.
Ganelon: Gooood question!
Ellemerr: Are Amadi and Greibel just dancing?
Ganelon: I have no idea how he even got here.
Apheori (GM): What does rubberband mean?
Frezak (GM): Snap him back.
Like pulling a rubber band and then letting go.
Ellemerr: I think we were sort of trying to find the others but Amadi is probably distracted by the everything.
We could dance somewhere, too. Randomly.
Apheori (GM): Oh. You wouldn't know where to pull, unless you go mad enough.
Are you just dancing? Because I could totally see that.
The porridge floats around them
Frezak (GM): Either pull him further here, or just trace to where he came from, which'd be Arah.
Ganelon: Well, my objective would be to figure out where Rhu came from.
Bear Soup Guy: We could definitely just be dancing, or something could show up that we notice
Rhu motions to indicate that he can't speak but is glad to see you two, then turns in the opposite direction and pukes some more.
Ganelon: And I doubt my eyes will help much there, so magical senses will have to do.
Apheori (GM): BSG: d20
Radek: Arcana
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+12
(
9
)
+12
=
21
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20
(
17
)
=
17
Apheori (GM): BSG: You see objects and weird things. They're all squished and weird, with lots of variations all shoved together.
Gan: Rhu definitely came from somewhere, but you can't tell if it's still there.
Gravy: Something large and feathery runs into you.
Amadi: Oh? Oh!
Apheori (GM): It says, "This is all your fault, isn't it?"
Amadi: My fish is helping. My fish SHOULD be helping. It might not be.
Ganelon: Oh god, it's the chicken suit guy, isn't it?
Greibel shakes out the cobwebs a little
Greibel: We should find...someone.
People?
Gaurav: Chicken suit guy!
Amadi: We didn't lose it, I set it free! If you love something, set it free, and it'll bring you truffles!
Greibel: I think we...lost the fish.
Apheori (GM): One of you do a perception to find the fish.
Frezak (GM): How large?
Apheori (GM): It's not the chicken suit guy, but Dave.
Amadi: ... Possibly morels?
Greibel:
rolling 1d20+11
(
12
)
+11
=
23
Amadi: ... What someones were we finding?
Apheori (GM): The fish is gone. >.>
Greibel: Is that how it works?
Rasputin! Be free and bring me truffles!
Gaurav: If that is how it works, I've been doing it wrong all these years :-(
Rhu waves excitedly at Dave
Amadi: Gravy! He yelled at Hazz! For me!
Or... with me?
The porridge wiggles off into the colour, and swirls about, growing and fading.
Amadi: Er.
Let's find them!
Bear Soup Guy: Psychedelic Porridge
Good band name
Greibel: We had to find...the people we were with
Radek?
Amadi dances a very purposeful tango in what's hopefully the right direction.
Dave: (to Rhu and the others) Oh, hello.
This is an odd place to meet.
(to Rhu) You don't look so good.
Greibel: Let's!
Greibel does his best to keep up, tripping on the ether a few times
Radek: Do you know where we are?
Dave looks around.
Dave: Nope.
But it's very strange. Even more colourful than Arah.
Radek: Well, it may be the inverse of a pocket dimension.
Rhu: (croaks) in-verse?
I stepped through some green air to get here. How do we get out?
Radek: Good question. I haven't thought of anything yet.
Ganelon: I don't suppose there's anything I could do to make him better, is there?
Heal checks, maybe some ambiguous syringe application?
Gaurav: Leave me.
I'm just everything sick.
everythingsick*
Apheori (GM): You could do a heal check to find out.
Ganelon: Leave you *in* the everything?
Worth a shot.
rolling 1d20+9
(
4
)
+9
=
13
Mm, yes.
Apheori (GM): You dunno what's doing it, or what to do about it.
Ganelon: Definitely a fever.
(From Gaurav): Ah, I thought it was just the colours. Let me know when Rhu should get better.
Ellemerr: Are we getting anywhere?
Should I try the waltz? Maybe halling?
Frezak (GM): Alien spacebats.
Radek: Can you get a sense of direction here, Gravy?
Gaurav: At least we're back together again!
Try a foxtrot.
Radek: Rhu came from somewhere, I just can't be sure... where that is.
(To Gaurav): It's the colours, it's the madness, it's the enverything. No dead ends.
Frezak (GM): I'll sniff about for Arah! Or for anything odd.
rolling 1D20+10
(
15
)
+10
=
25
Sorry, mistyped.
Apheori (GM): Gravy: You're right on top of Arah.
Frezak (GM): that's 35.
Bear Soup Guy: We really can't pass up the opportunity to jitterbug in space
Frezak (GM): I lift my shovel triumphantly.
Apheori (GM): You're right on top of everything, including Arah.
Frezak (GM): AND DIG DEEP
Oh.
Everything?
Huh.
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Ganelon: So move everything out of the way except Arah.
Like digging peas and carrots out of your fried rice.
Gaurav: ^
Ellemerr: Oh that is bad that is bad that is bad turn right around and go the other way
The Gravedigger: Step aside, guys.
This is gonna get messy.
Ellemerr: (BSG: Feel free to not turn around.)
Frezak (GM): And I once again turn the power of landless earths to turn aside all that is not my destination.
Apheori (GM): Ellemerr: You get somewhere. You find yourself
.
Ellemerr: It might just be myself.
Oh, great.
Awesome.
Apheori (GM): Frezak: A dig and a d20.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+11
(
12
)
+11
=
23
rolling 1D20
(
14
)
=
14
Ellemerr: And he's with another Amadi?
Bear Soup Guy: I will boldly plow through myself
Apheori (GM): BSG: Yourself boldly plows through you, and then looks confused.
Ganelon: "Out of the way, dweeb-el."
(From Ellemerr): I can't stray far from the Key so if THIS Griebel doesn't have it I should know eventually but I'm going to try.
Apheori (GM): Amadi: You find yourself with another Greibel.
Ellemerr: Let's go in opposite directions and see what happens.
Bear Soup Guy: "dweeb-el" XD XD XD
Apheori (GM): Yup.
Bear Soup Guy: Oh this will be fun
Shall we make a hilariously bad attempt at playing all four of us?
Apheori (GM): Gravy! You dig and wind up spilling a bunch of world on top of you. You're not even sure which world it is.
Well, was.
Ellemerr:
rolling 1d20 +
(
13
)
=
13
Gaurav: I'm sure it was an unimportant and unnecessary world.
Apheori (GM): Ellemerr, Greibel: You go in opposite directions with your other selves, and then wind up running back into each other again. Then some random world is spilling everywhere.
d20s
Ganelon: This suddenly sounds like an utterly horrible idea.
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20
(
13
)
=
13
Ellemerr: Sing. Find Gravy. And get a new, more helpful fish.
Apheori (GM): You swim out covered in clams. There are now only the two of you again.
Would you like to do something specific?
Bear Soup Guy: I will pocket as many of the clams as I can for future clam dining
Apheori (GM): Gravy: You got world soup. Did I make you roll a d20? Do you keep digging?
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+12 heal check on myself to close my eyes and fall asleep
(
5
)
+12
=
17
Ganelon: If he's digging through everything, I'd like to keep a close watch to make sure he avoids the things which matter.
Like the principles Radek's insane profession draws upon. We don't want to disturb those.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You close your eyes and still see everything. If anything you see more. It makes you feel worse.
Quite so.
Rhu groans and opens his eyes again
Frezak (GM): I did do a D20.
And If I can still dig, I'll dig.
Apheori (GM): Oh, right. You continue to dig.
Radek: Arcana.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+12
(
18
)
+12
=
30
Apheori (GM): Since you're watching him.
Ellemerr: Yes!
Apheori (GM): Radek: He's wrecking stuff. Nothing terribly important, but bits that could be useful, planes that might be relevant.
Amadi: New useful fish leads you.
Do you follow new useful fish?
Greibel?
Bear Soup Guy: Absolutely
Amadi is singing a song about fishes that ends on a cheerful and singy "hellooooo"
Ganelon: Could I direct him around the stuff that matters?
Apheori (GM): Fish leads you to the others.
Fish also winds up in Gravy's digging.
Gan: Aye.
Gravy: Reroll dig. Gan: Assist him or something?
What exactly is he digging for? What do you say matters?
Greibel: We come bringing tidings of the universe, and clams!
Frezak (GM): Hey.
Ganelon: Well, things that matter to Radek and/or that might contribute to the success of their mission.
Frezak (GM): I could take us back to the world with the Car.
Amadi: I have a fish-balloon! Balloon-fish! I had two, but the other one isn't here now. They are both helpful fish, though. I'm just not sure how the first was helpful. The second was helpfuler. I think. What are you doing?
Ganelon: We do have a stable hole now, though.
Gaurav: I'm tempted to say we should get back to Arah and do things there, but we have destroyed one house, one portal, and part of a street, and probably killed a giant/whale/alligator.
So now might be a good time to leave.
Frezak (GM): I don't know what we can get out of Arah now.
Ganelon: I have nothing to do in Arah, this is true.
Amadi: Oh. It sort of looks like he's destroying the back-yard. Dog-style. I though you might be burying a bone.
Ganelon: But I'm not sure we could do much from that world either.
Radek: He's digging us out.
Gaurav: We could go deer hunting again. That was fun.
Amadi: My Keeper has a key and he drew another one. I don't remember what became of it.
Radek: And I'm trying to make sure he doesn't disturb anything important on the way there.
Frezak (GM): I could.... seek the thing that was not a shovel.
Ganelon: ...
Would you let me make it a shovel?
Dave: He needs a key.
Frezak (GM): Yes.
Yes I would.
Amadi: Should we have brought the key that he drew? It wouldn't turn, see. Should I go back for it? I'm not sure I can. I don't usually touch keys.
Gaurav: BSG: what key do you have?
Amadi: They hurt.
Bear Soup Guy: I have....I'm not sure
I have a ring I got from a skeleton. That could be a key?
Greibel: In retrospect, picking up the mysterious key was probably something I should have thought to do
Dave: I... don't know.
Amadi: ... Maybe my first fish was the key. Or maybe it'll go back for it! I know it's a very helpful fish.
Maybe it's feeding starving children in Thessalia.
Maybe it makes a mean couscous.
Greibel: Aw, that's nice of it
Amadi pulls out a daisy-chain. Very, very long.
Gaurav imagines a mean couscous
Radek: Say, do any of you have chains?
Gaurav: It kicks other food off your plate and snickers.
Bear Soup Guy: "Bean curd? More like bean NERD!"
Radek: A length of chain, perhaps... 20, 25 feet long?
Ellemerr: Then I'll be kind and not tell you.
Amadi: ... Oh.
Amadi looks sad.
Ganelon: I won't even ask out of where.
Radek: I meant a metal one.
Ellemerr: I'm laughing too much to do anything more right now.
Radek: ...And not shaped like flowers, either.
Frezak (GM): Monster.
Greibel: But it's still a very nice daisy chain, Amadi
Ganelon: I'm the worst.
Greibel: I'm sure it'll come in handy
Frezak (GM): Gravy briefly pauses.
The world has darkened, somehow.
Apheori (GM): Frezak: I need a roll and a destination for digging.
Frezak (GM): I'm seeking the thing that Radek told me was not a shovel.
rolling 1D20+11
(
17
)
+11
=
28
Apheori (GM): Radek: What IS the thing?
Ganelon: You want me to answer that? I was maximum-insane when I saw it!
Apheori (GM): Or just tell me what you know. >.>
Frezak (GM): It wasn't a shovel.
Ganelon: I remember that it was described as being "power".
Apheori (GM): Ooo, right.
That.
Er.
Is Radek assisting?
Ganelon: Yeah, what skill is that?
To keep him from digging through the good stuff.
Rhu mumbles a prayer to Hazz' to help Gravy in his quest to dig an answer.
Frezak (GM): Sounds like magical knowledge to me.
Ganelon: "Apheori (GM): Gravy, Radek: You descent into the darkness, losing sense of direction, including where you were supposed to be going. But it doesn't matter. Here, there is only the power, the sense of future, of everything that could be and will come to pass."
Amadi looks happy at the praise and then forgets about the daisies and notices Rhu and plods over and gives him a sympathetic look.
Apheori (GM): You can use arcana, if you're guiding him.
Ellemerr: Oh, I can maybe assist. I can roll arcana.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+12
(
10
)
+12
=
22
Ellemerr:
rolling 1d20 + 10
(
13
)
+10
=
23
Frezak (GM): So I'm looking at a 30, unless anyone else can give me an assist.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+9 religion check to plead with Hazz to help Gravy
(
18
)
+9
=
27
^-- does that count as an assist/can I assist in any other way
Ellemerr: It's in my interest that he doesn't break the world. I hate cleaning up anything.
Apheori (GM): Eh, okay, so you dig. And you dig.
And you dig.
Ellemerr: Roll.
Gravy: Radek guides you away from breaking things. Amadi sort of helps too.
Right, so you both do that.
Gravy: You dig into a strange hole.
Radek: So, where are you going, exactly?
The Gravedigger: Power.
Ganelon: Hmmm.
May I insight you, there?
Amadi hands Rhu some painkillers.
Gaurav: What is Dave doing?
Frezak (GM): I suppose.
Apheori (GM): Dave is watching.
How do those sorts of insights work?
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+4
(
10
)
+4
=
14
Between players, the rules are pretty... unclear.
Amadi hands Rhu a bottle of water as well.
Ganelon: Hence why I asked permission, because it's on Frezak to adjudicate what my character can figure out about Gravy's intentions.
Rhu: (to Amadi) I ... don't think I can keep 'em down ...
Ganelon: And with what DCs.
Ellemerr: PS: I'm not sure that's -actually- water.
Ganelon: In this case, the least I was hoping to figure out was whether he was talking about the thing that these two encountered or something else.
Rhu has some careful sips of water, then drinks more
Frezak (GM): Yeah, Gravy isn't hiding it and it's info you have, so you're pretty sure that's what he's talking about.
Gaurav: I'm absolutely certain it isn't :P
Radek: You mean... you know the way back?
The Gravedigger: AGAIN WITH THE QUESTIONS.
I'm telling you I'm going there, so WHAT DO YOU THINK?
Ganelon: "More sane than Radek", he says.
Ellemerr: It's the boooooooom smash!
Frezak (GM): yeah.
Doesn't mean Gravy is sane.
Apheori (GM): This would be the point where the hole Gravy is digging collapses and you all fall into Midnight.
Frezak (GM): Whoooo
Bear Soup Guy: Delicious midnight
Frezak (GM): It's the laaaaaast Midnight
Ellemerr: It's where Amadi has wanted to go all along.
She never said what for. Nobody asked.
Ganelon: There was a thing we were supposed to do in Midnight, wasn't there?
Ellemerr: Cheeeeeese!
And now you'll be forced to wonder! For a whole WEEK!
Apheori (GM): It's late. I need to go snorkel cheese.
So... uh... next time I'll tell you what Midnight is, or something.
Ellemerr is crushed by sleeping people.
Ganelon: I likely didn't ask because I didn't expect a helpful answer.
Frezak (GM): Eeeeeh
Apheori (GM) falls asleep on Ellemerr.
Frezak (GM): Ew.
Bear Soup Guy falls asleep on Apheori
Ganelon: Well, with any luck I'll have other games to distract me until them.
Gaurav: snorkel cheese?
Ganelon: Like the one Karstein's been NEGLECTING so he can tend to his stupid real-life obligations.
Frezak (GM): Tell you what.
We can play Blink next time someone flakes.
Ganelon: That sounds like an excellent idea.
Frezak (GM): I'll have you chased by the Weeper.
It'll be great.
Ganelon: That sounds considerably less excellent.
Frezak (GM): Also you have a sack of teeth in both games I run now.
Well, this was a fun session.
I dug things.
Bear Soup Guy: Well, till next time guys. Fun session! Adios!
Frezak (GM): So character objective fulfilled.
Bear Soup Guy goes off to pass out
Ellemerr: Cheesecake, guys.
Gaurav: byeeee everybody

Session 26

Apheori (GM): Is gan here?
LEIK GUIS LETS GO
Woah, these are weird bugs.
Anyway.
Rhu continues to be sick in spaaaace
Gaurav: or in Everything. whichevs.
Ganelon: Space is a part of everything.
Apheori (GM): Gravy digs into midnight.
Gravy, Rhu, and Radek find themselves in a space of utter blackness, except you can all sort of see each other.
And hear each other.
And possibly each other's minds.
Gaurav: o.0
Rhu thinks angry thoughts about Dave, who got him into this mess
Gaurav: Is Dave around?
Apheori (GM): Greibel, Amdi, and Dave are nowhere to be seen.
Does Gravy keep digging? This isn't what you were digging for, but what you were digging for is perhaps here somewhere.
Ganelon: Oh man, people hearing Radek's mind?
They're not going to like that.
Apheori (GM): Go on.
Ganelon: It's at all times either incomprehensible jargon or incredibly rude.
If you're lucky, the rudeness is done in incomprehensible jargon and thus may not be understood well enough to be offensive.
Right now he's thinking about the shielding artifact.
And where the hell he is, but I suspect everyone is doing that.
Apheori (GM): You're all standing on nothing. I feel like I should point that out.
Unless Rhu is sitting.
Also the skull is gone.
Also the artifact has turned a funny colour.
Also Gravy's mind is a shovel.
Gaurav: I thought Rhu was floating as in a pool of water. Also: skull vanish nooooooo
Apheori (GM): It's a pool of nothing. You sit in nothing.
Frezak (GM): Well if my mind is a shovel then I'll keep digging because that is what shovels do.
Ellemerr: I don't know where I am.
Rhu realizes the skull is missing and looks around frantically for it. Or Dave. Or something.
Apheori (GM): Gravy keeps digging. He goes around in no particular direction, and looks rather strange.
Ellemerr: Where do you want to be?
Ganelon: Well, I was standing on everything not five minutes ago, so this can't be too much stranger.
Ellemerr: "Nowhere to be seen" = "nothing". I guess that makes sense.
Gaurav: What does Rhu see when he sees Gravy and Radek? Are they floating? Is Gravy partially invisible in his newly dug grave of nothingness?
Apheori (GM): Gravy, Radek, Rhu: d20s
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
4
)
=
4
Frezak (GM): 8
Gaurav:
rolling d20
(
4
)
=
4
YES
Apheori (GM): Rhu sees digging and jargon.
Gravy sees a shovel.
Radek sees the artifact inside out.
Everyone is floating, and everything is solid and not all there.
Ganelon: Does it look as mundane on the inside as it does on the out?
Apheori (GM): Bits trailing behind.
To you, yes.
Frezak (GM): I don't know if shovels want to get shovels.
Apheori (GM): It's pretty straight forward, but it 's not going to protect you too well from this.
You're not entirely a shovel anymore.
You can roll again to be more or less of a shovel.
Frezak (GM): 8
Apheori (GM): Gravy is partially gravy and partially shovel mind.
Rhu, Radek: You see this.
Frezak (GM): That's really not helpful information if you want me to tell you what Gravy does.
(To Ellemerr): You can't play Amadi here. Amadi cannot exist here, not without the rest of her. Would you like to play the relatively sane whole of which Amadi is a part? *shifty eyes*
Apheori (GM): Gravy can do anything.
I don't know what he does in that situation.
What information do you need?
(From Ellemerr): O________O
(From Ellemerr): That's terrifying.
(To Ellemerr): I'm sorry!
Ganelon: I'll occupy myself with the question of "where am I?"
(To Ellemerr): You could also just be somewhere else.
Frezak (GM): I'd love to know how much of Gravy's mind is the mind that I know.
And not that of an inanimate, non-sentient tool.
Apheori (GM): Let's go with 80%
Gan: Arcana.
Ganelon: And a name alone isn't the answer I'd settle on. Properties of this space, for instance, would help to know.
rolling 1d20+12
(
7
)
+12
=
19
Apheori (GM): It's not really space at all. It doesn't really seem to exist, or be here, and neither do you. Thoughts seem to affect it, though, and you seem to be as much thought at this point as solid object. If there is such a thing as a solid object. It's hard to tell.
Frezak (GM): Sounds like shovelspace again.
Ganelon: Hmm.
Frezak (GM): Well, no-shovelspace
Ganelon: Then I'll start by imagining boundaries and see if they don't become semi-real.
A floor, walls, etc.
Gaurav: Rhu gives up on looking for Dave and Skull, and prays to Hazz' to protect them both, wherever they are.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+9 religion check
(
12
)
+9
=
21
Frezak (GM): A thermionic valve transducer
(From Ellemerr): I can try. I think. If you give me some time to get used to the idea first. >.> Shovel some more, first.
Apheori (GM): Radek imagines a room, and a room forms around the three of you, shapes or perhaps ideas of walls and floor and ceiling forming out of the black.
You all sort of drift down to the floor and wind up standing/sitting on it.
Radek: It seems we have the power to create, here.
Apheori (GM): Instead of on nothing.
Rhu is lying down on the floor with his eyes open, staring at the ceiling.
Frezak (GM): Gravy imagines Gravy.
Apheori (GM): Gravy: Roll insight.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+3
(
16
)
+3
=
19
Gaurav: (in a senseless, mumbled monotone:) Why do we have the power to create? And where is "here"? And where did Dave go?
Rhu: (in a senseless, mumbled monotone:) Why do we have the power to create? And where is "here"? And where did Dave go?
(continues mumbling about Dave and skulls and whatnot)
Apheori (GM): Gravy winds up with a somewhat confused Gravy spread out before him, which is looking back at the somewhat confused gravy spread out before him.
The Gravedigger: Gimme a hand with this digging!
We're almost here!
Ellemerr: *laughs*
Apheori (GM): Two Gravediggers dig in opposite directions.
Frezak (GM): Double chances to find something.
TEAMWORK
Apheori (GM): They hit the walls Radek made and the room sort of falls apart.
Frezak (GM): by myself
Radek: Hmph.
Rhu looks blankly at the two Gravys digging, then back at the ceiling. He sighs wearily before getting up and walking over to see if he can help with either digging effort.
Radek: If you're not digging graves, use a machine.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: Sanity.
Rhu:
rolling d20
(
15
)
=
15
The Gravedigger: Crafstmanship, grumpa.
Professional pride.
Apheori (GM): What is Gravy digging for?
Does he know?
Ganelon: Grumpa. Good one.
Frezak (GM): He's looking for the One True Shovel That Apparently Isn't Actually A Shovel
Apheori (GM): Roll perception to check if he already has it.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+10+2
(
4
)
+10+2
=
16
Apheori (GM): Amadi: You're in a kitchen. Dave is there, and so is Elia, and another one whose name you don't know. You're not sure she even has a name.
There are a bunch of cakes on the table.
Gravy doesn't notice he already has it.
The shovel.
Frezak (GM): It might be Bruce Willis.
Apheori (GM): Gan, Rhu: Gravy's getting further away, except he's not actually getting further away. Perhaps just more... spread out?
Frezak (GM): Smeared across reality!
LIKE JAM
Apheori (GM): What reality?
And what kind of jam?
Radek: Honestly, I have to solve /everyone's/ problems...
Apheori (GM): Gan: Feel free to arcana everything.
Ganelon: I do know what he's looking for. Do I know where it is?
Apheori (GM): Or anything.
Arcana it!
Rhu continues to try to walk towards the two Gravys anyway. When he notices the jam-smeared-Gravy thing, he stops, then looks around to give Radek an "are you seeing this?!" look
(From Ellemerr): In a kitchen... where? Do I know?
Gaurav: much like this pug -> http://tumblr.ggvaidya.com/post/86721110009
Radek shoots Rhu a "I know, right?" look right back.
(To Ellemerr): It's in your realm. Well, all of your realm.
Frezak (GM): I should summon Codrichun to help! :3
Ganelon: Given how intent may be communicated in more ways than just the looks themselves, he probably gets it.
Yeah, Codrichun is well-known for helping.
Frezak (GM): Totes.
Ganelon: All sorts of things.
(From Ellemerr): Do I know what I'm doing there? xD Is anything... different? Beside their presence?
Gaurav gives up on reaching the Gravys and instead tries to perception these walls by poking at them
Rhu gives up on reaching the Gravys and instead tries to perception these walls by poking at them
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+14 perception check on the walls
(
12
)
+14
=
26
Frezak (GM): I think plural should be Gravies.
Because it looks better.
(To Ellemerr): You really don't. You shouldn't be here - you should be somewhere else. Something was dug, though, and you bounced. And now you're here with these other fragments, one of whom is reading the paper and ignoring you, the other two... well, Dave is eating a cake and looking around in confusion, and Elia is just screaming silently. But she's no longer a skull, so that's maybe something?
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+12 (locating the source of Gravy's search via Arcana)
(
17
)
+12
=
29
Er, not the source.
The object.
Gaurav: can we distinguish the Gravies in any way?
Apheori (GM): Rhu sees the walls fall away.
They're both Gravy.
Ellemerr: ... I'll... eat a cake. I'm sure cake will make everything better. Mmm, cake.
*is ready to scream and run*
Rhu just kind of stands there with his finger frozen mid-poke and an "oh shiiiii-" look on his face.
Apheori (GM): Radek determines that Gravy, both the Gravies, already have the shovel and that's what they're digging with.
Rhu tries to reimagine the wall back into place with his mind.
Apheori (GM): Actually locating it, however, kind of fails. The entire concept of 'location' here kind of fails.
Rhu: Sanity please.
Rhu:
rolling d20
(
11
)
=
11
Gaurav: hmm
Apheori (GM): Rhu winds up with a wall right in front of him. This one has some wood panelling, is generally plastered, and is trimmed with some nice boards.
It fades away almost immediately.
Rhu: Huh! Wait ---
Rhu tries imagining another wall, this one nice and solid and made of red bricks.
Radek: Gravy! Both Gravies!
Apheori (GM): Amadi: It's good cake. Not perfect - it tastes a little old - but good.
Radek: Listen to me. The shovel has always been with you!
The Gravedigger: Huh.
Radek: You're literally using it to search for itself, idiots!
The Gravedigger: Well that explains why it didn't work.
Thanks, Radek.
Radek: Whatever! Just stop making a mess of the nothingness!
Apheori (GM): Amadi: Elia keeps screaming silently. Dave smiles at you every time you look at her. The other one never looks up from her paper.
Gaurav: Is that one of the Gravies talking, or are they both talking as one?
Apheori (GM): One of them is talking, the other is doing any relevant hand motions or whatever.
Gaurav: Dave _smiles at Amadi_? Creepy.
Apheori (GM): Dave is being GIR.
Frezak (GM): Gravy will sheepishly try and put things back.
Apheori (GM): Roll arcana or sanity.
Ellemerr: Yeah, I feel I have reason to be creeped out over here.
Ganelon: Gravy rolling Arcana?
Oh, I'm excited.
Apheori (GM): You can also roll digging, but I can't promise it won't make things worse?
Amadi: So, girls... um. Tea, maybe?
Frezak (GM): ARCANA
rolling 1D20+3
(
7
)
+3
=
10
Amadi: ... Am I the only one with a feeling we should be... elsewhere?
Apheori (GM): The two Gravies put some things back together and then run into each other.
It turns out they're not too good at coordinating two bodies.
Amadi: The one with the paper looks up curiously. Elia keeps screaming. Dave says, "Er."
Ganelon: Elia must be the worst roommate.
Gaurav: Tea! Just the thing to sooth your throat after a silent scream.
Frezak (GM): Dave doesn't sound too great either.
Gaurav: Does Rhu have his backpack/rest of his inventory with him?
... does Amadi still have her little book of all answers?
Apheori (GM): If he checks for it, yes.
Amadi has a lot of things.
Amadi takes out the tea and starts serving everyone. Miss Paper gets extra sugar. Dave extra milk.
Radek: Alright, you two. Three. Whatever.
Rhu doesn't know why he suddenly remembered the journal from when they first landed in CAR near the commune, but he looks for it now.
Radek: We're only going to get in each others' way in here if we try to work towards different goals.
What are we trying to do?
The Gravedigger: I'm in my own way.
Rhu keeps searching. He finds the piece of tentacle he found in the portal, squeezes it lightly a few times like a stress ball, then puts it away again.
The Gravedigger sits down.
Apheori (GM): The one with the paper thanks her and goes back to her paper, sipping the tea.
Daves stares at her cup in confusion. Elia won't take a cup at all.
Radek: You have a Rhu going through his bag, and two Gravediggers sitting before you.
Amadi pours the tea into Elia's open mouth, and Dave's cup over Dave's head.
Rhu: I have no idea if this will help, but I still have some mushrooms from that stoned philosopher we met in the prison in the town with all the policemen.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You pull out a rock with a bird symbol on it.
Gaurav waves the mushrooms and rock-with-bird in front of Radek
Rhu waves the mushrooms and rock-with-bird in front of Radek
Apheori (GM): Amadi: Elia keeps screaming. Dave blinks, sputters, and then punches you in the face.
Radek: ...Really, Rhu? You want to do drugs?
Now?
Gaurav: Yeah, I suspect Amadi would be the worst housemate of the lot, unless you like your tea with extra sugar and on your head.
Frezak (GM): WHO PUNCHED AMADI
Gravysense is tingling.
He's a defender, gorramit!
Apheori (GM): Gravyvision!
Do it.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+22
(
4
)
+22
=
26
Jeebus
That's still better than most people.
But not great for Gravy.
Rhu: It's either the mushrooms (waves mushrooms) or the rock with the bird (waves bird rock).
I wish I had that skull back.
Apheori (GM): Gravy: Hazz did it. You see some sort of incident with a bunch of fancily-dressed gods. Not-amadi is rubbing her nose.
Frezak (GM): I will marshall all my legs and stomp angrily up to Hazz
Gaurav: all four legs
Apheori (GM): Roll arcana to interact with the Hazz vision.
Frezak (GM): Ugh
rolling 1D20+3
(
14
)
+3
=
17
Apheori (GM): Or digging.
Frezak (GM): That was arcana.
Apheori (GM): Good.
Digging results would probably be unpleasant.
Radek: Huh. I never took you for a student of the arcane.
Ganelon: (Or anything. Young whippersnapper was probably homeschooled)
Apheori (GM): Gravy: You get the feeling you're mostly just seeing something that already happened, but you can also touch it if you'd like. What do you do?
Basically you have two Gravies sort of standing between a Not-Amadi and a Hazz'ridan.
Frezak (GM): Gravy will Mark Hazzridan.
Means that Hazz has a penalty to hit other people and Gravy gets to smack Hazz for doing so.
Gaurav: I assume Rhu cannot see his God being marked.
Apheori (GM): No, he can.
Radek and Rhu now see this too, since Gravy's focussing on it.
Frezak (GM): It's not an attack, it's making that target aware that Gravy is a presence that will not tolerate violence on the people he wants to protect.
Radek sits down with his rifle leaning over one shoulder, and elbows Rhu.
Radek: This ought to be good.
Rhu: HEY!
The Gravedigger: NO HITTING!
BAD GOD!
Ellemerr: Sorry, I'm being terribly distracted. Please excuse my slowness. >.<
Apheori (GM): Gravy: Roll sanity.
The Gravedigger: 7
Frezak (GM): Yay!
Gaurav: Nicely done.
Apheori (GM): Ellemerr: Don't worry. He failed the roll and got something completely different from what you're interfacing with, so you've all the time in the world.
Rhu steps up in between Hazz' and Gravy. He takes his maul out, but is clearly confused about who he should support here, and just sort of holds it by his side.
Apheori (GM): Gravy: Hazz'ridan sees you.
Frezak (GM): My mark is a Burst, so I mark Rhu too.
The Gravedigger: NO FIGHTING.
Hazz'ridan: Hello, Shovel.
Ellemerr: I'm lovin' this.
Ganelon: ...Does he appreciate being called that?
(To Ellemerr): If he rolls badly enough he might actually become the god of shovels.
Apheori (GM) cackles.
(From Ellemerr): I'm lovin' this.
(From Ellemerr): Frezak: Beware. *cackles*
(To Ellemerr): *maniac grin*
Rhu sees Gravy staring at him with mark-like intensity, and turns slightly to face him while keeping Hazz' in his peripheral vision. His maul is still down.
The Gravedigger: You don't hit the godshard, okay?
That one, specifically.
Ganelon: "All the others are totes fine)
Gaurav: Does the voice sound like Hazz' as Rhu hears him in his head?
Hazz'ridan: Godshard? She is no shard.
Apheori (GM): Sure, why not.
It also sounds a bit amused.
Amadi bangs her palms into the table, making the tea pot jiggle.
Amadi: FINE. I'm better off without you anyway.
Amadi leaves the kitchen, banging the door.
Amadi also stood up angrily when she banged her palms into the table. But Ellemerr forgot what she was writing on the halfway.
Apheori (GM): The tea spills over the newspaper, and the one at the table looks a bit affronted. Dave rubs her nose, then blasts Elia with something as Amadi leaves.
Amadi: You are now outside the cottage. It's a nice little area, with something of a clearing and garden near it, and woods further off.
Birds chirp pleasantly. A warm breeze drifts through the leaves.
Some flowers bloom mockingly.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+14 perception check to check not-Amadi for ... godshardiness
(
9
)
+14
=
23
The Gravedigger: I don't really care.
Just don't hit whatever it is again.
Amadi harrumphs and glares at the flowers. How dare they be so cheerful and brightly coloured!
Apheori (GM): Rhu: This one might actually be sane. Like... really not a shard. Or something.
Gaurav blooms as well.
Rhu: (to not-Amadi) ... Mrs. Teatime?
(From Ellemerr): So... they're seeing Ea? Why did Hazz punch her? Did she punch back?
Apheori (GM): Gravy: The not Amadi taps you on the shoulder and asks you what you're doing in her closet.
At least you think she said closet. But that doesn't really make sense, does it?
Rhu: (to Gravy) I don't think that's our Mrs. Teatime.
(To Ellemerr): Yup. Way in the past, or something. I think she asked him to do whatever it was in the first place. As a joke, or something. Possibly to mess with all the other gods' heads.
The Gravedigger: Well you want to tell me why YOUR god is going around bopping midgets?
Sounds /really/ godly.
Amadi stomps over the flowers and towards the... when? She knows she's supposed to be sometime. She's... not sure she wants to. She should probably bring the others. All of them. But she /knows/ she doesn't want to do /that/.
Rhu: Bopping ... midgets?
Radek: Honestly, it sounds exactly like the behaviour of gods to me.
Rhu looks at Hazz' in confusion and the merest hint of a rebuke
Not Amadi: Who are you calling a midget?
Ellemerr: Heeeeee
The Gravedigger looks down.
The Gravedigger: You.
Hazz'ridan: And what are you doing in the realms of gods, Wayfarers?
Rhu: Were you ... bopped ... by Hazz'ridan the Wise and End of All, Mrs. maybe-Teatime?
Apheori (GM): Those of you with perception may notice that none of the other gods can see you.
Radek: Vacationing. Hazz'ridan, right? I've always held the utmost disrespect for your line of work.
Frezak (GM): So I'm about to leave shortly.
Not Amadi grins.
Apheori (GM): Aww.
Rhu: I was lead here by the godshard you asked me to protect, oh Keeper of Finality.
I think she might be nuts.
Ellemerr: I am not a nut!
Nor am I several nuts.
Ganelon: Are you suuuuure?
Not Amadi looks Rhu over.
Not Amadi: If she led you here, she must have been.
Rhu: Ellemerr: I was lead here by the _other_ nutso godshard.
Gaurav: err, ooc
Ellemerr: Oh, that you were.
Gaurav: although Ellemerr showing up here wouldn't be _impossible_ I don't think ...
Ellemerr: Well, /she/ might be nuts. She was very rude, regardless. *hrmph*
Hazz'ridan: (to Radek) Good.
Rhu: (to Not Amadi) Seriously. I hope she's okay though. She's ... not herself.
(to Not Amadi) You're not Mrs. Teatime, are you? Are you the person I saw in the portal when I met my Lord?
s/saw/met/g
Not Amadi: Seeing as she's me, I hope so as well. Well, a part of me, I suppose.
That would have been another part, I suspect.
I guess I'm dead at that point.
Apheori (GM): Frezak: How shortly is the leaving?
You may vanish at any point.
Ganelon: How extended is the leaving, as well?
Apheori (GM): That too.
Frezak (GM): Pretty much now.
I don't know >.>
Apheori (GM): Hmm.
Rhu takes all this in, glancing at the other gods as I do.
Amadi keeps going, glaring and stomping at more flowers on the way.
Frezak (GM): LIkely an hour or two.
Ganelon: I wonder what would happen if I detonated my megabomb here in the realm of the gods.
Apheori (GM) giggles.
Apheori (GM): The Gravediggers vanish.
We may also want to take a general break at some point until Frezak gets back, but randomly vanishing is normal here.
Rhu stares at the space previously occupied by a pair of Gravies
Apheori (GM): Amadi: You trample through the woods, and they get darker.
Ganelon: I might take a quick nap while he's gone, if it's truly okay.
Amadi: Stupid Dave. Sure, so she's anger, but does she have to share it like this? I really am better off without her. Ugh, get out of my head, Dave! I left you; I left you in the heart, and... We're not Her. That's the whole point, and I'm better off anyway.
Amadi mutters angrily as she tramples through the woods.
Apheori (GM): Aiight, we'll come back to Rhu and Radek and the gods later.
Ganelon: Getting angry at anger? Not the most productive way to spend one's time.
Ellemerr: I have a ton of things I should've done today that I naturally haven't done. But if her comes back in two hours, that's when I need to sleep. >.>
Ganelon: Awww.
Ellemerr: he*
Ganelon: Well, I intend to return on the hour exactly.
Apheori (GM): Hopefully he comes back sooner so we can sort out a saner meeting time. >.>
Ellemerr: I won't be far away. If I seem unresponsive, use skype. If it doesn't work, use more skype.
Ganelon: And even on a different day, no less.
Apheori (GM): Actually, Ellemerr, we could keep going.
But yes, a different day would be good.
Ellemerr: Hm... for a little bit, I guess.
Apheori (GM): So Amadi is trampling through the woods, heading toward... what is she heading toward? Does she even know?
Ellemerr: Nope!
She's got a little more than half a mind to go where she's supposed to be, but the remaining little-less-than-a-half is struggling.
Apheori (GM): Still trampling all the flowers she can find?
Ellemerr: Naw, only the ones that are convenient, and have cheery colours.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
There are a lot of woods.
I think she should roll something to determine if she really makes it.
Ellemerr: Well - Into the woods we go again; you have to every now and then...
rolling 1d20
(
5
)
=
5
Apheori (GM): Amadi gets distracted by a small shack.
Ellemerr: Into the woods, no knowing when; be ready - actually, this seems like too much effort. And I'm never ready for anything.
Amadi goes over to the small shack and opens the door.
Apheori (GM): How could you be ready?
Roll a d20.
Ellemerr: No idea.
rolling 1d20
(
6
)
=
6
^ This is basically my day.
Apheori (GM): The inside is a bedroom.
There is a big, fluffy bed, and bits of yarn and odds and ends everywhere.
And pillows.
It hasn't been entered in awhile, and things are a bit dusty. Leaves have blown in under the door.
Gaurav: I wonder if Amadi is the only person in this game for whom low sanity rolls are actually bad.
Amadi: Trying to tell me something, huh.
Apheori (GM): The bedroom doesn't answer.
Amadi sighs and gives the bed a long, tired look. You have to sleep to wake up, right? But dreaming... The dreams will always be there. Here. Everywhere. Her mind still torn (is she alone in there? Truly?), she picks up the duvet and shakes it vigorously, before proceeding with brushing bunnies (the dust variety) off the sheets and beating the pillow to a state where putting your head on it won't submerge you in a dusty cloud.
Apheori (GM): The dust fills the air with sparkles.
Amadi smiles slightly.
Amadi: It's all shiny, capt'n.
Amadi then goes to bed.
Apheori (GM): The feeling is nostalgic, like something from a very long time ago, an old dream oft returned to, and always forgotten. Full of magic and childhood.
Covers tucked in around, late evening light sparkling at its end, a long day behind you, and tiredness tugging you into sleep's soft, soft embrace.
You don't dream.
Ellemerr is somewhere between utterly peaceful and utterly freaked out.
Apheori (GM): Heeeee.
That's all I've got, then.
Ellemerr: I'll do my things. >.>
Apheori (GM): I'll get really distracted.
Gaurav: how much time do we have before Gan/Frezak may return?
Apheori (GM): I dunno. This thing doesn't have timestamps.
Gaurav: ugh. well, I'll go get lunch, and be back by 12:30 MT, and hope for the best.someone annoy me on e-mail/sms if I need to hurry back!
Apheori (GM): Is everyone back?
Gaurav: I'm back. Mm, burger.
Apheori (GM): Argh, I should pin my orchid down.
It's growing funkily.
Ganelon: I'm here.
Frezak (GM): *waves*
Ellemerr: Oh, if it's not obvious, I'm here too.
Gaurav: when are we playing next?
Ganelon: I always did like the old tuesday sessions, but any time is probably okay.
Frezak (GM): We never stopped.
We never started.
We are.
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Frezak (GM): Tuesdays would probably result in me having suboptimal participation.
Apheori (GM): Oh gods, these noodles are spicy.
Ganelon: When would you suggest then, Frezak?
Gaurav: oh dear
Frezak (GM): I really wouldn't >.>
ONly days I'm supposedly free are Friday and Wednesday
Apheori (GM): AAAAAGH BISCUITS
How supposed is supposedly?
Ellemerr: All days are more or less the same to me now that it's summer.
Ganelon: Well he often has time to watch movies on those days, from what I observe.
Apheori (GM): Ow ow owo ow ow.
Gaurav: Is that the noodles?
Apheori (GM): Yes. >.<
Okay, where were we?
Ganelon: Nowhere.
Ellemerr: I'm sleeping.
Ganelon: Well, Midnight.
Where nothing is.
Ellemerr: Or possibly waking.
And NOT dreaming.
Gaurav: I thought it was everything?
The Gravies had just vanished.
And not-Amadi was talking sense.
And Hazz' was surprisingly untalky.
Apheori (GM): I can't get the log to load. >.<
Ganelon: Yeah, quite unsettling, that.
Gaurav: Oh, and there are other gods somewhere and they can't see us, but I'm not sure where they are :-/
Apheori (GM): You've half barged in on a fancy party.
Except they can't see you. And as far as you're concerned they aren't really there, aside from the Not-Amadi and Hazz'ridan.
Gaurav: but where are they relative to the room-missing-one-wall we're in? Inside? Outside? Are they in human/elven forms, or looming over us?
Apheori (GM): This is kind of... on top of the room? It's hard to tell. They're all about the same sizes as you.
So it's just Rhu and Radek and Hazz'ridan and Not Amadi.
Rhu blinks
Apheori (GM): Gravy: You're now one Gravy. Would you like to be one Gravy in any particular place?
Frezak (GM): Both Gravies?
I'd like to be with my team.
I have a job to do!
Radek: So is this what you people do when you're not causing problems for us mortals? Hold tea parties?
Apheori (GM): Rhu, Radek: You may or may not notice that Gravy is now standing behind you.
Hazz'ridan: Ridiculous, isn't it?
Not Amadi: I know, right?
Although we're not supposed to be agreeing on things. Why are you agreeing with me?
The Gravedigger: Radek, any reason we should be wasting our time here with this... /god/ ?
Not Amadi eyes Hazz suspiciously.
Frezak (GM): God said in the same way someone would say 'foot fungus'
The Gravedigger: We have Holes to fix.
Not Amadi giggles.
Radek: None whatsoever, though "time" and... indeed, "here", are rather loose concepts in this situation.
Rhu: (to not-Amadi) ... are you the old God that Mrs. Teatime and Dave are parts of? Have you ... absorbed them?
Not Amadi: Oh, astute.
Radek: Would you like to try and escape? I doubt we'll see Amadi behaving this sensibly ever again.
Rhu: No, I'm Rhu.
The Gravedigger: Time... Are you a god that was?
Apheori (GM): Who is everyone talking to?
Frezak (GM): Not Amadi.
Ganelon: Radek was addressing Gravy.
Gaurav: Not Amadi
The Gravedigger: (to Radek)
Escape? Well we can just leave. AT least in this place that isn't.
In this time that isn't.
Rhu: (to Gravy) In this time?
Not Amadi: Might have been, might be again. Sorry about my selves. I didn't plan on being dead, if it makes you feel better.
Didn't plan on a lot of things, though.
The Gravedigger: I'm okay with the dead.
It's the gods that irk me.
Hazz'ridan: Perhaps you should start.
Rhu: (to Not Amadi) Were you the person I met in the portal where I met Hazz'ridan Endlord? The one with the curtains?
Ellemerr: Sorry, I was praying. This is lovely.
Hazz'ridan: (to Rhu) In your time, she is dead. All that remain are fragments, memories. You could not have met Eapherod as she is.
Rhu: In my time ... what time is _this_, my lord?
What time are we from? When is my home?
Not Amadi: Time is past, and present, and future. You're not exactly in time at all, now are you? Could call up anything. That's what Midnight is, you know. Anything.
It's not something you should talk to Hazz about, though.
Not unless you want real answers.
Hazz'ridan emits a general aura of menace.
Radek: Can it fix the mess we came from?
Rhu: I ...
I just want to go home.
The Gravedigger: We have a job to do, Rhu.
Hazz'ridan: These are the wrong worlds for your home.
Not Amadi: These may be, but passage can be arranged.
Should I send you to your home, then, little wayfarer from another time? You need only ask, and you could put all of this behind you.
Rhu turns and looks at Gravy, then back at Not Amadi (can we just call her Eapherod now? Hazz' used that name)
Rhu: No. He's right. We have a job to do.
Apheori (GM): Er, right.
Frezak (GM): Gravy gives Rhu a hearty pat on the shoulder.
Not /too/ hearty unless Rhu has good Con.
Gaurav: omg
can you roll something on that? It would be hilarious if Rhu fell over.
Hazz'ridan nods.
Apheori (GM): Fortitude-related?
(To Ellemerr): So how do I get Gravy to turn into a god?
Frezak (GM): Sure, i'll make an attack Vs Fort.
Str.
rolling 1D20+6
(
14
)
+6
=
20
Oops.
Gaurav: heee
my fort is 14
Rhu goes down in a heap
The Gravedigger: Whoops.
Sorry, Rhu.
Eapherod: I think I'm going to like you guys.
At least, I hope I will.
Rhu: (muffled, from floor) I'm fine! I think.
Frezak (GM): I'll reach down and pick him by the scruff of the.... clothes and put him back on his feet.
Gaurav: hahaha
that's awesome, thank you
(From Ellemerr): He'd hate you, I think. Which doesn't answer your question. My answer to that is: no clue.
Rhu dusts himself off
(To Ellemerr): He hates everything. >.>
The Gravedigger: So, Radek. Do we know how to close the Holes yet?
Like, properly, without stranding us 'where ?
Frezak (GM): the word " 'where " is the word where proceeded by the sound of two words that don't exist.
And aren't said.
Because they aren't two words.
Rhu: The last time that happend, we prayed to Hazz'ridan the Magnificent and he saved us all.
Then Mrs. Teatime punched him in the nose.
Radek: Well, my portable hole isn't closed so much as stable... I've yet to figure out the closing part.
Eapherod moves and gently pulls Hazz'ridan aside. As she does, the entire scene fades back into the black, leaving the three of you in the room of nothing against nothing once more.
Radek: I have ideas, of course, but untested ones.
(From Ellemerr): I'll just watch until you tell me to anything else. *shifty eyes*
Frezak (GM): I'll heft the Shovel.
The Gravedigger: You want to be somewhere a little more real?
(To Ellemerr): I've completely lost track of what was supposed to be happening.
The Gravedigger: What about you, Rhu? Done with your God for now?
(To Ellemerr): So... er.
Rhu: No, I ... wait, has he vanished? Then I suppose so.
(to Radek) Do you still have the bag with the Hole in it?
Frezak (GM): Didn't he just say he did?
(From Ellemerr): ^_^;
Radek: Of course I do! I'd be a laughing stock if I lost this.
Gaurav: I'm wondering if it got pulled into the pocket universe the orb created for you two, or if it was dropped when the arch collapsed.
Frezak (GM): Except we'd hardly laugh at radek.
Radek retrieves the Rope Bundle of Holding from his bag.
Frezak (GM): Well, not for /that/
Ganelon: I hope it really is there.
Frezak (GM): Snaaaaakes
Apheori (GM): It
s there.
Do you want to examine it?
Frezak (GM): I'm sure Codrichun can help here.
Ganelon: I don't know what Rhu was asking for.
Does he want to hop in and thus leave Midnight?
'Cause I mean... I guess that's a solution, but the hole is still in there.
Gaurav: naah, I just wanted to make sure you hadn't dropped the bag or something (for quite a while last week, I thought you two were _inside_ the bag, which was still in the rubble somewhere). but if you have the bag, then we can experiment with it if necessary.
we might have wanted to show it to the gods or something.
Rhu starts tapping the walls of the room again
Frezak (GM): I could probably tunnel us somewhere.
Apheori (GM): I think we should call this a day.
I'm about to fall asleep.
Something about noodles.
Rhu: Carb coma!
Frezak (GM): Is that a thing?
Gaurav: would these kittens lie to you? https://i.chzbgr.com/maxW500/5946874368/h8064D9EE/
also: yes -- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Postprandial_somnolence
did we figure out when we're meeting next?
Apheori (GM): Nope.
Gaurav: we can figure it out on Skype later
I will be able to check because *I'll get my laptop back today!!!!*
Gaurav does a happy dance
Apheori (GM) collapses on the laptop.
Apheori (GM): Sorry.
Gaurav: are you apologizing to your laptop?
it's 2pm, way past our usual closing time
Ganelon: I think she's apologizing for yours.
Gaurav: oh. hm. then i shall go retrieve my laptop now and collapse on it myself. I'll check in on Skype for newly scheduled times later.
thanks for a fun game everybody! bye!
Ganelon: See you later, Gaurav.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Ganelon: Okay?
Apheori (GM): I'm having connection trouble.
I seem to actually be connected now.
Gaurav: Yay!
Ganelon: So where were we, again?
Apheori (GM): Apparently I'm getting constantly disconnected.
Gravy, Radek and Rhu are in an expanse of blackness. Out of the blackness, things can be made, and visions conjured up - for instance right now you all are in a room of sorts, imagined out of the black and providing you some semblance of reality to stand or sit on.
Greibel: You are somewhere else. Where would you like to be, and do you remember what happened to the mouseforged, because I don't.
Agh, crap, I'll be right back.
Rhu continues to tap on the walls to check their solidity, basically leaving it to the sensible people to figure out what next.
Bear Soup Guy: I don't remember what happened to the mouseforged but I would like to be in a giant swimming pool filled with chocolate pudding
Gaurav: I checked up on the mouseforged. He was too damaged to move after the arch collapse, but was last seen sniffing at some cheese Amadi gave him, so I guess he could have followed Amadi and Greibel, Dave or me, or still be sitting round in the rubble.
Ganelon: I think Gravy and Radek intended to leave.
Gaurav: Wasn't there some mention of maybe trying out Radek's explosions in here?
I was hoping for a Midnight-shattering kaboom.
Ganelon: Well, I off-handedly mentioned it, but it seems like that would have absurd consequences.
Frezak (GM): I was just wondering where to dig to.
Gaurav: Can we dream up a map of every Hole in the universe?
Apheori (GM): Greibel: d20, please.
Ganelon: Well, I doubt we can make things based on information we don't have.
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20
(
16
)
=
16
Apheori (GM): You can dream up anything, but you need to roll for it. Feel free to roll for stray thoughts of, say, sandwiches, too.
What pops into your heads?
Gaurav: Well, now, sandwiches :-/
Apheori (GM): Greibel: Excellent.
Rhu thinks of home
Apheori (GM): But first you need to wake Amadi. Or something. She's in a shed or something. Do you want to try?
Rhu: ROLL.
Rhu:
rolling d20
(
8
)
=
8
Bear Soup Guy: So now I'm in the chocolate swimming pool?
Apheori (GM): Not yet.
Amadi first.
Or are you?
No, actually, I think you are.
Sorry.
Bear Soup Guy: Okie-dokie
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You are in a giant swimming pool full of chocolate.
Greibel looks around suspiciously
Apheori (GM): But you feel like you should wake Amadi, because she's missing this, or something.
Bear Soup Guy: Where is Amadi?
Ellemerr: In a shed.
Sleeping.
Apheori (GM): In a shed. Not here. But it's connected to here.
Somehow.
You can dismiss the thought, or you can focus on it and try to do something with it.
Bear Soup Guy: hmmmm
I'll mull it over in my head while I do a backstroke through the chocolate pool
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You think of home, wishing you could go back, but knowing you can't, not yet. And then you realise you're holding a mop.
Rhu looks down at the mop
Apheori (GM): Amadi: You can also wake up on your own. Not dreaming is pretty horrifying, after all. Roll to wake.
Ganelon: Well then.
Let's try imagining something that Radek definitely does not know.
Frezak (GM): COMPASSION?
Ganelon: No!
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Ganelon: A recipe, for...
Ellemerr:
rolling 1d20
(
10
)
=
10
Ganelon: Honeyed shortbread cookies. Why not.
Apheori (GM): Dammit, still getting disconnected.
Ganelon: Is that even a thing? I guess it doesn't matter.
Apheori (GM): Ellemerr: Again.
Frezak (GM): Neutronium Gumbo.
Apheori (GM): Totally a thing.
Ellemerr:
rolling 1d20
(
13
)
=
13
Apheori (GM): Radek: Roll sanity.
Or... arcana.
But sanity is funnier.
Gaurav: They look delicious actually: http://www.thecrepesofwrath.com/2013/02/20/honey-shortbread-cookies/
Ganelon: You make an excellent argument.
rolling 1d20
(
11
)
=
11
Apheori (GM): You wind up with a recipe for 'complex gumbo'. It looks like another recipe was on the page as well and was torn off, but you can't make out quite what is was, aside from needing to cool, and making 4 dozen.
Ganelon: Hmm.
Then I suppose I'll have to conjure up the ingredients, huh?
Apheori (GM): Greibel: The chocolate pudding is smooth and warm. You drift through it slowly, suspended in puddity.
Gan: If you'd like.
Bear Soup Guy: Puddity is the best fake word ever invented
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
9
)
=
9
Apheori (GM): Amadi: You drift slowly out of the emptiness, sensing once again the shapes of dreams, of everything that you know and are. Suddenly you find yourself pushing for them, harder and more insistently, needing the dreams, needing them to fill you, become you, and...
...then you awaken, sweating and scared, in the bedroom in the shed in the woods, surrounded by nightmares and all the sweet dark things that have protected you for as long as you can recall.
Frezak (GM): So, nothing unsual.
Apheori (GM): Radek: You summon a bunch of ingredients, but they're not entirely the right ones. One of them, for instance, is a really big fish, and the frying pan full of molten silver doesn't really have any place in the recipe at all.
Most of it is right, though. Mostly you just need some gumbo and a big pot.
Radek: Hrm.
Bear Soup Guy: Ingredients for Gumbo:
Apheori (GM): Rhu: Really big fish.
Bear Soup Guy: 1) Gumbo
2) Something to put the Gumbo in
Gaurav: .... how really big?
Apheori (GM): Bigger than Gravy. It winds up sitting on the room's floor a bit away from Radek. He may or may not ignore it. That's up to Radek.
Amadi hugs several of the most terrifying nightmares.
Gaurav edges away from the giant fish, looking around
Rhu edges away from the giant fish, looking around
Rhu: (... frantically)
Apheori (GM): Amadi: One of the nightmares tries to take the shed's roof off and then squeezes its way into your hair.
Rhu tries to conjure a door in the wall of the room that we're in
Rhu:
rolling d20
(
13
)
=
13
Apheori (GM): The door conjuring fails.
Amadi squees and cuddles the nightmares and grows some extra hair.
Radek: I wonder where the structure comes from...
Oh, do you need some help there, Rhu?
Greibel tries to find someone else
Frezak (GM): I will poke the fish.
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
7
)
=
7
Frezak (GM): For science.
Rhu hides behind Gravy
Apheori (GM): Greibel: Who did you try to find?
Bear Soup Guy: Anyone, really
Apheori (GM): Gravy: The fish is firm, and barely gives. Clearly fresh.
Bear Soup Guy: Amadi perhaps, since I was with her last I think
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Frezak (GM): Fish sandwiches?
Apheori (GM): Amadi: You find Greibel floating in front of you. He's covered in pudding.
Greibel: You see Amadi. There's somethign weird about her hair.
Greibel: Hmmm
Amadi picks up one of the smaller nightmares and holds it out to Greibel, grinning benevolently.
Greibel offers Amadi some pudding
Greibel: It's chocolate!
Oh okay, let's trade.
Greibel attempts(?) to take the nightmare
Amadi exchanges small nightmare for chocolate pudding.
Greibel holds the nightmare up triumphantly while victory horns play
Ellemerr: Now I really want chocolate pudding >.>
Apheori (GM): XD
Niiice.
Rhu is clearly panicking but trying not to show it.
Greibel: Whaddaya do with this thing?
Gaurav: (to Radek) I'm g-good, thanks. Can we get rid of the fish though? It's ... yeah. Big fish.
Ganelon: Can I get rid of it?
Apheori (GM): Certainly.
Ganelon: Then let it be annihilated.
But not in a messy way. I don't want fish guts all over this reality.
Amadi: You dream with it, beloved.
Gaurav: We could make a window and throw it out.
We could put it in the Bag of Holding.
Greibel looks at the nightmare skeptically...
Greibel and then tries to put it in his head
Gaurav: We could throw it through the Hole in the Bag of Holding.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: The nightmare oozes down your hands and then wraps itself around your head like a hat.
Ganelon: You know?
Apheori (GM): Gan: How would you like it annihilated?
Ganelon: That's probably how the big fish ended up in Sarathi.
Apheori (GM): Caaareful.
Greibel smiles triumphantly
Ganelon: We threw it in this hole and it ended up in the past to traumatize Rhu.
I've figured it out.
Greibel: (To Amadi) How does it look?
Apheori (GM): Is that what you do?
Gaurav: o.0
Apheori (GM): Throw it through a hole?
Amadi: You two are adorable.
Apheori (GM): How's Gravy? Just thinking/watching?
Frezak (GM): He's looking really thoughtful.
Without actually doing much thinking.
Just practising looking thoughtful.
Going 'hmmm' gravely now and then.
The Gravedigger: Hmm.
Ganelon: Let's spit in the face of physics.
And convert the fish into energy. Heat, sound, and light.
Rather, another form of energy, since everything is energy in some form.
Apheori (GM): Nice.
Ganelon: And since the goal here is to be wasteful I can totally make it all flashy, too.
Gaurav grins
Apheori (GM): Roll arcana to make flashy!
Frezak (GM): SHoulda got fire resistance.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+12
(
20
)
+12
=
32
Frezak (GM): WE ALL BURN
Ganelon: HAA HA HA HA HA HA!
Gaurav: Oooooooooo. They'll see the flashy all the way way over where Greibel is.
Apheori (GM): The fish explodes in a brilliant shower of sparks and strange sounds, which then turn into a phoenix and try to fly away.
Bear Soup Guy: That's what I was thinking
Apheori (GM): You wind up with a phoenix perching upside down on the corner of not quite wall and not quite ceiling.
Greibel sees a flashy. Amadi does not.
Radek: There. Much better than a fish.
Rhu: Is ... that a fish-bird?
Radek: Oh no, I can assure you that not even the smallest trace of fish remains.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You're still in the pool of pudding, within the strange colourful place of utter darkness. Amadi is... elsewhere, but you're interacting through a... what, thin spot or something?
Radek: It has been utterly eradicated.
The Gravedigger: Hmm.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: Would you like to do anything with it, perception the area, try to pull amadi through, eat the pudding, or who even knows?
Rhu lets out the breath he's been holding.
Bear Soup Guy: I'd like to try to pull Amadi through to where I am so we can go looking for the flashy
Apheori (GM): Greibel, Amadi: Sanity, please.
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20
(
5
)
=
5
Rhu: Thanks, Radek. That helps a lot.
Radek: But of course.
Amadi:
rolling 1d20
(
10
)
=
10
Radek: If you two haven't got somewhere to be going, I think I'll start working on the hole, now.
(To Ellemerr): Ready to play Eapherod? >.>
(From Amadi): Never, but let's try.
Ganelon: Working on closing it, that is.
(From Amadi): A sane madgod is pretty daunting.
(To Ellemerr): You'll still look and sound like Amadi, but when he pulls you through, you won't be just a fragment anymore. The key is connected to everything, here, and that includes the rest of you, so you'll be talking as the whole. The... yes, sane madgod.
(To Ellemerr): We'll see if anyone even notices the difference. >.>
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You pull Amadi into a pool of pudding, and you both sink into the chocolate.
Gan: The hole in the bag?
Ganelon: I don't expect to make much progress, but I've gotta try it out sometime, right?
Apheori (GM): Certainly.
(From Amadi): The biggest difference will be my even worse slow-ness, I guess. Since I'll be thinking more and asking you questions. Where is this pudding-pool?
(To Ellemerr): In midnight. A pool conjured out of nothing in the black of the space behind space.
(To Ellemerr): The relevance to you, of course, would be that this was, before the whole Eapherod thing, traditionally your realm, the place where only you could really be, because in a way it was everything you... were.
(To Ellemerr): Also something about deathgods. All of yours used this space. You used this space when they failed.
Greibel swims back to the top of the chocolate, spitting out a cartoonish chocolate fountain
Amadi blinks once, and gives Greibel a pleasantly surprised look.
Amadi: Oh, we're here.
Gaurav: Especially when you can conjure up any thing you need to assist in your investigations.
Greibel: We certainly are!
Amadi: I guess that makes you a rather successful Keeper.
Greibel: I saw a flashy light thing! We should go investigate.
Gaurav: Hee, cartoonish chocolate fountain.
Apheori (GM): Gan: What would you like to try?
Do you keep the hole in the bag, for instance?
Ganelon: Oh yes.
We're safer from it that way.
Amadi: As you wish.
Amadi takes Greibel's hand and guides him to the flashy light.
Greibel: Woooooo!
Ganelon: As for what to try...
Apheori (GM): Gravy, Rhu: Any stray thoughts?
The Gravedigger: Hmm.
Gaurav: Nope, Rhu is peering curiously at what Radek is up to. He has a good feeling about this.
Ganelon: From what I understand, the problem is that these holes are connecting places that should not be connected.
But it's not so much a tunnel as it is a... well, hole.
I need to sew the opening closed, or put a patch over it.
I have no idea how to do this when the substance I'm working with is reality.
Gaurav: Are you saying that out loud as Radek?
Apheori (GM): Roll arcana to try something arbitrary.
Frezak (GM): Radek always knows what to do!
Gaurav: And, generally, how to do it with a bang.
Apheori (GM): Amadi leads Greibel into the Room. Possibly through a wall.
Amadi: And here we all are. Marvelous.
Greibel: Convenient!
Rhu jumps
Rhu: Where did you two come from?
Greibel: Would you believe a chocolate pudding swimming pool?
Rhu considers this
Rhu: Probably not, no.
Greibel: Right, we were in the bathroom then
Rhu: That's better. Radek just destroyed a giant fish!
Apheori (GM): What, together?
Kinky.
Bear Soup Guy: If a public restroom in the void of everythingness can be considered romantic, then yes
Rhu: Now he's sitting there mumbling something about sewing.
Greibel: Not sewing fish, I hope.
Rhu shrugs in a "who knows" sort of way, and finds a comfortable corner to sit down in.
Apheori (GM) falls asleep.
Ellemerr: Er
Ellemerr pokes the GM.
Apheori (GM): Sorry. >.<
Radek: Roll to try stuf!
Guys! do things!
Gravy: Say 'Hmm'!
The Gravedigger: Hmm.
Ganelon: Finally, I'm back.
Rhu tries to make a door in the wall again.
Rhu:
rolling d20
(
9
)
=
9
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+12 Hole fixing
(
4
)
+12
=
16
Frezak (GM): Do Irealise that Radek is trying to manipulate reality?
Amadi walks up to Radek, looks at what he's doing, and does things to help. She might also correct him if he's wrong. If I can.
Ganelon: He could certainly use the help.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: The wall seems even more solid.
Amadi: You totally can.
You know everything.
Rhu: Huh.
Rhu taps the overly solid wall in confusion.
Ellemerr: I'll be doing that, then.
Apheori (GM): Radek: It doesn't work, but now you know something not to try. Amadi also shows you something interesting.
Ganelon: Innnnteresting?
(To Amadi): You could also just plain close the hole if you'd like, though it wouldn't be very helpful in the long run.
Apheori (GM): Interesting.
*shifty eyes*
(From Ellemerr): I don't much want to -do- much myself. It's more... getting them to do the right things.
Ganelon: Interesting.
We're all back together, though!
(To Ellemerr): Exactly.
Ganelon: Now we can go somewhere. Does anyone have a preference?
(To Ellemerr): You could do everything yourself, determine the fate of the entire universe from start to finish, of all the universes, but then... what the hell would be the point?
Rhu: What about Sarathi?
Gaurav: sorry ooc
Ellemerr: Leaving? I only just got here!
Ganelon: Is there anything left of Sarathi?
(To Ellemerr): Actually, leaving might be a good idea.
Gaurav: Maybe in orbit around Sarathi, going the other way?
(To Ellemerr): As much as you know this place, as much as it is your own and even arguably a part of you, there's something alien about it, something not right. A feeling as though something is here with you, uninvited, and watching. Should it notice, really notice your party...
(To Ellemerr): Well, that's not an outcome you're familiar with, and generally when you can't see something, that's a very bad sign.
Ganelon: Someone remind me of what our goals are.
Other than visit the pub.
Gaurav: Fix the Holes ... somehow? I guess?
Go back home, eventually. Unless we want to hang about in Everything forever.
Bear Soup Guy: Fix the godlings too, I'd think
Unless they'd prefer not to be fixed
Frezak (GM): Put them in the holes!
Apheori (GM): Take the lot of them and hurl them in!
With a huge load of bombs.
Rhu looks around
Apheori (GM): What could go wrong?
Radek: Alright, godling, we're in your home now. Feeling any more whole?
Rhu: Mrs. Teatime, do you know where Dave is? She came through the hole with me and then ... vanished. I've lost the skull, too.
Rhu thinks of the skull
Apheori (GM): Roll sanity.
Rhu:
rolling d20
(
6
)
=
6
Amadi: Dave is here. The thing you call Dave is hardly anything but a distortion of the real thing, and the name doesn't really apply. I am more than Teatime. We should... probably leave.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You visualise the skull and it appears in your hands, old, marked, but all in all, just a skull. Whatever power there was or should have been, it isn't here. Or was there ever any? You don't know. You don't know what you don't know, either. Oh well.
Rhu: ... here?
Rhu looks around, grasping the skull tightly, and then looking down in surprise when he realises that he has a skull to grasp tightly.
Radek: Leave and go where?
Amadi: I can't tell you that. It'd be... cheating.
Amadi grins.
Radek scowls.
(To Ellemerr): You also may not even want to leave, considering you'll just go back to how you were.
Radek: I can take my research anywhere, but that doesn't make me amenable to wasting my time in transit.
Will we be going somewhere *useful*?
Gaurav: So. We have a Hole in a bag. We know where one other stable Hole is -- near the village/commune place. We know the wizards know something about making a Hole, and we now know how to make a Hole ourself.
Where does that get us?
Ganelon: We need a reliable way to close holes now.
Gaurav: I liked your idea about sewing the Hole shut or patching it with ... reality.
Ganelon: Whatever I tried didn't seem to work, though.
(To Ellemerr): Of course you have these silly things like Duty. Which is horribly ironic. Isn't it?
(From Amadi): Ew.
Gaurav: Hmm. Good point.
Amadi: I do hope we'll go somewhere useful. It's not that I particularly want to leave. I rather like it here. I'm just saying... we probably should.
Gaurav: Whatever the answer to the Holes problem is, I guess we haven't discovered it. Do we have any B-plots to follow? Otherwise, we could just go exploring: back to Arah, or back to the commune, or back to Sarathi.
Hey, we never did figure out the deal with the woman who's house we burned down.
Apheori (GM): You may now have discovered the answer, but there are more things to try, more ways to approach the problem.
not*
Radek: You could try something else. The idea may have been good. What if you used a recipe?
Ganelon: A recipe for closing holes?
Apheori (GM): Why not?
Did you ever make that gumbo?
Bear Soup Guy: trying to think how that would look on a minecraft crafting bench
Gaurav: A recipe for unscrambled eggs.
Ganelon: Nah, it was theoretical.
The gumbo remains unmade, because Radek doesn't eat.
Apheori (GM): Poor gumbo.
Ganelon: The fish was also unmade, though that was for different reasons.
Shall I just... imagine a recipe?
Gaurav: I'd actually like to go to the cottage where Amadi was hanging out. It seems fun, if nuts.
Rhu: We should go to a pub.
Apheori (GM): Imagine and roll.
If you'd like.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+12
(
13
)
+12
=
25
Radek: You always suggest that.
Why don't you just bring the pub here?
Rhu: o.0
I've been trying to imagine a door for the last half hour, and it hasn't worked. I don't think I could imagine a whole pub into existence.
Gaurav: which, of course, means he now things of a door again
Rhu:
rolling d20 door
(
3
)
=
3
Greibel: You just need to open your mind, man.
rolling 1d20 imagine a pub with water-skiing in the basement
(
14
)
=
14
Apheori (GM): A door appears, with a fax machine next to it.
The fax machine prints out a memo.
It makes horrible noises in the process.
Rhu picks up the memo and reads it out loud.
Apheori (GM): "This is a public service announcement. Rhu is insane."
Rhu opens the door and tries to throw the memo outside
Radek scoffs. "That's not /news/."
Apheori (GM): Greibel: Alas, for it didn't seem to work.
The Gravedigger: I'd be surprised if he wasn't.
NO offense, Rhu.
Apheori (GM): The memo dissipates into nothingness as it drifts away.
Rhu: I'm not insane! I'm just ... ooo, pretty.
Rhu watches the memo dissipate.
Greibel: Note to self, don't walk through the door that makes thing evaporate
Gaurav: Is this one of those fax machines that has a phone on it?
Ganelon: How about the recipe I rolled for?
Can I get a memo of that?
Apheori (GM): Gan: Oh, right, sorry.
You get it in the air, unfortunately.
Ganelon: It's no problem.
Apheori (GM): Words appearing in light written on nothing before you.
Ganelon: Eh, I'm reading light right now.
Computers are amazing.
Ellemerr: Word.
Frezak (GM): WORDS
Apheori (GM): The words describe processes on a rather low level.
Arcana to sort out what it even is?
Ganelon: Gladly!
rolling 1d20+12
(
3
)
+12
=
15
Man, I can't get average rolls today.
Frezak (GM): You roll like a tiefling archer.
Ganelon: Apparently.
Gaurav: How does a tiefling archer roll?
Frezak (GM): Poorly.
Very poorly.
Ganelon: Yeah, as evidenced today, in a manner such that his mother would be very disappointed.
Apheori (GM): It's good enough to tell that it's some sort of assembly language. A recipe of instructions.
Ganelon: But one I can't make much sense of?
Well, not right away, at least. Perhaps I could take a picture?
Amadi sighs at Radek. "You're really complicating things, aren't you. Do you need a translation?"
Rhu looks out the door and tries to imagine a path leading away from it, suspended in the Everythingness.
Apheori (GM): Take a picture, write it down, you can make a copy somehow.
Frezak (GM): SOUNDS LIKE TIME TO BRING OUT CODRICHUN THE HELPER
Ganelon: "Helper".
Frezak (GM): Totes a helper.
Radek: I...
Yes, give me a translation.
Greibel makes an expression of mock amazement
Ganelon: Mock amazement?
I'm supposed to be the rude one!
Bear Soup Guy: Give and receive :P
Amadi waves a hand over the glowing words.
Gaurav: Her own hand, I hope.
Ellemerr: *smirks*
Frezak (GM): It's a hand made of cheese.
WHich is of course hers.
Using someone else's cheesehand would be weird.
Apheori (GM): The words shift and change languages, into something a good bit higher level, but also possibly even more confusing.
Gaurav: Hah. One of these days she's going to yank one of our hands off and do something with it.
Apheori (GM): But it looks more like spells and less like... like computer instructions. Where the universe is a computer.
Ganelon: Hmph. Some translation.
But I do know my spellery, too. May I roll again to comprehend it?
Apheori (GM): I thought you wanted something you could use.
What were you expecting, eggs and toast?
Roll.
Ganelon: Radek can totes use computer instructions.
rolling 1d20+12
(
3
)
+12
=
15
Wow, not even different.
Apheori (GM): He can, but some computers are... more complicated than others.
Okay, so you get that it's spells, that they seem... doable, but you can't quite wrap your head around them now.
For the sake of mechanics, let's call it a ritual and you can master it later.
Ganelon: Gladly.
I'll take another picture.
Amadi sighs and gives Radek a disappointed look, waving her hand over it again.
Radek: I'll look over it again later.
You wanted to leave, then?
(From Amadi): Please make it so simplified it's not even useful anymore. :P
Gaurav: Are these instructions for fixing Holes or just an explanation of what Holes are?
Apheori (GM): The words change again, shifting into something larger, but more condensed. A single spell.
...an executable binary.
Apheori (GM) runs.
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Ganelon: Runs for cover?
Apheori (GM): Hiding. >.>
Frezak (GM): TOTAL DEFENSE.
Ganelon: Cowards!
Well, worst case scenario, I dive into my own portable Hole.
I RUN THE EXECUTABLE.
Which is different than running from it.
Gaurav: Worst case scenario, it installs adbars on all your browsers.
Apheori (GM): The executable runs.
What's the arcane equivalent of a library not found error?
Gaurav: The universe divides by zero and crashes.
Ganelon: I feel like most spells are designed without useful things like readable exceptions.
Apheori (GM): Good point.
Okay, so the spell executable runs. Do you run it in general, or at the bag of hole?
Ganelon: Oh, the hole for sure.
Rhu hides behind Gravy again
Ganelon: In general sounds like running a default constructor, which could very well be empty.
Apheori (GM): The hole closes.
The spell crashes.
Radek: You get a horrible migraine and a sense that something was missing.
Very, very missing.
Ganelon: But the hole's closed!?
Frezak (GM): My presence is so useful.
Apheori (GM): It's closed.
Frezak: You may need to carry Radek.
Frezak (GM): CAN DO
Unless you ask me to roll for it.
(To Ellemerr): I was going to make it simplified, but I couldn't think of anything. So I made it broken. >.>
Gaurav: What did the rest of us see/hear when the Hole closed?
Radek: Nnngh. It's... closed.
(To Ellemerr): Also the entity would have noticed that. You would have felt it notice. A sense of impending swarming bad... bad ness?
Amadi sighs again.
Amadi: You should figure out the proper formulae next time. I think I simplified it too much.
(To Ellemerr): Unfortunately in this place it's probably already too late - time is weird and things can have happened whenever as soon as they happen.
Amadi shudders.
Amadi: We really should leave, you know.
Frezak (GM): I'm glad I didn't have to go in again.
Radek: ...Taking a break from thinking. Someone else fix things for a while.
Amadi: ... No... we should already have left.
The Gravedigger: CAN DO.
Apheori (GM): It's too late.
Frezak (GM): He just says 'Can do'.
He doesn't /do/ anything.
Dramatic pose.
Apheori (GM): The room you made dissolves around you, and suddenly the black is blacker, something horrible and hungry closing around you, cutting off the sense of possibility and the strange colours of the place.
Ganelon: Frezak?
I think it might be time.
Frezak (GM): I WILL FIGHT HUNGER WITH DESTRUCTION
Rhu: Rhu clutches at the door handle as it dissolves
Frezak (GM): I will use a Standard action to invoke the aspect of Codrichun.
And send it at the hunger.
BECAUSE I CAN.
Apheori (GM): Amadi: It feels familiar, this hunger against the black. As bad as it is, as alien and unnatural, it's... familiar.
Frezak (GM): ONCE A DAY
EVERY DAY
Amadi is very puzzled. And feels too whole to actually be scared, though she's fairly certain she ought to be.
Gaurav: "the aspect of Codrichun"?
Ganelon: Radek would be talking, possibly asking questions, but instead he's just going to lie down.
Frezak (GM): A cloud of boiling blood and grit that wants nothing more than to destroy and be destroyed.
Ganelon: And scowl at nothing in particular.
Gaurav: HUH
cloud of destruction vs cloud of hunger
Greibel should turn into a cloud of hornets
and then we let the clouds duke it out
Bear Soup Guy: Cloud War 2014
Apheori (GM): Sorry, got a phone call.
OKAY.
There's a horrible hungry expanse of... something, or possibly nothing, surrounding the lot of ye.
Gravy summons a mass of boiling blood.
The boiling blood, what does the boiling blood do, when sent at the hungry expanse?
Frezak (GM): It.... eats.
Apheori (GM): Neeeeat.
Frezak (GM): It eats and destroys and erodes.
It does the terrible un-will of Codrichun.
Apheori (GM): The cloud of boiling grit and bloody erodes at the nothing, pushing it back, devouring the hunger for its own, but also being devoured in turn as it goes. So far it seems to be winning.
What do the rest of you do?
Frezak (GM): Cheer for Codrichun!
Morale bonus!
Bear Soup Guy: Fear for our lives while watching in awe
Gaurav: Is the hunger in one place? Like, can I target whatever the cloud of boiling grit is attacking, or is it all around us?
(To Ellemerr): I suggest getting them all out of there, if you can.
Apheori (GM): It's all around you.
And closing.
There's just this cloud pushing it back...
Frezak (GM): Hey, I've done my bit.
Amadi looks at the fighting things, rising first one eyebrow and then the other and then...
Amadi: Okay. We're outa here.
Amadi does something to make them be outa there.
Radek groans.
Apheori (GM): Suddenly you're all not there.
And you're somewhere else.
Frezak (GM): SWEDEN?!
Apheori (GM): Or are you?
Gaurav: Hmm. Rhu's going to try to hit it with a ... oh. Never mind then.
(To Ellemerr): It just ocurred to me that with the whatever the hell that is around you, attempts to get OUT might not even work. o_O
Ellemerr: Again, Finland is more likely than Sweden.
(From Ellemerr): Er... I can't help you.
Frezak (GM): But I like Sweden!
Bear Soup Guy: That should be Finland's national slogan
"Finland: More likely than Sweden"
Frezak (GM): "Sweden: And you're somewhere else. "
Ellemerr laughs.
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Ellemerr: That's awesome, BSG.
Apheori (GM): For a moment, you're somewhere else. Under a tree, in soft grass in a warm summer breeze...
Frezak (GM): Prime shovelling territory!
Apheori (GM): And then it gets ripped away and you're pulled back into the black, into the HUNGER vs HUNGER deathmatch.
Gaurav: Right.
Frezak (GM): Can I grant some of my life-force (surges) to empower the aspect of Codrichun ?
Apheori (GM): Uh... sure.
Frezak (GM): I do that.
I fuel the Boiling Cloud with Gravy.
Gaurav: 0_0
That was beautiful.
Bear Soup Guy applauds
Apheori (GM): The cloud isn't pushing it back anymore, but it is holding.
Rhu raises his maul and tries to send a Bond of Retribution at the hunger
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+7 Wisdom vs AC
(
4
)
+7
=
11
urk
Apheori (GM): Anyone wanna insight it?
Bear Soup Guy: surely
Radek: Stop making so much noise!
Ellemerr: I like insight!
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20+11 insight
(
11
)
+11
=
22
Ganelon: That sounds like a thing which requires thinking.
So I'll pass.
Apheori (GM): Aye.
Ellemerr: ... I'll leave it to BSG this time.
Bear Soup Guy: Insight with me! We'll bombard it with insight!
Apheori (GM): Greibel: The codrichun thing is a horrible mass of destroyed not-so-horribleness, which seeks to destroy and devour everything it has lost - or at least everything remotely reminiscent of it.
Greibel: And you get the sense that what surrounds you, what it is fighting, is the exact same thing.
Or something.
Gaurav: o.0
Apheori (GM): Rhu's attack failed, incidentally.
The codrichun thing pushes it back more, devouring more and growing.
Gaurav: I guess that means it's not hittable, although I also like the idea of a hunger manifested as darkness strapping on some armour before taking on adventurers.
Apheori (GM): You can't actually tell if the darkness is getting any smaller, though.
Maybe, maybe not.
Rhu: We need Dave. Or Hazz'. Or both.
Apheori (GM): What would happen if you tried to strap armour on the mass of boiling blood?
Rhu prays to Hazz.
Apheori (GM): All you have is Amadi.
Amadi: You have Dave. Silly.
Apheori (GM): And codrichun!
Frezak (GM): CODRICHUUUUUUN
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+9 religion check praying for assistance or Dave or both
(
14
)
+9
=
23
Amadi: And we really don't need this to be a dead end. Really.
Greibel: I'd like to echo that sentiment.
(To Ellemerr): His prayer probably empowers you slightly, since you are Dave. Really Dave. The real one. And they don't even understand.
Apheori (GM): The codrichun thing is still pushing the hunger back, getting bigger.
Radek: Just... jump into the hole.
S'safe now.
Apheori (GM): Which hole?
Ganelon: His portable hole, of course.
The pocket dimension.
Now that it is hole-less, we should be able to exist there without being in any immediate danger.
Frezak (GM): I DIVE INTO THE HOLE
Because Radek said so.
Ganelon: Your unwavering faith in me is quite heartwarming.
Frezak (GM): That's Gravy for you.
Ganelon: He's such a nice guy!
Frezak (GM): Aside from invoking aspects of tragic, corrupted Primodials.
Ganelon: Well, you're being meaner by helping it win when it wants to lose.
Frezak (GM): I know! :D
Gaurav: It wants to lose?
Apheori (GM): Right, the hole in the bag closed.
Ganelon: Codrichun is a tragic figure - he wants to die.
But he's lost all hope of actually being able to do so.
Apheori (GM): Oh, don't worry. He may be winning now, but there's basically no way he can actually win here.
...I hope.
Okay, so Gravy dives in the rope. What about the rest of you? Does Radek even have the strength?
Ellemerr: Sure, I'm following... actually, let me know what everyone else says first.
Ganelon: He rolls in.
Like he's getting out of bed.
Rhu: (to Greibel and Amadi) After you?
Greibel plugs his nose and jumps in
Amadi follows Greibel.
Rhu goes in last
Rhu: (whispering a prayer to Hazz'ridan as he goes)
Bear Soup Guy: Are we able to close the thing from inside of it?
Ganelon: I don't think so. That would be dangerous anyways.
Apheori (GM): You're all in a pocket dimension, which still smells faintly of dragon.
Ganelon: We'd have no way back out that didn't involve more horrible shenanigans involving holes and digging through the fabric of reality.
Apheori (GM): Now what?
Frezak (GM): Now we have lunch.
(From Ellemerr): Is... this still Midnight? O_o
Ganelon: I'm afraid that aside from providing this exit, there's not much Radek is in a state to assist with.
(To Ellemerr): You're technically still in midnight, but the pocket dimension is also kind of iffy and should let you actually escape.
(To Ellemerr): After which point you'd be back to normal.
Apheori (GM): Man, the hunger keeps getting horrible rolls.
Bear Soup Guy: What resources and environment do we have in this pocket dimension? And will the cloud eventually get to our hole?
Gaurav: yay! go away, stupid hunger.
Apheori (GM): At this rate, Codrichun might win.
Gaurav: heh.
Ganelon: I have not stocked my pocket dimension with anything.
Apheori (GM): MMM, maNGO.
Ganelon: Amadi might be able to provide confections.
Amadi: Well, this place is less... er... we could totally leave from here. Probably. I'm not sure I can... take the rope with us. That might get iffy. But we might still want to leave.
Greibel sits and rummages through his pack for something to smoke
Rhu walks around a bit, assuming there's a floor to walk around on.
Ganelon: Radek does not offer up a tremendous amount of resistance to the possibility of losing his rope.
Pocket dimensions are incredibly useful, but he got the hole out of it so it's mostly just around for storage.
And you know, he wants to be alive more than he wants to keep anything in his possession.
Except his genius. That stays, or else.
Apheori (GM): Sorry, arms got covered in mango.
Gaurav: HA
Apheori (GM): And then I sliced my finger open by running into a knife.
Gaurav: oof!
Apheori (GM): Amadi: Do you rescue everyone?
Ellemerr: If all they do is sit/walk around... yes.
Apheori (GM): There are strange noises coming from the opening,
Amadi attempts getting outa there again.
Apheori (GM): Would you like to rescue them to anywhere in particular?
(To Amadi): Okay, it looks like Codrichun wins. This is really bad for them, because it means they will now be perceived as a real threat... XD
(To Amadi): Having summoned something that devoured an entire chunk of.. it.
Ellemerr: Er... *shifty eyes*
Do they have wishes?
Gaurav: Rhu's focussed on the ominous sounds and trying to figure out what's going on out there and if he can do anything, so, not me.
The hunger might also follow us elsewhere, which might be bad.
Can we lure it into the Hole near the village?
Ganelon: Er.
Ellemerr: Well, I'm not asking IC.
It's more, do people have anywhere they'd like to go?
Ganelon: Actually yeah, that hole and the car would be nice places to revisit.
Gaurav: Lure it to the town with all the policemen. They'll arrest it for loitering.
Ellemerr: Okay.
Ganelon: Since I just fixed my stable hole, having another one to fix better would be great.
Ellemerr: I'll aim for that, then.
Well, not for the hole itself. But that general area.
Ganelon: Yeah.
Apheori (GM): Okay!
Once again, you're all suddenly not where you were.
Now you're somewhere else. And down a rope of holding.
Gaurav: Any change in the ominous sounds?
Apheori (GM): Something was getting devoured. You don't know details, and when you leave, the sounds are cut off entirely.
So yeah.
Now you're somewhere else.
I'll tell you all about it next time.
Ganelon: Does that mean we're ending for today?
Ellemerr: Sort of sounds like it.
Bear Soup Guy: Good spot for it.
Frezak (GM): UNless we swim in MYSTERY
Gaurav: Today started with Greibel swimming in chocolate, so there would be a nice symmetry there.
Bear Soup Guy: mmmm
delicious mystery
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Love you all bye.
Gaurav: Take care! Thanks for a great game, everybody!
Bear Soup Guy: adios all

Session 27

Apheori (GM): Okay, so you're all here and I'm still sober enough to type.
Shall we actually start?
Ganelon: I suppose we shall.
Apheori (GM): Gravy, Greibel, Rhu, and Radek: You wake up slowly. It's a pleasant place, and there's no real rush - it's warm, the grass is soft and cool, there's a nice breeze, and unless you hate trees, the leaves overhead are quite nice as well.
It's the middle of the afternoon somewhere (at least it feels like it) and you're under that tree you were almost under before again.
Gaurav: "almost under before again"?
oh, the giant tree with the little tree growing out of it?
Apheori (GM): No, no, this is a regular tree in a field.
Nice big tree, but nothing holey about it.
Unfortunately.
Amadi: You're not sure where you are. You remember... being someone else, something more whole, yadda yadda. I have no idea what you make of that, but now there's also something poking you in the face repeatedly telling you to wake up, come on, wake up.
Radek: I hate trees.
Ganelon: (How could I resist?)
Gaurav: hmm, okay. Rhu's going to take the opportunity for some well-deserved unconsciousness.
Amadi bats a hand at the pokey whatnot and makes annoyed do-not-disturb sounds.
Gaurav: Gan: is it the bark? Stupid freaking bark.
Ganelon: It's how they /litter/ all over the place.
Gaurav: Urk, yes, that too. And all that oxygen just oozing out everywhere.
Ganelon: Leaves bloody everywhere in autumn, pinecones, pine /needles/... there is no such thing as a living three that doesn't leave junk everywhere for you to pick up.
Apheori (GM): Per skype, let's come back to this in 20.
Ganelon: Tree, rather.
Apheori (GM): And don't forget the fruit.
Crabapples are horrible.
Ganelon: Yeah. And Radek could synthesize oxygen or get it imported from somewhere. He doesn't need TREES to make it for him.
Frezak (GM): I will pat the tree.
Nice tree.
I do'nt think I have treespeak.
At best I can talk to it how great corpses are.
And dirt.
Good 'ole dirt.
Ganelon: It probably appreciates corpses.
Frezak (GM): I'm pretty sure it's firmly grounded in the many uses of dirt.
Ganelon: Well, Radek's probably still warming up to the idea of using his brain again.
Frezak (GM): What, as a the locus for eldritch powers?
Ganelon: No, just as a tool for thought.
Because, headaches.
Apheori (GM): The tree is very solid.
Frezak (GM): Can't you protect it with your magic snowglobe?
Ganelon: My head?
Bear Soup Guy: ZING
Frezak (GM): I don't think you have a plasteel skull yet.
Apheori (GM): Amadi: The pokey thing continues to poke, more insistently now. You hear someone (it might be Dave) saying, come on, you need to wake up and dream.
Ganelon: The shielding artifact shields against energy, not pain.
High-energy, too. I don't think it would stop, say, the cold.
Amadi: I -am- awake. Stop bugging me.
Dave: Are you? Oh.
Well, fuck.
Frezak (GM): Cold is technically negative energy.
Amadi: See, I told me I was fine without me. Er.
Amadi mutters.
Apheori (GM): Amadi: You and Dave are in some big fancy hall-type place. It's very empty. Dave has a stick.
Ellemerr: Any bugs?
Ganelon: Yeah, so it should get through, unless the thing protects against extremes whether they're positive or negative.
Apheori (GM): Bugs in what sense?
Oh, on the stick?
Sadly no.
She was just poking you with it.
Not holding bugs.
Very unfortunate.
Frezak (GM): That's a rubbish stick.
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Bear Soup Guy: I hope that's a stick literally made of garbage and not just a crappy stick
Gaurav: Someone take the stick away from Dave before she kills again!
Frezak (GM): Can Greibel turn into birds and see where we are?
Just fly up and look down?
Or one big bird.
A midget Roc
Amadi: We were when. But then there were angry eaty things and we had to go and now we're not even we. Where'd we send the others?
Bear Soup Guy: He /could/ do that if we need to know
Ganelon: By all means, sir.
Never hesitate to abuse your awesome druidic powers.
Frezak (GM): Otherwise I will have to use gravyvision to see through trees.
And that's really rude.
Bear Soup Guy: There's hesitation and then there's laziness :P
Amadi: phone
Frezak (GM): I could throw you!
If that helps!
Dave: I have... no idea. Something about tesseracts. And possibly a squid.
Frezak (GM): I love to help!
Dave: You were supposed to wake up with THEM, not here.
Frezak (GM): Gimme 8 hours of rest and I can summon Codrichun again!
He LOVES to help!
Apheori (GM): Actually, you may have rested.
Greibel turns into a majestic flock of white doves in a flash, flying into a whirlwind of feathers and fluttering, ascending the air around until reaching a suitable height and all breaking off from each other in tandem, flying into a surveillance pattern in the sky, soaring and drifting through the breeze, taking in the surroundings
Apheori (GM): I mean, you all passed out from the transition. Why not count it as rest?
Ganelon: Oh boy.
Frezak (GM): WOO-HOO
Apheori (GM): Oh look, competent Greibel!
Ganelon: Codrichun could surely solve this problem.
Apheori (GM): He's clearly coming off his drugs.
Bear Soup Guy: It's the good air in this place
Apheori (GM): But seriously, he, uh, sees stuff.
Frezak (GM): Quick, radek FIX HIM
Ganelon: I think he knows better than I how to fix himself when it comes to drugs.
Amadi: Supposed to, huh.
Apheori (GM): Like, lots of countryside. Farms. Roads. Some villages. A suspicious group of possibly cultists gathered around a large bonfire. Woods. Creeks. A guy arguing with a tree. A very dead-looking dark expanse with some kind of purpley shimmer in the air.
Amadi gives a little giggle.
Frezak (GM): CULTISTS
Ganelon: Dark expanses!?
I love those!
Frezak (GM): Any of these things look familiar?
Apheori (GM): A dove or two actually flies into the expanse and suddenly get cut off from the swarm and fall to their deaths.
Frezak (GM): From when were scouting in Car?
Apheori (GM): The cultists are chanting something horrible.
There is no sign of anything you saw before.
Frezak (GM): AWESOME
I have terrible Will! :D
I can use an AP to charge... 120feet in six seconds.
Apheori (GM): There are some folks on one of the roads. The technology level looks a bit better than what you saw in Coffle.
Frezak (GM): Bah.
Poor car.
Apheori (GM): It should be noted that Greibel is really spread out and this is a lot of area that he has scouted just because.
Frezak (GM): WHo navigated us here?
Apheori (GM): Amadi.
Dave: This is serious, you know. If we're stuck here, there's no way out.
Don't ask how I know that. I don't know if I know that.
Amadi: Oh, right. Serious. Of course it is.
Amadi giggles some more.
Frezak (GM): Hey. Can Radek make us magic shizzle before we go anywhere,
*?
Ganelon: He should have made it a while ago, we just never decided on what it was.
I think you wanted a Chainreach Shovel?
Dave watches Amadi worriedly, then suddenly leans forward and shouts in her face, "WAKE UP!"
Frezak (GM): PLEASE
Apheori (GM): Amadi: You can roll to wake up, or you can not wake up. It's up to you.
Ellemerr: Oh, sure.
rolling 1d20
(
2
)
=
2
Heeee
Apheori (GM): Heeeee.
Amadi: I AM AWAKE YOU DOLT!
Dave: RIGHT!
Amadi grumps for a bit, then giggles some more.
Dave: I KNOW!
Dave mutters, "Doesn't mean you can't wake up again."
Apheori (GM): What's a chainreach shovel?
Frezak (GM): it's a shovel that once a day can reach 25 feet away.
Apheori (GM): Whoah.
Ganelon: And knock a guy prone.
Frezak (GM): As a minor action, too.
Ganelon: So, sure. We can say you have one of those.
Frezak (GM): So Gravy can, flavour-wise, throw his shovel at a guy, run, have the shovel scoop a guy off his ffeet and return to him in time for gravy to bury the guy.
Ganelon: And it was one of the things Radek spent dust on before everything went to shit. Again.
Frezak (GM): More shit.
Ganelon: It's most of what you end up shoveling, in this campaign.
Frezak (GM): So. Cultists? Or magic hazeplace?
There is a lot of it, yes;
Apheori (GM): First off you need to find out about them. Get Greibel back. Talk to him.
The Gravedigger: GREIBEEEEEEEEEL
WHAT DO YOU BIRD EYES SEE?
YOUR MANY, MANY BIRD EYES?
Apheori (GM): And bird brains.
Frezak (GM): Many, many bird brains.
it's a network.
A bird hive mind.
FlockTech (tm)
Gaurav: PigeonRank
Frezak (GM): Avian-Net
Greibel 's individual birds swoop back down all focusing on a single point and hitting it simultaneously, coalescing into a large explosion of white light and energy that blows at the leaves on various plants like a warm influx of stormy weather, morphing into the shape of Greibel once more
Frezak (GM): GullPuteTech
Apheori (GM): Fancy.
The Gravedigger: Fancy.
Rhu: (weakly) Woo!
Greibel: I've been saving that.
Radek groans from his position on the floor.
Greibel: So, we've got lots of wooded area, some small villages and farms, some weird looking cultist guys
And also there's sort of a worrying dark expanse of purple dead stuff
Might want to stay away from that
Gaurav: Cultist guys?
Apheori (GM): Okay, you guys didn't rest when you passed out. I just decided that. You'll still need to, if you need it.
The Gravedigger: Not friendly dread stuff?
Gaurav: brb 5 mins
Apheori (GM): Amadi: Do you just sit there giggling, then?
Greibel: Friendly Dread, that was the name of my reggae band in college.
The Gravedigger: Sounds rad.
Ellemerr: Sorry. Things.
Er.
Radek: Laaaaame.
Amadi: Oh, fine, fine. Where are we? Where did we put them? And if I have to wake up more to get us there, I might need some more time.
Ganelon: He's still lying down, just so you know.
Frezak (GM): I'll pick him up if we decided where we're going.
Cultists?
Willages?
DREAD DIRE FELL SPACE OF BADNESS?
OF DOOM?
Ganelon: The cultists and the doom could easily be related to each other.
Either way I'm sure we'll have a marvelous time.
Frezak (GM): I see cultist tea-parties in our future.
Dave: Not more, AGAIN. First you wake up, then you wake up again. Except I think it might be broken. We are broken, you know.
Ganelon: But uh... well, Radek's going to be an insufferable grump no matter what.
Dave: And I don't think they wound up where they were supposed to.
Frezak (GM): Oh, so it's going to be murder.
Ganelon: He might actually SLEEP the next time we take a rest, too.
Apheori (GM): Wow.
Ganelon: Headaches suck, my friend.
Amadi: ... Oh.
Amadi looks disappointed.
Amadi: I thought we could do things!
Frezak (GM): If Radek asks we /could/ just camp for a bit.
Gaurav: back! sorry. work reared its ugly head.
Ganelon: But I don't know. I vote against the magic zone because you'll probably ask him to do something.
Amadi: She! Us! She should be full of... powernessyness!
Frezak (GM): Gravy feels fine because it takes a ton to wear him down.
Ganelon: And he's not in much of a mood to do a lot of complex arcana-ing.
Amadi makes a face.
Rhu: (to Greibel, without getting up but poking the air randomly) What did these cultists look like? Maybe I know them.
Greibel shrugs
Greibel: Just some hooded guys sitting around a fire
Dave: She is! Or were?
We're not quite qualified at the best of times, you know. Not to fight it. It's why we made...
Dave suddenly stops and clutches her head.
Frezak (GM): WYVERNS?
WAS SHE GOING TO SAY WYVERNS?
Rhu gets as many details out of Greibel without getting up, then tries to remember if these cultists sound familiar at all.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+9 religion check, cultist identification
(
10
)
+9
=
19
Amadi: Fighting is bad.
So, er...
Amadi looks around to see if she knows where she is.
Apheori (GM): Details: Lots of blue and black, some bones involved, quite a few beards and somewhat odd skin.
They sound like necromancers.
Frezak (GM): Ooooh
Wait.
I don't like necromancers.
Gaurav: I assume that Rhu's anti-undead powers suggests that the cult of Hazz'ridan looks unkindly upon those who would disturb the sleep of the dead?
Apheori (GM): Amadi: The place looks familiar, with high stone walls and big windows streaming light in motes of dust or whatever the hell the wording is. There are tall pillars either acting as supports or decoration. It's hard to tell.
The actually identifying features seem to be missing, though. The floor is barren, and the place is empty, just the home of dust and light and... more dust?
Rhu gets up, leaning against the tree for support.
Rhu: We really have to stop getting blown onto random planets, it can't be good for us.
Apheori (GM): Amadi: Also there doesn't seem to be a door. There should be a door. A big gate, in fact, just over there. But there isn't.
The Gravedigger: I don't think this whole job is good for us.
Ganelon: Well, Hazz can't appreciate people being rescued from their ultimate dead-ends by becoming zombies.
Right?
Apheori (GM): Zombies end too.
Ganelon: Yeah, but it's cheating the body out of an end Hazz made for it.
Amadi goes over and tries pushing the door-that-isn't open, with all her convinceness that there should be a door.
Apheori (GM): Unless it is the end Hazz made.
Ganelon: True.
Apheori (GM): Zombies do, after all, back things into corners...
Frezak (GM): Ehhhhh
Ganelon: Perhaps this is a subject of intense debate among the religion.
Gaurav: Zombies bring about other ends.
And they're great fertiliser.
Hazz' appreciates a good tree.
Apheori (GM): Amadi: You go and push. Then suddenly there's a gaping hole in the floor where the entire door fell through, and you fall as well, out of the light, into the black.
Who's sitting and who's standing?
Ganelon: Radek is lying down.
Gaurav: Rhu is standing, supporting himself against the tree as he waits for the world to stop spinning.
Frezak (GM): Gravy is standing.
Gaurav: I think this would be pretty clear to Hazz' worshippers: if you're more interested in death than ends, the Church of the God of the Death (I can't remember who that is in our pantheon?) is still open 24x7.
Apheori (GM): Teleoth, probably.
Nice guy. Knows his spatulas.
Amadi: I always liked Teleoth.
Ellemerr: Er. OOC. Probably.
Ganelon: Amadi kind of blurs the line there anyways.
Ellemerr: I know. :3
Gaurav: Maybe the undead spells is just because Hazz' worshippers tend to have missions around undead, like you get yellow fever vaccinations before going to certain countries.
Ellemerr: But she's generally less fond of gods than me.
Bear Soup Guy: Sorry, Greibel's standing
Apheori (GM): Probably.
Okay.
Radek: Amadi is suddenly lying on top of you.
Amadi: You wake up on Radek.
Radek: Hello, Amadi.
Amadi makes hurting waking up noises.
Amadi: ... So /that's/ what she meant.
Radek: So /pleased/ that you could join us.
Rhu steps back in surprise and right into the tree.
Frezak (GM): I want to insight Radek.
rolling 1D20+3
(
6
)
+3
=
9
I believe him.
Apheori (GM): The tree drops a squirrel on Rhu's head.
XD
Frezak (GM): OATH OF ENMITY ON THE SQUIRREL
SEAR IIIIIT
SEAAAAAR IT
Amadi: Hmm. Me too, young'un. Nice beard, byt the way.
Apheori (GM): The squirrel claws and panics and clings to Rhu's head and chitters warningly at everyone else.
Rhu brushes the twigs off my shirt, as -- presumably -- the squirrel does the same while perched on my head.
Gaurav: Ah, no, let's go for realism, why not.
Rhu panics and tries to brush the squirrel off.
Rhu: Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah!
Radek: ...Just get off of me.
Frezak (GM): I MARK THE SQUIRREL
Greibel: It's like you've never seen an animal before we were sent on this mission.
The Gravedigger: HAVE AT THEE, SQUIRREL.
YOUR DOOM IS HERE.
Greibel:
rolling 1d20+13 nature squirrel to calm it
(
16
)
+13
=
29
Amadi considers responding to the squirrel, but kindly rolls off Radek instead. Then, sounding slightly annoyed, declares:
Amadi: This ground is hard. It should've had a beard too.
Gaurav: Does all the jumping, shouting and calming get the squirrel off of me?
Ganelon: Amen to that, godling.
The Gravedigger: It's call Moss, tiny godbit.
This is bald ground.
Maybe it shaved.
Apheori (GM): The squirrel calms and watches Greibel curiously, now placidly perched on Rhu's head.
Rhu freezes in place, confused by the sudden lack of movement from the thing on his head
Apheori (GM): Rhu's head is bleeding from the clinging the squirrel did when he was jumping around.
Rhu: Is it a squirrel? What's it doing?
Amadi sits up and looks around for 1) where they are 2) who is there and 3) why Dave stopped poking her and stuff.
Gaurav: oof. how many hit points do I lose?
Greibel: It's definitely a squirrel and it's probably wondering why you're so afraid of it.
It's had meals that were less afraid.
Although, truthfully, they /are/ herbivores...
Bear Soup Guy: Yes I did just look that up on wikipedia
(To Amadi): You're under a tree in a field, this is Cerris (the same world/plane as Coffle is on), and you're quite certain that this is a future that never happened. Something really messed up.
(To Amadi): Dave is not here, but you can sort of feel her in the back of your mind. You could pull her here, or Elia, if you so chose.
Ganelon: You needed to look it up?
What meat is a squirrel realistically going to hunt? Mice?
Bear Soup Guy: I was thinking insects :/
Ganelon: ...Fair enough.
Frezak (GM): BUGS
(To Amadi): You see Greibel (in resplendent colour, but missing part of himself), Rhu (as confused and oblivious as ever, bless him), Gravy (tall and solid and certain of the world), and Radek (who really, really needs to rest, or it might do permanent damage, whatever it is... but he looks funny colours, not quite healthy).
Bear Soup Guy: Besides, I read an article the other day about a fish that eats fish ten times its size
Apheori (GM): Squirrels will eat mice if they can.
Amadi looks puzzled.
Amadi: Huh. Does that mean we're still sort of... us? Her? Or that we will be, if this ever happens...
Frezak (GM): A fish with a harpoon gun.
Bear Soup Guy: This is terribly impractical as it distends the smaller fish's stomach and it looks like the bigger one is pretty well capable of escaping
(To Amadi): Except if it happens, you never will come back together, because now it is too late. The key, the main key, the one that would bring all the other keys together, is gone. This is a possibility that must never come to pass.
(To Amadi): Not that there's any indication what the hell you can do about it NOW, of course.
Apheori (GM): Gaurav: You lose 4.
Amadi puts a hand over Radek's eyes.
Amadi: That's good enough, lad. For now. Ew, now. Not good at all. Try to wake up in the past, will you?
Radek: If only.
Rhu reaches up and tries to grab the squirrel as gently as I can.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+2 vs reflex
(
11
)
+2
=
13
Apheori (GM): The squirrel falls off Rhu's head as he tries to grab it, and then scampers back up the tree.
Amadi: No, really. You need to sleep and it would fix so much.
Frezak (GM): I bet Radek could shoot it.
Radek: Yes. Sure.
Rhu: Sleep! I like this plan. 's the perfect weather for a little nap anyway ...
Ganelon: That isn't sarcasm for once.
He's amenable to the idea of being unconscious.
Frezak (GM): I CAN HELP
Amadi: Great! Let's all try to dream backwards!
Greibel: Well, if you say so
Greibel reaches into his bag for some kind of hallucinogenic substance
Amadi is not sure that's what she wanted.
Gaurav: Should we post sentries? Or are we unlikely to get attacked in this peaceful looking meadow?
Amadi is not sure she knows exactly what she wants.
Apheori (GM): Attack doesn't look likely, but you also don't actually know where you are.
Greibel didn't see anyone particularly hostile-looking.
Ellemerr: If you're asking me, I'd say it's probably not needed, and if you ask Amadi she will say ALL SLEEP! NOW!
So there's that.
Gaurav: Sounds good to me.
Rhu leans against the tree and falls asleep almost immediately.
Apheori (GM): Do you all sleep?
Ganelon: I sleep.
Bear Soup Guy: I begin my descent into psychedelia and then sleep
Radek gathers up his beard and tries to bury his face in it like a pillow.
Frezak (GM): Is anyone even thinking of standing watch?
Ganelon: Not me!
Ellemerr: Amadi looks like she's sitting watch. She's watching everyone, at any rate.
Gaurav: Nope. I think this might be a reaction to our perception defying trip into everythineness just now.
But look closely and you'll see she's painted eyes on the eyelids.
on her* eyelids
Ellemerr: Moving paint.
That looks at you not matter where you move.
Gaurav: Eeks
Gaurav runs and hides
Apheori (GM): Do whatever you wind up doing. I'll be right back.
Frezak (GM): Well, I only need a big rest to recharge my demon summoning.
Says the Warden.
Defender of nature;
Ellemerr: If you don't go to sleep, Amadi will come over and poke you and put her hands over your eyes and tell you to dream.
Frezak (GM): How would she reach?
Ellemerr: Climb onto his shoulders. Probably with his help.
Frezak (GM): Okay I will assist your Athletics to climb.
If you roll.
Ellemerr:
rolling 1d20
(
14
)
=
14
Frezak (GM): I would say that Gravy is a Rough Surface.
So I will admit defeat.
And go to bed.
Ellemerr: Heee
Frezak (GM): POssibly by just falling 90° and lying flat down and suddenly sleeping.
Gaurav: Sideways, forwards or backwards? I'm wondering what sort of marks your horns would make, and whether someone could use that to track us.
Ellemerr: xD
I hope he doesn't fall on Amadi.
Frezak (GM): Backwards.
Amadi can hold onto his horns as he falls.
Apheori (GM): Riding him down.
Ellemerr: Right. If that's everyone sleeping, Amadi will concentrate very hard on guiding them all backwards and wake up at the proper time. She might fall asleep in order to do this.
Apheori (GM): I want sanity checks from all of you.
Ellemerr:
rolling 1d20
(
3
)
=
3
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20
(
2
)
=
2
Rhu:
rolling d20 dreams of sanity
(
3
)
=
3
Bear Soup Guy: How fortunate!
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
20
)
=
20
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20
(
13
)
=
13
Ganelon: Aw, I wanted to join the 3 club.
Frezak (GM): You are such a grump.
Gaurav: Radek has sucked all our sanity into himself and sees everything with perfect clarity.
Frezak (GM): I dream soundly of dark dreams of dirt and holes.
He is the beacon of reason.
CDG!
Ganelon: And Codrichun?
Do you dream of him?
Frezak (GM): I hope not.
Apheori (GM): Wouldn't you?
Rhu dreams of squirrels.
Frezak (GM): That does not seem conductive to restful sleep.
Apheori (GM): Restful takes many forms.
Rhu: I rolled a 3. I'll be grateful just to get my HP back up to full.
Frezak (GM): Codrichun is not one of them.
Eh, Radek could have healed you.
For only 4 damage.
Pfff
Gaurav: Sleep does reset HP and surges/day, right?
Ganelon: Yes.
If you actually get six hours in.
Apheori (GM): Yup.
Okay.
Gaurav: Gan: cool, thanks!
Apheori (GM): Greibel and Rhu: You wake up with Amadi. It's night. There is no tree, and instead you are on something of a hill. You feel like you had some very interesting dreams, but don't really remember them for whatever reason.
Gaurav: Did Rhu get six hours of sleep?
Frezak (GM): Dammit, Gan, we should have twinned 20s.
Ganelon: Don't blame *me*.
Apheori (GM): Radek and Gravy: You wake up in the morning under the tree. You feel kind of hungover. Dave is standing slightly off watching the sunrise.
Y'all got enough sleep.
Ganelon: How's the headache?
The Gravedigger: Oh, shit.
It's DaveNotDave.
Apheori (GM): Not incapacitating. Just annoying and not conducive to being pleasant.
Frezak (GM): Does this feel like the same reality I went to sleep in?
Ganelon: Lovely.
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Frezak (GM): DO we see Rhu and Greibel?
Radek: ...Yes, and no-one else.
Apheori (GM): Nope.
Rhu: Hmm.
Frezak (GM): I try my radio.
Rhu looks around the hill
Dave looks back and notices Gravy and Radek are awake.
Dave: Oh! You're awake. That's...
...not good.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+14 perception check
(
7
)
+14
=
21
The Gravedigger: What ever is.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: It's dark. Night. The air is nice. You perceptioning anything in particular?
Dave: Some things are. Everyone together would have been good. We're not supposed to be here.
Gaurav: Signs of life and civilisation, I guess. Which at night would mean lights.
I assume Amadi's eyelid paint is both moving and glows-in-the-dark?
Radek: Oh, is it time to take another trip through the dimensions so soon?
Apheori (GM): It's a low hill, and there are trees in the distance around the field, so you can't see too far. The grass looks dead, like autumn, and the shapes of branches confirm it...
Radek: What's wrong with here? Here looks like a safe place to work.
The Gravedigger: Ugh.
Dimensions.
Amadi looks around to see if everyone got through nicely.
Amadi: ... Drat.
Apheori (GM): Although You can see a few lights through the branches.
Frezak (GM): radio?
Amadi tries to discern if this is even where she wanted to go. Or at least an improvement.
Gaurav: Do the trees in the distance look sort of like the tree that attacked me with a squirrel earlier?
Greibel: This is what happens
This is what happens when we go to sleep in a strange field, Rhu
Take this down for future references
Apheori (GM): Nope.
Frezak (GM): Hey, you have pants.
Big win.
Rhu opens his mouth to complain, then thinks better of it and takes this down.
Apheori (GM): Amadi: It's an improvement. Much closer, and probably good enough. You just lost the others... and Dave. You can sort of feel her, there, but not...
Frezak: Radio only gets Radek.
Frezak (GM): HEY RADEK
YOU HERE?
Rhu: We should head towards the light. If we set up camp and wake for daybreak, Dave will probably shout at me again for slacking off.
Frezak (GM): I discreetly check that radioing Radek actually gets through to the grump beside me.
And not some other Radek.
Ganelon: GRUMPS TO HORNS
YOU'RE COMING IN LOUD AND CLEAR.
Frezak (GM): HORN TO GRUMPS
GOOD.
OVER AND OUT.
Rhu: (to Amadi) Where are we?
Do you have any idea how we could get back to the others?
Apheori (GM): It gets through to the grump beside you.
Amadi: Closer to where we should be. I think I lost the others, though. Too unsound dreamers, or... oh. I think I lost Dawn with them. Poor dears.
The Gravedigger: Am I going to have to dig again?
Radek: I thought you lived for that.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: Add the skull back to your inventory. You may or may not actually know it's there, though.
The Gravedigger: I live for digging graves.
Tunneling through that-which-is isn't on my resumé.
Dave: Do you ever dig up graves?
Rhu: Apparently, I imagined a skull in Midnight and it appeared. Can I replace that with Elia?
Gaurav: oops ooc sorry
The Gravedigger: What? No!
I tend to bury those who try to.
Dave: So you can't bury us and then dig us out in the past?
The Gravedigger: I don't know.
Amadi: Elia is...
The Gravedigger: It sounds a tad risky.
Amadi feels around her head.
Radek: I'm not letting him bury me.
Apheori (GM): Actually I guess that is Elia now.
IT just... wasn't, before.
Yeah. >.>
Amadi: ... Keep the skull.
The Gravedigger: Wow, thanks Radek.
That means a lot.
I'm only a DIGGER OF GRAVES.
It's like i know ANYTHING about BURIAL.
Radek: Don't talk like you wouldn't do it without my permission once I died, anyways.
Dave: Wait until we're dead, then.
The Gravedigger: Oh, hells yes.
You stop kicking, in you go.
Rhu: Er, okay.
So where do we go for here? Should we go look for the others, or try to figure out where we are now?
Ellemerr: "Shouldn't take but a moment."
Greibel: Doesn't look like there's much for us here...
Amadi: Well, we don't want to go where the others are. We want them to come here.
Frezak (GM): ONe day Gravy is going to see a field of dead people.
And go Jackpot!
Ganelon: "I've always dreamed this day would come!"
"Better hurry up before the looters arrive."
Rhu: Are they nearby? We could lead them here, or Greibel could bird-up and fly over and give them directions or something.
Frezak (GM): No, wait for the looters.
AND BURY THEM TOO.
Rhu: Hey, weren't we running away from something? Some sort of hunger? Where did that go?
Amadi: They're probably still where we were. Which... is not good.
Frezak (GM): I'LL BURY THEM ALL
THEY SAID I WAS MAS
I'LL SHOW THEM
I CAN TAKE THEM ALL
Amadi: Oh, that's probably still at Midnight. Which... might also be a bad thing.
Amadi looks a little worried.
Rhu: (to Greibel) Do you still have your radio? I broke mine on Arah.
Frezak (GM): THEY WILL ALL KNOW THE COLD DARK EMBRACE OF THE EA- why are you looking at me like that, guys?
Greibel hands the radio over to Rhu
Greibel: You can keep that, never seems to come in very handy
Ganelon: "Oh, no reason."
Rhu tries to call up Radek or Gravy on the radio.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+4 arcana to use electronics
(
20
)
+4
=
24
Amadi was reaching into her pockets and now pulls out an old-fashioned beach radio. Then looks at Greibel's little gadget and goes "Oh."
Apheori (GM): Rhu succeeds in not breaking the radio.
Frezak (GM): Rhu gains the Ham Radio Certificate.
It just appears.
Gaurav: YES
Apheori (GM): And... uh... turns it on.
Gaurav: Is it a slice of ham?
Apheori (GM): And establishes that there are a few signals available.
Rhu: Signals! There must be, er, beings around.
Frezak (GM): Scribed Ham/
Apheori (GM): They have names like 'Fred' and 'GEORGIEGIBBONSPRIVATE' and 'faceman22'. None of them look familiar.
Gaurav: hahahahaha
Apheori (GM): Except maybe Fred.
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Gaurav: Is it possible to listen in without announcing our presence?
Ellemerr: what's a beach radio?
Ellemerr: The battery kind that you take to the beach.
Ganelon: I love looking at Wifi networks, I won't lie.
Frezak (GM): Creep.
Ganelon: Some of them have hilarious names!
Frezak (GM): Creep.
I had one called ALL HAIL THE ABOLETH
While I was setting things up for a Lan game.
Well, a Wan game.
Apheori (GM): They may require passwords. It may be possible to listen in, but you won't know until you try.
Radek: So we need to go to the past, Dave? Why?
I mean, I'd love to, don't mistake my intentions.
But the present seems quite tolerable, for once.
Dave: It's...
I don't know.
But things have already gone wrong, horribly wrong, and as much as it might look nice, the necessary pieces just aren't here and it can't work because it's... it's..
Gaurav: How are the lights around us spaced? Are they concentrated in one area, or are there a couple of lights in every direction?
Apheori (GM): A few solitary ones, an apparent group. Possibly. The tree branches make it hard to tell.
Ganelon: Okay, can I discern what's wrong that Dave is trying to explain to us?
Rhu points towards the apparent group
Bear Soup Guy: Back in a few minutes, I need to make some food and stuff
Rhu: Let's head in that direction. We can use the signals to figure out who -- or what -- we're approaching as we go.
Apheori (GM): Well, to you, everything really does seem fine. The world is stable, magic is normal, Gravy is smelly.
Radek: It doesn't seem like anything important is missing to me.
I'm here, Gravy's here... there's a regrettable over-abundance of nature, perhaps, but it's a stable enough /reality/.
The Gravedigger: As far as we know.
Dave: I know, I know. It's just... it's the wrong time. Things didn't work out, and while they'll still be fine for the time being, they won't be.
Radek: I think I would know by now, thank you very much.
Gaurav: But isn't the purpose of life to enjoy the good times while we can? Discuss.
Dave: Amadi got the others back. When you were, that was much better. It wasn't set. Everything still had yet to happen.
The purpose of life is to make more life.
Apheori (GM): Rhu, Greibel, Amadi: you head toward the lights?
Gaurav: I'm waiting to see what the others do, especially Amadi, as she seems to have some idea about where or why we are.
Amadi makes her radio play some odd 80s music and waits for people to get moving.
Ganelon: That's usually a silly thing to wait for.
Gaurav: I think there's much to be said for hanging around here and see if the others can figure out how to get to us before moving on.
Or, at least, wait for daybreak.
BSG?
Radek: So we need to go to the past to influence this present.
And I'm really not in a mood to argue your second point. Suffice to say that I disagree.
Gaurav: Making more life isn't a purpose, though. It's just what you need to do to go on existing, but it doesn't tell you _why_ going on existing is worthwhile.
Eh, there doesn't seem to be anything going on here anyway.
Rhu heads off towards the lights
Dave: Well, no.
We need to ensure this never becomes the present.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You head off into the woods, toward the lights.
As you go, you hear noises, animal, something tracking you...
The Gravedigger: So......
How?
Gaurav: Aaaaaaat which point I stop and head back to the others.
Ganelon: This might be a stretch, but it *is* the future.
The Gravedigger: Anyone here with timebending powers raise your hand.
The Gravedigger peers about.
Dave: Um.
Amadi follows Rhu until he stops and turns back. Well, actually, she'll totally follow him back, too.
Ganelon: Does Radek know anything about time travel, or semi-credible people who have accomplished it?
I'll roll for that, of course.
Rhu: There's something out there. Something .. tracky.
Amadi: ... Bunnies?
Apheori (GM): He'd probably have heard of folks who've done it/researched it, but it's not something that's really... done.
Bear Soup Guy: Okay, I'm back now
Apheori (GM): It's kind of terribly complicated and tends to just make things worse when not very exactly controlled.
Ganelon: Exact control sounds like something he's great (sometimes) at!
Apheori (GM): Is it the sort of thing he'd have any experience with?
Rhu: BSG: I tried walking towards the cluster of lights, but there is something animal in the woods that tried to track me
Ganelon: Nah.
He likes building robots.
And tools. Maybe a few dips into chemistry to become intimate with explosives.
Gaurav: (to Amadi) It MIGHT be bunnies. We don't know that it ISN'T bunnies.
Rhu: (that was ic sorry)
Amadi: ... Angry hornets?
Rhu: All we know is that thinks it can take me, and that's ... not good.
We could try to sneak to the lights as a group, or we could stay here, set up camp, and set up a proper guard this time.
Radek: I've heard of it being done, and poorly. That's about it.
Greibel: It could be another squirrel...
Amadi: I couldn't be angry hornets. I think.
I don't think I could try to help the others unless they went back to sleep. Maybe not even then. But if they're with Dave... I might know if they get here. Or get not there. Do you think the lights are fireflies?
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20+13 nature the lights to see if they're bioluminescent
(
11
)
+13
=
24
Dave: You, you could try doing what you did before... again?
Frezak (GM): Who is that to?
Apheori (GM): Gravy and Radek.
The Gravedigger: Who, what thing?
Dave: I don't know. Whatever you tried.
That didn't work.
Radek: Well, there was the time you used me as a battering ram and we passed through a solid wall...
Dave: It brought me here when it did.
Didn't?
The Gravedigger growls.
The Gravedigger: If you want us to do something, just fucking tell us what.
Radek: ...The time when I intentionally opened a hole and transported myself out of conventional reality...
Dave: I don't know!
No, not that.
The Gravedigger: Fat lot of bloody help you are, then.
Dave: Not...
Gaurav: Falling asleep?
Dave: What do you ruddy well expect?
The Gravedigger: (to Radek) Time is part of reality.
I'm not a weaver, but I suppose I could /try/ breaking that, though I don't like the prospect.
Dave: I ain't even me, just a piece of a piece of a piece and you're all in the wrong time and you want me to get you out when I can't even get me IN?
AGH!
Dave blasts the tree into kindling.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: The lights are a building.
Ín one direction.
In another, they're mushrooms.
Radek: Well, I'm good at fixing everyone's messes and yours are no exception.
Apheori (GM): In another, they're multiple buildings. In another, a large fire.
Radek: But the issue with time travel is accuracy, and control.
Apheori (GM): The ones Rhu was headed toward was the building. The mushrooms look closer.
Radek: Those who have studied it always find complications in *when* they end up and how much damage is caused in the process.
The Gravedigger: If we just go back far enough it's just an issue of waiting.
Greibel points this all out succinctly to Rhu and Amadi
The Gravedigger: And we're expecting damage anyways.
Radek: Well, let's ask Dave.
The Gravedigger rolls his eyes.
The Gravedigger: Always a great idea.
Radek: Dave, is us returning to the past so important that it justifies the risk involved?
Dave: Time has already been messed up. Going back now is less risk than not.
Radek: Great.
Radek nudges Gravy. "Go ahead and try it."
Frezak (GM): I'd like to use Gravyvision to find the threads of time.
Rhu: Mushrooms?
Apheori (GM): Roll for it.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+20
(
5
)
+20
=
25
Ugh
Not great.
Greibel: The mushrooms do sound safe and maybe useful
Apheori (GM): You find threads of something. They're thin and slightly sticky.
They don't really fit the description of time, and give you a headache.
Frezak (GM): Ehh, fukkit.
I wrap my hand in graves and heave with the inexorable power of rot.
Amadi: Shrooms, man.
Apheori (GM): In graves?
Frezak (GM): Graves.
Apheori (GM): What does that mean?
Frezak (GM): Oh, NOW you want sense?
Make up your mind.
If this world demands sense I'm going to have to spend some hours complaining about soem things.
Apheori (GM): Either the sense needs to make nonsense, or the nonsense needs to make sense.
Roll sanity.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20
(
6
)
=
6
Apheori (GM): Gravy winds up flat on his back covered in sticky kelp-like stuff.
The sky is now green.
The Gravedigger: When are we- oh hells I sound like them now.
Apheori (GM): Radek sees it too.
Rhu: (to Amadi and Greibel) I don't like being out here while that ... thing is roaming around. I say we make for the buildings and see who's home.
Radek: No luck?
You did something to the sky, but ah... it doesn't feel like we're in the past, no.
The Gravedigger: The sky is green and I'm covered in gloop.
Frezak (GM): I will try and removed the gloop.
Greibel: Fair enough. Maybe they know where we are.
Amadi: When.
Radek: Well, I'm not causing a hole again.
Fixing the last one... ugh. Need to work on my methods.
Greibel: When we get there and ask them, obviously!
The Gravedigger: Well I did something that didn't work.
Hooray?
Amadi: No, not that kind of when.
But sure.
Greibel: Then we go to the buildings?
Dave: Keep doing that. Maybe if you tear the universe apart we'll be able to get back.
Gaurav: Which one of us three should go ahead? I have 50 HP after my last level-up, so I'm pretty tough -- maybe I should be ahead?
The Gravedigger: Tearing apart the universe sounds like a bad idea.
Bear Soup Guy: My defense is pretty good but if we run into someone I think you're better at close range
So lead on
Dave: Well, yes. But the whole point is to go back in time, so it will be undone anyway!
I think.
Rhu leads on towards the buildings
Dave: There's only one way to find out!
The Gravedigger looks at Radek.
Greibel follows
Radek buries his head in his hands.
Dave looks completely terrified.
Apheori (GM): Rhu, Greibel: You hear something in the woods (again).
Amadi: You smell bacon.
Radek: I'm not breaking the universe just to go back in time.
Rhu: (crouches, whispers to Greibel) Do you hear that?
Greibel:
rolling 1d20+13 nature to see if I can recognize the sound
(
9
)
+13
=
22
Apheori (GM): Greibel: Sounds like a badger, maybe.
Gaurav: Hmm. Badger, mushroom.
Greibel: Don't worry about it, just something skittering around.
Radek: One pocket dimension... sure, that's no big deal. You can *make* those.
Bear Soup Guy: Oh hahah I just realized
Yeah, we're gonna end up fighting a snake XD
Frezak (GM): Or the Transformers.
Rhu nods, and continues walking towards the house, but trying to be quiet this time.
Rhu:
rolling d20+5 stealth
(
2
)
+5
=
7
Gaurav: hmm
Frezak (GM): SUddenly Rhu is wearing plate armour.
Apheori (GM): Your quiet isn't very quiet. But you come to the house.
Frezak (GM): And carrying all the pots and pans in the world.
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Ganelon: ...Say.
I looked at my journal, and Radek is carrying that silvery stuff that he used to be covered in.
The stuff of time and nonexistence.
Frezak (GM): Okay.
Put it on my shovel.
Apheori (GM): It's a fairly ordinary-looking farmhouse, with a single light on inside. There's a dog on the doorstep.
Frezak (GM): And I'll Chainreach to the past.
And if you hang on.
I'll drag us there.
Grappling-hook-gun style.
Through time.
Gaurav: Gan: ooo!
Ganelon: I was thinking I'd just show it to you. It's only a vial.
Gaurav: What sort of dog?
Apheori (GM): Roll sanity and digging to chainreach to past.
Or that.
Ganelon: But sure, your plan is way more awesoke.
Awesome, even.
Apheori (GM): Dog is... uh... hairy.
>.>
Ganelon: So we'll go with that.
Apheori (GM): And black/
.
Amadi: brb
Ellemerr: Er
brb
Frezak (GM): SAnity!
rolling 1D20
(
10
)
=
10
And... Shovel Attack.
rolling 1D20+9
(
8
)
+9
=
17
Against the AC of TIME
Apheori (GM): Is 30 a reasonable AC for something like time? I'll go with 30.
Which, uh, works because the stuff Radek gave you gives you like +20 or something.
Frezak (GM): Thanks Radek.
And your eldritch timegoop.
Ganelon: Fuck yeah.
This is why I collect all this magical junk.
In the unlikely event that it's exactly what we need in a slump.
Plan B was to use THE BOMB.
Apheori (GM): Right. So you punch a hole in time. Then you get yanked through time. I assume Radek is holding on? Dave clings to Radek.
Ganelon: Yes, he holds on.
I would hope Gravy holds onto him.
Because I would not put much faith in the grip of an emaciated old grump.
Frezak (GM): Yeah.
Radek is hugged by Gravy.
A big meaty grip.
Apheori (GM): You find yourselves in a Hole.
Ellemerr: back
Ganelon: I don't remember if I know what it's like to be *in* one. In fact, I think I've tried very hard to never end up inside one, personally.
Frezak (GM): You sent in a roboid once.
That's about it.
Apheori (GM): You sent a bot once. In person, though, the inside is actually a lot less screwy than the outside.
Ganelon: Yes, but it's hard to question one's robot servitors after the fact.
Apheori (GM): It's just black and feels weird and is a bit like Midnight.
Radek: This isn't... as bad as I thought.
Apheori (GM): You can sense other openings around you, sort of, even though there's no real space or distance here.
Gravy could also punch open a new one from this side, but it probably wouldn't be a good idea. But he is holding a shovel. With punchy power.
Ganelon: Well...
I do have some experience with closing openings from the inside.
Frezak (GM): Can you recharge the daily action?
Isn't that an artificer thing?
Ganelon: I totes can.
Frezak (GM): Fuck yeah.
Gaurav: What if you leave the bomb behind on a timed fuse? Would you blow out the Hole?
Ganelon: Let me find the actual wording.
Frezak (GM): I want to GravyScent for... THE SMELL OF DRUGS
Ganelon: Oh. Huh.
You got 7 THP for using that daily item power.
Frezak (GM): Wow.
Ganelon: That's a class feature I didn't even know existed.
Frezak (GM): Nice.
Ganelon: So yes, during a short rest I can recharge your item's daily use for the day.
Frezak (GM): Oh, short rest.
Ganelon: I can do this to one thing per milestone, or give it that emergency attack bonus.
Frezak (GM): Let's take 5 in the HOle!
Ganelon: Well, we're in a hole. We probably have 5 minutes, yeah?
Apheori (GM): Technically you don't have any time at all.
You could take an eternity.
Frezak (GM): Awesome.
Ganelon: Chainshovel reloaded.
Frezak (GM): So, I scent for drugs.
Very familiar drugs.
Almost;.. oaty.
Apheori (GM): Dave is still clinging to Radek like a limpet or something.
Ganelon: ...Clever.
Apheori (GM): Oaty?
Frezak (GM): Oaty.
Apheori (GM): Roll for smell.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+20
(
3
)
+20
=
23
I'm so great at rolls.
I'm glad I have +20.
really glad.
Ganelon: Yeah...
Frezak (GM): Really, really glad.
Ganelon: Amadi might know that we got out, at least.
If we continue this trend of bumbling.
(From Ellemerr): Do I?
Gaurav: Does the dog look friendly at all?
(To Amadi): Uh... I'm not sure they got 'out', exactly. More like... into something else. And if they're not careful, the something else will devour them, bones and all.
(From Ellemerr): Delightful.
(To Amadi): But sure, you know. You can also feel Dave like a horrible itch in the back of your head, and she's screaming.
Apheori (GM): Gravy: You smell... actually, you smell a lot of things. There's a bit too much of it, in fact. Lots of holes, lots of remembered smells. You don't know which are which.
You smell a dead Greibel.
Ganelon: Oh my.
Apheori (GM): Gaurav: The dog looks tired, but gets up and guards the door at your approach. It isn't particularly large, but very furry.
Ganelon: We might have to bury him.
Amadi rubs the back of her head, wincing.
Greibel: I'm really getting my reps in today
Frezak (GM): I'll start heading for the greibely smell.
Greibel:
rolling 1d20+13 nature to make sure the dog doesn't hate us
(
13
)
+13
=
26
Amadi is muttering something very quickly under her breath.
Frezak (GM): Git it a spacebiscuit
Rhu: (to Amadi) You okay?
Apheori (GM): Dog doesn't hate you; just guarding its pack.
Well, family.
People.
Amadi: Dawn... loud.
Amadi keeps muttering.
Rhu: Loud?
(From Amadi): Okay so I know I said I'd be fine without you but I might have been wrong and it would be nice if you came back now and I'd like to help but you're sort of screwing with my concentration and I'm not sure where you are and that doesn't help and maybe you can't even hear me because I don't know where I'm supposed to speak and besides you are being so very loud but please don't be eaten, okay?
Amadi nods, screwing her eyes shut.
Gaurav: Does it make sense to just walk up the dog and hope for the best, or would it be better to get Greibel to befriend it?
Rhu nods at Amadi, and mutters a quick prayer to help her.
Rhu:
rolling d20+9 religion check
(
13
)
+9
=
22
Greibel: I think it'll be okay if we knock on the door.
Gaurav: Okay.
Rhu walks up to the dog
Dave suddenly screams, "DON'T BE EATEN!" and tries to pull Gravy and Radek though a hole. (Given that they're both a fair bit bigger than her, this won't actually work unless they help.)
(To Ellemerr): The screaming gets quieter to the point where you can mostly ignore it.
Radek: Er...
Eaten?
Apheori (GM): The dog barks at Rhu.
Dave tugs some more.
Dave: Eaten!
Frezak (GM): Do we want to be tugged?
Dave: Eaten eaten eaten eaten bad things eaten blow it up!
Frezak (GM): IC?
Amadi mutters, loud enough to be heard, "Come on, come on, come on! You can do it!"
Greibel: I think he can too. You just have to get over this weird fear of animals, Rhu.
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Greibel: They can smell fear, you know.
Radek: Blow what up?
Frezak (GM): Radek is suddenly excited.
Dave: EATEN!
Frezak (GM): Do we see/sense any eating thingies?
Apheori (GM): Not really, no.
Ganelon: I usually trust Dave when he's legitimately worried about something, but...
Rhu: (mutter) ... I wasn't frightened until it started barking at me ... (shouts at the house) HELLO! ANYBODY THERE?
Ganelon: Well, okay.
What's she trying to drag us towards?
Like, what can I discern about the exit whence she is dragging?
Apheori (GM): It's unclear.
Ganelon: Harrumpg.
Apheori (GM): It doesn't really seem to be toward anything.
Ganelon: HARRUMPH EVEN
Frezak (GM): Harrumpg!
Ganelon: Eh, fine. We got this far because she insisted it was important, we might as well keep playing along.
Frezak (GM): fiiine
Gravy will use his studing skills and grump like Radek
Ganelon: You're learning from a master.
Radek has Skill Focus (grumping).
And a racial bonus.
Frezak (GM): Man.
You dirty minmaxer.
Ganelon: It gets better.
Soon I'll have a utility power like Glib Tongue.
I'll be rolling +20 to grump once every five minutes.
Frezak (GM): I use Ruinous Phrase on your character sheet.
Ganelon: Sorry, 23.
I grump as an immediate reaction.
Anyways, we grudgingly follow Dave.
Apheori (GM): Dave pulls you through a hole onto a pile of rotting corpses.
Frezak (GM): Goody
JACKPOT
Radek: ...Dave, I hate you.
Frezak (GM): I KNOW THIS, RADEK
THIS I CAN DO
Gravy immediately looks for suitable digging land.
Apheori (GM): You're in a bedroom or something. It's dark out. You hear someone shouting something outside, and then Dave screams and jumps out the window.
You see lots of good ground outside.
You also see Greibel and Amadi.
Frezak (GM): I loot the bodies.
And the room.
I probably can't loot Radek.
Apheori (GM): The bodies were some farmers or something. You find some cheap jewelry, some coins, some herbs, some tools. Nothing magical.
Frezak (GM): HERBS?
I take the herbs.
And leap out the window.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You see Dave fly out the window. She winds up in a tree.
Frezak (GM): Going
The Gravedigger: GRAAAAAAAAAAVES
Apheori (GM): Then Gravy jumps about a bit after.
XD
Rhu gives the dog a "did you see that?!" look
Apheori (GM): The dog runs after Gravy/
.
Radek pokes his head out the window.
Rhu: Radek!
Ganelon: He looks like... hold on.
http://i.imgur.com/zYWU28q.png
Like this.
Amadi runs over and hugs Dave. "You're not eaten!"
Gaurav: Gan: bwahahahaha
Frezak (GM): Anyone played Prototype?
Apheori (GM): Amadi: Dave is hugging the tree.
Frezak (GM): Because I imagine Gravy just making this shockwave as he lands.
Ellemerr: Right. Of course. I guess I'm too tiny to actually reach her.
Can I hug anyone else? :3
Frezak (GM): How high was the window?
Because I will take that fall damage.
Ganelon: I played Prototype.
Apheori (GM): Second floor. Shouldn't hurt you.
Frezak (GM): Yeah, when you leap off really big buildings.
Apheori (GM): Ellemerr: You can try to hug Gravy.
Frezak (GM): That sort of badass landing.
Radek: Where in the hells are we now?
Is this the past?
Rhu: The ... past?
The Gravedigger: It will be.
Rhu squints
Gaurav: Where's the dog? And Greibel?
Bear Soup Guy: Greibel's just sort of watching oddly
Radek: Oh, /very/ funny, Gravy.
Apheori (GM): Dog is barking at Gravy, but in a fairly friendly manner.
Bear Soup Guy: Everything caught him off guard
Radek grumbles and withdraws from the window.
Ganelon: I'll work on just getting outside like a normal person.
Apheori (GM): There are some stairs down. They lead into a kitchen area, with a lit candle on the table. It looks like magic.
The door out is on the other side of that.
Ellemerr: I'll hug Gravy. And be vocally happy that he isn't eaten.
Ganelon: Magic candle?
Score. I'll take it and head outside.
Apheori (GM): Aye.
Rhu takes the opportunity of the dog's distraction to slip into the farmhouse through the closest door.
Ganelon: No magic is useless when you have the power to reduce it to dusssssst
Apheori (GM): It stays lit and doesn't output any heat, just light.
The Gravedigger: Hey, sandwich kid.
Apheori (GM): Radek: On the way out, you almost run into Rhu.
Frezak (GM): brb
Amadi: I'm sorry I will leave you, except it probably hopefully won't happen now. It's not supposed to.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+14 perception check for whatever room I'm in -- I guess the kitchen Radek just came out of?
(
17
)
+14
=
31
Apheori (GM): Yeah, it's a kitchen.
There's broken furniture and stuff and blood on the walls and a horrible smell. Looks like a struggle happened here.
Frezak (GM): CSI TIME
Ganelon: Do we have a blood spatter analyst in the party?
Frezak (GM): No.
YOU HAVE MY OLFACTORY SENSES
Gaurav: I check the drawers. Any names, dates, addresses? Delivery menus in the drawers?
We also literally have fragments of a god.
Ganelon: Eh, those aren't nearly as useful as you might think when it comes to mundane crime-solving.
Blood just comes out of their hair and interferes with your crime scene.
Ellemerr: Have you ever tried using them for that?
Frezak (GM): Blood is always coming out my hair, that's true.
Ganelon: Maybe I have!
Gaurav: Rhu probably has clotted blood on his head from the squirrel attack.
Frezak (GM): I thought we rested that away.
Apheori (GM): Uh... no.
Gaurav: Right, but I never cleaned it away. Unless the squirrel came back and licked it clean.
Apheori (GM): Nothing interesting in the drawers.
Just some utensils and crap.
Frezak (GM): I thrust the herbs at Greibel.
The Gravedigger: herbs!
Greibel takes the herbs
Greibel: These will be...useful
Ganelon: Is he just saying that to be nice?
Bear Soup Guy: Not sure, depends on what kind of herbs they are
Rhu searches the rest of the house, from bottom to top: basement, ground floor, ending at the room with the dead bodies in it.
Ganelon: "That's... that's poison ivy, Gravy."
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Gaurav: Gan: ha!
Apheori (GM): BSG: Herbs used in rituals around the dead.
Frezak (GM): I'm pretty sure Greibel will smoke anything.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: It's stinky and gross and apparently someone or something broke in and killed everyone throughout the house and then piled the bodies in the main bedroom.
Rhu goes back downstairs and explains this to everybody
The Gravedigger: Shameful!
The Gravedigger begins to dig graves.
Gaurav:
rolling 1d20+12 heal check on the bodies to see how they were killed, and whether there are any clues as to what killed them
(
12
)
+12
=
24
Are they humans or elves?
Frezak (GM): Wyverns!
Ganelon: Radek will have a seat (there's chairs, I hope) and for the first time since he got it, try to puzzle out the missing piece to this hole-fixing formula.
The Lost (direct link) Library, one might call it.
Ellemerr: I hate doing this but I really should sleep. >.<
Apheori (GM): Humans, killed with knives, and I should go too.
So... uh... graves later.
Bear Soup Guy: yay sleep, yay graves
Frezak (GM): GRAVES ALWAYS
Gaurav: the eternal sleep
warm soily sleep
Ellemerr: Er... right. Well, sweet nightmares, then.
Gaurav: Sleep well!
Bear Soup Guy: adios
bye everyone! I'm going to take a nap!
Gaurav: take care, BSG!
Ganelon: Goodnight, fellows.

