Difference between revisions of "Holes/Session 6"

A fragment of the Garden of Remembering
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<screenplay>
<screenplay>
EXT. Village - day
EXT. Village of Hughenden - day


While Radek talks to the villagers, the rest of the party mills about in the dustiness of the street. There's a fair bit of rubble and random stuff lying around - twisted metal, melted stone, wood that couldn't possibly be wood... the sort of thing kids would love to play on, except there don't seem to be any kids. Anywhere.
While Radek talks to the villagers, the rest of the party mills about in the dustiness of the street. There's a fair bit of rubble and random stuff lying around - twisted metal, melted stone, wood that couldn't possibly be wood... the sort of thing kids would love to play on, except there don't seem to be any kids. Anywhere.
Line 120: Line 120:
The party returns to the car to head out, with Rhu retaking the driver's seat, and the others piling in around.
The party returns to the car to head out, with Rhu retaking the driver's seat, and the others piling in around.


There's a rough drawing of a tree with something written under it.
There's a rough drawing of a tree on the dash with something written under it.


Rhu realises he sat on something.
Rhu realises he sat on something.
Line 136: Line 136:
RADEK
RADEK
(indicating the drawing)
(indicating the drawing)
...It says "guard".
...It says 'guard'.


THE GRAVEDIGGER
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Line 142: Line 142:


RHU
RHU
Yeah, maybe it's magical? Maybe it "guards" us? Also, what's with the tree?
Yeah, maybe it's magical? Maybe it 'guards' us? Also, what's with the tree?


THE GRAVEDIGGER
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Either it's 'beware the tree" or "the tree is a guard" or the tree means nothing and it's just general blabbings.
Either it's 'beware the tree' or 'the tree is a guard' or the tree means nothing and it's just general blabbings.


RADEK
RADEK
Line 332: Line 332:


RHU
RHU
That water looks really cool and refreshing ... maybe a short swim will help us think about this problem better?
That water looks really cool and refreshing... maybe a short swim will help us think about this problem better?


Aziraphale fidgets.
Aziraphale fidgets.
Line 397: Line 397:
RADEK
RADEK
You tell me! I can't smell things!
You tell me! I can't smell things!
</screenplay>
<pre>
Aziraphale: 2
Frezak: 2


Aziraphale ignores the bones and walks back to the sinkhole.
Aziraphale ignores the bones and instead walks back to the sinkhole. They don't matter. ''(rolled 2 reality)''


Gravy follows. It looks so... nice... A way home. A way out of this. A way to just go somewhere away from the crazy...
Gravy follows. ''(rolled 2 reality)'' It looks so... nice... A way home. A way out of this. A way to just go somewhere away from the crazy...


RHU
RHU
Line 417: Line 409:


RHU
RHU
(jumping out of the car)
WAIT! COME BACK!
WAIT! COME BACK!


Aziraphale walks towards the hole while taking off the more unwieldy bits of his gear, and sits down at the edge, looking down.
Aziraphale starts taking off the more unwieldy bits of his gear as he goes, and sits down at the edge, looking down.


AZIRAPHALE
AZIRAPHALE
Line 425: Line 418:


RADEK
RADEK
(from the water's surface)
If that water made an axe disappear, I'd encourage you to think about what it'll do to you.
If that water made an axe disappear, I'd encourage you to think about what it'll do to you.


Line 436: Line 430:
Rhu mutters something under his breath.
Rhu mutters something under his breath.


For a moment, nothing happens. Then there's a horrible sucking squelching noise, and the water level suddenly starts lowering until it all drains out the bottom... leaving a dry stone base a few hundred feet down.
There are some bits of metal and wood on the ground under the rift. And a feather.


No longer supported by the water, Radek falls back to the end of the rope.


There's a horrible sucking squelching noise.
Apheori (GM): The water level suddenly starts lowering until it all drains out the bottom... leaving a dry stone base a few hundred feet down.
Radek falls back to the end of the rope.
Aziraphale is just... gone.
Aziraphale is just... gone.


Line 446: Line 441:
I warned him.
I warned him.


Wen: I did take off my gear. So you have at least a spare sword and whatever other thingies.
Rhu gasps, then quickly mumbles a prayer to Hazz'ridan.
Rhu gasps, then quickly mumbles a prayer to Hazz'ridan
 
Gaurav: Ah, that's why you did that! If you've been trasnported somewhere, you're now without protection and weapons, though.
'''''Wen''' (Aziraphale): Something about how it's not really death, I just got an express ticket to the dead end.
Apheori (GM): What sort of prayer?
 
This might be important!
Hazz'ridan blesses Rhu with his mind back, properly back, and suddenly everything becomes so much clearer. Before, it had only been mostly back. It had seemed back, but it wasn't, not really.
Wen: I'm not sure if this was where I got killed off. Up to the GM.
 
Apheori (GM) smacks Wen.
Rhu realises he's surrounded by CRAZY EVERYWHERE. His companions are losing it. Reality itself is shifting around them. And within the sinkhole, the rift in reality is actually visible now, the source of all of this, the madness, the insanity.
Wen: ow.
 
Frezak: "Make sure that he cannot go anywhere and is stuck forever without progression?"
It's a strange little rippling thing in the air, not far from where Radek is hanging.
A god of Dead Ends isn't really gonna be too useful here >.>
 
Gaurav: It's a spur-of-the-moment prayer-of-protection thing, like you might teach a kid who's scared of the monsters under his bed
Frezak: Oh, the Soldier's Prayer.
Gaurav: Rhu's just kind of panicking here
Wen: something about how it's not really death, I just got an express ticket to the dead end
If you recognise the reference, I salute you.
Apheori (GM): Nope.
Gaurav: "Worshipful-Hazz'ridan-keeper-of-ends-guide-and-protect-me-until-the-end" kind of thing
Apheori (GM): Rhu: Hazz'ridan blesses you with your mind back.
Gaurav: My mind was ... not back?
Apheori (GM): It was only mostly back.
It seemed back, but it wasn't.
Ganelon: It always seems backer than it is.
Gaurav: Gan: hahaha
Apheori (GM): Now it's really back - like how it was bfor all it this started.
Gaurav: Aph: so what is new in my mind?
Apheori (GM): You're surrounded by CRAZY EVERYWHERE.
Also the hole is actually visible now.
Gaurav: HOLY CRAP
Wen: Ah, no wonder. I completely butchered the reference. But do carry on.
Apheori (GM): It's a strange little rippling thing in the air, not far from where Radek is hanging.
That's the real hole.
That's the real hole.
The rest just sort of... happened on top of it.
The rest just sort of... happened on top of it.
Rhu blinks
 
Rhu blinks.
 
Rhu blinks again. The hole is still there.
Rhu blinks again. The hole is still there.
Rhu goes down on one knee and prays to Hazz'ridan to reveal the truth to all his companions
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You feel a warm, loving embrace of TENTACLES EVERYWHERE/
.


RHU
Rhu goes down on one knee and prays to Hazz'ridan to reveal the truth to all his companions. Suddenly he feels the warm, loving embrace of TENTACLES EVERYWHERE.
Mm, tentacular.
 
Apheori (GM): You're not really sure what to make of this.
The Gravedigger stops heading for the hole.
Gaurav: After everything that's happened in the last few days, Rhu is perfectly happy to take warmth and love where he can.
 
Apheori (GM): Anyway, Radek sees it too: a shimmering rift in space.
The seagulls start dancing.
Gaurav: Plus, clearly, something deep and religiously meaningful is going on. Rhu didn't believe in an active god who does more than work through his servants, but ... he's starting to now.
 
Radek, hanging next to the rift, suddenly sees it too, and gives it a good look-over. ''(rolled 13 arcana)''


RADEK
RADEK
Hmph.
Hmph.
Now this is more like it.


RHU
RHU
Not sure if his prayer worked, Rhu describes what he can see to his companions. He leaves out the bit about the tentacles, though.
(he points)
That's it. That's the hole. Shimmering. There.


RADEK
Rhu decidedly doesn't mention the bit about the tentacles.
Now this is more like it.
Ganelon: May I inspect this rift, magically?
Apheori (GM): Gravy would see it if he actually looked. I dunno what he's up to.
You totally can.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+10
(
3
)
+10
=
13
Nnooooo
Apheori (GM): Also the seagulls start dancing.
Frezak: I don't know what I'm up to either.
Apheori (GM): Gan: It seems to be a... rift in space!


RADEK
RADEK
Line 531: Line 493:


THE GRAVEDIGGER
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Azi might be haging around naked on the other side.
Azi might be hanging around naked on the other side.
Frezak: Did he leave his radio?


RHU
RHU
Oooh, perhaps.
Oooh, perhaps.
Apheori (GM): Yes. >.<
Frezak: Bleh.
So what now?
Rhu prays to Hazz'ridan to keep Azir safe. He's really getting into this praying lark.


RHU
Rhu prays to Hazz'ridan to keep Azir safe.
Let's maybe send a single bird through THIS rift and hope that it doesn't take Griebel out again?
 
Apheori (GM): Considering Griebel is still out...
Radek notices some of his coating is starting to seep into the rope. He quickly unties himself and drops to the bottom of the sinkhole, under the rift itself. The air there is oddly charged, as though full of static.
You could totally grab a bird and chuck it through.
 
Frezak: I tihnk a bird is probably already through.
The bits on the ground turn out to be some shredded twigs and stuff. The metal is just as shredded.
Since I don't think we've seen the missing one?
 
Ganelon: Would that be like tearing pieces of his consciousness off and throwing them into another dimension?
There's a bit of a confusion as the others have a go at first getting down a rope long enough, and then hauling Radek entirely out of the sinkhole, with, naturally, no actual help from Radek himself.
Apheori (GM): Quite possibly.
Ganelon: I mean, I'm not too clear on how swarms of animals... work.
Apheori (GM): Granny Weatherwax did it.
Sort of.
Frezak: Well in D&D swarms can't normally split off bits.
Unless it's a result of damage or something.
Apheori (GM): Everyone: Roll perception.
Rhu:
rolling d20+11 perception chek
(
7
)
+11
=
18
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+7
(
8
)
+7
=
15
Frezak:
rolling 1D20+8
(
10
)
+8
=
18
Ganelon: Er, +1 again.


RHU
Once out, Radek hands over the random bits to the Gravedigger, who looks them over. ''(rolled 21 nature)''
everybody gets +1 if they're within 5 squares of me because of "Group Awareness"
Frezak: Dammit.
19 for me then.
Apheori (GM): Gan: You notice some bits of metal and wood by the rift.
And a feather.
Gaurav: Haha
Apheori (GM): It's windy. And dry.
Some of Radek's coating is starting to seep into the rope.
Ganelon: Oh hell no.
I remove myself from the rope's proximity at once.
And if I can reach those bits safely, I'll head over to look at them.
Apheori (GM): So Radek drops to the ground by the rift. It's oddly charged near it, sort of like static.
The bits appear to be the remains of some shredded twigs and stuff.
Well, the wood, anyway. The metal is less clear.
It's mostly wood, though.
Ganelon: I'll take some back. Whatever's convenient to carry.
Apheori (GM): Some bits of wood and most of the metal, then.
Ganelon: Yeah.
Frezak: I want to examine the metal.
See if it's future-quality.
Apheori (GM): Roll a thingy.
Frezak:
rolling 1D20+8
(
13
)
+8
=
21
Apheori (GM): It seems to be, yes...
Then you realise it used to be your axe.
Rhu stays the heck away from the mysteriously draining pool and the magical whatsits, but walks up to the edge so he can better hear what the brains of the group make of it.


THE GRAVEDIGGER
THE GRAVEDIGGER
That was my axe.
This was my axe. I don't think that Azi is alive.
I don't think that Azi is alive.


RHU
RHU
If Azir is dead, we can ressurrect him from any fragment of his body, if one of those bits are fragments from his body.
If Azir is dead, we can ressurrect him from any fragment of his body, if one of those bits are fragments from his body.
If he has been teleported elsehwere or something, then no.
If he has been teleported elsehwere or something, then no.
Frezak: Do any of the bits look meaty?
 
'''''Gaurav''' (Rhu): I heard this on the Penny Arcade D&D game, so I don't know how true it is.


RADEK
RADEK
Do you see any of his parts laying around?
Do you see any of his parts laying around?
Gaurav: I heard this on the Penny Arcade D&D game, so I don't know how true it is.
 
Apheori (GM): No parts lying around.
Rhu looks around and notices that the smaller tree on the larger, dead tree is glowing. It looks like druid magic.
Except a feather.
...probably not Azir's.
Gaurav: haha
Frezak: This is no pit of acid.
Ganelon: It's true.
Frezak: Only one thing to do.
Loot Azir's stuff.
Ganelon: Yeah, I guess so.
Wen: Sword, knives, coin
Rhu looks for his religious implement -- maybe I can return it to his order, or talk to one of Hazz'ridan's priests about getting it to someone who needs it.
Wen: sarathi communicator


RHU
RHU
his -> Azir's
Oh, maybe some of those squiggles meant 'the tree that glows'. The water glowed too. Maybe it was also part of some kind of protection system?
Frezak: Load everything into the car.
In which case, is anybody nervous that we seem to be turning all the protection systems off? Shouldn't we investigate this rift? It might have something to do with Sarathi. Reality breaking down and all that. Although to be honest, this rift is much better behaved than Sarathi was.
Wen: ... not sure about other stuff. General armour headgear and crap.
Frezak: Actually.
Is there any water left?
Apheori (GM): You mean one of Carriya's priests?
Frezak: We can always trade plate armour.
That shit's expensive.
Ganelon: We most certainly can.
Frezak: especially future-forged plate.
Apheori (GM): All of the water is gone.
Well, you may have some with you.
But the sinkhole water is gone.
Frezak: I mean specifically the hole water.
Apheori (GM): Ah.
Frezak: I was gonna soak something in it and throw it trhough the portal to see if it would emerge unshredded.
On the off-chance that the water would had protected Azi.
But, eh.
Take his shit and bugger off.
Unless anyone has any ideas what to do here.
Gaurav: Good thinking.
Rhu looks up to see if the little tree is still glowing.
Ganelon: No ideas remain.
Apheori (GM): The tree looks like a tree, not really glowing now, but protected by magic. Normal magic. Druid magic.


RHU
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Huh.
What can we do with this? I've no idea.
Frezak: Protected by Greibel magic or some other druid's magic?
Apheori (GM): Some other druid. Greibel is a flock of lethargic gulls.
Frezak: oh.
Well that explains the warning.


RHU
RHU
Dancing, lethargic gulls? Or have they stopped dancing?
Poke it with a stick? See if it destroys the stick, anyhow.
Apheori (GM): The stopped dancing.
y
Frezak: How long does your language ritual last, Gan?
Gaurav: What warning? The tree with "guard" written on it?
Frezak: Yeah.
I'm guessing the tree is a meant to knock out people that try to get near the hole.
It's stopping people from getting shredded, or something.


RHU
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Strange place to put it, then. And the sign could have been clearer about which tree. We are in the middle of a forest.
Well it fucked up my axe. You try something.
Oh, maybe some of those squiggles meant "the tree that glows"
the water glowed too. Maybe it was also part of some kind of protection system?
In which case, is anybody nervous that we seem to be turning all the protection systems off?
Ganelon: A day, Frezak.
Frezak: Well we could poke around and look for a druid.
And there was that shiny crap near the mutant bird.
Rhu looks up at the sky to estimate what the time of day might be.
Apheori (GM): It's around midday.
This feels wrong, somehow.


