View source for Holes/Session 2

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<screenplay>
INT. Sarathi building corridor upstairs - day

Greibel is outside the quantum shop with Lokshmi. They procede to stare at each other for an alarmingly long time.

LOKSHMI
Well?

GREIBEL
Oh, right.

They stare at each other some more.

LOKSHMI
Why did I even bother?

Lokshmi vanishes.

Greibel looks around innocently.


INT. Sarathi building lobby

Corpses are all over the floor.

Radek looks at the corpses, concludes there must be some sort of teleportation going on, and tries to trace the magic. He finds nothing. ''(rolled 14 arcana)''

He procedes to sit there being rather grumpy.

THE GRAVEDIGGER
Well. These guys are dead. Trust me on this, guys. Dead people, right here.

The dead people continue to be all over the floor. The Gravedigger starts going through their pockets and stuff. He picks one of them up and tries to shake it upside-down until things fall out, except the entire thing falls apart and he winds up with a pile of corpse on his feet.

RHU
Ew.

Greibel half-slides, half-stumbles down the stairs and falls over in front of Rhu.

The Gravedigger looks at them, then tries shaking another corpse. This time it works and some things fall out, including a fork, some data discs, and a wad of lint.

He shoves the discs at Radek.

THE GRAVEDIGGER
A CLUE!

GREIBEL
(finally getting up)
Guys, I saw a talking locksmith! And a room that isn't there anymore!

THE GRAVEDIGGER
How do you know it was a locksmith? Did he have lockpicks?

Radek looks over the disks skeptically.

GREIBEL
It told me it was a locksmith. It was a ''talking'' locksmith after all.

THE GRAVEDIGGER
Most lockmiths do.

GREIBEL
I'm sure the locksmith told me something important. About keys or something. I just can't remember what it was.

The Gravedigger shrugs.

THE GRAVEDIGGER
Check your pockets for keys? Or STOP TAKING DRUGS.

GREIBEL
Yes! There was something about a sandcastle!

Greibel also checks his pockets. He doesn't seem to find anything.

GREIBEL
Well, that's an unfortunate state of affairs.

RHU
What about the locksmith?

GREIBEL
The locksmith, it looked like... a cat!

THE GRAVEDIGGER
Cats can't be locksmiths. They have paws. Can't hold tools.

GREIBEL
Yes, but what if you were a locksmith that simply looked like a cat?

RHU
Are you sure that wasn't... no, it can't be.

GREIBEL
Right! It told me its name was Lokshmi.

THE GRAVEDIGGER
So you met a cat that told you it was a god?

GREIBEL
A god of keys!

THE GRAVEDIGGER
Well, that would be the first living thing on this planet that's not us. Where is it?

RADEK
In his head, I'm sure.

GREIBEL
She seemed dissatisfied with me, and then left.

THE GRAVEDIGGER
Probably because you're on drugs.

RHU
Three tails? Broken horn? Spots? ''That'' Lokshmi?

GREIBEL
Yeah, that's what she was like. And she told me something very important about a sandcastle, and then dragged me out of the room that wasn't there.

THE GRAVEDIGGER
WHAT did she say about a sandcastle?

GREIBEL
She showed me one, in some sort of vision

THE GRAVEDIGGER
Really now.

RHU
But she's dangerous! Why would the god of memory and revenge want with a sandcastle? This is probably a very bad sign.

THE GRAVEDIGGER
IF gods ARE talking to us, then it would be a bad thing. Especially if they're talking to Greibel. No offense, Greibel.

RHU
But the bodies...

Rhu's eyes seem to sort of glaze over.

GREIBEL
None taken, horse dude.

THE GRAVEDIGGER
Horse? What?

GREIBEL
Hey, I didn't give you those hooves.

Greibel stares off into space lazily.

'''''Ganelon''': Does he actually have hooves?
'''''Frezak''': I don't think so.

RADEK
It's amazing how you people still take anything he says seriously. Get over here. I have disks.

THE GRAVEDIGGER
SCIENCE.

Greibel gets over to Radek and leaves Rhu staring off into space.

Radek sticks the disks in his computer. It's a very tense moment as they load and read. Then the images come on screen.

The images are cats. Specifically, they're all pictures of Lokshmi for some reason.

RADEK
...Well.

He checks the others and doesn't find much else - they're all normal random things that don't say much of anything.

RADEK
I conclude that the people who died in this room possessed an aversion to recording useful information. Particularly regarding their deaths. Very inconsiderate of them.

GREIBEL
But who can really blame them? Look at the kitty!

The computer suddenly dies.

Greibel sees Lokshmi coming down the stairs, followed by a new person - Aziraphale. ''(rolled 4 sanity)''

GREIBEL
(pointing)
Woah hey, it's the locksmith guys!

The others look and see nothing, then Radek notices a shimmering again above some of the stairs.

THE GRAVEDIGGER
Really, Greibel. Less drugs.

Greibel shirks it off and goes over the the foot of the stairs.

RADEK
...Bloody illusions.

THE GRAVEDIGGER
More fish?

Radek ignores them and goes back to trying to fix his computer. ''(rolled 27 tech)'' He finally gets it to turn on again and boot after a bit of tinkering, but it won't connect to the main servers.

THE GRAVEDIGGER
Hey, Radek. You think you could get into the cameras and see what happened to this place?

RADEK
Not from here, I couldn't.

THE GRAVEDIGGER
From where, then? Because it's either cameras or hallucinations.

RADEK
Find me a terminal, or better yet, the security room.

The Gravedigger gets out a map.

Greibel is still watching the stairs, and sees Lokshmi and Aziraphale coming down again.

GREIBEL
Right.

Greibel glances back, then tries to engage the newcomers without distracting the others.

GREIBEL
Hi Lokshmi! Hi other guy!

LOKSHMI
Oh, so you do know my name. I am shocked.

GREIBEL
I figured it out again after I wasn't so stoned and stuff. Who's your non-cat friend?

AZIRAPHALE
Hi... person with face who looks like it was hit with a football.

GREIBEL
That's very perceptive of you.

AZIRAPHALE
Yes, yes it is.

Aziraphale looks around suspiciously.

LOKSHMI
He is real, paladin.

GREIBEL
Why did you bring him here?

LOKSHMI
Your collective survival depends up on it. And... I was bored.

GREIBEL
Oh, cool man. I get bored like that sometimes too.

AZIRAPHALE
(to Greibel)
So, who are you? Who are these other people? Where is everyone?

Aziraphale's fingers twitches on his weapon.

GREIBEL
Everyone's mostly dead, man. Oh but we didn't kill 'em. Naw, we got hired to check the place out. We came here in a space ship and everything.

AZIRAPHALE
Space ship? Did you meet anyone alive on your way here?

LOKSHMI
The living do not stay living.

GREIBEL
Well that would be pretty silly man, think of it. Meeting alive people in the vacuum of space? Pssshh.

AZIRAPHALE
Fair point.

The Gravedigger notices Greibel isn't alone and seems to actually be talking to a real person and a real cat.

THE GRAVEDIGGER
Oh, no. Am I on drugs too? Radek, are you on drugs too?

RADEK
No, I see them too.

Aziraphale starts to relax a bit, but then eyes the people looking at him suspiciously and grips his weapon.

Lokshmi trots over toward them and plops down next to Radek.

The Gravedigger
I DID NOT SMOKE ANYTHING.

LOKSHMI
You are not hallucinating.

THE GRAVEDIGGER
Prove it.

LOKSHMI
How?

THE GRAVEDIGGER
That's just what a hallucination would say. I don't know. I dig holes. I don't deal with philosophy or whatever.

Aziraphale goes over to The Gravedigger and punches him in the arm.

AZIRAPHALE
I'm as real as you are.

THE GRAVEDIGGER
Hey! Don't punch me!

GREIBEL
Oh I know! If you're real, sing La Cucaracha!

RADEK
I'm supposed to believe that I'm talking to a god, is that it?

LOKSHMI
Radek J. Fulvius, what you believe is and isn't real is your own concern.

THE GRAVEDIGGER
Hey, Radek. A god knows your name.

RADEK
Marvelous. No doubt it wants something from me, too.

'''''Apheori (GM)''': Gravy: A certainty settles in your mind that this is indeed real, that this is the god Lokshmi before you, and that tuna is utterly amazing.
'''''Frezak''': I'd like to point that i'm a seven foot slab of flesh.
'''''Apheori (GM)''': Yes. She's a god and she can mess with minds, though.

LOKSHMI
No doubt.

THE GRAVEDIGGER
(shaking it off)
What, like it wants you to debug a hard drive?

'''''Frezak''': That was Gravy's entire technical lingo.

Aziraphale walks around the room looking at the corpses and walls and shops and potted plants.

LOKSHMI
Your technical knowledge is impressive, Gravedigger.

Radek scoffs.

THE GRAVEDIGGER
Thanks!
(indicating Aziraphale)
So who's he, then?

LOKSHMI
(loudly)
Everyone. I have words.

Aziraphale comes back to the group, and everyone gathers around Radek for some reason.

THE GRAVEDIGGER
Is it a story? I like stories.

GREIBEL
Oh boy, me too!

AZIRAPHALE
So, who are you people? Flat-face there told me you came from a space ship.

THE GRAVEDIGGER
Yeah. It made sanwiches.

GREIBEL
Oh yeah, it did.

RADEK
Does that mean you're a local?

AZIRAPHALE
Yes... yes. I am a local, at least more local than you seem to be.

RHU
We came on behalf of a consortium of worlds interested in investigating what happened here. So what happened here?

AZIRAPHALE
I do not know. I thought you might. I was... doing something somewhere, and when I exited the place where I was doing something, everyone was gone.
You said you came here to investigate. So what did you find?

LOKSHMI
(mostly to herself)
Fine. I can wait. I can spend all day waiting. It's not like I have anything better to do than wait.

Lokshmi sits down and starts licking one of her tails.

GREIBEL
Hey guys, maybe the cat chick knows something.

RADEK
Do you ''actually'' have something better to do, Lokshmi?

Lokshmi looks up and gives Radek a sort of long cat glare.