Session 28

Apheori (GM): Okay, so y'all are outside a farmhouse. Except for Rhu, he's inside. And Dave is probably in a tree, but you can't actually see her anymore. And Amadi isn't accounted for either. What else?
I suppose I should put a door on the house.
Frezak (GM): We're rested, yes?
Apheori (GM): I have no idea.
Are you?
I think you are.
Unless you aren't.
Gaurav: I think that depends on whether the sleep we took to get to this place was restive or not.
Where are the farming fields?
Frezak (GM): Hidden.
By Bong haze.
Apheori (GM): They don't seem to have any fields.
Unless they're behind the trees.
Or the trees could be what they're farming.
Frezak (GM): YOU were the field all along!
They farm FLESH
Fleeeeeesh
Gaurav: Hee
Apheori (GM): Or it could be livestock.
In the trees.
Eaten by zombies.
Frezak (GM): Pigeon farmers?
ZOMBIES?
Gaurav: We go outside to find goats perched daintily in the branches
Apheori (GM): I don't know. I'm just making this up. You guys may find more if you look.
Bear Soup Guy: I'd grow a goat tree
Gaurav: and the occasional cow
Frezak (GM): HawkMoose.
Gaurav: Ew yes
So were there any dead bodies in the kitchen? I know Rhu was standing next to the dead bodies when we ended last time. Does that mean he's upstairs in the bedroom?
Frezak (GM): I thought I was burying bodies.
Apheori (GM): The bodies are upstairs in the main bedroom. I think you were digging the graves at this point; the bodies themselves have yet to be moved.
Frezak (GM): I'll dig an extra grave in case we need one.
Gaurav: Okay, then, Rhu is upstairs, standing over the bodies wishing he had a pipe and a deerstalker hat.
Apheori (GM): Radek was apparently sitting in the kitchen (chairs are useful things).
Ganelon: Oh, he was? That does sound more like a thing I would have done.
Apheori (GM): When did Rhu get attacked by a squirrel? o_O
Bear Soup Guy: Last time
Ganelon: Recently?
Because I feel like that probably happens often.
Bear Soup Guy: Greibel made fun of him and his hair was bleeding
Apheori (GM): XD
Okay.
Anyone want to bring the bodies down? They kind of smell.
Rhu: Did you find anything examining them, or did you actually examine them yet?
I guess you did a heal check.
Gaurav: I did a heal check, rolled 24 (12+12)
Apheori (GM): Okay, so they were humans, there were... uh... maybe three of them, except the parts don't quite add up quite right, but the volume looks about right for three, and they were stabbed a lot with probably knives and sawed a bit. And they smell bad.
Also they look like they'd only have been there for a day or two, tops.
Gaurav: "Apheori (GM): Rhu: It's stinky and gross and apparently someone or something broke in and killed everyone throughout the house and then piled the bodies in the main bedroom."
Apheori (GM): Right.
Frezak (GM): I could go up to the top floor and toss the bodies into the graves through hte window.
Ganelon: Sounds respectful.
Gaurav: "parts don't add up" -> eight hands, four feet?
Apheori (GM): Classy.
Frezak (GM): I don't give a flying fuck about the DEAD.
I care about the GRAVES.
Apheori (GM): Well, there are something like five right hands, two left hands, three feet, one head...
How dirty are you willing to get?
Would you like to rummage through the pile and find out what all is in it?
So far I think you've only rummaged through the top.
Rhu is disappointed at not being able to examine the blood splatter patterns in more detail or whatever, but only a crazy person would get between Gravy and his grave-filling duties.
Frezak (GM): If only you have some way to... dig through the pile....
Hey, I haven't touched the bodies yet.
i'm digging.
Ganelon: I, at least, have absolutely no intention of digging through piles of corpse bits without at least a reasonable prospect of reward.
Apheori (GM): Does Radek have a sense of smell?
Ganelon: Well if he's anything like me, he can shut his off.
Apheori (GM): I know Rhu does. Rhu! Roll something to not be overpowered.
Gaurav: gah
Rhu:
rolling d20
(
5
)
=
5
Ganelon: (It takes a little conscious effort to not smell)
Gaurav: It's a pretty normal sense of smell, and I think he'd be avoiding the pile, but if you insist ...
What time of day is it? I think it was night when we set off towards this farmhouse -- is it still dark out?
Apheori (GM): Radek's fine, then. Rhu is... ill.
It's getting lighter.
Almost dawn.
Rhu looks around for a bathroom
Apheori (GM): Still some weird noises from the woods, but Gravy's digging is probably more than enough to scare it off...
Gaurav: s/bathroom/restroom/g
Apheori (GM): Rhu: No bathroom. Just bedrooms with lots of things stacked on top of each other. A metal tub in a closet.
Gaurav: Dude
Rhu pukes in the metal tub
Apheori (GM): Greibel: What are you doing?
Bear Soup Guy: Kind of sitting outside wondering what all the fuss is about
Watching Dave maybe
Gaurav: Dude. Creepy farmhouse in the morning light. This is definitely my favourite location we've found so far this campaign.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You see Dave pull Amadi up into the tree.
You can roll perception to not lose sight of them in the leaves.
Frezak (GM): Bitches are having a fucking tea party!
Gaurav: It's all they ever do.
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20+11
(
3
)
+11
=
14
Apheori (GM): Dude, they probably are. XD
Greibel: You can't tell if they're having a tea party or not. There's not really any motion aside from some random leaf rustling.
Bear Soup Guy: I'll follow them up into the tree
Apheori (GM): Roll tree climbing.
Also move your guy over there if you do.
Bear Soup Guy: Should that be a stat or just a d20?
Apheori (GM): Use whatever makes the most sense. I don't even remember what the skills that exist are. >.<
Gaurav: Acrobatics or athletics, I guess.
Ganelon: Athletics is normally used to climb, and that's a strength skill.
I would consider you trained.
Bear Soup Guy: Right
Gaurav: Maybe you can speak to the tree and ask it to bend over?
Apheori (GM): Also, Radek, Rhu comes running down and pukes in a tub nearby. Do you react?
Bear Soup Guy: Watch my skillful athletics roll
Ganelon: Because honestly, you could turn into a monkey.
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20+-0
(
20
)
+-0
=
20
Gaurav gasps
Apheori (GM): Greibel climbs into the tree and disappears as well.
Frezak (GM): Greibel becomes the tree.
Bear Soup Guy: Greibel climbs all the way to the sky
(To Greibel): They ARE having a tea party!
Radek: Having fun, Rhu?
Frezak (GM): Greibel pulls out this sack of beans....
(To Greibel): Dave invites you to join them. Amadi looks really grumpy, and keeps throwing grumpy looks at Dave.
Rhu looks up and gives Radek half a dirty look before having to puke to some more.
Greibel: I'd like to join your tea party
I know a lot about tea. It's what I drink when I'm out of drugs.
Dave passes Greibel a cup of something that is almost, but not entirely, unlike tea.
Ganelon: Perish the thought!
Dave: This IS drugs!
Frezak (GM): Greibel wouldn't be Greibel if he did not have endless drugs.
Greibel: Best of both worlds!
Greibel kindly takes the cup and has a few cautious sips
Frezak (GM): THe cup screams.
Apheori (GM): Gravy: You hear some strange whistling coming out of the tree.
Also it sounds like someone hitting someone.
Frezak (GM): Is it interfering with my grave-digging ability?
(To Greibel): Nobody hit anyone. It just sounded like that when Amadi made herself comfortable. Or something.
Apheori (GM): Nope.
Frezak (GM): Then fuck the tree.
I'm doing something important.
Rhu heads outside into the morning gloam, drinks some water from his canteen and rinsing his mouth out
Apheori (GM): Greibel: The tea gives you a nice relaxing high, and also kills your sense of smell. Completely.
Greibel 's face twitches
Greibel: My nose is blind!
Greibel chuckles
Gaurav: I think we have a volunteer for digging through the organ pile!
Frezak (GM): DIGGING, YOU SAY?
Apheori (GM): Nobody can hear Greibel say that.
Greibel: Dave and Amadi chat. You can join in or not. I don't have anything for them to chat about, so they're just chatting.
Nobody else can hear them chatting, either.
Bear Soup Guy: I'll listen and observe quietly
Gaurav: While Rhu's outside, he's going to look around for any blood stains or signs of fighting outside the farmhouse.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+14 perception check
(
5
)
+14
=
19
Ganelon: This seems like a good time to unravel the mysteries of the universe, so that's probably what Radek is concerning himself with.
The mysteries at a much larger scale than, you know, this murder mystery.
Apheori (GM): Of course.
Ganelon: If he were dealing with this, he'd be antagonizing Rhu some more.
Apheori (GM): Radek unravels, and ignores the candle he found.
Ganelon: I had actually forgotten, but it's true. He would do that.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: There's not a whole lot outside. It looks like none of the struggle ever made it outside.
Despite all the mes inside.
mess
Gaurav: In looking outside the farmhouse, Rhu walks all the way around it, glancing up at the tea-party tree as he does. He then goes back upstairs and then looks gloomily at the body-pile.
Apheori (GM): Perception on the tree.
Gaurav:
rolling 1d20+14 perception on the tree
(
4
)
+14
=
18
Apheori (GM): Behind the farmhouse there's a path leading to the woods. There's also an area where it looks like there should be livestock, but it's all been cut/opened and it's empty.
Gaurav: Look how cunningly I'm saving up all rolls > 5 for later in the game.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: you can't make out anything interesting in the tree, other than that there's apparently something up there because it's rustling a bit.
You also can't hear any chatter.
Ganelon: Indeed, but you don't know when you'll exhaust your supply of sub-5 rolls.
Rhu: (shouts up at the tree) Hey, you okay up there?
Gaurav: (he saw Dave fly out the window into it, so he knows she's up there, but I don't suppose he knows that Greibel and Amadi are as well)
Frezak (GM): Awright, I'm probably done with the graves.
I'll go check with the guys that they're done with the bodybits.
Ganelon: The guy outside or the guy inside?
Frezak (GM): Welll...
Rhu.
Since I'll see him first.
Ganelon: Certainly not because he's liable to be less grumpy.
Frezak (GM): And he might actually want the bodies.
Since he's a cultist.
Gaurav: I guess Rhu gives up on the tree responding eventually.
The Gravedigger: You need the body bits for anything?
And what's with the tree?
Rhu: Dave's in it. And no, although I don't think we should bury them just yet. The police might need them ... if they've discovered policemen here yet.
The Gravedigger: Awww
But I dug the graves and everything!
Frezak (GM): He tromps back to the graves and leaves business cards.
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Gaurav: "Today you were buried by GRAVY"
Ganelon: Just leave a note.
"Dear cops, please use the graves provided once your investigation is complete. P.S. We didn't do it.
- Gravy"
Frezak (GM): YES
Gaurav: Hee
There weren't any phones or anything in the house, so I don't know how we're going to call the police though. Maybe nobody will mind if we bury 'em.
Frezak (GM): I could bury them and leave inventory lists next to each grave.
Rhu: Which grave gets the head? There's only one head.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D3
(
2
)
=
2
Middle grave.
Ganelon: Excellent selection process.
Frezak (GM): Gravy flips his three-sided coin.
Apheori (GM): Are you digging through the pile yet?
Frezak (GM): I was just going to scoop the bits and carry them out.
With my shovel.
No, my spade.
Better shape.
Rhu trails behind Frezak, muttering something about evidence and having a bad feeling about this house, but not doing anything to stop him.
The Gravedigger: Wooo-eeeee these are RIPE.
Apheori (GM): Gravy: Roll a thingy to handle the smell.
Frezak (GM): Do they smell like ordinary rotting corpses?
Apheori (GM): Roll a thingy on that too.
Radek: You two don't need an epitaph, right?
Frezak (GM): constitution!
rolling 1D20+6
(
17
)
+6
=
23
Rhu follows Gravy in
The Gravedigger: Not really.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+3 constitution check against smelly corpses
(
17
)
+3
=
20
The Gravedigger: Other than 'bits of people here)
Rhu: If they smell that bad, they're probably fresh. Whatever did this might still be in the neighbourhood.
Frezak (GM): I tihnk it must have been a 'who'.
Apheori (GM): Yeah, Gravy is fine.
Frezak (GM): Animals don't make piles of bodybits.
Apheori (GM): Rhu's better now too.
Ganelon: Should I do a roll for determining the actual results of my puzzling?
Lately it's all been about the hole-closing executable.
And what's missing that results in dreadful headaches.
Apheori (GM): Sure.
Ganelon: Arcana, or just Intelligence?
Gaurav: Any way we can investigate the Hunger thing that chased us out of Midnight?
Apheori (GM): Arcana.
Ganelon: Investigate it?
Apheori (GM): So Gravy's shovelling corpse bits?
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+12 Arcana
(
11
)
+12
=
23
I would probably start by asking a god.
Given how Midnight was evidently their turf.
Frezak (GM): Yep.
Rhu mutters a silent prayer over the body parts pile
Ganelon: Consign them to a frustrating and futile end, Rhu.
(It's a wonder they even let followers of Hazz say prayers for other people)
("They" in this context, I suppose, meaning the rest of us.)
Gaurav: The same end waits for us all, rich or poor, strong or weak.
I pray only that they may find it swiftly.
And don't come back as zombies so we have to kill them again or anything.
Maybe they were zombies? Breaking them into piles might stop respawnage.
Apheori (GM): Do you shovel the parts out the window, or what?
Also: Updated count: five heads, two torsos, one ribcage, five feet, nine hands.
And a couple of thighs.
Ganelon: I would suspect gnolls, but the building isn't on fire.
Frezak (GM): Sure, i'll scoop them out the window.
Gaurav: That is gross and disgusting and awesome. I love this farmhouse so much.
Apheori (GM): Would gnolls make a single nice pile in the upstairs bedroom when they're done?
Ganelon: Well, they usually don't leave even skeletons behind 'cause they eat the meat and bones off their victims, but it's not like a small number couldn't get too full to finish.
Stacking the leftovers into a pile is strange behaviour, though, I'll give you that.
Gaurav: Maybe they've gone to fetch a cart?
Rhu wanders outside again and looks for that path in the woods
Ganelon: Oh, right. I still need to know what that 23 on Arcana led to.
Apheori (GM): So Gravy shovels everything out the window, Rhu wanders behind the place, Radek makes some vague connections that he might be able to work with later, and Greibel is up a tree.
And that's when the guards show up.
Gaurav: o.0
Which direction do they come from?
Apheori (GM): Over... uh...
I'll try to find some icons.
Frezak (GM): TADAAAAA
1 guard captain and 3 guardlings
Gaurav: Pfft guardlings
I'm imagining pseudo dragons with little badges stapled to their ears
Ganelon: Uh oh. We now have two groups of guards.
Apheori (GM): Dammit, Gravy.
Um, Frezak.
I mean.
Okay, yours are better.
Gaurav: oof, what noses
Rhu can't see them from where he is, so he'll just continue examining the path
Apheori (GM): They don't even notice the tree and go right past it.
They do, however, notice the body parts flying out the window.
Gaurav:
rolling 1d20+14 perception check on the path
(
16
)
+14
=
30
Ganelon: These guards better watch out.
Apheori (GM): It's a well-travelled path, probably leading to something important to the farmhouse. There's a broken cart by it.
Guards approach with guns drawn.
Frezak (GM): Pfffft, guns.
Ganelon: This building's entrance is protected by an old man with a rifle in a chair.
Apheori (GM): Is the door open?
Ganelon: The ultimate form of security.
Frezak (GM): Musing about metaphysics.
Ganelon: (He's not actually got the rifle drawn)
Apheori (GM): Actually, there's probably a back door too, which Rhu would have gone out...
Frezak (GM): Presumably I don't see them because I'm busy shovelling.
Ganelon: Well, are you taking any considerations with regards to your aim?
Frezak (GM): I'm aiming for the graves.
Ganelon: Then you probably have to look at them, unless you're performing trick-shots.
And if you're shooting blind, odds are you're going to hit one of these guys as they approach below.
Apheori (GM): Yeah, you'll see them.
Frezak (GM): I'll wave.
Apheori (GM): Frezak: can you attach those icons to characters so they can speak?
I don't know how.
Ganelon: You mean put images on 'em so they show up with those images in the chatbox?
Apheori (GM): Yeah.
The images that are in the... space.
Board.
Thingy.
Guard Captain: I AM A GUARD
Frezak (GM): Like that?
Ganelon: Dead simple, if so. You go to the character in the journal and it should have an empty space for images.
Apheori (GM): Righht, but is there any way to get the image off the board and into the space?
Ganelon: Oh. Not that I know of.
Apheori (GM): Frezak: could you make one for the generic guards too?
Frezak (GM): Do they need it?
Apheori (GM): Just one.
IT may or may not be needed, but it could be useful. Depends on what happens.
Frezak (GM): Done.
Though we know who they are, they don't need avatars.
Apheori (GM): Good point.
Well, anyway, thank you.
So the guard captain yells at you.
And points his rifle at you.
Guard Captain: Stop!
Apheori (GM): He's creative.
The Gravedigger: Two more shovelsfull and I'll be right down.
Guard Captain: He gestures to the other guards and two of them move toward the back of the house.
Apheori (GM): Put your shovel down and come out!
Frezak (GM): *gasp*
THE GRUMP
Apheori (GM): Ghah!
I got that backwards.
Guard Captain: Put your shovel down and come out!
The Gravedigger: Fiiiiiine
Frezak (GM): I'll clomp down the stairs, shovel on my shoulder.
Radek: What's the commotion about?
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+14 perception check to hear the guards coming
(
4
)
+14
=
18
The Gravedigger: Some shouty guy outside.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You notice them, then they notice you and point weapons at you.
Guard: (to Rhu) Don't move!
Radek gives Gravy a *very* sarcastic "Oh no, really?" look.
The Gravedigger: I swear.
Rhu: (to Guard) ... err, hi?
Apheori (GM): Is Rhu holding anything?
Ganelon: I'm sorry, Frezak, but "some shouty guy outside" is possibly the most redundant answer you could give.
To someone aware of the commotion.
Frezak (GM): Yes.
I know.
Gaurav: He'll be holding his maul, just cause there isn't anywhere convenient to put it.
Ganelon: "Oh, no, the bodies weren't SMASHED..."
Guard: (to Rhu) Put the weapon down.
Ganelon: "I just carry this for self-defense."
Apheori (GM): The other guard with the caption goes to examine the parts Gravy shoveled out the window.
Rhu puts down the maul
Rhu ... well, leans it against the house.
Ganelon: If this turns into a fight, I'm going to challenge myself not to stand up from this chair throughout the whole thing.
Frezak (GM): You need a pipe.
Ganelon: I will use nothing but my robot minions, who incidentally now have names.
Apheori (GM): Greibel has a pipe.
Gaurav: Gan: that would be awesome. Do you still have your safari hat from the sphinx fight?
Ganelon: Did it just appear on my head?
Because if so, I think I might need to play the part again for it to reappear. I've kinda been through a lot since then.
Apheori (GM): Is the front door open? Can the guards see inside?
Rhu: (to Guards, with hands raised) Hi. This might be a silly question, but what planet is this?
Apheori (GM): Also, I'll be right back.
Ganelon: I made no effort to close any doors.
Guard: (to Rhu) This is Cerris. What are you doing here?
Guard Captain: (pointing a rifle at Gravy) Put the shovel down and step outside!
The Gravedigger: This, sir, is a spade.
Guard: Um, Captain, this isn't right.
Guard Captain: Put it down!
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+4 history check to see if I know anything about "Cerris"
(
20
)
+4
=
24
(to Guard) We don't really know. We sort of just appeared. You'd have to ask the godlings.
The Gravedigger: Look, I don't know who you are, and you turn up, point a gun at me and tell me to drop my work-tools? For all I know you killed these people and decided to clean up after yourselves.
Like hell I'm disarming in front of a angry violent stranger.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: Cerris isn't a planet you know. You're very certain of this. It also might not be a planet, though - there is a city named that, for instance...
Gaurav: Would Rhu know anything about that city?
Guard: (to Rhu) When? Did you not do this?
Apheori (GM): Let's say it involved a lot of kelp.
Guard Captain: We've been tracking this case for the past four months, and now, the closest we've come to getting ahead of it, we find you at the scene, shovelling parts. How do you think that looks?
Rhu: Do ... what? We just got here.
Radek grumbles.
Radek: It looks bloody inconvenient. Keep it down over there.
Ganelon: For dramatic effect I'm going to say he's seated facing away from the door.
The Gravedigger: I'm burying abunch of dismembered dead people I found and a guy turns up pointing a gun at me.
If you're a guard, then you could start be telling people that.
Ganelon: Perhaps one hand is visible, like Dr. Claw.
Frezak (GM): You need a hat tilted down.
Ganelon: Well, I still don't know if that safari hat was real or imagined.
Guard: (to Rhu) We're investigating a series of murders. If you had nothing to do with it, you should come with us. Tell us what you do know.
Guard Captain: Um...
Rhu: (to Guard) Happy to help. And if you could help .. me find our way to the closest city, I'd really appreciate that.
Guard Captain: What else would I be?
The Gravedigger: What do YOU call a stranger pointing a gun at you?
Guard Captain: If you're intending to bury the bodies, why are you throwing pieces out the window?
Radek: How about noisy?
The Gravedigger: Because the graves are down there.
Guard Captain: Argh.
So you're saying you didn't do this.
The Gravedigger: Gods no.
We just found bits.
Guard Captain: You just happen to show up immediately after and decide to clean up something that has nothing to do with you?
The Gravedigger: Immediately?
Can't you smell 'em?
They are ripe.
Any longer and they would be all mooshy.
Greibel climbs down from the tree obliviously
Greibel: You guys are interrupting tea time!
Guard Captain: What?
Guard: He's right, captain. It's too old.
Frezak (GM): "don't min him, he's on drugs"
Guard Captain: But the... it should have happened yesterday.
The Gravedigger: Go smell 'em.
Guard points a gun at Greibel.
The Gravedigger: Seriously, stop it with the gods-damned guns.
Greibel: Woah, hey now
Apheori (GM): The guards in back escort Rhu toward the front.
Unless he resists.
Does he?
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+5 stealth check to look for an opportunity to run into the trees when the guard's guard is down, but he's not going to take it unless he's sure (or rolls a 1, I guess)
(
18
)
+5
=
23
Apheori (GM): Well, he has an opportunity. I dunno if it's good or not.
Ganelon: I won't try to stop you, but uh... what are you doing?
Rhu: (to Guards) Did you guys see the cart? There's a broken cart in that path over there. It might be a clue.
Gaurav: I don't trust these guys, and they have guns, which is a bad sign. If they turn out to be the killers, I'd rather be free so I can attack them unexpectedly. Or something.
Guard: It looks like a cart.
Guard Captain: Okay, yes, we're guards. Could everyone just come outside so we can discuss this?
Or... down.
Guard Captain eyes Greibel.
Guard Captain: How many of you are there?
Ganelon: I'd like to do an Insight on him before I cooperate, just to see if I think he's lying about being a guard.
I doubt it, but why not be safe?
Bear Soup Guy: ooo, good idea
Ganelon: ...Oh. That's why.
My Insight is atrocious.
rolling 1d20+4
(
14
)
+4
=
18
Well, whatever!
Apheori (GM): You get the feeling he may have left something out.
Gaurav: Does the guard going to check out the cart separate the two, or do they stick close to each other?
Apheori (GM): They don't even go to it.
One just makes a stupid comment.
That's basically it.
Ganelon: Alright then.
Gaurav: Sigh. So much for my cunning plan. I'll go quietly along with them, but keep an eye out for any opportunity to distract them.
Ganelon: Radek will stand up crankily. *Very* crankily.
I'm tempted to call it an intimidate attempt.
Gaurav: Do it!
Apheori (GM): The guards lead Rhu around to the front of the house.
On the way, Dave falls out of the tree and lands on one of them.
One of them probably picked up your mace, so it might as well have been that one.
They kind of freak out, and try to grab her, and one of them shoots the tree on accident.
Gaurav: Poor tree.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+2 Being frighteningly cranky.
(
10
)
+2
=
12
Frezak (GM): I'll assist!
rolling 1D20+6
(
5
)
+6
=
11
Rhu shoots Greibel a "I think we can take these guys" look
Frezak (GM): Gan gets a +2.
Ganelon: With any luck they'll be like "Oh shit, we really shouldn't annoy the old guy."
Greibel shoots Rhu a "what are you, crazy?" look
Apheori (GM): Dave is yelling something, but you can't actually hear anything. The guard manages to pin her arms or something, restraining her.
Rhu sighs
Apheori (GM): The Guard with line of sight on the old guy takes a step back, trips over a body part, and falls on some more body parts with a horrible squelching sound and an even worse smell.
Rhu: (to Guard) She's with us. She's ... troubled.
Ganelon: Yessss
Dave shouts something.
Dave: (silently)
Rhu taks a step back from the corner
Greibel: I don't think it's wise for you guards to be messing around with Dave...
Guard Captain: Hey!
Apheori (GM): Someone do something. You've thrown the guards off guard very effectively.
Bear Soup Guy: If Rhu wants to try stealthing again I can cast my big stealth vines thingy around him
Ganelon: I'm being cranky towards them, not uncooperative.
It might be incidentally serving Rhu's purposes, but I really am just doing it for its own sake.
Gaurav: There's still a lot of guns around, and Rhu doesn't want to escalate the situation. He's just getting into position to defend Dave if that becomes necessary.
Apheori (GM): Well, there's a guard holding her, but neither of them are actually really doing anything.
Gaurav: and trying to put the building between him and as many guns as possible
yeah, that's why Rhu isn't doing anything either.
Ganelon: This captain wants us together, right?
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Rhu: (to Guard) So how did you guys get here?
Ganelon: Then I'll hobble over to here.
Apheori (GM): The guard that fell over gets up stinkily and freaked out and nearly falls over again.
Radek gives that guard the evil eye.
Apheori (GM): The guard with Dave pushes her over as well.
The evil-eyed guard stares at Radek and starts to back away again, then thinks better of it.
Rhu keeps close to the guard pushing Dave
Ganelon: Yeah, this guy knows what's up.
If he doesn't behave, he's going to face Radek's geriatric fury.
Rhu: Gan: I bet you can't scare him into the grave.
Gaurav: (ooc, sorry)
Ganelon: Hmm...
Guard Captain: Could you just...?
Guard Captain motions to Gravy to join the others.
Frezak (GM): I'll give them a Gravy eye.
Guard Captain: So you all had nothing to do with this?
The Gravedigger: I dug those graves.
Quality worksmanship, that.
Guard Captain: Do you know what happened before that?
Rhu: We just got here. At dawn. We haven't been here more than an hour, tops.
Guard Captain: And why did you come here?
Radek chuckles as if he's just heard the punchline of some great, unseen joke.
Frezak (GM): Because REASONS
Apheori (GM): Heh.
Ganelon: He neglects to actually answer the captain, however.
Rhu: Have you heard of the great God Hazz'ridan?
Ganelon: "This is the work of one of his great machinations. By which I mean obstructions."
Guard Captain: No.
Frezak (GM): Well, are you in for a TREAT, my friend!
Ganelon: "Here, lemme just summon him for you right now. He loves wasting time on stuff like this, trust me."
Gaurav: <.<
Ganelon: The latter is *probably* sarcasm.
(To Greibel): You hear Amadi yell out of the tree, "He means Vitoi, you idiot!"
Rhu: Never mind then. We were escaping from somewhere, and ... we ended up here. We landed on a hill close by (points in the direction of the hill)
Ganelon: I don't think Hazz actually has shown up personally except to deal with matters of actual significance.
You just made us sound like prison escapees, Gaurav.
Greibel looks up
Greibel: She says Vitol.
Greibel points at the tree
Frezak (GM): About time we got air support!
Guard Captain: What, like a prison? You don't...
Ganelon: Pfft.
Guard Captain looks at the tree in confusion.
Ganelon: If you want air support, I could just activate Kepler-4.
Gaurav: Hey, I earned my -1 charisma the hard way.
Guard Captain: So you just wound up here.
Rhu: No, we were escaping from a beast! It attacked us.
And then we just wound up here, yes. Trust me, we're as confused as you are.
Guard Captain: The beast was here?
Rhu: ... what do you know about portals?
Radek: There is a clear metaphysical explanation to your inquiries, but unfortunately, you would neither fully comprehend nor believe it.
Rhu looks around to see if anybody can explain this better than he can
Ganelon: "To answer your inquiries" rather.
Rhu: ... or Arah?
Radek: Shall I explain anyways?
Guard Captain: Fine. Why were you shovelling bodies?
Frezak (GM): Gravy nods sagely.
The Gravedigger: To bury them.
Rhu: Do you have wizards here?
Ganelon: Haha, yessss.
Really though, if he wants to know where we came from, I'm rolling for jargon.
Gaurav: We could just point out that Ajirahd and Irundha of Akrikdirin Vak reign king of the sandcastle. That always confuses me.
Apheori (GM): I just got attacked by a pollonado.
Holy crap.
Aaaanyway.
Guard Captain: You just bury random bodies you find? Why?
Ganelon: Ah, but saying confusing things isn't the same as speaking in confusing terms. The latter not only baffles people, it also makes you look like you know what you're talking about.
Radek: Because he's the Gravedigger.
Frezak (GM): brb
Gaurav: What's pollonado?
Ganelon: I fully expect to be backed up by a "Because I'm the Gravedigger."
It strikes me as that sort of automatic response everyone would say at the same time. and think nothing of it afterwards.
Apheori (GM): Tornado of chickens.
The Gravedigger: Because I'm the Gravedigger.
Apheori (GM): It clucks and everything.
Ganelon: Thanks, Frezak.
Oh, she's playing Guild Wars.
Gaurav: Huh.
Frezak (GM): What, the DM is playing a game at the same that she should be DMing?
Wow, that's professional;
Apheori (GM): I was just standing there.
And then this thing showed up.
It was scary.
Guard Captain stares at Gravy and Radek blankly.
Apheori (GM): GRAVY!
Frezak (GM): Gravy stares blankly back.
Apheori (GM): You hear something charging out of the woods.
The Gravedigger: I hear something charging out the woods!
Apheori (GM): Except there's nothing there.
The Gravedigger: But there's nothing there!
Apheori (GM): >.>
Also Greibel is standing strangely close to you.
Frezak (GM): eh, it's Greibel.
Nothing he does is strange.
Guard Captain: Okaaaay.
Did you notice anything in particular?
Frezak (GM): Did I?
Apheori (GM): You noticed an odd composition of body parts.
Any of you may have noticed the mess inside.
Radek noticed the candel.
candle
The Gravedigger: Well, I don't have enough bits to make three whole bodies.
Gaurav: Did anybody but Gravy hear the charging noise? We should nature-check it.
Apheori (GM): Greibel might have.
I guess he probably did.
Frezak (GM): I think Rhu is pretty perceptive.
Actually I think Rhu's base perception is better than mine.
Apheori (GM): Rhu isn't Greibel.
Gaurav: 'tis sad but
'tis true :(
Rhu's base perception is +14. Isn't Gravy's insanely high?
Ganelon: His passive perception isn't affected by that ridiculous skill.
Because the skill is temporary.
Guard Captain: And how many bodies did the bits come from?
Frezak (GM): Do we know the answer to that?
Ganelon: Not me.
Apheori (GM): No, but you can guess.
All you really know is it's more than how many the number itself would add up to.
Ganelon: Minimum five, right?
Apheori (GM): Oh, aye.
From the hands...
The Gravedigger: Uh.
Lots.
Gaurav: Five heads, so yeah.
Frezak (GM): I thought it was only one head.
Apheori (GM): One on top, a couple more buried.
Gaurav: BSG: could you nature-check the noise Greibel and Gravy heard coming from the woods?
Frezak (GM): Hell, could /I/ ?
I have solid nature skills.
Bear Soup Guy: Either
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Bear Soup Guy: I don't think Greibel was paying attention
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+10
(
18
)
+10
=
28
HOW MANY HAIRS DID IT HAVE?
Apheori (GM): It sounded like a humanoid. A thuddy one. Not very smart.
Gaurav: "A thuddy one"
Apheori (GM): Chaaarging.
Guard Captain says something about needing to take you all in to get your official statements, verify who you are, and work out the paperwork, but he's reasonably sure you're telling the truth about not having done this.
Guard mutters something about having to start all over again.
Guard wants coffee.
Frezak (GM): Like he can verify who we are.
Apheori (GM): He doesn't know that.
Frezak (GM): So what do we do?
Go to town?
With these...... fellows?
Apheori (GM): Oh, I forgot to mention - nobody can hear Greibel when he talks for some reason.
Frezak (GM): Yeah, maybe you should have mentioned that.
Apheori (GM): I meant to mention it when he said something, but then he didn't say anything for awhile and I forgot.
Gaurav: This is what comes from having tea with godlings.
Frezak (GM): Well I'll ask him is he's okay and see if he nods or shakes his head.
Gaurav: I'm happy going to town with these fellows, unless there's something left to be learned at this farmhouse.
Speaking of which, why aren't the policemen investigating the farmhouse? I guess maybe they haven't invented CSI yet?
Frezak (GM): I think it's because they're rubbish.
Ganelon: They need a professional who wears sunglasses so he can take them off and deliver a dramatic title-card line.
Apheori (GM): They're keeping an eye on you.
But yes, Frezak is probably right.
Frezak (GM): I generally am.
Apheori (GM): You are.
Except when you're not.
Frezak (GM): How does Greibel respond?
Ganelon: With a bout of narcolepsy, it seems.
Bear Soup Guy: Oh, to the question
Greibel: Uh...yeah...
Frezak (GM): Onwards!
Apheori (GM): Okay, you all get arrested. They want to take away your weapons.
Frezak (GM): FUCK EM
Ganelon: Oh, I know what to do.
Apheori (GM): A whistling noise comes out of the tree again.
Frezak (GM): The godshard tree?
Apheori (GM): Mhm.
Radek looks pleadingly at the guard captain.
Radek: Would you deprive an old man of his... "walking stick"?
Apheori (GM): What does the walking stick look like?
Ganelon: A very intricate rifle.
Gaurav: o.0
Guard Captain sighs.
Guard Captain: Just put it away.
The Gravedigger: Are we being arrested or helping you with your enquiries?
Guard Captain: Nevermind.
Ganelon: That would kind of defeat the purpose of it serving as a walking stick, but I'll comply.
Is he just giving up?
Gaurav: If we're separated from our weapons, we'll really be in trouble, especially if that's an encounter thudding towards us. Double-especially if it's Amadi and we all end up in prison.
Apheori (GM): Why would you all end up in prison.
?
He seems to be giving up.
You'll need to convince him to.
Gaurav: oh, I thought we were being arrested.
Bear Soup Guy: I should be leaving in about a half an hour, just so everyone knows
Apheori (GM): You were.
Something changed.
For instance maybe it just ocurred to him that there actually IS a checkbox on the form for when extra-planar creatures show up and mess things up.
Gaurav: Hee
Apheori (GM): And he's been out all night in the woods and he's tired and wants to go to bed.
Guard trips and falls in a grave.
Rhu: How did you guys know to come out here, anyway? We tried to find a phone, but there wasn't one.
Gaurav: Hey, what happened to the dog?
Ganelon: Oh yeeeeah.
We should have Griebel question the witness.
Apheori (GM): The dog is sitting on Greibel's feet.
Guard Captain: It was a guess based on the pattern so far. They'd strike in the area. This was the third place we checked.
Are you from the planes, by any chance?
Gaurav: holy crap, YES. Question the dog!
The Gravedigger: Most recently.... sort of?
I think we've been in between planes a bit lately.
Radek: Quite a bit.
Greibel:
rolling 1d20+13 nature the dog I guess?
(
4
)
+13
=
17
Guard Captain stares at Gravy, then brightens up.
Guard Captain: That's great news!
The Gravedigger: really?
Guard: Captain?
Apheori (GM): The dog wags its tail and barks at Greibel happily.
Frezak (GM): AND EXPLODES INTO SLIME
Bear Soup Guy: eeeww, dog slime
Apheori (GM): No, that's what the guard does.
But not for a bit.
Ganelon: Whoa, spoilers.
Frezak (GM): That's some allergy.
Bear Soup Guy: dinner spoilers
Guard Captain: Yes, in fact it simplifies this entire thing.
Frezak (GM): "Now we keeeeel youuuuu"
Guard Captain: I'll just need you to show me something impossible, and we can write off this entire incident.
Apheori (GM): Gravy: You hear him mumble, "And then go to bed."
Frezak (GM): I could.... summon Codrichun.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: What do you do with the dog?
Frezak (GM): Because that solves every problem.
Bear Soup Guy: well I don't think I can interrogate him about a murder on that roll so...
Play fetch?
Radek: Impossible, you say?
The Gravedigger: Oh dear.
Apheori (GM): Okay, Greibel plays fetch with the dog and the Guard captain sighs and shakes his head.
Guard Captain: That's a dog, not... yes, impossible.
Gaurav: What about the orb of protection thing? That's pretty impossible.
Radek withdraws a jar of silvery liquid from his collection of weird shit.
Radek: How about the soul of an inactive Warforged in liquid form?
Ganelon: Thank you, Journal.
Guard: What is it?
Radek: Did you not just hear me?
The Gravedigger: The soul of an inactive Warforged in liquid form!
Ganelon: Is it... jargon time?
Guard: Cool!
What is it?
Ganelon: Okay, yes.
The Gravedigger: The soul of an inactive Warforged in liquid form!
Guard: What is it?
Radek:
rolling 1d20+12 JARGON
(
14
)
+12
=
26
Rhu looks at the guards oddly
Rhu: You guys okay?
Guard Captain nods.
Guard Captain: Okay, that works for me.
Let's...
Apheori (GM): And that's when he gets smashed by an ogre charging in.
That sounds exactly the same as what Gravy and Greibel heard before.
Gaurav: Huh.
The Gravedigger: Oh, so that's what it was.
Apheori (GM): Since Rob needs to go, I think that's probably as far as we should go for now.
Sorry about all of this. You guys are a lot weirder than I realised. I don't know how to deal with that properly. >.<
Bear Soup Guy: And then next time
OGRE BATTLE
Ganelon: Weirder than you realised?
Gaurav: We are pretty weird, yes.
Ganelon: Well, yes.
Gaurav looks at our team admiringly.
Gaurav: I may not be able to make it next Sunday.
But I will try, at least for the first couple of hours. Depends on how early my nephew and niece get up.
Ganelon: This is the only campaign where I get to roll intimidate to be cranky and arcana to spit jargon.
Apheori (GM): Okay, well, everyone show up if you can, and if you can't, I'm sure it won't be terribly interesting anyway.
Just a horde of zombies spawned by the hunger of destroyed worlds.
Or something.
Gaurav: 0.0
well crap
Frezak (GM): Streums!
Apheori (GM): Whazzat?
Frezak (GM): Creatures born from the anguish/hate/whatever of destroyed worlds, possibly.
Gaurav: Rhu's character sheet is at https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u/19429772/dnd-skype/Rhu.pdf and I'm totally happy with any of you playing him if necessary.
Apheori (GM): Cool!
Gaurav: You are good people.
Apheori (GM): Totally.
Or something.
Apheori (GM) runs away.
Gaurav: Hey, Rhu made it all the way through this session without any eels anywhere.
Apheori (GM): AGH! I forgot the eels!
Gaurav: That was unexpected and cool.
Ha!
Their time will come.
Frezak (GM): It was.... The Time Of The Eels
Gaurav: With any luck, we'll fix the universe before then.
So Rhu can get back home and settle back into a comfortable life of devout worshippery and minor undead turning, back to his friends and life and -- AAAGH! EELS!
Frezak (GM): If only they were undead eels
Gaurav: I'm sure they will be
mere death will not stop them &c.

Session 29

Gaurav: I'm here.
Apheori (GM): Is Rob?
Frezak (GM): Boxes say he is.
Apheori (GM): Oh, okay.
Bear Soup Guy: Hello!
Apheori (GM): Everyone! Initiative!
Ellemerr: I should probably have read the log. >.>
rolling 1d20 + 3
(
17
)
+3
=
20
Gaurav:
rolling d20+5 initiative check
(
2
)
+5
=
7
Apheori (GM): Ellemerr: You're in a tree. You were having a tea party with Dave and Greibel and were cross with Dave for some reason. Then Greibel jumped out or something, and then you may have pushed Dave out.
Frezak (GM): 13
Gaurav: Ellemerr: naw, last week was mostly about paperwork, weirdly enough.
Ellemerr: Snrk.
Gaurav: Now rendered moot by rampaging ... ogre, I think?
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20+2
(
6
)
+2
=
8
Apheori (GM): Right, ogre.
Ellemerr: Alright.
Apheori (GM): Frezak, could I trouble you for some pretty icons for the dangerous four?
Gaurav: With any luck, it'll fall into one of the graves and we won't have to deal with it
Frezak (GM): What, /NOW/ ?
I'll have a glance at what I have already on R20.
Gaurav: we're all still at level 5, right?
Frezak (GM): But I'm not going to be making tokens right now, unless you have the time for me do go do so.
*to go do so
Apheori (GM): Eh, they don't need to be fancy. Anything the same general scale should do, if you have them.
I think you're level five. Aren't you? If you are, you are.
Bear Soup Guy: Sure am
Ellemerr: Looks like.
Apheori (GM): I need to find a mouse.
Ellemerr: Athyria, can you... fix the init box so we can all put our numbers in?
Apheori (GM): Yes! For now I have a mouse!
Ellemerr: Yay mousie!
Apheori (GM): Man, so many NPCs.
(From Frezak (GM)): Tokens in Gm layer
Ganelon: Agh, these alerts.
rolling 1d20+2
(
16
)
+2
=
18
There's my initiative.
(To Frezak): Thanks!
(To Frezak): I'd complain about the rabbit, but without my computer I can't do anything, let alone better. >.<
Bear Soup Guy: Holy Ogre!
Frezak (GM): I don't think it's divine.
Bear Soup Guy: Its physique certainly is
Frezak (GM): Dem abs.
Bear Soup Guy: Hubba hubba
Frezak (GM): Roll to keep saliva in mouth!
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Apheori (GM): How do you add labels to these?
Frezak (GM): Labels?
Apheori (GM): And health bars.
Ellemerr: I think you don't.
Ganelon: Nameplate.
Health bars show up to you if they have their HP set as number/number.
If the second field in HP is blank, no bar.
Apheori (GM): Ah, doubleclick, apparently.
Ganelon: We shouldn't see health bars.
Apheori (GM): Right.
Can you see any on the npcs?
Ellemerr: Nnnope.
Apheori (GM): Okay!
Gaurav: wow, Rhu _really_ did not see that coming
Ganelon: Uh.
Maybe there's boxes for visibility?
It's been a while since I was a DM on this site.
Frezak (GM): Boxes? What?
Bear Soup Guy: So...are the guards on our side or the weird creatures' side?
Apheori (GM): Checkboxes.
Good idea.
Frezak (GM): BATTLE ROYALE
Apheori (GM): The guards are not on the weird creatures' side.
Frezak (GM): KILL THEM ALL
Apheori (GM): Basically this massive ogre thing charged out of the woods and crushed the guard captain.
Gaurav: ... crushed?
Apheori (GM): And then a bunch of other things followed it.
Crushed.
Bear Soup Guy: Excellent
Gaurav: Ulp.
Apheori (GM): He's wearing armour so it probably didn't actually kill him, but still.
Frezak (GM): Crushing sounds pretty bad.
Guys?
Don't get crushed.
Ganelon: I'm sure I can fix that.
Frezak (GM): Battle Advice by Gravy.
Ganelon: Gravy, who is likely as easy to crush as a beetle.
Bear Soup Guy is glad to be a ranged combatant
Ganelon: Assuming you are, yourself, the size of that beetle.
Frezak (GM): As easy to crush a man-sized beetle.
Bear Soup Guy: Well that just sounds like so many nightmares
Apheori (GM): Kafkaesque.
Frezak (GM): I loved that book.
Apheori (GM): So anyway, assuming I set everything up right, FIGHTING!
Ellemerr: Should I... find out what I can do, combat-wise? :P
I'm pretty sure I haven't looked at that since lvl 1.
Not much, at least.
Apheori (GM): Also all the newcomers look really strange. Like... kind of dead. And possibly glowing.
Bear Soup Guy: That makes two of us
Apheori (GM): You should probably look.
Bear Soup Guy: I do look at each level but, it's been a while since I was combating >_<
Apheori (GM): At least be better than Dave, whose character sheet I've lost. >.>
Bear Soup Guy: I'm going to just keep throwing fire and vines. I think that's what I normally do anyway.
And really, I couldn't ask for more.
Frezak (GM): Just sit down have a smoko.
Apheori (GM): When it says reach 2, does that ignore triangular geometry?
Ganelon: Depends on the orientation of the triangle?
Bear Soup Guy: The ruler tool should be able to clarify that, I believe
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Frezak (GM): THE TOOL OF KINGS
Apheori (GM): I don't really have space for both the toolbar and the turn order things on this screen. >.<
Okay
Ganelon: Does that diagram help?
Apheori (GM): Nope.
What's the no?
Ganelon: "No, you cannot move/attack using this line.
Because it's a corner."
These rectangles, being holes and not solid objects, are only an obstacle to movement at best.
Apheori (GM): Isn't the yes the same?
Ganelon: No, because it's aligned with the slope. Nothing is in the way.
Apheori (GM): Ah.
So with the corner there it'd have to go around, which is slightly longer?
And would require motion to actually do...
Well, anyway, bandit tries to stab guard and misses.
Amadi! You're in a tree.
Ellemerr: I'll drink tea.
Ganelon: Stunning tactical decision.
Apheori (GM): Excellent.
Guard by the bandit shoots the bandit and backs away.
rolling 1d10 + 4
(
3
)
+4
=
7
Radek: You now have a guard next to you. Go.
Frezak (GM): CHARGE THEM
Ganelon: Don't have a bayonet. Or crippling lack of judgment.
Apheori (GM): CHARGE THE OGRE!
Ganelon: Augh! No!
Frezak (GM): CHARGE HIM LIKE A MAN
Ganelon: Radek deploys E-15A.
It is a small (as in Small size category) robot.
It is part forge.
Frezak (GM): With the tiniest laser.
Oh, that one.
Gaurav: A laser pointer with wings.
Frezak (GM): It's mini-Navrah?
Ganelon: Yes.
Apheori (GM): It's like a combination of Dave and Amadi, but smaller and more useful.
Frezak (GM): brb
Ganelon: One of its arms is clearly intended to launch projectiles.
This is a standard action so it doesn't do much other than roll up to... here.
Apheori (GM): Can you draw it a thingy? Is it the thing significantly in the air?
Ganelon: It's a terrestrial bot
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Ganelon: This is a shitty drawing but it will do.
Apheori (GM): I don't know all your bots.
IT works.
Ganelon: It's his level 5 bot.
Word of warning - it explodes violently on death,.
This ends Radek's turn.
Bear Soup Guy is still glad to be a ranged combatant
Apheori (GM): Why warn? It should come as a surprise to everyone.
Guard behind Dave moves in front of her and flanks Radek.
And tries to shoot the ogre.
He hits and it puts a small hole on it.
in*
Gravy!
Ganelon: Currently being right back, as I understand.
Apheori (GM): When he is back, he will get to charge.
Like a real man.
Like he so wanted you to do.
Ganelon: Let me quote an amazing song/rock opera.
"No, he did not use his hands.
Like a smart man, he used a tool."
Context: murder.
Apheori (GM): Is it murder if they're already trying to murder you?
Ganelon: If they change their minds, maybe.
But today is probably not the best day to debate the ramifications of killing with me. I've already got a lot to think about regarding another roleplaying thing in that area.
Apheori (GM): Today is a day to think about tea.
Frezak (GM): GRAVYTIME
Move:
Free action to Mark the ogre and the bandit.
Standard action: Earthgrasp Strike on the ogre.
rolling 1D20+9
(
15
)
+9
=
24
Vs Ogre AC
Apheori (GM): Yup.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D10+5
(
9
)
+5
=
14
And he is prone.
And he can't try to get up next turn.
And then Gravy will raise his shovel over his head and shout like a Tuskan raider.
Turn over.
Apheori (GM): What does marked do, again?
Also I can't seem to select the ogre...
Gaurav: damn. that's some turn.
Apheori (GM): In fact I can't select anything. The hell?
Frezak (GM): Are you on the right layer?
Apheori (GM): Seem to be.
Agh.
I accidentally deleted at least one of the icons.
Er, turn things.
Gaurav: Two of 'em have moved to the bottom of the turn stack.
Ganelon: Marked means that if the thing makes an attack and the guy who marked it isn't one of the targets, the attack gets -2 to hit against all of its targets.
Imagine it like Gravy or any other mark-applying individual putting stickers on the enemies he hits.
Apheori (GM): Right.
Ganelon: If another thing applies a mark, it overlaps the first one.
Apheori (GM): What is prone, and is there anything the ogre can do while prone if it can't get up?
Ganelon: And they come off usually after one round.
It can still attack, just at... you guessed it, a -2 to hit.
Also it can move at half speed but not shift. And moving provokes opportunity attacks.
Gaurav: Do ogres usually have burst/blast attacks?
Frezak (GM): And they gran't Combat Advantage and can only move as a crawl.
Ganelon: There is an advantage, though. They get a bonus to being hit by ranged attacks.
Apheori (GM): What's the attack for this flatten thing? IT just lists damage.
Should I use the attack vs blah in the above?
Frezak: ^
Frezak (GM): yes.
Ganelon: That's the one.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Ogre takes a swing at Gravy, 18 vs ac.
It's not happy and makes a lot of angry noises.
Frezak (GM): Miss.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Now it's even more unhappy.
A gnoll-like thing comes out of the trees and shoots at Gravy with a longbow that seems to have fused to its arm. Since the arm is now acting like a shaft, does this make it technically a crossbow now?
Frezak (GM): Depends how it uses it.
Main difference is that crossbow arms are mechanically drawn.
Apheori (GM): Well, uh, anyway. 23 vs ac?
Frezak (GM): It's probably still just a bow.
Apheori (GM): Aww.
Frezak (GM): Yep.
Apheori (GM): 10 damage.
Gaurav: Was that a ranged attack against AC?
Cool.
Apheori (GM): THat's what it says.
Dave throws a chicken at Gravy. 11 vs reflex.
Ganelon: Damnit, Dave.
Although that's probably a miss.
I don't think... you can really have 11 reflex at level 5.
Gaurav: That poor chicken.
Frezak (GM): Miss.
Apheori (GM): She was trying to help!
Okay. A chicken doesn't bounce off Gravy.
Ganelon: Beneficial effects aren't rolled against your defenses!
Like my syringes. You literally cannot say no.
Gaurav: The chicken perches on Gravy's horns.
Apheori (GM): Chickens aren't necessarily beneficial.
Ganelon: You just have to grab and inject that shit, and trust that Radek filled it with healing stuff and not Alchemists's Fire.
Apheori (GM): So yeah, she throws a chicken at him and it falls short about a metre.
So then she just pouts at it and then scoots behind the corner.
Greibel.
Gan: The syringes are actually supposed to be beneficial, and you know what you're doing. It's those two things together that probably make the difference.
Bear Soup Guy: Move 2
rolling 1d20+7 vs Bandit Fortitude
(
12
)
+7
=
19
Ganelon: Well yes.
Apheori (GM): Hit.
Ganelon: But I do derive amusement from the fact that the recipients aren't permitted a choice.
Gaurav: Hee. Fort attacks are the best.
Ganelon: Naw, man
Will attacks are where it's at.
Greibel shoots thorny vines from his fingertips toward the unwitting bandit
Gaurav: oh good point
Greibel:
rolling 1d8+4
(
5
)
+4
=
9
Ganelon: Will is legitimately one of the rarest high defenses.
Greibel: and I pull the bandit two squares in my direction, unless he falls into that open grave along the way
Gaurav: it's also more fun watching someone trying to stop an attack with their mind.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: The bandit oozes black blood.
Ganelon: Indeed.
Apheori (GM): And falls in the grave.
Ganelon: I have a whole character dedicated to that. She's pretty great.
Also pretty evil. Telepathy is not nice.
Gaurav: What class is she?
The Gravedigger: GRAAAAAAAVE
Bear Soup Guy: ^_^
Gaurav: BSG: nice! We holed a bandit!
Ganelon: Wizard/Warlord.
Apheori (GM): Should falling in a grave knock someone prone?
Ganelon: But uh... don't think too much about how that works.
It's complicated and messy.
Bear Soup Guy: It should definitely do something
Gaurav: Cool. I gotta try something that sometime.
Ganelon: Frezak hates it.
Gaurav: I think he should roll to land on his feet.
Frezak (GM): Thse graves aren't deep enough, sadly.
Apheori (GM): Aww.
Frezak (GM): SO he's just 5 feet down.
Apheori (GM): Oh well.
Frezak (GM): It's not some crazy deep grave since I don't have coffins for them.
Ganelon: 5? Not even 6 feet?
Apheori (GM): Greibel: Anything else?
Ganelon: You lazy sod.
Bear Soup Guy: That's it for my turn
Ganelon: That's even a saying.
Bear Soup Guy: I have to admit I'm also disappointed Gravy doesn't dig the classic 6 foot grave
Frezak (GM): 6 is un-necessary for a uncased corpse.
Apheori (GM): The other Guard around the corner pushes past the midget and old guy and rushes into the fray!
Or as close as he can get.
Ganelon: How brave of him.
Apheori (GM): Very.
He yells "For great justice!" and shoots at the ogre.
And completely misses.
Gaurav: Oof
Bear Soup Guy: His heart was in the right place
Apheori (GM): Alas, it was not to be.
Gaurav: And soon it shall be on the floor outside his body.
Apheori (GM): Suddenly a cute little bunny monster rounds the corner.
Bear Soup Guy: How delightfully morbid
Gaurav: Aw!
Apheori (GM): It charges and leaps at the guard.
Ganelon: The prone captain would get to take a swing at it for that.
'Course, you could say he doesn't.
Apheori (GM): Hmm, good point.
Frezak (GM): Does the forgebot get an oppie?
Ganelon: He is kind of underfoot.
Actually, yes!
That is a thing, that it does!
Apheori (GM): Remind me how this works?
Ganelon: They just get to make a basic attack (should have a circle with a sword in it somewhere, usually the worst kind a creature can make) during the bunny's movement.
Once per creature per turn, so once one guy takes an opportunity attack you can run circles around him safely.
Also keep in mind that he's got a -2 to his attacks while prone
Frezak (GM): Heads up, I have about 2 hours.
Ganelon: And then a predicted absence of what, one hour?
Frezak (GM): Or two.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Ganelon: It'll give me a chance to sleep, at least.
Gaurav: I will definitely have to leave in 2 hours to catch a train, but somebody else can take over for Rhu once the encounter is over. Assuming he doesn't die.
Ganelon: Well, except Mac's game is scheduled in about two hours, so really I'm trapped in this marathon.
Apheori (GM): The guard doesn't take an opportunity attack due to not even seeing the rabbit (and, let's face it, they were never trained against bunnies), but I assume the bot is a bit smarter than that. Roll it or whatever?
Ganelon: Yes, E-15A flares to life at the sight of cute animal life approaching.
And expels FIRE.
rolling 1d20+5+2+2 vs. AC
(
8
)
+5+2+2
=
17
I don't know why fire is against AC, but whatever, them's the rules.
Apheori (GM): It misses.
Does it at least set the thing on fire?
Please tell me it sets it on fire.
Ganelon: On a miss? No.
Apheori (GM): Dammit.
Ganelon: And sadly it just does purely fire damage, no ongoing.
Apheori (GM): Hmph.
Ganelon: I'm disappointed too!
Bear Soup Guy: I'm frightened
That's pretty high AC for a bunny
Ganelon: At least it does more than my weapon, by a little, but mostly I just use robots to be cool.
Apheori (GM): Okay, a non-flaming bunny leaps at the hapless guard and tears his throat out.
The guard is now dead.
Gaurav: 0.0
Ganelon: Oh fuck, it's *that* bunny.
Apheori (GM): Rhu!
Gaurav: Move 4
Frezak (GM): THings looks bad, guys.
Gaurav: The ogre's not at all bloodied, is he?
Frezak (GM): Well, except that my graves are filling themselves;
Apheori (GM): Nope.
Frezak (GM): That's pretty sweet.
Gaurav: Then I place an oath of consuming light on the ogre
Frezak (GM): That sounds like a badass oath.
Bear Soup Guy: Only the really cool monks get to take that oath
Gaurav:
rolling 1d20+7
(
7
)
+7
=
14
+2 for prone?
+2 for CA? or does that count once?
Apheori (GM): What's it against? I thought the prone was CA.
Gaurav: vs AC
no sorry
vs Reflex
Apheori (GM): Big difference, that.
You hit the big hunk of abs!
Ganelon: Prone is CA.
Gaurav: yay!
Ganelon: Doesn't stack with other CA sources.
Gaurav: so +16 vs reflex. Still hits?
Apheori (GM): Mhm.
Gaurav: Nice.
Apheori (GM): You can't move that much abs too quickly.
Frezak (GM): Much abbage.
Bear Soup Guy: Godly abs are a blessing and a curse
Frezak (GM): Mostly a blessing.
Gravy has pretty superhuman abs.
IN that he has 18 str.
Sorry, 19.
Bear Soup Guy: Abs vs Abs
Gaurav: Do I get to add half-level to my WIS for the damage?
Apheori (GM): I dunno, do you?
Frezak (GM): No.
Gaurav:
rolling 2d10+5 radiant damage
(
4
+
4
)
+5
=
13
(To Frezak): Undead take double with radiant, right?
Gaurav: Whenever I hit the ogre with a divine attack, it takes an extra 1d6 radiant damage (save ends)
(From Frezak (GM)): Just 5 extra damage.
(To Frezak): Ah, thanks.
Ganelon: Oh. He'll need an icon for that.
Gaurav: There's an aftereffect, but that doesn't start until after the 1d6 damage ends, right?
Ganelon: Correct.
Gaurav: Cool.
Ganelon: Once he succeeds a saving throw, more badness abounds.
My favourite aftereffect ability will always be Thrall.
Gaurav: Is there any reason for me not to use an AP and try to hit the bandit, too?
Apheori (GM): It's just you, right? Doesn't do anything if someone else hits it with a divine attack.
Ganelon: Hit: The target is dominated (save ends)
Aftereffect: The target is dominated until the end of your next turn.
Gaurav: It's just me.
Frezak (GM): Don't confuse things, Gan!
Ganelon: Yeah, ignore that.
Nobody is a level 25 Psion here. Probably.
Apheori (GM): Ogre is now bloodied, and the blood really stinks.
Gaurav: Yay!
Stinky blood for everyone!
Bear Soup Guy: Methinks that ogre has been stuffing his abs
Gaurav: Ha!
Apheori (GM): Rhu: Anything else?
Gaurav: So: AP? I don't have a good attack left -- my daily heals me, so I'll save that for when I need it; one encounter teleports us two squares away, and the other is best when charging.
Frezak (GM): Eh, save the AP for when we need it.
If we need it.
Gaurav: Okay.
If we're alive to use it.
Minor: oath of enmity against this bandit at my feet.
Frezak (GM): Rhu looks down and says "You! You're my enemy! I swear!" ?
(To Ellemerr): It's a pity that the bunny only has one lethal attack in it. I'd so like to terrorise and kill them all with it...
Gaurav: Pretty much!
Apheori (GM): Snrk.
But you just attacked something else.
(From Ellemerr): You are the kindest DM. No, really!
Gaurav: I don't have to only attack my enemy.
It improves my melee attacks
(To Ellemerr): Not that kind! It's just a zombified recreation of a fight in a fractal in GW2. The bunny there had a massive cooldown between attacks.
Gaurav: And it lasts until the end of the encounter or the end of the bandit, whatever happens first.
whichever*
and Rhu is done
Apheori (GM): Right, but it's confusing. And in that vein, the bandit snarls something angry and confused and unintelligible at you.
Rhu gives the bandit a confused, unintelligent look
Frezak (GM): You're trying to mimic him?
BLend in with the radioactive zombles?
Apheori (GM): I think Rhu is just kind of... slow.
So the guard captain gets up. Should that prompt an opportunity attack?
Gaurav: I was expecting human words from a human bean, so the unexpected language switch confuses him.
Frezak (GM): Poor Rhu.
Apheori (GM): Bean?
Gaurav: being. homophone. If that's the phone I want.
Bear Soup Guy: "I am not an aminal! I am a human bean!"
Frezak (GM): I don't want a homophone near MY face.
Apheori (GM): I guess it's better than a humming being.
Frezak (GM): "I am firmly rooted in the vegetable kingdom!"
Gaurav: ha! humming beans. mmm, mmm.
Apheori (GM): Oy, does proned guy getting up prompt opportunity attack(s)?
Frezak (GM): Nope.
Ganelon: Not in 4th edition.
Gaurav: Okay, I should go talk to relatives and stuff as they're awake now. I'll be back, but if anything hits Rhu, his defences are: AC 18, Fort 14, REF 16, Will 18
Apheori (GM): Oh, okay.
Guard captain gets up.
Ganelon: Yeah, I think they changed that because prone really, really sucks to get hit by.
Now you can prone more easily than ever but it's less of a big deal.
Apheori (GM): Frezak, this inspire zeal thing... it's got a little cone icon. Does that mean it targets like a cone?
It says allies within five squares get 5 thp.
Ganelon: Sounds like a close burst.
But "cones" in this are usually close blasts.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Ganelon: Meaning, the number specified as one side of a square (ie: 3x3), and the square must be adjacent to the user.
Apheori (GM): Gravy and Rhu get 5thp.
Because the captain considers them allies and, like, inspired them.
Ganelon: Otherwise, a burst is just that number's worth of squares away from the guy in all directions.
How nice of him.
Apheori (GM): And now he calls a target on the ogre and the remaining guards get a shot at it...
Both hit and do some damage.
Frezak (GM): It should be a burst.
Apheori (GM): Oh, is it a box with radius?
What's a burst?
Frezak (GM): So omindirectional inspiration
Ganelon: Yeah, like...
There's a burst 2.
Apheori (GM): Okay, so Rhu doesn't get it.
Just GRavy?
Ganelon: If its range is 2.
Apheori (GM): Says within 5. That means burst range 5? Which means radius, not diameter, right?
Agh confusion.
Ganelon: It means radius.
This is a burst 5.
Apheori (GM): Oh, wow.
Okay.
Ganelon: Yeah, they're no joke.
Apheori (GM): Temporary hit points for everyone!
Ganelon: But keep in mind that only friendly bursts target areas this huge.
Unless they're hostile but only target a single enemy (basically meaning, it gets around being considered a ranged attack but still has range)
Apheori (GM): Heh.
Thanks. >.<
Bandit takes a swipe at Rhu from the grave. Does that work?
Let's say that works.
Ow, math hurts my head.
Ganelon: It works. He's not in that deep.
Apheori (GM): 28 vs ac
Ganelon: At worst you could say he's attacking "around a corner".
Frezak (GM): -2 from mark, not that that helps.
Ganelon: Oh, uh...
Can Radek feasibly see this bandit as he does this?
Apheori (GM): A big spear comes out of the hole and swings at Rhu and... uh... there it is. Yeah, that hits.
He can see its head. And the spear.
Probably.
Ganelon: Good enough, I suppose.
He has a power. Interrupt with the trigger being a successful attack being made on an ally.
It doesn't stop the attack. Radek just shoots the attacker before he deals damage, and on a hit, his target resists a bit of the damage.
Actually the resist... persists. Until the end of my next turn.
Anyway, I will use this.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Ganelon: (Rifle Weapon Attack 20)
Is that a hit?
Apheori (GM): Against what?
Ganelon: AC.
Apheori (GM): Nope.
Ganelon: Shame.
Well, sorry Rhu.
Apheori (GM): So the bandit hits Rhu with the spear, knocking him down.
Gaurav: Yay!
No, wait the other thing
Boo!
Bear Soup Guy: Welcome back, Gaur!
Frezak (GM): Woo things
Apheori (GM): He also tries to climb out of the grave and eat Rhu's feet, but that doesn't work.
Amadi!
Frezak (GM): Actually.
As a reaction to him attacking Rhu.
I slide him 1 and he is slowed.
Gaurav: I'm not properly back. Breakfast has been called. I'll see what I can do, but I'll definitely be back for my next full turn in the encounter.
Apheori (GM): Heeee, slowed.
Gaurav: And yet not as slow as Rhu.
Apheori (GM): It's okay. Nintendos still pass through him, at least.
Ellemerr: Amadi laughs at the graved bandit and yells at him about how incompetent he is. And she mocks his spear. If he doesn't speak normal language, she'll probably automatically do this in gibberish.
rolling 1d20 + 6
(
18
)
+6
=
24
That's against will.
Frezak (GM): Looks like pretty mighty mockery.
Apheori (GM): Oddly, it works, though the bandit seems more confused than ever.
Ganelon: Well yeah, she's doing it while sipping tea.
Of course it's a vicious mockery.
Ellemerr: Most likely. His attack is now -2 until the end of Amadi's next turn, and he takes...
rolling 1d6 + 4
(
4
)
+4
=
8
dmg.
Apheori (GM): And yeah, it came out as gibberish. Really... horrible-sounding gibberish. That gives everyone around a bit of a headache.
Sounds a bit like empty graves scraping against dried-out tentacles.
Ellemerr: Wheee
Frezak (GM): Ew.
My graves!
Ellemerr: That's it from Amadi.
Apheori (GM): Dr. Fred!
I mean, Radek!
Frezak (GM): Dr.Fred ?
Apheori (GM): The Edisons in Day of the Tentacle were very reminiscent of Radek.
Aside from the lack of beards. That was a little strange.
Ganelon: Radek continues to do nothing personally!
In fact, why not double up on bots?
Apheori (GM): But I can totally see Radek putting on that massive grin and pulling a hefty slew of chainsaws and other tools out of his pocket in a flurry of productivity.
Ganelon: I activate Kepler 4.
That is also sadly a standard action because wow does 4E hate summoning help.
Frezak (GM): Behold.... art.
Apheori (GM): Fancy.
Ganelon: It is hovering two squares above ground level.
Radek steps further back.
Apheori (GM): Eye-level for the ogre?
Ganelon: Technically no, his eye level is one square up.
Apheori (GM): Man, that guy's fat.
Ganelon: But it's within his reach. Except he's prone.
Apheori (GM): Oh, aye.
Ganelon: Not that there are rules for that, but there probably should be.
Gravy would be most cross if the eyebot were harmed, I'm sure.
Anyway, I do have the ability to order one of these to move, but I won't.
So that's turn over.
Next turn I get, they'll totally be doing things I can't.
Apheori (GM): Guard shoots ogre, guard completely misses and hits Gravy.
(sorry, rolled a 1)
Frezak (GM): Great job guards.
Ellemerr: I might end up mocking him next time. That does deserve some mockery.
Apheori (GM): 5 damage.
He rolled a 1 on damage too.
That's... um.
Frezak (GM): And THP gone.
The captain saved from the incompetence of his minions.
Apheori (GM): He yells something that sounds a bit like 'oops, sorry'.
Other guard tries to shoot the ogre too, and actually hits what he was aiming for.
Gravy, you're up.
Frezak (GM): Okay.
TIme to be awesome.
First: I use my Chainreach Shovel.
I attack the Gnollthing.
rolling 1D20+9
(
19
)
+9
=
28
Vs Gnoll AC
Apheori (GM): Yup.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D10+5
(
5
)
+5
=
10
And it is prone.
that's a minor action.
I use my move action and devolve it into another minor.
And Activate my Form Of the Fearsome Ram.
Apheori (GM): The bunny single-handedly took out a guard, and yet everyone is ignoring it. Why?
Frezak (GM): Standard Action: Form of the Fearsome Ram Attack.
Ganelon: I'm not ignoring it.
I left my robot there to probably get wrecked by it next turn.
Bear Soup Guy: I'm thinking about what the best strategy would be for attacking it
Frezak (GM): I shift my speed which is 8 right now.
Ganelon: And backed far, far away from it.
Frezak (GM): To here.
And attack.
Ganelon: Such that it would have to provoke at least three opportunity attacks from capable people to reach me.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+9
(
7
)
+9
=
16
Vs Fortitude.
Apheori (GM): Smart.
Ya hits it.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 2D10+5
(
1
+
4
)
+5
=
10
+5 from headsman's Chop
So 15.
Apheori (GM): Apparently the recommended kill order here is bunny, bandit, gnoll, ogre.
Frezak (GM): I then push it 3.
Ganelon: The cool thing about both of my 'bots working together is that the eyebot normally only shoots lasers when my allies hit (incidentally its range is too short to help Gravy here).
Frezak (GM): And get to follow it.
Free action: Mark Orge and Gnoll.
Bear Soup Guy: Gravy's in full badass mode today
Ganelon: But bots aren't me, they're allies.
Frezak (GM): Action Point: Roots Of Stone.
Apheori (GM): Does the eyebot zap them, then?
Ganelon: Only if he hits.
For each target hit.
Frezak (GM): Close burst 1? attacking Ogre then GNoll.
rolling 1D20+9+2
(
14
)
+9+2
=
25
rolling 1D20+9+2
(
1
)
+9+2
=
12
Against AC.
Apheori (GM): Hits ogre and your foot.
Ganelon: Add 5 to Shrek over there.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D10+5
(
9
)
+5
=
14
And +5 on Ogre.
So... 24 on ogre.
Apheori (GM): You mean 5 damage to ogre? And another 24?
Ganelon: No.
24 total.
Frezak (GM): Total 24 damage.
Ganelon: 5 from the eyebot.
Apheori (GM): Oh, for the attack?
Well, it's dead.
Frezak (GM): Turn over.
The GNoll is now fucked.
Bear Soup Guy: That was a thing to behold
Apheori (GM): Can the gnoll get up?
Frezak (GM): Hey, don't I get something from using a daily item?
It can.
Ganelon: You do.
You gain 7 THP for using an item daily.
Apheori (GM): Gnoll gets up.
Frezak (GM): As it does I lean over it and shout
Apheori (GM): Does that cause anything?
The Gravedigger: GRAAAAAVES
Frezak (GM): Nope.
Standing up is just a move action that does not provoke bad things.
Apheori (GM): Okay. It hits gravy with its fused hand thingy thing.
21 vs ac to actually do anything.
Frezak (GM): Nope.
Apheori (GM): It doesn't actually do anything.
Frezak (GM): I am Gravy, not the Graved.
Apheori (GM): It hisses something horrible and scratchy.
Frezak (GM): Gravy is not impressed.
Apheori (GM): Dave!
Will hop over to the bunny.
Ganelon: You fooooool!
Gaurav: Dave! Noooooo!
Frezak (GM): Better it than me.
Dave waves vigorously.
Dave: HAI BUNNY!
Gaurav: Homicidal bunny vs god rage fragment
This should be ... interesting
Apheori (GM): How do you do a grab?
Ganelon: Strength vs. Reflex.
Apheori (GM): Because Dave will now try to grab it.
Ganelon: As in, d20 + 1/2 level + strength.
Apheori (GM): Holy crap, she actually succeeds.
Ganelon: I imagine hers is rather bad.
Apheori (GM): It's terrible.
Ganelon: ...Huh!
Gaurav: o.0
Ganelon: Well, stranger things have happened.
Like Radek and Gravy going simultaneously crazy in the worst (best) way possible.
Apheori (GM): I don't know for sure, but I'm just assuming it's 0.
Anyway, she grabs the bunny and puts it in her pocket.
Bear Soup Guy: >_<
Frezak (GM): We'll have to bury both.
Just to be sure.
Apheori (GM): ...okay, I did not expect that.
Anyway, Greibel.
Bear Soup Guy: Well, this has changed things. Let's see...
okay
rolling 1d20+7 vs Bandit reflex
(
10
)
+7
=
17
Ganelon: It's hard to go wrong with screaming "FIRE HAAAAAWK"
Bear Soup Guy: I've got something even better than screaming FIRE HAAAAAAAWK :D
Apheori (GM): Yup.
Frezak (GM): BE EMBRACED IN HER TOASTY BOSOM
Greibel reaches a hand majestically to the heavens, rending the very fabric of the weather and calling forth a rush of dark and ominous clouds, cracking with thunder and raining lightning bolts down upon the Bandit from the sky
Greibel roars slightly
The Gravedigger: Duuuuude.
Greibel:
rolling 1d8+4 damage
(
4
)
+4
=
8
Ganelon: Oh right.
Gaurav gasps
Ganelon: ...Well that's not as much damage as I expected.
Frezak (GM): That's lightning?
Greibel: I think the eyebot unfortunately takes some damage too
Apheori (GM): The bandit hisses something horrible and screeches like the sound of a primary schoolteacher's claws on chalkboard.
Ganelon: Uh, that depends.
Firstly!
Bandit takes 5 from the eyebot's laser.
Gaurav: Apheori: eeks!
Ganelon: Second, what, is it an area burst?
Bear Soup Guy: -2 to Bandit's attack roles until after my next turn, and if he leaves the 1 radius zone around him during that time he takes 5 damage
an area burst 1
Ganelon: Eyebot's fine. It's floating 3 above him.
Bear Soup Guy: oh, cool
Ganelon: Even though, you know, lightning would come down in a column.
...Which would also make the power fail indoors.
Frezak (GM): It's ball lightning.
Bear Soup Guy: ^
Apheori (GM): Muh physics!
Bear Soup Guy: and that's end of turn
I should really look for some minor actions on my future level-ups
Ganelon: They're not easy to find.
Apheori (GM): Rhu!
Gaurav: Okay, I can't attack the bunny because it's been Swallowed By A God's Pocket. Should I focus on the gnoll or the bandit?
Ganelon: Usually on utility skills, though we do get one of those next level.
Gaurav: I feel like the bandit is more dangerous, but he's also ... stuck in a pit. Sort of.
Ganelon: You have an oath on the bandit. I assume this influences your decision.
Apheori (GM): Also the dead ogre is emitting a really horrible stench. Like overpoweringly so.
Gravy's fine, though.
For now.
Ganelon: Radek is likely glad that he's so far away from it!
Gaurav: Is the bandit Undead? Should I roll something to check that?
Apheori (GM): It may be.
Gaurav: I have a power that only works on undead.
Apheori (GM): How do you check these things?
Also my mum is kicking me out of the kitchen. Apparently my being on the computer playing games makes her uncomfortable.
Frezak (GM): GAMES?
As an Avenger I think he should be able to tell.
Ganelon: Well, THE RULES say that you roll religion to determine knowledge about undead.
Frezak (GM): if not, heal check minor action.
To determine whether it IS undead, if that's in question.
Ganelon: But that may mean knowing about undead, once you know they ARE undead.
Frezak (GM): Though it's genreally not in 4E.
Typically you know when a undead is undead.
Ganelon: I agree with Heal, being more about medical knowledge, helping to determine when it's in doubt.
Gaurav: He is in a pit. Make it harder to check his pulse and stuff.
Ganelon: Well, you could see if he's breathing.
Apheori (GM): Well, they don't look quite like normal undead, but from the smell they could be.
Ganelon: That would be a big clue.
Apheori (GM): Examine the blood.
He's bloodied.
Of course it could be a disease.
Gaurav: Can I do that from here, or should I jump into the pit?
Apheori (GM): And contagious.
And the only reason Gravy is fine is because of his massive fortitude...
Gaurav: Does his blood contain ... eels?
Frezak (GM): You're prone, jumping would be more of a slither down.
EELS?
Gaurav: Slither at him with grave fury.
Oh right
What's the penalty to ranged attacks while prone?
Ganelon: To make them? None.
Apheori (GM): Dammit!
Ganelon: Attacking a prone enemy with ranged gives you a -2.
Apheori (GM): I forgot about the eels again.
Gaurav: You've still got like an hour to fix that
Okay
Rhu remains prone for the mo'
Apheori (GM): Right.
Rhu, before you do anything else, d20.
Gaurav:
rolling d20
(
7
)
=
7
Ganelon: Here we goooo
Gaurav: Really hope this is one of those lower-is-better/madder things
Ganelon: Also, I was wrong, all attacks while prone are made at -2.
My apologies.
Blame sleep deprivation.
Frezak (GM): I will.
Gaurav: Screw you, sleep deprivation.
Apheori (GM): Rhu, you feel kind of ill. It might be the stench from the bandit, or the dead ogre. It's hard to tell.
Now keep going.
Gaurav: Or the bunny-in-a-pocket to my right.
Move action: stand
Standard: Abjure undead. "You send a brilliant ray of radiant power at an undead foe, compelling it to stagger toward you."
Apheori (GM): Greibel: I need a nature roll.
Amadi: d20, please.
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20+13
(
3
)
+13
=
16
Ellemerr:
rolling 1d20
(
2
)
=
2
Gaurav:
rolling 1d20+7 vs will against the bandit
(
5
)
+7
=
12
huh
does the slowed give me CA?
Apheori (GM): Rhu: Bandit makes funny noises and looks at you in confusion.
Frezak (GM): Not unless you have a feat to get it.
Apheori (GM): It fails.
Gaurav: okay
I still get half-damage on miss
Ganelon: Maybe so, but the eyebot is disappointed in you.
Gaurav:
rolling 3d10+5 radiant damage
(
8
+
4
+
2
)
+5
=
19
Ganelon: And refuses to come to your aid.
Gaurav: so half of that is ... 9?
Ganelon: That's right.
Gaurav: IF bandit is undead
if not, none of this works
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You get a sense that there is something very wrong here, that these zombies, while technically dead, were reanimated with something even more unnatural than the usual. Also what they (and Amadi) said sounded really familiar for some reason.
Gaurav: oh oops
Apheori (GM): It works.
Gaurav: it's 4d10 at level 5
Bear Soup Guy: Well that's definitely unnerving
Gaurav:
rolling d10
(
5
)
=
5
so 24/2 = 12
Apheori (GM): Plus another five for undead damage vulnerability?
Ganelon: To radiant damage?
Gaurav: if they're vulnerable to radiant damage, then yeah
Ganelon: If they have that.
Frezak (GM): After the halved damage.
Gaurav: or divine
PLUS
I pull the target a square towards me
would have been up to 6 squares if I'd hit
we practiced a LOT with undead clearly
Apheori (GM): It's in a grave, man.
How far can you really pull it?
Gaurav: I was hoping to pull him into the wall of the grave
Frezak (GM): Faceplant?
Apheori (GM): Well, you did that.
Gaurav: bodyplant
okay
minor action
I'll do a from-a-distance heal-check on the Bandit to see if I can learn anything about (1) human, age, etc. and (2) this weird black-blood situation
rolling 1d20+12 investigative heal check on the bandit
(
17
)
+12
=
29
Apheori (GM): You're right next to it. This means no touching, then?
Ganelon: Peeping from five feet away, really.
Gaurav: yeah. I think touching him would probably give him an opportunity attack.
Apheori (GM): It's all vertical.
Apheori (GM) cackles.
Gaurav: if any blood is splattered on the ground near me, I'll touch that. otherwise, just: human? age? good health? famished? etc.
Apheori (GM): Um, anyway, you discern that it's a zombie, it's not the kind you're used to, it's kind of like the one that you dropped in the sinkhole, it seems a bit more advanced, and it's talking at you in the back of your mind trying to compell you to... to...
You get a horrible abdominal cramp.
Gaurav: Knocking me prone?
Apheori (GM): It was human, 20s-30s, really stinky, and there is some blood. Do you touch it?
Naw, you're still standing. It just distracts you.
Gaurav: On second thoughts, no. I'll wait until after combat when I can get some gloves or something. No touching.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Rhu bends over slightly and goes "oof"
Gaurav: Cool. End of my turn.
Greibel: Hang in there, man. We're winning!
Apheori (GM): Guard captain calls a target on the gnoll-thing and the guards have shots at it.
Gaurav: BTW, I keep forgetting this, but: if you roll an attack against my oath of enmity target (currently: the bandit), once per encounter one of you gets to re-roll your attack roll against it
Bear Soup Guy: Ah, nifty
Apheori (GM): They shoot it. It oozes.
Gaurav: And use either result.
Apheori (GM): It's gross.
Ganelon: Oh, hold up.
Guard Captain: Eww.
Ganelon: How many shots hit it?
Apheori (GM): 2
Ganelon: Pew pew, 10 laser damage.
Bear Soup Guy: Nice!
Apheori (GM): And it's down.
Ganelon: Eyebot!
Gaurav: Woo eyebot!
Frezak (GM): Goddamit, my Gnoll!
Ganelon: Not only a great expendable flying scout, also kills your enemies!
But only when you hit them
It has to make you work for *something*.
Bear Soup Guy: Fair trade
Apheori (GM): Gravy! What's your fortitude?
Frezak (GM): 18?
Apheori (GM): Oh, okay. Thanks.
What does the bandit need tosave?
Is that a 6?
Bear Soup Guy: Remember the bandit is currently also taking -2 to attack rolls from being in the THUNDER ZONE
Frezak (GM): Save against what?
Oh, the Rhumagic?
D20, 10 or higher is successful save.
Ganelon: All saves succeed on a result of 10, yes.
Apheori (GM): Oh.
Ganelon: There are various penalties and bonuses for... things.
Gaurav: Nope, I didn't do saveable to the bandit afaik
Apheori (GM): Well, the bandit tries to take another swipe at Rhu. IT completely misses and loses its spear.
Ganelon: But all are conditional.
Gaurav: HA
Rhu: HA!
Bear Soup Guy: Poor bandit
This was not how he planned on spending his day
Ganelon: Does something need to be mocked further?
Apheori (GM): I'm starting to wonder about these dice.
Frezak (GM): If this bandit lives I'll bodyslam it.
Ganelon: Because I see Amadi next on the turn order.
Gaurav: Gravy charges at the grave and falls upon the bandit.
Frezak (GM): I strategically collapse the grave.
Apheori (GM): Bandit tries to crawl out and eat Rhu's feet again.
Gaurav: We peer down. There is a Gravy shaped hole in the ground.
Frezak (GM): "It's all right, guys, I have Codrichun to keep me company"
Rhu: My delicious feet are my own, foul undead spawn.
Apheori (GM): Bandit fails to climb out of the grave at eat Rhu's feet again.
Okay, Amadi, go.
Amadi has laughed more and more as the fight progressed and now promptly falls out of her tree.
Gaurav: She's a pro, that one.
Amadi 's laughter turns into a high-pitched scream.
Frezak (GM): Oh goody.
Amadi:
rolling 1d20 + 6
(
6
)
+6
=
12
vs bandit will
Apheori (GM): Alas, no.
Gaurav: Would you like to roll again?
Ellemerr: Er. *shrugs*
Do you want me to?
Gaurav: Is it a lot of damage if it hits?
Frezak (GM): bards generally don't do big damage.
They're support classes.
Ellemerr: 4! And Rhu (I think) gets to attack it. Basic attack.
Gaurav: okay. never mind, then. my basic attack is pretty crappy. we'll save it up for a big hitter.
Amadi resumes sniggering.
Ellemerr: Radek.
Frezak (GM): I think I'm the only person with a statted MBA.
Ganelon: Radek does nothing!
E-15A uses his standard action (wow I hate 4E summons) to shoot down at the bandit.
rolling 1d20+4+2+2
(
18
)
+4+2+2
=
26
AC. I assume that hits.
Apheori (GM): Mhm.
Ganelon:
rolling 2d6+5+5
(
3
+
4
)
+5+5
=
17
Apheori (GM): Even despite being mostly graved.
Ganelon: That's 12 Fire and 5 Eyebot.
Apheori (GM): And it's dead.
Gaurav: Hooray!
Frezak (GM): What about the rabbit?
Gaurav: I don't suppose anybody wants to keep the bandit alive to answer questions?
Ganelon: We may never see it again.
Apheori (GM): Rabbit is... gone.
Do you want to keep the bandit alive?
Gaurav: Given that Greibel and Amadi might be able to understand it.
Ganelon: Or Dave may pull it out as part of a magic trick and get someone killed as early as tomorrow.
Dave: I'd need a hat.
Bear Soup Guy: Can we mercilessly snap the bandit's neck after extracting information from it?
Apheori (GM): Yes, she just randomly said that to nobody in particular.
Gaurav: Is the rabbit more or less dangerous than the sphinx? Only one way to find out!
Frezak (GM): I'd rather just bury it now.
Gaurav: It is already conveniently located inside a grave.
Frezak (GM): And bury Dave and the rabbit while I'm at it.
I know!
It's set up for me!
Gaurav: Yeah, let's just kill it.
Bear Soup Guy: Fair enough
Gaurav: Are we out of initiative?
Apheori (GM): Yes.
How much time before everyone needs to run?
Bear Soup Guy: I'm here for as long as everyone else is
Gaurav: I need to take a shower sometime in the next hour.
Ganelon: I cannot sleep.
There is yet more D&D waiting for me today.
Ganelon mutters darkly to himself. "Always... always sunday."
Apheori (GM): Poor dear.
Frezak (GM): I have no idea how much longer I'm around for.
Apheori (GM): Well, this could be a good time to end it, perhaps.
Since the questions haven't yet begun...
Gaurav: That works for me!
Apheori (GM): "Is this your undead monster?" "No, is it YOURS?"
Bear Soup Guy: Yeah, I think we should examine these corpses next time
Frezak (GM): I have more graves to dig!
Ganelon: "Gentlemen, please be civil or my two servitors here will be forced to identify you as threats."
Frezak (GM): OUt of politeness I'll give the dead guard the best grave.
Apheori (GM): What about his family? What would they say, knowing he's buried so far away?
What if they want his body?
Frezak (GM): Fuck 'em.
I dig graves.
I bury things in graves.
Apheori (GM): Oh gods.
Gaurav: He's not cruel. I'm sure the invoice he sends them will have detailed instructions on locating and exhuming their loved one
Frezak (GM): that is what I do and by Codrichun am I GOOD AT IT
Gaurav: as well as a corpse-back guarantee.
Frezak (GM): EXHUMING? ARE YOU INSANE?
Gaurav: hey, while we're here
Apheori (GM): What, do you case them in concrete?
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+12 heal check on myself to investigate what those horrible abdominal cramps were earlier
(
20
)
+12
=
32
I'm sure it was just dehydration
Apheori (GM): Rhu: There's an eel in your major intestine.
Frezak (GM): That's a knowledge check you could without knowing the answer of.
Gaurav: "Major" intestine? They're both pretty major.
Apheori (GM): Shush.
Gaurav: :P
Frezak (GM): Your 'favourite' intestine.
Apheori (GM): I'll go with that.
See you all next week for eel-filled fun?
Ellemerr: Eels!
No, actually. I'll be gone. Again! For two weekends!
Apheori (GM): Tsk tsk.
Ellemerr: Sorry. >.>
Apheori (GM): I mean, CUUUURSSE YOU.
Frezak (GM): Curse your ears!
Ellemerr: I can play on weekdays between these two weekends.
Not this week, but the one after, I mean.
Apheori (GM): Wait, any reason we can't do that?
Bear Soup Guy: I should be good for most weekdays next week
Apheori (GM): CAN ANYONE NOT DO NEXT MONDAY?
Ganelon: I can.
Bear Soup Guy: I think I can
Ganelon: But I'm leaving this R20 session now.
Bear Soup Guy: Assume I can unless I report something else later
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Bear Soup Guy: Adios Gan!
Apheori (GM): Frezak? Gaurav? Merr?
Ellemerr: ... Oh, I don't actually get back till tuesday.
Frezak (GM): I can probably do monday.
Ellemerr: When I look closer. >.>
Go me!
Apheori (GM) shoos everyone back to skype.
Gaurav: All my intestines are my favourite. Well, both.
Bear Soup Guy: This fight was a bloobath
or even a bloodbath
Gaurav: Would've been worse if Dave hadn't stolen the bunny
Bear Soup Guy: oh god, yeah...