RHU
Rhu throws stones at the rift.
The time feels wrong?
Apheori (GM): It should be later. Wasn't it around midday when you got here? You're not really sure.
Frezak: It was?
I thought it was a few minutes trip.
Apheori (GM): You dallies around a bit. It may not have been.
Dallied.
Before going.
It seems right to Gravy, then.
But Gravy ain't Rhu.
Frezak: Eh.
At this point anything that feels wrong is probably right.
Ganelon: Everything is quite wrong.
Frezak: So, what now?
Ganelon: Dunno! To the town?
Gaurav: I thought we left the inn at dawn, hung out with the villagers for 30 mins, and then took no more than an hour to get here. So midday sounds about right to me, too.


RHU
The first couple are shredded. Another bounces off. One of them just sort of disappears.
I would agree with going to town, but ... since we're here, shouldn't we investigate this rift? It might have something to do with Sarathi. Reality breaking down and all that. Although to be honest, this rift is much better behaved than Sarathi was.


THE GRAVEDIGGER
Rhu prays to Hazz'ridan for wisdom in dealing correctly with this dangerous rift.
What can we do with this?
I've no idea.


RHU
He gets a gist of a response: The rift is a dead end. This is a world of dead ends, with ends getting ever deader as time goes on. Hazz'ridan should be pleased, but he is not, for they are not his dead ends. They are something else entirely, and this is very, very bad. They need to get to the bottom of it, because the other gods seem inclined to utterly ignore it, and Rhu is the first mortal of his to have even gone near it. And survived.
Poke it with a stick? See if it destroys the stick, any how.


THE GRAVEDIGGER
Radek summons his eyebot and flies it down into the sinkhole, and then tries to send it into the rift.
Well it fucked up my axe.
You try something.
Apheori (GM): I bet Radek has even fancier ideas.
Ganelon: Distracted. One sec.


RHU
The first time, it just bounces off and tumbles to the ground. ''(rolled 1 reality)'' It still seems to be intact, however, and Radek gets it back into the air a moment later.
I'm going to throw stones at it.
Rhu throws stones at the rift.
Ganelon: As a player I actually haven't got many.
I don't have a ritual for this.
Apheori (GM): The first couple are shredded. Another bounces off. One of them just sort of disappears.
You could throw magic dust at it or something.
...I dunno.
Ganelon: Magic dust is crazy valuable.
I can't get it just anywhere.
Apheori (GM): I mean you have other things that might react differently, or specially, or something.
Ganelon: Hm.
Apheori (GM): You could totally establish a spectrum of reagents and then perform a binary search on the effects to discern a... thingy.
Thing.
Apheori (GM) babbles.
Ganelon: Hm.
Rhu prays to Hazz'ridan for wisdom in dealing correctly with this dangerous rift.
Ganelon: I will use... my daily.
Frezak: The eyebot?
Apheori (GM): Daily?


RHU
RHU
Here's what I have: an old journal (which maybe Radek can read now that our minds have been restored), a ceramic tile from the village roof, a half-digested light fixture
Oh phew. Try again?
and a string of beads left on my car seat this morning
Apheori (GM): Rhu: Dammit, why could you not have been a cleric?


RHU
The second time, it goes in without issue. ''(rolled 12 reality)''
Because we already had a leader
Ganelon: Okay.
Rhu examines the string of beads closely.
Ganelon: This is the Punishing Eye.
In combat, it is a robot that flies around and zaps enemies when you guys attack them.
I will use it as a camera.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20+7 religion check to see if the beads have any religious significance
(
3
)
+7
=
10
Ganelon: May I do this?
Gaurav: To be fair, there isn't a *whole* lot a cleric can do on paper than I can't do. Our main power is abjure undead.
Frezak: Clerics heal, Avengers smite, basically.
Gaurav: I think the DM is hinting that we should be trying the things we have. The eye might just get disintegrated like me stones.
Frezak: Flavour-wise, they're both holy guys that do shit for thier god.
Gaurav: Yes, but religiously. I have a +7 religion check; a cleric might be a bit higher, but not a _huge_ difference.
Ganelon: Well, my other option is basically to attack it with arcane magic.
Frezak: Actually, no.
The Cleric in my game has very low religion, since it's an Int skill.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: The rift is a dead end. This is a world of dead ends, with ends getting ever deader as time goes on. Hazz'ridan should be pleased, but he is not, for they are not his dead ends. They are something else entirely, and this is very, very bad. You should get to the bottom of it, because the other gods seem inclined to utterly ignore it and you're the first mortal of his to have even gone near it.
Ganelon: Yeah, but she's also kinda just winging it.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: The beads might hold such significance. You're not sure, but there is a bit of magic about them. It could be divine.
Gan: You can totally do the eye thing. What happens if it gets wrecked, though?
Frezak: But generally clerics don't have more than 12 Int.
He has infinite eyes.
He can just make another over the course of the day.
Ganelon: I can rebuild it, but tomorrow.
Apheori (GM): Excellent for him.
Okay.
Ganelon: It sees nothing after entering the rift?
Frezak: WILBUR
GO FORTH
Apheori (GM): Did you do that?
Gaurav: Ah, true.
hahaha
Apheori (GM): Roll a thing first if it even gets into the rift. >.<
Sorry.
Ganelon: A d20?
Apheori (GM): Sure, I dunno.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
1
)
=
1
Pfft.
Apheori (GM): It bounces off.
GOOD JOB.


RHU
Through the eyebot, Radek observes a horrible darkness. It is surrounded by horrible darkness, floating in horrible.
Oh phew.
Ganelon: Can I... recover it?


RHU
It flies around the horrible, encountering more horrible darkness.
Try again?
Apheori (GM): Can those things survive hitting the ground? Because if so, why not.
Frezak: There are rules for the.. resistance of Constructs.
it's tough.
It can take a couple of lasers or fireballs.
Apheori (GM): Give it another go, then.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
12
)
=
12
Apheori (GM): IT GOES IN.
Ganelon: The daily aspect of this thing assumes it's run out of power after shooting lasers at things for an entire fight.
So it's pretty sturdy but runs out of... I guess some kind of magical battery quite fast.
The entire thing is far from irreplaceable, though.
Apheori (GM): How does it see?


RHU
Woo!
Ganelon: I'd like to say, through a camera.
I mean, the game only cares about how it fights, and it operates independent of me controlling it there.
Apheori (GM): What kind of camera?
Okay, so it flies in and is sort of surrounded by horrible darkness. It's horrible, right?
It's just floating in horrible.
Ganelon: A... magical one? Lenses and all that, certainly, but it has to "think" for itself.
Apheori (GM): It flies around the horrible, encountering more horrible darkness.
Ganelon: And that part is most definitely magical.
Apheori (GM): I assume it's reporting back to you somehow?
Ganelon: Yeah.
So if that connection remains unbroken, I would experience the horrible.
Frezak: Great.
Apheori (GM): Neat.
It bounces off something.
It bounces off something.
Then there's light everywhere and it's tumbling through the light.
It's on a beach.
Sand. Sea. Palm trees.
Ganelon: Any signs of our poor paladin?
Apheori (GM): Pile of dead spikey sea creatures nearby.


RHU
Then there's light everywhere and it's tumbling through the light. It's flying over a beach now. Sand. Sea. Palm trees.
Any ... giant fish?
 
Apheori (GM): Tracks belonging to... well, you have no idea, but they ain't his.
A pile of dead spikey sea creatures nearby.
No giant fish..
 
No sign of the paladin.
 
Tracks in the sand, belonging to some alien creature.


RADEK
RADEK
Fascinating. Also, horrible.
Fascinating. Also, horrible.
But it does seem that some manner of stable environment exists on the other side of this rift.
But it does seem that some manner of stable environment exists on the other side of this rift. It's in no better shape.
Apheori (GM): Also the palm trees are dead.
 
Like they were just dried out suddenly.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
So it wasn't immediately apparent.
Not much use unless you have idea how to get trhough safely. Since being shredded is still possible.
And I don't want to be shredded.
 
Getting closer, it seems the palm trees are dead, like they were just dried out suddenly. And the rift on this side is enormous. It stretches across the beach, into the waves, which just sort of slice around it, and up the sky and overhead.


RADEK
RADEK
It's in no better shape.
...Oh my. We're looking at a much larger hole on the other side.


THE GRAVEDIGGER
The light over the beach is darker than it should be, and getting darker, shifting to purple...
Not much use unless you have idea how to get trhough safely.
Since being shredded is still possible.
Apheori (GM): The rift on this side is enormous.


THE GRAVEDIGGER
Around the eyebot, reality folds in on itself.
And I don't want to be shredded.


RADEK
Everything goes dark, but the connection remains. The eyebot is still there. Somewhere.
...Oh my.
We're looking at a much larger hole on the other side.
Apheori (GM): It stretches across the beach, into the waves, which just sort of slice around it, and up the sky and overhead.
The light is darker than it should be , and getting darker, shifting to purple...
Reality folds in on itself.
Ganelon: ...Communications cut?
Gaurav: Reality on that side or this side?
Ganelon: I should sincerely hope that one.
Apheori (GM): That side.
And, well, everything is dark. But you think it's still there. Somewhere.
Gaurav: Phew.


RADEK
RADEK
We... are going to want to close this.
We... are going to want to close this. And I'm going to need a new robot.
And I'm going to need a new robot.
(To Rhu): You definitely want to close this. You god has very nearly commanded it. Or as close as he ever gets to commanding anything.
Apheori (GM): The darkness this time is different from the previous one.
It appears to just be a dark... room?
Gaurav: Hazz'ridan would see a dead end here where the roads cut across space and time. We must close this.
Ganelon: Hm.
Gaurav: Er, that was supposed to be Rhu, sorry.
Ganelon: I'll have it shoot the laser. That ought to produce light.


RHU
RHU
He wills it.
Hazz'ridan would see a dead end here where the roads cut across space and time. We must close this. He wills it.
Apheori (GM): The laser reveals it to be a large cave, full of stalagtagamiteses.
 
...you know what I mean.
This new darkness seems to be different from the previous one. The eyebot's sensors indicate it to just be some sort of dark room.
Ganelon: I do.
 
Radek has the eyebot shoot its laser, illuminating what turns out to be a large cavern, full of stalagtagamiteses. There's no visible rift here, but the space around seems to ripple in shimmer in the light before it goes out.


RADEK
RADEK
First a beach, now a cave...
First a beach, now a cave...
Apheori (GM): There's no visible rift here, but the space around seems to ripple in shimmer in the light before it goes out.
 
Ganelon: Well, it can't exactly power the weapon for long enough to really get anywhere as a source of light.
Radek flies the eyebot about through the cavern, mapping out a portion. As it moves, it encounters pockets of more and less resistance; The air is funny, but also the space is funny.
Apheori (GM): Does it move?
 
Ganelon: I suppose, while it's still active.
Apheori (GM): As it moves it encounters pockets of more and less resistance. The air is funny, but also the space is funny.
Then it passes through a thinner patch and it's somewhere else once again.
Then it passes through a thinner patch and it's somewhere else once again.
This looks like Sarathi. Same style of architecture, same sort of technology, at least. It's in a building, in an open area full of tables and rubble and sunlight.
 
Some overgrown plants reach toward the openings in the walls and ceiling.
This looks like Sarathi. Same style of architecture, same sort of technology, at least. It's in a building, in an open area full of tables and rubble and sunlight. Some overgrown plants reach toward the openings in the walls and ceiling.
 
The connection, however, is getting tenuous at best, as though it has been getting further and further away with each passage...
The connection, however, is getting tenuous at best, as though it has been getting further and further away with each passage...
Ganelon: Let's see if it can get outside and take a look at the sky.
 
Before we lose it.
Radek flies the eyebot toward one of the cracks in the building wall, revealing a vista that very definitely is Sarathi. This city, however, it utterly demolished. Few buildings remain past their foundations, as though they had collapsed after a a great battle.
Apheori (GM): It heads out one of the holes in the wall, revealing a vista that very definitely is Sarathi. This city, however, it utterly demolished. Few buildings remain past their foundations, as though they had collapsed after a a great battle.
 
The sky, however, is ordinary enough. A bit of a smoky haze lies around the horizons. Billowy clouds drift overhead.
The sky, however, is ordinary enough. A bit of a smoky haze lies around the horizons. Billowy clouds drift overhead. Three moons are also visible, though the Sarathi they'd gone to had only had two.
Three moons are also visible.
 
But didn't Sarathi only have two moons?
Then the connection goes out entirely.
Ganelon: Interesting.
Well, there's certainly nowhere for the thing to go.
Gaurav: Look for more holes? It looks like there's a place -- the beach -- where all the holes intersect, and there's a little hole here and a big one (or many little ones?) on Sarathi but maybe the beach world is where we'll have to go to shut this whole thing down.
Ganelon: If there's even anything left of it by the time we get there.
Frezak: I'm not going into any of those unless I'm sure i'm not going to end up as Purina Gravy.
Gaurav: We could close up this hole and then go look for Sarathi again, see if we can figure out how to close the hole situation there. It's a band-aid solution, but fixing all of space and time seems a bit beyond a bunch of level 1 adventurers anyway.
Ganelon: Well, we
Apheori (GM): Oh, that reminds me. You should all level up.
Ganelon: We've gotta KILL THINGS to level, usually
Although solving mysteries is another way.
Frezak: The chickens were already dead.
Apheori (GM): Gan: You lose the connection entirely. The thing is gone.


RADEK
RADEK
Blast.
Blast.
Well, it reached Sarathi, and the sky was much more agreeable this time.
Well, it reached Sarathi, and the sky was much more agreeable this time. The place is utterly destroyed. Although, I wouldn't assume that it discovered the planet at the same 'present' we are enjoying right now.
The place is utterly destroyed. Although, I wouldn't assume that it discovered the planet at the same "present" we are enjoying right now.


RHU
RHU
Line 947: Line 620:


RADEK
RADEK
I don't think there *is* a city to find here.
I don't think there ''is'' a city to find here. We should count ourselves lucky if this planet is simply underdeveloped, and not in the past itself.
We should count ourselves lucky if this planet is simply underdeveloped, and not in the past itself.


THE GRAVEDIGGER
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Line 955: Line 627:
RHU
RHU
Oh, right. The past.
Oh, right. The past.
Apheori (GM): There's a bit of a gurgling bubbling noise.
Rhu looks around for the source of the noise
Apheori (GM): Water has started seeping back into the hole.
Ganelon: Huh.
I'll gladly take a sample of that.


RHU
There's a bit of a gurgling bubbling noise from the bottom of the sinkhole, and muddy water begins to seep back into it.
From where?
 
Ganelon: I assume from below.
Radek uses the ropes to take a sample of the water.
Apheori (GM): Yeah, you're like in the bottom of this deep hole basin thing.
It's seeping back out of the bottom.
Not very quickly, though.
But enough to be gurgly.
Frezak: Is the water... weird at all?
Glowing?
Smell funny?
Apheori (GM): It's muddy. Looks normal.
Smells a bit like sulfur.
Sulphur in english?
Oh, whatever.
Frezak: Did it smell like that before?
Apheori (GM): Not really.
Frezak: Hmm.
Ganelon: Either form is acceptable.
I'll still take some just to be sure.
Gaurav: We don't know: Radek was the only one close enough to smell it, and he doesn't smell.
Frezak: So we've learnt that the hole goes somewhere else.
That there are holes of different sizes. Possibly interconnected.


RHU
RHU
Line 988: Line 636:


THE GRAVEDIGGER
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Well maybe he could tell us how.
Well maybe he could tell us how. Else he can go bury himself.
Else he can go bury himself.