LOKSHMI
...no.

'''''Ganelon''': The gods are never busy. It's why they get bored so easily.

LOKSHMI
(still licking herself)
There are very few living remaining. And those that are, are not who they were. Or what they were.

THE GRAVEDIGGER
What are they then? Fish?

AZIRAPHALE
Lunatics or zombies, if the ones I saw are any judge. And as you know, zombies are supposed to have been wiped out two millenia ago.

LOKSHMI
Here, they were. But this is not the case... elsewhere. This disaster spans many realities, and many different versions of the present, for time and space have been twisted. In a way it has separated from the rest of what you may know as reality.
(she spits out a glob of hair)
So I am waiting here, within the anomaly, because otherwise I may miss it entirely.

GREIBEL
Oooohh, elsewhere in space and time, right?

LOKSHMI
...yes.

GREIBEL
Man, this cat chick is blowing my mind.

THE GRAVEDIGGER
Sounds very magical.

LOKSHMI
Would that it were, but I am afraid magic has nothing to do with it. Even the eyes of the gods are blinded.
This is not your story, however. The real story is yet to come, at least for us. For you, the story lies elsewhere.
(she tuggs at a tuft of fur for a moment, then stop preening entirely and just sits up)
Fact of the matter is you will probably never go home at all. But should you try, you will need to remember this: It is Ajirahd and Irundha of Akrikdirin Vak who reign king of the sandcastle. You must remember this. You must return to this.

RADEK
You couldn't have told us this before we left?

LOKSHMI
Radek... You who would have nothing of the gods would now ask in retrospect? But no, you could not be told. Those outside do not know.

THE GRAVEDIGGER
Um. Miss cat god thing? Can you say that less gibberishly?

LOKSHMI
The riddle is the riddle that is used universally. You will need to figure it out for yourselves.

THE GRAVEDIGGER
Well that's not very helpful.

RADEK
I only wish that the gods would return my sentiment.

LOKSHMI
Considering the general level of incompetence amongst most of them, I can't say I quite disagree.
And no, it isn't helpful. But it's as helpful as I can be. You should be glad I have nothing better to do than try.

THE GRAVEDIGGER
I should?

AZIRAPHALE
Probably. Gods are right buggers, the lot of them.

Aziraphale mutters to himself.

Radek feels a strange buzzing in his ears. It's slight, just enough to be annoying, but growing. ''(rolled 3 sanity)''

RHU
Why are you here?

LOKSHMI
It's beginning and nobody would listen. Not even the Kings. They, who are sworn to protect all against... this.
(she cocks her head as though hearing something)
Good luck, Wayfarers.

Lokshmi vanishes.

THE GRAVEDIGGER
Huh.
(turning to Aziraphale)
Well, Mr... whoever you are. We're gonna go look for the security center. Since we have a job to do.

AZIRAPHALE
I'll come with you.

The party heads off.

AZIRAPHALE
Name's Aziraphale. Somewhat pleased to meet you on account of the fact that you're the first people alive and possibly sane I've seen in days.

THE GRAVEDIGGER
Awesome.
You didn't see any of the other... exploration parties that came here?

AZIRAPHALE
No-o. I got attacked by a horde of zombies and a bunch of lunatics, but unless those were the exploration parties you mentioned, no.

'''''Wen''': oh, and I saw some crazy stuff, but I'm not mentioning it because it'd make me look insane.

'''''Frezak''': Consider that you're next to Greibel.

AZIRAPHALE
So guy with the computer is Radek. The rest of you?

THE GRAVEDIGGER
I'm The Gravedigger. You can call me Gravy.

GREIBEL
I, friend Aziraphale, am Greibel.

Greibel bows.

AZIRAPHALE
Hi Gravy. Hello...

THE GRAVEDIGGER
He's on drugs.

AZIRAPHALE
Quite obviously.

RHU
I'm Rhu. I'm not on drugs.

AZIRAPHALE
Good to hear.

RHU
I thought so too!


INT. Sarathi building corridor

The party, now five, heads toward the security center, with the Gravedigger in the lead.

Radek's buzzing is getting worse.

'''''Ganelon''': This would likely lead to him being more visibly distressed by it. He wouldn't say anything, though.

'''''Frezak''': I'm probably used to him frowning all the time. And being grumpy.

Aziraphale looks around suspiciously as he walks. He hears a wall call out as they pass, "C'mon, you know you want it."

He jumps and walks more quickly, casting furtive glances at where the noise came from.

Radek walks into a door. ''(rolled 2 sanity)'' The strange thing is that the door wasn't there a moment ago. It's just an ordinary-looking door standing freely in the middle of the corridor. Nobody else can see it besides Greibel.

Greibel, on the other hand, starts glowing. ''(rolled 20 sanity)'' Everything seems miraculously clear to him, and he feels like he understands the cosmos perfectly.

Radek grumbles loudly, but then gets up and opens the door. It opens into a strange view of darkness. Pinpoints of light are scattered throughout it, and within, there is a sense of... presence.

AZIRAPHALE
Radek, what are you doing?

Everyone sort of stops around Radek and Greibel.

GREIBEL
Hey Radek, bet you wanna know what that strange view of darkness with the pinpoints and the presence is.

RADEK
Not as much as I'd like to stop hallucinating and find what we came here for.

GREIBEL
That's no hallucination. That's a whole other plane of existence. And the presence... 
(he puts his arm around Radek's shoulder)
That, my friend, is the spirit of the universe.

RADEK
Get your hands off of me.

Greibel does so.

THE GRAVEDIGGER
I smell fish. Also burning. And don't touch the grump, Greibel. He's grumpy.

GREIBEL
So I see. I also see the smells you smell.
The fish you smell are in the ocean. The burning is because this whole building incinerated.

Greibel sees other things, too - death, life, strange characters that aren't real... more bodies, a sea of colourful playroom balls...

AZIRAPHALE
Um, why are we stopping?

THE GRAVEDIGGER
Radek bumped into something. One of these things that aren't here.

RADEK
We aren't. Let's keep moving.

Radek shuts the door, which disappears as soon as the latch clicks.

THE GRAVEDIGGER
(loudly)
ONWARDS.

