Difference between revisions of "Holes/Session 50"

A fragment of the Garden of Remembering
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<pre>
<screenplay>
Apheori (GM): GOOD MORNING CAMPUTERS.
EXT. Large, shaded tree clearing - evening
Or campers or whatever the hell it was I meant to say.
 
Frezak (GM): Ptarmigan!
Along with Kyrule and midgets, the party is loitering around the tree, near the new grave. Greibel is nodding vaguely to himself. Amadi is eating ice cream, pretending this is all completely normal.
Apheori (GM): YES.
 
Ganelon: It's the afternoon here.
KYRULE
Probably the evening for you lot.
The hole awaits. Are you all ready?
Apheori (GM): Well, yes.
 
BUT IGNORING THAT FOR A MOMENT.
DAWN
Y'ALL ARE BY A TREE.
What about Djieka? Shouldn't he have a marker?
IT IS HUGE. AND TREE-Y.
 
YEAH.
TREE
That's kind of not the point.
I got this, guys. I'll tell anyone who cares he's there. I am a GREAT tombstone.
Ganelon: We were ready to go to a hole.
Like that big dark thing buried even deeper, I mark that like nobody's business.
Apheori (GM): You're by the tree with a god. Gravy just buried another god. You were going to go to a hole.
 
Gaurav: Does the buried god get a tombstone?
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Apheori (GM): Apparently Kyrule wants to leave Dawn with the tree so she can act as an anchor.
Thanks, Tree.
Kyrule: Huh?
 
Frezak (GM): I do graves, not tombstones;
KYRULE
THat's my other character, the Engravesman
You're supposed to be guarding that, not marking it.
Gaurav: Hee.
 
Tree: I got this, guys. I'll tell anyone who cares he's there.
TREE
I am a GREAT tombstone.
Yeah, yeah, it's all bugs.
Gaurav: Did Gravy ever Gravyvision the gods?
 
Tree: Like that big dark thing buried even deeper, I mark that like nobody's business.
RHU
The Gravedigger: Thanks, Tree.
...big dark thing?
Frezak (GM): I don't think so, Gaurav.
 
Kyrule: You're supposed to be guarding that, not marking it.
TREE
Tree: Yeah, yeah, it's all bugs.
Oh, you know. It's big. And dark. And all that. Huge, like.
Rhu: ... big dark thing?
 
Tree: Oh, you know. It's big. And dark. And all that.
Huge, like.
Apheori (GM): Are Dawn and Amadi still hiding?
Dawn's probably just doing whatever Amadi is. I don't remember.
Rhu gives everybody a "huh?" look. It is probably indistinguishable from his usual expression.
Rhu gives everybody a "huh?" look. It is probably indistinguishable from his usual expression.
Bear Soup Guy: It would be amazing if Amadi and Dawn talked and acted in perfect unison for a while for now reason
 
We could call them AmaDawn
RADEK
Ellemerr: Oh, no. Pretending all this is perfectly natural. Probably by eating ice-cream.
...Guarding, you say. From outsiders, or for the sake of outsiders?
Bear Soup Guy: s/now/no
 
Apheori (GM): Man, now I really don't want to leave Dawn behind.
KYRULE
Because that would be awesome.
Yes.
Radek: ...Guarding, you say.
 
From outsiders, or for the sake of outsiders?
Kyrule: Yes.
Radek smirks.
Radek smirks.
Ganelon: You might think that's a cryptic answer, but it explains everything!
 
Tree: Well, you know. They buried it, they forgot about it, they pretended it was never there.
'''''Ganelon''' (Radek): You might think that's a cryptic answer, but it explains everything!
 
TREE
Well, you know. They buried it, they forgot about it, they pretended it was never there.
Pretty easy when the entire history got rewrote, that.
Pretty easy when the entire history got rewrote, that.
Apheori (GM): Yes@
 
Rhu: Who buried ... what? Exactly?
RHU
Greibel: Oh come on, Rhu. Keep up, man.
Who buried... what? Exactly?
The big horrible thing.
 
Tree: Yeaah, man, you'll...
GREIBEL
Apheori (GM): The tree gets interrupted.
Oh come on, Rhu. Keep up, man. The big horrible thing.
I need to figure out by what.
 
Hold on.
TREE
Kyrule interrupts telling the tree to stop talking now.
Yeaah, man, you'll...
Kyrule: Stop talking, please.
 
Tree.
KYRULE
Vivek.
(interrupting the tree)
You.
Vivek, stop talking, please.
Kyrule waggles hands.
 
Rhu: (to Greibel) What big horrible thing? We have enough big horrible things. We don't need more big horrible things.
RHU
Greibel: That's why they buried it, man.
(to Greibel)
Rhu: Oh.
What big horrible thing? We have enough big horrible things. We don't need more big horrible things.
Frezak (GM): Greibel is so fucking WISE
 
Amadi takes a sip of tea and tells whoever's closest - probably Dawn - that yes, Kyrule is still being terribly rude. Some people just never change. And gods are the worst. It goes with the job; having to represent things and stuff.
GREIBEL
Apheori (GM): Man, I dunno if I'm playing Kyrule completely wrong now, or more accurately.
That's why they buried it, man.
Dawn: (to Amadi) So what do we represent?
 
Apheori (GM): Greibel's wisdom is HUGE.
RHU
Bigger than godly wisdom, definitely.
Oh.
Tree: Yeah, man. That.
 
TREE
Yeah, man. That.
 
Kyrule eyes the tree suspiciously.
 
Amadi takes a sip of tea and turns to whoever's closest. This turns out to be Dawn.
 
AMADI
Yes, Kyrule is still being terribly rude. Some people just never change. And gods are the worst. It goes with the job; having to represent things and stuff.
 
DAWN
So what do we represent?
 
Amadi takes another sip of tea, gets it down wrong and starts coughing like crazy.
Amadi takes another sip of tea, gets it down wrong and starts coughing like crazy.
Kyrule eyes the tree suspiciously.
 
Ganelon: Shame 4E's built on nothing ever increasing your ability scores except levels.
The Gravedigger slaps Amadi on the back with a Gravy-sized hand. This doesn't entirely work and nearly knocks her over, so he then takes Dawn's hand and uses that to pat Amadi on the back.
Apheori (GM): ...that almost just happened to me.
 
What Amadi did.
Amadi stops choking.
Ganelon: He can't actually have super huge wisdom.
 
Frezak (GM): Gravy slaps Amadi on the back.
AMADI
Apheori (GM): >.<
(coughing)
Frezak (GM): With a gravy-sized hand
Thanks.
because that's what he's got
 
Apheori (GM): 4e has a lot of limitations that make me sad.
DAWN
Like will saves. I love making people roll will saves.
Oing?
Ganelon: He should find himself a smaller hand, Frezak.
 
Apheori (GM): Such interaction.
KYRULE
And that would be a fort save.
One last thing before we head out, then. We'll need to leave behind an anchor, something to mark this place and time in order to return to it.
Such fort.
I could try bribing a certain someone here with a lollipop, but at this point I believe your best option would be to have Dawn remain behind.
Much force.
 
Very handy.
RHU
Frezak (GM): I take Dave's hand and use it to pat Amadi on the back
I... have a skull? Would that work?
Apheori (GM): Amadi stops choking from the second one, but nearly falls over from the first one.
 
Amadi coughs out a "thanks".
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Apheori (GM): Dawn gives Gravy a surprised "Oing?"
Byedavethanksseeya.
Frezak (GM): Gravy saves the day again.
 
Gaurav: As usual.
DAWN
Ellemerr: Whatever would we do without him.
Um... okay?
Frezak (GM): Kill people.
 
Ganelon: Us?
KYRULE
Please, we're harmless.
(to Dawn)
Kyrule: One last thing before we head out.
Just stay here. And don't wander off. Have a cat.
Gaurav: Unless you offer us lollipops and then don't pay up.
 