RHU
RHU
I'll ask him.
I'll ask him.
Rhu prays to Hazz'ridan, maker of ends, for wisdom in the ways of closing rifts in space and time.
Rhu prays to Hazz'ridan, maker of ends, for wisdom in the ways of closing rifts in space and time.
Apheori (GM): Hazz'ridan says he has no fucking idea and frankly this is the first time anyone has even gotten this far with the whole mess.
 
HAZZ'RIDAN
(such that only Rhu can hear him)
''I do not know. This is the first time anyone has ever gotten so far at all. Find out.''


RADEK
RADEK
I couldn't care less what your god would like us to do, but in the interests of my own survival, I'm closing this hole.
I couldn't care less what your god would like us to do, but in the interests of my own survival, I'm closing this hole.
Gaurav: Do I hear his hallowed voice in my head, or does everybody hear it bellow across the land?
Apheori (GM): In your head.
Hazz'ridan also says you should try to find out.


RHU
RHU
Hazz'ridan is alas unable to help us, but encourages us to find a way. He says nobody else has ever gotten this far to sorting this mess out so I guess we're ahead of the crowd there.
Hazz'ridan is alas unable to help us, but encourages us to find a way. He says nobody else has ever gotten this far to sorting this mess out so I guess we're ahead of the crowd there.
Apheori (GM): And then maybe if you could be so good as to beat Kyrule over the head with it, everything can go back to fine and normal with good and proper dead ends like there are supposed to be.
 
HAZZ'RIDAN
(such that only Rhu can hear him)
''And then maybe if you could be so good as to beat Kyrule over the head with it, everything can go back to fine and normal with good and proper dead ends like there are supposed to be.''
 
RHU
(muttering)
Amen.


THE GRAVEDIGGER
THE GRAVEDIGGER
So your god is as clueless as us.
So your god is as clueless as us. WHoop-dee-doo.
WHoop-dee-doo.
Rhu mutters "Amen." to Hazz'ridan under his breath.


RADEK
RADEK
So we need to do all the work ourselves. Nothing new there.
So we need to do all the work ourselves. Nothing new there.
Apheori (GM): Where'd everyone go?
Ganelon: I didn't go anywhere.
Apheori (GM): It says you did. o_O
Ghuh. Is Gaurav still here too?
Okay.
Gaurav: Yup!
Apheori (GM): Okay.


RHU
HAZZ'RIDAN
But seriously, get to the bottom of it, he says. It spans worlds, universes, that were never meant to be connected. You have been pulled from your own and that you wound up here is a greater blessing than you could have imagined. You are not alone here, and this shall not be your dead end.
(such that only Rhu can hear him)
HE'S HELPED YOU NOW.
''Get to the bottom of this. It spans worlds, universes, that were never meant to be connected. You have been pulled from your own, and that you wound up here is a greater blessing than you could have imagined. You are not alone here, and this shall not be your dead end.''
Apheori (GM) glares at the app thingy.
 
Rhu repeats this to the group. They basically ignore him.


THE GRAVEDIGGER
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Well do you have any idea HOW to close it, Radek?
Well do you have any idea '''how''' to close it, Radek?
Rhu repeats this to the group


RADEK
RADEK
None. Dealing in spatial instabilities is a hobby of mine at best.
None. Dealing in spatial instabilities is a hobby of mine at best.
Apheori (GM): Also you
're standing in a layer of water now.
Maybe ankle deep.
Rhu walks out of the hole
Apheori (GM): You need to get into the car.
Rhu gets into the car.


RHU
RHU
Amadi seemed to know a thing or two. I wonder if we could get her back somehow. Maybe if we could figure out where Midnight was.
Amadi seemed to know a thing or two. I wonder if we could get her back somehow. Maybe if we could figure out where Midnight was. Or when.
Or when.
Rhu gets into the driving seat.
Frezak: I'll get back into the car too.
Ganelon: Ditto.
Apheori (GM): The seagulls are asleep, wrapped in porridge.


RADEK
RADEK
Well, she didn't show up while I was working.
Well, she didn't show up while I was working.
Apheori (GM): According to the mechanics, what happens to Greibel's stuff when he's seagulls?


RHU
In the sinkhole, the water level is still rising, but as it approaches the level of the rift, the rift seems to be trying to twist away from the surface. Like it doesn't like it.
Aw. Porridge gulls.
Ganelon: It becomes a part of his form.
Apheori (GM): Ah.
Ganelon: Armor still protects him but not shields. It's... weird.
Apheori (GM): Huh.
Frezak: he drops handheld items that are not Implements.
So anything that's not a staff or Totem for him.
Ganelon: I can see why they did it, because otherwise you'd have no end of trouble picking up all your junk every single fight, but still.
Apheori (GM): So potentially there's a bong and crap under the pile of porridge-wrapped gulls?
Or is a bong an implement?
Gaurav: It should be for him, I think :)
Frezak: He probably does have Bong Proficiency.
Ganelon: Yeah. Bong Expertise even, I dare say.
But maybe not Bong Focus
Apheori (GM): Okay, then.
Everyone roll perception.
Frezak:
rolling 1D20+8
(
11
)
+8
=
19
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+7+1
(
15
)
+7+1
=
23
Frezak: DAMMIT ANother +1 >.>
Apheori (GM): For some reason the rift seems to be trying to twist away from the water. Like it doesn't like it.
Gaurav:
rolling d20+11 perception check
(
8
)
+11
=
19
Apheori (GM): You guys noticed this.
GOOD JOB.
Ganelon: I have some of this water, yeah?
Frezak: Feels great to have a perception skill for once.
Apheori (GM): Yes you do.
Ganelon: Alright. I'm not throwing it away or anything.
Just making sure.
Frezak: Soak a gull in water and throw it in.


RHU
RHU
Huh. Is the rift low enough that it would have been under water when we got here?
So the rift was covered in water it dislikes and with a tree overhead to 'guard' it or something. But it didn't work, because this planet has had a bad time of it. So maybe us uncovering it made it worse? Maybe together they can't be destroyed but once the rift is unprotected it can be? So many questions.
Apheori (GM): It was definitely under water when you got here.
It's near the bottom of the hole.
Frezak: Do you do that?
Frezak: Not if peeps tell me not to.
 
RHU
If we just stand back and do nothing, the water is going to cover it in a bit anyway.
And we don't have to sacrifice part of Greibel's soul
Frezak: SO how do we close it?
I'll fill a bottle with this water and fling it into the portal.
 
RHU
So: the rift was covered in water it dislikes and with a tree overhead to "guard" it or something. But it didn't work, because this planet has had a bad time of it. So: maybe us uncovering it made it worse? Maybe together they can't be destroyed but once the rift is unprotected it can be? So many questions.
We could go back to the village and try to find someone who understands this better than us.
We could go back to the village and try to find someone who understands this better than us.


RADEK
RADEK
It's as good a place to start as any.
It's as good a place to start as any.
Apheori (GM): The bottle bounces off and lands in the rest of the water.
Frezak: Hmm.
I'll get the bottle back.
Grab one of the bits of wood. Get that nice and wet.
And toss THAT in.
Gaurav: The DM also suggested earlier that we might already have something that affects the rift in some way. Should we try those before we leave?
Apheori (GM): It goes in.
Frezak: Dammit;
I forgot that sometimes things go in and sometimes they don't, regardles off what they are.
Ganelon: Things I have:


RHU
They all pile back into the car.
Maybe they go in if they're wetted with this watery thing?
 
- A half digested light fixture (see "Rhu pockets the light fixture." in log)
The Gravedigger grabs a piece of wood and tosses it at the rift. It bounces off.
- An old journal from the better reality
 
- A ceramic shingle from the Communist village
The Gravedigger grabs another piece of wood, dunks it in Radek's water sample, and then tosses it at the rift as well. It goes in.
- A string of beads left for us on the driving seat of the car
Hey, Radek, do you want to try reading the journal again, now that Hazz'ridan has cleared our minds and allowed us to see the rift?
Apheori (GM): Snrk.
Ganelon: - Bombs
- Vials of Alchemist's Fire
- Magic Dust
- Bodily Fluids of a Small Dragon
Frezak: I have... Booze?
Names, is my Booze Shalott or just booze?
Ganelon: I consider all of those things valuable, so I don't want to just go tossing them into a hole-of-no-return all willy-nilly.
Apheori (GM): The water continues to rise, and as someone predicted, finally hits the rift regardless of its vague attempts to avoid it.
The rippling effect spreads through the water, filling it with odd shards of wrongness, as though the water itself took on the properties of the rift.
Ganelon: And I guess I'll take a look at the journal, but I predict zero odds of success.
Ooh, interesting. I want some of that too.
Apheori (GM): Frezak: Your booze is magic potions you haven't identifies.
And there's the shalott that went bad, but I dunno who had that.
Ganelon: I told someone to take the bottle.
Apheori (GM): You set aside the journal and get a sample of the weird water, though as it's detached from the rest it goes back to looking the same as ever. This may or may not mean anything.
Ganelon: It means the world to me.
As in "the world is doomed, oh gods".


RHU
'''''Frezak''' (Gravy): Dammit. I forgot that sometimes things go in and sometimes they don't, regardles off what they are.
This world seems to be doing okay for now. But whether that's because of the water or inspite of the water remains to be seen.


THE GRAVEDIGGER
The water continues to rise and finally hits the rift regardless of its vague attempts to avoid it. The rippling effect spreads through the water, filling it with odd shards of wrongness, as though the water itself took on the properties of the rift.
We'd need to check out another hole.


RHU
Radek, clearly interested in this change, takes another water sample, though as it's detached from the rest it goes back to looking the same as ever.
Ooooh. I like this plan.
The other idea I had was that we could bust up that glowing tree up there and see if anybody comes to fix it.
Apheori (GM): At some point in all of this Rhu flew y'all out of the hole.
I need you all to roll d20s.


RADEK
As the rift is covered entirely, they feel it calling to them again, the same pull of the hole as they'd felt earlier, getting stronger the more it fills. This time it isn't overpowering, however, and isn't compelling anyone to actually do anything.
What is the tree doing?
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
3
)
=
3


RHU
uh oh
rolling d20
(
7
)
=
7
Ganelon: I'm really not doing great with these.
Gaurav: Gan: you just flew a robot through a rift into probably two separate alternate universes and tied us back into our starting storyline. I think you're allowed a couple of lousy rolls.
The Gravedigger:
rolling 1D20
(
6
)
=
6
Ganelon: Good point.
I love that little robot.
Apheori (GM): Okay, so y'all feel the hole calling to you again, and getting stronger the more it fills.
The water is full of shimmers.
The water is full of shimmers.
But it's not overpowering, and not compelling you to actually do anything.
You just feel it and recognise it.


RHU
RHU
We should maybe get out of here.
We should maybe get out of here. Before it gets any stronger.
Apheori (GM): Although I must say, this could have been really, really bad.
 
RHU
Before it gets any stronger.


RADEK
RADEK
Please do.
Please do.
Gaurav: What could?
Apheori (GM): THIS.
Apheori (GM) cackles.
Rhu takes us 20ft into the air and drives us in the direction of the village.
Gaurav: This roll? This tree? This rift?
This the car?
Apheori (GM): The situation.
Nevermind.
You see that weird bird with its sparkly things again.
Frezak: Shoot the bird.
Ganelon: I totally could, but why?
Frezak: So we can take it's stuff.
Might be money or gear.
Apheori (GM): Also it's mutated.
And like really big.
Frezak: AND I WANT TO KILL THINGS.
How big?
Apheori (GM): Uh...
Gaurav: We have gone awfully long time without attacking anything :-/
Apheori (GM): Maybe a few meters.
Gaurav: ...
I'm sure we could go back to the village and hunt like wild boar or something
Apheori (GM): Actually I don't know.
Frezak: I'm pretty sure that was not mentioned the first time we saw it.
Apheori (GM): I can't remember.
Frezak: I'm pretty sure I would not suggest attacking a bird that's bigger than I am.
Gaurav: The log says: "It's very large, missing a bunch of feathers, and has too many limbs."
Apheori (GM): Okay, it's probably not that big, but it does... look big.
Frezak: FINE.
We'll leave it alone >.>
Apheori (GM): You're no fun.
Gaurav: Is it near its nest? I think we saw its nest last time?
Apheori (GM): It's sitting on a pile of shiny things.
...yes.


RHU
Without further ado, they turn the car toward the village and head back.
Hmm. Last time, we suggested that Griebel turn into a flock of birds and distract it while we value it's nest. We could try that again.
 
Gaurav: I believe Frezak's exact words were "A flock of sexy mutant birds", so there's that.
 
Ganelon: Hm...
EXT. Car over open wilderness - afternoon
Apheori (GM): Unfortunately Greibel still seems to be out of it.
 
Ganelon: Yeah, it'd be nice if BSG were actually here.
They fly around a bit, checking out the area. A big dry river over there. Some mountains in the distance which look like they might have some real life on them. A whole lot of desert in the other direction.
Apheori (GM): Yes.
Instead you have a pile of gently swaying seagulls in the back seat.
Gaurav: o.0
Apheori (GM): And no use for them.
Frezak: Would be nice to have an Azi >.>
TO kill things.
So... Back to the willage, then.
Unless we want to just recon the area.
Gaurav: Yeah, why not.
Ganelon: To what, returning or recon?
I will shoot this bird if that's what you guys want.
Gaurav: Reconning. We have a car. At the village we're just going to tell tall tales of our adventures and get some sleep.
Frezak: I don't think firing at a meter or two long bird is a good idea.
Sleep?
It's just afternoon, no?
Apheori (GM): Right.
Gaurav: We could just drive around and see if we spot anything. I assume that we've now driven around this area enough that we're unlikely to get lost.
Frezak: Getting lost from the air is tough.
Gaurav: Also true.
Frezak: Yeah, let's just get an idea of what's where and see if we can spot any landmarks or stuff that might be interesting.
Gaurav: Let's do it.
Ganelon: Okay.
Apheori (GM): YOU RECONOTATIFICISE!
Rhu drives the car around the big tree in wide circles a couple of times, looking for anything interesting on the ground.
Rhu:
rolling d20+11 perception check
(
11
)
+11
=
22
Apheori (GM): There's a big dry river over there. Some mountains in the distance which look like they might have some real life on them.
There's a whole lot of desert in the other direction.
It's just dead and desolate and horrible and oh, look, dee-like things.
deer
Ganelon: Does it count as poaching if those laws were invented in the future?


RHU
Some deer-like things further off.
are the deers several meters across? If not, we could hunt them.
Apheori (GM): You also see a lot of windmills around the village you'd been at before. Apparently they hadn't had the sails up at the time.
They look like... deer-like things.
Frezak: yeah, we can just drive and have Radek shoot 'em.
Apheori (GM): Deer-sized, at least.


RHU
A general agreement to maybe hunt the things is established, and they head in that direction.
It's only poaching if somebody already owns them. And it's only "getting caught for poaching" if you can't shoot your way out.
Frezak: We can kill it.
I'd have a good chance of telling whether it's edible.
Ganelon: This would probably be fun if Radek weren't such a grump.
Air-car hunting.
Frezak: And /I/ know how to prepare food that doesn't come out of a tube/box/machine.
I'll make the yee-haw shouts as needed.
I need a hat.
Apheori (GM): You could put the journal on your head.


RHU
When they get in range, Radek takes aim with his rifle.
NO! Who knows what deep secrets this journal may hide? We must treat it with respect.
Ganelon: I TAKE AIM


RADEK
RADEK
Intact body, right?
Intact body, right?
Apheori (GM): This is your friendly nagging voice reminding you that my commendary is not necessarily worth commenting on. Also you might want to actually check those secrets at some point.
ROLL AN ATTACK THINGY.