Session 30

Ellemerr: *pokes a dead rat*
Gaurav: Why a dead rat?
Apheori (GM): Do we have Frezak?
Ganelon: She's run out of live ones, of course.
Gaurav: Ah. That makes sense.
Ellemerr: What? No no. I have plenty rats of all states. Dead, live, undead, unliving, redead, half-dead, ghostly, spirits... maybe the occasional god rat, but I think Teleoth ate them.
Apheori (GM): Which Teleoth?
There are so many.
Ellemerr: Possibly more than one.
Apheori (GM): Oh.
Ellemerr: *nods*
Apheori (GM): Is Frezak here? I don't see him, but I also don't trust this interface.
Gaurav: Then? Why poke a dead rat when there's so many to choose from?
Ellemerr: I think he's actually not, but I have told him that - oh, there he is.
Apheori (GM): Oh, okay.
HAI FREZAK.
Ellemerr: Because the dead ones giggle nicer. Duh.
Apheori (GM) waves a dead rat in his face enthusiastically.
Frezak (GM): Yoyoyo BACKUP DM IN THE HOUSE
WASSSSUUUUUUP
Gaurav: Oh!
Gaurav nods cautiously
Ellemerr stares blankly.
Frezak (GM): Let's get this SHIT OOOOON
Ellemerr: I'm not sure that is Frezak after all.
I sort of hope it isn't.
Apheori (GM): He's talking like an uncyclopedian.
Frezak (GM): Let's RP THE SHIT OUT OF THIS
BITCHES
Apheori (GM): Specifically, a really drunk one.
Ellemerr: Oh, there he is.
Ganelon: He's acting pretty whack today.
Ellemerr: He's just channelling Scissors.
Frezak (GM): My new PC is Groinslapper Mc Awesome.
Apheori (GM): Anyway, y'all are still in front of the farmhouse. The dog has run off. There are body parts all over the ground, as well as some more really stinky ones.
bodies, I mean.
Frezak (GM): Bard/barabarian.
Barbarbarbar
Apheori (GM): Where the hell are my notes?
Ellemerr: I'm not sure if there were any uncyclopedians at the con. If they're like that, I didn't notice any.
Mind you, I stayed away from people in my usual terrified manner.
Apheori (GM): Rhu claims to have an eel in his major intestine.
Ellemerr: I fell out of a tree.
Apheori (GM): We don't really have many uncyclopedians with money. Those with money tend not to be raging drunks.
Ellemerr: Or Amadi did.
Apheori (GM): Dave has an undead killer bunny in her pocket. Amadi might want to eat it, I dunno.
So Rhu...
You feel really ill.
And you have an eel inside you.
How does this make you feel?
Ellemerr: There could've happened to be an uncyclopedian in London. That would've made it less horribly expensive.
Apheori (GM): Aye.
Probably were a few.
Especially given the overlap with wikipedia.
EHU!
RHU
Rhu looks around at everybody again
Rhu: I ... think ... eel ... in my ... *points*
The Gravedigger: I'm going to need more graves.
Rhu keels over and starts to groan
Gaurav: Ehu is a much better name than Rhu
Ellemerr: Sounds like a ghost sneezing.
Dave: Hey Gravedigger, you know how you DIDN'T turn into a zombie?
Gaurav: Is the eel (and he definitely needs a name) doing anything apart from clogging up my intestines? Is it bitting ripping tearing feasting?
The Gravedigger: Always?
Greibel moves over to check on Rhu
Apheori (GM): It's just clogging.
Dave points to Rhu.
Dave: Check it out!
Gaurav: Okay. While I'm still conscious, I'm going to heal-check myself to see what I can figure out about ... this situation.
Amadi picks herself off the ground, checks the tree for fall damage, and looks in Dave's general direction.
Greibel:
rolling 1d20+11 heal check
(
15
)
+11
=
26
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+12 heal check on meself
(
20
)
+12
=
32
Dave sits down on the dead guard's body to watch.
Ganelon: I think we've identified the problem, folks.
Apheori (GM): MAn.
Ellemerr: Man you know yourself in and out.
Frezak (GM): Didn't you crit last time you eelechecked?
Gaurav: Yes.
Apparently Rhu is proficient at eeling.
Ellemerr: *giggls*
Frezak (GM): Eelage.
Gaurav: We could try to lure it out with a fish.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: He seems ill. Like, really ill. Possibly about to go into shock.
Ellemerr: *runs after a rebellious e and tries to put it back in her word*
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You determine something really important and horrible and then pass out.
Rhu: Oh. OH.
Rhu grins
Rhu passes out
Frezak (GM): Hmm.
Amadi trots over to the others to get a better look at this very interesting eel business.
Greibel: I think Rhu just realized how he's going to get that thing out of there...
Frezak (GM): I could pinpoint the Eel.
Can Radek use Tundering armour on his guts to crush the eel within the organs?
Radek sighs and pushes the two guardsmen aside.
Radek: Out of the way. Doctor, mechanic, and all-around /genius/ passing through.
Ganelon: Uh...
I think we don't want a crushed eel so much as one anywhere but in his guys.
Guts*
Apheori (GM): The guard captain also comes over to look.
Frezak (GM): Does anyone have any power to teleport things?
Apheori (GM): Gravy: You may notice that he seems to be sweating a lot.
Frezak (GM): Can't Greibel magic vine-rip it out?
Bear Soup Guy: That would be....interesting
Gaurav: I can teleport things. Namely me.
Radek: Hmm...
Radek looks meaningfully at his eyebot.
Frezak (GM): Surgical laser?
Ganelon: Yessss
Frezak (GM): You'd stilll have eelbits.
unless you cut him open and the druid pulled.
With minimum collateral.
Ganelon: Well, at least half of that lets me blame someone else if he dies, so sure.
Frezak (GM): I could pin him down.
Amadi moves slowly around the guard, tip-toing behind Radek, and attempts to get next to Dave without her noticing.
Amadi probably looks totally silly and obvious while doing this.
Frezak (GM): Stop him strugglin'
(To Gaurav): The important horrible thing you discovered is that you are also infected with some sort of zombie thing.
Frezak (GM): Amadi is muttering 'stealthystealthyquiet'
Dave moos at Amadi.
Frezak (GM): 'notasoundnotasoundnotasound'
Ellemerr: Actually, Frezak, if I did that I would probably turn the volume of the whole world (or at least our nick of the woods) down.
(From Gaurav): Oh phew. I thought it might be worse than having an eel in my intestines, but it's only just as bad.
Radek: I'm going to cut him open.
Ellemerr: Or something equally godly/silly.
Gaurav: Any chance Greibel could commune with the eel and convince it to come out by itself?
Frezak (GM): Gravy will hand Radek a throwing Trowel.
A BattleTrowel if you will.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You can wake up now.
Gaurav: Not that I mind being cut open in a field by a blood-covered farmhouse or anything.
Frezak (GM): The eel is probably dead, no?
Amadi makes spider noises at Dave.
Bear Soup Guy: Greibel could certainly try talking to the intestine eel
Frezak (GM): We're experts, Rave.
Don't worry.
Ellemerr: Why would it be dead?
Gaurav: Apheori: do I have to?
Frezak (GM): Because being in guts is a terrible place.
Gaurav: It sounds awfully painful.
Ganelon: To the sight of a scowling old man/his beard and an eyebot scanning his midsection?
Bear Soup Guy: That entire scene would make an epic as hell painting
Gaurav: Haha
Lemme roll to stay unconscious
rolling d20
(
9
)
=
9
Ganelon: Well fine, to spare him the undoubtedly horrible pain of what's to come, I actually did come prepared.
But tell me how that goes first.
Apheori (GM): Fine, you don't wake up.
And no, it isn't dead.
Ellemerr: Knew it!
Gaurav: Yay! Sweet, sweet unconsciousness.
Ganelon: Okay. I use the inappropriately named Restorative Infusion.
Which restores jack shit, but does give him 20 temp HP.
Apheori (GM): And Greibel would know that it should also be moving - digging, eating its way to get out in a frantic struggle.
It's not clear why it isn't.
Ganelon: Then I'm going to have the eyebot bore into his flesh with a laser.
If I may.
Bear Soup Guy: Maybe he likes it in there
Gaurav: Did my previous THP expire once we got out of encounter?
Dave offers Amadi something that looks like popcorn but is probably actually fried exploded crickets or something.
Ganelon: I dunno, THP doesn't stack.
Bear Soup Guy: After all, if biology dictates that an eel show up in somebody's intestines, maybe it's beneficial to the eel
Ganelon: So you're at 20 either way.
Frezak (GM): THP lasts until you take a short rest.
Apheori (GM): It's not normally beneficial.
Roll history.
Even though this is really a 'reading random stuff on the internet' check.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+7
(
8
)
+7
=
15
I don't even know if anyone else trained history.
Ellemerr takes the not-popcorn and hands Dave a can of mountain dew. Possibly of the variety you actually find in mountains in the morning.
Ellemerr: I do. Want me to roll? Assist?
Dave munches on the snacks and watches intently.
Ellemerr: Anything?
Apheori (GM): Do it.
Ellemerr:
rolling 1d20 + 6
(
14
)
+6
=
20
Apheori (GM): Ellemerr: You've heard tell of several eel incidents. It's not good for the eel. It's also not good for the host. In fact it's basically horrible all around.
Something something animal abuse.
Frezak (GM): GOSH REALLY
Apheori (GM): Radek: Feel free to laser at will.
Gaurav: OH NO
PETA
Ganelon: LASERING.
Frezak (GM): I'll hold Rhu down.
Ganelon: If there's a margin for error here, do tell me.
Frezak (GM): With my Gravy Grip
Apheori (GM): Roll aim. Or something.
Ganelon: Not so that I'll stop, just for rolling purposes.
My aim?
Apheori (GM): The guard captain helps you hold him down.
Gaurav: What does the guard captain make of all this?
Frezak (GM): You want assist on that, Gan?
Ganelon: Suuuure.
Apheori (GM): Like, uh, roll some sort of medicine.
Surgery.
Stuff.
Frezak (GM): Heal check?
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+9 "Heal"
(
5
)
+9
=
14
Frezak (GM): Assiting
Ganelon: Uh ooooh!
Frezak (GM): Wait, no
I suck at that.
NEVERMIND
Bybye rhu
Ganelon: Well this is why we give our patients THP before we start.
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20+11 assist?
(
20
)
+11
=
31
Apheori (GM): RHU: ROLL TO WAKE UP.
Bear Soup Guy: Ah yeah bitches, that has to count now
Gaurav:
rolling d20
(
9
)
=
9
Frezak (GM): if Rhu wakes up I'll nut him until he goes unconcious again.
Apheori (GM): Radek: With the annoying assistence of Greibel, you cut him open.
Frezak (GM): Greibel who clearly is the one that know the difference between a liver and a pancreas.
Ganelon: Do I see an eel?
Frezak (GM): "I dunno, it's all organs to me!"
Apheori (GM): Without any real blood or what have you, just going around a bunch of slimy slippery organs.
Frezak (GM): "Stupid meatbags!"
Ganelon: Hey, maybe Radek was looking for Rhu's combustion manifold.
Apheori (GM): There's an eel-shaped lump in the intestine itself. Do you open the intestine?
Ganelon: Certainly.
Frezak (GM): TALK TO THE EEL
Nature check to talk to eels?
Ganelon: Well it'd be rude to not talk to its face.
Apheori (GM): Another one for intestine itself!
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+9
(
12
)
+9
=
21
Apheori (GM): Because, like, intestines are really messy.
Ganelon: They really are.
Radek isn't very fond of doctoring.
Apheori (GM): That's why he's using a remote laser instead of his hands.
Right?
Ganelon: Yes.
Apheori (GM): Rhu is still asleep.
The intestine comes open with a little seepage.
Ganelon: Also because he made an eyebot and damnit, he's going to make the most of it.
Apheori (GM): There's an eel. It's still not moving.
Just sitting there.
Gaurav: This is the most important sleep Rhu has ever had
Frezak (GM): You find the God Eel
Nature check to talk to eels?
Radek: Well, I'll be.
That really is an eel.
Greibel: It sure is.
rolling 1d20+13 Eel Talk
(
15
)
+13
=
28
The Gravedigger: He's a Hazz cultist, he should know about slimy tentacly things.
Dave: (to Amadi) He pissed someone off, didn't he?
Radek: Could we get a tank of water over here?
Gaurav: "Eel Talk"
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You talk to the eel.
Radek looks expectantly at the godlings.
The Gravedigger: Guard! Get a bucket of water!
THis eel needs our help!
Amadi shrugs.
Amadi: I wasn't paying attention.
Amadi starts pulling a pool out of her pocket.
Dave: Huh?
Frezak (GM): TO one of the surviving guardlings.
Dave: Oh.
Gaurav: Hazz' cultists don't usually talk about slimy tentacular things: we worship him as a point in space or as the Great Ending. And He is not slimy.
Frezak (GM): And now we all drown.
GOOD JOB RADEK
Apheori (GM): The guard looks around in confusion.
Frezak (GM): He was totes tentacular.
Guard: Um...
Ganelon: This is probably the strangest thing that has ever happened to him.
Guard wanders off looking for a bucket.
Amadi keeps pulling at the pool. It's a kiddy garden pool. Very pretty patterns and cheerful colours.
Bear Soup Guy: That is amazing
Dave looks impatient, then drops a tank of water on Radek's head.
Bear Soup Guy: There's no situation where pulling big things out of pockets isn't awesome
Dave: Er... that didn't work either.
Ganelon: I HOPE YOU MEAN JUST THE WATER
AND NOT THE WHOLE TANK
Apheori (GM): Nope, whole tank.
Amadi looks disappointed at Dave and the tank of water and starts putting the pool back in her pocket.
Dave hides behind Amadi.
Ganelon: I'm pretty sure that would *kill* him.
Gaurav: So that's ... five graves we're up to now?
Apheori (GM): In this case let's just say the entire thing was upside down, so he mostly just got drenched and then got a bit of a bonk on the head.
The tank disappears immediately after.
Ganelon: Words cannot accurately describe the look he would give her for this.
Ellemerr: What? No more tank?
Aaaw.
Apheori (GM): Sorry.
Ellemerr: I was totally using that tank.
I guess I'll go back to my kiddy pool.
Apheori (GM): Because Dave is now hiding behind Amadi, Amadi may get the brunt of the look.
Ganelon: Oh no, this look is armor-piercing.
Apheori (GM): Also the other guard comes back when nobody's looking.
Frezak (GM): And he is a wyvern.
Amadi very quickly gets the last bits of pool out of her pocket and tries (and fails) to look innocent.
Apheori (GM): He shakes his head when nobody's looking and then just sort of stands there hoping nobody will notice him.
Rhu: Roll to wake up.
Ellemerr: I'm slowly figuring out I've forgotten most everything I once knew about playing the flute.
Gaurav:
rolling d20
(
14
)
=
14
Frezak (GM): I think you have to make igh notes that make people scream and fall over.
Apheori (GM): Rhu wakes up and starts screaming.
Ganelon: Still being held down?
Ellemerr: Quick, dump him in the pool!
Apheori (GM): Still held down, unless Gravy wants to let him go.
Frezak (GM): I nut him.
Ganelon: Radek will attempt to grab the eel and pull it out.
Frezak (GM): With my mighty skull
Rhu gasps for breath, then continues screaming
Apheori (GM): Nut him?
Frezak (GM): Headbutt.
Bear Soup Guy: Does anyone have a sleep spell?
Gaurav: My AC is 18 and my fort is 14. Which one would that be against?
Ganelon: Nope, that's a wizard thing.
Frezak (GM): Uh, AC.
Rhu has now started including profanity in the screaming
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+11+2
(
19
)
+11+2
=
32
Vs Rhu AC
I believe that hits.
Apheori (GM): Did Greibel ever actually talk to the eel?
Rhu: 18 AC, so yes!
Gaurav: ooc
The Gravedigger: Sorry, Rhu.
Bear Soup Guy: I think at the moment talking to the eel would kind of get in the way
Apheori (GM): Radek: You grab the eel and pull it out.
Rhu is knocked out.
Ganelon: Lovely.
Bear Soup Guy: But I did do the roll so if the eel is feeling very distressed at the moment I'd probably know that
Frezak (GM): Greibel rolled eeltalk.
Apheori (GM): Also there may be brain damage.
Rhu 's screams go up a register, and then he blacks out again
Gaurav: ... for the eel, right?
Apheori (GM): Greibel: The eel is completely panicked, and there's something horribly wrong with Rhu and it doesn't want to touch it, let alone eat it.
Frezak (GM): Even the EEL doesn't like cultists!
Apheori (GM): But as soon as Radek pulls it out it calms down a lot and then starts actually struggling.
Frezak (GM): I Mark the Eel.
Ganelon: He'll toss it into the pool, then stab Rhu with two of his healing syringes (I'm pretty sure these can reconstitute flesh, anyways!), and walk off to wring water out of his beard.
Ellemerr: Put it in the pool.
Frezak (GM): In case it gets bitey.
Amadi makes eel noises.
Gaurav: Eel: "ew ew he's religious get him away get him away"
Apheori (GM): The eel flies into the pool and swims around a bit.
The syringes...
Don't work.
Gaurav: ... don't work?
Apheori (GM): Don't work.
Frezak (GM): Not good.
Ganelon: This has ceased to be Radek's problem.
Frezak (GM): Hah
Ganelon: As far as he's concerned.
Apheori (GM): XD
Frezak (GM): More healchecks please!
Gaurav: I still have 20 THP, so any damage -- including Gravy's headbutt -- should be coming off them first. Apart from brain damage, I guess.
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20+13 on Rhu HEALING THINGS
(
19
)
+13
=
32
Frezak (GM): Jeebus.
rolling 1D6+5
(
3
)
+5
=
8
Well the attack would only be
Apheori (GM): Greibel: So, um, Rhu might be turning into a zombie.
Frezak (GM): Oh great.
Just.
Great.
INTO THE HOLE YOU GO
Gaurav: Huh
Frezak (GM): We'll find a new Striker.
Gaurav: 12 THP
You can keep me around for experiments and stuff
Bear Soup Guy: Hmmm
Gaurav: Throw me through a portal and see what happens
Amadi attempts talking with the eel.
(From Amadi): "You really didn't like Rhu, did you? Is the pool okay? It was the only one I had on me. I think."
Bear Soup Guy: Zombies would be...religion check?
Ganelon: Zombie knowledge is normally religion.
Amadi looks at Rhu and sighs.
(To Amadi): The eel is terrified. It tells you it can feel itself changing, dying, like the horrible place it was, and it's helpless, utterly helpless...
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20+8 is Rhu definitely turning into a zombie
(
7
)
+8
=
15
Ganelon: Or perhaps I should say, normal zombie knowledge is religion?
I'm sure I could make a science zombie and you'd be totally clueless about that, for instance.
Bear Soup Guy: I assume either that or the heal check will cover it
Apheori (GM): Greibel: This isn't a normal zombie. In fact you're not quite sure what this is.
Frezak (GM): It's... A CULTIST ZOMBIE
Werezombie!
Bear Soup Guy: Science Zombies, sounds like a conservative radio talking point
Amadi leans into the pool and tries to help/fix the eel.
Bear Soup Guy: Is there anything Greibel can do to stop the zombifying, fix Rhu's open wounds, or make him less dead?
Gaurav:
rolling d20 to wake up
(
12
)
=
12
Apheori (GM): The eel swims around Amadi.
Frezak (GM): Look, I know what to do with dead guys.
I'M AN EXPERT
I GOT THIS
Apheori (GM): BSG: Not that you know of.
Rhu wakes up again.
Gaurav: How is he feeling pain-wise?
Bear Soup Guy: Well he's still cut open, right?
(From Ellemerr): Should I... roll any eel helpage? I even have healing things. Like, actual spells and stuff. Though maybe I should rather use that on Rhu. xD
Gaurav: But also possibly undead
Bear Soup Guy: Good point
Greibel panics a bit
Frezak (GM): I'll... release the zombie.
Bear Soup Guy: Well Greibel hasn't told anyone else that he's maybe a zombie
The Gravedigger: All good, eel's out!
Bear Soup Guy: Unless someone else checked that
Frezak (GM): Gravy wouldn't know.
Bear Soup Guy: Right-o
I think he'll keep it secret until he can find out WTF is happening
Greibel: Rhu? How you feeling, buddy? Sorry about the, uh....open chest cavity.
Rhu blinks
The Gravedigger: Sorry about the skull thing, too.
Amadi looks up from her eel for a moment.
Amadi: Oh, yeah, um, Rhu, dear, you're probably contagious in some way or other. But it might only count if someone gets stuck in your guts.
The Gravedigger: I was improvising.
Contagious?
What, MORE EELS?
Amadi goes back to her eel.
The Gravedigger hides behind Amadi.
Gaurav: me blinks
Gaurav blinks
Gaurav: That's quite the image.
Amadi: (without looking up this time) Oh, I hope not. Poor eels.
The Gravedigger: Oh, okay.
The Gravedigger ceases hiding.
The Gravedigger: Well, what then?
Gaurav: Apheori: is Rhu feeling his own abdomen cut open? How bad is the brain damage?
Ganelon: THP *should* help with the not-feeling.
Apheori (GM): Amadi: d20 to fix the eel.
Amadi: Just the general horribleness, you know. Death and undead and stuff. Zombies. Possibly Krasue or killer squash, but I don't think so.
rolling 1d20
(
12
)
=
12
Ellemerr: I'm a horrible eel-fixer.
And I really thought telling it "Well, good, now get better" would help, too!
Apheori (GM): Gaurav: Rhu feels really sick, his gut is cut open and that hurts a lot too.
Mostly just sick, though.
Frezak (GM): I hand him some booze.
Apheori (GM): The eel swims around sadly.
Rhu closes his eyes and leans back
Frezak (GM): I'll poke him with the bottle.
Rhu: Did you get it out?
Dave goes and tries to fix the eel too.
The Gravedigger: Yep.
Dave:
rolling 1d20
(
10
)
=
10
Rhu ignores the poking
Apheori (GM): The eel dies.
Gaurav: *Six* graves
Amadi looks very sad.
Rhu: So ... I guess I'm infected with some sort of zombie thing.
Amadi says eely death-prayers in eel.
Rhu accepts the bottle and tries to drink some without turning over too much, wincing as he does.
Amadi: It's a bad sort of zombie thing.
The Gravedigger gets to digging.
Amadi points to the dead eel as case in point.
Greibel: Guys, is there any reason I shouldn't mend this gaping hole in Rhu's body?
Rhu nodes
Rhu nods
Rhu: Is there any other kind?
Rhu tries to stand up
Amadi: There's the kind that gets better when I tell it to?
And there's that one kind that dances polka! I love that kind.
Dave: Woah, woah, woah, careful!
Dave runs to help Rhu not stand up.
Rhu looks down and notices that his abdomen is still crudely sliced open
Rhu: Oh, right
Frezak (GM): CRUDELY?!
YES.
Radek is a terrible medic
Gaurav: Can I feel the zombieness kicking in? Would that take the pain away?
Apheori (GM): Not crudely. Very precisely.
It just makes you ill.
Gaurav: Oh right, sorry. Laser beams.
Rhu lies back and prays to Hazz' for strength and guidance and so on
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+9 religion check
(
11
)
+9
=
20
Frezak (GM): Guidance, strenth, blah blah blah, you know the drill, Lord.
Gaurav: More like "srsly dude eels and zombification? in one day? i hope you thought this through."
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You suddenly can't move and then pass out again.
Everyone else: Rhu goes really stiff and passes out. He also looks like he's glowing.
Ganelon: I don't do surgery crudely! Just irresponsibly!
Amadi says with some contempt, "Oh, god..."
Apheori (GM): And this is when the guard captain grabs Dave and holds a gun to her head.
Guard Captain: Everyone stop! Just stop!
Gaurav: Maybe it just looked crude because Rhu was looking down at it? It's an odd angle to look at.
How rude. I hope Rhu rebelliously keeps on glowing.
Amadi rises her eyebrows in a "Well, he's lost it" manner.
The Gravedigger glances at the captain then resumes digging.
The Gravedigger: That's a terrible idea.
Radek doesn't stop, but he's washed his hands of this mess already so it's probably not relevant to him anyways.
Ganelon: Figuratively, of course.
Ellemerr: Washed it in beard water.
Guard Captain: Stop! Stop!
Ganelon: Rhu's blood is not actually on his hands.
Dave: Oy.
Ganelon: Well, maybe a little.
Amadi: Stop what, exactly?
Ganelon: He did grab the eel.
The Gravedigger: These graves won't dig themselves.
Trust me.
I'm a expert.
Guard Captain: You won't take me! You can't!
Guard Captain starts pulling Dave backwards.
The Gravedigger: Seriously.
Terrible idea.
That is the worst hostage ever.
Amadi: Hey!
Amadi looks offended.
Amadi: I could be a much worse hostage!
The Gravedigger peers out the grave.
The Gravedigger: Okay, then.
Dave: Oh, you are on!
The Gravedigger: Switch and see.
Actually.
The Gravedigger leaps out the grave.
The Gravedigger grabs Amadi.
Dave elbows the guard captain in the gut.
The Gravedigger: Nobody move or the midget gets it!
Short person?
Whatever you are.
Gnome?
Guard Captain: Stop! Stay back!
The Gravedigger: Dwarf?
Guard Captain: Shut up!
The Gravedigger: You're supposed to make demands I think.
Amadi: YOU shut up! We're having a very important experiment here!
The Gravedigger: Silent, hostage!
Amadi giggles. Loudly.
The Gravedigger hold Amadi up and wobbles her about a bit.
Greibel looks back and forth and slowly realizes that everyone has lost their minds
Amadi looks like she might be made of jelly for a bit. Very wobbly.
Frezak (GM): SUPPLE BODY?
Ellemerr: YES
Frezak (GM): WHEEEEE
Ellemerr: I feel sorry for the guard captain.
The Gravedigger: I demand... uh....
Amadi: COOKIES!
The Gravedigger: Yeah!
Biscuits!
Amadi: Cake!
The Gravedigger: Pastries!
Amadi: Weird pastries with cream in them!
The Gravedigger: And icing!
Amadi: And blueberry candy!
The Gravedigger: Now, there's no need to be greedy.
let's be reasonable, here.
Gaurav: I wish I wasn't dead so I could gape at everybody in confusion.
Frezak (GM): Well, your torso is gaping.
That's a start.
Bear Soup Guy: zing
Amadi: ... Reasonable?
Amadi sounds confused.
The Gravedigger: Your turn, Mr Captain.
Guard Captain picks up Dave complete and turns around and runs into the woods.
The Gravedigger: Let's see some demands!
hey!
Amadi: Hey!
The Gravedigger flings Amadi at the Captain
The Gravedigger: CATCH
Ganelon: "You forgot the other one!"
Ellemerr: ... Oh my.
Frezak (GM): Like a javelin.
SO she can stick her arms out like superman.
Ellemerr: I think we might need DM input on how that goes.
Guard Captain: Roll improvised weapon: midget attack.
Gaurav: Incoming godling!
Apheori (GM): Er, ooc.
Frezak (GM): Or not, I don't care as long as she soars.
Ellemerr: Can I roll assist: being an improvised weapon? Or am I untrained in that?
Frezak (GM): Acrobatics to steer yourself?
Apheori (GM): Sure.
Ellemerr: Sounds good to me!
rolling 1d20 + 9
(
15
)
+9
=
24
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+7+2
(
2
)
+7+2
=
11
Whoops
Ellemerr: ...
I am SO disappointed in you.
Frezak (GM): I forget to let go.
I WAS EXCITED
I was caught up in the rush!
Apheori (GM): Amadi sails through the air and misses the guard captain completely, instead doing a faceplant into one of the graves.
The Gravedigger: Woops
Ellemerr: I could inspire competence but I doubt the +2 would be enough. >.>
The Gravedigger: Uh
Apheori (GM): One of the guards runs after him as he disappears into the woods. The other says, "Um."
The Gravedigger: Sorry about that!
Amadi: ... Ow.
The Gravedigger: Um.
Sorry, it was the sugar.
Amadi: He's taking Dave.
Dawn*
The Gravedigger: Is that a problem?
Ellemerr: Since Amadi calls her Dawn. Yes. I remember how my character works.
The Gravedigger: For us, specifically?
Radek looks at the last remaining guard.
Radek: Run away, you fool. You're doomed if you stay and you're doomed twice over if you follow your comrades and... /Dave/.
The Gravedigger: I mean, I can see it being bad for him.
Guard: Right, then.
The Gravedigger: If you could tell us where the nearest town is before you run that would be great.
Guard: I'm going home.
Radek: ...I wish I could go home.
The Gravedigger: Don't worry about the corpses!
Amadi: Dawn doesn't have a Key. And we might need her later. And damnit NOW HOW ARE WE GOING TO DECIDE WHO'S THE WORST HOSTAGE?
Amadi kicks the grave angrily.
The Gravedigger: I think I'm the worst hostage-take if that's any help.
Guard: You probably want Dorgin. It's down the road to the west.
Guard gets his leave on.
Frezak (GM): I'll carefully reach in to see if I can help her out.
As in if she'll let me >.>
Apparently I /don't/ inspire competence.
Amadi tries ignoring Gravy and climb out herself, find out that she's much too short, and grudgingly accepts anyway.
(To Rhu): So Rhu... you could be doing better.
Frezak (GM): I'lll... uh.... get back to digging >.>
Gaurav: Is Rhu still unconscious?
Amadi approaches Rhu and Greibel.
Apheori (GM): Guarav: Yes and no.
Amadi: So, this is a mess.
Apheori (GM): He's not conscious exactly, but he hears Hazz and he can speak if he wants to.
(From Rhu): (I can't seem to whisper at Hazz, but this will do) ... *nods*
Greibel: Yeah...
Do you have a thread and needle in your universe pockets, per chance?
(From Rhu): It looks worse than it is, really.
(From Rhu): Is this my end?
Amadi: But what about cleaning up all of... that?
Amadi waves a hand over Rhu in general and his insides in particular and makes a disgusted face.
Greibel: Eh, the inside of the body is pretty disgusting in general
But right now we really need to sew him up so he doesn't die of exposure and stuff
Frezak (GM): Stuff!
Gaurav: Seeing as how everybody has run away, maybe the best move would be to stuff Rhu into the pocket universe and head for the city
(From Ellemerr): Does he seem to be more undeady horrible on the inside? Any reason for the eel to feel particularly bad about it?
Gaurav: They'll have doctors and stuff there, although I don't suppose they'd know anything about this zombie sitch
(To Rhu): Not today.
(From Ellemerr): Particularly, does there seem to be any sort of "origin spot"?
Bear Soup Guy: The zombie thing will be more difficult to deal with yeah
But if I can just remind everyone, Rhu is literally cut open
His organs are visible
Frezak (GM): Well we close his torso before we move him.
(To Ellemerr): He just got splashed. It's all it takes anymore, and in time, it won't even take that.
Bear Soup Guy: ^
Frezak (GM): Somehow.
(From Gaurav): Huh.
Hazz'ridan fixes Rhu.
(From Rhu): That's probably going to hurt like the dickens, then.
Frezak (GM): I could wrap him up with rope.
Oh.
great.
gods.
Ganelon: How fixed, exactly?
Amadi: (in her most sarcastic voice) Lovely.
(To Rhu): Don't get infected. Avoid the darkness, if you can, but it will know you now. So keep it off.
Apheori (GM): Wound closed, zombieness going away.
Frezak (GM): Huh.
Well that's... that.
COuldn't do the eel, huh.
It's a God isalamari.
Apheori (GM): He can also wake up properly if he wants.
Rhu opens his eyes
Rhu: The darkness will know me now.
Er.
Hi.
Amadi: Yes. Really, just... lovely.
Greibel: I...well, okay. Sure.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+12 heal check on himself as he pats himself down
(
11
)
+12
=
23
Apheori (GM): You seem fine.
Rhu tries to stand up
Apheori (GM): Roll sanity.
Rhu:
rolling d20
(
5
)
=
5
Apheori (GM): Rhu zones out and gets a bit euphoric.
Ellemerr: brb
Frezak (GM): GODS.
Apheori (GM): Gods are the worst.
Rhu stands up and looks this way, then that. He looks up at the sky, then down at the ground. A small smile, shining with the joy of a life restores fills his face, then explodes into a wide, wild, all-encompassing beam.
Rhu steps towards the trees, falls into a grave and is knocked unconscious.
Gaurav: And I'd strongly recommend you keep him that way, otherwise he's going to insist on going after Dave.
Apheori (GM): Quick! Bury him!
Ganelon: Yes!
Gaurav: It's the only way.
Well, that or the rope. Or the bottomless bag of doom.
Frezak (GM): Put the grave in the bag!
The Gravedigger: Hey, that's for dead people!
Outta my grave, darnit!
Ellemerr: Well, Amadi might insist on that on some point anyway. And she's harder to knock out.
Frezak (GM): Well maybe if you ASK FIRST
Goddamed cultists.
Gaurav: Yeah, so, what's next? Don't make me wake Rhu up. You won't like him when he's awake.
Ganelon: I'm clueless.
Frezak (GM): CULTIST
Go to town?
Ganelon: Sure.
Gaurav: I like this plan, even if Rhu doesn't. I assume the guard will have to go back to the guardhouse eventually, and in the town they might know where that is.
Are we all, ah, covered in blood or something?
Frezak (GM): I shouldn't be.
Ellemerr: I'm not.
Frezak (GM): I mostly pounded on prone things.
Ellemerr: Dirt, maybe. I've done a lot of falling.
If that counts for "or something".
Bear Soup Guy: I probably have some of Rhu's blood and ick on me
Ellemerr: I think I should be more or less safe from eel ick considering it was in a pool.
Gaurav: Cool. To the town?
Ganelon: I'm as presentable as a murderously spiteful old man with a wet beard can get.
Ellemerr: Sure. Amadi will do some why-aren't-we-trying-to-get-Dave complaining, but not too heartfelt, and she'll follow Greibel nicely.
Frezak (GM): To the town!
Gravy will sing songs of his own devising.
Ganelon: They had better be good.
Frezak (GM): They won't be.
Ellemerr: "But we wacked them with our shovels and they died, died, died"?
Frezak (GM): They said the stuff was good and the lied, lied, lied!
But I already quoted that one.
Ellemerr: Oh.
It's the best one.
Apheori (GM): I've run out of material.
Should I just go back to making up random crap on the spot?
Frezak (GM): I thought that's what you always did?
Gaurav: Do it!
Apheori (GM): Only sometimes.
Most times.
>.>
Ellemerr: *shrugs* This is the problem you get when you actually run your game. I wish I had it.
Apheori (GM): What do you mean?
Frezak (GM): DONT LOOK AT ME
I WOULD ALSO LIKE THAT PROBLEM
YOU HAG
Ellemerr: I mean I haven't run my game for half a year and am getting more and more material that I'd like to spend, and it just... sits there. Waiting.
I WASN'T LOOKING AT YOU
EGOCENTRIC HOBO
Frezak (GM): brb
hag
Apheori (GM): >.<
Frezak (GM): ADVENTURE?
Gaurav: Adventure!
Ganelon: Adventure?
Seems unlikely.
Frezak (GM): I've given up on progress,at least let me have adventure.
Apheori (GM): Adventures are hard.
You know what?
Next week. Next week maybe I'll have something.
Right now I got nothing.
Ellemerr: I'm gone during the weekend again.
Apheori (GM): Oh, right.
Ellemerr: Last one for a while. Probably. Maybe.
Gaurav: I can't make next Monday or Tuesday. What about next Wednesday?
Bear Soup Guy: Tuesday again?
Ah
Gaurav: Hee
Sorry
Ellemerr: *shrug* Anything but friday-saturday-sunday.
Bear Soup Guy: I should be able to do Wednesday as far as I know
Frezak (GM): We're..... stopping now O.o
Ellemerr topples over.
Ellemerr: Sorry. >.<
Apheori (GM): I'm sorry.
Can I do wednesday?
Gaurav: Yes!
Apheori (GM): Can anyone not do wednesday?
Frezak (GM): This wednesday?
Or the one newt week?
Bear Soup Guy: Newt Week
Even better than Shark Week
Frezak (GM): It's far less dangerous.
FOr training purposes.
Bear Soup Guy: Some newts are poisonous!
Gaurav: I see you've never met a newt by moonlight
Frezak (GM): It's not Newt Licking Week!
Bear Soup Guy: Fair point
Apheori (GM): But not an ill met newt by noonlight either.
Gaurav: Well said.
Frezak (GM): I... think I can do next wednesday but I can't be sure.
Until the actual newty week.
Bear Soup Guy: Newts bring with them a certain clarity
Gaurav: Truth.
Until next week, then?
Frezak (GM): APPARENTLY
Apheori (GM): We'll see the newt, then.
And raise a newt?
Gaurav: NOT in my intestines this time I hope.
Bear Soup Guy: ^
Apheori (GM): Oh, good idea.
Gaurav: Have fun, everybody, and thanks for bringing me back from the dead and stuff.
Apheori (GM): You never actually died, man.
Gaurav: It felt like dying. There was a bright light and everything. But that was my own body.
Bear Soup Guy: "I don't want to go."
Okay bye everyone! See you next week!
Frezak (GM): >.>
Gaurav: Bbye BSG!
Frezak (GM): Goodbye you heroes.
Ellemerr is passed out somewhere.
Apheori (GM) passes out on top of Ellemerr.
Gaurav vanishes in a flurry of eels

Session 31

Apheori (GM): I'm here.
BEGIN SESSION.
Apheori (GM) becomes Dave and runs away.
Ganelon: Radek continues to be soggy and more than a little relieved that someone kidnapped Dave.
Ellemerr: Meanie.
Ganelon: He is cynically confident, however, that Dave will find her way back to him in good time.
Frezak (GM): Dude, I'm glad Dave is gone too.
Apheori (GM): Rhu is passed out and can wake up at any point to discover he can't see anything.
Frezak (GM): I will share that belief.
Gaurav: Rhu is conveniently unconscious so he doesn't have to go running after Dave by himself. Don't split the party and all that.
Frezak (GM): And will carry RHu if he doesn't wake up.
Apheori (GM): The DM shouldn't propose these things, but it would be totally awesome if Radek did some more digging in Rhu. This time his brain.
Gaurav: Huh. That doesn't sound worth getting up for.
Ganelon: Most likely because her kidnapper will soon realize that he's effectively stolen the cursed Aztec gold that will make his life an unending nightmare without sensation.
Whoa, whoa.
Radek is not a brain surgeon.
Apheori (GM): So?
Doesn't he like to experiment?
Frezak (GM): Not with MEATSACKS
Ganelon: Less so on oozy flesh things, yeah.
Apheori (GM): Pfft, fine.
Ganelon: I mean, he'd DO it...
Ellemerr: ... *with a strange glint to her eyes* Amadi could do it...
Ganelon: But not if anyone were to hold him liable for the result.
Apheori (GM): Is anyone attached to Rhu?
Gaurav: judging from the level of technology on this planet, Rhu is as likely to be trepanned as to end up with fanged peas in his eyeballs
if we go see an actual surgeon, I mean
Ganelon: I don't want to hurt his feelings by saying "no".
Frezak (GM): Well he's part of the team.
Apheori (GM): Does Greibel still have some fanged peas?
Frezak (GM): I'm not going to advocate cutting his head to bits for no reason.
Bear Soup Guy: Probably but I think they've gone off by now
Now, alas, they are merely molar peas
Apheori (GM): The better to cannibalise other peas?
Frezak (GM): Now there's only the Alpha Pea left.
Bear Soup Guy: That is an excellent point.
Yes, per Frezak
The lone survivor. Bearded and grizzled.
Gaurav: A bearded pea?
Ellemerr: A bearded fanged pea-
Bear Soup Guy: THE bearded, fanged pea
Gaurav: Yes.
Apheori (GM): It's like Purple Tentacle.
Gaurav: So, leaving Rhu in the pit of we're-not-running-behind-Dave-just-yet, should we head for town?
Frezak (GM): One Pea to rule them all
And in the pocket eat them?
Gaurav: The bearded, fanged, evil-genius pea?
Frezak (GM): Well i'll carry Rhu.
Gaurav: Yay!
Apheori (GM): If you did run after Dave, I would be seriously disappointed.
Rhu dreams of electric sheep
Apheori (GM): Well, letting Rhu do it could be pretty funny.
But the rest of you... you're smarter than that.
Ellemerr: I am? O_o
Apheori (GM): Oddly, yes.
Ganelon: Kidnapping Dave is seriously like stealing cursed Aztec gold.
You're only making things worse on yourself.
It might seem like a great idea at the time, but then you discover that your life has become an unending nightmare without sensation.
Except you can still feel her poking you.
Over. And over. And over.
Gaurav: o.0
Frezak (GM): Is she pokey?
That sounds more like Amadi.
Apheori (GM): They sometimes learn from each other.
Ellemerr: Other times we stop doing things we'd normally do because the other one is doing it and no way am I going to behave like /Dawn/ (and vice versa).
Apheori (GM): XD
Dave might act like you!
But then you'd stop?
Er, anyway.
Everything is nice and peaceful and stinky. Has Gravy burried everything?
Is Rhu in a grave?
Frezak (GM): Aside from the big guy.
I'd have pulled Rhu out before filling that grave.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
You going to bury the big guy?
The Gravedigger: I don't do Ogres.
Apheori (GM): Or are you a wuss?
Wuss.
You'll never progress to houses at this rate.
Frezak (GM): You done?
We allowed to move forwards yet?
Apheori (GM): You may do whatever you please.
Ganelon: The old man is definitely eager to get out of here.
Frezak (GM): Well let's go in the direction indicated by the last guard.
Gaurav: Sounds good to me.
(To Rhu): You should wake up.
Gaurav: Can we get moving please? Hazz' is trying to wake me up. Asshole.
He's going to have to beat a 14 Fort to do it.
Ellemerr: Moving!
Gaurav: Or an 18 Will.
Apheori (GM): Y'all head down the road to town.
It's not very interesting.
I forgot what time of day it is, and so has the world.
Everyone except Rhu roll sanity please.
Gaurav: Yet another advantage to being asleep.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
12
)
=
12
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20
(
6
)
=
6
Apheori (GM): Frezak: I need something that isn't a 1 from you, please.
Ellemerr:
rolling 1d20
(
7
)
=
7
Ganelon: But these are the best rolls to get 1s on.
Gaurav: ^
Is there a doctor in the town?
Or a phone booth?
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20
(
9
)
=
9
One day I will walk through walls again!
Hey, what happened about me digging back for the All-Shovel?
Apheori (GM): Okay.
There's an explosion in the woods somewhere, possibly in the direction Dawn went.
Do you ignore it?
Please tell me you ignore it.
Radek: She's probably fine.
Radek pauses to think for a moment, and then adds to ensure absolute clarity.
Radek: Also, I don't care.
The Gravedigger shrugs.
Amadi yells in the direction of the noise,
Amadi: Dawn, if I have to puzzle you back together I'll kill you! I don't like that kind of patience games!
Amadi grumbles a bit.
Apheori (GM): Well, anyway, you get to the town around midmorning.
It's a bunch of buildings around a road, with some carraiges by some of them, and a weird docking structure that anyone with any eye for engineering would probably figure out is airshi-related.
There's a general store, an inn, a whole lot of random houses and crap scattered around, some sort of pumping station, a bunch of guards arguing over a dead body, and an old lady stuck in a tree.
Gaurav: Pumping station?
We should investigate the old lady in the tree as a possible Dave replacement.
Ganelon: I'll assume the old lady's cat has already called for the authorities to rescue her.
Apheori (GM): It has pumps coming out of the ground. And, like, pipes and stuff.
You look and see the cat sitting under the tree licking its paws.
Ganelon: Cats are treacherous creatures.
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Frezak (GM): Teachery is only when you don't expect it.
Someoen go see if the body is necrotic.
Apheori (GM): Hey, somtimes they cooperate.
Gaurav: I'd like Rhu to remain unconscious until we bed down for the night so he can do the it's-1am-and-I'm-wide-awake thing, but I can wake him up if we need more people running around rolling perception or anything.
Ganelon: If Rhu isn't awake, I guess that leaves me to check for evidence of zombification, huh?
Apheori (GM): ROLL TO WAKE UP.
Gaurav:
rolling d20
(
6
)
=
6
Apheori (GM): Hmph.
Gaurav: Hooray!
Apheori (GM): Radek: All on you.
Or Greibel.
GREIBEL! DO SOMETHING AWESOME.
That may or may not have anything to do with any current situation.
Ganelon: Uh...
What skill is that? Heal?
Apheori (GM): Or you could just smell it.
Well, yes.
Ganelon: Zombies smell different from inanimate corpses?
rolling 1d20+9
(
17
)
+9
=
26
Gaurav: If you sniff at it and it goes "do you mind", it might be undead.
Apheori (GM): I guess 'heal' would be how you know if they smell different or not.
IT IS...
Yes.
It's an undead girl.
Bear Soup Guy: Sorry was away for a second
Apheori (GM): Probably a teenager. Looks like she turned, got shot, died.
Bear Soup Guy: Does the officer investigating the corpse mind that Radek is just prodding at it now?
Apheori (GM): Does he prod it?
Bear Soup Guy: Well that's a good question too
Ganelon: Nah, he'll just stare and stroke his beard wisely.
Frezak (GM): What's the argument about, while he's there?
Apheori (GM): Actually, the officer takes one look at Radek and says, "It's about time. What is it?"
Ganelon: But mostly to get the water out.
Apheori (GM): The others all stop arguing and stare at Radek in anticipation.
Frezak (GM): Gravy will sort of generally plod behind Radek unless I say anything different.
Ellemerr: This is awesome.
Apheori (GM): One of the guards asks Radek, pointing to Gravy, "Um, who's he?" Another jokes that it's clearly his assistent, you dumbarse.
Radek: This girl was undead for a time, yes?
Frezak (GM): I'll just look at them gravely.
Apheori (GM): But not like a graveling.
Frezak (GM): (Pensive Minotaur again, Gan!)
Ganelon: On it.
http://www.artofmtg.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/04/Pensive-Minotaur-Art.jpg
Ellemerr: You are a pretty good secretary. I just thought I should let you know.
Ganelon: Thank you.
Apheori (GM): The leader of the guards asks, "She took sick. How could she become an undead without... well, dying?"
Frezak (GM): You can tell he's the leader because his hat is bigger.
Radek: Simple. Her sickness killed her.
Frezak (GM): MINDS BLOWN
BRAINS EVERYWHERE
Radek: Really now, is that what you were arguing over?
Frezak (GM): "Oh, you bumpkins!!"
Ganelon: One of these days, I'm going to roll a skill check to blow someone's mind.
Frezak (GM): I could.... blow air really hard in someone's ear?
That's the best I'd get.
Apheori (GM): Another is like, "I'm telling you, that's what's happening! It's been spreading out of the..." but the leader guy cuts him off to say something important.
Ganelon: Something more important than that?
Apheori (GM): He thinks it is.
It's something like, "What about Gerard, is that what happened to him?"
That minotaur is adorable.
He's looking at the leg like WHAT IS THIS?
Ganelon: Not "what", madame.
"Why" is this.
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Apheori (GM): Why could be part of what.
I mean, the entire universe is a whole lot of whats. The whys fit in and add more whats.
Gaurav: Any updates on the cat/old lady/tree situation?
Apheori (GM): Does Radek say anything, or let the guards play out their whatever it is?
Radek: I have reason to believe this sickness is infectious. You would do well to quarantine the body and those who begin to show symptoms.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: The old woman in the tree is staring at you.
Ganelon: Get a briefing on the situation from her cat.
You can speak cat.
Guard: You don't mean... Gerald is going to do this?
Amadi waves enthusiastically at the old woman.
Another guard: What have I been trying to tell you people?!
Radek almost makes an effort to sound like he cares in the interests of drama, but fails.
Radek: I'm afraid so.
Greibel looks up at the old woman
Amadi looks down at the cat.
Apheori (GM): The other guard is starting to get very exasperated with the others, but thanks Radek for backing him up since it's about time SOMEONE grasped the blatantly obvious.
The leader guard guy tells him he should go home now.
One of the other guards mentions something about checking on Gerald and scuttles off.
The one who thanked Radek glares at the leader guy and mutters something about incompetent big city wannabes.
Gaurav: Poor Gerald.
Radek points at the dissenting guard with one hand while using the other to continue stroking his beard.
Radek: You... seem more sensible than the rest.
Ganelon: Or at least more cynical, which is always a good thing in his books.
Guard: You mean because I'm not a complete moron?
Apheori (GM): The lead guard yells at him that he's dismissed and needs to go home NOW.
Frezak (GM): I will tun my soulful gaze on the lead guard.
Gaurav: Can we rename him to "Ex-guard" now?
The one who was fired, not the one about the face the full wrath of Gravy
Apheori (GM): The dissenting guard tells him to fuck off, he's not even his boss.
The not his boss says something about sending paperwork to the other's superiors.
There's a remaining other guard and that sone tries to stop all this by pointing out that we kind of have bigger issues right now that paperwork, but get ignored.
he gets*
Radek: An intelligent man surrounded by morons? Oh yes, I understand all too well.
Greibel plods over to the tree with the cat and the woman
Apheori (GM): You hear shots from one of the buildings.
Greibel: Excuse me, do you need help?
Radek: The one problem that even *my* genius has never been able to solve.
Amadi meows.
Old lady: Help?
Son, what do you take me for, some frivolous little damsel?
Frezak (GM): Just shots or shots and voices?
Greibel: I think you mean "frail" but no, I just meant it looks like you're stuck in a tree.
Apheori (GM): The other guard and the captain or whatever he is run to the building the shots came from. No accompanying voices.
Old lady: Oh, well, really I'm stuck in a cat. Be a dear and move it for me, will you?
Frezak (GM): I'll look at Radek.
Apheori (GM): The intelligent guard sighs and doesn't do anything either.
Amadi: The cat says hi.
The Gravedigger: So, do you need this body buried?
Amadi does more elaborate meowing.
Apheori (GM): The cat shrugs and says something about chickens.
Frezak (GM): is Amadi trying to say anything in cat or just making meow noises? :p
Apheori (GM): The guard asks Radek if that will stop it from spreading.
Greibel: Hmmmph...
Ganelon: This isn't something Radek actually knows, is it?
Greibel: Hey there kitty...kitty kitty...
rolling 1d20+13 nature
(
9
)
+13
=
22
Gaurav: Vague cats are the worst.
Apheori (GM): Gan: Nope. You can do a heal check to maybe find out, though. Or possibly arcana? Which would make sense?
Ganelon: I'll stick with heal. Arcana does not encompass ALL SCIENCE, after all.
Kitty: Hey.
Ganelon: Medical science in particular has nothing to do with Arcana.
rolling 1d20+9
(
16
)
+9
=
25
Greibel: Hey. What's the deal with this tree and stuff?
Apheori (GM): But zombie science... well, I dunno.
Gan: It might spread into the ground, but it seems the zombieness goes away after awhile once dead dead, so it's probably as good a way to stop it as any.
Certainly better than BURNING them, since that would just put it in the atmosphere.
Radek glances back at Gravy.
Radek: You're going to like this.
Bear Soup Guy: brb bathroom
Radek: The best way to curb this infection... is to bury the dead. Preferably in an area without much vegetation.
Kitty: There seems to be a lady stuck in it. It's quite interesting.
Old lady: Oy, move that cat so I can get down already!
The Gravedigger poses.
The Gravedigger: This I can do!
Ellemerr: *giggles*
Radek: Don't make the mistake of burning them, and don't allow the infected to interact with healthy individuals.
The Gravedigger: Direct me to a greaveable area and you will witness the ART of the GRAVEDIGGER
Radek: Maybe I'll work on a cure if I have the time.
The Gravedigger: BURN THEM?
BURN THEM????
BARBARIAN.
Ahem.
If you would, Mr. Guard?
Radek: (To the guard) He's all yours. Don't worry, he's the most tolerable moron I know.
Frezak (GM): Aw, man.
That hurts.
Ganelon: Backhanded compliments are the only kind I can deliver.
Frezak (GM): He has 12 Int!
he's a genius!
Ganelon: When you have 20 int, everyone looks like a moron.
Apheori (GM): He has the lowest INT of anyone in the party.
Ganelon: ...Really?
Apheori (GM): Since DAve is gone, yes.
Ganelon: Rhu certainly acts like he has less than 12.
Gaurav: Despit having 14, yes.
Frezak (GM): It's still higher than the average person.
Apheori (GM): Amadi has 16, but using it is optional.
Average includes lesser races.
Gaurav: Does it include fanged peas?
Apheori (GM): Anyway, the guard guy says he's not sure since this isn't his town, but there should be a graveyard over thatwaysish.
He directs Gravy thatwayish.
Which actually is specific when he says it.
Frezak (GM): I twiddle a horn and use Gravyvision to detect the graveyard.
rolling 1D20+20
(
13
)
+20
=
33
Eyes turn into headlights.
Apheori (GM): The graveyard is thatwayish, and is indeed about what you wanted.
The Gravedigger: Now! Where are your corpses?
Guard: There's probably another one inside.
Ganelon: "We've only got the one-"
"There's been a murder!"
"...The two?"
"Double homicide!"
"The three."
Guard: May be a few more if they go fondling the corpses like they so wanted to with this one.
Idiots!
Frezak (GM): "All killed by shovels, somehow."
The Gravedigger: On it!
GRAAAAAVES
Frezak (GM): Charges to the building.
Guard directs Gravy to the building the other guards went in. It sounds quiet.
Apheori (GM): You charge in?
Frezak (GM): I charge /to/ and then politely knock on the door.
Greibel: (To the cat) She seems to think you're keeping her from getting down.
Frezak (GM): I am imaginging him exploding through the door and screaming GRAAAAVES as splinters rain down.
But he's not doing that.
Apheori (GM): Gravy: You get no response.
So you can still explode through if you want.
Well, justifiably.
Easily justifiably.
Maybe.
Depending on who you're justifying it again.
Apheori (GM): Well, at, I mean.
Kitty: Who, me? I'm just a concerned citizen.
Just like the whole chicken debacle all over again...
Kitty mutters incoherently.
Amadi giggles in Kitty. Which might sound sort of like purring with hiccups.
Old lady: What is that damned rat telling you now?
Frezak (GM): I'll knock powerfully.
Old lady: Move it already!
Frezak (GM): And if I still get no response, go look and see who of the party is nearby.
Or at least no busy.
Which is... Radek?
Apheori (GM): The guard goes and opens the door, pokes his head inside, and loudly asks if anyone is alive.
The voice of the lead guard yells at him to go away.
Greibel: (To the cat) Do you mind if I move you? She might starve if she just stubbornly sits up there yelling at the world for too long.
Kitty: Yes.
Greibel: Yes you mind?
Kitty: Yes.
Greibel: Okay then.
Amadi: [in Cat] Yes.
Greibel: Will you at least keep an eye on her?
Kitty giggles.
Greibel looks at Amadi inquisitively.
Greibel looks at Amadi and points vaguely up into the tree
Kitty: Radek is the closest conscious one.
Apheori (GM): Er, ooc.
Amadi grins cheshirely.
Ganelon: Radek looks like he doesn't want to solve any more domestic crimes today.
But he's watching for lack of anything better to do.
The Gravedigger: 'scuse me! Just need any bodies you have up there!
Gaurav: Bring out your dead!
Amadi fades away even more cheshirely, leaving the grin for last, and reappears in the tree some time later.
Frezak (GM): "And if you don't give them I will fucking take them and/or make some!"
Kitty purrs at Griebel.
Apheori (GM): Gravy: There's a grumbling and someone asking if this is really necessary and then he yells that they're all in the room by the kitchen.
Frezak (GM): I will move in to acquire them.
Apheori (GM): The guard with you suggests that Radek follow him and try to check covertly if anyone is infected, because if so this could get messy, and heads in too.
Gaurav: Is Gravy still carrying Rhu?
Frezak (GM): Yes.
Unless Rhu moved.
You're over a shoulder.
Greibel looks, slightly distressed, at the tree
Gaurav: Nope. Still as stone. Awesome, thanks!
Apheori (GM): Gravy: You and the guard wind up in a room with two dead bodies, a dormant zombie, and three possibly infected guards, including the captain.
Who is incredibly irate at this point.
Frezak (GM): Dormant?
Apheori (GM): It's not moving and looks dead, but you have gravyvision.
YOU CAN'T BURY IT LIKE THIS.
Or maybe you can, I dunno.
But it also don't have charred holes in it.
Unlike the others.
Gaurav: I suppose there's no reason to tell them about the other captain we met/fought an ogre with/lost a godling to?
Ganelon: Radek will grumpily follow because this could escalate into a major inconvenience for him if he doesn't fix it all now.
The Gravedigger: 'scuse me.
Apheori (GM): Radek winds up in the room too.
The Gravedigger: That one's a zombie.
Not a corpse.
Mind if I...
Apheori (GM): The guard leader captain guy yells at Radek to explain what the hell is going on.
The Gravedigger: *waves shovel*
Apheori (GM): Your guard mutters something about how a nice shovel hit could resolve so many problems.
Old lady yells at Greibel to move that damn cat.
Greibel looks back and forth from the lady to Amadi to the cat
Apheori (GM): The leader guard guy apologises and says it's been a long day. Could you look at these too?
Gaurav: Our guard needs a name. Entirely too many guards.
Kitty grins at Amadi.
Radek: Gravy is a qualified professional.
Greibel: I'm sorry. Last time I went against a cat's wishes there was a battle with Gods and spells and fire and then the cat might have cursed everyone.
He seems to like staying where he is.
Ganelon: (Not specifying what he's a professional of)
Greibel: Why is he keeping you from getting down?
Radek: He can resolve nearly any issue with a sufficient mortality rate.
Old lady: That's... personal!
Amadi purrs and rubs herself against the old lady.
The Gravedigger: I'm going to need to smack this one before it stands up.
Old lady: Just move him, will you?
Gaurav: 1. Is there an issue? 2. Kill someone. 3. Go to #1.
Greibel shakes his head
Greibel: Amadi, what do you think?
Frezak (GM): That's a lovely problem-solving technique that I approve of.
Apheori (GM): The guard captain guy says something about not making a mess.
The guard with you just shoots it instead.
It starts to wake up so he shoots it again, this time in the head.
And it like stops and stuff.
The Gravedigger: That works too.
I'll just leave this guy outside.
Frezak (GM): He props Rhu outside.
Radek: (To the guards) Are any of you infected?
Frezak (GM): Since he's not goingt o bundle him with the corpses.
Amadi tells the kitty to give her a good reason to not move it.
Kitty says something about horrible curses and bad luck and no, there really isn't a good reason unless you like mildly inconveniencing random people for the hell of it.
Apheori (GM): The guards look at Radek like he's insane.
The guard captain guy says of course they aren't.
Amadi laughs.
Amadi: (in cat, of course.)
Frezak (GM): back in a bit
Radek: Let me see your eyes.
Apheori (GM): The guard with you mentions that it's not even worth checking, why would anyone bring it up, and then the guard captain is suddenly a lot less resistent to being checked.
Radek: The captain's eyes are fine. One of the other guards is fine. The last one isn't.
Or is he?
Roll.
Radek:
rolling 1d20+9
(
2
)
+9
=
11
Ganelon: Uh oooooh
Apheori (GM): He's not fine.
Amadi: (to Greibel, still in cat) Do you want me to move the cat? I think it has good enough reasons, and the lady is too loud and obnoxious, but I can move it if you want. I almost promise that I can guarantee no bad things happening to you because of it, too!
Radek makes a long series of "hmms" and troubled shakes of the head as he inspects the guardsmen.
Radek: I'm sorry to say that all three of you are idiots who depend on the guidance of strangers to solve problems you should be qualified to handle yourselves.
Greibel: Do you think he'll just move on his own eventually? That would be nice for everyone.
Radek points and the last guard.
Radek: Also, /you/ are going to turn into a zombie and you need to be quarantined.
Bear Soup Guy: You tell 'em, Radek!
Frezak (GM): yeah!
Gravy will look imposing.
And go 'hmmm' sagely.
Guard: Strangers? Aren't you the forensics guy?
Amadi: Er...
Gaurav: God, Radek is awesome.
Ganelon: Aw shit, do I not have sunglasses to put on?
I can't be a CSI without sunglasses.
Apheori (GM): The guard you pointed at tries to run away.
Old lady: Pleaaaase move that cat?
Gaurav: Maybe we can get the old lady out of the tree some other way.
Amadi: Aaaw, see, that's sweet!
... Will you reward us? I want a lollipop.
Greibel: I want a fudge pop!
Old lady: Of course!
Just moe that cat.
Radek: Gravy, after that moron!
Greibel: (To Amadi) Well, I think we know what we have to do.
Ganelon: Okay, let's do a bluff.
I'm not skilled at those but maybe I'll get lucky.
Amadi giggles, and promptly falls out of the tree, aiming for the cat.
Frezak (GM): GRAVY TACKLE
I charge him.
Apheori (GM): Roll to use yourself to move the cat.
Roll to grab the fleeing guard.
Frezak (GM): I'm not grabbing;
I'm just knocking him down.
rolling 1D20+12
(
13
)
+12
=
25
Vs Guard AC
Radek:
rolling 1d20+2 Bluff
(
8
)
+2
=
10
Yes, I am the "forensics guy".
Ganelon: I think Radek's only skill at bluffing is the use of sarcasm.
Amadi:
rolling 1d20
(
6
)
=
6
Ellemerr: (Dunno what to put on that.)
(I do have 9 acrobatics.)
Apheori (GM): Okay, Gravy knocks the fleeing guard down, Amadi flops next to the cat knocking it slightly to the side, the guards inside seem to buy Radek's claim or at least don't argue, and one starts to say something else, and then there is a horrible explosion as the old lady is freed from the tree.
It rocks the whole town, the sky goes dark, and you hear a horrible laughter fading into the distance.
Then the old lady is gone.
Greibel: I knew it!
The Gravedigger: Is that normal?
Greibel: I knew something bad would happen!
Frezak (GM): To the guard under him.
Apheori (GM): The cat says something about how the world is doomed, and wonders where it might find some fish.
The guard struggles but doesn't actually answer.
The sky fades back to normal after a little bit.
The guard leader guy asks what the hell that was.
The guard with you guys, whose name is George, sighs.
The Gravedigger: You promise to not run again if I get up?
Amadi: HEY! WHAT ABOUT MY LOLLIPOP!
Amadi looks angry in a scary way.
Greibel shakes a fist at the sky
Greibel: You'll pay for not delivering that lollipop!
The Gravedigger 's ears twitch. IS THERE JUSTICE TO BE DISPENSED?
Gaurav: yay George!
Apheori (GM): The guard Gravy is on freaks out and tries to get away again.
Kitty: She lied, what.
Ganelon: Can I uh...
Try to understand this phenomenon?
Is it magical?
Amadi: I! DEMAND! MY LOLLIPOP!
Frezak (GM): I remain where I am, then.
The Gravedigger: If you wriggle someone is going to decide it's less effort to shoot you.
Amadi tries accessing whatever scary powers she has to get her lollipop from the "old lady".
Apheori (GM): Gan: There was a flash of magic, yes.
(From Amadi): Just to be clear, I don't know the old lady, do I?
(To Amadi): She doesn't seem to be anyone in particular, no. Just some random hag who's gone off the deep end and wants to destroy the world.
Apheori (GM): Amadi: D20.
Amadi:
rolling 1d20
(
4
)
=
4
Apheori (GM): Gravy: He stops trying to struggle.
Amadi: Nothing really happens. You get a sense of where she is, though. You could go there, if you could just... go there.
Maybe you could take Greibel.
Amadi gives Greibel a calculating look.
The Gravedigger: Raaaadeeeek!
What do I do with this guy?
Greibel gives Amadi a look that doesn't know what's happening
Apheori (GM): The guard leader guy and his other guard go back outside.
Amadi grabs Greibel's hand, and with eyes craving revenge, sets after the old lady.
Radek: Where do you detain people in this town?
Amadi: (revenge - and, mostly, lollipops. Someone should've told her she has one in her pocket.)
Radek: I assume you have nothing as sophisticated as a chair with restraints.
Greibel tags along dutifully
Apheori (GM): George says they probably have some cells in the basement and points to some stairs.
Greibel and Amadi: Suddenly you are somewhere else.
Amadi looks around for the old lady.
Apheori (GM): You don't find the old lady. You do, however, find Dave.
Greibel: Hi Dave!
Frezak (GM): Crud!
Run!
Apheori (GM): You're at the top of a tall tower, at the apex massive evil fortress. Monstrous guard beasts patrol far below.
Dave says hi and asks where the target went.
Amadi: Dawn! I'm here on Lokshmi business! Have you seen someone who owes me a lollipop?
Ganelon: Well then.
Frezak (GM): HAH
That's pretty serious business.
Apheori (GM): Dawn looks confused and shakes her head, and then you realise there's another fragment behind her. Except this one is just staring over the edge of the tower in amazement, and not really saying anything.
Ellemerr: Another FRAGMENT fragment?
Do I recognize her?
Apheori (GM): Aye. This one is a really short attention span, and generally responds to 'squirrel'.
Ellemerr: Oh dear.
Amadi: Squirrel!
(From Amadi): Why can I control George? xD Should I be doing anything with that?
(To Ellemerr): Oh, oops.
Ganelon: Shorter than these two?
Ellemerr: Hey, I've managed to follow Greibel ALL THIS TIME.
(To Ellemerr): do you want Squirrel?
Ellemerr: I think I'm pretty good.
(From Ellemerr): That is really up to you. I probably could. :P
(From Ellemerr): At least if it's only temporary.
(To Ellemerr): Eh, she'll be available. Even if we both do her at the same time it should be fine.
Squirrel turns around.
Squirrel: Squirrel!
Ganelon: Greibel is a source of limitless entertainment.
You can't get bored hanging around him.
Ellemerr: True. :3
Frezak (GM): Because of the Drug Haze.
Amadi: Lollipop?
Ganelon: Unless he's taking some depressants, I suppose. But then, he'd probably offer you.
Offer some to you, rather.
Frezak (GM): "He'd offer you to the Drug Gods"
Bear Soup Guy: The Drug Gods are super chill, man
And they have an infinite bag of Doritos
Frezak (GM): That's pretty sweet.
Should go dethrone them and take it.
Bear Soup Guy: That would be easy to do seeing as they're stoned all the time and don't really care much about worldly possessions
Squirrel: Lollipop!
Bear Soup Guy: But the infinite bag is infinitely heavy!
Frezak (GM): That's a terrible bag!
Bear Soup Guy: Actually I guess that makes it a black hole
Dave: She's.. here. Somewhere.
Amadi: Great! You're hired! Lokshmi bless us all! STAY OUT OF MY HEAD, THOUGH!
(The latter shouted at nobody in particular.)
Squirrel: Head.
Amadi: She is. We'll find her. And then... then!
Amadi rubs her hands and cackles.
Dave: Yes.
Greibel: Your hair is lovely, Squirrel
Squirrel beams and bounces happily.
Frezak (GM): "I'm sure it tastes delicious"
Greibel: (quietly) mmmm.....spaghetti.....
Amadi goes in pursuit of her VENGEANCE! Somehow.
Apheori (GM): Amadi takes Greibel and suddenly you're somewhere else.
Ŕoll a d20.
Bear Soup Guy: Who rolls?
Apheori (GM): Amadi, sorry.
Bear Soup Guy: s'alright
Amadi:
rolling 1d20
(
8
)
=
8
Ellemerr: >.>
Apheori (GM): Greibel: d20.
Frezak, Gan: You waiting for these guys to sort their thing out before continuing?
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20
(
10
)
=
10
Apheori (GM): Amadi and Greibel: You find yourselves in a bedroom. It's a rather fancy bedroom with a messy bed in the middle. There's some strange black stuff on the walls, though.
A moment later Dawn and Squirrel appear and Dawn seems to be trying to restrain Squirrel.
Squirrel is trying to braid Dave's hair.
Dave pushes Squirrel onto the bed.
Dave: Not here. Further in. In her place of power...
Squirrel sprawls on the bed and then burrows into the covers.
Amadi: Well, YOU get us there, if you know it so well!
Bear Soup Guy: You guys must be quite the character when you're not fragmented...
Amadi seems frustrated. And still very angry.
Ellemerr: Oh, quite.
Ganelon: Frezak, Gan: You waiting for these guys to sort their thing out before continuing?
Yeah, basically.
Other things are also distracting me.
For which I apologize.
Squirrel: They should be done soon.
Ellemerr: I... should stop soon, though. For which I'm very sorry. But when I do, you can go on with the other group! (Sorry BSG.)
Squirrel: Wheeeeeheheheheeee.
Bear Soup Guy: No worries!
Squirrel draws squiggly things on the ceiling by pointing at it and causing burn marks to appear.
Dave grabs Greibel and Amadi and takes them all somewhere else.
Amadi: All done! Impaled! Burnt so sweet, so sweet!
Dave:
rolling 1d20
(
13
)
=
13
Amadi attempts grabbing Squirrel in the last second.
Apheori (GM): Greibel, Amadi, and Dave are now in a throne room of sorts. You are surrounded by guard things everywhere. They all point weapons at you.
In front of you, on the throne, is the old lady, looking very prim and proper and a bit upset at the fuss.
(You missed grabbing squirrel.)
Greibel eyes the guards and begins conjuring smalls vines in his hands should a conflict erupt
Apheori (GM): Have we lost Ellemerr?\
Ellemerr: Not quite yet.
I'm juggling. Not geese, this time.
Apheori (GM): What does Amadi do?
Amadi sets her incredibly angry eyes in the old lady, trying to look as much like Dave as possible. (Yes, Dave, not Dawn. Though this probably does include Dawn, too.)
Amadi: You! How DARE you! You USED me! ME!
Old lady laughs.
Old lady: Why not? You think you can defy me?
Squirrel suddenly appears and starts bouncing through the guards, cackling shrilly and doing random things to them and blowing them up and taking her own arm off and beating a bunch of them up with it.
Gaurav: Ooo-kay
Amadi: Well, I know one of us is going to end up with a lollipop and - hah! BEHOLD!
The wrath of Lokshmi is upon you!
Squirrel: LOOOOKSHMIIIIII!
Amadi: ... Or my wrath. Or HERS. It doesn't really matter that much.
Squirrel: LOOOKY LOOKY SHMEEEE.
Greibel stops conjuring vines to watch curiously
Dawn walks up to the old lady. Some guards try to stop her and they fall over dead.
Dawn: You. You have whatever the worded against us. You will whatever the word is.
Um.
Dawn looks back at Amadi, then focuses a horrible glare at the woman.
Dawn: Yes.
Amadi: LOLLIPOP!
Dawn: Lollipop.
Greibel: And a fudgsicle if it's not too much trouble!
Old lady starts to look a bit concerned and then starts to do some magic and suddenly falls asleep instead.
Apheori (GM): All the weird guard things collapse.
Amadi grins maliciously.
Amadi: Sweet... nightmares.
Dawn: Yeah, um, that's what we meant to do.
Amadi starts rummaging through the lady's pockets for sweets.
Dawn gestures vaguely, looks really confused, and then picks up Squirrel and hands her to Greibel.
Ganelon: Remind me to never inconvenience this one when I become a villainous mastermind.
Greibel: Oh, hello.
Squirrel makes airplane noises.
Ellemerr: Well, she's pretty easy to pacify if you have lollipops.
Gaurav: o.0
Dawn gives Amadi a lollipop, and Greibel a fudgsicle, and then looks curiously around.
Dawn: How'd we wind up here?
Amadi jumps up and down and hugs Dawn and says "thank you!" and everything.
Greibel unwraps the fudgsicle excitedly
Greibel: Teleportation!
Magic!
Dawn: It's just that... I was somewhere else.
Apheori (GM): Greibel, Amadi: Can you getback to the others now?
Amadi: Oh, so were we.
How did the kidnapping go?
Dawn: He exploded.
Greibel: Hah!
Amadi: Had it coming.
Dawn: I ate a bear.
Bear Soup Guy: Apheori: Can we? You're the DM :P
Amadi: Was it good?
Greibel: Did you cook it?
In a soup, perhaps?
Amadi: Mmmm, bear soup.
Apheori (GM): Well, yes, but you know. Party.
Dawn: How did you know?
Squirrel curls around Greibel's feet and starts sinking into the floor.
Greibel: I feel like I have experience with bear soup. Hmmm. Odd, that. Maybe a past life leaking through this messed up time and space.
Amadi shrugs.
Greibel: Oop!
Greibel looks down
Amadi: Stranger things happen. Pretty much daily.
Greibel: Your friend is cute.
Amadi: I know! That hair. I'm almost jealous.
Amadi licks her lollipop happily.
Amadi: Well - should we go back? See how badly the others have messed up?
I mean, without us around to keep things sorted...
Amadi grins. Her tongue is coloured candy blue.
Ellemerr: And that's sort of it from me.
Greibel: That's a good idea.
Ellemerr: But please find out what the others have done meanwhile, and feel free to go on further, too.
Bear Soup Guy: Take care, Merr! It was lovely causing mischief with you today.
Squirrel bounces up and embraces Amadi and they suddenly both disappear.
Apheori (GM): Okay, back to Dorgin.
Radek, Gravy: You have a quiet, no longer struggling apparently infected guy, the cells are downstairs, and stuff.
What do you do?
Frezak (GM): I suppose I'm taking my guy to the cells?
Ganelon: Yeah, gotta lock this guy up before he becomes a zombie.
Apheori (GM): You lock him in a cell. There's nobody else down here.
Frezak (GM): Awright.
I'll check that Rhu is alive.
Apheori (GM): He pleads with you that he's not infected.
The guy in the cell, I mean.
Frezak (GM): And then go bury these corpses.
Radek: Well then, you won't have much to worry about when you fail to show advancing symptoms over the next few days, will you?
You know, it's selfish behavior which leads us to this sort of pandemic.
Guard: But... you...
You can't lock me in here!
Apheori (GM): Rhu: WAKE UP ALREADY.
Radek laughs.
Radek: Well, I have to disagree with you there.
Gaurav:
rolling d20
(
17
)
=
17
Frezak (GM): Radek is such a terrible person.
THumbs up, gan!
Apheori (GM): Rhu wakes up and starts screaming.
Rhu: He's the best for speeches, though.
Gaurav: err ooc
Rhu starts screaming.
Frezak (GM): No, Rhu is talking in his sleep
Oh.
He could do that too.
Gaurav: Why am I screaming?
Frezak (GM): Must be bad if even you don't know.
Apheori (GM): Gravy's got all the bodies outside. The guard and the leader guard are under the tree arguing again.
You have a bug in your nose.
Roll to get the bug out of your nose
.
Gaurav continues screaming
Gaurav:
rolling d20
(
14
)
=
14
Er ic
Apheori (GM): Rhu gets the bug out of his nose and realises he can't see.
Rhu abrupts stops screaming
Rhu: ... huh.
Rhu blinks furiously
Apheori (GM): The guard with the leader guard takes a bite out of the leader guard.
Frezak (GM): I charge.
Rhu:
rolling d20+12 heal check to figure out what's wrong ... I suppose I start with the basics (can I hear? Is there something in front of my eyes?) and see how far my knowledge of medicine gets me.
(
14
)
+12
=
26
Apheori (GM): At whom?
Frezak (GM): The biter.
Apheori (GM): Or what?
Okay.
What do you do with him?
Rhu: HULLO? Is someone here? I hear chewing!
Frezak (GM): I just bodyslam him gravystyle.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You seem to be blind. You hear a Gravy charge.
Frezak (GM): In order to deter future biting.
Of course every time he charges he shouts.
Gaurav: No biting! Bad guard!
The Gravedigger: GRAAAAAAAAAVES
Apheori (GM): The leader guard screams and is sent flying. The biter seems to be turning into a zombie.
Rhu rolls out of the way at the shout
Frezak (GM): I begin to beat the shit out of the biter.
Rhu feels around for anything: a tree, a post, a wall
Apheori (GM): The biter bites at you.
Ganelon: Would Radek hear this commotion?
Because he has to fix every bloody problem and this is clearly the start of a new one.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You're by a wall. It feels rough but painted. There's a breeze and you feel warmth, probably sunlight.
Gaurav: I don't suppose Rhu's maul was left anywhere near him?
Rhu stands up and leans against the wall, listening to see if he can figure out what the consequences of the Gravycharge was
Apheori (GM): Unless Radek stayed with the guy in the cell, you and George probably came up too.
Rhu: You hear biting and punches.
Frezak (GM): Punches?
He should hear
Rhu stays very, very quiet
Frezak (GM): "rawr"
"Blonnnng"
Apheori (GM): Shovel punches.
Frezak (GM): Also a lot of grave-related shouting.
Bear Soup Guy: "Shovel punch" should really be an official D&D move
Gaurav: That's reassuring, as it suggests that Gravy is winning. But Rhu is stay quiet in case there's other baddies around.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 + 2 vs gravy reflex
(
20
)
+2
=
22
Does it get you?
Frezak (GM): Yes.
Apheori (GM): Buggrit.
Frezak (GM): It'd get anyone.
Apheori (GM): Okay, the turning guard zombie takes a bite out of you, though you shovel it to death.
Gaurav: That is a damn fine roll.
Apheori (GM): It does a whopping 4 damage.
And hurts like something took a bite out of you.
Frezak (GM): Amazing.
Apheori (GM): I know, right?
Frezak (GM): I only have 59 HP left!
WHAT WILL I DO?
Apheori (GM): Panic.
I dunno.
Leader guard guy is backing away trying to cover a massively bleeding neck.
Radek, where are you?
Frezak (GM): You know what.
We should just leave;
Take smart guard with us.
And go request an Exterminatus.
Apheori (GM): What's that?
Frezak (GM): W40K reference.
Orbital planet-razing.
Apheori (GM): Ah.
Amadi might have something stored away for that.
Frezak (GM): Otherwise, might as well just leave.
Unless we want to take on a zombie epidemic.
Gaurav: ^
Radek approaches the NEW crime scene, grumbling and cursing the whole way over.
Rhu: Radek?
Radek: Every bloody time I get something done...
The Gravedigger: Also I have a hole.
I hope my shots will deal with it.
George suddenly shoots the leader guard.
Radek: Good job, George.
George: I think it's just about wrapped up.
Ganelon: I could make a great dictator.
The Gravedigger: How do you know that other people aren't infected?
George: They actually did get the civilians to stay inside, so... yeah! Maybe they can get som real guards here now! Wouldn't cound on it, though.
The Gravedigger: Real guards?
They were a militia or something?
Rhu: Guys?
Apheori (GM): Greibel: Would you like to do anything while you're in that place, or should Dave try to transport you back to the others?
George: No, they just sucked.
Frezak (GM): Didn't Rhu hear the fighting outside?
Ganelon: I'd like to check Gravy.
Gaurav: Rhu is outside. He's standing against the wall. I assume he's close enough to listen to you, although maybe he's on another side of the building or something.
Ganelon: For signs of imminent zombification.
Frezak (GM): Oh, right, sorry.
The Gravedigger: Hey, Rhu!
Zombies!
Apheori (GM): Heal on Gravy?
Gaurav: Er. Yes. Well. See. The thing is. I've gone blind.
Rhu: Er. Yes. Well. See. The thing is. I've gone blind.
The Gravedigger: Oh.
Is this some god thing?
Rhu waves vaguely at his face
The Gravedigger: Dead End Eyeballs?
Apheori (GM): "We don't need you anymore. *SHOVEL*"
Rhu: What?! No! Why would Hazz'ridan All-Merciful take away my eyesight?
Ganelon: Heal on Gravy.
rolling 1d20+9
(
7
)
+9
=
16
The Gravedigger: Fucked if I know.
Bear Soup Guy: Apheori: Your call. I need to bandage a cat leg soon soon so I might go MIA for a bit.
Apheori (GM): Radek: Gravy seems fine.
Rhu: It must be ... what happened back at the farmhouse
And where are we now?
Radek: You're fine.
Ganelon: Heal on Rhu.
Frezak (GM): I have great Endurance.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+9
(
10
)
+9
=
19
Bear Soup Guy: "He wants you to walk into dead ends"
Frezak (GM): HAH
Gaurav: BSG: XD
BSG: Why bandage a cat leg?
Apheori (GM): Rhu doesn't seem to have anything actually wrong with him. The eyes do what eyes do. Just don't see.
Bear Soup Guy: My cat has a bleeding tumor thing :(
Apheori (GM): Eek.
Gaurav: oh no :( sorry to hear that
Bear Soup Guy: Yeah.
Apheori (GM): Well, until then...
Bear Soup Guy: He doesn't seem to care about it, but it does make a mess so we bandage it up.
Radek: You're /also/ fine, on the outside.
Probably brain damage.
Apheori (GM): GREIBEL: YOU ARE A FUNDAMENTAL ASS SATELLITE OF SPACE.
Bear Soup Guy: XD XD XD XD XD
Apheori (GM): Also you come flying out of the sky at an impossible speed and impact he ground in front of Radek.
Rhu doesn't respond. Only after a good 15 minutes of silence does he realise that Radek might have been talking to him.
Apheori (GM): You're fine. You can get up in whatever fashion you like.
Rhu: 15 seconds*
Apheori (GM): But you are on fire.
Frezak (GM): brb
Greibel crashes
Rhu: Oh! Well. I hope it isn't ---
Rhu falls over with the impact of a landing Greibel
Greibel lifts his head up
Radek jumps back, clutching his beard protectively.
Greibel: Well....
I'm here now, bitches!
Greibel coughs out some dirt
Radek: You lunatics are /inescapable/.
Rhu: Is that Greibel?
Apheori (GM): Poor Radek.
Greibel: It sure is, buddy!
Don
't worry, Dave's fine. I saw her on a tower and she kicked some ass.
Rhu: Oh. Nice.
I'm blind now.
I think it's temporary?
Um.
Radek: Not for the faithful, it isn't.
Ganelon: Yes, that was a RELIGION BURN.
Rhu ignores that
Bear Soup Guy: Roll for sick burn
Gaurav laughs
Apheori (GM): I don't get it.
Gaurav: Well, so, we're all here
And Rhu is blind, but that shouldn't stop us
What next?
Rhu:
rolling d20+9 religion check to ask Hazz' to help with this blindness thing
(
14
)
+9
=
23
Ganelon: He's saying that people with faith are always blind (to, presumably, the truth of objective reality).
Bear Soup Guy: This would be a good time for me to go AFK, if that's alright
I should only be about ten or fifteen minutes
Actually probably less.
Apheori (GM): Aiight.
Bear Soup Guy: Okay, see you guys in a bit!
Apheori (GM): Radek is way sarter than I am.
m
Rhu: BSG: ciao! Hope you're cat's tumor is better!
Gaurav: er ooc
When last we had a plan, we wanted to go find a Hole and experiment on it with our Hole-in-a-box
or something
Ganelon: No, we totally fixed the hole-in-a-box.
And I lost my poor pocket dimension.
Gaurav: We lost it?! How?
Ganelon: I don't properly remember.
Apheori (GM): Not that you guys should do anything specfic no, but you guys should check out George's theories too.
Ganelon: On what, this infection?
Apheori (GM): Mhm.
Gaurav: There is an airship port thing in the town. We could try to get a ride back to civilisation.
Apheori (GM): I think I need a nap. I'm falling asleep.
Sorry.
Ganelon: That's fine.
I won't likely forget George. He seems like a younger Radek in an age of less technological advancement.
He certainly seems to have the bitterness down, which is very important.
Gaurav: With 1.5 Radeks in our team, we can't lose!
Ganelon: No, but he still can.
For being trapped in the company of inescapable buffoons.
Your capacity for tomfoolery is staggering.
Gaurav: Hey, we're not all inescapable buffoons! Some of us are mad gods too.
Ganelon: That's an inclusive property.
Some of you are both inescapable buffoons AND mad gods.
Gaurav: Hmm. True.
Frezak (GM): I'm pretty escapable.
Ganelon: The guards would testify otherwise.
Frezak (GM): They didn't try hard enough!
Ganelon: Be honest.
Frezak (GM): My charge is only +12 vs AC.
+14 if I'm in Ram Form.
Ganelon: If Radek ran away and left you with the buffoons, how long would it take before you dug your way to him through the stuff of spacetime itself?
Frezak (GM): Also +2 speed in Ram form.
"remember the fun times we had"
"when we ran through walls"
Bear Soup Guy: Hi guys, I'm back!
Frezak (GM): SO YOU SAY
Bear Soup Guy: O_O
Apheori (GM): I'm awake.
No I'm not, butdo stuff.
Frezak (GM): Gravy is actually cool with setting up somewhere backwater and going back to digging.
Radek is the one that'll /want/ to go home.
Or at least somewhere sciencey.
Ganelon: He has a universe to fix.
Frezak (GM): Does he?
Why is it up to /him/ ?
Ganelon: Because everyone else is too bloody stupid, insane, or irresponsible to bother.
Frezak (GM): THANKS.
I'll just go and dig holes and stop bothering you!
GO try and help Codrichun with his problem.
Ganelon: You can't fill these holes with dirt!
Frezak (GM): WELL THEN
Ganelon: And you never explained how you fixed that one you actually did close!
Frezak (GM): YOU CLEARLY DONT NEED ME THEN
AT great cost, that's how.
Also the godshards told me to not do it again.
Ganelon: Well.
Radek does appreciate Gravy's help, he just doesn't think Gravy is capable of solving the problem on his own.
Frezak (GM): Gods no.
Ganelon: But of course, he DOES think that HE is capable of solving it, because he's a genius.
Frezak (GM): How?
TELL US HOW TO SOLVE THIS
Ganelon: He's still got to figure it out.
Frezak (GM): Good job Mr.Genius!
Ganelon: He has partial answers that need testing and theorizing and all that sciencey nonsense nobody actually wants to see happen in real-time.
Frezak (GM): Well if we don't it real-time then it's not going to happen.
So sit down and do science!
Greibel can try aromatherapy to cure Rhu.
And by aromaptherapy I mean drugs.
Ganelon: He will gladly do that.
Apheori (GM): There's an inn.
George is headed there.
Gaurav: I reluctantly acquiesce to this course of treatment.
Frezak (GM): He's ditching us?
Bastard!
Ganelon: You were just about to do the same thing!
Gaurav: You can't trust mini-Radeks. Only the real one.
Frezak (GM): Well yeah but only because I was leaving first and got interrupted by zombieings.
Gaurav: Radek needs a doing-science montage.
Apheori (GM): You guys were talking amongst yourselves. As far as he's concerned the situation is basically done.
Frezak (GM): Speaking of which, I get with the burying.
Just hope I don't find someone sleeping on the ground.
Apheori (GM): You find Dave sleeping on the ground.
Just kidding.
Frezak (GM): Well I'm not touching /that/
So Gravy goes and does what Gravy does best.
Ganelon: Science montage?
Frezak (GM): Drug montage?
Apheori (GM): What, out here?
Ganelon: Radek surrounded in papers, complaining about the fact that he has to use papers?
Nah, he'll get a room.
Even if he has to walk into someone's house and just demand they give him space to work.
Apheori (GM): The guardhouse is empty.
Gaurav: 0_0
Ganelon: Perfect.
Gaurav: Aw.
I was hoping to watch Radek kick someone out of their house.
Well, listen intently to.
Ganelon: "Sleep in the guardhouse! It's empty!"
Frezak (GM): I also loot the people I bury.
If they have anything interesting.
Ganelon: "But why aren't you-"
"SHUT UP WHILE I'M WORKING"
Rhu finds a room and spends him time in meditation, prayer and whinging about being blind.
Frezak (GM): You still have your divine magics, right?
Apheori (GM): You find some random bits of string, guns, a pretty necklace, wallets.
Frezak (GM): I assume radek has a gun fire and has no interest in 'em.
Unless.... are they magical?
Or science?
*has a seen a gun fire
Apheori (GM): They shoot energy. They're a bit magical.
Frezak (GM): I'll stack their armour and weapons and take 'em to the guardhouse later.
Ganelon: Keep 'em.
If it's magic.
It will be dussssssst.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You realise this is Hazz' doing. It's either a gift or perhaps a price.
Frezak (GM): Also the wallets.
Apheori (GM): For... something.
YAY WALLETS/
.
You find 302 gold.
Frezak (GM): Dow e have any need for that?
Rhu: (says out loud) A ... gift?
Hmm.
Frezak (GM): Does anyone HAVE money?
Apheori (GM): Money is important.
Gaurav: I have a gift. It is that I can't see anything any more.
Greibel silently sits on the floor and watches Rhu's meditation
Frezak (GM): Greibel sees a completely different meditation montage.
Apheori (GM): You can't see the others' faces anymore.
Frezak (GM): With fishes.
Apheori (GM): Important gift.
Ganelon: I have something that might be money.
Frezak (GM): Well that's just rude.
Ganelon: But not local currency.
Apheori (GM): Greibel, Rhu: d20s.
Gaurav:
rolling d20
(
1
)
=
1
Frezak (GM): I suppose I'll take the gold
YAAAAY
Gaurav: oooooooo
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
19
)
=
19
Apheori (GM): Hmm.
Rhu: You find yourself in the darkness surrounded by tentacles everywhere.
Greibel: You follow him.
Gaurav blinks, then blinks again. There are tentacles everywhere.
Rhu blinks, then blinks again. There are tentacles everywhere.
Rhu: ... well, I can see again. That's nice.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You can't see the tentacles. But you feel like you can. Closing or opening your eyes doesn't change anything. Though you may not notice.
Greibel: You can see them. They're really colourful.
Also seem to be covering something up.
Greibel: Hmmm
rolling 1d20+13 nature to try to learn about the tentacles
(
11
)
+13
=
24
Rhu closes his eyes and realises that he can still see them.
Rhu closes and opens his eyes a couple of times.
Rhu: Huh.
Apheori (GM): Should Radek walk in on them for any reason they'll both just look passed out.
Gaurav: Are you nature-checking my God?
Frezak (GM): That's really rude, man.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: The tentacles appear to be smokable.
Also they're not, strictly speaking, really there. But then neither are you.
It's all basically a projection.
Gaurav: Please don't smoke my God.
On the other hand, if you smoke him, you might *become* him, and that'd be interesting.
Apheori (GM): Oh, so it's only fine when it's someone else's god?
Frezak (GM): "Is THIS your God?"
Gaurav: It's less awkward?
Ganelon: It's definitely less awkward.
Bear Soup Guy: Greibel didn't know it was Hazz D:
Ganelon: As for Radek, if he walked in on them, he'd just call them a bunch of deadbeat slackers and carry on with his business.
Apheori (GM): Greibel still doesn't know it's Hazz, unless Rhu tells him.
Gaurav: Can Rhu see Griebel?
Apheori (GM):
Gaurav: I thought he was just sensing the tentacles.
Apheori (GM): Rhu can see him if he Looks.
Gaurav: Naah, he's happy with the tentacles.
Oh, wait, Greibel said "hmm" earlier.
Rhu: Greibel? Is that you?
Apheori (GM): I want to see Greibel smoke tentacles.
I mean...
Rhu: I feel ... tentacles. I think we're in the realm of Hazz'ridan again.
Apheori (GM): Nevermind.
Rhu: It's somewhere near the City of the Dead.
This is where I found the sphinx.
Rhu goes quiet.
Greibel: Oh....well then, my first question would be "How do we get out? Right now. Please. Oh God, please."
Hazz'ridan: Welcome.
Rhu: My Lord. *bows*
Greibel: Howdy
Greibel waves
Hazz'ridan waves a tentacle.
Rhu follows where the tentacle is waving and looks for Greibel
Apheori (GM): Greibel: Rhu tries to run into you.
Greibel steps out of the way but tries to grab him by the scruff of his shirt before he runs off into nothing
Hazz'ridan: What brings you to My domain?
Rhu: My Lord, I ... I am blind.
Bear Soup Guy: "A roll of 1"
Frezak (GM): "terrible RNG, lord."
Hazz'ridan: Yes.
Gaurav: Heeee
Rhu: I feel that this comes from you somehow. A gift. A price.
Hazz'ridan: Yes.
Rhu: What gift, my lord? What price?
Frezak (GM): "Was it the milk?"
Hazz'ridan: It is the world. I am your gift. Your price to see.
Rhu bows before him, hiding his confusion as best he can.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: A tentacle tries to get into your ear.
Greibel swats it away
Greibel: Listen, you seem like a nice dude, but I'm not gonna have any brain parasites messing me up, thank you very much.
Rhu: Brain parasites?
Greibel: He was touching my ear, Rhu.
That's just rude. Even for a God.
Frezak (GM): Totes.
Punish him!
RELEASE THE EAGLE
Rhu: Ah. Er. Well. Hm.
Greibel looks in the direction of Hazz's voice as he says the last line
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You hear laughter fading away.
And not like Amadi laughter, either.
Gaurav: He's got a real sense of humour, that one.
Oh?
Greibel looks around suspiciously
Greibel: I painted a place kind of like this once.
Admittedly it wasn't a very good painting.
And I didn't use real paint.
It was during my avant-garde phase.
Rhu: When was that?
Greibel shrugs
Greibel remembers Rhu can't see
Greibel: Oh, I just shrugged. The was a shrugging silence.
Bear Soup Guy: that*
Frezak (GM): "I shru" GODS DAMN YOU BSG
Rhu: Oh! Right.
Gaurav: Do the tentacles still surround us? Is there ... any way out?
Bear Soup Guy: :D
Apheori (GM): Tentacles wrap around you.
Huge, massive, and to Greibel, very, very colourful tentacles.
Frezak (GM): Joy piled upon joy.
Apheori (GM): They squeeze.
Rhu: ... Lord?
Apheori (GM): You are crushed by tentacles! And then you're back in the room meditating.
Rhu gasps for breath
Apheori (GM) throws some joy at Frezak.
Rhu: They're gone ...
Greibel: Humph
Worst astral projection ever.
Rhu: Hey!
I could see.
Well, I could see His tentacles.
I couldn't see you.
I could see ... Him.
Still blind, though.
Rhu: How can this be a gift?
Greibel: It's a mad God's idea of a gift
He probably forgot the meaning of the word
Rhu: Huh.
Maybe.
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20+11 (Heal) Greibel goes to inspect Rhu's eyes to see if there are physical signs of what's going on
(
18
)
+11
=
29
Frezak (GM): They're filled with woooorms
Bear Soup Guy: AH GOD WORM EYES
Apheori (GM): Tentacles?
Gaurav: Those are tentacles! Idiots.
Apheori (GM): HIS EYES ARE FULL OF TENTACLES?!
Frezak (GM): I'm not a cultist!
Ganelon: I already checked, but maybe you'll see something different.
Frezak (GM): I don't know the lingo!
Apheori (GM): Naw, they look normal.
Bear Soup Guy: Aw, damn
Apheori (GM): But Greibel's heal check goes further than mere looks.
Frezak (GM): "normal" because they're usually filled with wrigglies
Bear Soup Guy: Yay heal check!
Apheori (GM): And he discovers...
...um...
He discovers...
Frezak (GM): GOLD
AND MAGIC DUST
Gaurav: YES!
Frezak (GM): AND SHOVELS
Bear Soup Guy: "A coin! Behind your ear!"
Apheori (GM): What's english for vinculo?
Frezak (GM): "An eye! Behind your ear- ewwww"
NO IDEA.
Gaurav: I was wondering why I was looking over my own shoulder.
Frezak (GM): Mystery solved!
Bear Soup Guy: ZING
Frezak (GM): "I'd have gotten away for it if wasn't for that drug-dusted druid who was also a dog at times"
*away with it
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Apheori (GM): Greibel: He can't see not because of anything wrong with him physially - it's an issue with his soul. Somehow he's tied to Hazz now, and he can
t see, and all that he can see is HAzz as a result.
Gaurav: DO NOTHING ABOUT IT
Hazz' can only see Hazz'? What a self-centred guy.
Apheori (GM): Hazz can see everything.
Gaurav: But I, tied to Hazz', can't?
Apheori (GM): Nope.
Ganelon: That almost sounds inconvenient.
But Hazz would never inconvenience someone.
That's ridiculous.
Gaurav: Amen.
Eh, anyway.
Rhu is blind and belongs to Hazz'. Whatevs.
How goes the sciencing?
Ganelon: Good question.
Miss DM?
Apheori (GM): What allwere you doing?
Frezak (GM): Doing the Gravy Thing.
And then returning with the guard's gear in case Radek can do anything with any of it.
Apheori (GM): I mean the sciencing.
Ganelon: Still working on the Hole Solution.
Apheori (GM): IsGravy helping with te science now?
Ganelon: I think he's keeping the infection controlled.
Frezak (GM): I don't think I can really contribute to science.
Ganelon: He's trying to figure out what's missing from the formula that fixes holes.
Apheori (GM): Anyone can contribute. Anyone.
Frezak (GM): (it's probably shovels)
Apheori (GM): I'll take three arcana rolls and a sanity check.
Are you using any particular artifacts or computing devices?
Ganelon: I have a computer.
I don't think the shield thing would help much.
Possibly the stuff of TIME and NONEXISTENCE might.
Apheori (GM): Gimme the rolls, then.
Gaurav: We should pour it over random things and see what happens.
Ganelon: Oh, and I did take samples of water that was touching the first hole.
Apheori (GM): Before I fall asleep.
Ganelon: But maybe it's just water now.
rolling 1d20+12
(
16
)
+12
=
28
rolling 1d20+12
(
11
)
+12
=
23
rolling 1d20+12
(
11
)
+12
=
23
rolling 1d20 CRAZY
(
10
)
=
10
Hm. Not bad.
Frezak (GM): decent.
Apheori (GM): You make progress. Some sort of idea that needs proper investigation. You need three pieces to make a lock?
That doesn't make sense.
Gaurav: Doesn't it?
We have three crazy characters. And we used to have a skull.
Did we ever try opening a door with Dave?
Apheori (GM): What happened to the skull?
Frezak (GM): At some point of the evening i'll walk in with a pile of guardstuffs.
And ask Radek if he can use any of it.
Gaurav: Rhu still has the skull, but he thinks it's the non-magical one from Midnight, but it might have turned back into a magic skull when we left there.
Radek: You brought their guns?
The Gravedigger: Yup.
Radek: Good, set them down over... there.
Any of that other junk seem magical to you?
Frezak (GM): I don't think I have much a magic detection ability.
Unless the guardzombie I beat up seemed to have armour that was more resilient than I expected.
Apheori (GM): nOPE.
The Gravedigger: Uh.
No?
Apheori (GM): All fairlynorml.
Radek: You'd feel it. Do whatever you like with it. Make a fort for the two deadbeats, maybe.
Frezak (GM): I'll just leave 'em in the guardhouse.
Ganelon: He'll take a break to turn the magical components of them guns into DUST.
Frezak (GM): I'll go check up on the other deadbeats.
The Gravedigger: Hello, fellow deadbeats.
Rhu: Hey!
Greibel: Howdy
Apheori (GM):
rolling 8d100
(
39
+
57
+
15
+
57
+
14
+
44
+
35
+
78
)
=
339
You getthat much dust.
Ganelon: Awesome.
The Gravedigger: Anything fun happen?
The Gravedigger flexes gleaming muscles.
Ganelon: ...
Is he trying to insinuate something?
Greibel: We went to tentacle world for a bit
Rhu nods
Frezak (GM): Just that he's been busy doing things.
The Gravedigger: Huh.
Hazz give you eyeballs, Rhu?
The Gravedigger waves a hand in front of Rhu.
Rhu: No. He said it was a gift.
It doesn't make sense. What sort of gift is blindness?
The Gravedigger: Damn.
THink Radek can rig you up with an artifical eye?
Rhu: Hey. Hey!
That is an idea.
Greibel: An idea that probably won't work, unfortunately.
There's nothing wrong with his vision. The problem is likely right in the visual cortex.
His mind is linked with Hazz for as long as the sociopath decides it's useful to him.
Apheori (GM): XD
Greibel: No offense, Rhu
Rhu sighs
The Gravedigger: Then maybe we should go kick a god in the voolnerables?
Rhu: I'm sure there's ... a reason for this. I just wish I knew what it was.
Amadi falls slowly out of the sky, like a dandelion seed.
Rhu: In my present state, I wouldn't even be able to see where his voolnerables were.
The Gravedigger: Your god's a dick?
No offense;
Well I could find them and hold you in front of them?
Amadi: I concur.
Greibel nods knowingly at Amadi
Amadi bounces off the ground and starts rising again.
The Gravedigger: Hey sandwich kid.
Rhu grins
Ganelon: "HEY RADEK WE NEED YOU TO MAKE AN EYE"
"DID YOU FUCKING BREAK MY EYEBOT AGAIN!?"
Rhu: He might not have any. He's all tentacles.
Frezak (GM): "Radek! Fix Mr whizzy! He's bro-ho-ho-keeeeen" *sobs*
The Gravedigger: I'm sure Amadi could find some.
Or make some;
Amadi yells from however high she's gotten;
Amadi: You'd be better off with cats!
The Gravedigger: I hate cats!
Amadi drifts away into the clouds.
Gaurav: We're ... indoors?
Is she jumping around right outside the window?
Ellemerr: You think she cares?
Gaurav: She's jumping through the ceiling?
Damn. I wish Rhu could see that.
Apheori (GM): Drifted right through the roof, man.
Ellemerr: At some point he'll realize he's got the wrong god, man.
Apheori (GM): Rhu d20
Ellemerr: Anyway.
Ellemerr goes to bed.
Rhu:
rolling d20
(
12
)
=
12
Gaurav: Anyway
let's go somewhere
or call it a day
not that Rhu isn't having a great time hanging out in a room feeling sorry for himself, but
Frezak (GM): Welp.
Did Radek make progress?
Ganelon: What he needs is a new brain.
Yes.
Some sort of progress.
Gaurav: What about miniRadek?
Might be useful to bounce ideas off of, at least.
Hazz'ridan: Patience, Rhu. Remember your task.
Er, that was whispered.
Hazz'ridan hurls tentacles any anyone who dares to argue.
Gaurav: Didn't someone say something about miniRadek (George?) having a plan to stop the zombies?
Rhu tries to pull himself together. He stands slowly, takes a deep breath, and -- with his hands in front of him -- finds the door.
Rhu then trips over the doorstop and falls over
Apheori (GM): What's Greibel doing?
Bear Soup Guy: Probably drugs
Frezak (GM): I catch the Avenger!
Apheori (GM): Is he?
Bear Soup Guy: He is
Gaurav: Yay!
Bear Soup Guy: Calming down after tentacle molestation
Rhu: Thanks.
Apheori (GM): One of the drugs turns out to be the porridge.
Greibel coughs heavily
Apheori (GM): It drops a bunch of truffles in your lap.
Gaurav: Yay! Porridge is back!
Greibel pets Rasputin
The porridge jiggles.
Ganelon: I agree with visiting George.
Frezak (GM): Let's roll up, hero-style;
GUNS BLAZING
Or not.
Gaurav: I'll hobble behind y'all
Frezak (GM): I can fukken carry you.
Gaurav: ... that works!
Frezak (GM): or you can ride a druid
If he turns into something mounteable.
The porridge: Such options.
Oops, ooc
Frezak (GM): SHut up, porridge.
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Radek: Now, where did that guardsman run off to? The competent one.
Gaurav: Either option is fine, as long as we keep moving.
Apheori (GM): Yay moving.
Y'ALL HEAD OUTSIDE AND HOPEFULLY ONE OF YOU REMEMBERS WHERE GEORGE WENT.
Ganelon: You said the inn last time
Apheori (GM): Good, you remembered.
Gaurav wants to call it a day.
Bear Soup Guy: We've had a good long session, might not be a bad idea
Gaurav: Apheori doesn't, so it's really up to y'all! I don't mind as long as we keep moving. Rhu is unhappy, no reason to also be bored sitting in a room.
Bear Soup Guy: I'll have to do some recording later on but for now I don't mind continuing
Frezak (GM): I'm cool with stopping around now, actually.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Ganelon: Yeah.
This is a decent time.
Apheori (GM): When shall the next be?
Can everyone do sunday?
Frezak (GM): I can't.
Apheori (GM): THIS TIME?
Pfft.
When can you?
Frezak (GM): I.... don't know.
Probably not until wednesday, MAYBE Tuesday.
Apheori (GM): I can't do tuesday.
Wednesday, then?
Frezak (GM): Probably, not certainly.
Gaurav: Wednesday and Thursday I'm going to be on a train.
What about next Sunday? August 31?
Apheori (GM): I have no idea where I will be or what I'll be doing after the 28th.
How about the following sunday? >.<
We can all just come back to it then.
Assuming I'm back from holiday by then. Dunno why I wouldn't be.
Gaurav: Sunday, September 7? Works for me.
Frezak (GM): That's too far for me to say.
Apheori (GM): We'll come back to the figuring out when next week, then.
Bear Soup Guy: Generally I'm always available Sundays so that should be good for me
Gaurav: My classes start next week, so scheduling becomes a little tricky for me then. Hooray for school!
Bear Soup Guy: But yeah, we can confer on it in the time in between
Frezak (GM): SChoooool
Gaurav: Saturdays, Sundays and Wednesdays should be okay for me. The rest remain to be seen.
Cool. See you guys next week to plan something!
Ganelon: See ya.
Bear Soup Guy: Adios!
Apheori (GM) cackles and hugs y'all.
(To Rhu): Whether you get pissed off or not, just remember - I will always be in your mind.

Session 32

Apheori (GM): Okay, so the situation now is that you're all outside the guardhouse, apparently headed to the inn to talk to George, the guard who might have had an idea about the zombies. Gravy is apparently carrying Rhu. Greibel is petting the porridge.
Dave and Amadi are elsewhere.
DO YOU DO ANYHING OUTSIDE?
Frezak (GM): Presumably we walk to the inn.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Rhu tries desperately to avoid squealing "wheee!" and to focus on all the reasons for him to be sad.
Apheori (GM): Inn is standard fantasy inn with a really bad bard. Folks throw things at the bard occasionally.
There's an innkeeper, also glaring at the bard.
George is in the corner wearing a pair of industrial earmuffs.
Frezak (GM): Industrial?
Apheori (GM): The sort folks use when jackhammering a sidewalk.
Gaurav: Someone is presumably making a killing selling those in this town.
But why not just get rid of the bard instead? Maybe he's extremely powerful and we should hire him.
Frezak (GM): Anyone have Telepathy?
Gaurav: Frezak: How is Gravy carrying Rhu? Has he put me down yet?
Apheori (GM): Rhu might have telepathy. Roll sanity to find out!
Gaurav: ?!?!
Rhu:
rolling d20
(
12
)
=
12
Apheori (GM): Nope, he's just blind.
Gaurav: Yay!
Maybe a very high insight counts as telepathy? Mine's 7. But it might be easier to just tower over George and see where that gets us.
Apheori (GM): Aye, talking to people is probably a good place to start.
Frezak (GM): What did we even want?
Gaurav: Have we figured out where we are yet?
I think it was mostly that he had an alternate theory about why the Holes were around, and he talked sense about the local government, so we think he might have noticed something that we haven't.
Ludicrous as that sounds.
Oh.
Apheori (GM): George had mentioned something about the source of the zombies.
Gaurav: We could also stop the bard, which might get him to take the ear protectors off. Maybe Greibel could turn into a hundred million birds and sign at him.
sing*
Frezak (GM): I think he did mention a nearby town that was familiar in name.
Apheori (GM): What was the name?
Also some of you might be hungry by now.
Frezak (GM): I don't remember.
Else I'd have said something more precise.
Apheori (GM): Oh.
Okay.
So everyone just stands around awkwardly?
Frezak (GM): Is the bard bad enough to reasonably justify the use of earmuffs?
Apheori (GM): Potentially.
Rhu remains awkwardly in Gravy's arms.
Apheori (GM): It may also have something to do with what he's singing about.
Because now he starts singing about you guys. It's kind of insulting. And screechy. And a bit waily.
Bear Soup Guy: Is it RACIST
awww
Apheori (GM): Some of it.
The racism is mitigated by his having no idea what race most of you are.
So it's more along the lines of log-man hoisted by a dog-man, big big big dog-man, all about are soggy men, loiging in a bog-man...
Then it dissolves into a largely unintelligible mess.
Bear Soup Guy: Randy Newman, ladies and gentlemen!
Rhu: (under his breath) ... what is going on?
Frezak (GM): I'll head up to the bar and ask the Barman if the bard is like the son of some lord or if there's any reason I can't just toss him out.
Apheori (GM): Was he the one in that apocalypse family guy episode?
Bear Soup Guy: He was
Apheori (GM): Heeeeee, yes
.
That guy.
Bear Soup Guy: Sweet :D
Apheori (GM): Singing about what he sees.
Frezak: Barman says no, they're not even sue where the guy came from, just that he keeps coming back and the bouncer gave up on removing him. Barman also asks you why you're carrying that stick of an elf and if you intend to use Rhu's boniness as a weapon.
Barman also also mentions that they have a size limit on allowed weapons, so the answer to that needs to be no.
Rhu: (under his breath) What bony elf?
The Gravedigger: Nah, he's a passenger.
Frezak (GM): I'll put the Avenger on a chair and go pick up teh bard.
Apheori (GM): Bard runs away when you come near him, and also starts singing faster and louder.
Other folks in the inn are starting to watch with interest.
Roll to grab the bard anyway or something.
Frezak (GM): Tell my Shovel to bonk him on teh head.
Chainreach SHovel Daily pwoer.
Rhu realises that he's at a table, leans onto it, and says to anybody else at the table: "Excuse me, have you seen a bony elf around here somewhere? I think that terrible singer is looking for one."
Apheori (GM): Is that an attack?
Frezak (GM): yup
Apheori (GM): Roll to attack.
Greibel walks over to Rhu confused as to why he's talking to a table with nobody sitting at it
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+9
(
17
)
+9
=
26
VS AC
On a hit he's knocked down.
Apheori (GM): Yup, that totally hits him, knocks him down, and causes him to start shrieking unintelligibly.
It's really high-pitched and rather uncomfortable.
Gaurav: Does that attack come with any sound effects?
Frezak (GM): I'll go drag him outside and throw him into a hole.
Yes.
Apheori (GM): The other folks in the inn look decidedly pained and one guy passes out.
Frezak (GM): SPOIIIIING
Apheori (GM): You throw him in the hole and he still shrieks.
The rest of you: everyone in the inn seems much happier.
Passed out guy starts snoring.
George doesn't seem to have noticed any of this past his earmuffs.
Frezak (GM): I'll head back to the Inn.
Grumps here?
Apheori (GM): Grumps?
Bear Soup Guy: Two guesses who Grumps is :P
Apheori (GM): Must be Greibel.
Gravy: The barman pours you a drink.
Bear Soup Guy: I AM TIRED OF ALL OF THESE DRUGS. DON'T TOUCH ME.
Apheori (GM): BSG: Tried medicating Rhu?
Bear Soup Guy: That was supposed to have (Greibel) at the front but apparently it thought my triable brackets were HTML code
Triable
Triangle
Apheori (GM): <
Bear Soup Guy: I think I tried healing Rhu before, right?
Apheori (GM): Healing, yes. Not drugging.
Bear Soup Guy: I found out that he's linked to Hazz in a non-biological way
Ahhhhh
Gaurav: Did you try curing the blindness? I thought you only tried curing the eels. But I might be wrong.
"non-biological way" oooo
Apheori (GM): There's nothing he could do with standard healing.
Bear Soup Guy: "Sounds kinky."
Gaurav: Only way it could be with Hazz.
All those tentacles.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: Some things are glowing, apparently from one of the drugs you took. If you were radek you might experiment on Rhu to see if drug effects bypass blindness, but you're probably not drugged enough.
Or something.
Bear Soup Guy: I might have something for him...
Rhu continues conversing to the empty table.
Bear Soup Guy: Would it be terribly counter-productive if I re-enacted that scene from Cheech And Chong's Up In Smoke where Chong accidentally gives Cheech acid?
Apheori (GM): Maybe, but it'd be hilarious.
Gaurav: Criminey. Can you at least roll to pick the right potion?
Bear Soup Guy: Right!
Gaurav: If potion is the word I'm looking for.
Bear Soup Guy: Okay, good point
I'll roll a....something, to rummage through my pack looking for white pills that look a lot like other white pills
Gaurav: Hee
Apheori (GM): Roll perception.
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20+11 Greibel remarks "Hold on Rhu, I've got something that'll mellow your mind, man." before rummaging through his pack.
(
3
)
+11
=
14
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You find some white pills.
Greibel: Here ya go, man. Take these.
Rhu: Eh? What? Huh?
Rhu takes the pills, sniffs suspiciously at them, then shrugs and swallows.
Gaurav: Welp, it was nice knowing you guys.
Bear Soup Guy: :D
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You notice no effect at all.
Rhu: That was nice, Greibel, thanks. Vitamins?
Greibel: Yeah, Vitamin Q (OOC: We're in the FUTURE, there is totally a Vitamin Q) and some supplements.
It might enhance your other senses a bit.
Ganelon: Okay, I think I might be caught up?
Why are we in a bar?
Rhu: Oh, NICE. I could really use that!
Rhu grins and nods in entirely the wrong direction.
Frezak (GM): Because that's where the helpful guard went
Apheori (GM): Followed George. The min-Radek.
mini*
Rhu starts ballancing a small black stone on his head.
Ganelon: I suppose that means that Radek is grumping around with George.
Gaurav: Does Rhu know that he's doing that, or is he just absent-mindedly balancing this stone?
Apheori (GM): Nope.
Just absent-mindedly.
Gaurav: Ha, nice.
Apheori (GM): Radek: George is wearing earmuffs and doesn't notice you immediately.
Frezak (GM): I could fix that!
Apheori (GM): Frezak: How deep was the hole you dumped the bard in?
Frezak (GM): Eh, I made spare anti-zombie graves.
So deeper than usual.
say about eight feet.
Ostensibly something you can't crawl out of.
Radek slides up next to George. He'd fashion a substitute for earmuffs himself, but he's already an old man and probably doesn't need the help.
Ganelon: Does he have a sci-fi hearing aid? Probably, because I've never made a point of him screeching "WHAT!?" at people talking to him.
Though in retrospect that seems like a good way to get them to stop talking to him.
Apheori (GM): Sure, why not.
Ganelon: I will remember it for later.
Gaurav: We might still be wearing in-ear headphones from the original survey of Sarathi. Or maybe I'm misremembering that we had those?
Frezak (GM): I do believe we all communication units.
Gaurav: Not Rhu. He bashed his against a rock in Arah.
Frezak (GM): Sensible.
George doesn't seem to notice Radek. He's just staring at his drink.
Rhu: (in the direction that Greibel had been speaking from earlier) Where are Dave and Amadi? Are they still with us?
Amadi appears.
Bear Soup Guy: Where did the- Oh
Amadi: No. No, we're not.
Ganelon: Alwaaaayssssss~
Greibel: Definitive answer from the source
Rhu: (looks towards Greibel, then towards Amadi, then back towards Greibel)
One of you is wrong.
Amadi: I'm never wrong.
Rhu: Okay then.
Is Dave still around?
George suddenly notices Radek, almost jumps out of his chair, and pulls off an earmuff.
George: How long have you been there?
Ellemerr: Is Dave still around?
Apheori (GM): Dave is not here.
Radek: ...A few minutes.
Don't worry, I appreciate the silence.
Amadi: Depends. Around what?
Radek: Any minute now I'm expecting one of the deadbeats to come pestering me about some new problem.
Ellemerr: Where did I leave Squirrel? Did I leave Squirrel? Is she with Dave?
I don't remember anything.
Rhu: Around ... here?
I dunno.
Bear Soup Guy: Yeah, squirrel is still with Dave
Ellemerr: Except that I had revenge on a guy who totally deserved it for some reason.
George looks back, assumes Radek means his companions, and shrugs.
George: They seem occupied.
Radek: Yes, that is how the problems get started.
Rhu: I don't think Hazz' seriously expects me to able to protect you two without ... you know (gestures at his face). But I hope she's okay with that crazy guard.
Radek: Sometimes they're not responsible. I still have to fix it all, though.
George: Is that how you wound up here?
Amadi: Oh, she's fiiine, they're both fiiiine.
Radek: I think I would go insane trying to understand how I wound up here.
Rhu looks at Amadi suspiciously but doesn't say anything.
Rhu: Are we in a pub? Do they have sandwiches?
Amadi: Are we in a pub? Why are we in a pub?
I have sandwiches.
Rhu: Radek and Gravy said something about some guy they liked the look off. Something about the Holes?
... I'm sure they can make me one here. If I just knew who to ask.
Amadi: Oh, yeah. You should probably fix the Holes.
George: Rhu: You suddenly realise you can see Amadi.
Er, ooc.
Rhu: That's *their* job (pointing towards the restrooms). I'm just supposed to keep an eye on Dave and you. And that skull that has someone's soul in it, I guess.
Gaurav: No, I like the idea of George shouting at us from across the room :-P
Amadi: Yeah, and Squirrel.
... I left her with Dave. They're fiiiine.
Apheori (GM): George and Radek are talking in a corner.
Gaurav: Is she surrounded by darkness?
Like, can I see nothing else, or is there ... tentacles?
Apheori (GM): Gravy and Greibel can probably hear them, but I dunno about Rhu.
Rhu: Just Amadi. Some glowiness. A weight on your head.
Bear Soup Guy: Rhu ostensibly should have better hearing than all of us now because KIND OF SCIENCE
Rhu stares at Amadi for a second.
Rhu: Hi?
Apheori (GM): Radek: George asks you what all you're trying to solve.
Rhu waves at Amadi
Amadi turns to the nearest pub-working-person-thing and asks sweetly, "Can we have a sandwich? I already have one but my friend doesn't and I'd like to compare; I got this bit of wiggly thing in mine and I'm just not sure they're supposed to be like that?"
Amadi waves at Rhu.
Radek: Oh, the whole universe is coming apart at the seams.
Gaurav: "bit of wiggly thing", hee
Radek: Holes connecting planes of existence that should never interact with each other opening up everywhere.
Rhu stares at Amadi some more, then turns around to see if he can see anything else.
Rhu absentmindedly reaches up to take the stone off his head and puts it on the table.
Amadi reaches out to pick up the stone.
Apheori (GM): The barman asks Gravy if Amadi is with them.
Radek: I've closed /one/. I'm trying to improve the method.
Apheori (GM): George stares at Radek and then says, "Oh fuck."
And then he downs his drink.
Frezak (GM): Gravy shrugs.
The Gravedigger: Could be one or t'other.
Rhu: Greibel? Are you still here?
Greibel: Here as I'll ever be
Apheori (GM): The barman hands Amadi a rather tired-looking sandwich.
Radek: Well, don't worry too much. This place seems fine, other than the zombies.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You can see a sort of glow that might be an outline of Greibel. IT might not be.
Radek: If a hole opens up I'm sure we'll head on over to try and fix it. No guarantees something idiotic won't happen and stick us between the fabric of reality, though...
Radek sighs.
Radek: Again.
Rhu: Are you ... there? (points at the Greibel-outlining glow)
Amadi: Hmm... Well, there's no sort of wriggle bit, but... I'm still not too sure about this. Here.
Ganelon: By something idiotic, he means that he generally expects it to be someone's fault.
Amadi hands the sandwich to Rhu.
Gaurav: Can I see the sandwich?
Greibel puts his hand on Rhu's shoulder
George: The zombies may be coming out of a... hole.
Greibel goes "BLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH" and then starts laughing
Radek: Oh?
George: Where reality just gets weird around it. And the closer you get, the more likely...
Well, they sent in a unit. They came out zombie.
Radek: Yes, yes, that sounds like one.
Maybe I can fix both of your problems at once, then, George.
George: You have some way to make people less stupid?
If that were so, you'd look happier.
Radek looks at George for a moment, and laughs. He laughs for a long time.
George: Which problems did you mean, then?
Ellemerr: Happy Radek. A stange, half-nice half-supercreepy sight.
Ganelon: It is a /hollow/ laugh, Merr.
Gaurav: _half_ supercreepy?
Ellemerr: He seems happier than usual, anyway.
Radek: Just the ones threatening your life, I'm afraid.
Gaurav: we have to bring George with us. The Misanthropic Duo.
George: Oh.
George sighs.
Ellemerr: "Hooray, someone finally understands me! This is the happiest day since I got covered in liquid metal-stuff!"
Radek: I'll remember to find you if I ever find a cure for stupidity. You do the same, alright?
George: Oh, I've found A cure. Just not a good one.
And generally I wind up arresting those who administer it.
Gaurav: DM: Amadi handed Rhu a sandwich. Could I see the sandwich, or just her empty hand? And did I see the Greibel-shaped outline put his hand on my shoulder and then shout in my ear?
Apheori (GM): Just to be clear, the outline did say blaaaaargh.
Gaurav: HUH.
Apheori (GM): You just see a darker smudge where the sandwich it.
is
Rhu pokes at the darker smudge
Rhu: Is this a ... sandwich?
Amadi: Oh, for the sake of ice-cream!
Amadi digs in frustration through her pockets and hands Rhu a mask.
Gaurav: Ellemerr: did you perception that rock I took off my head? It might be another one of those rocks-with-shapes-on-'em things we've been correcting!
Apheori (GM): Now I want ice cream.
What did you do with the rock?
(From Amadi): I have no idea what the mask does. In my head it might make him see things like this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zKpYXkcVJGs
Rhu pokes at the gap between her fingers/the mask, depending on whether I can see it or not.
Rhu: What is this?
Ellemerr: Oh, I picked it up. Then I got distracted by sandwiches. I can look at it now while he's distracted by my mask.
Amadi: It might help.
Gaurav: The Distraction Duo.
Rhu feels it/looks at it, realises that it's a mask, and tries putting it on the wrong way around.
Gaurav: If the mask doesn't magically twist itself around to conform to my face, I'll try it the other way around.
Apheori (GM): It doesn't do anything weird. Yet.
Radek pats George on the back. Softly - he couldn't make much of an impact even if he tried.
Radek: Well, I'd be lying if I said /I/ never tried to build a doomsday device. It's hard to be grateful about the end of all things when it's actually happening, though.
Apheori (GM): Amadi: The rock had the symbol for contagion on it.
Ellemerr: Delightful!
Who had the other rocks?
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You put the mask on properly, and now you can sort of see. Now everything looks like muppets. And there's mould or something everywhere. Everything is kind of fuzzy/hairy, at any rate.
Rhu: HUH.
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Rhu takes the mask off, checks to see that he's still blind, then puts the mask back on.
Amadi: So can you eat now?
Rhu: Greibel, you have GOT to try this sometime.
Rhu puts on and takes off the mask a couple of times, then leaves it on.
Rhu: Thanks, Mrs. Teatime! I like what you've done with your hair.
I can see! I CAN SEE! And also eat, I think.
Amadi: No problem.
... This rock is camouflaged as toxic waste. Or something. I think. Or maybe it's the other way around. Do you want it?
George: Yeah, no kidding. Nevermind all the idiots that live here, I have to live here too.
Rhu: I'm always happy to hold onto stones! I've got two already, I think. Are you going to eat that furry-looking sandwich? I'm famished.
Amadi: I got it for you! I already have one.
Apheori (GM): Entirely unrelatedly, blackberry syrup apparently curdles baileys.
Rhu: Oh, thanks a million! That's very nice of you.
Rhu guzzles down the sandwich.
Rhu: Hang on, I need to try something.
Rhu tries to walk to the bar by using the mask.
Gaurav: Is that an easy enough thing to do or should I roll something?
Apheori (GM): d20
Gaurav: Also: huh. Is the blackberry syrup still pretty fresh?
Rhu:
rolling d20
(
11
)
=
11
Radek: Can't help you with that, I'm afraid. I'd offer to take you with me, but... you would regret it.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You walk into the bar and bounce off.
Your depth perception is really... weird.
And bouncy.
Radek: I /can/ fix the hole, though, if you'll point me over that way.
Apheori (GM): The syrup is very fresh.
Gaurav: Do I bounce gently or rapidly?
Apheori (GM): It feels like... both?
George: Hah!
Well, sure. I'll take you there tomorrow, how's that sound?
File the paperwork, send out all the requisitions...
Rhu:
rolling d20+10 acrobatics check to catch myself and try to approach the bar again
(
13
)
+10
=
23
George mumbles incoherently.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You approach the bar again. d20, please.
Gaurav: BSG: do you still have the other stones we found? You might want to take Amadi's stone from her, in case she vanishes.
Rhu:
rolling d20
(
7
)
=
7
Bear Soup Guy: Did I have the stones?
Gaurav: I have two. I thought you had the other ... one? Two?
Bear Soup Guy: I might have
Oy, my memory is as bad as Greibel's
If I had it though then I still have it in my pack
Gaurav: I have rock-with-bird and rock-with-tree.
Apheori (GM): Do you keep an inventory in your journal?
Gaurav: Your inventory says "Two shiny stones"
Bear Soup Guy: Oh, so it does
So I guess I do have two, then
What was your original question? XD
Apheori (GM): Rhu: This time you go to the counter and it seems like you walk through it partway.
Rhu: Um.
Apheori (GM): You can keep walking or stop and/or backup.
BSG: He wants you to take the stone away from Amadi and add it to your pile.
Radek: That would be great. I could use the time to work on this formula, anyways.
Rhu stops, then quickly walks backward, a little embarrassed to be messing with the laws of physics. He checks to see if Radek is pissed off with him for doing this, but he seems to be pretty involved with his conversation.
Greibel: (To Amadi) Mind if I pocket that away with the others?
Ganelon: "Hey, Rhu! Stop violating natural laws!"
Rhu: For future reference (i.e. put this in your inventory!), Greibel's two stones have a stylised mask and a dragon on them respectively.
Gaurav: "Sorry Radek! Walking around in a mask while blind is hard!"
Amadi shrugs and takes out her sandwich, eyeing the wiggly bit suspiciously.
Gaurav: err that last was ooc
Bear Soup Guy: Got it
Bear Soup Guy takes the stone, examines it a bit, then stuffs it in the pack with the others
Bear Soup Guy: err IC
Ganelon: Did I have a stone?
I don't think so, but if I'm supposed to, it's not written down.
Apheori (GM): They probably have all of them, then.
Ganelon: Alright then.
George: Great. I'll be here.
Gaurav: Yeah, I think it was just Greibel and me collecting stones like it ain't even a thing.
Heh. "I'll be here" is such an RPG I'm-out-of-things-to-say line. I assume every time we try to talk to George he'll say something like "Come back tomorrow so I can take you to the Hole nearby."
Rhu tries to catch the barkeep's attention, and tries to buy a beer with the coins we found in the lab.
Bear Soup Guy: Gaur: XD
Radek stands up and glances about the room, surprised to see it still in relatively undamaged condition.
Ganelon: What's Gravy doing?
Frezak (GM): DUnno, I'm just about to leave.
Won't be back 'till an hour or so.
Apheori (GM): The barkeep accepts them, seems surprised, mentions something about Auberdeen, and gives Rhu a beer.
Ellemerr: I sort of have an appointment I should be leaving for, too. But how long are we intending to go on anyway?
Gaurav: I can play for exactly two more hours, and then I gotta go listen to a man about a genome.
Ellemerr: Exactly two hours? So at... ten to half whatever-it-would-be-over there...
Gaurav: Yup! Class starts at half-past. I am consistently late to this class, but since I bothered to get up in time to get to school in time for D&D, I can actually be there five minutes *before* it starts instead of ten minutes after.
Ellemerr: Right. xD
Well... Amadi is likely to disappear at some point. But since this is nothing new...
Apheori (GM): Indeed.
Would Gravy go to bed or something?
Alternately... I dunno.
You guys sort out how you're handinling this.
Ellemerr: He could go on being completely silent.
Doing the thinking thing. Gan has a picture.
Ganelon: Oh yes.
Apheori (GM): He's a good thinker.
Ganelon: http://www.artofmtg.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/04/Pensive-Minotaur-Art.jpg
But in this continuity he's not a minotaur, sadly.
Gaurav: I'm going to be completely missing next week, so we should probably just power on through people's missing times. Otherwise we're going to have to stop a lot.
Oh, and you can keep going after two hours. Rhu can be wandering around behind you all with his new favourite mask.
Apheori (GM): Well, Radek found you all something to do.
Ganelon: Indeed, though we've got a day before we can do it. Or at least the remainder of one.
Radek himself is probably just going to work on the "fix holes without giving myself a nightmarish migraine" problem until then.
Gaurav: We should sleep at some point. Especially Gravy, if he really did use a Daily just then with the bard.
Ganelon: Daily item power. It's not nearly as big of a deal.
Gaurav: We could camp outdoors. Gives us a chance for random encounters and suchlike.
Ganelon: In fact, Radek's an artificer so he can recharge those for people.
Apheori (GM): You hear a bit of a screeching from outside.
Gaurav: Oh, okay!
Apheori (GM): In relation to the bard.
Gaurav: Do we have anything else we need to do in this town? We could just walk around and see if something comes up.
Bear Soup Guy: I'm sure there's something we need information about
Ganelon: The bard!
Wait, is this just his usual screeching or is he a zombie now?
I mean, we should probably shut him up regardless, but it's important to know.
Apheori (GM): Probably the usual.
Gaurav: BSG: I'd still like to know where we are. Actually, I'd still like a beer, so ...
Rhu approaches the bar again
Rhu:
rolling d20
(
2
)
=
2
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You have a beer. You just need to successfully pick it up.
Also you walk through the bar.
The barkeep backs away.
Rhu apologizes profusely to the barkeep, and accidentally ends up on the wrong side of the bar.
Rhu: Er, I'll just ...
Bear Soup Guy: "I think you've had enough"
Radek: Rhu, what...
Gaurav: BSG: XD
Rhu is looking very embarrassed now.
Radek: No, never mind. You can actually cause less damage this way.
Carry on.
Ganelon: I have a strong suspicion that he'll prove Radek wrong.
Rhu tries to poke at the bar with one finger, then turns to grin sheepishly at the barkeep before trying to walk out through the bar again.
Apheori (GM): Quite likely.
Rhu:
rolling d20
(
1
)
=
1
Gaurav: oh YEAH
Apheori (GM): Rhu: This time you fall through the floor.
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Gaurav: May I wave my arms frantically as I disappear through the floor?
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Rhu: He--
Rhu vanishes through the floor, arms flailing wildly.
Ellemerr: Spilling beer everywhere?
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You're in some sort of basement. It's kind of nightmarish. There are weird vials and tanks and stuff. Grotesque things poke out of walls.
He spills beer everywhere.
Rhu: No wait
rolling d20+10 acrobatics check to catch all the beer in my glass as I fall
(
15
)
+10
=
25
Apheori (GM): Meanwhile the barkeep says, "Um..."
Rhu:
rolling d20+10 acrobatics check to land on my feet
(
11
)
+10
=
21
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You catch some of the beer, except then you realise you're no longer holding the glass.
So it's all in your hand.
You land on your feet. They're very hairy.
Hairy muppet feet.
Rhu: Um.
Um.
Okay.
Rhu ignores the feet for now, and stares about the basement he's in.
Rhu:
rolling d20+14 perception check
(
17
)
+14
=
31
Apheori (GM): The rest of you: The barkeep asks y'all if Rhu is perhaps a bit... touched?
Gaurav: When you say it's all in my hand ...
Apheori (GM): I mean you're holding a glass of beer except there's no glass.
Bear Soup Guy: He's got the whoooooooole beer, in his hands
Gaurav: BSG: HA!
Greibel: (to Barkeep) Touched...By An Angel?
Apheori (GM): The basement is really hairy. And weird. And full of strange experiments. It's like a neightmare.
Amadi: (to barkeep) Yeah. Tentacles. Hazz - I mean, [says this world's name for him].
Apheori (GM): The barkeep asks where angels usually touch people.
(Vitoi)
Radek: In the brain, clearly.
Gaurav: He pulls out a doll from behind the counter.
Ellemerr: I totally knew that. *shifty eyes*
Apheori (GM): The barkeep looks concerned and asks if he needs to expect any more of this.
Radek: ...For as long as we're here, yes.
Gaurav: That ingrate. We cleared his bar of bards, didn't we? What's a little walking-through-walls between friends?
Radek: Well, I say "we".
Apheori (GM): He says, "Oh dear."
Rhu quietly looks around for staircases or any means of possibly getting back upstairs from this basement.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You see a strange kind of chute you might be able to climb up.
Gaurav: Any doors?
Ganelon: Beware the chute.
Apheori (GM): None recognisable as doors.
Ganelon: It may be waste disposal.
Apheori (GM): Some... strange membranes.
Gaurav: "chute" is a really rude word in Hindi
ooo, membranes
Apheori (GM): A sort of mesh screen looking out on utter lackness.
blackness*
A bowl of noodles sitting in the middle of the floor.
Rhu takes his mask on and off to see if that helps him see things better/brighter/less.
Apheori (GM): You notice something snake out of the floor and grab a noodle.
Rhu: Well fuck.
(under his breath)
Apheori (GM): With the mask off, everything is just a horrible white.
Gaurav: White?!
Apheori (GM): White.
Gaurav: That might actually be preferable, given things snaking through the floor and all.
rolling d20+9 nature check to see if I can identify the snakelike thing
(
16
)
+9
=
25
rolling d20+5 stealth on over to the chute
(
13
)
+5
=
18
Apheori (GM): It appears to have been a piece of floor.
MAsk on or off?
Gaurav: Mask on.
Apheori (GM): The floor seems to move away as you walk (as a texture, it stays level), and you get to the chute.
It's like ripples in a hairy carpet.
Snakey ripples.
Hairy snakey ripples.
Gaurav: I take it Baileys and blueberry syrup is really something, huh?
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Apheori (GM): Doesn't go very well together.
Baileys is better with baileys, frankly.
Gaurav: Creamy, beige. What's not to like?
Rhu:
rolling d20+10 acrobatics to climb up the chute
(
9
)
+10
=
19
Apheori (GM): The syrup is better with mountain dew.
Rhu:
rolling d20+5 stealth to do it stealthily
(
18
)
+5
=
23
Apheori (GM): Rhu gets partway up, falls partway down, and makes a muffled clatter.
Rhu sits quietly until he's sure there's no response to the clatter, then tries again.
Rhu:
rolling d20+10 acrobatics up
(
4
)
+10
=
14
Gaurav: oh ffs
Apheori (GM): You don't get very far.
Rhu looks up to see if there's any light at the top of the chute. "Hello?", he whispers, "Is someone up there?"
Apheori (GM): Do the rest of you want to do anything?
Ganelon: Er...
Apheori (GM): Rhu: Silence. Then, in a long low whisper, "Rhuuuu..."
Bear Soup Guy: Do we hear him calling?
Apheori (GM): Nope.
Bear Soup Guy: I assume we're all just thinking "Oh, Rhu's in trouble again. He'll show up in a couple hours."
Apheori (GM): XD
Gaurav rolls eyes
Gaurav: This is what comes from accepting masks from godlings. Let that be a lesson to you, kids.
Rhu will NOT respond to the voice, but will try to determine which direction it's coming from.
Ganelon: Radek will stay in the tavern so long as it's a relatively orderly place to sit down and think about complex theorems.
Rhu:
rolling d20+14 perception check on the voice
(
20
)
+14
=
34
Gaurav: yay!
Ganelon: It's as good a place as any, especially if he's waiting on Rhu to come back.
Ellemerr: ... You sure that's a good thing to roll high on? :P
Apheori (GM): The voice is being projected from above the shoot, but it's not actually coming from there. You don't know where it's coming from.
You feel a strong urge to remove the mask.
Gaurav: I'm kinda hoping that Rhu can go all "hmm, that slightly thick edge to an otherwise normal Thoraci accent tells me that you are male, elf, 23-25 years old, with brown hair and carrying two weapons, injured in the knee in Afghanistan ..."
RESIST URGE
Apheori (GM): Gan: The tavern is orderly and fairly quiet. it's like folks are just basking in the quiet.
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Gaurav: Gravy is wandering around taking people's measurements "just in case".
Apheori (GM): Oh, details about the voice itself, eh? It's low and sweet, like a fungus that eats flies. That's what it reminds you of. Except these flies are horrible and huge, and the fungus is actually something else entirely.
I like that. Since Frezak had to go, let's say Gravy really is doing that.
Gaurav: Like treacle.
Apheori (GM): Folks in tavern: Sometimes you hear an odd screetch from the bard outside.
Amadi: It sounds oddly familiar.
Ellemerr: What, the bard?
Ganelon: This tavern is just waiting to explode into conflict.
Apheori (GM): Yeah.
Ellemerr: Okay, I can check on the bard.
Ganelon: But I will savor the momentary peace and sit down to think.
Fist-on-chin hardcore PONDERING.
Apheori (GM): Amadi: You need to take Greibel with you.
Ganelon: Well, more like fist-inside-beard.
Apheori (GM): PONDERING.
Do you ponder anything in particular today?
Gaurav: Some day we will know the quiet peace of a pipe and a pleasant conversation in a sun-lit bar by a mountain, but today is not that day.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: What do you do?
Gaurav: Are you pondering what I'm pondering?
Amadi takes Greibel's hand and attempts to walk him outside without giving any explenation for her actions.
Gaurav: omigosh there is a list: https://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Pinky_and_the_Brain#Are_You_Pondering_What_I.27m_Pondering.3F
Greibel tags along exasperatedly
Apheori (GM): Amadi and Greibel: You go to the bard. He's standing in a deep grave screetching like a harpy. There's supposed to be a tune there.
Rhu sits quietly in the chute, his eyes flicking first upwards and then quickly around the room, waiting to see what happens next.
Apheori (GM): Amadi: Do you sing the song the tune would go to? Greibel: Do you recognise it too?
Greibel, Amadi: Either of you, feel free to make up what it is.
Gaurav: This is what comes of racist music making, racist music man.
brb
Apheori (GM): Rhu: Nothing happens.
Ellemerr juggles bananas.
Apheori (GM): A wall oozes a bit.
Ellemerr: Sorry. *shifty eyes*
Apheori (GM): BANANAS.
You know what you get when you juggle bananas?
Ellemerr: I do.
Amadi juggles bananas.
Ellemerr: I mean...
"No, what do you get when you juggle bananas?"
Greibel sings: "My name is Lon Chaney / I was in some movies / You probably remember me for my hideous face..."
Apheori (GM): Greibel suddenly turns into a gorilla.
Greibel: RAAAAAAAAR
Ganelon: "Do you ponder anything in particular today?"
Sorry, missed this.
Apheori (GM): This messes up the singing slightly.
Ganelon: Yes, Radek ponders what he's been pondering for the last few days. How to close a hole.
Apheori (GM): Roll arcana.
Ganelon: Something about three pieces and a lock, as I recall.
rolling 1d20+12
(
6
)
+12
=
18
Amadi also sings the whole circus music bit that's supposed to go with this.
Amadi: (It includes a lot of trumpets and stuff.)
Greibel twirls hula hoops as a gorilla while singing
Apheori (GM): The shrieking bard shrinks into the hole and becoms horribly silent.
Ellemerr: Your wearing a pink tutu, too. I mean, the gorilla is.
Apheori (GM): Gan: Aiight, thanks.
Bear Soup Guy: Of course
Ganelon: Sorry, I have like three people talking to me on Skype while this is going on.
Apheori (GM): Ach. >.<
Ellemerr: And I need to brb.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: d20, please.
Bear Soup Guy: Sorry, I had to go clean up cat puke as well
rolling 1d20
(
7
)
=
7
Apheori (GM): Eww.
Okay.
Apheori (GM) curls up in bed with a bottle of baileys.
Ellemerr: Right. I'm back. Probably. Sort of.
Gaurav: Me too! Except more so.
Apheori (GM): Would you like to do anything else with the bard?
Ellemerr: I have no idea. Sorry.
Gaurav quietly, stealthily, Rhu tries to climb up the chute again.
Apheori (GM): Amadi: Eat his brain, give him a sense of music, ignore him, take his story, have him dance with the gorrilla?
Gaurav: Give him a sense of music++
Apheori (GM): Rhu: acrobatics
Rhu:
rolling d20+10 acrobatics check to climb the chute
(
6
)
+10
=
16
Apheori (GM): Rhu: It's getting cloooser.
Rhu:
rolling d20+5 stealth to do it quietly
(
4
)
+5
=
9
Gaurav: Ooo.
Apheori (GM): Your climbingattempts fail, and whatever it is hears you. You feel it.
Rhu freezes.
Apheori (GM): In your KIDNEYS.
Rhu pauses mid-freeze, looking confused.
Apheori (GM): Yes, alien elves have kidneys.
Gaurav: Then why haven't we had to go to the toilet for the last three weeks?
Apheori (GM): Because you have good kidneys.
Ellemerr: Snrk.
Gaurav: Oh.
Apheori (GM): Also because it's just gotten left out of the story when you did usually.
Amadi throws the bananas at the bard.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You finish the song and can stop being a gorilla if you want.
Up to you.
Gaurav: We went in to cover our feet from time to time.
Apheori (GM): The bard is hit by bananas and flinches away horribly.
Greibel goes back to normal, accompanied by a popping sound
Ganelon: Bananas! Hsssss~!
Gaurav: Did Rhu's last climbing attempt help him make any progress, or is he still at the bottom of the chute?
Apheori (GM): He's partway up.
Gaurav: And the voice appears to be coming DOWN the chute towards me?
Apheori (GM): Yup.
Gaurav: Can I see any sort of opening yet?
Apheori (GM): Nope.
Gaurav: Okay. Then Rhu climbs back down and steps quietly out of the chute.
rolling d20+10 acrobatics
(
13
)
+10
=
23
rolling d20+5 stealth
(
14
)
+5
=
19
I gotta leave in about an hour btw.
Apheori (GM): Rhu finally manages to climb up the chute.
Gaurav: Er.
Apheori (GM): And comes out in another room shaped like the tavern, but which is definitely not the tavern he left.
Gaurav: He was trying to climb down that last time.
But I guess he might have changed his mind?
Apheori (GM): Oh, you idn't need to roll for that.
Sorry, you're back in the basement.
Everythng is hairy.
Gaurav: "Everythng is hairy." should be the official motto of this game. And it looks like Frezak is back?
Is there anything in the basement I can hide behind if a sinister being comes down the chute after me?
Apheori (GM): Frezak is hairy.
Some desks, a strange... thing...
Frezak (GM): Not really, I shaved.
Gaurav: describe thing
Apheori (GM): Shaved EVERYTHING?
Gaurav: Or just the yak?
Frezak (GM): As far as you know.
Apheori (GM): Thing is vaguely cylindrical with some angles and a prism shape at the top. There are some glowing bits.
IT looks a bit organic.
Gaurav: Hmm.
I'm going to go hide behind the desk and see what happens.
Apheori (GM): And it's hairy.
Rhu hides behind the hairy desk.
The hairy desk blinks at Rhu and looks vaguely surprised.
Rhu: (to the desk) Shh. (puts one finger to his lips)
Gaurav: How does a desk blink?
Apheori (GM): The desk opens a few more eyes and those blink at his finger as well.
Frezak (GM): A GORILLA?
Ellemerr: Yeah. Sue me.
Ganelon: This whole situation has turned quite hairy.
Apheori (GM): >.<
Ganelon: We're going to need a rugged hero to pull through on this one.
Gaurav crouches behind the desk on the side away from the chute and waits, listening intently.
Rhu:
rolling d20+14 perception
(
9
)
+14
=
23
Apheori (GM): d20
Gaurav: That's all Rhu is going to do for the next 10-15m, so if you guys want to go do something else ...
Rhu:
rolling d20
(
7
)
=
7
Gaurav: Um.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Rhu hears whispers. Some are saying his name. Others... other things. It sounds like they've found something. Lost other things. Having lunch. Very sinister.
Left-handed.
Frezak (GM): WHere's Gravy?
Ganelon gasps in horror.
Apheori (GM): Gravy is in the tavern with Radek.
Ganelon: You and I are still- yeah.
Radek is doing some fist-to-chin hardcore pondering about holes.
We did witness Rhu start passing through solid objects, and then the floor.
This might have been Amadi's fault, but then, that isn't saying a lot.
Apheori (GM): She did give him a mask.
Gaurav: Are the voices coming from the chute as well?
Apheori (GM): It's messing with his depth-perception. In perhaps a few too many dimensions.
The voices are mostly coming from the black beyond the mesh latice, and from behind some walls/membranes.
Rhu: (whispers, to the desk) Do you hear that too?
Bear Soup Guy: XD
I love this game
Apheori (GM): The desk rumbles and opens a few more eyes.
It's somewhat covered in eyes now.
Gaurav: A small drawer slides open, revealing pencils, erasers, two paper clips, three eyes and a pair of lips.
Apheori (GM): Rhu's still hiding?
Rhu gives the desk a knowing glance in whichever eye is closest to him and does the "shh" hand gesture again. He goes back to listening quietly.
Apheori (GM): The eyes all follow the movement of the gesture intently.
Gaurav: When you say "hairy" ...
Apheori (GM): Everything is covered in hair.
Including the eyes.
Gaurav: Do you mean furry, short human hair, or long(er) human hair?
Gaurav screams
Apheori (GM): It's like fur, but all at exact right angles to the surface, unless it collides with other bits.
Gaurav: Or like bacterial cilia?
Heh cool
Is it coloured?
Apheori (GM): It's the same colour as whatever it's coming off.
Gaurav: Is it undulating? Is there a wind?
Apheori (GM): It normally stays still.
Sometimes bits pass through the floor, and it all moves like wind is pushing it...
Sometimes those bits eat noodles out of the bowl.
Gaurav: Ooo, nice.
Yeah, Rhu goes back to listening and waiting.
Apheori (GM): Gravy: Do you care that everyone besides Radek is missing?
You know Greibel and Amadi just went outside.
Ganelon: "Roll Charisma to care. +2 alignment bonus."
Gaurav: What time of day is it, btw?
Apheori (GM): I guess evening.
Gaurav: I'm imagining afternoon, but I might be wrong.
Ah thanks.
Apheori (GM): Early evening, then.
Gaurav: Somebody do something, or Rhu is going to get back to hogging all the attention.
go*
Frezak (GM): Not really.
Gravy has come to terms that all kinds of shit happens regardless of his desires or actions.
Might as well have a shirt that says 'Fukkit"
Ganelon: I don't mind Rhu hogging the attention, especially since I'm quite busy elsewhere.
And it does make sense that Radek is trying to puzzle out holes.
He just promised to fix one tomorrow.
Apheori (GM): Radek: Gimme another arcana.
Amadi, Greibel: Now what?
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+12
(
19
)
+12
=
31
Haha!
Ellemerr: Dancing?
Ganelon: Or perhaps I should say "Eureka!"
Bear Soup Guy: Dancing!
Ellemerr: Dancing, then.
Apheori (GM): Radek: So the question, perhaps, is pieces of what? What does it take to close a hole, really? And for that matter, what does it take to open one? The question to one should be the answer to the other...
Of course, if you could just make a lack of hole, something with no hole at all, well, wouldn't that be great?
Or something.
Ganelon: I'm not about to discount the possibility.
Gaurav: Can we learn anything from Gravy's monster that fought with the thing that came from the Hole?
Ganelon: "Behold! I have created... stuff!"
Apheori (GM): Point is, it's progress!
Stuff!
Ganelon: "It is the opposite of a hole in every conceivable way!"
Apheori (GM): "It looks like... normal stuff."
Amadi, Greibel: The porridge dances with you.
Gaurav: Is it just me, or have the Holes always appeared near trees?
Ganelon: *Scoffs*
"This 'normal stuff' is exactly what we need to eliminate the holes on a conceptual level."
"They will cease to be holes. They will cease to be anything, unless I apply an excess of stuff."
Apheori (GM): "And then they'll be stuff!"
"Right?"
Gravy: Can they learn anything from you... you mean the codrichun thing, right, Gaurav?
Ganelon: "No, don't be ridiculous. Then we'll end up with a gravitational singularity that will atomize this entire planet."
Apheori (GM): "I want it by tuesday."
Gaurav: I do! The Codrichun thing.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: As you sit there listening, another desk and a chair also open several eyes and watch you.
Gaurav: A planet is a small price to pay for stability.
Apheori (GM): Hairy eyes.
Frezak (GM): I don't understand what I'm being asked.
Gaurav: Is the chair comfortable?
I mean, does it look comfortable.
Apheori (GM): It's a hairy chair full of eyeballs.
Frezak: I think they want to know if it discovered anything, or can tell you.
Frezak (GM): Gods no.
Gaurav: Okay, I'm going to say 15 minutes have elapsed since I hit behind the desk. I guess there haven't been any left-handed voices from the chute?
Apheori (GM): That voice hasn't come back, no.
Gaurav: Maybe the monster was some kind of super zombie?
Frezak (GM): I can't talk to Codrichun, and all it does is just endlessly try to crawl out the Abyss.
It doesn't go around doing things.
Ganelon: Codrichun, I think, isn't related to the holes beyond a shared appetite for... everything.
Frezak (GM): Or conversing or communicating to anything.
Rhu gets out from behind the desk and walks around the room, looking closely for doors or any other way out of here.
Frezak (GM): EH, he doesn't have appetite.
Apheori (GM): Aiight.
Rhu:
rolling d20+14 perception
(
8
)
+14
=
22
Ganelon: But you're summoning his hunger!
Apheori (GM): Rhu notices nothing new, but the membranes might be openable... or cutable.
Gaurav: Does this mean that the monster was definitely "something", and not, say, the Hole manifesting itself in some way.
Unless the Hole is also "something".
Frezak (GM): No, not hunger.
I'm summoning an aspect of something that wants destruction.
Apheori (GM): Which monster?
I thought we were talking about codrichun.
Gaurav: The thing Codrichun fought with.
Apheori (GM): That was... something else.
Ganelon: We were in the realm of the gods.
Could have been a lot of things
Rhu tries to separate the membranes with my fingers to see if it responds to touch, and to see what's underneath them.
Gaurav: How much light is there in this basement with the mask on?
Apheori (GM): There's light everywhere, but it's not a whole lot.
On the other hand, everything kind oflooks the same with the mask on.
In terms of lighting.
Rhu: The membrane peels away under your nails or something and you poke a finger through.
Gaurav: Ooo. What's under the membrane?
Ganelon: Typically? Bad stuff.
Frezak (GM): "realm" suggests organisation.
Apheori (GM): You don't feel anything under it, just empty space. Do you make the hole bigger and look through?
Gaurav: Yes!
Apheori (GM): YOU MAKE A HOLE AND LOOK INTO...
Another room very much like the one you're in.
A wall eyes you.
Gaurav: As long as Rhu doesn't eye me.
I stick two fingers into the hole and try to make it bigger.
Ganelon: Oh, oh, there's a scene for this.
Even if these are probably awful fleshy membranes rather than what I'm thinking.
Gaurav: http://content.time.com/time/covers/0,16641,20040920,00.html is what I'm thinking of. But with fingers.
Ganelon: I suppose you haven't likely watched Titan A.E., have you?
Apheori (GM): Roll strength to rip huge hole.
Gaurav: I might have? I'm not sure.
eeks
Rhu:
rolling d20+2 strength
(
13
)
+2
=
15
Gaurav: I'm going to be gentle though.
I don't want to hurt the membranes.
Especially if I'm *inside* whoever these membranes belong to.
Apheori (GM): You ripe a medium-sized hole which you might be able to fit through if you tried.
More eyes in the wall watch you curiously.
Something licks your food.
foot*
Gaurav:
rolling d20+10 acrobatics to squeeze through the hole
(
17
)
+10
=
27
I ignore the footlicking.
Apheori (GM): You squeeze through the hole.
The room grins at you with teeth.
Grins opening up in rows of teeth spiraling up into the ceiling.
Rhu: Um.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: D20
Rhu tries to squeeze back through the hole into the room I came from.
Rhu:
rolling d20
(
5
)
=
5
Apheori (GM): Acrobatics to squeeze.
Rhu:
rolling d20+10 acrobatics to squeeze
(
17
)
+10
=
27
+1 terror
Apheori (GM): Everything feels kind of weird and you wind up going too far and trip over a desk.
The floor licks you.
Gaurav: Was .. was the room I just entered hairy as well?
Hairy teeth?
Apheori (GM): EVERYTHING is hairy.
Teeth.
Gaurav: Okay phew.
Apheori (GM): Eyeballs.
Your own feet.
Gaurav: My hands?
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Gaurav: Okay. Also phew.
Fine. So. Teeth in the next room. Okay.
I'll try the stretching-the-membranes thing on another wall.
rolling d20+2 strength attack
(
1
)
+2
=
3
Apheori (GM): The one seems to have something behind it. You can't get through.
Whispers ask for lettuce.
Rhu: (to the nearest eye) What's behind here?
I'll try to get through again if I may.
Apheori (GM): The eye blinks at you.
Gaurav:
rolling d20+2 strength check
(
18
)
+2
=
20
"The eye winks leeringly"
I've gotta go in about 10 mins
but this has been AWESOME
Apheori (GM): You clear away the membrane and are faced with an enormous eye.
Gaurav: How enormous?
Rhu waves at the eye
Apheori (GM): Kind of enormous
.
The eye stares at you.
Gaurav: A little uncertainly
Rhu: Hi. Were you the one asking me for lettuce just now?
Apheori (GM): The eye continues to stare at you.
Rhu checks for eyelids
Gaurav: What colour is the iris? Does it look like an elf or human or animal eye?
Ganelon: I'm going to take two guesses.
1. Cat
2. Goat
Apheori (GM): It's red, but like a toad.
And hairy.
Ganelon: That's a good kind of eye too.
Very groovy.
Gaurav: The definitive guide to animal eye shapes: http://www.koryoswrites.com/nonfiction/the-functions-of-different-pupil-shapes/
If I step away from the membranes, will they close?
Can I shove the chair in between to keep them open?
Apheori (GM): You ripped holes in them. They sort of dangle sadly.
Gaurav: Okay. Um.
Are you guys going to keep on playing? If so, Rhu could go to sleep or keep futilely getting out of this membrane basement room place thing.
Ganelon: Good question.
Ellemerr: I'm, er, dancing.
Gaurav: I gotta run, so I'll let you all decide. If Rhu falls asleep, he'll sit beside the hole, wait for the sinister voice to reappear, but fall asleep in the waiting. If he keeps trying things ... then yeah, he does that, and Apheori and I can work them out before next time.
I'm out of town from Sunday through Friday next week, so I can join in on Saturday or not at all.
Thanks for a REALLY FUN game today everybody, and see you all in a couple of weeks!
Bear Soup Guy: Bye Gaur!
Apheori (GM): Aiight, I'ma go stare off into space.
Unless someone particularly wants me to do something else.
Bear Soup Guy: I'm okay with ending, it's been a good session
Ganelon: Yeah.
I got a nice chat in with George and that's all I was really expecting.
It was nice to set up a future goal too.
Bear Soup Guy: Should we try to do a session sometime while Gaur is away or try Saturday?
Apheori (GM): Can everyone do saturday?
Ganelon: Same start time?
As long as it isn't a particularly drawn out session, yeah. Not because I have plans in the evening but because I'll be getting really tired.
Bear Soup Guy: Yeah I'll likely be able to do a morning session
Gaurav: Is that this Saturday or next Saturday?
I'd rather not this Saturday, but if everybody else wants to ... I can definitely do next Saturday.
Bear Soup Guy: Next Saturday then?
Or just next Sunday I guess
Gaurav: oh right. that's fine too.
Apheori (GM): SATURDAY OR SUNDAY?
Gaurav: Sunday Sunday Sunday!
This is September 21, right?
Bear Soup Guy: Yep!
Gaurav: Yay! I will see you all then.
Bear Soup Guy: Right, bye all!