The Gravedigger leads them on, shovel and shield at the ready.
</screenplay>





<pre>
Apheori (GM): Okay.
So you all make it to the room, or what should be according to the map, but the door is locked.
Or maybe the mechanism isn't responding.
It won't open, at any rate.
The Gravedigger: IT'S HOLE TIME.
Frezak: I want to charge it with my shield.
Apheori (GM): Azira: The door wiggles at you suggestively.
Aziraphale looks at the door and then the other people
Apheori (GM): You can totally charge it with your shield.
Aziraphale: Er, guys, did you see that?
Apheori (GM): Guys: You don't know what he's talking about.
Frezak: Strength check with shield bonus?
Radek: Yes, I quite clearly saw this door, thank you.
The Gravedigger: Step back, guys.
Apheori (GM): Go for it.
Aziraphale mutters to himself but otherwise does nothing
Frezak:
rolling 1D20+5
(
13
)
+5
=
18
Apheori (GM): The door bends slightly.
Frezak: And again!
Apheori (GM): You made a dent.
Frezak:
rolling 1D20+5
(
20
)
+5
=
25
HOOOOOOOOLE
Apheori (GM): The dent is much bigger, and there's a gap by the edge of the frame where the door was bent away.
You can either pry it open or hit it again, but you might break something if you do the latter.
...such as yourself.
Frezak: Anyone have a prying device?
Crowbar or sword?
Greibel: I have a staff
Rhu: What about a shovel?
Aziraphale: I have a sword.
Greibel: That's kind of like a wooden crowbar
Rhu: Don't you have a shovel?
Frezak: SHovel has a wooden handle.
It's a shovel.
Radek: You're not touching my rifle.
Frezak: Against a metal door?
Nuh-uh.
Aziraphale: Should I try to pry it open with my sword?
Frezak: What's your Str?
Aziraphale: 18 +4 mod
Ganelon: I'm fairly sure it's 18.
Frezak: Sure, go ahead.
Ganelon: He's a paladin, and not the likable sort either.
Frezak: Unless anyone has a power that would work.
Wen: so what do I roll?
Rhu: Azira: The door wiggles at you again as you approahc.
Dammit, sorry.
Frezak: You're as bad as the hag, Names.
Apheori (GM): THE DOOR WIGGLES.
Frezak: Wiggly-wiggly.
Apheori (GM): Sorry.
Aziraphale approaches the door but hesitates
Greibel: I could turn into a something and fit through the gap and open it from the other end
Aziraphale: Um, guys, is it just me or is the door making indecent motions?
The Gravedigger: I tihnk it's you.
Are you on drugs?
Apheori (GM): Eh, roll with your strength mod, if you even want to get close to it.
Aziraphale rubs his eyes
Wen: is it continuing to wiggle?
Greibel: Do I see clearly what other people see for weird things still?
Rhu: Have you slept?
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You look and see it wiggling too.
It's stopping, though.
Greibel: Hey Azi, that door's totally wiggling
Aw, but not anymore
Apheori (GM): Okay, so do you pry it open?
Aziraphale: Um, are we sure we want to pry this open?
The Gravedigger: Yes?
Aziraphale: allright, here goes
Aziraphale approaches very cautiously
Aziraphale:
rolling 1d20 + 4
(
3
)
+4
=
7
Apheori (GM): The door comes open, but your sword gets ruined in the process, bent out of shape.
Wen: is there a way to talk OOC without using the mouse? something like /ooc message?
Apheori (GM): No idea.
Ganelon: Yes, but I'd have to find it.
I'll go looking.
Wen: never mind for now
The Gravedigger: Aw, crap, man.
Aziraphale: Do we go in?
The Gravedigger: Your sword.
Aziraphale: ...and can someone fix my sword?
The Gravedigger: Here, take this spade.
Aziraphale: I'm kind of attached to it.
Aziraphale sniffles but accepts the spade
Radek: Is it magical?
Wen: is it?
Ganelon: Very likely not.
Apheori (GM): Probably not any more than the basic enchantments to keep it solid.
Which apparently... failed.
Swords are not supposed to do that.
Frezak: Spade is a battleaxe, btw. Military versatile Axe, 1D10, prof 2.
Radek: Give it here. I might be able to do something.
Ganelon: Not quickly, mind you.
Aziraphale hands Radek the sword
Aziraphale: So do we go in?
Frezak: I'll head in first as the meatshield.
Check things look safe first.
Wen: oh, it _is_ just doing ooc
so /ooc whatever works
Apheori (GM): You head in. There's a dead guy in a wheely chair, apparently shot in the head.
Two other chairs are empty.
Frezak: From behind or in front?
The shot.
Apheori (GM): Mostly it's just an ordinary room with some monitors and consoles and a suspiciously large number of boxes of stale doughnuts in the corner.
Front.
Frezak: Expiry date on the donuts?
Just to tell how long they've been there.
Apheori (GM): None is listed.
There's also a shiny thing on the floor.
Frezak: SHINY.
Wen: EX shiny object
Aziraphale: Gravy: Is it safe for us to go in?
The Gravedigger: Just one dead guy.
Apheori (GM): It's a little butterfly pendant, a brilliant shade of blue.
Frezak: I'll give the dead guy a poke in case it moves.
I will take the shiny thing.
If I can before anyone else sees it.
Apheori (GM): The dead guy slides partially out of his chair.
Considering your size, methinks you can.
So you have a shiny little blue butterfly pendant.
Frezak: Awesome.
Ganelon: Loot!
Frezak: I'll put in a pouch for now.
I intend to show it to Radek later.
Wen: so I guess the rest of us just join him in the room?
Frezak: Right now I'll shuffle into a corner and let you guys do things.
Apheori (GM): Right. So you all pile in.
You're by the doughnuts. They smell like doughnuts.
It's kind of overpowering, in fact.
There are clearly a lot of doughnuts.
Aziraphale: Anybody want a doughnut?
Apheori (GM): Frazak: Roll a d20.
The Gravedigger: They look stale.
Radek: I don't eat anymore.
Frezak:
rolling 1D20
(
2
)
=
2
All these rolls are messing with my luck quotas.
Apheori (GM): The doughnut smell disappears and you suddenly realise most of the boxes are empty.
Greibel absentmindedly tries to bite what used to be a doughnut and now is air
Apheori (GM): Don't worry. Low rolls can actually have GOOD effects with these.
Aziraphale: ...Another illusion, eh?
Apheori (GM): Radek, Azi: You notice Greibel getting confused trying to eat a doughnut.
(You noticed nothing about it disappearing.)
Radek: Though I would advise you against believing everything Greibel says, he may be right about this. These aren't illusions.
This whole building is experiencing some sort of dimensional instability.
Frezak: I know!
We did hole science!
The Gravedigger: I know!
We did hole science!
Greibel: It took ghost donuts to convince you
Aziraphale: Greibel, the doughnut is stale. Best not eat it.
Greibel: Right...
Greibel tosses out the donut he no longer sees
Apheori (GM): One of the monitors flickers on.
Radek: Roll a d20.
Radek:
rolling 1d20
(
1
)
=
1
Frezak: You see a young girl, with long dark hair in front of her face.
She is wet.
Ganelon: I was actually wondering if I'd go from 3, to 2, and then to 1.
Apparently it was destined.
Apheori (GM): Radek: Everything explodes in horrible sound and you fall to the ground.
Wen: /me shakes fists at the RNG
Ganelon: Lovely!
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You hear the sound too, but not as badly: a buzzing roar, and feel like there is something else to it. A presense, a person...?
Aziraphale: do we notice that Radek fell to the ground?
Apheori (GM): It should be just outside, through that... er... wall.
Probably.
The Gravedigger: Radek?
Aziraphale goes over to Radek and examines him
Greibel: Hmmm
The Gravedigger pokes the Artificer.
Wen: does he look alive?
Ganelon: Does he ever?
Greibel rubs the wall
Apheori (GM): He looks miserable.
Greibel: Something's eating his brain or something
Apheori (GM): Radek: Roll again.
Greibel: Hey horsey dude, can you bust this wall?
Radek:
rolling 1d20
(
4
)
=
4
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You roll too.
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
20
)
=
20
\m/
Apheori (GM): Radek: The buzzing fades slightly, but you still can't do a whole lot.
Ganelon: These rolls are frighteningly consistent.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You walk through the wall.
Greibel: XD
Hey horsey dude! Never mind!
Apheori (GM): Radek: You see him do it.
Ganelon: I don't think I'm really in a state to do much about that.
Apheori (GM): Nope.
Azira may have seen it too.
Rhu and Gravy weren't looking that way, though.
Aziraphale: Hey guys, where did Greibel go?
He was near that wall... and then he was just gone.
The Gravedigger: This is all getting a bit silly.
Aziraphale: A bit?
A BIT?
The Gravedigger: Well, it was weird before.
Now it's just silly.
Greibel does a silly walk on the other side of the wall
Aziraphale: I had a wall chatting me up, a door making indecent motions at me and then the room explodes and a doped up guy walked through a wall. Oh, and I saw a potted plant eat someone's face, and a room full of fanged hams, and floors that weren't real.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You follow the sense into another room, on another floor. Before you, you see a girl, maybe human, maybe not. She looks lost, confused, and does not seem to see you.
Aziraphale babbles incoherently
The Gravedigger: You're on drugs.
You should sit down for a bit.
Wen: this is me breaking down and telling everything
that was in the backstory given to me
Rhu mentions having seen some rather odd things as well.
Apheori (GM): Wen: Don't announce that to everyone! Add to the mystery!
Greibel goes up to the girl cautiouslu
Wen: sorry >.>
Greibel: cautiously too
Apheori (GM): NAw, it's fine.
Frezak: I'll pick Radek up and put him in one of the chairs.
Lying around isn't gonna help.
Aziraphale takes a few deep breaths
Aziraphale: Okay, so what do we do now?
Apheori (GM): Greibel: She looks up and sees you. She's not human. In fact, you're not sure what she is - her eyes are a brilliant blue, glowing, even, and her face is alien like the models of the cenva you had seen as a child...
The Gravedigger: Well, I was hoping Radek would be able to poke at the city cameras.