THE GRAVEDIGGER
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Yeah.
Yeah. You can pop the head or bleed it out, though.
You can pop the head or bleed it out, though.
 
Frezak: What DOES your gun fire?
Radek fires and misses. ''(rolled 12 vs AC)''
Ganelon: I'll read the journal when I can recast this language ritual.
 
Frezak: Was it bullets or laser?
They get a little closer, and the Gravedigger throws a grappling hook and rope at a running deerthing below them. It tangles around the deerthing's legs, and the deerthing is pulled into the air below them. ''(rolled 20 vs AC)''
Ganelon: I said as much when we first tried to read it.
It was bullets, because they're modular.
Ie: acid bullets, which I will not use on a deer.
Frezak: Brill.
Apheori (GM): Roll or something.
Ganelon: [Weapon Attack - Rifle]
rolling 1d20+3+5+0
(
4
)
+3+5+0
=
12
BAH
HUMBUG
Apheori (GM): You missed.
Ganelon: RELOAD.
Frezak: I need spare axes.
Ganelon: I need loaded dice.
Frezak: I have a grappling hook and rope.
Can i throw that?
Because that's the perfect flying car hunting weapon.
Apheori (GM): You totally can. XD
Frezak: HERE GOES
rolling 1D20+4
(
16
)
+4
=
20
Ka-chung.
Hello, lunch.


RADEK
RADEK
Line 1,364: Line 743:


THE GRAVEDIGGER
THE GRAVEDIGGER
YEEEE-HAAAWWWW
YEEEE-HAAAWWWW.
Pull up!
 
Rhu does so, and the deerthing swings about chaotically below them, making funny noises.
 
The Gravedigger hauls the thing up a bit and then unexpectedly winds up with a pile of thrashing deerthing in his lap when one of the swings takes it over the side of the car.
 
The Gravedigger headbutts it to death.


RHU
'''''Frezak''' (Gravy): Those guys probably think that headbutting how hunters used to do it in the olden days. "It's an ancient, accredited technique. Shut up."
:D
Apheori (GM): You wind up with a kicking, screaming dear on your lap.
Frezak: Oh no.
It's hanging from the car.


THE GRAVEDIGGER
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Pull up!
Now, a spot to gut and clean this. Any rivers?
Rhu pulls up
 
Apheori (GM): Oh, where's the fun in that?
They fly on, but all the rivers nearby seem to be dry. So they follow pick one and follow the riverbed for a time. It passes through plains and desert, the land randomly switching between the two.
Lap is where you want it.
 
Frezak: I'll headbutt it to death then.
Later, they come to something of a canyon, dry but deep. Then the river passes underground for a time, and they fly over a ridge, and further down is more canyon. Here, there is some water in it. A trickle.
Apheori (GM): Like what happens when you hit one on the road and it comes in the windshield...
 
Snrk.
Later still, the river gets bigger, mountains sort of rise around it, it goes through some hills, snakes around some much greener area, and gets a whole lot larger very, very suddenly, with tributaries and everything.
Okay, so Rhu pulls it up and Gravy headbutts it todeath.
 
Yeah, I can see this.
It seems to head over mountains in the distance, and beyond, perhaps to the coast, but for now they head down to park.
Frezak: THose guys probably think that headbutting how hunters used to do it in the olden days :p
 
"It's an ancient, accredited technique. Shut up."
 
Apheori (GM): Yeah. So that happens.
EXT. Deslan riverside - evening
Ganelon: We have a dead deer-like.
 
Apheori (GM): So you're in the car, sailing over the prairie, deer in your lap after headbutting it to death.
The party gets out by the river and sets up to roast the deer. The Gravedigger carries a tree over to the camp before setting down to clean the carcass while Rhu builds up a fire. Radek goes through his things and does some miscellaneous science in the meantime.
And a pile of seagulls in the back seat.
 
Greibel is still seagulls and sitting in the car like a flock of disoriented, bemused seagulls somehow attached to a car.
 
Once everything is cleaned up and the fire good and low, the Gravedigger starts off by roasting some legs and passes hunks of the result around while the rest burns down for the villagers.
 
'''''Ganelon''' (Radek): I don't suppose I could just consume its soul, huh? But, you know, not to be evil or anything. It's just easier to eat that way.
 
'''''Ganelon''' (Radek): Waste no part of the animal and all, y'know. Yeah, you've got the meat, bones, organs, and blood, but what about the life? That's where the old man comes in.
 
'''''Gaurav''' (Rhu): What would happen if you ate the soul of a creature without killing the body?
 
'''''Frezak''' (Gravy): In D&D? You just get a... mindless person. An awake but not concious body.
 
'''''Ganelon''' (Radek): I guess it couldn't really feed itself, though.
 
'''''Frezak''' (Gravy): Nope. It'd just stand there. Or sit. Or whatever position it was in when you sucked the soul out.


THE GRAVEDIGGER
Radek takes his hunk and efficiently sucks out everything strictly beneficial about it and injects himself with that, leaving an awful, flavorless slab of dry meat behind.
Now, a spot to gut and clean this.
Any rivers?
Apheori (GM): They all seem to be dry.
Gaurav: Somebody needs to make a postcard with that image. "Greetings from that place we went to after Sarathi!"
Ganelon: I can just imagine Radek looking really grumpy with his rifle over his shoulder.
And deer blood all over Gravy's grinning face.
Apheori (GM): Snrk.
Frezak: Gravy's enjoying himself now.
No rivers?
Well, crud.
Gaurav: We do know a pool with water-like stuff in it. Probably best to take it back to the village, though. They'll have water. Somewhere.
Frezak: Sure.
Gaurav: Unless you want to keep reconning
I guess there's enough place to put a deer in the car?
Frezak: We tie it to the front, of course.
Ganelon: Well, we're missing one paladin worth of space.
Gaurav: hah. this is true. someone give that deer a pair of dark glasses and lets keep exploring. I'd like to follow one of those dry river beds for a bit and see if we can find some outlet.
Frezak: We could have it trail on a rope and tie one of the laser-proof capes to it.
Ganelon: Works for me.
Frezak: Yeah, find out where the water is.
Apheori (GM): Which way do you head?
Rhu drives the car to the closest dry river bed, then follow it downhill.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
You follow the riverbed through the plains and desert.
It sort of randomly switches between the two.
Then it gets like a canyon. Still dry, but deeper. Then it goes underground - you fly over a ridge and crap and find more canyon further down.
There some water in it.
A wee little trickle.
Apheori (GM): Keep following?


RHU
'''''Ganelon''' (Radek): It's how I'd eat if I were able.
Oooh!
Yes. I think we'll follow the river for maybe two hours? See where we get to? That should give us enough time to get back.
Frezak: Sure.
We're in no rush, are we?
Maybe flyby the hole when we head back, in case Azi reappeared.
Else, yeah, just keep following this.
Ganelon: We still have plenty of time before I can no longer speak to those villagers.
We'd have to have stayed up throughout the entire night for that.
Rhu drives us on for two hours since we started following the river.
Apheori (GM): The river gets bigger, mountains sort of rise around it, it goes through some hills, snakes around some much greener area, and gets a whole lot larger very suddenly.


RHU
'''''Frezak''' (Gravy): It probably looks... icky. Grey. Dry. DEAD. It's the corpse of food.
Pretty! No water, though?
Apheori (GM): There's definitely water. There's a big old river, with tributaries and everything!
You haven't reached where it dumps, though, no.
Frezak: Maybe stop for a bit now to make dinner?
Or lunch or whatever.
Apheori (GM): FOOOD.
Frezak: In-game.
Apheori (GM): Okay. You want to roast your deer?


RHU
The Gravedigger eats a leg of deerthing.
Might be a better idea to bring the deer back to the villagers. On the other hand, they might not like us hunting their deer.
Frezak: Yeah, cut it up, wash it, get rid of the offall...
Apheori (GM): It's totally around dinner time by now.
Frezak: have some legs.
Bring the rest back to the willage.
Ganelon: I don't suppose I could just consume its soul, huh?


RHU
Rhu mimics the Gravedigger and tries to eat a leg of deerthing as well, but only gets through part of it.
Oh yeah, that works.
Ganelon: But, you know, not to be evil or anything.
It's just easier to eat that way.


RHU
They wind up throwing bits of the rest of it at the Greibel seagulls, which, though they're not acting all that intelligent at the moment, do seem to be aware enough to eat at the bits.
Less messy, too.
Ganelon: Waste no part of the animal and all, y'know.
Yeah, you've got the meat, bones, organs, and blood, but what about the life?
That's where the old man comes in.
Apheori (GM): Do you really consume souls of things?
Ganelon: No, probably not.
Apheori (GM): Aww.
Gaurav: Wouldn't the soul have left the body when the deer died?
Apheori (GM): Did you remember to cast soul trap first?
Ganelon: It would require a spiritual view on life rather than a scientific one for Radek to think of extracting the... "being" of an animal and sustain himself with it.
Apheori (GM): Ah, heh.
Indeed.
Well, you don't need me to roast deer, so I'ma grab some food too.
Ganelon: More likely he'd just extract nutrients and discard the useless flesh afterwards.
Gaurav: What would happen if you ate the soul of a creature without killing the body? The mind boggles.
Chewy.
Ganelon: I dunno.
Frezak: In D&D?
Ganelon: I mean, death of the body.
Frezak: You just get a... mindless person.
An awake but not concious body.
Ganelon: Oh?
Frezak: Yarr.
Ganelon: I guess it couldn't really feed itself, though.
Frezak: Nope.
Gaurav: Creepy.
Frezak: It'd just stand there.
Or sit.
Or whatever position it was in when you sucked the soul out.
Ganelon: Well, anyway, that's what Radek does with his share of the kill.
He efficiently sucks out everything strictly beneficial about it and injects himself with that, leaving an awful, flavorless slab of dry meat behind.
Frezak: Ew.
Ganelon: It's how I'd eat if I were able.
Apheori (GM): XD
That slab of meat would make for a good practical joke, I imagine.
Frezak: It probably looks... icky.
Grey.
Dry.
DEAD.
Ganelon: "This... this is literally just matter."
Frezak: It's the corpse of food.
Ganelon: "How did you even manage to make a flank of meat so unappetizing?"
Gaurav: Food corpse!
Ganelon: "I'd be impressed if I weren't so underwhelmed by the taste. Even the texture is just... awful."
Apheori (GM): And the rest of you? What do you all do?
Frezak: I eat a leg of deerthing.
Gaurav: Are we going to cook it first?
Frezak: Sure.
I thought we did.
Gaurav: Then I too eat a leg of deerthing.
Apheori (GM): It was unclear. Now it is clear.
Ganelon: I guess we could feed the gulls, too.
Frezak: With meat giblets?
Ganelon: Are they even carnivores? Whatever, I'm sure Greibel can deal with it.
Gaurav: Gulls are omnivores I think.
Frezak: They are.
Ganelon: Then yeah. We could even make a game out of it, assuming they were responsive enough to eat at all.
Apheori (GM): They seem to be. They're just not acting at all... intelligent.
Frezak: Yah, just throw them meatbits.
Throw 'em deer thing bits and let's get exploratoring.


RADEK
RADEK
Do you suppose his core intelligence was destroyed and we're simply feeding the instinct-driven remains of his "body"?
Do you suppose his core intelligence was destroyed and we're simply feeding the instinct-driven remains of his 'body'?
The porridge: Or he could just be really stoned.
 
Frezak: DAMN
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Or he could just be really stoned.


RHU
RHU
I'm sure he'll be back. Once he remembers how.
I'm sure he'll be back. Once he remembers how.
Frezak: SORRY
MISCLICKED
RADEK
I've never paid much mind to druids.
Frezak: That was Gravy >.>
Gaurav: That could have been the very best interjection of all time :)
Rhu continues driving us along the river until our two hours is up, then turns the car around and drives us back to the village.


RADEK
RADEK
They're always going on about nature, like it holds secrets we haven't exhausted millennia ago.
I've never paid much mind to druids. They're always going on about nature, like it holds secrets we haven't exhausted millennia ago.
A worthless profession, druidism.
A worthless profession, druidism.
Ganelon: Apologies to any druids in the audience who may be offended by my fictional character's opinions.


THE GRAVEDIGGER
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Line 1,543: Line 816:
RADEK
RADEK
For this one?
For this one?
Apheori (GM): Wait! Wait!


RHU
RHU
I don't know about that, Radek. A druid set up the little tree at the rift, and possibly also the waterlike thing. Maybe once we convince Greibel to unbirdify, we could get his opinion on the magic underlying them.
I don't know about that, Radek. A druid set up the little tree at the rift, and possibly also the waterlike thing. Maybe once we convince Greibel to unbirdify, we could get his opinion on the magic underlying them.
Apheori (GM): If you keep going down the river, you find something. Do you keep going down the river after eating, or turn back?
 
It's getting dark again.
While they're at this, the sun sets.


RHU
RHU
Let's get back before it gets too dark.
Let's get back before it gets too dark.
Frezak: If it's getting dark, we'll probably start heading back.
Ganelon: Yeah, unless this is some very important clue.
Even then, we could easily justify heading back to the one place with water again later.


RHU
They pack up and head back.
Yes. And possibly with a human Greibel and a non-vanished Azir.
 
Apheori (GM): Okay, you turn back. You don't even know how far you've gone, but whatever. You can do it again. Totally.
 
Y'ALL SAIL OVER THE ARID LAND, OVER IT ALL LIKE A BIRD, MAN!
EXT. Car over open wilderness - night
...sorry.
 
Gaurav: Biiiiiiiiiiiiirdmaaaaaaan
It's dark by the time they get back to where they found the deer. They can see the lights of the village in the distance, and also a bit of a glow from the direction of the hole...
Apheori (GM): It's dark by the time you get back to where you found the deer. You see the lights of the village in the distance, and they seem to be the only lights around at all, though you couldn't even see where you were anymore...
 
You head to the sinkhole?
There's no sign of anything much else around.
 
They head for the sinkhole for a quick look.
 
 
EXT. Hole at Vermai - night
 
Now, the hole is glowing. In general, everything looks about the same as it had been when they were first there, but now, in the darkness of night, with glow. The tree. The water. The air around it. Tendrils in the rocks around. As though the glow has been seeping through the ground and coming up in places...


RHU
The glowing stuff is in the air, even, sort of like mist, some blowing away in the evening breeze, bot mostly just lingering.
Hmm. Do you think the lights will stay on long enough for us to find our way back? Of course, if we have to set up camp by the sinkhole or something, we can do that.
Ganelon: Just for a peek.
I'm not there to say hello to the hole.


RHU
No sign of Azir or the other bird. No sign of bones. Just glowing.
Okay.
Rhu drives us back to the sinkhole for a quick look
Ganelon: How are things looking?
Apheori (GM): ...glowing.
Ganelon: Worse? The same?
Apheori (GM): Seriously glowing.
Gaurav: Jus thte little tree and the pool? Or something else also?
Apheori (GM): I mean, as far as you can tell it's all back to the way it was when you first arrived... but in the darkness it's really glowing.
The tree. The water.
The air around it.
Tendrils in the rocks around.
As though the glow has been seeping through the ground and coming up in places...
Ganelon: Very troublesome.
Frezak: SORRY AZIR.
GOOD LUCK.


RHU
'''''Frezak''' (Gravy): SORRY AZIR. GOOD LUCK.
He'll be back. And - and - and he'll be glowing. It'll be awesome. You'll see.
Apheori (GM): No sign of Azir or the other bird. No sign of bones.
But man, is it glowing.
Frezak: can Radek learn anything about this?
Ganelon: From where we are?
Apheori (GM): The glowing stuff is in the air. Sort of like mist, some blowing away in the evening breeze, bot mostly just lingering.
You could totally fly into some of it.