Kyrule: We'll need to leave behind an anchor, something to mark this place and time in order to return to it.
Kyrule hands Dawn a sphinx. This is a different sphinx from before - sleek-furred and tortoiseshell, with mottled wings.
Ganelon: Rhu's the only guy with a job involving the necessary injury of others and he'd probably mess that up too unless it were really serious.
 
Gaurav: Or you're an eel. We're bad for eels. Well, Rhu is.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
I assume everybody points at Rhu at this point.
Really time to leave now!
Kyrule: I could try bribing a certain someone here with a lollipop, but at this point I believe you best option would be to have Dawn remain behind.
 
Rhu: I ... have a skull? Would that work?
RADEK
The Gravedigger: Byedavethanksseeya
...You had better take that back when we return. It's enough of a burden keeping Dawn in line.
Bear Soup Guy: XD
 
Dawn: Um... okay?
DAWN
Kyrule: Just stay here. And don't wander off. Have a cat.
(staring at the sphinx)
Kyrule hands Dawn a sphinx.
Uh...
The Gravedigger: Really time to leave now!
 
Apheori (GM): Different sphinx from before.
The sphinx purrs.
Radek: ...You had better take that back when we return.
 
Dawn: Uh...
KYRULE
Dawn stares at the sphinx.
Of course.
Radek: It's enough of a burden keeping Dawn in line.
 
Kyrule: Of course.
RHU
Ganelon: Maybe this is a nicer sphinx, but it's the same old Radek.
It might be useful to have someone who can fly with us. And besides, she can fight. Sort of.
Apheori (GM): Poor Dawn.
 
Pity.
AMADI
Ganelon: He's not a cat, dog, or... "organic life" person.
How about Squirrel? She likes it here and everything.
Apheori (GM): If anyone had actually wanted her, you could have done the Dawn and Amadi acting exactly the same thing.
 
Gaurav: I want her! Dawn and Rhu have a rapport.
Squirrel suddenly reappears at Amadi's mention.
She has many wise things to tell him on the idiocy of deities.
 
Apheori (GM): Then say something
Amadi: How about Squirrel? She likes it here and everything.
Amadi gives Squirrel suspicious glances.
Amadi gives Squirrel suspicious glances.
Rhu: It might be useful to have someone who can fly with us.
 
Squirrel suddenly reappears at Amadi's mention.
SQIRREL
Squirrel: Squirrel!
Squirrel!
Kyrule shakes her head.
 
Rhu: And besides, she can fight. Sort of.
KYRULE
Frezak (GM): brb
(she shakes her head)
Kyrule: You need someone who can stay put.
You need someone who can stay put. Amadi's... key might work, however.
Amadi's... key might work, too, however.
 
Amadi: Would not!
AMADI
If it stays, I stay, and I'm ''not'' staying.
Would not! If it stays, I stay, and I'm ''not'' staying.
Kyrule: You could use Dawn as a temporary key while binding your main form to this plane.
 
Amadi: Eeeew
KYRULE
Kyrule: I'm not sure if that is entirely a good idea, of course.
You could use Dawn as a temporary key while binding your main form to this plane.
 
AMADI
Eeeew.
 
Amadi makes a disgusted face.
Amadi makes a disgusted face.
Ellemerr: I approve of that plan, though. It sounds like it'd go marvellously wrong.
 
Apheori (GM): Heh.
KYRULE
Ellemerr: ... I don't think I can convince Amadi.
I'm not sure if that is entirely a good idea, of course.
Apheori (GM): She won't force you, though.
 
So it'll have to be... SQUIRREL.
The sphinx tries to climb Dawn's face and she falls over, covered in fur and wings.
You'll be followed into a great hole by Squirrel.
 
...I blame you.
KYRULE
Around now the sphinx tries to climb Dawn's face and she falls over.
Very well, then.
Covered in fluff and wings.
 
Kyrule: Very well, then.
And then everyone, except for Dawn, gets transported to somewhere else.
Apheori (GM): I guess at this point y'all just get transported.
 
Frezak (GM): It's the drugs again!
 
Apheori (GM): Leaving Dawn behind, but apparently taking Squirrel with you.
EXT. Great rift at Sanessee - badlands
I am so sorry.
 
Gaurav: What does being transported feel like?
The party is taken to a dark expanse of not-quite land. The ground here is twisted, distorted, black and glassy, the clouds low and roiling, full of lightning with no thunder, tinted with yellow. Dead plants lie scorched against the ground, all pointing the same directon as though blown over from some great blast.
Apheori (GM): I'unno.
 
What should it feel like?
Glints of purple and yellow glow from cracks and crevices, under rocks, beneath their feet. The very shadows are glowing. Off in the distance, in the direction where the trees' trunks point, the same glow rises out of nothing, painting the clouds in horrible splashes of sickening colour.
Frezak (GM): MAGIC
 
Like being coated in eldritch pea soup
Even here, they can hear it whispering.
And then hummed at by a blind giant
 
Ganelon: It feels like aaaAAAAAAAAAAAGH.
Radek gets mild vertigo. ''(rolled 12 fort)'' He maintains his balance for now.
AAAAAAAAGH
 
Bear Soup Guy: While going up slightly too fast in an elevator
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Apheori (GM): It doesn't feel like god magic. It's much more sudden and smooth and precise.
Gosh.
You're one place, and then you're another place, but it's like all of everything just sort of shifted around you.
 
Wasn't even a breeze. Just a vague hum.
The giant is drowsy today.
Gaurav: You guys are the best.
Apheori (GM): You are taken to a dark expanse of not-quite land. The ground is twisted, distorted, black and glassy, the clouds low and roiling, full of lightning with no thunder, tinted with yellow. Dead plants lie scorched against the ground, all pointing the same directon as though blown over from some great blast.
Glints of purple glow from cracks and crevices, under rocks, beneath your feet. The very shadows are glowing. Off in the distance, in the direction where the trees' trunks point, the same glow rises out of nothing, painting the clouds in horrible splashes of sickening colour.
Even here, you can hear it whispering.
So it's all of you, plus Kyrule and Squirrel.
Apheori (GM): DUN DUN DUNNNN.
Crap, did I ever actually write down the whole spirally thingy?
Gaurav: Man, I love the word "roiling".
The Gravedigger: Gosh.
Apheori (GM): Dammit, I wish I could make you all do fortitude saves.
Ellemerr: I have food, now. I don't promise that it'll help, but there's some food. Also, I love that description. :3
Apheori (GM): CURSE YOU 4E.
Yay!
Ganelon: You technically can.
Just have people roll their fortitude defense -10.
Apheori (GM): GREAT. DO THAT.
EVERYONE.
Radek: rolling 1d20+6
(
6
)
+6
= 12
Apheori (GM): Except Amadi.
Ellemerr: Heheheh
Frezak (GM): Let me even find my sheet
Rhu: rolling d20+5 fort save
(
14
)
+5
= 19
Apheori (GM): Aaagh, crap, I knew I forgot something.
...good thing I don't have any characters. >.>
Frezak (GM): rolling 1D20+9
(
14
)
+9
= 23
Bear Soup Guy: Uhm
Oh, I see
rolling 1d20+3
(
20
)
+3
= 23
Nailed it
Apheori (GM): Heheh.
Okay, uh...
Radek... is affected somehow.
I need to go to the bathroom while I figure out how.
If I can.
Radek gets mild vertigo.
Apheori (GM): Which I guess impacts his reflexes or something. Hell if I know.
Ganelon: So he's stumbling around?
Apheori (GM): Probably just feels like he might fall over, or something. He can stumble if he wants.
Ganelon: He'll... try to maintain his balance.
Apheori (GM): He should be fine... for now.
When weird things start happening, er, remind me or something?
Bear Soup Guy: If he falls he should stabilize himself on Greibel
He won't even flinch
(To Amadi): This is one of many, many things that can happen around significant holes. There's others, too. Some have fish. You don't know how you know this.
Bear Soup Guy: Then again I imagine Radek would ordinarily be pretty easy to support without a crit roll
Ganelon: Sure.
And yeah, Radek isn't unnaturally light like Amadi, but he's a withered old guy.
(From Ellemerr): Aw, I'd have wanted fish...
Ganelon: Hardly a lot of mass.
(To Amadi): You think Dawn is telling you this.
(To Amadi): You get a sense of a face-full of cat.
Amadi wrinkles her nose.
Amadi wrinkles her nose.
Bear Soup Guy: brb
 
Squirrel wrinkles her nose as well.
Squirrel wrinkles her nose as well.
Kyrule: This is the result of a large rift, spreading its corruption through the land. Left unchecked, it would take out the entire world, until all remaining surrounding forces are all too weak to draw it further.
 