Session 33

Apheori (GM): Okay, now will this work?
Y'all can see this, yes?
Gaurav: Yes!
Apheori (GM): Right, so.
Y'all are in a tavern. It's afternoon or evening or something. You have someone to meet tomorrow, but for now you're just... what, waiting? Getting drunk? Daring Greibel to smoke random things, or better yet, trying to get Gravy to do it?
Amadi and Greibel were dancing.
Apparently.
And Rhu... you're still in a horrible nightmare world.
Gaurav: Yay!
Wait.
Were they dancing with each other? Is everybody still outside?
Ganelon: Radek is having no part in your dancing.
Nor getting drunk. It's pretty boring, but he's probably just pondering and tinkering with his 'bots.
Apheori (GM): Radek was pondering, but I think he's all pondered out for the day.
BOTS.
Ganelon: Unless someone wants a thing made magical.
He can do that.
Gaurav: Anybody in the inn chatting about this whole zombies-destroying-everything thing? Or even just the destruction of their guardhouse by a bunch of out-of-town people?
Ganelon: Well, we might be out-of-town, but everyone in charge mistook me for some sort of CSI.
And not wanting to deny myself the privilege of being able to boss them around, I just played along.
Apheori (GM): Well, more folks are probably starting to come into the inn around now.
Because I'm just arbitrarily declaring it evening.
Radek: This place had better not have karaoke nights...
Apheori (GM): So yeah, some noticed the... whatever visible signs there are. And the lack of guards.
Mostly the lack of guards. A lot of bad jokes about that.
Ganelon: He won't bother to explain things to them because:
1. It would take considerable effort to make them understand.
2. They would not likely be able to contribute to the problem's resolution.
3. Starting a panic would be bad, I guess.
Apheori (GM): Speaking of panic...
Rhu: d20
Gaurav:
rolling d20
(
15
)
=
15
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Um.
What does everyone do?
Rhu takes his mask off to check if he can still hear the creepy voices without it on
Apheori (GM): Still hear. Can't see anything, though.
Roll perception.
Ganelon: Rhu's still doing stuff of importance, right now I'm browsing magic items.
Is Frezak even seeing any of this?
Apheori (GM): Going mad is importat.
Frezak is probably dead.
Rhu:
rolling d20+14 perception check
(
4
)
+14
=
18
Apheori (GM): Amadi will thus dress up his character as Old Gregg, complete with extra lipstick.
Gaurav: o.0
Apheori (GM): Rhu: Things feel relatively normal. When you don't look at them. What 'normal' actually is you don't know.
Gaurav: How do you mean, "feel"?
Ganelon: Oh. Of course!
Apheori (GM): With hands. Air? Smell. A general... uh... you have no idea. It just feels.
FEEEELS.
Ganelon: Radek spends an hour to make...
HEDGE WIZARD'S GLOVES.
Bear Soup Guy: This is no time for gardening!
Frezak (GM): I arrive to see that Gan is doing the right thing.
Carry on, Gan.
Ganelon: I can make a second pair if you want.
I have enough dust for two.
Gaurav: I guess I meant: do the walls feel like normal walls, or do they still feel hairy and membranous, except now Rhu feels that this is "normal" somehow?
Frezak (GM): I don't think Gravy would be any good with 'em
Apheori (GM): Frezak: You've been dressed up as Old Gregg, unless you object.
Do you object? Forcefully?
Frezak (GM): I do object.
Apheori (GM): Okay. Then Amadi is dressed up as Old Gregg and leering at you.
Frezak (GM): I have no idea what that is.
Ganelon: So this costs 840 whatevers of dust.
Gaurav: So: they're both dressed up as Old Gregg now?
Apheori (GM): Just Amadi.
Frezak (GM): 840 Squots.
Slightly less than a.. KiloSquot.
Ganelon: The gloves allow their wearer to use two wizard cantrips - one makes hands that can carry small objects and manipulate things, the other is Prestidigitation and does everything.
Apheori (GM): Piles. It's the standard fantastical parlance. Piles of dust.
Ganelon: Except, if you real the rules as written, anything that can be done by anything else.
Apheori (GM): Anything else can do anything.
If anything is everything in this context. Alternatively.
Ganelon: Yeah, so you should probably interpret the rules more favorably.
Frezak (GM): Well, anything that can be done by 'powers'
Gaurav: Gan: woo! That sounds pretty awesome and useful.
Frezak (GM): And there are many things not covered by powers.
Apheori (GM): If there isn't a designated power for something, you'll be rolling a sanity check to see if it actually works. How does that sound?
So you can try anything at all...
But it may explode!
Frezak (GM): CAN YOUR GLOVES DIG HOLES?
Rhu takes out any scrap of cloth he can -- or uses a sleeve of whatever he's wearing if he's got nothing -- and tries to wipe the eye gently.
Ganelon: It can:
- Change colours of, clean, soil, chill, warm, or flavour 1 ft cubed of matter...
Frezak (GM): Much hinges on this.
Apheori (GM): Does Rhu have the mask on?
Ganelon: - Create a small image or item that vanishes a few seconds later
- Make a small handheld item invisible for a likewise brief period.
Gaurav: Oh yes sorry.
Ganelon: - Light or extinguish... light sources. Campfires are mentioned.
Rhu puts the mask back on before rubbing the eye &c.
Ganelon: And create harmless sensory effects.
Basically, they are the best gloves for fucking around you will ever wear.
Gaurav: "Flavour 1 ft cubed of matter" ... hmm.
Ganelon: Yep, I can make stone taste delicious to you.
Gaurav: We could turn the Hole into a lollipop and get Amadi to eat it.
Apheori (GM): DO IT.
Ganelon: I don't think that counts as matter.
So once he's done making them, obviously he has to test them out.
Apheori (GM): Do Greibel or Gravy do anything?
Frezak (GM): I don't think Gravy has anything to do.
Apheori (GM): There's other people around now. Amadi got you all baileys.
Though you're not sure HOW exactly.
Ganelon: What is a bailey?
Apheori (GM): Creamy whiskey. With, like, actual cream in it.
Frezak (GM): It's a... cream liqueur.
Gaurav: Baileys Irish Creme
Radek stares into the Bailey balefully. He doesn't /drink/. Literally.
Frezak (GM): Gravy will drink it for two reasons.
Because then Radek doesn't seem impolite for not drinking.
And because Gravy has inhuman constitution.
Radek: Hey, do you want that to taste like something else?
Literally anything.
The Gravedigger: Like?
The Gravedigger hmms.
Radek: The limit is... well, I suppose /my/ imagination.
The Gravedigger: Lemonade.
Chicken lemonade.
Gaurav: o.0
The Gravedigger: Chickenade?
Gaurav: 0.0
The Gravedigger: Your imagination?
SO... wires and chrome?
That does not sound tasty.
Radek touches the glass with his gloves, and the Bailey takes on the flavour of his closest approximation to Chickenade.
Radek: ...Just try it. Let me know if I remember the sensation of taste correctly.
Amadi sits on the bar and giggles.
Gaurav: I suppose that's better than sitting in the bar and giggling.
Frezak (GM): WHAT IS IT LIKE
Ganelon: Amusingly, I don't see anything about Prestidigitation effects getting dismissed.
Frezak (GM): What, actively switched off?
Ganelon: You can have three active at a time, but the power makes no overt mention of deactivating one intentionally.
Frezak (GM): Hah.
Ganelon: So if you don't like your drink, you can request a different flavour... but not the original one unless Radek can duplicate that.
Apheori (GM): Radek: Roll something to get the chickenade right.
Radek:
rolling 1d20 Something
(
16
)
=
16
Apheori (GM): What do you think, would history be appropriate?
Ganelon: If it's history, that's a 23.
Gaurav: I'd say "Bartending", so ... Nature?
Ganelon: 20 if it's Nature or any other wisdom-based skill he's not trained in.
Apheori (GM): Let's just go with history because it's all ancient history to Radek.
Gravy!
The chickenade baileys tastes a bit like cream of lemon chicken soup. It is rather chickeny, and a bit fried-like.
The Gravedigger: Wow!
Bear Soup Guy shudders
Gaurav: Oh yum.
Would it still taste like Baileys at all? I don't imagine those tastes would go well together at all.
Ganelon: That's up to the DM.
Apheori (GM): Naw.
Just the texture.
Ganelon: In a less silly game, one of ours ruled that it only adds flavour rather than replacing.
Gaurav: Huh. Interesting.
Ganelon: Because we could very easily make poisons delicious, for instance. Or eat awful food and love it.
Apheori (GM): What's wrong with that?
Ganelon: Well, my character was carrying three doses of extremely lethal poison AT THE TIME.
Apheori (GM): If you have a good understanding of chemistry and the right chemicals on hand, you can do that anyway.
Just look at processed foods.
Ganelon: You mean like the stuff that people try to convince you is cheese despite not being legally able to use the word "cheese"?
Apheori (GM): For instance.
Ganelon: So you get names like "Processed Dairy Slices"?
Apheori (GM): Or even just stuff like 'fruit-flavoured' anything.
Or breakfast cereal.
Apheori (GM) shudders.
Ganelon: I'll try not to abuse this- okay no, I'm not fooling anyone.
You guys will be sucking on candy flavoured rocks within a day.
Frezak (GM): Uh-huh.
Gaurav: Rocks?
Apheori (GM): If you try something like that, they should do opposing perception checks or something.
Also this doesn't change the texture, so they won't be able to chew the rocks.
Gaurav: As long as you don't make us eat week-old sentient porridge, I'm not going to complain too much.
Apheori (GM): You could probabyl do a separate one to change the texture too, but...
Ganelon: Well.
I could make gum last forever.
Apheori (GM): I don't imagine you'll get much past Gravy's perception if you try anything obtuse.
Frezak (GM): Well, no, it would lose elasticity eventually.
Ganelon: You've got me there.
Gaurav: To be fair, as a group, we basically eat whatever Amadi hands us
so I'm not sure why we'd be more skeptical of Radek, especially since (1) he's the smart one, and (2) he could spin some "oh look strupenwaffles! These are delicious and have exactly the same texture as rocks" nonsense with a perfectly straight face.
Anyway, I'm still waiting to see what rubbing the eye with some cloth did.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: What eye are you rubbing?
Frezak (GM): Radek doesn't have the empathy to fuck with people.
Ganelon: Radek will sit content with the fact that that his memory of food is apparently still good enough.
This is what he's imagining, however:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IfPuQKTXaPA
For Frezak's web-impaired sake, it's the wizard rocking out. You've likely seen it before.
Gaurav: The forbidden arts of ... flavour changing?
Frezak (GM): Thank you, Gan.
Ganelon: He can produce small items too, Gaurav.
Although the bloody rules say you can't use them to "serve as a tool".
Which is again, such a vague and harsh restriction that I kinda hate 'em.
Gaurav: I vote we play without that restriction.
Apheori (GM): Does that mean mechanical tool?
Psychological tool?
Metaphorical tool?
Gaurav: Apheori: the eye I revealed by clawing at the wall. You described it as enormous and red like a toad's.
Apheori (GM): Oh. So you rub it with cloth?
Are you sure you want to rub a hairy eyeball with cloth?
Gaurav: Very gently. I'm trying to get its attention, and to see what sort of texture it has. Apart from hairy.
Oh, aaaand
if nothing happens, I'll try it again without the mask, to see how "normal" it feels.
Bear Soup Guy: Rhu really thinks pretty logically for a guy who keeps getting helplessly into trouble and worships an insane and malevolent God
Ganelon: You've gotta hold onto something in this crazy world.
Gaurav: Science is all I gots
Ganelon: Sci-five, Gaurav.
Apheori (GM): Well, it doesn't feel hairy at all. It feels wet and smooth and the cloth sticks to it and the pupil contracts and it tries to shrink away and then the entire place rumbles.
Ganelon: That all sounds rather bad.
Gaurav: Eh.
Like, side-to-side rumble or floor-giving-way/changing-topology rumble?
Apheori (GM): EVERYTHING RUMBLING.
Rhu supports himself again the membranous hairy walls
Rhu: Woah, hairy place ... woah ...
Apheori (GM): Something sticky and viscous drips on your head.
Rhu ignores it for now and continues trying to steady himself
Apheori (GM): Perception, please.
Frezak (GM): YOU SEE DOOM
Gaurav: Oh no, not doom! Anything but doom! Or Amadi dressed up as Old Gregg!
Rhu:
rolling d20+14 perception check
(
16
)
+14
=
30
Gaurav: yay, I see things!
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You also notice the voices behind the rumbling, getting louder and frantic and saying... well, you don't know what.
Were they saying anything before? I don't remember.
Gaurav: <<"Rhu hears whispers. Some are saying his name. Others... other things. It sounds like they've found something. Lost other things. Having lunch. Very sinister.
Left-handed."
>>
Apheori (GM): Ah, okay.
Gaurav: Left-handed hairy voices they were.
<<"Oh, details about the voice itself, eh? It's low and sweet, like a fungus that eats flies. That's what it reminds you of. Except these flies are horrible and huge, and the fungus is actually something else entirely.>>
Apheori (GM): Then the rumbling stops. The place is still. The walls ooze. More viscous stuff falls on your shoulder.
Rhu looks for an opening, glancing occasionally at the tunnel that he tried to climb through earlier to make sure it was still open.
Apheori (GM): The voices are still raised and worried and argumentative.
Perception!
Rhu:
rolling d20+14 perception
(
17
)
+14
=
31
Rhu gingerly pokes at the ooze on the wall -- I guess this is already on the hand he was using to steady himself
Apheori (GM): The ooze is dark and sticky and looks like it's covered in hair.
Rhu: Huh.
Gaurav: It's treacle, isn't it.
I'm stuck in a treacle well.
Apheori (GM): There does seem to be a crack in the other wall, though. A whole lot of ooze came our of that.
Gaurav: HA
HAAAAAAA
Rhu heads for the crack of ooze
Gaurav: It was great playing with you guys, and I hope whatever character I role next is less liable to fall into the digestive systems of basements.
Ganelon: That is a rather naive hope.
Gaurav: Fair enough.
Apheori (GM): What does Rhu do?
Rhu tries to enlarge the crack with his hands and look through
Apheori (GM): It looks like a passage has opened, though you don't know where to.
And you should be able to fit in.
Rhu steps through the crack
Apheori (GM): It's dark and sticky and furry.
You have to crawl to make progress.
Gaurav: Eeeeee
Rhu crawls
Apheori (GM): Great.
Rhu does that for awhile.
Unless he stops.
In which case he sits there.
Rhu stops occasionally to catch his breath, but otherwise keeps going.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Back to everyone else.
Gaurav: Is it warm in this tunnel?
Apheori (GM): It's both warm and cold.
Apheori (GM) waves a fish.
Ganelon: What's Greibel been up to?
Gaurav: Is he still dancing?
Bear Soup Guy: He's trying to perform a magic trick for a disinterested but polite bar patron
Gaurav: And what happened to that awful musician that someone (Gravy?) threw into a grave?
Bear Soup Guy: Amadi and Greibel scared him
Apheori (GM): The bar person is unhappy and yet wearing a very funny hat.
The musician is still in the grave. Occasionally you can hear his screeches.
Frezak (GM): Why are we still IN the bar?
Apheori (GM): Because you haven't left. Do you want to leave?
Greibel makes several flourishing motions before removing the patron's hat, setting it on the table, hitting it with a hammer, picking it back up, reaching inside, and pulling out the destroyed remains of three eggs
Ganelon: Got nowhere else to be, really.
Apheori (GM): It's also an inn, so they should have rooms.
Gaurav: Describe funny hat
Frezak (GM): What does Radek need to further work on the Holes Problem?
Apheori (GM): The patron looks at Greibel disgruntedly, takes the hat back, shakes it out, then realises it's got egg stuck to the inside.
Ganelon: Mostly a Hole and room for experimentation.
We'll get both tomorrow.
Greibel grins sheepishly
Frezak (GM): In that case...
Gravy will wander around the outskirts of town for zombies and herbs
Ganelon: I think... yes, tonight, he is going to explore the possibility of making his bomb an un-bomb.
Apheori (GM): The patron wipes it on his trousers and puts it back on.
Ganelon: That isn't to say it's an antimatter explosive (it could be already).
Apheori (GM): Gravy: You wander. It's getting darker and cooler and horrible bugs come out. You find some hallucinogens.
You hear some howling.
What's an unbomb to Radek?
Ganelon: In this case?
Something that can close holes and mend craters rather than create them.
Apheori (GM): How would it work?
Ganelon: He wants to see if it can create stuff rather than simply energy. Whatever stuff the environment lacks.
Apheori (GM): What operating principles is he exploring.
\
?
Gaurav: Where does the stuff come from? It is a direct energy->mass conversion or does it just suck it in from the surroundings?
Ganelon: The former.
Latter's no good, that's just a vaccuum.
Gaurav: It might still act as a clot of sorts.
Ganelon: Of course, a bomb that converts explosive energy into mass is fascinating enough on its own.
But in particular, we're talking about creating whatever is lacking that causes holes to appear.
Stuff on the most fundamental level. Reality.
Gaurav: Hmm, interesting. Somehow I imagined the holes more like ... necrosis. Like skin just tearing apart and then there's a gap. So I've been thinking about closing them in clotting/stitching metaphors.
Apheori (GM): Hmm.
Ganelon: That could be accurate. Of course, we're debating the metaphysical properties of a fictional world that may have never made sense to begin with.
Apheori (GM): So energy-based matter synthesis according to what should be in a space but isn't?
Eeeeegh, that's complicated.
Ganelon: The latter would most assuredly be reliant on magic.
Apheori (GM): Oh, it's all magic. And none.
But okay.
Ganelon: Oh, you know what I mean.
Energy to matter is theoretically possible to achieve through our understanding of modern science.
"What used to be here"... is more complicated.
Apheori (GM): Well, it should be doable, though Radek isn't going to be sure of all the component pieces at this point.
Ganelon: It's a thought exercise for him even if it's completely impossible.
Apheori (GM): But that's just it - it's not completely impossible.
It actually might be doable.
Ganelon: That just makes it even better.
Apheori (GM): Doable like the miniature Old Gregg sitting on the bar.
...it's singing.
About pickles.
Then it giggles and falls over backwards behind the bar.
Greibel probably hears the barkeep mutter something about how maybe they need a new bar.
Ganelon: But then we'd just loiter there instead.
What they really need is an exterminator.
To rid the place of godlings, adventurers, and other stubborn pests.
Apheori (GM): Well, that's the problem.
Gaurav: That'd be a fun D&D game: you play a guild of adventurer exterminators, constantly getting in the middle of other adventures and putting an end to all that nonsense.
Apheori (GM): Two people just disappeared through it.
XD
Ganelon: ...Gaurav, you're a genius.
I've /already/ got a workable character concept for such a game.
I'd play the healer.
The one role that nobody wants to play but every adventuring party wants.
Apheori (GM): I like playing healers.
Frezak (GM): COULD I BE TWIP
Apheori (GM): You can just ignore all the enemies. It's great.
Ganelon: Pffft.
Apheori, you have no idea what you're missing.
Sure, it can be nice to ignore the enemies.
Gaurav: They don't ignore you, though, is the thing. They know that once you're down the rest of the party can be safely killed.
Apheori (GM): I've played non-healers.
I'm just lazy.
Ganelon: But I have a character who does even better.
She makes the enemies useless and then ignores them.
Apheori (GM): And that is why I stay away from the party.
Gaurav: Gan: nice.
Apheori (GM): Seriously, that actually worked in pvp in gw - I'd just hide behind a rock and heal everyone. XD
You'd think other players would think of that.
Ganelon: D&D 4E has an astounding capacity for players being just... incredibly rude to the enemies they're fighting.
Apheori (GM): What, enemies can't be rude back?
Ganelon: They can.
Apheori (GM): Good.
Ganelon: Shadow Wolves are incredibly rude.
If you attack them in melee, they attack you first, blind you, and then jump out of range before you're allowed to hit. And if you're no longer in range, you don't get to hit.
Frezak (GM): Right, but in 4E a foe can't just shut down the party with one spell.
Ganelon: True.
Apheori (GM): Pfft.
Ganelon: They don't get Sleep.
Gaurav: Shadow wolves sound like fun.
Not as fun as Rhu about to get chased down a tunnel by Old Gregg, but ...
Ganelon: Oh gods, you're right.
Old Gregg is coming for him.
Apheori (GM): So... what now?
Rhu continues crawling through the tunnel
Ganelon: I assume that most everyone's going to sleep.
Except for Rhu.
He may never sleep again.
Gaurav: Oh right, I forgot that. Thanks for the reminder.
Didn't Gravy hear some howling?
Ganelon: Also Radek, but we've established what he's been up to overnight.
Gaurav: Was it just some chickens or something?
Ganelon: ...Yes, that's right.
Gaurav: Also it'd be cool if Greibel could commune with the local fauna and see if they've heard anything about the holes or zombies or squirrels
Frezak (GM): Howling chickens?
Bear Soup Guy: Are there animals in the bar?
Apheori (GM): Roll nature to see if the howling was chickens.
Not besides your party.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+10
(
13
)
+10
=
23
Apheori (GM): I mean...
Frezak (GM): Nature!
Apheori (GM): Actually the animals already left.
Frezak (GM): Also very slow rolls.
Apheori (GM): The thing takes a long time to roll?
Frezak (GM): I'll try again >.>
rolling 1D20+10
(
3
)
+10
=
13
It's the new Quantum Rolls.
Ganelon: His internet connection is being throttled.
Frezak (GM): They don't like my web speed.
Apheori (GM): >.<
Frezak (GM): Strangulated in a non-sexual manner!
Ganelon: I'll bet /gnolls/ are responsible.
Apheori (GM): I dunno, it may give them sexual gratification.
Frezak (GM): Fukken Gnolls!
Ganelon: Here, what's your bonus?
Frezak (GM): There we go.
Ganelon: Oh, there it is.
Frezak (GM): First one is the one that counts!
Apheori (GM): You don't think it's a chicken.
It sounds more like a moose.
Frezak (GM): So when WAS that?
Apheori (GM): What?
Frezak (GM): That I heard this beast.
Apheori (GM): Just now, I guess. You found a hallucinogenic plant and then heard a howl.
Frezak (GM): Do moose usually howl?
Apheori (GM): You don't think so.
Frezak (GM): I will carefully collect the plant and bring it to Greibel.
Whereupon I will wordless thrust it at him and go bother Radek.
Ganelon: Not that you need one, but is there a purpose to this bebotheration?
Apheori (GM): Gravy's the Warrior, Greibel is the Fool, Amadi is the Whore, Rhu is the Virgin, and Radek is the Scholar.
It all fits.
Frezak (GM): Yes.
Gravy is sure that Radek needs good old bothering to keep him grounded.
Gaurav: Hey!
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20+13 nature to inspect the hallucinogenic plant
(
10
)
+13
=
23
Apheori (GM): Unless Rhu is the Whore? Those two were a little fuzzy.
Ganelon: "Hey, Radek!"
"What!? I was just contemplating a process that could result in the destruction of all matter in the universe!"
"...You're welcome!"
Gaurav: Hee.
Rhu is definitely the Whore, if for no reason than that he's likely the first person killed.
Apheori (GM): Amadi seems more likely to pull a Katia than Rhu does.
Gaurav: And Amadi is the most likely to be alive at the end.
Apheori (GM): Pfft, fine.
Gaurav: Well, "alive"
Apheori (GM): Technically she's already dead.
Gaurav: Yes
And will probably be again
Such are the ways of godfragments
Apheori (GM): Greibel: The plant is indeed hallucinogenic, and also likely to be very, very stinky if smoked.
VERY stinking.
stinky
Frezak (GM): Actually.
I want to roll Arcana.
To say soemthing smart.
Apheori (GM): Do iiiit.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+3
(
18
)
+3
=
21
Oh man.
The Gravedigger: Have you considered that you're overlookign the resonant disharmony between planar frequencies?
Oooh, look at the shine on that shovel.
Radek does a double-take.
Radek: .../What/ did you just say?
Gaurav: Hahahahahaha
The Gravedigger: It's this polish.
Got it before this thing started, made from authentic materials!
Radek: No, no, before that.
Frezak (GM): Gan, I went into the Taint Zone to roll that.
Apheori (GM): I just read that in the voice of one of those tall but stupid aliens in Invader Zim.
Ganelon: Does that mean that Freya's heal checks are drawn from the Far Realm?
The Gravedigger: Oh, that.
The Gravedigger shrugs.
The Gravedigger: Well, I was wondering wether the Holes were a result of dissonance between planes, and were more like mass molecular gaps than actual holes.
I should drag that bard out.
Before he's eaten by moose.
Frezak (GM): I'll plod out and go drag the Bard out of the grave.
Ganelon: Let's see if I can roll an Arcana bad enough to be under that result.
Frezak (GM): I don't think you access to the Taint Zone, Gan.
Apheori (GM): The bard howls at you and then tries to hump your leg.
Radek:
rolling 1d20+12
(
20
)
+12
=
32
Ganelon: Damn.
You were saying?
Frezak (GM): Fuck you.
Fuck you and fuck your maker, Silicone Man.
Apheori (GM): Radek has an epiphany.
Something about the nature of holes, based on what Gravy was saying.
Radek stands up and ends up catching his beard on something.
Radek: That's- agh! THAT'S IT!
Frezak (GM): Leaving pieces of his POWER behind.
As in beard.
Radek: Gravedigger, you're promoted!
Apheori (GM): He was completely wrong about the dissonance, of course, but the thing is, they are gaps. And in gaps, there has to be something, even if it is nothing.
And magic invariably interacts with these things.
And THAT is what the problem with the magic was. It's not the doing spells badly that opens the holes. It's that there's something genuinely wrong with the magic itself here. Something eating at it. So far you only run into it when you bork a spell in a particular way, but it will only get worse in time. On a geological scale, that is. Perhaps astronomical. But eventually, all magic may do it. Any at all.
Whatever that something is, you need to find it.
And have Greibel smoke it.
Gaurav: 0.0
Bear Soup Guy: Naturally
Ganelon: Is that /really/ the conclusion Radek reaches?
Just to be absolutely certain.
Bear Soup Guy: Greibel has started smoking the weird stinky plant, by the way
Apheori (GM): Well, the having Greibel smoke it bit pops into his mind, but he may immediately disregard it as nonsense.
They rest of it, though, yes.
Ganelon: Shit, now I have to do something nice for the big guy.
Apheori (GM): The tavern is getting really stinky. People are making horrible faces and groaning in disgust.
Greibel continues puffing away, oblivious to the discomfort around him
Greibel blows smoke rings
Apheori (GM): Some of them are leaving.
Gaurav: Make it taste like lollipops, get Amadi to eat it, then Greibel smokes Amadi. The circle of dope.
The smoke rings eat through the walls.
Apheori (GM): The innkeep politely asks Greibel to leave.
Ganelon: Quickly, Frezak!
Name a magic item!
Frezak (GM): THE IMMOVABLE ROD
Ganelon: L5 or under, for both price and ritual restrictions.
Frezak (GM): Oh.
Greibel frowns slightly
Greibel walks out to smoke in the alley
Ganelon: You could have a Floating Lantern.
Apheori (GM): The inn still stinks after Greibel leaves.
Ganelon: That's pretty grave-diggy.
Apheori (GM): It appears everyone remaining has a crappy sense of smell or is too drunk to care, though.
Greibel: You run into the people who already left outside.
Radek deactivates his nose.
Ganelon: Problem solved.
Frezak (GM): Wavestrider boots?
Gaurav: Hee
Frezak (GM): Heee.
Amulet of Seduction.
Heee.
Apheori (GM): Most of the people quickly move away and then meander home.
The others just sort of move away.
They all look like bubbles.
Ganelon: Quite possibly my favourite low-level magic item is the Flagon of Ale Procurement.
Gaurav: ... bubbles?
Apheori (GM): Bubbles!
Everyone looks like bubbles to Greibel.
Ganelon: "Property: You know the direction and distance to the nearest alcoholic beverage."
Apheori (GM): Useful.
Maybe.
Greibel laughs
Ganelon: If you want 'em.
...
If you want it.
Gaurav: Can you use that to figure out how drunk someone is?
Ganelon: If their blood alcohol level is high enough? I don't see why not!
You /may/ need to consider drinking their blood to benefit from that, though.
Frezak (GM): I'll go with boots because then I will run across any liquid we ever find, for ever.
Ganelon: So be it!
Frezak (GM): Sweet!
Apheori (GM): Mmm, blood.
Ganelon: Radek takes an hour off to make Gravy a pair of awesome boots.
Frezak (GM): Combat-wise, Pouncing Armour.
But, eh.
You have tailoring?
Ganelon: Hell no, he robs some drunk of his fucking boots and uses magic to reshape and resize them.
Frezak (GM): Acceptable!
Ganelon: The latter is specifically a thing that the Enchant ritual can do.
"There is no component cost for this use."
Apheori (GM): So THAT's why Radek has thievery skills...
Frezak (GM): No, he's got that for alchemy.
Ganelon: It's also the skill you use for manual dexterity, yeah.
Apheori (GM): But also for actually robbing people.
Ganelon: You need training in it to make bombs.
And yes, to rob people of their mundane clothing.
Frezak (GM): Look, if you really needed boots I'm sure there's another way.
Apheori (GM): Why, does anyone in the party actually have morals?
Ganelon: Not this late at night, my friend.
Frezak (GM): I'm saying rolling a different D20 to get 'em.
Ganelon: Oh.
Yeah, probably.
Mage Hand is probably great for bootnapping.
But I guess... what, would Nature be the skill to craft them?
...Nah, probably a Martial Practice.
Gaurav: Rhu has morals!
Frezak (GM): yeah, it's a martial practice.
You're being digested by a cellar!
Gaurav: They're very annoying.
Frezak (GM): Your morals don't count!
Ganelon: Would Rhu honestly object to Radek stealing a drunkard's boots?
Gaurav: He'd look the other way.
Frezak (GM): We could bribe you in smiles.
Gaurav: If forced to, he'd probably explain them as definitely part of some complicated scheme to save the world that Radek just hasn't gotten around to explaining to us yet.
Frezak (GM): Or whatever radek can make that's closest to a smile.
Ganelon: It's a good thing Radek keeps himself too busy for /petty/ revenge or I'd be really worried about such implicit trust of his goals.
Gaurav: Probably a bomb with a curve painted on it.
Ganelon: Anyway, given the time of day, he probably keeps the boots until the next morning.
Gaurav: So does everybody go to bed? Or are there more adventures to be had?
Ganelon: Everyone but Rhu.
Apheori (GM): What did Gravy actually do with the bard?
Frezak (GM): I just hauled him out.
Gaurav: BTW I have a meeting at 3pm, so I should leave by 2:30pm or so. Which gives me another 1.5 hours.
Apheori (GM): And then what?
Left him there and went back in?
Frezak (GM): Yep.
Apheori (GM): Gravy comes back into the stench, followed by a guy singing about what he sees, and, subsequently, smells.
Ganelon: Truly this is the worst bard.
Gaurav: ...
Apheori (GM): A random patron helpfully gets up, clubs the bard over the head with some sort of mallet, and then goes back to whatever he was doing.
Frezak (GM): I sigh.
And drag the bard back into the grave.
Ganelon: It was nice of you to have tried.
Shall we progress to the next day, or does Rhu have unresolved business in his little nightmare realm?
Gaurav: Does Rhu know that he can't/mustn't fall asleep?
Frezak (GM): Remember, Rave.
When the world gives you dark.
Apheori (GM): Gaurav: Nope.
Gaurav: I mean, he isn't sleepy yet (I assume it's around midnight) but he will be eventually.
Frezak (GM): Make Ice-cream.
Gaurav: And this furry tunnel is so warm and cold and inviting.
Apheori (GM): I had ice cream for lunch.
Ganelon: I wish we had ice cream right now.
Gaurav: This is terrible party for ice cream cravings.
Apheori (GM): Okay, y'all sleep or whatever you're doing.
Radek keeps puttering, Rhu keeps crawling, Gravy and Greibel might get a room.
Although I expect Greibel will actually just keep stoning out outside.
And we can totally call that rest.
Frezak (GM): I thought we were squatting in the barracks.
Bear Soup Guy: He'll probably fall asleep in the alley
Ganelon: Well, we're meeting that guy in the bar rather than the barracks.
Frezak (GM): I'd probably drag Greibel to somewhere inside, regardless of where we sleep.
Ganelon: I regrettably forgot his name. Started with an E, I think?
Frezak (GM): EVARD?
Gaurav: George
George = miniRadek
Ganelon: Ah. Thank you, Gaurav.
No, if it was Evard we'd be dealing with a different sort of hole.
Apheori (GM): So Gravy goes and crashes in the barracks?
Ganelon: Shadowholes.
Frezak (GM): yup
tentacleholes
Ganelon: HoS talks about one of that guy's ambitions being to harness Shadow as a raw power source - as in, without any sort of framework for it to attach to.
But he failed and had to resort to Arcane means to do anything with it.
Rhu eventually gets tired and considers taking a nap.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: Do you try to take a nap in the tunnel full of strange whisperings and hairy darkness?
Rhu: Is there any change in the tunnel as I go?
Gaurav: sorry ooc
Apheori (GM): It gets tighter.
Gaurav: Hmm okay
Then maybe not
He'll keep going and see if he can make it to the end
Apheori (GM): That goes on for awhile.
You lose track of time.
Gaurav: You're assuming Rhu had track of time to begin with, but yes.
Does it appear to slope in any direction?
Do the voices change?
Apheori (GM): It varies.
And they're no longer sounding upset.
Gaurav: Oh that's good.
I think Rhu keeps going until he gets tired.
Given that his base constitution is +1, that's probably not all night
Apheori (GM): He gets tired at some point.
Gaurav: But he'll get hungry before he gets tired
so he'll keep going
Apheori (GM): What does he do?
He's not hungry, oddly.
Gaurav: in the hope that food is -- oh
hmm
he'll stop for a while
lie on the side of the tunnel
listen to the voices
rolling d20+14 perception check on voices
(
14
)
+14
=
28
Apheori (GM): The voices whisper weird things in his mind.
And he actually realises he's not actually hearing them with his ears.
Gaurav: ...
he's hearing things with his feet again
It's all that earwax
Frezak (GM): Footwax.
Apheori (GM): Clearly.
Frezak (GM): At least it's not earcheese.
Apheori (GM): I need to go canooing.
Gaurav: Now?
Apheori (GM): Soon.
Gaurav: The article I just looked up has a photograph of a kayak on it.
It must be fate. Or feet. One or the other.
Ganelon: If you were in a position to Canoe right now, I'd be impressed.
Apheori (GM): They're very similar.
Gaurav: so where is Rhu hearing these weird voices?
Apheori (GM): In his mind.
Gaurav: Ah okay.
Apheori (GM): They've been in his mind all along.
Gaurav: The usual, then.
Apheori (GM): Like how the hairy sight has only been in his mind as well.
HAIRY.
Gaurav: How do you tell that something is "in your mind"?
Apheori (GM): By rolling good perception.
Or arcana.
Or putting other clues together.
Gaurav: yeah, but ... what would that feel like? especially when Rhu has no other context on what is going on aurally around him.
Apheori (GM): ...normal, except where it isn't.
Apheori (GM) has helpful explanations, really.
Rhu tries to voice his own thoughts in his head and see how it compares with the other voices.
Apheori (GM): The thought-voice is similar, but a lot less distinct.
Not that the others are individually distinct, but there are a lot of them.
Or something.
Rhu: Hmm. Strange.
Rhu takes a deep breath, and continues crawling.
Gaurav: I'm going to say that Rhu doesn't stop for sleep. He doesn't like how tiny and suffocating the tunnel is, and would rather rest once he's sure that there's a way out.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Frezak (GM): If only... YOU COULD DIG
Ganelon: Impossible!
The art of digging has been lost to the ages.
Apheori (GM): So Rhu crawls. Gravy goes to the guardhouse. Radek tinkers in the tavern because nobody kicks him out. Greibel passes out in an alley. Amadi is missing.
Frezak (GM): Lost!
Gaurav: If only, if only, the woodpecker sighs
Apheori (GM): Way to not split the party.
I need to go find a canoe.
Next week?
Frezak (GM): No, I grabbed Greibel.
Put him wherever I was staying.
Ganelon: "NEXT TIME ON LOST"
Apheori (GM): Oh, okay.
Ganelon: This plot is about as convoluted as Lost's.
Frezak (GM): THere's a plot?
Gaurav: This is a safe, little town with howling moose, terrible bards, and a basement with a digestive tract. Oh, and all the guards have been killed by zombies. What could possibly go wrong?
Frezak (GM): All guards....
Apheori (GM): Lost has a plot?
Frezak (GM): Except ONE.
TO ARMS
SLAY THE GHOUL
Ganelon: We just need someone to grow a really nasty beard - Radek's disqualified for already having one - and scream about needing to "go back" to Sarathi.
Apheori (GM): I designate Rhu.
Frezak (GM): Gravy would steal the bits of beard that got stuck to the table.
Apheori (GM): After the digetive basement breaks him.
NEXT WEEK?
Ganelon: Next week.
Well, I'll be around. I am a constant.
Gaurav: Next weekend might be dodgy for me, but since I have a reputation for sleeping in anyway, I should be able to play in the morning at least.
And possibly as late as today.
Not Rhu.
Sadly.
He already had a chance to go home and opted not to take it.
He's not going to flip-flop on that.
Apheori (GM): He wasn't insane and bearded yet.
Gaurav: We could end up on a planet without hallucinogens and then Greibel could go nuts.
And violent.
Apheori (GM): After he's in the basement for a few years, he may change his mind.
Gaurav: ...
this is possible, yes.
Apheori (GM): Let me know if next sunday doesn't work for anyone. My schedule is like gan's.
Frezak (GM): As far as I know I'm not doing anything interesting.
Bear Soup Guy: I'm most likely free
Gaurav: Next week then!
Ganelon: I'll see you all there.
Bear Soup Guy: Adios!
Gaurav: Bye!

Session 34

Gaurav: <>
"Frezak (GM): Gravy would steal the bits of beard that got stuck to the table."
When this game restarts, I insist htat "bits of Radek's beard" go into Gravy's inventory
it might be important
Apheori (GM): Chat has been archived to: http://wiki.zaori.org/wiki/Holes#Sessions
This will eventually be formatted and some of the random chatter removed, but the originals will remain in the page histories.
Frezak: Per guarav's request, I added 'bits of Radek's beard' to your inventory (since you'd said you'd pick them up). Feel free to remove them or whatever if that's wrong.
Frezak (GM): I need some... honey.
Apheori (GM): Oh?
Frezak (GM): To stick the beard to my face.
If i'm going to be Acting Grump
Gaurav: They should have honey in the bar, I guess.
Or you could fall through the floor and stick the beard on with all the gunk in the basement I fell into.
It's very squishy.
Frezak (GM): Somehow that is not an appealing proposition.
Apheori (GM): Rhu tumbled out into space.
I don't recommend it.
Does he go insane?
Gaurav: It's very relaxing.
How long has he been out in space for?
Apheori (GM): Forever.
Gaurav: I think he'd be more likely to go catatonic.
No hunger, no metabolism, no fear, no change.
Apheori (GM): Okay, a few hours.
Gaurav: He'd wait, and wait, and wait.
He'd pray. He'd meditate. He'd sing songs. He'd tell stories. He'd start talking a LOT to himself, except mostly in his head, because of the whole no-air thing.
Apheori (GM): When Ellemerr gets back, I propose Amadi sit on him.
Gaurav: Rhu'd protest if he could, but how would he protest? He's all out of farts.
Oh, you know what?
No metabolism, no hair growth. No hair growth, no beard.
So he's neither mad nor bearded.
(Yet.)
Frezak (GM): I forgot that Rhu was undead.
Gaurav: ... so did I, actually. I thought that was the basement.
Apheori (GM): He isn't.
Frezak (GM): Damn.
Apheori (GM): Is he?
Frezak (GM): When you were blind I should have just gotten some fresh eyeballs.
Gaurav: o.0
^- from two different people
or like, one from a cat
no metabolism, no immune system, no organ rejection
brb
Apheori (GM): No organ taking, either. Things need to heal together.
Gaurav: Hmm
I feel like Radek could fix that
with chewing gum and chicken wire
Apheori (GM): EVERYONE.
BEGIN.
Rhu is tumbling through empty space in some weird nightmare plane, not really dead or alive.
Gaurav: How long has Rhu been floating in space for now?
Apheori (GM): And I am arbitrarily decreeing that Amadi is sitting on him.
Ellemerr: I can do that.
Apheori (GM): I'ma go with a long time. Several days at least. Long enough for his mind to basically shut down.
Gaurav: Ooo
When did Amadi appear?
Apheori (GM): Rhu: Amadi is suddenly sitting on you.
You may or may not have noticed right away.
I don't know what she's doing. Is she doing anything?
Gaurav: I only have two points of time reference: when I passed out from under the Giant Arm, and then when the Giant Blob disappeared in the distance
Ellemerr: I'm slowly spinning head-over-heels, I think.
Amadi: Wheeeee
Amadi does whatever to make the spinning go faster.
Rhu: HEY!
Wait. Am I shouting in my head? Ow.
You up there. Stop shouting "Whee". I'm trying to sleep.
Amadi shouts "Wheeeee" very quietly.
Gaurav: I assume Rhu hasn't bothered to open his mouth or attempt to take a breath given, y'know, space. I also assume that this doesn't matter.
Ganelon: Where and when are the rest of us right now?
Rhu turns around to look
Rhu: You.
Of course it had to be you.
Where's Dave?
Ellemerr: Where's Dave?
Apheori (GM): You all are probably in the guardhouse. Gravy was sleeping, Radek was doing worky stuff, and Greibel was... also doing something resembling sleep. But now it's morning.
Dave is... elsewhere.
Actually I have no idea.
Should I be concerned? Are you concerned?
Amadi whispers "Elsewhere."
Ganelon: About Dave?
(To Amadi): Also Rhu has to be dead and not in any living realm or you wouldn't be able to sit on Rhu like this.
Ellemerr: Works for me! :P
Rhu: Hmm. I guess that makes about as much sense as anything.
Ganelon: Dave is so far beyond Radek's ability to control that she might as well be dubbed the Quantum Godling.
(To Amadi): Considering he doesn't have the key, and all.
Gaurav: Incidentally, Rhu has been praying every few hours when he remembers to. He remembers less often these days, but I'm going to roll his last religion check just to see how his intergodal relationships are progressing.
Frezak (GM): You can control Amadi?
Apheori (GM): Also Rhu is just sort of talking in his head. Trying to talk. Knowing what he means to say. But no words coming out. Whereas Amadi is actually making words, but it's not quite clear how. Regardless you both can 'hear' each other.
You're, like, in a vacuum or something.
Amadi whispers, "Whyyyy are you trying to sleeep? They say you don't need to sleep when you're dead."
Ganelon: Okay, fair enough, but clearly quantum entanglement is at work here.
Gaurav:
rolling d20+9 religion check, but Rhu's long past the point of actually asking Hazz' for anything: it's just a general prayer of blessing for the world or something.
(
12
)
+9
=
21
Rhu: There wasn't anything else to do until you came along. I don't know how long it's been. There was a giant blob monster, but it's gone away now.
Amadi bonks Rhu on the head.
Amadi: Why're you here in the first place?
Silly place to be, really.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You hear laughter from time to time. It sounds a bit like Hazz.
Gaurav: The bonk causes Rhu to start spinning the other way, breaking several really very important laws of physics in the process.
Ellemerr: Psha, important laws of physics. I've no patience for them!
Rhu thinks for a bit. Given Amadi and Rhu's current state of weirdness, this might be minutes or hours or days.
Radek: Alright!
Apheori (GM): Gods, it's dry here.
I had yo spray superglue with water just to get it to set.
Sorry.
Rhu: I guess I could say that it started when you handed me the mask, but it didn't really, did it? In some way I've been heading here my whole life.
Rhu waves at the darkness and the void
Gaurav: Oh oh, sorry, I meant to ask but I forgot: this place isn't like Midnight, in that I can't make this appear by thinking about them, correct?
Ellemerr clambers over Rhu's head to dangle her own in front of his face, peering at him through narrow eyes.
The Gravedigger: Wasn't me!
Amadi clambers over Rhu's head to dangle her own in front of his face, peering at him through narrow eyes.
The Gravedigger: It was totally someoene else that sole your hair.
Amadi: This about Hazz, is it?
Apheori (GM): Yeah, it's more... real. Or less.
Did Gravy actually attach the beard bits to his head? >.>
Radek: Stole my-
Radek does a quick, desperate beard-check.
Frezak (GM): No, he just has them in a bag.
Ellemerr: I'm imagining this whole head-business in chibi style, by the by.
Gaurav: Ellemerr: bear in mind that Rhu's face is (1) blind, so maybe his eyes look weird, (2) but he's wearing the mask you handed him, (3) but it's covered in the remains of some globby viscous fluid with scratch marks in it, and (4) has a faint hint of puke about the lips. So, enjoy.
Does Amadi look hairy to Rhu?
Rhu nods.
Ellemerr: Amadi won't have any problems with that.
Rhu: I think I've worked it out. I think this is a dead end. My dead end. Maybe The dead end. I don't know. I don't think I want to know.
Apheori (GM): She's a lot less hairy.
Radek: ...Never mind! I'm not accusing anyone this morning. Not unless George sees fit to keep us waiting any longer.
Rhu: What I want to know is .. what happened to Azariphale?
Apheori (GM): She's hairy.
Ellemerr: ... Azariphale? Is this something I've missed or forgotten?
Gaurav: Rhu probably doesn't remember exactly how hairy things looked earlier, so he wouldn't notice the difference.
Ganelon: Forgotten, most certainly.
Apheori (GM): Aziraphale was with the party at the initial village and hole (the one in the sinkhole with the tree).
He wound up going mad and diving into the hole, never to be seen again.
Ellemerr: Ooooh!
Right.
Rhu: And that cat. The talking one. And the other one in the capsule.
So many loose ends. The story can't end with loose ends. And yet, here I am.
Amadi: Well what are you sitting around here for, then?!
Rhu: Well, here *we* are. Unless I'm imagining you.
Amadi: That's just stupid.
Hm? Oh, I'm here because you're here.
Rhu tries to poke Amadi, except he seems to have forgotten how arms and fingers work.
Gaurav: When are you guys meeting George?
Amadi: ...Though I'm not here because you're here in the same way as I would if Greibel was here.
Amadi nods sagely to herself.
Rhu squints at Amadi, then stops and sighs.
Radek: Where's Greibel?
Rhu: Where is Greibel? And the others? Are they okay? Have they figured out how to cure the Holes yet?
Ganelon: Unintentional!
Frezak (GM): I think I dragged the druid into a room to recover.
Amadi gives a long snrrrk, trying not to sound too judgemental.
Radek: I would ask about Rhu as well, but he has a tendency to /show up/.
Amadi: They're um, getting there. Probably.
Rhu nods.
Apheori (GM): Yeah, Greibel's on a bed sleeping it off. Unless Gravy left him on the floor.
Frezak (GM): I doubt it'd be any effort to pop him onto a bed.
Given my manly muscles.
Gaurav: I've always thought of Greibel as more of a smoking-it-off kind of guy.
Amadi: So, do you intend to just stay here, or...?
Rhu sighs
Gaurav: And I just want to clarify that all these sighs are in his head, because no air.
Rhu: That's what Dave asked me back in ... that place. Arah. She was very upset that I wanted to wait for the others.
Apheori (GM): He's sleeping off what he smoked.
Ellemerr: And the nodding is... also in his head, eh? :P
Bear Soup Guy: He'll gladly partake in some hair of the dog though as well :P
Amadi: Well, it IS pretty disappointing, I must say.
Gaurav: It *is* his head!
Rhu stops trying to poke Amadi and tries to shrug instead.
Rhu: I don't want to try. I don't want to fail. It's peaceful out here. Peaceful and quiet.
Amadi raises her eyebrows, giving Rhu the "Really? That's your excuse?" look.
Rhu: There's so much time to think. It's all I've been doing, thinking. And sleeping. And dreaming.
Gaurav: Has Rhu been dreaming? If not, he's only been imagining it.
Apheori (GM): He's been imagining it.
Amadi: Dreaming? Here? Don't make me laugh.
Apheori (GM): Unless, of course, this is a dream.
Radek takes a moment to blaspheme Hazz in Rhu's absence.
(To Amadi): For all I know that's how you've managed to show up.
Gaurav: haha
Apheori (GM): Radek: Could you give specifics? I want specifics.
(From Amadi): Yeah, but that still makes the idea of dreaming ridiculous.
Frezak (GM): I'm cool with blashpemy.
Gaurav: "Thank fucking Hazz' Rhu's not here"
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Apheori (GM): BSG: By hair of the dog, do you mean Greibel smokes more of the really stinky hallucinogens?
(From Gaurav): oh, you asked me to remind you that Greibel should be able to see into the future or something
Bear Soup Guy: Indeed
A small amount
Apheori (GM): Gravy: The place is really starting to smell awful.
Gaurav: A pick-me-way-up
Bear Soup Guy: heh heh
Ganelon: Well, firstly, he'll start with an utter lack of reverence for the guy.
Talking him down like he's Radek's old college roommate - and like the only way in which he exceeds mortal limits is in his capacity to be a wretched nuisance.
That might not be blasphemy, mind you.
Gaurav: Hmm, I wonder if Hazz' has an ego.
Amadi outlines the mask with a finger against Rhu's skin, grinning slightly.
Amadi: Would you like to dream again? Properly?
Rhu squints at Amadi
Rhu: No.
Yes.
Maybe.
Apheori (GM): Also, guys, I have to apologise. I just got a new tablet pen in the mail and it's really distracting me.
Rhu: I don't know.
Gaurav: Nice!
Amadi gives an exasperated harumph.
Frezak (GM): Even the godlings have little respect for gods.
I think you can blashpeme as much as you like.
You need a god-killer bomb.
Apheori (GM): I don't even know what is blasphemy around Hazz.
Frezak (GM): "I SURE DO LOVE ME SOME CROSSROADS"
(To Ellemerr): Especially since Hazz' great joke is that his entire domain doesn't actually exist.
Rhu closes his eyes
Rhu: Is there really a way back?
Apheori (GM): Greibel:You're in another room from the other two, right?
Amadi: Do you actually want one?
Ganelon: He'd possibly throw around a few assertions about how "being inconvenient and frustrating" is the "worst domain" and it's not even respectable like a lot of the actually evil gods out there.
Apheori (GM): Heee.
Rhu shuts his eyes tightly, and is silent for a while.
Rhu: I would like that. I would like that very, very much.
Rhu opens his eyes
Amadi grins again, widely and devilishly.
(From Amadi): What effect does the mask have on him? Would it help or harm to take it off?
Apheori (GM): Greeeeibel.
Bear Soup Guy: I can't remember what building we're in
Apheori (GM): You're in the guardhouse.
Bear Soup Guy: So I'm in another room if the beds are in another room
Rhu grins along with her, although he's clearly not sure why.
Apheori (GM): I guess you're sitting on the floor smoking now or something?
Bear Soup Guy: Makes sense
Amadi: So... this dead end is a complete waste of time? Right?
Bear Soup Guy: Sorry, I'm being distracted by Windows not knowing how to handle speakers and apparently being unsatisfied with my activation key
Gaurav: If nothing happens for long enough, Rhu's grin with turn hollow and confused and wrong.
Apheori (GM): Ahahah windows... wait, I was being distracted by it being too sensitive.
Quicky: Greibel: Do you do anything besides smoke?
Greibel sings Push It To The Limit and makes trucker horn cord-pulling motions
Amadi: And dreams are much better. Well, of course they are.
Radek gives Greibel weird looks.
Amadi: But what we want riiiight now...
Ganelon: Wait wait wait.
How GOOD is his singing?
Apheori (GM): What's a skill to roll for singing?
Amadi: Out. Outoutoutout.
Greibel: WALK ALONG THE RAZOR'S EDGE
Bear Soup Guy: Charisma?
Apheori (GM): Right, roll to sing, add charisma modifier and half-level or whatever.
Rhu starts grinning again at Amadi's evident excitement
Apheori (GM): Or is that already in the modifier?
Ganelon: It doesn't exist anymore. There used to be Perform (various stuff) skills.
Apheori (GM): >.<
Amadi suddenly tears off Rhu's mask and puts it on herself. Unless she takes a copy of it and it actually remains. I'll leave that detail to the GM.
Ganelon: You'd roll 1d20+1/2 level+Cha+(5 if 'trained' in singing)
(To Amadi): Mask lets him see, but turns everything hairy. I dunno what else it does. That's up to you.
Bear Soup Guy: For now I can just do like, 1d20+modifier+half level, can't I?
Apheori (GM): The mask comes off Rhu like the tearing of flesh. His face feels raw with out it, explosed.
Do it.
Gaurav: Aren't you trained in singing? I can't imagine that Greibel has never been in a band.
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20+2 PUSH IT TO THE LIMIT! WALK ALONG THE RAZOR'S EDGE! SOMETHING SOMETHING WORDS!
(
16
)
+2
=
18
Apheori (GM): Is he trained?
Bear Soup Guy: In singing?
Rhu screams in surprise, then gasps at the rawness of his faces. He reaches up to touch his face, and though his arms still aren't working properly, he gets there in the end.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+12 heal check to see what's going on with my face
(
2
)
+12
=
14
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You feel the shape of the mask still there. It just also feels missing. Your face, that it. You're a bit confused.
BSG: Yeah.
Bear Soup Guy: I don't see "singing" on my character sheet, so...I assume not?
Ellemerr: I think you decide on that right here and now.
Apheori (GM): That. It's backstory.
Bear Soup Guy: Well then
Ellemerr: I know Amadi is trained in it.
Bear Soup Guy: Greibel was in a band in college, and he has sung in many a dank and dirty bar
Rhu looks at Amadi in confusion and fright
Ellemerr: What does things look like to Rhu now?
Apheori (GM): Hairy and weird. With the queen of the hairiness sitting on top of him.
Radek: Come on, we have someone useful to meet. And keep singing that, Greibel. It's quite inspirational.
Gaurav: He knows exactly which plants to smoke to make his voice smokey, deep and rumbly.
Ganelon: If only my gloves included Ghost Sound.
Gaurav: Oh, so Rhu is no longer blind?
Amadi slowly disappears, leaving her grin, Cheshire style.
Apheori (GM): He's still weaing the mask.
Gaurav: oh, right
Apheori (GM): I don't know if he's wearing his FACE anymore, though.
Greibel: OPEN UP THE LIMIT, PAST THE POINT OF NO RETURN, YOU'VE REACHED THE TOP BUT YOU STILL GOTTA LEARN
Rhu: Um. Okay.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: Fortitude to not fall over.
Er, not fort.
Strength or something?
Rhu waits for ... minutes? Hours? Days? And then he sighs again.
Amadi 's grin edges slightly to the side, whispering enticingly, "Are you coming?"
Rhu: Oh. Er. Yes?
Rhu reaches out towards the smile
Ganelon: I'll try to incite a Wizard of Oz style musical march to the tavern (in the morning no less - aren't /we/ hardcore).
Bear Soup Guy: Uh, strength roll, right
rolling 1d20+1
(
13
)
+1
=
14
Gaurav: Acrobatics? To fall over and catch yourself?
Apheori (GM): Gravy, Greibel: Do you go along with Radek's musical march?
Bear Soup Guy: We march on!
Ganelon: Oh, Radek's not signing. Not unless you tell me he's like Christopher Lee as well as being a brilliant scientist.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You feel the smile pulling you in, to something. Something different, twisty, and full of hair.
Greibel falls over. This may or may not interrupt his singing.
Rhu goes with it.
Gaurav: I gotta ask: am I literally being pulled into the smile, in between the lips, or is the point of the smile, at one end, tearing a hole in space and yanking me through it?
Radek sighs.
Radek: Could you at least stick to the narcotics that leave your motor functions impaired, Greibel?
Ganelon: That don't*
Sorry, big distinction there!
Apheori (GM): Amadi: You'd have the best answer to that.
Ellemerr: ER.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: It feels like a somewhat large weight just fell on you.
Greibel: Well, I prefer to keep an open mind
Frezak (GM): If he has no motor control he can't get into trouble!
Greibel: Oof!
Apheori (GM): You're not sure where the weight actually is.
Ellemerr: I think it might be both.
Apheori (GM): But it knocked you over.
You can get up by rolling strength again.
Ellemerr: The smile tears a hole, and keeps it open with... itself.
Greibel:
rolling 1d20+1
(
3
)
+1
=
4
Ellemerr: Or something.
Apheori (GM): Greibel fails to get up.
Ganelon: Gravy, could you?
Frezak (GM): NO
I CANNOT
YOU HAVE SEEN WHAT MY STR ROLLS DO
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You're pulled through into weirdness. You catch a glimpse of Amadi, then suddenly you're somewhere else.
Gravy, don't be a wuss.
Frezak (GM): I'm just going off precendent!
Amadi makes childish "I won" sort of noises at Hazz.
Frezak (GM): Athletics?
Gaurav: ^-- see, that's how you blaspheme Hazz'
Ganelon: Foul recriminations are the best I've got!
Ellemerr: To be fair, Amadi has had a lot of time to practice.
Apheori (GM): Athletics, then.
Does Gravy pick up Greibel?
Gaurav: Greibel: try rolling the weight off yourself?
Bear Soup Guy: a 4 on strength dictates that I failed rolling the weight off of myself, I think
Apheori (GM): Gravy: Do you ignore him?
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+8
(
7
)
+8
=
15
Hrrrrg
tbrrrlt
Apheori (GM): What do you do?
Is this to pick him up?
Ellemerr: I think it is.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Gravy picks up Greibel. He feels slightly heavier than usual.
Frezak (GM): Yeah.
Prop him up against a wall.
Apheori (GM): Gavy goes to prop Greibel up against a wall and suddenly finds himself holding not just Greibel, but Amadi and a rather sticky Rhu as well.
Amadi: Wheeeee
Greibel: Oof!
Rhu looks forward, then over this shoulder, then down at the floor. Then he goes down like a felled ox.
Radek: ...
Rhu gasps.
Rhu just lies there.
Amadi clings to Gravy, hoping for more fun riding around times.
Radek: I should have taken /bets/.
Rhu flops around like a dead fish.
Gaurav: Err, dying fish
Ganelon: Of WHAT SIZE?
Gaurav: Rhu-sized.
The Gravedigger drags Rhu and Amadi to the nearest water source
Rhu mutters "I'm okay ... I'm fine ... I can walk ..." while being dragged, while clearly being only barely able to move
Apheori (GM): There's a well in the middle of town. A bit of a pool behind it, for whatever reason.
Amadi goes "Wheeee"
Radek practices his spiteful grumbling.
Gaurav: Okay, by all rights Rhu should now take several hours or days to figure out how to move again given all the time he's spent in space doing nothing, but since that would drag the story down unnecessarily, can we come up with a good/funny reason for this not to be a problem for him?
Ellemerr: Amadi could give him a massage?
Massages do wonders to me.
And she IS part god.
Gaurav: (y)
I thought God was part her?
Ellemerr: Er... Let's leave that open.
Why are we being dragged to the well?
Gaurav: I think 'cos Rhu is gross and covered in strange crap. Not sure why Amadi is being dragged along also.
I wonder how Rhu's crap will interact with the silvery stuff we found way, way earlier.
Ganelon: Oh, he's covered in strange crap?
I take a sample!
Also a blood sample!
Gaurav: On his face. Unless he left it behind when jumping through Amadi's smiles.
Rhu: (mumbles) Ouch.
Radek: Oh, suck it up. These aren't even my big needles.
Apheori (GM): He still is gross and stuff, yes.
Ellemerr: So we're dumped in the well or the pond? :P
Radek: So where were you /this/ time?
Not the barkeep's cellar, I imagine.
Gaurav: Rhu is going to ignore all questions until getting Gravy stops dragging him.
Amadi: He was dead and gone!
I got him back!
I'm really clever.
MUCH better than Hazz.
Not DEAD dead, mind. But dead-and-gone.
Gaurav: I think Rhu is going to give up worshipping Hazz' and start worshipping Amadi instead. This is the second time she's saved his life, not counting the time she saved us all from out of Midnight.
Ellemerr: I'm not sure she'll appreciate that.
Gaurav: Eh. I'm not sure Hazz' appreciates Rhu much right now, either.
Ellemerr: Heh...
Frezak (GM): Sure, I'll put you guys down by the well.
And start bringing up some buckets using manly strength.
Rhu continues to flop around, looking strangely happy to see everybody and everything.
Radek: So what's the difference between "dead" and "dead and gone"?
Amadi gives Rhu a stern look.
Amadi: We're not fishes, you know. Not for the time being.
Emptyness.
Gaurav: Heh. "Close your mouth please, Rhu, we are not a codfish."
Ellemerr: Yeeees! ;D¨
I love Mary Poppins a lot.
Gaurav: It's an awesome movie!
Ellemerr: It is! :D
Amadi nods to herself, then repeats to Radek, "Mostly emptiness."
Rhu splutters politely
Radek: I see.
Radek plainly does not see.
Amadi has long since given up on explaining anything to Radek.
Frezak (GM): DO YOU WANT TO SEE?
Ganelon: Worlds apart, these two.
Frezak (GM): I CAN SHOW YOU THE WAY
Ganelon: No that's cool.
Frezak (GM): I can perceive science.
Gaurav: That's what having Gravy vision will get you
Rhu is still flopping about, but his flopping seems more coordinated. He tries to take a sip of water, but winces. He reaches up to feel his face.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: d20, please.
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
20
)
=
20
Gaurav: Well.
Bear Soup Guy: \o/
Apheori (GM): Dammit.
Greibel: You know what Amadi is talking about.
Amadi: What are you talking about?
Ellemerr: Er...
Ganelon: Oh noooo
Ellemerr: The... difference between... being dead and being dead-and-gone. Gravy has been dead. Rhu was dead-and-gone. And those are different. Clearly.
Gaurav: Gravy has been dead?
Ellemerr: *shifty eyes*
Unless it was Greibel. Or both. I think they both might have had some death experiences.
Which would make it simpler for Greibel to understand what she's talking about.
Frezak (GM): I... don't think I've been dead?
Ellemerr: You got holed, buddy.
Frezak (GM): B..b... BUT
Ganelon: It's hard to tell when someone dies!
Like when Radek blew up a hole from inside his portable hole.
Did he die there or just escape the boundaries of the universe?
Gaurav: I was wondering how we'd all survived for so long. Evidently, the answer is ... that we didn't.
Ellemerr: *cackles*
Apheori (GM): Heeee.
So Greibel: All of that, with a bunch of nature of the universe/multiverse tacked on. The deadity, it's another reality. Lots of realities, really, all layered on top of each other. That one had emptiness where Rhu was, and this one has emptiness elsewhere, but everything, really, is mostly emptiness. But some of them, you're dead. Some of them are death. Something something. CHALK.
I drew Amadi.
Ellemerr: You did?
Gimme!
Apheori (GM): I dunno hooooow.
Ellemerr: And yeah, I'm not sure how well Amadi grasps the difference between being IN death and being dead.
Since she cannot do the latter.
Gaurav: But she understands that we can be dead?
Otherwise she'll just take us to one of the Death Universes and, oops. End of campaign.
Ellemerr: She knows it's bad, yeah.
Apheori (GM): http://wiki.zaori.org/wiki/File:Amadi_counter.svg
Ellemerr: She MIGHT not be entirely clear on NEVER GOING BACK EVER.
Apheori (GM): Terrible, I know. >.>
Ellemerr: Whee ^^
She looks so happy
Apheori (GM): Isn't she?
Ellemerr: Most of the time, she totes is! :D
Gaurav: Aww, cute!
Apheori (GM): Er, so Rhu gets washed by Gravy? Is that what's going on?
Gaurav: Rhu has sort of got fine motor control back now, I think.
He's feeling his own face to see if he's still got a mask on.
Also I'm not sure if he's blind again.
Apheori (GM): Rh got massaged by amadi/
?
Is he wearing the mask?
Ellemerr: He can.
Frezak (GM): Not so much washed as having a bucket of water dumped over him
Rinse and repeat.
PUNS FOR YOU, GAN
FOR YOUUUU
Ellemerr: Heehee
Ganelon nods approvingly.
Gaurav: Amadi ripped the mask off his face before he left the Other Place, but could still feel it there. I'm not sure how that's changed, if at all.
Ellemerr: I think the GM said it was still there then.
So I actually ripped off something else entirely, turned it into an exact copy of the mask, and put it on. :P
It could happen!
Apheori (GM): Yup.
Gaurav: Oh! I read that as you ripped the mask off, leaving behind an invisible mask that I could feel over my face.
Apheori (GM): Spoiler: It was Rhu's face.
Gaurav: Which mask was Rhu's face?
Or are they all Rhu's faces now?
Apheori (GM): Nothing, nevermind.
Gaurav: Okay. So. Is Rhu competent enough to walk after -- weeks? months? -- floating in space, or will he need more recovery time/Amadi-intervention?
Also: I should probably leave soon, as I have to be somewhere in about an hour. But I guess Rhu could be put into bed and ignored if need be.
Apheori (GM): I apologise for this not getting anywhere.
Gaurav: ... except for Rhu, who managed to get himself rescued out from an Void Without End.
Ganelon: Nah, it's cool. I'm half-asleep anyways just because of scheduling stuff.
I've been awake for over 24 hours now, I think.
Gaurav: Woah!
How much longer do you have to keep going for?
Ganelon: This session.
Apheori (GM): Man, and I thought I was out of it.
Bear Soup Guy: And I apologize for being many kinds of distracted today
I'm also very grouchy but you can't tell :P
Gaurav: Is that 'cos of the Windows thing or do you have other reasons?
Bear Soup Guy: There's Windows things and I have a cold
And I want to turn the air conditioning on but my mom won't let me
Gaurav: Ugh, sorry to hear that.
Bear Soup Guy: Ain't no thang
Ellemerr: So um. Are we sleeping now?
Well. Am I sleeping now? And Gan, and whoever else needs it?
Frezak (GM): Pffft sleep
Gaurav: I have to eat lunch and then attempt to save this presentation from the depths of despair
Apheori (GM): I had to take out my air conditioner last night because it was in the only not-locked window.
Apheori (GM) shakes a fist.
Apheori (GM): Also man, I think...
Um...
Sleep.
Ganelon: Calling it, then?
Apheori (GM): Yeah, sorey.
sorry
Ganelon: Nah, it's fine.
Usually my sundays aren't this busy.
Ellemerr: Sleeeeep.
Sweet nightmares all. Thanks for the game.
Gaurav: See you all next Sunday at the usual time?
Ellemerr: Er, no.
I am visiting Frezak. Frezak is being visited by me. *shifty eyes* Or actually we might be back here on sunday. But still... no game.
We MIGHT put you off for all of october, but we'll let you know after that first weekend. Don't expect too much, though.
Apheori (GM): Blimey.
Ellemerr: Yoop.
Gaurav: We could shift off weekends for the month, then, or something.
Or Saturday.
Ellemerr: I'm not promising that would help, though it's certainly possible. :P
But we'll come back to you on it. Promise. Just... nothing for this week.
Apheori (GM): You'd better.
Gaurav: Okay, I gotta run. Let's discuss alternate dates on Skype over the course of the week?
Either way, thanks for the game and see you all when we meet next!
Bear Soup Guy: Bye everybody! 

Session 35

Apheori (GM): Okay, so everyone's here?
Frezak (GM): maybe
Apheori (GM): Whoo!
Apheori (GM) falls over.
Ganelon: Here enough for your purposes.
Apheori (GM): Unless you guys want to play out Amadi and Rhu sloshing around in a pool of water getting bathed by the Gravedigger, any objections to just jumping straight to the inn to talk to George?
Gaurav: nope! Rhu can slosh in his own time.
Two quick questions, though: (1) is Rhu still wearing the mask? and (2) is Rhu still blind without it?
Ganelon: I certainly would not object to such a jump.
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Gaurav: Thanks. To the inn!
Is BSG really around? I don't think we've heard from him yet.
Bear Soup Guy waves a weary hand
Apheori (GM): Whooo.
Gaurav: Yay!
Apheori (GM): Have you slept? I don't even feel like I have, and yet I totally did...
Oh well.
Gaurav lays out a giant pillow for BSG to fall into if he needs to
Bear Soup Guy: I think I got five hours
A giant pillow sounds looooooovellllyyyyyy
Apheori (GM): ...okay, I dunno how long I just sat here with my brain going in circles trying to write something, but I need something to wake me up.
Frezak (GM): Not my job!
Apheori (GM): I'm not taking your job.
Ganelon: What's his job?
Other than playing the Gravedigger.
Apheori (GM): I don't know.
Okay, so y'all get Rhu and Amadi out of the water and head toward the inn. Somewhere along the way Rhu actually finds his legs and remembers how to walk, and you don't lost Greibel.
Despite all efforts.
lose*
Gaurav: We can always find him by sniffing for hallucinogens.
Apheori (GM): Well, in this case I mean he stays with you.
Instead of getting left behind.
So you find George outside the inn. He looks grumpy.
Ganelon: I'd remark about it being nice that the gang's all back together again, but...
Well, Radek.
Apheori (GM): There's a middle-aged woman talking at him.
He seems to be ignoring her.
Do you care at all about this or just ignore her too?
Rhu squelches along behind the group in his wet shoes. He seems surprisingly happy and very talkative, babbling loudly about anything and everything to anyone who'll listen long enough.
Gaurav: That's not the woman whose basement we tried to de-monster and ended up burning her house down in Arah, right?
Amadi listens intently to Rhu. Or looks like it, anyway.
Radek: Morning, George.
Ganelon: I trust his judgment. She's probably worth ignoring.
And no, Gaurav, that woman was crazy and couldn't have possibly followed us this far.
Especially through the methods we used to get here.
Apheori (GM): Completely different woman. Probably a local.
Frezak (GM): You thnk SANE people would use those methods?
Apheori (GM): Unless it's a disguise.
You can roll to check.
Gaurav: What's she talking at George about?
Apheori (GM): Something about giant rats in her basement and how the guards should be helping why aren't the guards helping you're a disgrace of a guard fuck you.
George sighs.
George: (to Radek) Oy.
I'll be blunt with you, but I don't really remember last night that well. What were we doing?
Rhu: (to middle-aged woman) We met a woman once who had a raccoon in her basement, can you believe it, a RACOON, covered in oil, it was nuts, but then ... (rambles on and on and on)
Apheori (GM): George looks a bit hungover, actually.
Ganelon: Hmm.
I don't know if I have a cure for that.
Apheori (GM): ...admittedly this is more because I forgot what happened that session myself than anything else. >.>
Woman: A raccoon? A rutting disgrace of a province. Completely useless, the lot of them, won't even do their jobs, and I've never even SEEN this one before...
Woman starts ranting at Rhu.
The Gravedigger: Hey.
This man is the last guard because the rest turned to flesh-eating zombies.
Radek: You offered to take us to the dimensional rift causing problems for this world. And the universe at large, really.
The Gravedigger: He's the last Guard.
Now give him a little respect, okay? He has a ton of work without people bitching at him.
Radek: I've been thinking about how to fix it.
Apheori (GM): The woman's mouth slowly drops open, and then she points accusingly at George.
Woman: WHAT DID YOU DO?
Frezak (GM): everyone okay with me relocating her?
George finally turns and gives her a surprisingly powerful hungover glare.
Amadi listens intently to the woman's rants, too.
Amadi: (Or looks like it, anyway.)
Apheori (GM): George's response to Radek dependso n what Gravy does with the woman.
Gaurav: Frezak: do it.
Frezak (GM): Gravy will pick up the woman.
With his mighty hands.
Apheori (GM): The woman gasps indignantly and starts flailing.
George snickers, then manages to stifle it and turns to Radek.
Frezak (GM): I will take this lady out.
Apheori (GM): Y'all are outside the inn.
Like, by the door or something.
Sorry if I didn't make that clear.
Frezak (GM): Oh.
I'll just go to the other side of the square and put her down and give her a stern look.
Radek: It involves... well, explosives.
I'll start small, no need to worry.
George: Right, yes. That would explain this spelunking gear.
George is covered in caving equipment.
George: And you were going to blow up the... zombie stuff.
In the cave.
Over...
Radek shrugs.
Radek: Ideally.
George: Yeah. Sounds good.
You all ready to head out?
Apheori (GM): Gravy: The woman yells at you a bit, then walks off in a huff.
Some girls watching giggle at it. Or possibly you.
Because you so hot.
Frezak (GM): I will plod back to the party and beam.
I was helpful!
Radek: Quite.
Ganelon: Likely none of us are even remotely prepared to explore a cave.
Frezak (GM): AHEM
Ganelon: I said CAVE.
Frezak (GM): I CAN DIG ROCK
I CAN DIG ANYTHING
IF I CAN DIG SPACETIME AND NEGATEIVE SPACE I CAN DIG SOME BLOODY ROCKS
George: Great. It's a few hours hike unless you want to charter an airship, which is a few days out because they never actually come here.
George eyes Rhu skeptically.
George: Are you SURE you want to take him?
Rhu returns George's skeptical look without pausing in his speech, which is explaining something about digestive tracts to no-one in particular. It's not clear when he last drew breath.
Radek: ...As much as I would love, more than words can describe, to let him be someone else's problem...
He has an uncanny knack for finding his way back to us. Supervision is for the best.
Ganelon: It's seriously uncanny, the places Rhu has come back to us from!
Rhu nods at Radek. He's now talking about saliva.
Amadi: He's god-addled. It's not his fault.
It's not even my fault!
George raises an eyebrow, but then guides everyone out of town.
Apheori (GM): Should anything interesting happen during the hike up to the cave?
Ganelon: Uh.
Gaurav: Conventional wisdom would have exactly one encounter --> http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0145.html
(To Amadi): Is it okay if I kill you?
Apheori (GM): Fine. You encounter a herd of elk.
They're generally all over the place, including across the trail.
Rhu: Ooo. Look at that.
Gaurav: Any zombie elk? Should we ask Greibel to turn into an elk and investigate?
Apheori (GM): They look like normal elk.
Radek: ...I've hunted worse.
Ganelon: In this campaign alone.
Apheori (GM): ...I should have handled the George guiding everyone out thing better. Because he didn't really guide. He just sort of left and assumed you'd follow.
Frezak (GM): I CAN TRACK HIM LIKE A GOD
With my serachlight eyes.
Gaurav: That certainly seems like a miniRadek thing to do.
Ganelon: Well, I followed.
Gaurav: Rhu's just happy to be back and would follow the party anywhere.
George glowers at the elk.
Apheori (GM): The elk just sort of stand around grazing.
Are you all there encountering these elk?
Rhu finally stops talking and just watches the elk quietly.
Apheori (GM): Okay, you're all there. Does anyone do anything besides stare at them?
Frezak (GM): I have no reason to interact with them.
Ganelon: I'll shoot 'em if anyone wants me to, but Radek doesn't hate all life /violently/ most of the time.
George grumbles and walks through the herd across the path. They mostly ignore him.
Gaurav: Yeah, they're big and scary (unless you're Gravy). Let's leave them alone, unless Greibel wants to do his druid thing.
Apheori (GM): A couple off the path put their heads down and kick their legs a bit.
WHO KNOWS ELK?
Ganelon: Definitely not me!
Frezak (GM): I think that at least me and Greibel have Nature
rolling 1D20+10
(
12
)
+10
=
22
That's mine.
Bear Soup Guy: ELK NO! WE DID NOTHING TO YOU!
rolling 1d20+13
(
20
)
+13
=
33
Frezak (GM): You ARE the Elk.
They are you.
You are all one.
Bear Soup Guy: The elk vanish to magical elk land where they will be safe, but away from us
Gaurav: The elk join our party.
Frezak (GM): Gorram leadership feats
Gaurav: They also sign authorisation forms so we can use them in Hole-related experiments.
Ganelon: Hey, man
Without leadership feats, how could one play a three-kobold mobile siege crew?
(The PC is the one with the Important Hat)
Apheori (GM): Greibel: The ones with their heads down are just worried that you might be after their food. If you keep going it won't matter.
Gravy gets a sense of this too, namely that there's no reason not to just go through them.
Since those don't seem to give a damn.
Greibel motions to everyone to just keep walking
Apheori (GM): Does anyone not do that?
Ganelon: Not I.
Rhu lingers behind the group staring at the elk, but if they get far enough ahead he'll realise it and run to catch up.
Apheori (GM): So Rhu lingers behind and then runs to catch up? Or does Gravy pick him up or something and just carry him?
Gaurav: Let's go with lingers, unless someone wants to drag Rhu along.
Apheori (GM): So nobody stops him?
From doing that.
Ganelon: Not I!
Frezak (GM): if he's capable of walking he can walk
Apheori (GM): Okay.
So Rhu lingers behind while everyone else walks through the herd of elk across the trail.
Meanwhile the agitated ones to the side (there are only a couple of these) become more agitated.
Gaurav: Can Rhu see that they are agitated, given that his mask makes everything look like muppets?
Apheori (GM): Does he have any nature?
(From Amadi): Yes. Sorry. Was dinnering.
Gaurav: +9
rolling d20+9 nature check
(
4
)
+9
=
13
If they're being noisy, that's probably fine.
(To Amadi): Excellent.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+10
(
5
)
+10
=
15
Nature again
Apheori (GM): They're not noisy, just... look like they're about the charge.
WHAT DOES RHU DO?
This is important.
(To Amadi): This determines whether or not you all spend the next hour running up a mountain chased by a herd of elk.
Apheori (GM) cackles.
Apheori (GM): Oh bugger, did I do that aloud?
Amadi giggles.
Ellemerr also giggles.
Gaurav looks around at everyone giggling and sighs.
Gaurav: I don't know how elk look before a charge. Is it big enough that Rhu would noticed through MuppetVision?
His passive perception is 24.
Apheori (GM): They have their heads down.
Gaurav: Eh, I'm going to say Rhu notices.
Apheori (GM): The agitated ones are looking at Rhu.
Rhu starts backing away from the agitated ones slowly.
Apheori (GM): Away from the rest of the party, which is through?
Gaurav: Oh. Hmm. I didn't realise the elk were between me and the party.
Is there space on either side of the path? Are there trees?
Apheori (GM): The agitated ones are off to the side, but you haven't necessarily passed them yet.
The elk are all around the path.
So... not really.
The party just went through the ones across.
Gaurav: No trees either? Hmm. Rhu will leave the path on the side opposite the agitated elk and give them as much space as possible to try to get through to the rest of the group.
He will also attempt some stealth.
Rhu:
rolling d20+5 stealth
(
19
)
+5
=
24
Apheori (GM): There are trees. You've gotten up into the foothills.
Gaurav: He will try to walk close to trees so he can climb them if that becomes necessary.
Apheori (GM): This takes him right into the rest of the elk.
The stealth actually works, but because he was acting so suspiciously right up until then, and then especially since he disappeared, the elk become even more agitated and the entire herd spooks.
Gaurav: Yay! Oh, wait, no, the other thing.
Just let me know when I should run up one of the trees.
Apheori (GM): Roll acrobatics to run up a tree.
Gaurav:
rolling d20+10 acrobatics to run up a tree
(
13
)
+10
=
23
Apheori (GM): There are elk stampeding in every direction.
Rhu tries to run up a tree and then falls on his face because his arms aren't working that well.
Gaurav: On the plus side, if Dave is anywhere within earshot, she'll probably swing by to investigate.
Apheori (GM): Some elk run over him.
Rhu: Oof!
Apheori (GM): Everyone else - spooked elk run past and you realise Rhu isn't with you. Unless you already knew that, in which case spooked elk just run past.
Radek: (To George) You see, this is what I was talking about earlier.
George: Eeergh.
The Gravedigger: RHUUUUUUU
Frezak (GM): 18 Con lungs.
Amadi runs around like a spooked elk. Joining in the party. For fun.
Apheori (GM): The spooked elk stay well clear of the Gravedigger, and are soon all past.
Rhu: If you're conscious, you hear him.
Actually you probably hear him anyway.
Gaurav: Heh. They might be spooked, but they ain't stupid.
Is Rhu unconscious? How much damage did the elk do?
Apheori (GM): How much damage should an elk trampling do?
Gaurav: It takes me 25 HP to be bloodied.
Ganelon: Well, uh.
Frezak (GM): I'd just take away a surge.
that's how I deal with out of-combat damage ofa ny significance
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Ganelon: Yeah, that's probably the most convenient way since I'd just heal him and he'd lose surges anyway.
Frezak (GM): Since he's just going to heal it up anyways.
Apheori (GM): Rhu loses a surge and is all sore.
Gaurav: Cool. That's 12 HP of damage. He now has a elk hoofprint on his left bicep.
I'll wait until we need it before actually repairing that damage. After my time in the void, it'd be nice to be sore for a while, I think.
Apheori (GM): So what do you do?
Do you go catch up? Does anyone go back for him?
Rhu wanders up to the rest of the group, grinning widely.
Apheori (GM): Right, then.
Ganelon: Like a lost puppy.
Gaurav: Like a puppy whose rolled around in the mud despite repeated instructions not to.
who's*
If anybody chastises him, he'll just grin apologetically and then point at the hoof print and go, "Elk!"
Ganelon: I've actually gone through that exact experience before.
I could swear, dogs become more affectionate the dirtier and wetter they get.
Apheori (GM): So you all are getting up into the foothills. There are trees and stuff. The trail leads up a mountain. Yadda yadda blah you get higher. A grasshopper flies into Greibel's ear.
Greibel reaches up to move the grasshopper to sitting on top of his ear
Frezak (GM): WHAT SECRETS DOES IT SHARE
Apheori (GM): ROLL DRUIDINESS FOR GRASSHOPPER SECRETS.
Greibel:
rolling 1d20+13
(
18
)
+13
=
31
Bear Soup Guy: This hike in the outdoors combined with the drugs earlier really has Greibel in nature affinity mode today
Apheori (GM): The grasshopper warns you to beware the reflections. The water is dark and muddy. And sticky.
It ate Bob.
Bear Soup Guy: Greibel assumes the grasshopper is talking about a fellow grasshopper drowning in a harmless puddle, even though I fully expect we're going to encounter a big shiny sludge monster that ate a human named Bob
Ganelon: You better offer some condolences.
Unless Bob was kinda a jerk.
Gaurav: "... with the drugs earlier"? Are you suggesting that Greibel isn't smoking something right now?
Bear Soup Guy: Greibel asks the grasshopper is Bob was kinda a jerk
Gaur: Well, just his baseline stuff. But the drugs from earlier were quite special :D
Gaurav: ah I see!
Apheori (GM): The grasshopper helpfully informs you that Bob was Bob.
Gaurav: I'll brb in 10 mins. If Rhu needs to respond to something, make him grin widely and do something silly.
Greibel nods sagely
Greibel says "Here's to you, Bob" out loud, providing no context to the rest of the party, before taking a huge bong hit
Apheori (GM): The grasshopper perches on Greibel's ear happily before flying away some ten minutes later.
Amadi: TO BOB!
Amadi keeps running around wildly.
Apheori (GM): Did amadi run after the elk or just run like them and then run back?
Ellemerr: The latter.
Apheori (GM): Awesome.
Ellemerr: And she's still running.
George ignore her.
George: s
Ellemerr: Probably in circles around everyone.
Apheori (GM): Well, you all get to a cave. The surrounding landscape is all stony and rugged and full of trees. The gave itself is a small hole in the side of the mountain.
George: So before we head in, I'd just like to mention that I'm not liable for anything that's about to happen.
So if the entire thing caves in or something, it's not my fault.
Radek: Don't worry, it'll be one of theirs.
George: I'm not sure how reassuring that is.
Amadi: Don't worry, we won't get buried. We have an expert with us.
Amadi leaps elkily onto Gravy's back and beams proudly.
Radek: ...Yes, he should be able to dig us out.
If he doesn't decide to kill us so that we end up buried /properly/.
Gaurav: Either way.
Ganelon: Radek's bedside manner is not the best.
Frezak (GM): recap for me, gan
dearest secretary
Gravy will wave a shovel
continue
Ellemerr: I did recaps. I can do that too. Yay.
Ganelon: Recap what?
Frezak (GM): nevermind
Ganelon: I mean, we messed around with elk, Greibel learned that "the water" ate Bob, which is likely a grasshopper...
And now we're at our destination.
Rhu wanders around looking at trees.
Rhu:
rolling d20+9 nature check on trees to confirm their glorious treeness
(
18
)
+9
=
27
Apheori (GM): The trees are trees.
Gaurav: But are they glorious? Or (more seriously) in any way affected by living near a putative Hole?
Apheori (GM): They look like fairly normal pines.
One of them drips resin in your eye.
There are needles all over the ground.
Frezak (GM): So they're also druggies?
Ganelon: Reused needles too, I bet.
Greibel: So many zings
George has lunch.
Apheori (GM) drops pine beetles on everyone's heads.
Ellemerr adds the beetles to her dinner.
Ganelon: Radek does that horrible thing he's known for.
Extracting all the goodness out of food and leaving the mass behind.
Rhu examines the beetles
Gaurav: With boundless fascination
Apheori (GM): Does anyone do or say anything about the cave, or do you just eat or not eat and head in?
Ganelon: ...Sure.
Radek: So you've seen the rift before?
Ellemerr: I'm following... or, riding... Gravy.
Without comments.
Gaurav: Rhu doesn't eat, but he'll follow Radek around, lingering behind to stare fascinatedly at things.
Greibel has a lunch of delicious drugs
George: Haven't SEEN anything. Everything's coming out of there, though, so whatever the rift is, we should find it.
Radek: You have no idea how deep it goes?
Gaurav: George said earlier that "they sent in a unit. They came out zombie."
George: I wasn't there, and nobody would come with and investigate again. Not after what happened the last time.
Nevermind that all you should really need is some proper protection, and if you never investigate you'll never even know what that is.
Do you know what that is?
Ganelon: "That"?
Apheori (GM): The protection.
Ganelon: Um... I don't think I do, but possibly I forgot.
Apheori (GM): I don't know what it might have been either.
May not mean anything. >.<
Gaurav: Do we still have that sphere of protection thing?
Radek: It might be best if you explain.
George: I don't know!
But I mean everything has something you can use against it.
Radek shrugs.
Radek: So far, we've managed without.
George: You go against normal undead, you take relics that repells them. Go somewhere with decaying particles, wear a suit that blocks the energy.
Maybe it's something you already have.
Frezak (GM): I only have one things for zombies.
George: Or maybe the group that went in before was all idiots.
And they did something really stupid.
Radek: Well...
Radek points at Rhu.
Radek: He /occasionally/ wields divine power.
Radek points at Gravy.
Radek: ...And I doubt he can sustain damage at all.
Rhu waves idiotically at George.
Frezak (GM): UNless it's from magic cats
George: (looking at Rhu disbelievingly) Really?
Rhu nods.
Rhu: *Definitely* Elk.
I saw it.
It was HUGE.
Amadi: I could be an elk.
I'd make a good elk.
So would he! *points to Greibel*
Rhu: (points at Amadi) She keeps saving my life.
Rhu grins at everyone, nods and everyone, and return to peering at beetles.
Radek sighs.
Radek: Yes, really.
George: Huh.
Well, that must be real interesting.
Shall we head in?
Radek: Certainly.
Apheori (GM): George heads in first unless someone stops him.
Gaurav: Brave man.
Brave, idiotic man.
Ganelon: I'm sticking to the safest position of "behind Gravy".
Apheori (GM): Well, first he yells loudly into it. When nothing happens, THEN he enters.
Ganelon: I would be a little miffed if George died. He's a good fellow.
But I certainly don't believe that Radek has any capacity to /save/ him.
Apheori (GM): Hey, he maybe could. Depending on what happens.
So you all follow George inside?
Ganelon: I should hope so.
Apheori (GM): Hey, you never know.
OKAY. THE INSIDE IS DARK.
Rhu wanders in behind everyone else.
Apheori (GM): Also the walls are really tight, so you can only go through one at a time and Gravy has to practically crawl. Also you're all elves so you can see anyway.
Ganelon: Huh.
Apheori (GM): It opens up into something pretty cavernous after a bit and you all can spread out and stand up properly again.
George is wearing funky goggles.
You all are in a large cave room thing. It's all steep around and there are cracks and passages and stalagmites.
There's also a massive pit before you.
George: (pointing into the pit) Down there. See how it's glowing?
Apheori (GM): Unless you're Greibel or Amadi, d20s to see how it's glowing.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
19
)
=
19
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20
(
12
)
=
12
Rhu:
rolling d20
(
8
)
=
8
Apheori (GM): Rhu: EVERYTHING IS HAIRY AND YOU SEE A PIT OF REALLY LONG HAIRS SNAKING UP AT YOU.
Radek: It's sort of glowing. Not really light, but magic.
Gravy: It looks like a deep pit.
Gaurav:
rolling d20 sanity check to not get freaked out by the hairs
(
8
)
=
8
Apheori (GM): Rhu: EVEN THE HAIRS ARE HAIRY.
Gaurav: Eeks!
Radek clicks his tongue and shakes his head.
Radek: Yes, I see it. A magical disturbance of some sort.
Rhu backs up against the wall away from the pit, but doesn't run away.
George: We'll need to get down there and check it out.
George has rope and tools and stuff and starts getting them out and setting up to go down with rope.
Apheori (GM): ...I forgot what you call that. >.>
Ganelon: Rappeling?
Apheori (GM): ...yes.
He sets up for that.
Frezak (GM): Can't we just put the MEGAORB on a rope?
Then just jump down with it and winch it up each time?
Apheori (GM): You could.
If you can get Radek to let go of it.
Radek: Oh, good, you came prepared with a way back up.
Ganelon: Let go of my precious orb!?
Actually, yeah, I think he could live without it for a few minutes.
Literally live.
If you want to be first.
Frezak (GM): I TOTES WANT TO BE FIRST
George: Yeah? How were you planning to get down?
Frezak (GM): I GRAB THE ORB
And.... all the rope;
Radek: Here, watch.
Gaurav: How deep is this pit?
Frezak (GM): And hand someone one end of the rope.
Radek hands the orb to Gravy.
Apheori (GM): You don't know how deep it is. It's not straight down, either - there is a serious of rather long steps where the rock shelves away.
Frezak (GM): I... suppose Is hould drop a torch to get an idea.
Of depth
or I could USE GRAVYVISION
Apheori (GM): No, no. You're future elves.
You'd use magic glowsticks.
Frezak (GM): Sure.
Futuremagictorches
Ellemerr: Am I still piggybacking Gravy? 'Cos that'd be GREAT.
Apheori (GM): Apparently.
So Gravy chucks in glowy things and uses gravyvision?
ROLL.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+20
(
16
)
+20
=
36
Apheori (GM): Man, how did you even get +20 on that?
Ganelon: He's Gravy?
Frezak (GM): gravyvision!
Apheori (GM): Gravy: As the glowsticks bounce down, you realise you can see around corners.
Frezak (GM): Actually, with Rhu it's 22
Ganelon: We call it Gravyvision for a good reason.
Apheori (GM): But you called it gravyvision when it was +8. Whereas this is actually impressive.
Frezak (GM): It's still gravyvision if I don't use my power.
Ganelon: He's had a power to give him ludicrous bonuses to perception for ages now.
Gaurav: I think Rhu only gives +1 to perception for allies within five squares?
Ganelon: I think he got it at level 2.
Frezak (GM): yeah, it's my L2 utility.
Apheori (GM): Well, whatever. The bit chasm pit thing goes down a ways, and eventually opens up on an underground river, which seems to have cut into a bit of a large room, and some random passages. There are lots of old bones and an alarming lack of bat guano anywhere.
Ah.
Frezak (GM): Do we have enough rope to reach down?
Since we should all have a ton of rope.
Apheori (GM): Since it goes down in shelves, easily. To go all the way down without resetting it up each time? Possibly.
Frezak (GM): How much possibleness?
Well, what if you guys rappell and I just make sure there are no terrible things?
If there's something bad I have Amadi.
Apheori (GM): Lots of possibleness.
Frezak (GM): Who will make tea.
Gaurav: And sandwiches.
Radek: ...Water at the bottom, hm?
Apheori (GM): You can't hear the water.
That is odd.
Radek: Hand back the orb, Gravy.
Frezak (GM): awwww
I comply, of course.
because everyone shoiuld obey grumps
Ganelon: You avoid a stern look.
Radek: So much for that idea.
George: What idea?
Radek: One could survive a fall with this, you see. Losing it in an underground river or drowning, however, are somewhat beyond its capablities to protect oneself from.
Frezak (GM): Hrmph!
Ganelon: It's also oodles of fun to get hit in the face with a shovel while holding it.
Frezak (GM): Shoulda got a Tenser.
's disk
George: Maybe I'm just missing the obvious here, but if the rift is down there, and the zombies got... out...
How did they get up here?
Gaurav: Is a Tenser's Disk that the thing we carried the Mouseforged around on?
Frezak (GM): yeah
Since it just floats down
We can just pile on and waft to the bottom
Rhu: (mumbles) They must have climbed the hairs. All the little hairs. All the big hairs. The big hairs with the little hairs on them.
Radek: ...That is curious. You're certain they came out of the cave's mouth?
Frezak (GM): I could heal Rhu
By slapping him
George: Maybe they got carried out the river.
Zombies wouldn't need to breathe...
Rhu: (focusses slightly) Maybe they climbed up? Or there's some way ...
Radek: It's possible that the water is tainted.
We observed a... similar phenomenon elsewhere.
Though the rift needed to be in constant contact with the liquid to exert any ill effects.
Apheori (GM): Agh, I'll be right back.
Something something has to be this because noises I'll actually write it out when I get back.
Ganelon: ...Right.
Apheori (GM): Sorry.
George: Well, it had to be this cave because it's the only thing in common between all the affected areas.
The kids would come in and hear voices, too. Said something about a hole...
If it is in the river, that would be kind of not good.
Frezak (GM): HOLES?
Gaurav: Does anybody have decent dungeoneering? There might be a hidden passage or something.
Bear Soup Guy: I've got a 6
Gaurav: Mine's 7
rolling d20+7 dungeoneering: look for hidden passageways, trapdoors, crevices, that sort of thing
(
20
)
+7
=
27
Bear Soup Guy: Rhu becomes a cleverly concealed spike pit trap
Gaurav: hee
Bear Soup Guy: punji was the word I was looking for
Radek: I'll do what I can, but we need to be closer than this.
Apheori (GM): Rhu finds a lot of hair.
There is some interesting hair.
He can examine the interesting hair.
Gaurav: I'll hand it over to Gravy for Gravyvision purposes
Rhu: Hair!
Apheori (GM): You can't hand it over.
It's a ruddy wall.
Gravy: Rhu tries to hand you a wall.
Gaurav: Oh. Right.
rolling d20+14 perception check on the hairwall
(
10
)
+14
=
24
What is interesting about this wall?
Apheori (GM): It looks like a wall.
You open a door in the wall.
Gaurav: Oh.
Rhu: Guys?
Apheori (GM): Rhu falls headfirst into the wall.
Radek: ...
Apheori (GM): I WANT POPCORN.
I mean...
Gaurav: If they just see me fall, I stick my head back out and wave at them to follow me. If I really fall, I scream as I fall.
Apheori (GM): You really fall.
Apparently down a flight of stairs.
Gaurav: One of my housemates was eating some last night. Should be some around.
Rhu: Oof! Oof! Oof! Oof!
... I think I found something!
Apheori (GM): They're not exactly even stairs, and feel almost organic in a way, but that doesn't make a whole lot of sense since it's just stone that conveniently shelfed off into fairly elf-sized stairs...?
Gaurav: Organic as in natural, not organic as in alive, right?
Radek: Sometimes, his penchant for trouble also pays off.
Apheori (GM): Gaurav: Well, it comes across as natural. It also comes across as something that might have grown.
Somehow.
Gaurav: Has Rhu stopped at the foot of the stairs? And does he get any falling-down-stairs-clumsily damage?
George: He seems intensely irritating.
Gaurav: I could acrobatics to catch myself mid-fall.
Apheori (GM): Rhu stops at a random landing. Which is to say a somewhat larger step. They keep going.
Radek: I seem to be developing a resistance to that.
Rhu:
rolling d20+14 perception check to see where I am
(
6
)
+14
=
20
Apheori (GM): Rhu: It's a crevice. With steps. Going down.
You can feel a cool, wet breeze coming up, and hear the sound of water.
Gaurav: As long as there are no obvious threats, I'll shout up for everyone else to come down this way.
Rhu takes out a glow light, and then realises, elf, so puts it away again.
Ganelon: I'll gladly descend the steps.
Like a sensible person, though. With my feet.
Apheori (GM): Elves still need some light to see.
If they can see at all.
Which, technically, Rhu can't.
George packs everything up and follows Radek.
Gaurav waits for everyone else to catch up; in particular, he'd rather not be in the lead going down
Rhu waits for everyone else to catch up; in particular, he'd rather not be in the lead going down
Apheori (GM): Have we lost BSG and Frezak/
?
Frezak (GM): I'm here.
Apheori (GM): So just BSG, who probably passed out?
Oaky.
Y'all head down the stairs. Does anyone take point?
Bear Soup Guy: I'm here
Apheori (GM): AHAH.
Okay, so Greibel winds up in the lead if nobody else aims for it.
Greibel: You're getting closer to something horrible and you can hear voices from whatever's ahead. They're getting louder as you get closer, but they're disorganised, jumbled, and all a bit on top of each other.
Gaurav: Gravy should be in the lead.
... oh dear.
Bear Soup Guy: pfff
Standard cave sounds, clearly
Gaurav: It's just the wind
Bear Soup Guy: ONWARD
Gaurav: Mildly disorganized wind
Bear Soup Guy: Wind and insects
Ganelon: Of course.
Frezak (GM): FORWAAAAARDS
Bear Soup Guy: Just call me the Warsong Commander
Apheori (GM): The stairs end spilling out into another cavern.
This one is dark and full of voices that nobody but Greibel and Amadi can understand.
George looks a bit pained.
Ganelon: What's up with him?
Apheori (GM): Rhu can see weird shapes moving through the hair.
You'd have to ask him.
Rhu: (whispers to Greibel) Can you see the weird shapes moving through the hair?
(To Greibel): He's seeing the shapes of things displaced in time.
Greibel: Um....no.
(To Greibel): It's not something he should be seeing.
(To Greibel): And why it has hair in it... well, that's just gross.
Ganelon: I'd rather Insight than ask.
(From Greibel): It definitely is!
Ganelon: Even if Radek is bad at that
rolling 1d20+4
(
18
)
+4
=
22
Rhu: (nods) It's probably the mask, then. It's an odd mask.
Apheori (GM): Radek: It looks like the place is giving him a headache.
Especially the voices. Maube.
maybe
Ganelon: ...Can Radek hear these voices?
I guess so, but best to ask.
Apheori (GM): You can hear them, but they're fairly distant and you can't make anything distinct out.
Frezak (GM): Unless anyone is going to stop me I'm going to HEEELLLLOOOOOO?
Ganelon: Go ahead.
Ellemerr: If there is no natural echo, Amadi will provide one.
The Gravedigger: HEEELLLLOOOOOO?
Apheori (GM): It echoes. The voices scatter like a swarm of tuna.
Then they fill the emptiness again when the echoes subside.
Radek: Hmph.
Ganelon: Arcana scan!
George winces.
Amadi: Elloooo ellooo elloo ooo oooooo
Amadi fades out and then comes back with ghosty noises instead.
Radek:
rolling 1d20+12
(
20
)
+12
=
32
Apheori (GM): Radek: It's the magic effect of a hole. It's in the next room. You'll need to be really careful with it, because it's not like the previous ones...
Radek: This is it, alright.
Be careful, all of you. There's something off about this one.
George puts on his industrial earmuffs and grumbles.
Ganelon: I s'pose I'll have a proper look at it.
In the next room, as you said.
Amadi eyes the earmuffs with a very childish "I want one of those" look.
Apheori (GM): Radek goes into the next room!
And your dm falls asleep.
Bear Soup Guy applauds
Frezak (GM): It's a Hole with a hat.
Ganelon: But what kind!?
Apheori (GM): Sorry, guys. I ran out of baileys and I'm just sort of dozing off again.
Ganelon: It's cool.
Gaurav: Sleep is good.
Apheori (GM): I'll describe the horror next time. And it will be horrible. And things will get hectic.
Gaurav: yay!
Ganelon: Things getting hectic in this campaign?
Inconceivable.
Bear Soup Guy: let's get ill, let's get hectic
Apheori (GM): Can everyone make it next week?
Or try
?
Are thre better days?
Discussment on skype.
Gaurav: Ciao, all.

