Difference between revisions of "Holes/Session 49"

A fragment of the Garden of Remembering
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<pre>
<screenplay>
Apheori (GM) pokes roll20.
EXT. Woods - day
Apheori (GM): Frezak?
 
Can we start?
The Gravedigger is leading the party east through the woods. The going seems to be largely uphill.
Ganelon: Well you got my attention.
 
Apheori (GM): Is there cake?
Amadi is no longer with them, having randomly poofed somewhere along the way.
Yay!
 
Apheori (GM) kidnaps Gan.
'''''Frezak''' (Gravy): We may not be led in the right direction, but at least we're being led with a veneer of confidence.
Apheori (GM): Right, so, we have everyone but Ellemerr.
'''''Ganelon''' (Radek): Misplaced confidence, at that.
Gravy was being guide because as it turned out, Greibel was probably going the wrong direction. If you want to believe a 15.
 
Frezak (GM): We may not be led in the right direction, but at least we're being led with a veneer of confidence.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Ganelon: Misplaced confidence, at that.
I sense... a tree. I speak sooth! Come, friends.
Apheori (GM): You are now going eastish through the woods.
 
I need to find the map/
RHU
.
(looking around at all the other trees nearby)
Gaurav: http://wiki.zaori.org/wiki/File:Holes_dorgin_area_map.jpg
''A'' tree?
Apheori (GM): Huh, you're headed inland.
 
That means the airship would have been going to/from Rameris or something thatway...
RADEK
The buckets?
...This is how I'm going to die, isn't it?
I am so confused.
 
Gaurav: How close did we get to those hostile trees? I'm imagining them getting all excited to see adventurers and raring for a fight, only to see us turn away and head back the way we came.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Maybe it overshot Dorgin?
Don't be silly, Radek. You're going to die at the hands of your second-greatest invention.
Apheori (GM): Uh... like a 20-minute walk away.
 
Hmm, maybe.
The Gravedigger pats Radek reassuringly.
An infestation of lemurs would do that.
 
Gaurav: o.0
Greibel detours slightly to head toward the tree, and the Gravedigger redirects to follow him.
Apheori (GM): Who wants to unlose the party?
 
Actually, no, Gravy is confident.
RHU
Whatever, sorry.
(to Greibel)
Gravy: Nature.
Oy!
Frezak (GM):
 
rolling 1D20+11
(
11
)
+11
=
22
Apheori (GM): Okay.
It probably really is the right direction.
Also you seem to be headed uphill.
Greibel: You sense that really big tree nearby.
The Gravedigger: I sense... a tree.
I speak sooth!
Come, friends.
Apheori (GM): Fine, I guess he did too.
Actually that makes sense.
Frezak (GM): Oops
Apheori (GM): WEIRD NATURE PEOPLE.
Frezak (GM): thought hat we me >.>
Apheori (GM): Eh, it does make sense.
Rhu: _A_ tree?
Gaurav: I assume we're still surrounded by trees here.
Apheori (GM): Oh, and Amadi poofed at some point.
Before this.
In the woods.
Radek: ...This is how I'm going to die, isn't it?
Frezak (GM): Can I roll Prophecy on how Radek will die?
Apheori (GM): You're surrounded. But this one is really big! THE really big one, for Greibel.
Frezak (GM): Or can I just make one?
Bear Soup Guy: Sorry, I was stopped and made to help build a grocery list
Apheori (GM): Uh... sure.
How does that work?
BSG: Tree. Gravy senses it too, apparently.
The Gravedigger: Don't be silly, Radek.
You're going to die at the hands of your second-greatest invention.
Ganelon: Well if the prophecy is supposed to come true, it... doesn't.
Work, that is.
Frezak (GM): Gravy will pat Radek reassuringly.
Apheori (GM): Gravy: I need a d20.
For... reasons.
BSG: You're back, right?
Bear Soup Guy: For the moment
Frezak (GM):
rolling 1D20
(
6
)
=
6
Bear Soup Guy: I might be bothered a lot by IRL people on and off during today's session unfortunately
But I'll keep coming back
Apheori (GM): Fudge.
I NEED YOU.
Bah.
BSG: You sense a tree. Gravy mentioned it too.
Unless Gravy would go out of his way to talk to a tree?
Frezak (GM): We're here for the Airship, right?
And Radek is grumpy... and would probably want airship...
Apheori (GM): Yeah, basically. Tree just happens to be on the way.
Frezak (GM): So it's probably Airship.
Ganelon: Grumpy is pretty typical.
Bear Soup Guy: I guess Greibel walks to a tree then
Apheori (GM): Look, I need you to go to the tree. I wrote up a bunch of stuff for it like a month ago and I need to use it. BSG was supposed to get you there.
BSG: THE tree?
It's really big. At this point you can't see it, just sense it.
It's big.
Bear Soup Guy: Whatever tree you have stuff written up for
Apheori (GM): Thank you. >.<
Greibel starts walking in a slightly different direction that is only mostly the same direction as Gravy was going.
Rhu: (to Greibel) Oy!
Apheori (GM): Gravy: That's the direction of the tree.
Frezak (GM): I'll just follow Greibel.
HIs turn to lead.
This is a Democracy.
Apheori (GM): Poor Radek.
Rhu continues to follow Gravy as he starts following Greibel.
Rhu continues to follow Gravy as he starts following Greibel.
Ganelon: Don't feel bad for him.
 
He was about to destroy the world this morning to prove a point.
 
Apheori (GM): XD
EXT. Large, shaded clearing - afternoon
Okay, so the woods abruptly end at a large, shaded clearing.
 
In the middle of it is this really massive trunk, situated up on a bit of a rise in the middle of the clearing. Overhead are branches, lots and lots of branches, though from here you can't even really see how big the thing actually is.
The woods abruptly end at a large, shaded clearing. In the middle is a massive trunk, situated up on a bit of a rise in the middle of the clearing. Overhead are branches, lots and lots of branches, though from here most of them aren't really even visible.
Basically the other trees are too short to compete with this thing so they just stop in its shade.
 
The ground is mostly just rocks and crap. Thick roots jut out and over the rocks, even sticking out of the ground where it has eroded around them, forming bridges and walkways up to the trunk itself, several metres in diameter. Roots and trunk alike are covered in rough, mossy bark.
The ground is mostly just rocks and crap. Thick roots jut out and over the rocks, even sticking out of the ground where it has eroded around them, forming bridges and walkways up to the trunk itself, several metres in diameter. Roots and trunk alike are covered in rough, mossy bark.
Greibel: There's a presence within the tree, or maybe the tree is the presence. Either way, it seems quite intelligent, and it's watching you. You can go talk to it if you want.
 
Apheori (GM): It seems to be humming to itself.
There's a presence within the tree, or maybe the tree is the presence. Either way, it seems quite intelligent, and it's watching.
Gravy hears the humming too.
 
Frezak (GM): Gravy hums along and inspects the earth.
It seems to be humming to itself.
Greibel steps up to the tree
 
Apheori (GM): It's rocky and full of roots, but the dirt itself seems to be quite good. If you could just move the roots, it would be an excellent place to bury things.
The Gravedigger hums along and inspects the earth.
Greibel: HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERE'S JOHNNY!
 
HIT ME WITH YOUR BEST SHOT!
THE GRAVEDIGGER
I'VE GOT A PHD IN TREE!
This is quality soil.
Apheori (GM): The tree actually seems to recoil a bit at this.
 
Tree: AGH WHAT?
Greibel steps up to the tree.
Gaurav: Do we need to bury anything at the mo'?
 
Frezak (GM): Always be prepared!
GREIBEL
Apheori (GM): Also you can all hear the tree.
HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERE'S JOHNNY! HIT ME WITH YOUR BEST SHOT! I'VE GOT A PHD IN TREE!
Frezak (GM): If we need to bury something in a hurry, Gravy would be mortified if he didn't have a spot ready.
 
Greibel: COME ON MAN. WHAT YOU GOT? YOU WANNA GO?
The tree actually seems to recoil a bit at this.
The Gravedigger: This is quality soil.
 
Greibel: Nah, I'm just kidding.
TREE
Radek: ...
AGH WHAT?
Tree: Go what?
 
Greibel: I sensed you over back there, you seemed important. What's up?
GREIBEL
Radek: So you found a talking tree.
COME ON MAN. WHAT YOU GOT? YOU WANNA GO?
Tree: Ah, bugger man, yeah. I've been found.
 
Greibel: Yeah. That's druids, man. We find trees. Sorry about that.
TREE
Tree: Like nature, what. All prickly and massive.
Go what?
Dude.
 
Sorry?
Radek watches this, looking disappointed.
You're not sorry. If you were sorry, it'd be all bugs to me.
 
GREIBEL
Naw, I'm just kidding.
I sensed you over back there, you seemed important. What's up?
 
RADEK
So you found a talking tree.
 
TREE
Ah, bugger man, yeah. I've been found.
 
GREIBEL
Yeah. That's druids, man. We find trees. Sorry about that.
 
TREE
Dude. Sorry? You're not sorry. If you were sorry, it'd be all bugs to me. Like nature, what. All prickly and invasive.
Whatcha need?
Whatcha need?
Greibel: Uh...that's a good question. Give me a second
 
Dawn: (from a good distance away) Hi tree.
GREIBEL
Uh... that's a good question. Give me a second.
(To everyone)
Hey, guys! If we hypothetically met a giant tree spirit thing, sentient, intelligent, you know, what would we ask it for?!
 
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Does it do wishes, hypothetically?
 
DAWN
(from a good distance away)
Hi tree.
 
TREE
Yo.
 
Rhu walks around the tree, trying to figure out where the voice is coming from.
Rhu walks around the tree, trying to figure out where the voice is coming from.
Greibel: (To everyone) Hey, guys! If we hypothetically met a giant tree spirit thing, sentient, intelligent, you know, what would we ask it for?!
 
Tree: Yo.
TREE
The Gravedigger: Does it do wishes, hypothetically?
(to Rhu)
Apheori (GM): Rhu: Nature.
Oy, no poking, what.
The Gravedigger: Hello tree.
 
Rhu:
Rhu backs away.
rolling d20+10 nature check on tree
 
(
THE GRAVEDIGGER
5
Hello tree.
)
 
+10
TREE
=
15
Tree: (to Rhu) Oy no poking, what.
Hello, digger.
Hello, digger.
Gaurav: Rhu will only realise the tree is talking to it if it, like, points at him or looks at him or something.
 
Apheori (GM): The voice just booms around him.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
The Gravedigger: Digger is in the other comic. Call me Gravy.
Digger is in the other comic. Call me Gravy.
Apheori (GM): Unless he pokes it after.
 
Does he poke it after?
TREE
Gaurav: Nooo. He will respect the tree's wishes not to be poked, especially as it is much, much taller than him.
Yeah, man, Gravy.
Tree: Yeah, man, Gravy.
 
Dawn: People usually ask for stupid things.
DAWN
Things like power and truth and stuff that just makes things worse.
People usually ask for stupid things. Things like power and truth and stuff that just makes things worse. Futures.
Futures.
 
Radek: (To Greibel) Does it know anything about the holes?
RHU
Rhu: Truth! That's a great idea. We could ask it about truth.
Truth! That's a great idea. We could ask it about truth.
Greibel looks back at the tree and shrugs
 
Dawn gives Rhu a very disappointed look.
Dawn gives Rhu a very disappointed look.
Greibel: Holes? What's up with them, right?
 
Tree: Uuuugh.
RADEK
Even worse than nature, holes. Tunnel up through your roots, eating away, burning... BURNING.
(To Greibel)
AGH.
Does it know anything about the holes?
Apheori (GM): Some old leaves flutter down around you.
 
Greibel looks back at the tree and shrugs.
 
GREIBEL
Holes? What's up with them, right?
 
TREE
Uuuugh. Even worse than nature, holes. Tunnel up through your roots, eating away, burning... BURNING. AGH.
 
Some old leaves flutter down around the party. A squirrel falls out and scampers off.
 
Radek does not look impressed.
Radek does not look impressed.
Apheori (GM): And a squirrel falls out of the tree.
 
Ganelon: The animal or the other kind?
GREIBEL
Apheori (GM): Oh, the animal.
Hmmm, I hear ya, man.
Gaurav: Heh, I was just about to do a perception check for wildlife.
 
Greibel: Hmmm, I hear ya, man.
DAWN
Dawn: (to the tree) Who are you?
(to the tree)
Tree: What does it look like? I'm a treee. Been here ages, you know. Wasn't even a forest back then. Bloody elf buggers.
Who are you?
Apheori (GM): Want to ask it anything else?
 
Rhu: Have you seen an airship around here anywhere?
TREE
Frezak (GM): Dammmit, Rhu!
What does it look like? I'm a treee. Been here ages, you know. Wasn't even a forest back then. Bloody elf buggers.
I was going to ask that!
 
Tree: With or without dead folk?
RHU
Gaurav sticks his tongue out at Frezak
Have you seen an airship around here anywhere?
Gaurav: Either. We're not fussy.
 