Aziraphale: I suggest we get Radek somewhere marginally safe and try to find Greibel.
The Gravedigger: I have no idea what is safe.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: "I'm sorry," you hear her whisper.
Aziraphale: Well, can we improvise a stretcher?
The Gravedigger pokes the wall Greibel walked through.
Apheori (GM): Radek: You hear her too, but to you the voice is deafening.
The wall is solid.
The Gravedigger: I don't think it was anything physical.
It's probably just madness.
Greibel: What do you mean you're sorry? Are you lost?
Apheori (GM): Gravy, Radek: Roll a d20.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
18
)
=
18
The Gravedigger:
rolling 1D20
(
20
)
=
20
Ganelon: YES
LET IT END
Radek: Radek: You get better, and stuff. Yeah.
Frezak: Double crits, bitches.
Apheori (GM): Er.
Ganelon: Thank you, self.
Wen: XD
Apheori (GM): XD
Greibel: Roll d20.
Radek: Did one of you say something?
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
3
)
=
3
The Gravedigger: Before or after you fell over?
Radek: After.
Things became rather deafening.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: The girl suddenly gets very large, and changes, a form of immense light, gleaming in blackness. She screams, whatever she is, and dissappears.
The Gravedigger: Greibel walked through a wall.
Hmm.
Greibel: Well, that was fun.
The Gravedigger: HEY, GREIBEL.
GET BACK HERE
Bear Soup Guy: Did she leave anything behind?
Frezak: 18 con lungs, again.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: There's a pile of goop on the floor. You also realise you have no idea how to get back.
Frezak: You have a radio, you know.
Frezak: I also have 18 con lungs.
Apheori (GM): ...yes.
Frezak: RAdios are technology.
Apheori (GM): But there's a bunch of walls in the way.
Frezak: Lungs are closer at hand.
Apheori (GM): TECHNOLOGICAL walls.
Frezak: Ahhh, but the walls might not exist for him.
Wen: snrk
Apheori (GM): Greibel, roll a d20.
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
17
)
=
17
Apheori (GM): He doesn't hear you.
Greibel: XD
Frezak: I'll try the radio.
Apheori (GM): The radio spits out horrible buzzing.
The Gravedigger: Hey, stoner guy?
Greibel touches the goop cautiously
The Gravedigger: Aaaaah.
The Gravedigger turns off radio.
The Gravedigger: Well.
Bugger.
Apheori (GM): It looks like goop.
Greibel: It sticks to your hands and turns into a pair of really suspicious, weird gloves.
The Gravedigger: CAN you get anything off the cameras, RAdek?
Greibel: Woah, cool
Radek: Let's... have a look.
Apheori (GM): One of the screens is showing a boot screen, stuck on network connect.
Aziraphale: That was happening to me too
The computers that worked couldn't connect.
Couldn't call anyone either. Networks all down.
Ganelon: Connecting to the building's security network, or something larger in scale?
Apheori (GM): The main network. You could try to get it to only do a local connect to the rest ofthe building.
Ganelon: I would like to try that.
Aziraphale: They'd turn on, work for a bit, flicker, and then shut down.
Apheori (GM): Roll something appropriate and fiddle with it, smart person.
Radek:
rolling 1d20+10
(
12
)
+10
=
22
Greibel , meanwhile, is wandering looking at his hands
Apheori (GM): Radek: You get the computer up with connectivity to the rest of the building.
Greibel: Roll a d20.
Radek: There. Let's see if the cameras are still operational.
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
19
)
=
19
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You see absolutely nothing unusual.
Radek: You find the cameras without trouble, with both live feeds on some, and logs available as well.
Ganelon: His "gloves" are gone?
Apheori (GM): He can't SEE them.
Wen: Radek: Do a /etc/init.d/network restart
/me runs
Apheori (GM) hits Wen with a frying pan.
Ganelon: In the interest of getting out of this building as soon as possible, I'd like to just download any recorded footage from these cameras and check it out somewhere less maddening.
Apheori (GM): You download what you can get.
Aziraphale: Radek: Anything useful?
Radek: Maybe. You'll excuse me for not wanting to sit around viewing it in here.
Apheori (GM): (It's a few months' worth of stuff.)
Aziraphale: So let's try to find Greibel and get the heck out of here.
Ganelon: Is he in view of any cameras?
Apheori (GM): You check the current feeds.
Looks like he's wandering down a corridor labelled 'pheasant'.
He's also walking through objects.
Radek points at the screen. "Done."
Apheori (GM): Some broken furniture, a few bodies, buckets of paint...
A... chicken?
The Gravedigger: A live chicken?
Ganelon: Oh no.
Frezak: OOC
Ganelon: A rubber one.
Rhu: It looks dead, but it's moving.
Frezak: Ew.
Rhu: Are chickens supposed to do that?
Wen: judging from the map, can we reach him?
...without going through walls
Apheori (GM): Greibel, Azi: Roll a d20.
Aziraphale:
rolling 1d20
(
19
)
=
19
Ganelon: Another question: is there a speaker system?
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
20
)
=
20
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You greet the swarm of undead chickens.
Gan: Probably. You should be able to access it from here.
Greibel: Ah, the chickens.
I knew this day would come.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: The chickens flock around you and rub against your legs in a friendly fashion.
Ganelon: One last question: can we hear him or is this communication strictly one-way?
Apheori (GM): Roll when figuring it out.
Greibel: Maybe you chickens can tell me how to get back to the room with the dead guy in it?
Ganelon: ...Wait, what?
Greibel: I do speak chicken, after all.
Apheori (GM): Gan: The system.
Ganelon: You want me to roll again, then?
Apheori (GM): Greibel: The chickens squack in confusion. Apparently in their dead state they forgot chicken themselves.
Gan: Right.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20+10
(
4
)
+10
=
14
Greibel: Ah, to be expected
Greibel pets the chickens for a bit
Apheori (GM): Okay, you figure out how to use the intercom, and the remote speakers seem to respond as well.
Ganelon: Excellent
Radek: Hey, Greibel.
What the hell are you doing?
Apheori (GM): Greibel: Radek's voice echos around you, spooking the chickens.
They run away in every direction.
Greibel: =O
Thanks Grumpy! You spooked the chickens!
Radek: And you disappeared. Do you even know where you are?
Greibel: Well...no, can't say as I do.
Where are you?
Radek: Where you /left me/, along with everyone else.
The Gravedigger: HEY GREIBEL
Greibel: Hi Gravy!
Also, I went to go meet that girl who was making noises.
She blew up though.
Aziraphale: A girl?
Aziraphale wonders if it's his cousin
Greibel: Yeah, she looked sort of alien, with blue eyes
Super blue eyes
Radek: (To the others): I heard... something like that.
Aziraphale: Like what?
Radek: A girl.
Aziraphale: Hmm.
Greibel: She told me she was sorry, guys.
The Gravedigger: You people are all going insane.
Greibel: But like, then she kind of blew up, like I said
Rhu:
rolling 1d20
(
14
)
=
14
Radek: If you could just abandon the thought that this place exists in only one fixed state at a given point in time, this would make much more sense to you, Gravedigger.
The Gravedigger: Says the man who hears ghost girls and fall over because of mysterious sounds.
Apheori (GM): Gravy: Roll d20.
The Gravedigger:
rolling 1D20
(
4
)
=
4
Apheori (GM): Greibel: You too.
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
19
)
=
19
Radek: Allow me to pose you a riddle: what do you get when there is both a hole and not a hole occupying the same space?
The Gravedigger: You don't.
Holes are or they aren't.
Trust me.
I know holes.
Radek: Yet here we are.
Rhu: Holes in what?
Ganelon: I'd like to give Greibel some instructions to lead him back over here. Is that possible?
Apheori (GM): Yeah.
Let's just say you do it and he comes back.
The Gravedigger: If I was hearing ghost voices and you weren't you'd be calling me crazy.
Apheori (GM): But he has to roll a d20 on the way.
Ganelon: So many d20s.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: ROLL A d20.
Radek: Holes in reality.
Leading to other realities.
Aziraphale: Sounds like a book I read. Something about cutting through reality with a dagger.
Apheori (GM): Greibel. Roll.
Ganelon: ...Is anyone else familiar with this story he's talking about?
Apheori (GM): Might be. Probably would have read it as a child, so it depends on your backstory.
Wen: it's His Dark Materials >.> I'm just killing time while waiting for BSG
it's not meant to be part of canon
Apheori (GM): Shush. It can be a story here too.
Wen: sorry
Apheori (GM): Bah, screw it. *takes over Greibel*
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
17
)
=
17
Ganelon: Well, given the age difference, I'm guessing that unless it's a very classic story, Radek was no child when it was published.
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
3
)
=
3
Apheori (GM): Okay, Greibel makes it back to the rest of you based on Radek's direction, but he thinks he's a chicken and he wants to go back and rejoin the swarm now.
Radek: Do any of you want to use this terminal for something else?
Apheori (GM): Frezak vanished.
Aziraphale: I think we'd better leave this room, if not this building.
Ganelon: That happens a lot when birds roost on his... satellite dish?
Apheori (GM): >.<
Where's bear soup guy?
The Gravedigger: Yeah, let's get some fresh air.
Radek: Wait.
Apheori (GM): Should we wait to actually do that until his return?
Ganelon: It would be nice.
Wen: someone ping him on skype?
Ganelon: But first I want to break open this tech and scavenge the pieces.
Apheori (GM): You get... a bunch of pieces!
...I know nothing about the mechanics of your class or what pieces you want, so you can figure it out.
Ganelon: Just give me a "money" value worth of mechanical junk.