Radek: You...
KYRULE
Radek holds a hand to his forehead and tries to focus on the glowing horizon.
This is the result of a large rift, spreading its corruption through the land. Left unchecked, it would take out the entire world, until all remaining surrounding forces are all too weak to draw it further.
Radek: I'm supposed to close ''this''?
 
Kyrule: It's a bit of a hike to the thing itself. We couldn't come out closer due to the... distortions.
RADEK
The Gravedigger: Why haven't ''you''? If you know it's here.
You...
Apheori (GM): That ... should be a word.
(he holds a hand to his forehead and tries to focus on the glowing horizon)
I dunno what the word is.
I'm supposed to close ''this''?
Something like 'gravitational', but bigger, encompassing more things, including gravity.
 
And reality.
KYRULE
And... stuff.
It's a bit of a hike to the thing itself. We couldn't come out closer due to the space-time dimensional distortions.
Frezak (GM): Distortion is a word.
 
Apheori (GM): Right, but it's a something distortion.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Frezak (GM): Dimensional?
Why haven't ''you''? If you know it's here.
Planar?
 
Apheori (GM): Space-time dimensional distortions.
KYRULE
That's what she said. Totally. shifty eyes
Technically I really don't. Strictly-speaking.
Does /this/ do anything too?
But this hole is new, existing within the general timeline for only a few weeks. It is an opportunity, and should your methds fail, then indeed I will need to close it through my own means.
Pfft.
 
Ellemerr: I'm very annoyed.
Rhu tries to ask Hazz what he makes of all of this. ''(rolled 12 religion)''
Also very nearly made Amadi very annoyed.
 
Apheori (GM): Oh?
RADEK
Ellemerr: I don't like them taking my stars.
Let me see the rift itself.
Apheori (GM): Oh, aye.
 
Ganelon: She prizes those asterisks.
KYRULE
Apheori (GM): Especially since they didn't even take them CORRECTLY.
Stay close.
Ganelon: I wonder, though...
 
Does this work?
Kyrule leads the way toward the glow, picking around the dead trees and various rocks and crap.
Apheori (GM): Normally they bold, if anything. Italics is just wrong.
 
Ganelon: ...Wow.
The others follow, and Radek tries to use Gravy to support his own failing sense of balance, though this may or may not actually help.
Skype's italic format, _this_, is nice.
 
But four asterisks in Roll20 leads to normal text.
Amadi gives Radek curious looks as they go.
So you can't even go overboard. It's infallible.
 
Asterisks not allowed.
AMADI
Apheori (GM): Ghuh.
If you want a ride, you just have to ask, you know. Actually, I'm not even sure you need to ask. Gravy, can I have a ride?
Ellemerr: You use asteriks for everything here. One set is italics, two is bold... three is both. There's no underline, to my knowledge.
 
Apheori (GM): That is horrible.
SQUIRREL
Ganelon: No underlines, and no strikethrough.
(echoing Amadi)
Apheori (GM): Why can't they use standard formats, or even just use buttons, like everyone else? >.
If you want a ride, you just have to ask, you know. Actually, I'm not even sure you need to ask. Gravy, can I have a ride?
>.>
 
Ganelon: I guess you can still do ~this~?
Apheori (GM): Ew.
Ellemerr: Meh. MEH!
Frezak (GM): blargh!
Ganelon: I appreciate tildes. They're a good way to denote speaking in a non-common language.
Apheori (GM): Oh, aye.
They did work well for that.
Still look gross in general, though. >.>
Ellemerr: And R20 doesn't approve of >brackets< either.
Frezak (GM):
Ellemerr: ANYWAY!
Apheori (GM): RIGHT.
Kyrule said, "It's a bit of a hike to the thing itself. We couldn't come out closer due to the space-time dimensional distortions.
Gravy said, "Why haven't you (closed it)? If you know it's here. "
Kyrule: Technically I really don't.
Strictly-speaking.
Apheori (GM): This is a really convoluted mess.
Also someone should ask how long this hole has even been here.
Or something.
Kyrule: But this hole is new, existing within the general timeline for only a few weeks. It is an opportunity, and should your methds fail, then indeed I will need to close it through my own means.
Apheori (GM): I CAN WORDAGE.
Gaurav: I'm going to check with Hazz' to see what he makes of this.
Apheori (GM): Oh dear.
Rhu: rolling d20+10 religion check with Hazz' on this hole.
(
2
)
+10
= 12
Ellemerr: Oh dear indeed.
Gaurav: Some roll.
Apheori (GM): Hmmmmmmmm.
Hmmmm.
Hmmm.
Rhu's all made up with Hazz, is he?
Bear Soup Guy: Evidently not.
Apheori (GM): Heheh.
Gaurav: BSG: Hee.
Apheori (GM): Yeah, nothing comes of that.
Gaurav: Um, I guess he's willing to ask him a question at this point.
Ellemerr: phone
Gaurav: Not trust him or obey him or anything, just ask.
Radek: Let me see the rift itself.
Kyrule: Stay close.
Radek tries to use Gravy to support his own failing sense of balance.
Ganelon: Not sure whether he'd even notice if he weren't looking.
Frezak (GM): How would you even do that?
Kyrule leads everyone toward the glow, picking a way around the dead trees and various rocks and crap. Blah blah.
Ganelon: What do you mean?
Gravy's a big, sturdy dude.
Ellemerr: Phonecall paused. Will resume once Anna (who says "Hi!" to y'all and particularly Frezak) has talked with some other people. Yes.
Ganelon: It's like putting your hand on a wall to lean on.
Frezak (GM): How does a tiny old man use a giant as a support?
Yeah, but the wall moves.
Suppose you could lean on his shield.
That will be replaced with a sarcophagus lid as soon as I get to do that.
Amadi gives Radek curious looks.
Amadi: If you want a ride, you just have to ask, you know. Actually, I'm not even sure you need to ask. Gravy, can I have a ride?
Apheori (GM): What do you need to get to do that?
Frezak (GM): A sarcophagus with a lid.
Or magic.
Squirrel repeats everything Amadi just said.
Frezak (GM): I'm a god, it's part of the image.
I'll do it when no-one is looking.
Gravy grabs Amadi and places her in the correct position.
Gravy grabs Amadi and places her in the correct position.
Radek: I don't need a ''ride'', I just...
 
RADEK
I don't need a ''ride'', I just...
 
Amadi whees and throws a cupcake at Squirrel.
Amadi whees and throws a cupcake at Squirrel.
Radek: Pfah, never mind.
 
RADEK
Pfah, never mind.
 
Squirrel whees and throws a cupcake at Radek.
Squirrel whees and throws a cupcake at Radek.
Greibel chuckles
 
Ganelon: A cupcake? Bah!
Greibel chuckles.
Bah!
 