The Gravedigger: There's several?
TREE
ANd how dead are we talking?
With or without dead folk?
Ooogly woogly walking dead?
 
Tree: They come, they go. They avoid my branches.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Gaurav: I'll brb, my browser is crapping up >.<
There's several?
Tree: The dead were moving about, if that's whatcha mean. Like little bugs. Headless and yet still sooo bothersome.
 
Radek looks up skeptically at the tree.
TREE
Radek: How do you perceive anything?
They come, they go. They avoid my branches.
Tree: I gots senses, what.
 
You're cold and feel like earth.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Gravy is warm and feels like earth.
How dead are we talking? Ooogly woogly walking dead?
How do you get along?
 
The Gravedigger: I have an endless source of jollyness.
TREE
Radek: We don't.
The dead were moving about, if that's whatcha mean. Like little bugs. Headless and yet still sooo bothersome.
 
RADEK
(looking up skeptically at the tree)
How do you perceive anything?
 
TREE
I gots senses, what. You're cold and feel like earth.
Gravy is warm and feels like earth. How do you get along?
 
THE GRAVEDIGGER
I have an endless source of jolliness.
 
RADEK
We don't.
 
'''''Ganelon''' (Radek): Those two answers are probably related.
 
TREE
Beetles, I see.
 
Dawn giggles.
Dawn giggles.
Ganelon: Those two answers are probably related.
 
The Gravedigger flutter lashes at Radek.
The Gravedigger flutters his lashes at Radek.
Apheori (GM): XD
 
The Gravedigger: You tease.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
You tease.
(he hefts his shovel)
Yeah, airship, dead people?
Yeah, airship, dead people?
Tree: Beetles, I see.
 
The Gravedigger hefts shovel.
TREE
Tree: Yeah, maaan.
Yeah, maaan.
The Gravedigger: ..
 
THE GRAVEDIGGER
This isn't a threatening gesture, I was thinking about the dead people.
This isn't a threatening gesture, I was thinking about the dead people.
Tree: They went smash.
 
Apheori (GM): Gravy: You get a sense of the direction as the tree says it, with a vague memory of an airship shape and stuff crashing into a bunch of smaller trees.
TREE
The Gravedigger: Sweet.
They went smash.
Apheori (GM): At the same time, there's a bit of a crashing in the branches above.
 
The Gravedigger: Anything we can do for you while we're here?
As the tree says this, the Gravedigger gets a vague vision of an airship shape and stuff crashing into a bunch of smaller trees.
Rhu: Are you guys, like, a species or something? We saw a giant tree next to a Hole earlier, but it seemed to be dead. Er, like two hundred years ago on the other side of this planet. Or something.
 
Apheori (GM): This time Squirrel falls out of the tree.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Frezak (GM): Back in 10 minutes.
Sweet.
Squirrel bounces up, squeealing happily, and then just runs off into the rest of the trees.
 
Apheori (GM): Radek: You're like 90% sure that didn't actually just happen.
There's a bit of a crashing in the branches above, and Squirrel falls out of the tree. She bounces up almost immediately, squealing happily, and then just runs off into the rest of the trees, rather like her namesake had done earlier.
Greibel looks on for a moment
 
Greibel: Fun girl.
Greibel watches for a moment.
Ganelon: 90% is a pretty good probability.
 
I'll go with it.
GREIBEL
Apheori (GM): Okay, I'ma answer Rhu and Gravy and then... er... do something I should have done already.
Fun girl.
Tree: (to Gravy) Naw, man, don't do it. You'll dig too far and it'll get out this time.
 
(to Rhu) Trees, man.
Radek sees it too, but is 90% sure it didn't actually happen.
Apheori (GM): Those 'man's should have been dudes.
 
And I'll be right back.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Gaurav: One of these days I need to play a D&D character who's hard of hearing. And see how long it takes my party to kill me.
(to the tree)
Bear Soup Guy: XD
Anything we can do for you while we're here?
Apheori (GM): Greibel, Gravy: The tree actually seems to be quite happy just talking to you. You get the impression it's a bit lonely.
 
But only a small bit.
TREE
Gaurav: What, with squirrels and Squirrel in its hair?
Naw, dude, don't do it. You'll dig too far and it'll get out this time.
Apheori (GM): I'm not sure those do much to help anything.
 
The Gravedigger: Hey, if you could make a platform thing with some branches, maybe Airships would stop by on their way past.
RHU
Tree: Hmmmm.
(to the tree)
Apheori (GM): There's something of a shuffling really high up.
Are you guys, like, a species or something? We saw a giant tree next to a Hole earlier, but it seemed to be dead. Er, like two hundred years ago on the other side of this planet. Or something.
Tree: Maaaaybe.
 
The Gravedigger: Just a thought. I we see living airship people we'll suggest it.
TREE
Tree: Coool, man.
Trees, man.
The Gravedigger: Everyone good to go poke around this ariship, then?
 
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Hey, if you could make a platform thing with some branches, maybe airships would stop by on their way past.
 
TREE
Hmmmm.
 
There's something of a shuffling really high up in the tree's branches.
 
TREE
Maaaaybe.
 
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Just a thought. If we see living airship people we'll suggest it.
 
TREE
Coool, man.
 
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Everyone good to go poke around this airship, then?  
(leaning in a swervy fashion toward Radek)
Raaaaadek?
Raaaaadek?
Apheori (GM): There's another crashing in the branches above. This time the tree actually seems to notice.
 
Frezak (GM): Leaning in a swervy fashion towards the grump.
Tree: Whaaaat?
Radek crosses his arms.
Radek crosses his arms.
Tree: There is a horrible WHOMP as two large figures crash into the ground at high speed, one propelled downward by the other, and taking the brunt of the impact as a result. A cloud of dirt and leaves is thrown outward.
 
Apheori (GM): Er, ooc.
Something massive crashes into the branches above, and this time the tree actually seems to notice.
Frezak (GM): Wyverns!
 
Apheori (GM): A moment later, branches shower down around everyone, especially the two figures.
TREE
Radek narrowly dodges one.
Whaaaat?
A branch, that is.
 
Ganelon: Wretched nature!
There is a horrible WHOMP as two large figures - the gods Kyrule and Djieka - crash into the ground at high speed, with one propelled downward by the other and taking the brunt of the impact as a result. A cloud of dirt and leaves is thrown outward.
Apheori (GM): Rhu, on the other hand, dodges right into a branch and gets clonked on the head.
 
Ganelon: How dare it fall on me!
A moment later, branches shower down around everyone, especially the two gods.
Tree: Man, watch it, will you?
 
Frezak (GM): I cover Radek with my shield.
Radek narrowly dodges a falling branch. The Gravedigger covers him with his shield.
Apheori (GM): This seems to be directed at the figures, not you guys.
 
Gaurav: Heeeee.
Rhu, on the other hand, dodges right into a branch and gets clonked on the head. He falls over.
Perfect. Can Rhu be knocked unconscious? How much damage?
 
Apheori (GM): 7 damage, and if you want.
TREE
Rhu points in a few random directions, including upwards, then says "Blarble!" with some gusto before falling over backwards.
(directed toward the two gods)
Frezak (GM): I'll poke Rhu to see if he's alive.
Man, watch it, will you?
Ellemerr: O_o
 
Apheori (GM): As everything stops falling down, Amadi randomly appears.
GREIBEL
Rhu seems to be fine.
Whoa. Far out.
And the two figures who just fell out of the sky are doing stuff too, apparently completely oblivious to the damage they caused.
 
Ganelon: Well, what stuff are they doing?
As everything stops falling down, Amadi randomly appears, brushing some twigs and leaves out of her hair. They are distinctly different from the leaves on any of the surrounding trees.
Amadi brushes some twigs and leaves out of her hair. They are distinctly different from the leaves this tree (or Tree, even) has got.
 
Apheori (GM): Moment.
The Gravedigger goes to check on Rhu.
Rhu opens his eyes, but chooses to remain on the ground until the world stops spinning.
 
Gaurav: This is clearly not a good place to be flying around. Airships, large figures, everything's falling out of the sky these days.
Rhu seems to be fine, though he just lies there for the time being.
Apheori (GM): Oh gods this is tacky.
 
The top figure, a masked woman dressed all in grey, gets up slowly, her foot rather firmly planted on the other's chest.
Amadi suddenly notices who one of the gods is and tries to look inconspicuous behind the Gravedigger. Dawn joins her.
The other one just looks ridiculous. It's got gleaming bits sticking out all over, and geometric holes through it in odd locations, and entirely too many limbs, and too much colour. Some parts are like windows into the cosmos, revealing starfields and more, while others are just unreal. It's all a bit beat up at this point, however, full of twigs and covered in dirt, and leaves, and a bit of what might be blood.
 
Ridiculous-looking figure: You can't do this.
The god on top, Kyrule, is a masked woman dressed all in grey, a full meter taller than the Gravedigger. She gets up slowly, her foot rather firmly planted on the other's chest, seemingly oblivious to the damage she has caused around her.
Grey figure: I have made my position known, and I have sued for peace, and still you have persisted. Relent. End your futile struggle. Relent.
 
Apheori (GM): Any interest in interrupting this?
The other one, Djieka, just looks ridiculous. He has gleaming bits sticking out all over, and geometric holes through his form in odd locations, and entirely too many limbs, and too much colour. Some parts are like windows into the cosmos, revealing starfields and more, while others are just unreal. He is all a bit beat up at this point, however, full of twigs and covered in dirt, and leaves, and a bit of what might be blood.
Frezak (GM): Nope.
 
(From Ellemerr): Do I know any of 'em?
DJIEKA
Frezak (GM): Well, Gravy will wander up and loom in an interested fashion.
You can't do this.
Gaurav: Nope.
 
Ganelon: Sounds like that might even be illegal.
KYRULE
Frezak (GM): In that Gravy is unable to not loom.
I have made my position known, and I have sued for peace, and still you have persisted. Relent. End your futile struggle. Relent.
Ganelon: I'd like to try to uh... identify the ridiculous one?
 
Gaurav: How large are these large figures?
'''''Apheori (GM)''': Any interest in interrupting this?
(To Ellemerr): The top one is Kyrule, god of death, and the bottom on is Djieka, god of chaos and luck.
'''''Ganelon''' (Radek): I'd like to try to uh... identify the ridiculous one? What the hell is it?
Ganelon: What the hell is it?
'''''Apheori (GM)''': You're reasonably sure it's some kind of god. Nothing else would be that... '''''excessive.
Amadi tries to look inconspicuous somewhere behind Gravy.
'''''Ganelon''' (Radek): And it's gettin' beat up?
Apheori (GM): They're a bit bigger than Gravy. The grey one might be about meter taller, and the other one... er... is a bit too ridiculous to tell.
'''''Apheori (GM)''': Yup.
How do you identify things in D&D?
'''''Ganelon''' (Radek): Then hell no he's not interrupting.
Ganelon: Skills, but if this isn't something that would be documented, either as a species or phenomenon or legend, etc, then you can just say it's not possible to know what it is.
 
Gaurav: Greibel identified the women-made-of-weasels (?) before any of us did; we could get him to look at these peeps and see what he says.
The Gravedigger wanders up and looms in an interested fashion.
Rhu can check for any religious angle on these peeps if that seems useful.
 
Ganelon: ...And hope it's not something like "Whoa. Far Out."?
DJIEKA
Gaurav: And there's always Gravyvision.
I will not relent! Not to you!
Hahaha.
 
Apheori (GM): BSG: You around?
KYRULE
Gaurav: "Oh my god, it's full of stars!"
(looking down on Djieka in utter disappointment)
Apheori (GM): Radek: You're reasonably sure it's some kind of god.
You fool.
Nothing else would be that... excessive.
 
Ganelon: And it's gettin' beat up?
She kneels down on top of him, and he tries to pull away, but he's pinned, half-buried already from the force of the impact, and held down, for she is far bigger, far more real, pressing him to the earth.
Apheori (GM): Yup.
 
Ganelon: Then hell no he's not interrupting.
She curls her fingers on his chest.
Gaurav: Oh huh.
 
Tell Rhu that so he can religion check it or something.
KYRULE
Ridiculous-looking figure: I will not relent! Not to you!
(in a half-whisper)
Apheori (GM): The grey one looks down on him in utter disappointment.
One last chance. Relent.
Grey figure: You fool.
 
Ganelon: I shouldn't need to. If religion as a skill would allow you to know what god this is, your character doesn't need outside knowledge to think it's a god.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Because succeeding on the skill means Rhu would recognize it on his own.
'scuse me. You guys gods?
Apheori (GM): She kneels down on top of him, and he tries to pull away, but he's pinned, half-buried already from the force of the impact, and held down, for she is far bigger, far more real, pressing him to the earth.
 
She curls her fingers on his chest, and half-whispers:
Amadi whimpers a little from behind the Gravedigger.
Grey figure: One last chance. Relent.
 
The Gravedigger: 'scuse me.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
You guys gods?
Because I had some questions.
Amadi whimpers a little from behind Gravy.
 
The Gravedigger: Because I had some questions.
Kyrule looks up slowly and holds up a finger in Gravy's direction.
Apheori (GM): She looks up slowly and holds up a finger in Gravy's direction.
 