Session 36

Gaurav: Today is Sunday, October 26, 2014, since Roll20 doesn't do timestamps on its logs.
Apheori (GM): DRAWRING.
What are you, american?
Why do you keep borking all your grammars like an american?
Gaurav: Eh? That's how we write dates in India.
Frezak (GM): Oh gods
IT IS A DIRE SQUIGGLE
Apheori (GM): You know whose grammars are good? FREZAK'S. GANELON'S. ELLEMER'S AND ROB'S MOST OF THE TIME.
It's always YOURS that takes the most cleaning up.
YESH.
THE SQUIGGLE.
Apheori (GM) yells at Gaurav some more.
Frezak (GM): I often mess up my (s) and ('s)
Gaurav: I'll just talk less then.
Ellemerr: That's probably how I get away with my mistakes.
Apheori (GM): Actually the only one who's just about perfect is Gan.
THANK YOU GAN.
Frezak (GM): He was well programmed
Apheori (GM): Also sorry for yelling.
You don't need to talk less.
Ellemerr should talk more.
This dire squiggle is a cave.
Frezak (GM): Ehhhhh
Apheori (GM): You all enter the cave.
Frezak (GM): She talks too much alread.
*already
Apheori (GM): Not here!
She should move more talkies here!
Frezak (GM): EHHHHH
Apheori (GM): XD
Ellemerr: *shifty eyes*
Apheori (GM): AGH I DO NOT KNOW WHAT I'M DOING.
Frezak (GM): Is that.... new?
Apheori (GM): ...no.
Frezak (GM): >.>
Ellemerr: I'm making dinner. And counting on Frezak to call me if anything happens. >.>
Frezak (GM) salutes
(To Ellemerr): Oh, you have another daily or whatever you can use. You can summon/command Dave to enact your vengeance and smite infidels.
(To Ellemerr): Because of your experience with the... lollipop you now know how to do this.
Ganelon: I really have to express my curiosity about just what you do plan when the time comes to think about this campaign.
(From Ellemerr): Great!
Ganelon: Surely there must be planning on some level, even if you're totally unprepared and making stuff up on the spot most weeks.
Apheori (GM): Uh... yes. There is.
Ganelon: But what is the planning /about/?
Apheori (GM): Just not nearly enough.
WHATEVER POPS INTO MY HEAD.
Wow, this is just sad.
My handwriting with a mouse is actually BETTER than with a pen.
Gaurav: It is larger.
Apheori (GM): Okay, so you all enter the room in the cave.
The dangerous room.
The one with the funky sounds and voices and strange light coming out of it.
The one Radek detected as the source of the anomalies, the one with the hole in it.
Gaurav: The cave with the water with the Funk in it.
Apheori (GM): WHO LEADS?
Bear Soup Guy: I hope we get to battle George Clinton
Frezak (GM): GRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAVES
Ganelon: Carrying his shovel like a warbanner.
Frezak (GM): Like a... marching baton.
Gaurav: Rhu is happy to bring up the rear as he's still slightly distracted.
Apheori (GM): Gravy, Radek: The cave room is almost completely dark, with no real light at all, aside from a single point in the air over a pool of water.
That green spot indicates the strange point.
The strange point flares for a bit as you enter, then dissappears.
Frezak (GM): I'll throw a flare into the room.
Apheori (GM): You can also hear voices, and sounds, completely chaotically and random. Some sound like normal conversations, others like the sound of waves crashing on a beach, crickets, yelling, a horse dying.
Generally only a couple at a time, with each snippet quickly being replaced by another.
Frezak (GM): Radek, check to see if there's planar damage?
Might be leaks from elsewhere.
Apheori (GM): The flare lights up the room showing what it otherwise a pretty normal looking cave room with no real corners, no horrible drops, just a bit of a shelfy thing with water deposits built up around a pool of water at one end.
Ganelon: I'm almost certain there /is/, but yes, I'll do that.
Apheori (GM): The water looks a bit thick, though, for whatever reason.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+12 Arcana
(
11
)
+12
=
23
This is to confirm damage to planes/reality.
Gaurav: Should I roll as "Gaurav" or as "Rhu"?
Apheori (GM): Well, it's a hole. It's different from the others you've seen, though - there's no real rip in space, and it's just... sitting there. A single point.
Either or.
Rhu:
rolling d20+14 perception check to see if Rhu recognises the voices from the many, many random voices he's heard so far this campaign.
(
13
)
+14
=
27
Apheori (GM): Gan: This hole does seem to span... well, actually, you don't know. It's just different.
Gaurav: Someone should check to see if there are any footprints on the ground, and particularly if they mostly head away from the funky water.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You make out a few specific ones. Someone shouting about a dog. Something that sounds like Hazz'ridan, but it's a language that makes your bones hurt, though you can instinctively understand the meaning. It's about time and rocks.
You realise it's all coming from the water.
Frezak (GM): Yeah, turn to the scienceman here.
Rhu: (advancing) Is that it? Is the Hole in the water?
Radek: This is... highly unusual.
Very unlike the ones before.
George: That... spot?
Radek: ...If I must rely on metaphor to convey such a complex subject, imagine that the universe is a length of fabric.
Most of these disturbances manifest as tears.
This is a hole.
Apheori (GM): Frezak: Can you get Ellemerr? Gan rolled badly and I don't know how to explain this. I mean, he got the start, but... yeah.
Ellemerr: I am here. What?
Apheori (GM): Oh, okay.
Radek: A single, clean point. And judging from these phenomena, a highly pressurized one.
Ganelon: That's a bad roll? Seems pretty average to me.
Apheori (GM): It's not a great roll.
It's a fine roll.
I suppose a bad roll would have gotten nothing.
Ellemerr: So what should /I/ do?
Apheori (GM): A terrible roll would have cave in the ceiling.
...I dunno.
Ellemerr: ... Roll arcana?
(To Ellemerr): This one's a tear in time. They're all tears. People just don't think of dimensions well enough to understand that this is what happens when one gets ripped. ANY one.
Apheori (GM): But you... uh...
I dunno.
Nevermind. Forget I said anything and carry on.
AMADI: The room is awash with light, all manner of colour streaming out of the pinpoint in the air. You can almost see shapes silhouetted against it, mirrors of the people in front of you... unless, of course, you're just seeing their silhouettes...
Which you might be.
You should roll arcana.
Apheori (GM): Rhu, Greibel: Roll d20s, please.
Rhu:
rolling d20
(
8
)
=
8
Amadi:
rolling 1d20 + 10
(
10
)
+10
=
20
Apheori (GM): Amadi: The silhouettes are reflections. It's dangerous.
George: Pressurised?
What happens if someone touches it?
Amadi: Probably something absolutely terrible.
Radek: Well, in the past...
The Gravedigger: I doubt it's going to rain cake.
More likely turn you inside out and leave you in a sun.
Radek: What was his name again, Azir...?
Ganelon: Calling in my "selective old person memory" card here.
Radek waves a hand dismissively.
Radek: Pah. In any case, he was never seen nor heard from again.
George: Assume a bunch of complete idiots came in here and found this. They probably touched it. But they came out again...
Unless, of course, *this* wasn't what they found, and it only became this after whatever they did...
Radek: Hmm. What did the idiots consider themselves qualified for, exactly?
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20 sorry, went afk
(
17
)
=
17
George: Fighting bears.
Rhu: I don't know, the pool Aziraphale fell into did look a lot like this. *And* there were zombies near it. No giant protective tree thing, though. And this pool isn't messing with our minds like the other one did.
George: Are you sure?
Radek: There are some undeniable similarities. I regret knowing so little about the problem at the time, or I might have been able to make a more accurate comparison.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You feel reflections in the room. Like time itself is converging on this spot.
Greibel bemusedly pokes at the air
Radek: Well, you all have your specializations.
The Gravedigger beams.
Radek: Get to work. And argue the theory before you actually /do/ something risky, please.
Gaurav: Do you think Gravy could perception-check the Hole to see how it differs from the one he fell through? Also, I can't remember if we think the portal Rhu fell through was technically a Hole.
Ganelon: It may be a little optimistic to expect this party to work intentionally towards a goal.
Frezak (GM): You mean the one I leapt into?
Rhu: Um, does praying to Hazz'ridan count as "risky"?
Apheori (GM) cackles.
Gaurav: The one with Dave. We didn't see you leap in, we were safely outside the compound. Eating sandwiches, I think. Rhu might have been in an alternate reality with sheep.
Apheori (GM): He didn't leap into that.
He almost got pulled in, and yes, that was a hole.
Amadi: Anything involving Hazz is risky.
Frezak (GM): No, I did leap into the one that I closed.
Radek: ...What possible benefit for us do you believe that would accomplish?
Radek holds up a finger.
Apheori (GM): You did?
Huh.
Radek: Spiritual enrichment does not qualify.
Rhu shrugs.
Gaurav: You never know. The last time that I prayed to Hazz' near a Hole-lake-thing, he stopped it from messing with our minds, gave us the power to understand the local speech, and I think refilled the pool. He has form with pools, is all I'm saying.
Urk, that should have been IC, sorry.
George: And Hazz is...?
Ellemerr: Still risky. :P
Gimme the alternate name that I keep forgetting, kind and wonderful DM.
Apheori (GM): Vitoi.
Amadi: Vitoi.
Radek actually looks just a little bit impressed.
Radek: ...A compelling argument! Irrefutable, in fact. If you think you can convince your god to contradict its own nature for the sake of all of our long-term goals, you have my... approval.
Frezak (GM): GOlly gosh.
That's almost as good as a pat on the head!
Rhu gives Radek a nervous glance, then begins.
George looks a little surprised.
Ganelon: I know well the ways by which a miserly man maximizes his paltry supply of generosity.
Surprise is paramount.
Rhu:
rolling d20+9 religion check to ask for Hazz's guiding light to show us the way to all our dead ends
(
13
)
+9
=
22
Ganelon: Radek isn't going to wait for the praying to yield results, however.
What he's going to do, I think, is sit down right about here and start tinkering.
Apheori (GM): The point crystalises and begins to glow again.
Rhu stays away from the Funky Water. He's watching Greibel and Amadi, neither of whom were around/awake the last time we had a Hole-pool situation.
Ganelon: Uh oh.
I've hardly even started and bad stuff is happening, isn't it?
(To Ellemerr): How the hell do you roleplay a god whose entire existence is a joke? I mean, literally, it's his joke.
Ganelon: Haven't even started blasting dangerously unstable compounds into this hole!
Apheori (GM): Well, you can do that now.
Gaurav: I have to leave in about an hour, but you should keep going if Exciting Things are happening!
Frezak (GM): I'm standing ready for zombles.
Finger on the Codrichun button
(From Amadi): With a lot of sillyness. Duh.
(To Ellemerr): Does Hazz seem silly to you? >.>
(From Amadi): Strangely cruel, actually. But I guess jokes can do that to anyone.
Gaurav: Greibel! Amadi! Do something.
Is there anything manmade in here? Or did the stairs lead down into what looks like a natural cave.
Amadi gives the silhouettes suspicious glares.
Apheori (GM): The stairs let to natural cave.
This is all... normal cave.
Amadi: Perception.
Amadi:
rolling 1d20 + 7
(
1
)
+7
=
8
Frezak (GM): You are transfixed by Gravy's manly posture
Apheori (GM): Amadi: You completely fail to notice anything in particular about the silhouettes.
And that, sure, why not.
Ellemerr: That is SO suspicious!
Radek mumbles to himself while he works on modifying one of his clockwork bombs.
Radek: ...What I can be absolutely certain of is that there is something - or nothing, but that itself is something - disturbing the magic around these phenomena...
...Happens /before/ the damage is visible. Need to be careful.
Ganelon: What he is going to attempt, is something really weird.
Predicated upon the notion that these holes represent an absence of reality, he is going to try and make a very small-scale reality bomb.
To cover up the damage, like... packing foam.
The kind that expands and hardens, not like... Styrofoam peanuts.
Apheori (GM): What colour is it?
Ganelon: Is that a question I would be qualified to answer, or Greibel/Amadi?
Considering the odd relationship of colours in this setting.
Apheori (GM): You can make something up. I just want a colour.
Frezak (GM): Paisley?
Bear Soup Guy: Paisley it is
Apheori (GM): What colour of paisley reality packing foam is it?
Frezak (GM): THe colour of the First Paisley
The Paisley Prime
The Progenitor Paisley
The Paisley from which all other Paisleys were born
Or Tartan.
THat's a very real colour.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
So does Radek use his bomb?
Or is he still making it? Or did he make it before?
I forgot.
Ganelon: He's modifying it. This is a non-rules interpretation of how Artificers work.
They put magic into objects.
And we'll say that it has a lovely surface of unpainted copper.
Maybe with runes on it now, I dunno.
Apheori (GM): Roll arcana just to be sure.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+12
(
9
)
+12
=
21
Apheori (GM): Okay.
No trouble there. Does anyone else do anything?
Ellemerr: I get something to smoke off Greibel.
Frezak (GM): I'm doing pretty much everything I can do.
The Gravedigger: Hmmm.
Ganelon: I made you a new thing, right?
What was it again?
Gaurav: Still praying.
Ganelon: 'Cause you let me keep the gloves.
Frezak (GM): Waterwalk boots?
Ganelon: Oh yeah.
Frezak (GM): NO I AM NOT WALKING ON THAT
NO SIR
Ganelon: I legitimately forgot.
You do not need to test out your new boots /here/ of all places.
Frezak (GM): Thank you
Apheori (GM): Though it might be funny if you do.
Ellemerr: Yeah. Funny.
Frezak (GM): Yeah.
Hilarious.
Apheori (GM): Ellemerr: What do you use to smoke it?
Or what do you do with it?
Ellemerr: STUFF IT IN MY EAR
Apheori (GM): Because I'm just going to say you get some herbs off him.
Okay.
Ganelon: Unburnt herbs in the ear. Of course.
A popular method of self-medication.
Apheori (GM): Gan: You finish modifying the thing.
Gaurav: I guess there aren't any bats or insects or blind crabs or anything in this cave. Are there any roots sticking down out of the roof of this cave?
Apheori (GM): Nope, just rocky.
Some hanging stala... thingies.
And a bit of drippiness.
Ganelon: Has Greibel nothing to do here?
We could use a weird tree.
Gaurav: We could!
Frezak (GM): I could stand and pretend to be a tree.
Nature Check to pretend to be a tree?
Apheori (GM): Sure.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+10
(
20
)
+10
=
30
Ganelon: Holy shit, man.
Frezak (GM): I AM THE ALL-TREE
Bear Soup Guy: OH NO, WE"VE LOST HIM
Ganelon: I didn't know trees grew in caves.
Frezak (GM): You just hear a fwoomp
Ganelon: Where did Gravy go!?
Frezak (GM): and then the sound of a tree growing REALLY REALLY FAST
Ganelon: Isn't that sort-of how Warden dailies work anyway?
Or do they mean "form" less literally?
Frezak (GM): Yeah, I was talking to the Hag about the Forms
And then I said "I hope I get a crit on this"
Apheori (GM): Welp, he seems to be a tree.
Ganelon: I would hang ornaments from your horns if I were in a festive mood.
Frezak (GM): What horns?
Ganelon: Your branches.
George: What the...
Frezak (GM): Right.
Gaurav: Does he have roots? And do they extend as far as the funky water?
Apheori (GM): Frezak: Do you?
Greibel starts skipping in a circle around the tree
Ganelon: Aw, that's just a mean thing to ask, Gaurav.
Frezak (GM): Nah, It's just camouflage, not transmutation.
You see roots but they only go down an inch at most.
Trickery!
They may wiggle occasionally.
Radek stands up and does a double-take at Gravy, but dismisses the thought that such a thing could possibly have once been his bodyguard.
Radek: ...Well. The first trial begins now.
Gaurav: It's not mean! It would have given us great insight into the precise funkiness of this water.
Apheori (GM): Does Gaurav need to leave? What's the trial?
Are you all doomed?
Gaurav: I do need to leave. I could hang about another ten minutes at most.
But you should totally finish trial 1 before ending today. I can read the logs later.
Ganelon: Okay then.
I invoke the awesome power of my HEDGE WIZARD'S GLOVES.
To do Mage Hand.
Amadi naturally climbs the tree.
Frezak (GM): Of course;
Ganelon: Conjuring a spectral hand of regular size which can float around and pick up or otherwise manipulate objects as I wish.
It can only carry like 5 lbs, but that's still plenty to deliver a ticking bomb into the hole.
Radek: ...You may wish to distance yourselves.
Frezak (GM): I AM A TREE
I FEAR NOTHING
Rhu backs away
Frezak (GM): I AM NATURE
Radek: This is an explosive, after all, even though it should be producing... reality, rather than heat or concussive force.
That is the theory, anyway.
(To Ellemerr): Oh, this is perfect. So utterly perfect. Waaaay better than I'd planned.
(From Amadi): Wheeee!
Apheori (GM): So you do it?
Gaurav: That's 10 mins -- I'm outta here! Thanks for a fun game everyone, and see you all next Sunday at the usual time!
Bye!
Frezak (GM): Have fun, Rave!
Ellemerr: No promises that we'll be on time next week. But have fun anyway.
Bear Soup Guy: Adios Gaur
Ganelon: If these guys aren't going to get to a safe distance, they had their warning.
In other words, yes.
Ellemerr: I'm in a tree.
Ganelon: From here, he starts the bomb's timer and then floats it towards the point in space.
Frezak (GM): You're in the safest place.
Ellemerr: Also probably safe anyway.
Apheori (GM): The bomb hovers on the point, covering it.
How long is the timer?
Ganelon: It's measured in rounds, so anything from... 6 to 36 seconds.
To be safe, I'll say 12.
Apheori (GM): Wheeee.
Nobody does anything in those twelve seconds?
Frezak (GM): I cycle oxygen
Ellemerr: Dangle my legs.
Apheori (GM): The bomb explodes with a weird floomp sound.
There's a bit of horrible light.
The silhouettes some of you saw before suddenly get a lot darker and you can all see them now.
Except Rhu.
Who can't.
Frezak (GM): I shake some leaves
Apheori (GM): You realise the silhouettes are actually outlines of your own shapes. The tree silhouette shakes some leaves as well.
Frezak (GM): *gasp*
Apheori (GM): We'll probably need Rhu. >.>
So next time.
NEXT TIME.
Frezak (GM): NEXT TIIIIIME
Ganelon: I'LL GET YOU NEXT TIME, GADGET!
Ellemerr: Hopefully, we'll be here on time. >.>
Frezak (GM): If anyone is Gadget, it's radek.
Apheori (GM): Yes, sorry. >.<
Ganelon: Well, he HAS gadgets...
But there's no way I would compare him as a character TO gadget.
Ellemerr: Heeee
Ganelon: Given how the character Gadget was a bumbling idiot who had to be saved by his daughter and a sentient dog.
Apheori (GM): He's not high enough level for that yet.
Oh.
Frezak (GM): hey, GRAVY helped you out with science.
Apheori (GM): So he needs to be hit on the head a few times for that.
Ganelon: Gravy's hypothesis was wrong! It just happened to also be thought-provoking!
The roles are reversed here, for the most part.
Apheori (GM): The best hypothesises are.
Ganelon: Radek is a calculating, efficient scientist who ends up getting saved regularly by a bunch of bumbling idiots. And Gravy.
Frezak (GM): Well excuse me for not being trained in Arcana, SIR
Awww
Thanks, man.

Session 37

Apheori (GM): Are Gan and Gaurav here, or is it telling the truth?
Also, for a recap of the last session, see http://wiki.zaori.org/wiki/Holes/Session_n%2B3
It's exceedingly short.
Basically Radek threw a reality bomb at the hole, and Gravy's being a tree..
Frezak (GM): Right, that's true!
Gaurav: I love Greibel's shadow person. Those eyes. That finger.
Frezak (GM): Yeah, that's pretty creepy.
Bear Soup Guy: He looks squishy ^_^
Frezak (GM): I briefly thought that it was the Evil Porridge
Dark Rasputin.
Apheori (GM): Ooo, whatever happened to Rasputin?
Frezak (GM): come to smother us all in oaty goodness.
Apheori (GM): Is he on Greibel's head?
Ellemerr: See no reason he shouldn't be.
Bear Soup Guy: Most likely
Gaurav: Oaty *badness*
Frezak (GM): Oaty Shadow.
Sounds like a band.
Apheori (GM): I guess there's a shadow Rasputin on the shadow Greibel's head.
Too.
Ellemerr: Heeeee
Apheori (GM): Okay, so you're facing a bunch of shadow-yous. The look a bit like silhouettes. You can insight them if you want.
The shadow tree (Gravy) is just sitting there shaking leaves.
It seems to be right on top of the hole so you can't tell whether it's still there or not.
But everything is silent.
Frezak (GM): My Insight is really not impressive.
Gaurav: Are they three-dimensional shadows? Like: dark, see-through bodies?
Bear Soup Guy: Uncanny valley
Apheori (GM): They're just black. Silhouettes.
Frezak (GM): Are they moving?
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20+11 on shadow Amadi
(
15
)
+11
=
26
Frezak (GM): At all?
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Ellemerr: Flat, yes?
Apheori (GM): The tree is moving. Tree-like.
They look flat, but they seem to have shape based on their movement.
The shadow Amadi is approaching Amadi.
Bear Soup Guy: Like a high-concept 2D indie platformer
Stylized and the like
Apheori (GM): The shadow Rhu reaches out to poke Rhu.
Frezak (GM): Nothing but good things can come of this.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You can see it as a crisp-edged shadow, which is unlike most everything else you see.
Frezak (GM): IS IT HAIRY?
Apheori (GM): IT ISN'T HAIRY.
Amadi: (to shadow-self) I'm not the whole. Are you the whole? Probably not. This is a bad idea.
Frezak (GM): IT ISN'T HAIRY?
Gaurav: What does the poke feel like? Can Rhu feel it? Is it hard/cold/warm/soft?
(To Amadi): The shadow repeats what you just said back at you.
Rhu steps past shadow-Rhu, to see how it reacts as much as to get out from behind it.
Apheori (GM): The shadow moves after him.
Well, turns.
Or something.
(From Amadi): But just me? The others don't hear?
Bear Soup Guy: Is its profile a thin line?
Rhu:
rolling d20+14 perception check against shadow-Rhu
(
18
)
+14
=
32
Apheori (GM): No profile. No matter what direction you look at it from you see a full outline. Like a three-dimensional object that just ain't bouncing light.
Ellemerr: Neat
Bear Soup Guy: oooo fun
Radek: ...That's not right. Not at all.
Frezak (GM): Nothing is, man.
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20+13 nature on the general vicinity of the James Brown water and the shadowies
(
4
)
+13
=
17
Frezak (GM): Nothing is.
Bear Soup Guy: eep
Gaurav: Ha! Just like Doom2 monsters!
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Frezak (GM): Or HEXEN
Ganelon: HEXEN
Yessss
Bear Soup Guy: We've fallen into the old school FPS universe
Frezak (GM): HEEEEXEEEEN
Dibs on the Necro Gloves
Apheori (GM): Greibel: The water is bizarre, but probably just full of minerals and charged or something. The shadowies are... also bizarre, and make a bit less sense.
The shadow Greibel picks up some water and it turns into a blob in its hand.
Gaurav: What's up with the Hole? Did Radek's reality bomb fix it?
Frezak (GM): Huh.
Is it holding actual water or shadow water?
Bear Soup Guy: ^
Gaurav: A ... two dimensional creature picked up a fluid and turned it into a three dimensional lump? Creepy.
Ganelon: I'm interested in whether the hole's fixed or not.
Frezak (GM): I think there's a shadowGravyTree over the hole.
Bear Soup Guy: mmmmmm, gravy tree
I'd grow one of those
Frezak (GM): DONT LICK ME
Apheori (GM): Yeah, the shadow gravy tree is in the way.
Frezak (GM): PERVERT
Apheori (GM): The shadow amadi tries to lick you.
Gravy: ^
Frezak (GM): EWWWWW
Apheori (GM): And yeah, sorry, only you heard that, Amadi. >.>
Frezak (GM): Shadowtongue
Ellemerr: So I'm sitting in the Gravy-Tree. And my shadow is walking up and... licking my tree?
Bear Soup Guy: A sentence I guarantee you nobody has ever said
Rhu waves his arms around shadow-Rhu where the hair should be
Rhu: (to shadowRhu) ... why aren't you hairy?
Apheori (GM): Yeah, it licked the tree.
Ellemerr: I think we have a lot of those sentences here, BSG.
Amadi suppresses a sudden urge to lick the Gravy-tree.
Bear Soup Guy: Truthfuly, we do
It's lovely, isn't it?
Apheori (GM): Shadow Rhu tries to hit Rhu with its maul.
Ganelon: Has the environment changed?
You know, magically.
Frezak (GM): Freaks.
Hey!
Gaurav: He'd probably go with Bond of Retribution, which is a melee attack, unless he (1) doesn't have divine power, or (2) just wanted to land a warning blow. Should I roll that for shadowRhu?
Frezak (GM): "don't touch my hair, man!"
Apheori (GM): Sorry, I keep getting disconnected.
I think.
Gaurav: Me too.
Bear Soup Guy: I got disconnected once too
Apheori (GM): Okay, so thing attacks Rhu.
rolling 1d20+4 vs ac
(
9
)
+4
=
13
The place is basically the same, so the magic didn't doo much to affect the cavern itself.
The thing just gave you a smack. Nothing fancy.
Or tried to.
Gaurav: (Miss) The blow narrowly misses Rhu.
Apheori (GM): I can't read this sheet.
Okay.
Frezak (GM): Narrowly?
You should have AC comparable to mine.
Apheori (GM): Everyone can roll initiative, or Rhu and shadow Rhu can duke it out in the corner while you ignore them.
It's up to you.
Gaurav: Not that narrowly, but not, like, comically wide. (My AC is 18)
Frezak (GM): I'm not letting anything hit my peeps.
Apheori (GM): And by duke it out, I mean like a pair of girls having a hissy fit.
THE TREE BRISTLES IN FURY
Frezak (GM): A hissy fit with giant hammers.
Gaurav:
rolling d20+5 initiative
(
17
)
+5
=
22
Apheori (GM): The shadow tree also bristles in what might be fury.
Ganelon: If nothing else, I'll sit on the initiative tracker.
Radek:
rolling 1d20+2 initiative
(
8
)
+2
=
10
Amadi:
rolling 1d20 + 3
(
9
)
+3
=
12
Frezak (GM): 22
I WAS BORN READY
READY TO BE A TREE, SPECIFICALLY.
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20+2
(
11
)
+2
=
13
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 + 5 shadow rhu
(
18
)
+5
=
23
rolling 1d20 + 5 George
(
15
)
+5
=
20
rolling 1d20 + 2 shadow greibel
(
2
)
+2
=
4
Gaurav: Does anybody have any attacks against fortitude? shadowRhu should be as bad at fortitude as I am.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 shadow amadi
(
2
)
=
2
Frezak (GM): Apparently not.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 + 2 shadow radek
(
17
)
+2
=
19
Bear Soup Guy: I have thorn whip and a daily AOE
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 + 5 shadow George
(
14
)
+5
=
19
rolling 1d20 + 2 shadow tree
(
8
)
+2
=
10
Gaurav: BSG: do you have anything that might impede the shadow monsters up north from joining the rest of us if they turn hostile? That might be useful.
Apheori (GM): Sorry abou that. I don't know what I'm doing.
Ganelon: Fort, you say.
Frezak (GM): I can get in there and pin people down.
Apheori (GM): You still have an Amadi in your branches.
Frezak (GM): So?
Bear Soup Guy: I have some stuff that slows things
Gaurav: You can rain down Amadi upon our enemies.
Apheori (GM): I dunno, just piointing it out.
Frezak (GM): BEHOLD MY FRUIT
STRAAAAANGE FRUIT
Gaurav: Golden half-mad demigodic fruit
Apheori (GM): So if something started a fight and everyone rolls initiative, does it still roll initative too?
AMADI IS A FRUIT.
I KNEW IT.
Gaurav: Yep!
Frezak (GM): If a fight goes off, generally anything in the area rolls init even if they don't intend to act.
So that we know when they would if they chose to.
Apheori (GM): So the shadow rhu just started it, but rolled better than everyone else, so it can start it again?
Gaurav: I see it as shadowRhu getting a shot in, then taking another one before anybody has time to react.
We Rhus are good at initiative. It's what we do.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Frezak (GM): Yeah, that first attack was outside of the initiative.
So it gets a full turn now.
Apheori (GM): ...dammit.
I guess it tries to grab Rhu's head.
Gaurav: I could play shadowRhu's attacks if you tell me what sort of thing he wants to do. I have all the stuff open.
Apheori (GM): Go for it. I forgot how grabs work again.
Frezak (GM): Str+1/2level against Ref
I think.
Gaurav: My character sheet says STR vs REF, no half-level.
Frezak (GM): Huh.
Gaurav:
rolling d20+2 (shadowRhu) grab Rhu
(
3
)
+2
=
5
You can add +2 onto that if you want half-level, but it doesn't really matter. Rhu is a weakling.
Bear Soup Guy: great success
Apheori (GM): Okay, shadow tries to grab Rhu around the head, hands outstretched, and winds up smearing one across the side of Rhu's face.
It feels really cold, like burning.
Ganelon: All attacks are made with half your level. It isn't accounted for in the stat blocks.
But it only makes sense, because you get half your level to all defenses.
Gaurav: Ah okay, makes sense. So it's 7 vs reflex then.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d4
(
3
)
=
3
Ganelon: Even so, no defense is ever going to be below 10.
Apheori (GM): Oh, Rhu takes that much damage from apparently being touched.
Gaurav: Huh.
Bear Soup Guy: He has very sensitive skin
Apheori (GM): Very.
OTHER RHU. YOUR TURN.
Gaurav: Lemme try my new level 5 thing: SEQUESTERING STRIKE.
"Your attack slices into your foe and through the fabric of space,
hurtling both you and that foe a short distance away."
rolling d20+7 wisdom vs AC
(
7
)
+7
=
14
Bear Soup Guy: Animated by Guillermo Del Toro
No wait
That other guy
Ganelon: Should've done your... avenger thing.
With the rerolls.
Frezak (GM): Shouldve sworn.
Gaurav: darnit
Bear Soup Guy: Robert Rodriguez
Gaurav: is it too late to swear?
Ganelon: Unless the DM's feeling nice, you wouldn't be able to get it for that attack.
Apheori (GM): It won't even help on this, but you can still do the action.
Gaurav: It would help on this. I forgot to do my oath of enmity before my attack, which allows me to re-roll.
Bear Soup Guy: The DM is subtly telling us that these creatures are all IMMUNE TO ATTACK
Gaurav: ... oh
Apheori (GM): You already swung at it. NEXT TIME REMEMBER YOUR OATH FIRST.
Gaurav: okay, then: standard action was a flop. I'll use my minor to do my oath of enmity against shadowRhu. Then I'll shout at him as a free action.
Rhu: HEY!
Gaurav: And I'm done.
Ganelon: You said that was a L5 thing.
Meaning a daily power.
Does it really do nothing on a miss?
Gaurav: sorry, level 3 --> encounter
Ganelon: Okay, that's better. Continue.
Frezak (GM): Okay, so who has the best AC between Greibel and Radek?
Apheori (GM): They appear to both be 20.
Frezak (GM): gosh
Ganelon: Artificers get leather armor proficiencies for some reason.
Apheori (GM): George has the lowest AC of anyone present.
Gaurav: Despite the earmuffs.
Apheori (GM): Those add to fortitude.
Not AC.
Gaurav: Nice.
Ganelon: I suppose it's because they're very strongly expected to be frontliners.
As if any true man of science would wield a brutish /melee/ weapon.
Apheori (GM): Oh, Gravy, you're up.
Which you knew.
Sorry.
Um.
Apheori (GM) throws things.
Frezak (GM): Well.
I'll use a Minor Action to activate THE BOILING CLOUD
Then I'll gander up here.
Then I will Mark both shadows.
Apheori (GM): Oh, should I add an icon for Rhu's oath?
Frezak (GM): And then use... Earthgrasp Strike on Shadow Greibel.
Ganelon: Very probably yes.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+9
(
4
)
+9
=
13
Vs AC
gaaaaah
That's all, then >.>
Apheori (GM): I have no idea what icon to use. Yay!
Bear Soup Guy: I was thinking this fight would be really cool if the shadows had opposite fighting styles of us
But then I realized we'd be fighting against a bunch of tanks
Apheori (GM): XD
George spends the entire turn taking aim at himself.
Shadow George does the exact same thing.
Shadow Radek... hmm.
Ganelon: HMM.
Apheori (GM): Radek is so fancy.
Frezak (GM): Shadow Radek grumps.
Bear Soup Guy: His misanthropy is especially acidic
Gaurav: It drips from his mouth and sizzles on the ground.
Apheori (GM): Okay, to be clear - Gravy is no longer a tree, right?
And did he ever put Amadi down, or is she now just sitting on his horns or something?
Frezak (GM): I'm totally a tree.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Frezak (GM): Just also wielding a shovel.
Apheori (GM): XD
And did you ever put Amadi down? Because if not, she should still be on top of you.
Frezak (GM): I did not do anything to her.
if she held on, she's still in there.
Somewhere.
Apheori (GM): Can you move her icon for me please? I can't use the key required to keep something out of the grid. >.<
Thanks.
Maaan, this was a terrible idea. Why did I think this was a good idea?
Ellemerr: Because it is!
It's just also difficult as all hells!
Gaurav: We should be fine, especially if shadowRadek stays out of the action and shadowRhu keeps making relatively weak attacks. I am very interested in seeing what shadowGreibel does.
Apheori (GM): Okay, shadow Radek uses ethereal chill on... uh...
So it's centered on an ally targeting an enemy?
Ganelon: Artificer abilities are a confusing mess, aren't they?
Yes, the idea is that you pick an ally with an enemy next to him.
Apheori (GM): Less so than Rhu's character sheet, but yes.
Ganelon: And the enemy takes damage while the ally gets some kind of minor buff.
Apheori (GM): Okay, centered on shadow greibel, targeted at Gravy...
Ganelon: Because his magic stuff is at-will powers and they can never be impressive.
Unless they're Firehawk.
Bloody Firehawk.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 + 9
(
1
)
+9
=
10
So it all fails, or what?
Ganelon: Yyyep.
Apheori (GM): GREIBEL.
YOU'RE UP.
Bear Soup Guy: GREIBEL TIME
I feel like I want to RP this and make Greibel trepidatious (NOT A WORD APPARENTLY) because these people all look like us and he watched that episode of Doctor Who where the 2D things didn't understand the 3D world
Eh, I also want to summon lightning storms though
Ganelon: Inside a cave, no less.
Bear Soup Guy: How would something like Verdant Bounty effect a combat situation like this?
Ganelon: Is that the one that makes this big overgrowth everywhere?
Bear Soup Guy: indeed
+5 stealth to allies in ten square range
Ganelon: We haven't got much need for hiding right now.
Bear Soup Guy: Thought so
Okay, thunderstorms it is
WAIT
Might these shadowy figures be weak to..."RADIANT" damage?
Or am I thinking too Pokemon for D&D
Apheori (GM) shrugs.
Apheori (GM): Are shadows normally susceptible?
Ganelon: To light?
Radiant damage is typically effective against undead.
Bear Soup Guy: Ah
Apheori (GM): Are shadows undead?
Ganelon: Shadows are a kind of monster, though. And they're vulnerable to it as well, I believe.
Apheori (GM): Ah.
Ganelon: Well... for example.
Ghosts have Insubstantial, that makes them take half damage from... all damage.
When they take Radiant damage, they lose it against that attack and usually for a turn afterwards.
Bear Soup Guy: Makes sense
Ganelon: Zombies would just take an extra 5 damage or so.
These things, if they'd be vulnerable, would strike me as the "extra 5 damage" sort.
Since we just proved that they have substance.
Well, Rhu did. By getting gently caressed by his clone.
Bear Soup Guy: I can get some extra damage in on Gravy's marks with a different thing, so I think I'll just do that
I'm so bad at this game
Apheori (GM): I'm worse.
Bear Soup Guy: So the number on a burst is the diameter of the burst?
Frezak (GM): It's number of squares outwards from the center.
Bear Soup Guy: Ah, so the radius
Sexy
Frezak (GM): Can't remember which is diameter or radi- yeah
Greibel CALLS FORTH THE SPIRIT PACK
Greibel:
rolling 1d20+7 vs Shadow Greibel and Shadow Gravy reflex
(
5
)
+7
=
12
Bear Soup Guy: eep
Ganelon: Actually you roll separately for each person.
Bear Soup Guy: Oh, nice
Ganelon: At least, I think.
Hold on.
Bear Soup Guy: Okay
Gaurav: We invoked spirits to fight spirits.
Bear Soup Guy: FIGHT FIRE WITH FIRE
Ganelon: ...Nah, I think I'm mistaken.
Sorry!
Bear Soup Guy: No worries
Greibel: I guess they were....
Ganelon: Wait, no, I'm double-mistaken.
Greibel puts on glasses
Greibel: Spooked.
Frezak (GM): yeah, I always roll for each guy.
Ganelon: This is an area attack. You always roll against each target of an area attack.
It's just a really weird area attack that hits a limited number of targets.
So yes, roll again.
Bear Soup Guy: Ah, right on then
so the 12 roll against gravy and
rolling 1d20+7 against greibel
(
4
)
+7
=
11
(shadows both)
Apheori (GM): >.<
Bear Soup Guy: and a massive success all around
I stand by Greibel's witticism
Apheori (GM): That your turn?
Bear Soup Guy: Yep
Frezak (GM): Well.
At least those guys starting next to me take... 4 damage >.>
Apheori (GM): Also, everyone: let me know if you touch a shadow.
Like, with a hand or something. Weapons don't matter.
They take four damage? Is that from the mark?
I don't know what's going on. Help.
Ganelon: I don't think it's the mark, but Frezak would know.
Frezak (GM): It's from the Boiling Cloud
Until I fully bring forth the might of Codrichun, I'm surrounded by a cloud that hurts people that start their turn next to me.
Apheori (GM): During Greibel's turn?
Frezak (GM): At the start of the affected shadow's turns.
Apheori (GM): Ah.
So not just yet, then.
But aiight.
Amadi!
Amadi sticks her tongue out at her shadow and climbs higher up in the tree, mocking her black clone as it's left behind.
Ellemerr: That is probably a combined move action and a vicious mockery that I shall roll. Yes.
rolling 1d20 + 6
(
16
)
+6
=
22
Hit
rolling 1d6 + 4
(
6
)
+4
=
10
Damage
Gaurav: Nice!
Ellemerr: Target has -2 to all attacks until the end of my next turn.
And I'm done.
Apheori (GM): All these icons are terrible.
Radek!
Ganelon: Trying to remember everything that happens without them is a lot worse.
Apheori (GM): Aye.
Radek shakes his head.
Radek: Try to leave one unharmed for study, please.
Ganelon: Who needs a good shootin', hm?
Or should I just summon robots?
I love doing that.
Gaurav: I think shadowRhu's the only one who's actually attacked up so far, although shadowGeorge is getting ready to. I imagine that's going to change in the next couple of turns, though.
Oooo yes robots
Ganelon: Alright then!
Radek powers up the eyebot.
It flies over to there, three squares (15ft) above ground level.
Bear Soup Guy: Robots versus shadow people
This is the encounter I'll use to convince people that D&D is awesome
Ganelon: That's his standard action. Nobody seems to desperately need healing, so his turn's done.
Apheori (GM): Okay, shadow gravy gets et by boiling blood, and in turn eats at boiling blood.
I have no idea if that actually does anything.
4 damage?
Frezak (GM): Yup.
Apheori (GM): Maaaan, Gravy is nifty.
Okay, how do marks work?
Ganelon: People with marks on them take a -2 to attacks that don't include the guy who marked them.
So if he fired at, say, Gravy and Greibel, he'd be fine, but if it was Radek and George, -2 to both.
That's an area attack example. Single target works the same way, though.
Apheori (GM): And to mark someone... is that a minor, or what? How many can you mark?
Ganelon: There's no limit to how many you can have at a time, but they tend to go away quickly.
Frezak (GM): Gravy can once a turn mark anyone adjacent to him as a free action.
Apheori (GM): Can shadow Gravy mark real Gravy and Amadi the way real Gravy marked them?
Frezak (GM): yup
Apheori (GM): Okay, he marks them.
And then he... uh...
Frezak (GM): Unless she's out of reach because branches.
Apheori (GM): He's got branches too.
Frezak (GM): Gah!
Apheori (GM): I guess the shadow Gravy assumes the form of the fearsome ram-tree, takes a step back, and then does the associated attack.
rolling 1d20 + 9 vs fort?
(
10
)
+9
=
19
Frezak (GM): yep
Apheori (GM):
rolling 2d10 + 5
(
6
+
7
)
+5
=
18
Ganelon: You want me to shoot him for that?
I can interrupt by shooting him for you.
Frezak (GM): I would love to not be proned.
Ganelon: It won't stop the attack, just gives resist 5 all.
Frezak (GM): Sure.
Ganelon: Okay!
Apheori (GM): So what does that do?
Radek:
rolling 1d20+12 vs. AC
(
20
)
+12
=
32
Ganelon: This is Shocking Feedback.
Frezak (GM): Hah!
Ganelon: Radek fires his weapon in response to an enemy hitting and dealing damage with an attack. Radek's shot happens first.
Apheori (GM): Resist all is what, +5 to all defenses?
Frezak (GM): no, it's damage reduction.
Ganelon: No, it just subtracts 5 from all incoming damage.
Apheori (GM): Ah.
Okay.
Ganelon: So this is obviously a hit, meaning our Gravy takes only 13 damage total.
And also the shadow one takes...
Apheori (GM): 13 damage and Gravy is thrown back three squares...
Amadi: Acrobatics to stay in tree.
Radek:
rolling 26+1d6
26+
(
3
)
=
29
Ganelon: That much lightning damage.
Frezak (GM): jeeeez
Ganelon: To the shadow.
It's 2[W].
The resist 5 lasts until my next turn ends.
Apheori (GM): 2d10 + 6 ?
Ganelon: It's normally 2d10+6, but critical hits deal maximum possible damage, plus a rolled amount if made with enchanted weapons on top of that.
Apheori (GM): Ah, right.
Ganelon: For a basic +1 weapon, you add 1d6.
Hence, 26+1d6.
Ellemerr:
rolling 1d6 + 9
(
6
)
+9
=
15
acrobvatics
Apheori (GM): 1d6?
Ellemerr: wait
>.>
Apheori (GM) is so lost.
Ellemerr:
rolling 1d20 + 9
(
1
)
+9
=
10
Ganelon: She's just making mistakes.
Apheori (GM): Amadi falls out of the tree.
Ellemerr: ... Can I take the d6 instead?
Ganelon: In and out of character, apparently.
Apheori (GM): Can radek shoot radek for shooting radek?
Er, gravy.
Or...
Ellemerr: Heeee
Apheori (GM) falls over.
Ganelon: Yes, actually.
Apheori (GM): Oh blimey.
Ganelon: The only time you can't use an immediate action is on your own turn.
So he can't, say, provoke an opportunity attack and then shoot the person in response to them trying to hit him with that.
Anything else is fair game.
Apheori (GM): Okay, shadow Radek does the same thing to Radek.
Ganelon: So roll a... 1d20+12.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20+12 vs. AC
(
10
)
+12
=
22
Ganelon: Alright. Shadow gravy took 5 less damage from the crit and Radek takes 2d10+6.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 2d10 + 6
(
5
+
10
)
+6
=
21
Wheee.
Shadow Radek grumps.
I don't care if it's out of turn.
Bear Soup Guy: The party is hit with 5 melancholy damage
Ganelon: Grumping is a free action.
You can do those on anyone's turn.
Apheori (GM): Excellent.
Gaurav: 2d10, eep.
Apheori (GM): Is an area burst 1 like the aura of codrichun?
I mean, the same size.
Ganelon: Area burst 1 is a 3x3 square.
Apheori (GM): Aiight.
Ganelon: Like so.
Apheori (GM): What's the most damage Greibel could possibly do?
Bear Soup Guy: Faerie Fire does 3d6+4
Apheori (GM): Heeeeee.
What's the opposite of radiant damage?
Ganelon: Necrotic, generally.
Apheori (GM): Whazzat do?
Ganelon: It's the damage type of shadow magic and most stuff related to the undead.
Previous editions would call it negative energy.
Apheori (GM): Does it do anything special? Or just look funny?
Ganelon: No damage type really does anything special. Attacks that deal necrotic damage tend to also weaken people and/or heal the user vampirically.
Apheori (GM): Mmkay.
Thankee.
Ganelon: Undead tend to be immune or resistant to it - in 3.5 and the like, they were often healed rather than harmed by it.
Divine healing spells, of course, harmed them.
So it's basically like un-healing.
Apheori (GM): Shadow Greibel does clinging drones at Amadi. Does that hit the real Greibel too?
It's a close blast 5.
Ganelon: Close Blast 5 means a 5x5 that must be next to him. So...
Apheori (GM): o____o
Ganelon: Like that.
Apheori (GM): Ooookay, he does that.
Ganelon: Does it target enemies, or creatures?
Apheori (GM): Creatures. So that would include shadow Gravy?
Ganelon: Yes.
Apheori (GM): OKAY.
Gaurav: Clinging Drones sounds like an awesome attack.
Ganelon: Pick an order for people getting hit and then roll 6 times.
Bear Soup Guy: Gaur: It really is
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 + 7 vs amadi fort
(
11
)
+7
=
18
rolling 1d20 + 7 vs George fort
(
2
)
+7
=
9
rolling 1d20 + 7 vs Greibel fort
(
18
)
+7
=
25
rolling 1d20 + 7 vs Shadow Gravy Tree fort
(
19
)
+7
=
26
rolling 1d20 + 7 vs Regular Gravy Tree fort
(
2
)
+7
=
9
rolling 1d20 + 7 vs Radek fort
(
7
)
+7
=
14
Ganelon: I have no idea what this power does, but if it's damage, you only need to roll that once.
And then just compare who gets hit and who gets missed.
I can say for sure that Radek, George, and our Gravy are fine.
Bear Soup Guy: Greibel is decidedly not fine
Apheori (GM):
rolling 2d8 + 5
(
3
+
7
)
+5
=
15
Hits get smacked and are slowed and can't shift (save ends), the miss ones get smacked for half damage.
Poor shadow Gravy.
Ganelon: Half damage in this case is... 7.
Bear Soup Guy: Also all enemies can't shift while adjacent to shadowgreibel for the rest of the encounter
Apheori (GM): Wheeeee.
Amadi seems mildly surprised and possibly a little pleased by her own hurtings. But man, that hurt.
Apheori (GM): Did anyone take off damage for themselves?
Oh, okay.
Ellemerr: I did.
Apheori (GM): Everyone do that.
Ganelon: I did as well.
Bear Soup Guy: Done
Ganelon: You'll have to do George.
Apheori (GM): Wheee.
I'll assume Frezak did Gravy even though he has so much health I can't even tell.
Ganelon: If so, this is a reminder that he still has resist 5 until my turn ends.
Frezak (GM): I wasn't hit.
(To Amadi): Shadow Amadi asks if you're real.
Apheori (GM): Miss does half damage.
Ganelon: You were missed, but this is a daily.
Frezak (GM): right
Ganelon: So take 2. (Wow)
Apheori (GM): Oh, right.
Forgot about that.
Frezak (GM): I FEAR NO FAERIES
I AM TREEEEE
Amadi: More or less. They think I am. I think. And that might be good enough. Does anyone think you are?
Apheori (GM): Shadow Amadi walks up to Amadi and pokes her. There's a massive spark, but it doesn't do any damage.
(To Amadi): I'm real. I'm real. I'm real, I'm real, I'm real!
Apheori (GM): From Shadow.
Apheori (GM) gestures vaguely.
Amadi: You don't sound like you believe that.
Amadi grins.
Apheori (GM): The shadow Amadi shrieks something silently and does a thing.\
rolling 1d20 + 6 vs reflex on Amadi.
(
16
)
+6
=
22
Gaurav: Huh.
Ellemerr: hit
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d10 + 4
(
10
)
+4
=
14
She used focused sound that nobody could hear.
Except Amadi.
I wonder if she can even affect anyone else.
Amadi clutches her ears and no longer looks like being hurt might be a fun thing.
Gaurav: So maybe she's the one we keep around for experimentation.
Apheori (GM): Are you kidding? Watch this!
Ganelon: I think we ought to start with dropping them as quickly as possible because PC powers hurt like crazy.
Apheori (GM): Shadow Rhu tries to swear an oath of emnity on Rhu and falls over.
Gaurav: It's ... a minor action. You don't even have to roll or anything.
Ganelon: Clearly he's been blessed by Hazz.
Even moreso than you.
Apheori (GM): And that
s it for shadow Rhu.
Frezak (GM): Wait for my turn, guys.
Shit is gonna get.... well, devoured.
SCoured.
Ganelon: The eye is watching.
Rhu looks down at shadowRhu with something approaching pity, but from the direction of annoyance.
Apheori (GM): So what's Rhu do? WHAT'S RHU DO? WHAT'S RHU DO?
Gaurav: Radiant Vengeance, is what!
Oh wait no
There's a penalty for ranged attacks from right next to someone, right?
Ganelon: No, you provoke attacks of opportunity for them.
But if you just shift backwards 1, you won't be in range for that to matter.
Gaurav: Should I spend one of my dailies? shadowRhu is being incompetent, so I think I can beat him by just hitting him over and over. But I dunno if I should finish him quickly and come over to help you guys.
Ganelon: Finishing him quickly would be appreciated.
Gaurav: Well then.
Move action: shift one step away.
Ganelon: We're not in a great spot here. People are hurt and I can only heal so much.
Gaurav: Standard: Oath of Consuming Light (Level 5 Daily)
Ganelon: Really not a lot of healing at all.
Frezak (GM): Don't worry about me.
I'm A TREE
Apheori (GM): A felled tree.
Roots sticking up.
Frezak (GM): I CAN RISE AGAIN
Apheori (GM): Defruited.
Frezak (GM): My fruit!
Gaurav:
rolling d20+7 wisdom vs reflex
(
20
)
+7
=
27
YES
Apheori (GM): WAZZAT DO?
WAZZAT DO? WAZZAT DOOOOOO?
Gaurav: That's 2d10+WIS(+5) damage, and I can never remember if you add half level to damage too.
Apheori (GM) clings to Gaurav's head.
Apheori (GM): WHAZZAT DO?
...sorry, I'll stop.
Ganelon: You do not add half level to damage.
So, 25+1d6 damage. Anything else?
Gaurav: What's the 1d6 for?
Ganelon: Crits on a +1 weapon.
Frezak (GM): So you disintegrate Dark Rhu?
Gaurav: "Whenever you hit the target with a divine power, the target takes 1d6 extra radiant damage"
Ganelon: Or if it's not +1, just 25.
Neat.
Gaurav: And that's (also) an aftereffect.
Apheori (GM): So 25?
Gaurav: I used my Implement, but I don't think it's a +1 implement. So yeah, 25.
Ganelon: The extra damage thing is a save-ends effect.
You probably want a thingy for that.
Apheori (GM): Oh.
Ganelon: And if they're vulnerable to radiant damage, this is radiant damage.
Apheori (GM): They ain't.
And I'm quickly losing track of all these effects.
Whoo!
Gaurav: so the aftereffect kicks in after the first one ends, right?
Ganelon: Yes, if he saves against the effect, he gets hit by the aftereffect.
Gaurav: so basically every time I hit shadowRhu with a divine attack, he gets 1d6 extra damage, until he saves against that.
Ganelon: Which is amusingly another save-ends.
Gaurav: THEN that changes to a 1d4 extra damage, until he saves against THAT.
wow.
Ganelon: Though you can't do better than Thrall.
"Hit: The target is Dominated (Save ends)
Aftereffect: The target is Dominated until the end of its next turn."
Gaurav: nice.
Ganelon: (It's in the level 20s)
Gaurav: I should really get an implement for Hazz' at some point. Perhaps a tentacle that I can wave at people.
okay, so that leave a minor. Hmm.
Ganelon: Oh, right.
Gaurav: Can I diplomacy with shadowRhu as a minor? Or would that count as a standard?
Ganelon: You hit him with an attack, so the eyebot shoots a laser at him.
5 damage automatically.
Gaurav: robots are my friend
Ganelon: There are no rules for diplomacy during combat.
Apheori (GM): Go ahead and give it a wonk.
Gaurav:
rolling d20+1 diplomacy against shadowRhu
(
12
)
+1
=
13
Frezak (GM): Remind me of the 'bot's range?
Ganelon: It's 3.
Frezak (GM): As far as lazors go?
Rhu: "Stop this! Your life is worth more than dying in disgrace in a filthy hairy cave!"
Frezak (GM): Gah.
Ganelon: So Shadowgraves is no longer in range, unfortunately.
Gaurav: WOOOOOOO laserbolt!
Apheori (GM): The shadow Rhu doesn't respond and just lies there.
Gaurav: so that was actually -2 to attack since I range-attacked someone prone, but natural 20 woo
and that's the end of Rhu's turn.
Frezak (GM): All RIGHY
Apheori (GM): Yeah, sorry.
Frezak (GM): Move: Stand.
I use my standard action to let Codrichun briefly touch this world.
The tree shakes its leaves, and a boiling could of grit and bone drips from them like ravenous pollen, gathering around the Gravy Tree before blasting out.
Apheori (GM): XD
Frezak (GM): Soo...
Shadow Greibel, Shadow Gravy and then Shadow Amadi.
rolling 1D20+12
(
15
)
+12
=
27
rolling 1D20+12
(
14
)
+12
=
26
rolling 1D20+12
(
15
)
+12
=
27
Vs AC.
Apheori (GM): I think that gets them all.
Ganelon: The eyebot is an excellent multitasker and lasers both of those two for 5 damage each.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 2D10+5
(
8
+
2
)
+5
=
15
And all targets have -2 to all defenses, Save Ends.
so Shadow Gravy takes... 15 damage and the others get 20?
Apheori (GM): Isn't it 10 and 15 on the others?
Ganelon: Shadow Gravy takes 10 'cause he's got resist 5 from Shadow Radek.
The others take 15 and 5 from a laser. 20 total.
Apheori (GM): Ah, I already subtracted the lasers.
Frezak (GM): Dammit!
Dark Gravy isn't dead!
LET US AMEND THAT
Apheori (GM): Man, for a god Amadi sure is squishy.
Ganelon: I don't remember if your chainshovel was used today.
Frezak (GM): Minor action: I slam him again with a shovel.
Ganelon: I guess we were thinking the same thing, though!
Frezak (GM): YEP
rolling 1D20+9
(
18
)
+9
=
27
AC
Gaaah
Ganelon: We're all squishy. Gravy is just exceptionally un-squishy for a PC.
Apheori (GM): How much damage does the shovel do?
Ganelon: Actual gods, though, tend to have immunity to attacks from anything level 20 and below. I think.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D10+5
(
10
)
+5
=
15
And he's prone.
Ganelon: I think that's curtains for 'im.
Apheori (GM): Nope, still alive.
Ganelon: Bah!
Apheori (GM): XD
Frezak (GM): Goddam!
Ganelon: Damn my own resist 5!
Apheori (GM): Oh, forgot the resist.
Ganelon: NEW PLAN
SHADOW RADEK'S POWER IS GONNA RUN OUT BUT WE SPITE KILL HIM ANYWAYS
Frezak (GM): I kinda want to execute my dark self now.
I can just AP and end him.
Apheori (GM): Do you want to?
Frezak (GM): YES
Apheori (GM): Pity.
You might have found shadow Radek's response... interesting.
Frezak (GM): Then I can mark the people flanking my fruit.
Ganelon: Interesting?
Frezak (GM): AP!
Apheori (GM): FRUIT.
Ganelon: You mean healing his ass for like 10 and 20 THP?
Frezak (GM): Strength Of Stone!
rolling 1D20+9+2
(
14
)
+9+2
=
25
AC
HRAAAAAAGH
rolling 1D10+5+5
(
10
)
+5+5
=
20
HEADSMAN CHOOOOOP
Bear Soup Guy: The crits are real
Apheori (GM): The Gravy tree smashes the shadow gravy tree into the ground, spilling branches and crap everywhere.
Frezak (GM): And then Gravy explodes out the tree, landing next to Amadi and screaming about fruit.
Apheori (GM): The dissolve into a strange black liquid and sink into the rocky floor of the cavern.
They*
Frezak (GM): And marks the two interlopers.
Apheori (GM): The branches. The dead guy.
Frezak (GM): Doing the desert raider thing again.
Radek: ...Interesting.
Frezak (GM): Turn over!
Apheori (GM): There's a puddle.
Ellemerr: That was pretty awesome.
And I should sleep. >.<
Apheori (GM): But it's shrinking.
The Gravedigger: GERRROF MY FRUUUUIIIIIT
Raaarghaaarglearrrgh
Apheori (GM): Heee.
George shoots the other George!
Gaurav: yay!
brb
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 + 15
(
9
)
+15
=
24
rolling 4d6 + 8
(
5
+
6
+
1
+
3
)
+8
=
23
He grumbles.
Ganelon: Nice shooting
Frezak (GM): Also I get 4 THP from Weight Of Earth.
George: Fuck.
Apheori (GM): The problem is shadow George then does the exact same thing, except at Amadi.
rolling 1d20 + 15
(
10
)
+15
=
25
Ganelon: I can't saaave heerrrrr
(Well actually, I could on my turn)
Ellemerr: Hit
Also when I said I should sleep I meant I should sleep.
Apheori (GM): Noooo.
Ganelon: Yeah, I know.
Apheori (GM) clings to Ellemerr.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 4d6 + 6
(
6
+
4
+
2
+
3
)
+6
=
21
Frezak (GM): good lord
Ellemerr: I have to get up in 7 hours, devil woman!
Also OUCH
Bear Soup Guy: The amount of crits today is staggering
Gaurav: ^ truth
Ganelon: You should have seen Frezak GMing the Fell Taints.
Frezak (GM): Those Taints.
They were the Fellest.
George: Wait, what?
Ganelon: There were many crits.
They were not given to the party.
Bear Soup Guy: Ouch
Frezak (GM): Well, they were given TO the party.
Ganelon: We had to run away like little babymen.
Frezak (GM): As you received crits.
Apheori (GM): What happens to a player when they're downed normally?
Ganelon: Unconscious.
Gaurav: And then saves against death.
Against oblivion.
Ganelon: They make saves to not die on their turn. Three failed saves in one encounter and they die.
Apheori (GM): Hmm.
This may be a little... different.
I need to think.
Ganelon: You can stabilize them so that they stop rolling said saves.
Apheori (GM): Ellemerr needs to sleep.
(From Ellemerr): Do I disappear on unconciousness? I mean, it's not sleep...
Bear Soup Guy: I need to shower
Gaurav: We could continue on Sunday if that works for everyone.
(To Ellemerr): Yeah, that's what I need to think on. XD
Ganelon: Or give them any sort of healing and they regain consciousness.
Bear Soup Guy: Should be good for me
Ganelon: No complaints here.
(To Ellemerr): If they take you out entirely the key would get wrecked, but these have all been normal attacks, which can't actually do that...
Ganelon: If we're stopping, though, allow me to make a summary of these silly icons because there's no way anyone's remembering it all otherwise.
Apheori (GM): Oh, yeah.
Gaurav: But I don't have to go for a while, so if you want to go on, I'm game.
Bear Soup Guy: excellent point
Apheori (GM): Sunday works for me too, and THANK YOU GAN.
I expect Frezak probably needs to sleep too.
Gaurav: Trees don't sleep.
Apheori (GM): YES THEY DO.
THEY BREATHE BACKWARDS AND STUFF IN THEIR SLEEP.
Gaurav: They breathe backwards in the day, too. They just also breathe ... forwards at the same time.
Ganelon: Shadow Greibel and Shadow Amadi have a -2 to defenses until the end of Gravy's next turn. They are also both marked by Gravy.
Shadow Amadi has a -2 to attacks which should actually have expired by now, so take of the jagged spiral thingy.
Greibel is slowed and cannot shift (save ends).
No-one can shift while next to Shadow Greibel for the rest of this fight.
Shadow Rhu is the target of Rhu's oath, prone, and takes 1d6 radiant damage whenever Rhu hits him with a divine power (save ends). If he saves against it, he instead takes 1d4 radiant (save ends again).
Frezak (GM): The -2 to defenses is SE.
Ganelon: Oh? Sorry, then.
Frezak (GM): Codrichuuuuun
Ganelon: Shadow Greibel and Shadow Amadi have a -2 to defenses (save ends).
That's all. See you all Sunday.
Bear Soup Guy: Fantastic
Apheori (GM): Excellent.
Gaurav: What time Sunday? Usual, or same as today?
Apheori (GM): We are on shadow Radek's turn.
Ganelon: "When the DM is conscious."
Bear Soup Guy: ^
Apheori (GM): That.
Gaurav: Perfect.
Apheori (GM): I like 17:00 UTC. That seems like a good time to aim to all be here by.
...because I probably CAN.
Bear Soup Guy: Sounds good to me
See you all Sunday then!
Good day, one and all
Gaurav: Bye everybody!
(To Ellemerr): I guess Amadi is just unconscious and collapsed for now. So we'll handle it like normal unless one of the shadows does an actual something weird to her.
(To Ellemerr): A normal kill (non fancy shadow stuff) will kill her body, but with the key she's basically untouchable technically anyway and will just come back, but if they wreck the key, badness will ensue.
Frezak (GM): Ta-ta!
Apheori (GM): Quick question for those still here - does anyone know if Greibel is using his bong as an implement?
Ganelon: I assume that's the only one he has, so yes.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Apheori (GM) grins slowly.
Gaurav: o.0
Frezak (GM): I believe I did suggest that he did.
Apheori (GM): General log note: Today was 19 November. The next one is scheduled for 23 November.

Session 38

Apheori (GM): We're missing someone.
Ganelon: Rob's not here according to my screen
Bear Soup Guy: I am!
No Frezak or Gan on my screen
err
Frezak or Gaur
Gaurav: I can see Rob and Gan, but I can't see Frezak.
Ganelon: I stand corrected, then.
Gaurav is missing, yes.
Bear Soup Guy: Missing but in action
Gaurav: I'm here in spirit.
Apheori (GM): What about Frezak?
Or is he here too and it's lying about two of them to me?
Bear Soup Guy: Server's must be un-synced or some bollocks
Apheori isn't here now either D:
Apheori (GM): I think I'm here, but I also keep getting disconnected.
Frezak (GM): Here I am!
Apheori (GM): Hi.
Okay!
Frezak (GM): HELLO
Bear Soup Guy: Rock us like a Hurricane
Apheori (GM): Gaurav is still here, right?
Gaurav: Yes!
Apheori (GM): Okay, weird.
So everything's fighting, gan gave a rundown of current effects last time and I'll just paste that here:
Shadow Greibel and Shadow Amadi have a -2 to defenses until the end of Gravy's next turn. They are also both marked by Gravy.
Greibel is slowed and cannot shift (save ends).
Apheori (GM): No-one can shift while next to Shadow Greibel for the rest of this fight.
Shadow Rhu is the target of Rhu's oath, prone, and takes 1d6 radiant damage whenever Rhu hits him with a divine power (save ends). If he saves against it, he instead takes 1d4 radiant (save ends again).
Gaurav: Being rocked in a cave sounds like a bad idea, hurricane or no hurricane.
Apheori (GM): Aaaand we're apparently on shadow Radek's turn so he'll... uh...
Ganelon: Those -2 to defenses are actually save-ends. That was a mistake on my part.
Frezak (GM): CODRICHUN DOESNT LEAVE THAT EASILY
Apheori (GM): I guess shadow Radek throws some infusions at shadow Amadi.
This is confusing. >.<
Ganelon: Not "some".
Apheori (GM): And for some reason the first page is missing from all the character sheets I have.
Whaaaat.
Ganelon: You can only use one infusion per round.
And you only get two.
Apheori (GM): Really? It only mentioned healing infusions specifically.
Ganelon: All infusions are healing infusions.
Apheori (GM): Ah.
Okay.
Ganelon: Curative Admixture is just the only one that heals.
Apheori (GM): Why are some prefixed Healing infusion and others not?
Ganelon: I don't understand what you mean.
He has Curative Admixture and Shielding Elixir and that's it.
Restorative Infusion is a misleadingly named daily utility power that has no actual relation to infusions.
Apheori (GM): Oh, okay.
Ganelon: So he can use a minor to toss an infusion, turn his move into a minor to use that daily utility, and spend a standard action on something else.
Apheori (GM): And I got the first pages back! Whee!
Okay, so he does that...
What would Radek do with his standard action?
Gaurav: What had happened to the first pages?
Apheori (GM): Filesystem dropped and they weren't actually in memory or something.
Ganelon: Well, he has no robots.
Alternatively he could shoot someone.
Apheori (GM): Hmm.
For some reason this one uses thundering armour on his Amadi trying to push Gravy away.
rolling 1d20 + 9 vs Gravy fortitude
(
7
)
+9
=
16
Frezak (GM): miss.
Gravy remains steadfast.
And shaking the odd leaf out his clothes.
Apheori (GM): LEAVES.
Ganelon: GREEB.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You're up.
Frezak (GM): The shadows near me are ripe for the plucking.
And by plucking I mean blasting with bong-juice.
Apheori (GM): Oh.
GREIBEL: PERCEPTION.
Before you do anything else.
Bear Soup Guy: OKAY
rolling 1d20+11
(
3
)
+11
=
14
Apheori (GM): Greibel: Your bong feels a little funny. You're not entirely sure how or why.
Now do your turn and stuff.
I think you need to do a save for the slowed.
I don't know how that works.
>.>
Bear Soup Guy: I can't remember if it's at the beginning or end of the turn
Ganelon: End.
Always end, unless you're Gravy.
It's a Warden thing.
Bear Soup Guy: Sexy
And slowed, that cuts my speed in half or something?
Frezak (GM): Makes your base speed 2.
Bear Soup Guy: Ah, right-o
rolling 1d20+7 vs Shadow Amadi reflex
(
20
)
+7
=
27
Frezak (GM): HAH
Bear Soup Guy: \o/
Apheori (GM): Critical and everything.
Gaurav: Even shadow godlings can't move too fast for Greibel
Bear Soup Guy: So 12 damage to her and I have the fire hawk opportunity thing until my next turn
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Frezak (GM): FIREHAAAWK
INTO HER TOASTY BOSOM
Bear Soup Guy: Right in the solar plexus
Apheori (GM): Eeeeek.
Ganelon: Oh, right.
You hit her with an attack. Know what that means?
Frezak (GM): PEW
Ganelon: It means the eyebot shoots a laser at her for 5 damage.
Bear Soup Guy: Also I didn't factor the -2 defense into my 12 damage
Ganelon: Nah, that's to being hit.
Not to damage taken.
Bear Soup Guy: Oh, excellent
Ganelon: It would be Vulnerable (something) 2 otherwise
Bear Soup Guy: Ah, right-o
Firehawk + Eyebot. Terrifying.
Apheori (GM): Dun dun dun.
Anything else?
Shouting? Pointing and laughing? Filling the bong with something else?
Bear Soup Guy: A yellow and luminous substance that appears gooey and slightly hairy
Greibel takes a large hit and rolls to save
Is that a D10 or a D20?
Apheori (GM): Eeew.
Frezak (GM): D20
10 or higher removes the effect.
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20
(
9
)
=
9
Curses
Greibel: WHOOOOOO! HOLES IN THE UNIVERSE!
Greibel coughs for about thirty seconds
Apheori (GM): Amadi's up.
Dude, that's several turns. XD
That said, I can see it happening.
Bear Soup Guy: Greibel can cough and take a turn. He's /very/ experienced.
Apheori (GM): Exactly.
Ganelon: By the rules, Amadi is unconscious and dying.
Apheori (GM): What does unconscious and dying do?
Ganelon: Unconscious means she basically can't act on her turn.
Ellemerr: I'll roll a death save.
Ganelon: Dying means she's got to roll saving throws to not bleed out.
Ellemerr:
rolling 1d20
(
8
)
=
8
Ganelon: Also saving throws against the usual stuff, like that slow.
Ellemerr: Oh? Okay, I'll roll that, too. I failed my death save.
rolling 1d20
(
18
)
=
18
I saved the slow. :P
Apheori (GM): >.<
Ganelon: Yeah, those don't just go away because you passed out.
Apheori (GM): Well, that's something, at least.
Ganelon: Ah, don't worry.
I can give you minimal amounts of healing right now.
Because this isn't an Artificer's job, damnit! It's a Cleric's!
Ellemerr: I have three "strikes" for my dying. If I fail three times I'm dead.
If I roll a 20 I spring to my legs.
Apheori (GM): Does anything else happen with the dying thing?
Ganelon: Radek tosses an infusion at Amadi, presuming her corpse isn't acting funny.
Ellemerr: I think that's all.
Ganelon: Well, you're straight-up dead if you have your bloodied value in negative HP.
Apheori (GM): Her corpse is just... lying there.
It looks a little fuzzy.
Ganelon: That's good, expected corpse behaviour.
Apheori (GM): But it's not quite glowing.
Ganelon: She gets to heal as if she spent a surge, +2.
(To Greibel): It's totally glowing.
Ganelon: She doesn't spend a surge because this is donated blood!
(From Bear Soup Guy): Oooo, fun
Ganelon: This also means she's conscious.
Frezak (GM): I think it's Gravy.
Ganelon: Good luck, uh... staying that way. That's Gravy's job, now.
Well, okay. I can do a little more for you.
Frezak (GM): I AM DOING THE BEST I CAN
Apheori (GM): Amadi is now unambiguously alive, but she still looks fuzzy.
Like kind of out of focus or something.
Ganelon: Radek summons his SECOND ROBOT, right about here.
I need to figure out what this one looks like.
Gaurav: Can you delay your turn if you're dying? It might be useful to move to just after your healer in the initiative order.
Ganelon: You cannot.
Gaurav: Interesting.
Frezak (GM): It's actually an action to delay.
Ganelon: Good enough, that robot.
Radek now retreats out of the sight of all those people with the capacity to kill him.
Gaurav: Huh! I didn't know that. And that's an awesome robot.
Bear Soup Guy: With the Scooby Doo exaggerated running animation
Ganelon: Shadows may take their turns.
Apheori (GM): Greibel is very good at friendly fire.
Ganelon: But let it be known that this 'bot is a full-fledged combatant and also highly volatile if destroyed.
Bear Soup Guy: Did I hit a teammate?
Also, what provokes opportunity attacks again?
Apheori (GM): Naw, I'm just looking at your skills.
Frezak (GM): Normal movement and ranged attacks.
Bear Soup Guy: Oh, yes XD
Movement adjacent to me, or just any movement that isn't a shift?
Ganelon: If someone moves within your threatened range (adjacent).
So if you walk up to a guy, you're safe.
If you walk up to him and then one square in any direction, you're not.
Bear Soup Guy: Got it
Apheori (GM): What's an area burst 1 look like?
Ganelon: 3x3.
Frezak (GM): It's a 3X3
Apheori (GM): Ranged attacks are the bow icon?
Ganelon: Correct.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Thank you.
I am so sorry for all of this.
Ganelon: Hey, I got an excuse to summon robots.
Frezak (GM): I got to be a tree of war.
Ellemerr: I got dead!
Bear Soup Guy: I have a very important question
Ganelon: At this point Radek can have a seat, pull up his portable computer, and just patch straight into the Eyebot feed.
Bear Soup Guy: Is Shadow Greibel smoking a shadow bong?
Ganelon: It's like playing a video game where your player character is a fire-spitting robot and your camera shoots deadly lasers.
Apheori (GM): BSG: Perception please.
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20+11
(
17
)
+11
=
28
Apheori (GM): He doesn't seem to be smoking anything, except the entire shadow Greibel has the same sort of essence as the bong. It's like he is smoking stuff, just without the stuff, and without actually using anything to do it.
If that makes any sense at all.
Bear Soup Guy: He's infused with the essence of drugs
Greibel is jealous
Apheori (GM): He also shifts back behind the real Amadi.
Gaurav: He *is* drugs.
Bear Soup Guy: DON'T TWIST THE KNIFE FURTHER, GAUR
Apheori (GM): And uses pure druggy darkness to summon faerie fire around the robot.
Ganelon: FOOL.
THE ROBOT IS AFFECTED EXACTLY LIKE A NORMAL PERSON.
Apheori (GM): How so?
I mean, why wouldn't it be?
Ganelon: It rolls against Radek's defenses.
Eh, I dunno. These things are honestly kinda crap.
Frezak (GM): You know what isn't crap?
CODRICHUN
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You realise the shadow is focused entirely on Amadi.
Okay, roll to hit everyone separate?
Frezak (GM): uh-huh
Apheori (GM): Thanks. I forgot how this works again.
rm 1d20 + 7 vs robot will
rolling 1d20 + 7 vs robot will
(
16
)
+7
=
23
rolling 1d20 + 7 vs gravy will
(
15
)
+7
=
22
rolling 1d20 + 7 vs amadi will
(
5
)
+7
=
12
Bahahahah.
Ellemerr: Miss on Amadi.
(To Ellemerr): He missed the only one he was actually aiming for. XD
(To Ellemerr): Well done.
Apheori (GM): Same roll for damage on all of them?
Ganelon: Correct, but does this even do damage?
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d6 + 4 on amadi
(
6
)
+4
=
10
Yes.
rolling 3d6 + 4 on the other two
(
3
+
1
+
5
)
+4
=
13
Bear Soup Guy: It does a lot of damage
Apheori (GM): ...well, it CAN do a lot of damage.
Bear Soup Guy: Yes :D
Ganelon: Okay.
So the robot only has 10 HP, meaning it dies.
Bear Soup Guy: Interestingly enough, the actual damage on that power is listed as an after effect of a hit
Ganelon: Meaning it explodes.
Bear Soup Guy: Does that have any relevance beyond being weird?
Ganelon: Yes, it absolutely does.
Apheori (GM): Oh.
What?
Ganelon: That means that the effect happens, and when you save against it, the damage happens.
Apheori (GM): Oooh.
Bear Soup Guy: Ah, yes
So no damage yet
I remember this now
Apheori (GM): So nevermind on the damage on Gravy and the robot.
Amadi was outright missed, though, so she takes the 10.
Bear Soup Guy: Indeed
Apheori (GM): And grants combat advantage until the end of shadow greibel's next turn.
Bear Soup Guy: And Gravy and Robot are slowed and grant CA until they save and explode
Apheori (GM): Oookay.
Sorry about that.
Bear Soup Guy: I made the same mistake last time I used that power
It's misleading
Apheori (GM): Heh. >.<
Yeah.
Does Amadi have any weapons?
Ellemerr: Er...
Ganelon: Since I can't put icons on my drawings, the robot is now on fire.
Frezak (GM): That's pretty metal.
Ellemerr: Realistically, I'd say no. Her sheet probably says otherwise.
Ganelon: If you'd prefer a more faerie-coloured fire, go ahead and suggest one.
Ellemerr: GREEN
Apheori (GM): GREEN.
Ellemerr: AND PURPLE
Apheori (GM): AND GREEN.
Frezak (GM): AND PURPLE
Apheori (GM): WITH SOME BLUE.
Frezak (GM): AND GREEN
Apheori (GM): AND PURPLE.
Ellemerr: MAYBE SPECTS OF GOLD
Frezak (GM): AND PURPLE
Ellemerr: specs*
Apheori (GM): YES.
Frezak (GM): *specks
Ganelon: Wow, you three.
Ellemerr: Aaaawesome
Apheori (GM): Ellemerr: The sheet says longsword. XD
Bear Soup Guy: I could see that
Ellemerr: I think it's realistic to say she attacks with whatever she wants, whenever she wants.
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Does Radek's basic attack do a lot of damage?
Can you kill something by damaging it a lot?
Ganelon: Yes and yes.
Well, hold on.
BASIC attack?
Because Radek's ranged basic attack is a 1d10+1 and it's highly inaccurate.
Apheori (GM): Amadi: The shadow Amadi is grinning at you viciously. You see teeth. Lots of teeth. Coming at you.
Gan: >.<
Ganelon: Because it relies on dexterity.
You can kill something by making it have its bloodied value in negative HP or lower.
Apheori (GM): Is the basic attack for a monster the first one, or what?
Ganelon: For a monster, it should be circled.
Frezak (GM): On monsters its the circled power.
Apheori (GM): Circled icon?
Frezak (GM): On players, it's math.
Apheori (GM): Math?
Frezak (GM): Yeah, strength on melee, dex on ranged.
Apheori (GM): Ah.
Frezak (GM): ONly Gravy has a decent Melee Basic.
Apheori (GM): And my gravy is dead.
*sniff*
Ooookay, you all are really... scary.
Ganelon: PCs are scary, yes.
Frezak (GM): AT least we didn't get Shadow Codrichun.
Apheori (GM): That would have ended the universe.
Ganelon: They generally have an unreasonably high capacity to deal damage if specialized in it.
Apheori (GM): If they could do that, they wouldn't even be trying to take your key.
Ganelon: If you saw what I could do with an Assassin...
Well, let's just say we'd be killing that shadow first.
Amusingly they normally have stuff to do with shadows.
You could have a shadow assassin in Shade Form using Shadowstep to teleport around.
Apheori (GM): Okay, shadow Amadi takes a step back too and uses staggering note on other amadi and probably gets hit with a shovel for her efforts, no?
Frezak (GM): not if she just shifts away.
Oh, wait.
Yeah, on a shift I use my Combat Superiority
To thwack
Ganelon: Eyebot says "please hit".
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+9
(
14
)
+9
=
23
AC
And she still has my -2
Apheori (GM): Yeah, that hits.
Ganelon: It adds a "thank you" in the form of a laser for 5 damage.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D10+5
(
8
)
+5
=
13
Apheori (GM): Oh, wait, she can't shift, nevermind.
Ganelon: She can.
Apheori (GM): I forgot about Griebel.
Ganelon: It's just enemies who can't near him, or so I should hope.
Apheori (GM): Oh, right.
The one exception to his targetting everything... >.>
Okay.
Ganelon: So she takes 5 and 13 and does some singing.
Apheori (GM): As a free action she has her George shoot the other Amadi...
Wait, needs to hit first?
Frezak (GM): Uhhh
Ganelon: The Bard power?
Frezak (GM): Staggering Note is only Melee Basic attacks.
Apheori (GM): Right, sorry.
Oh, right.
She probably doesn even hit...
rolling 1d20 + 6 vs amadi will
(
14
)
+6
=
20
Ellemerr: hit
Frezak (GM): and -2 from my mark.
Ellemerr: Still hit.
Ganelon: Also, it's ranged vs. prone, I think?
Ellemerr: Oh, then it's not hit.
Ganelon: Welcome to 4E combat.
Modifiers to everything.
Apheori (GM): She hisses something horrible.
Frezak (GM): Eh.
(To Greibel): She said, "I want it DEAD!"
(To Amadi): She said, "I want it DEAD!"
Ganelon: Shadow Rhu. Prone and probably gonna die.
Apheori (GM): Save is d20?
Ganelon: End of his turn, yes.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 for samadi
(
8
)
=
8
Shadow Rhu gets up and...
AGH WHAT IS THIS CHARACTER SHEET?!
Ellemerr: The last word Shadow-Amadi hissed echoes out of real Amadi. Like her corpse is shouting it back at miss Shadow.
Gaurav: It was free, is what it was.
Ganelon: Hey, you're not a corpse!
Greibel looks visibly shaken
Frezak (GM): You're not dead!
Ellemerr: Doh! But it does that without speech.
Frezak (GM): Just Veeeery nearly.
Apheori (GM): You should actually shout it.
Ellemerr is totally paying attention.
Ellemerr: FINE.
Apheori (GM): GAURAV: Do you have range? What's your range?
Amadi shouts the last hissed word back at Shadow-Amadi, making it sound ominously like an echo.
Frezak (GM): Probably no more than 5.
Gaurav: Most of my attacks are ranged 10.
Well, Rhu's.
Ganelon: I thought you were a melee guy primarily with some ranged powers.
Like the daily you used last - that was ranged.
Apheori (GM): What with a range of at least 4 and is relatively likely to hit?
Also what's the deal with the oath thing?
Gaurav: It's a mix between ranged and melee, but I got plenty of both.
Ganelon: Huh.
Apheori (GM): I can't read your character sheet so I need you to tell me all.
Gaurav: Rhu can make an Oath of Enmity against one enemy in close burst 10. The Oath can't be undone until the enemy dies or encounter ends. It lets you re-roll melee attacks.
Apheori (GM): Is that a minor or free action?
Gaurav: minor
Ganelon: Probably minor. But melee attacks mean it might not do much good.
Gaurav: "Relatively likely to hit" -- in my experience, they're all relatively likely to miss, so if you really want to hit, go for a daily.
Renewing Strike is ranged and lets you spend a healing surge as an effect. Oath of Consuming Light has an aftereffect.
Apheori (GM): Are there any minors that it would want to do instead of the oath?
Gaurav: Yeah, the more useful thing about the Oath of Enmity is that once an encounter, a party member can reroll any attack roll against your target.
Nope! The Oath of Enmity is the best.
Also: Rhu has an immediate reaction that lets him teleport 3 squares when an enemy hits or misses him with a melee attack.
Apheori (GM): Great. Shadow Rhu gets up and swears and oath of emnity on Amadi. You can't make out the actual words, but you think you can hear something and it sounds horrible.
Also I want insight from rhu.
Rhu: (to shadowRhu) Say what?
rolling d20+7 insight
(
5
)
+7
=
12
Apheori (GM): You're terrible.
Gaurav: Rhu sees nothing.
Apheori (GM): So if he really, really wants something dead, what would Rhu do?
Gaurav: Ooo
Apheori (GM): Suppose he has all the wrath of Hazz guiding him. That sort of wanting dead.
I'm asking because I have no idea what any of these skills do because the descriptions are all USELESS.
Gaurav: So given the not-hitting thing, if he was thinking straight, he'd make it a daily, BUT
Apheori (GM): What are the dailies?
Gaurav: Sequestering Strike is an encounter which lets him teleport someone up to 1+DEX (so 4 squares) away and teleport himself with them
That's his "this person is bad news and I want them away from my party" power
but, encounter. It does nothing if you miss.
Apheori (GM): What's his 'this person has angered my god and must die' power?
Gaurav: Don't really have one.
(To Ellemerr): I think shadow Amadi is shadow Rhu's god. It's already happening... on the other side. Or something.
Apheori (GM): Whaaaat.
Gaurav: Dailies: Renewing Strike (you get to spend a healing surge) and Oath of Consuming Light (lots of aftereffects)
Apheori (GM): What's the second one?
Frezak (GM): But, then, how do you know if you're happy? Or sad? Or ready for dessert?
Apheori (GM): Not with a face.
Gaurav: That's the one I hit shadowRhu with last round.
Apheori (GM): What did it do?
(From Amadi): WELL THAT SOUNDS JUST PEACHY
Gaurav: Oath of Consuming Light Avenger Attack 5
You place a burning mark of divine radiance on your foe as you swear an oath to destroy this creature. With every wound you inflict on the creature, the burning mark erupts in searing light.
Daily ✦ Divine, Implement, Radiant Standard Action Ranged 10 Target: One creature
Attack: Wisdom vs. Reflex
Hit: 2d10 + Wisdom radiant damage. Whenever you hit the target with a divine power, the target takes 1d6 extra radiant damage (save ends).
Aftereffect: Whenever you hit the target with a divine power, the target takes 1d4 extra radiant damage (save ends).
Gaurav: Miss: Half damage. Whenever you hit the target with a divine power, the target takes 1d4 extra radiant damage (save ends).
(To Amadi): AND SHE WANTS YOU DEAD.
Gaurav: So, lots of ow.
(To Amadi): Apparently so she can take your place or something? I don't even know.
Apheori (GM): Thank you.
That's ranged, right?
Right.
I can read.
Shadow Rhu does that at Amadi.
Gaurav: That's my favourite, unless you want the drama of him charging someone down and jumping them 4 squares away.
Apheori (GM): Waaait.
What's that one?
Ganelon: Nah, you can't do that.
Unless it specifies that you can as part of a charge.
Gaurav: Sequestering Strike. But that's an encounter, so it may fail, and I don't think shadowRhu has time for a second shot.
Ganelon: Since he needed to use a move action to stand up.
Apheori (GM): What's the description?
Gaurav: Yeah, that's a melee attack.
He can spend an AP.
Apheori (GM): Remember, shadow rhu isn't exactly in control of his... er... brains.
Which is to say he's a zombie.
ZOMBIE.
ZOMBIE ZOMBIE ZOMBIE.
But Rhu doesn't know that because Rhu is an idiot.
Ganelon: I'm assuming APs are the one thing they don't have over us.
Gaurav: Rhu's distracted!
Ganelon: Well, you know. And voices.
Gaurav: Sequestering Strike -> http://imgur.com/enl4czP
Apheori (GM): And Rhu completely failed to notice that his shadow only got up when the shadow screatched its horrible command.
Poor, poor Rhu.
What's Rhu's attack and damage with that?
Gaurav: That sounds like a terrible, terrible thing to notice.
Apheori (GM): And range.
Gaurav: Which one?
Apheori (GM): Sequestering.
Gaurav: Wisdom is d20+7, it's a melee so no range, and damage would be 2W with the maul, so ... 2(2d6)?
Ganelon: 4d6.
+Wis.
Gaurav: Oh, +WIS, so +3 I think
Apheori (GM): Okay, so you still need to start out next to it.
(To Amadi): Changelings sound scary.
Gaurav: The one advantage the Renewing Strike daily has is that you can spend a healing surge, which might help shadowRhu hang around long enough to get up to Amadi if he wants to Sequestering Strike her.
Apheori (GM): Nope, he just throws an oath of consuming light at her.
Except instead of being, well, light, it's actually quite dark for some reason.
Frezak (GM): YOU DONT SAY
Apheori (GM): I KNOW, RIGHT?
rolling 1d20 +7 vs amadi ac
(
9
)
+7
=
16
Gaurav: So that's d20 + Wisdom (7) vs Reflex
Apheori (GM): IS THAT RANGED?
Gaurav: yes, so it's against reflex, not AC
Apheori (GM): IT SAID AC.
Gaurav: Ranged 10
... are you looking at Sequestering Strike?
Apheori (GM): No.
Wait, that's ranged?
Gaurav: urk hang on
Frezak (GM): Consuming Light is the ranged one.
And that is against Reflex
Gaurav: Oath of Consuming Light -> http://imgur.com/XN53lpI
Amadi: Unless it's against fort it's a miss anyway.
Ellemerr: OOC.
... Probably.
Gaurav: It's a daily, so it still does half damage on a miss.
Apheori (GM): His character sheet clearly said AC.
His character sheet is horrible.
Please kill him quickly so I don't have to use it again.
Gaurav: Oh, right, so it does.
Weird.
An oath that literally breaks your armour would be kind of cool, though.
Ellemerr: Are you rolling that dmg so I can take half of it?
Apheori (GM): What do I roll, exactly? Just the usual?
Gaurav: 2d10 + wisdom (+3, without half-level) radiant damage
Apheori (GM): What's the three?
Gaurav: oh, sorry, +5 wisdom modifier
I forgot how wise Rhu was
Apheori (GM):
rolling 2d10 + 5
(
5
+
4
)
+5
=
14
7, then?
Gaurav: And then whenever you hit the target with a divine power, the target takes 1d4 extra radiant damage (save ends)
Apheori (GM): Even on miss?
Ellemerr: Downed again.
Gaurav: That's the miss variant. On a hit, it's 1d6, which then downgrades to a 1d4 after the save.
(To Ellemerr): All you need to do is take out the other Amadi.
Gaurav: Which shadowRhu needs to save against from Rhu's last attack at the end of his turn.
(To Ellemerr): ...you think? Or you would think if you weren't being so... dead.
(From Ellemerr): Gee, thanks. :P
(To Ellemerr): Although I really want that to happen while you are downed, because the results there would be hilariously awesome.
Apheori (GM): Oh.
rolling 1d20 srhu
(
10
)
=
10
Whazzat do?
Gaurav: I think 10 and above is a save?
Frezak (GM): Yeah.
Gaurav: Cool. So now any divine attacks I make against shadowRhu only cause 1d4 extra radiant damage
Apheori (GM): Does that have an effect on save to also damage him, or am I thinking of something of Greibel's?
Gaurav: Nope, that's all the saves shadowRhu needs to make for Rhu, and I don't think anyone else has hit him yet.
Ganelon: He's save for now. The Aftereffect on this is that it does less damage when triggered rather than vanishing completely.
And I'm sorry but that sleep I mentioned is starting to hit me harder.
This is certainly too early to stop, though...
Apheori (GM): Ah, okay.
Frezak (GM): Hag needs sleepytimes in about 30.
Apheori (GM): Rhu's up in the meantime.
Ellemerr nods.
Gaurav: Should Rhu keep beating up on shadowRhu, given that shadowRhu seems more interested in beating up on Amadi, or should Rhu charge into the mess with the rest of you and try to damage shadowAmadi/Greibel?
Ganelon: You'll get your oath usage back and have a better chance of hitting ShadowRhu.
Either way you have eyebot support.
Gaurav: Okay. I figure I might as well use up my second daily, then.
Renewing Strike on shadowRhu!
rolling d20+7 wisdom vs reflex on shadowRhu
(
15
)
+7
=
22
That's a hit, unless there's +/-s I've forgotten about.
rolling 2d10+5 lightning damage
(
6
+
9
)
+5
=
20
Ganelon: Also, eyebot does 5 and your mark does 1d4.
Gaurav: oh right
rolling 1d4
(
1
)
=
1
So 26 damage in all, and Rhu gets to spend a healing surge, which he does.
Apheori (GM): You just killed yourself.
Bear Soup Guy: Not uncharacteristic based on Rhu's track record
Gaurav: Huzzah!
Who are we focussing on next? I'll oath of enmity them.
Apheori (GM): There's another puddle.
Bear Soup Guy: Shadow Amadi seems to be particularly nasty, but Shadow Greibel hasn't been hurt as much
Gaurav: And: should I spend my AP and Whirlwind Charge someone?
Frezak (GM): move up and give me a flank on Shadow Amadi?
Just stepping up 1 would help me.
Gaurav: Done!
Frezak (GM): Ta!
Gaurav: So that's my standard and move. My minor is to Oath of Enmity this miserable excuse of a shadow Amadi. I'll hold on to my AP for now. End of turn!
Frezak (GM): I'm wondering whether I could punt the firedroid with a minor action?
Ganelon: To accomplish what?
It exploding?
Frezak (GM): Just have it get in the way and annoy teh shadows up top.
Ganelon: It's actually Small sized. Pretty big for a 'bot.
That would be very useful if you could, though.
Frezak (GM): eh, I'll just move to here.
What does the DM say?
About robot-punting?
Apheori (GM): Uh... you can.
But you need to roll punting.
Frezak (GM): Athletics?
Apheori (GM): Although I'm not sure it makes sense as a minor.
Frezak (GM): Gah
I can only spend a minor.
Apheori (GM): Not that any other minors do either.
So go ahead.
Athletics is fine.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+8
(
14
)
+8
=
22
Ganelon: It's like shotput, except this is a piece of valuable technology.
Apheori (GM): That works.
Frezak (GM): I'll shift.
Apheori (GM): Where do you want it?
Damages it a little, though.
Frezak (GM): that's fine.
Apheori (GM): Radek: 2 damage to the tincan.
Frezak (GM): I now use.... Roots Of Stone
Ganelon: These poor things are so fragile that I'm glad this one explodes.
Noted.
Frezak (GM): Sgreibel first, then Samadi
rolling 1D20+9
(
5
)
+9
=
14
rolling 1D20+9+2
(
7
)
+9+2
=
18
Without counting their -2 to defences from Codrichun
Apheori (GM): Yes on sAmadi, no on sGreibel.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D10+5
(
2
)
+5
=
7
And 5 extra laser damage.
If She tries to move away on her turn, she is knocked prone and takes 4 more damage.
And they are both marked.
Apheori (GM): Nope, she's dead.
The Gravedigger: GET OFF MY FRUIT
Apheori (GM): She and all the other remaining shadows all dissolve into sludge.
Frezak (GM): Oh.
Yay me.
Gaurav: Yay you!
Bear Soup Guy: She was the sludge queen!
Frezak (GM): Gravy grabs Amadi and runs up to Radek with her in his arms.
Apheori (GM): SLUUUUDGE.
Wait.
Wait wait wait.
The Gravedigger: Fixitfixitfixit
Apheori (GM): The sludge... does stuff.
Frezak (GM): Oh GOODY
Apheori (GM): So I dunno why I drew sludgeo n the map.
The sludge all flows toward Amadi and she absorbs a bunch of it. You manage to pick her up as this is happening, but there's sludge trailing down, pulling into the floor, all sticky-like, and more of it is still flowing up.
What do you do?
Frezak (GM): I do exactly what I said I would.
Apheori (GM): Aiight, the sludge follows you and keeps flowing into her as you go.
What touches you also hurts a bit.
Like... it's corrosive sludge. Or something.
The Gravedigger: Please?
Radek: Exactly which problem do you want me to /fix/!?
The Gravedigger: The lying dead like a ragdoll one?
Frezak (GM): I KILLED THINGS FOR YOU
George: So not the one in which she just absorbed all the... whatever that was?
Do we even know what that was?
The Gravedigger: Eh, that weirdness happens all the time.
Radek injects his second healing infusion into Amadi.
Radek: If that substance does anything close to what I imagine, this will be next to useless.
The Gravedigger: Well, I appreciate you helping.
Ganelon: But if he's wrong, she gets to heal up again.
Apheori (GM): What does he think it does?
Frezak (GM): If it DOES fail I'm tossing her into the water.
Ganelon: It heals wounds.
Gaurav: An astute plan.
Apheori (GM): No, the substance.
Ganelon: I suspect the sludge inflicts them much more efficiently.
Apheori (GM): Hmm.
Ganelon: If it's making her dead, he really lacks the means to stop it.
Apheori (GM): Nothing happens.
Do you want to try to take a sample before the rest of the sludge goes into Amadi and/or the floor?
Some of it did just sink into the floor.
Ganelon: Yes.
Very much yes.
I have gloves on (WIZARDING GLOVES) if that helps any.
Apheori (GM): Roll a d20.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
15
)
=
15
Apheori (GM): Yeah, that works fine.
Radek: I don't know how this works and I don't know how /she/ works.
(To Greibel): Doing anything with that bong of yours?
Radek holds up a vial of the sludge.
Radek: ...But I am certainly going to try and find out.
(From Bear Soup Guy): Holding it?
(To Greibel): The bong is weird. It's changed colour. It's black.
Frezak (GM): TO THE WATER
(To Greibel): AND GLEAMING.
Apheori (GM): Radek: Amadi looks pretty dead at this point.
Which is to say she looks perfectly normal, but she's not moving.
All the wounds from the fight are gone, though, for whatever reason.
Is Greibel just standing off to the side doing nothing at this point?
Rhu: I could try to bring Hazz' in on this, but ... [makes a Hazz'-isn't-exactly-reliable gesture]
Greibel walks up to the lake to try to shake out his bong
(To Rhu): YOU LOST HER.
Ganelon: Is the stuff in her system?
(To Rhu): YOU LOST THEM ALL.
Rhu brushes it aside.
Apheori (GM): Gan: Not that you can tell.
Try a medicking check.
Radek:
rolling 1d20+9 Heal
(
3
)
+9
=
12
Apheori (GM): Greibel: It seems to just be that the glass has changed. It's not dirty.
Ganelon: Baaaah!
Knowledge of medicine, you've betrayed me!
Apheori (GM): Radek: Everything looks... normal?
Except... dead.
Minor issue.
Greibel is unconvinced and tries to rinse it with the funky water
Bear Soup Guy: Unconvinced or a bit panicked
Apheori (GM): The dead Amadi burbles up some funky water.
Bear Soup Guy: That was his favorite bong! :(
Rhu walks over to the group watching Amadi.
(To Rhu): You feel an emptiness, a silence. It's a bit weird, but probably not important.
Radek: I a damned defibrillator, here. She's dead.
Ellemerr: Hells, time. I should be in bed. >.<
Ganelon: I need a*
Apheori (GM): Go to bed. You're dead anyway.
>.>
Frezak (GM): I hold her upside down to shake out the water.
Ellemerr: Feel free to... keep going until I can... do stuff, yeah? >.>
Frezak (GM): A good vigourous shaking
Apheori (GM): We shall end this with you on the ceiling.
Frezak (GM): I DONT KNOW WHAT ELSE TO DO
Ganelon: This is a nice cliffhanger to end on.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: The bong seems to be mostly okay. You just need to fix it somehow.
Ganelon: And I would also like to sleep.
Apheori (GM): Get the black back out of the glass.
Or get it so it's actually properly part of it?
Gravy gets all the water out.
Something something.
SLEEP FOR EVERYONE.
Bear Soup Guy: YAY D&D
Ganelon: Goodnight!
Apheori (GM): Good timing, tired people.
Very, very good timing.
I almost forgot the entire point of your being here AGAIN.
Gaurav: I shall invoke the awesome don't-do-much-i-ness of Hazz'ridan the Great ... next week.
Apheori (GM) runs around flailing.
Bear Soup Guy: Sweet dreams and pleasant day-time activities everyone!
Ellemerr: Sweet nightmares to all.
Gaurav: Bye, everybody!

Session 39

Apheori (GM): That last session was probably the 23 of november. This is 3 december.
WHERE IS ELLEMERR?
GANELON?
Well, I suppose we don't technically need Ellemerr, what with her character being dead, and all.
So Amadi's dead.
Frezak (GM): Hag won't be here until later.
Apheori (GM): Okay. What's Gan's excuse?
Gravy was shaking Amadi. Radek wanted a defibrillator, but couldn't he use his hands? And magic?
Bear Soup Guy: Defibrillator hands
He got them at insane old genius school
Gaurav: We should try to get Dave involved in this. Maybe she can talk some sense into deadAmadi, godling to godling.
Ganelon: Maybe if he was a wizard.
But he can't do electricity.
Gaurav: Gerbil could turn into an electric eel.
Apheori (GM): How does he do thundering armour? That seems shocking.
Bear Soup Guy: heh, Gerbil
Apheori (GM): Man, I didn't even catch that. O_o
Frezak (GM): It's thunder, not lightning.
Ganelon: Thunder is more like waves of invisible force, or just high-intensity sound.
Gaurav: Rhu had an attack with the lightning keyword, but he used it in the last encounter.
Ganelon: Lightning is, in fact, its own damage type.
And Radek has an encounter power to shoot someone with it, but that's really not going to help. It's not a measured amount.
Gaurav apologizes to Gerbil for misspelling his name
Ganelon: Much like how hooking up a dead person to the power grid does not bring them back to life. It just gives you an extra-crispy corpse.
Bear Soup Guy: I'm sure that Gerbil is sometimes right
when he needs to get under doors or into tight spaces
Apheori (GM): What, you got an autocorrect or something?
SWARM OF GERBILS.
Gaurav: Also: defibrillation can only kick a misfiring heart back into rhythm AFAIK. Once the heart stops entirely, it's time for chemicals.
Apheori (GM): Okay, so what do you all do? Amadi's dead. Gravy is shaking the water out of her. Radek wants a defibrillator.
Gaurav: Or Gravy punches. Or *something*.
Bear Soup Guy: Right you are, Gaur
Apheori (GM): Greibel has chemicals.
Frezak (GM): I don't think that Gravy's fists can solve this.
Apheori (GM): You could have your characters stand around arguing about how to bring someone back to life.
I'd like to see this.
Gaurav: Can Rhu pray to Dave, or somehow invoke Dave through a religion check? He'd shout her name, but I don't think it'd carry in this cave.
Bear Soup Guy: Gravy's fists might break her
Gaurav: I apologize for all typos in advance, I've been sleeping terribly all week and last night was no exception.
Frezak (GM): I'm going to make Amadi into sandwiches.
Gaurav: Can we put her soul somewhere in the meantime? Or is to too late for soul extraction?
Frezak (GM): It's what she'd want.
Apheori (GM): The religion skill is primarily about knowledge more than your actual skill at summoning gods. But you've applied that knowledge successfully in the past...
I seriously do want to see the characters just start arguing about how to bring someone back to life, though.
Can you do that? Respond to Radek's comment.
*kitty eyes*
Also, Guarav etc: Don't ask to do skills. Just do whatever you want to try to do. Roll it and say what it is. Worst that will happen is something horrible.
Frezak: So you make her into sandwiches?
Frezak (GM): I'd need some really big bits of bread, I think.
Rhu: (to Radek) What about the robots? Don't they have electrical ... wires and things?
rolling d20+14 perception check on the footsteps: do they go back the way we came, through the secret door, or is there another way out of here
(
19
)
+14
=
33
Radek: ...
Gaurav: footprints*
Apheori (GM): Remind me what footprints these are, and what secret door? >.<
Radek: I don't have enough time to jury rig something like that when she's /already dead/.
Rhu: What about her soul? Can you save that in some way, like you did for Mr. Mousie?
Ganelon: Good question, actually.
George: You sure she's dead? That stuff went into her.
Ganelon: Is that a matter of Arcana, though?
Frezak (GM): I want t bury her in extradimensional space.
Apheori (GM): Totally arcana.
Radek:
rolling 1d20+12 Arcana
(
18
)
+12
=
30
Ganelon: Does she even have a soul?
Gaurav: She was burbling up funky water a minute ago: "The dead Amadi burbles up some funky water."
Ganelon: I feel like we're making a lot of assumption about how the godling works here.
Apheori (GM): Radek: You don't manage to do what you meant to do, but you do discover that whatever she has/had, there's horrible blackness in the way. Hungry blackness. It sees you.
Gaurav: Assumptions is all we got! It's a medicoreligious emergency!
Apheori (GM): Gaurav: ARE THERE ANY FOOTPRINTS OR SECRET DOORS?
Or are you just messing with me?
Is Gravy still holding Amadi?
Gaurav: I'm trying to find them! Okay, we definitely came through a secret door to find this cave.
Frezak (GM): Gravy is still holding Amadi.
Apheori (GM): You came in through a natural cave entrance. O_o
Gaurav: That Rhu found. Because he's awesome like that.
Apheori (GM): Oh, earlier on?
Radek: Damn it...
Apheori (GM): That was at the top of the main cavern. You're probably several hundred feet down now.
Gaurav: Yup, that one. I thought there was something about footprints somewhere but I guess not.
Radek: No, Rhu, I cannot save her soul, because this /darkness/ is in the way.
Rhu gives Radek a quizzical look
Rhu: You mean like the darkness-beast thing in Midnight?
Ganelon: I dunno, does it seem similar?
Apheori (GM): Gravy: Amadi wakes up and starts struggling.
It seems to be trying to bite Radek.
Frezak (GM): I slam Amadi against the wall a few times.
The Gravedigger: No bitey!
No!
Bad Amadi!
Apheori (GM): Rhu: From your perception check, you can't really tell if there are footprints in here or not (that ain't your own), but you do notice that there seem to be lighter patches on the floor where the black stuff sank in... and there are too many of them.
Gaurav: Years from now, we're going to be sitting in an inn laughing about the day Gravy bashed a godling into a wall.
Apheori (GM): Okay, Amadi gets a bit crushed.
Gaurav: Lighter = less hairy?
Apheori (GM): The hairs are longer.
Radek tugs on his beard in frustration.
Radek: Why, yes. Quite a bit like that.
You may recall that none of us had a solution then, and things have not changed since.
Apheori (GM): Gravy: Amadi stops struggling and glares at you with horrible black eyes.
Rhu tries to touch the longer hairs
Apheori (GM): Touching them does nothing.
Rhu:
rolling d20+14 perception check on the longer hairs
(
11
)
+14
=
25
Does ... anybody else see patches all over the floor, or is that my blindness acting up again?
Apheori (GM): They look like longer hairs. Longer seems to indicate lighter. Or perhaps shorter. They seem to be outlines of people...
Rhu: (to Radek, distractedly) Um ... Codrichun helped? Maybe ...
Rhu stops talking and stares at the outlines of people
Apheori (GM): Amadi hisses something and then Dave appears.
Dave looks very, very confused.
Well, Dawn, I mean.
Gaurav: Are they outlines evenly spaced throughout the room, or are they clustered around the pool or where the shadows died? Are they just standing about or doing something?
Radek: Ah, fantastic.
Apheori (GM): Just all over. Look like folks fell over and got burned into the floor. Sorta. There seem to be about eight altogether.
Radek: Hello, Dave. We were just about to debate the merits of having your better half possessed by a demon in the hopes that it might destroy the entity currently possessing her.
Do you have any insight on this matter?
Dawn pokes Amadi.
Dawn: You know, it is a bit like a demon.
Hi, demon. How are you?
Amadi hisses something silent and unintelligible, looking quite upset.
Dawn: Sorry, but if you're not her, I'm not doing what you want.
Um...
Why are you all looking at me like I should know what to do?
The Gravedigger: Hey, I wasn't.
Rhu: What's she asking you to do?
Dawn: Radek here is a lot of everyone, okay?
She just wants me to destroy you all.
Rhu: Oh, okay.
Dawn: Weren't we supposed to be immune to this? How much have we lost...?
Gravedigger, hold her still, please. I got an idea.
Radek: Just... leave me out of this. I am not an exorcist.
Apheori (GM): Can an avenger still do divine stuff if pissed at their god?
...and the feeling is mutual?
Dawn takes Amadi's head in her hands and then headbutts her really hard.
Ganelon: I don't have an answer for that within the rules.
Dawn reels away, tears streaming down her face, saying "ow ow ow ow ow."
Apheori (GM): ...and that was her idea.
Gaurav: PHB2 strongly suggests that the answer is no, that avenger powers are prayers that are answered by your god, not divine power channelled by you.
Apheori (GM): Okay, thanks. Don't let me forget.
The Gravedigger: I can do that too.
Ganelon: No divine class channels power from itself. Only the race, Devas, can do that.
And it's because they're former angels or something.
Apheori (GM): And Dave. Dave can do that.
Well, Dawn.
I do recall something about pally powers being more faith-based than actual prayers, though. So they could still work so long as there's faith, even if the god is gone...
But those ain't avengers.
I dunno.
Gravy: DO you do that too?
Rhu: Is that the shadow Amadi in there? Where is Amadi? Maybe she's ... elsewhere. I feel a silence that I haven't felt before.
Frezak (GM): No, I do not.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 + 7 against rhu will
(
9
)
+7
=
16
Frezak (GM): Can I just dump this creature in the Elemental Plane Of Sandwiches?
Apheori (GM): Does that succeed?
Gaurav: Nope! 18 Will.
Apheori (GM) mumbles something incoherent about saves.
Apheori (GM): Aiight, she says something horrible Rhu can just make out the words 'All of us'.
Gaurav: Ha! I kinda want to try to intimidate this daemon horde thing. Does anybody have good intimidate?
Rhu:
rolling d20+9 religion check to exorcise daemons
(
8
)
+9
=
17
Frezak (GM): Gravy's intimidate is... 6.
Now, if you just want me to stare really hard at them, THAT I can do.
Gaurav: It's worth a shot. You've already slammed her into the wall once.
Ganelon: Radek is precisely as intimidating as a weak old man.
Apheori (GM): Can Radek find the elemental plane of sandwiches?
Ganelon: Sure, if it exists.
Frezak (GM): OF COURSE IT EXISTS
Apheori (GM): Well, if Gravy wants it, he'd have to get your help, then.
Gaurav: Greibel: what are you up to?
Apheori (GM): Gravy: What do you do?
Frezak (GM): Sandwich is clearly an element.
Bear Soup Guy: Greibel's fidgeting with his bong
Rhu: Have we tried using the Orb of Protection thing? Maybe it'll scare these things away.
Frezak (GM): Gravy is still holding Amadi right now.
He's not going to suggest the Sandwich Plane if he can't do it himself.
The Gravedigger: You say there are demons in Amadi?
Apheori (GM): He doesn't know how to do it, I'm afraid.
Radek: It repels energy, Rhu.
Rhu: The darkness thing might be energy.
The Gravedigger lifts up Amadi to shout really loudly in her ear.
The Gravedigger: GET OUT DEMONS! SHOOOO
Dawn: They're not demons, just like demons.
They're also not really... multiple, either.
Apheori (GM): Gravy: Want to roll intimidate?
Frezak (GM): Eh, why not.
rolling 1D20+6
(
11
)
+6
=
17
Apheori (GM): Man, these character sheets are amazing.
Gaurav: Greibel: Do you have any anti-demonic powers? If not, would you mind doing a survey of the cave system, maybe as a flock of bats or something? It might be useful to find a way out if we need to.
Radek: ...Allow me to elaborate.
If it were capable of solving this problem for us, it would just as easily expel your soul from your body the instant you came into contact with it.
Greibel: Groovy
Rhu: Oh.
Greibel: You'd like traveling the astral plane, Rhu
It's freaky at first but then it's /freaky/
Um, right...cave survey
Apheori (GM): Gravy: There's a bit of a struggle in Amadi, but it seems to have worked: she calms down, looks a bit confused, and then starts speaking perfectly normally again.
Greibel turns into bats and flies away
Apheori (GM): Well, relatively normally, anyway.
Rhu: Do we even know that Amadi is still in there? Maybe she's gone back to Midnight or something.
Frezak (GM): THERE IS NO NORMAL FOR AMADI
Amadi: Agh! What?
Oh! It worked!
The Gravedigger: HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT SANDWICHES?
Amadi: They're... nice, I suppose?
The Gravedigger: DECEIVER!
Amadi: Eh?!
The Gravedigger shakes Amadi vigorously.
The Gravedigger: OUT DEMONS OUT
Amadi: No, no, I'm not a demon.
I'm... okay, this is going to sound completely insane, but I'm possessing the... demon. Stuff.
Which is apparently possessing your friend.
Rhu: You're ... *stronger* than the demon possessing Amadi?
Amadi: Well... not really. But you guys did apparently give it a bit of a jostle...
Or something.
The Gravedigger: I shouted really loudly.
Amadi: My name is Haerevan of Salas Vittan. I came here to give you something, though I'm not entirely sure how to entirely go about that at this stage.
Odd.
Frezak (GM): Does that name mean anything to anyone?
Amadi: Your shouts transcend the normal barriers of reality?
The Gravedigger: It was really loud.
Rhu: Don't shout really loudly at it again, this person makes more sense than Amadi usually does.
The Gravedigger: Aw.
Okay.
Rhu:
rolling d20+4 history check on "Salas Vittan" and/or "Haerevan"
(
14
)
+4
=
18
Apheori (GM): The name is the same pattern as the names given for the kings. Anyone who was paying attention might remember that.
Well, if they're like smart and stuff.
Frezak (GM): I'm smart!
Apheori (GM): Rhu doesn't know anything about that one in particular.
Rhu: We've been told that we are on Arling Tor, although that was several leaps through space and time ago.
I think that was another planet.
Amadi: Yes, this is Arling Tor.
(to Gravy) Can you put me down, please? I don't think anything too horrible is going to happen.
The Gravedigger: Hmmm.
I'll be watchking.
*watching
The Gravedigger puts the creature down.
Gaurav: King of All Watches
Amadi: (nodding) I would expect nothing less.
The Gravedigger: I can also watch really hard.
Rhu: (to Amadi) How did you end up in Amadi, then? Did Gravy's shout call you? Were you just ... passing?
George: Is Arling Tor another name for Cerris?
Amadi: Well, I was really trying to hitch a ride through the rift, but got a bit caught up in all the shadowstuff.
This wasn't exactly my first idea, you know.
And no, Arling Tor is all of this. It includes Cerris, and Ord, and all the other fragments you call planes as well.
Rhu: Shadowstuff? We were just fighting shadows a minute ago.
Amadi: The extent of the universe is the name, and beyond that, other universes have their own names.
The Gravedigger: I hit them really hard.
Amadi: They must have been given some sort of medium with which to manifest,
A...
Amadi holds out her hand and a ball of light appears over it.
Amadi: ...creation.
Gaurav: Does the sudden light hurt our delicate elven eyes?
Apheori (GM): Naw, it's not that bad.
Wait, do you have any lights at all?
Maybe it does.
I can't remember.
Frezak (GM): I think we all have magic elf-vision.
Apheori (GM): Oh.
I guess it's a bit bright, but not so much so as to hurt you.
It throws weird shadows everywhere, though.
Rhu: ... that might not be the best idea. Weird shadows are how our friend died. Or didn't die. Or whatever.
Amadi: All light casts shadows. A good light creates nothing to be feared.
Rhu: (to Amadi) Do you know anything about Holes and Darkness Made Solid, where you're from? We seem to be having problems with both today.
Rhu clearly doesn't buy this, and glances warily at the shadows from time to time.
Radek fidgets and grumbles in the background.
Amadi: The holes are the deterioration of the universe, spread by contact with other universes. Your own was particularly badly damaged, which is how you came here.
Amadi fiddles with the ball, making it do various nonsensical things, trying to reshape it.
Rhu: To this planet? Or this cave?
Amadi: To Arling Tor.
And Cerris.
(to George) You know they're aliens, right?
They're totally aliens.
George: Um... okay?
Gaurav: We prefer "space elves", thank you very much.
Frezak (GM): "No, I have birth certificate, not fake."
"No alien, no"
Radek: ...Is that remarkable in this universe?
Rhu: (to George) Well, we're from another planet. We were on another planet, then another one, and then we were nowhere, and then we got here.
Amadi shrugs.
Dawn: Space aliens would be a bit odd here, I think. Ord is the one where they get that.
But she means in that you're from another universe.
(to not Amadi) You're an Emissary, aren't you?
Apheori (GM): The ball of light turns into a ball of sludge and starts dripping.
Amadi: Agh! This is not working.
The Gravedigger stares.
Amadi gives Gravy a nervous look.
Radek: What, exactly, are you trying to do with that?
Amadi: I'm trying to recreate an object that was... destroyed.
Except I don't entirely know what I'm doing.
You know, we're supposed to have the power of gods and then some, but it's like I never got all the memos or something. I'm not even close to a god.
I'm a baker, for crying out loud!
Amadi shakes some gloop off her hand.
Amadi: ...I should have really let someone else take this one.
It was supposed to be a box. Full of stuff. And a letter. About the box. I'm trying to remake it and it's just not working.
Rhu: Are you ... sure ... we're in another universe? There are a lot of planets, you know. We might just be stuck on a particularly primitive planet. No offence, George.
Amadi: From where you started out? Yes. Definitely different.
You're from Arikdirin Vak.
Frezak (GM): What did the magical teleporting lady give us?
Rocks, was it?
Amadi: I can tell THAT much, at least.
Apheori (GM): Yeah, little stones with carvings on them.
Gaurav: They should be in Greibel and Rhu's inventory.
Radek waves a hand dismissively.
Bear Soup Guy: They sure are
Radek: It hardly matters any longer.
Dawn: You're in a piece of a King. Full of Midnight. Of course it wouldn't work properly.
Amadi stops and stares at Dawn.
Amadi: A King?
Dawn: I... don't know. Maybe?
Gaurav: (to Dawn) Midnight! Do you think taking Amadi back to Midnight might help her kick this darkness thing out?
Er, IC, sorry.
Rhu: ... No, on second thoughts, the darkness-monster thing seems to be even more powerful there.
Dawn: No, no, the emissary should be able to get it out once he finishes what he's doing.
Rhu: ... Oh. Cool.
Ganelon: Should that make sense to me?
Because it doesn't.
Apheori (GM): Naw.
Gaurav: Which bit?
Apheori (GM): I think.
I don't even know.
Gaurav: We know that It is Ajirahd and Irundha of Akrikdirin Vak who reign king of the sandcastle. So maybe that's the King they mean? And we've been to Midnight.
Apheori (GM): She's trying to force some magic and it's not working.
Amadi drops an ooze on the ground and it starts bouncing away.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+3 Religion to spout zen sayings about calm
(
16
)
+3
=
19
Amadi glares at it angrily.
Gaurav: If that's an arcana check, maybe Radek can help? They could exchange jargon checks or something.
Amadi glares at Gravy.
Amadi calms down a bit.
Apheori (GM): Yeah, actually, which bit?
Most of it really shouldn't make sense.
The thing about trying to recreate a specific object might mean something to Radek. He was, in a way, trying to do quite similar with his reality bomb.
Also, whoever brought up the rocks was spot on. You should totally use them.
Or drug Amadi.
Frezak (GM): "use" them?
Apheori (GM): Or get Radek to show her how to actually do science.
Apheori (GM) shrugs.
Apheori (GM): OR ALL OF THE ABOVE.
OR something else.
Gaurav: We should dunk Amadi in the funky water until her situation improves.
Frezak brought up the stones. Rhu is way too thick to think of them right now, although that other idea ...
Rhu: (to Amadi) Radek knows how to build things! Check out that eyebot! And that robot on flames! Maybe he can help you?
The Gravedigger: You got a /box/ ?
We just got some scribbled rocks that some crazy teleporting lady shoved at us.
Ganelon: The robot is probably just a wide burn mark on the floor by now.
The Gravedigger: What's it like, being a baker?
Amadi: No, I don't have the box. That's the problem/
It got destroyed. Well, more 'unmade'.
Scribbled how?
The Gravedigger: I dunno, they had squigglies.
Who has the rocks?
Rhu: We got the scribbled rocks from multiple sources. otherAmadi gave me one right before I ended up in the city of the dead and found a sphinx! (takes out the two rocks he has and shows them to Amadi)
Greibel has the others, but I think he's still several bats.
Amadi: Baking is nice. Calming. No stress, no problems bigger than I am.
Rhu: Unless you make a very large cake.
Amadi: Cakes are NOT problems.
The Gravedigger: Unless they've caught in fire.
I dig graves.
I have never buried a cake.
Yet.
Gaurav: I am going to be very disappointed if Gravy doesn't get to bury a cake by the end of this campaign.
Radek: Hmph.
Frezak (GM): Great, now we're going to fight a cakebeast.
Were-cake
Amadi: I could bake you some coffins later if you'd like.
I mean, if you're ever in the area.
Gaurav: *Were-cake*
Amadi gestures for Rhu to hand over the rocks.
Radek: I suppose you're trying to bake an object into existence too, is that it?
Gaurav: 29 days it sits in a diner never appearing to get stale, then on the 30th it turns into a man.
Rhu hands them over.
Ganelon: Could I just...
Cast Make Whole on this ball of sludge?
Rhu: GREIBEL! Where are you?
Amadi looks at Radek skeptically.
Amadi: Would that... work?
Apheori (GM): What does make whole do?
Gaurav: You might end up with a whole ball of sludge, but at the least that might help Haerevan start over.
Frezak (GM): It repairs broken objects, basically.
Amadi looks the rocks over, goes, "Oh... oh!" and then hastily hands them back.
Apheori (GM): Hmm.
Ganelon: Make Whole does exactly as it sounds.
It fixes things.
Returns mundane objects to their... well, I can't say original state.
Apheori (GM): So it won't fix the molecular composition of something that isn't what it's supposed to be, I take it.
Rhu: (to Amadi) What? Have you seen them before?
Ganelon: It would fix a broken sign, or door.
Even if all the parts weren't present.
Amadi: Well, no, but these also shouldn't exist, so that actually helps quite a bit.
Hold on.
Ganelon: I suppose Radek will just watch.
Amadi makes another glowy ball and starts fiddling with that one.
Amadi makes some progress and then gets stuck again.
Amadi: Well, this is... closer.
Apheori (GM): It's lumpy and vaguely box-shaped.
Gaurav: We could try making assist rolls. I'm hesitant to call Hazz' but that is also an option.
George: The pinnacle of creation.
Frezak (GM): Gravy remains alert in case of anything that needs burying.
Apheori (GM): You could go find that ooze that bounced off and bury that.
Greibel bats congregate in the air and mush together, Greibel falls down with a thump
Greibel: What was I looking for, again?
Frezak (GM): I BURY THE OOZE
Rhu: A way out, I think.
Apheori (GM): The ooze makes sad noises as it is burried.
Greibel: Oh, right
Radek grumbles quietly.
Radek: ...Bloody divines have it so easy and they still can't do anything right.
Greibel: Did I find one?
Rhu: Also, Haerevan expressed an interest in the stones we've found. The ones with symbols on them.
Amadi: I am most certainly NOT a divine.
You take that back!
Greibel: Here, take em
Greibel shoves his pack at Rhu
Apheori (GM): The pack is a mimic.
Rhu takes the stones out of Greibel's pack and shows them to Amadi
Gaurav: Unless the pack eats me first, I guess.
The pack is a bat.
Apheori (GM): No, it just smells funny.
(To Greibel): Although now I want it to really be a mimic, and it's just so stoned from all the drugs that it doesn't even do anything...
Gaurav: I may have to leave in around 40 minutes. "May" because the person I'm supposed to be meeting hasn't confirmed the meeting time yet. Grumble, grumble.
Amadi: Yeah... hold onto them, please. This woman's pockets seem to be portals to other planes.
Apheori (GM): >.<
That's the worst.
Radek: Why should I take it back?
Here you are, puppeting about a god's corpse, trying and failing to abuse the power of creation.
You're practically halfway there already!
Rhu takes back stones, puts them into the appropriate packs and returns Greibel's pack to him.
Rhu: But what are they? What do they mean?
Amadi: (to Radek) Oh, that's a good point.
She's a god, she should have power of her own.
And she should know more than I do about this stuff...
So if I can just use that...
Rhu: If we are in another universe, and if this *is* the same Cerris that we landed on after Sarathi ... then have we been in another universe since Sarathi?
Bear Soup Guy: Incidentally, the three stones Greibel has are the Mask, Dragon, and "contagion symbol"
Gaurav: We need some sort of "How To Control A Possessed God" manual.
Amadi: No, you left Arikdirin Vak via Sarathi, came here, then just took a rather squiggly path through space and time.
Amadi sets the box down, sits down as well, and gives the entire thing a big long think.
Rhu: Huh.
Dawn sits down too, opposite Amadi, and also stares at it.
The Gravedigger: Hmmm.
Dawn: It's simple. Do it like normal, but be her instead of you.
Amadi: She's a god.
Radek: You could attempt being insane.
Dawn: Gods can do things properly too, you know. They just don't most of the time.
Amadi: Insane?
Dawn: Like spiders.
Dawn does various finger motions to imitate spiders.
Radek points a thumb towards Dawn.
Radek: ...Like /her/.
Dawn: Exactly like me.
Pretend you're me!
Amadi: Or I could...
Dawn falls over.
Ganelon: I... don't even know if I want to suggest this out of character, but something tells me that Greibel's packing something that could help.
Apheori (GM): YES.
Ganelon: When it comes to making people not think properly.
Apheori (GM): Dawn's already there, at least.
Dawn stares blankly at the ceiling and says, "Wuaaaaaagh."
Amadi: Er... are you okay?
That... wasn't supposed to happen.
Dawn: Such ceiling... Much universe...
Apheori (GM): She's totally out of it.
Rhu: (to Greibel) Did you find a way out that doesn't involve climbing all the way back up the secret door? I don't like this cave with its ghostly outlines and shadows, and we could have this conversation outside.
Bear Soup Guy: DM, did I see anything?
Apheori (GM): Oh, uh... yeah. You can follow the river out fairly easily.
Greibel: The voices in my head say we can follow the river out!
Dawn: Wow...
Gaurav: Could someone please suggest the drugs idea to Haerevan IC? Rhu is far too stupid to come up with it, alas.
Ganelon: I have the same problem.
Well, in that my character would never suggest that in a million years.
For different reasons.
Dawn: Many drugs...
Gaurav: Heh. Greibel might be our only hope, then.
Apheori (GM): That's the best Dawn can do.
Rhu: I think we should go outside. Unless there's more science to be done with the funky water?
Apheori (GM): I think the guy in Amadi is just glad you're not attacking her after she apparently knocked out Dave.
Well, Dawn.
Radek: Did you ever check the status of the thing?
The pool/hole.
Ganelon: He did not!
Apheori (GM): Probably should.
Radek: Give a moment to find out, Rhu.
Ganelon: The most immediate question is, is the hole gone?
Apheori (GM): It seems to be. Roll arcana to verify.
Gaurav: DM: you mentioned a couple of times in the last few sessions that there's a specific reason we've been brought to this cave. Have we sorted that out? It wouldn't do to leave that unsorted.
Apheori (GM): Mostly.
It isn't ruled out at this stage.
Gaurav: Cool.
Radek:
rolling 1d20+12 Arcana
(
11
)
+12
=
23
Apheori (GM): You think it's gone, but you're not entirely sure. The water is a bit weird too, but it doesn't sssseem to be related.
Frezak (GM): We could chuck shit at it.
Gaurav: "bit weird" is a major step down from where it started.
Ganelon: Hrm.
Well, I'm going to take a water sample. If I remember right, the last time we had a hole and water interacting, the water actually went back to normal when it was separated.
...Radek has more samples of weird shit than my gnoll fighter has trophies of all the things he's killed.
Apheori (GM): Eeexcellent.
Radek: Everything looks solid.
Everyone want to head out?
Rhu: (to Amadi) Greibel has drugs. Would drugs help? They helped me find the way to the City of the Dead.
Radek: Amazingly, we seem to have done it.
The hole is closed.
The Gravedigger: Really?
Rhu: Seriously?
The Gravedigger: But all we did was hit shadows?
Really hard.
Radek: If I had to guess, I would say they were... excess material.
The problem was solved when they were created.
Amadi: They would have been created when it was closed.
Radek: They just happened to be, well, a different problem.
Amadi: Related, though.
The Gravedigger: So.... how did it close, then?
Radek: My device worked, of course.
The Gravedigger: Really?
Gosh.
Radek frowns.
Radek: Doubtful, were you?
Rhu: And ... do we really want to close them any more? If we really are in another universe, they might be our way back to our own universe.
The Gravedigger: Good job, Radek!
The Gravedigger winds up to smack Radek heartily on the back but thinks better of it.
Dawn: Real science...
Amadi: Hold on, I've got this, I've got this!
Radek looks appreciative at being spared a violent congratulations, if not so much at being doubted in the first place.
Amadi does something magicky and the box explodes.
Ganelon: Oh my.
Amadi: Dammit!
Dawn: (still lying on the floor, pointing vaguely at the ceiling) Larks... it's larks.
Rhu: ... outside might actually be a better place for explosions. Less chance of a cave-in.
I wonder if the bats will come back now that the Hole is gone. (to George) I guess at the least you should get fewer zombies.
George: Yeah, looks good.
Now if only I'd get paid for this.
I hope you lot weren't expecting to get paid. I don't even get paid and this is supposed to be my job.
Well, not THIS, obviously, but...
George grumbles.
Rhu: Don't you get a promotion, given that you boss went all ... (does chomping motions)?
Radek scoffs.
Radek: For this? This is hardly work. I /enjoy/ this.
Now, if I could be paid to keep present company... well. It would be a more sensible reason than any I currently possess.
George: That wasn't my boss.
Frezak (GM): Yeah, wasn't he from outside the town?
Apheori (GM): Yeah.
George finally takes off his earmuffs.
George: Oh, hey, I can hear!
Apheori (GM): So what, do you all head out? Does someone pick up Dave and shuffle the possessed possessed zombie out?
Frezak (GM): Can't it walk itself?
Apheori (GM): Well, probably.
Ganelon: I lack the strength to carry anyone.
Apheori (GM): Just tell her to come with or something.
Frezak (GM): Gravy automatically picks the Amadi-thing up out of habit.
Gaurav: I guess we could come back to the cave if we need its hairiness or something.
Amadi: Agh, what?
Frezak (GM): Gravy whistles.
Gaurav: So I guess our new goal is to help Haerevan make the box-thing that will save Amadi somehow?
Ganelon: I'm not sure that's what it will do.
George picks up Dawn and slings her over his shoulder.
Greibel looks around
Greibel rolls the porridge up into a long porridge snake
Greibel slings the porridge over his shoulder
The porridge wiggles.
Apheori (GM): Okay, you all head out. Is this when we should break?
AND THEN WE CAN JUST SAY YOU'RE OUT ON SOME RIVERSIDE NEXT TIME.
Frezak (GM): This is where Greibel turns around to reveal his godhood.
Apheori (GM): Shhh, no spoilers.
Gaurav: I'm sure he could found a religion just based off his ability to turn into animals.
Can he turn into plants?
Bear Soup Guy: That's a good question
Frezak (GM): By definition of the 4E power;.. uh....
ONly ressembles 'natural or fey beasts'
So possibly the closest you could get is a... Myconid hound.
Apheori (GM): Also you all should level up.
Gaurav: yay!
Does levelling up change your max HP without increasing your HP to match until the next time yo sleep?
Ganelon: I think you just... count as if you had a full rest when you level up.
That said, often you don't level up until you rest.
Apheori (GM): Okay, so prepare to level up? >.>
Ganelon: It's probably one of those "varies by DM" things.
Apheori (GM): Amadi spends the entire journey out trying to figure out how to heal you all.
I
Gaurav: I accidentally levelled up ages ago, so I should have a lvl 6 Rhu ready to go.
Apheori (GM): I'll tell you how it goes next time.
Frezak (GM): I really don't need it.
The healing.
Gaurav: When is next time? Next Wednesday, same time as today?
Apheori (GM): Aye.
Gaurav: Cool.
Apheori (GM): Unless anyone can't.
Gaurav: I much prefer the weekend, but Wed and Fri are the only days I don't have to leave two hours ago, so ... it'll do.
only other*
Ganelon: Oh, Radek can do the healing thing.
Easily.
If no-one trusts Amadi-twice-removed to pull it off correctly.
Gaurav: I'd prefer A2r to focus on figuring out the box-cure-thing
I'm going to go try to wake up further before my next meeting. Thanks for a great game, sorry for being so out of it today, and see you all next Wednesday at 1730 UTC!
Bear Soup Guy: I'd like to echo all of those sentiments
Frezak (GM): Wednesday!
Bear Soup Guy: Except having a meeting to go to
Adios!
Gaurav: BSG: you can come to my meeting if you like! We're talking diatoms!
Bear Soup Guy: That does sound fascinating but I think I'll pass for a shower and Hearthstone :P
Gaurav: Awesome. Have fun. Bye everybody!
Bear Soup Guy: Bye!