RADEK
RADEK
Get me closer. In the air is fine.
Get me closer. In the air is fine.
Bear Soup Guy is here >_<
 
Rhu drives the car closer
They get closer while trying to not get too close.
Frezak: BEAR SOUP GUY
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+10 Arcana
(
19
)
+10
=
29


RHU
RHU
If Greibel was around, we could get him to look at the shining tree branch and see if he can work out what druidic magic made it. But alas ...
If Greibel was around, we could get him to look at the shining tree branch and see if he can work out what druidic magic made it. But alas...
Rhu motions at the flock of seagulls in the back of the car
 
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Rhu motions at the flock of seagulls in the back of the car.
Apheori (GM): BSG: Greibel is seagulls. Has been for awhile. Nobody knows what's wrong.
 
The question is... what is wrong?
Radek investigates the glow, but his results say it is totally... nothing. ''(rolled 29 arcana)'' They say it doesn't exist.
YOU PUSHED THIS QUESTION.
Wen: He fell asleep when the birds did.
okay I'll shut up now >_>
Bear Soup Guy: Clearly he came into contact with...bad fumes...from the transformation of the porridge...yessssss.....
Ganelon: Radek theorized that you lost the bird that was your druid-swarm-control-cluster and thus became a flock of unintelligent birds.
Apheori (GM): Radek: Arcana says it's totally... nothing.
Gaurav: Rasputin the Porridge has been nursing you back from health after your encounter with the tree.
Apheori (GM): It says it doesn't exist.
Bear Soup Guy: :O
yay porridge ^_^
Apheori (GM): Greibel lost a gull.
Poor gull.
Frezak: Could it be an illusion?
Fake light?
Gaurav:
rolling 1d20+7 religion check: I pray silently to Hazz'ridan and ask for any idea about what all the shining is about.
(
19
)
+7
=
26
Bear Soup Guy: YOU ARE GOD
RELIGION EYES


RADEK
RADEK
This is...
This is...
Ganelon: Can I attempt to cast magic while in this zone?
 
I am worried it may be impossible.
Rhu prays for help, asking for any idea about what all the shining is about. ''(rolled 26 religion)''
Gaurav: BSG: dude you have no idea. Get back into human form so I can tell you of all the wondrous encounters I have had with my god this day.
 
Apheori (GM): Rhu: Hazz says to keep asking questions. Don't ignore it.
Suddenly the Greibel seagulls melt together and turn into Greibel.
Zone?
You mean this general area?
You can totally attempt to cast magic.
Bear Soup Guy: Okie dokie
Ganelon: Yeah. Just to see if I can.
Bear Soup Guy: Suddenly Greibel's seagulls melt together and turn into Greibel?
Apheori (GM): Suddenly, Greibel!
Apheori (GM): Greibel: d20
Gaurav: A wild Greibel appears!
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20
(
18
)
=
18
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You have a headache, you don't really know what's going on, and you feel... disjoint. Like you're not really there. You're not really anywhere else, but you're not really entirely there, either.


RHU
RHU
Line 1,670: Line 871:
GREIBEL
GREIBEL
Hmmmmmmmmm...?
Hmmmmmmmmm...?
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You feel a sense of... cheese? And ice. And hear the crash of waves... before it fades away into a whisper in the back of your mind...
 
Greibel rubs his head
Greibel rubs his head and licks his lips at the thought of ice cheese.


THE GRAVEDIGGER
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Oh, hey Greibel.
Oh, hey Greibel.
Apheori (GM): Gan: Magic works.
 
Greibel licks his lips at the thought of ice cheese
Radek sighs in relief.
Radek sighs in relief.
Apheori (GM): What did you try to do?


RHU
RHU
 
Greibel, you're not... vegetarian, are you?
GREIBEL
you're not ... vegetarian, are you?


GREIBEL
GREIBEL
What an interesting question to ask...
What an interesting question to ask...
Bear Soup Guy: brb
Well, I talk to animals and, like, turn into them. I tried eating meat after that but it was just too weird.
Ganelon: I can suck the heat out of the area around someone (it's not harmful to them, merely things nearby) or blast stuff away from them with... sound.
The former seems safer.
And less noisy.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Ganelon: For an artificer, Radek is pretty heavy on the mechanical side as opposed to the magical one.
He uses bullets and robots far more than raw magic.
Frezak: I... have a shovel.
Apheori (GM): Only one?
Ganelon: You're also damn near impossible to kill. I consider that important.
Frezak: I have no magic!
BUT IT CAN TAKE THIS TRUCK TO MY FACE
*thud*
Ow.
Apheori (GM): It?
Frezak: Eh, I can't type for toffee.
Apheori (GM): Ah.
Dammit, BSG...
Gaurav: Who's offering toffee for typing? Tell me more.
Frezak: I cannot.
I'm bound by mystic oaths.
Also a guy said he's shoot me if I told.
Gaurav: Some day I shall learn these secrets for myself.
Frezak: And then get shot.
Apheori (GM): Getting shot is part of life.
So what do you guys do?
Ganelon: Go back to the village.
Apheori (GM): You head back. Everyone's inside.
Ganelon: I'll have to explain to the innkeeper that I won't be speaking her language, literally, when we wake up.
Frezak: TO THE INN.
Rhu locks the car up for the night and heads to the inn.
Ganelon: And unless she has a big storeroom full of magic junk for me to destroy, I likely won't be able to afford fixing that.
 
RHU
Who's bringing in the deer?
Frezak: I'll carry the remaning deer bits.
Have Radek explain that they're for the kitchen if she can do anything with it.
And hope to FUCK there's no taboo against killing deerthings here.
Apheori (GM): Snrk.
Bear Soup Guy: SORRY SORRY
My mom was telling me about important stuff
Apheori (GM): Eh, what's the worst that could happen?
Bear Soup Guy: I'm back now
Apheori (GM): BSG: Is Greibel a vegetarian?
Gaurav: We have to kill an entire village to escape?
Bear Soup Guy: Ah yes, the question
Frezak: yeah, I just spade dudes to death.
Gaurav: We might want to leave the deer in the car and have Radek ask the innkeeper first. Who knows, maybe it is taboo but she'd like a bit all the same ...


GREIBEL
The Gravedigger averts his eyes and finds some interesting dust to look at.
To Rhu: Well, I talk to animals and, like, turn into them
I tried eating meat after that but it was just too weird
Frezak: Gravy will avert his eyes.


RHU
RHU
GREIBEL
Ah. Okay. Never mind. Forget I asked.
Ah. Okay. Never mind. Forget I asked.
Frezak: And find some interesting dust to look at;


GREIBEL
GREIBEL
(groggily) Forget you asked what?
(groggily)
Forget you asked what?


THE GRAVEDIGGER
THE GRAVEDIGGER
LOOK! DUST!
LOOK! DUST!
Rhu pats Greibel on the back as we walk into the inn
 
Apheori (GM): Some dust blows down the street.
At this point they just sort of head back to the village.
Y'all enter.
 
Some folks are loitering around the common room again, but not so many as the previous night.
'''''Ganelon''' (Radek): I'll have to explain to the innkeeper that I won't be speaking her language, literally, when we wake up. And unless she has a big storeroom full of magic junk for me to destroy, I likely won't be able to afford fixing that.
Evening.
 
Thing.
 
Frezak: Timeplacewhatsit.
EXT. Hughenden inn - night
Thingummy.
 
Gaurav: Afterafternoon
Some folks are loitering around the common room again, but not so many as the previous evening. It's a bit later this time.
Apheori (GM): A guy raises his mug at ye. The inkeeper raises an eyebrow.
 
A guy raises his mug at the party as they enter. The inkeeper raises an eyebrow.
 
The Gravedigger waves at the mug dude.


RADEK
RADEK
''Good evening.''
Good evening.
Frezak: I'll wave at the mug dude.
 
Rhu looks around for the two villagers from this morning
INNKEEPER
The innkeeper: Evening to ye. Didn't expect you back so soon, but I suppose that skiff of yours had something to do with that, didn't it?
Evening to ye. Didn't expect you back so soon, but I suppose that skiff of yours had something to do with that, didn't it? Or did you make it?
Or did you make it?
Ganelon: As in build or accomplish?
Apheori (GM): Accomplish.
What's the check to notice things?


RHU
This time, however, the entire party can understand her.
Perception
Ganelon: Insight for people, otherwise that.


RHU
RHU
You can assume that we are continuously perception-ing at 10+(perception modifier)
That's not a 'skiff', it's a very fine shi - hey! I can understand you now!
Apheori (GM): Why are people special?
Gaurav: Because Perception comes from Wisdom. Insight comes from Charisma, i.e. how well you can read people.
Ganelon: Actually Insight is also wisdom.
Gaurav: oh no, insight is also wisdom
never mind
Ganelon: But it's a different skill.
Apheori (GM): Weird.
Ganelon: Perception is noticing literal details. Sights, sounds, etc.
Apheori (GM): Hey Rhu, you notice you can understand her!
Ganelon: Insight is reading emotions and making sense of those details you already see.
Stuff like that.


RHU
INNKEEPER
That's not a "skiff", it's a very fine shi-- hey! I can understand you now!
Clearly.
The innkeeper: Clearly.
(she leans forward)
Frezak: MAGIC
So you all magically speak this now? This is new.
Gaurav: Gan: see? That sounds charisma-ish to me!
The innkeeper leans forward.
The innkeeper: So you all magically speak this now? This is new.
Frezak: Do we?
Ganelon: Well, intimidate doesn't scale off of strength. Try explaining that.
Frezak: Or is it just the religious dude?
Apheori (GM): Apparently.


RADEK
RADEK
I had no part in this.
I had no part in this.
Apheori (GM): Nope, you all do.
Frezak: Huh.


RHU
RHU
Line 1,812: Line 934:


RADEK
RADEK
However, we did investigate that hole, even lost the paladin to it.
However, we did investigate that hole, even lost the paladin to it. I can say with certainty that it must be closed.
Rhu takes the old journal out of my bag to see if I can understand that, too.
Apheori (GM): Hazz is smarter than that.


GREIBEL
INNKEEPER
^
Lost?


RADEK
RADEK
I can say with certainty that it must be closed.
He's gone. Vanished. No traces.
The innkeeper: Lost?


RADEK
INNKEEPER
He's gone. Vanished. No traces.
I'm sorry to hear that. So four drinks it is.


RHU
RHU
Line 1,830: Line 949:


GREIBEL
GREIBEL
(whispers incredulously to Rhu) Weren't these people speaking other gibberish before?
(whispering incredulously to Rhu)
Weren't these people speaking other gibberish before?
 
RHU
(whispering back)
You are not going to believe what happened at the rift! Hazz'ridan spoke to us and cleared our minds! He spoke to me in my head! He seemed lost and confused.
 
GREIBEL
(whispering back)
Hazz'ridan, the God of dead ends, lost and confused. Who woulda thought?
 
RHU
(whispering back)
Every ending is another beginning. Hazz'ridan is at our side. We have a new goal now: to close the rift on this world. We cannot fail!


RADEK
RADEK
I even sent a drone in to search for him. You might be interested to know that there is, in fact, another side.
I even sent a drone in to search for him. You might be interested to know that there is, in fact, another side.
The innkeeper: I'm sorry to hear that.
 
So four drinks it is.
INNKEEPER
Do tell.


THE GRAVEDIGGER
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Drinks?
Drinks? Drinks!
Drinks!
The innkeeper pours some very small mugs of stuff for everyone.


RADEK
RADEK
Just three. I don't require nourishment.
Just three. I don't require nourishment.


RHU
INNKEEPER
(whispers back) You are not going to believe what happened at the rift! Hazz'ridan spoke to us and cleared our minds! He spoke to me in my head! He seemed lost and confused.
Oh, love, it's not about requirements. Just try it. You won't regret a thing.
The innkeeper: Do tell.
Oh, love, it's not about requirements. Just try it.
You won't regret a thing.


THE GRAVEDIGGER
The innkeeper pours some very small mugs of stuff for everyone.
Hey, do you want these meat bits?
Rhu uses his body language to show disappointment at the tinyness of the mugs, but helps himself anyway.


GREIBEL
RANDOM VILLAGER
(whispers back) Hazz'ridan, the God of dead ends, lost and confused. Who woulda thought?
(quietly)
Apheori (GM): One of the other guys at the bar says, quietly, "You'll just regret several other things."
You'll just regret several other things.


RADEK
Rhu looks disappointed at the mug size, but helps himself anyway.
Liquids have not passed my lips in decades, ma'am.
The innkeeper: Your loss.


RADEK
RADEK
And recently I seem to have even transcended a need for oxygen.
Liquids have not passed my lips in decades, ma'am. And recently I seem to have even transcended a need for oxygen.
The innkeeper drinks Radek's for him.
The innkeeper: Me eyes Gravy's meat.
Ganelon: Yeah, he's kind of a big chrome spoilsport.
The innkeeper: How much have you got?


RHU
INNKEEPER
(whispers back) Every ending is another beginning. Hazz'ridan is at our side. We have a new goal now: to close the rift on this world. We cannot fail!
Your loss.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: You realise you're drunk.


THE GRAVEDIGGER
She drinks Radek's for him.
Most of the animal.
Minus what we had for lunch.


RHU
RHU
I'm not drunk, I am perspfectly sober.
Whah... how much for another one, these are delicious.
The innkeeper brinks.
The innkeeper: Well, you've been busy.
Sure, I'll take it. How much you asking?


RHU
I know exactly what I'm sayin' and to whom I am sayin' and to what I ... how much for another one, these are delicious.
The innkeeper pours Rhu another.
The innkeeper pours Rhu another.
The Gravedigger shrugs.
 
The innkeeper: Today's on the house.
INNKEEPER
Today's on the house.


GREIBEL
GREIBEL
(to the others since Rhu is in a less whispery mood now) So how do we close this "rift" thing?
(to the others since Rhu is in a less whispery mood now)
So how do we close this 'rift' thing?
 
THE GRAVEDIGGER
(dropping a pile of deerthing on the bar)
Hey, do you want these meat bits?
 
INNKEEPER
(eyeing the meat)
How much have you got?
 
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Most of the animal. Minus what we had for lunch.
 
The innkeeper blinks.
 
INNKEEPER
Well, you've been busy. Sure, I'll take it. How much you asking?


RHU
The Gravedigger shrugs.
Good lady, you are t-- ... you are t--- ...


THE GRAVEDIGGER
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Whatever you want, it wasn't any trouble.
Whatever you want, it wasn't any trouble.
The innkeeper: I'll give you ten.
 
And do drink up.
INNKEEPER
Here for the night, too? I'll give you ten. And do drink up.


THE GRAVEDIGGER
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Sure.
Sure.
Frezak: I'll examine the drink.
 
Rhu is now examining the bartop with great interest
The Gravedigger examines his drink. It's brown, almost reddish, and despite the small amount in the mug, the bottom is completely obscured.
Apheori (GM): The drink is brown, almost reddish. It's very small, but you can't actually see the bottom of the mug.


THE GRAVEDIGGER
THE GRAVEDIGGER
(watching Rhu)
So what IS this?
So what IS this?
Ganelon: Just to be polite, I'll actually take some of this drink in a syringe.
 
Because injecting alcohol straight into your bloodstream is how the pros do it, kids. Don't try this at home.
RHU
Good lady, you are t... you are t...
 
Rhu is now examining the bartop with great interest.
 
The innkeeper pours Rhu another, almost grinning.
The innkeeper pours Rhu another, almost grinning.
The innkeeper: Shalott! The proper stuff, rather.
 