Grey figure: A moment, please.
KYRULE
The Gravedigger: Okay.
A moment, please.
Apheori (GM): And Rhu, go ahead and religion them if you want.
 
Rhu gets up and, dusting himself off, walks towards Gravy.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Rhu:
Okay.
rolling d20+10 religion check against the gods
 
(
Kyrule turns her full attention back on Djieka.
7
 
)
KYRULE
+10
Relent!
=
 
17
Djieka doesn't answer.
Apheori (GM) almost falls out of her chair laughing.
 
Apheori (GM): Grey one is probably Kyrule. You have no idea about the other one, probably never even heard of it.
Rhu gets up and walks towards the Gravedigger, dusting himself off.
Rhu: (to everybody) I think the grey one is Kyrule. Hazz' said he might know about the Holes or something. (to Amadi) And you've talked about him from time to ... you okay? Why are you whimpering?
 
Ellemerr: brb
RHU
Amadi makes sushing motions and pretends she's not there.
I think the grey one is Kyrule. Hazz' said he might know about the Holes or something.
Apheori (GM): Meanwhile Kyrule turns her full attention back on the other one and demands that he relent again.
(to Amadi)
He doesn't answer.
And you've talked about him from time to... you okay? Why are you whimpering?
Ganelon: Hazz wanted you to beat Kyrule over the head at one point, apparently.
 
This might be an excellent, or terrible, opportunity to do that.
Amadi makes shushing motions and pretends she's not there.
Ellemerr: Yep. Probably a bit of both.
 
Apheori (GM) giggles.
DAWN
Gaurav: Not while she's busy crushing another god into the ground, I don't think. I'll wait until after she speaks with Gravy.
(to Rhu)
God to god.
We're not here, okay? Not here.
Dawn: (to Rhu) We're not here, okay? Not here.
 
Apheori (GM): Dawn is also hiding behind Gravy.
KYRULE
Frezak (GM): Might not be the best place given that he's right next to these people.
(to Djieka)
Apheori (GM): Yeah, well, he's big.
Then I shall have your heart. All of your joy, your hope, your worth, everything that makes you who and what you are, will be taken. Even your light. And your life.
Ellemerr: But he's so nice and - yeah, that.
 
Gaurav: There is a giant tree to hide behind or climb up if they like.
DJIEKA
Apheori (GM): Let's just say these two didn't get away when they had the chance the last time; I don't see them likely being any more sensible this time.
No!
Ellemerr: Might be more of these up there. Gravy's familiar and safe.
 
Apheori (GM): Though maybe they are.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
He is.
That sounds pretty mean. Are you the bad guy? I'm only asking because I might have to interrupt.
Kyrule: (to the guy) Then I shall have your heart. All of your joy, your hope, your worth, everything that makes you who and what you are, will be taken. Even your light. And your life.
 
Ridiculous-looking figure: No!
Kyrule ignores the Gravedigger's question and draws a strange, brilliant light out of Djieka's chest, and it forms a bit of a ball in her hand. As she does so, he almost seems to come up with it, fighting, trying to get it back, until she pulls it too far away and he falls back, not moving, his colour faded, his reality... lessened.
The Gravedigger: That sounds pretty mean.
 
Are you the bad guy?
But not gone.
I'm only asking because I might have to interrupt.
 
Apheori (GM): She ignores Gravy and draws a strange, brilliant light out of the ridiculous-looking one's chest and it forms a bit of a ball in her hand. As she does so, he almost seems to come up with it, fighting, trying to get it back, until she pulls it too far away and he falls back, not moving, his colour faded, his reality... lessened.
KYRULE
Gaurav: That sounds ... extreme.
And you will have nothing.
Kyrule: And you will have nothing.
 
Amadi tries to really not be there.
Amadi tries to really not be there.
The Gravedigger: I'm gonna be honest. You don't seem like a very nice entity.
 
Dawn clings to Amadi.
Dawn clings to Amadi.
Kyrule: I'm not.
 
The Gravedigger shrugs.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
The Gravedigger: At least you're honest about it.
I'm gonna be honest. You don't seem like a very nice entity.
 
KYRULE
(tilting her head ever so slightly toward the Gravedigger)
I'm not.
 
Kyrule takes the light, now cupping it in both hands, and presses it to her own chest, and it disappears.
 
THE GRAVEDIGGER
(he shrugs)
At least you're honest about it.
 
Kyrule rises slowly, focusing on nothing in particular, before finally turning toward the Gravedigger entirely.
 
The Gravedigger waves.
 
THE GRAVEDIGGER
So what was that all about, then?
So what was that all about, then?
Kyrule takes the light, now cupping it in both hands, and presses it to her own chest, and it disappears.
 
Kyrule rises slowly, focusing on nothing in particular, before finally turning to Gravy.
KYRULE
The Gravedigger: Me waves.
He thought to oppose me, blind to the consequences, the devastation that an all-out war would cause. Most of the gods understood, but only most.
Frezak (GM): oops
For those who would not relent, I could only show them that there will be other consequences, more personal, more close to home. Fools.
The Gravedigger waves
 
Kyrule: He thought to oppose me, blind to the consequences, the devastation that an all out war would cause. Most of the gods understood, but only most.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
For those who would not relent, I could only show them that there will be other consequences, more personal, more close to home.
You sound like the grump. No offense, grump.
Fools.
 
The Gravedigger: You sound like the grump.
RADEK
Radek: Don't you think that there are greater concerns at the moment than punishing dissidents?
Don't you think that there are greater concerns at the moment than punishing dissidents? Or is the unraveling of the dimensions somehow beneath you?
The Gravedigger: No offense, grump.
 
Radek: Or is the unraveling of the dimensions somehow beneath you?
THE GRAVEDIGGER
The Gravedigger whispers to Radek. "You mean that morally rather than spatially, right?"
(whispering to Radek)
Kyrule: Always. Which is why their dissidence could not be allowed to continue.
You mean that morally rather than spatially, right?
Kyrule walks around Gravedigger and peers behind him at the midgets.
 
RADEK
I do not.
 
KYRULE
Always. Which is why their dissidence could not be allowed to continue.
 
Kyrule walks around Gravedigger and tries to peer behind him at the midgets.
 
The Gravedigger rotates to hide the midgets.
The Gravedigger rotates to hide the midgets.
Ellemerr: The midgets rotate with him, of course.
 
Frezak (GM): The midgets that are probably peering around him.
The midgets rotate with him.
Apheori (GM): She's too tall to actually stop her, unless you... I don't even know.
 
Frezak (GM): I lean backwards.
Kyrule tries to peer over the Gravedigger instead.
Ellemerr: xD
 
Apheori (GM): Okay.
The Gravedigger leans over backwards.
Ganelon: Flawless.
 
Frezak (GM): SO they can hide under and behind.
Kyrule leans over with him, curving like a noodle.
Apheori (GM): She leans over too.
 
Gaurav: Hee.
Gravy gives her a friendly beam to bluff that it's just coincidental that he felt like pivoting and bending backwards.
Frezak (GM): Unless she curves like a noodle, they should be shielded.
 
Rhu: Um, excuse me, Your ... Godliness. My god Hazz'ridan the All-End asked me to speak with you.
Apheori (GM): Yeah, pretty much.
She stops and then back away a bit.
Dawn leans out and makes shooing gestures with her hands.
Dawn leans out and makes shooing gestures with her hands.
Ellemerr: Lemme know when/if Amadi is spotted so thoroughly that there's no further point in hiding.
 
Frezak (GM): Gravy gives her a friendly beam to bluff that it's just coincidental that he felt like pivoting and bending backwards.
RHU
Apheori (GM): Oh blimey.
(interrupting the peculiar display of noodliness)
Rhu: He thought you might be able to help with these ... Holes? Big creepy crack in reality spewing zombies?
Um, excuse me, Your... Godliness. My god Hazz'ridan the All-End asked me to speak with you.
The Gravedigger: Zombies!
 
Shadow stuff.
Kyrule stops and then backs away a bit.
Also a beach, I think.
 
Ganelon: I missed my chance to actually add this at the right time, but Radek would answer Gravy's question.
RHU
Rhu: Yes! That too.
He thought you might be able to help with these... Holes? Big creepy crack in reality spewing zombies?
Ganelon: "I do not."
 
Frezak (GM): You could pretend you spent all that time thinking about.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Gravitas.
Zombies! Shadow stuff. Also a beach, I think.
Apheori (GM): Agh, crap, did I even write this part? It was a huge-arse part. >.<
 
Ganelon: No, he'd be pretty quick to deny caring about the moral decay of the universe.
RHU
Kyrule: And your Hazz'ridan could not even bring this up himself, not now, not in the beginning, not ever?
Yes! That too.
 
KYRULE
And your Hazz'ridan could not even bring this up himself, not now, not in the beginning, not ever?
He is not one you should be following, certainly not regarding this.
He is not one you should be following, certainly not regarding this.
Gaurav: If Rhu has Kyrule's attention now, he'll step around her so that her back is towards Gravy and the midgets.
 
Radek mutters to Gravy.
RADEK
Radek: ...Do you think he'll finally listen now that a god's said it?
(muttering to Gravy)
The Gravedigger: No.
...Do you think he'll finally listen now that a god's said it?
Religious people don't listen.
 
That's how they manage to keep it up.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Apheori (GM): She doesn't bother to keep facing Rhu, and smiles slightly at what Gravy said.
No. Religious people don't listen. That's how they manage to keep it up.
Rhu: He can't help us as much as he'd like. We need to fix these Holes ourself.
 
Apheori (GM): You aren't wrong. The Rifts need to be closed.
Kyrule smiles slightly under her mask.
Unfortunately, where he won't act because the rifts serve his interests, I cannot act.
 
Tree said that.
RHU
Tree: AGH.
He can't help us as much as he'd like. We need to fix these Holes ourself.
Ellemerr: xD
 
Apheori (GM): THAT WAS KYRULE.
KYRULE
Rhu: His interests?
You aren't wrong. The Rifts need to be closed. Unfortunately, where he won't act because the rifts serve his interests, I cannot act.
Apheori (GM): NOT THE TREE.
 
NOT HEM.
ME.
Ellemerr: It's a tough world, dear.
Apheori (GM): >.>
Yes.
The Gravedigger: Hey, Tree? What do you think of this ladypersonthing?
Rhu: Anyway, yes, we are attempting to close the Holes. We closed one just a few days ago, but then our shadows came to life and tried to kill us and stuff.
Well, he did. (points towards Radek)
Apheori (GM): Agh, I can't even keep up with this.
Is this what you do in real conversations, keep piling stuff on so people can't respond to any one of the things? >.>
Radek just rolls his eyes at Kyrule's statement. In a "of course you can't", sort of way.
Radek just rolls his eyes at Kyrule's statement. In a "of course you can't", sort of way.
Ganelon: Nah, this happens a lot.
 
Frezak (GM): Yes.
RHU
Ganelon: In online TTRPG conversations.
His interests?
Apheori (GM): Heh. >.<
Anyway, yes, we are attempting to close the Holes. We closed one just a few days ago, but then our shadows came to life and tried to kill us and stuff.
Ganelon: Generally I just try to maintain the etiquette to not type when I can see someone else is (who is in the same conversation as my character).
(he points towards Radek)
Note that when you're doing /me, however, it shows up as you (the player) typing to others.
Well, he did.
It used to not show up at all, which caused all kinds of confusion.
 
Now it just causes diminished amounts of confusion.
KYRULE
Apheori (GM): Okay, I'm just going to ignore everything Rhu said after the first bit.
His goal is to spread, through whatever means possible. He is as a plague upon the named realms, spreading through and beyond, and where rifts in the fabric of the realms arise, he uses and propagates them further.
He didn't actually say that.
 
Bad Gaurav.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Frezak (GM): O.o
Hey, Tree? What do you think of this ladypersonthing?
Apheori (GM): Becuase he'd wait, presumeably.
 
Gaurav: Sure.
TREE
Apheori (GM): OKAY.
(to Gravy)
Kyrule: His goal is to spread, through whatever means possible. He is as a plague upon the named realms, spreading through and beyond, and where rifts in the fabric of the realms arise, he uses and propagates them further.
Seems a little different from before, but she's all good, man.
Tree: (to Gravy) Seems a little different from before, but she's all good, man.
Done something with her hair.
Done something with her hair.
The Gravedigger: Sweet. Thanks, tree.
 
Kyrule: (to the tree) Hey Vivek.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Tree: Hey yourself. What's up, man?
Sweet. Thanks, tree.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: Continue your conversation or get back to the point. >.>
 
Gaurav: Hee, thanks!
KYRULE
Kyrule: Oh, you know how it is. You die horribly, you put on a new face, you wonder where it all went wrong...
(to the tree)
Tree: Oh, no, no idea what you're talking about. No idea at all.
Hey Vivek.
Rhu: We're trying to close those rifts. I think he's mostly supportive of this goal.
 
TREE
Hey yourself. What's up, man?
 