Like... let me give you a comparison to help.
Apheori (GM): I don't know what he money is. >.<
Ganelon: Okay.
A dagger is 1 GP, a longsword is 15, a suit of very heavy armor is 50.
Apheori (GM): You get a decent-value worth of stuff and a dead rodent you found in one of the cases.
Ganelon: Very basic magical stuff is 360.
Greibel: SORRY I'M BACK
Apheori (GM): It looks like a squirrel.
Ganelon: One clockwork bomb can be made from 40.
That's probably the most relevant number.
Apheori (GM): Call it about 200.
The Gravedigger: WoW.
Ganelon: Lovely. Thank you.
Apheori (GM): And a dead squirrel.
Frezak: That's a lot of stuffs.
Ganelon: It's not useful for anything other than alchemy, though.
Apheori (GM): Greiebel: You're convinced you're an undead chicken and you want to rejoin your swarm, but you found your way back to the others.
Frezak: Computers are full of stuffs.
Ganelon: Unlike the RAW STUFF OF MAGIC which I will probably be stockpiling too.
Greibel pecks at Radek
Radek: Gah!
Frezak: Gravy will just pick Greibel up.
Radek: Thank you.
Frezak: And lift him above his head.
Greibel clucks madly
Apheori (GM): Azira: d20
Aziraphale:
rolling 1d20
(
13
)
=
13
Frezak: I'll shake him vigourously until he calms down.
Apheori (GM): Azira: You suddenly get this feeling he's a chicken as well, but know it ain't right.
Frezak: It doesn't seem to help.
Aziraphale looks at Greibel in a puzzled manner
Aziraphale: ...Um, guys, I think we'd better just get out of here quickly.
There's some... influence here.
The Gravedigger: GREAT IDEA.
Aziraphale: If we have all the data and stuff we want, let's go.
Rhu: Best idea.
Wen: do we leave by the door?
Radek: Agreed.
Wen: do we have any trouble exiting through the bent and indecent door?
Greibel clucks in vague affirmation
Apheori (GM): Naw, the door poses no trouble.
Ganelon: I've half a mind to jump out the nearest ground-floor window at this point.
Rhu: What about the ship?
Will it even be there?
Aziraphale: Good idea to check, I think? It'd certainly be safer than any place I'd been during the past few days.
Apheori (GM): It's just that it was going crazy.
Rhu: It's just that it was going crazy.
Apheori (GM): Blarg.
The Gravedigger: Tell it it makes nice sandwiches.
Aziraphale: If it has communication devices you can also tell outsiders what you've found.
Greibel clucks at the word sandwiches
The Gravedigger: Radek has a thingy for that.
Rhu: We should report in, yeah.
Aziraphale: At any rate, I'd feel safer in something not affixed to this place. At the very least, outside of the building.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: Roll a d20.
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
11
)
=
11
Apheori (GM): Azir, Gravedigger: You too.
Aziraphale:
rolling 1d20
(
14
)
=
14
Frezak:
rolling 1D20
(
7
)
=
7
Apheori (GM): Azi: You manage to shake the impression that Greibel is a chicken.
Aziraphale is relieved
Apheori (GM): Azira and the Gravedigger: You hear something strange. Like some sort of twisting and cracking.
The guy who thinks he's a chicken may hear it too, but it wouldn't mean anything to him.
Rhu:
rolling 1d20
(
2
)
=
2
Aziraphale: Did you guys hear that?
Rhu starts screaming.
Aziraphale: I think we really should leave this place as soon as possible.
The Gravedigger: Some thing, breaking?
Oh, Rhu? You too?
Aziraphale: Possibly. Certainly nothing good.
Let's grab the insane ones and go.
Rhu: Broken, broken, broken, twisting, breaking, broken.
The Gravedigger: I can't carry both of you.
CAn you carry take Rhu, Azi?
Aziraphale: Yes.
The Gravedigger: Great.
Don't go insane, RAdek, or you're being dragged.
Onwards!
Radek: I don't plan to.
Ganelon: Onwards.
Wen: do we make it safely out of the building?
Apheori (GM): You charge down the hall and up the stairs.
Everyone roll.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
13
)
=
13
Aziraphale:
rolling 1d20
(
13
)
=
13
Rhu:
rolling 1d20
(
10
)
=
10
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
14
)
=
14
Wen: /me pokes Greibel
The Gravedigger:
rolling 1D20
(
7
)
=
7
Apheori (GM): Azira: You stumble at the noise. Now you can see it too.
Rhu recovers slightly but not very much.
Greibel also recovers slightly and gets confused.
A stream of water comes down the stairs - not enough to carry any of you off your feet, but enough to at least get your feet wet.
The Gravedigger: THE FISH.
Greibel: Hmmmm wet....wet....mumble
Wen: what do I see?
Apheori (GM): Things... twisting, crunching. It affects your balance.
Wen: I think we just keep running?
Unless we can't.
Apheori (GM): You all keep running! You make it back to the lobby full of bodies.
The fish you saw before is now completely rotted, as though it had been sitting out for days, perhaps weeks. There is a horrible, partly dry puddle around it.
The Gravedigger: Well, that's not great.
Frezak: is the stoner still struggling?
Apheori (GM): Also the swarm of chickens apparently followed you.
Stoner: Roll!
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
7
)
=
7
Apheori (GM): The stoner is completely out of it now.
The Gravedigger: Aw, hell. Chickens!
Apheori (GM): Everyone roll!
Aziraphale:
rolling 1d20
(
9
)
=
9
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
8
)
=
8
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20
(
3
)
=
3
The Gravedigger:
rolling 1D20
(
17
)
=
17
Rhu:
rolling 1d20
(
5
)
=
5
Apheori (GM): Eeer.
Aziraphale, Rhu: It feels like reality is falling apart at the seams. Things are twisting, pulling, rocking.
Greibel: You're a chicken.
Greibel clucks confusedly
Ganelon: He should just Wild Shape into one.
Save us the confusion.
Apheori (GM): Radek: Things are shifting oddly and there are some odd noises, but you're more or less on top of it.
Gravedigger: You're firmly rooted in reality. Congratulations.
The Gravedigger groans.
The Gravedigger: WHY ARE YOU PEOPLE ALL FUCKING INSANE.
Apheori (GM): Greibel turns into a swarm of chickens.
Wen: what can we do other than run like hell at this point?
Apheori (GM): He heads toward the sopping wet undead chickens.
You can... stop Greibel.
Frezak: HOW?
Apheori (GM): Greibel: Roll a d20.
I have no idea.
Greibel SWARMS AROUND THE SWARM OF OTHER SWARMERS
Frezak: Wellll.
Aziraphale grabs one of the chickens
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
19
)
=
19
Frezak: If he's a Swarm, then he's once creature.
I'd like to make a Grab attack.
Apheori (GM): Greibel comes to his senses.
Frezak: Oh, good.
Apheori (GM): Make your grab.
Greibel: oik
Apheori (GM): You don't know he's come to his senses.
That still stands.
Frezak:
rolling 1D20+4
(
14
)
+4
=
18
Vs... what, Gan?
Ref?
Ganelon: Yes.
Greibel: Ref is 12
Apheori (GM): You manage to grab him.
Frezak: I have most likely grabbed the swarm.
Apheori (GM): The undead chickens take this as a sign of hostility and attack.
Frezak: By just scooping them um with my shield and shovel.
Dustpan-style.
Oh, crap.
The Gravedigger: WATCH OUT
CHICKENS
Ganelon: Thundering Armor!
Greibel: Oh no, the undead chickens!
Ganelon: I wish to make Gravy's armor repel chickens.
Rhu: Run!
Apheori (GM): ...sure.
Greibel agrees with Rhu
Ganelon: It's actually a power - just a push 1 away from him on a single target.
Greibel ans also is probably an elf again?
Ganelon: And it makes his armor a little better for a while.
Apheori (GM): Greibel: If you turned into an elf, you're an elf.
Frezak: Are we in initiative?
Greibel: Okay, I did
Apheori (GM): Okay.
I don't know at this point.
What happens now, knowledgeable people?
Bear Soup Guy: CHICKEN BATTLE
Ganelon: Is this a fight?
Frezak: If it's a /fight/, then we roll initiative.
Apheori (GM): It... could be. I don't know how fights work.
Frezak: it's a monster, right?
Apheori (GM): What if you all try to run away? Would it still be a fight?
Frezak: Ehhhh.
Ganelon: It could be or not be a fight.
Apheori (GM): The chickens decided to attack. Other than that it's up in the air.
Frezak: Then it's gonna be initiatives.
And we can try to run on our turns.
Or somethign >.>
Ganelon: Rolling init.
Apheori (GM): ...sure.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
2
)
=
2
Frezak: Initiative
6
Ganelon: Here's a cool R20 feature for you lot.
He's got it figured out already, I see.
Frezak: I made a macro thing.
Ganelon: Select your token and type /roll 1d20+(whatever your initiative mod is) .
Wen: I don't have one I think
Frezak: You have Azi, Wen.
Ganelon: Then type "& {tracker}" without the space before those brackets.
Apheori (GM): Frezak: Can you make a chicken token?
Frezak: >.>
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1D20+0
(
7
)
+0
=
7
Apheori (GM): It doesn't need to look like chickens.
Just... so there's something there.
Wen: so it's... 0?
that's what it says under INIT
Ganelon: http://www.videogamesartwork.com/sites/default/files/images/image/1377110134/guildwars2_creatures_undead_chicken_concept_art_by_brian_lawver.jpg
Boom.
Apheori (GM): Wen: Right.
Ganelon: Thank you Guild Wars 2 for undead Orrian chickens.
Frezak: CHICKEN.
Apheori (GM): Hee.
Aziraphale:
rolling 1d20
(
16
)
=
16
Bear Soup Guy: AH CHICKEN
Wen: ...wait what o_O
Rhu:
rolling 1d20 + 2
(
9
)
+2
=
11
Bear Soup Guy: I rolled a 7 by the way ^^^
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 + 4
(
4
)
+4
=
8
Wen: am I supposed to do something at this point? >.>
Apheori (GM): Good question.
GUYS.
Oh, wait, it's up to you.
Fight or run?
Bear Soup Guy: We lost Frezak D=
Aziraphale: Do we try to fend of the fiendish fowl, or do we flee for our er, faces?
fend off*
Ganelon: Does Apheori have monster stats for a horde of undead chickens?
Apheori (GM): I think so.
Ganelon: Well, let's wait on Frezak for now.
Aziraphale: brb bathroom
Wen: er, OOC
not sure where that would be in game >.>
Bear Soup Guy: Aziraphale was /very/ afraid of the chickens :>
Wen: hee
Apheori (GM): So if folks try to run away, how do we handle that?