Frezak: i'm mostly watching Rhu get hammered.
INNKEEPER
The innkeeper: Not like went bad and made your friend's... friend.
Shalott! The proper stuff, rather. Not like went bad and made your friend's... friend.
Frezak: I'll drink my cup of stuff.
 
The innkeeper eyes the porridge, which climbed back onto Greibel's shoulder.
The innkeeper eyes the porridge, which is sitting on Greibel's shoulder.
 
The Gravedigger drinks his shalott.


RHU
RHU
HUH? HUH? I HEARD mnamesomesbdit.
HUH? HUH? I HEARD mnamesomesbdit.
The innkeeper pours another, mixing in from a different jug.
 
Frezak: And hope my being a seven foot slab of meat prevents me from going runny like the skinny avenger there.
Radek gives in and hands the innkeeper a syringe, indicating that she should put some of the shalott in that.
Gaurav: Oh, is Rasputin the Porridge still with us? Awesome.
 
Apheori (GM): Yeah, it doesn't hit you like it hit him.
'''''Ganelon''' (Radek): Because injecting alcohol straight into your bloodstream is how the pros do it, kids. Don't try this at home.
It's more just... kind of nice and fuzzy.
 
So how does this syringe thing work?
She takes the syringe skeptically and eyes it. Then she eyes Radek.
Gaurav: Rhu's had a big day. Good for him.
Ganelon: Like any medical syringe.
Frezak: INjecting booze right into your blood?
YOU MADMAN.
You're gonna DIE.
Apheori (GM): So you want the lady to put booze in a syringe?
Ganelon: If the lady wants me to enjoy it, yes
Frezak: Im' not joking by the way.
The innkeeper takes the syringe skeptically.
The innkeeper eyes it.
Ganelon: Because it bypasses my liver, I assume?
The innkeeper eyes Radek.
Ganelon: That probably isn't functioning any longer.


RADEK
RADEK
...What? It's efficient.
...What? It's efficient.
Frezak: yep.
 
Gaurav: Yeah, alcohol + no liver --> bad idea
INNKEEPER
The innkeeper: If this kills you, I take no responsibility.
If this kills you, I take no responsibility.
Unfortunately you've gone and got my interest, and the whole floor's watching...
Unfortunately you've gone and got my interest, and the whole floor's watching...


THE GRAVEDIGGER
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Me lays a hand on Radek.
(he lays a hand on Radek)
If you die.
If you die, I'll bury you.
I'll bury you.
 
Rhu starts mumbling a dirty song
Rhu starts mumbling a dirty song.
 
The innkeeper mixes a very small amount of dark stuff with some other stuff and waters it down a bit and adds some other stuff and pours a bit into the syringe...
The innkeeper mixes a very small amount of dark stuff with some other stuff and waters it down a bit and adds some other stuff and pours a bit into the syringe...
The innkeeper: I can't think of anything dramatic to say.
 
The innkeeper hands it over.
She holds it and pauses dramatically for a moment.
 
INNKEEPER
I can't think of anything dramatic to say.
 
She hands it over.


RADEK
RADEK
Fear not.
Fear not. With this, I prove my own immortality.
Apheori (GM): Several of the villagers boo.
 
'''''Ganelon''' (Radek): He is not immortal.
 
Some of the villagers are now cheering him on. Urging him to do it.
 
One guy in the back mutters and shakes his head.


RADEK
With this, I prove my own immortality.
Ganelon: He is not immortal.
Apheori (GM): Snrk.
Some of the villagers are now cheering him on.
Wen: two deaths in one day might not be the best thing >_>
Apheori (GM): Urging him to do it.
Do it!
Wen: Ah, but your guy ain't dead!
Radek injects the mixture into his arm.
Radek injects the mixture into his arm.
Apheori (GM): ...probably.
 
There's a long silence.
There's a long silence.
Wen takes on the role of the one guy muttering and shaking his head in the crowd
 
Apheori (GM): Radek neglects to fall over dead.
Radek neglects to fall over dead.


RADEK
RADEK
Keh heh heh.
Keh heh heh.
Apheori (GM): He does get a bit dizzy and weird feeling, though.
Told you sooo - whoah.


RADEK
Told you sooo--whoah.
The Gravedigger cheers and pats Radek on the back.
The Gravedigger cheers and pats Radek on the back.
Apheori (GM): Everyone starts clapping and cheering.
 
Everyone starts clapping and cheering.


RADEK
RADEK
Line 1,988: Line 1,112:


GREIBEL
GREIBEL
Huh....weird.
Huh... weird.
Rhu bangs the table a few times
 
The innkeeper pushes Greibel another.
Rhu bangs on the bar a few times with his mug.
Greibel looks at it for a moment
 
Greibel start sipping it slowly
The innkeeper considers giving Rhu another and then pushes it toward Greibel instead.
Ganelon: Aw yeah, getting the smart guy drunk.
 
Apheori (GM): Gravy: You standing or sitting?
Greibel looks at it for a moment before sipping it slowly.
Frezak: Male bonding coming right up.
 
I'm... standing behind Radek right now.
The Gravedigger turns around to find that large guy from before standing abnormally close to him.
Apheori (GM): Well, standing behind you is that large guy from before.
 
Both of your heads are kind of grazing the ceiling.
The Gravedigger gives him a look of the "what?" variety.
He's very close, and you realise someone is there...
 
Frezak: I'll turn around and give him a look.
LARGE GUY
Of the "what?" variety.
Hi.
Wen: uhh, is it just me or did Gan and Gaurav disappear?
Gaurav: Nope, still here.
Wen: o_O okay.
Ganelon: Don't trust the names.
Frezak: The are deceit.
*the names are deceit
Wen: well, carry on.
Wen watches with interest
Ganelon: I want to know what's up with this guy guy.
Big guy, rather.
Apheori (GM): Right, sorry.
The guy says, "Hi."
Ganelon: And also wrap things up because the hunger only intensifies.
Apheori (GM): My toe was bleeding all over the place.
Wen: ><


THE GRAVEDIGGER
THE GRAVEDIGGER
"Hello? Something you need?"
Hello? Something you need?
Ganelon: And I'm going to be prying off noodles that have been frozen together for at least 10 minutes.
 
Also yeesh, hope you're okay.
The large guy stares blankly.
Apheori (GM): The guy says nothing.
 
Frezak: I'm just gonna stare blankly for a bit.
The Gravedigger stares blankly right back.
Apheori (GM): He stares blankly as well.


THE GRAVEDIGGER
THE GRAVEDIGGER
"Oookayyy. Good luck with that."
Oookayyy. Good luck with that.
Frezak: And turn back round and see how Radek is coping.
 
Ganelon: Happily muttering obscure formulae to nobody in particular.
The Gravedigger turns back around to see how Radek is coping.
Apheori (GM): The innkeeper looks really proud of herself for that.
 
Frezak: I take it that I cannot brofist the innkeep.
Radek is happily muttering obscure formulae to nobody in particular.
Rhu notices the muttered formulae, tries to figure out how the song goes, fails. Returns to persuing the bartop.
 
Ganelon: Song?
The innkeeper looks really proud of herself for this.
No, these are formulas of SCIENCE!
 
Frezak: He doesn't know that :p
Rhu notices the muttered formulae, tries to figure out how some possibly related song goes, fails, and returns to persuing the bartop.
Ganelon: They describe the laws of the universe!
And also how to break them!
It is the fundamental theory of magic!
Maybe!
Apheori (GM): So Rhu and Radek are drunk. Eeeeexcellent.
Greibel and Gravy ain't entirely so.


RHU
A moment later, Rhu is sprawled forward across it, fast asleep.
NOT DRUNK VOLTING
 
Frezak: Gravy will not get more than buzzed.
The Gravedigger picks Rhu up and squeezes past the large guy, who is still standing right behind him, whacking the guy with a bunch of Rhu in the process.
Apheori (GM): The innkeeper wants you to drink more.
 
Frezak: Someone has to keep watch over these madmen.
The large guy just stands there looking confused.
Because they're men.
And maaaad
Apheori (GM): They ain't even doing anything. Terribly boring drunks, they are.
Frezak: THey're mumbling and muttering and stuff.
I don't think they have Drunk Proficiency.
I'll get busy telling Greibel everything that happened.
With undrunk details.
Apheori (GM): The guy is still standing behind you.
Ganelon: Just wait.
Once Radek decides it's time to get to work, you won't think he's a boring drunk any longer.
Just a dangerous madmen who should never be allowed near his own tools.
Madman, rather.
Apheori (GM): He isn't normally?
Ganelon: Hey!
Bear Soup Guy: People keep calling me on the phone and talking to me and asking stuff about things
Ganelon: I haven't USED these bombs I made. Yet.
Bear Soup Guy: I think Greibel's going to turn in early with a nice buzz
Apheori (GM): Silly people.
Rhu has fallen asleep on the bar top.
Frezak: I'll pick Rhu up.
And give the Innkeep a coin.
If I haven't already.
Apheori (GM): You sorted out the money with the deer thing, I think.
Did you ever drag that in?
Frezak: I thought I came in with it.
Gaurav: I think so, yes.
Apheori (GM): Right, so that's all sorted. You have more money, some of you are drunk, and the beds await if you need them.
Frezak: I tihnk we do.
Apheori (GM): But the guy is still standing right behind you.
Frezak: I'm gonna ignore him because he is creepy and I don't feel like burying anyone tonight.
Apheori (GM): So you just sort of bounce off him.
And push past?
Gaurav: Bouncy giants.
Frezak: Bounce off him?
Apheori (GM): Unlike you, he's a little blubbery.
Ganelon: I'll follow these guys up, but as usual, I've no intentions of sleeping.
Frezak: But why do I have to bounce off him?
Ganelon: I have a new eyebot to construct!
Frezak: I can just walk around him, no?
Bear Soup Guy: EYEBOT
Apheori (GM): Frezak: Because he was entirely too close, and massive.
Frezak: I'm just gonna move around him.
Apheori (GM): You do walk around him, but... he's really close.
Yeah.
Frezak: Well he's gonna get whacked by the Rhu over my shoulders if he doesn't move.
Apheori (GM): He doesn't move, and gets whacked.
He still doesn't move.
He looks... confused.
Frezak: Not my problem.
I have an Avenger to settle.
Rhu wakes up


Rhu wakes up a bit.
RHU
RHU
Huh? Wha? Wh?
Huh? Wha? Wh?
Line 2,105: Line 1,157:
THE GRAVEDIGGER
THE GRAVEDIGGER
You're going to bed, little man.
You're going to bed, little man.
Ganelon: http://img261.imageshack.us/img261/7744/68rocket16.jpg
This is the eyebot.


RHU
RHU
Line 2,114: Line 1,164:
Shhhhh.
Shhhhh.


Frezak: And I'm gonna go dump him on a bed.
He heads up the stairs, and Greibel and Radek follow.
Rhu mumbles, puts my thumb in my mouth and goes back to sleep
 
Gaurav: That is one awesome eyebot!
Frezak: I'll have him bunk with Radek.
Actually.
he can go with Greibel.
i'll go with RAdek since he doesn't sleep.
Ganelon: He's a diligent guard.
Except for the part where he pays no attention.
Frezak: Radek?
I picture him being in his own little world of science.
Yeah, that.
So I'll leave him with Greibel.
And then check my gear and go to sleep.
Rhu snuggles into bed and falls asleep


</pre>
INT. Hughenden inn upstairs - night
 
The Gravedigger dumps Rhu with Greibel and steers Radek into another room with himself, since Radek doesn't sleep anyway.
 
'''''Ganelon''' (Radek): He's a diligent guard. Except for the part where he pays no attention.
 
While the others sleep, Radek gets to work on another eyebot, this one with possible drunken 'enhancements'.
</screenplay>


{{holes nav
{{holes nav

Latest revision as of 16:51, 9 April 2015

≪ PreviousNext ≫
Session 6 (raw log) (Overview)
EXT. Village of Hughenden - day
While Radek talks to the villagers, the rest of the party mills about in the dustiness of the street. There's a fair bit of rubble and random stuff lying around - twisted metal, melted stone, wood that couldn't possibly be wood... the sort of thing kids would love to play on, except there don't seem to be any kids. Anywhere.
RHU
(he elbows Gravy)
There's a lot of dust here. How's the digging?
THE GRAVEDIGGER
I'm not burying dust.
RHU
(indicating the nearby buildings)
What's up with those shingles? They hurt my head.
Rhu goes and steals a shingle.
The porridge wiggles.
There is a loud thimphk sound behind them, followed by a bit of a cloud of dust rising from the impact.
Aziraphale turns to look properly and finds a kind of metal object half embedded in the ground. It is, apparently, an anvil.
RHU
Huh! Did it fall from the empty sky? Did it just appear magically behind us? What is it for?
THE GRAVEDIGGER
That's an anvil. They don't usually drop from the sky.
RHU
What's an anvil?
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Used for... shaping hot metal.
RHU
Huh. It looks dangerous, it could have killed someone. Maybe that's what happened to all the children...
AZIRAPHALE
What, an anvil dropped on them? Don't be silly.
Radek, can you ask them if stuff drops out of the sky?
RADEK
(in deslau, to one of the villagers)
Does this happen often?
Villager shrugs.
VILLAGER
(in deslau)
Sometimes. Not really.
RHU
Do we have any technology that could warn us of incoming anvils? We might need to dodge them at some point.
RADEK
The villagers don't see this sort of event often.
I have nothing on hand, at least.
AZIRAPHALE
Okay, so it's at least happened before. This is curious.
RADEK
It is, these days. Well, in our days.
AZIRAPHALE
What about the funny metal things/toys? Did those drop from the sky as well?
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Given how fast those drop, you'd need some seriously awesome detector thing.
RHU
Ah, true.
The porridge drips down Greibel's arm.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Radek, can you ask them where these came from? Piles of scrap metal isn't really what I'd expect from this level of technology.
The older villager gets up and ambles off.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
I probably wouldn't expect a rain of anvils either, though.
Greibel draws funny pictures in the dirt with a stick.
RADEK
(in deslau)
Where did this metal come from?
VILLAGER
(in deslau)
You know.
RADEK
(in deslau)
Nowhere?
VILLAGER
(in deslau)
Oh, totally. I'm sure it just appeared one day. Everything came from somewhere, right? Except where did it all come from before there was a SOMEWHERE for it to come from, hmm?
The villager nods sagely.
Radek grumbles.
RADEK
He doesn't know. Another rift in space, I assume.


EXT. Car - day
The party returns to the car to head out, with Rhu retaking the driver's seat, and the others piling in around.
There's a rough drawing of a tree on the dash with something written under it.
Rhu realises he sat on something.
RHU
Huh?
He finds a string of beads.
RHU
Huh! Do these beads mean anything to anyone?
There's some shrugging and general dissent.
RADEK
(indicating the drawing)
...It says 'guard'.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Ominous.
RHU
Yeah, maybe it's magical? Maybe it 'guards' us? Also, what's with the tree?
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Either it's 'beware the tree' or 'the tree is a guard' or the tree means nothing and it's just general blabbings.
RADEK
I'm inclined to believe the latter. I'm a scientist.
AZIRAPHALE
Hmm... I don't think we can gain much information from that alone. Let's go to the sinkhole.
They fly off toward the sinkhole.