KYRULE
Oh, you know how it is. You die horribly, you put on a new face, you wonder where it all went wrong...
 
TREE
Oh, no, no idea what you're talking about. No idea at all.
 
RHU
We're trying to close those rifts. I think he's mostly supportive of this goal.
Assuming those Holes are also rifts, I guess. I don't know if I actually know what we're doing.
Assuming those Holes are also rifts, I guess. I don't know if I actually know what we're doing.
Kyrule: Perhaps.
 
Rhu: Are there others out there, trying to close the Holes?
KYRULE
Apheori (GM): She ignores Rhu and looks around for anyone smarter.
Perhaps.
Radek: None. They're too busy dismissing my theories.
 
Radek gives Gravy a sharp glare.
RHU
Ganelon: Uh oh.
Are there others out there, trying to close the Holes?
I was just trying to be snappy but now I've just drawn attention to myself, haven't I?
 
Apheori (GM): Dun dun dun.
Kyrule ignores Rhu and looks around for anyone smarter.
I'll be right back.
 
I'm really bad at this, I'm sorry.
RADEK
Ganelon: Quoth the tree: "It's cool, dude."
None. They're too busy dismissing my theories.
Apheori (GM): Eh, Kyrule should have just ignored Rhu from the start. It would have avoided so many problems.
 
Ganelon: Poor Rhu.
Radek gives the Gravedigger a sharp glare.
Apheori (GM): Rhu: Feel free to continue to do whatever. Even if she ignores you, your party members needn't and all that.
 
Gaurav: Will do!
'''''Ganelon''' (Radek): Uh oh. I was just trying to be snappy but now I've just drawn attention to myself, haven't I?
Kyrule: (to Radek) Your theories are largely correct, but unfortunately the rifts and thinnies are but small symptoms of the overall problem.
 
Radek: I wasn't waiting for your validation, but by all means, continue.
KYRULE
Ganelon: That's uh... for the record, not him being smug or anything.
(to Radek)
Rather, he's not so disdainful of the divine that he'll outright sabotage his own efforts to gather information.
Your theories are largely correct, but unfortunately the rifts and thinnies are but small symptoms of the overall problem.
Kyrule: The universe grows thin. It is old and tired, and all the fighting of the worlds simply weakens it further.
 
Radek: ...
RADEK
The Gravedigger: That's cheery.
I wasn't waiting for your validation, but by all means, continue.
Ganelon: She's saying that the expansion of the universe is fucking everything up?
 
I have to IMPLODE THE UNIVERSE to fix this?
KYRULE
Apheori (GM): I think she's saying it's idiots with magic that's doing it.
The universe grows thin. It is old and tired, and all the fighting of the worlds simply weakens it further.
Ganelon: Oh.
 
Apheori (GM): But that doesn't mean your conclusion was necessarily wrong.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Apheori (GM) grins.
That's cheery.
Gaurav: Destroy the universe to save it. It's the only way.
 
Apheori (GM): Your companion wasn't wrong. I should be fixing this.
'''''Ganelon''' (Radek): She's saying that the expansion of the universe is fucking everything up? I have to IMPLODE THE UNIVERSE to fix this?
But Kyrule as Kyrule does not know how. He was not given that knowledge when he was named, for to do so would only have broken his mind. He must learn on his own, and that is no easy task. I've only seen it done once before, and it took many tries before that succeeded, and great cost.
 
Kyrule: Your companion wasn't wrong. I should be fixing this.
KYRULE
But Kyrule as Kyrule does not know how. He was not given that knowledge when he was named, for to do so would only have broken his mind. He must learn on his own, and that is no easy task. I've only seen it done once before, and it took many tries before that succeeded, and great cost.
Your companion wasn't wrong. I should be fixing this. But Kyrule as Kyrule does not know how. He was not given that knowledge when he was named, for to do so would only have broken his mind.
Kyrule grumps.
He must learn on his own, and that is no easy task. I've only seen it done once before, and it took many tries before that succeeded, and great cost.
Apheori (GM): Dammit.
 
YOU KNOW WHAT I MEANT.
RHU
The Gravedigger: Soooo.... Dimensional spackle won't cut it?
Might... Hazz'ridan have that knowledge?
Rhu: (to Kyrule) Might ... Hazz'ridan have that knowledge?
 
Radek: You'll need to forgive me for refusing to wait patiently for Kyrule to come upon a solution without assistance.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
To affect change on this scale seems to be impossible, however. I am outnumbered astronomically by the presence of counter-productive fools.
Soooo... Dimensional spackle won't cut it?
Kyrule: (to Radek) Good. Just please, as with this morning, try to restrain yourself when things go ill - the more damage is done, the worse the overall situation will become.
 
Those fools need not incite you to become equally foolish.
RADEK
The Gravedigger: Seeeee?
You'll need to forgive me for refusing to wait patiently for Kyrule to come upon a solution without assistance. To affect change on this scale seems to be impossible, however. I am outnumbered astronomically by the presence of counter-productive fools.
Apheori (GM): I want Greibel.
 
The Gravedigger: I told you it was a bad idea to shatter the universe!
KYRULE
Apheori (GM): Hmph.
(to Radek)
Bear Soup Guy: huh?
Please, as with this morning, try to restrain yourself when things go ill - the more damage is done, the worse the overall situation will become. Those fools need not incite you to become equally foolish.
Apheori (GM): Hi.
 
Your party members are talking to another god.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Anything to chime in?
Seeeee? I told you it was a bad idea to shatter the universe!
Radek: Hmph.
 
Bear Soup Guy: I haven't got the foggiest understanding of any of this
RADEK
Radek: It could have served to persuade him.
Hmph. It could have served to persuade him.
Bear Soup Guy: So I doubt Greibel has either :P
 
Apheori (GM): Fine, then ask her about petunias or something.
GREIBEL
Greibel: HEY LADY!
HEY LADY! HEY! HEY! HEY LADY! HEY NICE LADY!
HEY! HEY! HEY LADY! HEY NICE LADY!
 
Greibel jumps up and down pointing at himself
Greibel jumps up and down pointing at himself.
Greibel: WOOP WOOP!
 
Kyrule: Um... yes?
GREIBEL
Greibel: What is your favorite salad?
WOOP WOOP!
 
KYRULE
Um... yes?
 
GREIBEL
What is your favorite salad?
 
Kyrule takes off her mask and gives Greibel a long look.
Kyrule takes off her mask and gives Greibel a long look.
Greibel strikes a pose
 
Ellemerr: xD
Greibel strikes a pose, rather like a fashion model.
Ganelon: Like a superhero pose? A fashion model pose?
 
A... Michael Jackson pose?
KYRULE
Greibel: Sort of a mock-handsome-model pose
Caesar salad, I suppose.
Oh right the fashion model one
 
Bear Soup Guy: err
GREIBEL
OOC
Oooooooo, excellent choice. Mine's POTATO SALAD! BOINK!
Gaurav: What sort of mask is Kyrule wearing? What does she look like without it?
 
Kyrule: Caesar salad, I suppose.
Greibel throws a potato at Kyrule.
Greibel: Oooooooo, excellent choice.
 
Mine's POTATO SALAD! BOINK!
Greibel throws a potato at Kyrule
Apheori (GM): That mask from the wiki, except in mirrored silver, and without it she looks... uh, like someone not wearing a mask.
Fairly normal, kind of pretty?
Kyrule catches the potato and then looks at it like it's a bit unusual.
Kyrule catches the potato and then looks at it like it's a bit unusual.
Greibel grins knowingly
 
Bear Soup Guy: This is all part of his plan that he hasn't thought of yet
Greibel grins knowingly.
And he probably never will
 
Frezak (GM): That's the best kind of plan!
RADEK
Radek: ...As I said, counter-productive fools.
...As I said, counter-productive fools.
Ganelon: Personally I approve wholeheartedly of Greibel's cunning sceme.
 
SCHEME
'''''Bear Soup Guy''' (Greibel): This is all part of his plan that he hasn't thought of yet. And he probably never will.
Ugh.
 
Kyrule approves too. Silently. Invisibly.
'''''Ganelon''' (Radek): Personally I approve wholeheartedly of Greibel's cunning scheme.
Amadi loves the scheme and would normally help, but is still in hiding.
 
Rhu: (to Kyrule, knowing full well that she'll ignore him) Can you help us with any of this? I think we're looking for Holes to experiment on, or other ... smart people who can help.
RHU
Apheori (GM): Amadi: She probably saw you, but just pretended not to.
(to Kyrule, knowing full well that she'll ignore him)
Radek: That would be useful, yes.
Can you help us with any of this? I think we're looking for Holes to experiment on, or other... smart people who can help.
Amadi is fine with the continued pretension.
 
Radek: If... hrm.
RADEK
Ganelon: He's just gonna start thinking to himself.
That would be useful, yes. If... hrm.
Reversing the expansion of the universe requires a lot of power! Probably more than he can bring to bear.
 
Kyrule: (to Radek) Your research has made consiserable strides already. The question is, what do you intend to do with it?
KYRULE
Ganelon: But then I remembered, we have a not-shovel of immense power.
(to Radek)
Apheori (GM): You actually have it?
Your research has made considerable strides already. The question is, what do you intend to do with it?
Frezak (GM): UH-HUH
 
Apheori (GM): Oh blimey.
RADEK
Ganelon: Okay, KNOWLEDGE OF one.
What else? I have to correct this monumental blunder before it's too late.
Frezak (GM): In our grasp.
 
Metaphorically.
KYRULE
Ganelon: It might be worth looking into getting it in our grasp literally.
All of it? Everything?
Frezak (GM): Yesssssss
Radek: What else? I have to correct this monumental blunder before it's too late.
Kyrule: All of it? Everything?
Do you intend to fix everything, every hole, every tear, every thin spot in the entirety of the fabric of the universe? And when the one is finished, what of the others? Will you move on, universe to universe, until all of the multiverse is solid and absolute, no more holes, no more uncertainty, no more variance in the possibilities that face those within? What then, when you are unto, nay, beyond a god yourself? What will you do but continue as you always have, without reason, only a purpose that has outlived any need? Is this what you want?
Do you intend to fix everything, every hole, every tear, every thin spot in the entirety of the fabric of the universe? And when the one is finished, what of the others? Will you move on, universe to universe, until all of the multiverse is solid and absolute, no more holes, no more uncertainty, no more variance in the possibilities that face those within? What then, when you are unto, nay, beyond a god yourself? What will you do but continue as you always have, without reason, only a purpose that has outlived any need? Is this what you want?
When do you stop?
When do you stop?
The Gravedigger: If you're going to do a job, you do it right.
 
Or until you're tired and feel like a nap.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Ganelon: Just a sec.
If you're going to do a job, you do it right. Or until you're tired and feel like a nap.
Kyrule: That works with burying things. Not so much with purpose, or reason.
 
Have you ever buried a god?
KYRULE
The Gravedigger: Not yet!
That works with burying things. Not so much with purpose, or reason. Have you ever buried a god?
That I know of.
 
I did a dragon the other day.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Radek: ...Why should I stop?
Not yet! That I know of. I did a dragon the other day.
The Gravedigger: Because if you remove all variance in the world it would be sad and boring, you boob.
 
Apheori (GM): I love Gravy.
RADEK
Radek: The nature of progress is infinite. I can always find a direction to advance in - even the search itself is progress.
...Why should I stop?
I will never need to stop.
 
Apheori (GM): Gods don't stay buried. That makes it work, because for something that big to simply stay put indefinitely would take a piece of the world away, removed, nonexistent.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Kyrule: Gods don't stay buried. That makes it work, because for something that big to simply stay put indefinitely would take a piece of the world away, removed, nonexistent.
Because if you remove all variance in the world it would be sad and boring, you boob.
 
RADEK
The nature of progress is infinite. I can always find a direction to advance in - even the search itself is progress. I will never need to stop.
 
KYRULE
Gods don't stay buried. That makes it work, because for something that big to simply stay put indefinitely would take a piece of the world away, removed, nonexistent.
Progress shouldn't stay buried either, but if you close it up, remove the opportunities, it loses its potential. It is no longer infinite.
Progress shouldn't stay buried either, but if you close it up, remove the opportunities, it loses its potential. It is no longer infinite.
Tree: Just don't go burying anything in my roots, 'kay?
 
The Gravedigger: No probs, Tree.
TREE
Apheori (GM): Also I should point out that there is a god corpse on the ground behind Kyrule. Probably in need of burial.
Just don't go burying anything in my roots, 'kay?
 
THE GRAVEDIGGER
No probs, Tree.
 
Radek waves his hand dismissively.
Radek waves his hand dismissively.
Radek: If I can reverse the expansion of the universe, I can encourage it as well. The flaws that have led to this catastrophe may yet be corrected.
 
Ganelon: If he ever achieves so much power that he can do this, why not just fix the universe so it can be all diverse and yet not get holes torn all over it in the process?
RADEK
Kyrule: To find that balance is a hard problem, and why we are in this situation in the first place.
If I can reverse the expansion of the universe, I can encourage it as well. The flaws that have led to this catastrophe may yet be corrected.
 