Ganelon: Put an exit point on the map for us to reach?
Apheori (GM): Like that?
Ganelon: I suppose?
That's rather close, though. People can move 6 squares per action.
And 12 if they aren't attacking on the same turn. 16 if they choose to run.
Apheori (GM): There.
Bear Soup Guy: masterfully drawn
Aziraphale: So er, do we fight the patient chicken?
Or do we try to run?
Frezak: Right.
i'll need some moments to load pictures >.>
Dude.
Gravy has never buried a swarm of undead chickens.
THis is Blong, God of Shovels, bringing him a gift.
Apheori (GM): You mean Amri Dan?
Well, here's the thing - Azira is up first. So he can do whatever.
WHATEVER.
Right?
That is how it works.
Right?
Ganelon: Basically.
Wen: but do we try to run?
and how hard is it to kill the chicken?
Ganelon: Can't know right now.
Apheori (GM): Pick one.
Greibel: CHICKEN BATTLE
Aziraphale looks around at everyone else
Apheori (GM): You can run. You can attack. You can cower.
Frezak: I vote for smitage.
Apheori (GM): You can stand around confused.
You can try to grab Radek and run.
Wen: Do I have my sword back?
Apheori (GM): No.
But you have a spade.
Aziraphale: Okay, let's fight this thing.
Wen: so do I choose one of my at-will powers and do a roll based on that?
Apheori (GM): Guys, don't die.
Seriously, if you die here, you're screwed.
Also reality is still being freakishly warped and crap.
Frezak: You're a paladin, right?
Apheori (GM): With lots of horrible noises.
Wen: HALP >.> so one minor action and one standard action, right? And I just pick two, and do two rolls based on the the descriptions. Did I get that right?
Ganelon: You get a standard, move, and minor.
Standards can become moves and moves can become minors.
So you could do three minors in one turn if you wanted, but it would be a pretty big waste.
Wen: so do I just say what action I'm taking and roll?
Ganelon: Well, you'll most likely need to be in range of the chickens first.
Wen: If it's melee, I need to be adjacent, correct?
Apheori (GM): What does this swarm attack aura 1 mean?
Frezak: Means that it has an aura radiatin 1 square from it's edges.
Apheori (GM): Is that always there, or what?
Frezak: yep.
Apheori (GM): Chicken aura!
Wen: okay, so first I move.. Tell me if I'm doing it wrong
Frezak: wait, there's a thing for auras.
Apheori (GM): You have a gun, too.
Oh, neat.
Frezak: There, secret GM aura.
Apheori (GM): Okay, so you moved. Now you can do a standard action and a minor.
Wen: so say if I want to use Holy Strike, I first roll a 1d20 + 7 for attack and then if it works, damage?
Frezak: if the card says +7, then yep.
Ganelon: Most likely +6, since your weapon changed.
Wen: okay, here goes
Aziraphale:
rolling 1d20 + 6
(
20
)
+6
=
26
Frezak: Niiiice
Ganelon: Well, that's a crit.
Frezak: max damage!
Aziraphale: damage = 12 then.
Apheori (GM): Should it do extra damage since it's like holy or something on an undead mass?
Ganelon: Damage is 14.
Frezak: What damage DOES Holy Strike do?
Ganelon: Because you're using an "axe".
Frezak: Keywords?
Ganelon: I'm guessing 1[W] + str (4).
And yeah, is it radiant damage?
Wen: it is
Ganelon: Undead tend to hate that.
Frezak: Then it should take an extra 5 damage from radiant.
Wen: plus bonus equal to wisdom mod (+3) if marked target
Not sure what "marked" means..
Frezak: I think that's part of your... Divine Challenge?
Ganelon: Yes.
All Defender classes can apply marks.
Apheori (GM): Since that's a minor action, you could have done that too.
Do you want to tack it in?
Ganelon: A generic mark means that the marked target gets a -2 to hit if it makes an attack that does not include you as a target.
Wen: oh
Ganelon: A paladin's mark does something extra.
Wen: Urgh, yeah, tack that on
so it's [W] + str (+4) +3 for marked + whatever due to crit and different weapon and radiant
...can someone sort that out?
Frezak: battleaxe is 1D10, soo
10+4+3+5.
22.
Wen: whoo!
Apheori (GM): Neat!
Frezak: BUT.
It's a swarm.
Apheori (GM): Oh.
Frezak: It takes half damage from Ranged and Melee attacks.
Apheori (GM): What does that do?
Wen: does the +5 come from crit or radiant?
Apheori (GM): Ah.
Frezak: Radiant.
Ganelon: Radiant.
Crits deal bonus damage when you have magic weapons.
Frezak: Crit is just max damage unless you have a magical or High Crit weapon.
Ganelon: Right, yes, that too.
Frezak: And Marked.
Wen: okay, so damage is 11?
Frezak: Yup.
Wen: it looks like marked makes the chicken take hits when attacking, not when attacked.
Frezak: Yep.
Ganelon: Yes, except with Holy Strike.
Apheori (GM): Oh gods Rhu's character sheet is horrific.
Ganelon: Yes it is.
I volunteer Frezak to make it readable later.
Apheori (GM): Can someone PLEASE reformat it for me at some point?
Like, remake it.
Completely.
Ganelon: Because I did two already.
Frezak: Sure, i'll do that.
At some point >.>
Apheori (GM): In the meantime can you play Rhu because I can't read this?
Wen: WHOO I FINISHED A TURN.
>.>
Frezak: I don't have his (bad) sheet.
And I don't have the webs to load it.
Apheori (GM): What's a whirlwind charge?
Frezak: No idea.
Apheori (GM): Er.
Gan? Can you figure this out? >.>
Frezak: Okay, power names and stat distribution, please.
Ganelon: I can't see it either.
Apheori (GM): That's the problem - I HAVE NO IDEA.
Frezak: JUST THE NAMES.
WHirlwind Charge is an Encounter power.
Apheori (GM): http://dump.zaori.org/Rhu.pdf
Frezak: GAH.
Apheori (GM): Gan: ^
Melee Basic Attack: By weapon, damage 1[W] [standard action]
Ranged Basic Attack: By weapon, damage 1[W]+2 [dexterity bonus] [standard action]
Bull Rush: +0 [base strength attack] vs fortitude [standard action]
Grab: +0 [base strength attack] vs reflex [standard action]
Move grabbed target: +0 [base strength attack] vs fortitude [standard action]
Apheori (GM): Escape: +7 [acrobatics] vs reflex / +0 [athletics] vs fortitude [move action]
Bond of Retribution [Level 1]
Radiant Vengeance [Level 1]
That mess?
Frezak: His ability scores?
Okay, so.
Apheori (GM): Strength
10 (+0)
Constitution 12 (+1)
Dexterity
15 (+2)
Intelligence 14 (+2)
Apheori (GM): Wisdom
19 (+4)
Charisma
8 (-1)
Frezak: He will.... swear an oath of enmity on the swarm.
Then he'll move.
And charge using WHirlwing Charge.
Since the only enemy adjacent to him is his oath dude, he rolls twice.
rolling 1D20+7
(
3
)
+7
=
10
rolling 1D20+7
(
6
)
+7
=
13
Frezak: He'll pick the higher number.
WHich still misses.
Unless the swarm has 13 AC.
Apheori (GM): Nope.
>.<
Frezak: he will be sad.
And end his turn.
Apheori (GM): Thank you.
So the chickens...
The chickens try to flow all over Aziraphale.
What does necrotic mean?
Frezak: It deals Necrotic damage.
Ganelon: Nothing unless he's vulnerable or resistant to it.
Frezak: If Az has either resist or vulnerable necrotic, things happen.
Otherwise, nothing special.
Other than a sense of ickyness.
Ganelon: The only way a level 1 character can be resistant to it without magic equipment is if they're a vampire, though.
Wen: so I'm in trouble?
Ganelon: Eh, damage is damage.
Radek can fix you up.
Apheori (GM): You're probably going to be icky.
Ganelon: He can even fix ickiness.
Frezak: It'll have -2 to hit because of the mark.
Ganelon: And other forms of filth.
...Eh? It's attacking the guy who marked it.
Frezak: oh, right >.>
I thought it was Rhu.
JUST ROLL AND IGNORE ME
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 + 4
(
11
)
+4
=
15
Awwww.
Wen: no
Frezak: Vs fort.
Wen: as the target, I'm damaged
Apheori (GM): Yeah, it failed.
Wen: \o/
Frezak: What's Az's fort? O.o
Wen: 16
Frezak: cripes.
Ganelon: Lucky you.
Hey, Lhoryn has 18. It's not that unheard of.
Wen: the divine challenge thingy only reduces damage if the targets don't include me
Greibel: BRB BECAUSE MY SISTER'S DOGS JUST WENT FUCKING INSANE AND ATTACKED EACH OTHER
Ganelon: Sounds serious
Apheori (GM): It's greibel's turn.
Frezak: >.>
Wen: >.<
Apheori (GM): So hopefully the dog won't do anything too bad.
Frezak: <.<
Apheori (GM): Oh, buggrit, I forgot to have you all roll sanity checks.
Everyone roll a d20!
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
2
)
=
2
Rhu:
rolling 1d20
(
15
)
=
15
Ganelon: I don't believe in chickens.
Frezak:
rolling 1D20
(
8
)
=
8
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
2
)
=
2
Aziraphale:
rolling 1d20
(
6
)
=
6
Apheori (GM) cacjles.
Apheori (GM): Cackling, even.
Okay, Azira, you think the chicken swarm got you even though it didn't. This may or may not have any real impact on anything.
Aziraphale: Ow.
Apheori (GM): Radek, Greibel: Reality seems to be shaking itself apart. Now the chickens are still there, but it's really... crazy.
Gravedigger: You're going to get to bury a swarm of chickens. It's going to be awesome.
Frezak: FUCK YEAAAAAHHHHH
Glad to be Gravy.
Apheori (GM): Should we just play for Greibel for now?
Note that he's going crazy.
Frezak: Gaaaaaan!
Ganelon: Uh.
Frezak: Throw some crap and run in circles.
Ganelon: Fire Hawk!
rolling 1d20+4
(
15
)
+4
=
19
Reflex.
Apheori (GM): Yeah.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d8+4
(
7
)
+4
=
11
Single target, so half that, and the hawk is watching this swarm of chickens carefully.
Meaning it gets to make opportunity attacks against them.
And if the place is really looking that bad, I suppose he'd like to flee.
To there, if you please.
That is all.
Apheori (GM): Thankee.
Frezak: Gravy will give the swarm a calculating look.
Apheori (GM): These chickens are going to feel shovelled.
Frezak: Then, twirling his shovel, walk to here.
Wen: Is there any strategic advantage to some of the party fleeing but others staying to fight?
Apheori (GM): Wen: Congratulations: Your first attack in a DnD thing was... WITH A SHOVEL.
Wen: \o/
Frezak: Ranged dudes want to stay away.
Ganelon: The good news is that I can easily fix your sword when we have time and are not going insane.
Wen: I see.
Frezak: I will charge, I think.
Goring Charge!
rolling 1D20+9
(
17
)