I wish I had the skills to dodge or deflect that.
AMADI
Frezak (GM): You have a reflex defense.
You just... don't know exactly how to stay on your feet? Teleportation-sickness? Or is it the intricate artfulness of this exquisite landscape that is messing with your otherwise impressive head?
Apheori (GM): Alas.
 
Ganelon: That actually is my highest defense, so fair enough.
SQUIRREL
Frezak (GM): Presumaby that indicates reflexes.
Daeh evisserpmi esiwrehto ruoy htiw gnissem si taht epacsdnal etisiuqxe siht fo ssenluftra etacirtni eht ti si ro? Ssenkcis-noitatropelet? Teef ruoy no yats ot woh yltcaxe wonk t'nod... tsuj uoy?
Amadi: You just... don't know exactly how to stay on your feet? Teleportation-sickness? Or is it the intricate artfulness of this exquisite landscape that is messing with your otherwise impressive head?
 
The Gravedigger: It '''is''' a pretty great head.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Squirrel repears Amadi's line backwards.
It '''is''' a pretty great head.
Squirrel: t
(to Amadi, despite beng right next to Radek)
The Gravedigger: Don't tell him I said that, it'll go to it.
Don't tell him I said that, it'll go to it.
Frezak (GM): Said to Amadi despite the fact that he's in arms reach of Radek.
 
Kyrule: In your timeline it would have been a few hundred years since these events, but leaving a rift like this open for so long would probably have spelled the end of the world.
KYRULE
In your timeline it would have been a few hundred years since these events, but leaving a rift like this open for so long would probably have spelled the end of the world.
According to our histories it was closed, here, on this day, though the exact details will be open to interpretation.
According to our histories it was closed, here, on this day, though the exact details will be open to interpretation.
Frezak (GM): What's the dirt here like?
 
Apheori (GM): Terrible.
RADEK
It's dry and glassy, and in some places it's even a bit bubbly.
Then... you're having us fulfill history.
Radek: Then... you're having us fulfill history.
 
Frezak (GM): THIS HOLE MUST BE ENDED
KYRULE
Kyrule: Yes.
Yes. One way or another.
One way or another.
 
Ganelon: He doesn't answer Amadi mostly because he doesn't want to admit that he's all woozy.
The scenery gets worse as they progress inward, the landscape weirder, the sky scarier. Even the dirt is terrible, dry and glassy. Large bubbles of solid mud poke up in some places.
Frezak (GM): We ARE in the process of moving towards teh thingy, right?
 
Apheori (GM): Silly Radek. He mustn't like doctors much.
There are cracks in the ground now, deep glowing crevices where the earth has split. Most are small, no more than a few cm, easy to step across, or certainly jumpable, but others... others form ravines meters across, and as they navigate their way down the twisting spiral of sundered earth, the pattern becomes clear. The source is at the centre of all this, the middle. The twisting horror, full of voices and shadows, memories and possibilities, all wrong, wrong, wrong.
Yeah.
 
You're approaching!
The dirt is becoming even difficult to distinguish as dirt.
The landscape is getting weirder, the sky scarier.
 
There are cracks in the ground now, great glowing crevices where the earth has split. Most are small, no more than a few cm, easy to step across, or certainly jumpable, but others... others form ravines meters across, and as you navigate your way down the twisting spiral of sundered earth, the pattern becomes clear. It's at the centre of all this, the middle. The twisting horror, full of voices and shadows, memories and possibilities, all wrong, wrong, wrong.
Radek stops to take a sample of the horribly dirt. It's like stone, but sharper, finer, and he winds up having to chip off a chunk with a chisel.
Frezak (GM): The dirt rubbishier?
 
Apheori (GM): It's getting horrible.
As they continue on, there are whispers around them, and distant shouts, but nothing is all that distinguishable. Shapes, too, follow in the corners of their vision - shadows moving of their own accords, some glowing with the same weird un-light as everything else, some... not.
Frezak (GM): Boooo!
 
Ganelon: ...
Greibel takes it all in like a really deep art installation.
Apheori (GM): Becoming even difficult to distinguish as dirt.
 
Ganelon: I'm going to take some horrible dirt back with me.
The Gravedigger looks at Radek to do something smart.
Apheori (GM): It's like stone, but glassy. You wind up having to chip off a chunk with something.
 
Like a chisel or trowel or whatever.
They come to a ravine that's more sideways than the others, forming a bit of a cave entrance, glowing. Horribly.
Ganelon: Horrible!
 
Gaurav: Can we actually hear the voices and shadows?
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Apheori (GM): You hear whispers, and distant shouts, but nothing is all that distinguishable, unless Gravy or Greibel actually want to distinguish it.
This is a mess.
Frezak (GM): Not really!
 
Apheori (GM): It also feels like you're being trailed by shadows in the corners of your vision, strange shapes moving on their own accord, some glowing with the same weird un-light as everything else, some... not.
KYRULE
Bear Soup Guy: Greibel is content to take it all in like a really deep art installation
Ye-es...
Apheori (GM): Duuude.
 
That would be awesome.
RADEK
If thissort of ambiance could be preserved...
This is... ''light'' is bleeding through from other dimensions.
Bear Soup Guy: Yes
 
Yes it would
AMADI
Alas I am no animator
Yes! Innit shiny?
Apheori (GM): Hmm.
(she giggles and follows some shadows with her finger)
Frezak (GM): Pickles!
Shiiiiny.
Bear Soup Guy: If any of you are animators and want to animate it
 
I will record ambient music that will be fitting fo rit
Frezak (GM): Gravy just looks at Radek to do something smart.
Apheori (GM): You come to a rift that's more sideways than the others, forming a bit of a cave entrance.
Er, ravine.
Crevice.
Thing.
It's also glowing horribly.
D20s!
Frezak (GM): Cool.
rolling 1D20
(
8
)
= 8
Ganelon: Okay, so... I forget if something was necessarily wrong with the latest method I devices to close these things.
Rhu: rolling d20
(
12
)
= 12
Ganelon: That being energy-to-reality synthesis.
rolling 1d20
(
3
)
= 3
Amadi: rolling 1d20
(
12
)
= 12
Ganelon: Aaaaagh
Apheori (GM) shrugs.
Apheori (GM): I dunno!
Bear Soup Guy: rolling 1d20
(
16
)
= 16
Ganelon: Also I said "devices" when I meant "devised".
This is why I spoke of my distraction earlier.
Apheori (GM): Greibel, Radek, and Amadi: The shadows aren't there. The voices aren't there. You're seeing through the world, to elsewhere, another side, other places. You get a sense that you could almost fall through, even...
Gravy: It doesn't see you. Yet.
The Gravedigger: This is a mess.
Kyrule: Ye-es...
Radek: This is... ''light'' is bleeding through from other dimensions.
Amadi: Yes! Innit shiny?
Amadi giggles and follows some shadows with her finger.
Amadi: Shiiiiny.
Squirrel giggles and wraps a shadow in another shadow.
Squirrel giggles and wraps a shadow in another shadow.
Frezak (GM): Dammit, and I know EXACTLY what that's like!
 
Squirrel: Shiiiiny.
SQIRREL
Frezak (GM): Stop it!
Shiiiiny.
Apheori (GM): Frezak: What're you referring to?
 
Radek: So it's true, then.
RADEK
Frezak (GM): The "shiiiiny" part as coming from the hag.
So it's true, then. I truly could create a bridge between worlds like this...
Radek: I truly could create a bridge between worlds like this...
 
Amadi: Or a gate or an elevator or... maybe even a river.
AMADI
The Gravedigger: Maybe when the universe isn't falling to bits, hmm?
Or a gate or an elevator or... maybe even a river.
Squirrel: Or a well or a portal or... maybe even a moribundis.
 