KYRULE
To find that balance is a hard problem, and why we are in this situation in the first place.
How do you know you will know when to reverse the process back, when you cannot see it with an absolute eye?
How do you know you will know when to reverse the process back, when you cannot see it with an absolute eye?
Apheori (GM): Heeee.
 
Ask her that. >.>
Amadi makes a disdainful snort from behind Gravy, forgetting for a moment that she's being not there.
Amadi makes a disdainful snort from behind Gravy, forgetting for a moment that she's "not there".
 
Gaurav: Now I want an absolute eye.
'''''Gaurav''' (Rhu): Now I want an absolute eye.
Ellemerr: Here, take mine. It's been creeping me out anyway.
 
'''''Ellemerr''' (Amadi): Here, take mine. It's been creeping me out anyway.
 
Kyrule tries walking around Gravy again, this time going the other direction.
Kyrule tries walking around Gravy again, this time going the other direction.
The Gravedigger pivots amiably.
The Gravedigger pivots amiably.
Kyrule: You still dig holes, yes?
 
Gaurav takes Ellemerr's absolute eye and adds it to his inventory.
KYRULE
Gaurav: Thanks, Ellemerr!
(leaning over him awkwardly)
Ellemerr: You're welcome, I guess.
You still dig holes, yes?
The Gravedigger: Yep.
 
Tree: Dude, not in my roots you don't.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
The Gravedigger: 's cool, Tree. Chill out.
Yep.
Kyrule: Bury things?
 
Tree: As long as it's not in my roots.
TREE
The Gravedigger: Yep.
Dude, not in my roots you don't.
Kyrule: (indicating the dead ridiculous guy) Would you like to bury a god?
 
Ganelon: WOULD I!?
THE GRAVEDIGGER
's cool, Tree. Chill out.
 
KYRULE
Bury things?
 
TREE
As long as it's not in my roots.
 
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Yep.
 
KYRULE
(indicating the nearby god corpse)
Would you like to bury a god?
 
The Gravedigger is silent for a while.
The Gravedigger is silent for a while.
The Gravedigger stares at the dirt and the stars.
The Gravedigger stares at the dirt and the stars.
The Gravedigger: Yes.
 
THE GRAVEDIGGER
(finally)
Yes.
But first I must hide my mmm-----aaaarigolds?
But first I must hide my mmm-----aaaarigolds?
Gaurav: Hee.
 
Kyrule: Just as long as it's not petunias. I don't think we could take it if it were petunias.
KYRULE
Ellemerr: brb
Just as long as it's not petunias. I don't think we could take it if it were petunias.
(To Ellemerr): This is relevant because the last thing she said before he killed her was "I'm turning into a bowl of petunias."
 
The Gravedigger starts shuffling backwards slowly.
The Gravedigger starts shuffling backwards slowly.
(To Ellemerr): You're a bowl of petunias. Or a petunia. Or something.
 
Radek: ...What's wrong with him?
RADEK
...What's wrong with him?
 
Kyrule tries to keep a straight face.
Kyrule tries to keep a straight face.
Kyrule: He needs to hide his... marigolds. From me. For reasons.
 
KYRULE
He needs to hide his... marigolds. From me. For reasons.
(yelling after Gravy)
I can see right through you, you know!
I can see right through you, you know!
Frezak (GM): I want to get to the treeline that I may hide my... flowers.
 
Apheori (GM): I don't think anyone stops you.
RHU
Frezak (GM): Hide behind a tree and shout "JUST PUTTING AWAY MY... UH... FLOWERS. YES SIRREE."
Why petunias? Why not petunias?
Rhu: Why petunias? Why not petunias?
 
rolling d20+10 religion check significance of petunias
The Gravedigger scoots back behind the treeline and hides his... flowers behind a tree.
(
 
8
THE GRAVEDIGGER
)
(yelling around the tree)
+10
JUST PUTTING AWAY MY... UH... FLOWERS. YES SIRREE.
=
 
18
The Gravedigger returns a bit later, midget-free, and considers the god corpse.
Apheori (GM): You have no idea.
 
The Gravedigger: Okay, tree, where's a good place for me to bury this here god?
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Tree: Hmmmmm.
Okay, tree, where's a good place for me to bury this here god?
How about...
 
Tree shuffles a bunch of roots around, finally making a space for a grave a bit off to the side.
TREE
Tree: Here.
Hmmmmm. How about...
The Gravedigger: Great.
 
The Gravedigger pulls up imaginary sleeves.
The tree shuffles a bunch of roots around, finally making a space for a grave a bit off to the side.
The Gravedigger: Let's do this!
 
Frezak (GM): And hums the tree song.
TREE
Apheori (GM): Gravy digs a hole and stuff. Anyone else doing anything? Is Ellemerr back yet?
Here?
Ellemerr: I am now!
 
(From Ellemerr): And that's awesome. xD
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Ganelon: Radek's just going to think about how he could possibly experiment on these things under controlled circumstances.
Great.
(To Ellemerr): It's particularly funny because the real Kyrule didn't even get the reference.
(he pulls up imaginary sleeves)
Ganelon: You know, rather than just winging it and hoping it works on the entire universe.
Let's do this!
Like "hmm... perhaps I could first create a miniverse..."
 
Gaurav: Given that we are looking for the airship to get out of the Dorgin area, we could ask Kyrule to transport us somewhere or something. If we have somewhere we want to go. Maybe back to Coffle?
The Gravedigger gets to digging, humming the tree song.
(To Ellemerr): Whereas this one did and then some.
 
Ganelon: We just came from Coffle, though.
While Gravy's digging and the midgets are stowed, Kyrule seems to address Radek. For some reason she's looking at Greibel, however.
Why go back?
 
Gaurav: There's a Hole near it to experiment on.
KYRULE
Apheori (GM): While Gravy's digging and the midgets are stowed, Kyrule seems to address Radek. For some reason she's looking at Greibel, however.
Your process for closing the rifts. Would you be willing to give a demonstration?
Gaurav: And wizards, and a doorway to Arah, and all the town guards you could ever want.
 
(From Ellemerr): Awesome. Yuss.
Greibel is making faces. Stretching the skin out on the sides of his face with his hands. Pulling the porridge over his face like a beekeeper's mask.
Kyrule: Your process for closing the rifts. Would you be willing to give a demonstration?
 
Apheori (GM): Is Greibel doing anything weird?
Gaurav: Almost certainly.
Bear Soup Guy: ^
Making faces.
Gaurav: Ha!
Bear Soup Guy: Stretching the skin out on the sides of his face with his hands.
Pulling the porridge over his face like a beekeeper's mask
Apheori (GM): Okay, this explains a thing or two.
Radek: Of course.
Radek is looking at Greibel too, since it seems like the topical thing to be doing at the moment.
Radek is looking at Greibel too, since it seems like the topical thing to be doing at the moment.
Radek: It is only recently tested, however. I cannot guarantee a consistent result after only a single trial.
 
Kyrule: Of course.
RADEK
Of course.
It is only recently tested, however. I cannot guarantee a consistent result after only a single trial.
 
KYRULE
Of course.
Even if it should fail, however, it should give me the data needed to run comprehensive tests.
Even if it should fail, however, it should give me the data needed to run comprehensive tests.
Radek glances at Kyrule curiously for a moment.
RADEK
Do you know where I could find a rift to close, then? If opening one is unacceptable.
KYRULE
I have just a one in mind.
</screenplay>
<pre>
Apheori (GM): Meanwhile, behind a random tree at the edge of the forest, Dawn and Amadi are hiding. Yes?
Apheori (GM): Meanwhile, behind a random tree at the edge of the forest, Dawn and Amadi are hiding. Yes?
Radek glances at Kyrule curiously for a moment.
Ellemerr: Yes.
Ellemerr: Yes.
Ganelon: So this was the god you mentioned, huh?
 
That might actually get along with him.
 
Apheori (GM): Maybe. Who even knows.
 
Unless you do.
Radek: Do you know where I could find a rift to close, then?
If opening one is unacceptable.
Kyrule: I have just a one in mind.
Apheori (GM): Midgets.
Um... Ellemerr!
Ellemerr: Yes?
Apheori (GM): Squirrel drops out of of your tree, grinning.
Apheori (GM): Squirrel drops out of of your tree, grinning.
Amadi makes alternatively shooing and shushing motions.
Amadi makes alternatively shooing and shushing motions.
Squirrel takes Amadi's and Dawn's hands and tries to make them dance with her.
Squirrel takes Amadi's and Dawn's hands and tries to make them dance with her.
Amadi tries to hit Squirrel over the head with a spatula with her other hand.
Amadi tries to hit Squirrel over the head with a spatula with her other hand.
Squirrel lets go and dances away, pulled Dawn out into the clearing.
 
Squirrel: pulling*
Squirrel lets go and dances away, pulling Dawn out toward the clearing.
Amadi watches fretfully from behind the tree.
 
Amadi watches fretfully.
 
Dawn tries to grab Amadi instead in order to not be pulled.
Dawn tries to grab Amadi instead in order to not be pulled.
Amadi hands Dawn the spatula.
Amadi hands Dawn the spatula.
Dawn uses the spatula on Squirrel, and Squirrel finally just lets go and runs out on her own.
 
Ganelon: Nice teamwork.
Dawn uses the spatula on Squirrel, and Squirrel finally lets go and just runs out on her own.
 
Squirrel runs up to Kyrule and then just stares up at her, grinning.
Squirrel runs up to Kyrule and then just stares up at her, grinning.
Amadi keeps watching apprehensively.
 
Amadi keeps watching apprehensively, peering around the side of the tree.
 
Dawn does the same thing, poking her head around the tree over Amadi's.
Dawn does the same thing, poking her head around the tree over Amadi's.
Kyrule sighs heavily.
Kyrule sighs heavily.
Ganelon: It's like staring into a mirror.
 
'''''Ganelon''' (Radek): It's like staring into a mirror. Except they're not scared of me!
 
Kyrule picks up Squirrel and walks over to the tree with Amadi and Dawn behind it.
Kyrule picks up Squirrel and walks over to the tree with Amadi and Dawn behind it.
Ganelon: Except they're not scared of me!
 
Amadi meeps and backs away around the tree.
 
While Amadi backs away, Dawn just stands there.
 
 
Apheori (GM): Gravy: Hole's dug, but you can't seem to get the dead god to move. It's really heavy or something.
Apheori (GM): Gravy: Hole's dug, but you can't seem to get the dead god to move. It's really heavy or something.
Amadi meeps and backs away around the tree.
Frezak: I peer around to see if anyone is looking at me.
Frezak (GM): I peer around to see if anyone is looking at me.
 
Ellemerr: I know Amadi's distracted. >.>
Nobody is.
All the midgets are.
 
Frezak (GM): THen I'll try and grab hold of space. And scrunch up the bits between the god and the hole to get it there without moving it.
Frezak: THen I'll try and grab hold of space. And scrunch up the bits between the god and the hole to get it there without moving it.
I can do that, right?
I can do that, right?
Right?
Right?
Ellemerr: xD
Ellemerr: xD
Apheori (GM): Uh... d20.
Apheori (GM): Uh... d20.
Frezak (GM):
Frezak:
rolling 1D20
rolling 1D20
(
(
Line 751: Line 837:
8
8
Apheori (GM): Apparently you can't.
Apheori (GM): Apparently you can't.
Frezak (GM): Gravy will sigh.
Frezak: Gravy will sigh.
The Gravedigger: um, 'scuse me.
 
Help with this thing?
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Apheori (GM): While Amadi backs away, Dawn just stands there.
Um, 'scuse me. Help with this thing?
 
The Gravedigger boots the godcorpse.
The Gravedigger boots the godcorpse.
Apheori (GM): Kyrule'll give you a hand in a moment.
Apheori (GM): Kyrule'll give you a hand in a moment.
Unless you want to interrupt the midget harassment.
Unless you want to interrupt the midget harassment.
Your marigolds have been found, and have been joined by another, bright red one.
Your marigolds have been found, and have been joined by another, bright red one.
The Gravedigger: OH GOSH GOD MIDGETS
 
WHERE DID THEY COME FROM
THE GRAVEDIGGER
OH GOSH GOD MIDGETS. WHERE DID THEY COME FROM?
 
Rhu walks over to Gravy to help with the god corpse.
Rhu walks over to Gravy to help with the god corpse.
Frezak (GM): That's a point, Rhu IS godly.
 
Gaurav: Godly how?
All the gods ignore him.
Ganelon: Does that mean the corpse just goes right through his hands?
Ganelon: Does that mean the corpse just goes right through his hands?
Kyrule follows Amadi around the tree.
 
Gaurav: Hah! That would make sense.
 
Apheori (GM): And then drops Squirrel in front of her.
 
Kyrule drops Squirrel in front of Amadi.
 
Amadi gives up on hiding and pretends she hasn't noticed Kyrule at all until now.
Amadi gives up on hiding and pretends she hasn't noticed Kyrule at all until now.
Amadi: Oh, Kyrule! Hello; I didn't see you there. It's been much too long. I trust you've been well?
 