+9
=
26
Vs AC.
Apheori (GM): Yup.
Frezak:
rolling 1D6+4
(
3
)
+4
=
7
And it's prone.
Imagine that I just batted a bunch away and they're trying to regroup.
It is now raining undead chickens.
i'll use a free action to supersede Azi's mark with my own.
And end my turn.
Aziraphale glares
Wen: so combat actions are supposed to be done OOC?
Ganelon: "Pay attention to me!"
"No! I'm the bigger threat!"
Frezak: Read your power.
You still get your burning bonus.
Apheori (GM): Wen: Works either way.
But generally speaking as your character you're... well, speaking.
As your character.
Ganelon: I just prefer to describe actions during combat like this.
Radek does not call out his attacks.
Wen: okay.
The Gravedigger: BEHOLD THE DIGGER OF YOUR GRAVE.
Ganelon: So here's a rules question, Frezak.
The Gravedigger: YOUR HOLE AWAIS
Frezak: *awaits >.>
Ganelon: Do my weird burst powers get halved damage?
The ones that target single enemies using bursts.
Frezak: let's see.
Ganelon: Also, do they get a penalty because of prone chickens?
Frezak: Hmm.
Ganelon: I mean, they're... sort of ranged?
Frezak: It's a single target burst.
So it's a burst, nor ranged or melee.
Ganelon: Does that mean they're vulnerable to it?
Frezak: And prone, as I understand, won't have any effect on it.
Umm.
Yes, I suppose.
no
Um.
>.>
Frezak: Mechanically, it does look like a burst.
It's a close burst, what more.
So... yes.
Ganelon: Then you get an Ethereal Chill.
[Implement Attack]
rolling 1d20+5+0
(
3
)
+5+0
=
8
Or not.
Frezak: gah.
Ganelon: Move to here and end my turn.
Apheori (GM): Radek: You trip on a corpse and fall on your face.
Frezak: what;
Apheori (GM): He rolled a 2.
Frezak: RAAADEEEEEEK
Apheori (GM) points up.
Apheori (GM): Actually I'm not sure if it was a corpse or not. But whatever.
He tripped on SOMETHING that wasn't there.
Ganelon: I'm prone. Turn ends regardless.
Frezak: A less mobile dead chicken.
Okay, so here's the cool thing.
For starting next to the swarm, the swarm gets a free peck at Azi.
BUT.
Since /I/ have it marked, I get a slam as an interrupt to that attack.
SO i'll start.
Frezak: With WARDEN'S FURY.
rolling 1D20+6+2
(
18
)
+6+2
=
26
rolling 1D10+4
(
4
)
+4
=
8
And it grants Combat Advantage until the end of my next turn.
Now it can peck the paladin.
Apheori (GM): Azira: roll 1d20
Before you do anything else.
Wen:
rolling 1d20
(
15
)
=
15
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Bear Soup Guy: Okay, I'm back, sorry
I'm dog-sitting
Apheori (GM): Frezak: Was that 8 damage or less than 8?
Bear Soup Guy: And one of the dogs is an idiot
Ganelon: Sitting on dogs?
Frezak: It's half 8 >.>
Wen: are the dogs all alive still?
Bear Soup Guy: Yeah, one of them just got a bloodied nose
Unfortunately not the stupid antagonistic one >_<
Apheori (GM): Frezak: What's a basic attck?
Frezak: Any attack with a circle around the symbol.
Swarm of Beaks for this guy.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 + 6
(
5
)
+6
=
11
Azi: Go.
Wen: okay
Frezak: SMITE IT.
Wen: I'm going to move next to Gravy
Apheori (GM): Oh, and everyone else, roll a d20.
Frezak:
rolling 1D20
(
7
)
=
7
Bear Soup Guy:
rolling 1d20
(
11
)
=
11
Wen: and use a forbidding strike
rolling 1d20 + 6
(
5
)
+6
=
11
...does that hit?
Apheori (GM): Against ac?
No.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
5
)
=
5
Wen: yes
argh
okay, so minor action
Rhu:
rolling 1d20
(
11
)
=
11
Wen: what is a "day" in game time?
(for the daily actions)
Ganelon: 6 hours of rest gets them back.
Uninterrupted rest.
Wen: er.
is it a bad idea to use a daily action at this stage?
Ganelon: Well, what time is it on Sarathi?
Apheori (GM): Probably evening.
You've been tromping around all day.
Ganelon: Then you can probably get away with using it.
Apheori (GM): And now you're all losing your minds.
Ganelon: As we'll sleep soon regardless.
Apheori (GM): If you don't lose your minds first.
Wen: actually it'd be useless, since I already did my attack this turn.
Ganelon: Not so.
You have an ACTION POINT!
Which is to say, all characters have one action point at the start of each day and get one more after every two fights.
Wen: so I can have one extra attack?
Ganelon: And you may spend one per round to get an extra standard action on your turn.
Which you can use for whatever you want.
Wen: err okay
so I use Divine Strength (+4 on next attack)
and again do a Forbidding Strike using the action point
rolling 1d20 + 6
(
5
)
+6
=
11
Bear Soup Guy: Okay guys I think I have to go
Wen: ...that still isn't enough, right?
Bear Soup Guy: Because more dog stuff
Wen: >.<
good luck BSG.
Bear Soup Guy: Thanks
>_<
Ganelon: Hm.
Wen: well, there goes my turn anyway
Ganelon: Can Rhu not give people a reroll?
Wen: what's the swarm's AC anyway?
Apheori (GM): 15
Ganelon: Oh, also, you had combat advantage for this attack (+2 to hit)
Apheori (GM): And dude, you're all elves. You should get a free re-roll anyway, no?
Ganelon: Not at all.
Frezak: What mechanical race is Azi?
Ganelon: Human.
Wen: er
Ganelon: (Nissai)
Wen: isn't that a kind of elf?
Frezak: Then it's just Greibel that has Elven Accuracy.
Apheori (GM): Rhu does too according to his thing.
Ganelon: There are kinds of elves in 4E that don't have Elven Accuracy.
Eladrin, Drow, and Half-Elves don't, for instance.
It's only available to a specific kind.
Apheori (GM): Ah.
Meh, just keep beating on this thing so it all dies, will y'all?
Ganelon: But Rhu can Channel Divinity to give someone else a reroll against his oath target, I think.
Apheori (GM): If he can, can you make it happen?
I plead confusion.
Ganelon: Am I mistaken, Frezak?
Frezak: yeah he can give one reroll per encounter.
Best not waste it on an at-will >.>
Apheori (GM): Okay, moving on.
Does Rhu get attacked by chickens too?
Frezak: yup
Ganelon: Do you get to punish them for it, or is that a 1/round deal?
Apheori (GM): Does the guy who marked it get to smack it again?
What he said.
Frezak: Did Azy reapply his mark?
Wen: No.
so it's still your mark.
Frezak: Then he just has -2 to hit.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 + 4
(
4
)
+4
=
8
Ganelon: Shame on you, chickens.
Apheori (GM): So Gan... what does Rhu do?
Frezak: Um.
Ganelon: I don't know!
Frezak: He will shift 1.
Ganelon: I'm already playing Greibel!
Apheori (GM): Oh.
Frezak: And thennnn.
Apheori (GM): Okay. >.>
Frezak: Radiant Vengeance.
Apheori (GM): I only slightly mixed you guys up!
Frezak: wait, no >.>
Apheori (GM): Whatever that is.
Frezak: Bond Of Retribution.
Ellemerr: Who is Rhu? Should I play Rhu? I don't think I'd be a very good Rhu. *shifty eyes* If Lokshmi comes back I could give it a try!
Frezak: Vengeance is ranged.
Retributionising.
rolling 1D20+8
(
3
)
+8
=
11
Apheori (GM): You'd be an excellent Lokshmi, but she ain't coming back.
Frezak:
rolling 1D20+8
(
19
)
+8
=
27
Ellemerr: Aaaaaw
Frezak: I WILL TAKE THE SECOND ROLL I THINK.
rolling 2D6+4
(
3
+
4
)
+4
=
11
Radiant, so 16.
And halved because swarm.
and that's it for him.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 + 6 on Rhu...
(
17
)
+6
=
23
Ganelon: One of these defenders ought to be doing something about that.
Frezak: Umm.
Wen: Hmm?
Apheori (GM): What?
Ganelon: Am I mistaken?
Frezak: Yeah, Azi's Challenge triggers.
Wen: wait what? but wasn't it replaced with your mark?
Frezak: If you read your power...
Doesn't have to be someone marked BY you at the time.
Just someoen that you attacked and is marked.
Apheori (GM): So why didn't it activate when the swarm attacked Rhu during Rhu's turn?
Frezak: Because we're dumb and don't track things right in our heads.
Apheori (GM): Oh.
Ganelon: That's supposed to be Wen's job.
Wen: it also says "a new mark supersedes a mark that was already in place". I thought that meant the effects no longer apply once the mark is not in effect.
Ganelon: But he's new to this and neither Frezak or I have ever played real paladins.
The most paladin experience I have is with a character who calls herself one but has no ability to defend people and no support from her god.
Frezak: Ummm >.>
I DONT KNOW.
Ganelon: Who marked it last?
Frezak: Me.
Wen: Gravy.
Frezak: We'll go with Azi not triggering.
Ganelon: Then he gets his punishment action.
Frezak: I already did on Azi's turn.
It's an Immediate Interrupt.
Ganelon: Once per round, then?
Right.
Ugh, I hate that rule.
Nothing happens then, just roll the damage.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d6 + 3
(
2
)
+3
=
5
What does ongoing damage mean?
Ganelon: At the start of that person's turn, they take the number specified.
Frezak: ongoing 3.
At the beginning of each of his turns, he takes 3 damage.
At the end of his turn he can try to qave against it.
Ganelon: At the end of their turn they do a saving throw (roll d20) and if it's 10 or higher they stop taking ongoing damage.
Frezak: *save
Ganelon: There are other ways to get saving throws. Also penalties/bonuses that can be applied to them. None are in play right now.
Apheori (GM): Swarm of chickens assaulted. Next.
Oh, wait, it was prone.
That might have affected something.
Frezak: Ohhhh.
THat's true.
WE ARE STUPID.
That's -2 to attack rolls while prone >.>
Apheori (GM): Combat is hard. >.<
Ganelon: It was prone, and marked, so -4.
But she rolled so high I think it hit anyways.
Frezak: yeah.
Ganelon: Result of 19? Yeah, it hit.
Frezak: It will probably spend a move action to stand, though.
Apheori (GM): AGH THIS CHARACTER SHEET IS HORRIBLE.
Okay, it stood at some point.
NEXT.
Ganelon: Far out.
Have another hawk.
rolling 1d20+4
(
12
)
+4
=
16
Reflex?
Apheori (GM): Yuh.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d8+4
(
6
)
+4
=
10
Apheori (GM): Is that halved?
Ganelon: Yes.
Only Radek's damage isn't.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Ganelon: Or if Gravy does some area attack.
Apheori (GM): Also Griebel is crazy.
Frezak: No surprise there.
Apheori (GM): He should turn into something random.