Amadi nods sagely to herself and Squirrel. Who probably nods just as sagely back.
SQIRREL
Apheori (GM): Exactly.
Or a well or a portal or... maybe even a moribundis.
Kyrule: You could, but for now it would be better to focus on the immediate problems.
 
Radek: Ah. Y-yes, of course.
Amadi nods sagely to herself and Squirrel, who nods just as sagely back.
Gaurav: I like how Gravy's now the guy who stops Radek from destroying the universe.
 
Frezak (GM): Someone has to!
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Kyrule should have just pointed at Gravy and said, "What he said."
Maybe when the universe isn't falling to bits, hmm?
Apheori (GM): Half of the party are gods.
 
This is a little disturbing.
KYRULE
Do you enter the ravine cavern?
You could, but for now it would be better to focus on the immediate problems.
Frezak (GM): Looks like it.
 
Ganelon: I guess we have to.
RADEK
Apheori (GM): BWAHAHAHAH.
Ah. Y-yes, of course.
Gaurav: Rhu's just going to follow Gravy and Radek wherever they go.
 
Apheori (GM): Your DM is busy eating whipped cream and will actually write up what happens when you do in a moment.
They head inside.
Frezak (GM): To hell and back!
 
Apheori (GM): Mmmm, whipped cream.
 
Amadi's eating ice cream, right?
INT. Great rift at Sanessee - caverns
Amadi eats a bananasplit ice cream with whipped cream, vanilla cream and chocolate sauce.
 
Apheori (GM): Cool.
The entrance to the caverns is a narrow passage angling down into the glow, where the earth has literally split. Here, the glow is fainter, or perhaps it's simply permeating everything now, no escape. The soft vibrating that the party feels in their bones, it's nothing more than the humming air, handsaws twanging, cats purring too many to hear.
Squirrel eats a really thick ice cream baileys frappuccino.
 
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Amadi is eating a bananasplit ice cream with whipped cream, vanilla cream and chocolate sauce.
Um.
 
Er.
Squirrel is eating a really thick ice cream baileys frappuccino.
 
RHU
Is it supposed to be this ... shivery?
 
RADEK
...Dreadful. Nothing here is as it's supposed to be.
 
KYRULE
(murmuring)
They went in here, just the two of them, alone, with only the thin tether of need to guide them. I sent them to their deaths... and worse.
Fucking hells.
 
Rhu doesn't hear this, or at least pretends not to.
 
THE GRAVEDIGGER
HEY RHU, DID YOU YEAR THAT SCARY OMINOUS STUFF THAT GOD JUST SAID?
 
Rhu doesn't hear this either, or at least pretends not to.
 
As they head down the passage, it seems to be getting darker, or possibly lighter. Eyesight fades.
 
Amadi gets distracted by something. She seems to be listening to something.
 
Squirrel gets distracted by something else, but she's more just skipping about, singing silently.
 
Then nobody can see anything anymore. There is only blackness and no light, only solitude and no others. They find themselves alone, completely isolated in the black, nothing to do or be or see.
 
But they just were right there, the others all around...
 
They all basically stop at this point, standing around in the darkness waiting.
 
'''''Gaurav''' (Rhu): Rhu's pretty used to being in weird caves by now. He's not going to panic unless giant fish show up.
 
Something huge and fishy falls on Rhu, knocking him over. ''(rolled 12 reality vs something)''
 
RHU
Ah!
 
RADEK
...Rhu? Are you still there?
 
Rhu scrambles out from under the thing and runs into the Gravedigger's legs.
 
RHU
Holy... what the hack was that thing?!
 
Rhu gets up and tries to get closer look at the thing that fell on him, fishing a light out of his bag.
 
AMADI
That was a giant fish! That you don't want to look at! It's like... y'know... shadows cast by shapeless nothings and... hungers. Except it needs light. Wants light. I think.
 
SQUIRREL
(at the exact same time as Amadi)
That was a giant fish! That you don't want to look at! It's like... y'know... shadows cast by shapeless nothings and... hungers. Except it needs light. Wants light. I think.
 
Rhu turns on his torch, illuminating the fish and a bit of the surrounding passage.
 
AMADI
...Oh, you have light. That's... great?
 
SQUIRREL
(at the exact same time as Amadi)
...Oh, you have light. That's... great?
 
RHU
What?!
 
Rhu turns his light off, and at the same time, Kyrule floods the passage with even stronger light, light like daylight with no apparent source.
 
KYRULE
Light travels too slowly to turn it off now.
 
AMADI
...I guess that works.
 
SQIRREL
I suppose it works.
 
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Aaagh light!
 
KYRULE
The shadows. The light will keep them at bay, but at the same time, it also gives them form. In the darkness, they have no power, for there is nothing to cast their edges. In the light... in the memory of light, they can only eat.
 
RHU
Is this where the giant fish on Sarathi came from?
 
KYRULE
No.
It's messing with you, trying to find an opening. Guard your minds. It will seek to exploit any weakness, open any wound.
 
AMADI
My mind is ''so'' guarded. I've got, like, archers and pots of boiling oil. Also, the princess is in another castle.
 
SQIRREL
(at the same time as Amadi)
My mind isn't guarded. I've got, like, sparrows and a piece of cheese. Also, the princes are all dead.
 
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Why?
 
KYRULE
There is a presense, an... other within the darkness. I have sensed it a few times, though I do not know... what it is.
 
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Have you asked?
 
KYRULE
Not successfully. Communication exists on different levels, but this... presense, if it even is, is so alien that I do not know where to begin.
 
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Hmm.
Hmm.
You enter, and it seems that here, the glow is fainter, or perhaps it's simply permeating everything now, no escape. The soft vibrating that you feel in your bones, it's nothing more than the humming air, handsaws twanging, cats purring too many to hear.
 
Frezak (GM): I really don't like that.
AMADI
Apheori (GM): Hmm.
We should try. Should we try?
Frezak (GM): That last line sounds like some WoD shizzle.
 
Apheori (GM): You're in a bit of a narrow passage angling down into the glow, where the earth literally split.
The Gravedigger nods thoughtfully, then breathes in, in a gravylike fashion.
Rhu: Is it supposed to be this ... shivery?
 
Ellemerr: Man, I'm stealing that line for WoD.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Frezak (GM): Gaaah!
(booming down the passage)
Radek: ...Dreadful.
HEEEEELLOOOOOOOO?
Nothing here is as it's supposed to be.
 
Kyrule: (murmuring) They went in here, just the two of them, alone, with only the thin tether of need to guide them. I sent them to their deaths... and worse.
The shadows at the edge of the light roil with need, straining at the light, sharpest at its edges, but unable to come any closer.
Fucking hells.
 