Session 40

Apheori (GM): Today is 10 december. We may or may not be playing.
If we are, I'll be having at least some of you make some checks to ensure you got safely out of the cave network.
Gaurav: Can we get a bonus because Greibel turned into a flock of bats and scouted out the cave last session?
Apheori (GM): Good morning.
Ganelon: Yo.
Apheori (GM): You all are following the river out of the caves.
Frezak (GM): I have great navigation skills if those are still required.
Apheori (GM): You and greibel should roll for it, then.
Ganelon: Radek's got Dungeoneering, but by all means, you guys try first.
Frezak (GM): Perception?
Apheori (GM): Also Radek may or may not want to try to arcana-help the not Amadi along the way. She's still trying to cast spells on Gravy's head and it's not working.
Frezak (GM): Nature?
Apheori (GM): Perception, dungeoneering, and nature. One of each from anyone.
Frezak (GM): Wow.
I'm at.. 11 nature and 14 perception (or 24)
Bear Soup Guy: I've got 12, 7 and 14, respectively
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+16
(
6
)
+16
=
22
Rolling Arcana to assault our guest with indecipherable jargon.
Frezak (GM): I'll take Perception, then.
Greibel can take Nature
Gan can have the scraps.
Apheori (GM): She gives you a confused look and sets Gravy's horn on fire.
Ganelon: I feel so appreciated.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+14+10
(
7
)
+14+10
=
31
Perceptions.
Bear Soup Guy: TEAMWORK
Gaurav: Wow.
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20+14 natures
(
18
)
+14
=
32
Radek: ...Really, now.
What are you /trying/ to accomplish?
Apheori (GM): Need a dungeoneering from someone.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+10 Dungeoneering
(
13
)
+10
=
23
Amadi: Magic, I suppose.
Wait, that actually was something, wasn't it?
Amadi starts poking the horn.
The Gravedigger: Would you mind not doing that?
Amadi: Sorry.
Apheori (GM): Radek gets you all out safely, with Greibel assisting and Gravy ensuring nobody falls in a hole.
Frezak (GM): I have excellent hole expertise.
I have seen holes before.
Apheori (GM): Y'all come out along the river into a horribly bright night full of birds chirping.
Gaurav: ...
Apheori (GM): The sky is full of funky glowing stuff.
Frezak (GM): Uh.
As in the sky is glowing or there's... globs of stuff up there?
Apheori (GM): It's like the aurora, but... more.
Apheori (GM) is so descriptive.
The Gravedigger: Is this normal?
Radek: George, what do you make of this?
George: (pushing up his goggles) Is what normal?
Radek gestures towards the sky.
The Gravedigger points at the sky.
George looks up.
Ganelon: Damnit, man.
George: ...yes?
I mean...
Wait, what do you see?
Frezak (GM): I'M A SCIENTIST TOO
The Gravedigger looks at Radek.
Ganelon: Oh, this looks like another chance to jargon at him.
What does /Radek/ see?
By which I mean, understand?
Gaurav: brb
Apheori (GM): I suppose it really does just look like a really massive, complex, colorful swarm of northern lights.
Except to his sciency eyes, he might recognise the colours?
I dunno. How's his atmospheric physics?
Ganelon: I wouldn't exactly consider it a field he went out of his way to study.
Apheori (GM): Roll arcana to discern about it, then.
Radek:
rolling 1d20+16
(
10
)
+16
=
26
Ganelon: I love that 26 is average for me.
Greibel: Typical. A beautiful natural formation of light and color and we're suspicious that it's a wormhole or else some kind of dark magic.
Greibel sighs
The Gravedigger: Or bees.
Could be space bees.
It never is, but it /could/ be.
Bees.
Apheori (GM): It looks like an aurora. Charges interacting with the atmosphere. Nothing all that odd about it stands out.
Radek scoffs.
Radek: "Dark" magic...
Apheori (GM): This is the point where a Squirrel drops out of a tree next to you.
Squirrel: BEES!
Radek: This is nothing more than a scattering of ionized atmospheric constituents and their resulting optical emissions.
Completely harmless.
George: (skeptically) I guess I'll have to take your word for that.
Ganelon: Thanks, Wikipedia. I knew I could count on you to give me an explanation that means absolutely nothing to a normal person.
Apheori (GM): Yay science articles!
Ganelon: Now you said "a squirrel".
But I see the token of an Amadi.
So what does this appear as to us?
Frezak (GM): It's not 'a' squirrel, it's Squirrel.
Apheori (GM): She looks like them.
Her name is Squirrel.
And she is nuts.
Ganelon: Ha. Ha ha.
Apheori (GM): And George gives her Dawn.
They proceed to stare at each other.
Radek: ...Is this another one?
How many are there?
Amadi: thirteen, approximately. With an allowable failure buffer of five.
The flaming fuck were they doing?
Radek: ...
Greibel: Language, young lady
Greibel takes a toke of his bong
Radek: I'm not sure that I am prepared to deal with thirteen.
Greibel: I'm sure they'll reveal themselves slowly for the sake of your sanity.
Frezak (GM): brb
Gaurav: "And George gives her Dawn." -- like, hands her over?
Amadi: You won't need to. That as many have solidified as you have is peculiar, but they're... they're not here for you.
Gaurav: I suppose Rhu is still blind and cannot see the aurora, unless it's hairy?
Amadi: Nevermind that, though. I expect you'd like me out of here, no? Could you lend a hand?
Apheori (GM): Yup.
And yup.
HAIRY.
Actually...
Does he have anything to say about it?
Gaurav: Nope. He hasn't looked at the sky since he got the mask, so he probably thinks the sky is meant to be hairy.
Radek: ...What do you need help with, exactly?
Amadi: Magic! And creation.
Amadi climbs down off Gravy.
Radek: If that is the most accurate explanation you can give, then you may well be here forever.
Gaurav: Is the sky-hair any different from the wall-hair or people-hair?
Amadi: It's a specific object, but my magic seems to be broken. It's like it's a good mould, but the batter is messed up, so If you can do the actual mixing and baking and I'll show you the pan, do you think you could make the bread?
Apheori (GM): It's both really far away and really close.
Radek: Roll jargon or something.
Rhu reaches out to try and touch the sky-hair, then giggles softly.
Rhu: So much hair.
Radek:
rolling 1d20+16Jargon
(
5
)
+16
=
21
Apheori (GM): Yay +16!
Frezak (GM): Gravy will dig a hole just in case.
Apheori (GM): Radek: She wants you to do a ritual with her assisting.
Amadi walks over and grabs Rhu by the head in the meantime.
Amadi: (to Rhu) Do you know any songs?
Gaurav: Here? We should go back to the village first.
Radek sighs and grumbles.
Radek: ...I can do that.
Rhu: Ow! What? Songs?
Amadi: Sing, please.
Rhu looks around at the others in confusion, then start sings a random pop song from his home planet really, really badly. It sounds a bit like "Always Look on the Bright Side of Life".
Gaurav: Should I roll to stay in tune?
Apheori (GM): Naw, just singing is good enough.
She looks satisfied at this and then shoves a hand in your head.
Do you keep singing?
Gaurav: ... in?
Apheori (GM): In.
Greibel: That's an interesting expression of her love of music
Apheori (GM): It doesn't actually hurt, but anyone looking sees a hand just go... in.
Bear Soup Guy: err, that was OOC but I guess it works IC too
Apheori (GM): XD
Gaurav: If it doesn't hurt, Rhu won't react. It'll look to him like the Amadi-muppet is caressing his face except he can't feel it, which is not even the weirdest thing that's happened in the last ten minutes. He'll ignore it.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Gaurav: And keep on singing badly.
Apheori (GM): She yanks something dark and hairy out and suddenly everything is normal again. You can see normally, hear normally, there's colour, etc etc etc. Also you're really hungry.
Radek scowls intensely at Rhu's attempts at singing.
Amadi drops Rhu and goes over to Radek, holding out the dark hairy thing.
Rhu gasps
Amadi: Can you use this as a base?
Ganelon: You tell me, Miss DM.
Apheori (GM): Arcana to figure out what it even is.
Hey, for all I know Radek would say yes even if he doesn't know. XD
Rhu: What the FUCK
I can see! I can see again!
Greibel: LANGUAGE, young man!
Greibel tokes again
Rhu runs up and hugs Greibel
Rhu: It's gone! It's gone and I can see!
Radek:
rolling 1d20+16
(
3
)
+16
=
19
Of course I can.
Greibel coughs out a plume of smoke
Squirrel: (singing) Laaaaaanguage language language! Language!
Ganelon: The rolls keep getting worse!
Greibel: I'm glad to see that my attempt at surrogate parental guidance has resonated with you
Apheori (GM): Radek: You're not entirely sure what it is, but figure you should be able to sort it out once you get to work on it.
Radek stares hard at the black squiggly.
Apheori (GM): I mean, because you've got some idea, not because you're that utterly lost.
Radek stares /very/ hard at the black squiggly.
Rhu is just kind of jumping around exultantly in the background.
Ganelon: http://www.seventh-house.org/extras/Zetman_CrazyFace4.jpg
Approximately this hard.
Apheori (GM): Eeeek.
Gaurav: Damn.
Apheori (GM): It's a good thing it can't run away.
Bear Soup Guy: one eye bulges out of his head like that teacher in Daria
Radek nods after a while.
Radek: ...Let us begin.
Apheori (GM): Functionally I guess this is just like make whole.
Except weirder.
Ganelon: Creating stuff is most of what Artificers do.
Apheori (GM): Aye, that helps.
Ganelon: Weird how there's no ritual for actually making mundane objects, though. Just making them magical.
Apheori (GM): Amadi gives you the squiggly and I need two arcana rolls.
Radek: 26
22
Ganelon: If this is traditional assisting, he gets a +2 to those from being helped.
Apheori (GM): Yeah, it works and nothing particularly weird happens. After much not so particular weirdness, a fair bit of black stuff floating around, and a weird feeling of up to three different entities in his mind, you have... a box.
And a letter.
Rhu attempts to climb the closest tree, making whooping noises interspersed with random praises to Hazz'ridan
Frezak (GM): If you want to create mundane objects you take the Martial Practice for it.
Mundane means for mundane things.
Or be a Shaper Discipline Psion.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: Roll athletics to climb.
Amadi: Whoohoo!
You're good.
Radek grumbles.
Gaurav: Can I use acrobatics instead to somersault up the tree?
Apheori (GM): No.
Rhu:
rolling d20+3 athletics to climb tree
(
11
)
+3
=
14
Frezak (GM): I could just /put/ you into a tree.
Apheori (GM): Rhu fails to climb the tree.
Bear Soup Guy: I picture Rhu falling backwards, landing hard on the ground, and just grinning widely before standing up to run around yelling again
Gaurav: ^
That. That happens.
Apheori (GM): Yes.
It all fits.
Radek picks up the box and letter, but does not open the former.
Apheori (GM): Meanwhile Squirrel pokes Dave a few times, giggles, and then runs up a tree. Literally running sideways up the tree.
Dave rubs her head.
Gaurav: No stone with a symbol on it?
Apheori (GM): Just a box, maybe 25x15x10cm.
And a letter.
Rhu runs back to the rest of the group.
Ganelon: Tell me what the letter says. He'll read it.
Apheori (GM): It's this. http://wiki.zaori.org/compendium/Letter_84
Rhu: Wow. Okay. WOW. This. This is pretty amazing.
(to Amadi) Thank you. Thankyouthankyouthankyouthankyou.
Amadi: Oh, uh... you're welcome.
Gaurav: Rhu will attempt to hug Amadi if she doesn't look scared of his overenthusiasm at this point. Otherwise: an aborted hug and a handshake.
Radek: ...Hrm.
Apheori (GM): The latter, then. She'd try to pull away.
Frezak (GM): Gravy looms over Radek to read the letter.
Unless Radek tries to hide it from Gravy's eyes.
Bear Soup Guy: THE CODEX OF DOOM
Ganelon: Nah.
Bear Soup Guy: A book the size of a house that sits in the middle of a courtyard somewhere exuding an aroma of sulfur
Ganelon: Radek, being a fast reader, very likely finishes it before Gravy and hands it over to him.
So he can open the box.
Rhu: Oh. Sorry.
Rhu tries to get a grip on himself.
Apheori (GM): The box contains a circular contraption with spaces for seven stones, three more of the stones themselves, and a few chunks of something that looks like it shattered.
Bear Soup Guy: "You may not remember me" - Accurate statement
Frezak (GM): What material was the shattered thing?
Stone?
Apheori (GM): It actually seems more like some sort of plastic.
Gaurav: BSG: it might be a reference to that person who handed you the first stone in the marketplace in Coffle?
Frezak (GM): Yeah, the teleporting lady.
Put your rocks in the thing.
Gaurav: She's in the session logs as "Mysterious Woman": http://wiki.zaori.org/wiki/Holes/Session_9
Bear Soup Guy: Ah, got it. I did remember her but I didn't pin her for the letter writer for some reason.
But I've forgotten all the names of all the towns and planets we've been to, so there's that
I swear it's for my character!
Radek: Where are those stones all of you were carrying around?
Rhu hands the two stones he's carrying to Radek
Greibel gets out his stones and hands them over
Apheori (GM): You wind up with, altogether, a pile of the following: bird, tree, mask, dragon, contagion, cat, dream, and fire.
There also seem to be symbols around the sockets in the contraption, but they've mostly worn off.
Ganelon: I'll do my best to place the stones we've got into their correct sockets, then.
If the symbols are worn off...
Well, Gravy's got good eyes.
We've more stones than slots though, don't we?
Apheori (GM): 8 stones, 7 slots.
Gaurav: Maybe different combinations do different things to the mechanism? Haerevan might know more about this, given that it was his idea.
We still need to exorcise Amadi at some point.
Bear Soup Guy: Maybe it has an Exorcise Amadi setting
Ganelon: Okay, I suppose I ought to ask instead.
Do any symbols on the device seem to correspond to symbols on these stones?
Apheori (GM): You can't tell.
Ganelon: Hmm.
Apheori (GM): Get Gravy to look at it.
Or not.
You look closely and it's like the symbols were never entirely even placed.
Frezak (GM): I want to feel the stones.
Feel where they want to be.
Feel where they should be.
Feel the empty spaces, and the spaces that are empty, and what they need.
I WANT TO FILL THESE HOLES PROPERLY
Apheori (GM): Roll madness or arcana.
Or both.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20 Madness
(
9
)
=
9
rolling 1D20+4 Arcana
(
8
)
+4
=
12
Gaurav: I have a nasty suspicion that Rhu's hairy-vision might have helped here.
Apheori (GM): You wind up with stones placed seemingly at random, with the cat left over.
Ganelon: Does anything happen?
Apheori (GM): Nope.
Rhu: (to Amadi) What is that thing?
Amadi: Some sort of... thing.
They used it to detect and transport oddities.
Back when they had all the pieces. Before the universe tried to write it all out of existence.
Also, I should probably let you have your friend back.
And get back.
To waiting.
Radek: Does this device have multiple configurations?
Rhu: Waiting?
Radek: The letter describes it as a puzzle.
Amadi: For the bread.
(to Radek) It seems to be missing the top, which might be important.
Basically they'd first have folks turn it on - that was the test. Then it would be reordered to change the function - the puzzle, to counter the puzzle of the...
Amadi just stops, not sure what she was saying.
Radek: ...Yes?
Amadi: I don't know. It's not there.
Radek: Hrmph.
Perhaps I can fix it.
Ganelon: The device, he means. Not Amadi.
Rhu: We could try putting it in the order in which we encountered those things. Cat-Tree-Contagion-Dream-Fire-Dragon-Mask. Not sure about the bird.
Amadi nods, waves slightly, says, "Goodbye," convulses a bit, and then falls over.
Rhu checks Amadi's vital signs
Rhu:
rolling d20+15 heal check on Amadi
(
4
)
+15
=
19
Apheori (GM): She's alive, just unconscious.
Gaurav: Any sign of zombie!Amadi re-emerging? How would we know?
Apheori (GM): Radek could probably arcana it.
Or you could try to guess with a madness roll.
Ganelon: I want to see that first.
Gaurav: Let's keep focussing on the box then. Or we can take it back to the village along with George and get some rest before poking at it further.
Ganelon: We solved the zombie problem, I suppose.
Gaurav: We did! I hope George is happy. If anybody who aspires to mini-Radek-ness can ever be happy.
Ganelon: Radek is capable of being happy, in his own way.
You may recall that he had a brief fit of generosity following a certain revelation.
And now Gravy's shovel is magic.
Gaurav: True.
Apheori (GM): So everyone's ready to just head back?
Ganelon: Yeah, Radek will try to Make Whole on the broken thing in the box - and the contraption itself - but it can wait until they're somewhere more comfortable.
Frezak (GM): I also have magic boots.
Ganelon: Right, those too.
Gaurav: I like the idea of going back, unless someone wants to spend the night under the aurora?
Apheori (GM): Great, next time you'll be in town with stuff and things.
Frezak (GM): I'm cool with not sleeping below eldritch skies.
Apheori (GM): Sorry this was so short, and sorry about flipping out at someone not showing up.
Again.
Ganelon: Understandable.
Bear Soup Guy: It was a very mild flip-out
Regardless, this was a fun session
Gaurav: Yes! We got a cool letter and a magic box to play with.
Bear Soup Guy: I'm going to go have a shower before the paint starts peeling from the walls
Bye everyone! See you next time!
Gaurav: bye, BSG!
Apheori (GM): For the log: 16 december
And that
s
all.
I love you guys, even if this is insanely early.

Session 41

Apheori (GM): Is everyone here? I can't even tell.
Gaurav: I see everybody except Frezak and Ellemerr.
Bear Soup Guy: Same but I don't see Gan
Err
Apheori (GM): I only see Gan and Rob.
Bear Soup Guy: Gan's there, I don't see Gaur
But Gaur is clearly there
Apheori (GM): And Frezak?
Ganelon: i
I am here.
Gaurav: Did anybody have a proper chat with Squirrel last week?
Ganelon: Is such a thing even possible?
I didn't /attempt/ to have one.
Apheori (GM): I don't think anyone tried.
Did she do anything?
Gaurav: She climbed up a tree sideways.
And repeated what Greibel said once.
Apheori (GM): I guess y'all just left her there.
And... what, headed back to town?
Gaurav: I think we were still trying to solve the puzzle at the end of the last game. The stone-machine thing.
Ganelon: We resolved to tinker with the puzzle in the middle of a large population center.
Where the explosion would surely cause the most damage.
Apheori (GM): For maximum damage.
Bah.
Ganelon: Hee hee.
Apheori (GM): ELLEMERR!
Ganelon: By all means, though you're welcome to mess with it while we're on the road.
Ellemerr: I'm.. semi-present.
Apheori (GM): Excellent.
You're... unconscious.
I think.
Ellemerr: I'm wrapping gifts and whatnot with a computer on the side.
Apheori (GM): Ghah, I need to do that.
Wrap all my pranks...
Sherandris would be proud.
Ellemerr: Heh...
Apheori (GM): Okay, y'all head back to town, Gravy's probably carrying Amadi, Dave is actually walking, though you may need to point her in the right direction, and George buggers off to somewhere else at some point.
Where do y'all go?
Ganelon: In town? I don't know where there even is to go, other than the barracks we illegally occupied and the inn.
Which we legally but annoyingly occupied.
Gaurav: Rhu needs to sleep and recharge his dailies. Although given his unblindness, he might also just want to go to the pub and sing terrible songs loudly for hours.
Frezak (GM): I thought that double-posessed Amadi wanted to walk by himself.
What do we need to continue Hole research?
Apheori (GM): The double possession was somehow resolved.
I think.
You may want to make sure of that somehow.
The guy said 'bye' and Amadi fell over.
Ganelon: Did someone say "arcana"?
Frezak (GM): Nope, we're good Radek.
No need for your heathen learnings here.
Apheori (GM): Oh, Radek: Around when you all actually move out, a large cephalopod drops on your head.
Because I forgot to give you any loot.
Gaurav: How late is it? Is that massive aurora still around?
Apheori (GM): HERE'S YOUR REPLACEMENT LOOT.
A MAGIC SQUID.
Ganelon: Is it GIBBERING?
Apheori (GM): YES.
Frezak (GM): oh wow.
That's a great item.
Apheori (GM): GIBBERING AND FONDLING SQUID.
Now tell me what it is?
Frezak (GM): There's the... Gibbering Lump.
Ganelon: Well, I was sort-of making a joke
But the Gibbering Lump is- yeah.
It's an actual magical head-slot item. Level 20.
Frezak (GM): "This tiny hunk of mottled flesh warps constantly, growing and losing eyes and mouths as it sits atop your head."
Apheori (GM): Adorable.
What does it do?
Functionally?
Ganelon: +1 to will and it retaliates violently when things make will attacks against you.
Frezak (GM): +1 to will, the first time your will is hit you deal... 2D12 psychic or something.
Ganelon: The first thing to do that takes 2d12 psychic, no roll to avoid it.
Apheori (GM): Eh, sure, why not. Unless it's a bad thing for a pile of level 6s to have a level 20 item?
Frezak (GM): Eh, not when it's a head slot item.
Bear Soup Guy: OP
Apheori (GM): Because that is totally the sort of thing squirrel would drop on your head.
Ganelon: Well, if it were one of the three that gave a +N bonus?
Yes. It would be.
But that's weapons, armor, and neck slots.
Other high level stuff isn't so bad.
Apheori (GM): Okay, so you've got a head thing. GIBBERING HEAD SQUID.
Ganelon: Adding those exact words to my inventory
Apheori (GM): Okay. So you all go back and... what?
Radek looks up and sighs.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: Lights in the sky are still on.
And you see them.
Radek: Someone tell me I'm not expected to feed this thing.
Gaurav: What do will-defending squid even eat? Maybe it just soaks up residual will from the environment.
Rhu has calmed down a bit and looks up at the aurora as we head back into town, occasionally tripping over as he goes.
The Gravedigger: Don't look at me.
I'm not cephalopod expert.
Dawn: Brains.
Rhu: Pretty.
The Gravedigger: I'm just a negative space engineer.
Ganelon: If it's eating my brains, I'd really appreciate knowing.
For future reference.
Apheori (GM): I think you'd probably feel it if it were doing harm. Doesn't seem to be.
Yet.
Gaurav: It'd be fine, Radek has brains to spare. Only one of us who has.
Apheori (GM): He does use those, you know.
Ganelon: They are /not/ to spare.
The Gravedigger marks the Gibbering Squid.
The Gravedigger: I'm watching you.
Ganelon: They're the only thing he has left!
Frezak (GM): Oh, come on.
You have a gun, too.
You're more than brains.
You're also facial hair.
Gaurav: And a safari hat!
Ganelon: It's a gun powered by intelligence!
He doesn't even have the dexterity to make ranged basic attacks!
The porridge jumps onto Greibel's head and mimics the shape and motion of the gibbering squid.
Greibel chuckles jovially
Apheori (GM): He even gibbers a bit.
Radek: How good to know that I've finally attracted imitators.
(From Amadi): Can I do crazy random stuff? Like having Amadi talk through the squid?
(To Amadi): YES.
Amadi 's voice drifts out of the head-squid:
Amadi: Who watches the watchers of the watchers....
Apheori (GM): Wait, what?
Oh, yeah.
The Gravedigger: Sandwich kid!
How're the demon hordes?
The Gravedigger squints into Amadi's eyes.
The Gravedigger: HELLO DEMONS
Ganelon: Is she... conscious?
The Gravedigger: YOU STILL IN HERE?
Apheori (GM): She doesn't seem to be.
Gravedigger: Roll constitution.
Frezak (GM): Huh.
rolling 1D20+4
(
13
)
+4
=
17
If it's Endurance I get another 5.
Apheori (GM): You get a sense of something leaving, but Amadi doesn't actually wake up as yet.
Would endurance be applied to yelling?
Well, being loud.
Frezak (GM): eh... Probably not.
The Gravedigger shrugs and shoulders Amadi.
The Gravedigger: Where are we going now?
Amadi: Save... the mystery...
Frezak (GM): Like a sack of potates.
Or a sack of midgets.
(To Amadi): You may of course wake up whenever in practice.
Ellemerr: ((still thrugh mr. octo))
Oh no, this is all good. :P
Apheori (GM) grins like a maniac.
Dawn: Solve the princess.
Radek: Well...
Gaurav: Did Squirrel follow us, or did we leave her up the tree?
Apheori (GM): Left her up a tree, unless you actually want to try to retrieve her.
George buggers off to go home or whatever regardless of what you lot are doing.
Radek: Having discovered a means of repairing the fabric of the universe, perhaps a few more field trials are in order.
Of course, the damage may also be our only means of... travel, as it were.
The Gravedigger: Anyone have any idea how to look for Holes?
Short of.. asking around, I suppose.
Gaurav: We could travel to the town we were in earlier, which had two Holes open up while we were there. Maybe that part of the planet is particularly volatile, even if the town itself isn't around at this point in time.
I wonder if we could use the Holes to communicate with ... whatever is on the other side.
Oh, we could also go back to Midnight and have another go at the Darkness Beast thing.
Radek: I could spend my time attempting to repair and understand this device in the hopes that it contains a greater solution to the problem, as well, but...
If it happens to be missing pieces, I make no guarantees.
Gaurav: We could investigate the thing Rhu fell into in the pub, if it's still there.
Although that's not very Hole-like.
The Gravedigger: The device seems more magical than technological.
Maybe an arcanist would be able to tel us more about it.
Frezak (GM): What place had Holes opening up as we were there? O.o
Apheori (GM): Rhu fell through a counter.
Not necessarily a hole per-say, but possibly related as another form of manifestation.
Frezak (GM): I thought that was just him phasing out of our reality.
Apheori (GM): You should investigate if his head is particularly big, and if so, what might be wrong with it.
It was.
Frezak (GM): We could just head to next biggest place and ask about both any Holes and the device.
ehhh
Gaurav: Reality should be solider than that.
Frezak (GM): Not in these parts, Rave.
Gaurav: We could be itinerant Hole repairers!
Frezak (GM): HOLEBREAKERS
THE SERIES
Bear Soup Guy: Is this the same town with the library that has the huge book?
Frezak (GM): No, BSG
Radek: Hrmph. I wouldn't get my hopes up. Optimistically, a competent wizard would be a /rare/ find.
Bear Soup Guy: Maybe the book knows about the device
Frezak (GM): That was a huge portaltown.
Bear Soup Guy: Awwww
Frezak (GM): We're in some backwater shithole.
I think >.>
Ganelon: With zombies. Formerly.
The Gravedigger: Couldn't hurt.
Gaurav: Didn't someone have a Book of Answers or something? Maybe Amadi?
Frezak (GM): I'm sure Amadi is full of answers.
however she's also batshit loco.
Ellemerr: So full of it :3
Gaurav: It was "The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Planes"
We could try to make our way back to Arah and have another look at the Book.
Apheori (GM): There was a book that I completely forgot about.
And if Amadi had it, there's no telling where it might have wound up. O_o
Ellemerr: Pocketses.
Dawn: (mumbling) We've lost our muchness. Locked it away.
Frezak (GM): Eaten by hobbits.
Gaurav: Does Rhu still have the skull of Elia on him?
Apheori (GM): Unless he dropped it or something.
Gaurav: I'm kinda surprised that he hasn't, but he didn't drop the stones either, so maybe he's better at not leaving things behind than I am?
Ellemerr: He's probably like me; stuffing things in his pockets and forgetting all about them and finding them again half a year later.
Ganelon: Oh, great.
Looks like I'm being dragged away, folks.
This is... something I can't ignore. Might be quite a while.
Don't stop on my account unless it's totally unavoidable, please.
Hell, let the squid take the wheel while I'm gone or something.
Apheori (GM): Aiight, I'm just going to say you all go back to Dorgin and rest.
Radek does artificer things as usual, who knows what they are.
You all wind up... either at the inn or the guardhouse.
Bear Soup Guy: Adios Gan, good luck with your thing!
Apheori (GM): And yeah, have... fun.
Gaurav: Take care, Gan!
I vote for the guardhouse. Fewer flaws in reality there (that we know about)
Frezak (GM): Yeah, we've been there safely in the past.
Gaurav: So: we sleep? Do we need a guard?
Apheori (GM): Seems safe.
Frezak (GM): SHouldn't need a guard.
We can just bolt the door from the inside.
brb
Gaurav: Let's do that, then. Plus, Radek will be awake anyway.
Frezak (GM): Doing science.
Rhu falls immediately asleep and dreams of auroras.
Apheori (GM): Yay.
Or something.
So what do you all want to do?
Nevermind if it's practical or has any reason to it; I can come up with a reason.
Just what do you want to do?
Gaurav: I like these travel plans people came up with: look around for more Holes, try to get back to Arah.
Bear Soup Guy: Is Arah where the big book was?
Apheori (GM): Aye
.
Bear Soup Guy: Another vote for Arah then
I have a good feeling about that big book
Frezak (GM): Though since we don't know how to get to Arah, might as well be travelling scholars for a bit.
Gaurav: Maybe that portal we went through to get to Arah is still on this planet somewhere. Or we could take the long way around and go via Amadi's realm, as Gravy did when he fixed the Hole in Coffle
Frezak (GM): I dunno, the godlings impressed upon me that doing that sort of thing wasn't an ideally repeatable experience.
Gaurav: Let's go to the pub and start asking questions once we're done resting.
Oh hey! The first Hole we found on this planet might still be around somewhere. Near that commune village and under the big tree.
Apheori (GM): That was in Deslan. Did I ever even mention the region you're in now?
Gaurav: I don't think so, but I might have missed it.
Frezak (GM): TREES
Apheori (GM): Okay, I need to go get really drunk.
Gaurav: Is it morning yet? I'd like to go ask questions.
Apheori (GM): Yeah, sure.
Radek's busy doing something really important right now so just feel free to leave him behind.
Gaurav: Frezak? BSG? You guys still around?
Frezak (GM): Yup.
Bear Soup Guy: Sure am
Gaurav: Okay, let's go ask questions then.
Frezak (GM): Because we're all so good at that.
Rhu wanders down to the pub and looks around for anyone with time to spare.
Gaurav: (He is careful to avoid going anywhere near the side of the bar he fell into earlier)
Apheori (GM): There's two guys arguing over what appears to be a baby dragon sitting on the table.
There's a barkeep.
There's a creepy old lady.
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20+14 nature on the baby dragon
(
17
)
+14
=
31
Gaurav: Not the same creepy old lady from earlier? But similar?
Rhu wanders over to the barkeep and buys a drink. He asks the barkeep about the zombies.
Apheori (GM): The barkeep says they've been coming about for awhile, and just getting worse.
Rhu: Is it just this region -- what is this region called, by the way -- or is the whole planet that's seen zombie outbreaks?
Apheori (GM): He says they've been all over. Just don't get bit or do anything stupid with them if you see them.
This is South Haven.
If that contradicts anything I said earlier, I forgot. >.>
Gaurav: Does anybody remember how we worked out that this planet was the same one Coffle was one? Or have we worked that out yet?
Apheori (GM): Haerevan said so, I think.
Unless he didn't.
Radek could do a spectral analysis of the atmosphere.
Gaurav: Oh right, yes. Haerevan told us that this was Cerris.
Frezak (GM): Does it smell like the same plane?
Rhu: (to barkeep) Do you know of a city called Coffle? My friends and I visited there many years ago, and we were told that this planet is Cerris, so it might be here somewhere. In Deslan, I think.
Gaurav: Dunno, all I can smell is Greibel's mixtures.
Greibel exudes fumes
Gaurav: DM: Did Greibel's nature check have any effect on the baby dragon?
Bear Soup Guy: ^
Apheori (GM): The barkeep says Deslan's way out there. Other side of the planet.
Holy crap, I completely missed that.
Greibel: Sorry, it's a healthy baby dragon, very happy, quite content, and it doesn't really give a damn about anything.
And this is a completely different creepy old lady.
Bear Soup Guy: Baby badass dragon
Rhu: (to barkeep) I suppose traveling to Deslan is out of the question then?
Apheori (GM): He says there's boats that go that way.
Rhu: What about ... spaceboats? That travel through the sky?
Bear Soup Guy: No RPG scenario is complete without a long boat ride/boat combat
I won't stand for anything less
Apheori (GM): He says, no, shipping ships. On the ocean.
Frezak (GM): Were-goose pirates.
Gaurav: Boat combat is the best combat. If I ever run a D&D game, I'm going to have tons of that.
Rhu: Are they safe? Where would we find a ship heading to Deslan?
Apheori (GM): Can take an airship to Ros. There's a port there.
Rhu: *Airship*! Now we're talking. Where can we catch an airship from?
Bear Soup Guy: Even better!
Gaurav: BSG: How far do you reckon Greibel can fly as a flock of birds?
Amadi 's voice muses, longingly, through the form of the octopus:
Amadi: Feel the sea breeze... Smell the salty air... Ain't nobody home.
Bear Soup Guy: Gaurav: I don't reckon a thing about D&D mechanics! =P
Apheori (GM): Rhu: The guy tells you they have a dock in town, if it ever comes by. Should have been through almost a week ago.
Gaurav: Quest added: investigate missing/late airship.
Frezak (GM): That's a tough order, though.
Trudging through the wilderness in a straight line looking for a maybe-crashed ship.
Bear Soup Guy: Birds Greibel could fly really high up to at least see if it's crashed anywhere nearby
Gaurav: ^
Bear Soup Guy: Birds Greibel absolutely does so
And probably rolls perception
Apheori (GM): Ho far can birds go/spread?
Gaurav: I mean, I'm 50% sure we're going to go to the aerodrome place and find that such delays are perfectly normal, but you never know.
Apheori (GM): Screw it just roll.
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20+12
(
16
)
+12
=
28
The birds form a circle in the air with their eyes pointed outward from the circle
Rhu: (to barkeep, softly) Who's the old lady?
Apheori (GM): You take a couple of hours to look and find lots of interesting things.
I'll tell you all about it when everyone else catches up. Don't let me forget.
Bear Soup Guy: Sexy
Apheori (GM): She's Talia Sauris and she's very cranky.
Rhu: Why?
Apheori (GM): He doesn't seem to know.
...or care.
Rhu: Hmm.
Gaurav: Okay, before we do anything else, we should take squid!Amadi to the seashore.
Ellemerr: Remember that you're unlikely to get it off Rarek's head.
Gaurav: Oh. I was expecting it to happily run into the sea and swim away or something.
Ellemerr: It's a pretty good head slot item, so while Radek would probably be happy, it's not advisable to get rid of it.
Gaurav: Hmm.
Frezak (GM): (thought we're unlikely to ever need the mechanics of the thing.)
Apheori (GM): Throwing it away would be silly. If nothing else it'd be worth a fair bit of gold or magic dust.
And in the meantime it's hilarious.
Does Rhu do anything else?
Does Gravy do anything?
Radek's still at the guardhouse working on his... large thing.
Rhu makes conversation with the barkeep about life in Dorgin and in the South Havens, trying to learn what he can.
Apheori (GM): Roll streetwise or whatever.
Or just give me a straight up charisma check, but I expect your streetwise will be higher. >.>
Gaurav: I think it's the same? +2 for both, but that's only because of half levels.
Rhu:
rolling d20+2 streetwise to glean knowledge from barkeep whose name I don't know yet
(
16
)
+2
=
18
Ellemerr: Skill checks are always higher than (or the same as) attribute checks. Since skill checks includes the attribute.
Frezak (GM): Gravy does nothing worth mentioning.
Apheori (GM): Oh, I see how it is.
Rhu: Life is life, it's a lot of logging in the area, further out there's a lot of farming, folks are miserable enough, business is good, there are some weird tree creatures that keep beating up one of the farms, but only ever that specific farm, and something about the mayor and his wife having a massive fall-out.
Rhu: Which farm?
Apheori (GM): You don't care which. You can just go to 'that farm' if you want to. >.>
Or rather he probably says and *I* don't even care about the details.
Gaurav: Okay, I have to ask what the falling-out was about, but that's just because I'm a huge gossip.
Bear Soup Guy: The druids are probably not enthusiastic about fighting an ent
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You see a bunch of stuff. There's a fascinating canyon with some very nice geology over one way, a giant tree that completely dwarfs all the others, a mountain range with the sea apparently on the other side off the in distance, and nearer by you find a wizard's tower that appears to be completely abandoned, there's a mine that looks to be infested with trolls somewhere else, there's a bunch of tree creatures bashing down a barn over here with cows running every which way, and oh, yeah, you do find a crashed dirigible in some woods.
Gaurav: You don't have to fight it! You can talk to it. Gravy could turn into a tree again and talk to it mano a mano.
Frezak (GM): You mean branch to branch.
Leaf to leaf.
Root TO FACE
Gaurav: Trunk to trunk
Apheori (GM): Rhu: He gives you like five different theories about what the falling out was about, none of which make any sense. One involves a set of frying pans, another a fire that never happened, another a policy involving cats.
Gaurav: ROOT TO FACE
Rhu nods sadly.
Greibel touches down to the ground to report on his findings
Apheori (GM): So y'all have options here, some of which are completely irrelevant but might be interesting to check out, and others which will take you in a more relevant direction.
Frezak (GM): The trees might be an occurence similar to the zombles?
Apheori (GM): Greibel didn't go up and nature them, so it's hard to say at this point.
Gaurav: I vote for the giant tree. It might be nothing and might be eliminated quickly, but the last time we dealt with a giant tree there was a Hole that threw out will attacks underneath it.
Was the giant tree anywhere near the farm with the tree things?
Frezak (GM): We might as well check out the treants on the way to the big tree.
Apheori (GM): On the way.
I NEED FOOD.
I'LL BE BACK IN A BIT.
Gaurav: We should report the dirigible to someone so they know what happened to it and where.
Frezak (GM): I don't think these people really care.
Or at least can do anything about it.
We'd need to find the dirigble company.
The dirigibalists
Gaurav: Also known as Those Magnificent Men in their Flying Machines
Eh, Rhu will swing by the airship port on our way to the farm and let them know if it comes to that. Although maybe Greibel should do that, in case they have questions about what the site looks like and exactly where it is.
brb
Apheori (GM): Fooood.
Ellemerr: Food is good.
Apheori (GM): YES.
Gaurav: We might want to loot -- I mean, investigate -- the wizard's tower at some point.
Frezak (GM): Yeah, if nothing else, Radek could find shit to break down into drugs.
Dust.
I mean dust.
non-drug dust.
Apheori (GM): Eh, you want to come back next time to find out what the hell Radek's been building all this time? Then you can also head out then and do... exciting things.
Apheori (GM) handwaves.
Gaurav: Up to you! We could continue on for a while, given that Frezak and Ellemerr are up late tonight, and maybe Gan will be able to join us. On the other hand, it would be nice to get out of the house before the sun sets, so there's also that.
Ellemerr: Sun? O_o
(I'm currently above the arctic circle. We're in the Dark.)
Gaurav: Woah! Is it 24 hours of darkness, then? When will the sun re-emerge?
Ellemerr: Er... sometime?
Maybe... february...?
Gaurav: 0.0
wow
Ellemerr: I'm always more interested in when it COMES. Since I really love it.
(And we do have twilight for a couple hours.)
Gaurav: Around noon?
When does it come?
Apheori (GM): We're really south, you're really north. Whoo!
Gaurav: We're not _that_ south. I've been souther.
Apheori (GM): Ghuh, is it still cold out?
Ellemerr: I DON'T KNOW. O_o Because I wasn't here this year, and I've not a good enough memory to remember it from year to year.
Apheori (GM): Pfft, this is pretty south as far as daylight is concerned.
Ellemerr: -12 today.
Anyway, are we playing more? 'Cos if we're not we should stop polluting the log.
Apheori (GM): Agh.
That's cold.
Oh, right.
NEXT TIME.
WHEN IS NEXT TIME?
We'll figure that out on skype.
Bear Soup Guy: ON SKYPE
Apheori (GM): Record logs blah blah blah this was 22 december.

Session 42

Ganelon: I'm going to reiterate for the sake of the log, that since Radek has been building a thing...
We decided it was a robot, big enough to be held in both hands, called the Navigator. Its purpose is to scout Holes ahead of us important living people and plot a course through the space in-between, as well as establish a reliable means of travel for us to use.
Basically, it exists to find destinations we actually want rather than leaving that up to the fickle whims of fate, and then give us a way to reach them.
That's the theory behind it, anyways.
And for posterity, it stalks the earth on steel talons.
Apheori (GM): STEEL TALONS.
Also I think I'm done getting disconnected now.
Gaurav: What does the Navigator look like? I'm imagining a small metal ball with several beady glowing-red eyes on it just covered in talons. Talons, talons everywhere.
Apheori (GM): No, just the talons it walks on. Has some sort of display and probably some other appendages.
I'm a try drawing a map of what Greibel saw.
Where should I put it?
Ganelon: Drawing a map using what?
It likely requires some secondary forms of locomotion in the event that there's no ground to walk on, or gravity.
But they are secondary.
A display is probably there. Glowing red "eyes"? Done.
Apheori (GM): What should I use to draw it?
Ganelon: I don't know. Roll20 has drawing tools, but if you want anything resembling detail, you either make a collage of stolen images on the map layer or you find a proper program to draw in.
The latter may require art skills.
I don't know what you're trying to draw, here.
Apheori (GM): Really bad gimp mouse drawing it is.
>.>
Ganelon: http://i.imgur.com/KOLSY5e.png
If you're looking for this level of quality, I regret to inform you that it took me hours and Roll20's freehand tool is not a forgiving mistress.
...One of my DMs insists I draw foxes on every world/city map ever since another player did a bunny and I doodled a fox looming over it.
Gaurav: That's an awesome fox! Poor bunny.
Ganelon: Here, lemme upload the original one.
Apheori (GM): No, I'm after a much more horrid level of detail.
Ganelon: http://i.imgur.com/bTPrrGq.png
Apheori (GM): The lines are... messed up, even.
Ganelon: Ronald is a reincarnated lich with the body and brain of a bunny.
Apheori (GM): What am I forgetting?
Anyone remember where the river was?
Ganelon: Freya is my character. She's a werefox.
Apheori (GM): That you came out by?
Gaurav: Ooo, pretty!
Apheori (GM): Or where you went in that cave?
Ganelon: "Where"?
Apheori (GM): Did I give any frame of reference?
Oh, whatever.
Oh, dirigible! Forgot that, too.
Ganelon: I'm afraid I wouldn't remember if you did.
Apheori (GM): Sorry about that.
MAP. http://wiki.zaori.org/w/images/4/44/Holes_dorgin_area_map.jpg
Y'all are in Dorgin now.
You can go... places.
Radek has a thingy.
Greibel is present.
Apheori (GM): Wheee.
Gaurav: Pretty!
Ganelon: Someone else is gonna need to take the wheel at the start of this, seeing as how I was unfortunately called away before the end of last session and don't fully remember our situation.
I still have a squid adorning my cranium, though.
Apheori (GM): Greibel did a scouting, the others talked to folks.
But this is mostly Greibel's work. This map.
So at this point I have no idea what y'all want to do.
DISCUSSMENT.
Ganelon: It was very appropriate for Radek to concern himself with solving a long-term but almost certainly unavoidable problem.
Apheori (GM): Frezak said something about dirigiblement.
Gaurav: Last time I voted we start with the Giant Tree, since we interacted with a giant tree earlier in the campaign and almost died and whatnot, but ... hmm. That wizard tower seems suspiciously close to the cave with the holes.
Frezak (GM): Yeah, I wanted to go disintegrate the dirigible.
I think.
Gaurav: And then investigate the Tree on the way back?
Ganelon: Disintegrate?
Like for magic dust?
Gaurav: DM: was there anything special about the canyon to the northeast? Thanks for the map, btw, I love maps.
Apheori (GM): It had some really nice geology.
It seemed nice to Greibel, anyway.
Gaurav: If we want to be heroes, we should try to stop the tree creatures attacking the barn, I suppose. It doesn't look too far away, so we might make it in time to save some cows.
Frezak (GM): That said, given where we are...
We could go check out the wizard tower on the way up.
See if there's anything we can use.
Ganelon: Yeah, that sounds good to me.
Gaurav: Rhu's much too happy being able to see again to really spend too much time thinking of plans, so he'll just follow Gravy and Radek for now.
Frezak (GM): Because we're so sensible.
Gaurav: Because you're there. He'd be perfectly happy to run around in circles looking at everything he can if it came to that.
If we're heading south from the town, should we also investigate this mine-o'-trolls while we're there? Given that they were mining, they might have had ... interactions ... with the Hole in the Ground.
Ganelon: Wait, the trolls are mining? Not just occupying the mine?
Apheori (GM): I'll let Greibel answer that.
BSG: You still awake?
Gaurav: Oh, right, maybe not. I'm imagining them wandering around inside the cave system and possibly discovering something, although I guess that's a bit of a long shot.
Bear Soup Guy shrugs
Frezak (GM): Turns out they discovered a skill for fine metallurgy and are now silversmiths.
Gaurav: So: to the Wizard's Tower?
Bear Soup Guy: I think the real question is
Can we afford to /not/ go to the Wizard's tower?
And the answer to that is most often, "no. No we cannot."
Frezak (GM): THERE COULD BE NEW AND FABULOUS DRUGS
Ganelon: "Is the tower itself magic?"
"Sure."
"I disenchant the entire tower."
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Apheori (GM): Aiight, so y'all go there?
Ganelon: I have no objections!
Rhu brings up the rear singing a happy song.
Apheori (GM): Someone remind me how much XP an encounter should be for a party of your level? >.>
Ganelon: ...Man, I don't know.
Apheori (GM): ...what level even are you?
Ganelon: 4E's standard is basically 10 fights to level up.
6.
Harder or easier fights can skew this number.
But a number of standard enemies equal to the party's size and level is worth one tenth of a level-up.
Amadi joins in Rhu's singing (possibly through strange means, since I can't even remember if she's currently all-the-way alive).
Bear Soup Guy: Have we rested since our last encounter? I can't remember if I should've put my health back up.
Gaurav: A Level 6 encounter for 5 PCs = target encounter of 1,250 XP, so says DMG pg 57.
Apheori (GM): Yeah, you rested and leveled up.
Ganelon: Probably. Radek spent a lot of time working.
Apheori (GM): So everyone update their health and stuff.
Gaurav: Do we get a second Action Point as well, then?
Apheori (GM) shrugs.
Ganelon: Nah, new day means APs are set to 1.
You can't hoard 'em.
Gaurav: Boo.
Apheori (GM): I think Amadi's fine now.
Roll a d20 to find out.
>.>
Amadi:
rolling 1d20
(
14
)
=
14
Apheori (GM): You're fine.
Slight headache. Greibel appears to be on fire. Dave is... remembering things she shouldn't be. But really everything is just dandy.
Also Dave is just sort of following you around for no apparent reason not really saying anything.
It'd be a little creepy, but for whatever reason it isn't.
Gaurav: We're used to Dave doing that, I think.
Ganelon: That really sounds quite normal to me.
For Dave, anyway.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Ghah, why does roll20 use the damn alt key for EVERYTHING?
Radek: So you found a wizard's tower? How did you know it belonged to a wizard?
Greibel: I've played D&D before. I know what a wizard's tower looks like.
Apheori (GM): Can someone put a real circle there? >.<
Greibel: All pointy at the top and made out of stone.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: It also has WIZA D written in big letters over the door.
Greibel: And it also has WIZA D written in big letter over the door.
Radek: ...
Radek shakes his head in disappointment at the very idea of a wizard branding his door so ostentatiously.
Gaurav: How big a circle?
Greibel: The most effective marketing strategy is an accessible one
Apheori (GM): THANK YOU.
Bear Soup Guy: That is a big circle
Apheori (GM): BIG.
It's a big tower.
Radek: ...Knock on the door please, Gravy.
Ganelon: Why him? Because he knocks loudest.
Apheori (GM): So You're all there, it's a big tall pointy tower, a bit run down and crumbly especially higher up, and in big letters is something that might say 'wizard'.
And I suck at drawing doors.
Frezak (GM): I KNOCK ON THE DOOR
Rhu: We don't have to knock. Greibel could fly in through the window or something.
Frezak (GM): Where's Amadi?
Apheori (GM): Gravy's knock booms inside the tower.
Perception?
The Gravedigger: It's polite.
HELLLOOOOOOO
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+14
(
4
)
+14
=
18
blargh
Apheori (GM): You hear something rustling inside, which gets louder after your hello.
Nobody actually responds.
Ellemerr: I don't know. Following you. Humming.
Ganelon: I'm... gonna do an Arcana, if I might. To check for security systems.
Apheori (GM): Do iiit.
Gaurav: This tower is infested by candy wrappers! We should escape while we still can.
Apheori (GM): Twice.
Ganelon: You know, like stuff that makes this a magical bug-zapper for daring thieves.
rolling 1d20+16 Arcana 1
(
7
)
+16
=
23
rolling 1d20+16 Arcana 2
(
6
)
+16
=
22
Frezak (GM): oh wow.
Apheori (GM): Okay, so there IS a magical trap thing, and it appears to be slightly busted.
Frezak (GM): Glad we have an expert.
Apheori (GM): You can disable it, fix it, direct everyone around it, or tell Gravy to walk into it and see if he realises what you're doing.
Ganelon: That last option would tempt me more if Gravy weren't easily the least frustrating and most supportive goon on this squad.
Apheori (GM): What about Rhu?
Frezak (GM): You could just tell Gravy and he' likely do it anyways.
Apheori (GM): It might actually hurt him, but he'd probably be even easier to get to do it.
Ganelon: But Radek says: "Fuck wizards!"
I'll disable it.
Frezak (GM): Having 70 HP makes me feel pretty invincible.
Apheori (GM): Oh, you don't think it would hurt Gravy. Or Greibel, for that matter.
Frezak (GM): Or just give me the orb then have me plough through everything.
Gaurav: ^
Apheori (GM): Roll another arcana.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+16
(
10
)
+16
=
26
This also lets him brag.
Apheori (GM): Damn, I was hoping for a fail. A fail would have been hilarious.
Ganelon: Radek? Fail?
Hah! He even succeeds at rolling like shit on sanity when he wants to!
Apheori (GM): Well, fail to do it properly.
It would have significantly messed up his hair and beard.
Gravy: Perception?
Or should I just use your passive?
Are you listening at the door?
Frezak (GM): He's at the door and listening, but not listening at the door.
He's stood there.
Possibly whistling.
Apheori (GM): Right.
In tune with Amadi?
Frezak (GM): Passive Perception is generally just for stealth.
no.
Not at all.
He has no musical talent whatsoever.
Apheori (GM): Aiight.
Perception?
Frezak (GM): Small sponges have disdain for his musical ability.
Perception!
rolling 1D20+14
(
3
)
+14
=
17
Apheori (GM): Aiight, nothing seems to change inside.
Still rustling.
What do y'all do now?
Frezak (GM): Gravy is waiting for Radek to come up with a plan.
Before he gets bored and just barges in.
In... a friendly way.
Radek: The security should be disabled, now. Shoddy piece of work - I doubt the owner's home.
Rhu: I say we go in. We've announced our presence. We've knocked politely. If there's something in there, it's probably smaller than a dragon.
Radek strokes his beard and grins.
Frezak (GM): Gravy tires the door.
*tries
Apheori (GM): It's either locked or jammed.
Radek: Let's hope the failing defenses have kept whatever's inside undisturbed, hmm?
Frezak (GM): Gravy walks up to Radek.
And turns smartly on his heel.
The Gravedigger: GRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAVES
Frezak (GM): And charges the door.
Apheori (GM): Give me a strength check. >.>
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+4+3
(
19
)
+4+3
=
26
Apheori (GM): Gravy sends the door flying off its hinges, winds up on top of it, and surfs about halfway into the tower atop the door.
The Gravedigger: YEAAAAAAAAHHHHHH
Apheori (GM): So the inside of the tower... there's some odd boxes and stuff, and it looks like a few of the walls are literally crumbling, and a spiral staircase around the wall.
Except for some reason, EVERYTHING is covered in butterflies.
Except where you and the door smashed a bunch of them. That's just smashed butterflies.
The Gravedigger: AMAAAAAAAAADI
Apheori (GM): I'll draw it in a moment.
The Gravedigger: BUGS!
Gaurav: Live butterflies?
Apheori (GM): Flapping.
Gaurav: Huh.
Apheori (GM): Those are stairs and boxes. >.>
Amadi: BUGS!
Frezak (GM): AAAAND dinner.
I'll be back..... eventually.
>.>
Gaurav: Do the stairs go up as well as down?
Amadi flaps her arms like a butterfly.
Apheori (GM): Lunchtime!
Radek leans in to peer through the destroyed entrance.
Radek grumbles.
Radek: ...Bugs.
Apheori (GM): Oh, stairs at this level only seem to go up.
Place your icons. Where all are you?
Gaurav looks around for any signs of tunnels or basements
Ganelon: Leering in like the Grinch.
Rhu:
rolling d20+15 perception check
(
9
)
+15
=
24
Apheori (GM): Rhu: There are too many butterflies. You can't tell.
So much bright and colour...
Ganelon: Specifically,
http://i.imgur.com/Ley4nOH.png
Like this.
Apheori (GM): Adorable.
Gaurav: Gan: heh.
Apheori (GM): Aiight, since Frezak's dunnering, I'ma lunch. Assuming we all come back alive, you can get attacked later.
Rhu tries to wave some butterflies away from him.
Gaurav: Then I shall shower. brb!
Bear Soup Guy: I shall also shower. Brb also!
Gaurav: Back!
Apheori (GM): So there's this attack I really want Dave to use, and just reading the description makes me want to fall over giggling.
Frezak (GM): What's the power?
Apheori (GM): You'll see if she uses it.
It'll be obvious because she'll fall over giggling in the process.
Ganelon: ...So long as she's not attacking /us/...
Apheori (GM): That will depend on how you react.
Gaurav: o.0
Apheori (GM): Is everyone back, or is this another one of Rob's three-hour showers?
Ganelon: Nice rhyme.
Gaurav: I think we can be relied on to react in the worst way possible.
Apheori (GM): Thanks. It was totally unintentional.
And yes, yes you can. >.<
Bear Soup Guy: I'm back!
Mostly
Gaurav: Yay!
Bear Soup Guy: I can't be blamed for my long showers. My hair has a mind of its own and it DEMANDS to be treated at its own pace.
Ganelon: Your hair makes demands of you?
Bah!
Bear Soup Guy: Sometimes I think it watches me
Ganelon: Take a knife to it!
Bear Soup Guy: :O
Frezak (GM): WHAT
Ganelon: I'm saying STAB YOUR HAIR.
Apheori (GM): ALRIGHT.
Well, the shower thing was mostly just a jab at how you leave yourself as RAHB|shower on IRC for hours sometimes. XD
Bear Soup Guy: =D
Apheori (GM): He has good hair! Don't say that.
Bear Soup Guy: I do do that
Apheori (GM): Okay, we're all here, and I've mostly gotten the image of Dawn and Coraline slappy-fighting each other yelling nonsense like BRING IT and JERKFACE and YOU'RE GOING DOWN out of my head...
WIZARD'S TOWER FULL OF BUTTERFLIES.
They're everywhere, rustling.
Rhu was trying to search through them, without much luck.
Greibel or Radek could probably try to see if there's more to them.
Gaurav: Greibel could commune with them.
Apheori (GM): But Radek is being the Grinch right now and doesn't want to head in.
What about Amadi?
Ganelon: Aaw, very well.
He'll skulk inside and inspect the butterflies.
Bear Soup Guy: Greibel will shout at the heavens with his arms outstretched as his figure dramatically turns into butterflies in a Greibel shape that slowly dissipate and float in over Radek's shoulder to mingle with the other butterflies
Mostly to annoy Radek
Apheori (GM): Gan: They look like butterflies. There's clearly something magical about them, but without doing more it's hard to tell what. They certainly don't seem to have much purpose.
Gaurav: 0.0
Apheori (GM): Heeee.
Gaurav: I'm not sure I've ever approved of anything this much in my entire life.
Radek:
rolling 1d20+3 Intimidate
(
9
)
+3
=
12
Radek scowls intensely.
Apheori (GM): If Ellemerr is gone, I'm just going to say Amadi will head in as well and dance in the butterflies and greibel.
With Dave following her around very, very closely.
Is the intimidate directed at anyone in particular?
Ganelon: Only so much as one can scowl at a swarm of butterflies.
Apheori (GM): Alas, it doesn't actually work, unless the butterflies decide on their own to suddenly be polite.
Radek: Someone catch one of these for me.
A closer inspection is warranted.
Apheori (GM): Butterflies are landing on Amadi rather like mad, starting to outright cover her.
Frezak (GM): I GRAB BUTTERFLIES
Apheori (GM): Depending on what you mean by catch, that could qualify.
Frezak (GM): In fact.
I just take Amadi to radek.
Ganelon: Now that's using your noggin.
Frezak (GM): And plonk her down in front of him.
And beam.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: Perception.
Radek strokes his beard again and leans in close to have a look.
Radek:
rolling 1d20+16 Arcana
(
13
)
+16
=
29
Bear Soup Guy: Gravy catching butterflies: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ECAHDrKfxqs#t=14
Apheori (GM): The butterflies appear to have been charmed to live long on magic and swarm the place. It's not the same sort of magic at all as the door's defenses, however, so you think it was probably done by someone else entirely.
Radek: ...What a flamboyant waste of resources these must have been.
Their lifespans have been extended and they've been given a directive to linger here.
Apheori (GM): RHU.
Gaurav: Sorry!
rolling d20+15 perception
(
6
)
+15
=
21
Apheori (GM): You realise you can hear something coming from the box next to you.
Rhu waves others over and points to the box.
Radek raises an eyebrow and gestures Gravy to look behind him.
Frezak (GM): Gravy obeys!
And picks up a golf club.
Apheori (GM): What does he do, go and open it?
Gaurav: I've just gotten a phone call from work, so I'll be a little distracted for the next few minutes.
Frezak (GM): Pretty much.
I /suppose/ he could poke it a bit first.
Or use his GravyVision if you guys think he needs to.
Ellemerr: I'm sorry! I was busy with something and we were having a break and I didn't notice we stopped having a break and you should've poked me on skype, but I might be here now.
Gaurav: It's always time for GravyVision.
Bear Soup Guy: It's okay Merr, I'm butterflies now and we're all inside the tower. That's pretty much all you missed.
Apheori (GM): Ellemerr: Sorry.
You're dancing with butterflies.
Bear Soup Guy: And that
Apheori (GM): Gravy: vision.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+14+10
(
5
)
+14+10
=
29
Apheori (GM): Your rolls suck.
But there seems to be something reasonably Rhu-sized hiding in the box.
Seriously, though, roll better. I want to start having you see around corners.
Frezak (GM): I would love to roll better.
Apheori (GM): Aye. >.<
Open it?
Or smash it? Or something else?
Ganelon: Radek's, uh...
Decently capable of fiddling with locks.
Frezak (GM): I smack it and go HELLOOOOOOO?
Apheori (GM): A stone man bursts out and tries to punch you.
Initiative!
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+3
(
5
)
+3
=
8
Gaurav: 0.0
Ganelon: Just roll with it, man!
Frezak (GM): 23
I WAS BORN FOR THIS
Apheori (GM): This cant be right. O_o
Yeah, I can't do math.
Frezak (GM): Can I help?
Apheori (GM): I mis-added.
It's fine.
Rhu:
rolling d20+6 initiative
(
16
)
+6
=
22
Bear Soup Guy: Oh, initiative, right
Ellemerr:
rolling 1d20 + 3
(
6
)
+3
=
9
Bear Soup Guy: RIGHT!
rolling 1d20+3
(
13
)
+3
=
16
Frezak (GM): by Midriin Dave has 28?
Apheori (GM): The stone thing unfortunately spent all its surprise round breaking out of the box.
I DON'T KNOW HOW.
Can she range at something through other characters' squares?
Ganelon: Yeah.
Enemies grant cover to other enemies, but we don't.
So you can't shoot past a hostile target without a -2 penalty, basically. Shooting past a friendly is fine.
And shooting into a melee in this edition is also fine.
Apheori (GM): She sets it on fire on yells something completely incoherent. It sounds like a tirade about graves.
The Gravedigger: GRAVES?
Frezak (GM): I'll mark the thing first;
Then use Earthgrasp Strike.
rolling 1D20+10
(
19
)
+10
=
29
AC
Oh, cool.
Apheori (GM): Yeah.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D10+5
(
10
)
+5
=
15
ANd it is prone.
It can't stand up on it's next turn.
And when it stands it takes another D10+5
Apheori (GM): Blimey.
Frezak (GM): It's a really cool power.
And that's my turn complete.
Apheori (GM): Rhu!
Frezak (GM): Kiiiiil iiiiiit
Murrrrderrrrr
Gaurav: Can I skip? Still on call.
Skip -> delay. Thing.
Frezak (GM): That's totally a valid action.
Apheori (GM): Sure, whatever.
Butterflies!
Frezak (GM): Butterflies of FIERY DESTRUCTION
Apheori (GM): BSG!
Bear Soup Guy: SORRY I'M BACK
Am I still butterflies?
Apheori (GM): Yes.
But you can stop being. Or you can keep. Or whatever.
Bear Soup Guy: Well I think I will wild shape to stop being
mainly because I don't think I have any other minor actions anyway
And then I will immediately Fire Hawk that thing
rolling 1d20+8 vs reflex
(
3
)
+8
=
11
ouch
Apheori (GM): Yeah, too low.
Anything happen anyway?
Ganelon: Nah, this is a mere at-will.
Bear Soup Guy: Yeah what he said
Then I move there and end turn
Apheori (GM): Oh, the stone thing should have hammered Gravy when he knocked it prone.
Oops.
Well, it gets up.
Frezak (GM): it can't.
Not this turn.
It hit it SO HARD
Apheori (GM): It's not
Eh?
Frezak (GM): It can't get up this turn.
Apheori (GM): How is it not its turn?
Wait, what happened?
Frezak (GM): I used a power that means that it can't get up until it's NEXT turn.
Apheori (GM): Oh, okay.
I can't read.
Can things do anything when they're prone?
Frezak (GM): most things.
They can't do most move actions.
They have to crawl, which is half speed and provokes, and they can't shift.
They have a -2 to any attacks they make.
Apheori (GM): They can still attack?
Frezak (GM): yup
Gaurav: I'm done making money, so Rhu can go next (after the stone monster thing) if you like.
Apheori (GM): I'd ask how the hell that's possible, but none of this makes sense anyway, so okay.
rolling 1d20 + 11 - 2 vs gravy ac
(
7
)
+11-2
=
16
Frezak (GM): imagine that I just pounded him to his groin into the floor.
that's a miss.
Ganelon: It's not like his arms are pinned.
Apheori (GM): Yeah, but you need space to swing/use most weapons.
Ganelon: Well, sure, but too much realism means convoluted rules.
Apheori (GM): Especially when everyone's so primitive.
Gaurav: He might just be stomping down on Gravy's foot with his fist or something.
Or with his feet.
Apheori (GM): It also has a go at bashing at Gravy's feet with its shield.
rolling 1d20 + 9 -2
(
15
)
+9-2
=
22
vs fort
Frezak (GM): yeah, that'll hit.
Apheori (GM): It knocks Gravy down too.
rolling 2d6 + 3 damage
(
2
+
3
)
+3
=
8
Ganelon: Shall I interrupt that?
Frezak (GM): nah
Ganelon: Just to mitigate damage, you understand.
It's not like Freya's lovely attack-stopper.
But so be it.
Apheori (GM): Amadi turn, then.
Gaurav: Could Rhu take his turn here?
Apheori (GM): Go for it.
Gaurav: I can't delay all the way to my next action, only to the end of the round, and it seems like a good idea to sit right after the stone thing.
Thanks!
Minor: Oath of Enmity against the stone thing. I specifically refer to him as stalagtite-droppings.
Standard: Radiant Vengeance, whee.
Does Rhu have a Holy Symbol? Does his little icon of Hazz' count?
Apheori (GM): I dunno, does he?
Gaurav: The sheet you made for him says he does, so I'm going to use that.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Rhu:
rolling d20+10 Bond of Retribution: Wisdom vs AC
(
7
)
+10
=
17
Gaurav: eeks
Frezak (GM): technically you have a +2 on that since he's prone.
Apheori (GM): No.
Gaurav: Also, I can re-roll
Apheori (GM): That one failed anyway.
Gaurav:
rolling d20+10
(
18
)
+10
=
28
better?
Frezak (GM): that might be just enough.
Apheori (GM): Much better.
Gaurav: Yay!
Apheori (GM): A hit.
Rhu:
rolling 2d6+5 damage
(
6
+
5
)
+5
=
16
Gaurav: Could somebody move Rhu to just before Amadi on the turn order?
Frezak (GM): done
Gaurav: Rhu's not going to move anywhere. End of turn.
Apheori (GM): Amadi is distracted by butterflies.
Ellemerr: So very distracted.
Apheori (GM): She sings something weird which is entirely unhelpful.
Gaurav: Will save!
Apheori (GM): Unless you want your turn, that's it.
Okay?
OKAY?
Ellemerr: Singing is good.
Apheori (GM): Seriously, though, if you need to do other stuff...
RADEK.
Ellemerr: Only sleep. >.> I'll... do that, then...
Bear Soup Guy: Sleep well!
Apheori (GM): Sweet nightmares, crazy person.
Ganelon: I should sleep /soon/ too, but I'm hardly passing out at the keyboard here, so let's see.
Gaurav: Take care, Ellemerr!
Ganelon: Ah, why not. Scouring Weapon.
This is the acid bullet.
(Rifle Weapon Attack 24)
-2 because he's shooting a prone target, against AC.
Apheori (GM): Yeah.
Whatsit do?
Ganelon:
rolling 2d10+6
(
10
+
2
)
+6
=
18
And the golem has... a -2 to its AC until the end of my next turn.
Put a little... broken shield thingy on it.
This thingy.
Apheori (GM): Naw, the thing's dead.
Ganelon: Oh.
Apheori (GM): Sorry, forgot the bloodied icon. >.<
I SUCK.
Gaurav: Do we want to kill it? We might want to ask it questions first.
Or Radek might be able to retrieve the answers from its corpse. Either-or.
Apheori (GM): Okay, it's very rapidly becoming dead, and is completely clonked.
Decide quickly.
Gaurav: How did the butterflies respond to the stone thing?
Apheori (GM): They flapped around it and tried to avoid it.
Ganelon: Uh...
Check for sentience?
If it's a golem we're not learning much that requires it to be functional.
Apheori (GM): It appears to at least have been sentient, though who knows what getting beat up by Gravy did to its higher brain functions.
Not a golem. You don't know what it is, though you could try to find out.
Radek rushes over to stop the thing from breaking down from damage that was almost definitely not his fault.
Gaurav: I wonder what living in a box for maybe years did to its mind.
Ganelon: Oh, don't worry.
Apheori (GM): Arcana or heal.
Ganelon: We have a translator for that.
Definitely Arcana, even if he is trained in Heal, too.
Radek: Prepare yourselves. I'm going to attempt to restore functionality to the thing.
The Gravedigger: So that it can hit us again?
Radek: ...It's intelligent. Well, capable of thought, at least.
And not much threat, besides.
rolling 1d20+16 Arcana
(
5
)
+16
=
21
Apheori (GM): It's like Dave and Amadi!
Ganelon: I dunno, Dave might be a threat.
Gaurav: Dave has a ridiculously dangerous rabbit in her pocket.
And Amadi ... can sing.
Apheori (GM): Aiight, you manage to put out the flames and stop the breakdown of the stone guy's parts. It's like it's some sort of converted creature, originally organic, but then turned to stone later.
Gaurav: It's petrified! Or ossified. That's pretty cool.
Radek: I thought this was a golem at first glance.
It looks like it used to be organic.
Ganelon: Hey, far as he's concerned, that's an improvement.
Radek: ...What a curious process.
Rhu: What was it in a box for?
Apheori (GM): You could try to wake it up and ask.
Radek: Better to ask the thing itself.
Ganelon: Beat me to it.
How does one wake up a stone person?
Rhu tries to poke it with a finger
Bear Soup Guy: I'm going to need to take care of responsibility stuffs, so I hope nobody minds if I ask if we can wrap things up
Alternately Greibel would be happy to go back to being butterflies for a while
Apheori (GM): This probably is a pretty good place.
Ganelon: Yeah...
Apheori (GM): Yall have something to interrogate, then other stuff.
So next time you can totally interrogate it.
Gaurav: And loot this tower.
Ganelon: Before this genius idea slips away, we should threaten it with erosion.
That'll put the fear (and gradually water) into the heart of this captive.
Apheori (GM): Goo plan.
Good
Gaurav: Hee.
Apheori (GM): Let s sort out timing on skype.
Gaurav: We were speaking of magic towers earlier, hopefully the tower doesn't turn out to be it's mummy or something.
Frezak (GM): Well, Mimic Towers ARE a thing.
Gaurav: 0.0
Frezak (GM): Mimics so big that they mimic a whole tower.
And then there's a subspecies that can imitate PEOPLE /just/ well enough to get someone to walk into a tower.
Gaurav: Wow.
Apheori (GM): For the record: Today was 4 Janurary.
january

Session 43

Apheori (GM): Hmm.
So you all beat a stone guy up.
Were going to interrogate him.
Something happened to Gravy.
Ganelon: We beat him up and then fixed him up in very short order.
Apheori (GM): I'm not sure what yet.
Gaurav: Does the stone guy have any pockets?
Apheori (GM): Yeah, he's wearing stone clothes, with stone pockets, probably full of stone.
Gaurav: He's a credit to his stonemason.
Ellemerr: My pockets are better.
Rhu:
rolling d20+15 perception check on the box the stone man was in
(
12
)
+15
=
27
Apheori (GM): It's a box. Bit of a crate. Was originally nailed shut, but from the look of it he hadn't been nailed in.
Also, for anyone with perception: Gravy disappears.
Gaurav: There's a good chance your pockets contain multiple stone guys with stone pockets all of their own.
Ganelon: I assume you mean "basic observational skills" and not actual training in Perception.
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Ganelon: Okay, good.
Apheori (GM): Amadi: There are still butterflies everywhere, though a lot of ones on the floor have been smashed.
Radek: ...Oh. /Marvelous./
Apheori (GM): Unless someone got rid of them.
I can't remember. Did anyone?
Ganelon: I didn't do anything to the butterflies.
Apheori (GM): Okay, yeah, still there.
Ganelon: Radek commented on them being a waste of magical effort.
Possibly their feelings were hurt.
Amadi tries to comfort any possibly hurt feelings.
Apheori (GM): Butterflies flutter around Amadi.
Ganelon: "a flamboyant waste of resources" was the exact phrasing.
Apheori (GM): Dawn bats at them.
Rhu: Any comment on the missing Gravy? DO STUFF DAMMIT.
Gaurav: The only way Rhu gets a 27 on a perception check is if he's been sitting staring at that box for at least 15 minutes.
And no. He just thinks Gravy might have stepped out or gone upstairs. Is the spiral staircase still in one piece?
Radek rises to his feet and glances back at Amadi and Dawn. He doesn't take particular care to address one over the other.
Radek: Was that your doing?
Amadi says immediately and at once "yes" and "no" at the same time.
Ellemerr: Wow. Immediately AND at once. I am so good at this word-stuff.
Dawn: (after an entirely too long pause, scrunching her face up in concentration) ...maybe.
Radek 's scowl deepens.
Apheori (GM): The stairs are fine.
What about the stone guy? He's watching you somewhat fearfully.
Amadi tells the butterflies that "flamboyant" is a really good thing to be. Anything that sounds that fancy has to be good. Flamboyant!
Apheori (GM): A bit afraid you'll smack him again.
Dawn nods vaguely and wanders over toward Rhu and Radek and the stone guy.
Radek returns his attention towards the Stone Guy, still scowling.
Radek: Say something.
Rhu walks up the stairs as far as he can without losing sight of the rest of the party.
Stone guy: Uh... hi?
Apheori (GM): Rhu: Any attempts at stealth?
Radek: Good enough - you can speak.
Ganelon: That seems like a strange thing to ask, regarding Rhu.
Apheori (GM): Point taken.
Rhu: Perception.
Gaurav: Heh, what he said. Also: I imagine we made quite a bit of noise attacking a hunk of walking stone, so.
Rhu:
rolling d20+15 perception check
(
1
)
+15
=
16
Apheori (GM): o.O
Ganelon: Hey, he's not /that/ attractive, is he?
Gaurav: I see NOTHING
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You hear something horrible and fall down the stairs.
Radek twitches just barely at the sounds of assumed incompetence, but otherwise remains focused.
(To Greibel): Something horrible sounds like an irate dragon, disturbed in particular by the /approach/ of the insolent small things, getting up upstairs.
Rhu: (comically rolling to a stop near Radek's feet, muffled from getting his cloak tied up around his head) Thr's sth hrble up thr.
Gaurav: Damage?
The porridge 's eyes widen
Ganelon: The porridge has eyes?
Bear Soup Guy: lulwhat
Apheori (GM): I should stop rolling dice.
Greibel 's eyes widen
Apheori (GM): Rhu takes four points of damage.
Bear Soup Guy: The porridge too
They're linked together now
Apheori (GM): The porridge can MAKE eyes, man.
Bear Soup Guy: Imagine the porridge's mock eyes just exactly mimic everything Greibel's eyes do
Gaurav: Where is the porridge? Bring its cute little icon back.
Apheori (GM): It'd be on Greibel.
Wiggling.
Surprised.
Bear Soup Guy: Mimicking Greibel's facial expressions
Gaurav: That's both adorable and creepy.
Bear Soup Guy: It should be
Rhu gets back to his feet, untangling his cloak as he goes.
Radek looks down at Rhu, then back at the Stone Guy.
Radek: I wish to understand your circumstances. Why were you turned to stone?
...And then stored in a box?
Stone guy: Um...
Amadi places a number of butterflies on Dawn.
Stone guy: Hiding.
Radek: From what?
Dawn goes and looms over the stone guy, juggling butterflies.
Greibel looks up toward the upstairs ominously
Ganelon: That must be some slow juggling.
Or some very cooperative butterflies.
Rhu looks down at his boots. They need cleaning.
Stone guy: (pointing toward Greibel) From the thing he's looking at.
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Dawn: Yes.
Radek glances towards Greibel, then the ceiling.
Ganelon: I'm guessing he does not See.
Rhu walks over to the door and glances outside.
Rhu: Where's Gravy?
Apheori (GM): Radek just sees ceiling and a set of stairs up.
Percpetion?
Dawn: Oh, he's not here.
Elsewhere, probably.
Greibel mouths words and gestures toward Radek and back to the ceiling
Dawn suddenly looks confused.
Greibel exaggerates mouthing the word "Dragon."
Ganelon: I'll roll but you might be asking Gaurav rather than me.
Stone guy: Look, guys, I don't mean to be rude, but this has all been a huge misunderstanding.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+10 Perception
(
2
)
+10
=
12
Stone guy: So can I... maybe... go?
Rhu: (to Dawn) ... oh.
Ganelon: Oh yeah, he definitely sees nothing.
Apheori (GM): Yeah, doesn't hear anything in particular either.
Aside from A WHOLE LOT OF BUTTERFLIES.
And annoying people.
Amadi has found some of the more damaged butterflies and is trying to teach them how to fly again. She's particularly persistent towards the butterflies that have lost a wing.
Radek speaks absently.
Radek: Go where?
Stone guy: Um... away.
Out.
Somewhere that isn't here.
Radek: ...Could I have one of your limbs, first?
For study.
Apheori (GM): The butterflies Amadi is working with fail to fly, but a few manage to float in a rather disorganised fashion, tumbling about even more ridiculously than the normal flight patterns of butterflies.
Stone guy: Er.
I'd rather you didn't?
Kind of attached to them.
Dawn: We can fix that.
Dawn grins maniacally.
Radek: Emotionally, physically, or both?
Greibel: Draaaaaaaaaaaaaaaagoooonnnn......
Dawn offers Radek a giant pair of scissors.
Greibel flaps his arms like a dragon and points up
Stone guy: Yes, yes!
Radek makes a "hush" motion at Greibel.
Radek: That was not a yes or no question, sir.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: More perception.
Amadi flaps her arms too, but more like a butterfly.
Greibel:
rolling 1d20+12
(
19
)
+12
=
31
Stone guy: (now, somehow, looking very flustered, especially for stone) That is... both.
Please, just let me go.
Rhu: (to stone guy) Stay with us, we'll keep you safe.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: It seems to be settling down a bit.
Dawn: (making quotes with her fingers) Safe.
Radek grumbles.
Radek: Fine, do what you like. Live to delay the advancement of knowledge another day.
Rhu: We'll only throw you at our enemies very, very occasionally.
Stone guy gets up uncertainly.
Radek gives him some space, but grumpily.
Stone guy flees.
Ganelon: It's like this guy doesn't even appreciate the medical applications of turning people to living stone.
Radek: What a waste...
Radek sighs and turns back to Greibel.
Radek: Now, you wanted something?
Greibel blinks
Rhu: Some day we will fight shoulder-to-shoulder with a cool stone dude. But it is not this day.
Greibel: I think there's a dragon upstairs
Radek: ...Ah.
Greibel: Yeah
Dawn: It's fine. It's a small one.
Radek tries to look less concerned so his ignoring it earlier seems more justified.
Greibel: Where there are small dragons, there'll be big dragons coming back to find them
Amadi: That depends entirely on the breed of dragon, the size of the cave, and whether you had any blood pudding last week.
Greibel turns to Dave worryingly
Greibel: I /did/ have blood pudding last week!
Greibel turns to Amadi
Greibel: I DID!
Dawn: I might have had blood pudding.
Rhu: I crawled through an eldritch abomination two nights ago, does that count?
Dawn: Was that the soupy stuff with the weird bits?
Amadi: No, Dawn, it's the wriggly green stuff.
Dawn: Oh.
Amadi: Yes.
Radek facepalms.
Radek: This is a wizard's tower. If a dragon inhabits it, it is - or more likely, was - a captive.
(To Amadi): Also I think Rhu's thing in the horrible nightmare realm might have just been a hallucination due to the pills Greibel gave him shortly before.
(From Amadi): Okay. O_o
Rhu: Maybe it's hiding, like the stone guy was. Maybe there's something ever scarier on the top floor.
Amadi: I could go to the top floor and be the scarier thing!
(To Amadi): Although considering where you are and all that, it's doubtful a hallucination that powerful wouldn't be at least partly real, too.
Ganelon: I'm trying to think of a reason to discourage that plan.
Apheori (GM): Is there one? Is there?
Ganelon: ...I can't think of one.
Amadi: I'd be a really good scarier thing. I can rawr. RAWR!
Dawn: RAAAAWR!
Ganelon: "It puts Amadi in danger" seems unlikely.
Greibel blinks
Dawn makes a bit of a wind with her rawr.
Ganelon: "She's unlikely to be convincingly scary" is probably /true/, but a low chance of success for no risk is still a good idea.
Amadi: ... Or Dawn could do it, I guess.
Gaurav: Are there stairs going downstairs from where we are?
Dawn beams. It's slightly adorable and also a bit pathetic.
Apheori (GM): I think they only go up.
Ganelon: Wizards don't need basements.
Their compulsive hoarding tendencies extend to all rooms of their houses already.
Gaurav: Why not? Where do they keep old bicycles and play D&D?
Apheori (GM): In the main rooms, of course.
Ganelon: Bicycles go in the shed.
They play D&D in demiplanes.
Those things are great, incidentally. You can make the progression of time faster or slower.
Gaurav: Huh. Cool!
Ganelon: So if the group can only meet for an hour, you can still squeeze in a six hour session in Steve's demiplane.
Apheori (GM): I'll take ten.
Gaurav: I suppose we should go upstairs and say hi to this dragon.
Given that we came here to look for wizards or knowledge or magic objects, and we've found none so far, except the one that ran away.
Apheori (GM): Amadi can go say hi.
Or not.
Radek: ...
Apheori (GM): I unno.
I love Radek.
Radek: Well go on, then.
I don't care which one of you does it. You could both try to be frightening at once, for all it matters.
Amadi grins happily, takes Dawn's hand, scoops up a number of butterflies, places these on both their shoulders, and commands the butterflies to fly them upstairs.
Apheori (GM): Amadi: d20
Amadi:
rolling 1d20
(
16
)
=
16
Ganelon: Presumably through the ceiling, though what are obstacles to Amadi?
Gaurav: Optional.
Apheori (GM): Somehow, the butterflies do, picking up the both of them and drawing them slowly upward... through the ceiling.
And then through the dragon.
Ganelon: "She emerges on the other end in a spray of blood and viscera."
Apheori (GM): And then through the air above the dragon as the dragon suddenly startles and takes a swipe at them with its claws.
Amadi: Do anything, or keep going?
Greibel: Well
They're with God now.
Amadi blows the dragon a kiss and keeps going.
Radek: ...They /are/ gods.
What is that even- ugh, never mind.
Apheori (GM) tries to dodge away from the claws and falls out of the butterflies, landing in front of the dragon, while Amadi, meanwhile, drifts through that ceiling, too.
Radek shakes his head and walks over to wait on the stairs for pretty much any kind of result.
Amadi shows no real concern at her loss of Dawn.
Ganelon: Wow, what a fantastic ally.
Apheori (GM): Amadi drifts up through the floor of a room that turns out to be full of magical treasure and a bunch of zombies, which all completely fail to notice her.
Rhu: We don't still have that flying disk the mouse forged would ride on, do we?
Apheori (GM): Radek: Perception.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+10
(
1
)
+10
=
11
Apheori (GM): Radek hears some loud clunks.
Rhu: Or maybe we could climb up the outside of the tower. Maybe it's a blind, deaf dragon?
Amadi shrugs, lands gently, and does her scariest rawr.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: It sounds like fighting above you.
Ellemerr: Which I should probably also roll for.
Apheori (GM): ROLL.
Ellemerr:
rolling 1d20
(
8
)
=
8
Hm.
Radek: Tenser's Floating Disk.
Apheori (GM): Add something bardy to that.
That's basically an attack.
Amadi:
^
Ellemerr: Bluff +13?
Apheori (GM): Sure, why not.
Okay, yeah, the zombies all panic and run away.
Down the stairs.
Toward the dragon.
Radek: It is a magical force construct.
Ellemerr: There's a grandfather singing opera above me. I thought you'd all like to know.
Apheori (GM): Which is trying to smash, claw, bite, and breathe on Dawn.
Gaurav: 0.0
Apheori (GM): Fancy.
Ellemerr: Hopefully my plan to distract the dragon with zombies is working.
Radek: I don't have a copy of the ritual. Your best hope is that we might find one in here
Apheori (GM): Meanwhile sounds of clunks, bangs, roars, scrapes, and tearing come down the stairs.
Along with a sort of horrible wailing.
(or up the stairs, in Amadi's case)
Rhu runs up the staircase, maul drawn.
Apheori (GM): Dawn yells something about how they will all taste her superweapon.
Radek follows after him.
Dawn: (yelling) Bow before the power of BUNNNNY!
Amadi saunters down the stairs, hoping that she'll turn out to have perfect timing for being a superweapon.
Apheori (GM): Does Greibel go too?
Amadi stops for a moment, considering whether she should try looking like a bunny and then deciding against it. Some things are /too/ scary. Even for fragments of gods.
Rhu stops running at the mention of "bunny", walking up slowly and carefully instead.
Apheori (GM): Everyone roll initiative.
Amadi:
rolling 1d20 + 3
(
13
)
+3
=
16
Apheori (GM): Actually, scratch that.
In this case it'd just be determined by order up/down the stairs.
Ganelon: So that's... what?
Rhu before Radek before Greibel.
Gaurav: Can you move Rhu to the top of the stairs? I'm not sure where they emerge.
Thanks! So who starts initiative? And is the dragon visibly attacking Dawn at this point?
Apheori (GM): Hold on, still need all the zombies.
Um.
Greibel: Back! Sorry, went afk for a few minutes
Gaurav: That is a very sinister bunny.
Ellemerr: brb
Bear Soup Guy: Oop, Greibel didn't go afk, I did.
Greibel can say that too though, sure.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Four-way mad fight.
Ganelon: That better be a Monty Python bunny or it won't be four ways for long.
Apheori (GM): It might be.
So you all spill into the room to find Dawn has apparently been carrying that bunny from before around all this time and has thrown it at the dragon.
And apparently it did some serious damage.
Ganelon: Actually, if it is a Monty Python bunny it still won't be four ways for long because we'll all be dead.
Apheori (GM): There are also several zombies wandering around in frightened confusion.
And an Amadi at the top of the stairs.
Amadi looks very aloof. She's so proud of her own terrifyingness.
Gaurav: The best strategy might be for us, the zombies and the dragon to unite as one against the rabbit.
Dawn: Will you all bow before me! I am the might and wrath and judgement of... uh, the flying spaghetti monster! BOW DOWN!
Noodly appendatures!
Apheori (GM): For some reason the command is oddly compelling.
Do any of you do anything?
Rhu just stares at the whole confused mess. I assume there's blood everywhere?
Apheori (GM): Yes.
A zombie falls over dead.
Amadi does not bow down. She's twice as scary as any spagetti monster, flying or otherwise.
Rhu: Ew.
Apheori (GM): Dawn looks very disappointed.
Greibel: Mmmmm, spaghettiiiii....
Apheori (GM): The dragon bites at the bunny and misses.
The bunny bites back.
Also misses.
Amadi.
GO.
DO STUFF.
Apheori (GM): ACTUAL TURN.
Amadi roars again, this time focusing her scaryness towards the dragon.
Ellemerr: Focused Sound attack:
rolling 1d20 + 6
(
4
)
+6
=
10
Aaaand I miss. >.>
Apheori (GM): fOO.
Anything else?
Amadi looks thoroughly disappointed and sits down on her stair to sulk.
Apheori (GM): Rhu!
Gaurav: Move action: 3 squares
Would a close burst 5 from this spot hit all the undeads, or should I take a step SW?
Oh, actually, never mind. It only targets one thing.
Standard action: Radiant Vengeance against the zombie closest to Dawn
Apheori (GM): I like how we've got two very disappointed god fragments on either side of this.
Gaurav:
rolling d20+8 vs Reflex including Holy Symbol
(
3
)
+8
=
11
eeks
Apheori (GM): Yup.
Remember, they are zombies.
Gaurav: oh yay!
Ellemerr: We have very good reasons to be disappointed.
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Gaurav:
rolling 1d8+5 radiant damage
(
6
)
+5
=
11
not sure if the divine keyword makes the damage worse or anything
Apheori (GM): +5
Gaurav: and I get 5 temp HP
Apheori (GM): Aiight.
Put the icon on yourself.
Gaurav: I'm not going to Oath of Enmity anyone as I don't know who's dangerous yet
Apheori (GM): Radek?
Everyone's dangerous. Except the zombies.
Bear Soup Guy: Hint: The dragon is dangerous
Apheori (GM): Although there are a lot of them.
Ganelon: Oh, Radek's turn is easy.
Apheori (GM): The dragon survived monty python bunny.
Gaurav: It survived one round. I don't trust the bunny rabbit.
What's the temp HP icon?
That?
Oh. Thanks!
Apheori (GM): Usually that.
But I got the number wrong.
Go fix it.
While the scientist does stuff.
Ganelon: Well this turn is real easy.
Radek summons Kepler 4, the eyebot.
And as a standard action that's most of what he does, but it ought to add to the chaos.
Apheori (GM): Heee.
Ganelon: No need to move and nobody's hurt, so he ends his turn on the stairs.
Apheori (GM): Greibel!
Gaurav: Do the robots fly high enough that people can walk under them, or do they obstruct movement?
Apheori (GM): That one's high.
Ganelon: It's too small to actually occupy space.
And it's flying 3 squares above the floor.
Gaurav: Cool.
Bear Soup Guy: This is my favorite
Greibel shouts to the heavens for a storm to purge the dragon taint
Apheori (GM): A storm coalesces on the ceiling.
Greibel:
rolling 1d20+8 vs dragon reflex
(
6
)
+8
=
14
Apheori (GM): Nope.
Bear Soup Guy: The storm quietly disperses and Greibel is sad
Gaurav: Aww
Apheori (GM): It got off a lightning. It just missed.
Poor griebel.
At this rate everyone will be sad.
Bear Soup Guy: Those storm Gods will rue the day they made Greibel sad
End turn
Apheori (GM): The zombies make zombie noises and mill around.
The one Rhu hit at goes for him.
Gaurav: Rhu is happy! He's surrounded by putrefying, soon-to-be-dead undead. Best feeling in the world.
Apheori (GM): 18 vs ac?
Gaurav: Too weak!
Rhu's AC is 20
Rhu hit the one closest to Dawn
Apheori (GM): Oh. I thought you meant closes to Rhu.
I don't think that one would have hit at all, since it was obstructed.
Frezak (GM): Yo.
Ganelon: Welcome back.
Apheori (GM): Wait, no, that one's dead.
Ganelon: You joined just in time to witness utter chaos.
Apheori (GM): Okay, fine.
Frezak (GM): Oh, great, a rodent.
Apheori (GM): NEarest one takes a swipe at Rhu and misses.
Frezak (GM): That's not unusual, Gan.
Apheori (GM): One near dawn takes a swipe at the bunny.
Frezak (GM): A rabbit and zombies, eh?
HMMMM.
Apheori (GM): It slams the bunny.
Frezak (GM): I USE HELLSWORN BLE- no, wrong game.
Gaurav: Lagomorphs aren't rodents.
Apheori (GM): Another one goes and tries to grab Rhu.
Frezak: Gravy disappeared and nobody even bothered to investigate.
Gaurav: Wait! If it crosses near me, I get an opportunity attack.
Frezak (GM): That's cold.
Apheori (GM): It went up to you.
Frezak (GM): He's the heart and soul of the party.
Apheori (GM): I keep forgetting diagonals work.
13 vs reflex?
Gaurav: 17 Reflex!
Ganelon: Investigate?
Apheori (GM): It tries to grab Rhu and fails.
Ganelon: I asked Amadi if she was responsible.
She said yes and no at the same time. Dawn added "maybe".
Apheori (GM): Other zombie ambles up to Dawn and makes funny noises at her.
Dawn's anti-undead thing is better than Rhu's.
Bear Soup Guy: That's why Dawn is a God and Rhu is a worshipper
Apheori (GM): Heee.
Ganelon: Why do the gods hate zombies so much anyways?
Like /all/ of the gods, too.
Gaurav: They gross them out.
Ganelon: But there's undoubtedly gods of gross things.
Bear Soup Guy: Gods /are/ used to a certain level of cleanliness
Apheori (GM): So Dawn shoots at the dragon and gets smacked in the face by a zombies.
-s
This is why gods hate zombies.
They do stuff like that.
Gaurav: Rhu's is really, really good -- but only if there's one massive undead to put the hurt on. It's an enounter power, so I'll probably spend it on the last zombie round, but it's a bit of a waste when there's lot of zombies (hopefully with low HPs?) milling around.
Ganelon: If she succeeds...
Eyebot does 5 damage.
Apheori (GM): On multiple targets? It was at the dragon, hit a zombie too.
Ganelon: Anything that gets hit!
Apheori (GM): Aiight.
Ganelon: Just hit, though.
Apheori (GM): She yells at the zombie and wipes zombie grossness off her face.
Dragon breathes lightning at the bunny.
Gaurav: brb
Apheori (GM): Zombie gets breathed on too and makes a really, really awful charred smell.
Ganelon: Eyebot shoots!
Apheori (GM): At which?
Ganelon: Whoever got hit.
Apheori (GM): Does it just shoot any enemies?
That get hit?
By anything?
Ganelon: Any enemies of mine that get hit by any attack.
Apheori (GM): Heh.
Frezak (GM): WHen an ally hits an enemy.
Ganelon: Oh.
Right, sorry, that's correct.
It doesn't shoot for my enemies when they betray each other.
Apheori (GM): Ah.
So no shooting now.
Ganelon: Yes. My apologies.
Apheori (GM): Bunny tears the nearest zombie apart and makes a horrible screeching noise.
Gaurav shudders.
Radek wishes that Gravy - and by extension Codrichun - were right right about now.
Ganelon: Were here*
Apheori (GM): 16 vs rhu fortitude?
Gaurav: Hit. Rhu's Fort is 15.
Apheori (GM): 12 thunder damage and he's dazed.
A zombie falls over.
Gaurav: Eeks.
Apheori (GM): Save ends.
Gaurav: What's the icon for dazed?
Apheori (GM): And the bunny slid away.
Ganelon: I usually go with the lightning bold.
Bolt*
Apheori (GM): The bunny is a hell of a pokemon.
Amadi, you're up.
Ellemerr: Let her attempt to wrestle control of the bunny. Song of Discord.
rolling 1d20 + 6
(
7
)
+6
=
13
That's against will. >.>
Apheori (GM): Nope.
Ellemerr: Didn't think so.
Apheori (GM): So close, too.
The thing has like no will.
Frezak (GM): Even on a miss you make it attack itself
Ellemerr: Yeah.
Frezak (GM): Or whoever is in range.
Dawn: Hey! That's my bunny! Get your own!
Apheori (GM): So what happens?
Ellemerr: Well, it doesn't affect movement, and I don't want it attacking Dawn, so... I just made a suicidal bunny.
Amadi: Learn to share, Dawnie!
Ellemerr: So make a bunny attack against bunny.
And hopefully it's better at hitting than I am.
Apheori (GM): It attacks and somehow blinds itself.
Ellemerr: Cool.
Gaurav: o.0
Frezak (GM): Claws itself on the eye.
Ganelon: Ears cover its eyes.
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Ellemerr: Heh.
Well, that's it from me.
Apheori (GM): Which icon should that be?
Frezak: Would you like to join in and add to the chaos?
Frezak (GM): Sure.
Apheori (GM): There's a bit of a magical surge behind the dragon and while nothing appears, those of you who aren't Rhu will notice that the Gravedigger is suddenly... there.
Except he's invisible.
Frezak (GM): Hmm.
Ganelon: Put him on the tracker somewhere.
Gaurav: Does Gravy go now in the initiative order, or should Rhu take his turn?
(To Frezak): You apparently triggered something magical, which de-synced you with the rest of existence so while you could go around and watch things, you couldn't actually interact with anything and noone could see you. Then you probably dug or something back into normal space but you're still invisible or something.
Apheori (GM): Yeah, sorry.
Gravy! Go!
Frezak (GM): Gravy opens his mouth to shout GRRAAAAAAAVES
then doesn't because he's being sneaky.
Ganelon: No-one sees him open his invisible mouth.
Frezak (GM): And just jumps up to smash the dragon on the head.
Apheori (GM): Amadi might.
Frezak (GM): Rules question.
Am I Hidden from the dragon?
Apheori (GM): Sure, why not.
What's that mean?
Frezak (GM): I just get Combat Advantage.
Apheori (GM): Ah.
Yeah. Add that or whatever.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+10+2
(
12
)
+10+2
=
24
Dragon AC
Ganelon: Eyebot shoots.
Apheori (GM): Yup.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D10+5 And the dragon is prone and can't stand up next turn.
(
6
)
+5
=
11
And I mark it.
Apheori (GM): The dragon smacks back with a wing and blocks part of it.
I assume 16 vs ac doesn't actually hit back.
Frezak (GM): No.
Does.... Rhu need to gget away from the zombies?
Apheori (GM): Rhu's up, I guess?
Frezak (GM): I mean I have a power to move him.
If he needs it.
Gaurav: Nah. I think he's happy keeping these two zombies busy while you guys deal some damage on the dragon. Plus, he's scared of the bunny.
Frezak (GM): hokay.
Am I still invisible?
Apheori (GM): Oddly, yes.
Frezak (GM): Sweeeeet
Apheori (GM): That's it, then?
Frezak (GM): yup
Gaurav: Okay, so "dazed" means I only have a single action this turn. Hmm.
I swing my maul at the prone zombie, chanting retribution at him as I do
Ganelon: Don't you have that channel divinity thing to do ridiculous damage to zombies?
Gaurav: I'm saving it up for the zombie that's far away. It's got a pull and an immobilize, so I don't want to waste it on something right next to me.
rolling d20+10 vs AC on the prone zombie
(
5
)
+10
=
15
Apheori (GM): Yup.
Gaurav:
rolling 2d6+5 radiant damage
(
4
+
6
)
+5
=
15
Apheori (GM): It's dead.
Gaurav: Yay!
rolling d20 save against dazed
(
17
)
=
17
Bear Soup Guy: Rhu - Zombie Hunter
Apheori (GM): How does 'save ends' work? >.>
Ganelon: At the end of his turn.
He rolls 1d20.
Frezak (GM): roll a D20 at the end of your turn.
Ganelon: 10 or more means the effect ends.
Apheori (GM): Ah, neat.
Gaurav: Since I'm dazed, this _is_ the end of my turn.
Apheori (GM): But now you're better and it's Radek's turn.
Gaurav: Yay!
I need to go rush into the shower so I can leave for work as late as possible. If you need Rhu's defences, they are: AC 20, FORT 15, REF 17, WILL 19. I'll be back as soon as I can!
Apheori (GM): GAAAAN.
Ganelon: YES YES
UM
What are our thoughts on bunny killing? Yes, no, or "wait until it's the last thing standing"?
Frezak (GM): I'm cool with chopping it up.
Ellemerr: Dawn might be upset. It IS her bunny.
Apheori (GM): There is that.
Ganelon: Right.
Apheori (GM): So what's it going to be?
Ganelon: Then I'll just shoot the acid bullet at our dragon friend, here.
(Rifle Weapon Attack 31)
Subtract 2 from that (it doesn't matter).
Apheori (GM): Yup.
Ganelon:
rolling 2d10+6 Acid
(
9
+
4
)
+6
=
19
And it has a -2 to AC until the end of my next turn.
Give it a... cracked shield icon.
As a move action I command the eyebot to relocate.
That ends my turn.
Apheori (GM): Greibel!
Bear Soup Guy: GREIBEL!
I shall Call Forth The Spirit Pack on this dragon
rolling 1d20+8 vs reflex
(
1
)
+8
=
9
Oh balls
Apheori (GM): >.<
Bear Soup Guy: Greibel always has the worst attack rolls
Apheori (GM): It misses.
Bear Soup Guy: Greibel sulks and ends his turn
Apheori (GM): Zombies try to beat the folks next to them to death.
They both just miss.
(folks in question being rhu and dawn, for clarification)
Dawn tries to go to the bunny, the zombie next to her grabs onto her leg and she falls over, so she just crawls the rest of the way to it with a zombie attached to her leg and stuffs the bunny in her pocket.
Dawn: Bunny.
Apheori (GM): While lying face down on the ground with a zombie stuck to her.
Frezak (GM): LIke a real adventurer.
ANd just reminding you that the dragon can't stand this turn.
Apheori (GM): What would be the dragon's ability to hit Gravy due to its and his conditions?
Frezak (GM): If I'm invisible?
And it's prone?
Apheori (GM): Mhm.
Frezak (GM): Chances of hitting me are minimal.
Apheori (GM): I need a number.
Frezak (GM): I have +5 defenses against things that can't see me, and attacking while prone is at -2.
Apheori (GM): It roars and looks scary, even off the floor, threatening at Gravy, Radek, and Greibel.
Ganelon: He's also Gravy, who is naturally unhittable.
Apheori (GM): 15 vs Greibel will?
Bear Soup Guy: Miss
Apheori (GM): Aiight, nothing really happens.
Fails on all of you.
Nice seriies of exceedingly bad roles.
Even before the modifiers. >.<
Amadi: Still awake?
Ellemerr: Yes.
For another 15 mins or so.
Apheori (GM): GO.
Ellemerr: Let's scream in annoyance at the dragon, because we're upset with our bad rolls, yes we are. Staggering Note.
rolling 1d20 + 6
(
11
)
+6
=
17
vs will
Apheori (GM): Yup.
Ganelon: Eyebot shoots.
Frezak (GM): That eyebot.
Overclocked much?
Ellemerr: It takes 4 dmg and Gravy gets to attack it as well.
Frezak (GM): sweeeet
rolling 1D20+10+2
(
15
)
+10+2
=
27
And it has -2 AC from radek.
Apheori (GM): Yeah.
Ellemerr: And I should push it two but uh.
Ganelon: Eyebot shoots AGAIN!
Apheori (GM): It swings back at Gravy. Misses due to yet another bad roll.
Ganelon: Kepler 4 is /carrying/ this party.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D10+5+5
(
6
)
+5+5
=
16
Apheori (GM): At some point I would like a roll higher than 7.
It would be nice.
Amadi do anything else?
Ellemerr: Naw.
Apheori (GM): Then Gravy can have at it even more.
Frezak (GM): Okay.
I start with Weight Of earth
rolling 1D20+10+2
(
13
)
+10+2
=
25
Apheori (GM): Yup.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D10+5+5
(
7
)
+5+5
=
17
And it is slowed.
ANd takes eyebot damage AGAIN
Still alive?
Apheori (GM): Yes.
What all does slow do?
Frezak (GM): reduces speed to 2.
And then I use a Minor Action to use my Chainreach SHovel attack.
rolling 1D20+10+2
(
3
)
+10+2
=
15
AC
bah
Apheori (GM): Nope.
Ganelon: Yes, all hits are punished with eyebot lasers.
Frezak (GM): that's it, then.
Gaurav: Rhu!
I don't need to shift to move away from this zombie, do I?
Move action: three squares back.
Apheori (GM) shrugs.
Gaurav: Are we using our dailies yet?
Apheori (GM): The zombie attempts to latch onto your leg as well and fails miserably.
Ellemerr: I did one. :P It's up to you, innit?
Apheori (GM): Congratulations, you can do at least one thing better than Dawn can.
Dawn used both of hers. XD
Gaurav: Minor action: Oath of Enmity against the dragon (now that the bunny is safely tucked away ...)
Apheori (GM): Not sure she's a good example to follow, though.
Yes?
Gaurav: Nah, I'll save my daily.
What's the minimum distance for a charge?
Frezak (GM): 2 squares of free space to reach target.
Gaurav: Sweet. I charge the two spaces to the dragon and let fly with a Whirlwind Charge.
Ganelon: Radek's summons are all dailies.
Gaurav:
rolling d20+10 vs AC against the dragon
(
5
)
+10
=
15
Frezak (GM): Well.
That's... upt to 19 AC.
20, possibly.
Gaurav: This is a melee attack and I have no enemies close to me. So Oath of Enmity says I can reroll.
rolling d20+10 vs AC
(
5
)
+10
=
15
HA
well
Apheori (GM): Heh.
Gaurav: Rhu charges at the dragon swinging wildly.
Ganelon: Well it does have...
-4 to defenses?
Apheori (GM): Yeah, that actually works.
Gaurav: YAY
rolling 4d6+5 damage
(
2
+
1
+
5
+
6
)
+5
=
19
end of my turn
Apheori (GM): The dragon smacks at Rhu when he does that.
23 vs ac?
Gaurav: total hit. Rhu's AC is 20
Apheori (GM): 10 damage.
Gaurav: I assume Rhu charged straight into its tail or something.
Apheori (GM): It's about time. It's been trying to do that every time so far.
Gaurav: Rhu's in Oath of Enmity mode, so he's not really paying attention to anything apart from hurting the dragon. It makes sense.
Frezak (GM): Uhhhhh
Waaaait
It has -2 to attack Rhu from my mark.
And attacking someone else lets me attack it.
Gaurav: Anyway, I have to run to work now! Sorry about that. I can be back online in 1.5 hours if you guys are still around.
Apheori (GM): You can interrupt interrrupts?
Oh gods.
Ganelon: You can do more than that!
Bear Soup Guy: Bye Gaur!
Frezak (GM): yep
Apheori (GM): No wonder people find the combat in this edition so tedious.
Ganelon: I interrupt Gravy's interrupt to interrupt the dragon's interrupt, with my own interrupt.
(Yes I'm serious)
Apheori (GM): Do your rolls.
Ganelon: I use Shocking Feedback.
It's an attack, reduces damage that he takes if I hit his attacker.
(Rifle Weapon Attack 26)
Apheori (GM): Aye.
Ganelon:
rolling 2d10+5 lightning
(
9
+
2
)
+5
=
16
Rhu's damage from the attack is reduced by 5. That's all.
Although if Gravy hits, the eyebot shoots.
Lest we forget.
Gaurav: byeeeeee. feel free to keep going without me or to play Rhu if you like: https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u/19429772/dnd-skype/Rhu.pdf
Apheori (GM): Gravy?
Frezak (GM): I... can't roll.
Ganelon: Rolling for Frezak.
Apheori (GM): O_o
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+10+2
(
6
)
+10+2
=
18
Ganelon shrugs.
Apheori (GM): Hit.
Ganelon: He says his R20 is crashed.
rolling 1d10+10
(
7
)
+10
=
17
That's his damage, it grants combat advantage to all allies for a round, and... eyebot shoots for 5.
Apheori (GM): >.<
Ganelon: This dragon should just give up.
Poor thing.
Apheori (GM): I suppose it can't hit back when something hit it back for hitting back.
Ganelon: Nah, you're limited to one interrupt per round per person.
Technically one immediate action of any sort.
Ellemerr: I have to sleep now.
Apheori (GM): Sleep amidst sweet nightmares, beloved.
Ellemerr: Thank you, dearest. I hope you will be blessed with delightful daydreams.
Apheori (GM): Always.
Bear Soup Guy: Bye Ellemerr!
Apheori (GM): Well, usually.
So, uh, Radek's turn?
Ganelon: He'll just shoot some relatively ordinary bullets at it.
(Rifle Weapon Attack 15)
Bluh.
Alright that's all he does.
Apheori (GM): vs what?
Ganelon: AC.
Apheori (GM): Ah, okay.
Yeah, that misses.
Greibel?
Bear Soup Guy: FIRE HAWK
rolling 1d20+8 vs dragon reflex
(
14
)
+8
=
22
Apheori (GM): Yup.
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d8+4 damage!
(
2
)
+4
=
6
Ganelon: Eyeboooot!
Bear Soup Guy: Opportunity attack thing until next turn!
End turn!
WHOO!!
Apheori (GM): Zombies do stuff.
The one on Dawn's leg chews on it.
The other one hurls a glob of necrotic filth at the back of Rhu's head.
20 vs reflex?
What did he say it was?
Wait, he has a real character sheet now.
Apheori (GM): Eeeeee.
Ganelon: 'Bout time he got one of those.
Apheori (GM): So a glob of necrotic filth hits rhu in the back of the head for 13 necrotic damage, weakening him, whatever that means.
And Dawn probably takes some damage due to having a zombie chewing on her leg.
If something's grabbed you and you do something that would push it away, what happens?
Frezak (GM): The grab breaks.
Apheori (GM): Oh, okay.
She blasts the zombie on her leg away and it gets all dazified and hurt and stuff.
And this is why you don't chew on god fragments.
The dragon breathes on everyone.
It's like a komodo dragon.
The smell is the worst thing ever.
Ganelon: ...
Can I deactivate my nose?
Apheori (GM): I expect that's probably a minor action.
4 damage to gravy, 3 to radek, 7 to Greibel.
Ganelon: Done.
And I just ask for the sake of his immediate future.
Apheori (GM): It also takes some swipes at Gravy but misses.
Frezak (GM): Done.
Apheori (GM): Amadi viciously mocks the zombie for chewing on Dawn's leg and getting wrathed.
It takes some damage.
Frezak (GM): The dragon can stand now if it wants.
Apheori (GM): La la la.
Yeah, well, it didn't.
And you're up.
Kill it for us all so we can be done with this craziness.
Gravygravygravygravy if the rolling aint working just tell us what the rolls would be or something.
I don't know.
Ganelon: Eyebot shoots.
Apheori (GM): What? What happened?
Oh, the zombie.
Right.
It died.
Considering we've lost all but two, should we just come back later?
Ganelon: I... yeah.
Probably.
Frezak (GM): ugh
These webs.
Apheori (GM): Or maybe frezak can just kill it now.
Frezak: KILL THE DRAGON.
Frezak (GM): Okay.
Apheori (GM): Or something.
Frezak (GM): Is it still prone?
Bear Soup Guy: All but THREE
Apheori (GM): Yeah.
Frezak (GM): Okay.
I engange the Fearsome ram Strike
rolling 1D20+10+2
(
16
)
+10+2
=
28
AC
Apheori (GM): Yup.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 2D10+5+5
(
2
+
7
)
+5+5
=
19
And eyebot damage.
Apheori (GM): It tries to block it and doesn't even pull that off.
Frezak (GM): Still alive?
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Frezak (GM): I spend an AP to use Codrichun.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+13+2
(
18
)
+13+2
=
33
Vs AC
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 2D10+5+5
(
8
+
4
)
+5+5
=
22
And it has -2 to all defenses (Save ends)
Apheori (GM): Now it's dead.
Frezak (GM): AS the boiling cloud of blood and bone scours it's... corpse.
And I scoop away the last piece of reality to fully enter this plane.
Stare the dragon.
Take a breath.
The Gravedigger: GRAAAAAAVES
Greibel: I told you there was a dragon up here.
The Gravedigger: I need to dig a really big hole now.
Apheori (GM): There's still a zombie off to the side.
Frezak (GM): Rhu can solve that.
Apheori (GM): Should Rhu just smash it?
Frezak (GM): Does he still have his... Rebuke undead,
Apheori (GM): No idea.
I'ma just have him smash it and send it flying.
That only took out half its hp.
Radek should just shoot it.
RADEK: SHOOT THE ZOMBIE.
You know what, I'm done with this.
Apheori (GM): Radek shoots the zombie, hits the zombie, kills the zombie good day I need to go find my clothes.
Greibel: XD
Frezak (GM): You lost your clothes?
Apheori (GM): More like myself.
My clothes are probably exactly where they ought to be.
Frezak (GM): Your clothes lost you?
Ganelon: What is this, Polythyreme?
Frezak (GM): Maaaan
Apheori (GM): My clothes... well, I need specific ones. Winter ones.
Frezak (GM): +1 for reference, Gan.
Apheori (GM): It's all snowy and crap.
And it miht even be cold.
IN THE DAYTIME.
I don't get it.
Anyway we'll sort out when the next one is later.
You can go loot the place and stuff them.
Apheori (GM): Obligatory notes to self that today was 150121, everyone just fought and killed a pile of zombies and a dragon and there might be lootables on the dragon, and there was a room full of treasure and magical junk above. La de da.
Bear Soup Guy: Sounds like a good plan
Adios everyone!
Frezak (GM): I have a hole to dig. 