EXT. Hole at Vermai - day
The car ship flies toward what turns out to be a really large, mostly dead tree with a bit of a sinkhole right next to it.
The tree dwarfs the surrounding trees, and has a much smaller tree, which is still alive, apparently growing out of the side of it.
The sinkhole is mostly just a really dusty, dry-looking sinkhole.
GREIBEL
(to Rhu)
Of course I can talk to bears, silly.
RADEK
From what I've been told, approaching any further would be unwise.
They stop in midair a fair distance away.
RHU
One of these trees might be our dashboard tree. But which one?
RADEK
Don't ask me. I don't deal in organics.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
This is all really weird. That living one isn't the same kind as the big one. And I don't see roots.
That's really weird.
RHU
I dunno. Compared to Sarathi, this is almost mundane. So far.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
It might not be a tree. Maybe something trying to look like one.
RHU
Griebel, do your flock of seagulls thing!
GREIBEL
And I raaaan. I raaan so faaar awaaaaay.
Wait, maybe that's the wrong band...
Greibel turns into birds and then sends one bird out to approach the tree.
It seems normal enough. Hello, tree. Nice tree. It lands. A tree. A little bit ill, a little bit lush, but not something dangerous. Smells just fine. Feels just fine.
Then the flock of Greibel all sort of just falls asleep. (rolled 7 reality)
THE GRAVEDIGGER
There. See. That's not normal.
The porridge sits on Greibel's seat emitting an aura of loneliness, and oozes over one of the birds, partially enveloping it in a strange sort of hug.
Rhu reaches out to pat the porridge reassuringly, but the porridge cowers away from his hand.
Aziraphale fidgets, feeling the hole calling to him. (rolled 11 reality)
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Someone poke the rest of Greibel, would you?
RHU
OY BIRDS. WAKE UP.
The birds in the car neglect to wake up.
The bird on the tree falls off the branch and tumbles into the hole. (rolled 3 reality)
Aziraphale, meanwhile, loses control in light of the power of the hole's call and climbs out of the car, falling to the ground. (rolled 1 reality)
He continues crawling toward it on the ground.
RHU
Azir! Dammit.
RADEK
Oh, great.
Rhu directs the car to land between Aziraphale and the hole.
RADEK
Gravy, hold him back.
As the vehicle passes over Aziraphale, the Gravedigger jumps out, landing on top of him and pinning him down.
Aziraphale recovers slightly and stops trying to crawl into the sinkhole. (rolled 17 reality)
The flock of Greibel also wakes up a bit and makes some funny bird noises. (rolled 8 reality)
From here, the contents of the sinkhole are much more visible. Said contents seem to just be water. It looks disappointingly normal.
AZIRAPHALE
Hey, Gravy, get off me, I feel better now.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Promise not to start running into that hole?
AZIRAPHALE
Probably not.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Hmm.
The Gravedigger gets off Aziraphale, but remains close in case he runs again.
RHU
So investigate the hole on foot? And hope we don't all fall asleep?
AZIRAPHALE
I think it'll be a better idea if two people take a look. And that two people shouldn't include me.
RADEK
Let's start with something useless.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
What, throw a rock?
Radek glances at Greibel.
RADEK
(quietly)
Like... a rock. Yes.
RHU
...can Greibel turn into a giant spider? Spiders are good at holes. Or tunnels, at any rate.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
It looked like it had water at the bottom. If there's a magic ripping hole in there, it's invisible.
AZIRAPHALE
Isn't one part of Greibel already in the hole? It might have drowned. It might have fallen through time. Frankly I have no idea.
The rest of Greibel just sits there making noises.
RHU
I could go with the rope tied around me. I'm pretty light. Or lithe.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
I'll look.
Aziraphale fidgets and then gets tackled by the Gravedigger again.
Radek gets out of the car as well and impatiently heads for the edge of the hole in order to peer in properly. The water in the sinkhole is actually quite pretty, with shades of blue and green fading to black at its depths...
THE GRAVEDIGGER
SOMEONE GRAB RADEK.
I have my hands full of paladin here.
RADEK
I'll be fine! I'm coated in the stuff of time and non-existence.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
FINE THEN.
RHU
If we want to do the rope thing, we need to do that now and then back away. Otherwise we're all going to get mentally dragged into the hole.
Radek tosses a rock into the hole and it splashes into the water, exactly like a rock should do.
Then the rock bobs back up to the surface and floats, exactly like a rock shouldn't do.
RADEK
Alright, hand me a rope.
Rhu looks around for anything else around the hole and spots the seagull back in the tree. (rolled 22 perception)
RHU
Hey! Isn't that a bit of Greibel?
He looks again and the gull is gone.
RHU
Hey, where did it go?
Radek makes Rhu move the car over the hole and tie a rope to it, and hastily ties the other end of the rope around his waist.
As Rhu watches, peering down into the hole, he feels all of his problems just fade away. All of the horror of the past few days just melts... (rolled 5 reality)
RHU
That water looks really cool and refreshing... maybe a short swim will help us think about this problem better?
Aziraphale fidgets.
Radek dives into the hole. (rolled 4 reality) The rope goes taut with him hanging a couple meters above the water.
RHU
The water. So relaxing.
Radek hangs over the water. He suddenly realises how much he loves the hole. How wonderful it is. (rolled 1 reality) How he could be one with the hole. All of the hole. The hole.
RADEK
THIS HOLE IS GREAT!
Lower the car! I haven't hit the surface yet!
On one of the car seats, where nobody is looking, a porridge-wrapped seagull fidgets.
Rhu fidgets and lowers the car.
By the edge, Aziraphale continues to fidget, and the Gravedigger lets go. Aziraphale just stays put for the time being.
Frezak (Gravy): I might as well just pitch everyone into the hole at this point.
As Radek is lowered into the water, he submerges with a plop and sinks. The water is dark and watery and fairly clear, and there is very little of interest.
The Gravedigger throws some random bits of junk into the water. A handaxe. Some rocks. The handaxe sinks. The rocks float.
Radek sees an axe drifting down nearby before suddenly disappearing, and climbs up the rope back to the surface of the water.
RADEK
Who just threw an axe at me!?
Aziraphale sees bones. All around Sticking out of the ground. Piled up. Littered about. (rolled 7 reality)
AZIRAPHALE
Hey, guys, there are bones here. There are...
(he looks more closely at them)
Plastic bones here!
RADEK
Plastic bones? Who cares! The axe disappeared!
THE GRAVEDIGGER
That... sounds like a decoy.
AZIRAPHALE
(indicating the bones that only he can see)
Come look!
The Gravedigger plods over to test the bones, but he doesn't see any.
Aziraphale sweeps his arms to point at the bones all around them.
AZIRAPHALE
You can't see them?
THE GRAVEDIGGER
GODS FUCKING DAMMIT. THIS IS HOPELESS.
I'm gonna go back and become a helpful member of some community.
RHU
Radek, what does the water smell like?
RADEK
You tell me! I can't smell things!
Aziraphale ignores the bones and instead walks back to the sinkhole. They don't matter. (rolled 2 reality)
Gravy follows. (rolled 2 reality) It looks so... nice... A way home. A way out of this. A way to just go somewhere away from the crazy...
RHU
HEY!
AZIRAPHALE
I want to go in. I really want to go in. I think I should go in.
RHU
(jumping out of the car)
WAIT! COME BACK!
Aziraphale starts taking off the more unwieldy bits of his gear as he goes, and sits down at the edge, looking down.
AZIRAPHALE
Yes. I think I should. Come, the rest of you, why don't you?
RADEK
(from the water's surface)
If that water made an axe disappear, I'd encourage you to think about what it'll do to you.
AZIRAPHALE
It looks so nice... peaceful. What can it do? I'm insane and seeing bones y'all can't see. We got jumped to another planet. Everyone on Sarathi is dead.
(he looks back at the others)
Well... if you're not following...
Aziraphale edges forward and dives in, hitting the water with a splash.
Rhu mutters something under his breath.
For a moment, nothing happens. Then there's a horrible sucking squelching noise, and the water level suddenly starts lowering until it all drains out the bottom... leaving a dry stone base a few hundred feet down.
There are some bits of metal and wood on the ground under the rift. And a feather.
No longer supported by the water, Radek falls back to the end of the rope.
Aziraphale is just... gone.
RADEK
I warned him.
Rhu gasps, then quickly mumbles a prayer to Hazz'ridan.
Wen (Aziraphale): Something about how it's not really death, I just got an express ticket to the dead end.
Hazz'ridan blesses Rhu with his mind back, properly back, and suddenly everything becomes so much clearer. Before, it had only been mostly back. It had seemed back, but it wasn't, not really.
Rhu realises he's surrounded by CRAZY EVERYWHERE. His companions are losing it. Reality itself is shifting around them. And within the sinkhole, the rift in reality is actually visible now, the source of all of this, the madness, the insanity.
It's a strange little rippling thing in the air, not far from where Radek is hanging.
That's the real hole.
The rest just sort of... happened on top of it.
Rhu blinks.
Rhu blinks again. The hole is still there.
Rhu goes down on one knee and prays to Hazz'ridan to reveal the truth to all his companions. Suddenly he feels the warm, loving embrace of TENTACLES EVERYWHERE.
The Gravedigger stops heading for the hole.
The seagulls start dancing.
Radek, hanging next to the rift, suddenly sees it too, and gives it a good look-over. (rolled 13 arcana)
RADEK
Hmph.
Now this is more like it.
RHU
(he points)
That's it. That's the hole. Shimmering. There.
Rhu decidedly doesn't mention the bit about the tentacles.
RADEK
This, my... companions, is a rift in space.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Great.
RADEK
That's all I can tell you about it.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
So it's a hole, like the willagers said.
RHU
Well, we found it. At terrible cost, but we found it.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Azi might be hanging around naked on the other side.
RHU
Oooh, perhaps.
Rhu prays to Hazz'ridan to keep Azir safe.
Radek notices some of his coating is starting to seep into the rope. He quickly unties himself and drops to the bottom of the sinkhole, under the rift itself. The air there is oddly charged, as though full of static.
The bits on the ground turn out to be some shredded twigs and stuff. The metal is just as shredded.
There's a bit of a confusion as the others have a go at first getting down a rope long enough, and then hauling Radek entirely out of the sinkhole, with, naturally, no actual help from Radek himself.
Once out, Radek hands over the random bits to the Gravedigger, who looks them over. (rolled 21 nature)
THE GRAVEDIGGER
This was my axe. I don't think that Azi is alive.
RHU
If Azir is dead, we can ressurrect him from any fragment of his body, if one of those bits are fragments from his body.
If he has been teleported elsehwere or something, then no.
Gaurav (Rhu): I heard this on the Penny Arcade D&D game, so I don't know how true it is.
RADEK
Do you see any of his parts laying around?
Rhu looks around and notices that the smaller tree on the larger, dead tree is glowing. It looks like druid magic.
RHU
Oh, maybe some of those squiggles meant 'the tree that glows'. The water glowed too. Maybe it was also part of some kind of protection system?
In which case, is anybody nervous that we seem to be turning all the protection systems off? Shouldn't we investigate this rift? It might have something to do with Sarathi. Reality breaking down and all that. Although to be honest, this rift is much better behaved than Sarathi was.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
What can we do with this? I've no idea.
RHU
Poke it with a stick? See if it destroys the stick, anyhow.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Well it fucked up my axe. You try something.
Rhu throws stones at the rift.
The first couple are shredded. Another bounces off. One of them just sort of disappears.
Rhu prays to Hazz'ridan for wisdom in dealing correctly with this dangerous rift.
He gets a gist of a response: The rift is a dead end. This is a world of dead ends, with ends getting ever deader as time goes on. Hazz'ridan should be pleased, but he is not, for they are not his dead ends. They are something else entirely, and this is very, very bad. They need to get to the bottom of it, because the other gods seem inclined to utterly ignore it, and Rhu is the first mortal of his to have even gone near it. And survived.
Radek summons his eyebot and flies it down into the sinkhole, and then tries to send it into the rift.
The first time, it just bounces off and tumbles to the ground. (rolled 1 reality) It still seems to be intact, however, and Radek gets it back into the air a moment later.
RHU
Oh phew. Try again?
The second time, it goes in without issue. (rolled 12 reality)
Through the eyebot, Radek observes a horrible darkness. It is surrounded by horrible darkness, floating in horrible.
It flies around the horrible, encountering more horrible darkness.
It bounces off something.
Then there's light everywhere and it's tumbling through the light. It's flying over a beach now. Sand. Sea. Palm trees.
A pile of dead spikey sea creatures nearby.
No sign of the paladin.
Tracks in the sand, belonging to some alien creature.
RADEK
Fascinating. Also, horrible.
But it does seem that some manner of stable environment exists on the other side of this rift. It's in no better shape.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Not much use unless you have idea how to get trhough safely. Since being shredded is still possible.
And I don't want to be shredded.
Getting closer, it seems the palm trees are dead, like they were just dried out suddenly. And the rift on this side is enormous. It stretches across the beach, into the waves, which just sort of slice around it, and up the sky and overhead.
RADEK
...Oh my. We're looking at a much larger hole on the other side.
The light over the beach is darker than it should be, and getting darker, shifting to purple...
Around the eyebot, reality folds in on itself.
Everything goes dark, but the connection remains. The eyebot is still there. Somewhere.
RADEK
We... are going to want to close this. And I'm going to need a new robot.
RHU
Hazz'ridan would see a dead end here where the roads cut across space and time. We must close this. He wills it.
This new darkness seems to be different from the previous one. The eyebot's sensors indicate it to just be some sort of dark room.
Radek has the eyebot shoot its laser, illuminating what turns out to be a large cavern, full of stalagtagamiteses. There's no visible rift here, but the space around seems to ripple in shimmer in the light before it goes out.
RADEK
First a beach, now a cave...
Radek flies the eyebot about through the cavern, mapping out a portion. As it moves, it encounters pockets of more and less resistance; The air is funny, but also the space is funny.
Then it passes through a thinner patch and it's somewhere else once again.
This looks like Sarathi. Same style of architecture, same sort of technology, at least. It's in a building, in an open area full of tables and rubble and sunlight. Some overgrown plants reach toward the openings in the walls and ceiling.
The connection, however, is getting tenuous at best, as though it has been getting further and further away with each passage...
Radek flies the eyebot toward one of the cracks in the building wall, revealing a vista that very definitely is Sarathi. This city, however, it utterly demolished. Few buildings remain past their foundations, as though they had collapsed after a a great battle.
The sky, however, is ordinary enough. A bit of a smoky haze lies around the horizons. Billowy clouds drift overhead. Three moons are also visible, though the Sarathi they'd gone to had only had two.
Then the connection goes out entirely.
RADEK
Blast.
Well, it reached Sarathi, and the sky was much more agreeable this time. The place is utterly destroyed. Although, I wouldn't assume that it discovered the planet at the same 'present' we are enjoying right now.
RHU
Yes. I think we should try to close this hole now, then see if we can't find a city and report back to HQ on all this holes business.
RADEK
I don't think there is a city to find here. We should count ourselves lucky if this planet is simply underdeveloped, and not in the past itself.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Any of what you'd call technology on this world is not native.
RHU
Oh, right. The past.
There's a bit of a gurgling bubbling noise from the bottom of the sinkhole, and muddy water begins to seep back into it.
Radek uses the ropes to take a sample of the water.
RHU
Hazz'ridan, God of Dead Ends, is displeased by this state of affairs and would like us to close this hole. He would like this very, very much.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Well maybe he could tell us how. Else he can go bury himself.
RHU
I'll ask him.
Rhu prays to Hazz'ridan, maker of ends, for wisdom in the ways of closing rifts in space and time.
HAZZ'RIDAN
(such that only Rhu can hear him)
I do not know. This is the first time anyone has ever gotten so far at all. Find out.
RADEK
I couldn't care less what your god would like us to do, but in the interests of my own survival, I'm closing this hole.
RHU
Hazz'ridan is alas unable to help us, but encourages us to find a way. He says nobody else has ever gotten this far to sorting this mess out so I guess we're ahead of the crowd there.
HAZZ'RIDAN
(such that only Rhu can hear him)
And then maybe if you could be so good as to beat Kyrule over the head with it, everything can go back to fine and normal with good and proper dead ends like there are supposed to be.
RHU
(muttering)
Amen.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
So your god is as clueless as us. WHoop-dee-doo.
RADEK
So we need to do all the work ourselves. Nothing new there.
HAZZ'RIDAN
(such that only Rhu can hear him)
Get to the bottom of this. It spans worlds, universes, that were never meant to be connected. You have been pulled from your own, and that you wound up here is a greater blessing than you could have imagined. You are not alone here, and this shall not be your dead end.
Rhu repeats this to the group. They basically ignore him.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Well do you have any idea how to close it, Radek?
RADEK
None. Dealing in spatial instabilities is a hobby of mine at best.
RHU
Amadi seemed to know a thing or two. I wonder if we could get her back somehow. Maybe if we could figure out where Midnight was. Or when.
RADEK
Well, she didn't show up while I was working.
In the sinkhole, the water level is still rising, but as it approaches the level of the rift, the rift seems to be trying to twist away from the surface. Like it doesn't like it.
RHU
So the rift was covered in water it dislikes and with a tree overhead to 'guard' it or something. But it didn't work, because this planet has had a bad time of it. So maybe us uncovering it made it worse? Maybe together they can't be destroyed but once the rift is unprotected it can be? So many questions.
We could go back to the village and try to find someone who understands this better than us.
RADEK
It's as good a place to start as any.
They all pile back into the car.
The Gravedigger grabs a piece of wood and tosses it at the rift. It bounces off.
The Gravedigger grabs another piece of wood, dunks it in Radek's water sample, and then tosses it at the rift as well. It goes in.
Frezak (Gravy): Dammit. I forgot that sometimes things go in and sometimes they don't, regardles off what they are.
The water continues to rise and finally hits the rift regardless of its vague attempts to avoid it. The rippling effect spreads through the water, filling it with odd shards of wrongness, as though the water itself took on the properties of the rift.
Radek, clearly interested in this change, takes another water sample, though as it's detached from the rest it goes back to looking the same as ever.
As the rift is covered entirely, they feel it calling to them again, the same pull of the hole as they'd felt earlier, getting stronger the more it fills. This time it isn't overpowering, however, and isn't compelling anyone to actually do anything.
The water is full of shimmers.
RHU
We should maybe get out of here. Before it gets any stronger.
RADEK
Please do.
Without further ado, they turn the car toward the village and head back.