(From Ellemerr): Do I know what she's talking about?
KYRULE
(To Ellemerr): Vardaman and Ariel. It was recent; they went in looking for a piece of something... and you would know because Ariel was one of yours. Vardaman was one of mine, and Ariel one of yours, and we lost them both.
Break down meanings into patterns, break down patterns into something else, and perhaps, perhaps you could try.
Gaurav: I'm just going to assume Rhu didn't hear that. It'd make him unnecessarily nervous.
Frezak (GM): Gravy goes "HEY RHU DID YOU YEAR THAT SCARY OMINOUS STUFF THAT GOD JUST SAID?"
Or not.
Apheori (GM): DO IT.
Frezak (GM): Are gonna need light?
Gaurav: hahahahaahah
Ellemerr: phone
Apheori (GM): Noooooooo!
Uh, okay.
You keep going, Amadi is distracted by something, Squirrel is distracted by something else, and gods dammit I need to pee.
It seems to be getting darker, or possibly lighter, but seeing is getting difficult.
Uhhhh.
This is weird as arse.
Gaurav: It is.
Apheori (GM): Drink!
I may have forgotten something very important.
I should have drawn a map.
I'm sorry.
Y'all cannot see. There is only blackness and no light, only solitude and no others. You feel alone, completely isolated in the black, nothing to do or be or see.
But you just were right there, the others all around...
Gaurav: Rhu's pretty used to being in weird caves by now.
He's not going to panic unless giant fish show up.
Rhu: rolling d20
(
12
)
= 12
Apheori (GM): Something huge and fishy falls on Rhu, knocking him over.
Rhu: Ah!
Apheori (GM): Also you all hear that./
You just can't see anything.
Radek: ...Rhu? Are you still there?
Rhu scrambles out from under the thing.
Apheori (GM): Rhu runs into Gravy's legs.
Rhu: Holy ...
What the hack was that thing?!
Frezak (GM): There's a cultist in my legs!
Apheori (GM): Can I steal Ellemerr's character?
Gaurav: Gravy's Holy Legs
Ellemerr: yes
Apheori (GM): Alternately, can I tell you to say something about something?
Ellemerr: yes
(To Ellemerr): Something about how if there's light, they won't like what they see. Shadows with no form, horror that hungers in the light...
(To Ellemerr): But of course there will be light or something.
(To Ellemerr): I don't know.
Frezak (GM): Is Greibel's bong still glwoing?
*glowing?
Apheori (GM): Nope.
Frezak (GM): Aaaw
Apheori (GM): Sorry.
Gaurav: We still have our space-elf lights and stuff, don't we?
Apheori (GM): You should. Want to activate one?
Rhu gets up, and tries to get closer look at the thing that fell on him.
Apheori (GM): You can't see anything.
Amadi: That was a giant fish! That you don't want to look at! It's like... y'know... shadows cast by shapeless nothings and... hungers. Except it needs light. Wants light. I think.
Rhu: rolling d20+15 perception check after turning on his space-elf light thing
(
13
)
+15
= 28
Gaurav: Um.
Amadi: ... Oh, you have light.
That's... great?
Rhu: What?!
Apheori (GM): Squirrel says everything Amadi does at the same time.
Rhu turns his light off.
Gaurav: Deep dread warnings in stereo.
Apheori (GM): Man, if only I could just kill you all for that. Except that wouldn't actually be funny.
Kyrule floods the passage with light at the same time as Rhu turns his off.
Gaurav: You can kill Rhu if you like. He's used to it.
Kyrule: Light travels too slowly to turn it off now.
Amadi: ... I guess that works.
Squirrel: I suppose it works.
The Gravedigger: Aaagh light!
Kyrule: The shadows. The light will keep them at bay, but at the same time, it also gives them form. In the darkness, they have no power, for there is nothing to cast their edges. In the light... in the memory of light, they can only eat.
Rhu: Is this where the giant fish on Sarathi came from?o
Kyrule: No.
It's messing with you, trying to find an opening.
Guard your minds. It will seek to exploit any weakness, open any wound.
The Gravedigger: Why?
Amadi: My mind is ''so'' guarded. I've got, like, archers and pots of boiling oil. Also, the princess is in another castle.
Kyrule: There is a presense, an... other within the darkness. I have sensed it a few times, though I do not know... what it is.
Frezak (GM): IS THE PRINCESS A DRAGON?
Squirrel: (at the same time as Amadi) My mind isn't guarded. I've got, like, sparrows and a piece of cheese. Also, the princes are all dead.
The Gravedigger: Have you asked?
Kyrule: Not successfully.
Communication exists on different levels, but this... presense, if it even is the same one, is so alien that I do not know where to begin.
The Gravedigger: Hmm.
Amadi: We should try. Should we try?
The Gravedigger nods thoughtfully
Frezak (GM): Gravy breathes in, in a gravylike fashion
The Gravedigger: HEEEEELLOOOOOOOO?
Apheori (GM): The shadows at the edge of the light roil with need, straining at the light, sharpest at its edges, but unable to come any closer.
Gaurav: Can we see the giant fish clearly now in all the light?
Kyrule: Break down meanings into patterns, break down patterns into something else, and perhaps, perhaps you could try.
I once tried speaking to Kyrule in this way. He did not like it.
I once tried speaking to Kyrule in this way. He did not like it.
Amadi nods knowingly.
Amadi nods knowingly.
Apheori (GM): The giant fish is clearly a giant fish, but it also looks a bit transparentish.
 
(To Amadi): For extra hilarity, it was you-not-you who indirectly taught this Kyrule how to do that in the first place.
RADEK
Frezak (GM): Transparenfish
Patterns, you say.
(From Amadi): Such hilarity. nodnods
 
(To Amadi): Very.
KYRULE
Gaurav: Is it a dead giant fish, then? I imagined it writhing or something.
The mathematics are extremely complex, so much that even the Book could not parse it.
Apheori (GM): It's dead.
Brute forcing it didn't work either, of course.  
Maybe it writhed before.
It's dead now.
Radek: Patterns, you say.
The Gravedigger: Interpretative dance?
Gaurav: Are we having this conversation standing around the dead fish, or have we resumed walking through to the other end of this tunnel thing? Because I'd like to get out of here.
Kyrule: The mathematics are extremely complex, so much that even the Book could not parse it.
Brute forcing it didn't work either, of course.
And I love brute forcing things.
And I love brute forcing things.
Dancing might do it, for all I know.
 
Amadi: Did I try bribery? I should've tried bribery.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Kyrule: If it's the right kind of dance.
Interpretative dance?
Ballet didn't.
 
KYRULE
Dancing might do it, for all I know. If it's the right kind of dance. Ballet didn't.
 
Kyrule goes up on a toe for emphasis.
Kyrule goes up on a toe for emphasis.
The Gravedigger: Maybe you need a beard.
 
Kyrule suddenly has a really long, white beard.
AMADI
Kyrule strokes it consideringly.
Did I try bribery? I should've tried bribery.
Apheori (GM): It's a beard to rival Radek's own.
 
Squirrel mouths the words, but doesn't actually say them this time.
 
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Maybe you need a beard.
 
Kyrule suddenly obtains a really long, white beard, and strokes it consideringly. It's a beard to rival Radek's own.
 
Radek strokes his own beard competitively.
Radek strokes his own beard competitively.
Gaurav: It's a beard-off!
 
Kyrule takes up the challenge, upping the ante with competitive beard stroking.
Kyrule takes up the challenge, upping the ante with even more competitive beard stroking.
Squirrel: (to Amadi) Or a brewery!
 
Amadi: ... Both?
SQIRREL
Squirrel: Both?
(to Amadi)
Gaurav: I'm going to have to leave in 10-15mins, but if you want to keep going, Rhu's now-readable character sheet is at https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u/19429772/dnd-skype/Rhu.pdf
Or a brewery!
Ellemerr: I'm, as usual, going to need sleep.
 
Apheori (GM): Also I assume a this point everyone's just sort of standing around.
AMADI
Because nevermind reality falling apart or your so important mission, there was a FISH! And BEARDS!
...Both?
Should we just conclude the beard-off and then pick up here next time?
 
Bear Soup Guy: Seems like a good place for it
SQIRREL
Apheori (GM): Would anyone here make a good impartial judge to settle the beard dispute?
Both?
Gaurav: Hazz'ridan the Magnificent
 
Bear Soup Guy: ^
The bearding intensifies as Radek and Kyrule attempt to out-beard each other.
Gaurav: If someone asks me, I'll pray to Hazz' for this.
 
me -> Rhu
Kyrule wins. ''(rolled 17 beard vs 16 Radek beard roll)''
Ganelon: Alright.
 