What all can he turn into?
Ganelon: Pretty much any animal.
Frezak: Any animal of roughly equivalent mass.
A large pig.
A midget elephant.
Ganelon: He has a... preference for large guardian sorts, though.
Apheori (GM): He turns into a moose.
Frezak: A small moose, though.
A mooseling.
Mooselet.
Apheori (GM): Yes.
HE'S A MOOSE NOW.
Frezak: Okay.
Gan.
What's his Encounter,
*?
Isn't it the prone if marked thing?
Gan?
Frezak: AM I GONE AGAIN?
Apheori (GM): No.
But he seems to be.
Ganelon: It is.
Frezak: WOULD THAT NOT BE NICE NOW?
Also he has Grounding Shot.
I think.
Ganelon: ...Why would he have Grounding Shot?
Apheori (GM): The moose?
Ganelon: He doesn't even use a ranged weapon.
Apheori (GM): And he's a moose.
Frezak: RAnged powers.
Ganelon: Man, I don't even know.
His encounter is that spirit wolf thing.
But its range is 5.
Frezak: Nevermind >.>
Apheori (GM): Moose.
Ganelon: And yes, he can't do it as a moose.
So his turn is pretty much over.
He runs in circles.
Frezak: Gravytime.
Apheori (GM): Appropriate.
Frezak: I'll open with Roots Of Stone.
I am flanking with RHu so I have Combat advantage.
rolling 1D20+8
(
7
)
+8
=
15
Wen: (brb)
Frezak: AC?
Apheori (GM): 15
Frezak: Ties are hits.
So...
rolling 1D10+4
(
4
)
+4
=
8
Damage is not halved on this.
And if the swarm moves away from me before my next turn, it'll fall prone.
My interrupt is no longer granting CA to allies.
Frezak: And my turn is over.
Ganelon: Aren't they also vulnerable to area moves?
Apheori (GM): The building feels like it's going to fall down.
Frezak: Oh, right.
Another 5 damage.
WHich building?
Apheori (GM): The one you're in.
Frezak: I thought we were outside.
Apheori (GM): I mean, it's giving the feeling. But it's not actually... it still seems structurally sound.
Frezak: Just the sounds its making,
*?
Apheori (GM): You got up the stairs, got swarmed by chickens, and then decided to fight instead of going the rest of the way out the door.
Sounds for you, yes.
Ganelon: I stand up.
Apheori (GM): Radek sees a bit more.
Ganelon: What do I see?
Apheori (GM): The place... twisting.
Cracks in the walls.
Cracks in the air. Shimmering.
Ganelon: Making this attack through Azi, then.
Because he's in range.
[Implement Attack]
rolling 1d20+5+0
(
11
)
+5+0
=
16
Reflex.
Apheori (GM): Aye.
Ganelon: What's the vulnerability for area moves?
5?
Apheori (GM): Mhm.
Frezak: yup
Ganelon:
rolling 1d8+5+5
(
6
)
+5+5
=
16
Not halved.
If the swarm attacks Azi, it takes 2 cold damage.
Frezak: Dude.
Ganelon: Hm?
Frezak: Why didn't you do Thundering?
Bah, nevermind.
Ganelon: Because I would rather we get out of here injured than take a single turn longer than necessary?
My turn is over.
Apheori (GM): Everyone roll a d20.
Ganelon:
rolling 1d20
(
9
)
=
9
Frezak:
rolling 1D20
(
12
)
=
12
That's for Gravy.
Wen:
rolling 1d20
(
13
)
=
13
Rhu:
rolling 1d20
(
13
)
=
13
Greibel:
rolling 1d20
(
17
)
=
17
Apheori (GM): Okay, so chickens attack Azi.
Aziraphale: Ow.
Apheori (GM): Does anyone have a mark that would activlate?
Frezak: I'll interrupt.
rolling 1D20+8
(
5
)
+8
=
13
AC.
Apheori (GM): Nope.
Frezak: Curses.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 + 6 ac on Azi.
(
11
)
+6
=
17
Okay, have at your turn.
Wen: wait, so it didn't do anything because my AC > 17, yes?
Apheori (GM): Right.
Wen: Okay, so Aziraphale uses a Divine Challenge on the swarm.
and then a Forbidding Strike
rolling 1d20 + 6
(
8
)
+6
=
14
...damn it.
I forfeit the move.
so my turn ends.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
Chickens attack Rhu. Do you interrupt it or something?
Ganelon: No, it just takes damage first.
Frezak: I think Azi burns it.
Wen: -2 penalty on attack
Apheori (GM): Ah, okay.
Wen: also +3 radiant damage on attack
Ganelon: But before it makes the attack, it burns... right?
Wen: (against it)
Ganelon: Also I think it's more than +3.
Apheori (GM):
rolling 1d20 + 6
(
8
)
+6
=
14
Frezak: it takes 3 +Cha mod radiant damage for attacking.
Ganelon: I'm pretty sure I gave you a feat that makes it + strength mod as well.
Wen: my cha mod is 0 though.
Apheori (GM): It misses.
Wen: doesn't say on the character sheet at least
Apheori (GM): So it takes 3 + 4 + 5 damage?
Wen: it just deals extra radiant damage
Apheori (GM): Oh.
Wen: I don't know where the +4 +5 came from
the +3, yes.
since it's the first time it's attacking someone else before the end of the turn.
Ganelon: You have a feat that adds your strength modifier to that damage.
Frezak: at least 3+5 since it's 3 radiant.
Ganelon: And because it's radiant, it takes another +5.
Wen: I can link to my character sheet if it isn't against the rules?
I don't see it at least :/
Apheori (GM): https://docs.google.com/file/d/0B9qA2rGREpTJUXczLWlJZFAtRFk/edit?pli=1
Whatever.
Wen: or http://uncy.co/y/az
Apheori (GM): Whatever.
IT GOT HARMED.
Frezak: RHU
Ganelon: Mighty Challenge.
Frezak: WILL POKE IT.
Ganelon: The description sucks but that's what it does.
Apheori (GM): AWESOME.
Frezak:
rolling 1D20+8
(
11
)
+8
=
19
rolling 1D20+8
(
16
)
+8
=
24
HITS.
Wen: urgh, okay.
Apheori (GM): Rhu successfully pokes it.
Frezak:
rolling 2D6+4
(
2
+
5
)
+4
=
11
Radiant.
So... +5:16
halved it 8.
WHOOO
Apheori (GM): Whu successfully kills it.
Ellemerr: You kill the chicken-swarm just as I've read up! Whoo!
Apheori (GM): Bloody horribly boring chicken swarm.
Frezak: Gravy will use his shield as a carrying thing to carry as many dead chickens and he ca;
WELL.
Ellemerr: I thought it was hillarious. xD
Frezak: It SHOULD have been making multiple attacks.
Apheori (GM): Well, maybe.
Frezak:
Wen: I'm just glad it's dead.
Apheori (GM): WHAY DIDN'T YOU SAY SO.
Frezak: It can bite twice on it's turn and had 2 AP.
BECAUSE YOU HAVE OT LEARN TO READ MONSTER SHEETS.
Wen: IT'S DEAD.
DING DONG
Frezak: And I FORGOT.
Apheori (GM): Dude, I don't know what any of this stuff means.
Wen: THE SWARM IS DEAD.
Apheori (GM): So I just ignored the bits I didn't understand.
Which was most of them.
Wen: where's the next convenient break point by the way? I kind of want to get dinner >.>
Frezak: >.>
Apheori (GM): >.>
What did Rhu need to roll to get rid of the necrotic thingy?
Ellemerr: I've just read up! *flails* I have to go to bed sooon!
Apheori (GM): Or can it just go away now?
Frezak: If you don't understand things, please ASK.
Apheori (GM): I did!
I asked about them as they came up!
Frezak: It's easier if it just vanishes.
Apheori (GM): So y'all killed a thing. Greibel's a moose.
What now?
There are cracks everywhere.
Frezak: I'm carrying as many as I can outside.
Ganelon: FLEE.
Apheori (GM): And funny noises.
Did Gravy seriously pick up the chickens and take them with?
Frezak: yes?
Apheori (GM): Who grabs the moose?
Frezak: PIling them on his shield like a platter.
Aziraphale: I do.
Apheori (GM): Okay.
YOU ALL FLEE.
You wind up in the dusk.
There's smoke rising from several buildings.
Frezak: I look for dirt.
Apheori (GM): SHIP is gone.
You're in a parking lot.
There's mostly just cement and asphalt.
There are some potted trees, though.
You could use one of those.
Frezak: that'll do.
I'll uproot the tree.
And bury the chickens.
Apheori (GM): Strength check on tree...?
Frezak:
rolling 1D20+4
(
11
)
+4
=
15
I can just spadechop the roots.
Apheori (GM): It doesn't budge,
You should do that.
Frezak: I will busy myself with the removal of the tree, then.
Apheori (GM): Okay, so you're doing that...
Perhaps this would be a good point to stop. >.>
Ellemerr grumbles.
Apheori (GM): What?
Wen: My stomach concurs >.>
Apheori (GM): As does mine.
It wants lunch.
Also we're missing two of five people already.
Ellemerr: Fiiiiine, go eat your food. I'll find other things to read.
Ganelon: Well, first off, I have some minor matters of business as Radek to take care of.
Firstly, is the world outside still crazy?
Apheori (GM): Much less so.
But yes.
Especially the sky.
And the boats.
Ganelon: Alright then.
Apheori (GM): And the light.
Wen: Can Radek report back without SHIP?
Apheori (GM): He can try.
Wen: damn it, the caps lock indicator thingy on my computer blocks the text input box >.<
Ganelon: I'll save that for when everyone is here.
Wen: Okay, so do we stop here?
Ganelon: I suppose. Just remind me to fix your sword next time
Wen: Okay.
Ganelon: It will cost the equivalent of three gold coins worth of magic dust.
That's very little.
I'll drum up a tab of how much magic dust belongs to each person as we find things for Radek to destroy, though.
Frezak: We'd need magic things, though.
Ganelon: Yes.
Frezak: Unless we melt down someone's arm.
Ganelon: Basically, I'm putting this ritual on his tab.
He owes me three pinches of residuum.
Frezak: Greibel will pay you in drugs.
And I'm sorry for the boring fight >.>
Ganelon: It's fine.
Wen: so do we agree on a time for the next session or...?
Ganelon: I'm fine with "not tomorrow".
Any time after tomorrow is suitable.
Frezak: Yeah, I have a game HOPEFULLY WITH GAN tomorrow.
Ganelon: Of course with me.
Apheori (GM): Can everyone make it monday?
Frezak: SHould do.
Ganelon: Sure, though you'll want to ask the other two who aren't here, of course.
Frezak: Or put them in a box.
Wen: (Monday works for me)
(well, anything works until the end of next week pretty much)
Apheori (GM): Let's aim for that, then, and see what we can do with the others.
Frezak: boxes.
Ellemerr: Get going to where you find me! Never mind that I'll be gone again almost at once; we can have an awkward first introduction and then you'll be lucky enough to not see my gal for a while and it'll be swell! Yeah!
Apheori (GM): Ellemerr: It could take awhile. >.>
Ellemerr: ... I know.
Don't worry about it. I'll read and... do all the things I need to do.
Apheori (GM): Right.
Wen: same time on monday?
or different time?
Apheori (GM): Same, probably.
Wen: okay
...anything else? Otherwise I'm going to go console my poor stomach.
Apheori (GM): FOOOOOOD.
Wen: FOOOOOOD. 
</pre>