EXT. Car over open wilderness - afternoon
They fly around a bit, checking out the area. A big dry river over there. Some mountains in the distance which look like they might have some real life on them. A whole lot of desert in the other direction.
Some deer-like things further off.
A general agreement to maybe hunt the things is established, and they head in that direction.
When they get in range, Radek takes aim with his rifle.
RADEK
Intact body, right?
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Yeah. You can pop the head or bleed it out, though.
Radek fires and misses. (rolled 12 vs AC)
They get a little closer, and the Gravedigger throws a grappling hook and rope at a running deerthing below them. It tangles around the deerthing's legs, and the deerthing is pulled into the air below them. (rolled 20 vs AC)
RADEK
Showoff.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
YEEEE-HAAAWWWW.
Pull up!
Rhu does so, and the deerthing swings about chaotically below them, making funny noises.
The Gravedigger hauls the thing up a bit and then unexpectedly winds up with a pile of thrashing deerthing in his lap when one of the swings takes it over the side of the car.
The Gravedigger headbutts it to death.
Frezak (Gravy): Those guys probably think that headbutting how hunters used to do it in the olden days. "It's an ancient, accredited technique. Shut up."
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Now, a spot to gut and clean this. Any rivers?
They fly on, but all the rivers nearby seem to be dry. So they follow pick one and follow the riverbed for a time. It passes through plains and desert, the land randomly switching between the two.
Later, they come to something of a canyon, dry but deep. Then the river passes underground for a time, and they fly over a ridge, and further down is more canyon. Here, there is some water in it. A trickle.
Later still, the river gets bigger, mountains sort of rise around it, it goes through some hills, snakes around some much greener area, and gets a whole lot larger very, very suddenly, with tributaries and everything.
It seems to head over mountains in the distance, and beyond, perhaps to the coast, but for now they head down to park.


EXT. Deslan riverside - evening
The party gets out by the river and sets up to roast the deer. The Gravedigger carries a tree over to the camp before setting down to clean the carcass while Rhu builds up a fire. Radek goes through his things and does some miscellaneous science in the meantime.
Greibel is still seagulls and sitting in the car like a flock of disoriented, bemused seagulls somehow attached to a car.
Once everything is cleaned up and the fire good and low, the Gravedigger starts off by roasting some legs and passes hunks of the result around while the rest burns down for the villagers.
Ganelon (Radek): I don't suppose I could just consume its soul, huh? But, you know, not to be evil or anything. It's just easier to eat that way.
Ganelon (Radek): Waste no part of the animal and all, y'know. Yeah, you've got the meat, bones, organs, and blood, but what about the life? That's where the old man comes in.
Gaurav (Rhu): What would happen if you ate the soul of a creature without killing the body?
Frezak (Gravy): In D&D? You just get a... mindless person. An awake but not concious body.
Ganelon (Radek): I guess it couldn't really feed itself, though.
Frezak (Gravy): Nope. It'd just stand there. Or sit. Or whatever position it was in when you sucked the soul out.
Radek takes his hunk and efficiently sucks out everything strictly beneficial about it and injects himself with that, leaving an awful, flavorless slab of dry meat behind.
Ganelon (Radek): It's how I'd eat if I were able.
Frezak (Gravy): It probably looks... icky. Grey. Dry. DEAD. It's the corpse of food.
The Gravedigger eats a leg of deerthing.
Rhu mimics the Gravedigger and tries to eat a leg of deerthing as well, but only gets through part of it.
They wind up throwing bits of the rest of it at the Greibel seagulls, which, though they're not acting all that intelligent at the moment, do seem to be aware enough to eat at the bits.
RADEK
Do you suppose his core intelligence was destroyed and we're simply feeding the instinct-driven remains of his 'body'?
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Or he could just be really stoned.
RHU
I'm sure he'll be back. Once he remembers how.
RADEK
I've never paid much mind to druids. They're always going on about nature, like it holds secrets we haven't exhausted millennia ago.
A worthless profession, druidism.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Could be a passtime.
RADEK
For this one?
RHU
I don't know about that, Radek. A druid set up the little tree at the rift, and possibly also the waterlike thing. Maybe once we convince Greibel to unbirdify, we could get his opinion on the magic underlying them.
While they're at this, the sun sets.
RHU
Let's get back before it gets too dark.
They pack up and head back.


EXT. Car over open wilderness - night
It's dark by the time they get back to where they found the deer. They can see the lights of the village in the distance, and also a bit of a glow from the direction of the hole...
There's no sign of anything much else around.
They head for the sinkhole for a quick look.


EXT. Hole at Vermai - night
Now, the hole is glowing. In general, everything looks about the same as it had been when they were first there, but now, in the darkness of night, with glow. The tree. The water. The air around it. Tendrils in the rocks around. As though the glow has been seeping through the ground and coming up in places...
The glowing stuff is in the air, even, sort of like mist, some blowing away in the evening breeze, bot mostly just lingering.
No sign of Azir or the other bird. No sign of bones. Just glowing.
Frezak (Gravy): SORRY AZIR. GOOD LUCK.
RADEK
Get me closer. In the air is fine.
They get closer while trying to not get too close.
RHU
If Greibel was around, we could get him to look at the shining tree branch and see if he can work out what druidic magic made it. But alas...
Rhu motions at the flock of seagulls in the back of the car.
Radek investigates the glow, but his results say it is totally... nothing. (rolled 29 arcana) They say it doesn't exist.
RADEK
This is...
Rhu prays for help, asking for any idea about what all the shining is about. (rolled 26 religion)
Suddenly the Greibel seagulls melt together and turn into Greibel.
RHU
GREIBEL!
GREIBEL
Hmmmmmmmmm...?
Greibel rubs his head and licks his lips at the thought of ice cheese.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Oh, hey Greibel.
Radek sighs in relief.
RHU
Greibel, you're not... vegetarian, are you?
GREIBEL
What an interesting question to ask...
Well, I talk to animals and, like, turn into them. I tried eating meat after that but it was just too weird.
The Gravedigger averts his eyes and finds some interesting dust to look at.
RHU
Ah. Okay. Never mind. Forget I asked.
GREIBEL
(groggily)
Forget you asked what?
THE GRAVEDIGGER
LOOK! DUST!
At this point they just sort of head back to the village.
Ganelon (Radek): I'll have to explain to the innkeeper that I won't be speaking her language, literally, when we wake up. And unless she has a big storeroom full of magic junk for me to destroy, I likely won't be able to afford fixing that.


EXT. Hughenden inn - night
Some folks are loitering around the common room again, but not so many as the previous evening. It's a bit later this time.
A guy raises his mug at the party as they enter. The inkeeper raises an eyebrow.
The Gravedigger waves at the mug dude.
RADEK
Good evening.
INNKEEPER
Evening to ye. Didn't expect you back so soon, but I suppose that skiff of yours had something to do with that, didn't it? Or did you make it?
This time, however, the entire party can understand her.
RHU
That's not a 'skiff', it's a very fine shi - hey! I can understand you now!
INNKEEPER
Clearly.
(she leans forward)
So you all magically speak this now? This is new.
RADEK
I had no part in this.
RHU
Hmm. If it is a gift of the great Hazz'ridan, then maybe Greibel won't have it, since he was a flock of seagulls at the time?
RADEK
However, we did investigate that hole, even lost the paladin to it. I can say with certainty that it must be closed.
INNKEEPER
Lost?
RADEK
He's gone. Vanished. No traces.
INNKEEPER
I'm sorry to hear that. So four drinks it is.
RHU
He'll be back. I'm sure of it.
GREIBEL
(whispering incredulously to Rhu)
Weren't these people speaking other gibberish before?
RHU
(whispering back)
You are not going to believe what happened at the rift! Hazz'ridan spoke to us and cleared our minds! He spoke to me in my head! He seemed lost and confused.
GREIBEL
(whispering back)
Hazz'ridan, the God of dead ends, lost and confused. Who woulda thought?
RHU
(whispering back)
Every ending is another beginning. Hazz'ridan is at our side. We have a new goal now: to close the rift on this world. We cannot fail!
RADEK
I even sent a drone in to search for him. You might be interested to know that there is, in fact, another side.
INNKEEPER
Do tell.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Drinks? Drinks!
RADEK
Just three. I don't require nourishment.
INNKEEPER
Oh, love, it's not about requirements. Just try it. You won't regret a thing.
The innkeeper pours some very small mugs of stuff for everyone.
RANDOM VILLAGER
(quietly)
You'll just regret several other things.
Rhu looks disappointed at the mug size, but helps himself anyway.
RADEK
Liquids have not passed my lips in decades, ma'am. And recently I seem to have even transcended a need for oxygen.
INNKEEPER
Your loss.
She drinks Radek's for him.
RHU
Whah... how much for another one, these are delicious.
The innkeeper pours Rhu another.
INNKEEPER
Today's on the house.
GREIBEL
(to the others since Rhu is in a less whispery mood now)
So how do we close this 'rift' thing?
THE GRAVEDIGGER
(dropping a pile of deerthing on the bar)
Hey, do you want these meat bits?
INNKEEPER
(eyeing the meat)
How much have you got?
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Most of the animal. Minus what we had for lunch.
The innkeeper blinks.
INNKEEPER
Well, you've been busy. Sure, I'll take it. How much you asking?
The Gravedigger shrugs.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Whatever you want, it wasn't any trouble.
INNKEEPER
Here for the night, too? I'll give you ten. And do drink up.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Sure.
The Gravedigger examines his drink. It's brown, almost reddish, and despite the small amount in the mug, the bottom is completely obscured.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
(watching Rhu)
So what IS this?
RHU
Good lady, you are t... you are t...
Rhu is now examining the bartop with great interest.
The innkeeper pours Rhu another, almost grinning.
INNKEEPER
Shalott! The proper stuff, rather. Not like went bad and made your friend's... friend.
The innkeeper eyes the porridge, which is sitting on Greibel's shoulder.
The Gravedigger drinks his shalott.
RHU
HUH? HUH? I HEARD mnamesomesbdit.
Radek gives in and hands the innkeeper a syringe, indicating that she should put some of the shalott in that.
Ganelon (Radek): Because injecting alcohol straight into your bloodstream is how the pros do it, kids. Don't try this at home.
She takes the syringe skeptically and eyes it. Then she eyes Radek.
RADEK
...What? It's efficient.
INNKEEPER
If this kills you, I take no responsibility.
Unfortunately you've gone and got my interest, and the whole floor's watching...
THE GRAVEDIGGER
(he lays a hand on Radek)
If you die, I'll bury you.
Rhu starts mumbling a dirty song.
The innkeeper mixes a very small amount of dark stuff with some other stuff and waters it down a bit and adds some other stuff and pours a bit into the syringe...
She holds it and pauses dramatically for a moment.
INNKEEPER
I can't think of anything dramatic to say.
She hands it over.
RADEK
Fear not. With this, I prove my own immortality.
Ganelon (Radek): He is not immortal.
Some of the villagers are now cheering him on. Urging him to do it.
One guy in the back mutters and shakes his head.
Radek injects the mixture into his arm.
There's a long silence.
Radek neglects to fall over dead.
RADEK
Keh heh heh.
Told you sooo - whoah.
The Gravedigger cheers and pats Radek on the back.
Everyone starts clapping and cheering.
RADEK
I had forgotten what this feels like.
GREIBEL
Huh... weird.
Rhu bangs on the bar a few times with his mug.
The innkeeper considers giving Rhu another and then pushes it toward Greibel instead.
Greibel looks at it for a moment before sipping it slowly.
The Gravedigger turns around to find that large guy from before standing abnormally close to him.
The Gravedigger gives him a look of the "what?" variety.
LARGE GUY
Hi.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Hello? Something you need?
The large guy stares blankly.
The Gravedigger stares blankly right back.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Oookayyy. Good luck with that.
The Gravedigger turns back around to see how Radek is coping.
Radek is happily muttering obscure formulae to nobody in particular.
The innkeeper looks really proud of herself for this.
Rhu notices the muttered formulae, tries to figure out how some possibly related song goes, fails, and returns to persuing the bartop.
A moment later, Rhu is sprawled forward across it, fast asleep.
The Gravedigger picks Rhu up and squeezes past the large guy, who is still standing right behind him, whacking the guy with a bunch of Rhu in the process.
The large guy just stands there looking confused.
Rhu wakes up a bit.

RHU

Huh? Wha? Wh?
THE GRAVEDIGGER
You're going to bed, little man.
RHU
Hmf. No. Not sleepy. Five more minutes.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Shhhhh.
He heads up the stairs, and Greibel and Radek follow.


INT. Hughenden inn upstairs - night
The Gravedigger dumps Rhu with Greibel and steers Radek into another room with himself, since Radek doesn't sleep anyway.
Ganelon (Radek): He's a diligent guard. Except for the part where he pays no attention.
While the others sleep, Radek gets to work on another eyebot, this one with possible drunken 'enhancements'.


≪ PreviousNext ≫
Session 6 (Overview)
Retrieved from ‘https://wiki.zaori.org/w/index.php?title=Holes/Session_6&oldid=3124’

This is the house of voodoo. Bat lungs and eel bladders and all.