What do I roll to beard?
Kyrule looks slightly apologetic and then loses the beard a moment later.
Apheori (GM): Uh... charisma?
</screenplay>
...what the hell does Kyrule roll?
Ganelon: Okay, I'm treating this as a trained charisma-based skill.
rolling 1d20+5+3
(
8
)
+5+3
= 16
That's training + 1/2 level. Radek has no Cha bonus.
Apheori (GM): She probably does, but I have no idea what it would be. >.>
...she rolled a natural 17. I think she wins. >.>
I'm sorry.
Getting into competitions with gods seems not to end well.
Gaurav: I assume Radek doesn't have to recognise her victory. Even if he knows in his heart that her beard was better.
Kyrule looks slightly apologetic and then loses the beard.
Ganelon: Alas.
Apheori (GM): Okay, so next week?
Can everyone do that?
Ganelon: Yeah.
I should be far less busy then.
Ellemerr: I foresee no obstacles.
Gaurav: I'll be there!
Frezak (GM): Yyyyep
Apheori (GM): Excellent.
We shall pick up here.
I do so love you guys.
Bear Soup Guy: You only want us for our ballet Jesus
Apheori (GM): I'm not saying one way or another.
Bear Soup Guy: It's okay, it's hard to cast blame. Ballet Jesus has that effect on people.
Frezak (GM): He's divine.  
</pre>


{{holes nav
{{holes nav

Revision as of 23:07, 8 April 2015

≪ PreviousNext ≫
Session 50 (raw log) (Overview)
EXT. Large, shaded tree clearing - evening
Along with Kyrule and midgets, the party is loitering around the tree, near the new grave. Greibel is nodding vaguely to himself. Amadi is eating ice cream, pretending this is all completely normal.
KYRULE
The hole awaits. Are you all ready?
DAWN
What about Djieka? Shouldn't he have a marker?
TREE
I got this, guys. I'll tell anyone who cares he's there. I am a GREAT tombstone.
Like that big dark thing buried even deeper, I mark that like nobody's business.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Thanks, Tree.
KYRULE
You're supposed to be guarding that, not marking it.
TREE
Yeah, yeah, it's all bugs.
RHU
...big dark thing?
TREE
Oh, you know. It's big. And dark. And all that. Huge, like.
Rhu gives everybody a "huh?" look. It is probably indistinguishable from his usual expression.
RADEK
...Guarding, you say. From outsiders, or for the sake of outsiders?
KYRULE
Yes.
Radek smirks.
Ganelon (Radek): You might think that's a cryptic answer, but it explains everything!
TREE
Well, you know. They buried it, they forgot about it, they pretended it was never there.
Pretty easy when the entire history got rewrote, that.
RHU
Who buried... what? Exactly?
GREIBEL
Oh come on, Rhu. Keep up, man. The big horrible thing.
TREE
Yeaah, man, you'll...
KYRULE
(interrupting the tree)
Vivek, stop talking, please.
RHU
(to Greibel)
What big horrible thing? We have enough big horrible things. We don't need more big horrible things.
GREIBEL
That's why they buried it, man.
RHU
Oh.
TREE
Yeah, man. That.
Kyrule eyes the tree suspiciously.
Amadi takes a sip of tea and turns to whoever's closest. This turns out to be Dawn.
AMADI
Yes, Kyrule is still being terribly rude. Some people just never change. And gods are the worst. It goes with the job; having to represent things and stuff.
DAWN
So what do we represent?
Amadi takes another sip of tea, gets it down wrong and starts coughing like crazy.
The Gravedigger slaps Amadi on the back with a Gravy-sized hand. This doesn't entirely work and nearly knocks her over, so he then takes Dawn's hand and uses that to pat Amadi on the back.
Amadi stops choking.
AMADI
(coughing)
Thanks.
DAWN
Oing?
KYRULE
One last thing before we head out, then. We'll need to leave behind an anchor, something to mark this place and time in order to return to it.
I could try bribing a certain someone here with a lollipop, but at this point I believe your best option would be to have Dawn remain behind.
RHU
I... have a skull? Would that work?
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Byedavethanksseeya.
DAWN
Um... okay?
KYRULE
(to Dawn)
Just stay here. And don't wander off. Have a cat.
Kyrule hands Dawn a sphinx. This is a different sphinx from before - sleek-furred and tortoiseshell, with mottled wings.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Really time to leave now!
RADEK
...You had better take that back when we return. It's enough of a burden keeping Dawn in line.
DAWN
(staring at the sphinx)
Uh...
The sphinx purrs.
KYRULE
Of course.
RHU
It might be useful to have someone who can fly with us. And besides, she can fight. Sort of.
AMADI
How about Squirrel? She likes it here and everything.
Squirrel suddenly reappears at Amadi's mention.
Amadi gives Squirrel suspicious glances.
SQIRREL
Squirrel!
KYRULE
(she shakes her head)
You need someone who can stay put. Amadi's... key might work, however.
AMADI
Would not! If it stays, I stay, and I'm not staying.
KYRULE
You could use Dawn as a temporary key while binding your main form to this plane.
AMADI
Eeeew.
Amadi makes a disgusted face.
KYRULE
I'm not sure if that is entirely a good idea, of course.
The sphinx tries to climb Dawn's face and she falls over, covered in fur and wings.
KYRULE
Very well, then.
And then everyone, except for Dawn, gets transported to somewhere else.


EXT. Great rift at Sanessee - badlands
The party is taken to a dark expanse of not-quite land. The ground here is twisted, distorted, black and glassy, the clouds low and roiling, full of lightning with no thunder, tinted with yellow. Dead plants lie scorched against the ground, all pointing the same directon as though blown over from some great blast.
Glints of purple and yellow glow from cracks and crevices, under rocks, beneath their feet. The very shadows are glowing. Off in the distance, in the direction where the trees' trunks point, the same glow rises out of nothing, painting the clouds in horrible splashes of sickening colour.
Even here, they can hear it whispering.
Radek gets mild vertigo. (rolled 12 fort) He maintains his balance for now.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Gosh.
Amadi wrinkles her nose.
Squirrel wrinkles her nose as well.
KYRULE
This is the result of a large rift, spreading its corruption through the land. Left unchecked, it would take out the entire world, until all remaining surrounding forces are all too weak to draw it further.
RADEK
You...
(he holds a hand to his forehead and tries to focus on the glowing horizon)
I'm supposed to close this?
KYRULE
It's a bit of a hike to the thing itself. We couldn't come out closer due to the space-time dimensional distortions.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Why haven't you? If you know it's here.
KYRULE
Technically I really don't. Strictly-speaking.
But this hole is new, existing within the general timeline for only a few weeks. It is an opportunity, and should your methds fail, then indeed I will need to close it through my own means.
Rhu tries to ask Hazz what he makes of all of this. (rolled 12 religion)
RADEK
Let me see the rift itself.
KYRULE
Stay close.
Kyrule leads the way toward the glow, picking around the dead trees and various rocks and crap.
The others follow, and Radek tries to use Gravy to support his own failing sense of balance, though this may or may not actually help.
Amadi gives Radek curious looks as they go.
AMADI
If you want a ride, you just have to ask, you know. Actually, I'm not even sure you need to ask. Gravy, can I have a ride?
SQUIRREL
(echoing Amadi)
If you want a ride, you just have to ask, you know. Actually, I'm not even sure you need to ask. Gravy, can I have a ride?
Gravy grabs Amadi and places her in the correct position.
RADEK
I don't need a ride, I just...
Amadi whees and throws a cupcake at Squirrel.
RADEK
Pfah, never mind.
Squirrel whees and throws a cupcake at Radek.
Greibel chuckles.
AMADI
You just... don't know exactly how to stay on your feet? Teleportation-sickness? Or is it the intricate artfulness of this exquisite landscape that is messing with your otherwise impressive head?
SQUIRREL
Daeh evisserpmi esiwrehto ruoy htiw gnissem si taht epacsdnal etisiuqxe siht fo ssenluftra etacirtni eht ti si ro? Ssenkcis-noitatropelet? Teef ruoy no yats ot woh yltcaxe wonk t'nod... tsuj uoy?
THE GRAVEDIGGER
It is a pretty great head.
(to Amadi, despite beng right next to Radek)
Don't tell him I said that, it'll go to it.
KYRULE
In your timeline it would have been a few hundred years since these events, but leaving a rift like this open for so long would probably have spelled the end of the world.
According to our histories it was closed, here, on this day, though the exact details will be open to interpretation.
RADEK
Then... you're having us fulfill history.
KYRULE
Yes. One way or another.
The scenery gets worse as they progress inward, the landscape weirder, the sky scarier. Even the dirt is terrible, dry and glassy. Large bubbles of solid mud poke up in some places.
There are cracks in the ground now, deep glowing crevices where the earth has split. Most are small, no more than a few cm, easy to step across, or certainly jumpable, but others... others form ravines meters across, and as they navigate their way down the twisting spiral of sundered earth, the pattern becomes clear. The source is at the centre of all this, the middle. The twisting horror, full of voices and shadows, memories and possibilities, all wrong, wrong, wrong.
The dirt is becoming even difficult to distinguish as dirt.
Radek stops to take a sample of the horribly dirt. It's like stone, but sharper, finer, and he winds up having to chip off a chunk with a chisel.
As they continue on, there are whispers around them, and distant shouts, but nothing is all that distinguishable. Shapes, too, follow in the corners of their vision - shadows moving of their own accords, some glowing with the same weird un-light as everything else, some... not.
Greibel takes it all in like a really deep art installation.
The Gravedigger looks at Radek to do something smart.
They come to a ravine that's more sideways than the others, forming a bit of a cave entrance, glowing. Horribly.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
This is a mess.
KYRULE
Ye-es...
RADEK
This is... light is bleeding through from other dimensions.
AMADI
Yes! Innit shiny?
(she giggles and follows some shadows with her finger)
Shiiiiny.
Squirrel giggles and wraps a shadow in another shadow.
SQIRREL
Shiiiiny.
RADEK
So it's true, then. I truly could create a bridge between worlds like this...
AMADI
Or a gate or an elevator or... maybe even a river.
SQIRREL
Or a well or a portal or... maybe even a moribundis.
Amadi nods sagely to herself and Squirrel, who nods just as sagely back.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Maybe when the universe isn't falling to bits, hmm?
KYRULE
You could, but for now it would be better to focus on the immediate problems.
RADEK
Ah. Y-yes, of course.
They head inside.