Dawn: Oh, um, hello.
AMADI
Amadi still backs away, trying to make it inconspicuous, trying to get closer to Gravy. Whether he's able to help of not, he's at least very nice to have around.
Oh, Kyrule! Hello; I didn't see you there. It's been much too long. I trust you've been well?
 
DAWN
Oh, um, hello.
 
Amadi still backs away, trying to make it inconspicuous, trying to get closer to Gravy.
 
Kyrule just leaves you guys with Squirrel and goes back to Gravy.
Kyrule just leaves you guys with Squirrel and goes back to Gravy.
Apheori (GM): So much awkward.
Apheori (GM): So much awkward.
Amadi looks a little surprised. That went way better than she'd thought.
Amadi looks a little surprised. That went way better than she'd thought.
Apheori (GM): Squirrel runs after her.
Apheori (GM): Squirrel runs after her.
Kyrule hands Gravy a scythe, picks up Squirrel again, and then just holds her up to her face, glaring.
Kyrule hands Gravy a scythe, picks up Squirrel again, and then just holds her up to her face, glaring.
Dawn: (to Amadi) I guess it's all right, then?
 
Frezak (GM): I'll... examine the scythe?
DAWN
Dawn: He did say he was sorry before.
(to Amadi)
Frezak (GM): Waggle it around a bit.
I guess it's all right, then?
Amadi: He did?
 
Frezak: I'll... examine the scythe?
Frezak: Waggle it around a bit.
Apheori (GM): The scythe is large, black, a bit fancy, and feels very, very dangerous, like if you used it wrong it could probably cut through reality itself.
Apheori (GM): The scythe is large, black, a bit fancy, and feels very, very dangerous, like if you used it wrong it could probably cut through reality itself.
Kyrule: Hook him with that; it'll move him.
 
KYRULE
Hook him with that; it'll move him.
Gaurav: Is it the same sort of black as the dagger we picked up earlier?
Gaurav: Is it the same sort of black as the dagger we picked up earlier?
Apheori (GM): Similar.
Apheori (GM): Similar.
Sort of.
Sort of.
Frezak (GM): I'll hook the corpse and drag it.
Frezak: I'll hook the corpse and drag it.
Meathook!
Meathook!
Apheori (GM): Guarave: And yes, this is the same scythe I was telling you about yesterday. >.>
Apheori (GM): Guarave: And yes, this is the same scythe I was telling you about yesterday. >.>
Hah.
Hah.
You drag the corpse to the grave.
You drag the corpse to the grave.
Dawn: He did.
 
Amadi: Oh.
DAWN
Who?
He did say he was sorry before.
Dawn: Kyrule. Fred. Him.
 
Dawn points.
AMADI
Gaurav: Good lord.
Dawn: Her?
Amadi: Oh!
He did?
He did?
When?
 
Dawn: I think he did. You weren't there.
DAWN
Amadi: Oh...
He did.
Huh.
 
Where was I?
AMADI
Dawn: Dreaming.
Oh. Who?
Amadi: Well, duh.
 
Dawn: But not the first time.
DAWN
The first time you were dying. We all were.
Kyrule. Fred. Him.
(she points)
Her?
 
AMADI
Oh! He did? When?
 
DAWN
I think he did. You weren't there.
 
AMADI
Oh... huh. Where was I?
 
DAWN
Dreaming.
 
AMADI
Well, duh.
 
DAWN
But not the first time. The first time you were dying. We all were.
 
Amadi nods.
Amadi nods.
Dawn: I'm remembering.
 
DAWN
I'm remembering.
 
Amadi shudders.
Amadi shudders.
Amadi: ... Much?
 
... All?
AMADI
...Much? ...All?
 
Dawn nods, looking scared.
Dawn nods, looking scared.
Amadi looks scared too.
Amadi looks scared too.
Apheori (GM): Gravy buries the dead god. Then what?
Apheori (GM): Gravy buries the dead god. Then what?
And yes, Rhu's hand did go right through it.
And yes, Rhu's hand did go right through it.
Line 823: Line 950:
Rhu will pick up a stone to make sure it's the god that's insubstantial, not him.
Rhu will pick up a stone to make sure it's the god that's insubstantial, not him.
Apheori (GM): The stone bounces off it.
Apheori (GM): The stone bounces off it.
Frezak (GM): You're a hairy ghost.
Frezak: You're a hairy ghost.
Apheori (GM): Kyrule tells you that it's not you, but your faith.
Apheori (GM): Kyrule tells you that it's not you, but your faith.
Rhu: My faith?
 
Gaurav: Rhu the Hairy Ghost. I like the sound of that.
RHU
Kyrule: Yes.
My faith?
Rhu: ... my lack of faith, you mean.
 
Kyrule: You have faith, though it has been twisted and broken by the trials you have gone through.
KYRULE
(holding up Squirrel) Tell me, do you want this one?
Yes.
 
RHU
...my lack of faith, you mean.
 
KYRULE
You have faith, though it has been twisted and broken by the trials you have gone through.
(holding up Squirrel)
Tell me, do you want this one?
 
Ganelon: "Want" might not be the most apt choice of word.
Ganelon: "Want" might not be the most apt choice of word.
Squirrel cackles and squirms.
Squirrel cackles and squirms.
Rhu: That's a new one. We've only met her once before.
 
RHU
That's a new one. We've only met her once before.
Hazz'ridan said that they were keys, but I'm not sure he included that one. But I think he included the one that was the skull, but we lost that in midnight.
Hazz'ridan said that they were keys, but I'm not sure he included that one. But I think he included the one that was the skull, but we lost that in midnight.
Amadi: She's included.
 
Amadi adds in a mutter,
AMADI
Amadi: Like it or not.
She's included.
Kyrule: He thought to use her pieces to patch the holes? That is low, even for him.
(muttering)
Frezak (GM): Hells, right, Radek!
Like it or not.
Ask the nice lady about your toy.
 
Apheori (GM): Actually scratch that she didn't say that.
Kyrule gives Rhu a disgusted look.
I TAKE IT BACK.
 
Ellemerr: O_o
Apheori (GM): Kyrule just gives Rhu a disgusted look.
Ellemerr eats the words.
Apheori (GM): Kyrule's words, I meant.
Why would you eat them?
Ellemerr: Yep.
Apheori (GM): Oh, okay.
WELL THEN.
Thank you.
Ellemerr: You're welcome! They taste a bit funny.
Apheori (GM): Yeah, Kyrule's supposed to be playing nice with Hazz'ridan right now.
Even if she does kind of really hate him.
Ellemerr: Amadi could say it! If she knew it.
Amadi has no problem with insulting Hazz. None whatsoever.
Apheori (GM): Unfortunately she doesn't.
And neither is Kyrule supposed to know, which is the problem, which is why she has to play nice, which... er.
And neither is Kyrule supposed to know, which is the problem, which is why she has to play nice, which... er.
Ganelon: Er.
Ganelon: Er.
Line 863: Line 987:
Apheori (GM): So nobody wants squirrel, right?
Apheori (GM): So nobody wants squirrel, right?
Ganelon: The one that stalks?
Ganelon: The one that stalks?
Frezak (GM): THe thing with the rock keys.
Frezak: THe thing with the rock keys.
That we fixed with scraps of foil.
That we fixed with scraps of foil.
Ganelon: Oh, that. That's more a puzzle.
Ganelon: Oh, that. That's more a puzzle.
Line 872: Line 996:
Apheori (GM): Kyrule tells squirrel to go back to her dream, and the midget poofs.
Apheori (GM): Kyrule tells squirrel to go back to her dream, and the midget poofs.
Radek gives Squirrel a concerned look.
Radek gives Squirrel a concerned look.
Radek: Is she... necessary?
 
Gaurav: Didn't she kick a ton of ass back when Amadi took her to meet the little old lady who wouldn't give her her lollipop?
RADEK
Kyrule: No.
Is she... necessary?
Ask the key if you need her.
 
Apheori (GM): (The key seems to mean Amadi.)
KYRULE
Radek: Good, good...
No. Ask the key if you need her.
The Gravedigger: This.
 
Is one sweet grave.
RADEK
If I do say so myself.
Good, good...
 
THE GRAVEDIGGER
This. Is one sweet grave. If I do say so myself.
 
Radek digs the puzzle out of his bag of things.
Radek digs the puzzle out of his bag of things.
Ellemerr: And yeah, Gaurav, Squirrel can be awesome. But she can also be a lot of other things.
 
Radek: Since you seem to be rather helpful for a god... would you have any insights into this device?
RADEK
Since you seem to be rather helpful for a god... would you have any insights into this device?
I haven't taken much time to study it. I've been busy with other things.
I haven't taken much time to study it. I've been busy with other things.
Ganelon: Like getting lost in the forest.
Ganelon: Like getting lost in the forest.
Kyrule: I'm afraid I couldn't tell you much about it. According to history, its creation and destruction never happened, and for that alone it may be worth study.
 
Gaurav: Huh.
KYRULE
Radek: ...Fascinating.
I'm afraid I couldn't tell you much about it. According to history, its creation and destruction never happened, and for that alone it may be worth study.
 
RADEK
...Fascinating.
While functional, it lacks pieces. I cannot say how many.
While functional, it lacks pieces. I cannot say how many.
Kyrule: To find out, you may need to consider how to examine pieces of the universe that no longer exist in the universe.
 
Radek: ...I'd rather not displace myself from the universe a second time.
KYRULE
Kyrule: Indeed.
To find out, you may need to consider how to examine pieces of the universe that no longer exist in the universe.
Apheori (GM): You all ready to go to a hole?
 
Ganelon: I'm ready.
RADEK
Although the Merr's ready to fall asleep, I think.
...I'd rather not displace myself from the universe a second time.
Apheori (GM): Yups.
 
Ellemerr: Yep. >.>
KYRULE
Apheori (GM): This makes a good transition, methinks.
Indeed.
 
The Gravedigger wanders up.
The Gravedigger wanders up.
The Gravedigger: Hey guys. I buried a god. What did YOU do today?
 
Kyrule: (to Gravy) It is a good grave.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Hey guys. I buried a god. What did YOU do today?
 
KYRULE
(to Gravy)
It is a good grave.
 
The Gravedigger beams.
The Gravedigger beams.
Apheori (GM): Do you give her back the scythe?
Apheori (GM): Do you give her back the scythe?
Frezak (GM): Of course.
Frezak: Of course.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Frezak (GM): I DO want to memorise how it feels.
Frezak: I DO want to memorise how it feels.
Holding the power to slice through a reality.
Holding the power to slice through a reality.
I may need that later.
I may need that later.
Apheori (GM): It feels a little bit like the shovel should.
Apheori (GM): It feels a little bit like the shovel should.
Frezak (GM): Hmmmmmm.
Frezak: Hmmmmmm.
Kyrule: The hole awaits. Are you all ready?
 
Ellemerr: Right. Sweet nightmares.
KYRULE
Kyrule: She motions everyone, including midgets, to come over and crap and... uh...
The hole awaits. Are you all ready?
Apheori (GM): ooc
 
And next time you shall go hole.
She motions everyone, including midgets, to come over and crap and... uh...
HOLE.
 
With a god.
Apheori (GM) sniggers.
Gaurav: >.<
I wonder what's going to possess Amadi _this_ time.
Ganelon: Hole's a direction.
Gaurav: True.
Ganelon: See you later, folks.
Bear Soup Guy: Adios, all
Gaurav: Bye everybody!
</pre>
</pre>


Revision as of 05:09, 29 March 2015

≪ PreviousNext ≫
Session 49 (raw log) (Overview)
EXT. Woods - day
The Gravedigger is leading the party east through the woods. The going seems to be largely uphill.
Amadi is no longer with them, having randomly poofed somewhere along the way.
Frezak (Gravy): We may not be led in the right direction, but at least we're being led with a veneer of confidence. Ganelon (Radek): Misplaced confidence, at that.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
I sense... a tree. I speak sooth! Come, friends.
RHU
(looking around at all the other trees nearby)
A tree?
RADEK
...This is how I'm going to die, isn't it?
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Don't be silly, Radek. You're going to die at the hands of your second-greatest invention.
The Gravedigger pats Radek reassuringly.
Greibel detours slightly to head toward the tree, and the Gravedigger redirects to follow him.
RHU
(to Greibel)
Oy!
Rhu continues to follow Gravy as he starts following Greibel.