Session 44

Apheori (GM): Okay, so, uh, y'all killed a dragon and a bunch of zombies and stuff.
There's an upstairs near where Amadi is (like top of the stairs or something).
I really hate qt5 right now.
Gaurav: Why the qt5 hate?
Apheori (GM): Bloody disconnects.
Crap, I think I need to restart my computer.
Radek: Gravy, /where/ did you just come from?
The Gravedigger: Dunno.
Rhu: Didn't he come up the stairs behind you?
The Gravedigger: I think I accidentally stepped behind the wrong atom and got sidelined in spacetime.
(To The Gravedigger): Unless you have a better idea, as far as you're concerned, colours just randomly went weird and you dug through it and it went normal.
(To The Gravedigger): But feel free to ignore that if you want.
Apheori (GM): There's an issue with loot.
Frezak (GM): CLEARLY I DESERVE IT ALL
Apheori (GM): Sure, but how do you determine what loot even winds up on the party/
?
Are there tables?
Ganelon: Hoo boy.
Well there is a way to tell, yes.
Frezak (GM): Techically.
Apheori (GM): Oh, there it is.
Ganelon: I'll leave this to Frezak.
Apheori (GM): I KNOW THINGS.
Frezak (GM): THere is a table (okay, list) that tells you what stuff you should give a party over a level.
Depending on the party size and character levels.
Apheori (GM): You guys are what, 6?
Ganelon: Yes.
Frezak (GM): Sounds about right.
Apheori (GM): These parcels are... weird.
Frezak (GM): How so?
The 'art objects' ?
That's just money presented in a fancy fashion so you don't have to explain literal piles of gold.
Apheori (GM): Hmm.
Well, this is literal piles of gold. So that may or may not simplify things.
Frezak (GM): I tend to give players the gold value and tell them what the item is for flavour's sake.
Apheori (GM): At least I think it was.
Frezak (GM): Well, dragon.
Apheori (GM): Crap, I should check.
Exactly.
Frezak (GM): Are we going the Smaug route and just prying gems from its dead body?
Ganelon: I think she means there's gold not in this room, but around.
Apheori (GM): It was upstairs.
The next (top) floor is full of magical treasure, apparently.
Amadi knows.
She saw it.
And went through it.
Literally.
Apheori (GM): She drifted through it.
Ellemerr: Ghooooost mode
'Cos I'm awesome and can do stuff like that.
Also possibly dead.
Gaurav: Noclip mode
Frezak (GM): Don't give console access to crazy godshard midgets!
Apheori (GM): Oh, you're totally dead. But no more dead than you were before.
Just as dead as you've always been.
Which, granted, is pretty damn dead, at least by god standards.
Ellemerr: Yeah.
Apheori (GM): Okay, so there is gold and gems lying around on this floor.
It's all a bit sticky.
With zombie bits sprayed everywhere, and bits of dragon, and something Dawn maaaay have puked up...
The Gravedigger: Greibel.
I have a very important question for you.
Greibel: I have a lovely bunch of coconuts
Dawn walks over to the Gravedigger and headbutts him.
The Gravedigger: I'll take that as an assent of readyness.
Apheori (GM): ...should she take damage for that?
Frezak (GM): Depends on how hard she hit.
The Gravedigger: Can you smoke dragon?
Apheori (GM): Not all that.
Frezak (GM): Also, what does she deafbutt?
*headbutt
My knee?
Apheori (GM): Probably his leg.
Frezak (GM): Since she's midget, too, right.
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Frezak (GM): And Gravy is pretty huge.
Greibel shrugs
Ganelon: If it was doing damage, I'd treat it like the Wall Armor power.
1d6 and prone.
Frezak (GM): What, she falls on her ass?
Yeah.
Apheori (GM): XD
Yeah, that happens.
Dawn headbutts Gravy and then falls over.
Radek grumbles and stomps over to Rhu to administer medical attention.
Ganelon: As usual it's the most impersonal variety.
"Take this syringe. No, I'm not going to do it for you, you sissy."
Rhu looks grateful, accepts the syringe and uses it.
Ganelon: Mechanically speaking, you can have two.
Gaurav: Are we doing much more exploring before our next rest?
Ganelon: Each one pretty much means, heal your healing surge value +2 (without spending a healing surge).
Frezak (GM): Shootin' up like a bro
Gaurav: We're all in this together.
Apheori (GM): Hey, I actually know what half of these rituals DO now!
Apheori (GM) feels almost competent.
Apheori (GM): Rhu should leave a syringe in his arm and lie on the floor like he's head.
Gaurav: ... ?
Apheori (GM): ...nevermind.
Ganelon: Floor's all sticky.
Gaurav: On this floor covered in zombie bits, dragon bits and Dawn puke?
Apheori (GM): Yes.
And gold!
Some 3000gp worth, if you're willing to brave the STICKY.
Well, some of that's gems.
MEh.
Gaurav: Eh, gold, whatever. But Rhu's not getting his cl... actually, that is a lot of gold.
How long would it take to pick up 1000 GP?
Ganelon: Radek will actually try to collect those gems.
Frezak (GM): I HAVE A SHOVEL
Get yer rope'o'holdin, pardner
We got some gooooold
Ganelon: That was destroyed, remember?
Frezak (GM): Oh.
Boooo
No, I don't remember.
Gaurav: I think Rhu's fine with one syringe (14 + 2 healing); he no longer bloodied and I think he'll keep until our next long rest. Unless we anticipate more trouble before then?
Ganelon: Strangely I don't remember how I lost it.
Apheori (GM): Gaurav: A shovel, some strength and constitution checks (in your case), and a few minutes.
Ganelon: Gaurav, these syringes cost you no resources.
To get more uses of them, I need to take healing surges from /someone/.
Which usually means Gravy.
Gaurav: Oh well then. I'll use two!
Ganelon: He has surges to spare.
Apheori (GM): And there's always Amadi.
Radek collects gems?
Does he pry them out of the sticky?
Frezak (GM): DIRE GEMS
Ganelon: Yes. He's in no hurry, though.
Apheori (GM): It looks like most of the sticky was there before the fight. The dragon was messy.
Gaurav: Ew.
Bad dragon.
Ganelon: He'll try to clean them off before doing anything with them.
Apheori (GM): Radek: You wind up with a ruby and a couple saphires and a whole pile of garnets.
It's worth quite a bit.
But you suspect it'll take industrial-strength solvents to actually clean them.
Ganelon: Damn, there actually is an alchemy recipe for that, but I haven't got it.
Apheori (GM): 8000gp worth of sticky, gross, something-encrusted gems.
They might even be toxic.
Rhu searches his cloak for something that might help him pick up the gold, and finds the string of beads left for us on the driving seat of CAR instead.
Ganelon: He'll store them in a container.
Apheori (GM): You should put the gold in Amadi's pockets.
Ellemerr: And when you ask for it back later, it'll have turned into mica. All of it.
Frezak (GM): Ooooooh
Shiny.
Ellemerr: ... Except one coin. That's a crow.
A tiiiiny crow.
Made out of silver.
Ganelon: That's a great exchange rate.
Gaurav: Congratulations, your treasure is now your pet. It will provide much amusement as you live out your retirement in penury and also mica.
Apheori (GM): Did Radek... make a portable hole out of a bag of holding?
Frezak (GM): ...
Is it a living crow?
Ellemerr: Yes.
Apheori (GM): ...and then get it wrecked by codrichun shortly after?
Ganelon: I believe he may have?
Ellemerr: Sounds about right.
Apheori (GM): Niiiice.
Ellemerr: On a half-related note, in Norway the name for mica is literally "crowsilver".
Apheori (GM): Huh.
Gaurav: Oooo. Pretty!
Apheori (GM): So what are you guys doing with the gold, anything? Was Gravy trying to get Greibel to smoke the dragon?
Frezak (GM): Presumably we can take the gold.
Dawn gets up and asks to borrow a shovel.
Apheori (GM): But what do you do with it?
Frezak (GM): I give her my least favourite shovel.
Bags!
Apheori (GM): Regular bags?
How uninteresting.
Frezak (GM): Well, space future material bags.
Apheori (GM): And... practical.
Ganelon: Well it's not like I've got anything more advanced than bags, presently.
Dawn tries to use Gravy's least favourite shovel, fails miserably, and then hands it back.
Dawn: ...thanks.
I think?
Rhu: Wait, let me try!
Radek: You're all going to look like fools when we end up on a planet which doesn't accept coins as currency.
The Gravedigger: Not if we offload 'em before that.
Apheori (GM): Rhu will probably need to shovel the gold or something to actually get it off the floor. I take it that's what he wants?
Then y'all just... bag it and not put it in Amadi's pockets.
Gaurav: Yeah, Rhu was trying to borrow Gravy's least favourite shovel before Dawn handed it back.
Apheori (GM): OH. RADEK. I completely forgot to mention this at the time, partly because I didn't know it myself, but there's another planet folks been mentioning called Ord. Or something. At least you think it might be a planet. Nobody would give you a straight answer.
Ganelon: Heavens forbid he just ask Gravy for the shovel.
Er... what?
Dawn hands Rhu the shovel.
Ganelon: I might need a bit of context for that one.
Apheori (GM): Some folks. They mentioned 'Ord'.
Apheori (GM) gestures vaguely.
Rhu shovels at the gold.
Apheori (GM): That was where George was from.
Originally.
Ganelon: Oh.
Rhu:
rolling d20+3 athletics check to shovel gold
(
20
)
+3
=
23
Ganelon: So they /have/ figured out interplanetary travel here?
Frezak (GM): Gravy is very impressed.
Gaurav: What a thing to waste a nat 20 on.
Frezak (GM): OH FINE
Apheori (GM): Rhu shovels all the gold into a bag. It's like 3000gp or something.
Frezak (GM): SHOVELLING ISNT WORTHY IS IT?
I SEE
Apheori (GM): Congratulations, you're rich, now you have to lug all of that around.
Ganelon: I've heard tales of players needing a cart to transport all their wealth around.
Trust me - they don't mind.
Ellemerr: It's ridiculous.
Frezak (GM): According to the game, I can carry the weight of 3000 GP.
Apheori (GM): Gan: As far as you can tell, interplanetary travel isn't really a thing most of the time. Trips tend to be one way, but the major cities might have gates like the one Dawn used to get you to Arah...?
Ganelon: Aah.
Frezak (GM): ON top of my current gear.
Ganelon: Well good, because traveling even close to the speed of light takes bloody forever anyways.
Apheori (GM): Yes.
So the gold all works out.
Gaurav offers any of the gold to anyone who wants it.
Gaurav: Um.
Rhu: offers any of the gold to anyone who wants it.
Apheori (GM): And sorry about the Ord thing. This happens when the DM is only just figuring out the backstory herself. >.>
Radek: You wanted to butcher the dragon?
Ganelon: Radek won't take the gold if he's offered it.
Rhu keeps 500gp for himself, and puts the bag down somewhere where the floor is relatively less icky so people can help themselves.
Apheori (GM): Dawn will take two pieces and put them on her eyes if she's offered any.
They'll stick to her eyes like weird goggles.
GREEEEEEEIBEL.
You there?
Ellemerr: Any gold Amadi touches is turned to mica.
She doesn't particularly want it, though.
Bear Soup Guy: Greibel's not interested in gold.
Gaurav: So obviously the first thing she does is stuff her entire face into the bag of gold
Bear Soup Guy: He doesn't have any real use for money.
Apheori (GM): BSG: What about smoking the dragon?
Bear Soup Guy: MEDITATION is his gold!
Gaurav: Money can buy you lots of drugs or peanuts.
Bear Soup Guy: He doesn't like the idea of smoking the dragon
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Ganelon: Gold can buy magic dust.
Magic dust can enhance your bong.
Bear Soup Guy: Dragons are scary, not psychedelic
They could give you a wicked bad trip
Maybe
Gaurav: I bet they know where to find the strong stuff, though. Imagine how many drugs it'd take to have an effect on a dragon!
Bear Soup Guy: Greibel would try to outdo one
He would fail, but it would be a valiant effort
As he lay babbling incomprehensibly on the ground people would say "Nice try, man."
Apheori (GM): Oh, Greibel: Your bong is now a +2 bong. I have no idea what that means. It just is.
Bear Soup Guy: It adds to attack rolls or something, doesn't it?
Apheori (GM): I'unno!
Bear Soup Guy: Me either!
Apheori (GM) high-fives BSG.
Bear Soup Guy: Woohoo!
Ganelon: +2 to attack and damage when used as an implement.
Frezak (GM): brb
Bear Soup Guy: That implement might just be useful enough for Greibel to actually do melee combat now
Ganelon: You always could - in beast form.
Bear Soup Guy: Of course
He'll probably stay mostly ranged anyway though
There's a nice balance of ranged and melee right now in the party
STUFF
Ganelon: Let's go upstairs.
Bear Soup Guy: Excellent idea
Gaurav: Yay! A melee Greibel sounds like a wonderful thing.
Rhu follows Radek
Apheori (GM): Y'all go upstairs.
La la la.
Upstairs is full of magical treasure.
There's a magical desk and chair set.
There's a pile of cabinets full of zombie parts.
Frezak (GM): Any SHOVELS?
Apheori (GM): There's a magical pickaxe+2.
Greibel: Oooo
Apheori (GM): ...no shovels.
Ganelon: Just to be sure.
Greibel rushes to sit in the chair and recline (hopefully cutting someone off from inspecting it)
Rhu: Does a pickaxe do more damage than a maul?
Apheori (GM): Also a magic staff, greatsword, some sort of funny blue orb.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+16 Arcana (detect magic)
(
7
)
+16
=
23
Frezak (GM): Depends on the pick.
Apheori (GM): A shelf of books, of which a lot of them seem to be rituals.
Frezak (GM): THere are... light Picks, War Picks and heavy Picks
Ganelon: Oh boy.
Frezak (GM): I think a heavy pick is also 2D6
Apheori (GM): A stand covered in really tacky costume jewelry (in it radek detects a single magic necklace).
Frezak (GM): No, I lie, 1D12
Apheori (GM): So there's magic stuff all over, including the desk and chairs and weaponry, and Radek detects it and crap.
Yes.
Gaurav: Bye, dragon!
Apheori (GM): Dawn goes to the books and starts going through them, collecting all the non-ritual ones.
They seem to be a lot of tacky novellas.
Ellemerr: O_O
Amadi fights Dawn for a couple of the tacky novellas.
Radek: ...Anything you can identify as magical but useless to us, gather up in a pile somewhere.
Radek hurries over to the books to make sure he's not missing anything good.
Apheori (GM): Dawn fights back.
Ganelon: Radek is not interested in particularly steamy romance novels.
But feel free to imagine that.
Apheori (GM): Does Radek consider romance and bad comedies good?
Ganelon: No, sadly he's after arcane secrets more than Victoria's Secrets.
Bear Soup Guy: Radek secretly watches reruns of 2 And A Half Men
Apheori (GM): I picture Dawn and Amadi hissy-slapping each other and grabbing books out of each other's hands.
And they're blocking the way to the rest of the books.
Gaurav: Victoria's Arcane Secrets?
Apheori (GM): Gaurav: Yes.
Some of that, too.
Ganelon: Aren't they both extremely lightweight?
Apheori (GM): Yes.
You probably could just pick them up and move them.
Ellemerr: It shouldn't be too hard to stop us.
Apheori (GM): Even with your strength.
Ganelon: He'll just use one hand for each of them to lift them up and move them out of the way.
Frezak (GM): I just pick them up and put them down elsewhere.
They can fight in a corner.
Ellemerr: FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT
Ganelon: As he sorts through the books, he'll toss the ones he's not interested in towards them.
Ellemerr: Wheeee
Frezak (GM): Does anyone want the weapons?
I can't remember whether Avengers can use greatswords.
Ellemerr: I use longsword, not greatsword. Says my sheet.
Apheori (GM): Amadi: Tenser's Flaming Trousers bounces off your head.
Frezak (GM): Huh, they can.
Ellemerr: I don't even have Amadi in my builder. I don't even think I've got her at the right level...
Gaurav: Avengers can use military melee. But I've already got a 2d6 maul. Are great swords better?
Apheori (GM): Radek: You wind up with a pile of ritual books: Silence, Water Walk, Magic Mouth, 2 Secret Pages, Tenser's Floating Disk, Hand of Fate, Sending, Knock. Leomund's Secret Chest, Raise Dead, Forbiddance
Feel free to throw any of those you already have at them too.
Ganelon: That's a lot of books!
Hold on as I make note of all this.
Frezak (GM): Greatswords are... 1D10, but have an extra +1 to hit.
Apheori (GM): Oh, the orb is an Orb of Indisputable Gravity. I dunno what that means, but it sounded funny.
Frezak (GM): I think it's an implement that's used to stop flying creatures.
Apheori (GM): The magic necklace is whatever the hell you want it to be, within reason.
You could use it on... uh... er.
Gaurav: 1d10 + 1 < 2d6, though. But thanks for looking that up!
We could use the magic necklace to tame sphinxes.
Ganelon: He actually did not know any of those rituals.
So they can just have the spare Secret Page.
Also, my gods. Forbiddance is a L20.
Which isn't a problem, necessarily, except that it's 5000 GP and 5 surges to cast, so maybe don't ask Radek to do it unless we really, really need to be scry-proof.
Apheori (GM): Heheh.
Gaurav: How completely scry-proof can you be when there's gods in your party?
Frezak (GM): You could break it down, though.
Radek surreptitiously begins to stuff ritual books into his bag.
Gaurav: I assume it'd be like trying to hide a screaming dinosaur.
Ganelon: It's like putting up a gigantic glass wall, Gaurav. And scrying sensors, as well as anyone attempting to teleport, are birds.
They never reach the godling because there's a glass wall in the way.
Less "hiding" and more "preemptively stopping".
Apheori (GM): It blocks anything of equal or lesser level.
And the godlings are of equal or lesser level.
I think.
Gaurav: Ah, okay.
Frezak (GM): Gravy walks up behind Radek and looms helpfully.
Apheori (GM): But what he said.
Frezak (GM): I imagine radek bent over his sack.
Eyes going from side to side.
Ganelon: Nah, it's worse than that. It blocks things of equal or lesser level from getting /in/.
Frezak (GM): And then this shadow just appears from behind.
And there's Gravy.
Smiling helpfully.
Ganelon: So something better than Radek attempting to scry him will still see through it.
Radek: ...What? Did you need something?
Apheori (GM): It should be based on arcana, not base level. >.>
Radek lifts another book off the shelf.
Radek: I'm busy.
Apheori (GM): The better-than-ness.
Ohwell.
Frezak (GM): Gravy looks sad and hurt.
Ganelon: Better Arcana actually makes the warded area larger.
So being a better wizard does help, just not with that.
Apheori (GM): Did anyone take the pickaxe, staff, greatsword, or orb? Otherwise that's all on the table.
Er, desk.
Magic desk of magic items.
Bear Soup Guy: Greibel's feet are also on the desk
Frezak (GM): I think that just went to the pile.
Are they magical?
Ganelon: If they don't want it, they should be putting it on a pile, yes.
Apheori (GM): The desk is the pile. That's the magic.
Ganelon: For DISENCHANTMEEEENT
Bear Soup Guy: As magical as any pair of feet can be
Apheori (GM): Greibel
s sitting on a magic chair?
Yes he is.
Bear Soup Guy: Yes
Apheori (GM): Greibel: It's nice and comfy.
You feel like you might be able to get stuff done at this desk, but not gettign stuff done here is also great.
Greibel: Some day. Some day I'll get some stuff done...
Ellemerr: Amadi is fighting very passionately over "Fifty Shades of Blurple".
Greibel stares glassily at the walls while smoking a tobacco pipe
Bear Soup Guy: Not filled with tobacco, mind you
Dawn tears out some pages on accident trying to get it away from Amadi.
Frezak (GM): You have tobacco?
Ganelon: If I were pointlessly cruel, I'd cast Secret Page on the ending of Fifty Shades of Blurple.
It's there, you just can't read it.
Gaurav: Did Radek's arcana check tell us anything about this blue orb?
Ganelon: It is gravitous.
Apheori (GM): It's an Orb of Indisputable Gravity.
+2 or something.
Frezak (GM): To the pile!
Apheori (GM): Gan: Dude, that should have already happened.
Gaurav: Who would dispute gravity?
Apheori (GM): It still works if you tear out the pages, right?
Ganelon: It does.
Apheori (GM): So what, Dawn's holding a bunch of pages neither of them realise exist?
Uh.
Ganelon: I... guess so.
Apheori (GM): Amadi: Perception to notice Dawn pulled out a bunch of pages?
Ellemerr: I'm not sure she even cares. xD
Apheori (GM): XD
Ganelon: The DC to notice a concealed page for anyone is... the caster's Arcana result +5.
Beat that with your Perception.
Ellemerr: She's not going to read it, see. This is EXTREMELY IMPORTANT... She has to win! But she's not going to read them.
Ganelon: We don't know how good this wizard was, mind you.
Apheori (GM): Just give me a perception to notice. XD
Ellemerr: The goal MIGHT be to stop Dawn from reading them. In which case torn pages is actually a good thing.
rolling 1d20 + 7
(
3
)
+7
=
10
Ganelon: It might confer a tactical advantage to point out Dawn's damaging her own- ah.
Well it might /have/.
Apheori (GM): Okay, Amadi doesn't even notice she's fighting over less of a book now.
Ellemerr: Your point is moot, mr.
Apheori (GM): Dawn, however, does notice, and gets distracted by the wad of pages she suddenly realises she's holding.
Amadi: Strength check.
You win as long as you don't roll a 1.
...wait, no, you win even if you do.
Nevermind.
Radek stands up, grinning.
Apheori (GM): Amadi wins and gets the book!
Ellemerr: Snrrrrk
Apheori (GM): ...Dawn rolled a 1.
Ellemerr: Heh
Apheori (GM): And she was distracted on top of that.
Amadi stuffs the book in her pocket. She stuffs all the books in her pockets!
Radek: Alright, what do we have? Anything you all want to keep?
Dawn goes back to fighting Amadi for all the books.
Gaurav: Good thing they didn't go into Dawn's pockets. The rabbit would have destroyed them all! Think of the loss to civilisation from the utter eradication of Fifty Shades of Blurple.
Frezak (GM): I don't want any of this, as far as I know.
Apheori (GM): Nope, the ones Dawn gets do go in her pockets! Including the ending from that one.
Also, figure out what that necklace is.
Basically just pick something.
Ganelon: Uh...
Frezak (GM): Medallion Of Death Deferred?
Once a day, when you're dropped to 0, gain HP equal to 3+item bonus.
Ganelon: Not bad. For whom, though?
Gaurav: Girdle of Feminity/Masculinity
Frezak (GM): Anyone.
Ganelon: Also it's actually 3 x item bonus.
Frezak (GM): Don't be silly.
Girdles aren't necklaces.
Apheori (GM): Whatever it is, maximum of level 10.
Bear Soup Guy: A necklace could be a girdle for an exceptionally deformed person
Frezak (GM): Like a midget?
Apheori (GM): And if your gender is randomly swapping, you're probably deformed.
Gaurav: A Necklace of Get Off This Planet And Back Home
Bear Soup Guy: A midget with a very small torso
Even for a midget
Gaurav: Or Go Straight Back To Coffle So We Can Use The Gate
how about some sort of sense surroundings? That might have been useful to someone living in a tower in the middle of nowhere.
Ganelon: Well, no arguments about Death Deferred. That's L9 at +2.
Official stuff that'd improve Perception would be... mostly headgear.
Frezak (GM): I'd have thought that being in the middle of nowhere would reduce the need for the ability to sense your surroundings.
Gaurav: you're in a tower, so you're clearly concerned about being able to spot things at a distance or to defend yourself from something attacking below. Such a necklace would mean you didn't have to keep a continual watch, since you could just feel things approaching at a distance.
Frezak (GM): No, this is a tower because WIZARD
Apheori (GM): Death deferred it is.
Gravy: You with your passive perception notice Dawn has a bag on her head.
Do you care?
She slooks slightly headless.
Frezak (GM): Nope.
Apheori (GM): She's still trying to fight Amadi, but it's not working very well since she can't see or hear what she's doing.
Amadi: She looks REALLY headless.
Like the bag just ate her entire head and collapsed on her shoulders.
Radek prods Greibel in the shoulder.
Radek: Out of the magical chair. Unless you have a way to take it with you, I'm unraveling it.
Greibel: Someday my chair prince will come
Greibel sulks off
Ganelon: Can I identify what the chair and/or desk are supposed to do?
Apheori (GM): Arcana!
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+16
(
13
)
+16
=
29
Apheori (GM): They seemed to be designed to make an ideal workspace - comfortable, bonuses to focussing, and something about an old, failing mind.
Ganelon: Aw man.
Now I wish we could take it with us.
Apheori (GM): Amadi: Dawn finally stops fighting you with a few books left. She just falls over and stops moving for some reason.
Ganelon: It's probably related to her headlessness.
Apheori (GM): Maybe.
Amadi: HAH! Mine! ALL MINE!
Amadi strikes various victory poses.
Rhu walks over and shakes Dawn
Rhu: You okay/
Amadi: Oh, she's just a sore loser.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: Her head seems to be missing and there's a bag over where it should be.
Amadi: Because she lost.
And I didn't.
Ganelon: I have a solution to this problem.
We draw a face on the bag.
Rhu tries to touch her head through the bag.
Apheori (GM): Except the bag doesn't seem to have anything in it.
Rhu: ... um, Radek?
This seems more like a magic problem than a medic problem.
Radek is hovering over the chair, frowning.
Radek: ...What?
Rhu: Dave's lost her head.
Radek: Only just now?
Radek glances over.
Radek: Ah, you meant literally.
Amadi: Hey, why's she getting all the attention? I'm the one who won!
... Dawn, you are such a drama queen.
Rhu nods.
Rhu:
rolling d20+15 heal check on Dawn
(
15
)
+15
=
30
The Gravedigger: Is this our problem?
Apheori (GM): Rhu: She appears to be dead. Also headless.
The bag is still on where her head ought to have been, though.
Rhu: She seems to be dead, though for a godling that might not be saying much.
(From Ellemerr): Does it feel bad to me?
Radek: Hmph.
(To Ellemerr): She's dead, but she'll be fine, so naw.
(To Ellemerr): She has a magic bag on her head.
The Gravedigger: It's fix itself.
Rhu: What's going on? Where did the bag come from? Is it some kind of security system or something?
Apheori (GM): You guys are the best.
The Gravedigger: Unless, of course, she is fixed now that she has no head.
Maybe she's what she should be now.
Amadi: Ugh, you people!
Amadi drags the bag off of Dawn with an annoyed look on her face.
The Gravedigger: WHo cares!
Rhu: She's dead! Dead's not fixed. Even for a godling.
Apheori (GM): As soon as Amadi pulls the bag off, Dawn's head comes out and is perfectly normal again.
Ellemerr: (or tries to.)
Apheori (GM): And she resumed breathing.
Ellemerr: (Yay I succeeded!)
Rhu checks all her vital signs again.
Gaurav: I assume I can do that under the same heal check as before.
The Gravedigger: Oh, it's one of those.
Rhu: Is that a bag of holding or something?
Or just a bag of killing-people-by-deleting-things/
Apheori (GM): Rhu: She seems fun again. Alive and all that. Slightly unconscious.
fine*
Radek: ...In the future, do not bother me about raising either of those two from the dead until three weeks have passed since they "died".
Apheori (GM): Not fun
Gaurav: She's fairly fun.
Apheori (GM): Would raise dead even work on a god?
Frezak (GM): No.
Gaurav: I think you need sacrifices to raise god.
Ganelon: No idea, but he's not going to waste the resources on it when they can just fix themselves.
Frezak (GM): Gods aren't mortal.
Apheori (GM): Heh.
And yes, that is a bag of holding.
Ganelon: If they stay dead for almost a month, we can start worrying.
Frezak (GM): They also don't have souls.
Rhu picks up something worthless off the shelf and experimentally sticks it into the bag.
Radek turns the chair around to face the pile of magic items and begins to disenchant them.
Ganelon: That is, he sits in the chair during this.
He'll do the chair and desk if he has to, after that.
Remind me what these things are?
Apheori (GM): pickaxe +2
staff +1
greatsword +1
Orb of Indisputable Gravity +2
table and chairs+1
Ganelon: Alright.
Apheori (GM): What that means I have no idea!
Ganelon: I do.
Apheori (GM): Good.
Frezak (GM): I don't know what +1 furniture is.
At least it's not a throne, eh, Gan?
Ganelon: +1 anything is generally 360.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: The thing you put in (a rather ugly stuffed rhinoceros), goes into the bag and disappears from the outside, leaving no external impression of its bulk, and weighing nothing outside.
Ganelon: Oh goodness no, we wouldn't want that.
Apheori (GM): +1 furniture is probably a bit more.
But it's also really hard to move.
Ganelon: In that case you'll have to elaborate how much more.
Gaurav: Does the rhinoceros come back out okay?
Apheori (GM): So all you can do is... uh... break it down into 1200 total for both.
Yeah.
Rhu: Guys! I think this is a bag of holding!
Ganelon: The rest of the stuff should total 2160 (assuming 50% conversion).
Rhu puts the rhinoceros into his backpack and shows the bag to Radek
Apheori (GM): Cool.
Ganelon: So 3360 GP worth of INVALUABLE magic dust.
Apheori (GM) pleads cluelessness.
Apheori (GM): Sure, why not.
The Gravedigger: Uh-huh.
Radek: Ah, another one of these?
Apheori (GM): You know, I think the godlings technically do have souls. Or a soul, anyway. Maybe it's like one collective mind they just pass around occasionally. And use as a coaster the rest of the time.
Ganelon: Isn't it more that the gods are /just/ a soul?
Albeit an extremely powerful one?
Apheori (GM): Normally, yeah, I think. These are... weird, though.
These two. Four. Thirteen. However many there even are.
Ellemerr: Ya think?
Frezak (GM): Well, in base D&D, gods don't have souls.
Ellemerr: Just a wittle bit?
Frezak (GM): They're something else.
Apheori (GM): There's also issues with different kinds of gods. So the normal ones are probably more like base D&D, these are more like you guys, you guys are... bloody bizarre.
Ganelon: So what about the people who ascend to godhood?
Apheori (GM) cackles.
Apheori (GM): You can change the nature of a soul with MAGIC.
Bear Soup Guy: Are Demigods a thing?
Frezak (GM): They transcend the trappings of mortality.
Apheori (GM): YES.
Frezak (GM): WHich includes souls.
yes, BSG
Ganelon: Also, is Rhu giving Radek the bag of holding?
Demigods are more than just a thing.
You can choose to become one starting at L21.
Although you aren't one until L30.
Bear Soup Guy: Sexy
Apheori (GM): I think Shalias is a demigod. Not that you'd ever run into her. Or maybe you would? Her research would overlap with Radek's...
Ganelon: Research?
Apheori (GM): Well, your Shalias is a full god, but there's another one here that... uh...
Nevermind.
Research.
Ganelon: I think Radek would find the idea of a god doing research novel.
Maybe even appreciable.
Apheori (GM): Demigod. Technically.
Gaurav: Rhu is offering the bag to Radek. He feels bad about distracting Radek earlier re: Dawn, so he won't do more than stand beside him pointing enthusiastically at the bag or something.
Ganelon: Rhu's really nice sometimes, isn't he?
Radek: Thank you. I'll try not to destroy this one during experimentation.
Radek hesitates for a moment, then adds.
Radek: ...Unless I need to.
Frezak (GM): You're the only person here that isn't nice.
Apheori (GM): Man, I love Radek.
Ganelon: Which is why I'm surprised people are nice to him!
Apheori (GM): Frezak: You're putting a lot of emphasis on 'person' there, aren't you?
Frezak (GM): No?
Apheori (GM): Oh.
Ganelon: The porridge is nicer than Radek.
Apheori (GM): The godlings are nice?
Frezak (GM): Amadi is.
Ganelon: They're not nice to each other, but they're overall nicer than the grumpy old man.
Gaurav: he's grumpy, but not mean. That's all Rhu cares about.
Apheori (GM): So what now?
Y'all done with the tower?
Frezak (GM): I think so?
Was there any nomagical books of interest?
Ganelon: I'm done here.
Apheori (GM): Hard to say. Amadi and Dawn took them all.
Gaurav: have we learned anything about whoever used to live here
?
Apheori (GM): He was old, had a weird sense of humour, was decent at enchanting, and probably senile.
Gaurav: cool. yes. next side quest!
I need to leave in 40 mins or so, and should go and shower before then. be advised!
I can be back 1.5 hrs after I leave.
Apheori (GM): At which point Ellemerr, for one, should probably be asleep.
Maybe we should just sort out when the next time will be and then do more than loot.
Sorry about that.
When y'all leave, do you leave Dawn behind?
Bear Soup Guy: Loot is fun!
Gaurav: Sorry about that also. Thursdays and the weekend are literally the only days when I don't have to leave by 1:30pm MT (40 mins from now)
Ellemerr: I bring Dawn if nobody else does. Who else am I gonna fight with?
Gaurav: I think you guys should keep going! Rhu's sheet is actually readable now, so someone could play him if you need religious checks.
Frezak (GM): I thought Dave was perfectly able to walk by herself.
Apheori (GM): She's unconscious again.
Side effect of being temporarily dead.
Frezak (GM): Eh.
Gaurav: Rhu would have brought Dave along, but if Amadi gets to him first that's totally fine by him.
Apheori (GM): You could probably wake her if you actually try.
Maybe Amadi should do that.
Ganelon: Lean in close and whisper in her ear.
"Looooooseeeerrrrrr~"
Ellemerr: HEEEE
Gaurav: hahaha
Ellemerr: She's not the best at winning.
Aaaand brb
Apheori (GM): You know, I'd wondered why the restored Eapherod had later had such trouble readjusting.
But it all makes sense now.
Gaurav: Hee.
Apheori (GM): Okay, so y'all want to head out or end?
Heading out, where to?
Otherwise, when next?
TELL ALL.
Gaurav: Head out and do things! And I'll read all about them when I can!
Ganelon: I remember there being a map.
http://wiki.zaori.org/w/images/4/44/Holes_dorgin_area_map.jpg
This, right?
Apheori (GM): Yeah.
Also I did it backwards and south is up.
Frezak (GM): There was a fallen zepp?
Ganelon: Apparently.
Frezak (GM): I mean I think we planned to go there.
Gaurav: I can make any day this week if you guys want to keep going. Next week, I'm busy Monday, Tuesday and Thursday, but Wednesday, Friday or the weekend at the usual time would work.
Apheori (GM): If you wanted to get to the nearest big city, you would have taken the airship.
Except the airship was late.
Apparently due to crashing out in the woods.
Ganelon: Other days this week might be troublesome for me. I've got something scheduled tomorrow.
And maybes on Friday and Sunday.
Apheori (GM): Can everyone do next wednesday?
Ganelon: Sure.
Bear Soup Guy: Most likely
Frezak (GM): I should be able to.
Gaurav: Aye!
Ganelon: My vote is also for the downed airship, incidentally.
I might be biased, as the party's designated Tech Guy.
Bear Soup Guy: My vote is also for the downed airship
Because airship
Ganelon: But who knows, maybe it's not so damaged that it couldn't be fixed?
And if it is, we can loot the shit out of it.
Ellemerr: Back. And I can play next week as usual.
Apheori (GM): Excellent. We'll actually wait for you then.
Ellemerr: Eh, don't bother.
It usually takes a little time to get into stuff anyway, doesn't it=
?*
Apheori (GM): Some.
So airship next, then?
Note that there are a few places you could go to on the way.
Frezak (GM): Fine, I'll load the thing!
Apheori (GM): Most notably the random hut Greibel saw in the woods, and the really big tree.
Frezak (GM): The tree?
Tree.
Ganelon: It would actually be nigh impossible not to encounter one of those things on the way over. We'd have to be trying to avoid them.
Apheori (GM): There were also the hostile trees attacking that farm, but that's a little more out of the way.
Gaurav: We might want to look at the hut while we're near it, especially as it has a mysterious question mark beside it.
Ganelon: I'm predicting now - it'll be some manner of crazy person.
I'd say a hag, but somehow I have doubts.
We'll see, though. I just want that guess out here so I can say "told you so" if I'm right.
Gaurav: A hut on chicken legs
Frezak (GM): Some guy with an extensive fungus collection.
Bear Soup Guy: Can it just literally be Egon Spengler?
Gaurav: A fungus with an extensive guy collection.
Apheori (GM): Maybe.
I need to get food.
So I will be back sooooon.
Gaurav: I need to shower. So: ditto. But I'll check in again before I vanish into the lands of classrooms and evolution.
Apheori (GM): You definitely need to go to the really big tree or the hut. One of those has something really...
Apheori (GM) cackles.
Apheori (GM): Unless it was somewhere else.
Dammit, I need a usable system back. Bloody qt5.
Okay, I'm here.
Assuming y'all are too, wanna go do the hut?
Frezak (GM): I suppose so.
Ellemerr: I'm going to bed.
... In four mins.
Apheori (GM): SANE PERSON.
Apheori (GM) points accusationally.
Ellemerr: TIRED PERSON
Apheori (GM): Gan, Rob, whaddya wanna do?
Hut or end?
Bear Soup Guy: It would be neat and tidy if we end and then do the hut next time.
That said if others want to carry on I don't mind.
Frezak (GM): I actually maybe could do with going to sleep soonish
Apheori (GM): Aiight, that's sensible enough.
Next time or so, I very much do want to see Radek talk to a god. The very prospect fills me with glee.
GLEEEEE.
Okay, sleep well, sleepy people,
I love you all.
Sorry so little happened.
Apheori (GM): We will make legends later.
Gaurav: Legends! Yay!
Apheori (GM): And by 'legends' I mean 'annoying things I need to write around'.
Bear Soup Guy: Bye bye, you loonies

Session 45

Apheori (GM): Is this everyone? Shall we go?
Ganelon: You've got me.
Frezak (GM): Sure.
Gaurav: Let's go!
Apheori (GM): Everyone is magically fine and you go to the cabin in the woods.
...after the Gravedigger buries the dragon, of course.
Overall you're headed for the crashed airship, but this is on the way (mostly), so yeah.
Is Amadi still awake?
Does she still disappear when she isn't?
Or did we break her core functionality?
Apheori (GM): ...which was admittedly pretty arbitrary to begin with.
Rhu somewhat reluctantly invokes Hazz's blessings upon the dragon's soul as Gravy lowers it into the grave.
Ellemerr: I think she's awake.
I remember no reason for her not to be.
And she was glitching. I don't know how often she disappears anymore.
Gaurav: Amadi was asleep but still with us in Arah.
http://wiki.zaori.org/wiki/Holes/Session_21
Apheori (GM): That must have been when you broke her.
YOU BROKE HER.
Ellemerr: They did.
Apheori (GM): SHE WAS RUNNING SO WELL AND YOU BROKE HER. INTRODUCED ERRONEOUS VARIABLES.
Gaurav: Also, just 'cos I wanted to see where we were going: http://wiki.zaori.org/w/images/4/44/Holes_dorgin_area_map.jpg
Man, having all the session logs in one place is amazing.
Ganelon: Makes me wish every campaign I was in had these.
Frezak (GM): Shhhh.
Apheori (GM): I wish I had maps too.
Okay, so y'all get to the cabin (it takes a few hours, I suppose).
(To Greibel): FERRETS
Ellemerr: Mag could do with a log-cleaning.
Apheori (GM): It's a nice enough cabin, rustic but well-maintained, out in the middle of the woods with no apparent trails to or from, foothills towering up behind it. It has a small porch out front, with rabbits hanging from the rafters, a pair of shovels against the wall, and a rocking chair by the door.
There's nobody visible, but someone clearly lives here.
(To Greibel): Spoiler: It's ferrets.
Frezak (GM): Are they good shovels?
Gaurav: We're still level 6, right?
Apheori (GM): Decent. Some clearly have very different purposes (snow, roots, ???) and are more or less beat up as a result.
The snow one looks particularly (ab)used.
For now.
YOU'LL LEVEL SOON.
Like as soon as you rest.
If you remember.
Apheori (GM): Because I won't.
Rhu:
rolling d20+15 Perception check to look for clues in front of the cabin: footprints, some sign of which direction people head towards, dropped stuff.
(
1
)
+15
=
16
Gaurav: Hmm.
Ganelon: Hmm.
I think we need Gravy.
Apheori (GM): People probably went in the door. Or out.
Frezak (GM): You always need Gravy.
Apheori (GM): What's Gravy's max perception?
Frezak (GM): He's a rock in this ocean of chaos and uncertainty.
With or without the gravyvision power?
Apheori (GM): Which is why Amadi is sitting on him.
With.
Frezak (GM): Lots.
Apheori (GM): Exactly?
Rhu makes eye contact with Greibel, gestures towards the door, and nods confidently.
Apheori (GM): As much as I don't want this to be a DC of 40, if he can potentially handle a DC of 40... >.>
Greibel looks to the door wondering what's going on
Frezak (GM): Max modifier is 24. SO a crit would hit 44.
Apheori (GM): Oh bugger.
Frezak (GM): Gravy twiddles a horn.
Apheori (GM): FINE.
Greibel blinks at Rhu
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+14+10
(
11
)
+14+10
=
35
And whatever I get for Rhu being a very elfy elf.
Apheori (GM): So you get the impression that only one person actually lives here, no sign of visitors, apparently some pets. Possibly ferrets.
Rhu: (whispers to Greibel) It's the door. People use the door when they go in or out.
The Gravedigger: Keep an eye out for ferrets, guys.
Greibel looks back at the door
Greibel: That's a...that's a very useful observation Rhu.
Greibel pats Rhu on the back and walks in the door
Apheori (GM): Ahahahah.
Oh, man, there is a question later that Rhu will just need to ask.
I mean...
Gaurav: There is?
Apheori (GM): Are you guys just loitering, or do you approach?
Gaurav: I think Greibel has advanced to breaking and entering.
Apheori (GM): Mill around the porch? Knock? Sit in the rocking chair?
Radek: ...Wild ferrets?
Bear Soup Guy: For some reason I thought we'd already opened the door, but Greibel will totally just barge in if it's unlocked
Apheori (GM): You're outside still.
The Gravedigger: Pets, I think.
WIld ones have bigger feet.
Apheori (GM): Oh, whatever. As you discuss the ferrets, a woman comes around the corner of the cabin, having apparently been working around the back. She is old and wizened, and she smiles welcomingly.
Amadi smiles welcomingly back.
Grenity: Welcome, welcome! What can old Grenity do for you?
The Gravedigger: HELLO
I'M THE GRAVEDIGGER
DO YOU HAVE FERRETS?
Apheori (GM): Perception from all of you.
The Gravedigger:
rolling 1D20+14
(
9
)
+14
=
23
Gaurav:
rolling d20+15 perception
(
4
)
+15
=
19
Grenity looks a bit surprised at the question, then laughs.
The Gravedigger: THOSE ARE UNRELATED FACTS
Grenity: Oh, I wouldn't say I have the buggers. More they have me.
Dawn: Like cats.
Cats have your dreams.
Gaurav: Can Greibel already be inside the house at this point? Or did he not have time before this obviously evil witch showed up?
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+10 Perception
(
5
)
+10
=
15
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20+12
(
6
)
+12
=
18
Apheori (GM): Would Greibel have any reason to have actively barged in at this point?
Ganelon: Sorry, I had to explain to someone that base 10 is the one he's spent his entire life learning.
Apheori (GM): Snrk.
Gaurav: Hee.
Amadi:
rolling 1d20 + 7
(
7
)
+7
=
14
Apheori (GM): I believe I first covered bases in... 5th grade?
Bear Soup Guy: Greibel tried using the door so that Rhu would think he was giving him really good advice
Apheori (GM): Everyone but the Gravedigger and Greibel: She looks pretty normal.
Ganelon: This is programming stuff he's doing.
Apheori (GM): Gravy: She seems to be a bit older than she looks. For reasons.
Aye.
Greibel: You open the door. It's unlocked.
Inside is... house stuff. Furniture and lamps and all the usual trappings.
Ellemerr: Heh. "Pretty normal" for Amadi...
(To Amadi): Actually she's ferrets, but I assume for you that IS pretty normal. >.>
Greibel: (To Rhu) Pssst! Hey.
It's the house. People use it when they want to not be outside.
Greibel winks
Apheori (GM): ...sometimes I underestimate how weird this party can be.
Radek facepalms.
Gaurav: Hee.
Apheori (GM): ...I prepared NOTHING for this particular situation.
Which is unfortunate because this is the stuff that usually trips me up in general.
The Gravedigger: YOU WERE KIDNAPPED BY FERRETS?
The Gravedigger hefts his shovel and scrutinises the area.
Grenity goes to look at what Greibel and Rhu are doing.
Rhu will stay outside the house to keep an eye on this suspicious old lady, unless Greibel waves me in or something.
Amadi: Why are you yelling?
Is he yelling? Gravy, are you yelling?
The Gravedigger: Don't worry.
I'm a professional.
She's old.
Old people don't hear well.
Grenity: (to Gravy) Not hardly. They just run over everything.
And I hear just fine, thank you.
The Gravedigger: ARE YOU SURE?
Grenity: Well, if you keep yelling, I may not be.
The Gravedigger: OKA- okay.
Apheori (GM): What, exactly, is Greibel doing at this point?
Amadi: Well, it's nice to meet you.
Amadi nods several times to the old woman.
Grenity: And you, young lady!
The Gravedigger whispers to Amadi.
The Gravedigger: Sheeee's maaaagic.
Grenity nods several times as well.
Bear Soup Guy: Having exhausted his joke, he looks around and absentmindedly heads to the kitchen looking for tea
Rhu: Some hearing loss can be very slight. You don't even know it's there unless you have sophiscated technology. Which we do.
Amadi: ... I might have met you before. I don't remember. I'm old; it's allowed.
Grenity: Come on in, let's get you some tea. It's obviously been a long journey, and you must be exhausted.
Grenity waves everyone inside and follows Greibel.
Frezak (GM): No you're not! You're not old!
Amadi whispers back at Gravy, perplexed. "She?"
Radek: Hmph.
The Gravedigger points theatrically at the old woman.
The Gravedigger: Heeeeeer
Frezak (GM): Pretty sure Gravy doesn't know how to whisper.
Grenity: (to Amadi) Old? Older than dirt? Old as Dream, perhaps?
Frezak (GM): Are you still talking from your perch, incidentally?
Grenity switches to a completely different language which doesn't even seem to be a language at all, and then adds in a whisper, "You don't look like dirt."
Amadi whispers back,
Amadi: Oh, HER. I thought you meant THEM.
Amadi points at the old woman.
The Gravedigger: WHo them?
Amadi: Them.
Amadi points at the old lady again.
Apheori (GM): Do you all follow her inside?
The Gravedigger: Oh.
Oh.
OOOOOH.
Riiiiight.
Yes.
I knew that.
The Gravedigger: That she's a them.
I totally knew that.
Yes.
Rhu: No tea for me, thanks.
The Gravedigger: YES LET US GO INSIDE WITH THIS OLD WOMAN WHO IS NOT SEVERAL PEOPLE
The Gravedigger winks theatrically at Amadi.
Rhu follows Grenity inside.
Frezak (GM): And heads inside.
Radek grumbles.
Radek: Be quiet.
Rhu: (to Gravy) Several people?
The Gravedigger: SHHHHHHH
Ganelon: He'll also head inside.
Amadi blinks again, looking even more confused.
Amadi: People=
?*
Apheori (GM): Aiight, y'all wind up in the kitchen around now, and only barely fit.
Greibel is making tea.
Frezak (GM): That's fast.
Apheori (GM): There's a huge pot of stew on the stove, and the smell that drifts out is lovely, a savoury mix of herbs and vegetables. You didn't even realise how hungry you were.
Greibel turns around to see everybody in the room
Apheori (GM): Well, I figure in practice you were following and walking.
Greibel blinks
Frezak (GM): Gravy waves at Greibel.
Radek scowls at Greibel.
Frezak (GM): From the other side of the tiny room.
Greibel: This is cozy.
Ganelon: No, you didn't do anything wrong, don't worry.
He's just in a scowling mood.
Apheori (GM): There's also a bit of a living room a bit off the to the side, which only a low wall between it and the kitchen. If you'd like to spread out.
It has sofas.
Very, very comfy-looking sofas.
Frezak (GM): Gravy is cool with standing.
He has experience.
Ganelon: You cannot tempt me with this house!
Frezak (GM): At standing.
Grenity: You could do with soup, I expect.
Bowls are in the cupboard, go ahead and grab some. Got plenty for everyone these days.
Bear Soup Guy: inb4 they're the sofa version of the Wizard Of Oz poppies
Amadi sits on Gravy to take up less space.
The Gravedigger: Gosh, this is a lot of soup.
Were you expecting us?
(To Greibel): As soon as you actually look at her, you realise the old woman is, in fact, ferrets.
(To Greibel): Six of them.
The Gravedigger: Do you want some soup, Radek?
Greibel giggles at seemingly nothing
Radek: ...I don't eat.
The Gravedigger: You do!
Grenity: To a point. Sometimes the trees give warning, and so few visitors come by these days.
The Gravedigger: I saw you suck the juice out that deerthing.
Back in soemthingplace.
you talk to trees?
Hey, Greibel does that too!
Man.
The Gravedigger will wave a bowl in front of Amadi.
The Gravedigger: Soup?
Greibel hovers around Grenity inspecting her hair curiously
Amadi eats soup.
Grenity: It's old magic, very important out here. Got all sorts of herbs, too, if you need.
Frezak (GM): For some reason I always see Radek as being really short.
Greibel mumbles things excitedly
Frezak (GM): Crushed by time.
Grenity: (this is mostly directed at Greibel.)
Radek: I'll thank you not to disgrace my methods by placing them in the same category as eating, Gravy.
Frezak (GM): And grumpiness.
The Gravedigger: Okay.
Do you want some soup?
Radek: No.
(To Greibel): Her hair is very interesting, defying several very important laws of physics. It's a ctually a very good illusion, considering.
Ganelon: I was tempted to add "thank you".
The Gravedigger: Suuuure?
Ganelon: But then realized, that would be polite.
Radek: Completely.
The Gravedigger: Okay.
Greibel mouths "Fascinating"
The Gravedigger: Sorry about Radek, old lady, he's a grump.
Frezak (GM): HOW IS THE SOUP?
Grenity: Is that a yes?
(still to Greibel)
Ellemerr: hOW IS THE SOUP?
Apheori (GM): The soup is lovely and filling.
Greibel: ...Oh. Did you say....heeeeerrrbssss?
Apheori (GM): Perception, everyone.
The Gravedigger: This is some lovely and filling soup.
Amadi:
rolling 1d20 + 7
(
13
)
+7
=
20
Apheori (GM): And tell me if you ate soup.
The Gravedigger:
rolling 1D20+14
(
20
)
+14
=
34
Greibel:
rolling 1d20+12
(
10
)
+12
=
22
Frezak (GM): I did.
Ellemerr: did
Rhu:
rolling d20+15 perception check no soup
(
19
)
+15
=
34
Bear Soup Guy: Greibel was too busy to eat
Radek:
rolling 1d20+10 Perception
(
5
)
+10
=
15
Ganelon: Another 5.
Gaurav: Although I guess just the smell made Rhu's senses keener or something.
Grenity: Herbs, yes.
Ganelon: How consistent. And unfortunate.
Frezak (GM): If only I'd crit earlier.
Apheori (GM): Alas.
It's every five minutes you can use that?
Frezak (GM): yeah.
I think I get a +1 from Rhu, if that helps.
Apheori (GM): Gravy and Rhu: You realise there don't seem to actually be any ferrets here.
Gravy: Also, there's something vaguely magical about the woman. You see a bit of a shimmer on her. Perhaps an illution?
Amadi starts singing "Beautiful soup"
The Gravedigger: Amadi?
(To Greibel): All the ferrets are still her.
The Gravedigger: Is she/them magic?
Like a lot?
Because /there are no ferrets/
Radek: You're asking /her/?
Amadi: Sooooooooooooouuuuup of the eeeeeeeeeeeevening~!
(To Amadi): She's using magic to look like not ferrets.
Ganelon: Can, uh...
Can I check?
Apheori (GM): Since he actually mentioned, certainly.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+16 Arcana
(
9
)
+16
=
25
The Gravedigger: Also she's old.
Apheori (GM): Meanwhile Grenity shows Greibel her herbs.
The Gravedigger: Like... more old.
Apheori (GM): There are a lot of them.
Like a LOT.
Gaurav: What does an insight check actually do?
Apheori (GM): Sense motive.
Greibel: Well... I would be very grateful if you would so choose to show me to these herbs
Amadi: Buuuuuu-yessheis-uuuuuuuutifuuuuuul soooooouuuuup...
Greibel looks in Rhu's direction and taps his nose reassuringly
Apheori (GM): Greibel: Some of the herbs are hallucinogens, some seasoning, some medicinal. One looks like a very powerful antipsychotic, which could have interesting effects if tried on, say, Amadi or Dawn...
The Gravedigger: Psssssst
Raaaadek
Heeeeey
Apheori (GM): Some you have no idea what they are.
The Gravedigger: Pssssst
Apheori (GM): One looks like a magical cure-all for common ailments.
Radek: What?
Rhu:
rolling d20+8 insight against the old woman
(
20
)
+8
=
28
The Gravedigger: Can you turn off her illusion?
Apheori (GM): Radek: She's got some sort of illusion up, possibly to conceal just how old and decrepit she really is, but you can't tell for sure.
Frezak (GM): Jeebus, man.
Gaurav: Oo.
The Gravedigger: Because you see, there are no ferrets.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: She is deceiving you about something, but you get the impression she doesn't actually mean you any harm and is genuinely very happy to actually have visitors for a change.
The Gravedigger: She might be a bunch of really old ferrets.
A ferret legion.
Gaurav: Huh.
Grenity: I am NOT ferrets.
The Gravedigger: Prove it!
Where are the ferrets?
Grenity: You prove it! Prove you... aren't a squid.
Ganelon: I suppose I shall attempt it.
Amadi: I think you're really nice.
The Gravedigger: I have hands.
Grenity: They're outside, probably sleeping.
The Gravedigger: Squids don't have hands.
Or, you know, breathe air.
Grenity: I dunno, I only really see them for dinner, usually.
They can if you magic them.
The Gravedigger: AHA
Radek clears his throat and tries to ignore the fact that there is in fact a cephalopod resting upon his head.
The Gravedigger: SO YOU ARE A MAGIC FERRET!
Amadi: All of you. Very nice.
The Gravedigger: I see!
Grenity: ...no.
Radek:
rolling 1d20+16 Arcana (dispelling)
(
13
)
+16
=
29
Rhu: I don't think she means us any harm, Gravy.
Frezak (GM): I forgot you had one.
Why do you have one?
On your head, even?
Ganelon: Because it gibbers.
Greibel blinks
Frezak (GM): Riiiight
That.
Apheori (GM): Radek: Nothing really happens. The woman's hair gets a bit messed up.
Amadi: ... I want hot chocolate.
Ellemerr: And so do I.
Radek blinks in surprise.
The Gravedigger: Do you have some hot chocolate for the magical midget, old lady that isn't ferrets?
Grenity: Oh, I wish I had chocolate. Haven't even seen a chunk since I left Ord.
The Gravedigger: Of course maybe she says hot chocolate and means obsidian bees.
Frezak (GM): Do we know what Ord is?
I think someone mentioned it last time.
Amadi: ... I have some... not hot chocolate? Could you make it hot? Pleeeease?
Amadi digs out a very modern plate of chocolate.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: Do you trade for herbs, or do anything to indicate an interest?
Amadi - from her pocket. Not from her hair. Though she did consider it.
Apheori (GM): Also, I'll be right back.
Ellemerr: I might have to make hot chocolate. Maybe. We'll see.
Frezak (GM): 'have to' ?
Now that you have invoked the thought, the urge follows?
Ellemerr: Yes. >.>
Bear Soup Guy: I had a phone call
Gaurav: From last week's log: "Apheori (GM): OH. RADEK. I completely forgot to mention this at the time, partly because I didn't know it myself, but there's another planet folks been mentioning called Ord. Or something. At least you think it might be a planet. Nobody would give you a straight answer."
Ellemerr: Also: "Ellemerr (GM): Why do I always want hot chocolate when we play? >.>" From the BL log I'm working on.
Bear Soup Guy: Greibel is interested in the herbs but he's holding his tongue because the ferret lady is being bombarded with lots of questions right now
Ganelon: Right. It was a planet?
Gaurav: George is apparently also from Ord.
Radek: Ord again...
What is Ord?
Ganelon: Might as well get a new maybe-oblique answer about this.
Rhu will try one of those comfy sofas.
Grenity: It's the... other. The mirror universe where they have shiny hats and buoys and chocolate and all things good and nice.
Grenity nods and takes the plate of chocolate.
Grenity gets out a pot and stuff and starts mixing and boiling it with milk and stuff.
Amadi: Oh... I think I have Ord in my pocket!
Amadi fishes out a shiny hat. It's small and full of christmas lights.
Grenity: Nobody here knows it because they don't want to know it.
Rhu: Don't they have boys here, too?
Grenity: They don't care for the opportunity they gave up, so they pretend this is the best they have.
Except what they left was very much like Ord, back in the day. They've all just... forgot.
Radek: So why are /you/ here?
Grenity: I was here before, and I will be here 'til the world falls.
Grenity gives Rhu a weird look.
Ganelon: I'm surprised he doesn't get those more often, really.
Greibel: Unlikely
Gaurav: Weird how?
Greibel: Ferrets only have a lifespan of seven to ten years
Gaurav: Gan: yes.
Greibel looks through the herbs
Apheori (GM): Weird like she thinks you're a complete weirdo and/or idiot.
Gaurav: Oh psh.
Frezak (GM): That's mundane.
Gaurav: That's just how everybody looks at Rhu. He does not notice.
Rhu gives Greibel a weird look.
Apheori (GM): Hers stands out more because of her nose.
Grenity offers to trade and asks Greibel if he has anything for that.
Rhu:
rolling d20+15 perception check Grenity's nose
(
16
)
+15
=
31
Gaurav: I don't suppose a nose can have motive, right?
Grenity gives Amadi, Greibl, and the Gravedigger hot chocolate, keeping a mug for herself.
Apheori (GM): >.>
Amadi: Thank you! All of you, this is so nice!
Apheori (GM): Perception: It is a very large nose, and it wiggles sometimes.
Amadi drinks hot chocolate with much happiness.
Apheori (GM): Amadi The hot chocolate is a bit thick and very dark, but good.
Rhu casts admiring glances at Grenity's nose when he thinks nobody's looking.
Greibel shows Grenity the ring he took off of that skeleton in that tomb that one time when we found Mr. Mousey
Apheori (GM): Rhu: Nature.
Rhu:
rolling d20+10 nature check
(
19
)
+10
=
29
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Bear Soup Guy: Oh and it wasn't a tomb and it was actually when we found Dave too, now that I think about it
Grenity offers some of her best hallucinogens and an antipsychotic in exchange.
Greibel: Ahhhhh, yeeeesssss...
Grenity puts a little of the antipsychotic in her chocolate.
Greibel: Excellent. This will do nicely.
Greibel makes the trade
Grenity takes the ring and nods at it admiringly.
Grenity: So many stories. So much history, lost to the worlds.
Gaurav: (to Greibel) If you need more herbs, I'd be happy to trade her a partially digested light fixture.
Greibel: Yeah, and it's not even +1 or anything.
Gaurav: Sorry, that was IC.
Greibel: Well, what are you waiting for?
Greibel gestures for Rhu to do that
Rhu offers Grenity a half digested light fixture.
Grenity looks it over, then looks quite surprised.
Grenity: I... do not recognise this. Where did you get it?
Apheori (GM): Entirely out of character, I think I just realised who Grenity is and I really hope I'm wrong.
Radek: Are you referring to the technology?
Ganelon: Doubtful, but it's worth asking.
Grenity: The history. The stories. They're not...
Rhu: I also have a bunch of mushrooms from that stoned, jailed philosopher back in Coffle, if any of you want a bit. That was powerful stuff.
Grenity stops and actually gives you all a proper look.
Grenity: You're it. You're the answer.
Amadi hums a little more of the soup-song.
Rhu: We found it in a pile of splatter in Sarathi.
Apheori (GM): I had cookies for lunch.
The Gravedigger: That sort of thing happens a lot.
Apheori (GM): She startles at the name as though she'd been struck.
Gaurav: You should get a proper lunch later.
Apheori (GM): Perception, everyone (and use your thingy, Gravy).
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+10
(
16
)
+10
=
26
Greibel:
rolling 1d20+12
(
16
)
+12
=
28
Rhu:
rolling d20+15 perception
(
12
)
+15
=
27
Amadi:
rolling 1d20 + 7
(
14
)
+7
=
21
Ganelon: Hey, it's not 5!
Dawn: Ferrets.
The Gravedigger:
rolling 1D20+24
(
13
)
+24
=
37
Apheori (GM): So close.
(To Amadi): The ferrets almost just fell over.
(To Greibel): The ferrets almost just fell over.
Gaurav: Everybody gets a +1 from Rhu.
Apheori (GM): Gravy: She looked quite wobbly. As though about to fall apart.
Amadi: ... Are you lot okay?
Amadi looks worryingly at Grenity.
Grenity: I... yes.
The Gravedigger: No-one poke the old lady.
Grenity: I'm sorry, I'm old and some names... some names you just do not expect to hear again.
The Gravedigger: She may explode.
Grenity: I'm fine.
Radek: So you recognize Sarathi.
Grenity: It's... I... don't know.
Yes.
Radek: Considering how it's likely nothing more than scattered fragments of reality by now...
Grenity looks genuinely confused.
Radek: I demand an explanation.
Grenity: It's not one. It's like...
A hole. When you take a stack of papers and punch a hole through all of them. Hundreds at once. Bits get torn of and scattered down the line, one way as the punch goes through, another back. Sometimes the hole isn't even a hole, just a rip, but it gets stuck to the others.
Grenity is visibly shaking now.
Grenity: We almost tried it. Once.
And then... it was destroyed. So destroyed it didn't even have a name anymore, and we were destroyed with it, and now we're... we're...
Greibel: The Ferret Lady?
Greibel sips his tea non-chalantly
Grenity is too shaken up at this point to even respond.
Amadi narrows her eyes at Grenity.
Amadi: Did you... know me...? When I was someone else?
Gaurav: Look at all of us sitting around quietly learning things and having a polite conversation with a strange old lady. Does that mean it's time to ruin everything by invoking Hazz?
Amadi: ... Did I ever know you?
Grenity: (whispering) You were always you. You still are.
Radek: You don't need to explain, I've witnessed the phenomenon personally.
Amadi shakes her head violently.
Grenity: You knew us all, dear dreamer. You were the one who saved us.
Amadi: NOT!
Not her!
Grenity calms, and smiles at Amadi.
Grenity: You're you.
You and nobody else.
Dawn: All of us?
Amadi keeps shaking her head and hides a little behind Gravy (without climbing off him).
Amadi: Don't wanna.
The Gravedigger: I'd appreciate it if you'd stop upsetting my hat.
Dawn: It's all right. She means we're us. We're always ourselves no matter who we are.
I don't even know who I am.
Dawn laughs suddenly.
Greibel: WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO ARE YOU
Amadi: You're not Dave.
Greibel: WHO WHO
Amadi: I'm not Amadi.
Greibel: WHO WHO
Dawn: I'm not, no. And you're not. It's very interesting.
Gaurav: Greibel turns into an owl and starts hooting at everybody.
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Grenity: But all of you are. You always were, waiting.
Apheori (GM): A swarm of owls.
On every surface.
Gaurav: I wonder how many distinct beings were in that conversation just now.
Apheori (GM): Approximately nine.
Wait, no, 11.
Gaurav: The answer is certainly not integral and might be imaginary.
+ the upcoming owl swarm
Apheori (GM): Actually I don't even know.
Ellemerr: *giggles*
Amadi giggles hysterically for a little bit and then starts brading Gravy's hair.
Apheori (GM): Rhu was on the sofas, right?
Gaurav: Still is! He's really comfy now.
Dawn guides Grenity over to the other sofa and lies her down.
Apheori (GM): Does Rhu still have his mask of furry truesight?
Gaurav: ...
Apheori (GM): ...nevermind.
Radek tries to remain composed. To find the eye in the storm of owls.
Apheori (GM): Wait, did Greibel actually go owls?
Bear Soup Guy: Nah
Ganelon: If he didn't... just ignore that.
Apheori (GM): Ah, foo.
Gaurav: Okay, I think I just lost track of the mask when Rhu regained his sight.
Is the mask really light? He might have just left it on.
Apheori (GM): It made everything look insanely hairy.
Gaurav: Oh. Then he'd've put it away with his things.
So it's in his backpack now.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Gravy: You feel a bit tired, perhaps from the soup. It was very filling and relaxing.
Grenity is lying on the sofa with Dawn, who's stroking her... hair. They're talking in hushed voices.
(To Amadi): Actually she's stroking ferrets.
(To Greibel): Actually she's stroking ferrets.
The Gravedigger sits into the nearest sofa.
The Gravedigger: WHAT A DAY, EH?
(From Bear Soup Guy): Of course!
Amadi falls off Gravy.
Frezak (GM): Gravy assumes she will be unharmed.
Apheori (GM): Amadi lands on the sofa next to him, almost as though it were intentional, but only almost: she's upside down.
Gaurav gets up off the sofa and walks around the living room, looking at anything on the walls.
Gaurav: urk sorry that was IC
Grenity: Getting too old for this.
Dawn: Oh, don't worry. It's only as old as the worlds.
Radek remains seated in the kitchen.
Apheori (GM): The walls have various paintings and drawing, including a whole lot of what look like they might be family.
They're all very old, and elves.
I guess Grenity is an elf too.
Though you wouldn't have noticed from looking at her.
Gaurav: That's unusual here, right? I think we've mostly seen humans so far.
Apheori (GM): Aye.
Mostly.
Ganelon: Ah, I know what Radek will do.
He'll mess with that contraption.
The one which uses rocks.
Gaurav: Is there a door from the living room to outside the house, say into the back yard?
Apheori (GM): The front door was probably by the living room, the back by the kitchen.
Gan: Describe what you do, what you want to try, or what you need to know.
Ganelon: I... hrm.
Rhu starts getting bored, and wanders outside through the front door to look around the house.
Rhu:
rolling d20+15 perception check on the house: how old is it, is it well-made, etc.
(
3
)
+15
=
18
Apheori (GM): Even if it's just poking it or sticking random things together or zapping it with small lightning bolts.
Does Rhu know anything about construction, especially oldfangled?
Gaurav: Nope!
But he's bored.
So he's just poking around.
The Gravedigger hums.
Apheori (GM): It doesn't look all that old, fairly well-made, and everything seems hand-made. Slightly uneven, but only very slightly. Every nail slightly different, that sort of thing.
Maaan, those cookies.
I could just take a nap.
Gan: You can also just give me random rolls and say he's literally just trying random things.
But it'll be easier for me if you actually specify what the random things are, or ask questions about specific whatevers. >.>
Frezak (GM): Smear it with various kitchen products.
Ganelon: Sure.
We can start with magical scrutiny.
Apheori (GM): Arcana.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+16
(
13
)
+16
=
29
Gaurav: Is there any sort of basement in this house?
Apheori (GM): There are two levels to its magic. One is fairly normal, a bit like a trick lock, but it's too broken to see how it's actually supposed to go together. And under that, is another layer - a layer unlike any magic you've ever seen as magic, exactly, but in general it feels just like the holes.
The stones definitely tied to the lock level.
Gaurav: Not that you can tell.
Other rooms are just bedrooms and storage and a remarkably modern-looking bathroom that doesn't even look used.
Ganelon: Aah, so it is broken.
I recall that it's actually missing a piece. The uh... top?
Apheori (GM): Aye.
Ganelon: Alright.
Rhu walks around the house, looking out at the landscape around the house and vaguely looking for entrances and exits from the house.
Ganelon: I will attempt to jury-rig a functioning top out of... anything at all.
If Radek gets the notion that he can make one out of expertly carved potatoes, he goes for it.
Apheori (GM): d20.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
19
)
=
19
Apheori (GM): There's some foil on the counter, which makes the needed shape reasonably well.
Arcana?
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+16
(
2
)
+16
=
18
Aaaaargh
Apheori (GM): He gets it on, and the magic takes it, but it's not going to stay on if he moves it or anything.
Even so, the device seems mostly fixed now, at least at the top level.
Fortunately Radek's arcana is high enough that the only way to outright fail is to roll a 1. >.>
...so far.
Gaurav: What's Greibel doing?
Ganelon: Haha!
I love my rampant overspecialization.
Bear Soup Guy: Greibel's sampling his newly acquired herbs, of course
Gaurav: Hee. Nice.
Amadi stands on her head for a bit.
Radek: Aha!
Ganelon: Did we actually get the old lady's name?
Gaurav: I don't think so. Greibel referred to her as Ferret Lady earlier.
Radek: Houseowner!
I require your attention for a moment.
Apheori (GM): Grenity.
She introduced herself at the start.
Ganelon: Oh.
Apheori (GM): The Gravedigger introduced himself.
Nobody else noticed.
Ganelon: Well whatever, Radek can just be rude.
Grenity: (from the sofa) Hnnnnh?
Apheori (GM): Greibel: These are some really good hallucinogens and make Grenity almost not look like ferrets.
In fact everyone might be bees.
Radek: I have a device. Perhaps you will recognize it.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: Also, you can see Midnight and it's watching you, but you doubt it can actually reach you from here.
The woman starts to get up, but then Dawn motions for her to stay put ("No, no, I got this") and comes over instead.
Radek frowns at Dawn.
Radek: You've already seen this.
Dawn: You fixed it?
Frezak (GM): Gravy will stand around and look helpful without doing anything.
Radek: Temporarily.
The Gravedigger: Hmmm.
Frezak (GM): I WILL ROLL ARCANA
Dawn: Have you turned it on?
The Gravedigger:
rolling 1D20+4
(
6
)
+4
=
10
Apheori (GM): Wait, does dawn have arcana too?
Frezak (GM): That looks like foil.
Everyone HAS arcana.
Apheori (GM): Gravy: It looks like foil.
And I mean as something she's trained in.
Oh gods she does.
Ganelon: She did make a floating disk.
Dawn gives the thing a look over.
Dawn: You need to put in a proper combination to turn it on, but then... I think the stones are just building blocks. Use them to represent the missing reality, and you can reshape...stuff?
The Gravedigger: Hmmm.
Ganelon: Hmmm is right.
Dawn:
rolling 1d20 + 10
(
2
)
+10
=
12
Hmm.
Ganelon: Another 2!
This thing defies scrutiny.
Apheori (GM): I like my physical dice better.
Ellemerr: Allow me to try.
rolling 1d20 + 10
(
13
)
+10
=
23
Apheori (GM): She got a 29 on her first roll with those.
Amadi looks at the thingy.
Apheori (GM): Much better. sort of.
Amadi: Do you actually go over to them, or do it across the room?
Amadi walks over on her hands. Then takes the thing from them and fiddles with it. Upside down.
The Gravedigger: Hmmm.
Radek: Don't move it-!
Apheori (GM): Amadi: You cause the foil to fall off, but see a way to fix the foil so it'll actually stay on and keep working in doing so.
Ganelon: NNOOOO MY PRIDE
Apheori (GM): XD
Greibel hasn't been paying proper attention to all the conversation and is laughing so hard at everyone right now
Amadi looks like a guilty child who did something she shouldn't and quickly fixes the thing and puts it back, looking anxiously at Radek.
Apheori (GM): Does Radek have the stones?
Amadi falls off her hands/head and ends up on her back.
Amadi: Ow.
Ganelon: Yeah, I think so.
We kept them all in the same box.
Apheori (GM): Excellent.
Ganelon: Or should have.
Dawn fiddles with the stones.
Dawn:
rolling 1d20 +10
(
17
)
+10
=
27
Radek: (To Amadi, begrudgingly) ...Thank you.
Apheori (GM): How many slots did I say the thing had? Seven?
Ganelon: Seven, ye.
Yes*
Gaurav: "The box contains a circular contraption with spaces for seven stones, three more of the stones themselves, and a few chunks of something that looks like it shattered."
Apheori (GM): Yeah.
Dawn selects seven stones and pushes them across the counter to Radek.
Dawn: These.
Apheori (GM): If you use them or whatever, I don't care about actual order. Just roll or something. >.>
Radek raises an eyebrow at Dawn, but takes the stones and inserts them in an arbitrary order.
Ganelon: If it matters at all, let's say one he is personally biased towards.
rolling 1d20
(
7
)
=
7
And if simply putting them in does nothing, he turns it on.
Apheori (GM): Arcana?
Putting them in doesn't explicitly do anything, but...
Ganelon: Oh.
Apheori (GM): ARCANA.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+16 ARCANAAAAA
(
1
)
+16
=
17
NO
Apheori (GM): ...it seems to still be broken.
The Gravedigger:
rolling 1D20+4
(
16
)
+4
=
20
Frezak (GM): Because Gravy sees that Radek is sad.
Apheori (GM): Gravy: It's not broken. You just need to get one of them entirely seated.
Jiggle it or something.
The Gravedigger jiggles the device.
Ganelon: Radek /is/ pretty sad right now.
Apheori (GM): The not seated one falls out.
Ganelon: He's getting upstaged in his own field.
By the /midgets/.
Apheori (GM): >.<
Frezak (GM): I'll put the unseated stone in properly.
Apheori (GM): Well, to be fair, before they were split, they were an engineer.
Ganelon: I did not know that!
Apheori (GM): ...they were also a god of madness.
>.>
Radek: Oh.
Radek mumbles absently as he replaces the unseated stone.
Apheori (GM): Frezak: When you do, it turns on, humming very faintly, and emitting light in a way that totally makes sense.
Well, whichever of you does it.
Ganelon: Sorry, I didn't see him actually mention operating it.
Frezak (GM): Gravy will hand the device back to teh Radek.
And beam.
Apheori (GM): Heh.
Dawn:
rolling 1d20 + 10
(
4
)
+10
=
14
Apheori (GM): Amadi: You should roll too.
Amadi:
rolling 1d20 + 10
(
9
)
+10
=
19
Radek: Well, that's... progress.
Apheori (GM): Amadi: It has something in it. A message.
Dawn: You should be able to turn it, now. Change the stones.
Whatever that means.
Radek squints at the thing with one eye.
Amadi leans towards the device and whispers,
Amadi: Tell me.
Apheori (GM): Amadi: d20
Amadi:
rolling 1d20
(
4
)
=
4
Ellemerr: Uh oh >.>
Apheori (GM): Do it again. >.>
Ellemerr:
rolling 1d20
(
4
)
=
4
:D
Apheori (GM): Well, huh.
Ganelon: Sometimes you just can't escape it, DM.
Apheori (GM): It doesn't tell you.
But something is watching.
Something huge and sizeless. Everywhere. Watching. Focussed.
Amadi sticks out her tongue at it, offended.
Apheori (GM): On you.
Ganelon: Also sometimes this happens:
http://imgur.com/flAgDgX
Apheori (GM): o.O
Ganelon: Actual character of mine, by the way.
Gaurav: Wow!
Frezak (GM) rolls eyes
Ganelon: Frezak hates her because she's a literal mouse.
And also a Pathfinder character.
Don't mind him.
Apheori (GM): >.<
Well, MY pathfinder character wears a badger on his head.
Ellemerr: Is it too late to make hot chocolate? Would you people be upset if I went and did that?
I wouldn't be -completely- gone, but I would be less present. >.>
Apheori (GM): First say if Amadi noticed the huge sizeless thing everywhere watching her.
Ganelon: Now I believe the purpose of this puzzle, as Dawn reminded us (but I kept notes, we already sorta knew this), is to reorder the stones placed in it already.
Apheori (GM): Scrutinising her.
Gaurav: I need to leave in the next half hour. Work work work.
Apheori (GM): Focussing on her, and her alone, from infinite angles.
Ganelon: So...
Ellemerr: She totally stuck out her tongue at it.
Offended.
Gaurav: But Rhu can stay outside the house as long as needed, and I can be back an hour after I leave if we're still going then.
Apheori (GM): Oh, I thought that was at the box.
Okay.
Ellemerr: It was both.
Apheori (GM): It doesn't do anything to that.
Rhu wasn't doing anything already, so...
What'll it be?
Can everyone do the same time next week?
Ganelon: Radek swaps the positions of the stones representing... let's say "fire" and "bird".
Totally.
Apheori (GM): Radek: Greibel looks like he's on fire.
Gaurav: Same time next week works for me!
Ganelon: ...Someone turn the stove on and see if doves come out.
Greibel waves casually at Radek
Greibel with one leg bent over the other
Bear Soup Guy: Same time next week is probably good for me
Radek strokes his beard and gives Greibel a good, fascinated staring.
Radek: Do any of you see that?
Apheori (GM): To Amadi, Greibel usually looks like he's on fire.
But nobody else did.
Amadi: I see everything.
Dawn: Not you. You don't see you.
Amadi: I could if I wanted to!
Dawn: But you don't.
Amadi: Not even a bit.
Apheori (GM): Radek: Arcana.
Gravy: Perception.
Radek:
rolling 1d20+16
(
6
)
+16
=
22
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+14
(
17
)
+14
=
31
Ganelon: Geez, apparently I need to spend all this dust on getting some runic armor.
Get another +2 to Arcana.
Apheori (GM): Clearly.
Ganelon: After that I might legitimately have /run out/ of ways to make it higher.
Apheori (GM): Radek: Messing with the order can change what the object reveals. But changing the stones as well, using new ones, might even change reality.
Ellemerr: You need a double-roll.
Ganelon: I do.
Apheori (GM): Gravy: You notice that the woman on the sofa, who has now dozed off, is ferrets.
Six of them.
The Gravedigger: I KNEW IT
Greibel starts laughing uncontrollably again
Greibel: YOU know what's up man!
The Gravedigger: I am upset that you'd lie about it!
Its really rude!
Grenity snores in tandem.
Radek: Fascinating.
Radek returns the stones to their original positions.
Ganelon: I'll experiment more with this next time, I suppose.
Apheori (GM): Greibel looks like bees, now.
Bear Soup Guy: BEES ON FIRE?!
Apheori (GM): ALWAYS.
Gaurav: o.0
Bear Soup Guy: OH GOD I AM TERRIFYING
Gaurav: Is the Greibel-fire giving off any smoke?
Apheori (GM): Nope.
It's like HOLY FIRE.
Except druggy.
Instead of holy.
You guys want to do anything else here, wake the woman/ferrets, steal some soup for the road, try reshaping all of reality in a go?
Or should we just have you move out so we can start the next with a new place?
Rhu returns to the rest of the party after his walk.
Frezak (GM): If she's really asleep...
I want to write I AM FERRETS on her house.
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Ganelon: ...Separate a ferret from the rest.
Apheori (GM): Inside or outside?
Ganelon: There's your evil notion for the week.
Frezak (GM): Outside.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Does anyone separate a ferret?
Of those who see the ferrets.
Ellemerr: Not me. In fact, I will glare viciously at anyone attempting such a thing.
Ganelon: Radek won't.
He's got his restored puzzle (now with tinfoil)
Gaurav: Rhu sees nothing.
Frezak (GM): Gravy is performing graffiti.
Actually.
I want to...
Dig the words into the ground.
And I want the ground to remember.
That this lady is ferrets.
Gaurav: Ha!
Frezak (GM): And was untrue.
I want to bury this truth right beneath the sruface.
*surface.
Gaurav: If you do that, I'm going to ask that this be added to the map.
Frezak (GM): I want it to be there, in every step taken.
Apheori (GM): Roll arcana.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+4
(
9
)
+4
=
13
BLuh
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Just checking.
You still put the words down and they're there, dug into the ground.
Anyone flying overhead will surely see.
Ellemerr: I accidentally had some curry in my cocoa. It's fine, though. Could need some cream, but I'm out.
Apheori (GM): o.O
The Gravedigger: Hrmph.
Frezak (GM): How did you do that?
Ellemerr: I thought it was cinnamon.
Frezak (GM): Right.
Apheori (GM): >.<
Ellemerr: I do that frequently. Never before with the cocoa, though.
Apheori (GM): Okay, Gravy does that, and you all leave sleeping ferrets lying and head out?
Ellemerr: I pat the ferrets and leave them some extra chocolate.
Gaurav: Are they just a pile of ferrets snuggling against each other in a vaguely human-shaped lump to anyone who can see?
Frezak (GM): Gravy is grumpy.
Apheori (GM): You still see old lady.
Ganelon: He can grump next to Radek.
Frezak (GM): Do they have a sort of stick framework to stand on?
Apheori (GM): It was apparently magic.
Ganelon: Radek won't support him but he won't push him away either.
Gaurav: Aw. Well. Rhu waves vaguely at her as we leave.
Frezak (GM): Floating ferrets?
Apheori (GM): In a dress.
Frezak (GM): Sure.
Apheori (GM): Magic.
Part of the magic was apparently just that nobody in their right mind would even WANT to see it.
Gaurav: A somebody-else's-ferret field?
Frezak (GM): I don't know of anybody that would fit that description.
Ellemerr: I don't think anyone in the party is in their right mind.
Frezak (GM): Or we are.
Apheori (GM): Well, there is that.
But anyhoo.
More will happen later.
NEXT WEEEEEEEEK.
Apheori (GM) runs away.
Bear Soup Guy: BYE
Gaurav: Bye everybody!
Ellemerr: Sweet nightmares. And hot chocolate.
Apheori (GM): Dream well.

Session 46

Apheori (GM): Is Gan here? I don't see him.
And gods dammit this spacebar sucks.
Guys? Hello?
Is this thing on?
IS IT?
Apheori (GM): DOES IT BLEND?
Gaurav: It is!
It does not.
Apheori (GM): Is Gan dead?
Frezak (GM): I think he was eaten by fruit.
Apheori (GM): Did someone kill him in his sleep?
Frezak (GM): Since fruit are people.
Apheori (GM): For being too much of a robot?
Gods dammit firefox is a moron.
It scales all the wrong things, and everything differently.
Because apparently adding 30px of padding is TOTALLY USEFUL when all I really want is to be able to read the damn text.
Gaurav: Is Opera any better? Either Opera.
Apheori (GM): Opera doesn't have any support at all, so I just upped the default zoom.
...which actually is a better experience than this.
Good gods.
Okay, everyone is here, my spacebar is shot, my screen is horrific, and I need to shoot someone.
AND WHY IS THE TEXT GREY?!
Wait, that's my eyes.
Gaurav: o.0
Apheori (GM): Moral of the story, don't get a giant-arse monitor, get completely drunk, and wreck your keyboard.
Ganelon: If you're certain that you're in a state to do this, I'm here.
I won't judge you for calling a rain check on this, though.
Apheori (GM): Oh?
Because I'm totally not prepared and would love an excuse to put it off again. Except I'm not even sure what the excuse would be this time.
Frezak (GM): That means he likes you.
Excuse : Simba.
Ganelon: "I'm not prepared"- no it doesn't, Frezak.
Frezak (GM): You tease.
Apheori (GM): ...I'm never prepared.
Ganelon: "I'm not prepared" is an entirely valid excuse.
Apheori (GM): Maybe for other people. >.<
Gaurav: As is "I just don't want to right now"
Apheori (GM): Pfft.
Bear Soup Guy: YOU ARE NOT PREPARED!
Bear Soup Guy points the thunder stick
Apheori (GM): Everyone's here.
Ellemerr: Blame your keyboard? :P
Apheori (GM): We oughtn't waste this.
Apheori (GM) hisses at it.
Frezak (GM): Don't get spittle in it!
Apheori (GM): Um.
Okay.
You all were leaving the ferret lady on the way to check out that really big tree and crap.
I forgot what time it is.
Ellemerr: There is time? O_o
Apheori (GM): Yes.
So you've been up like 60 hours at least, but you're elves so nobody cares.
Dorgin is basically on the way to the tree. Do you stop and rest?
Frezak (GM): The Hour Of The Slavering Dark
Gaurav: If by rest you mean go back to the pub with the annoying singer that Gravy buried and get roaring drunk/fall into the eldritch basement, then *yes*.
Apheori (GM): Or just occupy the guardhouse for the night again.
Ganelon: Everyone thinks we're guards anyways.
Apheori (GM): Point is YOU CAN REST IF YOU WANT TO, although this being 4e there's less reason to do so.
Exactly!
Ganelon: The /fool/s.
...Bah, stupid fingers.
Apheori (GM): You're not covered in chrome anymore. It's an understandable mistake.
And Gravy probably looks like an orcan to those who don't know what orcans look like.
Perfectly normal.
Ganelon: Wouldn't Radek look far too old for active duty?
Apheori (GM): Not for a lab guy.
Or something.
Too cranky to let the clueless new folks do the very important work...
Actually they'd have no idea and probably just go along with whatever so long as folks acted important enough. >.>
Ganelon: Man, I wish more civilians were like that in some of these other games.
Nobody takes orders from my gnoll unless they're terrified.
Apheori (GM): So terrify them.
Also, rest or not?
Ganelon: This also has a high probability of making them run rather than obey.
And also of getting me attacked.
Apheori (GM): Wrong planet, clearly.
Gaurav: Eh, why not. Let's rest in the guardhouse.
Ganelon: Sure.
Gaurav: If we were to rest, would we dream anything special?
Apheori (GM): Yes, but I can't tell you what because I didn't write it.
I'll... uh... do that now, or something. >.<
Important question - what's Radek doing tonight?
Ganelon: Something fairly tame this time, I think. Putting his research notes to paper.
Actual paper, no less.
Frezak (GM): We have PAPER?
Apheori (GM): Radek does.
The rest of you plebes?
Who knows.
Ganelon: Well if he doesn't, we're in a town.
Frezak (GM): What's wrong with your science future space tablet device?
Ganelon: Its battery time, mostly.
Frezak (GM): And you're telling me YOU can't recharge it?
Apheori (GM): Not paranoia about paper being more reliable?
Frezak (GM): We're all carrying energy weapons!
That only one of us use!
Apheori (GM): Well, foo. Nevermind.
Frezak (GM): And you're a scienceman!
Make a damn photovoltaic panel.
With beard wisps and bark.
Ganelon: You young'uns just can't appreciate a good blueprint.
Frezak (GM): Gravy's not young.
He's as old as graves.
Ellemerr: Amadi is very young.
She has a few blueprints in her pocket.
Ganelon: Oh, fine.
Apheori (GM): I suck at writing dreams.
Ganelon: If you're going to be so insistent that he act rationally about this, he uses the bloody tablet.
Apheori (GM): PFFT.
Frezak (GM): No!
Be archaic!
Go use your sticks!
Ganelon: Too late.
He's using the tablet now.
Frezak (GM): I have made up a grand total of two dreams.
And one of them didn't leave the involvees time to think.
Yay cheating
Ganelon: I've written a dream once before.
I think Ellemerr criticized it for being too distinct and/or sensory.
Which is pretty fair, I'll admit.
Frezak (GM): She's a real critic.
Ellemerr: I've written... some... dreams... yeah. *shifty eyes*
Frezak (GM): Addict!
Ganelon: As someone who doesn't remember his own dreams for even a second after waking up, it's understandable I wouldn't know quite what they're like.
Ellemerr: Oh, my dreams are nothing like the dreams I write.
... Except maybe that one dream Bartle had about running across a book, maybe.
Frezak (GM): Heeeeee
Apheori (GM): What the hell do avengers actually do in terms of magic?
Frezak (GM): They smite?
And hunt down.
Ganelon: They channel divine power.
Frezak (GM): Mostly smiting.
Ganelon: It's all about finding the enemies of their god and- look, you're basically batman mixed with an inquisitor.
Frezak (GM): HOAR
Gaurav: We can attack with radiant bolts of light type things, and we can swing mauls at people that uses WIS instead of STR and that are occasionally sparkly. I think?
Ganelon: Don't think too hard about the WIS instead of STR thing, that's just 4E's philosophy.
Gaurav: I see it as an attack that's sneaky and ... wise rather than direct and strong.
Ganelon: You're swinging a maul.
There is nothing sneaky about a maul.
Gaurav: This is true.
Apheori (GM): It's smiting attacks.
Thatś all it is.
So Radek's using his tablet? >.>
Ganelon: Yes.
Apheori (GM): Hmm.
Ganelon: He is scrivening (is this really not a word, Firefox?)
Frezak (GM): YES IT IS
Fuck you firefox.
Ganelon: Thought as much.
Apheori (GM): AT LEAST YOU GET A SPELLCHECKER.
Frezak (GM): And brb
Apheori (GM): ALL OF MINE ARE BROKEN!
...aside from firefox, apparently. Screw firefox.
Ellemer: HALP.
Ellemerr: *flails*
Apheori (GM): ...yes.
Can you write a dream for me? >.>
Ellemerr: ... You know I usually spend a lot of time for that, right?
Who for? >.>
Apheori (GM): Uh... Greibel?
Please?
Mine are all terrible. You have a low bar. >.>
(From Ellemerr): I can't just make random dreams at the spot like that; I'm sorry. I need -some- sort of anchor (like the duck and stuff last time), theme, mood... And time is very useful, too!
(To Ellemerr): Bring back the chicken, but now a little worse for wear, and general theme of panic, loss, and/or horrible futures? But also hope.
(To Ellemerr): But if not, no worries. I can probably fudge SOMETHING.
Apheori (GM): Also, guys, really sorry about this. >.<
(From Ellemerr): ... Ugh, no. I've got nothing. Bleh. >.<
(To Ellemerr): No worries, and thanks for trying.
(To Ellemerr): He'll just get something about a gradeschool teacher or something.
Gaurav: No worries! I am excited for the visions.
Apheori (GM): I need a new keyboard.
0bgggvvvvmnvb
Okay. new dusty keybaord.
Ellemerr: Heh...
Apheori (GM): Very dusty.
Argh, my fingers have no idea where the keys are. >.<
(From Ellemerr): Are you absolutely sure you want to keep going? Nobody will blame you if you call it a day, and yes, it is a shame to miss the opportunity, but as an RPer I like says, "sometimes potato happens".
Apheori (GM): I'm sorry.
I HAVE DREAMS.
ARE WE TOO LATE TO PLAY?
Gaurav: I'm still here for another 1hr 40mins!
Ellemerr: ^_^; Go for it, dear.
Apheori (GM): Should I whisper them?
Ellemerr: Only if they contain things that ought to be kept secret.
Gaurav: You could whisper them and let us figure out if our characters would be up for sharing them.
(To Amadi): http://wiki.zaori.org/compendium/Dream_1340 http://wiki.zaori.org/compendium/Dream_1351 http://wiki.zaori.org/compendium/Dream_1352 http://wiki.zaori.org/compendium/Dream_1359
(To The Gravedigger): YOUR DREAM: http://wiki.zaori.org/compendium/Dream_1340
(To Radek): YOUR DREAM: http://wiki.zaori.org/compendium/Dream_1351
(To Greibel): YOUR DREAM: http://wiki.zaori.org/compendium/Dream_1352
(To Rhu): YOUR DREAM: http://wiki.zaori.org/compendium/Dream_1359
Apheori (GM): You all should have received a dream.
I apologise for that.
That was stupid.
Also, as a general note, Rhu wakes up utterly confused.
(To Amadi): And you think that could have gone better.
Gaurav: And checking his hands.
Apheori (GM): Whyso?
Gaurav: To make sure he still has fingers and does not have feathers.
Apheori (GM): Oh, right.
Ganelon: Radek up grumpy. Likely no-one notices.
Radek WAKES up grumpy. My gods.
(From Ellemerr): You did right to do it yourself. Good job, dear.
Frezak (GM): We don't notice the grumping but we tag on the typo
(To Ellemerr): Thanks. >.<
(To Ellemerr): I don't entirely believe you, though.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: This is one of the first proper dreams you've had in awhile. Certainly that you remmeber.
Gaurav: Huh.
If everybody is still waking up, Rhu will take out the Mask of Hairy Sight Amadi gave him and look at his hands and then at Amadi through them. Just in case.
Apheori (GM): His hands look hairy. Amadi looks huge and full of bees. Hairy bees.
Frezak (GM): Whew, everything is normal.
Amadi burps a bee, Winnie the Pooh style.
Apheori (GM): The bees settle down and then she just looks like a brilliant glowing hairy amadi.
Frezak (GM): Gravy scoots nonchalantly over to Radek.
The Gravedigger: Pssssst
Radek: ...What?
Frezak (GM): Out the corner of his mouth.
The Gravedigger: You remember the... thing that wasn't a shovel?
Right?
Radek: I'm not senile /yet/. Yes, I remember.
The Gravedigger: Do you think you could find it again?
If you were back in the region?
And by region I mean dimension rather than geographical location.
Radek opens his mouth to answer, then pauses and thinks about it for a moment.
Ganelon: OOC, I'm actually not sure.
We didn't exactly "find" so much as "stumble upon" it.
Apheori (GM): I don't know either. If that helps.
It's a definite maybe?
Radek: It's possible, but I won't guarantee anything.
The Gravedigger: thanks, Radek.
You're a peach.
Radek scowls.
The Gravedigger: OKAY.
WHO WANTS PORR- I MEAN EGGS.
NO OAT-BASED BREAKFASTS
Radek doesn't raise his own voice.
Radek: I have a question for you, as well.
The Gravedigger: YES? WHA- oops, what is it, Radek?
Frezak (GM): Man, I do like playing Gravy.
Rhu: What sort of eggs? Not ... chicken eggs?
Radek: How likely do you think it is that we will need an exceptionally powerful explosive before the dimensions are completely destabilized?
Amadi: Bee eggs!
Dawn walks in with a yawn and hands Gravy a trowel. It isn't one of his.
Amadi: Mmmmm, bee eggs...
Frezak (GM): Is it a good trowel?
Apheori (GM): Decent.
Not great. Probably matches the style of the area.
Also, I love Radek.
Radek: One capable of... for example, obliterating all life on an average-sized continent, and shattering its tectonic plate?
The Gravedigger: I believe that you have demonstrated an exceptional ability to resolve issues via application of sudden and potent forces. The bigger the better.
Frezak (GM): I pocket the trowel.
Ganelon: That's a reasonable metric, I'm sure.
(To Ellemerr): I completely underestimated the ability of dreams to influence characters. Putting ideas in their heads...
(To Ellemerr): I love it.
Radek: Hrm...
Radek returns to his own thoughts.
Frezak (GM): Gravy is clearly the person to ask about giant bombs.
Apheori (GM): He's perfect.
Ganelon: He's just asking if Gravy thinks we'll need such a thing.
The Gravedigger: (in Rhu's direction) ARE THEY INCUBATING?
(From Amadi): Why do you think I work so hard on giving my players all them dreams, eh? ;)
Frezak (GM): Gravy equips Amadi in his offhand slot and goes looking for eggs.
Rhu: I ... don't feel like chicken today, is all.
The Gravedigger: Ostrich?
Gaurav: Hee. Wouldn't Amadi's pockets contain all the eggs anybody could ever need?
(To Amadi): Because you smart.
Frezak (GM): Would you want them in your mouth, though?
Apheori (GM): You put her sandwiches in your mouth.
Or someone did, anyway.
Amadi: It was the best butter!
Dawn: Butter and beer.
We messed that up. Good thing it wasn't us.
Greibel: mmmmmm
Butterbeer
Gaurav: Rhu did! It didn't end badly at all. Except for the whole falling-in-to-the-terrifying-basement thing.
Rhu: I think I might just skip breakfast today. I had a strange dream. About chickens. *shivers*
Apheori (GM): He also ate what Greibel gave him. Moral of the story: Do not trust party members?
Ganelon: That's a pretty sensible moral.
Frezak (GM): I'll go down to the Inn and see what food they do.
Swinging Amadi thoughtfully.
Amadi yells at Rhu while being swung about,
Amadi: It was only ONE chicken! It wasn't even very big!
Apheori (GM): Dawn runs after him, or possibly Amadi.
Rhu: ... huh? What?
Rhu scurries behind Gravy and Amadi.
Dawn: Two! There were two!
Rhu: You know about my dream? How do you know about my dream? What ... where was I? What happened to me? Why?
Frezak (GM): Presumably with screaming midgets the town now knows that we're back.
Like particularly deranged heralds.
Apheori (GM): Aye.
Gaurav: He tries to time his questions so he asks them when Amadi is facing him mid-swing.
Dawn: (mumbling) Or were there? Time is so funny these days.
Apheori (GM): Amadi: You going to respond?
Radek follows after the others, but he hangs back, still lost in thought.
Ellemerr: Sorry, yes. >.<
I was distracted. >.<
Rhu: (to Dawn) I ... was a chicken? I guess that counts as two? Um ... (he looks shifty-eyed to see if anybody apart from the crazy godlings heard that)
Amadi looks at Rhu as if he's asking questions far beyond her consideration.
Amadi: It was your dream!
Greibel is off in the distance trying to bend two sticks into something like a balloon animal
Apheori (GM): Greibel: d20.
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
5
)
=
5
Amadi: And it was only one chicken.
Frezak (GM): Greibel is now MVP for this game.
Amadi glares at Dawn.
Rhu: It wasn't just a dream if you were in it, was it? It must have been ... oh gods ... a vision. I hope it wasn't a vision. It was the last ...
Dawn: Oh.
Okay.
Amadi: How do me being there make it anything but a dream?
Amadi rolls her eyes.
Amadi: Stupid.
Apheori (GM): Minimum viable product?
Frezak (GM): Most Valuable Peasnat
or Peasant, even.
Peasnat sounds like some slavic dish.
Radek: (To Amadi) Dreams are a poor forum for debate. If you have something to tell us, use your voice rather than invading our subconscious minds.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: The result is very balloon-animaly.
Radek: And I've built /plenty/, incidentally.
The Gravedigger: What, chickens?
Dawn: Dreams tell you what you already know, not anything new. They're the best of you, all you.
Amadi sticks her tongue out at Radek.
Amadi: I didn't invade squat. I was invited. Besides, it wasn't even me.
Dawn: Except when the
y're not.
Greibel: One time I dreamed I had a house made of gold!
Dawn: Wasn't me either.
Greibel: It was very hard to clean.
Radek: I certainly did not invite anyone.
Amadi: Well, you know best, of course. We all know that.
Radek: Hrmph.
Ganelon: If only it were true.
He simply knows the most.
Apheori (GM): You get to the inn and there's a lovely aroma of pancakes and something very meaty. A group of outlanders who look suspiciously like adventurers are also there.
And there's the innkeeper.
Ganelon: Oh, I have to ask.
Apheori (GM): And the bard is unconscious on the foor.
floor
The Gravedigger: HELLO.
Ganelon: How many shady characters are here?
Frezak (GM): If there aren't at least 15 I am done with this game.
Apheori (GM): The adventurers are the shadiest.
Sorry. >.>
It's Dorgin, man.
The innkeeper asks if you're here for breakfast.
The adventurers eye you suspiciously, sizing you up. There are six of them, three in massive armour, one in a loincloth, and two in cloth. Two have hoods shrouding their faces. They're all a bit dirty.
Ganelon: I will give them suspicious looks right back!
Uppity adventurers.
Amadi burps a bee at them.
Frezak (GM): Gravy waves enthusiastically for a bit, then puts down Amadi and resumes waving.
And then plods up to the inkeeper.
Innkeeper: Hello again. What'll it be?
Apheori (GM): One of the armoured adventurers gets up and blocks the path of someone who isn't Gravy.
Whoever's closest. Who is closest?
Ellemerr: Me!
... Maybe.
I mean, I assume he put me down somewhere close.
Apheori (GM): Amadi: A rather large, stinky adventurer with questionable intelligence is glaring down at you.
He has a large sword.
Rhu: (to Innkeeper) Is that pancakes I smell? I'll have two!
Amadi looks up at the big adventurer.
Amadi cocks her head sideways, looking curious.
Amadi kicks the adventurer experimentally on the shin.
The Gravedigger: I'll have yer finest!
Ganelon: Human, I assume?
Dawn walks up to Amadi and stands next to her.
Apheori (GM): The adventurer yells angrily and tries to kick Amadi while getting out his sword entirely.
Ganelon: ...Well alright then!
Apheori (GM): Four humans, one elf, one... large black and whit guy.
Frezak (GM): A panda?
Apheori (GM): The large one is the one harrassing/being harassed by the midgets.
Frezak (GM): A zebraman?
Apheori (GM): Kind of like a panda.
But without the fur.
Frezak (GM): SOmetimes it's hard to tell who's harrassing who when it comes to midgets.
Ganelon: Either way, that sounds like trouble.
Apheori (GM): Amadi: What's your reflex?
Gaurav: If they try to kidnap the midgets, we might finally find out who's the better hostage.
Ganelon: Radek will intervene after this action is resolved.
Ellemerr: At L5 it was 16. I think I should've levelled since then, but I haven't. *shifty eyes*
Apheori (GM): Okay, the guy kicks at Amadi and misses.
He gets out his sword.
Ganelon: That would make it 17.
Amadi frowns.
Amadi: Are you okay? You seem upset.
If I had a sword like that, I wouldn't be upset. It's a very nice sword.
Frezak (GM): How's breakfast coming along?
Apheori (GM): He pauses, looking down at her, confused.
Ganelon: Now this is probably a dumb attack to use on a big guy, buuut...
Apheori (GM): Oh, the innkeeper went to go get the things from the cook or whatever.
Frezak (GM): Sweet.
Gravy leans his back and elbows on the counter and watches.
Ganelon: Radek prepares to use Thundering Armor on Amadi if the big guy actually tries to harm her.
Frezak (GM): He produces some straw from nowhere and chews on it.
Ganelon: He doesn't need his weapon out for that, fortunately.
Apheori (GM): Wait, why do I already have a character thing for Kyrule?
Bizarre.
Blargh.
The large guy doesn't for now, instead just staring down at her for a rather long time. Finally, he just says, "Whah?
"
One of the others tells him to stop harassing the ladies.
Apheori (GM): That one looks like he might be the leader. He's short and in robes.
Frezak (GM): Everyone is short.
Am the tree amongst the wheat.
Amadi: ... Could I have it? I don't think I've got any swords quite that big. And it does look very fun!
Apheori (GM): He says, "Er..." and looks around uncertainly.
The others are just watching.
Frezak (GM): Gravy grins in what may be an encouraging fashion.
Amadi reaches out for the sword.
Apheori (GM): Looking completely dumbfounded, he gives it to her. It's considerably longer than she is tall, and weighs... a lot.
One of the other adventurers yells disappointedly, "Jalik!"
Another tells him to sit down.
Ganelon: Oversized sword acquired...?
Apheori (GM): I dunno if I should make her do a strength check, or just see what she does.
Ellemerr: Her str is 10. I'm considering how much to consider that myself.
Amadi: Woah! You must be very strong! This is much heavier than my other swords. What is it made of? You should've painted more feathers on the hilt! Not on the edge, of course. You want the edge to be heavy. Don't you? I dreamt that I was a sword, once. Except that wasn't really me.
Gaurav: Can't she grow extra muscles if she needs them? Or extra arms?
Ellemerr: I don't think so. But making the sword mysteriously lighter? Probably.
Orcan adventurer: Metal.
Amadi rolls her eyes.
Radek shakes his head and goes to sit down.
Apheori (GM): Meanwhile the cook brings Rhu some pancakes, and Gravy a huge plate of pancakes, eggs, and four types of sausage.
Amadi: Did you want something, anyway?
Apheori (GM): One of the other adventurers starts laughing and buries his face in the table.
The guy just stands there staring at Amadi.
Gaurav: Man, I wish I'd gotten sausages.
Dawn: He wants money and meat and kittens.
We could give him kittens.
Amadi: Oh? Oh! Thanks, Dawn, didn't see that. Why didn't I see that?
Dawn: He didn't see it either.
Amadi picks a tiny, red kitten out of her pocket. It's on fire. Smiling cheerfully, she holds it out to the man.
Amadi: Here you go!
(To Amadi): Actually he just likes fluffy things, and Dawn is completely wrong about the money.
Apheori (GM): Will this kitten do damage?
Ellemerr: You're the DM. I dunno!
Apheori (GM): Hmm.
Ellemerr: It won't to Amadi. :P
Apheori (GM): Heh.
He takes the kitten uncertainly, then, when it doesn't burn him, holds it happily to his face. It purrs.
Frezak (GM): Gravy gets to eating.
Apheori (GM): Several of the other adventurers look quite surprised at this.
Adventurer: Wow.
The Gravedigger: I know, right!
Four kinds!
Adventurer: Jalik likes kittens?
(another one) He's got to like something.
Ganelon: Actually, Radek will give these adventurers a proper look-over now.
Do any of them look wizardly?
Apheori (GM): The orcan with the kitten sits back down, putting and adoring his flaming red kitten.
Another tries to touch it and gets burned.
Ellemerr: Heeee
Apheori (GM): One of the robed ones looks a bit wizardly. The other, the leader, seems to be some kind of healer.
...that should have said petting, not putting.
Also I'll be right back.
Okay, I'm here.
Amadi goes over to Gravy and tries to steal some of his food.
Rhu orders a beer but stays at the bar, trying to make some sense of his disturbing dream.
Frezak (GM): It's really not hard.
Dawn sits next to Rhu and glances over at him expectantly a few times.
Radek approaches the table where the Robed Ones sit. He addresses the wizardly one specifically.
Radek: ...Excuse me. You have the look of a proper intellectual.
Gaurav: Rhu is very, very lost right now. He is in need of beers and enlightenment.
Rhu: (to Dawn) Yes?
The Gravedigger: (in a philosophical tone, to Amadi) Four kinds!
Robed adventurer: Yes? I've put thought into many topics.
Dawn: Yes? What is it?
Amadi: (with her mouth full of his food) Fouw hines!
Rhu: ... nothing. (goes back to thinking, then) Do you think we're important?
Radek: I wish to compare theories.
Ganelon: Radek is going to test this man, first.
With an exchange of arcane jargon.
Dawn: Yes? No. I... don't know. Important how? To what?
Robed adventurer: Indeed? Sit.
Apheori (GM): Arcana-off!
Rhu: Just. Important. I don't know. Like, with these Holes. Do you think we're going to save the world? Be big damn heroes? I thought that's what we were here for, but -- maybe we're going to fail. Maybe it'll all be for nothing.
Dawn: Why be here for anything?
Radek sits.
Dawn: Or you. What do you want?
Radek:
rolling 1d20+16 Arcanababble
(
14
)
+16
=
30
Apheori (GM): Radek: He's impressed, and responds with a string of babble that isn't quite as impressive.
(25)
Ganelon: Ah, excellent!
He's not terrible at this.
Rhu: I want to help. Them. (waves vaguely at the rest of the group). But my god has turned away from me. Whats the point of an avenger without a god? What if my dream was right? What if I just end up empty and alone, stuck in a universe that isn't mine rejecting a god who is a dick failing to fix a problem even my god can't figure out?
Gaurav: Oh crap, I need to leave in a few minutes. Sorry about the lack of warning!
I'll be back in an hour or so if you guys are still around then.
Ellemerr: I will be gone by then. I should leave soon, actually. >.>
Apheori (GM): I should go find you in boulder.
Ganelon: Radek is pleasantly surprised, and it shows in both his face and his tone as he continues.
Pretty much, he wants to talk about the Hole Problem with this fellow.
Apheori (GM): Heheh.
Gaurav: YES
Apheori (GM): Should we continue that while the others bugger off, or all just resume next time when I'm actually prepared?
Ganelon: See if he's tried anything himself, share discoveries (it's the absence of stuff interacting with residual magic!), and so on.
Aah, you can just come back to this.
Apheori (GM): Can everyone do next week?
Dig holes, fight demons, punch gods...
Bear Soup Guy: Sign me up
Apheori (GM): Sorry about the slow start today. I blame... mostly just alcohol, frankly. >.>
Ellemerr: It's fine. You had a grand recovery. :3
I got to throw Kitten at someone! I haven't even seen Kitten in... years. O_o
Gaurav: Next Wednesday sounds great! Now I have to run, so byeeeeeeee! See you all next week!
Apheori (GM): What's the story with that kitten?