INT. Great rift at Sanessee - caverns
The entrance to the caverns is a narrow passage angling down into the glow, where the earth has literally split. Here, the glow is fainter, or perhaps it's simply permeating everything now, no escape. The soft vibrating that the party feels in their bones, it's nothing more than the humming air, handsaws twanging, cats purring too many to hear.
Amadi is eating a bananasplit ice cream with whipped cream, vanilla cream and chocolate sauce.
Squirrel is eating a really thick ice cream baileys frappuccino.
RHU
Is it supposed to be this ... shivery?
RADEK
...Dreadful. Nothing here is as it's supposed to be.
KYRULE
(murmuring)
They went in here, just the two of them, alone, with only the thin tether of need to guide them. I sent them to their deaths... and worse.
Fucking hells.
Rhu doesn't hear this, or at least pretends not to.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
HEY RHU, DID YOU YEAR THAT SCARY OMINOUS STUFF THAT GOD JUST SAID?
Rhu doesn't hear this either, or at least pretends not to.
As they head down the passage, it seems to be getting darker, or possibly lighter. Eyesight fades.
Amadi gets distracted by something. She seems to be listening to something.
Squirrel gets distracted by something else, but she's more just skipping about, singing silently.
Then nobody can see anything anymore. There is only blackness and no light, only solitude and no others. They find themselves alone, completely isolated in the black, nothing to do or be or see.
But they just were right there, the others all around...
They all basically stop at this point, standing around in the darkness waiting.
Gaurav (Rhu): Rhu's pretty used to being in weird caves by now. He's not going to panic unless giant fish show up.
Something huge and fishy falls on Rhu, knocking him over. (rolled 12 reality vs something)
RHU
Ah!
RADEK
...Rhu? Are you still there?
Rhu scrambles out from under the thing and runs into the Gravedigger's legs.
RHU
Holy... what the hack was that thing?!
Rhu gets up and tries to get closer look at the thing that fell on him, fishing a light out of his bag.
AMADI
That was a giant fish! That you don't want to look at! It's like... y'know... shadows cast by shapeless nothings and... hungers. Except it needs light. Wants light. I think.
SQUIRREL
(at the exact same time as Amadi)
That was a giant fish! That you don't want to look at! It's like... y'know... shadows cast by shapeless nothings and... hungers. Except it needs light. Wants light. I think.
Rhu turns on his torch, illuminating the fish and a bit of the surrounding passage.
AMADI
...Oh, you have light. That's... great?
SQUIRREL
(at the exact same time as Amadi)
...Oh, you have light. That's... great?
RHU
What?!
Rhu turns his light off, and at the same time, Kyrule floods the passage with even stronger light, light like daylight with no apparent source.
KYRULE
Light travels too slowly to turn it off now.
AMADI
...I guess that works.
SQIRREL
I suppose it works.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Aaagh light!
KYRULE
The shadows. The light will keep them at bay, but at the same time, it also gives them form. In the darkness, they have no power, for there is nothing to cast their edges. In the light... in the memory of light, they can only eat.
RHU
Is this where the giant fish on Sarathi came from?
KYRULE
No.
It's messing with you, trying to find an opening. Guard your minds. It will seek to exploit any weakness, open any wound.
AMADI
My mind is so guarded. I've got, like, archers and pots of boiling oil. Also, the princess is in another castle.
SQIRREL
(at the same time as Amadi)
My mind isn't guarded. I've got, like, sparrows and a piece of cheese. Also, the princes are all dead.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Why?
KYRULE
There is a presense, an... other within the darkness. I have sensed it a few times, though I do not know... what it is.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Have you asked?
KYRULE
Not successfully. Communication exists on different levels, but this... presense, if it even is, is so alien that I do not know where to begin.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Hmm.
AMADI
We should try. Should we try?
The Gravedigger nods thoughtfully, then breathes in, in a gravylike fashion.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
(booming down the passage)
HEEEEELLOOOOOOOO?
The shadows at the edge of the light roil with need, straining at the light, sharpest at its edges, but unable to come any closer.
KYRULE
Break down meanings into patterns, break down patterns into something else, and perhaps, perhaps you could try.
I once tried speaking to Kyrule in this way. He did not like it.
Amadi nods knowingly.
RADEK
Patterns, you say.
KYRULE
The mathematics are extremely complex, so much that even the Book could not parse it.
Brute forcing it didn't work either, of course.
And I love brute forcing things.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Interpretative dance?
KYRULE
Dancing might do it, for all I know. If it's the right kind of dance. Ballet didn't.
Kyrule goes up on a toe for emphasis.
AMADI
Did I try bribery? I should've tried bribery.
Squirrel mouths the words, but doesn't actually say them this time.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Maybe you need a beard.
Kyrule suddenly obtains a really long, white beard, and strokes it consideringly. It's a beard to rival Radek's own.
Radek strokes his own beard competitively.
Kyrule takes up the challenge, upping the ante with even more competitive beard stroking.
SQIRREL
(to Amadi)
Or a brewery!
AMADI
...Both?
SQIRREL
Both?
The bearding intensifies as Radek and Kyrule attempt to out-beard each other.
Kyrule wins. (rolled 17 beard vs 16 Radek beard roll)
Kyrule looks slightly apologetic and then loses the beard a moment later.


≪ PreviousNext ≫
Session 50 (Overview)
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Just because you don't understand what I'm doing or you find it weird doesn't make it wrong or illegal. I do mixed media art out of my van. Cops look at me like I'm a fucking alien.