EXT. Large, shaded clearing - afternoon
The woods abruptly end at a large, shaded clearing. In the middle is a massive trunk, situated up on a bit of a rise in the middle of the clearing. Overhead are branches, lots and lots of branches, though from here most of them aren't really even visible.
The ground is mostly just rocks and crap. Thick roots jut out and over the rocks, even sticking out of the ground where it has eroded around them, forming bridges and walkways up to the trunk itself, several metres in diameter. Roots and trunk alike are covered in rough, mossy bark.
There's a presence within the tree, or maybe the tree is the presence. Either way, it seems quite intelligent, and it's watching.
It seems to be humming to itself.
The Gravedigger hums along and inspects the earth.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
This is quality soil.
Greibel steps up to the tree.
GREIBEL
HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERE'S JOHNNY! HIT ME WITH YOUR BEST SHOT! I'VE GOT A PHD IN TREE!
The tree actually seems to recoil a bit at this.
TREE
AGH WHAT?
GREIBEL
COME ON MAN. WHAT YOU GOT? YOU WANNA GO?
TREE
Go what?
Radek watches this, looking disappointed.
GREIBEL
Naw, I'm just kidding.
I sensed you over back there, you seemed important. What's up?
RADEK
So you found a talking tree.
TREE
Ah, bugger man, yeah. I've been found.
GREIBEL
Yeah. That's druids, man. We find trees. Sorry about that.
TREE
Dude. Sorry? You're not sorry. If you were sorry, it'd be all bugs to me. Like nature, what. All prickly and invasive.
Whatcha need?
GREIBEL
Uh... that's a good question. Give me a second.
(To everyone)
Hey, guys! If we hypothetically met a giant tree spirit thing, sentient, intelligent, you know, what would we ask it for?!
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Does it do wishes, hypothetically?
DAWN
(from a good distance away)
Hi tree.
TREE
Yo.
Rhu walks around the tree, trying to figure out where the voice is coming from.
TREE
(to Rhu)
Oy, no poking, what.
Rhu backs away.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Hello tree.
TREE
Hello, digger.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Digger is in the other comic. Call me Gravy.
TREE
Yeah, man, Gravy.
DAWN
People usually ask for stupid things. Things like power and truth and stuff that just makes things worse. Futures.
RHU
Truth! That's a great idea. We could ask it about truth.
Dawn gives Rhu a very disappointed look.
RADEK
(To Greibel)
Does it know anything about the holes?
Greibel looks back at the tree and shrugs.
GREIBEL
Holes? What's up with them, right?
TREE
Uuuugh. Even worse than nature, holes. Tunnel up through your roots, eating away, burning... BURNING. AGH.
Some old leaves flutter down around the party. A squirrel falls out and scampers off.
Radek does not look impressed.
GREIBEL
Hmmm, I hear ya, man.
DAWN
(to the tree)
Who are you?
TREE
What does it look like? I'm a treee. Been here ages, you know. Wasn't even a forest back then. Bloody elf buggers.
RHU
Have you seen an airship around here anywhere?
TREE
With or without dead folk?
THE GRAVEDIGGER
There's several?
TREE
They come, they go. They avoid my branches.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
How dead are we talking? Ooogly woogly walking dead?
TREE
The dead were moving about, if that's whatcha mean. Like little bugs. Headless and yet still sooo bothersome.
RADEK
(looking up skeptically at the tree)
How do you perceive anything?
TREE
I gots senses, what. You're cold and feel like earth.
Gravy is warm and feels like earth. How do you get along?
THE GRAVEDIGGER
I have an endless source of jolliness.
RADEK
We don't.
Ganelon (Radek): Those two answers are probably related.
TREE
Beetles, I see.
Dawn giggles.
The Gravedigger flutters his lashes at Radek.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
You tease.
(he hefts his shovel)
Yeah, airship, dead people?
TREE
Yeah, maaan.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
This isn't a threatening gesture, I was thinking about the dead people.
TREE
They went smash.
As the tree says this, the Gravedigger gets a vague vision of an airship shape and stuff crashing into a bunch of smaller trees.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Sweet.
There's a bit of a crashing in the branches above, and Squirrel falls out of the tree. She bounces up almost immediately, squealing happily, and then just runs off into the rest of the trees, rather like her namesake had done earlier.
Greibel watches for a moment.
GREIBEL
Fun girl.
Radek sees it too, but is 90% sure it didn't actually happen.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
(to the tree)
Anything we can do for you while we're here?
TREE
Naw, dude, don't do it. You'll dig too far and it'll get out this time.
RHU
(to the tree)
Are you guys, like, a species or something? We saw a giant tree next to a Hole earlier, but it seemed to be dead. Er, like two hundred years ago on the other side of this planet. Or something.
TREE
Trees, man.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Hey, if you could make a platform thing with some branches, maybe airships would stop by on their way past.
TREE
Hmmmm.
There's something of a shuffling really high up in the tree's branches.
TREE
Maaaaybe.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Just a thought. If we see living airship people we'll suggest it.
TREE
Coool, man.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Everyone good to go poke around this airship, then?
(leaning in a swervy fashion toward Radek)
Raaaaadek?
Radek crosses his arms.
Something massive crashes into the branches above, and this time the tree actually seems to notice.
TREE
Whaaaat?
There is a horrible WHOMP as two large figures - the gods Kyrule and Djieka - crash into the ground at high speed, with one propelled downward by the other and taking the brunt of the impact as a result. A cloud of dirt and leaves is thrown outward.
A moment later, branches shower down around everyone, especially the two gods.
Radek narrowly dodges a falling branch. The Gravedigger covers him with his shield.
Rhu, on the other hand, dodges right into a branch and gets clonked on the head. He falls over.
TREE
(directed toward the two gods)
Man, watch it, will you?
GREIBEL
Whoa. Far out.
As everything stops falling down, Amadi randomly appears, brushing some twigs and leaves out of her hair. They are distinctly different from the leaves on any of the surrounding trees.
The Gravedigger goes to check on Rhu.
Rhu seems to be fine, though he just lies there for the time being.
Amadi suddenly notices who one of the gods is and tries to look inconspicuous behind the Gravedigger. Dawn joins her.
The god on top, Kyrule, is a masked woman dressed all in grey, a full meter taller than the Gravedigger. She gets up slowly, her foot rather firmly planted on the other's chest, seemingly oblivious to the damage she has caused around her.
The other one, Djieka, just looks ridiculous. He has gleaming bits sticking out all over, and geometric holes through his form in odd locations, and entirely too many limbs, and too much colour. Some parts are like windows into the cosmos, revealing starfields and more, while others are just unreal. He is all a bit beat up at this point, however, full of twigs and covered in dirt, and leaves, and a bit of what might be blood.
DJIEKA
You can't do this.
KYRULE
I have made my position known, and I have sued for peace, and still you have persisted. Relent. End your futile struggle. Relent.
Apheori (GM): Any interest in interrupting this?

Ganelon (Radek): I'd like to try to uh... identify the ridiculous one? What the hell is it? Apheori (GM): You're reasonably sure it's some kind of god. Nothing else would be that... excessive. Ganelon (Radek): And it's gettin' beat up? Apheori (GM): Yup.

Ganelon (Radek): Then hell no he's not interrupting.
The Gravedigger wanders up and looms in an interested fashion.
DJIEKA
I will not relent! Not to you!
KYRULE
(looking down on Djieka in utter disappointment)
You fool.
She kneels down on top of him, and he tries to pull away, but he's pinned, half-buried already from the force of the impact, and held down, for she is far bigger, far more real, pressing him to the earth.
She curls her fingers on his chest.
KYRULE
(in a half-whisper)
One last chance. Relent.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
'scuse me. You guys gods?
Amadi whimpers a little from behind the Gravedigger.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Because I had some questions.
Kyrule looks up slowly and holds up a finger in Gravy's direction.
KYRULE
A moment, please.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Okay.
Kyrule turns her full attention back on Djieka.
KYRULE
Relent!
Djieka doesn't answer.
Rhu gets up and walks towards the Gravedigger, dusting himself off.
RHU
I think the grey one is Kyrule. Hazz' said he might know about the Holes or something.
(to Amadi)
And you've talked about him from time to... you okay? Why are you whimpering?
Amadi makes shushing motions and pretends she's not there.
DAWN
(to Rhu)
We're not here, okay? Not here.
KYRULE
(to Djieka)
Then I shall have your heart. All of your joy, your hope, your worth, everything that makes you who and what you are, will be taken. Even your light. And your life.
DJIEKA
No!
THE GRAVEDIGGER
That sounds pretty mean. Are you the bad guy? I'm only asking because I might have to interrupt.
Kyrule ignores the Gravedigger's question and draws a strange, brilliant light out of Djieka's chest, and it forms a bit of a ball in her hand. As she does so, he almost seems to come up with it, fighting, trying to get it back, until she pulls it too far away and he falls back, not moving, his colour faded, his reality... lessened.
But not gone.
KYRULE
And you will have nothing.
Amadi tries to really not be there.
Dawn clings to Amadi.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
I'm gonna be honest. You don't seem like a very nice entity.
KYRULE
(tilting her head ever so slightly toward the Gravedigger)
I'm not.
Kyrule takes the light, now cupping it in both hands, and presses it to her own chest, and it disappears.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
(he shrugs)
At least you're honest about it.
Kyrule rises slowly, focusing on nothing in particular, before finally turning toward the Gravedigger entirely.
The Gravedigger waves.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
So what was that all about, then?
KYRULE
He thought to oppose me, blind to the consequences, the devastation that an all-out war would cause. Most of the gods understood, but only most.
For those who would not relent, I could only show them that there will be other consequences, more personal, more close to home. Fools.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
You sound like the grump. No offense, grump.
RADEK
Don't you think that there are greater concerns at the moment than punishing dissidents? Or is the unraveling of the dimensions somehow beneath you?
THE GRAVEDIGGER
(whispering to Radek)
You mean that morally rather than spatially, right?
RADEK
I do not.
KYRULE
Always. Which is why their dissidence could not be allowed to continue.
Kyrule walks around Gravedigger and tries to peer behind him at the midgets.
The Gravedigger rotates to hide the midgets.
The midgets rotate with him.
Kyrule tries to peer over the Gravedigger instead.
The Gravedigger leans over backwards.
Kyrule leans over with him, curving like a noodle.
Gravy gives her a friendly beam to bluff that it's just coincidental that he felt like pivoting and bending backwards.
Dawn leans out and makes shooing gestures with her hands.
RHU
(interrupting the peculiar display of noodliness)
Um, excuse me, Your... Godliness. My god Hazz'ridan the All-End asked me to speak with you.
Kyrule stops and then backs away a bit.
RHU
He thought you might be able to help with these... Holes? Big creepy crack in reality spewing zombies?
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Zombies! Shadow stuff. Also a beach, I think.
RHU
Yes! That too.
KYRULE
And your Hazz'ridan could not even bring this up himself, not now, not in the beginning, not ever?
He is not one you should be following, certainly not regarding this.
RADEK
(muttering to Gravy)
...Do you think he'll finally listen now that a god's said it?
THE GRAVEDIGGER
No. Religious people don't listen. That's how they manage to keep it up.
Kyrule smiles slightly under her mask.
RHU
He can't help us as much as he'd like. We need to fix these Holes ourself.
KYRULE
You aren't wrong. The Rifts need to be closed. Unfortunately, where he won't act because the rifts serve his interests, I cannot act.
Radek just rolls his eyes at Kyrule's statement. In a "of course you can't", sort of way.
RHU
His interests?
Anyway, yes, we are attempting to close the Holes. We closed one just a few days ago, but then our shadows came to life and tried to kill us and stuff.
(he points towards Radek)
Well, he did.
KYRULE
His goal is to spread, through whatever means possible. He is as a plague upon the named realms, spreading through and beyond, and where rifts in the fabric of the realms arise, he uses and propagates them further.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Hey, Tree? What do you think of this ladypersonthing?
TREE
(to Gravy)
Seems a little different from before, but she's all good, man.
Done something with her hair.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Sweet. Thanks, tree.
KYRULE
(to the tree)
Hey Vivek.
TREE
Hey yourself. What's up, man?
KYRULE
Oh, you know how it is. You die horribly, you put on a new face, you wonder where it all went wrong...
TREE
Oh, no, no idea what you're talking about. No idea at all.
RHU
We're trying to close those rifts. I think he's mostly supportive of this goal.
Assuming those Holes are also rifts, I guess. I don't know if I actually know what we're doing.
KYRULE
Perhaps.
RHU
Are there others out there, trying to close the Holes?
Kyrule ignores Rhu and looks around for anyone smarter.
RADEK
None. They're too busy dismissing my theories.
Radek gives the Gravedigger a sharp glare.
Ganelon (Radek): Uh oh. I was just trying to be snappy but now I've just drawn attention to myself, haven't I?
KYRULE
(to Radek)
Your theories are largely correct, but unfortunately the rifts and thinnies are but small symptoms of the overall problem.
RADEK
I wasn't waiting for your validation, but by all means, continue.
KYRULE
The universe grows thin. It is old and tired, and all the fighting of the worlds simply weakens it further.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
That's cheery.
Ganelon (Radek): She's saying that the expansion of the universe is fucking everything up? I have to IMPLODE THE UNIVERSE to fix this?
KYRULE
Your companion wasn't wrong. I should be fixing this. But Kyrule as Kyrule does not know how. He was not given that knowledge when he was named, for to do so would only have broken his mind.
He must learn on his own, and that is no easy task. I've only seen it done once before, and it took many tries before that succeeded, and great cost.
RHU
Might... Hazz'ridan have that knowledge?
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Soooo... Dimensional spackle won't cut it?
RADEK
You'll need to forgive me for refusing to wait patiently for Kyrule to come upon a solution without assistance. To affect change on this scale seems to be impossible, however. I am outnumbered astronomically by the presence of counter-productive fools.
KYRULE
(to Radek)
Please, as with this morning, try to restrain yourself when things go ill - the more damage is done, the worse the overall situation will become. Those fools need not incite you to become equally foolish.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Seeeee? I told you it was a bad idea to shatter the universe!
RADEK
Hmph. It could have served to persuade him.
GREIBEL
HEY LADY! HEY! HEY! HEY LADY! HEY NICE LADY!
Greibel jumps up and down pointing at himself.
GREIBEL
WOOP WOOP!
KYRULE
Um... yes?
GREIBEL
What is your favorite salad?
Kyrule takes off her mask and gives Greibel a long look.
Greibel strikes a pose, rather like a fashion model.
KYRULE
Caesar salad, I suppose.
GREIBEL
Oooooooo, excellent choice. Mine's POTATO SALAD! BOINK!
Greibel throws a potato at Kyrule.
Kyrule catches the potato and then looks at it like it's a bit unusual.
Greibel grins knowingly.
RADEK
...As I said, counter-productive fools.
Bear Soup Guy (Greibel): This is all part of his plan that he hasn't thought of yet. And he probably never will.
Ganelon (Radek): Personally I approve wholeheartedly of Greibel's cunning scheme.
RHU
(to Kyrule, knowing full well that she'll ignore him)
Can you help us with any of this? I think we're looking for Holes to experiment on, or other... smart people who can help.
RADEK
That would be useful, yes. If... hrm.
KYRULE
(to Radek)
Your research has made considerable strides already. The question is, what do you intend to do with it?
RADEK
What else? I have to correct this monumental blunder before it's too late.
KYRULE
All of it? Everything?
Do you intend to fix everything, every hole, every tear, every thin spot in the entirety of the fabric of the universe? And when the one is finished, what of the others? Will you move on, universe to universe, until all of the multiverse is solid and absolute, no more holes, no more uncertainty, no more variance in the possibilities that face those within? What then, when you are unto, nay, beyond a god yourself? What will you do but continue as you always have, without reason, only a purpose that has outlived any need? Is this what you want?
When do you stop?
THE GRAVEDIGGER
If you're going to do a job, you do it right. Or until you're tired and feel like a nap.
KYRULE
That works with burying things. Not so much with purpose, or reason. Have you ever buried a god?
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Not yet! That I know of. I did a dragon the other day.
RADEK
...Why should I stop?
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Because if you remove all variance in the world it would be sad and boring, you boob.
RADEK
The nature of progress is infinite. I can always find a direction to advance in - even the search itself is progress. I will never need to stop.
KYRULE
Gods don't stay buried. That makes it work, because for something that big to simply stay put indefinitely would take a piece of the world away, removed, nonexistent.
Progress shouldn't stay buried either, but if you close it up, remove the opportunities, it loses its potential. It is no longer infinite.
TREE
Just don't go burying anything in my roots, 'kay?
THE GRAVEDIGGER
No probs, Tree.
Radek waves his hand dismissively.
RADEK
If I can reverse the expansion of the universe, I can encourage it as well. The flaws that have led to this catastrophe may yet be corrected.
KYRULE
To find that balance is a hard problem, and why we are in this situation in the first place.
How do you know you will know when to reverse the process back, when you cannot see it with an absolute eye?
Amadi makes a disdainful snort from behind Gravy, forgetting for a moment that she's being not there.
Gaurav (Rhu): Now I want an absolute eye.
Ellemerr (Amadi): Here, take mine. It's been creeping me out anyway.
Kyrule tries walking around Gravy again, this time going the other direction.
The Gravedigger pivots amiably.
KYRULE
(leaning over him awkwardly)
You still dig holes, yes?
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Yep.
TREE
Dude, not in my roots you don't.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
's cool, Tree. Chill out.
KYRULE
Bury things?
TREE
As long as it's not in my roots.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Yep.
KYRULE
(indicating the nearby god corpse)
Would you like to bury a god?
The Gravedigger is silent for a while.
The Gravedigger stares at the dirt and the stars.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
(finally)
Yes.
But first I must hide my mmm-----aaaarigolds?
KYRULE
Just as long as it's not petunias. I don't think we could take it if it were petunias.
The Gravedigger starts shuffling backwards slowly.
RADEK
...What's wrong with him?
Kyrule tries to keep a straight face.
KYRULE
He needs to hide his... marigolds. From me. For reasons.
(yelling after Gravy)
I can see right through you, you know!
RHU
Why petunias? Why not petunias?
The Gravedigger scoots back behind the treeline and hides his... flowers behind a tree.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
(yelling around the tree)
JUST PUTTING AWAY MY... UH... FLOWERS. YES SIRREE.
The Gravedigger returns a bit later, midget-free, and considers the god corpse.
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Okay, tree, where's a good place for me to bury this here god?
TREE
Hmmmmm. How about...
The tree shuffles a bunch of roots around, finally making a space for a grave a bit off to the side.
TREE
Here?
THE GRAVEDIGGER
Great.
(he pulls up imaginary sleeves)
Let's do this!
The Gravedigger gets to digging, humming the tree song.
While Gravy's digging and the midgets are stowed, Kyrule seems to address Radek. For some reason she's looking at Greibel, however.
KYRULE
Your process for closing the rifts. Would you be willing to give a demonstration?
Greibel is making faces. Stretching the skin out on the sides of his face with his hands. Pulling the porridge over his face like a beekeeper's mask.
Radek is looking at Greibel too, since it seems like the topical thing to be doing at the moment.
RADEK
Of course.
It is only recently tested, however. I cannot guarantee a consistent result after only a single trial.
KYRULE
Of course.
Even if it should fail, however, it should give me the data needed to run comprehensive tests.
Radek glances at Kyrule curiously for a moment.
RADEK
Do you know where I could find a rift to close, then? If opening one is unacceptable.
KYRULE
I have just a one in mind.