Session 47

Apheori (GM): So Radek was talking to the wizardly adventurer, Rhu was being whatever you call it at Dawn, Gravy and Amadi were eating, and Greibel probably buggered off into some corner to smoke.
Rhu: (to Dawn) Some kind of success ... maybe. I don't know. How do you even measure "success" when the fates of entire universes are at stake?
The Gravedigger: Four kinds!
Rhu: That's why you *need* a god, someone who can see broader than you and make sure that you're not just making one piece better by making another much, much worse.
Dawn: You eat it. You take it all up, you set it on fire, and you eat it.
Hah!
Ganelon: Better not be in the "No Toking" section of the bar or he's gonna get dragged off and I'm not defending him to the authorities.
Frezak (GM): Booo
Gravy would!
Dawn: You don't need gods at all. It's the gods that need you, useless leeches that they are.
Ganelon: Show me a prison that could hold Greibel and I might start to care.
Dawn: They'll lie, trick, and fabricate anything to get you to serve them, and what do you get back?
Sushi?
Amadi: Sushi!
Frezak (GM): It's the principle of the thing!
Rhu: EXACTLY!
Amadi produces sushi.
Apheori (GM): How many corrosive substances do you think he needs?
Er, has.
Not needs.
Ganelon: He can become pigeons.
Apheori (GM): ...then again, perhaps he IS a corrosive substance.
Bear Soup Guy: Most of his substances probably serve multiple purposes
Apheori (GM): And there's that.
Rhu: (to Dawn) Right. So. No more gods. Just us. Let's do this thing. Let's save the universe. -Es.
Dawn: Exactly!
Dawn eats some sushi.
Frezak (GM): I once had a character specialised so that he could identify anything by taste.
What meat are the sausages?
If it's human...
NOT EVEN CANNIBALISM
Apheori (GM): Cerrissian moose, pigeon, chicken, pig.
Where cerrissian moose are like a cross between goats and bears. Except moosey.
And the bird one is both birds.
And you've got two seasonings for the pig ones.
Bear Soup Guy: that sounds delicious
Apheori (GM): ...I want sausage. >.<
Gaurav: I have sausage! And also germs.
Bear Soup Guy: I want Cerrisian moose soup
Gaurav: Those pig sausages sound amazing.
Apheori (GM): YES.
Bear Soup Guy: I need to buy sausage meat this week to make scotch eggs
Apheori (GM): GOAT-BEAR-MOOSE SOUP.
Bear Soup Guy: mmmmmm
Gaurav: Ooo, scotch eggs sound exciting. I must try that sometime.
Amadi: Don't eat moose.
Bear Soup Guy: they seem to be pretty easy to make
and they sound utterly delicious
Apheori (GM): They do.
If only I had any of the ingredients...
Bear Soup Guy: Just add everything I just said about scotch eggs to a conversation Greibel is having with an unsuspecting bar patron who is probably a bit trapped in the conversation
Except Greibel probably uses something besides meat for the coating
I wonder what you'd use for a vegetarian scotch egg
some kind of ground up mushy tofu with seasonings?
Apheori (GM): Curried tofu.
CURRIED TOFU.
BRIGHT YELLOW TURMERICKY CURRIED TOFU.
Bear Soup Guy: that sounds lovely
Gaurav: If you like falafel, you could mince that up and maybe that'd work.
Rhu -- having had his lack of faith in gods restored -- finishes his beer and wanders over to Radek and Gravy to see what they're up to.
Bear Soup Guy: I haven't tried falafel but I imagine I'd enjoy it
Hmmm
Ganelon: You'll see in just a moment what Radek is up to.
Apheori (GM): Um, should Rhu's lack of faith have any, erm, mechanical implications?
Greibel: The guy looks disgusted.
Ganelon: 4E doesn't have rules for losing divine powers.
Apheori (GM): Huh.
Ganelon: So... your call.
Frezak (GM): Gravy is enthusiastically eating pancakes and sausages.
Bear Soup Guy: My god, it exists http://www.bbcgoodfood.com/recipes/falafel-scotch-eggs
Frezak (GM): Presumably a huge portion.
Bear Soup Guy: This is my mission for the week
Greibel: (to the guy) YOU CAN COAT THE EGG IN FALAFEL
IT'S GENIUS
Gaurav: Also, he's lost *faith* in the gods. He still believes that Hazz' exists and provides him powers and laughs at him when things suck and stuff.
If his being grumpy with Hazz' over the last week of in-game time hasn't caused his powers to stop working, I don't think his new-found certainty that gods are a waste of space is going to make things _worse_.
Dawn: (nodding) Gods are a waste of space.
Drugs, on the other hand...
Innkeeper: NO. NO DRUGS.
Innkeeper glares at Rhu.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: The guy very, very hesitantly asks you what falafel is.
Greibel: CHICKPEAS!
Greibel procures a handful of slightly lint-covered chickpeas from his pocket and hoists them at the the guy
Rhu: (to Innkeeper) ... what?
Greibel: Eh? Eeeeeeeh?
Gaurav: Do we still have any fanged peas?
Bear Soup Guy: Greibel may have a couple mingling in his pockets still
Frezak (GM): I scan the room for Fanged Eggs.
The Weasel's Bane.
Apheori (GM): Griebel: A couple of the chickpeas sprout fangs and giggle. The porridge leans over, almost like it's eyeing them. Hungrily.
At this point the guy flees.
No fanged eggs. YET.
Frezak (GM): Gravy waves at Greibel.
Gaurav: I should confess that I genuinely forgot why the Innkeeper is glaring at Rhu until just now.
The Gravedigger: FOUR KINDS
Frezak (GM): Rhu was probably just being Rhu.
Probably told him his eyes were hairy or something.
Innkeeper: You mean to tell me you spent all night bouncing off walls mumbling nonsense and you don't even remember?
Dawn: (to Gravy) You should get some for the road.
Rhu looks around to see who the Innkeeper is talking to.
Rhu: ... me? I just got here. We slept at the guardhouse.
Greibel waves at Gravy and walks over to him
Greibel offers Gravy some fanged chickpeas
The Gravedigger: Inkeep! Sausages for the road!
The Gravedigger bangs his fist authoritatively on the table.
Innkeeper: When you were here a few days back. You took those pills and then you just... lost it. You really don't remember.
Frezak (GM): Gravy takes the chickpeas graciously and just hands them to the nearest midget.
Innkeeper: (to Rhu)
(yelling toward the kitchen) Joeh, bundle up some sausages for a guy, will you?
Apheori (GM): There's some sort of muffled confirmation from the kitchen, and something clangs.
Amadi, I think you're the nearest midget.
Radek babbles on at his newfound colleague.
Radek: You see, something fundamental has been missing from each of these environments, as I have observed from its absence, which destabilizes their underlying transdimensional arcane lattices in such a way as to seem almost undetectable... until certain conditions are met. When a spell is cast in such an environment and its current is misapplied during the seventh alignment - obviously those designs which ignore the seventh are unaffected, though other failed configurations may cause problems depending on the severity of the destabilization - holes in /reality itself/ are opened by the escaping energy, connecting the affected dimensions in undesirable and often destructive ways. Now, I have managed to synthesize a functional equivalent to this "reality" which, applied correctly, can undo the damage, but so far this is scarcely more than treating the symptoms rather than the disease, as it were. If a solution cannot be found, I have reason to believe these destabilizations will only worsen, potentially until even spellcraft performed safely and /correctly/ will risk causing damage of this nature.
Ganelon: There you go, guys.
Apheori (GM): Oooo.
Gaurav: o.0
Apheori (GM): Roll arcana so I have an idea what his DC should be, please.
Radek:
rolling 1d20+16 Arcana
(
19
)
+16
=
35
...What do you think?
Ganelon: HA HA HA HA HA
Apheori (GM): Oooo.
27... he understands. You well-explainy-person.
Lessee...
Bear Soup Guy: Groovy
Apheori (GM): ...now do I understand?
Ganelon: Let me make it simple for you.
Go look at my journal page.
"Regarding Gravy talking about planar dissonance"
Apheori (GM): Naw, I just need to add paragraphing somewhere with a better font. >.>
I have text block issues, probably a defense mechanism developed due to dealing with wikipedians.
Amadi stuffs some of the chickpeas into her pockets and sticks the remaining two onto her index fingers and have a puppet theatre with them.
Rhu is rambling something about George and the Wizard's Tower and the cave and blindness, but you can see in his eyes that he's piecing things together.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: Could you actually ramble it, by any chance?
Frezak (GM): All I can see in Rhu's eyes are vengeful bees.
Ganelon: Yes, ramble it.
Just like me.
Wizardly adventurer: Missing...
Gaurav rolls eyes.
Ganelon: Also, is he rambling it at us wizardly folk?
Gaurav: Nope, just at the innkeeper.
Ganelon: Ah, okay.
The Gravedigger nods sagely.
The Gravedigger: Four kinds.
Frezak (GM): Oh, you know Leomund's Chest?
Ganelon: I do now.
Frezak (GM): Hmm.
Ganelon: It was a recent addition.
Rhu: Nah, you've got me confused with someone else. Definitely. We haven't been here since before I -- there was the blindness thing, and that ... so ... but before that ... George, right, and ... but that was ... back then ...
... that was just sandwiches.
The Gravedigger: We need to find whoever made the magic here.
Rhu narrows his eyes at the innkeeper.
The Gravedigger: Midgets?
Rhu: When EXACTLY was this?
The Gravedigger: Who makes magic?
Wizardly adventurer: Planar environements can't support that. Either they are there or there not; trying to patch them with either external or internal measures would result in a corruption in the magic same as the underlying destabilisation itself. If what you're saying is true, the entire thing could fall apart at any moment...?
Apheori (GM): I need to go count up exactly when it was.
Dawn: What magic?
The Gravedigger: The magic that makes holes.
These are magic holes.
made with magic.
So we find whoever makes magic.
And get them to withdraw their clearly defective product.
Amadi wiggles a pea at Gravy and says in a squeaky pea-voice,
Amadi: It wasn't me, I swear! I'm innocent! I'm innocent! Please don't eeeeeat meeeee!
Innkeeper: Five nights ago. You had a real trip, too.
Ganelon: If Radek were paying attention to Gravy, he'd be scowling so hard right now.
Dawn: (to Amadi) Are you sure? Are you really, absolutely sure?
Dawn waggles her fingers menacingly.
Rhu looks confusedly at the innkeeper, then at Amadi, then back at the innkeeper.
Rhu: (to Amadi) You remember this, right? You rescued me from ... somewhere?
You grinned a lot and dragged me back here.
(To Ellemerr): I love nightmares. So... maleable.
Ganelon: So to clarify what this wizard said...
Amadi waggles her other pea and booms in a deep, maniacal pea-voice,
Amadi: It was I! I did it, and I am proud that I did it! And I would do it again! You all had it coming, and you deserve every bit of it! Muahahahaha!
Ganelon: 1. Planar environments can't support what?
2. Radek's bandaid fix of "make more reality" is just that?
The Gravedigger: Aha!
Problem solved!
Help us, Mr. Pea.
The Gravedigger kneels in front of Amadi's chickpea fingerpuppet
The Gravedigger: Save us!
(to dave) isn't it usuall a god that does magic for a place?
Apheori (GM): He seems to be getting at something in the nature of the planes where they can't support the sort of... thinness behind the holes. They're either there or not. Though you've found that to not be the case at least here, so he might be referring to other planes, or not know what he's talking about, or something else entirely.
And yeah, he seems to think that.
He also looks pretty worried, like something is dawning on him.
Rhu opts to ignore Amadi for the moment.
Rhu: (to Innkeeper) So ... it looked like I was having an acid trip in here? After I ate some pills?
I don't remember eating any pills. I ate a sandwich, and I think I tried to get a beer. But a mask was involved, so ...
Amadi looks a little worried at Gravy and says in her normal voice,
Amadi: I'm not sure she can. I think that's what you're for.
Dawn: Well, it can be. Really depends on the god. And the magic.
And the place.
I mean, what are gods? Is the universe, if it develops sentience, a god?
Radek: Oh, I expect the process will be quite gradual. A slow acceleration towards complete anarchy, at worst, of which we are presently in the early stages of.
Dawn suddenly looks terrified for a moment and glances at Amadi.
Dawn: Meep.
Innkeeper: I don't know about acid, but you were definitely tripping something.
Amadi is oblivious to this look, as she has decided to eat the two peas and is happily playing out their "Please don't eat me"s and "I shall have my vengeance, fool!"s with great glee.
Innkeeper: Whatever he gave you.
Innkeeper indicates Greibel.
Rhu looks at Greibel.
Bear Soup Guy: Throw in a little "Curse you sudden but inevitable betrayal"
Dawn: You're for.
Ellemerr: Of course! :D
Dawn: ?
Ellemerr: Who is Dawn saying that at?
Apheori (GM): Um...
Gravy!
While trying to hide behind Amadi.
Clinging to her sleeve a little.
Rhu: (to Greibel) Did you give me something? That night, when ... with George? Before the cave?
Radek: Your statement about planar environments, however, is demonstrably untrue. Try to find one of these "holes", if you can convince your minions to follow you there, and see for yourself. The environments of which you speak have... thinned out, I suppose you could say.
Greibel shrugs
Greibel: You guys are always asking me for drugs. You take a pill, I take a pill, I forget, we have cake.
Wizardly adventurer: According to distrophy theory that should be normal, but we wouldn't even feel the effects. What you're describing are real, physical manifestations of a far more advanced degredation, where entire planes would be blinking out of existence.
How can you know that isn't happening? If the entire world is gone, how do measure the change?
Rhu: (to Greibel) What sort of pill was it? Could it have made me feel ... like I was crawling through an elf-sized intestine?
Adventurer: Minions, eh?
You talking about the rifts?
Greibel: Heh, heh.
The Gravedigger: Hmmmm.
The porridge jiggles and eats chickpeas.
Greibel: Yeah, that's a definite possibility.
Oh man, good times.
Rhu: Huh.
Radek: Well, depending on the scope of this phenomenon-
Radek pauses for a moment at the mention of "rifts" and looks over at the other adventurer. It's evident from his face alone that he doesn't believe he's addressing an intellectual equal.
Radek: ...Yes, we are.
Ganelon: Sorry, nameless adventurer. Gotta be cantankerous whenever the opportunity arises.
Rhu: (to Innkeeper) So I was tripping ... here? In this inn?
I'm really sorry, if I had any idea that's what the pill would do ... I was blind at the time, and seeing everything hairy, and there was this mask ...
Innkeeper: Until we finally just threw you out, yes.
Adventurer: (nudging the wizardly one) What do you say? Wanna check that out?
Rhu: Oh. Um. Did I break anything?
Frezak (GM): Gravy scoff at the nothing.
Puny Avenger arms!
Ganelon: Man, did I just become a questgiver to a bunch of NPC adventurers?
Adventurer: Throw in the impudent?
Frezak (GM): THe only thing you could break is a sweat!
Adventurer doesn't look particularly pleased at Radek's addressment.
Orcan adventurer: Throw.
Wizardly adventurer is still petting the Kitten.
Orcan adventurer: (this guy, I mean)
Orcan adventurer is still petting the Kitten.
Ellemerr: Kitten is still on fire and probably purring like a... fire. Yeah.
Radek smirks.
Radek: Threaten me all you like. I've traversed these "rifts" unscathed.
Wizardly adventurer: (to Radek) Thinned, is it? And where the lattice is just gone, that is a rift?
Frezak (GM): Incidentally, this is how Gravy carries Amadi when I say 'equip'
http://hw1.pa-cdn.com/camp/assets/img/katie/comics/140_stage_direction2.jpg
Ganelon: DM, is that accurate?
Apheori (GM): Heheh.
Ganelon: I don't entirely know what my own character is talking about.
Apheori (GM): Uh...
Gaurav: Hee.
Apheori (GM): Sort of.
I mean, you got from Sarathi fine.
Mostly.
Ganelon: UNSCATHED
AS FAR AS /THEY/ KNOW.
Apheori (GM): And that time you made a hole in subspace and nearly destroyed everything... well, sure, I don't suppose you took any physical damage, at least.
...sure?
Frezak (GM): No-one we know died!
Ganelon: Hey, I fixed it from the inside!
Frezak (GM): Or was horribly mutilated!
Apheori (GM): Except the giant.
Radek: (To the wizard) In so many words, yes.
Frezak (GM): I don't remember any giants!
Gaurav: The one the arch fell on.
Frezak (GM): Nope.
No-one we know!
Wizardly adventurer: So what's to stop it from continuing to unravel? Why... are we even still here?
Frezak (GM): We're heroes!
The Gravedigger: Wait, am I supposed to be a god?
The Gravedigger waggles hands over Amadi
The Gravedigger: Graves, graves, graves, blessed!
Howzzat? Feel tingly?
Ganelon: Do... I even have an answer to that question?
Amadi: Always.
Apheori (GM): Uh...
Frezak (GM): Radek always has an answer!
Apheori (GM): Nope!
Dawn: Never.
The Gravedigger: So on average...
Doing good!
The Gravedigger practises blessing things.
Radek: An answer I am still contemplating, I'm afraid.
Apheori (GM): XD
Radek: Tell me, have you heard of Sarathi?
Wizardly adventurer: Was that that...
The Gravedigger waggles hands over Greibel's bong and mutters grave measurements under his breath.
The Gravedigger: I pronounce this Bong to be Friend Of Graves.
Adventurer: That was Serida.
The Gravedigger: Take drugs with my blessing.
Wizardly adventurer: Oh.
No.
Apheori (GM): The bong glows.
...a moment later, Amadi glows too.
Frezak (GM): Gravy is unsurprised because that is what blessings do.
He'll roll up his sleeves and look for converts.
Greibel raises an eyebrow
Wizardly adventurer: Can't say I have.
Amadi: Shiny!
Frezak (GM): Go to some random peasant and tell them about the wonderful religion that involves burying people.
Disciples!
The Gravedigger: -and always have a trowel. now, to measure someone by eye-
Radek: Sarathi may no longer exist. When my...
Radek glances at his own party.
Radek: .../Research team/, arrived, the destabilizing effects of the rifts were no longer localized.
Wizardly adventurer: GravyL You have two locals, the innkeeper, some adventurers, and a very groggy cook giving you a package of sausages to choose from.
ooc
Frezak (GM): Gravy turns his head 180° degrees when Radek glances back and waves.
Apheori (GM): Gravy:
Ganelon: He can do that?
Frezak (GM): Yeah.
Apheori (GM): Heee, research team.
Frezak (GM): As part of my eagle Eye power I can rotate my head like an owl.
Gaurav: You must be very popular at parties.
Frezak (GM): I'll take the most delicious sausages and tell Amadi to pay the inkeep while I go convert the locals.
Radek: Unfortunately, incompetence and the planar phenomena occurring in the area stymied my efforts. The discoveries I have made since have only been in more controlled environments.
Amadi pays the inkeep in dancing, golden fleas.
The Gravedigger: -never ask anyone about their health because they'll think you're drumming for business-
Wizardly adventurer: Discrete rifts may account for a lack of anomalies on this side, but it may also be a matter of which planes...
Apheori (GM): Gravy: So you're talking to the villager that Greibel didn't corner before. The one he did takes one look at you and leaves.
Innkeeper: (to Amadi) Um.
Do you have any... more standard currency?
Frezak (GM): I imagine Amadi beaming like a small child as she hands the guy this handful of gilded bugs.
Amadi: Yes, but you don't want them.
Innkeeper: I'm reasonably sure I do.
Even if you are glowing and possibly...
Innkeeper suddenly stop and just takes the fleas and backs away.
Innkeeper: stops*
Apheori (GM): Gravy: As you talk to the guy about graves and stuff, he nods, staring at you intently. He seems a bit frightened, but you know, in your liver, that he is yoooours.
Ganelon: Trust your liver, Gravy.
The Gravedigger: -and always trust your liver-
Radek: Hrrm...
Radek takes out his tablet and begins to record the other wizard's speculations.
Radek: ...I don't suppose you have one of these, do you?
Wizardly adventurer: (he frowns) I have notes.
Wizardly adventurer pulls out a disturbingly ornate notebook.
Apheori (GM): Complete with gold and silver inlays and a skull.
Ganelon: Fancy.
But ANTIQUATED.
Apheori (GM): He flips to a page in the middle. It starts out blank, but words form on it as he traces a finger over it.
Radek: Here.
Radek turns his tablet around and brings up the start of a lengthy display on his hole-related findings.
Ganelon: Good thing I took all this down!
In-character.
OOC I have... fragments.
There's probably stuff in there about how he opened a hole inside an extradimensional space and then repaired it from the inside.
Apheori (GM): He taps it and adds everything to his journal, exactly as displayed.
Then he starts actually reading it.
Greibel: Ooo-hooo, wizard fight!
Ganelon: They're not playing chess, Greibel!
Gaurav: "Dear Diary, today I almost destroyed the universe! It all started with a brilliant plan to create a Hole inside a pocket universe temporarily filled with dragons ..."
Ganelon: ...I could see someone intruding upon two old men playing chess in the park and shouting "Wizard fight!", though.
I guess the real deal is more impressive.
Apheori (GM): The wizard's face goes through a whole variety of expressions - first normal, then confusion, then disbelief, more confusion, horror, incredulity, then disgust.
...he rolled a 2. He doesn't believe you.
Ganelon: Disgust? At /moi/?
Frezak (GM): He just shouts "FOUR KINDS??!!"
Apheori (GM): He thinks you're making this up.
Wizardly adventurer: Oh, clever. You almost had me, but this is just ridiculous.
Radek: ...Excuse me?
Radek is deadly serious.
Wizardly adventurer: What you describe is impossible. That can't have happened, and the laws of magic do not allow for this.
This... fabrication.
The Gravedigger: The LAW? The law is a.. human institution.
Frezak (GM): Because O'Brother references.
Radek sputters.
Radek: F-fabrication!?
Apheori (GM): The adventurer next to him raises an eyebrow, suddenly looking much more interested.
Wizardly adventurer: This.
Wizardly adventurer pushes Radek's tablet back toward Radek.
Amadi comes over, sitting down on the adventurers' table and looking intently at the Wizardly one.
Rhu caves and orders a plate of sausages.
Radek rises to his knobbly old man feet and swipes the tablet back into his arms.
Radek: How dare you suggest I would simply /invent/ such a thing for... what, my own amusement?
This is no childish prank, fool!
Ganelon: Names, if I may ask a rather important question...
How easy would it be to create a Hole?
Not /here/, necessarily, but you know. Somewhere.
Wizardly adventurer: I'm sorry, even if you're serious, it just doesn't add up. Revisit your conclusions, and you'll see.
Apheori (GM): Uh...
The Gravedigger: -and help the weak! Incidentally, I have to go support my grump. You may observe."
Apheori (GM): You probably could repeat it.
What you did in the pocket dimension.
Frezak (GM) plods over to stand behind Radek.
The Gravedigger plods over to stand behind Radek.
The Gravedigger: Hello!
COuldn't help but overhear you disbeleivin' Grumps here.
I'll have you know he's a very smart man.
Wizardly adventurer tries to lean away, but he's a bit surrounded at this point.
Apheori (GM): A couple of the other adventurers get up.
Another falls over and yawns hugely.
Frezak (GM): Gravy is beaming helpfully.
Radek: ...No.
I will /show/ you.
Apheori (GM): Oh gods.
The Gravedigger: No you won't!
The Gravedigger picks up Radek
Dawn: Um, that that that... please don't do that.
The Gravedigger marches off with Radek.
The Gravedigger: PLeasure meeting you!
Frezak (GM): We can roll off if you want, gan.
Dawn: (to the adventurers) You guys just check it out, okay?
Frezak (GM): PVP and all that.
Dawn runs after Gravy.
Radek: Put me down, you oaf! This... this /upstart/ thinks he can insult my research and you're taking HIS SIDE!?
Apheori (GM): The adventurer who fell over and gets up looking around, wondering what he missed.
Wizardly adventurer: Um, yes, er, we'll do that...
Wizardly adventurer hastily gets up and backs away.
The Gravedigger: I'm ensuring a peaceful dialogue that does not result in tearing apart spacetime!
Radek: I can repair the damage! I've done it twice before!
Frezak (GM): I want to... bore him to sleep.
With technical grave-talk.
Ganelon: "Sleep"?
GOOD LUCK.
Frezak (GM): I'm a god, I can do whatever I want.
Otherwise I'm dumping you in a pocket universe until you cool down.
Amadi looks over the Wizardly guy's shoulder at his notebook. Then she points out a line to him.
Amadi: See there? That's where you're right. It doesn't make sense.
But that doesn't mean Radek is wrong. He's not. If you believe he is... Well. You're in a spot of danger, eh.
Good luck.
Amadi jumps off the table, grins at the adventurers, and finds Greibel.
Wizardly adventurer: Eh?
Wizardly adventurer looks at the spot, which is a completely different spot than he'd even noticed before, and then stares after Amadi.
Ellemerr: I'm not even sure where Greibel is right now. Sorry.
Apheori (GM): Neither am I.
Just drag him from the bar.
Rhu's eating sausages there too.
Gaurav: They are delicious.
Apheori (GM): Where are Gravy and Radek?
And would you like to roll... boredomeness?
Frezak (GM): I'm just outside.
Apheori (GM): With something... applicable, whatever that would be.
Frezak (GM): I'm going to say...
Int skill, proficiency, Vs Will?
Bear Soup Guy: Greibel's just been wandering around within the close vicinity of everybody else
Radek shouts as he's carried off.
Radek: You'll see! When your reality is reduced to nothing but scattered threads, the man who repairs it all will be Radek J. Fulvius! Cling to your so-called "laws" and see how well they protect you when the time finally comes, fool!
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+4+5
(
17
)
+4+5
=
26
Bear Soup Guy: As Amadi approaches he starts screaming about falafel scotch eggs
Frezak (GM): Vs Will
Rhu shoves the last of the sausage into his mouth, leaves some money from the wizard tower to pay for his meal, and then heads outside to where Gravy and Radek are.
Ganelon: Well his Will is 19.
Amadi joins in the screaming.
Frezak (GM): It's basically using intimidation rules on a different stat set.
I just want radek to sleep or at least just zone out blankly.
Ganelon: Except there's no rules for intimidating PCs.
Greibel: Listen, I know those TARDIS pockets of yours are always turning up useful things. Do you happen to have a frying pan, oil, and the ingredients for such a dish?
Ganelon: Anyway, carry him far enough away and he'll at least stop shouting.
The Gravedigger 's tone turns deadly serious.
The Gravedigger: Okay, now calm down or i'll ask one of the godshards to calm you down, understand?
Frezak (GM): Presumably it's just Gravy and Radek right now.
Apheori (GM): They're outside now, Dawn ran after.
Rhu'll catch up in a moment too.
Amadi and Greibel are... uh... doing stuff inside.
Amadi: Er... I have...
Amadi drags up a really tiny frying pan, some swedish meat balls, a faberge egg, and scotch whiskey in a fancy hip flask.
Radek: If that ignorant child requires a demonstration, it is well within my capabilities to provide one.
Ganelon: Names, if I might ask, how ironclad are these "laws" of magic?
The Gravedigger: Zip it. We're here to fix this problem, not just replicated it because of your damn ego.
Apheori (GM): A good chunk of it was the guy not knowing what he was talking about.
Ganelon: Radek is certainly nuts enough to disregard them, but it would help if he were aware that his theories are the equivalent of, say, disproving gravity.
Apheori (GM): But what laws there are are pretty important normally.
The Gravedigger: You talk about disrupting reality like that over such a petty matter and you're going into a hole, comprende?
Apheori (GM): Just think physics or something.
Radek: Good!
Apheori (GM): So things like gravity, strong and weak forces...
Something something.
I have no idea.
Ganelon: No, that's totally fine.
Apheori (GM): "Good!"
Heh.
Radek: I needed a new testing environment, anyways!
Gaurav: Relevant XKCD: http://xkcd.com/1489/
I hope scotch faberge eggs becomes this inn's new speciality.
Ganelon: It's just that if this is a law of physics as consistent and widely accepted as gravity, it makes a lot of sense that he would be shunned for suggesting circumstances under which it doesn't apply.
Or rather, a law of magics.
Apheori (GM): Oh, aye, it might be.
I don't know what the laws THEY THINK are.
Because those are probably even weirder than the real things.
Ganelon: Regarding magic? Oh, who even knows.
Magic is a total mess.
Apheori (GM): Even without holes tearing it up. >.>
Ganelon: I don't believe in sane wizards.
Anyone who wields the power of magic without requiring an intricate understanding of it is welcome to be a socially well-adjusted and mentally healthy individual.
A wizard, though? Nope.
Apheori (GM): So what does Greibel do with Amadi's accoutrements?
Bear Soup Guy: He takes them holds them out carefully, assessing their suitability
He seems satisfied
And then he mushes everything together with his hands like a barbarian
Apheori (GM): Greibel: d20
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20
(
4
)
=
4
Apheori (GM): You wind up with a faberge meatball full of scotch.
Greibel shrugs
Greibel: Close enough
Greibel feeds it to Rasputin
Rasputin devours it and dribbles bits of egg down Greibel's shirt.
Apheori (GM): Hardboiled egg, at that. Somehow.
So what now?
Bear Soup Guy: Greibel grins widely
Ganelon: I dunno. We've got a half hour before we lose the Merr.
Gaurav: Did Gravy manage to stop Radek from destroying the universe again?
Ellemerr: Lost and gone.
Ganelon: Radek didn't destroy the universe!
He destroyed a pocked dimension and everything else was totally fine.
Pocket, even.
Gaurav: Only because Hazz' stepping in, saved the day, and got bonked on the nose!
Frezak (GM): Poor Hazz.
Apheori (GM): Hazz only helpef. Technically it was Radek and Amadi who actually fixed it.
Frezak (GM): Nobody appreaciates him.
Gaurav: Oh, okay. Well, Rhu thinks it was all Hazz'. Last decent thing he did, really.
Ganelon: I remember Amadi saving Radek.
I don't remember what either of them actually did to fix things.
Ellemerr: I don't. O_o
Apheori (GM): They rolled a lot of arcana.
Session 24. I just finished it the other day.
Ganelon: Oh, neat.
Ellemerr: Sooo... What now? xD
If we don't know, I guess I could go sleep early.
Apheori (GM): Next week y'all want to head out for the airship? Take a stop at the tree?
Check that out.
On the way.
There's also farms and treants and stuff.
Gaurav: Rhu needs to walk the sausages off.
I think the airship sounds most interesting, followed by tree, followed distantly by treats.
treants*
Apheori (GM): Well, in terms of proximity, that's exactly backwards.
Frezak (GM): Yeah, I wanted to check out the airship.
Apheori (GM): Tree
's on the way to the airship.
Treeants are off to the side, so you'd have to actually go out of your way for those. But if you did, it'd be before the tree.
Gaurav: Inn -> Tree -> Airship, then? Unless anyone really wants to go see those treats?
Ugh autocorrect
Apheori (GM): Greibel can talk to the tree and then you can actually maybe get out of there?
Ganelon: Sure.
Apheori (GM): WITHOUT ZOMBIES?
Frezak (GM): Eh, trees.
Apheori (GM): I know, digging through roots is awful.
Next wednesday?
Frezak (GM): Looks like it.
Apheori (GM): Hmm, maybe it should be zombies.
De-zombie the airship...
Bear Soup Guy: Yes
Please
That's all I want
Apheori (GM): Zombies?
Bear Soup Guy: Is undead on an airship
Undead or ghosts
Apheori (GM): Excellent!
Okay see you all then get good sleep don't go outside in the snow if you're sick la la la this'll end in tears.
Gaurav: *Ghosts*! That sounds like fun. Zombies will be fine too.
See you all next Wednesday!
Ellemerr: Right. Thanks. Sweet daydreams and nightmares, one and all.
Frezak (GM): And remember, kids.
FOUR KINDS
Apheori (GM): Radek gets the airship off the ground and ghosts come out of the walls. I like this idea.
...you open the package and find SIX KINDS.
Gaurav gasps.
Apheori (GM): Sweet nightmares, merrrrs.
Bear Soup Guy: :O
Adios!
Ganelon: ...Is there a kind of draug suited to flying airships?
Ellemerr: If you cut the airship in half, sure.
Apheori (GM): Draug?
Ellemerr: Norwegian "undead/ghost" of the sea, the souls of drowned sailors who bring deadly storms and bad luck.
Frezak (GM): Also salmon.
Apheori (GM): Oh, probably.
Ganelon: If I remember right, they're well-known for sailing wrecked, formerly-sunken ships that honestly are no longer seaworthy.
Apheori (GM): On the other hand, maybe that was why it crashed. Because they do go differently in the air...
Ellemerr: They sail in ruined (not sail-worthy) ships, often against the ship (like the Dutchman). Very often, their ship will be cut in half.
Ganelon: You mean against the wind?
Ellemerr: against the wind*
Yes.
Ganelon: Yeah. Only other thing I remember them is that aesthetically they /look/ like drowned corpses.
Ellemerr: Though usually not as extreme as TSW's.
They don't look long-dead.
Ganelon: Well no, I don't imagine many of them use bellies full of eels as a means of locomotion.
Ellemerr: Just... dead. And drowned. And full of sea-weeds.
Apheori (GM): EELS/
.
Frezak (GM): EELWHORES
YES
Ellemerr: But now: sleep.
Apheori (GM): Yes.

Session 48

Apheori (GM): This is getting seriously annoying.
Is this thing working and is everyone here?
Namely frezak. I see names for everyone else.
Ellemerr: He's coming.
Frezak (GM): Yo.
Apheori (GM): FINALLY.
Ellemerr: O_o
Apheori (GM): My internet sucks. And firefox sucks. And I'd bet this sucks too. Put them all together and it's just one big lump of suck.
Where even were we?
Ganelon: I think Radek was threatening to destroy everything.
Gaurav: We have a a faberge meatball full of scotch.
Apheori (GM): Naw, Greibel fed that to the porridge.
But yes, Radek was apparently very upset.
Y'all want to continue that conversation, or just head out to the airship and tree, or what?
And Gravy's apparently a god.
(http://wiki.zaori.org/wiki/Holes/Session_47)
Ganelon: I don't think it needs to be continued. Radek's either angrily shouting at Gravy or rendered catatonic by boredom.
Frezak (GM): I could lecture you on shovel techniques if you want.
Ellemerr: Oh joy.
Gaurav: He can angrily shout at Gravy as we head towards the airship maybe?
Apheori (GM): Does Gravy carry Radek toward the airship?
Ganelon: Either way, it's probably not dialogue that I need write.
Apheori (GM): Do you wait for Greibel?
Ganelon: Were we going straight there? I thought there was some kind of arboreal detour planned.
Frezak (GM): I'll put him down when he stops looking like he might do something dangerous.
Apheori (GM): The tree is on the way.
Unless you get completely lost.
I suggest taking Greibel with you.
Ganelon: Pfft.
Like we'd need a druid for tree things.
Apheori (GM): ...or navigating deep woods in general.
Gaurav: Or turning into a flock of bees and finding us a way out.
Frezak (GM): Hey, I have... some nature skill.
Bear Soup Guy: Well it's not like he was gonna stay behind
Apheori (GM): Yeah, well, he was the only one who knew where things were in the first place.
Good, good.
Bear Soup Guy: Protip
He no longer remembers :P
Apheori (GM): Greibel comes out and leads you off into the BUSH.
And doesn't tell anyone he has no idea where he's going.
Bear Soup Guy: Excellent
I've been trying to think of justification for why we went out to do a million other things when we needed the airship
This makes sense now
Apheori (GM): You head south.
It's all foresty.
Gaurav: Are there insects?
Apheori (GM): Between Greibel and Gravy, you make a good trail out of basically nothing and then wind up at a river.
There are insects, though not crazy amounts. A fair bit of flying bugs, and various things eating foliage.
It's fairly wet.
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20+14 Nature the river
(
5
)
+14
=
19
Gaurav: How does one nature a river?
Bear Soup Guy: VERY CAREFULLY
And wearing a wet-suit
Apheori (GM): By taking samples and splashing in it and possibly by throwing water balloons.
Bear Soup Guy: That too
Greibel throws a water balloon that narrowly avoids hitting Radek
Apheori (GM): It's a nice river, very wet, fairly low this time of year, though from the look of it it gets much higher through-put at other times.
Ganelon: A glancing blow wouldn't explode anyways!
Apheori (GM): This looks like it's near the start, or something.
How much DOES Greibel remember?
Rhu looks at the river grumpily, swatting at the insects.
Bear Soup Guy: He remembers that we came out here for some reason
Apheori (GM): A slug falls on Rhu's ear.
Bear Soup Guy: And that there may be treants around
Apheori (GM): D20!
Frezak (GM): IS IT PROPHETIC?
Apheori (GM): It seems to be slimey. Greibel could discover more.
Ganelon: Wasn't that snails?
Apheori (GM): NO.
Frezak (GM): Slug.
Bear Soup Guy: I'm sure that there's plenty of slime to go around between them
Rhu doesn't notice it for a bit.
Apheori (GM): BSG: d20.
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20
(
19
)
=
19
Oh! I thought that was directed at Rhu,s orry.
Apheori (GM): Ah, sorry.
Gaurav: Rhu gets slugs, not d20s. Actually, it has been a while since Rhu went insane, so ... that's nice.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You're reasonably sure the treants are on the other side of the river.
Greibel stands and points silently across the river
Frezak (GM): There!
Zulus!
Radek stares at Greibel and sighs.
Radek: What? What is it now?
Frezak (GM): Thousands of them!
Dawn: He wants us to cross.
Frezak (GM): Gravy goes and stands on the river.
Radek: ...Fine.
Apheori (GM): The water? Or a rock?
Ganelon: How deep is the river?
Apheori (GM): I need a d20 for the water.
Ganelon: And how wide, actually?
Frezak (GM): The water.
I ahve waterwalk boots.
I can just stand on water.
Apheori (GM): Oh, you do?
Okay.
Ganelon: I made him waterwalking boots.
And myself Prestidigitating Digits.
Rhu scratches at his ear, notices the slug, picks it off his ear and pokes at it.
Apheori (GM): It's several meters wide and the deep points are maybe a meter or two deep, but you can just avoid those.
Ganelon: Oh, I intend to avoid allll of it.
Radek uses his L6 utility.
Apheori (GM): Ride Gravy!
Ganelon: PHANTOM STRUCTURE
Ellemerr: I'll take the ride, of course.
Apheori (GM): Is Amadi riding Gravy?
Excellent.
Ganelon: Suit yourselves!
Basically Radek makes a hardlight bridge.
Apheori (GM): Dawn does an uncoordinated running flapping thing over it and winds up flying headlong into a tree on the other side.
Dawn: Bridddge.
Gaurav: Does the river look safe to swim? Water not moving too fast and all that?
Ellemerr: You can just use the bridge.
Ganelon: "Choose a square within range and another square within range and within 2+your intelligence modifier(+5) squares of the chosen square. You create a phantasmal bridge between the two squares that lasts until the end of your next turn (sustain minor). The bridge connects the two chosen squares by the shortest path. The bridge has no height, and a creature can pass through the square containing the bridge as though it were normal terrain, even if it normally contains no terrain, difficult terrain, challenging terrain, or hindering terrain."
Gaurav: Oh! And whah.
Rhu puts the slug down on some nearby vegetation and crosses Radek's bridge.
Radek appraises his bridge proudly, and with Rhu having conveniently tested its stability, he crosses over as well.
Apheori (GM): Does Greibel use the bridge?
Ganelon: There was probably no doubt that it would have worked.
Gaurav: Rhu's role in this party is striker/religion/lab rat.
Bear Soup Guy: Greibel turns into a far-too-large-for-this-situation large whale and scales the river
Frezak (GM): And HairSpeaker
Ganelon: It's probably a good thing Radek is more of a tinkerer than an alchemist.
Gaurav: BSG: show-off.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: Um... roll athletics.
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20+1
(
2
)
+1
=
3
XD
Gaurav: The whale fails, flails and wails as it heads downstream to unknown seas.
Apheori (GM): Greibel gets stuck.
You now have a... rivered whale.
Frezak (GM): Gravy applauds.
Gaurav: Is he near the bridge? Maybe Gravy and Rhu could lasso him and pull him out of whatever he's stuck on/in/against.
Apheori (GM): He's about as long as the river is wide.
You could probably have used HIM as a bridge.
But yeah, he's near it.
Gaurav: Darnit. If it'd waited a bit longer, ... yes. That.
"Remember that time we crossed Greibel? That was fun times."
Bear Soup Guy: Nobody's ever patient enough for the whale bridge
Gaurav: Hee.
He can probably turn into ducks or something.
Apheori (GM): Does the whale do anything, or does it just sit there?
Frezak (GM): I'm not using any bridge.
I'm doing the Jesus Lizard run.
God Gravy.
Same thing.
Apheori (GM): Also Dawn gets up and giggles.
Bear Soup Guy: Greibel flails for a while before turning back to normal and falling into the river
Then he swims up and spits water out
Like in a Bugs Bunny cartoon
Apheori (GM): This party is so wonderfully uncoordinated.
Y'all head out?
Greibel: Where are you trying to go?
Bear Soup Guy: Toward the treants!
Rhu misses his slug friend.
Frezak (GM): You abandoned hiiiim
To the cruel mercies of the forest
Gaurav: I think we should head for the airship. The treats sound like a random encounter :-/
Apheori (GM): Gaurav: As far as you know, that is where you're going.
Well, maybe. Roll nature.
Gaurav: The last time Rhu took on a pet, it tried to eat us all.
Apheori (GM): Whereas Greibel's brought him truffles.
Rhu:
rolling d20+10 nature check
(
3
)
+10
=
13
Rasputin wiggles
Ganelon: If we encounter hostile treants, I think I can manage fire damage now.
Or, we could count on them being too slow to actually catch us.
And just walk away.
Apheori (GM): Yeah, Rhu has no idea you're going the wrong direction.
Along the way, Dawn scoots up to Radek and says, "So Gravy's a god now."
Radek scoffs and gives Dawn a dismissive swat.
Frezak (GM): Well he IS walking on water.
Ganelon: I DON'T BELIEVE IN GRAVY
Dawn giggles.
Apheori (GM): Gravy: Nature.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+11
(
4
)
+11
=
15
Gaurav: I need to leave in around 35 mins for class and stuff, but I can be back an hour after that.
Apheori (GM): Gravy: You
re not sure this is the right direction.
Frezak (GM): I'll point in a direction that seems more productive.
The Gravedigger: This way, team!
Apheori (GM): d20
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20
(
19
)
=
19
Apheori (GM): You wind up going the exact opposite direction Greibel chose.
Now fight.
Gaurav: o.0
Ganelon: ...
Gaurav: Maybe we should just roll a d360 and head in whatever direction it points us to.
Ganelon: Radek is conflicted.
Bear Soup Guy: Rock'em Sock'em Robots!
Ellemerr: Amadi is still riding Gravy.
Ganelon: He doesn't have faith in Greibel's directional skills.
And he doesn't have faith in Gravy's divinity.
Bear Soup Guy: Honestly Greibel's already probably forgotten where he was going
I think he just files in line behind Gravy
Radek: Do I really need to take over basic navigation for us as well?
Dawn: Oh, they just don't agree on where we're going, that's all.
Frezak (GM): I'm going to ignore Radek and hum a in a merry fashion.
Dawn: Where were we going?
Dawn follows after Gravy as well.
Dawn: Do you... mind that I'm following you around? Is that polite?
Gaurav: (to Dawn) Thataway, I think. points
The Gravedigger: We are going....
TO ADVENTUUUUUUURE
Ganelon: Hey.
Apheori (GM): Gaurav: I assume that was in character, and which way did you point relative to the others?
Ganelon: May I see the map?
Gaurav: My last was IC, sorry.
Ganelon: OOC, I mean.
Apheori (GM): Did anyone actually write down the map?
http://wiki.zaori.org/wiki/File:Holes_dorgin_area_map.jpg
Ganelon: Okay, good, my memory was pretty accurate.
Radek: If Greibel's testimony is to be believed, to the wreckage of a crashed airship north of Dorgin.
Ganelon: Didn't remember the name Dorgin, though.
Amadi gives Dawn a look of astonishment (though it might not be genuine).
Amadi: What did you just say?
Apheori (GM): Neither did I.
You're all heading back the way you came.
Gaurav: Rhu pointed in the direction we were headed previously. Maybe. This forest is confusing.
The Gravedigger leans over Radek.
The Gravedigger: Aaaadventuuuuuure
Dawn: (to Amadi) I don't know. I mean, what am I doing? Should I be doing something?
(to Rhu) But why? What's there? Do you know?
Gaurav: Can we see the really big tree from where we are?
Rhu shrugs
Dawn: Nope.
ooc
Rhu: Anywhere but here would be fine by me. Preferably somewhere with hot water and an internet connection.
Dawn: I don't think you're going where you think you're going.
Rhu: ... go on.
Dawn: You're on the wrong planet. Maybe even the wrong universe. Even in layers, the onion is infinite.
But I'm just saying that because I don't actually know. you don't know either, you know.
Isn't it nice not knowing?
Radek: No.
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Radek: And if you want to end up in another universe, I may be able to assist you.
Dawn: No? You want to know it all? You want to... keep knowing?
I don't think you know what you think you want.
Rhu: A city, then. Somewhere with people, not some tiny little village in the middle of nowhere surrounded by charming wizard towers with dragons in them. Somewhere like Arah, maybe. Arah was nice.
Shame about the arch.
And the giant.
Dawn: And the future.
Rhu: And that lady who's house we burned down.
Ellemerr: Sorry, I got a phonecall. >.>
Radek: I could do without knowing many things, but this is a problem I need to solve.
Apheori (GM): I should get an award for worst DM.
Dawn: Oh, alright, then. Just as long as you don't destroy yourself.
Apheori (GM): Dawn almost sounds like she cares. Almost.
Also you get back to the river again. I assume Gravy just walks over it again.
Rhu remembers his dream about being destroyed and shudders.
Frezak (GM): Yep.
Apheori (GM): This time Dawn just copies him and walks over it too.
Does Radek do another bridge or what?
Frezak (GM): How long was it since we last crossed it?
Apheori (GM): Like an hour.
Ganelon: It's a daily.
Ellemerr: Poor Radek.
Apheori (GM): You could also do acrobatics to just use the rocks to walk/jump across.
It has a lot of rocks.
Ganelon: It's not even that good of a daily, I just thought it would be better than some combat thing
Acrobatics would be...
Well, he's an old man.
Frezak (GM): Gravy could just carry people.
He could be.. the ferryman.
Gaurav: Or we could make another whale bridge.
Frezak (GM): I don't want to impose on the druggie.
he might it wrong and give us leeches instead.
*might get it wrong
Bear Soup Guy: Or sea urchins!
Radek just stops at the river's edge and stares down at the water.
Apheori (GM): At the edge it's like 2cm deep.
Most of it is really not very deep, though it does have a bit of current.
Ganelon: Oh, I know.
Gaurav: or we could turn around again and do the treants first.
Radek digs a small sphere out of his things and tosses it into the center of the river.
Ganelon: He uses Runic Resistance, which is a pretty weird power.
But all you really have to know in this case it that the thingy explodes in a burst 1 (so 15ft diameter) and does 2d6+int of an element of my choice.
I choose cold.
Apheori (GM): How cold is it?
Ganelon shrugs.
Ganelon: 2d6+Int cold?
That's an average of about 12 damage.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
It freezes.
You cross?
Ganelon: Yes.
Apheori (GM): Acrobatics to not slip.
Gaurav: Not going to send the guinea pig first?
Ganelon: ...Damn.
Apheori (GM): Yeah, you make it fine.
Ganelon: Well I still thought it was a clever solution.
rolling 1d20+3 Acro
(
16
)
+3
=
19
Apheori (GM): Rhu follows? Greibel? What's Greibel doing?
River water is starting to spill across the ice.
Rhu:
rolling d20+11 acrobatics check to not slip while crossing Radek's Other Bridge
(
14
)
+11
=
25
Apheori (GM): Rhu makes it too.
Gaurav: Hang on. Is Radek's old bridge still around here somewhere? We could have used that.
Apheori (GM): Though it's a lot slicker now.
Ganelon: No, it expires within seconds without his maintenance.
Gaurav: Ah, never mind then.
Rhu is plenty slick himself.
Apheori (GM): Funny.
Ganelon: He could have technically maintained it for the entire hour we spent walking back and forth.
But he did not.
Apheori (GM): Apparently BSG died, so I'ma just say Greibel splashes through the water away from the ice getting as wet as possible.
NEENER.
YOU ALL CONTINUE.
AND GET PLACES.
YES.
Ellemerr: Delightful.
Apheori (GM): Today's episode of getting needlessly lost in the woods brought to you by... uh... deltas in Africa.
Gaurav: Okay, I need to leave now so I don't miss my class! I'll be back in an hour + 10 mins or so if anybody's still around, but if you need Rhu to do anything in the meantime, here is his character sheet: https://www.dropbox.com/s/xjkxvp8qxl5tgoy/Rhu.pdf?dl=0
See you all next time (next Wednesday?)
Apheori (GM): Right, probably.
Ellemerr?
Ellemerr: Yes?
Apheori (GM): When do you need to go?
Ellemerr: In an hour. Ish.
Apheori (GM): Okay, uh, should we just get to the point next time or what? >.>
Ellemerr: It's your summertime making everything wonky.
Apheori (GM): THIS IS NOT SUMMER.
Ganelon: It's daylight savings time being utterly stupid, is what.
Apheori (GM): That.
Ganelon: I hate it enough just by virtue of existing.
Ellemerr: With two players missing, stopping is probably wise.
Ganelon: I didn't even realize that the clocks change on different dates based on your country.
Drastically different ones, apparently.
Frezak (GM): Witches.
Ganelon: I've been an hour early for all of my D&D campaigns for weeks now because of you easterners.
Apheori (GM): Even within the same country it can vary.
Ganelon: UGH.
ENOUGH
SAY NO MORE.
Apheori (GM): And there's even one state here is actually intelligent and doesn't have it.
So, yeah, next week.
Ganelon: See you then.
Bear Soup Guy: I was in the bathroom, sorry!
But yes, next Wednesday should be cool
Gaurav: You've got an hour! You should go on! And I should stop chatting in the middle of lecture. Yes. 

Session 49

Apheori (GM) pokes roll20.
Apheori (GM): Frezak?
Can we start?
Ganelon: Well you got my attention.
Apheori (GM): Is there cake?
Yay!
Apheori (GM) kidnaps Gan.
Apheori (GM): Right, so, we have everyone but Ellemerr.
Gravy was being guide because as it turned out, Greibel was probably going the wrong direction. If you want to believe a 15.
Frezak (GM): We may not be led in the right direction, but at least we're being led with a veneer of confidence.
Ganelon: Misplaced confidence, at that.
Apheori (GM): You are now going eastish through the woods.
I need to find the map/
.
Gaurav: http://wiki.zaori.org/wiki/File:Holes_dorgin_area_map.jpg
Apheori (GM): Huh, you're headed inland.
That means the airship would have been going to/from Rameris or something thatway...
The buckets?
I am so confused.
Gaurav: How close did we get to those hostile trees? I'm imagining them getting all excited to see adventurers and raring for a fight, only to see us turn away and head back the way we came.
Maybe it overshot Dorgin?
Apheori (GM): Uh... like a 20-minute walk away.
Hmm, maybe.
An infestation of lemurs would do that.
Gaurav: o.0
Apheori (GM): Who wants to unlose the party?
Actually, no, Gravy is confident.
Whatever, sorry.
Gravy: Nature.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20+11
(
11
)
+11
=
22
Apheori (GM): Okay.
It probably really is the right direction.
Also you seem to be headed uphill.
Greibel: You sense that really big tree nearby.
The Gravedigger: I sense... a tree.
I speak sooth!
Come, friends.
Apheori (GM): Fine, I guess he did too.
Actually that makes sense.
Frezak (GM): Oops
Apheori (GM): WEIRD NATURE PEOPLE.
Frezak (GM): thought hat we me >.>
Apheori (GM): Eh, it does make sense.
Rhu: _A_ tree?
Gaurav: I assume we're still surrounded by trees here.
Apheori (GM): Oh, and Amadi poofed at some point.
Before this.
In the woods.
Radek: ...This is how I'm going to die, isn't it?
Frezak (GM): Can I roll Prophecy on how Radek will die?
Apheori (GM): You're surrounded. But this one is really big! THE really big one, for Greibel.
Frezak (GM): Or can I just make one?
Bear Soup Guy: Sorry, I was stopped and made to help build a grocery list
Apheori (GM): Uh... sure.
How does that work?
BSG: Tree. Gravy senses it too, apparently.
The Gravedigger: Don't be silly, Radek.
You're going to die at the hands of your second-greatest invention.
Ganelon: Well if the prophecy is supposed to come true, it... doesn't.
Work, that is.
Frezak (GM): Gravy will pat Radek reassuringly.
Apheori (GM): Gravy: I need a d20.
For... reasons.
BSG: You're back, right?
Bear Soup Guy: For the moment
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20
(
6
)
=
6
Bear Soup Guy: I might be bothered a lot by IRL people on and off during today's session unfortunately
But I'll keep coming back
Apheori (GM): Fudge.
I NEED YOU.
Bah.
BSG: You sense a tree. Gravy mentioned it too.
Unless Gravy would go out of his way to talk to a tree?
Frezak (GM): We're here for the Airship, right?
And Radek is grumpy... and would probably want airship...
Apheori (GM): Yeah, basically. Tree just happens to be on the way.
Frezak (GM): So it's probably Airship.
Ganelon: Grumpy is pretty typical.
Bear Soup Guy: I guess Greibel walks to a tree then
Apheori (GM): Look, I need you to go to the tree. I wrote up a bunch of stuff for it like a month ago and I need to use it. BSG was supposed to get you there.
BSG: THE tree?
It's really big. At this point you can't see it, just sense it.
It's big.
Bear Soup Guy: Whatever tree you have stuff written up for
Apheori (GM): Thank you. >.<
Greibel starts walking in a slightly different direction that is only mostly the same direction as Gravy was going.
Rhu: (to Greibel) Oy!
Apheori (GM): Gravy: That's the direction of the tree.
Frezak (GM): I'll just follow Greibel.
HIs turn to lead.
This is a Democracy.
Apheori (GM): Poor Radek.
Rhu continues to follow Gravy as he starts following Greibel.
Ganelon: Don't feel bad for him.
He was about to destroy the world this morning to prove a point.
Apheori (GM): XD
Okay, so the woods abruptly end at a large, shaded clearing.
In the middle of it is this really massive trunk, situated up on a bit of a rise in the middle of the clearing. Overhead are branches, lots and lots of branches, though from here you can't even really see how big the thing actually is.
Basically the other trees are too short to compete with this thing so they just stop in its shade.
The ground is mostly just rocks and crap. Thick roots jut out and over the rocks, even sticking out of the ground where it has eroded around them, forming bridges and walkways up to the trunk itself, several metres in diameter. Roots and trunk alike are covered in rough, mossy bark.
Greibel: There's a presence within the tree, or maybe the tree is the presence. Either way, it seems quite intelligent, and it's watching you. You can go talk to it if you want.
Apheori (GM): It seems to be humming to itself.
Gravy hears the humming too.
Frezak (GM): Gravy hums along and inspects the earth.
Greibel steps up to the tree
Apheori (GM): It's rocky and full of roots, but the dirt itself seems to be quite good. If you could just move the roots, it would be an excellent place to bury things.
Greibel: HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERE'S JOHNNY!
HIT ME WITH YOUR BEST SHOT!
I'VE GOT A PHD IN TREE!
Apheori (GM): The tree actually seems to recoil a bit at this.
Tree: AGH WHAT?
Gaurav: Do we need to bury anything at the mo'?
Frezak (GM): Always be prepared!
Apheori (GM): Also you can all hear the tree.
Frezak (GM): If we need to bury something in a hurry, Gravy would be mortified if he didn't have a spot ready.
Greibel: COME ON MAN. WHAT YOU GOT? YOU WANNA GO?
The Gravedigger: This is quality soil.
Greibel: Nah, I'm just kidding.
Radek: ...
Tree: Go what?
Greibel: I sensed you over back there, you seemed important. What's up?
Radek: So you found a talking tree.
Tree: Ah, bugger man, yeah. I've been found.
Greibel: Yeah. That's druids, man. We find trees. Sorry about that.
Tree: Like nature, what. All prickly and massive.
Dude.
Sorry?
You're not sorry. If you were sorry, it'd be all bugs to me.
Whatcha need?
Greibel: Uh...that's a good question. Give me a second
Dawn: (from a good distance away) Hi tree.
Rhu walks around the tree, trying to figure out where the voice is coming from.
Greibel: (To everyone) Hey, guys! If we hypothetically met a giant tree spirit thing, sentient, intelligent, you know, what would we ask it for?!
Tree: Yo.
The Gravedigger: Does it do wishes, hypothetically?
Apheori (GM): Rhu: Nature.
The Gravedigger: Hello tree.
Rhu:
rolling d20+10 nature check on tree
(
5
)
+10
=
15
Tree: (to Rhu) Oy no poking, what.
Hello, digger.
Gaurav: Rhu will only realise the tree is talking to it if it, like, points at him or looks at him or something.
Apheori (GM): The voice just booms around him.
The Gravedigger: Digger is in the other comic. Call me Gravy.
Apheori (GM): Unless he pokes it after.
Does he poke it after?
Gaurav: Nooo. He will respect the tree's wishes not to be poked, especially as it is much, much taller than him.
Tree: Yeah, man, Gravy.
Dawn: People usually ask for stupid things.
Things like power and truth and stuff that just makes things worse.
Futures.
Radek: (To Greibel) Does it know anything about the holes?
Rhu: Truth! That's a great idea. We could ask it about truth.
Greibel looks back at the tree and shrugs
Dawn gives Rhu a very disappointed look.
Greibel: Holes? What's up with them, right?
Tree: Uuuugh.
Even worse than nature, holes. Tunnel up through your roots, eating away, burning... BURNING.
AGH.
Apheori (GM): Some old leaves flutter down around you.
Radek does not look impressed.
Apheori (GM): And a squirrel falls out of the tree.
Ganelon: The animal or the other kind?
Apheori (GM): Oh, the animal.
Gaurav: Heh, I was just about to do a perception check for wildlife.
Greibel: Hmmm, I hear ya, man.
Dawn: (to the tree) Who are you?
Tree: What does it look like? I'm a treee. Been here ages, you know. Wasn't even a forest back then. Bloody elf buggers.
Apheori (GM): Want to ask it anything else?
Rhu: Have you seen an airship around here anywhere?
Frezak (GM): Dammmit, Rhu!
I was going to ask that!
Tree: With or without dead folk?
Gaurav sticks his tongue out at Frezak
Gaurav: Either. We're not fussy.
The Gravedigger: There's several?
ANd how dead are we talking?
Ooogly woogly walking dead?
Tree: They come, they go. They avoid my branches.
Gaurav: I'll brb, my browser is crapping up >.<
Tree: The dead were moving about, if that's whatcha mean. Like little bugs. Headless and yet still sooo bothersome.
Radek looks up skeptically at the tree.
Radek: How do you perceive anything?
Tree: I gots senses, what.
You're cold and feel like earth.
Gravy is warm and feels like earth.
How do you get along?
The Gravedigger: I have an endless source of jollyness.
Radek: We don't.
Dawn giggles.
Ganelon: Those two answers are probably related.
The Gravedigger flutter lashes at Radek.
Apheori (GM): XD
The Gravedigger: You tease.
Yeah, airship, dead people?
Tree: Beetles, I see.
The Gravedigger hefts shovel.
Tree: Yeah, maaan.
The Gravedigger: ..
This isn't a threatening gesture, I was thinking about the dead people.
Tree: They went smash.
Apheori (GM): Gravy: You get a sense of the direction as the tree says it, with a vague memory of an airship shape and stuff crashing into a bunch of smaller trees.
The Gravedigger: Sweet.
Apheori (GM): At the same time, there's a bit of a crashing in the branches above.
The Gravedigger: Anything we can do for you while we're here?
Rhu: Are you guys, like, a species or something? We saw a giant tree next to a Hole earlier, but it seemed to be dead. Er, like two hundred years ago on the other side of this planet. Or something.
Apheori (GM): This time Squirrel falls out of the tree.
Frezak (GM): Back in 10 minutes.
Squirrel bounces up, squeealing happily, and then just runs off into the rest of the trees.
Apheori (GM): Radek: You're like 90% sure that didn't actually just happen.
Greibel looks on for a moment
Greibel: Fun girl.
Ganelon: 90% is a pretty good probability.
I'll go with it.
Apheori (GM): Okay, I'ma answer Rhu and Gravy and then... er... do something I should have done already.
Tree: (to Gravy) Naw, man, don't do it. You'll dig too far and it'll get out this time.
(to Rhu) Trees, man.
Apheori (GM): Those 'man's should have been dudes.
And I'll be right back.
Gaurav: One of these days I need to play a D&D character who's hard of hearing. And see how long it takes my party to kill me.
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Apheori (GM): Greibel, Gravy: The tree actually seems to be quite happy just talking to you. You get the impression it's a bit lonely.
But only a small bit.
Gaurav: What, with squirrels and Squirrel in its hair?
Apheori (GM): I'm not sure those do much to help anything.
The Gravedigger: Hey, if you could make a platform thing with some branches, maybe Airships would stop by on their way past.
Tree: Hmmmm.
Apheori (GM): There's something of a shuffling really high up.
Tree: Maaaaybe.
The Gravedigger: Just a thought. I we see living airship people we'll suggest it.
Tree: Coool, man.
The Gravedigger: Everyone good to go poke around this ariship, then?
Raaaaadek?
Apheori (GM): There's another crashing in the branches above. This time the tree actually seems to notice.
Frezak (GM): Leaning in a swervy fashion towards the grump.
Tree: Whaaaat?
Radek crosses his arms.
Tree: There is a horrible WHOMP as two large figures crash into the ground at high speed, one propelled downward by the other, and taking the brunt of the impact as a result. A cloud of dirt and leaves is thrown outward.
Apheori (GM): Er, ooc.
Frezak (GM): Wyverns!
Apheori (GM): A moment later, branches shower down around everyone, especially the two figures.
Radek narrowly dodges one.
A branch, that is.
Ganelon: Wretched nature!
Apheori (GM): Rhu, on the other hand, dodges right into a branch and gets clonked on the head.
Ganelon: How dare it fall on me!
Tree: Man, watch it, will you?
Frezak (GM): I cover Radek with my shield.
Apheori (GM): This seems to be directed at the figures, not you guys.
Gaurav: Heeeee.
Perfect. Can Rhu be knocked unconscious? How much damage?
Apheori (GM): 7 damage, and if you want.
Rhu points in a few random directions, including upwards, then says "Blarble!" with some gusto before falling over backwards.
Frezak (GM): I'll poke Rhu to see if he's alive.
Ellemerr: O_o
Apheori (GM): As everything stops falling down, Amadi randomly appears.
Rhu seems to be fine.
And the two figures who just fell out of the sky are doing stuff too, apparently completely oblivious to the damage they caused.
Ganelon: Well, what stuff are they doing?
Amadi brushes some twigs and leaves out of her hair. They are distinctly different from the leaves this tree (or Tree, even) has got.
Apheori (GM): Moment.
Rhu opens his eyes, but chooses to remain on the ground until the world stops spinning.
Gaurav: This is clearly not a good place to be flying around. Airships, large figures, everything's falling out of the sky these days.
Apheori (GM): Oh gods this is tacky.
The top figure, a masked woman dressed all in grey, gets up slowly, her foot rather firmly planted on the other's chest.
The other one just looks ridiculous. It's got gleaming bits sticking out all over, and geometric holes through it in odd locations, and entirely too many limbs, and too much colour. Some parts are like windows into the cosmos, revealing starfields and more, while others are just unreal. It's all a bit beat up at this point, however, full of twigs and covered in dirt, and leaves, and a bit of what might be blood.
Ridiculous-looking figure: You can't do this.
Grey figure: I have made my position known, and I have sued for peace, and still you have persisted. Relent. End your futile struggle. Relent.
Apheori (GM): Any interest in interrupting this?
Frezak (GM): Nope.
(From Ellemerr): Do I know any of 'em?
Frezak (GM): Well, Gravy will wander up and loom in an interested fashion.
Gaurav: Nope.
Ganelon: Sounds like that might even be illegal.
Frezak (GM): In that Gravy is unable to not loom.
Ganelon: I'd like to try to uh... identify the ridiculous one?
Gaurav: How large are these large figures?
(To Ellemerr): The top one is Kyrule, god of death, and the bottom on is Djieka, god of chaos and luck.
Ganelon: What the hell is it?
Amadi tries to look inconspicuous somewhere behind Gravy.
Apheori (GM): They're a bit bigger than Gravy. The grey one might be about meter taller, and the other one... er... is a bit too ridiculous to tell.
How do you identify things in D&D?
Ganelon: Skills, but if this isn't something that would be documented, either as a species or phenomenon or legend, etc, then you can just say it's not possible to know what it is.
Gaurav: Greibel identified the women-made-of-weasels (?) before any of us did; we could get him to look at these peeps and see what he says.
Rhu can check for any religious angle on these peeps if that seems useful.
Ganelon: ...And hope it's not something like "Whoa. Far Out."?
Gaurav: And there's always Gravyvision.
Hahaha.
Apheori (GM): BSG: You around?
Gaurav: "Oh my god, it's full of stars!"
Apheori (GM): Radek: You're reasonably sure it's some kind of god.
Nothing else would be that... excessive.
Ganelon: And it's gettin' beat up?
Apheori (GM): Yup.
Ganelon: Then hell no he's not interrupting.
Gaurav: Oh huh.
Tell Rhu that so he can religion check it or something.
Ridiculous-looking figure: I will not relent! Not to you!
Apheori (GM): The grey one looks down on him in utter disappointment.
Grey figure: You fool.
Ganelon: I shouldn't need to. If religion as a skill would allow you to know what god this is, your character doesn't need outside knowledge to think it's a god.
Because succeeding on the skill means Rhu would recognize it on his own.
Apheori (GM): She kneels down on top of him, and he tries to pull away, but he's pinned, half-buried already from the force of the impact, and held down, for she is far bigger, far more real, pressing him to the earth.
She curls her fingers on his chest, and half-whispers:
Grey figure: One last chance. Relent.
The Gravedigger: 'scuse me.
You guys gods?
Amadi whimpers a little from behind Gravy.
The Gravedigger: Because I had some questions.
Apheori (GM): She looks up slowly and holds up a finger in Gravy's direction.
Grey figure: A moment, please.
The Gravedigger: Okay.
Apheori (GM): And Rhu, go ahead and religion them if you want.
Rhu gets up and, dusting himself off, walks towards Gravy.
Rhu:
rolling d20+10 religion check against the gods
(
7
)
+10
=
17
Apheori (GM) almost falls out of her chair laughing.
Apheori (GM): Grey one is probably Kyrule. You have no idea about the other one, probably never even heard of it.
Rhu: (to everybody) I think the grey one is Kyrule. Hazz' said he might know about the Holes or something. (to Amadi) And you've talked about him from time to ... you okay? Why are you whimpering?
Ellemerr: brb
Amadi makes sushing motions and pretends she's not there.
Apheori (GM): Meanwhile Kyrule turns her full attention back on the other one and demands that he relent again.
He doesn't answer.
Ganelon: Hazz wanted you to beat Kyrule over the head at one point, apparently.
This might be an excellent, or terrible, opportunity to do that.
Ellemerr: Yep. Probably a bit of both.
Apheori (GM) giggles.
Gaurav: Not while she's busy crushing another god into the ground, I don't think. I'll wait until after she speaks with Gravy.
God to god.
Dawn: (to Rhu) We're not here, okay? Not here.
Apheori (GM): Dawn is also hiding behind Gravy.
Frezak (GM): Might not be the best place given that he's right next to these people.
Apheori (GM): Yeah, well, he's big.
Ellemerr: But he's so nice and - yeah, that.
Gaurav: There is a giant tree to hide behind or climb up if they like.
Apheori (GM): Let's just say these two didn't get away when they had the chance the last time; I don't see them likely being any more sensible this time.
Ellemerr: Might be more of these up there. Gravy's familiar and safe.
Apheori (GM): Though maybe they are.
He is.
Kyrule: (to the guy) Then I shall have your heart. All of your joy, your hope, your worth, everything that makes you who and what you are, will be taken. Even your light. And your life.
Ridiculous-looking figure: No!
The Gravedigger: That sounds pretty mean.
Are you the bad guy?
I'm only asking because I might have to interrupt.
Apheori (GM): She ignores Gravy and draws a strange, brilliant light out of the ridiculous-looking one's chest and it forms a bit of a ball in her hand. As she does so, he almost seems to come up with it, fighting, trying to get it back, until she pulls it too far away and he falls back, not moving, his colour faded, his reality... lessened.
Gaurav: That sounds ... extreme.
Kyrule: And you will have nothing.
Amadi tries to really not be there.
The Gravedigger: I'm gonna be honest. You don't seem like a very nice entity.
Dawn clings to Amadi.
Kyrule: I'm not.
The Gravedigger shrugs.
The Gravedigger: At least you're honest about it.
So what was that all about, then?
Kyrule takes the light, now cupping it in both hands, and presses it to her own chest, and it disappears.
Kyrule rises slowly, focusing on nothing in particular, before finally turning to Gravy.
The Gravedigger: Me waves.
Frezak (GM): oops
The Gravedigger waves
Kyrule: He thought to oppose me, blind to the consequences, the devastation that an all out war would cause. Most of the gods understood, but only most.
For those who would not relent, I could only show them that there will be other consequences, more personal, more close to home.
Fools.
The Gravedigger: You sound like the grump.
Radek: Don't you think that there are greater concerns at the moment than punishing dissidents?
The Gravedigger: No offense, grump.
Radek: Or is the unraveling of the dimensions somehow beneath you?
The Gravedigger whispers to Radek. "You mean that morally rather than spatially, right?"
Kyrule: Always. Which is why their dissidence could not be allowed to continue.
Kyrule walks around Gravedigger and peers behind him at the midgets.
The Gravedigger rotates to hide the midgets.
Ellemerr: The midgets rotate with him, of course.
Frezak (GM): The midgets that are probably peering around him.
Apheori (GM): She's too tall to actually stop her, unless you... I don't even know.
Frezak (GM): I lean backwards.
Ellemerr: xD
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Ganelon: Flawless.
Frezak (GM): SO they can hide under and behind.
Apheori (GM): She leans over too.
Gaurav: Hee.
Frezak (GM): Unless she curves like a noodle, they should be shielded.
Rhu: Um, excuse me, Your ... Godliness. My god Hazz'ridan the All-End asked me to speak with you.
Apheori (GM): Yeah, pretty much.
She stops and then back away a bit.
Dawn leans out and makes shooing gestures with her hands.
Ellemerr: Lemme know when/if Amadi is spotted so thoroughly that there's no further point in hiding.
Frezak (GM): Gravy gives her a friendly beam to bluff that it's just coincidental that he felt like pivoting and bending backwards.
Apheori (GM): Oh blimey.
Rhu: He thought you might be able to help with these ... Holes? Big creepy crack in reality spewing zombies?
The Gravedigger: Zombies!
Shadow stuff.
Also a beach, I think.
Ganelon: I missed my chance to actually add this at the right time, but Radek would answer Gravy's question.
Rhu: Yes! That too.
Ganelon: "I do not."
Frezak (GM): You could pretend you spent all that time thinking about.
Gravitas.
Apheori (GM): Agh, crap, did I even write this part? It was a huge-arse part. >.<
Ganelon: No, he'd be pretty quick to deny caring about the moral decay of the universe.
Kyrule: And your Hazz'ridan could not even bring this up himself, not now, not in the beginning, not ever?
He is not one you should be following, certainly not regarding this.
Gaurav: If Rhu has Kyrule's attention now, he'll step around her so that her back is towards Gravy and the midgets.
Radek mutters to Gravy.
Radek: ...Do you think he'll finally listen now that a god's said it?
The Gravedigger: No.
Religious people don't listen.
That's how they manage to keep it up.
Apheori (GM): She doesn't bother to keep facing Rhu, and smiles slightly at what Gravy said.
Rhu: He can't help us as much as he'd like. We need to fix these Holes ourself.
Apheori (GM): You aren't wrong. The Rifts need to be closed.
Unfortunately, where he won't act because the rifts serve his interests, I cannot act.
Tree said that.
Tree: AGH.
Ellemerr: xD
Apheori (GM): THAT WAS KYRULE.
Rhu: His interests?
Apheori (GM): NOT THE TREE.
NOT HEM.
ME.
Ellemerr: It's a tough world, dear.
Apheori (GM): >.>
Yes.
The Gravedigger: Hey, Tree? What do you think of this ladypersonthing?
Rhu: Anyway, yes, we are attempting to close the Holes. We closed one just a few days ago, but then our shadows came to life and tried to kill us and stuff.
Well, he did. (points towards Radek)
Apheori (GM): Agh, I can't even keep up with this.
Is this what you do in real conversations, keep piling stuff on so people can't respond to any one of the things? >.>
Radek just rolls his eyes at Kyrule's statement. In a "of course you can't", sort of way.
Ganelon: Nah, this happens a lot.
Frezak (GM): Yes.
Ganelon: In online TTRPG conversations.
Apheori (GM): Heh. >.<
Ganelon: Generally I just try to maintain the etiquette to not type when I can see someone else is (who is in the same conversation as my character).
Note that when you're doing /me, however, it shows up as you (the player) typing to others.
It used to not show up at all, which caused all kinds of confusion.
Now it just causes diminished amounts of confusion.
Apheori (GM): Okay, I'm just going to ignore everything Rhu said after the first bit.
He didn't actually say that.
Bad Gaurav.
Frezak (GM): O.o
Apheori (GM): Becuase he'd wait, presumeably.
Gaurav: Sure.
Apheori (GM): OKAY.
Kyrule: His goal is to spread, through whatever means possible. He is as a plague upon the named realms, spreading through and beyond, and where rifts in the fabric of the realms arise, he uses and propagates them further.
Tree: (to Gravy) Seems a little different from before, but she's all good, man.
Done something with her hair.
The Gravedigger: Sweet. Thanks, tree.
Kyrule: (to the tree) Hey Vivek.
Tree: Hey yourself. What's up, man?
Apheori (GM): Rhu: Continue your conversation or get back to the point. >.>
Gaurav: Hee, thanks!
Kyrule: Oh, you know how it is. You die horribly, you put on a new face, you wonder where it all went wrong...
Tree: Oh, no, no idea what you're talking about. No idea at all.
Rhu: We're trying to close those rifts. I think he's mostly supportive of this goal.
Assuming those Holes are also rifts, I guess. I don't know if I actually know what we're doing.
Kyrule: Perhaps.
Rhu: Are there others out there, trying to close the Holes?
Apheori (GM): She ignores Rhu and looks around for anyone smarter.
Radek: None. They're too busy dismissing my theories.
Radek gives Gravy a sharp glare.
Ganelon: Uh oh.
I was just trying to be snappy but now I've just drawn attention to myself, haven't I?
Apheori (GM): Dun dun dun.
I'll be right back.
I'm really bad at this, I'm sorry.
Ganelon: Quoth the tree: "It's cool, dude."
Apheori (GM): Eh, Kyrule should have just ignored Rhu from the start. It would have avoided so many problems.
Ganelon: Poor Rhu.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: Feel free to continue to do whatever. Even if she ignores you, your party members needn't and all that.
Gaurav: Will do!
Kyrule: (to Radek) Your theories are largely correct, but unfortunately the rifts and thinnies are but small symptoms of the overall problem.
Radek: I wasn't waiting for your validation, but by all means, continue.
Ganelon: That's uh... for the record, not him being smug or anything.
Rather, he's not so disdainful of the divine that he'll outright sabotage his own efforts to gather information.
Kyrule: The universe grows thin. It is old and tired, and all the fighting of the worlds simply weakens it further.
Radek: ...
The Gravedigger: That's cheery.
Ganelon: She's saying that the expansion of the universe is fucking everything up?
I have to IMPLODE THE UNIVERSE to fix this?
Apheori (GM): I think she's saying it's idiots with magic that's doing it.
Ganelon: Oh.
Apheori (GM): But that doesn't mean your conclusion was necessarily wrong.
Apheori (GM) grins.
Gaurav: Destroy the universe to save it. It's the only way.
Apheori (GM): Your companion wasn't wrong. I should be fixing this.
But Kyrule as Kyrule does not know how. He was not given that knowledge when he was named, for to do so would only have broken his mind. He must learn on his own, and that is no easy task. I've only seen it done once before, and it took many tries before that succeeded, and great cost.
Kyrule: Your companion wasn't wrong. I should be fixing this.
But Kyrule as Kyrule does not know how. He was not given that knowledge when he was named, for to do so would only have broken his mind. He must learn on his own, and that is no easy task. I've only seen it done once before, and it took many tries before that succeeded, and great cost.
Kyrule grumps.
Apheori (GM): Dammit.
YOU KNOW WHAT I MEANT.
The Gravedigger: Soooo.... Dimensional spackle won't cut it?
Rhu: (to Kyrule) Might ... Hazz'ridan have that knowledge?
Radek: You'll need to forgive me for refusing to wait patiently for Kyrule to come upon a solution without assistance.
To affect change on this scale seems to be impossible, however. I am outnumbered astronomically by the presence of counter-productive fools.
Kyrule: (to Radek) Good. Just please, as with this morning, try to restrain yourself when things go ill - the more damage is done, the worse the overall situation will become.
Those fools need not incite you to become equally foolish.
The Gravedigger: Seeeee?
Apheori (GM): I want Greibel.
The Gravedigger: I told you it was a bad idea to shatter the universe!
Apheori (GM): Hmph.
Bear Soup Guy: huh?
Apheori (GM): Hi.
Your party members are talking to another god.
Anything to chime in?
Radek: Hmph.
Bear Soup Guy: I haven't got the foggiest understanding of any of this
Radek: It could have served to persuade him.
Bear Soup Guy: So I doubt Greibel has either :P
Apheori (GM): Fine, then ask her about petunias or something.
Greibel: HEY LADY!
HEY! HEY! HEY LADY! HEY NICE LADY!
Greibel jumps up and down pointing at himself
Greibel: WOOP WOOP!
Kyrule: Um... yes?
Greibel: What is your favorite salad?
Kyrule takes off her mask and gives Greibel a long look.
Greibel strikes a pose
Ellemerr: xD
Ganelon: Like a superhero pose? A fashion model pose?
A... Michael Jackson pose?
Greibel: Sort of a mock-handsome-model pose
Oh right the fashion model one
Bear Soup Guy: err
OOC
Gaurav: What sort of mask is Kyrule wearing? What does she look like without it?
Kyrule: Caesar salad, I suppose.
Greibel: Oooooooo, excellent choice.
Mine's POTATO SALAD! BOINK!
Greibel throws a potato at Kyrule
Apheori (GM): That mask from the wiki, except in mirrored silver, and without it she looks... uh, like someone not wearing a mask.
Fairly normal, kind of pretty?
Kyrule catches the potato and then looks at it like it's a bit unusual.
Greibel grins knowingly
Bear Soup Guy: This is all part of his plan that he hasn't thought of yet
And he probably never will
Frezak (GM): That's the best kind of plan!
Radek: ...As I said, counter-productive fools.
Ganelon: Personally I approve wholeheartedly of Greibel's cunning sceme.
SCHEME
Ugh.
Kyrule approves too. Silently. Invisibly.
Amadi loves the scheme and would normally help, but is still in hiding.
Rhu: (to Kyrule, knowing full well that she'll ignore him) Can you help us with any of this? I think we're looking for Holes to experiment on, or other ... smart people who can help.
Apheori (GM): Amadi: She probably saw you, but just pretended not to.
Radek: That would be useful, yes.
Amadi is fine with the continued pretension.
Radek: If... hrm.
Ganelon: He's just gonna start thinking to himself.
Reversing the expansion of the universe requires a lot of power! Probably more than he can bring to bear.
Kyrule: (to Radek) Your research has made consiserable strides already. The question is, what do you intend to do with it?
Ganelon: But then I remembered, we have a not-shovel of immense power.
Apheori (GM): You actually have it?
Frezak (GM): UH-HUH
Apheori (GM): Oh blimey.
Ganelon: Okay, KNOWLEDGE OF one.
Frezak (GM): In our grasp.
Metaphorically.
Ganelon: It might be worth looking into getting it in our grasp literally.
Frezak (GM): Yesssssss
Radek: What else? I have to correct this monumental blunder before it's too late.
Kyrule: All of it? Everything?
Do you intend to fix everything, every hole, every tear, every thin spot in the entirety of the fabric of the universe? And when the one is finished, what of the others? Will you move on, universe to universe, until all of the multiverse is solid and absolute, no more holes, no more uncertainty, no more variance in the possibilities that face those within? What then, when you are unto, nay, beyond a god yourself? What will you do but continue as you always have, without reason, only a purpose that has outlived any need? Is this what you want?
When do you stop?
The Gravedigger: If you're going to do a job, you do it right.
Or until you're tired and feel like a nap.
Ganelon: Just a sec.
Kyrule: That works with burying things. Not so much with purpose, or reason.
Have you ever buried a god?
The Gravedigger: Not yet!
That I know of.
I did a dragon the other day.
Radek: ...Why should I stop?
The Gravedigger: Because if you remove all variance in the world it would be sad and boring, you boob.
Apheori (GM): I love Gravy.
Radek: The nature of progress is infinite. I can always find a direction to advance in - even the search itself is progress.
I will never need to stop.
Apheori (GM): Gods don't stay buried. That makes it work, because for something that big to simply stay put indefinitely would take a piece of the world away, removed, nonexistent.
Kyrule: Gods don't stay buried. That makes it work, because for something that big to simply stay put indefinitely would take a piece of the world away, removed, nonexistent.
Progress shouldn't stay buried either, but if you close it up, remove the opportunities, it loses its potential. It is no longer infinite.
Tree: Just don't go burying anything in my roots, 'kay?
The Gravedigger: No probs, Tree.
Apheori (GM): Also I should point out that there is a god corpse on the ground behind Kyrule. Probably in need of burial.
Radek waves his hand dismissively.
Radek: If I can reverse the expansion of the universe, I can encourage it as well. The flaws that have led to this catastrophe may yet be corrected.
Ganelon: If he ever achieves so much power that he can do this, why not just fix the universe so it can be all diverse and yet not get holes torn all over it in the process?
Kyrule: To find that balance is a hard problem, and why we are in this situation in the first place.
How do you know you will know when to reverse the process back, when you cannot see it with an absolute eye?
Apheori (GM): Heeee.
Ask her that. >.>
Amadi makes a disdainful snort from behind Gravy, forgetting for a moment that she's "not there".
Gaurav: Now I want an absolute eye.
Ellemerr: Here, take mine. It's been creeping me out anyway.
Kyrule tries walking around Gravy again, this time going the other direction.
The Gravedigger pivots amiably.
Kyrule: You still dig holes, yes?
Gaurav takes Ellemerr's absolute eye and adds it to his inventory.
Gaurav: Thanks, Ellemerr!
Ellemerr: You're welcome, I guess.
The Gravedigger: Yep.
Tree: Dude, not in my roots you don't.
The Gravedigger: 's cool, Tree. Chill out.
Kyrule: Bury things?
Tree: As long as it's not in my roots.
The Gravedigger: Yep.
Kyrule: (indicating the dead ridiculous guy) Would you like to bury a god?
Ganelon: WOULD I!?
The Gravedigger is silent for a while.
The Gravedigger stares at the dirt and the stars.
The Gravedigger: Yes.
But first I must hide my mmm-----aaaarigolds?
Gaurav: Hee.
Kyrule: Just as long as it's not petunias. I don't think we could take it if it were petunias.
Ellemerr: brb
(To Ellemerr): This is relevant because the last thing she said before he killed her was "I'm turning into a bowl of petunias."
The Gravedigger starts shuffling backwards slowly.
(To Ellemerr): You're a bowl of petunias. Or a petunia. Or something.
Radek: ...What's wrong with him?
Kyrule tries to keep a straight face.
Kyrule: He needs to hide his... marigolds. From me. For reasons.
I can see right through you, you know!
Frezak (GM): I want to get to the treeline that I may hide my... flowers.
Apheori (GM): I don't think anyone stops you.
Frezak (GM): Hide behind a tree and shout "JUST PUTTING AWAY MY... UH... FLOWERS. YES SIRREE."
Rhu: Why petunias? Why not petunias?
rolling d20+10 religion check significance of petunias
(
8
)
+10
=
18
Apheori (GM): You have no idea.
The Gravedigger: Okay, tree, where's a good place for me to bury this here god?
Tree: Hmmmmm.
How about...
Tree shuffles a bunch of roots around, finally making a space for a grave a bit off to the side.
Tree: Here.
The Gravedigger: Great.
The Gravedigger pulls up imaginary sleeves.
The Gravedigger: Let's do this!
Frezak (GM): And hums the tree song.
Apheori (GM): Gravy digs a hole and stuff. Anyone else doing anything? Is Ellemerr back yet?
Ellemerr: I am now!
(From Ellemerr): And that's awesome. xD
Ganelon: Radek's just going to think about how he could possibly experiment on these things under controlled circumstances.
(To Ellemerr): It's particularly funny because the real Kyrule didn't even get the reference.
Ganelon: You know, rather than just winging it and hoping it works on the entire universe.
Like "hmm... perhaps I could first create a miniverse..."
Gaurav: Given that we are looking for the airship to get out of the Dorgin area, we could ask Kyrule to transport us somewhere or something. If we have somewhere we want to go. Maybe back to Coffle?
(To Ellemerr): Whereas this one did and then some.
Ganelon: We just came from Coffle, though.
Why go back?
Gaurav: There's a Hole near it to experiment on.
Apheori (GM): While Gravy's digging and the midgets are stowed, Kyrule seems to address Radek. For some reason she's looking at Greibel, however.
Gaurav: And wizards, and a doorway to Arah, and all the town guards you could ever want.
(From Ellemerr): Awesome. Yuss.
Kyrule: Your process for closing the rifts. Would you be willing to give a demonstration?
Apheori (GM): Is Greibel doing anything weird?
Gaurav: Almost certainly.
Bear Soup Guy: ^
Making faces.
Gaurav: Ha!
Bear Soup Guy: Stretching the skin out on the sides of his face with his hands.
Pulling the porridge over his face like a beekeeper's mask
Apheori (GM): Okay, this explains a thing or two.
Radek: Of course.
Radek is looking at Greibel too, since it seems like the topical thing to be doing at the moment.
Radek: It is only recently tested, however. I cannot guarantee a consistent result after only a single trial.
Kyrule: Of course.
Even if it should fail, however, it should give me the data needed to run comprehensive tests.
Apheori (GM): Meanwhile, behind a random tree at the edge of the forest, Dawn and Amadi are hiding. Yes?
Radek glances at Kyrule curiously for a moment.
Ellemerr: Yes.
Ganelon: So this was the god you mentioned, huh?
That might actually get along with him.
Apheori (GM): Maybe. Who even knows.
Unless you do.
Radek: Do you know where I could find a rift to close, then?
If opening one is unacceptable.
Kyrule: I have just a one in mind.
Apheori (GM): Midgets.
Um... Ellemerr!
Ellemerr: Yes?
Apheori (GM): Squirrel drops out of of your tree, grinning.
Amadi makes alternatively shooing and shushing motions.
Squirrel takes Amadi's and Dawn's hands and tries to make them dance with her.
Amadi tries to hit Squirrel over the head with a spatula with her other hand.
Squirrel lets go and dances away, pulled Dawn out into the clearing.
Squirrel: pulling*
Amadi watches fretfully from behind the tree.
Dawn tries to grab Amadi instead in order to not be pulled.
Amadi hands Dawn the spatula.
Dawn uses the spatula on Squirrel, and Squirrel finally just lets go and runs out on her own.
Ganelon: Nice teamwork.
Squirrel runs up to Kyrule and then just stares up at her, grinning.
Amadi keeps watching apprehensively.
Dawn does the same thing, poking her head around the tree over Amadi's.
Kyrule sighs heavily.
Ganelon: It's like staring into a mirror.
Kyrule picks up Squirrel and walks over to the tree with Amadi and Dawn behind it.
Ganelon: Except they're not scared of me!
Apheori (GM): Gravy: Hole's dug, but you can't seem to get the dead god to move. It's really heavy or something.
Amadi meeps and backs away around the tree.
Frezak (GM): I peer around to see if anyone is looking at me.
Ellemerr: I know Amadi's distracted. >.>
All the midgets are.
Frezak (GM): THen I'll try and grab hold of space. And scrunch up the bits between the god and the hole to get it there without moving it.
I can do that, right?
Right?
Ellemerr: xD
Apheori (GM): Uh... d20.
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20
(
8
)
=
8
Apheori (GM): Apparently you can't.
Frezak (GM): Gravy will sigh.
The Gravedigger: um, 'scuse me.
Help with this thing?
Apheori (GM): While Amadi backs away, Dawn just stands there.
The Gravedigger boots the godcorpse.
Apheori (GM): Kyrule'll give you a hand in a moment.
Unless you want to interrupt the midget harassment.
Your marigolds have been found, and have been joined by another, bright red one.
The Gravedigger: OH GOSH GOD MIDGETS
WHERE DID THEY COME FROM
Rhu walks over to Gravy to help with the god corpse.
Frezak (GM): That's a point, Rhu IS godly.
Gaurav: Godly how?
All the gods ignore him.
Ganelon: Does that mean the corpse just goes right through his hands?
Kyrule follows Amadi around the tree.
Gaurav: Hah! That would make sense.
Apheori (GM): And then drops Squirrel in front of her.
Amadi gives up on hiding and pretends she hasn't noticed Kyrule at all until now.
Amadi: Oh, Kyrule! Hello; I didn't see you there. It's been much too long. I trust you've been well?
Dawn: Oh, um, hello.
Amadi still backs away, trying to make it inconspicuous, trying to get closer to Gravy. Whether he's able to help of not, he's at least very nice to have around.
Kyrule just leaves you guys with Squirrel and goes back to Gravy.
Apheori (GM): So much awkward.
Amadi looks a little surprised. That went way better than she'd thought.
Apheori (GM): Squirrel runs after her.
Kyrule hands Gravy a scythe, picks up Squirrel again, and then just holds her up to her face, glaring.
Dawn: (to Amadi) I guess it's all right, then?
Frezak (GM): I'll... examine the scythe?
Dawn: He did say he was sorry before.
Frezak (GM): Waggle it around a bit.
Amadi: He did?
Apheori (GM): The scythe is large, black, a bit fancy, and feels very, very dangerous, like if you used it wrong it could probably cut through reality itself.
Kyrule: Hook him with that; it'll move him.
Gaurav: Is it the same sort of black as the dagger we picked up earlier?
Apheori (GM): Similar.
Sort of.
Frezak (GM): I'll hook the corpse and drag it.
Meathook!
Apheori (GM): Guarave: And yes, this is the same scythe I was telling you about yesterday. >.>
Hah.
You drag the corpse to the grave.
Dawn: He did.
Amadi: Oh.
Who?
Dawn: Kyrule. Fred. Him.
Dawn points.
Gaurav: Good lord.
Dawn: Her?
Amadi: Oh!
He did?
When?
Dawn: I think he did. You weren't there.
Amadi: Oh...
Huh.
Where was I?
Dawn: Dreaming.
Amadi: Well, duh.
Dawn: But not the first time.
The first time you were dying. We all were.
Amadi nods.
Dawn: I'm remembering.
Amadi shudders.
Amadi: ... Much?
... All?
Dawn nods, looking scared.
Amadi looks scared too.
Apheori (GM): Gravy buries the dead god. Then what?
And yes, Rhu's hand did go right through it.
Gaurav: Eeks.
Rhu will pick up a stone to make sure it's the god that's insubstantial, not him.
Apheori (GM): The stone bounces off it.
Frezak (GM): You're a hairy ghost.
Apheori (GM): Kyrule tells you that it's not you, but your faith.
Rhu: My faith?
Gaurav: Rhu the Hairy Ghost. I like the sound of that.
Kyrule: Yes.
Rhu: ... my lack of faith, you mean.
Kyrule: You have faith, though it has been twisted and broken by the trials you have gone through.
(holding up Squirrel) Tell me, do you want this one?
Ganelon: "Want" might not be the most apt choice of word.
Squirrel cackles and squirms.
Rhu: That's a new one. We've only met her once before.
Hazz'ridan said that they were keys, but I'm not sure he included that one. But I think he included the one that was the skull, but we lost that in midnight.
Amadi: She's included.
Amadi adds in a mutter,
Amadi: Like it or not.
Kyrule: He thought to use her pieces to patch the holes? That is low, even for him.
Frezak (GM): Hells, right, Radek!
Ask the nice lady about your toy.
Apheori (GM): Actually scratch that she didn't say that.
I TAKE IT BACK.
Ellemerr: O_o
Apheori (GM): Kyrule just gives Rhu a disgusted look.
Ellemerr eats the words.
Apheori (GM): Kyrule's words, I meant.
Why would you eat them?
Ellemerr: Yep.
Apheori (GM): Oh, okay.
WELL THEN.
Thank you.
Ellemerr: You're welcome! They taste a bit funny.
Apheori (GM): Yeah, Kyrule's supposed to be playing nice with Hazz'ridan right now.
Even if she does kind of really hate him.
Ellemerr: Amadi could say it! If she knew it.
Amadi has no problem with insulting Hazz. None whatsoever.
Apheori (GM): Unfortunately she doesn't.
And neither is Kyrule supposed to know, which is the problem, which is why she has to play nice, which... er.
Ganelon: Er.
Which toy is this?
Apheori (GM): So nobody wants squirrel, right?
Ganelon: The one that stalks?
Frezak (GM): THe thing with the rock keys.
That we fixed with scraps of foil.
Ganelon: Oh, that. That's more a puzzle.
Yeah, alright.
Ellemerr: Amadi might want Squirrel, I guess. I'm not sure.
Also I have to go sleep soon. I'll get a toothbrush.
Not NOW, but soon. Soooooon.
Apheori (GM): Kyrule tells squirrel to go back to her dream, and the midget poofs.
Radek gives Squirrel a concerned look.
Radek: Is she... necessary?
Gaurav: Didn't she kick a ton of ass back when Amadi took her to meet the little old lady who wouldn't give her her lollipop?
Kyrule: No.
Ask the key if you need her.
Apheori (GM): (The key seems to mean Amadi.)
Radek: Good, good...
The Gravedigger: This.
Is one sweet grave.
If I do say so myself.
Radek digs the puzzle out of his bag of things.
Ellemerr: And yeah, Gaurav, Squirrel can be awesome. But she can also be a lot of other things.
Radek: Since you seem to be rather helpful for a god... would you have any insights into this device?
I haven't taken much time to study it. I've been busy with other things.
Ganelon: Like getting lost in the forest.
Kyrule: I'm afraid I couldn't tell you much about it. According to history, its creation and destruction never happened, and for that alone it may be worth study.
Gaurav: Huh.
Radek: ...Fascinating.
While functional, it lacks pieces. I cannot say how many.
Kyrule: To find out, you may need to consider how to examine pieces of the universe that no longer exist in the universe.
Radek: ...I'd rather not displace myself from the universe a second time.
Kyrule: Indeed.
Apheori (GM): You all ready to go to a hole?
Ganelon: I'm ready.
Although the Merr's ready to fall asleep, I think.
Apheori (GM): Yups.
Ellemerr: Yep. >.>
Apheori (GM): This makes a good transition, methinks.
The Gravedigger wanders up.
The Gravedigger: Hey guys. I buried a god. What did YOU do today?
Kyrule: (to Gravy) It is a good grave.
The Gravedigger beams.
Apheori (GM): Do you give her back the scythe?
Frezak (GM): Of course.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Frezak (GM): I DO want to memorise how it feels.
Holding the power to slice through a reality.
I may need that later.
Apheori (GM): It feels a little bit like the shovel should.
Frezak (GM): Hmmmmmm.
Kyrule: The hole awaits. Are you all ready?
Ellemerr: Right. Sweet nightmares.
Kyrule: She motions everyone, including midgets, to come over and crap and... uh...
Apheori (GM): ooc
And next time you shall go hole.
HOLE.
With a god.
Apheori (GM) sniggers.
Gaurav: >.<
I wonder what's going to possess Amadi _this_ time.
Ganelon: Hole's a direction.
Gaurav: True.
Ganelon: See you later, folks.
Bear Soup Guy: Adios, all
Gaurav: Bye everybody!

Session 50

Apheori (GM): GOOD MORNING CAMPUTERS.
Or campers or whatever the hell it was I meant to say.
Frezak (GM): Ptarmigan!
Apheori (GM): YES.
Ganelon: It's the afternoon here.
Probably the evening for you lot.
Apheori (GM): Well, yes.
BUT IGNORING THAT FOR A MOMENT.
Y'ALL ARE BY A TREE.
IT IS HUGE. AND TREE-Y.
YEAH.
That's kind of not the point.
Ganelon: We were ready to go to a hole.
Apheori (GM): You're by the tree with a god. Gravy just buried another god. You were going to go to a hole.
Gaurav: Does the buried god get a tombstone?
Apheori (GM): Apparently Kyrule wants to leave Dawn with the tree so she can act as an anchor.
Kyrule: Huh?
Frezak (GM): I do graves, not tombstones;
THat's my other character, the Engravesman
Gaurav: Hee.
Tree: I got this, guys. I'll tell anyone who cares he's there.
I am a GREAT tombstone.
Gaurav: Did Gravy ever Gravyvision the gods?
Tree: Like that big dark thing buried even deeper, I mark that like nobody's business.
The Gravedigger: Thanks, Tree.
Frezak (GM): I don't think so, Gaurav.
Kyrule: You're supposed to be guarding that, not marking it.
Tree: Yeah, yeah, it's all bugs.
Rhu: ... big dark thing?
Tree: Oh, you know. It's big. And dark. And all that.
Huge, like.
Apheori (GM): Are Dawn and Amadi still hiding?
Dawn's probably just doing whatever Amadi is. I don't remember.
Rhu gives everybody a "huh?" look. It is probably indistinguishable from his usual expression.
Bear Soup Guy: It would be amazing if Amadi and Dawn talked and acted in perfect unison for a while for now reason
We could call them AmaDawn
Ellemerr: Oh, no. Pretending all this is perfectly natural. Probably by eating ice-cream.
Bear Soup Guy: s/now/no
Apheori (GM): Man, now I really don't want to leave Dawn behind.
Because that would be awesome.
Radek: ...Guarding, you say.
From outsiders, or for the sake of outsiders?
Kyrule: Yes.
Radek smirks.
Ganelon: You might think that's a cryptic answer, but it explains everything!
Tree: Well, you know. They buried it, they forgot about it, they pretended it was never there.
Pretty easy when the entire history got rewrote, that.
Apheori (GM): Yes@
Rhu: Who buried ... what? Exactly?
Greibel: Oh come on, Rhu. Keep up, man.
The big horrible thing.
Tree: Yeaah, man, you'll...
Apheori (GM): The tree gets interrupted.
I need to figure out by what.
Hold on.
Kyrule interrupts telling the tree to stop talking now.
Kyrule: Stop talking, please.
Tree.
Vivek.
You.
Kyrule waggles hands.
Rhu: (to Greibel) What big horrible thing? We have enough big horrible things. We don't need more big horrible things.
Greibel: That's why they buried it, man.
Rhu: Oh.
Frezak (GM): Greibel is so fucking WISE
Amadi takes a sip of tea and tells whoever's closest - probably Dawn - that yes, Kyrule is still being terribly rude. Some people just never change. And gods are the worst. It goes with the job; having to represent things and stuff.
Apheori (GM): Man, I dunno if I'm playing Kyrule completely wrong now, or more accurately.
Dawn: (to Amadi) So what do we represent?
Apheori (GM): Greibel's wisdom is HUGE.
Bigger than godly wisdom, definitely.
Tree: Yeah, man. That.
Amadi takes another sip of tea, gets it down wrong and starts coughing like crazy.
Kyrule eyes the tree suspiciously.
Ganelon: Shame 4E's built on nothing ever increasing your ability scores except levels.
Apheori (GM): ...that almost just happened to me.
What Amadi did.
Ganelon: He can't actually have super huge wisdom.
Frezak (GM): Gravy slaps Amadi on the back.
Apheori (GM): >.<
Frezak (GM): With a gravy-sized hand
because that's what he's got
Apheori (GM): 4e has a lot of limitations that make me sad.
Like will saves. I love making people roll will saves.
Ganelon: He should find himself a smaller hand, Frezak.
Apheori (GM): Such interaction.
And that would be a fort save.
Such fort.
Much force.
Very handy.
Frezak (GM): I take Dave's hand and use it to pat Amadi on the back
Apheori (GM): Amadi stops choking from the second one, but nearly falls over from the first one.
Amadi coughs out a "thanks".
Apheori (GM): Dawn gives Gravy a surprised "Oing?"
Frezak (GM): Gravy saves the day again.
Gaurav: As usual.
Ellemerr: Whatever would we do without him.
Frezak (GM): Kill people.
Ganelon: Us?
Please, we're harmless.
Kyrule: One last thing before we head out.
Gaurav: Unless you offer us lollipops and then don't pay up.
Kyrule: We'll need to leave behind an anchor, something to mark this place and time in order to return to it.
Ganelon: Rhu's the only guy with a job involving the necessary injury of others and he'd probably mess that up too unless it were really serious.
Gaurav: Or you're an eel. We're bad for eels. Well, Rhu is.
I assume everybody points at Rhu at this point.
Kyrule: I could try bribing a certain someone here with a lollipop, but at this point I believe you best option would be to have Dawn remain behind.
Rhu: I ... have a skull? Would that work?
The Gravedigger: Byedavethanksseeya
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Dawn: Um... okay?
Kyrule: Just stay here. And don't wander off. Have a cat.
Kyrule hands Dawn a sphinx.
The Gravedigger: Really time to leave now!
Apheori (GM): Different sphinx from before.
Radek: ...You had better take that back when we return.
Dawn: Uh...
Dawn stares at the sphinx.
Radek: It's enough of a burden keeping Dawn in line.
Kyrule: Of course.
Ganelon: Maybe this is a nicer sphinx, but it's the same old Radek.
Apheori (GM): Poor Dawn.
Pity.
Ganelon: He's not a cat, dog, or... "organic life" person.
Apheori (GM): If anyone had actually wanted her, you could have done the Dawn and Amadi acting exactly the same thing.
Gaurav: I want her! Dawn and Rhu have a rapport.
She has many wise things to tell him on the idiocy of deities.
Apheori (GM): Then say something
Amadi: How about Squirrel? She likes it here and everything.
Amadi gives Squirrel suspicious glances.
Rhu: It might be useful to have someone who can fly with us.
Squirrel suddenly reappears at Amadi's mention.
Squirrel: Squirrel!
Kyrule shakes her head.
Rhu: And besides, she can fight. Sort of.
Frezak (GM): brb
Kyrule: You need someone who can stay put.
Amadi's... key might work, too, however.
Amadi: Would not!
If it stays, I stay, and I'm not staying.
Kyrule: You could use Dawn as a temporary key while binding your main form to this plane.
Amadi: Eeeew
Kyrule: I'm not sure if that is entirely a good idea, of course.
Amadi makes a disgusted face.
Ellemerr: I approve of that plan, though. It sounds like it'd go marvellously wrong.
Apheori (GM): Heh.
Ellemerr: ... I don't think I can convince Amadi.
Apheori (GM): She won't force you, though.
So it'll have to be... SQUIRREL.
You'll be followed into a great hole by Squirrel.
...I blame you.
Around now the sphinx tries to climb Dawn's face and she falls over.
Covered in fluff and wings.
Kyrule: Very well, then.
Apheori (GM): I guess at this point y'all just get transported.
Frezak (GM): It's the drugs again!
Apheori (GM): Leaving Dawn behind, but apparently taking Squirrel with you.
I am so sorry.
Gaurav: What does being transported feel like?
Apheori (GM): I'unno.
What should it feel like?
Frezak (GM): MAGIC
Like being coated in eldritch pea soup
And then hummed at by a blind giant
Ganelon: It feels like aaaAAAAAAAAAAAGH.
AAAAAAAAGH
Bear Soup Guy: While going up slightly too fast in an elevator
Apheori (GM): It doesn't feel like god magic. It's much more sudden and smooth and precise.
You're one place, and then you're another place, but it's like all of everything just sort of shifted around you.
Wasn't even a breeze. Just a vague hum.
The giant is drowsy today.
Gaurav: You guys are the best.
Apheori (GM): You are taken to a dark expanse of not-quite land. The ground is twisted, distorted, black and glassy, the clouds low and roiling, full of lightning with no thunder, tinted with yellow. Dead plants lie scorched against the ground, all pointing the same directon as though blown over from some great blast.
Glints of purple glow from cracks and crevices, under rocks, beneath your feet. The very shadows are glowing. Off in the distance, in the direction where the trees' trunks point, the same glow rises out of nothing, painting the clouds in horrible splashes of sickening colour.
Even here, you can hear it whispering.
So it's all of you, plus Kyrule and Squirrel.
Apheori (GM): DUN DUN DUNNNN.
Crap, did I ever actually write down the whole spirally thingy?
Gaurav: Man, I love the word "roiling".
The Gravedigger: Gosh.
Apheori (GM): Dammit, I wish I could make you all do fortitude saves.
Ellemerr: I have food, now. I don't promise that it'll help, but there's some food. Also, I love that description. :3
Apheori (GM): CURSE YOU 4E.
Yay!
Ganelon: You technically can.
Just have people roll their fortitude defense -10.
Apheori (GM): GREAT. DO THAT.
EVERYONE.
Radek: rolling 1d20+6
(
6
)
+6
= 12
Apheori (GM): Except Amadi.
Ellemerr: Heheheh
Frezak (GM): Let me even find my sheet
Rhu: rolling d20+5 fort save
(
14
)
+5
= 19
Apheori (GM): Aaagh, crap, I knew I forgot something.
...good thing I don't have any characters. >.>
Frezak (GM): rolling 1D20+9
(
14
)
+9
= 23
Bear Soup Guy: Uhm
Oh, I see
rolling 1d20+3
(
20
)
+3
= 23
Nailed it
Apheori (GM): Heheh.
Okay, uh...
Radek... is affected somehow.
I need to go to the bathroom while I figure out how.
If I can.
Radek gets mild vertigo.
Apheori (GM): Which I guess impacts his reflexes or something. Hell if I know.
Ganelon: So he's stumbling around?
Apheori (GM): Probably just feels like he might fall over, or something. He can stumble if he wants.
Ganelon: He'll... try to maintain his balance.
Apheori (GM): He should be fine... for now.
When weird things start happening, er, remind me or something?
Bear Soup Guy: If he falls he should stabilize himself on Greibel
He won't even flinch
(To Amadi): This is one of many, many things that can happen around significant holes. There's others, too. Some have fish. You don't know how you know this.
Bear Soup Guy: Then again I imagine Radek would ordinarily be pretty easy to support without a crit roll
Ganelon: Sure.
And yeah, Radek isn't unnaturally light like Amadi, but he's a withered old guy.
(From Ellemerr): Aw, I'd have wanted fish...
Ganelon: Hardly a lot of mass.
(To Amadi): You think Dawn is telling you this.
(To Amadi): You get a sense of a face-full of cat.
Amadi wrinkles her nose.
Bear Soup Guy: brb
Squirrel wrinkles her nose as well.
Kyrule: This is the result of a large rift, spreading its corruption through the land. Left unchecked, it would take out the entire world, until all remaining surrounding forces are all too weak to draw it further.
Radek: You...
Radek holds a hand to his forehead and tries to focus on the glowing horizon.
Radek: I'm supposed to close this?
Kyrule: It's a bit of a hike to the thing itself. We couldn't come out closer due to the... distortions.
The Gravedigger: Why haven't you ? If you know it's here.
Apheori (GM): That ... should be a word.
I dunno what the word is.
Something like 'gravitational', but bigger, encompassing more things, including gravity.
And reality.
And... stuff.
Frezak (GM): Distortion is a word.
Apheori (GM): Right, but it's a something distortion.
Frezak (GM): Dimensional?
Planar?
Apheori (GM): Space-time dimensional distortions.
That's what she said. Totally. shifty eyes
Does /this/ do anything too?
Pfft.
Ellemerr: I'm very annoyed.
Also very nearly made Amadi very annoyed.
Apheori (GM): Oh?
Ellemerr: I don't like them taking my stars.
Apheori (GM): Oh, aye.
Ganelon: She prizes those asterisks.
Apheori (GM): Especially since they didn't even take them CORRECTLY.
Ganelon: I wonder, though...
Does this work?
Apheori (GM): Normally they bold, if anything. Italics is just wrong.
Ganelon: ...Wow.
Skype's italic format, _this_, is nice.
But four asterisks in Roll20 leads to normal text.
So you can't even go overboard. It's infallible.
Asterisks not allowed.
Apheori (GM): Ghuh.
Ellemerr: You use asteriks for everything here. One set is italics, two is bold... three is both. There's no underline, to my knowledge.
Apheori (GM): That is horrible.
Ganelon: No underlines, and no strikethrough.
Apheori (GM): Why can't they use standard formats, or even just use buttons, like everyone else? >.
>.>
Ganelon: I guess you can still do ~this~?
Apheori (GM): Ew.
Ellemerr: Meh. MEH!
Frezak (GM): blargh!
Ganelon: I appreciate tildes. They're a good way to denote speaking in a non-common language.
Apheori (GM): Oh, aye.
They did work well for that.
Still look gross in general, though. >.>
Ellemerr: And R20 doesn't approve of >brackets< either.
Frezak (GM):
Ellemerr: ANYWAY!
Apheori (GM): RIGHT.
Kyrule said, "It's a bit of a hike to the thing itself. We couldn't come out closer due to the space-time dimensional distortions.
Gravy said, "Why haven't you (closed it)? If you know it's here. "
Kyrule: Technically I really don't.
Strictly-speaking.
Apheori (GM): This is a really convoluted mess.
Also someone should ask how long this hole has even been here.
Or something.
Kyrule: But this hole is new, existing within the general timeline for only a few weeks. It is an opportunity, and should your methds fail, then indeed I will need to close it through my own means.
Apheori (GM): I CAN WORDAGE.
Gaurav: I'm going to check with Hazz' to see what he makes of this.
Apheori (GM): Oh dear.
Rhu: rolling d20+10 religion check with Hazz' on this hole.
(
2
)
+10
= 12
Ellemerr: Oh dear indeed.
Gaurav: Some roll.
Apheori (GM): Hmmmmmmmm.
Hmmmm.
Hmmm.
Rhu's all made up with Hazz, is he?
Bear Soup Guy: Evidently not.
Apheori (GM): Heheh.
Gaurav: BSG: Hee.
Apheori (GM): Yeah, nothing comes of that.
Gaurav: Um, I guess he's willing to ask him a question at this point.
Ellemerr: phone
Gaurav: Not trust him or obey him or anything, just ask.
Radek: Let me see the rift itself.
Kyrule: Stay close.
Radek tries to use Gravy to support his own failing sense of balance.
Ganelon: Not sure whether he'd even notice if he weren't looking.
Frezak (GM): How would you even do that?
Kyrule leads everyone toward the glow, picking a way around the dead trees and various rocks and crap. Blah blah.
Ganelon: What do you mean?
Gravy's a big, sturdy dude.
Ellemerr: Phonecall paused. Will resume once Anna (who says "Hi!" to y'all and particularly Frezak) has talked with some other people. Yes.
Ganelon: It's like putting your hand on a wall to lean on.
Frezak (GM): How does a tiny old man use a giant as a support?
Yeah, but the wall moves.
Suppose you could lean on his shield.
That will be replaced with a sarcophagus lid as soon as I get to do that.
Amadi gives Radek curious looks.
Amadi: If you want a ride, you just have to ask, you know. Actually, I'm not even sure you need to ask. Gravy, can I have a ride?
Apheori (GM): What do you need to get to do that?
Frezak (GM): A sarcophagus with a lid.
Or magic.
Squirrel repeats everything Amadi just said.
Frezak (GM): I'm a god, it's part of the image.
I'll do it when no-one is looking.
Gravy grabs Amadi and places her in the correct position.
Radek: I don't need a ride, I just...
Amadi whees and throws a cupcake at Squirrel.
Radek: Pfah, never mind.
Squirrel whees and throws a cupcake at Radek.
Greibel chuckles
Ganelon: A cupcake? Bah!
Bah!
I wish I had the skills to dodge or deflect that.
Frezak (GM): You have a reflex defense.
Apheori (GM): Alas.
Ganelon: That actually is my highest defense, so fair enough.
Frezak (GM): Presumaby that indicates reflexes.
Amadi: You just... don't know exactly how to stay on your feet? Teleportation-sickness? Or is it the intricate artfulness of this exquisite landscape that is messing with your otherwise impressive head?
The Gravedigger: It is a pretty great head.
Squirrel repears Amadi's line backwards.
Squirrel: t
The Gravedigger: Don't tell him I said that, it'll go to it.
Frezak (GM): Said to Amadi despite the fact that he's in arms reach of Radek.
Kyrule: In your timeline it would have been a few hundred years since these events, but leaving a rift like this open for so long would probably have spelled the end of the world.
According to our histories it was closed, here, on this day, though the exact details will be open to interpretation.
Frezak (GM): What's the dirt here like?
Apheori (GM): Terrible.
It's dry and glassy, and in some places it's even a bit bubbly.
Radek: Then... you're having us fulfill history.
Frezak (GM): THIS HOLE MUST BE ENDED
Kyrule: Yes.
One way or another.
Ganelon: He doesn't answer Amadi mostly because he doesn't want to admit that he's all woozy.
Frezak (GM): We ARE in the process of moving towards teh thingy, right?
Apheori (GM): Silly Radek. He mustn't like doctors much.
Yeah.
You're approaching!
The landscape is getting weirder, the sky scarier.
There are cracks in the ground now, great glowing crevices where the earth has split. Most are small, no more than a few cm, easy to step across, or certainly jumpable, but others... others form ravines meters across, and as you navigate your way down the twisting spiral of sundered earth, the pattern becomes clear. It's at the centre of all this, the middle. The twisting horror, full of voices and shadows, memories and possibilities, all wrong, wrong, wrong.
Frezak (GM): The dirt rubbishier?
Apheori (GM): It's getting horrible.
Frezak (GM): Boooo!
Ganelon: ...
Apheori (GM): Becoming even difficult to distinguish as dirt.
Ganelon: I'm going to take some horrible dirt back with me.
Apheori (GM): It's like stone, but glassy. You wind up having to chip off a chunk with something.
Like a chisel or trowel or whatever.
Ganelon: Horrible!
Gaurav: Can we actually hear the voices and shadows?
Apheori (GM): You hear whispers, and distant shouts, but nothing is all that distinguishable, unless Gravy or Greibel actually want to distinguish it.
Frezak (GM): Not really!
Apheori (GM): It also feels like you're being trailed by shadows in the corners of your vision, strange shapes moving on their own accord, some glowing with the same weird un-light as everything else, some... not.
Bear Soup Guy: Greibel is content to take it all in like a really deep art installation
Apheori (GM): Duuude.
That would be awesome.
If thissort of ambiance could be preserved...
Bear Soup Guy: Yes
Yes it would
Alas I am no animator
Apheori (GM): Hmm.
Frezak (GM): Pickles!
Bear Soup Guy: If any of you are animators and want to animate it
I will record ambient music that will be fitting fo rit
Frezak (GM): Gravy just looks at Radek to do something smart.
Apheori (GM): You come to a rift that's more sideways than the others, forming a bit of a cave entrance.
Er, ravine.
Crevice.
Thing.
It's also glowing horribly.
D20s!
Frezak (GM): Cool.
rolling 1D20
(
8
)
= 8
Ganelon: Okay, so... I forget if something was necessarily wrong with the latest method I devices to close these things.
Rhu: rolling d20
(
12
)
= 12
Ganelon: That being energy-to-reality synthesis.
rolling 1d20
(
3
)
= 3
Amadi: rolling 1d20
(
12
)
= 12
Ganelon: Aaaaagh
Apheori (GM) shrugs.
Apheori (GM): I dunno!
Bear Soup Guy: rolling 1d20
(
16
)
= 16
Ganelon: Also I said "devices" when I meant "devised".
This is why I spoke of my distraction earlier.
Apheori (GM): Greibel, Radek, and Amadi: The shadows aren't there. The voices aren't there. You're seeing through the world, to elsewhere, another side, other places. You get a sense that you could almost fall through, even...
Gravy: It doesn't see you. Yet.
The Gravedigger: This is a mess.
Kyrule: Ye-es...
Radek: This is... light is bleeding through from other dimensions.
Amadi: Yes! Innit shiny?
Amadi giggles and follows some shadows with her finger.
Amadi: Shiiiiny.
Squirrel giggles and wraps a shadow in another shadow.
Frezak (GM): Dammit, and I know EXACTLY what that's like!
Squirrel: Shiiiiny.
Frezak (GM): Stop it!
Apheori (GM): Frezak: What're you referring to?
Radek: So it's true, then.
Frezak (GM): The "shiiiiny" part as coming from the hag.
Radek: I truly could create a bridge between worlds like this...
Amadi: Or a gate or an elevator or... maybe even a river.
The Gravedigger: Maybe when the universe isn't falling to bits, hmm?
Squirrel: Or a well or a portal or... maybe even a moribundis.
Amadi nods sagely to herself and Squirrel. Who probably nods just as sagely back.
Apheori (GM): Exactly.
Kyrule: You could, but for now it would be better to focus on the immediate problems.
Radek: Ah. Y-yes, of course.
Gaurav: I like how Gravy's now the guy who stops Radek from destroying the universe.
Frezak (GM): Someone has to!
Kyrule should have just pointed at Gravy and said, "What he said."
Apheori (GM): Half of the party are gods.
This is a little disturbing.
Do you enter the ravine cavern?
Frezak (GM): Looks like it.
Ganelon: I guess we have to.
Apheori (GM): BWAHAHAHAH.
Gaurav: Rhu's just going to follow Gravy and Radek wherever they go.
Apheori (GM): Your DM is busy eating whipped cream and will actually write up what happens when you do in a moment.
Frezak (GM): To hell and back!
Apheori (GM): Mmmm, whipped cream.
Amadi's eating ice cream, right?
Amadi eats a bananasplit ice cream with whipped cream, vanilla cream and chocolate sauce.
Apheori (GM): Cool.
Squirrel eats a really thick ice cream baileys frappuccino.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Um.
Er.
Hmm.
You enter, and it seems that here, the glow is fainter, or perhaps it's simply permeating everything now, no escape. The soft vibrating that you feel in your bones, it's nothing more than the humming air, handsaws twanging, cats purring too many to hear.
Frezak (GM): I really don't like that.
Apheori (GM): Hmm.
Frezak (GM): That last line sounds like some WoD shizzle.
Apheori (GM): You're in a bit of a narrow passage angling down into the glow, where the earth literally split.
Rhu: Is it supposed to be this ... shivery?
Ellemerr: Man, I'm stealing that line for WoD.
Frezak (GM): Gaaah!
Radek: ...Dreadful.
Nothing here is as it's supposed to be.
Kyrule: (murmuring) They went in here, just the two of them, alone, with only the thin tether of need to guide them. I sent them to their deaths... and worse.
Fucking hells.
(From Ellemerr): Do I know what she's talking about?
(To Ellemerr): Vardaman and Ariel. It was recent; they went in looking for a piece of something... and you would know because Ariel was one of yours. Vardaman was one of mine, and Ariel one of yours, and we lost them both.
Gaurav: I'm just going to assume Rhu didn't hear that. It'd make him unnecessarily nervous.
Frezak (GM): Gravy goes "HEY RHU DID YOU YEAR THAT SCARY OMINOUS STUFF THAT GOD JUST SAID?"
Or not.
Apheori (GM): DO IT.
Frezak (GM): Are gonna need light?
Gaurav: hahahahaahah
Ellemerr: phone
Apheori (GM): Noooooooo!
Uh, okay.
You keep going, Amadi is distracted by something, Squirrel is distracted by something else, and gods dammit I need to pee.
It seems to be getting darker, or possibly lighter, but seeing is getting difficult.
Uhhhh.
This is weird as arse.
Gaurav: It is.
Apheori (GM): Drink!
I may have forgotten something very important.
I should have drawn a map.
I'm sorry.
Y'all cannot see. There is only blackness and no light, only solitude and no others. You feel alone, completely isolated in the black, nothing to do or be or see.
But you just were right there, the others all around...
Gaurav: Rhu's pretty used to being in weird caves by now.
He's not going to panic unless giant fish show up.
Rhu: rolling d20
(
12
)
= 12
Apheori (GM): Something huge and fishy falls on Rhu, knocking him over.
Rhu: Ah!
Apheori (GM): Also you all hear that./
You just can't see anything.
Radek: ...Rhu? Are you still there?
Rhu scrambles out from under the thing.
Apheori (GM): Rhu runs into Gravy's legs.
Rhu: Holy ...
What the hack was that thing?!
Frezak (GM): There's a cultist in my legs!
Apheori (GM): Can I steal Ellemerr's character?
Gaurav: Gravy's Holy Legs
Ellemerr: yes
Apheori (GM): Alternately, can I tell you to say something about something?
Ellemerr: yes
(To Ellemerr): Something about how if there's light, they won't like what they see. Shadows with no form, horror that hungers in the light...
(To Ellemerr): But of course there will be light or something.
(To Ellemerr): I don't know.
Frezak (GM): Is Greibel's bong still glwoing?
*glowing?
Apheori (GM): Nope.
Frezak (GM): Aaaw
Apheori (GM): Sorry.
Gaurav: We still have our space-elf lights and stuff, don't we?
Apheori (GM): You should. Want to activate one?
Rhu gets up, and tries to get closer look at the thing that fell on him.
Apheori (GM): You can't see anything.
Amadi: That was a giant fish! That you don't want to look at! It's like... y'know... shadows cast by shapeless nothings and... hungers. Except it needs light. Wants light. I think.
Rhu: rolling d20+15 perception check after turning on his space-elf light thing
(
13
)
+15
= 28
Gaurav: Um.
Amadi: ... Oh, you have light.
That's... great?
Rhu: What?!
Apheori (GM): Squirrel says everything Amadi does at the same time.
Rhu turns his light off.
Gaurav: Deep dread warnings in stereo.
Apheori (GM): Man, if only I could just kill you all for that. Except that wouldn't actually be funny.
Kyrule floods the passage with light at the same time as Rhu turns his off.
Gaurav: You can kill Rhu if you like. He's used to it.
Kyrule: Light travels too slowly to turn it off now.
Amadi: ... I guess that works.
Squirrel: I suppose it works.
The Gravedigger: Aaagh light!
Kyrule: The shadows. The light will keep them at bay, but at the same time, it also gives them form. In the darkness, they have no power, for there is nothing to cast their edges. In the light... in the memory of light, they can only eat.
Rhu: Is this where the giant fish on Sarathi came from?o
Kyrule: No.
It's messing with you, trying to find an opening.
Guard your minds. It will seek to exploit any weakness, open any wound.
The Gravedigger: Why?
Amadi: My mind is so guarded. I've got, like, archers and pots of boiling oil. Also, the princess is in another castle.
Kyrule: There is a presense, an... other within the darkness. I have sensed it a few times, though I do not know... what it is.
Frezak (GM): IS THE PRINCESS A DRAGON?
Squirrel: (at the same time as Amadi) My mind isn't guarded. I've got, like, sparrows and a piece of cheese. Also, the princes are all dead.
The Gravedigger: Have you asked?
Kyrule: Not successfully.
Communication exists on different levels, but this... presense, if it even is the same one, is so alien that I do not know where to begin.
The Gravedigger: Hmm.
Amadi: We should try. Should we try?
The Gravedigger nods thoughtfully
Frezak (GM): Gravy breathes in, in a gravylike fashion
The Gravedigger: HEEEEELLOOOOOOOO?
Apheori (GM): The shadows at the edge of the light roil with need, straining at the light, sharpest at its edges, but unable to come any closer.
Gaurav: Can we see the giant fish clearly now in all the light?
Kyrule: Break down meanings into patterns, break down patterns into something else, and perhaps, perhaps you could try.
I once tried speaking to Kyrule in this way. He did not like it.
Amadi nods knowingly.
Apheori (GM): The giant fish is clearly a giant fish, but it also looks a bit transparentish.
(To Amadi): For extra hilarity, it was you-not-you who indirectly taught this Kyrule how to do that in the first place.
Frezak (GM): Transparenfish
(From Amadi): Such hilarity. nodnods
(To Amadi): Very.
Gaurav: Is it a dead giant fish, then? I imagined it writhing or something.
Apheori (GM): It's dead.
Maybe it writhed before.
It's dead now.
Radek: Patterns, you say.
The Gravedigger: Interpretative dance?
Gaurav: Are we having this conversation standing around the dead fish, or have we resumed walking through to the other end of this tunnel thing? Because I'd like to get out of here.
Kyrule: The mathematics are extremely complex, so much that even the Book could not parse it.
Brute forcing it didn't work either, of course.
And I love brute forcing things.
Dancing might do it, for all I know.
Amadi: Did I try bribery? I should've tried bribery.
Kyrule: If it's the right kind of dance.
Ballet didn't.
Kyrule goes up on a toe for emphasis.
The Gravedigger: Maybe you need a beard.
Kyrule suddenly has a really long, white beard.
Kyrule strokes it consideringly.
Apheori (GM): It's a beard to rival Radek's own.
Radek strokes his own beard competitively.
Gaurav: It's a beard-off!
Kyrule takes up the challenge, upping the ante with competitive beard stroking.
Squirrel: (to Amadi) Or a brewery!
Amadi: ... Both?
Squirrel: Both?
Gaurav: I'm going to have to leave in 10-15mins, but if you want to keep going, Rhu's now-readable character sheet is at https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u/19429772/dnd-skype/Rhu.pdf
Ellemerr: I'm, as usual, going to need sleep.
Apheori (GM): Also I assume a this point everyone's just sort of standing around.
Because nevermind reality falling apart or your so important mission, there was a FISH! And BEARDS!
Should we just conclude the beard-off and then pick up here next time?
Bear Soup Guy: Seems like a good place for it
Apheori (GM): Would anyone here make a good impartial judge to settle the beard dispute?
Gaurav: Hazz'ridan the Magnificent
Bear Soup Guy: ^
Gaurav: If someone asks me, I'll pray to Hazz' for this.
me -> Rhu
Ganelon: Alright.
What do I roll to beard?
Apheori (GM): Uh... charisma?
...what the hell does Kyrule roll?
Ganelon: Okay, I'm treating this as a trained charisma-based skill.
rolling 1d20+5+3
(
8
)
+5+3
= 16
That's training + 1/2 level. Radek has no Cha bonus.
Apheori (GM): She probably does, but I have no idea what it would be. >.>
...she rolled a natural 17. I think she wins. >.>
I'm sorry.
Getting into competitions with gods seems not to end well.
Gaurav: I assume Radek doesn't have to recognise her victory. Even if he knows in his heart that her beard was better.
Kyrule looks slightly apologetic and then loses the beard.
Ganelon: Alas.
Apheori (GM): Okay, so next week?
Can everyone do that?
Ganelon: Yeah.
I should be far less busy then.
Ellemerr: I foresee no obstacles.
Gaurav: I'll be there!
Frezak (GM): Yyyyep
Apheori (GM): Excellent.
We shall pick up here.
I do so love you guys.
Bear Soup Guy: You only want us for our ballet Jesus
Apheori (GM): I'm not saying one way or another.
Bear Soup Guy: It's okay, it's hard to cast blame. Ballet Jesus has that effect on people.
Frezak (GM): He's divine.