Apheori (GM): Meanwhile, behind a random tree at the edge of the forest, Dawn and Amadi are hiding. Yes?
Ellemerr: Yes.



Apheori (GM): Squirrel drops out of of your tree, grinning.

Amadi makes alternatively shooing and shushing motions.

Squirrel takes Amadi's and Dawn's hands and tries to make them dance with her.

Amadi tries to hit Squirrel over the head with a spatula with her other hand.

Squirrel lets go and dances away, pulling Dawn out toward the clearing.

Amadi watches fretfully.

Dawn tries to grab Amadi instead in order to not be pulled.

Amadi hands Dawn the spatula.

Dawn uses the spatula on Squirrel, and Squirrel finally lets go and just runs out on her own.

Squirrel runs up to Kyrule and then just stares up at her, grinning.

Amadi keeps watching apprehensively, peering around the side of the tree.

Dawn does the same thing, poking her head around the tree over Amadi's.

Kyrule sighs heavily.

'''''Ganelon''' (Radek): It's like staring into a mirror. Except they're not scared of me!

Kyrule picks up Squirrel and walks over to the tree with Amadi and Dawn behind it.

Amadi meeps and backs away around the tree.

While Amadi backs away, Dawn just stands there.


Apheori (GM): Gravy: Hole's dug, but you can't seem to get the dead god to move. It's really heavy or something.
Frezak: I peer around to see if anyone is looking at me.

Nobody is.

Frezak: THen I'll try and grab hold of space. And scrunch up the bits between the god and the hole to get it there without moving it.
I can do that, right?
Right?
Ellemerr: xD
Apheori (GM): Uh... d20.
Frezak:
rolling 1D20
(
8
)
=
8
Apheori (GM): Apparently you can't.
Frezak: Gravy will sigh.

THE GRAVEDIGGER
Um, 'scuse me. Help with this thing?

The Gravedigger boots the godcorpse.

Apheori (GM): Kyrule'll give you a hand in a moment.
Unless you want to interrupt the midget harassment.
Your marigolds have been found, and have been joined by another, bright red one.

THE GRAVEDIGGER
OH GOSH GOD MIDGETS. WHERE DID THEY COME FROM?

Rhu walks over to Gravy to help with the god corpse.

Ganelon: Does that mean the corpse just goes right through his hands?



Kyrule drops Squirrel in front of Amadi.

Amadi gives up on hiding and pretends she hasn't noticed Kyrule at all until now.

AMADI
Oh, Kyrule! Hello; I didn't see you there. It's been much too long. I trust you've been well?

DAWN
Oh, um, hello.

Amadi still backs away, trying to make it inconspicuous, trying to get closer to Gravy.

Kyrule just leaves you guys with Squirrel and goes back to Gravy.

Apheori (GM): So much awkward.
Amadi looks a little surprised. That went way better than she'd thought.
Apheori (GM): Squirrel runs after her.
Kyrule hands Gravy a scythe, picks up Squirrel again, and then just holds her up to her face, glaring.

DAWN
(to Amadi)
I guess it's all right, then?

Frezak: I'll... examine the scythe?
Frezak: Waggle it around a bit.
Apheori (GM): The scythe is large, black, a bit fancy, and feels very, very dangerous, like if you used it wrong it could probably cut through reality itself.

KYRULE
Hook him with that; it'll move him.
Gaurav: Is it the same sort of black as the dagger we picked up earlier?
Apheori (GM): Similar.
Sort of.
Frezak: I'll hook the corpse and drag it.
Meathook!
Apheori (GM): Guarave: And yes, this is the same scythe I was telling you about yesterday. >.>
Hah.
You drag the corpse to the grave.

DAWN
He did say he was sorry before.

AMADI
He did?

DAWN
He did.

AMADI
Oh. Who?

DAWN
Kyrule. Fred. Him.
(she points)
Her?

AMADI
Oh! He did? When?

DAWN
I think he did. You weren't there.

AMADI
Oh... huh. Where was I?

DAWN
Dreaming.

AMADI
Well, duh.

DAWN
But not the first time. The first time you were dying. We all were.

Amadi nods.

DAWN
I'm remembering.

Amadi shudders.

AMADI
...Much? ...All?

Dawn nods, looking scared.

Amadi looks scared too.


Apheori (GM): Gravy buries the dead god. Then what?
And yes, Rhu's hand did go right through it.
Gaurav: Eeks.
Rhu will pick up a stone to make sure it's the god that's insubstantial, not him.
Apheori (GM): The stone bounces off it.
Frezak: You're a hairy ghost.
Apheori (GM): Kyrule tells you that it's not you, but your faith.

RHU
My faith?

KYRULE
Yes.

RHU
...my lack of faith, you mean.

KYRULE
You have faith, though it has been twisted and broken by the trials you have gone through.
(holding up Squirrel)
Tell me, do you want this one?

Ganelon: "Want" might not be the most apt choice of word.

Squirrel cackles and squirms.

RHU
That's a new one. We've only met her once before.
Hazz'ridan said that they were keys, but I'm not sure he included that one. But I think he included the one that was the skull, but we lost that in midnight.

AMADI
She's included.
(muttering)
Like it or not.

Kyrule gives Rhu a disgusted look.

And neither is Kyrule supposed to know, which is the problem, which is why she has to play nice, which... er.
Ganelon: Er.
Which toy is this?
Apheori (GM): So nobody wants squirrel, right?
Ganelon: The one that stalks?
Frezak: THe thing with the rock keys.
That we fixed with scraps of foil.
Ganelon: Oh, that. That's more a puzzle.
Yeah, alright.
Ellemerr: Amadi might want Squirrel, I guess. I'm not sure.
Also I have to go sleep soon. I'll get a toothbrush.
Not NOW, but soon. Soooooon.
Apheori (GM): Kyrule tells squirrel to go back to her dream, and the midget poofs.
Radek gives Squirrel a concerned look.

RADEK
Is she... necessary?

KYRULE
No. Ask the key if you need her.

RADEK
Good, good...

THE GRAVEDIGGER
This. Is one sweet grave. If I do say so myself.

Radek digs the puzzle out of his bag of things.

RADEK
Since you seem to be rather helpful for a god... would you have any insights into this device?
I haven't taken much time to study it. I've been busy with other things.

Ganelon: Like getting lost in the forest.

KYRULE
I'm afraid I couldn't tell you much about it. According to history, its creation and destruction never happened, and for that alone it may be worth study.

RADEK
...Fascinating.
While functional, it lacks pieces. I cannot say how many.

KYRULE
To find out, you may need to consider how to examine pieces of the universe that no longer exist in the universe.

RADEK
...I'd rather not displace myself from the universe a second time.

KYRULE
Indeed.

The Gravedigger wanders up.

THE GRAVEDIGGER
Hey guys. I buried a god. What did YOU do today?

KYRULE
(to Gravy)
It is a good grave.

The Gravedigger beams.



Apheori (GM): Do you give her back the scythe?
Frezak: Of course.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Frezak: I DO want to memorise how it feels.
Holding the power to slice through a reality.
I may need that later.
Apheori (GM): It feels a little bit like the shovel should.
Frezak: Hmmmmmm.

KYRULE
The hole awaits. Are you all ready?

She motions everyone, including midgets, to come over and crap and... uh...


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Session 49 (Overview)
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I could defend this. But that's because I argue a lot.